Iggy Pop and the Stooges Riders



Iggy Pop and the Stooges Riders
Marvellous and Most Instructive Information Document
Including Utterly Confusing Comments and Asides.
(May cause slight irritation down under...)
First of all, can I say what a pleasure it will be to work with you all.
By the way, some people have been saying very nice things about this rider, which has made me
(Jos Grain) feel a bit of a fraud.
I must admit that most of it was actually ghost-written for me. I merely took dictation – from a ouija
Please do not forget to read the Pre-Production Checklist as the last 3 pages of this rider and read
it from time to time between now and the show. At least once, anyway.
I won't spoil it by telling you the ending, but it's jolly exciting!
Think 'Pirates of the Caribbean' re-invented as an Ice Spectacular, with Johnny Depp going "Ooh,
suits you sir!" at the end when the bird and the bloke kiss, and you'll be halfway there.
Marvellous stuff!
As of Apr 8th 2013
Backline Requirements
3 X HEAVY DUTY FLOOR MOUNTED FANS. Similar to the one pictured below. I'm making a hovercraft in my
spare time –
1 X SINGLE X TYPE FRAME KEYBOARD STAND I don’t mean X in a nasty, pornographic sort of way. Or even a
nice pornographic sort of way.
2 X LANEY NEXUS 8 x 10 BASS CABINETS (There's lovely)
3 X LANEY NEXUS TUBE BASS AMPLIFIERS Please make sure they're good ones or we'll all end up as
wormlike web-based life forms in the bass player's online literary diarrhea. Honestly. He's like a sort of internet
Pepys or Boswell, except without the gout and the syphilis. For all I know.
{I bet I know what you are thinking. You're thinking "Laney Bass Gear? I didn't know Laney made bass gear. "Well,
they do! And very good it is too. Some time, you should try it out, and if you run a hire company, you should buy
some and start renting it. They make Ampeg gear sound like er... Ampeg gear. Anyway that's not the point is it? If
you were thinking what I thought you were thinking, i.e. that you don't have any Laney bass gear, we will have to
have Ampeg instead, won't we? Happy now?}
So the alternative to the Laney bass gear would be
3 x Eden VT300 bass amps – (1 is a spare)
2 x Eden D810 bass cabinets
Or an alternative to the Eden bass gear would be
3 x Ampeg SVT 2 or Classic CL amplifiers - NOT the SVT 2 PRO version,
just the standard SVT 2 please. and
2 x Ampeg 8x10 cabinets I still think it's a damn shame you don't have the
Laney’s, but never mind. I'm sure Satan will find a suitable way to punish you
in the hereafter. Or the thereafter, depending on where you are standing at the time.
Blackstar Guitar Amplification for the guitar
2 x Artisan 4 x12 Slant Cabinets
2 x Artisan H30 Amp Heads
1 x Artisan 30 Combo Amp
All in a gorgeous burgundy, but not a gorgeous Burgundy, otherwise someone will wine at me.
If you cannot supply Blackstar then we would opt for Marshall
3 x Marshall JCM800 heads. Definitely not JCM 900s please, as they are shit. Sorry Mr. Marshall, but the truth will
2 x Marshall 1960 4 x 12 A cabs
1 x VOX AC 30 Combo
Backline Requirements (contd)
Also, could you make sure they have been tested recently? And when I say "recently", I don't mean "Sometime in
the three weeks preceding the occasion when it fell 3 metres off the top shelf in the warehouse as we were forklifting it back up, after it came back from that Inane Clown Pussy gig where they had the 'Piss On The Live
Amplifier Competition
(If you make smoke and sparks come out, and you are still alive afterwards, we'll give you a bottle of Miller Lite.
And a go on the band's skateboard.
And some clown make up.
And Hepatitis B...)
The sound it made as it hit the concrete!! BAD-OI-OI-OING!!! How we laughed"
No! I mean recently. Within living memory. Preferably that of a goldfish.
There should be at least six (6) knobs - which our guitar roadie, Slouch, will personally count on arrival, and trust
me, he's a very good counter. I once saw him count four dozen packets of guitar strings in what seemed to be the
blink of an eye, but was probably more like 20 seconds. I would say he is the closest thing we have in our touring
party to a mathematical genius. Incredibly handsome too. He used to appear on the cover of punk rock magazines
as a male model, back in the day. Never in the night though, as he is incredibly difficult to illuminate, due to his
silvery, almost fish-like skin, which he uses to confuse predators.
Where was I?
Oh yes.
And the names of these knobs shall be WAR, PESTILENCE, FAMINE...Aargh!
What am I saying? I mean
forget all this. Just get us the amps
Moving on...
2 x single GUITAR STANDS
6 X HEAVY DUTY SPEAKER CABLES. (4 x 1 metre and 2 x 2 metre) So
we can plug all the speakers in, and still waste half an hour wondering why we've
got two speaker cables left over.
NB Please do not take the liberty of improvising or altering this list on our behalf.
Backline Requirements (contd)
A SPARKLING DRUM KIT (not black please)
Can the drumkit be an old Gretsch or Ludwig please?
Could you possibly send us a list of the drumkits you can provide? That would be a great help.
Something like an old Ludwig or Gretsch would be fantastic, whereas something like a Pearl would be chopped
into a minimum of one hundred pieces, and each of these would be further chopped into one hundred pieces, and
so on, until all that it left is sawdust and iron filings.
1 x 24 x 14” inch BASS DRUM, or Kick Drum if you prefer to call it that. What's that in centimetres? 66, 69
possibly? If you have a girlfriend, now is the time to ask where you keep the tape measure. If you have a
boyfriend, he's probably sitting on it. The depth of the Bass drum is important. It has to be quite shallow (not
as shallow as I am, obviously). So a 24” x 14” is ideal.
1 X 13” x 9” TOM-TOM, WITH MOUNTING. And if you can't bring the mounting to us, we'll have to send a bloke
called Mohammed to the mounting. And the mounting should be a snare drum stand. Here endeth the sermon on
the mount.
1 x 16” x 16” FLOOR TOM WITH LEGS. Not stand mounted.
1 x 18” x 16” inch FLOOR TOM WITH LEGS. Not stand mounted.
ALL OF THE ABOVE fitted with Remo Ambassador Coated heads on top. They don’t have to be brand spanking
new, as I think you’ll find our drummer is going to spank them fairly thoroughly himself; but newish, anyway.
2 x Gretsch or Ludwig 6 1/2” x 14 “ WOOD SNARE DRUMS
Both complete with new Remo CS batter coated heads, and unbent snares please.
2 X DW 5000 BASS DRUM PEDAL. Double chain type. With a footplate.
And a little blue plaque with "William Shakespeare slept here for six months* in 1586 shagging the arse off of Anne
Hathaway." (*Not the whole six months, obviously. I think they interrupted them at mealtimes.)
2 X DW 6300 SNARE DRUM STANDS, If not the 6300 series, then some other type of snare stand, the simpler
the better, (not the offset kind), and preferably with legs that can be flattened against the floor.
1 X DW 5100 DRUM THRONE or similar. Because he's a king. But not a very comfortable one.
1 X DW 6100 HI-HAT STAND. With three legs please.
4 X DW 6700 STRAIGHT CYMBAL STANDS. But we are equal opportunity employers, so gay stands may apply
also. (They won't get the fucking job, though...)
If DW 6000 series stands are not available, then we will accept Tama stands, but NOT any other DW stands!
SABIAN CYMBALS, as follows and if required – Drummer may bring own cymbals
1 x Pair of 15 inch HI-HAT CYMBALS that sound nice and are roughly the same size
1 x 19 inch CRASH CYMBAL
1 x 18 inch CRASH CYMBAL
2 x 22 inch CHINA CYMBAL
1 X 20 inch RIDE CYMBAL
If the specified drums and hardware are not available, please let us know ASAP what other drumkits are
All of the above drums on a CARPETED 8ft x 8ft x 2ft DRUM RISER/PLATFORM.
That's a 3m x 2m x 0.75m DRUM RISER/PLATFORM for those of you who live in the metric zone
6’ or 8’ x 4’ x 2’ riser for the Blackstar guitar cabinets
Note to our American brethren: A metre is about 3 feet 3 inches.
And 'metre' is 'meter' spelt correctly...
Oi Oi, that's yer lot.
Monitor Requirements
We need: one (1) monitor man who speaks good English and is not afraid of death.
{Only joking.... or am I?}.
Also, he needs to know a little bit about monitors. This may seem a little obvious,but believe me....
(For example, in Santiago de Compostela, in Galicia in Northern Spain, they
appear to think if they just ignore riders like this, then supply a fat, bearded, ignorant hippy with a digital monitor
desk (doh!) who doesn't know shit about e-cueing, and monitor wedges that would be better suited to wedging
doors open, and a load of stage managers and PA geezers and promoters reps who shout a lot – that this is the
same as actually providing what the band needs in order to do a gig to the best of their ability. And that if they
deny that their sub-standard, home-made gear is no good, it will suddenly, mysteriously, become good.
Well, I would just like to say that the next time Iggy and the Stooges get booked for their festival, I'm going to turn
up with some pickled eggs, a small blue vibrator with a jelly dolphin balanced on the shaft, a set of dog-eared
encyclopedia with the volume E-G missing, a long weight, and a screwdriver that's been accidentally dropped in a
And then, when they say, "That's not Iggy and the Stooges",
I'm going to say, "Yes it is!"
And then they'll say "No it isn't".
And I'm going to say, "Yes it IS!!!"
See how they like it, the fuckers!
Anyway, where was I? Oh yes...
We do not have our own monitor man, because in the future robots will work for us and make the world a better
place. I know. I read it in a book
Sorry about that rant about Santiago, by the way. I just wanted to get it off my chest, and killing people is just sooo
1980s, don't you think?
The next page contains the information you require. Bear with me. Not a real bear, of course.
Oh, and speaking of bears:
Here's the Monitor Info
All wedges must be mirrored pairs that are bi-amped, powerful, very loud, Uncompressed and unlimited.
Mix 1 - Front Vocal Wedges.
Can we arrange to have these wedges off the front of the stage on some kind of platform that is safe, secure and
the same height as the stage.
(see stage plan)
This will make me very happy, like a happy little bunny rabbit.
About Iggy's vocal - we need a lot. The best thing is, make it strong and punchy, a bit like a boxing kangaroo.
Then turn it up.
When you think you have turned it up enough, turn it up some more!.
Mix 2 - Side Vocal Wedges
SAXOPHONE [during the songs marked "saxophone"]
One on stage left, one on stage right, facing towards centre stage, and switched up so loud it feels like they are
eating your ears. These are pick-up wedges, so that Iggy can hear his voice in between the centre wedges and
the sidefills. Because he won’t stay still. He’s not Uglio Piglesias, or whatever his name is.
Mix 3 - Sidefill Stage Right
GUITAR..clear and bright, like the
sound of jackboots on wet cobblestones,
on a beautiful spring morning in1932,
just before it all went a bit sour...
Right Mix 4 - Sidefill Stage left
Warm, but not humid.
...Like Cali !!!
For the sidefills, can we have two great big huge enormous things please, of a type that might be venerated as
gods by the inhabitants of Easter Island, capable of reaching volumes that would make Beelzebub soil his
underpants, and driven by amplifiers that could provide the power for a Monster Truck Rally. With dinosaur drivers.
They should be as far downstage as possible
Monitor Info (contd)
Mix 5 - Guitar Wedge
[I know it's always bottom. I'm obsessed with bottoms. I make no apology for that.]
Lots and lots of ACOUSTIC GUITAR.
No, really. Lots! Lots and lots and lots.
How can I explain this?
I know, I’ll strum the guitar during the soundcheck, and you push the volume up until you see a little bit of blood
come out of my ear...
Mix 6 - Bass Guitar Wedge
Lots of BASS D.I.
Oh, and during the show, could you just catch his eye and mouth the words "I love you"? Thanks.
Mix 7 – Drums 2 x Wedges
RACK TOM just a tiny amount
VOCAL (Just a little)
We would like to have two good wedges for the drums please, on the riser, one on each side of the drummer, with
horns pointing roughly straight down his ear canal; and when I say good wedges of course, what I mean is two big,
powerful buggers; a dormant volcano, ever waiting to erupt into streams of audio lava. Not something that has a
label on it saying "Karaoke in your own home, 15 watts per channel max".
Mix 8 - Saxophone Wedge
Wedge Suitability Guide
Here are several quick ways to find out if the wedges you are using are NOT really very suitable for a Iggy and the
Stooges concert.
1). They were removed from the parcel shelf of a 1974 Ford Cortina.
2.) When you look underneath, it says "©The Disney Corporation-collect all 5
3.) They can be lifted above head height - easily - by your wife.
4). Er...
5.) That's it!
Jos Grain's almost-Zen method of Iggy-Pop-vocal mic-in-the-monitors style testing type stuff.
(A kind of satellite navigator for the monitors. I made it up myself, so let's call it "Twat-Nav").
Here is a useful, I hope, guide to doing monitors for Iggy and the Stooges.
It's not a conventional method, because I don't know anything about frequencies.
The last time I told a monitor man that the monitors were folding back a bit, he looked at me really weird, then he
MONITOR MAN "What do you mean?"
ME "Well you know, there's some really high pitched foldback in the monitors."
MONITOR MAN: "You mean feedback?"
ME: "Do I? "
MONITOR MAN: " What frequency?"
ME: "Er, every time I point this mic at the wedges..."
Anyway... my voice is what we doctors call "not very loud," and it's quite thin as
well. I've seen fatter supermodels.
Whereas Iggy's voice is rather powerful, and also very rich and frequency-full.
So what I've found works quite well is, if we EQ the vocal mics so that my voice
sounds completely normal, with no frequencies boosted, especially at the bottom
end, and we turn it up so that it's as loud as a very loud thing, then when Iggy
starts singing into it, all those lost frequencies will return and everything will be
You might even have to turn it down a bit.
And here's another thing you might be able to help me with. Why is it that
lighting men switch the strobes on for ages, while everybody is trying to work,
and when you ask why, they say they are "testing them"?
Strobes are designed to be intermittent, aren't they?
So how can they tell they're not fucked?
I know what I’m going to do. I’m going to buy a small strobe light from Maplins or Radio Shack or somewhere, and
then, when I arrive a gig, I’m going to mount it on the lighting desk, switch it on, and walk off.
On the next pages you will find a stage plan and input list. Isn't it exciting? I bet you're glad you
decided on a career in the music business now...
Before we have a look at the stage plan, can I just say that we like to keep it as clear as possible,
especially at the front.
This means all cables for the downstage wedges etc must be run off the front in the pit, or around
the back of the drum riser, not across the front of the stage,.
My insurance doesn't cover me for allowing rock stars to fall off the front of the stage.
No lighting or monitor cables, no power cables, no toy robots, no television evangelists, no
television cameramen, no substances related to the manufacture of creosote, no plastic
seahorses, no bailiwicks, no crepuscules, no kooks and especially NO CAMERAMEN.
Now Iggy can run around in his customary manner, like a crazed running-around type- thing, and
we can all relax in a haze of self-satisfied panic.
Please do keep the stage area clear from all liggers, photographers, anyone who pretends to be a
photographer, even if they say “But I am the festival photographer”. It doesn’t matter, they should
not be on stage. The stage is a place for only those that need to be there as in working personnel.
For those who are graced with the privilege of watching the show from the stage they should
always be directed to stage right, stage left is to be kept clear at all times from 30mins prior to
performance as this will be the band access to the stage. Please construct a small secluded area
with a small table, 1 regular folding type chair to act as a holding area pre show and for the encore
period, this again should be on stage left side. A bit like the one that Stevie Nicks used to have,
but without the kneeling stool and the straw up the bottom. Allegedly...
Stage Plan
VERY IMPORTANT - There are to be no cables whatsoever downstage, all cables must be run off the front of the
stage or around the back of the drum riser.
These monitors should be off the main stage and ideally strapped on a centre thrust level with the stage, 1m Deep
x 2/3m Wide. There should be a set of steps or some boxes to allow the singer access to pit?
Good isn't it? I could have been a draughtsman, but we was poor in them days, and what with the
war still going on, and the bubonic plague, we had to give up on even the simplest of pleasures.
My toy tank was sent off to the Weapons Department, melted down, and made into a real tank. I
still miss sitting inside it, firing shells at the neighbours' chimneypots, and machine-gunning cats.
Happy Days.
I wonder if the Fonz still looks 40.
Apparently Iggy met that Ron Howard once. You know, the ugly, baldy one out of Happy Days.
Directs films. Got one of those faces you'd never get tired of punching.
Snare Top
Snare Bottom
Floor Tom 1
Floor Tom 2
O.H. S/R
O.H. S/L
Bass DI
Beyer M88
Beta 98
Beta 98
Beta 98
Beta 98
Bass Mic
Guitar – L
Guitar – R
Iggy Vocal 1
Iggy Vocal 2
Iggy Vocal 3
Beta 52
KSM 27
KSM 27
Small Boom
Small Boom
Small Boom
Large Boom
Large Boom
Large Straight
FOH Insert
DS201 Gate
DS201 Gate
DS201 Gate
DS201 Gate
DS201 Gate
Drawmer 1960 or DBX160SL
Drawmer 1960 or DBX160SL
Drawmer 1960 or DBX160SL
Drawmer 1960 or DBX160SL
Sub Groups
Comp. Drums L
Comp. Drums R
Yamaha SPX2000
Lexicon PCM81
Eventide H3000
TC D2 - 1
TC D2 - 2
Main Mix
Left Mix
Right Mix
Avalon 747
Avalon 747
Please provide first class stereo PA system that is capable of delivering at least 120 dB A-weighted at FOH mixing
position. Coverage must be even throughout the venue and in-fills, out-fills and delays should be employed where
FOH Desk
Please provide one of the following
Digidesign D-Show Profile mix system.
Midas XL4
Midas Heritage 3000
Microphones and DI’s
We will provide all Microphones and DIs.
I have Iggy’s mics on long leads, I need three inputs just to stage right of the front centre
Well, we might need one or two, but what’s life without a bit of suspense?
Mic Stands
2 x Large Boom ,1 x Large Straight with a round base, 3 x Small Boom
We will supply Iggy’s vocal mic stands that are easy to throw and hard to break.
FX, Dynamics and EQ (only required if providing an analogue desk)
3 x Drawmer DS201 Noise Gates (6 channels)
2 x Drawmer 1960 Stereo Valve Compressors or DBX 160SL (4 channels)
5 x DBX160
1 x BSS DPR402
1 x Yamaha SPX2000
1 x Lexicon PCM80/70
1 x Eventide H3000
2 x TC D2 Digital Delay
1 x DN360 31 Band Graphic
1 x Avalon 747
1 x Intercom between FOH and Monitors
1 x Talk to stage switch mic
1 x CD Player
1 x iPod Cable
All racks and desk must be well lit.
Please supply all microphone cables inc. 3 x 20metre/50’ cables for the main vocal lines.
Any audio questions please contact:
Max Bisgrove +44 7748 647825
Or you can email him at [email protected]
Please cc Henry McGroggan [email protected]
[This was written by someone who doesn't really know what he's talking about. I cannot tell a lie. Lights-wisely
speaking, I'm an absolute arse-head.
But I know what I like. And although nobody goes home whistling the lights, it's also true that no one goes to gigs
to stare at the fucking P.A. stacks.]
We do not have a lighting designer, or lighting person of any kind.
We had a lighting designer once, but he went mad, so we shot him. It was the kindest thing. Now he's a light of a
different kind, one of God's little Gobos in Dimmer Heaven.
The point of all this nonsense is, of course, that we need someone to brighten up our day, and this is what we
would like them to do, if it is at all possible using the whiz-bang technology that is the modern lighting system.
You know in the olden days, when knights were bold and the normal club lighting system was three flaming
torches made out of sticks, peasant rags and animal fat, lighting designers used to use these things called
"washes". Nowadays, of course, "washes" are more likely to be skin embrocations that serve to keep the lighting
designer's complexion un-pasty, but in those unsophisticated times they were a bunch of lights, usually all the
same colour, or color, which made the stage go, for example, red. Or blue. Or white.
We-ell. That's what we want, really.
Someone to colour the stage while the band plays, in very basic colours. (Not Benetton! ) Especially white.
I mean, a nice white backdrop with some color scrollers pointed at it would be nice too, so that we could have, say,
orange in the background and blue on the stage. But basically, that's it.
Oh, and a lighting person who could just set a scene at the beginning of a song, then sit on his hands until the
start of the next song. I know that this seems like a tall order when most LDs suffer from some sort of nervous
disorder that won't permit their hands to stay still for longer than 8 milliseconds, but honestly, that's what we would
be happiest with. Maybe we could get somebody to sit next to the LD with a big stick, then if they looked like they
were going to "do lighting" halfway through a number - WHAMMO!!! broken desk, broken fingers.
As for smoke, if you could save it for sending messages to indigenous North American tribes people, I, Big Chief
Fucks-Around-With-Drums, would be um heap grateful.
"And moving lights?" I hear you ask. If you do have access to moving lights, I would prefer it if you would move
them to the back of the stage, and leave them there. It's not that we dislike them, it's just that we think they may be
a little shall we say, overused? these days. Keep a couple for throwing static shapes in the background if you like.
That might be interesting...
Lights directly in the eyes are a real problem for the singer, so we don't like spotlights or lights on the sidefills , or
lights on trusses over the audience etc.
I know we have to light him up a bit but we have to try to do this using the lights directly above him.
Sometimes we do gigs where the LD tries to sneak the spotlights on, or starts flashing the lights halfway through
the show. Unfortunately, if that does happen, it then becomes encumbent upon me to find the LD after the show
and eat his entire family.
We really just need someone to set a scene for each song, then leave it. It's not really too much to ask, is it?
If anyone can come up with a suggestion for lighting that would add to the overall excitement of the Stooges stage
show, I would be pleased to hear it, but if it's
along the lines of "When they do a fast song, I think I should flash all the lights
quite quickly, whereas if they do a slower song, I think should flash all the lights,
but at a slightly reduced rate", do please keep it to yourselves. My boredom threshold is incredibly low...
So-ooo, just to recap:
5 or 6 washes in strong colours such as red, blue, white, orange, 181, that type of thing.
Colour scrollers juxtaposing background colours to the washes.
Static goboid shapes in the background. Static means "not moving".
Oh yes, some molefays pointing at the audience. The band likes to see their happy
faces from time to time. God knows why.
NO flashing and moving lights e.g. scans and strobes.
NO smoke machines/dry ice/foggers blah blah (I know lighting designers love to see their beams, but not I! I don't
care if I never see another beam in my life...)
NO Spotlights and other lights in the eyes.
I can promise you that our singer (Iggy Pop, by the way) will make it look like all
your lights are attempting to jump off the front of the stage like a gang of par 64
lemmings. He'll be all over the place, like a mad man's shit, so you don't have
worry about moving lights.
Here's a thought for you. Why not watch the band instead of trying to make patterns with the beams? Unless you
can think of a way of writing "OH DO FUCK OFF, JOS" in beams across the stage....
I hope this is of some use to you. If not, you can always use the other side of this
sheet of paper for doodling on. I'll even give you a pen. I can't say fairer than that,
now can I?
Some people get it, some people don't.
Thanks for caring
Your pal
By the way - we do have a theater size lighting plot available if that helps. Just let us know and we’ll send it.
Filming Requirements
Filming - a TV Eye view of the world.
Hello everybody. This is a short message, from Stooges Base Camp, to TV companies, Video makers,
Photographers and Media Types in general.
Now don't get me wrong, I have a lot of respect for people in the communications
industry, in fact my ancestors have a particularly strong historical link with the
Postal Service, as someone once threw a mailman at my mother.
However in recent years, and I'm sure you'll agree with me on this one, there has
been an explosion in the number of, shall we say, persons blessed by the Good
Lord with a complete absence of talent (aka reality TV stars), attempting to force their way, by any means
necessary, into the public eye. Hand in hand with this, I'm afraid to say, has come a massive increase in
the amount of production companies willing to
massage the over-large egos of these unfortunate individuals, and to allow them
the airtime they crave. It's got to a point where there are companies who assume
that everyone who walks onto a stage is a desperate, attention-seeking moron, who will put up with any
amount of intrusion just to get themselves a little footage.
I have to say that The Stooges are not those guys!
Media attention - GOOD! Interfering with performance - BAD!
Could I therefore request that all putative film-makers and budding Hollywood
directors ask themselves the following questions:
1. What type of film am I trying to make?
2. Am I making a pop video, or am I documenting a live show?
Because the fact is, as soon as you push a camera into the face of an artiste, you
completely change the nature of their performance. Iggy and the Stooges do try to give
their audience a great show, but I think there is nothing more soul-destroying than
to see a band on stage surrounded by cameramen and their assistants scurrying
about like bazooka-wielding hobbits. At a wet festival somewhere I once saw a
guitarist being followed all over the stage by a cameraman and sidekick, all
covered in bright fluorescent plastic sheeting, including the camera. It looked like
he was being stalked by a demented pantomime horse! I personally thought it
looked absolutely terrible, and I speak as someone who believes that most rock
and roll bands would be improved by the introduction of a pantomime horse.
Take the Rolling Stones as an example.; if you could guarantee that there was
going to be a pantomime horse, it' would be almost worth going to one of their
With today's technology, anyone can get a decent shot of anything without a man
in a little go-kart tracking its every move. It's unnecessary, and it looks horrible.
Fly-on-the-wall, lovey, think fly-on-the-wall. It's just a gig. Nobody's going to get
an Oscar for Best Camerawork. And that's it, really
Filming Requirements (contd)
Oh wait... One more small point:
Iggy adores breaking cameras. Did I mention that??
So really it's best not to get too close to him. Especially if he looks at you in a
funny way.
Cameramen - if he heads towards you looking like he's about to grab the
camera - he's probably about to grab the camera. It's a sort of clue...
Of course, I will be on hand to try and prevent him from destroying your
equipment; unfortunately, there is only one person I can think of who likes to
break cameras more than Iggy does, and that's ME...
Thanks very much for your kind attention. You'll get some intense footage
whatever happens. Trust me on this one.
Jos. (The ugly one on the crew, possibly wearing a hat and a very, er, visual shirt.)
By the way, I wonder if anyone in media knows why certain cameramen think it’s
innovative and exciting to be constantly moving the camera whilst filming,
swinging it up in the air, running around with it swaying from side to side in
great big arcs, or even worse, going wide/tele/wide/tele/wide/tele in a pathetic
attempt to keep in time with the music?
Don't they ever watch back what they've filmed?
Don't any of their colleagues ever tell them that it looks shit?
Is it just me who feels like smacking them across the back of the head with a tripod?
For fuck's sake, someone have a word! It didn't look good in 1980, and it doesn't look good now.
If they really can't hold the camera steady for longer than a couple of seconds, maybe it's time to ring
Alcoholics Anonymous...
Just a thought.
Security, Parking and something else
We will require the use of two dedicated and intensely loyal security persons to be stationed at the
entrance to each of the dressing rooms. Or do I mean one at each? Otherwise that would be four,
and I think we only need two, one at each door. Wait a minute, let's start again.
May we have two dedicated and intensely loyal security men, preferably built like brick shithouses, one for each of the doors leading to the dressing rooms?
Unless either of the dressing rooms has an extra door... OK...
Please count the number of doorways leading in or out of the two dressing rooms that we are
going to be using, then supply an unspecified number of security men, with the qualities
mentioned above, the quantity of whom shall be exactly proportional to the number of said doors,
adhering strictly to a ratio of 1:1.
So probably two in total.
They need to be in position 1 hour prior to, and 1 hour after, the band's performance. And the
band play for about one and a half hours. So that's about...ooh, let me see, three and a half hours
Call it four just in case they do a particularly long version of one the songs.
No entrance to these rooms during these times will be allowed without coordination of the tour
manager. Let's hope he's got his co-ordination back by then.
Artist parking area passes will be required for 4 cars. Sometimes tour bus parking is
required - although some of those American limos are as long as a tour bus... And
that one that Madonna rides around in has a lap dancer in it! Can you believe that?
!?!? I wonder how that affects the insurance premium? If we are carrying our own backline then, a
space for a Mercedes Sprinter type vehicle will be required.
Notes :Nothing to do with security or parking but to do with rooms although we do need these rooms
3 large industrial fans to be provided by promoter two on stage and one in the
dressing room for use by the drummer. He's practicing that scarf thing that they
used to do in Bon Jovi and Heart videos.
We will require the exclusive use of two dressing rooms for the entire day of our
performance. Did I mention about the two dressing rooms before? I think I did. They should have
the ability to be temperature regulated by the occupants with both heat and air-conditioning, and
have 120 volt electrical service in each. Which normally means a really iffy-looking wall socket
that's already got three things plugged into it, one of which is the entire stage lighting rig. But let's
hope this time it's different...
We also require the use of one production office with 1 direct telephone line and internet. This
room should have at least 2 large size tables and seating for 6 people.
Hot and cold running water as well as a private bathroom would be very useful too.
Catering Requirements
Hello. This is a list of stuff we need for the day of our show. It's not too
complicated, but if you've got any problems, talk to us and we'll resolve them. I think you'll find
we're very reasonable people. Except me.
First of all, and most importantly.
Stage Drinks - Please have at least one case (24 small bottles) of still water
and 24 towels available 30 minutes before the Stooges go on stage, and
handed directly to one of the stage monkeys, such as Jos Grain (that’s me).
Can we have strong coffee & tea with milk, sugar, spoons, etc. all day? You
can provide a kettle or a coffee machine if you like, otherwise I'm sure there's a Starbucks in your
area. If there isn't, this is God telling you to open one. ....... Oh, and some cups.
A bit of assorted food for the crew is always appreciated, at lunchtime. Like a lot of people, we like
tasty food that isn't full of pesticides and mad cow disease. Thick (but not too thick) vegetarian
soup is a safe bet, with some salads and fresh bread; that type of thing. Lovely. For about 4 or 5
At load-out time, when we're going to leave, we like to be supplied with two enormous pizzas,(
either to eat, or to leave on the bus until we find a truckstop trashcan with an entrance about
10cm/2 inches round, then we desperately try to fold the enormous stiff pizza box so that it's small
enough to go in, which it never is, so we leave it on the side with all cold tomato puree and stringy
cheese stuff dripping out of the side...There are similar pizzas being thrown out of most bands'
busses at any hour of the day or night so it looks like a bunch of Dali's clocks... Anyway... one
quattro formaggio and one hot pepperoni. Or if there's no pizza available, some sandwiches or
sandwich making ingredients. Bread, like baguettes (en belgique, d'une boulangerie qui est
specialisée en baguettes) cheese, mustard, salad, maybe a bit of ham and chicken. But hopefully
not one of those sandwiches from Subway with beef and alfalfa sprouts sticking out, like a Florida
retiree's bikini bottoms. Yuk.
And some fresh fruit. Yum yum.
3 litres of still water
4 litres of sparkling water
6 empty beer bottles
1 litre of fruit juice. ..........I like grapefruit, but I’m not allowed it because it interferes with my
statins, apparently. So something else. Bloody orange again, I suppose... or maybe Cranberry
Catering Requirements (contd)
Dinner for twelve people should be available, cooked at the venue or supplied by a local
restaurant, either at the restaurant or brought to the venue. We need to have a selection of
chicken, fish, and vegetarian. Calling Germany ... vegetarian means "does not have any meat in
it". That includes sausage and chicken. And whatever 'speck' is.
Dinner for Iggy and two other people should be available at the venue or at a local restaurant,
after the show. Local cuisine is acceptable, (i.e. local food for local people) or steak/chicken,
endangered species (excluding moths and anything really cute), snake, whale, or nurse shark, with the nurse on the side, just in case. Well, we could get bitten, couldn't we?
One hot meal for a lactose intolerant.band member. To be served in the Stooges dressing room
15 minutes after showtime. 1/2 of a roasted chicken, roasted potatoes and salad. No cheese,
milk or butter to be used. All sauces and/or dressings to be served on the side in case they might
contain milk products.
One (1) pack of Poker size playing cards (such as Bee, Bicycle, or Aviation). For me. In case I
want to do some card tricks. Or in case one of the band's girlfriends fancies a quick game of strip
poker while the band are on stage. For money, naturally.
Eric Fischer, The Stooges Road Manager, would like to acquire some pins, or badges, I think he
means, that signify the current country (yours) so he can stick them on his tour jacket and look like
a big YMCA power walker or something. Is this feasible? You might have to call him to get a
sensible version of this request. I feel all nerdy just typing it..
Breaking News! Eric no longer requires these bits and bobs, so please ignore the last instruction. I
don't know why, maybe he's gone off badgers. I can understand that. Hands up anyone who can
name even one thing that badgers have done to enhance our lives ? You can't, can you? All
badgers ever do is have adventures with rats and moles, and they give cattle TB.. And what's the
stripe in their hair all about? Who do they think they are, Dave Vanian?
Maybe they do, in which case it could be due to a form of damned newrose-is.
Damned if I know. And damned if I don’t.
Anyway, no pins for Eric, that's my point. Unless you are an acupuncturist.
We need three dressing rooms to be made available for our sole use, viz.
Catering Requirements (contd)
Dressing Room One. For “Iggy...”
You know what would be really nice? If you could make this room look less like a typical rock &
roll dressing room and more sort of.... Interesting? Are you with me? Just let someone loose with
a little bit of artistic flair... Er, do you know any homosexuals? And am I allowed to say that?
Probably not.
Please do not display any posters relating to the current show/festival, or posters of any past
shows or festivals, inside this room. No festival running orders or show times and suchlike either.
Just some nice art and things to look at in a meditative kind of way. And maybe something to
smash! (Just a little joke., nobody's going to smash anything. Not deliberately, anyway.)
Sensible chairs (what does that mean? you might be asking, and to tell you the
truth, I'm not sure myself. I think it means we don't want chairs that are prone to taking stupid
risks, or making silly claims without thinking them through. So, you know, sensible chairs. Chairs
with a grip on reality and feet on the floor.)
Heating and/or air conditioning that works efficiently, and is suitable for the local climate and the
time of year; in other words, if we were to arrive in, say, Alaska in the winter, and there was just
an air conditioner, that would be a bad thing, but if there was a great big roaring open fire, with
marshmallows toasting on it, that would be a good thing.
A Clothes rail with hangers
A carpet would be appreciated too. Preferably on the floor. (with the chair on top) This dressing
room should contain:
• A folding, metal chair, such as this one for example.
It has to fold, so that Eric can trap his thumb in it every night. You will recognize Eric because he
has these enormous thumbs. Very handy for hitch-hiking, and for approving things, such as the
folding metal chair in the dressing room. If Eric is not with us it means he hitch hiked, got a lift and
his enormous thumbs worked a treat.
• A kettle or water heating device of some description.
• Some fresh ginger, honey, lemons, and a sharp knife. So we can make ginger, honey and
lemon tea. God knows why.
• An English language newspaper like the New York Times or the Miami
Herald. Or the Guardian (my personal favourite). Or a copy of USA Today that's got a story about
morbidly obese people in it. Most amusing!
Catering Requirements (contd)
• Somebody dressed as Bob Hope doing fantastic Bob Hope impersonations and telling all those
hilarious Bob Hope jokes about golf and Hollywood and Bing Crosby.
Oh God, I wish I'd been alive in those days, so that Bob Hope could have come and entertained
me in some World War 2 hell-hole before I went off and got shot. What joy they must have
• Seven dwarves, dressed up as those dwarves out of that marvelous Walt Disney film about the
woman who goes to sleep for a hundred years after biting a poisoned dwarf, or maybe after
pricking her finger on a rather sharp apple... or something. What was the name of that film? Oooh,
it's on the tip of my tongue. Was it Cinderella? Doesn't matter, we just want the dwarves. As I
have said before, we are all for equal opportunities, so taller people are acceptable, of course, as
long as they re dressed as dwarves. It's attitude, more than altitude, that's important here. Don't
forget the pointy hats!
If neither of the above are available we will settle for a belly dancer. In fact, she can use my belly
to dance on...
• A big bucket of ice, or a refrigerator, containing:
• 8 Small bottles of room temperature mineral water.
I think it should originate in the country we are in.(I've just realised what that film was called.
Goldilocks. Goldilocks and the something something. Temple of Doom. Goldilocks and the
Temple of Doom! I knew I'd get it in the end. )
• 4 bottles of local beer
• 4 bottles of Pom brand pomegranate juice (see illustration below)
• 10 16oz plastic cups
• 4 wine glasses for Red Wine• A corkscrew to open wine bottles, unless the wine is in screw top
bottles, in which case can we change it for bottles with corks.
• 2 bottles of smooth, full-bodied, Bordeaux type red wine. Probably French.
Something we've heard of, but still can't pronounce. Look, there's fucking loads of good red wines.
Ask the man in the wine shop. Or here's a number of suggestions:
1st choice - a Medoc, St. Emilion, Pomerol, or Pauillac, years '86, '89, '90
(It wasn't Goldilocks and the Temple of Doom, was it? How annoying!)
2nd choice - a Barolo or Barbaresco '89 or '90
• 4 large laundered towels.
• 24 large paper napkins
• 1 box of tissues
• 1 medium sized trash can, disguised as a potted plant.
See? Not all that bad, is it?
Catering Requirements (contd)
Dressing Room Two for “and The Stooges”
Here is a difficult one you get you started. Rice Dream milk substitute. It is made out of rice.
Which is why it's so expensive - think how many grains of rice they's have to milk to get just one
liter. I mean, grains of rice are very very small, so imagine how incredibly tiny their udders must
be. Put it this way, they are more likely to be featured in Milk and Milkmen magazine than in Huge
Juggs or Men Only...
Did you know that over half of the world's population depends on rice merely for survival. I bet
they would love to wash it down with a big glass of cow's milk.
We don’t actually want this. I just put it in for a laugh.
So anyway, let's go.
3 cases x 12oz (small, say, 50cl) bottles of still mineral water. Good quality. Doesn't have to be
French, though.
3 large bottles of good quality sparkling water. And 5 large bottles of poor to medium quality
sparkling water, for me. Again, un-French is good. Unless we are in France, in which case - what
a marvellous country. So let’s say, about 8 litre bottles of sparkling water. That Italian stuff’s
• 1 Litre bottle of distilled water. I’m not sure what this is for. Maybe putting in an iron? But we
don’t carry an iron.Spooky! I know it’s illegal to distill your own whisky. Can you get into trouble
for distilling your own water, I wonder?
• Some cans of Coca Cola. About two will do. Or maybe three. I think it's disgusting stuff. Like
McDonalds predigested sandwiches. Do you know, if I had to choose between a McDonalds with
coke, and having my tongue ripped out and placed inside my colon, I'd probably be licking my
own arse right now...
•Some cans of assorted sodas. Ginger beer? Dandelion & burdock? I don't know. Lemonade?
• 4 bottles of Gatorade sports drink - any flavor except 'gator. Or ades.
• 10 Bottles/Cartons of Coconut Water. De-husked
• A bullet with my name on it. Well, you can never be too careful, can you?
• 1 x Litre of Ocean Spray Cranberry juice.
• 1 x Litre of fresh-as-can-be Orange juice.
4 cans of sardines, in a little pile.
3 baguettes (ie loaves) of fresh crusty french bread. Like what they sell in France. Unless you
happen to be in England. I which case, soft, stodgy, and absolutely nothing like they sell in
Some Marmite. Apparently, if it’s in a squeezable container, you have to keep it upside down. I
don’t know what happens in Australia. I suppose they make Vegemite the right way up. Or you
have to take Marmite with you in your carry on bag, and turn it over as you cross the equator. If
you can’t find Marmite, I’ll settle for Natex, Vegemite, or Genovis.
Catering Requirements (contd)
1 packaged container of sliced ham carved directly off a pig's bottom.
1 packaged container of sliced turkey shaved from a turkey's breast.
1 packaged container of sliced roast beef cut from the flanks of a roasted cow.
2 packaged container of sliced cheese pared from a lump of cheese
1 Jar or suchlike of good quality hot mustard – like Lowensenf Extra Hot Mustard
1 bottle of extremely hot pepper sauce so that no one has to actually taste the sliced ham, turkey,
beef and cheese that's come out of the packaged containers.
• Kettle chips or chips artesanale or hand-made chips or.... Do you know what I mean? Real, old
fashioned, proper potato chips.
• Cauliflower & broccoli, cut into individual florets and thrown immediately into the garbage. I
fucking hate that.
(Nearly finished now. I think I could do with a rest. I've been on me feet all day. No, really!
Somebody stole all the chairs out of the office. Bastards!! I need to put some more of those folding
chairs on the rider.)
• Some crackers. And some dips, such as hummus and guacamole.
• Nuts. Assorted nibbly things.
• Bombay mix, if such a thing is available in your area.
• Lots & lots of clean ice. (Not ice that a polar bear has been standing on, with its big mucky feet.
Polar bears are still bears, aren't they? Not pigs, like the panda.)
• And then lots more for after the show. Ice, that is. Forget about the panda.
• Plastic cups, assorted sizes, suitable for hot and cold drinks. At least one sleeve of 16oz solo,
and some little ones. Does anyone outside the U.S.of A. understand what this means? I don't, and
I wrote it.
•18 large bath towels. Not face cloths. Towels. Nice and freshly laundered too, not new with
labels still on them.
• A copy of the New York Times. A recent copy, if possible. In fact, today's would be nice. Come
to think of it, not a copy. An original.
1 case (24) of big bottles of good, premium beer. You decide. But remember, I might ask you to
taste a bottle, so buy something nice!! Here's a clue - it's probably won't start with "B" and end
with "udweiser". Unless it's Czech.
• 6 bottles of “Zywiec” Polish alcohol free beer
• 1 Corkscrew & bottle opener with which to open many bottles
• 1 nice bottle of Chablis. That's a type of wine. Not just an ordinary wine that's dressed rather
Chablis. (Does anyone actually understand this joke? I might as well take it out if not)
• 1 bottle of full bodied red wine like a Bordeaux or Rioja.
• 4 wine glasses
Dressing Room Three for “and The Stooges Crew” no smoking room
I think that's about it. No. wait...
• A brand new Triumph Tiger motorbike for me would be nice. To keep. With a full tank of petrol
(that's gas, if you're American. It's a liquid, though. I don't think they have thought this one
through, do you?). And a motorcycle helmet, full face, size medium. This is actually the most
important thing on the rider, so please don’t forget it.
Or maybe just
• A GOLF CART, should one be available, to make it easier to get around the site. Well, it’s
easier than requesting a horse and cart.
Dead Dog Island
By the way, if there are any Reality TV executives reading this - hardly likely, I
know, but - here is my idea for a Reality TV show.
It's called 'Dead Dog Island', where a group of contestants / dog lovers is asked
what is their favourite breed of dog, then whatever they reply (for example,
'Poodle'. Or ' Labrador') they are then presented with a dead dog of that particular
breed, which they have to cook in a number of different ways, say about six or
seven, and then eat it all up over the course of the next oooh... two weeks or so.
But just to make it a little more difficult and sort of gameshow-y, all the knives
are blunt, and they have to wear a pair of those enormous clown trousers, made
out of wood or something, so that they can't quite reach anything. Well only just,
The first person to completely eat all his (or her) dog, and not be thrown off the
island by the public for being too pleasant, or maybe unpleasant, wins another,
live dog of exactly the same breed. And pots of money. And free dog food for life
(of the dog).
This all would take place on some romantic tropical island somewhere, so it
would all be very visual and make really super telly.
Maybe there could be a celebrity version, with currently out-of-the-spotlight
celebrities in it. Does anybody know if Cher is a dog lover? I think Stevie Nicks
probably is.
Oh, and no sicking it all up into a bucket every night when the cameraman goes to
bed. That would be frowned upon...
Pre - Production Rider / Check List
These are just a few details some of which have already been mentioned in the now very famous
and well-written rider by Jos Grain just to make sure nothing is overlooked plus a few introductory
requests. This check list should be read at least 1 week before arrival and again the day before
arrival. For the current rider you should be reading it. This is the most up to date rider information
and should be looked at just in case you are working from an old rider which seems to happen
quite often these days.
Please distribute this rider to all relevant staff.
Can we please make sure that Iggy’s monitors (wedges) are off the front of the stage on flight
cases, or such like sturdy supports and strapped to the main stage construction or better still if a
bay can be built to accommodate both wedges. He likes to be able to stand in between the
wedges, looking at the audience in a funny way, so some sort of platform for him and the wedges
would be ideal. (insert picture???)
2 sets of stairs to stage height, with handrails and lights stage left and stage right (when
applicable) We mention this already on the stage plan page but just in case someone missed it.
(insert picture???)
Iggy & The Stooges will always enter on stage left. I know it’s crazy, but it’s just the way we like
to live our lives. Please accommodate this at all times and write this into your final plans.
Please keep stage left clear and free from any obstructions and that includes any guests, liggers
or such like people who have no business being there, from 30mins before Iggy & The Stooges go
on stage until 30mins after. Only relevant working stage personnel who have business there
should be there; please station one security guard at this position to work under the supervision of
the Tour Manager!
Can you please arrange a secluded quick change room large enough to accommodate a small
table and 2 folding chairs on stage left side?
Any guests/artists on stage should be kept to a minimum and on stage right only please in some
kind of sheep pen of sorts. Probably best if you take the sheep out first.
It would be advisable to post signs and have your security advise no cameras of any sort on stage
unless agreed in advance. I am sure you will agree this will keep unnecessary, ongoing
annoyance and time wasting for band, stage and security personnel, there is nothing worse than
having to tell people through out the whole show to put their cameras down and stop taking
pictures as well as becoming very unpopular in the process, it may lead to some unpleasantness
and unnecessary injuries.
Camera platforms and other camera positions to be agreed in advance (when applicable) again
see rider.
Please have at least one large trash bin at stage left and one at stage right.
Stage Drinks – Please have at least one case (24 small bottles) of still water and 24 towels
available and given to Jos Grain at changeover.
Dressing Rooms and Production Office
Tour Manager/Production Office. At least one direct telephone line plus ADSL or Wi Fi with
relevant ID/Passwords if applicable. water/soft drinks, chairs, tables, 6 medium size towels, A/C
power, keys to the room and waste bins.
The Band Dressing Rooms. Each to have:
Chairs, sofa, tables, clothes rail, hanger rail with hangers, full length mirrors, toilets, showers,
wash hand basins, heating/air conditioning, curtains, soft lighting, power, keys and are as per
detailed rider.
Towels. 40 towels (4 Large in Iggy’s room, 12 large in band room & 24 medium size for stage).
Please have dressing room area in a fairly quiet and secluded part of the backstage whenever
possible with private toilets in close proximity if not within dressing rooms. Area should be
screened off whenever possible.
Please have 2 security personnel posted at dressing room access, in some occasions I am sure
we can work with one but this can be agreed on the day if need be.
Please have security and stage manager close down stage left access 30min before Iggy & The
Stooges performance and remain closed for 30mins after to allow a fast and safe stage clearance
change over. We do understand this could vary according to conditions.
There will be other security issues to be dealt with on a day-to-day basis and mainly relating to
stage activity, this will be explained once on site and there should be a daily meeting between
your head of security and Charney Marshall, our Assistant Tour Manager.
Barrier should of be Mojo standard and built as close and as legally possible to the stage.
Large Sedan (Mercedes S Class type) with blacked out windows for Iggy + 2 persons.
2 MPV type vehicles with blacked out windows will be required, 1 for band party (5 people) & 1 for
crew party (5 People) + Baggage van for all transfers (Baggage van required only for
airport/hotel/airport transfers) although a certain amount of cases will need to be moved to/from
hotel/venue/hotel. For airport arrivals, please have all vehicles parked as close to arrival door as
possible. No schlepping through multi storey car parks, this should be avoided at all times. All
finer details regarding day-to-day vehicle movements can be discussed nearer the date. Drivers
should be competent, English speaking, not talk continuously (not at all would be preferable).
They should be coherent, not smelling of or drinking alcohol at any time, no smoking in the cars,
using mobile phones to a minimum whilst in the car. NO MUSIC playing in any of the vehicles.
Drivers should have a good knowledge of the local area and particularly the routes they are
driving us to/from, do not get over excited/star struck, do not turn around to look in the back of the
car whilst driving and most importantly have done this before. Name and mobile numbers will be
required at least a day before touring party arrives in the country. Please advise drivers not to ask
for autographs to Iggy Pop directly whilst in or out of the car. Anyone meeting us anywhere
(airports, train stations etc.) needs to have a sign to identify themselves to us. This sign should
read GDLLC (unless otherwise instructed). No personal or band names to be on any boards.
On a final note can you please makes sure drivers have small bottles of mineral water available in
all vehicles for all journeys.
Please do not leave anything to chance, if you have any questions please contact as necessary:
Henry McGroggan - Management
CEO – Office [email protected]
Tel +48 22 894 6035/ 6036
Fax +48 22 894 6037
[email protected]
+48 502 319 595
UK +44 7860 212 569
EFax +44 709 228 1693
Jos Grain – Backline/Stage Manager
Tel/Fax +44 207 916 3276
Mobile +44 79 70 55 20 67
[email protected]
Charney Marshall – Assistant Tour Manager
Mobile +61 401 334 966
[email protected]

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