Feminism and FemininitY:

CHAPTER
5
Feminism and FemininitY:
Or HowWe Learned to StoP Worrying
and Love the Thong
JENNIFER BAUMGARDNER AND AMY RICHARDS
stage of
The second wave wasn't funny. There was no humor. It was an earlier
there's
that
think
feminism. we were breaking barriers. lt was so new, I actually
to be
going
it's
think
I
movement.
going to be a much more piofound feminist
rePresst
be]
won
feminine.
the
fearing
not
[It
iery-different-rery my.tiial and
ing but really inviting the feminine.
-Eve
Ensler, author of The Vagina Moruologues
by the
For the last decade, young girls in the United states have been told
Meanbold."
and
smart
organization Gi"rl"s, Inc., to be "strong,
"dro.u.y
giant Nike;s memorable ad iampaign tells-girls and
it., *.ui.,
*t
,.Just"do it." And most girls raiserl in the wake of the 1976
*o*"" to
Fiee to Be...You and Miwere told by parents-and teachers,
b*";ii;
iyoo
girls to
can be whatever you want." These sound bites challenged
li
how
rise to their potentialj-which girls certainly did, as witnessed by
they
when
president
be
to
want
they
s-ay
play
and
sports
many of them
mesthese
Confused because
;;;; "p. nut ii alsoieft them confused.
prov-iug", Uolea down to integrating thems_elves into a male world and
of
progression
is
a
it
thlngs.-lile argue.that
in! rf,.y could do
-us.rlfn.
ilpi"(* that younger "third-wive" women (and men) are embracing
( xfotet.Fas.yell as power.
rlogurrr were responding to second-wave feminists, who
)%rai.r.
a seli-esteeri boost. The second-wave femigirt;".eded
pr;;;;i tfrrt
59
60
o Feminism and Femininity
Richards
Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy
nists based theT pllumption on rheir memory
of what it was rike to be a
girl in the 1940s, 1950s, and 1960s. In marked contrast
to today,s girrs,
these girls of yesteryear were protected rather
tiru, .fruU.rrged, and
restricted rarherrhan encouruq:d. The worrd i"
*rri.nirr.y;.;;;;
deprived them;1f.a1cg1s,to mare iirings and e"roi..a
tr,.i, iurti.ipation in
female grings, This reft them to urr.,ri., and thus pro,,,oi.,'rl"
notion that
',good girl" you had to master i,uoy tt i'jr.;
fi,"i'girr,
should do
l:,b.
?
rhrs while rejecting femininity. Go to work) pray
lpor*, beiough, but donit
do it white rroli:,g nail poli'sh, pink unifoii;,;;
,;;;;;.-prizing work,
sports, and strength.are good and essentiar
-.rrug., ror glrr-*e need to
have access to what is chiracterized as boy,1u16-J6li",
F.*i"iru we have
to address the other harf of this *.rrug.i what does
it *.u" to be a jiri
today? And, more narrowly, what message
are we sending to girrs and biys
about the value of femininity?
Before
.11.1o!*er that question, though, we have to ask, How are
we defining "girl"? Do we mein those p.ead"oles.ents
who are climbing
trees an_d playrng with Barbie? or do wehean
those g.o.,,r, *o-"n on sex
in the city whoin their independence, their bonds"with
f.*"t" friends,
and their love of feminine faihion invoke a ,"nre
o].ternJgirrhoodi we
mean both. Further, as we wilr discuss rater, both
.t uii."s.'r.cond-wave
feminists in ways that have distorted
ih;;;;ro", rur* feminist
received wisdom) on the topic of girls and girries.
rt.rJ ii
whe,
it comes to the lives of young girl"s becausJ tn.y ur" ro ,"ai'.rrry
"Jlaousy
different
*"
f"-ilrt
from what older womer,.r,pi.i.n.ed.tvleanwhir",trr.
on among the carrie Bradshaws and Bridget
"ffing that goes
Joneses in pJputar curture
and the real women who cail themselvesi,gi.r,; i, irrr.ui.ii"g
because
female power still gets translated as how well we
can attract men. It isn,t a
specific constituency that we need to address, uritrr.-.rr.nce
of what it
"
means to be a girr-or girrish,o_r girlie-not tt p"rro"
p*r.**g
ri.'^-'
-j
.
As we wrote in. our book twaiif6niWngvio*rr,
"
iiinx*, and the
Future (2000), what we are cailinsigirr$" is tt,ir i"t"^..tion
of femi..cirffir;;;;";;;;;;..",
nism with feminine culture.
that our
desires aren't simpry booby traps set by'the putriu..rrv.
cirte encompasses the tabooed symbors of women's heminine
.".rtirrrutron-Barbie
dolls,. makeup, fashion ma gazines., I,igh heels_;;;
*y, ;; g them isn,t
shorthand for 'we've been duped.t uJing makeup isn,t'a
sign 6f our sway
to the marketplace and the male.gaze;it can b!;c;#;y,
ironic, or
simply decorating ourserves with-out the loadedirl"o-airo,
what we
loved asgirls was good and, because of feminism,;;k;;;;i;"k"
girl stuff work for us. our Barbies had jobs and ,.*
ti* u"Jcompricated
relation-ships with friends and family.'sticker coflections
were no more
trivial than stamp collections; both pursuits cultivated th..o.r.roisre.r.
in a young person.
"while it's true that embracing the pink things of stereotypicar
girlhood
isn't a radical gesture meant to overrurn tt..uy"*.i"iy;;;;*"d,
it can
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61
wearing 'Girls Rule' T-shirts
be a confident gesture. When young women
Le Sportsacs from junior
and carrrrng'Hello Kitty't""tt' Uo"it dust offthe
polish, it is not a totem
nail
1,ij1,-;ifili1hem with blacklipstick and green
i""r" i"irriirired
culture
but inod to our joyous Yfuth' You[8 *:T:] uI'
to what some temrnlst roreemphasizing our real personal lives in contrast
to
way
the
;;',i;;;;;"iicipateaif,eir lives woutd-or should-be: that
In
femininity'
pink-packaged
of
forms
aII
eoualirv was to ,"i..t S;rbi" and
motrgirlies'
#idfi,igr,, a that which once symbolized their oppression,
"queer"
men in chelsea .utting each other
urr"d *omen using the term 'nigga""
, 1 .1
(and_their forethe ,irgf.n".ia embraced 6! these girlies
;;il;#-rlong
the
il;;;i;"y
oi Ufu.t -..,
Girlhood,like
Brown)' is
t".t ", for*.?-ii'mopolltan ediior Helen Gurley
invokes
S.aroyan
T'f" writer Strawberry
more a state of being ,h;;;gt'
,"",fr.tt,
"I now believe,
itself'
friendship
9Y1
when I recall not."Iy;h;;;tt oioot
girlof
idea
the
it's
and
mind'
my
to
there's one thing that keeps springing
I
and
tf,ut I believe that both Natasha
this sense when describ]rrg h"."ai."dship with Natasha:
friendship
hil.
Y;;;
b"t
iiiiaro"il;ih;';i'
liri"; ;;; som" timt in our lives-our
had that we were
trying to become some Persott yI9 *u' ui*o'i
iiJuarj,,wt.r
we,re
rJi"!
twenties-and
mythical.t"
"l::::1
girrie, it,s because we feel independent, irrever-
this could happen at nine or ninety'
Citft tongs and adult women throw parties to
rt.. f.o*;"Jt*?f,i-u"a
.ri,
tirrt" girls sing
Itfn.r,"ra
iii..
mom,
and future.
*^
"arr"*.nt-is
\
'
Siin the Clry or.host Madonna partieg'
celebrate this season's rii."'[t
"f
into'.Prizing' acknowlit's this fierce, tun ird;;;;;;;t inty are tapping
sphere' being a
domestic
the
it
;;i;;,^;;;;r"irg th.l ftminine"-be
within the scope of feminist history
or a talent ror
cl"l"
are arSurng
tt at girlie is associated with qualities feminists
for-why, then,
is
it;;i;;i;ilrpreted
as
suth a rejection of.feminism?
lured by
becaut;;i;;;it;i"i"ts fought for women not to be
sugwhich
culture
of beauty
feminine trappings. itt.y *""1"-a an anatlsis
vacuum
one's
in
solely
lie
not
sested that fulfillm."ii""r, tikely does
as gui-
In part, this
is
ffi;;il;;;l;;,
*".trry of male colleagues,_whether
from the 1960s until today
tarists or astronauts. The feminist movement
could be valued in
:1.#,
ages
dfi;;;;y;;.d,.b "f ;;:;ti"s that females of all pioved
that we weren't
Feminists
society for more til;;;;;#appeal'
overlooked in this
nt"t"ftiiping' b.yt what ihey
*o*t'-weie "taken seriously" is that some
;;;;;;t of ..,r,riing1hut drawn
to feminine things.(i'e'' "unserious"
women-and men--ure
being
;;;;ti. B.y""J that, ieminine things weren't truly the problem;
so hard for all
hardwired to b.
goJ
ut
forced to adopt th;;;;. S.l."a #*" feminists
to the goodin
{i{1Ltay claim tended to be
women not to tr riuiriit
"!i'f"-tf'ey
niche
that
fil
aia
being a girl. (The *;;;; ortnJti*. wno
joys of home and hearth
anti-feminist, Iik P;;iiit itnf "np preaching the
and nonfeminists alike
feriinists
from her executive
foughi
"ff,;;:ilil;lrf,"tfy,
Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards
62 r Feminism and Femininity
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63
with a mixed message: Girls might have the potential to be
powerful, but girl things assuredly do not.
Older feminists have identified this degrading of feminine and female
traits, of course. Cultural feminists of the 1970s even tried to create a glmocentric alternative lifestyle, glorifring women's ways of doing everything
from talking to sex. Why, then, is there such resistance to accepting girlies
and girlishness as part of feminism? (For the moment, we will limit our
analysis to girlie feminists and address the issues and conflict prompted by
"real" girls later.) This brings us to the real nerve that girlie exposes: one of
young women rebelling against mothers. As we wrote in Manifesta: "In the
same way that Betty Friedan's insistence on professional seriousness was a
response to every woman in the office being called a girl, this Third Wave
generation is predestined to fight against the equally rigid stereotype of
being too serious, too political, and seemingly asexual. Girlie culture is a
rebellion against the false impression that since women don't want to be
r sexually exploited, they don't want to be sexual; against the necessity of
{ brass-buttoned, red-suited seriousness to infiltrate a man's world; against
\ the anachronistic belief that because women could be dehumanized by
I porn, they must be; and the idea that girls and power don't mix. The probJ t lem wit|-ff,iqrebeltlon is that it further concretizes the myth that older
have been left
*
f,eminis
1s
fatecl-]err
u][ *
"r,." in girlie doesn't help the situation, either.
J ForThft{nsumeris}plnherent
so m)ry<5gco$dzwavers, feminism was linked to socialism-or at least
to critiquing capitalism. They were fighting a patriarchal system that
maintained itself off the backs of women. They were also adopting the
politics of the time to incorporate women. Many of the influential secondwave feminists were "red diaper babies," meaning their parents were
Communists. Today Communism is a humbled force and women participate in that capitalist system as much as men do. Younger women, who
have grown up with increased access to the "good" parts of capitalism,
have begun to ponder the fact that asking women to opt out is essentially
I
I
i
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I
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asking them to choose to be marginalized. Young feminists came of age in
a much more disposable and capitalistic time than did their second-wave
predecessors. Many young feminists do not take rejecting consumerism as
their major organizing principle, which is often read as rejecting feminism. (Not so. People tend to fly now rather than take the bus; it's not a
rejection of middle-class or working-class values. It is simply what people
do now.) We are not arguing that capitalism and clothing can't be politicai.
Who makes your clothes and under what conditions is highly po-litical. But
when there is a critique of girlie-feminists and their clothes, the point is
rarely the plight of sweatshop laborers. The butt of the critique is usually
the young women espousing feminism while wearing Gucci. Defining
girlie is too often expressed by what young women wear (miniskirts!
lipstick!), and thus what gets focused on is the accessory, not the content
of the person wearing it.
distinct feminist identity is
The ascent
of whaidifferentiates third-wave feminists
probablv one of best
"*'umplet
specific-ryt of
fr;fi;:"J-*"* i.*i"ilis. We see third wave not as abuilding
feminism
qS::
*t"*pti""t or theories, but as an evolution of
riot grrrl, Spf^ce
,i"", i"".r"ions. And where does that leave us? We have
CirL, i"aigo Girls, Girl Power, gURL'com, Rockrgrl' ty.bttg1l' q"T-q::
All Abou_tlthe
Ciri, i"ai"Jrrrl, "New Girl Ordei," and even this collection,
the wlord
appropriating
wavers
third
of
e;;i;;;;;e just a few examples
come
into
have
terms
these
Although
giri; *iit i" a feminist cont'ext.
and,
girl
stuff
this
about
c*larity
for
need
a
still
is
usage, there
of feminism'
"3**r"
;;;;;;.trJudly, why there is a need for a-third wave
We Srew uP not
time'
feminist-influenced
in
a
up
grew
Younger women
within and
iust witlifeminism,-but also with critiques of feminism-from
b?11'ry-Ti.tl
were
we
when
*,ir."i1ir," pto*'.iuiut backlash)' Beciuse of
the right to
;;;"" .u., iuk" certain freedoms for granted-namely'
access to
sports,and
play
to
freedom
.froor" whether to have a child, the
and the
Court
Supreme
thl
as
such
;;;;i"t;;1y *rl"-o"Iy institutions
chagrined
are
feminist
older
though
and
tiitft.igt't,
U.i. et*y. This is o.r,
to abortion
ut'o,ri ..rrr. of blithe entitlenient, they want us to have access
Nonetheless'
and sports, and that is-in fact what they fought so ha'4.for'
entitlement is-a mark of their success. If we
;; i;;il;;**J,#;;r
;pl;t;p;rts, why don't *e? In other words' why be a girl if you don't
of the "girl"
as a strong and
have
' - to?
o"".'"r,ne first third-wave
feminists to theorize formally ab-out girlie
*urp.UUi.Stoller,afounderofBustmagazineandauthorofaforthcompages of Bzsr, in its
ins book about knitting.-iio1.r'r theory Is aII over the
simpli66 -11-yourser uiuni patrern, ard can be
f;
-i,ott"t
-* ;'f
d"u"r.d that v9 u 1\outdn,'- l-"',:': *"k'
iri ir g"" a :'
"
ro*"ifrfig maiculine in order to make it valued by t"-tl::':l1J1"t'*'
-Ihrs mrgnt mean
should brlng feminine things into masculine spaces.
meeting. We also
;;i"ri;* onel nails a"ii"g tfi. coffee break in thi board
canning vegetaand
knitting
tike
il;;;"r;;. truJitio"uUi female skills
in preserving
believe
not
did
Stoller
bl., o, decorating. frrit[.t*o'e,
up the girlie
opening
in
also
but
women,
these feminine traits;;;a t";
features men in sensitive or
;;;:; ;;;;;t;t't.;'pect. Bust resu.tarlr theory
is- that it can be pred'om.stic u..rrurl O.r" weakness of Sfoler's
a
r*tpii;;, too, leaving one with the impression that the only way to be
soodthird.wavefemini*istobesuperfeminine-thereverseofwhat
(glorifving
;it#;r^;rhtilJ
*
i,;ffi?; t; th;;;iy
male roles)
*itf,
thirdurroi'ft.r (giorifying traditional femininity). The
wave goal is to present
to express
;;;"p1"
ie70s. We can'i replace one set of rules
."ig. rrom"*r,i.t, feminists
can feel comfortable
whether "girlie".isnt just an
.i--- -L^-^-..
AT":ifilY?11:
"
themselves.
;iilloestion
i;*i"i'i'
reallv is aboui onll.whT"'Sld11:,
about Manolo Blahnik's
"";
class "ii;;;i;;;;;?;i,",
women. Or, ,utfrer, tir"y *iff ask if worrying
Richards
Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy
64 o Feminism and Femininity
and vibrators could possibly have relevance to a woman escaping genital
mutilation in Kenya or an illiterate girl in Afghanistan. "Is it really something you can take to other parts of the world?" we are often asked, as if the
two of us are trying to sell Aboriginal women baby doll tees; Girlie certainly has its limitations, but there is proof of its appeal and power around
the world and in many disparate communities. Remember the women in
Afghanistan sneaking lipstick, something forbidden to them under the
/taliban? Another example of girlie being international is the acceptance of
lThe Vagina Monologues as a cultural event in countries as contrasting as
in the
\Kenya and Afghanistan, as well as on hundreds of college campuses
IJnited States.
Within the United States, The Vagina Monologues has magnetized
younger women toward the women's movement and is a great vehicle for
getting at the complexity of the third wave. The play simultaneously calls
for sexual freedom and satisfaction for women (Eros and equality), and
advocates for worren not to be silent about the sexual violence in their
lives (human rights and safety). During the show, women wear miniskirts
(and look fabulous and happy, sery and proud) and simultaneously claim
it as something they own-they say "no" as a girlie stance. They say "no"
without the armor of masculine or conservative clothing that women have
been told they need. Women who perform The Vagina Monologues understand that feminine things, such as feather boas, hearts for Valentine's Day,
and fancy dresses, aren't political in and of themselves, but the girl wearing
them can be. And the girls doing The Vagina Monologues certaihly are
politically active: they raise money to fund local anti-violence projects,
speak out about taboo subjects, and say "vagina" in polite company-a
radical act in itself.
A third-wave feminist approach to girls and girlies takes into account
sexism and a second-wave feminist critique. The third-wave analysis of
girls and girlies acknowledges that four decades of feminism have altered
the prescription to "be a good girl" into the philosophy that "girl is good."
This girlie-girl is still entitled to critique beauty standards and consumerism. Feminine accoutrements do not disqualifr her. Too frequently, many
of the young women we meet on our travels to college camPuses might be
attracted to these articles of femininity or consumerism, but they analyze
that desire from the perspective of others: as a conflict and a potential
compromise of their feminism. They make their desires suspect for the
sakc of a popular feminist critique. They render invisible their own.examplc as a f'eminist who happens to be attracted to girlie things, or consider
thcmsclvcs the exception to the rule, and everyone else a Britney Spears
wiuutit-bc.
Whilc the manifestations of girlie theory have momentum now, its
roots go deeper than Stoller, just as girlies were once girls. In the early
1980s, Carol Gilligan, one of the mainstays of the girls' movement focusing on girls ages nine to fifteen and a leader of second-wave feminism,
r
65
argue that women
attempted to address how she herself could politically
them'
against
biases
emotional
own
her
have
;;;;;6;
"-Eiffig'"", lo *.rr, but
the lack of
to
reacting
specifically
was
iurrura pty.f'tf"gitt,
"
even when women were in
women's voices i, rt"r'nJta. shZ noticedihat
a male discourse' She
what she called a t,r.nu., conversation, it was still
perpetuated it.
ia."rin.a ,rris problem and ack rowledged that she herself
toward the
women
ii"..6ilfg"" i"utir.ainutshe was heliing to socialize
and
women's
in
which
one
natriarchv. she set out; ;ake the conversition
conto
women
asking
than
;;;;T;;i;.; could be equally valued, rather
form to an aPProved male dictate'
good' Gilligan was
In other words, tonjiefore Stoller was saying girl is
it is to force
*ul&du"t
on
r"rrdii;;; t"it.r.o',.u.t'-girls.to 9k9 it's the same than
hijacking of selfthem into ,,"r.oaypr.ul i.-uit toftt; in fact'
Barbies' qink' eye shadow' and
hood and autonomy.;d;h;" Ciriles claim
part
ut o".ttt, blue, combatboots' andsports' thaCs'all
b.
il"td;.
^ "Aia golh are attempting to put girls'
of the resistan.., too.
;;ii;"J;;;hai
them-into
t'voi..es"-broadly
girls like, think a6out, talk about' and what moves
the human conversation'
detailed in her
initial.rponr. io Ci[igu"" '"search' which was the negative
a-ccentuated
mostlv
b;-;;[i;; aooi, tr"i irff":a;t voice,
The
U.i"g u'boy' tqil *11 tire case'of a second-wave analysis
approach identifies
being appliea to tt ira-r,r,u1'" girls' The second-wave
third-wavt
A
freedom'
tt'ot"
u'"
!i'*
sexism and the *uyt uiyt
"Pl:.Tl\
extrapolate so PYth \
would include the po#er thai girls have today' not
being.invisible to being
shot up in the wake of Gillivulnerable. In a way, ,h#;l;' movement that
reactio; to theories like Stolgans research *irrorJ-s[me of the feminist
aspects of not
tlirT.",i*
no confidence that the individual girl or
guise of helpinggirls and
girlie knewwhat she;";;"g:Th"' ""d"' the
inadvertently mutes
movement
keep their voices, the"women's
ler's: in both
instanc;,h;;;*",
i;;;;"
them.
'..rr,i'Ieftthethird-wavegenerationconflictedaboutwhoth_eyweresupposed to be or, more
ilp;;;ti,
what feminists would "allow" tnt11:""r|";
was no,longer;tl"
The barrier to irraiviiuuiity and individual expression
oatriarchv" that hobbled the second wave' but Jemmrsm.\u.19: 'oP toPs
mtdrrfi-Darrng
lldet feminists who didn't understand youne women's "voice" (which we
of
loss
or thong ,r.rd.r*"ur;. Eilligun'' solution to"the
to form strong
i",.ipt.? as self-knowledgelcreativity, and self-worth) was
boards for
sounding
are
women
relationships with oth","women' Wiien
they will
argued'
she
monolog"e5'
ufn.*i.r! their interior
"':'ll:
one another,
;;-,i;;;fii.r."
u'J centrality to eventially
change what society
women come together to pervalues. This is exactiy what happens when
*nt" women feel like they have found a
form The Vagina tutiro'tigu"',
friend whiie ieading the pages of Bust'
fi
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Iennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards
66 o Feminism and Femininity
Today we see the girlie/feminist conflict pray out mostly
among coilege-
age women and young professional
*o*.rl
Many of the young *l*"r, *"
meet (or exchange E-mails with) as we travel around trrJ.o"it.y
are into
the,ideals and goals of the women's movement, but trrey re"r
it at they
can't be both themselves and. a feminist. rhey arrume t'rrui
rr*i"g u"i,
"weakness" for femininity disqualifies them fiom
being u ie.rrinist. rh.
personal decisions they make-havin g boyfriends,
rrr"u"i"sl Brazilian
bikini w.ax:s, getting. married, wantirig to huu" ;t"d, iii.? C*y".rf,
Paltrow, being into faihion-lsnvs others"to assume that
tirey are dupes of
the patriarchy. Aren't these the trappings or remininiiy-irr"iir,.r,
morhers
(or women's studies'.professors) rejectdt? But
the ru.ti"trrut u.yond these
p-ersonal dilemmas, these_young women are organizing
the take Back the
they are demariding that they 6e
with
I,fl]:-"*les,
me Doys and they are being whatever they want to "bi;ilpl"y,ports
be.
Man!.estayas w_ritten in pirt to address exactly thar crowd,
.'^O^:1P3O
ol"r
who say "I took the women in Mass Media class-why do I stilr
:h",
Ieel the need to wear high heels? Am I weak?" This question
is tlearly on
the minds gf y.oy"g feminists. We have no doubr tir;tt;;";;women
connect to feminisrn's idears. wb see them living feministiives
Sxemplified
by their righteousness and sense of entitlement.timilarly,
trr"y ur"Lrpir.a
by feminism's history when they have the opportunity to
learn about it.
what they often don't have, however, is a sinse of howto be a feminist.
They aren t clear about what feminism requires from them,
Is it about how
many petitions one signs? Or showing up for marches3
Or reading the
feminist classics? often, too, they perce"ive'that their
iiu", u.a.r-
p".;;;;
mine their political convictions. ro top it off, they
ini*,rie-irrir*
as what they can't do (Don't beboylcrazyl Don,t"n1,"
shave!), ,utt.i than a
I
l pnuosophl that sirows them the potential for what they can do.
ulany.of these young wo[len are like Brooke, whom we met
at the Uni_
versity of North carolina at chapel Hill. Brooke, after
notingii. i.urrr, or
baby-sitting services or, .u*pur ior employees and students
and the abundance- of potential srudent wbrker bees, wanted
to ror- u ffi-riiiirrg r.rvic-e through the university. she saw a barrier and
thougt iil'wrrut .u, t
do? Am I allowed to make these things a feminist
islue without the
approval of the 'feminists'?" In other w*ords, if it was ,".t
u gooa ia.u,
wouldn't the real femi'ists-the ones who invented v-Day
o,.loir.d ,.*ual harassment or wrote the books she was reading-wourdn't
they rrave
already thought of it? In Manifesta, Kathleen Haina (co-creator
of the
n,'ovement known as riot grrrr) cails this nagging, nai-saying
'.rn"
uoi..
Phantom." The phantom siys, ..Someb oay alia{y tfr.'"ghi
oitt ui. So*._
body already wrote that b9ok. ]u9! glom onto ,o*"o.r"
plurr.;;
The feminist Phantom is the "fe-minist mystique." If ""1r",,
the fd*irrirr. *yrby Betty Friedan) is enforced iatisiaction with child rearing
l'_q1",!.o-:d
and
domesticity, the feminist mystique is the attitude that made us
fee'i
guilty for embellishing ourselvei with girlie things. worse, the
fe-i.rist
.
mystiqueleavesustoassumethatthefeministlabelbelongsonlytothose
*iro hav. sorted out all their issues and are no longer conflicted about
men, sex, their bodies, their incomes, or fashion'
-s.exism and
iir" ,"uro, the phantom has so much power isn't just about about
what
talking
time
much
si
to* r.tf-.rt"em. It's also that we spend
learn so
i.mir,ism was and not enough about what it can be' Because we
take a
needto
we
say'
they
what
than
do
p"oil"
much more from what
around
we look
,"p;;;k fr"m rhetoric'and^put the focus.on acts. When
*t:Illll'^:
are
they
what
than
rather
dting
ur"
*o-..,
at what young
zmes
creatmg
are
clear thai theri is a feminist continuum. Young women
are
they
Protest0*r liU.,h. second wave created Ms' and OffOur Backs)'
not to
iirjnut. crimes (just as their foremothers withheld income tax so as (movprofession.
every
flooded
*,;il;t the Vietnam War), and they have
s^econd wave, which gave us the first
the access prouia.a bI
i"il.y""a
f.il"fe
t"
Supreme Couri justice and the first.female astronaut)'
whar this leads us i6 i, tt fact that girls today-both the ten-year-old
"
with skinned knees and the thirty-five-year-old with the vibrator-possess
could hardly imagine'
u fr..do* and fierceness that women in the 1960s
1960s
That is a poignant reality for the-freedom-fighting. femilisls gfthe
weak
are
girls
that
*J f SZOi, uid th.r. i, ,irpi"" of pain to the'ir criiiquein future generations
are naive. It hurts to see ihe manifestations
"rllrii",one has lorrg"Jio, for oneself. The feminists who implored girls to
need to
"t
"iit
smart, urrJ bold" got what they wished for' Some still
be "strong,
to
younger
perhaps
And
i.."g"ir""inat trr. wish-ca-"i,ot'
YoT-"l.r,t"d
to
them
imploring
women'
oider
with
shurl som" of their entitlement
"just do it" and be "strong, smart, and bold'"
Notes
l.StrawberrySaroyan,GirlWal|'sintoaBar:AMerloir(NewYorkRandomHouse,2003),182'