2016-05 Parenting Christian Kids
Transcription
2016-05 Parenting Christian Kids
May 2016 To subscribe or unsubscribe to his newsletter, contact Paddy at [email protected] Haney Presbyterian Church 11858 216th Street Maple Ridge, BC, V2X 5H8 604-467-1715 Church Administrator: Marilise Venter [email protected] Associate Minister: Rev. Paddy Eastwood 604-720-1810 [email protected] Minister: Rev. Dr. Gerard Booy 778-868-1548 [email protected] Take the “Chore” Out of Household Duties POWERSOURCE ASK GOD: 1. To help your children be willing, eager contributors to your family. 2. To give your kids—and you—a good attitude about doing chores. 3. To develop in your family members a heart for service. In a recent national survey, only 28% of parents said they require their children to do chores—even though those parents realize the importance of having household responsibilities. “Parents today want their kids spending time on things that can bring them success,” says Richard Rende, co-author of Raising Can-Do Kids, “but ironically, we’ve stopped doing one thing that’s actually been a proven predictor of success—and that’s household chores.” Chores also help children develop much -needed life skills and instill in them a sense of self-worth and belonging. Most child-development experts say kids shouldn’t be paid for household chores, which are part of contributing to family life. Summer—when homework isn’t in the picture—is an ideal time to rev up your family’s chore assignments. Here are some examples of ageappropriate tasks your kids can perform: Ages 3 to 5: They can work alongside you to put away toys, place dirty clothes in a hamper, sort laundry, make their beds, and feed pets. Ages 6 to 8: Children can dust and vacuum, put away their clothes, empty wastebaskets, set and clear the table, and help with some yardwork. Ages 9 to 12: Kids can load and unload the dishwasher, unpack groceries, mop the floor, fold laundry, wash the car, and help prepare meals. Add Excitement to Chores For many children, chores imply drudgery. But that doesn’t need to be the case! Use these tips to make chores a positive, productive experience: Give kids ownership. Enlist your children’s help in selecting chores, as well as the consequences for not doing them in a timely manner. Teach tasks with “shaping.” First, let children watch you perform a task while you explain it. Then let them try one step at a time. Use language cues and offer encouragement. Say, “I see books on the floor” rather than giving orders. Thank kids for their efforts. Spur teamwork in your family by using the fun ideas below! TEACHABLE MOMENTS Team “Work” Have family members line up, one behind another. Choose a leader to stand a few feet in front of the line and face the team. Have the leader throw a ball to the first team member, who then throws it back to the leader and stoops in place. The leader then throws the ball over the stooped player to the next teammate, who throws it back to the leader and stoops in place. Continue this way until the last team member has the ball. That person then carries the ball to the front and becomes the leader. The previous leader goes to the front of the line. Repeat until the original leader becomes leader again. Afterward, ask: How did our family work as a team in this game? When do we have to work as a team in our home? at school? at church? Read aloud Romans 12:5-6 and close in prayer: Dear Jesus, thanks for each member of this family. Help us work together to serve you. Amen. Terrific Teamwork Designate a time when everyone chips in around the house. For example, do chores at a particular time every Saturday morning. This reinforces the importance of each individual’s contributions. Whistle While You Work Play a favorite upbeat music CD while children complete their chores. Also, have kids brainstorm a new, more creative name for chores, such as “home fun” or “household helpers.” Responsibility Roulette Mix up the chore routine by letting family members randomly select their tasks for each week. On slips of paper, write all the chores that need to be done. Then place them in a cup or jar. Every Monday, have family members select their jobs for that week. Lend a Hand Make a creative chore chart to keep your family organized. Have family members each trace one of their hands on card stock and cut it out. Use markers to decorate the paper hands with a ring, a watch, or a bracelet. Attach a small self-adhesive magnet strip to the back of each handprint. Then place a sticky note on the center of each hand, and have family members list their chores for the week. (Help younger children.) Place the hands on the refrigerator, pointing downward. As family members complete their chores for the week, have them point their paper hand up to show that the tasks are done. Each week, replace the sticky notes with new lists. Church Chores To show children how to extend the skills they learn while doing household chores, consider lending a hand at your church some weekend. Watch the church calendar for a designated “work day,” or just ask a staff member what tasks need to be done. Your family can clean out a closet, paint a room, organize pew racks, or straighten out the nursery or library. Work and Rest Divide a long sheet of paper into seven sections, writing one day of the week over each section. Together, create a mural illustrating the different work and activities you all accomplish each day. Complete six days, leaving the Sabbath blank. Afterward, read aloud Exodus 20:8-11. Brainstorm different ways of resting on the Sabbath. Then choose how to make the Sabbath a special day for your family to relax with God and one another. “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord, rather than for people.” —Colossians 3:23, NLT MEDIA MADNESS MOVIE MUSIC Title: X-Men Apocalypse Genre: Action, Adventure, Fantasy Rating: not yet rated (likely PG-13) Cast: Jennifer Lawrence, Rose Byrne Synopsis: Apocalypse, the original mutant, has wakened from his slumber to find a world he despises. He recruits a group of powerful mutants to cleanse the world of humans so he can reign as a god. Our Take: Although Marvel movies have often been innocuous, fun, and action-packed, this one introduces something more sinister. In one trailer, Apocalypse says, “I’ve been called many things over many lifetimes.” One name he lists is Yahweh. So be wary about this movie. If your kids do see it, have a meaningful discussion about who is the one true God. Title: Faster Artist: Group 1 Crew Synopsis: The Christian hip-hop group’s new EP trilogy includes the digital mini-albums Faster, Stronger and Power. The five-member group, which has been around for almost a decade, had a radio single with the song “Forgive Me.” Our Take: This pop-infused band offers upbeat lyrics and melodies that make listeners want to get up and dance. The song “Everyday Is a Miracle,” which features Christian singer Rachel Lampa, emphasizes the beauty of life. “Time flies. Yeah, we only get one life. What you gonna do with it?” the chorus asks. Older kids and preteens will enjoy this positive alternative to secular hip-hop groups. CULTURE & TRENDS Tablet Takeover More than 80% of U.S. children now have access to a computer tablet, and the number continues to grow. Experts predict that toddlers’ tablet capabilities may become one way to gauge their developmental stage. (huffingtonpost.com) TMI? In an effort to make the subject of menstruation relatable to young girls, a new doll from Lammily comes with “Period Party” accessories. The doll also includes an informational pamphlet so parents can launch discussions about the topic. (people.com) QUICK STATS Games, Sites & Apps Star Fox Zero This 3D scrolling shooter video game features animals that engage in aerial combat. Players can see the view from the cockpit of the Arwing spaceship. The rating is still pending, though previous installments in the franchise have ranged from E to E10+. TuxPaint.org This site offers free opensource drawing software for kids ages 3 to 12. As users access a range of drawing tools, their computer literacy improves as well. The software, which is available on multiple platforms, is also being used in elementaryschool art classes. Kids Trade With this free app, school -age kids can trade toys, clothes, and other items without money. Registration is required, and parents must approve trades. Users post a photo and description of each item. The app helps kids learn about tradeoffs and decision-making. This page is designed to help educate parents and isn’t meant to endorse any movie, music, or product. Our goal is to help you make informed decisions about what your children watch, read, listen to, and play. Bookworms Keep these stats in mind for summer reading: 90% of kids ages 6 to 17 say they’re more likely to finish a book that they picked out themselves. And 70% of kids say when reading for fun, they want books that make them laugh. (The Kids and Family Reading Report) Tech Timeout When asked which of their kids’ behaviors is most difficult to control, 23% of parents said “limiting technology-based activities.” Parents struggle more in that area than in getting kids to eat healthfully, go to bed, or do homework. (actionforchildren.org.uk) Thank you! A heartfelt thank you to our Friday Night Youth leaders: Paddy Eastwood, Ricky Newberry, Laura Newberry, Amanda Lambert, Susan Reaveley, Jeff Pinck, Ewert Jansen Van Rensburg, and Janet Eastwood. May SUNDAY 1 MONDAY 2 3 WEDNESDAY 4 8 Mother’s Day Worship and Sunday School 10 am 9 10 15 Pentecost Worship and Sunday School 10 am 22 Trinity Sunday Worship and Sunday School 10 am 29 Worship and Sunday School 10 am 16 Pentecost Monday Ascension Sunday TUESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY 5 6 7 Garage Sale 9-12 noon 11 12 13 HPC Family Retreat at Camp Douglas 14 HPC Family Retreat at Camp Douglas 17 18 20 21 23 24 25 19 Bible Study in the nursery 10 am bring your children 26 27 Youth Mini Retreat at Camp Douglas 28 Mega Work Party and Youth Mini Retreat at Camp Douglas 30 31 In Other News... Save the weekend of May 27-29 for the Youth Mini Retreat and Work Party at Camp Douglas! Spend time with your friends relaxing, playing games, singing, doing devotions, and having a blast at Camp Douglas. The youth will join in with the Annual Mega Work Party on Saturday the 28th, and chill on Friday and Sunday. This is not an event to miss. Canada Youth is coming up! July 5-10 at Brock University, St. Catharines, Ontario. Visit http://presbyterian.ca/cy2016/# or speak to Paddy for more information. To check out the opportunities at Camp Douglas, visit http://www.campdouglas.ca/ Work It, Kid... Work It! By Tony Myles Out of all the jobs that have to be done around the house, which are your favorites? That’s probably not a question you feel as prepared to answer as if you were asked to describe the chores that you’re tired of doing. It seems easier to talk about the tasks we feel worn down by than the ones that bring us life. “I’m pretty sure I have more laundry to fold than there are clothes in the entire world” ... All complaining aside, you likely have a few chores that feel satisfying when you get them done. That short list is perhaps only trumped by another one of tasks that light you up with pride and joy when your kids actually do them. Maybe you want them to clean their room, feed the dog, dump the garbage, clear the table and invest into the yard… even though they want to play, read, eat cereal, sleep in and harass their siblings. Or do they? Everyone takes care of their household differently. Usually it tracks back to whatever agenda and priorities were created when someone (perhaps you) decided which chores everyone would need to pitch in on. Maybe that’s the real disconnect – when one person wants every other person to do something, there isn’t as much ownership as when those other individuals get to contribute to the process. So if you had the chance to add one more task to regularly do together as a family, whether or not everyone enjoyed doing it, what would it be? And, perhaps as important, if the rest of your family members were to answer that question, what would they say? Consider Creation itself as a template: God gave Adam and Eve the opportunity to have a job, care for creation, be united to each other in marriage and parent. Each of these things by themselves requires a lot of effort, but all were a gift from God that humanity was given some kind of creative ownership of: Adam named all of the animals, including his wife Eve; it’s implied that Eve picked out the names for her sons Cain and Abel. What are you allowing your kids to have creative ownership of? Here are some actions steps to inspire kids to help out around the house with some brainstorming activities to invite their input–which is the first step to ownership. Brainstorm…a MAIN LIST: Instead of telling kids what to do, involve them in making a general list of all the household chores that need to be done each day. Point out what might pile up into tomorrow if they aren’t done today, such as dishes, trash, laundry, picking things up off the floor, cooking, getting the mail and so on. Brainstorm a PERSONAL LIST : Help them see the value in personal hygiene tasks like taking a daily shower, brushing teeth, changing clothes, making beds, and so on. This is also where you can note the things that you do because they matter to you, such as turning off lights that are left on, putting food away before it spoils and resupplying the toilet paper if it runs out. Help them see the things they enjoy doing because it matters to them. Brainstorm a SPECIAL PROJECTS LIST: Note the things that that need to be done on a weekly, bi-weekly or monthly level, including sweeping the garage, dusting, wiping down the windows, vacuuming out the car, decluttering a desk and grocery shopping. Brainstorm a LIST FOR YOUR LISTS: Seriously. Look at all of your lists and circle a couple of things on each one that each of you will take ownership of. The end goal isn’t to just accomplish the task, but to have fun doing this together and with God. Turn up some music, whistle or catch up on life as you invest into this. See if you can turn this into an act of praise and worship. Work is work… but it helps to remember that it was around before sin came into the world. Humanity was intended to find a unique fulfillment in chores, and through Christ we can redeem this in how we view it as a family until the Lord’s return. It involves being thankful that we “get to” do these things instead of complaining that we “have to.” Perhaps we’d see God more clearly if we clearly saw his gifts as blessings and not burdens. Article courtesy of Lifetreefamily.com Storypath Book Reviews The Secret Birthday Message by Eric Carle Written for ages 4-8. Related Readings: Acts 2:1-21 At Pentecost, the Holy Spirit came down as a gift of love from God. When the Spirit filled the people, they began speaking in languages so that they could all understand one another. Everyone was confused, but Peter addressed the gathering and reminded them that God had scattered everyone for God’s purposes and is now regathering them so that they may all know of and tell of God’s love. Pentecost is considered the birthday of the church, and is a day of great celebration in the church. Pentecost ends the season of Easter and reminds us yet again of God’s love for us, and all of God’s creation. The blessings we receive from the Spirit are to be shared freely as they are freely given to us. In Carle’s book, on the eve of his birthday Tim receives a cryptic message which, if he follows, will lead him to his birthday gift. Tim follows the instructions (and so do the readers through pictures and differently shaped pages!) to find his way to his gift…something to love and care for. Pentecost is a reminder to us, and to the original apostles, that we are loved and God is always present with us. The Spirit can’t be contained, as we see in the Pentecost story, and neither can God’s love – what we receive, we are to give as well. Likewise, Tim will now be sharing lots of love with his birthday gift! While the message itself or the medium of the message might be cryptic, the meaning is clear: God’s love is to be celebrated and shared. This short video may help re-introduce you to the story of Pentecost: https://youtu.be/J5tr4pqWIo4. Review by Katie Barrett Todd. You Can Do it, Bert! by Ole Konnecke Written for ages 4-8. Related Readings: Romans 8:22-27 Bert is a bird on a big mission: today he will jump from the tree into the water with the rest of his friends. He’s prepared, but suddenly at the last minute he’s hesitant. His friends call for him, encouraging him to follow through. Finally, after he jumps he realizes that he can do it and goes for another jump along with his friends. Sometimes we, like Bert, need extra encouragement to fulfill our plans. God, who knows our hearts and minds, allows the Spirit to help us and intercede on our behalf. Review by Katie Barrett Todd. Let There Be Peace: Prayers from Around the World by Jeremy Brooks Written for ages 5-9. Related readings: Romans 8:22-27 Comment: This text serves to remind us that often are prayers are an expression of a hope not yet fully realized. Indeed, prayers may be groans, sighs, breaths taken, or words exhaled. This book of prayers collected by Rev. Jeremy Brooks express what it is we are hoping, groaning, sighing, praying, waiting for: a world of peace, creation as it was intended to be. When we’ve exhausted the words in this book as well as the words of our hearts, when we find no words remain, may we be comforted that our hope will forever be expressed through the sighs too deep for words of our ceaseless intercessor. Review by Noell Rathbun-Cook. ALL THREE BOOKS ARE AVAILABLE IN FRASER VALLEY REGIONAL LIBRARY. Camp Reflections by Janet Eastwood (with thanks to Sarah and David Fowler) I am firmly convinced that Camp Douglas is one of the most important missions the church supports within our presbytery. Camp Douglas, in case you have never been, is located just a ferry ride away on the Sunshine Coast. The property is ten acres of field, forest, and waterfront. Campers come for a week at a time during the summer. They make friends, sing songs, do crafts, play games, and sleep in cabins. Like our church, however, which is not made up of the building but the people, Camp Douglas is a ministry not because of its physical features and natural beauty, but because of the dedicated Christian community that gathers there every week all summer. Camp is a place where children and teenagers can experience a community of love and acceptance. It is a place where daily you see glimpses of the kingdom of heaven. For some children, their week at camp is the first time they hear the gospel. Camp is the first place that God’s name is more than a swear word, and the first place they hear that Jesus loves them. This love is made tangible in the kindness and warmth of their leaders and cabin mates. Other children come to camp knowing all the Bible stories. They love God already, and camp is where they feel safe asking the big questions, like, “My dad doesn’t believe. What can I do?” During the nightly cabin devotions, campers put their deepest questions to their leaders and, in studying the Bible and talking together about faith, get a glimpse beyond the world we see to the unsurpassable wonder of God. A few summers ago, my cabin of 10-12 year old girls asked if they could lead that night’s devotions. I sat on the cabin porch while three of them selected a passage each from the Bible and prepared to explain it to the rest of us. Not everyone in the cabin was ready to take on that leadership role that night, but every girl, devotion leader or not, encouraged the others in studying and discussing God, and paid close attention while her peers taught. Needless to say, devotions ran well past lights-out at that night. Lives are changed at camp. I can name three teens, later staff members, who grew up unchurched in nonChristian families and chose to be baptized at Camp Douglas because it was at camp that their faith was planted and nurtured and so flourished that they publically committed their lives to God. You’ve probably heard the saying, “God works in surprising ways,” and it is true. You probably also know that when you add together kids, the outdoors, and summer camp, you should expect the unexpected. What is never unexpected, though, is God’s presence and God’s work among God’s people at Camp Douglas. From morning chapel to noontime bible study to evening campfire to nighttime devotions, each day at camp is structured around prayer and worship. Prayers are answered. Camp is a spiritual highlight of the year, a time and place when people draw closer and open themselves to God. Camp is a concentrated, powerful experience of living in Christian community, when each member is committed to building up the others to the glory of God. This is a transformative experience. It is also a discipline that can be taken back into the wider community of church, school, and work. I remember a chaplain whose Bible Studies introduced a variety of Christian disciplines. She encouraged us to choose one and practice it for the week. One of these disciplines was to become more aware of others and of God’s work in and through others by recording each day three observations about someone else. At first it was difficult. It is easy to be so caught up in your own experience that you don’t notice what is significant, challenging, rewarding for the people around you. Gradually paying close attention to others and responding to their needs – rejoicing when they rejoice, mourning when they mourn, consoling and encouraging and praising God together – became more natural. It is easier to see God in others when you are actually paying attention to others, and looking for God. Another great thing about camp is that there is never any shortage of role models. Both as a camper and as a leader I made friends with people I would never have met, much less gotten to know well, otherwise, and found in them examples of Christian love. There’s Cheerio, the director, who notices when someone is feeling overwhelmed, and makes sure the workload is fair and everyone is involved in the fun. There’s a camper who came with a sprained ankle. He participated when he could but when he sat on the sidelines he was just as much a part of the activities as his cabin mates. Rather than mope over all the things he had looked forward to doing and now couldn’t, this camper modeled gratitude and cheerfulness. There are countless staff members who demonstrate over and over again loving self-giving, trustworthy examples of a Christ-like character. Added to all of this – camp is just plain fun. Camp is a wild and busy place, filled with exciting activities, friendships and laughs. A variety of activities and goofy games like capture the flag in the forest, kayaking, and appearances from costumed characters make camp a fun place to spend a week or a summer. However, it is the sharing of the hope of the gospel and the living out of God’s love in a Christian community that make camp a truly special place. With the continual rhythm of prayer and worship, we never have an opportunity to forget that God is at the center of it all. At the end of the summer, we can’t take home all of the campers, staff and fun activities. What we can take home is this rhythm of continual focusing and refocusing on God. Please keep the ministry of Camp Douglas in your prayers.