TOGETHER FOR GOOD By Carol Stowe

TOGETHER FOR GOOD
By Carol Stowe
A Novel
And we know that God causes all things to work
together for good to those who love God, to those who
are called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28
TOGETHER FOR
GOOD
By Carol Stowe
And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to
those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.
Romans 8:28
Copyright ©2015 by Carol Stowe
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any
printed or electronic form without permission.
Scripture quotations contained herein are from the New American Standard Bible, copyright
©1971, Creation House, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois, All rights reserved.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the
author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or
dead, business, companies, events or locales is entirely coincidental.
Dedicated to Margaret Stork, wherever you are.
You inspired me with that first red Big Chief
manuscript tablet. It has taken more than 50 years,
but I finally did it!
Carol Stowe
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CHAPTER 1--LAURA
The thought of being a foster mother had been with her for decades. Somewhere back in
high school the idea had taken root in the recesses of her soul, but while it would simmer it never
really came to birth until much later. Life had happened.
She was born an only child but definitely was not raised as a doted prima donna that the
stereotype might indicate. Her father had been a very successful traveling salesman who was
gone so much that he never established a bonded relationship with her. He provided financially
well enough but was always away on a business trip when the important events of her life had
happened. Eventually he had hooked up with one of the probably many girlfriends he’d acquired
during the lonely nights on the road and then relocated to another state leaving the family
financially in about the same boat they had always enjoyed with his absence being only
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marginally noticed. Moderate if inappropriate gifts for her had arrived from him at her birthday
and Christmas until she graduated from high school and probably until child support was no
longer mandated. After that she really never knew what happened to him. Like him, his siblings
were not into the family thing, so no one ever really tracked the family tree.
Her mother had taken good enough care of her. She was always fed, well clothed, and
privileged to reside in a fashionable, upper middle class house in a safe neighborhood. She had
been a good student, so support from Mother with homework had never been needed.
“Mom, I have been assigned a science project, so I am going to need some poster board
and a few other supplies.”
“Just add them to my shopping list, Laura.”
If she needed special school supplies for some assignment or another, she would simply
put the need on her mother’s list, and they would appear. So it went. Abuse? Certainly not. Or
was it?
Her mother and father had never laid a hand on her, not in the punitive sense, not in any
sense at all really.
“Laura, that is not how a young lady sits. Laura, don’t forget to make your bed neatly.
You really could do a better job of hanging your towel on the rack. Don’t forget to brush your
teeth and floss each tooth carefully.”
She was never spoken to or treated harshly but never touched affectionately either that
she could remember. No one played with her, shared experiences with her or took an interest in
her deepest thoughts, interests or concerns. It was just a stoic, flat existence.
“Not now, Honey, I really have work to do. You know I am not the outdoors type, so
maybe you could find a friend to throw a ball with you. There are a lot of other children your age
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in the neighborhood. You are a good reader, so you don’t really need me to listen to you read
your book. Just follow the directions on the cake box, and you’ll do fine.”
She wondered if her birth had been an accident.
Her father had made enough money that her mother had not had to work at a paying job
outside their home. Since Mom had not been a career woman, she had found her fulfillment in
volunteer causes. She had been very active in her political party and had volunteered almost as
much of her time in non-election years as in the years a new President was making his bid for
office. Mom had spent her days either doing telephone work from home, raising money for the
newest candidate or referendum or preparing mailings for same. Then there were her animal
rights concerns, yard beautification projects and global warming issues. There had been other
matters of importance to Mom as well, but the girl had never really known or understood them.
Once Laura began school, more time had been freed up for her mother to expand her interests out
of the house into surrounding regions.
Oh, Mom had baked, and the girl had been allowed to share in the yummy home-baked
wares, but the bulk of the confections had always gone to fund raising efforts and refreshments at
rallies and such.
“Mother, may I try one of those chocolate chip cookies? They really look and smell
wonderful.”
“Certainly, Laura, but just one. I need the platter for the rally, and I need to get them over
to the convention hall before noon.”
The girl had really never known or understood all the causes, issues, or places that took
her mother from her. She had just known that they were important.
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Fortunately she had been provided with really good, loving teachers who had given her
the encouragement and life guidance she had needed. She had adored the many pretty ladies who
had shown an interest in her, spoken to her, worked with her, praised her and had even touched
her. They had patted her head or shoulder or sometimes her hand. Their touch sent warm, lifegiving surges through her entire being. She had willingly done anything indicated for these
instructors and sought any way to get their kind attention, so she was a successful student.
“Laura, I can always count on you to have your book reports in on time, and you almost
never miss one word on your spelling tests. You are the type of student a teacher loves to have in
her class. Do you need some help with long division? Here, let me show you. Divide, multiply,
subtract, bring down, repeat. Just continue that pattern, and you’ll have it.”
With a smile and a shoulder pat, the teacher had been gone, but Laura had been aglow.
She had been taught at home to be socially appropriate and had become reasonably
popular. She had girl friends to play with in the neighborhood as long as they lived close by so
Mom did not have to provide transportation. She had others to play with at recess and later to eat
lunch with in middle and high school. Occasionally she had been allowed to walk home with one
of her friends to play together after school or hang out when she was older as long as she had still
been able to walk home in time for dinner and not need a ride from her mother. Sometimes her
girl friend’s mother had picked both of them up at school and taken them to their house for the
afternoon. Wow, what a special mother!
“Sure, Mom would be glad to drive you home before dinner. That way we can play
longer. She hates for you to have to walk all that way home. Maybe you could even stay for
dinner. It would be dark then, but she would be happy to drive you home later on.”
That type of family dynamics puzzled Laura greatly.
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The summer she turned sixteen and got her driver’s license, her parents had agreed upon
getting her a reliable used car. That was one of the few times they actually talked to each other,
but since that expenditure was significant, they had to agree to the cost and particulars. That car
was in no way meant to spoil her. Rather, it was a way for her to fend for herself even more and
require less of them as parents, but it opened up a whole new life for her.
No one had ever given her any spiritual guidance or training to any significant extent.
There had been a couple of teachers who had suggested that there was a Supreme Being, an
intelligent designer and God who loved, cared and knew all about her. They had indicated that
He was all knowing, all powerful, and everywhere, yet personal enough to know. That really
caught her attention. Without really choosing it she had a strong, somewhat magnetic pull to find
out more about the abstract, spiritual side to life.
“I want to check into this whole God thing. I think I will to go to the library and research
all the religions of the world and mentally decide which one seems best for me. Libraries must
have all sorts of books and information on how people around the world practice their faith in
whatever god they understand,” she reasoned to herself.
Oh, contraire! The God of the universe had other ideas for her.
From seemingly nowhere but providentially guided by God, a girl who had been at
Laura’s school for years suddenly became a new friend to her.
“Hey, Laura, how did you do on that science test? Mr. Talley always gives such hard
tests. What did you answer for that question about the layers of the atmosphere?”
They chatted at lunch about teachers, tests, and television. Neither was really into the
boy-crazy schema.
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“Can you believe how Glenda and Marta ogle over those boys over there? I’d rather get
on the A or AB honor roll than have those bores hanging around me all the time. Agreed?”
“Yeah, maybe someday, but for now I’m more concerned about that history project
coming up in a couple of weeks,” Laura insisted.
Getting a good education was the high priority to both of them, but this new girl
interjected words into their conversations that Laura was familiar with, but her friend used them
regularly in her speech in a new way, words like faith, believe, trust and obey.
“Right, Laura, we just need to have faith that God will provide the right guy at the right
time, when He is ready. I just trust Him to lead me as long as I obey Him.”
Laura realized how her heart somehow accepted and craved more about the spiritual side
of her friend’s life. God was at work.
“If you are far enough along on that history project, would you like to join me for church
on Sunday? My folks would be glad to pick you up and take you back home afterwards.”
When her new friend invited her to join her for church, she found herself accepting, even
eagerly. Where had that come from?
In ways she did not understand she immediately felt like she belonged in that new church
environment. The building looked inviting, not foreboding. The people looked friendly and
accepting regardless of age, ethnicity, or background. The warmth she felt when the pastor,
youth director and others she was introduced to had looked at her, really looked at her fully in
the eye, was a sensation that was new to her but something she realized she craved.
“Hi, you must be a friend of Andrea’s. Welcome to our church. We are so glad to have
you. I’m sure Andrea will show you all around. There is lemonade over there in the church
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kitchen. There is also coffee for the adults, but I’m guessing lemonade might be more to your
liking.”
The staff member affectionately tapped Laura’s shoulder as he shook her hand, then went
on to the next group of people to welcome them as they entered.
The music was very different but somehow special, moving something inside of her that
she did not know existed. Andrea and her parents really seemed to get into all of it. Andrea
showed Laura where the words to the songs were, but she just had to wing it on the melody.
Praying was also a new experience, but she liked listening to how these people seemed to
actually talk comfortably to that Supreme Being like He was an old friend but a powerful force
to be reckoned with at the same time. She watched how Andrea’s family and the whole
congregation bowed their heads and closed their eyes while they prayed. She took that cue to
bow her head also, but she kept her eyes open to check out just what was going on.
Then came the message. Everyone got really quiet, and a lot of them opened books that
Laura later found out were called Bibles. Of course, she did not have one, so Andrea shared hers
then showed her some copies the church had for visitors underneath the seat in front of her.
Laura actually was interested in what was being said. She felt like the man in the pulpit did not
notice anyone else sitting before him except her. Everything he had to say seemed to be directed
only at her. He was bold but compelling. She could not get enough.
Her mom didn’t refuse her participating, so Laura continued to visit church activities with
Andrea, and she even joined the youth group. She began attending a teen, home Bible study with
Andrea. Her mother didn’t mind because the more time Laura was gone, the more time her mom
had for her special activities. Over time, Laura came to realize that tremendous tug on her heart,
on her soul, was the working of the Spirit of that amazing God who had sought her out. She had
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not had to go searching for Him. Gradually, yet not overly so, she felt a longing to have what
others in that amazing place had, a very personal relationship with that all knowing, all powerful,
all loving God who had provided the bridge between herself and that perfect God Himself
through his Son Jesus Christ. With a yielding that was much more controlled by Him than her,
she opened up her entire being to Him and became a devoted follower of that amazing God/Man
Jesus Christ. She became a Christian!
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CHAPTER 2--MONTY
After that nothing changed, but really everything changed. School was still school. Her
father was still gone. His financing still arrived. Her mother still had her causes, but Laura
herself was different. She still attended most church events with Andrea and her family. It pretty
much amazed her that Andrea’s whole family attended their church’s activities, all except youth
group, of course, but they were always glad to drop both girls off and pick them up again. She
realized that she really was loved and special to God.
“Mom, you know all the times I go to church with Andrea? Well, her church is not just
for kids. Lots of adults go too, and I really like what goes on. It is really good, Mom, and the
God they sing and teach about has become very special to me. I have learned how important He
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is not just to me, but to everyone. I now know that I need Him in my life as my best friend and
Savior. Would you come with me sometime and check it out, too?”
When she had shared her newfound faith with her mother, the reply was simply, “That’s
nice, dear. Whatever works for you is fine with me.”
Laura came to understand now that this new relationship with her heavenly Father was
where her worth lay, not in her academic performance, but she also came to see how much sin
had played a part in her seemingly good life. She had never participated in big sins. No drugs, no
booze, no sex, no crime, but she had lied, been proud and envied. She had needed a Savior as
much as the mass murderer did but like a loving daddy celebrates each small victory of his
precious baby girl, her loving heavenly Father was much more about celebrating each step of
faith and obedience she learned rather than chastising her for each failure.
When she would be envious of Andrea’s family all going to church, not like hers, that
small voice of God inside her would remind her not to be jealous and to leave the future in His
hands. When she would get mad at her dad for always being gone, God would again remind her
not to judge her father and leave him in God’s hands. When she would get puffed up that her
name was almost always on the A honor roll at school, that Spirit inside her would remind her
that her academic ability was a gift from God and she was not to take pride in it as if it were all
her own. It was all about forgiveness and humility. She had been forgiven. She should be
forgiving of others as well.
She learned in church about a whole multitude of new causes that before had evaded her
radar. These were causes her mother had never noticed. There were entire cultures void of ever
having heard the message of the love of God she had been blessed to hear. There were starving
children in distant countries and not so far from home. There were girls and boys lured into illicit
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sex trafficking all over the world. Children were living in horrible conditions of physical,
emotional and sexual abuse that tore at her heart. That was where the seed to nurture these needy
children first was planted, but she was a mere teenager herself. She would try to develop that
new skill of praying for them, but what else could she do?
Her idyllic life proceeded, nothing extravagant, but nothing tragic. She continued
attending church with Andrea’s family or sometimes driving herself.
High school ended. Her mother actually attended her graduation ceremony, but then
declined any graduation party in Laura’s honor.
“I’m really proud of you, Laura,” sounded empty and scripted, but Laura tried to
appreciate the words anyway.
After much research on her own with little support or interest from her mom, Laura found
a college that seemed to suit her and went away to that quality university continuing to pursue
her valued education. Her academic advisors suggested a degree plan focusing on her math
aptitude even though long division had given her some challenge! Andrea had chosen another
school much further away, but fortunately in her new college town Laura was able to find
another wonderful church with a different style of music, a younger minister who gave even
more dynamic messages and many more youth her age but still the same, loving God. She
gradually connected with the other college students there and slipped in Bible studies when her
studying time would allow it. She was sure though always to make the Sunday services.
Laura returned home less and less often for visits since her mom showed little interest in
having her there. Laura developed more reasons to keep her in her college town on weekends
where friends of like belief values and getting a good education were the norm. She wondered if
her mother even noticed.
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Then she met Monty, and oh, what a difference he made in her life! He came from a
family like she could only imagine. He had several siblings, some older, some younger, in
various stages of education, working, marriage and family. His parents, though both gainfully
employed, made it very clear through word and deed how important every part of their family
was to them. Monty was an engineering student seriously planning his future career, and most
important to her, he really loved the same Jesus Christ she did. She had met Monty at church in
one of those college Bible studies. That made attending the studies even more important to her.
They began dating and quickly realized what a good match they were for each other. Here was a
young man she could give her whole heart to. While still disciplining themselves to devote
adequate time to their studies, they managed to pursue their relationship with each other and
looked forward to making a life commitment to one another once they could put college behind
them. When weekend or holiday trips came along now, she found herself joining Monty on trips
home to his family. Laura’s mom hardly noticed.
“Mom, I have met a really wonderful guy at school, well really at my Bible study, who is
a good student from a good family and really loves God like I do. I hope someday you can meet
him.”
“That’s nice, Honey. Yes, maybe one of these weekends you could bring him here so I
could meet him. Just keep your focus on your grades. Getting a good education needs to be your
first focus, you know.”
“Right, Mom, I know. I’ll see if we can arrange a trip some weekend.”
Her mother returned to the task that consumed her attention, barely noticing Laura’s
information.
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Laura came to enjoy and even love Monty’s parents, his sibling, nieces and nephews.
That surely was what family was supposed to be like.
“Thanks for bringing me here so often, Monty. Your family is really great. I guess I never
realized what I was missing.”
“You know you are always welcome here, Laura, and not just by me. All of my family
things you are special, too.”
Laura and Monty did arrange a weekend visit for him to meet Laura’s mom. He came to
see first-hand how pleasant the woman was but how disinterested and disconnected she seemed
to be in Laura’s life and certainly in him. She was gracious enough but also cold enough to make
him wish he had brought warmer clothing even though the weather outdoors was really warm!
While they were there Laura’s mother continued her regular commitments hardly getting to
know her daughter’s boyfriend at all.
College graduations arrived, and then Monty and Laura decided to be married. They
chose to celebrate their wedding commitment in their shared college church instead of either’s
home churches in order for their friends to be able to attend. Laura’s mom and all of Monty’s
family flew in and stayed in local hotels to celebrate the couple’s union. Laura’s dad had other
prior plans. Monty’s family took advantage of the celebration to incorporate a family reunion
into the affair and spent almost a week there. Laura’s mom caught a flight back home as soon as
she could graciously disappear after the ceremony.
After a magnificent one-week Caribbean cruise for their honeymoon, the newlyweds
settled down to begin married life in an upscale apartment complex in north Dallas with easy
transit access to Monty’s new job as research and development designer for a nationally known
technology corporation. Since Laura had always loved school, especially math, she had gotten
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her degree in finance which was a logical career path for her. Finding a banking job in Dallas
proved to be no difficulty with her credentials and the financial climate in Dallas. The thoughts
of yesteryear regarding fostering needy children slipped almost out of sight.
Their utopia continued with career advancement for both, soon accruing sufficient money
to purchase a lovely home in a new neighborhood in North Dallas, stylish but not extravagant. It
had four bedrooms, one of which would be an office, a large family room with a double fireplace
that ventured into the master bedroom as well. There was a large, formal dining room and a
kitchen-breakfast room combination that was warm and inviting. They knew that area would be
the focal point of most of their at-home time. Monty insisted on a triple garage because although
they only needed space for two cars, he hated having to squeeze the lawn mower and other yard
equipment into a narrow space beside the cars. They purchased adequate furnishings, two new
mid-price cars and enough toys to enjoy life without letting themselves be controlled by them.
The couple located another wonderful church after some time in carefully choosing one and
became part of a great network of devoted Christian friends and church activities. They joined a
young couple’s home group Bible study that met weekly. Monty’s family visited often, Laura’s
not so much. Laura’s mother’s endeavors took her further and further away, even overseas.
Finally the couple decided they were financially stable enough to follow in the footsteps
of so many of their dear friends and begin a family. Pregnancy did not follow quickly, but after
more time than either of them wished, the blessed event happened. How thrilled they were! Plans
for decorating that spare bedroom blossomed. Cute arguments over whether to pursue a pink or
blue décor theme ensued but were quickly negotiated to a yellow teddy bear motif. They even
started a small college investment fund with seed money that would provide for or at least help
when their child or children reached the point for higher education. They shopped for baby
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furniture but decided to hold off purchasing any right away. Half of the fun was in the shopping.
Laura really could have gone on a bit longer before needing to wear maternity clothing, but her
excitement would not allow it. She shopped the trendy maternity shops and purchased a few
conservative business outfits that would allow her to play mommy but still not look out of place.
These would suffice for a time until further baby growth would necessitate more serious
maternity wear and baby supplies. They were content for now with only decorating the bedroom
for their coming baby.
Doctor visits proceeded on schedule with everything apparently developing on course.
The exciting sonogram was finally scheduled for the following visit. At last they would know
whether the precious bundle Laura cradled in her womb would be named Mason or Amelia…or
both as so many of their friends teased. Laura’s obstetrician’s office used a sonogram machine
and technician next to the doctor’s office wing in the adjacent hospital, so on one appointment
before Laura saw her doctor, she and Monty, who certainly joined her for the landmark event,
stepped into the smaller treatment room for the painless procedure.
“I have no idea, Monty, just what to expect, do you?”
“Hey, you have more experience in this department than I do, you know!”
“I just can’t wait to see the images of our baby and maybe find out if we are having a boy
or girl. Friends have told me the images are pretty fuzzy, but I am so eager to see the pictures.”
They did not know just what would happen, but they eagerly awaited seeing the indistinct
images that would be displayed on the screen of their child. Their baby! Oh my, what had
seemed mysteriously, dreamily surreal up to now was about to take on more reality than they
could handle. When had they ever experienced such anticipation!
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At last the procedure began. The gel was applied to Laura’s rounded abdomen, and the
operator went to work. Laura had never met the attendant before, so she did not know anything
about her personality, but she would have expected someone who worked doing such an exciting
procedure to be a bit more effervescent than she was. At first she was nice enough, if businesslike, but she never seemed to come out of the somber, almost cold demeanor she displayed. The
couple began to see images appear on the screen, but they had no idea what those shapes were or
what they were looking for. Then calmly with barely a word spoken, the tech excused herself and
left the room. Confused, they wondered if it was time for her coffee break!
“I wonder what that is all about. Doesn’t it seem strange to you that she would just stop
in the middle of the procedure and leave us here alone?” asked Laura.
Monty only had a puzzled look on his face.
The attendant returned just a short time thereafter with the doctor in tow. The couple
thought that strange. He casually greeted them, then took up his place beside the tech as she
resumed the sonogram procedure. Then came the unbelievable words Monty and Laura would
never forget.
“I’m so sorry, but your baby shows no sign of life.”
What? How could that be? Everything had been going along so well! No, there must be
some mistake. Denial is always the first stage of grief. Tears followed and then everything
became a blur. Laura could not even remember getting dressed again or whatever her doctor had
said afterwards. Monty told her that a dilatation and curettage procedure was to be scheduled the
following day to take away their dream. At first Laura couldn’t bear to tell anyone. Maybe if she
didn’t share the terrible news, it wouldn’t be real, but after Monty cried with her and prayed with
her once they got home, he convinced her that they needed to tell their families and closest
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church friends to let them share in their grief and allow their friends to love on them. Laura could
not talk to anyone but was comforted to hear Monty share their horrid news with their special
people and know that they would be praying for her, for them. Praying? For what? That their
child would not be dead? That they would get over this experience and never remember that they
would have been parents? Anger is the second stage of grief. Then who was she angry at?
Monty? No, it was not his fault. The doctor? No, he had done everything he could. God? Maybe
God. What had she ever done to deserve this? She thought He was a God of love! He had always
dealt tenderly, mercifully with her and her sins. He celebrated her victories, never scourging her
failures. How could He allow or cause such a thing to happen to her? Devastated and depressed,
she clung to the remnant of the baby she still carried in her abdomen and cried herself to sleep in
Monty’s arms.
Blessed amnesia enveloped Laura the next day as somehow the trip to the hospital for the
outpatient D & C procedure materialized. She came home from the hospital in minimal pain
physically, unbearable pain emotionally. What had the doctor said? After a short period of time
for healing they could resume pregnancy planning again.
“Too many times,” he explained, “first pregnancies end in unexplained miscarriages. You
are not alone.”
She walked into their house a broken person, but was welcomed by two of her dearest
friends who greeted her with warm hugs and tears of their own.
“Here, Sweetie, how about some freshly brewed tea? We also fixed you some soup and
crackers that we thought might taste good to you.”
She could not eat a bite, but she appreciated their thoughtful offering anyway. Then they
did the unthinkable. They actually talked about her tragic experience. There was no We can’t say
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the BABY word like that would remind her of what had just happened! No, they asked her to
share her experience.
“Laura, do you want to talk about it? Do you want to tell us the thoughts and feelings
going on inside you right now? We love you and are here as your sisters in Christ to help you in
any way we can.”
Laura could barely get words out before choking on unquenchable sobs, but finally she
was able to put words to the terrible nightmare and share tears with her supportive friends.
Then one of them shared something Laura had never known. This mother of a toddler and
newborn herself, Margaret shared, “Laura, not many people know this, but I lost my first baby,
too. My circumstances were different, but they were also the same. You are not alone. James and
I had been so thrilled at the thought of becoming parents that it never even occurred to us that
anything could go wrong, but it did. One night I started bleeding, so we called the doctor. He told
us to head to the hospital where he met us. It didn’t take long to determine that I was
miscarrying, and we were losing our pregnancy. Laura, I will always know that I have three, not
just two children. One just awaits me in heaven.”
Laura’s grief was still insurmountable, but maybe just a tiny bit less so.
“Margaret, how did you ever get through it? I feel so mixed up with so many different
feelings. My mind feels like it is in a blender. I feel like I have to blame someone. Did you blame
God?”
“Oh, Laura, when such tragedy happens, we are always so prone to blame God first! Yes,
I did, but He did not cast me out. He understood my pain and loss. He suffered pain and loss too,
when He lost His Son. Oh yes, He completely understands. We seem to need someone to blame.
He is powerful enough to prevent this, so He must be to blame, right? We forget that we live in a
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lost and broken world. Death and loss are a result of this sinful world, not His doing. He is not a
genie in a bottle that we can stroke and be guaranteed answer to all our desires according to our
wishes. He offers redemption through his Son. I cannot explain it, but losing my first baby
finally actually made me see Jesus as ever more precious than I had before. It will take time.
Your little Mason will live on in your heart. You will see him one day, but for now, lean heavily
on God and allow Him to do what may sound outlandish right now. He will work this out for
your good!”
Laura wanted to scream that there was no way anything good could ever come out of this
tragedy, but something kept her from doing it. Somehow, the Spirit of God squelched that
argument and hinted that just maybe Romans 8:28 would be true for her.
“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love
God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”
Their perfect life experience was broken, but life did resume. Laura and Monty returned
to work. Seasons came and went. Holidays rolled around. Monty’s family and they took turns
traveling back and forth to spend holidays together. Laura’s mother occasionally called and once
even met them at the Dallas International Airport on her layover to parts unknown. Finally
another pregnancy ensued and then too soon ended. And a third. Further testing revealed that
Laura would never be able to bear a child of their own. Depression and devastation of a new and
more horrible depth moved in. Against Monty’s urging, Laura quit her job at the bank and sat
around the house moping until one day God spoke to her heart in a way she never expected.
“My precious Laura, I know life seems bleak to you right now. I know you are downcast
that motherhood does not seem to be in the future for you. You are discouraged wondering what
the rest of your life will hold for you, but I want you to try to trust Me and obey Me. So many of
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the Bible saints’ lives did not turn out the way they thought they would. Think about Eve. One of
her sons killed the other. Yes, I gave her a third son to comfort her, but do you think she ever
forgot Abel? And how did she ever manage to deal with Cain? Then you know the story of
Joseph and how many times life sent him a rotten deal before I finally showed him how I
intended to use him? Then have you ever stopped to think of the cruel judgment passed on Mary
and Joseph in order to serve Me by bringing My Son into the world? How many people do you
think believed that the child she carried was Mine and not the product of immorality? The list
goes on and on. You do not grow, Laura, by having everything go your way. You will not be a
very powerful testimony to the lost world when your life has no challenges or pain. It is through
those devastating times that the world can see Me giving you strength that one day they will need
as well. Let’s walk on together. I have plans for you and your life.”
Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans that I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans for
welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope…”
Healing and resolution came slowly. God’s message to Laura did not demonstrate
evidence that was immediately discernible to everyone. Monty noticed a bit of life again in his
wife when he returned home from work that day. The faithful friends who met with Laura on a
regular basis to talk, share, read and pray with her began to see a glimmer of hope once again. It
was a step-by-step process of re-engaging in life, but life did resume. Laura considered returning
to work. Being a loan officer for a bank held its prestige and would fill the hours and their bank
account, but somehow she felt God had a higher purpose for her than helping people acquire
more stuff as the fruit of their labor. Was it happenstance or a divine appointment the day she
saw the advertisement for an agency that trained and worked with foster families, Faith
Children’s Agency? Their slogan, “Giving every child the chance to have a family,” rang a chord
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with her. She longed for a child. Children long for a home. That old high school niggling raised
its head and said: Maybe? She let it simmer on the back burner of her mind.
One weekend afternoon after watching the conclusion of a lack luster Dallas Cowboys
football game which intrigued Monty and only marginally interested Laura, Monty moved closer
to her on the sofa and engaged her.
“Honey, can we talk?” After her nonverbal affirmative, he continued. “How are you and
God doing with our not having children?”
“Oh, Monty, it just hurts so much. I am trying to hold onto God and believe that He
knows best and is doing a good work in our lives, but some days I do better than others. If I get
busy then I do okay. Then I see someone with a baby or some commercial on television about
children and I plummet again.”
As he watched the pain in her eyes to determine just how far he could probe the subject,
he heard her respond, “I’m healing, coming along. As an act of my will, I choose to see Him still
as good, loving, and kind. I fight the temptation to challenge Him and try to believe somehow
that He really has a plan and that one day it will all make sense. I still hurt, but I am trying to see
the cloud’s silver lining or at least to believe there is one.”
“You know, I am sure my pain is different from yours, but I have grieved over losing my
dream for fatherhood as well. I really do share your loss. My dreams of having a son or daughter
of our own to care for and spoil are lost, too, but over time I have been thinking and wondering
about something. Is this too soon to bring up the subject of adoption? What do you think?”
Oh, how she loved this man! He was a wonderful provider. He was a man’s man who
loved his sports and getting his hands dirty when the task called for it. He was not afraid to cry:
Uncle, when he realized he was out of his league, and he really loved God and wanted Him at the
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control panel of his life. Had she lost sight of his pain while wallowing in her own? They had
talked, prayed, and cried together repeatedly, but had her focus been primarily, selfishly only on
herself? Probably too much. He was grieving the hope of tossing a ball around with a son, taking
a daughter to Father-Daughter banquets, attending and probably coaching all sorts of soccer,
baseball, football and basketball peewee teams. Surely he even missed the chance to play in the
bathtub with a little Laura-Monty image who would cackle when Daddy dripped water over the
little bald head of their own child.
He could see the contemplation in her eyes even though no words formed on her lips. She
was receptive.
“Well, I wonder what you think about beginning to at least check to see if adoption
might be the direction God could be leading us. Like you, I will always miss having a birth child
of my own, but ‘the Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.’ I choose to say, ‘Blessed be the
name of the Lord.’ (Job 1:20b) I think I could love a child who came to us through adoptive
channels as much as a biological one. What do you think?”
She spoke cautiously, not even sure she wanted to bring that old inkling into reality.
“Monty, as I come to make peace with the death of the having-my-own-baby dream, I have
already batted the idea around of loving someone else’s child instead of my own flesh and blood.
You telling me that God has suggested this to you as well makes me think that maybe He is in
this and that we should proceed down this path, but there is something I have never told you. It
never seemed significant enough to bring it up. I love the idea of adoption and have the utmost
respect and appreciation for all those who adopt both locally and internationally. It is a
wonderful way to serve God and humanity in the nitty-gritty of practical theology, but for many
years now, I guess ever since I became a Christian, God has laid another group of children on my
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heart. Maybe this is more what I think I am hearing from Him. There are so many children all
around the world who need a family but have one that is temporarily unavailable. Do you get
what I am saying? What about considering being a foster family?”
While the idea caught him off guard, he was willing to let it sink in and see what God had
to say about it. “Hon, that never dawned on me, but I see your point. It would be hard, but being
sort of a bridge family, to give children real love and family experiences until their own families
could be able to take them back…Wow, that would be tough, but maybe…” After a few minutes
of both of them sitting silently deep in thought, he spoke again, “I think we had better make this
a serious matter of prayer.”
Then and there they did so. At the conclusion, they both felt an odd sense of heavy
foreboding and yet almost an excited anticipation that maybe fostering was where God was
leading them.
“Let’s ask our home group Bible study to pray with us as well.”
Time and prayer and talking and more prayer continued to nurture the foster family idea
in both Monty and Laura’s minds and souls, so one morning after their home group had met and
prayed for them again, Monty asked Laura to call Faith Children’s Agency and check on the next
step. What she found out was that there would be a long and cumbersome process before any
child might ever come into their home. There were interviews, background checks, home studies,
classes, more interviews, discussion groups, health exams and fire inspections. She wondered if
they had to have a cosmetic makeover designer and interior decorator pass judgment on their
lives and home before the process would ever be complete! They did, however, learn a lot along
the way.
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Some people went into fostering for all the wrong reasons. Monty and Laura learned that
there was a stipend that they would receive for each child who was placed in their home, but the
money that was provided was to be used for the provision and welfare of the child. If anyone saw
that as an easy way to make money, God help them. The stipend money would take care of basic
needs for the child but most definitely would not make the parents wealthy. How horrible to look
at fostering as a get-rich-quick scam!
Easy it would not be. They learned that foster children were needy in a variety of special
ways. They would most likely not be easy to rear and could be very challenging at times.
There were the potential foster parents who were in it to fulfill their own dreams. Maybe
they had only been able to have daughters of their own and were shopping for a boy. Then there
were those who had small children and wanted a teenage girl as a free babysitter. Maybe they
needed farm hands. There also was the young single woman who dressed very provocatively and
wanted teen girls to mentor. What path would she lead them down? The selfish list went on and
on. The thought of ever helping the birth family re-establish a home with their children seemed
unheard of to the majority of the fostering candidates. Many of them were out to punish the
biological parents whom they thought were the enemy. How Monty and Laura hoped these
couples would make the cut and not be granted a license. Fortunately, it was a tremendous relief
to find that there were other families with like motives to their own. That was why it was so
important to them to work with a Christian agency. Granted a lot of these foster children would
never make it back to their own previous lives and nuclear families. Sometimes the parents just
never did or could get their issues in order enough to be safe, nurturing homes again, but for
Faith Children’s Agency at least that was the goal. Monty and Laura wanted that to be their goal
as well. If the truth were known, no matter how bad home life had been for these children, the
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child’s heart desire was almost always to be reunited with the birth mother or father they had
known. Reunification: that was the goal. And for the naïve, idealistic couple beginning the
journey, it was the plan.
Finally after months of preparations and a long training process, the red tape was
completed. License in hand, they waited for the phone to ring. Let the adventure begin!
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CHAPTER 3—JUSTINE
Wait. That dirty four-letter word. How they hated the waiting time. They were ready.
There were children in need everywhere. Why weren’t they getting the call? How could Laura
fill the time waiting? How could she prepare? The spare room remained yellow. That would go
with just about any child. The teddy bears might or might not. She would wait before removing
them. The only situation they had declined was a child with serious medical needs. She was no
nurse and simply not prepared to handle many significant health issues. There were medical
foster homes specifically trained and equipped to handle the wide scope of severe medical needs.
Now the question became: Would they be given a boy or a girl? Baby, child, teenager? What
ethnicity? Did it matter? No. She merely prayed that God would do the prep work in both
Monty’s and her hearts to be what the coming child would need.
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Then finally the phone rang and the call came.
“Laura, there is a brand newborn baby girl who was delivered by a woman in prison who
needs placement.”
The case worker had little information. Her name was Justine. She had been born just the
day before in Gatesville, Texas, at the prison infirmary to a woman incarcerated there. The baby
had a little jaundice issue, so she would need to stay under medical observation temporarily.
They could have her in two days. Two days! Oh, my! Most people had nine months to prepare
for the coming of a baby, but forty-eight hours! How in the world would they manage this? It
didn’t matter. They would achieve it.
She immediately called Monty, “Oh Honey, the agency called. They have a child for us.
It is a brand new little baby girl who was just born yesterday! I can hardly breathe. God has a
baby girl for us!”
Monty did not wait for details but straightaway took the rest of the afternoon off. He
rushed home to celebrate with Laura. They skipped lunch and headed back to the children’s store
they had drooled over a few years back to actually purchase the baby furniture they now needed.
The crib they had decided on previously was no longer available, but they found a four-in-one
convertible crib they liked that would adapt to a toddler bed and eventually even a full-sized bed
thereafter with a matching combo chest of drawers and changing table. They also chose a Boston
rocker to complete the necessities and were pleased to hear that all of their purchases could be
delivered the following day. Oh, how Laura would spend hours rocking that blessed little bundle
in that rocking chair! Next they headed to a nearby Babies RUs for supplies.
She prayed as she rode along beside Monty, “Oh, God, I love her already. Help me be all
the mommy she will need. Give me wisdom and balance so I train her but don’t dote on her.
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Help me share You with her every day, and may she come to know and love You always and, oh,
yes, guard my heart. The goal is reunification, so help me hold onto her with open hands, so
some day I can place her once again into the hands of the woman who bore her.”
How hard that was to pray, but as an act of her will she did. She would desperately try to
keep that perspective in focus, but for now the experience was delirium, ecstasy, and extremely
fun! She called their home group leader.
“We got the call, Angela. The agency has a child for us. It is a newborn baby girl. We
will get her in two days! I don’t know how we will ever be ready for her, but I am so excited that
we will make it happen somehow!”
Their weekly meeting was the following night, and the leader’s wife promised she would
call everyone stat and throw together a makeshift baby shower for the night they met. Everyone
would bring little girl baby duds and needs to help Monty and Laura fill their coffers. The group
would also pray for smooth developments.
At their next stop they filled up on a diaper pail, bottles, bottle warmer, formula,
pacifiers, toiletries, baby bathtub, sheets, blankets, bumper pads, musical mobile, swing, stroller,
baby monitor, newborn diapers, wipes, bibs and several outfits that would make the little angel
look adorable. The agency would provide the car seat that they would deliver her in. They loaded
everything into the spacious trunk and back seat of Monty’s sedan, amazed at how much
equipment it took for one small infant. They knew that more needs would come later as a high
chair, more toys, and who knew what all else would be needed.
As Monty unloaded the car, Laura called several friends who currently had infants
inquiring who the best pediatrician in the area was. When a consensus was reached, she called
the designated doctor, explained that she was about to become a foster mother of a newborn and
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needed to set up an appointment for an initial evaluation. The hospital had already provided that
assessment, but another appointment was part of foster home protocol. A doctor’s appointment
within the first forty-eight hours after placement was required. Laura was pleased to hear that the
pediatrician could see the baby the day after she arrived.
Laura set to work washing the new items in baby laundry detergent as recommended and
washing or sterilizing everything that would touch little Justine. Dinner would be a quick throw
together meal tonight, probably what would become the norm rather than the exception
thereafter.
They talked non-stop that evening about the quick life change they were about to
encounter, stopping to thank God for His blessing. They prayed for His leading in each step, for
that new little girl person and the mother she would be leaving behind. Finally they fell asleep
beginning to see God’s working good out of their terrible loss.
The next morning they awoke only mildly aware that that might be one of the last nights
they would be able to enjoy a full night’s sleep uninterrupted by the pitty-pitty-patter of little
bitty feet so to speak, but they were ready, or at least they hoped so. They were certainly excited.
Monty returned to work that day but spent his time tidying up details so he could take off the
following day when Justine arrived. Thankfully his boss was understanding and supportive.
Laura spent the day micro cleaning Justine’s room from floor to ceiling and eagerly setting up
the crib and other equipment for the baby once it was delivered. She had planned to leave the
assembly work to Monty, but the directions were really a no-brainer, and she couldn’t wait. By
evening it all looked adorable and only needed a precious little baby to complete the scene,
something Laura had feared would never happen. It was not according to the will of Laura, but
according to the will of God, and it was good.
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Their small group lavished them with generosity and provided many special tidbits any
new mother would appreciate, things they knew Laura and Justine could not live without. The
experienced mothers considered practical matters by adding a thermometer, teething gel, sun
screen, and such things that only seasoned mothers would think of. The members gave other gifts
as well providing a wardrobe for the little princess that royalty would envy, but the greatest
blessing was at the conclusion of the evening. They seated Monty and Laura in the center of the
living room on two dining room chairs beside each other and gathered around them standing in a
circle, placing their hands on their shoulders and arms and each in turn praying for them. Prayer
would make all the difference. As a final token, the leaders presented the couple with a combo
baby book-scrapbook with the name Justine beautifully embossed on the cover. They would
record every milestone in her life both for her and for the mother she would hopefully one day
return to.
The following day a call from the social worker notified them that she was tied up in
traffic but should arrive about 1:00 PM. She had picked Justine up in Gatesville at 9:00 AM with
a clean bill of health and instructions on formula, umbilical cord care, and directions to place her
in direct sunlight for a few days to keep the jaundice at bay. She had needed to stop once for a
feeding and diaper change, but the little lady had been a good traveler. Laura was ready with
open arms and heart. Monty had the camera ready for the first picture of their little girl for them
and a copy to begin her life book. Minutes ticked by like sand stuck in an hour glass refusing to
move on, but finally they heard the crunch of tires turning into their driveway and saw a small,
economy agency car roll towards them. Unable to wait, they charged through the front door,
down the sidewalk and headed for the back seat where the infant car seat that held precious
Justine was secured. The social worker unlocked the doors, and Laura eagerly fumbled trying to
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release the harness that protected the baby. Once successful she gingerly lifted the infant being
very sure to support her head and back as she caressed her to her shoulder and stood there in
awe. A baby in her arms! Oh, God, this was really happening.
Monty clicked several snapshots, then removed the car seat from the car and carried it
into the house. With an: Oh, by the way…the social worker introduced herself and lifted a small
bag of baby supplies that would probably not even get them through the first night, ½ dozen
disposable diapers, a small can of powdered formula, and a receiving blanket. No matter.
Between their shopping spree and the loving charity of their friends, little Justine would be well
provided for.
The group entered the house and sat down in the comfortable living room to take care of
formalities. As Laura sat, she relaxed Justine into a reclining position in her lap so she could get
a good look at her for the first time. She had to be the most beautiful little baby girl Laura had
ever seen. Monty sat beside her and let the baby grasp his finger. They were both hooked. The
case worker took care of the all too cumbersome paperwork and gave them the hospital’s and the
agency’s instructions, then asked if they had any questions. They had so many but didn’t know
enough to even think what to ask, so they just smiled. The agency representative gave them her
personal phone number and told them to call with any questions that came up regardless of time.
That was very comforting. They felt so green. With that the case worker left, and they were on
their own. God smiled down on them as they began a journey that would take them to places
they never even knew existed in their hearts.
Laura held Justine and just adored her until the baby began to squirm and fuss. She must
have been hungry. Laura should have thought of that already and had a bottle prepared for her,
but she hadn’t. Monty offered to hold the baby, so Laura could make the needed preparations.
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That would come easily soon enough, but for now she had to mechanically think where every
utensil was and read the instructions carefully to be sure she mixed the formula to the appropriate
proportion for a 3-day-old infant. Then she had to be sure it was warm enough, but not too warm.
By that time Justine was exercising her lungs to their full extent. Patience was not a virtue she
seemed to have, but a robust voice was. Monty was handling the situation pretty well, all things
considered. He did not hurry Laura, but he was very ready to hand the baby back to her to let her
dispense the first feeding. With a healthy appetite, Justine took the bottle and cooperated with a
generous burp before falling asleep in Laura’s arms. They could do this. They would do this. She
held her for several minutes.
Laura then asked Monty, “Do you think I should put her down to sleep? I wonder if that
is the right thing to do now.” Then a sheepish grin covered her face as she added, “Why? We are
happy as we are, so there is no rush.”
Contentment seemed to exude from the little family. Laura did, however, want to be
better prepared for the next feeding, so she offered Monty another turn with the sleeping angel.
He took over, glad to have her sleeping peacefully that time. Laura prepared several more bottles
for the refrigerator ready for quick heating and eating. Then she placed the agency’s diapers
alongside the supply she had purchased and placed their contributed blanket into the crib. She
made some simple preparations for dinner for Monty and herself and then took out Justine’s life
journal to record their initial impressions and feelings about this amazing little girl.
The evening progressed, and they were able to consume their own dinners switching the
baby back and forth between them in order to cook, serve, eat, and clean up the meal. Another
less traumatic feeding had come and gone, and several diapers had been changed. It came time
for them to retire for their first night. The crib was all set. The baby monitor was turned on and
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checked to be sure Laura could hear everything easily from the device on her night stand. She
stood beside the crib in order to put Justine down for the night, and she just could not do it. She
walked coyly into their bedroom with Justine in her arms and looked at Monty with little-girl,
impish eyes and said nothing but silently begged him to let Justine sleep with them…just for that
night. He smiled, turned back the sheet and blanket and invited his girls to join him. No, they did
not sleep through the night, not that night and not for a good number of nights thereafter. They
did get into the swing of parenting though and learned more about themselves as well as their
little girl than they had ever known they could. They loved each other even more with that new
dimension to themselves and found ample room in their hearts for another member to share.
Already feeling more at home being a mother, Laura answered the phone the following
afternoon when the case worker called, “Hi, Laura, how did your first night go? Well I hope. I
want to check up on you and to inform you that visitation with Justine’s mother in prison will
need to be arranged soon.”
God used that wake up call to remind Laura of their arrangement with God and the
agency. They would love and care for that little girl as if she were their own, but in the final
analysis she was a ward of the state of Texas, only in their care and on a return home path if her
birth mother could complete her prison sentence and prove to be a suitable mother. It would take
a lot of grace to maintain the necessary balance of bonding with the baby and giving her all the
mothering the child would need but to hold on loosely enough to one day let her go. After only
one day, Laura already realized how terribly hard that day would be. God would really have to
work here.
The case worker was already working with the prison facility to get Laura, Monty,
herself, and of course, Justine listed as acceptable visitors for Justine’s mother.
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“The paper work should only take a few days and then we will need to drive the two and
one-half hours down to the Waco area to meet Justine’s mother and let her have two supervised
hours with her baby girl. I will accompany you the first time at least just to be sure everything
goes smoothly and we all know what to do. Then you and Monty can continue the visits
thereafter.”
The drive was substantial enough that it was agreed upon that monthly visitation would
be sufficient. With the first visit scheduled for a week from Saturday, they made arrangements
together to leave the house at 10:00 AM. That would give them time to get everyone up, fed,
dressed and ready to go without a rush. The plan was to stop for lunch in Waco and then proceed
to Gatesville for a visit from 2:00 to 4:00. They would return home in time for dinner. It would
pretty much fill up the whole day.
That Saturday morning arrived, and the family was able to manage being ready to leave
at 10:00 after dressing Justine in her third outfit. She had spit up on two already. When she had
just donned the second one, Monty was holding her so Laura could clean up the mess from the
first eruption, and Justine got both her clean outfit and Monty’s shirt that time, but when the
doorbell rang they were all clean and ready.
Laura apologized, “Sorry for the stacks of laundry on the sofa, our breakfast dishes still
visible from the kitchen sink and the vacuum cleaner standing in the hallway. Life with baby
does not allow for luxuries like a neat and tidy house 24-7.”
They all smiled and left being sure to carry several spare outfits, diapers, wipes and
bottles. On the drive down Monty drove since his car was larger and more comfortable than the
agency issued vehicle. The case worker sat in the front seat with Monty, and Laura sat with
Justine’s car seat in the back seat so she could tend to the baby’s needs. After some small talk,
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Laura asked if there was any more information they could know about Justine’s mother. So much
was kept confidential. Foster families were informed only on a need-to-know basis.
All the case worker could share was, “Justine’s mother’s name is Diara. She is 18 and has
been sentenced to 16 years in prison, maybe being granted parole in 12 if she maintains good
behavior. She is incarcerated in the Texas Department of Criminal Justice facility in Gatesville,
Texas, Murray Unit, for a manslaughter charge of killing Justine’s father.”
Oh, wow, Laura had assumed she had probably been caught doing drugs or writing hot
checks or something of a non-violent nature, but murder? She had no idea. How would she ever
be able to let her precious baby girl go back to be raised by a murderer? She immediately began
to negotiate with God that maybe that whole reunification plan was a mistake. Surely that was
more than He would allow. She began to loathe Diara and view her as an enemy without even
realizing she was doing so. Two hours once a month was all that woman would get of Justine
and she had better be thankful for it!
They stopped at a modest sandwich shop for lunch while Laura fed Justine. Then they
resumed the final leg of the journey to Highway 36 Bypass and the Murray Unit Correctional
Facility. Barbed wire and security lighting were not welcoming features. They showed their
identification and were confirmed as acceptable guests on the visitation list before passing
through the metal detector security post. Laura was informed that the infant seat and diaper bag
had to remain in the car. Not even bottles were allowed, no food of any sort. They even had to
empty their pockets and purse of paper money. Only a small amount of change was allowed.
Both women decided just to leave their purses locked with the diaper bag in Monty’s trunk. They
were directed into a large room sparsely furnished with outdated sofas and rockers around the
perimeter and wooden tables and chairs scattered throughout the center. Various visitors rambled
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in until the outside door was locked and no more guests were allowed. At precisely 2:00 PM a
group of women inmates was ushered into the room by guards, most of whom moved quickly to
their respective guests, some giving quick kisses and embraces and then assuming visiting
positions. A plain young woman stood alone and was greeted by Justine’s case worker then
brought over to the sofa and chair near one corner where Monty and Laura sat awaiting the
inmate. The young woman, barely more than a girl, was introduced as Diara, and they were
introduced as Laura and Monty, the new foster parents of baby Justine. The woman all but
yanked Justine from Laura’s arms and began to look her over as if she expected bruises and burn
marks all over her. Without a word spoken Laura was offended. She further disliked Diara. Diara
felt an equaled hatred for the couple who, in her estimation, were stealing her baby from her. The
group tried to make small talk, but the awkwardness of the whole situation made Laura dread
having to do this monthly from here on. Justine fell asleep in her mother’s arms, and Diara seem
to mentally check out of their presence and simply cherish the precious minutes she could spend
with her baby girl. Eventually Justine awakened and predictably began to fuss. She was hungry,
but the bottles were outside in the trunk of Monty’s car. That was not good. Diara was able to
cajole and moderate Justine’s hunger temporarily, but all too soon it became apparent that
Justine was not to be put off any longer. When Diara asked for a bottle to feed Justine, they told
her they did not have one.
Before even being allowed to hear any word of explanation Diara began to rave, “These
new people deliberately didn’t bring food for my baby because they didn’t want me to have time
with my daughter.”
Trying to explain quickly became fruitless and the guard gave Diara a stern warning look
that she had better get herself together or this earned privilege would be withdrawn. As Justine
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continued to wail, the case worker suggested that the visit be cut somewhat short in order to feed
Justine. She apologized and promised to bring her back in a month for another visit. Diara
begrudgingly handed Justine not to Laura but to the case worker and stomped off toward the
guard and back in the direction of her cell. Laura felt bad for her in spite of her negative feelings
toward the woman and determined on upcoming visits to feed Justine the very last thing before
entering the visitation room so that Diara could have the full time with her baby. It had not been
her fault, but she felt the woman’s pain.
Subsequent visits were only provided by Monty and Laura. Case workers were so busy
and overburdened with their caseloads that a whole day devoted to one of her charges was too
demanding. Monty and Laura did not mind. The recurring day trips would be fun for the little
family. They would find various little eateries to frequent and even plan some picnics
occasionally, weather permitting, as Justine grew. Laura prayed for Diara every day and asked
God to help her find it in her heart to care for Justine’s mother and treat her kindly. It was a
stretch.
Laura thoroughly enjoyed each day and night spent caring for and getting to know this
precious little girl. In no time she had recorded many milestones in the life book that Justine had
accomplished. She had smiled. She had slept for 6 hours one night. She had found a special spot
nuzzled in the crook of Monty’s neck where she would calm down and fall asleep at times when
she would get frazzled and not be able to be consoled by Laura. She was getting into a pretty
predictable schedule of sleeping, eating, and then having a fussy spell in the evening that seemed
to help tire her out for a longer sleeping span during the night. She loved the water, so bath time
was great fun for her to kick and splash. She was gaining weight successfully and getting good
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reports from the pediatrician. The infant vaccination schedule had begun. She had been fretful
after the first set, but would hopefully do better next time.
When visit #2 with Diara came, Laura was careful to see to it that they arrived at the
prison by 1:30 so she could remove Justine from her car seat in the parking lot, feed her and have
her set to be satisfied for the full 2 hours. She determined to win Diara over no matter that they
had both gotten off on the wrong foot. They sat in the same spot in the social area and watched
as the female inmates entered the visitation room as before, only this time Diara knew where to
come to see them. She took Justine from Laura’s arms with maybe a bit less aggression this time,
but Laura was quick to begin the visit by apologizing for the abbreviated stay last time.
“Diara, I am so sorry that our last visit had to be cut short. I admit to being very new at
this mothering thing and actually would like for you to give me any guidance or suggestions you
might have. The guards wouldn’t allow us to bring food in for Justine last time, and I had not
calculated how long it had been since her last feeding, so of course she became hungry before
our time was up. Please help me do this.”
With an astonished look on her face, Diara stammered, “Me? I don’t know anything
about being a mother. All I did was make her inside me. Most of the time I was pregnant, I was
here in the joint. I knew they would take my baby away from me as soon as she was born, so
there wasn’t much motivation to learn what to do with her. I never meant for any of this to
happen this way. I just couldn’t let him hurt me any longer once I knew he wasn’t just hurting
me but my baby too.”
Laura could see there was much more to this young girl’s story than met the eye. In time
maybe Diara would open up to them and let them see a glimpse of what went on inside of her.
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Laura asked anyway, “Well, since she is your flesh and blood, what do you say if we do
this together? You help me decide what is best for her, and I will carry it out. For instance I have
tried to give her a pacifier, but I know some mothers don’t like them for their babies. What do
you say? Should we do pacifiers or not?”
Startled, Diara seemed to consider Laura’s offer, then replied, “Sure, I guess so, if it
makes her happy. I’d rather she not suck her thumb. I hate seeing big kids still sucking their
thumbs. And I guess it would be hard to stop thumb sucking once they get used to it. So, yeah, I
guess maybe a pacifier would be good.”
Laura added, “I wish I could bring you a baby book to read, and then you could make a
list of the things you want me to do and not to do. I can share with you what she is doing, and we
could compare notes, but they won’t let me bring anything.”
“Oh, that’s no problem. They have a library here. I don’t care much for reading, but I
could see if they have any good books on babies and maybe see what I think. Thanks for
suggesting it.”
Laura proceeded to share the little things Justine was already doing and told Diara about
the life book her friends had given her with the big JUSTINE embossed on it. It would be
Justine’s to keep forever. She could not promise that it would be Diara’s, not yet, but it would
always be Justine’s. If Diara was to be in Justine’s future, then it would be a keepsake for her to
have one day as well.
Laura told Diara how Monty was giving her good fathering also. She shared how he
could console Justine at times when Laura just wasn’t what the doctor ordered. She tried to
describe and show Diara how he would hold her in his special Daddy way, but it just wasn’t
making sense. It really surprised them both when Diara asked if Monty would show her how he
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did it. She handed her baby to him and almost before he could position her into the special spot,
Justine fell asleep and cooed contentedly. They all smiled. It was almost time for the visit to be
over, so Diara suggested he just let the baby stay there and not disturb her before it was time to
leave.
In the remaining minutes, Monty interjected, “Diara, you know the three of us, rather the
four of us, are going to be in this for the long haul. We want to make you a part of this family
and become very special friends. We want what is best for Justine and what is best for you, too.
How can we pray for you over the next month?”
“Pray for me? Are you kidding! I’m in prison. No one has ever prayed for me. I have
messed up my life. I have messed up my baby’s life. There is no God who cares about the likes
of me.”
“Oh, but you are wrong about that, Diara. We all mess up our lives in one way or another,
but God doesn’t rank us by our good deeds or condemn us according to our bad deeds. We are
like little children, like Justine here. She doesn’t work for our love. We just love her because she
exists. God just loves you because you exist. Think about that. We will pray over the next month
until we see you again that you will begin to feel God’s love in spite of anything you have done.”
“And you can pray I can be forgiven for the horrible thing I did to Chad.”
With that the guard blew the whistle and all the women immediately marched out of the
room back to their prison cells.
In the weeks and months that passed, Justine continued to develop very quickly as babies
do. She developed more personality, slept through the night, slept in her own crib (!), rolled over
to her back, then rolled to her tummy, cut her first tooth, sat alone and continued to twist the
hearts of three adults around her little finger.
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Trips to Gatesville were proving to be more satisfying for all concerned. Diara came to
recognize Monty and Laura less as the enemy who were robbing her of her little baby girl. The
couple began to recognize the tremendous love Diara had for Justine and felt less apprehensive
about her having a violent side to her nature, but it still bothered them that she had demonstrated
terrible violence at least once in her lifetime. Could they ever trust her with Justine? Returning
the baby permanently to her mother was an event that was so far into the future that it was not an
ever present concern. They would deal with that if and when the time came. They did wonder,
however, just what Diara’s story was.
Each visit Laura or Monty brought up the topic of praying for Diara. She thanked them
with minimal sincerity and never again really revealed any heartfelt concerns. She just asked
them to pray for help that she would get along with the guards and other inmates, that the food
wouldn’t always be cold and bland and that they wouldn’t keep running out of hot water in the
showers. They prayerfully sought ways to bring the Lord more into their conversations but
struggled not wanting to sound preachy or judgmental.
Diara always beamed when she walked into the visitation room with the other women
and locked eyes with Justine before ever glancing at Monty or Laura. The baby was coming to
enjoy seeing her mother as well and rewarded Diara with sweet affection.
Getting ever wigglier, one time when Justine was sitting on Diara’s lap, she flounced
unexpectedly and bumped her head on the edge of a nearby end table. It was only a small bump,
but one would have thought Justine had broken her jawbone. She wailed unrelentingly, but to
Diara’s horror the baby reached over to Laura for comfort, refusing to be comforted by her birth
mother. Laura took her and quickly dispelled the baby’s trauma, but without verbalizing it, all
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parties realized that although Diara was staying involved in her baby’s life, Laura had become
the primary caregiver and was recognized by Justine as such. No one could expect otherwise.
When the doctor said it was time to begin introducing solid foods to Justine, Laura
discussed the matter with Diara. Would she rather start her on applesauce or pears? Rice cereal
or barley? Green beans or English peas? Diara had been able to get a baby book from the prison
library and had shown genuine interest in learning about baby care. She would query Laura
periodically to be sure that all necessary steps were being taken to provide for Justine’s
wellbeing. Laura took no offence. That was the plan. Diara’s input kept her involved in Justine’s
life and kept her focused on the rehabilitation that was supposed to happen while she was
incarcerated. That was a good segue into discussing Diara’s future.
“Diara, were you ever able to finish high school?”
“No way.”
“No, well now would be a good time to get your GED, which would open up other doors
to future opportunities.”
When asked that question, Diara had opened up a bit about her background.
“No, I didn’t finish high school. I had done okay in school, I guess. At least I always
passed, but I hated my life at home. My older brother took all he could manage there until he ran
away and joined the Navy in Beeville, Texas, when he turned seventeen. Dad was always
screaming at mom and us and made life pretty miserable. I’m not sure whether Mom had to sign
for Bubba to enlist or not, but if she had to, I bet she didn’t hesitate. She knew how bad it was
living with our dad and didn’t blame Bubba for wanting to get away. See, my father worked for
the big beer brewing company in Shiner, Texas. Most folks in Shiner worked for the brewery in
one way or another. He made good money, so we had everything we needed, but he loved the
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company products a little too much. In most jobs, I suppose you get busted for drinking on the
job, but it was his job to sell customers on their brews, so coming back a bit buzzed after a
working lunch with customers, while not exactly condoned, it was tolerated as long as his sales
quotas stayed fat. I guess he was a very good salesman.
“There was a designated shelf in our house refrigerator where his cold beer had better
always be chilled and ready for him, and he imbibed liberally. I guess at work he was a fun
drunk. Not so at home. In the comfort of his own house, he was a mean drunk. Mom had better
have the house neat and clean or he would knock her around. That was a regular occurrence.
Dinner better be ready and taste good. That all depended upon his appetite fancy at the time, and
too many times he didn’t think Mom’s cooking was what he had in mind. His laundry had better
be clean and put up. She was expected to be his slave and a mind-reader at the same time. You
get the idea. My brother and I just had to keep out of his way. We had better not make noise,
walk in front of his TV programs, or, worst of all, knock over one of his beers. I just kept to my
bedroom and gave him lots of space.
“After Bubba joined the Navy, I had them all to myself which was not a good thing. He
got meaner with Mom, beating her down both physically and emotionally until she was like
melted wax and unable to protect herself, let alone me. I was nearly a teenager and started
getting a mouth on me. Well, he was someone you didn’t stand up to, not if you wanted to live to
tell the story! When I got saucy with him, which was becoming a pretty regular thing, he started
yanking my hair and slapping my mouth when I shot back at him. That should have given me a
clue, but I only got more fired up. I would scream at him and make all sorts of threats that I had
no way of carrying out. It just sent him further and further into his rage, which he took out on me
with punches, bruises, shoves, and lots of verbal assaults.
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“When I was fifteen, I’d had my fill and I bolted. I packed some stuff in a duffel I had,
and I robbed some money from Mom’s purse to buy a bus ticket. I only had enough money to get
me to Waco, but that sounded like a nice city, so I took off. I suppose my parents may have
reported me as missing. Maybe not, but the small town sheriff in Shiner didn’t exactly have
access to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children data base. I became a cold case
pretty quick.
“On the trip down to Waco, I started thinking about what I would do when I got off the
bus. Good planning, huh? Well, I figured I’d spend the night in a rest room stall of the bus
station and then find a job and a place to stay the next day. It sounded simple. I had a couple of
bucks left, so I bought a candy bar from the bus vending machine, got a drink of water from the
water fountain and bedded down in the bathroom. Early the next morning I set out to conquer
Waco. I walked a few blocks and found a fast food restaurant where I was sure I could pick up a
job right away. Not being sixteen was a deal breaker. Same story at the convenience store nearby
and the grocery store. The pawn shop gave me the same answer. I came to a park next and saw
some people eating pizza from a box during their work lunch break. Fortunately, they did not
finish it, so that became my lunch after they left. I sat there wondering just where to go next, not
quite to the point of desperation yet but getting pretty close, when I noticed a nice looking man
who was casually dressed walking up to me.
“He questioned me, ‘Hi, Sweetheart, I’ve noticed you sitting here in the park, and I saw
you eat that leftover pizza from the box. Is that all you’ve had to eat today? I’ve seen you here
for a while.’
“He told me he had been watching me, but I didn’t ask why. I guess since I ate the
leftover pizza he figured I was a runaway.
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“He added, ‘Hey, I own a café around the corner that serves pretty good food, if I do say
so myself. We serve breakfast, lunch and dinner, seven days a week. I live upstairs above the
café in my own living quarters. You know, I could use a new dish washer.’
“He didn’t care if I was only fifteen and he said I could stay with him and work for my
room and board. I would be able to eat at the café. Here was the answer to all of my needs. I
jumped at the wonderful offer. His name was Chad.”
She stopped there as if that explanation of why she had not finished high school was all
the explanation they needed. Laura and Monty caught their breath as they heard the girl’s story.
How could anyone judge someone for her actions when living in such an environment? Their
hearts went out to her. Would there be any way God could redeem this young woman?
The next month’s visit was postponed because Justine had gotten sick. It was nothing
serious, just a cold that had complicated into an ear infection, but it was not a time to travel with
a sick baby. They called the prison and asked them to alert Diara. When they called back after
Justine was well again to reschedule a visit, they were told that Diara had lost visitation
privileges. Apparently she had taken the news of the last visit’s cancellation very hard and had
let that chip on her shoulder rise with the wrong inmate. The ensuing scuffle had not injured
either party seriously, but both were on restriction for a month.
So, it had been nearly 3 months since Diara and Justine had shared their visiting time.
Now Justine was into stranger danger and refused to go to Diara when she reached for her. That
obviously broke Diara’s heart. Justine was crawling avidly now and even pulling up. It would
not be long before she tried to walk. Instead of trying to force Justine into her mother’s arms,
Laura had an idea.
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“How about if we just let Justine down on the floor and let her crawl around on her own?
Then hopefully she will come your way, Diara. Just don’t pick her up too quickly and scare her.
Let her take the lead.”
Laura prayed the baby would go investigate her mother and choose to see her that way.
She also prayed Justine would not pick up any grunge from the less than sanitary floor. Thrilled
at the prospect of exploration, Justine took off for wherever her nose lead her. After several
redirections by Monty when she ventured too far away from the group, she seemed to sense
Diara’s longing gaze and crept toward her. Remembering that Laura had warned her not to pick
the baby up too hastily but to wait for signs from Justine that she wanted a boost, Diara allowed
Justine to meander over to her and pull up at her mother’s side before picking her up. It had
worked.
They had a wonderful exchange, and Diara was flabbergasted at how verbal Justine had
become. Nothing was intelligible, but more and more the sounds resembled words. At Diara’s
question if Justine was actually speaking yet, Laura assured her that most babies babble
something that sounded like mama and dada before they really directed it toward their parents.
They assured Diara that each time Justine tried to say those words to them, they had redirected
her to call them Laura and Monty. Mama was going to be reserved for Diara. For the first time,
they saw tears in Diara’s eyes.
“Thank you both so much. I can’t wait to hear her call me her Mama. Oh, everything I
did to protect her was worth it.”
“Diara, my heart aches to hear what it was like for you a few years back. Do you want to
continue sharing what happened after you got to Waco?”
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“I guess so. I don’t guess I am so worldly wise even now, but at fifteen, I was pretty
stupid. I guess I thought Chad would be like a kind uncle or something and just give me a job
and a home and let me continue being a naïve teenager. However, when we got to his café, first
he showed me around the dining area, then the kitchen. I saw where I would work and what I
would be doing. It was nothing fancy, but I knew how to wash dishes, and I was grateful to have
a job. Then he took me up the back stairs that lead to the living quarters. There was a small living
room with just enough space for a small sofa, one side chair with an end table between, and a
huge TV. Off to the side was a dinette with seating for 4. The kitchenette was tiny, but I assumed
most meals would be eaten downstairs in the café. There was a functional bathroom and one
bedroom. One bedroom! Where was I going to sleep? My confusion quickly gave way to
recognition that in this sole bedroom was where I was expected to sleep--with him. I hadn’t
bargained on that. I guess he had. It seemed obvious to him. What were my choices? None that I
could see, so I resigned myself to putting youth behind me and stepping into womanhood
immediately. It couldn’t be that bad. That night proved to be worse than I thought it would be,
but not as bad as I guessed it could have been. There was no courting, no wooing, just getting
down to business. It didn’t hurt too much. I guessed I would get used to it.
“The next day I spent all day alone washing dishes, silverware, pots and pans. It was
boring, but no one screamed at me or punched me. Weary by the time the café closed after
dinner, I headed upstairs to collapse. I was expected to perform again for Chad. Before retiring to
sleep he gave me an aerosol can of spermicide foam and told me to use it and shower before
coming to bed. He told me he was not about to use condoms as they spoiled it for him, and he
didn’t want any pregnancy happening. He wasn’t going to take me to any doctor and pay that
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kind of money to get the pill. This foam stuff should be sufficient and if not we would just take
care of it then. Numbly, I obeyed.
“The café was open 7 days a week, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. My days were long and
my nights interrupted. I wasn’t sure this is what I hoped for when I left Shiner, but here I was,
and here I would stay I supposed. Every now and then during the afternoon lull Chad would take
me down the street and let me buy a couple pieces of clothing from the thrift shop there. I had
always had new clothes before, but this stuff wasn’t so bad. I thought it was generous of him to
take care of me. When I asked him when payday was, he told me most of my earnings were
offset by room and board, but since I really didn’t need to have any spending money of my own,
he would keep the money over and above my keep safe and secure for me. I wish I had spoken
up and said that was not okay.
“Chad liked his beer well enough, but nothing like my dad had, so no problem. Then one
night after we closed, he told me to hang out in the bedroom because he had some guys coming
over to play poker and drink beer. I didn’t have much to do, but I took the opportunity to turn in
early and catch up on sleep. Later on the racket died down and the bedroom door opened. The
male image in the doorway was not Chad but one of his poker buddies. It seemed Chad had lost
that night and when he ran out of chips, I was put into the pot. He lost that hand also and his
buddy had won me for the night. He only stayed a little while, then I showered, applied my foam,
and returned to bed this time to service Chad.
“I began to really sink into despair. This did not feel right. These poker nights didn’t
happen regularly, but often enough that I became pretty depressed. One afternoon lull while
Chad was busy talking business with some other men, I slipped out the back way and walked
down the street to a free health clinic I had seen on one of our shopping trips. I went in and lied
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my way into getting some tranquilizers because I said I was dealing with the supposed death of
my parents in a horrible auto accident. It must have sounded believable, because they gave me a
large bottle of the potent stuff. I took one, and it knocked me into next week. I tucked them into
my one drawer in Chad’s bureau and returned to work. Dirty dishes don’t notice someone who is
stoned. And Chad did not care that night.
“The next poker party night was the worst. I guess Chad was the big loser, because I had
to service all 4 of the men. Their laughter and raucous enjoyment plunged me to desperation. My
thoughts became irrational with how to stop this spiraling anguish. Shortly thereafter when I
didn’t think it could get any worse, I discovered that my foam had failed me. I was pregnant. But
there was no way I would tell Chad. He would insist that we end the pregnancy. He had made
that clear. I remembered my mother taking so much abuse from my dad and never standing up to
him for herself or even for me. I had taken Chad’s abuse, but I would not allow a child, my child,
to be subjected to such a life, not as long as there remained an ounce of strength in me. I came to
see why my mother never left my dad. She had seen no options, but I had a plan. I took all those
tranquilizers from the bottle and smashed them to a powder.
“The next night, Chad sat in the overstuffed side chair watching some nonsense television
program and drinking his beer. After he downed several, he ordered me to get him another one. I
grabbed my bottle of powdered tranquilizers from the bureau as I headed to the refrigerator. I
opened him another brew and emptied the whole bottle of tranquilizer powder into it. I didn’t
know if it would change the flavor or not, but I figured he was already wasted enough that he
probably wouldn’t notice. He didn’t. He just peacefully went to sleep, never to leave his chair or
finish his television program.
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“I did the same. I went to sleep and amazingly slept soundly. Sleepiness from pregnancy
might have played into it, but the end of the nightmare played a part as well. When I woke up the
next morning, I did not know what to do. My plan only went as far as last night. Chad remained
where I had left him, so I dressed as usual and headed downstairs to work. The morning manager
questioned where Chad was, so I told him that he had slept in the chair last night and wasn’t up
yet. That was technically the truth. Eventually Chad was checked on; it was determined that he
was dead, and the police were called. I was questioned and told the truth, well, part of the truth.
He had been watching TV and drinking beer. I had gone to bed. He had slept in the chair and just
not awakened that morning. The autopsy revealed a pot load of tranquilizers in his system that
had killed him. Not being too smart, I had left the empty pill bottle in the kitchen trash, which
they easily discovered. Between my fingerprints on the tranquilizer bottle as well as the beer can,
the obvious conclusion was drawn that I had killed him. Well, I had, hadn’t I? The night of the
four-way party, I had screamed at Chad that I wished he were dead. His friends had heard my
threat and were glad to report it to the police. That didn’t leave much doubt in anyone’s mind. I
had motive, opportunity, and means. No one else had access. It was an open and shut case. All
my public defender did for me was get my sentence knocked down from first degree murder to
manslaughter. I had planned it and executed it deliberately, but I had no record, and I guess the
judge felt sorry for me. Battered Woman Syndrome never entered anyone’s mind.
“A quick negotiation found me guilty, which I was, and sentenced me to sixteen years
here in the pen. I was given prenatal care but informed that my baby would become a ward of the
state of Texas at birth. I guess you know the rest from there. No need to keep saying you will
pray for me. As you can see, I am too far gone for your God to care about.”
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Tears rolled down Laura’s face preventing her from speech, and moisture filled Monty’s
eyes just to overflowing as well.
“Oh, Diara, you poor, precious girl. What you have been through is beyond belief! Don’t
ever think you are beyond the reach of God. He holds out open hands to you and would welcome
you even in your brokenness.”
Time was up and Diara returned to her cell. Monty picked Justine up and carried her out
to their car. Laura was inconsolable thinking of all Diara had endured. Her prayer life for Diara
took on an all new depth.
Justine became cuter and cuter as the months went by. She was learning to do so much on
her own. Her speech was becoming clearer every day.
She said, “ball, baba,” for bottle, “bye-bye, nigh-nigh,” for good night, “NO, mine,” and
was still working on mama and dada.
The couple avidly encouraged her to call them Monty and Laura which finally became
Meemee and Lala. They referred to Diara as Mama and longed for the day the little girl would
call her mother by the endearing name. She was now feeding herself, walking everywhere,
singing and getting into everything. The house had been completely redecorated with anything
dangerous or valuable put up high or stowed away. Toys and play equipment were the new
décor, but Monty and Laura loved every moment of it.
Justine had her own little Sunday school class at their church where the children played,
sang Bible songs, learned Bible stories, had snacks and learned to pray. Monty and Laura had a
Bible time with her every evening where they sang the songs she was learning at church, play
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acted out the Bible stories with all three of them taking on roles and then all held hands and
prayed simple prayers before tucking her into the toddler bed.
Monty would pray, “God, please watch over Justine as she sleeps and watch over Diara,
too, and keep her safe.”
Laura would add, “Lord, please draw little Justine’s heart toward you and teach her to
love and serve you. Help her mama to come to know you, too.”
They could barely make out Justine’s prayers, “Bless, MeeMee, bless LaLa, bless me,
bless my dollies and my teddy bear and my mama. Amen.”
Laura had read that in the early days of language development, children may learn as
many as four new words a day. She believed it. On each visit with Diara, she would share new
words the precocious little girl would say and then be surprised when she still came out with yet
new ones. The three of them all still prayed for Diara every day by name that Mama would come
to realize God loved her and would forgive her for every wrong she had ever done. To date, they
had seen no softening in Diara though.
The next visit found Justine rambling on and on verbally in her mostly gibberish but
sometimes recognizable baby talk. They all laughed and tried to carry on conversations aside
from the antics of the toddler but were regularly interrupted by the little live entertainment. All
of a sudden, Justine crawled up to Diara and became silent.
She looked deeply into her mother’s eyes and said, “Mama.”
The group went silent. Diara had a look of utter astonishment on her face, then burst into
tears.
“Mama, no cry.”
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Justine proceeded to take her mother’s hands and try to manipulate them into some sort
of clasping position, the way she held her hands when they prayed at home and at church.
Again she looked up into Diara’s eyes and said, “Jesus, pray Jesus.”
Laura had not known that she knew these words. It made sense because Jesus and pray
were very common words in her little world, but the toddler had them now for her mother.
Seeing a softening in Diara that they had not seen heretofore, Laura said, “Diara, even
Justine wants you to know Jesus. We all want you to realize that despite everything you have
experienced in your life, God loves you. He forgives you. Every wrong thing you have ever done
has been forgiven because Jesus paid the consequences. He stands at the door of your heart and
wants to enter in and take over control of your life. He offers freedom to you, not from these
literal prison bars but from the prison of guilt, shame, and regret that has trapped you for so long.
He did the work. You just have to stop shutting the door in his face. Will you?”
“I don’t know how. I’ve never even been to a church.”
Monty added, “It’s not about church, Diara. God is everywhere and wants you to allow
Him to be a part of your life, no, to be your life right here where you are. Just let go of your
doubt and give in to Him.”
And right there in the middle of the prison visitation chamber, Diara let go of all her
shame and guilt and asked Jesus to help her know how to switch gears and start letting Him be at
the control center of her being. She still had thirteen years to serve, but her soul was paroled,
never to be imprisoned again. Laura suggested that Diara contact the prison chaplain and ask him
what she could do to start walking the new path with her new Lord. The four of them began
singing, Jesus Loves Me, and for the first time, Diara believed He really did.
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On subsequent visits, the four practiced Bible verses Justine was learning in Sunday
school, acted out Bible stories together, sang and prayed. Laura shared new accomplishments
Justine had mastered, and Diara shared new insights she was gaining from the Bible and study
guides the chaplain had given her. She still studied her baby book, too and made sure Laura and
Monty were taking care of her little girl in top-notch fashion. Laura faithfully kept up the life
book with pictures and reports on everything Justine was doing.
The summer before Justine began kindergarten, there was much talk about school by all
parties. Justine was very excited and talked about all the big girl things she would soon be doing.
“There will be pencils and lots of writing. I will have new crayons and colored pencils,
scissors and glue. And I will have folders. They are things my papers will go in when I get to
bring them home for LaLa and MeeMee to see. Then I will get a lunch box and even a back
pack, too. I will have new friends and a new teacher. LaLa tells me that I will have to sit in a
chair when my teacher tells me to and do everything she says I should do.”
It was in one of those visits that Diara added that she also was about to return to school.
She had investigated the prison GED program and had decided to start the same time as Justine
started kindergarten. Then she told them that she just might go on and do some work-study
program after that. She was praying about which one to pursue. They assured her they would all
pray with her for direction in the matter.
So both of the girls began school that fall and shared learning experiences now in their
monthly meetings. They still did their Bible verses, sang lots of songs and acted out Bible
stories. Then as Justine played and did her homework, Diara would ask the myriad of questions
she always had about living the Christian life. Not all of the questions had easy answers. She was
really struggling with forgiveness, not for herself, but for her father, her mother, Chad, and the
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other men. How could she just say that all was well, forgiven and forgotten? She still bore such
emotional wounds and scars.
Monty shared, “It takes a lot of time and faith to understand that forgiving someone does
not mean that nothing wrong was done to you. It is an act of your will to leave it in the hands of
God. ‘Vengeance is mine…’ is both an Old and New Testament principle stated in Deuteronomy
32:35 and again Hebrews 10:30. It is up to God to enact His justice on those who hurt you. You
just need to trust Him to vindicate you and leave it with Him. It isn’t easy, but it is the only way
for you to find peace.”
They prayed with her that she would come to find healing from her horrors and not let
them dominate the rest of her life. Monty showed Diara a scar he had from an incident he
experienced years ago in high school sports.
“Diara, I caught a cleat of another player and received several stitches in my upper arm. I
can see my scar and always will. I remember the fall, the pain, and the time it took to heal. I will
never forget it, but it doesn’t hurt any more. I have full use of my arm. Healing takes time. The
memory will never be totally obliterated, but you can return to full use of your heart and soul.
Just give it time. And pray asking God to salve the injury.”
The decisions for Justine to play T-ball and kinder-soccer were jointly made. Justine
loved both although she wasn’t a star athlete at either. As they had thought years ago, Monty
coached one of her teams each season, and Laura was the refreshment mom for the other. How
they wished they could invite Diara to see one of Justine’s games, but that was more of the
consequences of her prior actions. Justine gave her mom blow-by-blow descriptions and
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demonstrations on visits, but it still hurt Diara to miss so much of her little girl’s growing up
activities.
Laura shared teacher conferences with Diara and was glad to report that the child was
doing very well in her studies and was showing a proclivity toward singing and math. Diara
shared with Justine, “Honey, I am so proud of how well you are doing in math, but I am having
trouble with the math part of the GED prep.” Comically she suggested, “Maybe you could help
Mom out.”
Justine spent the rest of that session showing her mother how her teacher at school had
used pictures of little objects to explain adding, subtracting, and skip counting. Everyone
laughed.
“Sweetheart, now I know I will do fine on my test because of all your help,” Diara
encouraged.
When Laura picked Justine up from the bus one day, she noticed red eyes and a
crestfallen look on her daughter’s face. When questioned why, Justine had explained, “Today
was my day for show and tell. I shared that I had two mommies and one daddy. My daddy was
called MeeMee, and I had one mother called Lala and another called Mama. I told everyone that
I live with my MeeMee and Lala, but my Mama lives in Gatesville because she has killed
someone, and that was wrong”.
Justine had become comfortable with the story of her life, but little did she understand
how uncomfortable others would be with it, or how cruel children could sometimes be. The other
children in Sunday school had not given her much trouble with it because their parents believed
in forgiveness and grace, but these school children started saying that her mother was a jailbird,
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and she was the daughter of a murderer which made her a killer, too. It broke Justine’s heart. It
broke Laura’s, too. Life can be so cruel. Justine learned the hard way that sometimes sharing the
whole truth is not the wisest way to go. They decided they would not share the show and tell
story with Mama. It would make her cry, too.
Justine became more careful telling playmates about Mama. She just learned to say that
her Mama was away for a while until she could be okay to take care of her again. She visited
Mama and loved her, but MeeMee and Lala were her real family now. Laura, of course, told the
other mothers that Justine was a foster child, but that she had been with them since birth. When
the parents questioned Monty and Laura about Justine’s birth mother, they repeatedly had to
quell the adults’ curiosity by telling them that the facts of Justine’s parents were confidential.
Most understood. Some were offended. How sad.
Elementary school passed and middle school loomed on the horizon. Justine joined the
school choir and loved to perform, even securing the spot of a few solos. She continued to excel
in math, but loved to read as well. Diara completed her GED and had enrolled in a Career and
Technology Program that trained her to be a travel agent. That would give her skills to use
beyond washing dishes once she was released. Her behavior had been very good so she was up
for parole soon, after only twelve years. She yearned for the day when not too far away she could
resume life on the outside and be with her daughter fulltime.
Diara surprised Monty and Laura one visit by telling them that the chaplain had
encouraged her to contact her mother. She had written her at the old address not knowing
whether or not she would still find her there, but she had been successful. Her mom remained in
the old house. Diara had written to make amends for running away and to let her know
everything that had happened in her life. To her surprise her mother wrote back and told Diara
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that they had only minimally investigated her leaving years ago. Like Bubba she did not blame
Diara for wanting to get away. She had not wanted to bring her back to more of what had made
her leave.
Justine’s father had drunk himself to cirrhosis of the liver and had died a few years back.
The company life insurance policy had left her mom comfortable. She had gotten counseling for
her own abuse and had come to have a much healthier view of life. She had wanted to find Diara,
but hadn’t known where to start. Bubba was still in the Navy stationed overseas, so she didn’t
see him much either. She insisted that she would love for Diara to come home to Shiner with her
little girl and live with her once she was released from prison.
Laura wanted to be happy for Diara. In some ways she was, but the reality of what she
had known twelve years ago was coming home. Justine, her little girl, was not really her little
girl at all, and one day soon she would be leaving Monty and her. It was the way it was supposed
to be. This was a success story. Reunification was being accomplished. A troubled and abused
runaway girl had become an educated, functional member of society, a young woman with skills
to provide for herself and her daughter and faith to carry them through. Then why did she feel so
bad? Laura tried not to be selfish, but her heart wanted to tell Diara to go away and leave Justine
with the parents who loved her and had been with her from birth. Oh, God, how hard this was!
Breaking the news to Justine was no piece of cake, either. Like Monty and Laura, she had
always been told that this was the plan, but now that it was happening, she was having serious
second thoughts.
“I know Mama is my real mother, but Lala, she doesn’t really know me. She hasn’t come
to one of my soccer games or choir performances. She didn’t see me sing the solo in the church
Christmas program. She hasn’t come to field day at the end of school every year. She doesn’t
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know my teachers, youth group leaders or any of my friends. I can’t do this. I don’t want to do
this. Why can’t she just go live in Shiner with her mother and visit me every now and then?”
“Oh, Justine, I know this is so scary for you but you do know her. And you are bone of
her bones and flesh of her flesh. God is calling on you to do something very difficult, but He will
not leave you to do this alone. We will always love you and pray for you.”
Teary and approaching teenager-hood, she dramatically stormed off to her room, crying,
and slammed the door.
No one ate, slept, or laughed much those next days. Monty and Laura tried to keep the
home atmosphere upbeat, but it was artificial at best. They reviewed the JUSTINE life book
together page by page and revisited every good and the occasional trying memories. They helped
Justine pack her suitcase, but they had to ship a lot of her things to Shiner. She certainly was
leaving with much more than what she had when she had arrived. This time they were not the
ones to transfer Justine into her mother’s arms. It had to be done officially, so a new case worker
was to pick her up from their home and drive her to Gatesville in time for Diara to be officially
mustered out. Diara would be given a bus ticket and $50 dollars to get her to the McConnell Unit
in Beeville, Texas, which was to be the location of her parole officer. She had gotten special
permission to return to Shiner to live since she had stable living arrangements with her mother
there. She would have to make the 100 mile, one and three-quarter hour trip from Shiner
regularly to meet with her parole officer until she could prove herself responsible and law
abiding. Monty and Laura had no doubt that she would be successful in this endeavor. Faith
Children’s Agency would provide Justine’s ticket and money for food along the way. It was all
set.
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The crunch of the tires of the small, economy agency car once again alerted them that the
case worker had arrived. There was only time for one final prayer and brief hugs before stoically
Justine and the case worker headed out to the car. Monty and Laura could hardly look at each
other as they watched Justine fasten her seat belt and the car back out of the driveway. The foster
parents would hold it together until she was out of sight. They would. They just would. Then
they lost it. “Oh, God, you give and take away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.”
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CHAPTER 4—SHATINA
The house was so quiet. The house was so neat. Their hearts were so heavy. They prayed
so earnestly for Diara and Justine and the huge transition in all of their lives. They knew they had
to fill their empty hours with purpose, so Monty submerged himself back in work and Laura
began ministering to the elderly and shut-ins at church. Before long she had a long list of
women, a few men and several elderly couples she would visit weekly to assist with household
chores or personal tasks, errands, food preparation, reading or just talking. It really helped her to
see that others had problems, pain and loss besides her. It felt good to mix and mingle and do
something that mattered once again to people in need, even if they weren’t children.
One day as she was heading to one couple’s home to pick up some prescriptions they
needed to be refilled from the local pharmacy, there was a breaking news story of a bombing at
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Ledbetter High School in southern Dallas. The report was that a troubled student had strapped a
bomb to himself underneath the overly common hoody so many students wore and shortly after
the morning tardy bell had walked into the teacher’s lounge just off the front offices where only
a few teachers with first hour planning periods were relaxing. The front office had been packed
with late students providing a wide array of elaborate excuses for their unavoidable delay in
making it to class on time! The principal had gone into the lounge to grab a cup of coffee before
returning to the office to make the morning announcements. As one, the teachers and principal
had looked up to remind the loitering sophomore who appeared at the faculty lounge door that he
needed to head to the front office for his excuse when the concussion of the explosion shattered
the business as usual atmosphere of the morning. Chaos understandably ensued. People
screamed. Students ran in all directions. Staff rushed for phones to call 911. The nurse darted
from her office to check for injuries. Parents in attendance panicked. The school secretary blared
LOCKDOWN repeatedly on the PA system. All other staff personnel were called upon to
evacuate the immediate area. Doors slammed. Crying could be heard around every corner.
Police arrived in short order and secured the building efficiently. Fire fighters easily
extinguished the small fire that broke out in the lounge. Fortunately, it was determined that the
bomb had been small and only caused local damage. Crime tape was posted around the lounge
doors, but the rest of the school appeared to be essentially unharmed. However, within the walls
of the faculty lounge, the student with the bomb, the principal and three teachers who had been
sitting near the door were all badly burned and otherwise injured. Ambulances were taking the
five to area hospitals. More details would be forthcoming as they were available.
Stunned and horrified, Laura rushed into the home of the couple she was visiting and
upon seeing that they were witnessing a similar report on their television, they all clasped hands
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and prayed for the students, teachers, staff and all parties impacted by this alarming tragedy. She
called Monty and informed him, then prayed with him on the phone again. Trying to regain
composure, she resumed her daily tasks and headed to the pharmacy.
Reports continued throughout the day. The bomber and the principal had been killed. One
teacher was seriously burned and had broken bones but was expected to survive. The two other
teachers were both in surgery in critical condition. Interviews of teachers and staff who had
known the boy with the bomb strapped to him indicated that he had been on their radar as a
troubled and disturbed boy. His family had been informed of his struggles and problems, and
interventions were in place to try to assist him. The report continued that authorities had been in
contact with the boy’s mother that day, and she had revealed that the boy’s father had informed
the family the night before that he was leaving and divorcing his wife. Apparently, that had
driven the boy over the edge. Why he headed for the teacher’s lounge was uncertain, but he had
been reported as liking the principal and perhaps was seeking him out for help.
By the evening news, the follow-up added that one of the two women in surgery had died
on the operating table, and the other was in guarded, but hopeful condition.
Monty and Laura’s Bible study group called an impromptu meeting that night to pray for
the injured, the families of the deceased, and the students and families of all who had been
touched by the traumatizing event. One of the women in their group who was a school counselor
from their area high school added that the principal was a man she had known professionally for
some years. His name was Garvin Elliott and his wife’s name was Gloria. She was an English
teacher at the same school. That information made it seem all the more personal and notched
their prayers up significantly.
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Three days later, the phone rang just as Laura was headed out the door to spend some
time chatting with a dear elderly man from church with Alzheimer’s who would tell her again
today about the year the football team he coached had made it to the finals only to lose because
of a holding penalty in the final moments of the game as they scored what would have been the
winning touchdown had it not failed to count. The call was from a case worker from Faith
Children’s Agency.
After minimal small talk, the worker indicated, “Laura, we have another foster child to
present to you.” Laura felt an almost giddy excitement as she listened to the other end of the
conversation. “There is a girl who is thirteen, a seventh grader in middle school who has
experienced a family tragedy and needs a home. She will be available tomorrow.”
Laura felt sure that Monty would agree, but understandably she said she needed to confer
with him before giving a final answer. She disconnected that call, and immediately dialed Monty
who was also eager to resume fostering. They had so little information on this new girl. Laura
really should have asked a few more questions before calling Monty but the truth of the issue
was, it really did not matter. God was knocking. They were answering. The return call would
begin wheels in motion to place another precious girl into their home.
Laura redialed the agency number to let the social worker know they would love to have
this girl join their family. “Can you tell me anything else about her?”
“Yes, certainly. She is a good student who loves to swim and read. She has some asthma
problems, but is watched by her doctor, so it rarely gets in her way. She has an older sister
Damaris who is a college junior, so the plan is for her to remain in foster care until her sister
graduates from college and secures employment, then they will live together. There are no other
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siblings. Her grandparents are too elderly and other family members are unavailable. Her name is
Shatina Elliott, but she prefers to be called Tina.”
Laura’s heart caught in her throat. “Elliott? Is she the daughter of the school bombing
principal?”
“Yes, she is, so you can understand why we want to be very careful where we place her.
In addition to losing her father in the bombing, we need to let you know that the second teacher
who died on the operating table was, in fact, her mother Gloria, so she lost both of her parents.”
To herself, Laura called out to God, “No, no, no! How in the world am I ever going to be
able to help a girl who has experienced such a horrific loss? I don’t think I am up to this. I can
pray for her, but surely You must have someone else much better prepared to help her than I am.
This is just too terrible.”
The case worker continued, “Laura, most of my other foster families already have several
children with them. Shatina really needs some concentrated love and attention right now instead
of parenting having to be split with other children, so I thought of you and Monty as the perfect
match for her. I am so glad you two are on board with having her. I’ll get back with you on the
particulars,” and she disconnected the call.
Excitement was replaced with serious apprehension and even dread. What were they
getting themselves into this time? Laura fretted with insecurity and rapidly developing random
thoughts of the chaos that lay ahead. When Monty came home from work, Laura was a wreck.
She unloaded all of her fears and reluctance, “Monty, how horrible. Can you imagine all this
poor girl has gone through? I don’t know how to help someone in her position. I don’t think I can
do this. Surely God must have someone else in mind for her. I am not trained to help anyone who
has dealt with tragedies like this.”
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His direction was only to meet her with unwavering faith and confidence. “Laura, we
don’t have to do this alone. Remember? It is not up to us. She is a child of God. He loves her and
cares about her. He is the only one who can accomplish her healing, but He is faithful to do it.
We just get to stand by and watch Him work.”
He made it sound so inviting, so possible. God had knocked. They would answer. They
would open their hearts and doors to this very needy girl. With a bit more reluctance than she
hoped to feel, she agreed to let the new adventure begin.
Two days later, Tina arrived with far more possessions than foster children generally had.
She had not come from poverty as so many foster children did. She had been well adjusted,
provided for and had been loved and nurtured. Obviously, she had just experienced a huge loss
that would take some time to heal, but maybe this placement would be a piece of cake for the
couple. They directed her to the yellow room minus the teddy bears and gave her time to settle in
and put up her possessions. She was very quiet at dinner, but who could blame her? They tried to
make small talk, but what was one to say? They knew they could not push her to speak before
she was ready. After all, the funerals had only been the previous day. They would give her the
evening to get more comfortable and then begin the process tomorrow of incorporating her into
her new world. The agency would provide weekly counseling for her, so hopefully that would
help her process her tremendous loss.
The next morning Tina came into the kitchen about 9:00 neat and dressed but as quiet as
last night.
“Would you like some breakfast, Honey? Eggs, cereal, a bagel, juice? After you eat, we
need to go to our area junior high and get you registered for school. I hear everyone says it is a
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great school with super teachers. I think they even have a swim team. I understand you like to
swim?”
“No, thanks, I don’t eat breakfast. I’m ready whenever you are. I don’t think I want to
swim anymore.”
The sadness in her voice almost broke Laura’s heart. Time, she just needed time. “Let’s
pray before we head out. This is a lot of change for you.”
“If you want. I don’t really care.”
After one of those prayers with groaning too deep for words, Laura tried to optimistically
direct Tina to the car for the ride to the school. The girl spoke not a word. Laura commented on
the building as they entered heading for the office, “This is a pretty new school, and it has some
really innovative additions that the students seem to love.” Tina appeared uninterested. “I really
like the school counselor. I got to know her from when our last foster daughter attended here.
She is a really nice woman and was so helpful to us before. I’m sure she will be very helpful to
you, too.
Laura handed the counselor Tina’s previous school records and got her all signed up for
classes without a hitch. When asked what elective she wanted, Tina chose a study hall. Laura
wished she would have chosen something more fun like art, music, or something interactive that
might have helped her connect with other students, but Laura let the decision be Tina’s.
The counselor indicated after school activities that Tina might want to consider, “We
have several intramural activities open for girls such as volleyball, basketball, drama, and
swimming. It doesn’t take previous experience, just a desire to work hard and have fun.” Tina
declined them all.
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The drive home was just as painful. “How about if we stop off at the drive-in for a soft
drink? I know it is not even lunch time yet, but I guess we could splurge just once.”
“No, thanks, I’m not thirsty.”
When they got back to the house, Tina went into the yellow room that was to be her new
bedroom. Laura prayed that she would come to feel that the room was hers and that this place
would become home. She knew it would not happen immediately.
Laura soon fixed some sandwiches, fruit, and chips for lunch and brewed some tea. She
called Tina out to join her and set the food on the dinette table. Tina seemed to walk out with a
black cloud draped above her head and slumped into a chair. Laura prayed over the food and
gently prayed a blessing on Tina in her adjustment and sadness. Tina picked at a sandwich
slightly and sipped some iced tea, then returned to her room.
Dinner was routinely an enjoyable time for Monty and Laura to reconnect and debrief
after the day’s events. They would each talk about their day’s activities, no matter how mundane
they had been. They would share information they had learned on friends that day, trying not to
get too gossipy. They’d also comment on world and community affairs briefly and sometimes
even get philosophical on issues of the day. Especially tonight, they tried to incorporate amusing
and entertaining anecdotes to lighten the atmosphere. It failed. If Tina ate at all, it was minimal.
Laura noted that Tina was a master at moving food around on her plate with the appearance of
eating. Time, the girl just needed time.
They did not even know when Tina retired for the night. She was to begin school the next
day, so they had told her what time they would leave in the morning. Laura would drive her the
first day, then the district bus would pick her up and drop her off at the corner, only a few houses
away. Justine had ridden the bus with no incidents, so they expected that detail to run smoothly.
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Obediently, Tina appeared in time to leave the next morning, declined breakfast, and
headed to the car with back pack and school supplies in tow. Laura prayed for her before they
left the garage, gave her lunch money, and told her she hoped she had a good first day. There
was no comment in return. Laura watched the black cloud enter a building all too similar to the
one that had taken her parents away from her.
The bus dropped Tina off after school. Laura had been watching for it and hid from view
lest Tina think she was smothering her with undue concern. Tina went straight to her room and
began working on homework. That was a good thing, right? They would not have to be nagging
parents of a teenager to get her to attend to studies. Dinner and the evening were a repeat of last
night. Time, she just needed time.
The school week continued with no change in format. No talk, no breakfast, walk to the
bus, walk home from the bus, go to the yellow room to work on homework, silently join them for
an awkward dinner with minimal food actually eaten, retreat to the yellow room and turn in some
time that they were unaware of. The weekend produced little change. Aside from the fact that the
bus did not come and go, Tina pretty much stayed in her room, pushed food around her plate at
meal times, and studied. On Sunday, she dutifully attended church with Monty and Laura, but
refused to sing or noticeably attend to anything the pastor said. She had no interest in any youth
activities. They would not push.
The second week was a ditto of the first. Laura and Monty talked between themselves to
try to determine how they could help the troubled girl. They prayed. They talked to the case
worker. Tina had her first session with a counselor, but, of course, what went on with that
appointment was confidential. Time, she needed time. But how much?
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The third week brought with it what they hoped was a wonderful break-through. Tina had
gotten off the bus talking to another girl! Laura was not terribly impressed with the demeanor of
the other girl as she was slovenly dressed and appeared to even have pink frosted, dyed hair, but
she did not want to be negative. The girls chatted a few minutes at the corner before Tina walked
the few houses home. The other girl walked the opposite direction. Did Laura see a little bit of a
lilt in Tina’s step? Oh, she hoped so.
The two girls continued to chat briefly at the bus stop each day until they parted and each
walked home. One day shortly thereafter after walking into the house, Tina asked if she could go
over to Jade’s house. Who was Jade? Was this the girl from the bus? What was she like? What
about her parents? Were they home? Questions, questions, questions, but Tina was reaching out.
They dare not squelch this tiny spark. They were sure rookies at parenting teenagers!
“So, Jade is another girl from the neighborhood who rides your bus? Great! I hope she
will become a good friend. Sure, go on over to her house and have a great time. Be home for
dinner by 6:00, okay? I’ll be really interested to learn more about Jade.”
Tina left without a word, but was home at 6:00 on the dot. She pushed food around on her
plate, then retired to her room for homework and bed. Progress? They hoped so.
Every few days, Tina went over to this girl’s house, whom they assumed was Jade. One
day when Tina asked for permission, Laura commented, “Jade is also welcome to come over to
our house, your house, you know. You may certainly have your friends over here, too.” No
comment. No change.
Laura tried coming at it from another direction. “So, Tina, tell me about Jade.”
“She’s just a girl.”
Hey, at least she had spoken. “Does she have a nice family?”
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“She’s just a girl.”
“What kinds of things do you do when you are at her house?”
“Just stuff.”
Well, that was telling her a lot. “I hope she is becoming a good friend.”
That wasn’t a question, so Tina took it as an opportunity to ignore Laura and depart for
her room. Laura would have to come at this from yet another angle. She just didn’t know what
that would be. At least she had spoken a bit. Was that progress?
When change began to happen, it was not good. As Tina entered the house, Laura could
have sworn that she smelled cigarette smoke on Tina. She talked to Monty about it, and they
decided on a subversive approach instead of direct confrontation. During their dinner
philosophical topic of discussion, they discussed some of the dangerous trends teenagers had
experimented with over the years.
“You know, Tina, it wasn’t all that long ago that Laura and I were teenagers. It is a
strange time. So many things are new. You want new things. You care about new things. You
and your friends want to do new things. That is the way it is supposed to be, but it can also be a
hazardous time. Teens need to be careful of the new things they experiment with. This is when
so many young people get involved with substances like tobacco, marijuana, drugs, and all sorts
of risky stuff. You know what I mean. We just want you safe. I hope you trust us enough to
discuss any temptations that may come to you. We only want what is best for you.”
So cigarettes came up. While they did not condemn them as an unpardonable sin, they
discussed the dangers of smoking and encouraged other choices. They hoped this would be
sufficient.
They continued to smell the smoky scent.
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Tina’s demeanor and mood seemed somewhat brighter these days, so they had to rejoice
over small victories and let the little battles go. After all, lots of teens smoke, don’t they? They
really did not want to overreact. While doing laundry, Laura noticed an empty package of
cigarettes in one pocket of Tina’s jeans and matches in another pocket. Now they had proof. So
after consultation, Monty decided to call Tina on it, but softly. At dinner…
“Sweetheart, Laura found your pack of cigarettes and matches in your jeans as she was
doing laundry today. I wish you had not felt the need to sneak around and not tell us. That is
more important to us than the smoking itself. You know that it is bad for you, and we wish you
would stop, but more than that we just wish you would come to trust us and let us know what is
going on in your life. We don’t want to make your choices for you, but I hope you will let us
help you towards good ones.”
This girl was certainly a person of few words. She just looked, somewhat surprised, but
mostly unimpressed and untouched.
Jade never did come over to Tina’s house, but Tina started staying at Jade’s later and
later. She no longer asked if she could go and no longer returned at 6:00 on the dot. Monty and
Laura talked to Tina about it, did some minor grounding and discussed the matter with the case
worker. The case worker said she would convey their concern to the therapist. They knew they
were failing at being good parents of a teenager. The harder they tried, the further away Tina
seemed to drift.
The night Tina came home clearly tipsy was the last straw. It was bedtime, so both Monty
and Laura were present and noticed Tina’s behavior simultaneously.
“Tina, come here, please,” Monty began as she passed by them intending to move on to
her room. “What is going on?” No response. “Laura and I love you so much and are concerned
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that you are crossing some lines that are perilous for you, not to mention against the law. We can
tell you have been drinking or doing pot and unless you tell us otherwise, we have to assume you
are getting the liquor or marijuana at Jade’s house.” No response. “Okay then, I take that as a
yes. Therefore, we need to advise you that Jade is off limits from now on. We have notified the
agency as well, and they support us in this decision. By now, I hope you have made other friends
that would be better for you to hang around with. We encourage this. And we would like you to
have them over to our house, your house. We will give you your privacy, but we need to monitor
your behavior more than we have.”
Tina simply went to her room, shut the door, and went to bed.
A few days later, Tina walked in the door from school with a new friend, a girl named
Aster. While Monty and Laura weren’t very impressed with her disheveled, gothic appearance
either, at least Tina seemed to be heeding their instructions. The two girls went into Tina’s room,
shut the door, and remained there until Aster left to go home at 10:00 PM. They refused dinner.
The smell of smoke lingered in Tina’s room, but Monty and Laua honestly could not tell if it was
permeated into the fabric of the room from earlier use or if it was new exposure. Perhaps Aster
was no better influence than Jade had been, but at least she was in their home and under their
eye, or so they thought.
Laura had noticed that while Tina rarely even joined them at the dinner table any more,
food did disappear from the kitchen, and she noticed remnants of it in Tina’s room. They really
did not want food in the bedrooms, but at least she was eating. Which battle was more
important? Laura gently called her on it, asked her to clean up after herself, and told her at least
to keep the food on plates or napkins and dispose of it properly. Tina silently complied.
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Then on one vacuuming spree, Laura found the beer cans under the bed. What all was
this girl getting into? And in their house? She, Monty, and the case worker conferred, notifying
the therapist. Her counselor said she would bring it up with Tina. Confidentiality again, so they
never knew how that confrontation went.
They, however, did address this new issue. “Tina, drinking at your age is against the law.
I don’t know who is getting it for you, but it is no friend if they are giving it to you at your age,
and drinking certainly isn’t going to help you at school or at home either, or anywhere else for
that matter. It is not something we can allow in our home. You need to stop this behavior, not
just here but anywhere you may be. This is a very risky thing to be doing. I hope this is enough
said on the topic.”
Weekly church services seemed to have no impact on Tina. She would dutifully sit next
to Monty and Laura and would allow them to pray with and for her, but her heart seemed to be of
stone, impenetrable by their love or the gospel. They felt like failures as foster parents, even as
people. God certainly did not seem to be using them to help this poor girl at all.
“Where are you, God?” Laura cried out one night. “Please intervene in the life of
precious Tina. She is tumbling down a very dangerous slope into destruction, and I feel unable to
help or stop her. You alone are able to reach down into her heart and meet her desperate needs.
Please help me to keep loving and helping her however You would have me do so. Please give
me wisdom to know how to protect her.”
School conferences revealed that all that time they thought Tina spent studying in her
room was, in fact, not in studying. Her grades had slipped to barely passing. She was smart
enough that she could keep from failing just by minimally listening in class, but here was another
area that screamed out that she was in trouble. Her studying time had actually been time she had
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been sneaking out of her bedroom window and going who knows where? The bent screen and
unlatched window gave evidence to her capers. Just what all was she getting into?
It appeared that the silent girl who had joined their home some time ago had slipped out
apparently on one of those escape times, and in her place a rebellious, resistant Tina had moved
back in. The new Tina defiantly refused to get up in the morning for school, refused personal
hygiene, talked back to both Laura and Monty when they mentioned anything that she construed
as criticism no matter how they presented it. “You can’t make me do anything. You are not my
real parents. I don’t care about school. I don’t care how I look. You two are idiots. I don’t need
you. Just leave me alone and let me be!” She refused to attend her therapy sessions any longer
and stayed out until all hours on a regular basis. Very surprisingly, however, they did drag her
out of bed on Sunday mornings and she did somewhat consent to attend church with Monty and
Laura at their insistence, but she continued to portray utter lack of interest or participation.
The morning Laura heard her vomiting through her bathroom door stirred a new concern.
Was she sick? Did she need to see a doctor? When Tina came out of the bathroom, the drawn
look on her face added to Laura’s concern. Was it mono? Anemia?
“Tina, you look horrible. I am very concerned about you, and I could hear you in the
bathroom. You are sick with something. I really think we need to make an appointment and get
you in to see the doctor.” There was not too much resistance from Tina, so, the appointment was
made.
“I’m not a baby! You aren’t going in with me. I’m going alone,” Tina insisted when the
nurse called her name to see the doctor, so Laura remained in the waiting room, praying
continually that whatever was wrong would be easily diagnosed and simply treated. She also
pleaded once again that Tina would allow God to soften her heart to the love and family Monty
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and she so desperately wanted to give her. What would it take? Laura looked through magazines
not even seeing what was on the pages. It just helped to turn the pages and be doing something
besides just sitting there wondering what was going on.
Finally, the nurse beckoned to Laura to come in because the doctor wanted to speak to
Tina’s guardian. Tina was livid that Laura was to be included, but being a minor left her no room
for argument. What the doctor had to say left Laura struggling to stay afloat. Tina was pregnant.
Barely fourteen and pregnant! Oh, what now? She had to tell Monty. She had to tell the Agency.
What did she say to Tina? How, God, was she supposed to handle this?
She pretty much pulled Tina’s silent routine and just said, “We’ll get back with you,
Doctor,” and took Tina home. While her mind spun in a multitude of directions during the ride
home, Laura did not speak at all. She had no idea what to say or what to do. Tina retreated, as
usual, to her room while Laura made frantic phone calls to Monty and the agency. Both
converged on the house post haste and a difficult conference ensued. There was no
condemnation of Tina or of Monty and Laura’s supervision of the teen, but a strategic gameplanning session was conducted to determine the direction to be pursued.
Shortly thereafter Tina was called out to join their conversation. They all conveyed that
they loved Tina and only wanted her best. The three adults agreed that Tina could certainly stay
at Monty and Laura’s house during the ensuing months and speak to adoption agencies making
her own choice for the family who would raise her baby. Open adoption was even discussed and
encouraged so she could keep in touch and watch her baby grow knowing who it was and
allowing it to know who its mother was. That way she would always know it was safe and being
taken good care of. For the time being, she would remain in school and begin pre-natal care.
Smoking and drinking had to stop NOW. As usual, Tina said little if anything. They prayed for
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her once again and allowed her to return to her room. Monty had put a lock on her window to
prevent further sneaking out.
Their minds reeled as they spent the troubled evening trying to figure out how things had
gotten to this point, what was going to happen short term and long term from here, and where
God was in all this. What was He doing? Their faith told them He was still good. He was still in
control. And He was still working all this together sovereignly. Their flesh interjected serious
doubts.
When Saturday morning rolled around, Monty and Laura tried to get up and have a good
weekend as usual. Tina slept in. Laura remembered that early pregnancy makes a woman very
tired. Woman? This was no woman. This was a child, a very troubled, hurt, confused child.
“God, give us more wisdom to be for Tina what she needs from us.”
They made their normal weekend, festive breakfast anyway, hoping maybe the aromas
would lure Tina from the bedroom. Homemade cinnamon rolls wafted from the oven. Fresh
squeezed orange juice. Hot chocolate, heavy on the chocolate. Fresh fruit cut into bite sized
nuggets. Breakfast time came and went. There was no sign of Tina. Noontime arose. Still no
Tina. Finally, Monty was the one to insist it was time for Tina to arise. He knocked several times
at her door, waiting for a response. He knocked once more and told her he was coming in, so she
had better make herself presentable. No response. So Monty stepped aside and left the task to
Laura. Since Laura was the first one through the door, she was the first one to notice that Tina’s
bed had been slept in, but there was no Tina to be found. The lock Monty had put on her window
was broken along with the screen, and she was gone.
Did they call the police? The agency? Who? They decided on the agency. Once again, the
case worker sped to their house. They began calling what friends of Tina’s they knew of to no
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avail. They decided to wait it out, knowing the police probably wouldn’t take the call until more
time had gone by. It was a very troubling afternoon as the three alternated between trying to be
optimistic, voicing pessimistic concerns, and silence. No one really knew what to do next.
Finally in the late afternoon after waiting, pacing, and praying, an old car rolled up in
front of the house. A young man who looked oddly like Jade walked around from the driver’s
side of the car to the passenger’s side and assisted Tina out. Then he walked her to the front door
where the three adults eagerly anticipated what the young pair had to say.
The boy introduced himself, “I am Jade’s brother Jamal,” and with an air of fatherly
concern, as if this was in Tina’s best interest, he indicated, “I am bringing Tina home from
another doctor, and the baby is no longer a concern.”
Shock and intense grief filled the faces of the group of adults. What more could happen?
At least the procedure had apparently not been botched, and Tina’s health and well-being
physically were not in harm’s way.
Jamal indicated, “Me and Tina have been together for months. I really love her and she
loves me, too. We didn’t plan on that baby thing, but I am glad to pay to get rid of it. I want to
take good care of her. I know she is tired now, so I’m gonna split so she can sleep. I’ll call her
later.”
What planet was this guy from? Soon after he left, and Tina as per usual headed for her
bedroom and isolation.
The case worker, concluding that at least Tina was not a missing person any longer, was
home safe if not sound and that Monty and Laura were in control of the situation decided that her
presence was probably overkill for Tina and left their home. They were in control? They could
take no more. Everything was so out of control. Clearly they were not in the furthest stretch of
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anyone’s imagination in control of anything. Monty and Laura fervently prayed for wisdom and
headed into Tina’s room to say they knew not what.
They knocked on Tina’s door with no response. They cracked the door open and heard
gentle crying. They cautiously moved to opposite sides of the bed and reluctantly sat down on
either side of the crying Tina. Monty placed a hand on her knee. Laura placed a hand on her
shoulder. Her crying became sobbing, then breath-taking heaving. The three stayed that way for
several minutes hearing the girl’s pain but not knowing what to say or do.
Finally, Tina spoke up, “I just hurt so bad. I can’t stand living any longer. I loved my dad
and mom. That bomber took away everything I ever had. I just had to find something to take the
pain away. Smoking gave me a bit of a buzz. Marijuana was a stronger buzz. The drugs and
booze Jade and Aster gave me really helped, but then it wore off and I was a mess again. I tried
to keep studying like Mom and Dad would have wanted me to do, but it just didn’t seem
important any longer. Jamal cared about me. He gave me a reason to live. I never planned to get
pregnant. I can’t have a baby. A baby, a real, live human being. I can’t take care of a baby. Jamal
and I couldn’t take care of a baby. He assured me this was the only way to solve the problem. It
would take care of it and make it all go away, but it didn’t. It took the baby away, but I will
always know that I killed my own baby. It didn’t take away any of my pain. It just added to it. I
have so messed up my life and the pain only gets worse. I know you two won’t want me in your
house any more. I see how you live. I hear at your church why you live like you do. I know I
don’t fit in. Just call the case worker and get rid of me.”
Laura was crying by now so hard she couldn’t speak. Monty was choked up but spoke
lovingly to Tina, “Oh, precious Tina, how we have prayed and tried to help to ease your awful
pain. Losing not only one parent but both at the same time and through such an awful act of
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violence is a horror we cannot imagine, but there is Someone who can. Do you realize that the
God of the universe who made you also lost His precious Son through the violent acts of a
society who condemned Him without cause and caused Him to suffer excruciating torture before
He died? God stood by and watched His Son’s suffering and His death. Oh, He has felt your
pain. The difference is that His Son’s death was not needless like the death of your parents. His
death was an act of love for you. His death purchased forgiveness and redemption for you and all
of us who would simply trust Him and accept this gift He has for you. All of the pain you feel
will not immediately go away, but you will have Someone who really cares for you to walk with
you through the suffering and give you a reason to go on. Believe it or not, He is going to use all
your pain to help someone else down the road. It is amazing how He works things that by
themselves are definitely bad into works that are actually good. We really love you and still most
certainly want you in our home and life. Let us help you find true healing for your pain.”
Group hugs along with tears ensued. They cried, talked, prayed, and cried some more.
Laura shared how she had lost her babies and assured Tina that they would see, hold, and love
their babies one day in heaven. They watched the devastation that had been on Tina’s face shift
to hope as she allowed the Holy Spirit to take control of her messed up life.
“God is in the fixing up of messed up lives business,” Laura shared.
“I think I believe that now,” Tina joyfully sobbed.
The next day was Sunday and the threesome attended church as always, only Tina was all
ears and eyes this week. She had so many questions but she now had hope that there was sun on
the other side of her black clouds. They gave her a few days of physical recuperation before
returning her to school. Monty and Laura were admittedly worried what would happen when
Tina saw Jade, Aster and Jamal again, but their fears were allayed when Tina came home
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actually talking and told them that she had told each of her friends that she had found help much
better than tobacco, drugs, booze, or boys. She had found out that God was really the answer to
all of her suffering and losses. They all either looked at her like she was the crazy one, laughed at
how silly this all was or walked away like she was contagious with some deadly disease.
She pursued her school work once more and joined the youth group at church to learn
more about this new way of life and to find good friends this time. She returned to her therapist
and actually listened and attempted the suggestions that were provided to her. Yes, it took time,
but time and the Lord were changing a troubled girl into one God was using.
Tina kept sharing her new found faith with her old friends. Jamal and Jade just walked
away leaving her in their wake still pursuing their life of substances, but Aster was actually mad.
She challenged Tina at every venture, but Tina continued to try to love her and share Jesus with
her. “Tina, you don’t really believe all that pie in the sky when you die stuff, do you? I thought
you were a real friend. Now you have gone off on some freaky religious ranting and are not my
friend anymore.”
“No, Aster, I want to be a real friend to you now. I just want to share what I have found.
It is amazing and you can have it, too.”
“No, thanks, church lady. I’m doing just fine without all your churchy rules of do’s and
don’ts. Just give it time. You’ll get tired of it all and come running back to our party crowd
where the real fun is.”
The new youth group met on Sunday night at the church primarily for a social time with
just a teenage geared devotion thrown in, so it was a great opportunity to invite friends. Then on
Wednesday nights they met in homes in smaller groups for a more in-depth Bible study, Q & A,
and break-out sessions to address issues teens face in life daily. Tina was inviting every student
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at school who would listen to her, and quite a number had taken her up on at least the Sunday
evening activity. Pizza and music will draw a lot of teens! A few had actually returned and were
sticking. And a couple had even added the mid-week study to their schedule. Even teachers at
school saw the drastic change in her and had talked to her about the difference in her life now.
Most of the school did not know about the baby, and thankfully Jade and Jamal had not felt the
need of throwing mud on her reputation in this way, but almost everyone knew the life style and
substance abuse she had pursued. Not a lot of them knew either about her parents. That matter
still tore at her soul so vividly that she would only go there with her therapist and occasionally at
home.
Then came the week that there was buzz that spread rapidly around the school that both
parents of a graduating senior had been killed in a small plane crash when the guy’s mother was
accompanying his father on a business trip. The whole school turned out for the funeral, but no
one really knew what to say to the youth. Not even the teachers were able to say very much. The
school counselor tried to help when he returned to school, but it came across as plastic and fake.
No one really knew what it felt like to him.
Tina had never even met Cody. It was an unwritten rule in the hierarchy of high school
life that fifteen-year-old freshmen did not actively pursue any type of relationship with
upperclassmen. Seniors were seen as holy and unapproachable. It was dangerous territory and
terrible protocol for the lower house to try to invade the upper house, but Tina could not find that
anywhere in the Bible. At the next pep rally that was held toward the end of the school day, Tina
was entering the gymnasium with several of her new buddies. She noticed Cody head around the
corner in the opposite direction from the gym. While she did not know what he was up to or
where he was going, God seemed to grab her shoulders or maybe her heart and urge her away
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from her friends and toward Cody. When she also turned the corner, she found Cody in an
isolated area that headed toward the band hall just blankly staring out the window at the
courtyard.
“Hey, Cody, I don’t think you know me, but I’m Tina Elliott and I am a freshman.”
Cody looked up with a puzzled look that said, “And this should matter to me because…”
“I’ve heard around school what happened to your parents, and I want you to know how
sorry I am that this happened.”
He was too much of a gentleman to be as rude as he felt, but he did say, “Just leave me
alone, kid.”
“I just wanted you to know that I really do know how you are feeling.” He turned to look
at her like she didn’t have a clue as to what he was going through, but she continued. “You
remember a few years back when there was that school bombing in south Dallas? Well, the
principal and teacher who were killed were my parents. So, I do understand.” She saw him tear
up although there was no way that he would actually cry in front of her. It brought tears to her
eyes as well. “I was so angry at everyone and hurt beyond anything I could imagine. It was just
more pain than I thought I could deal with. Well, I didn’t deal with it very well. I all but
destroyed my life and hurt so many people around me, but while I don’t think I will ever fully
understand why it happened or that I will ever totally get over it, I have come to find some peace
and Someone whose care has helped me cope. I finally did find some healing.” She paused
hoping he would say something, but he just looked at her and seemed to hear her but said
nothing. “Well, I’d better get back to the pep rally, so I hope you know that I will be praying for
you.”
She turned to go and his voice stopped her. “What did you say your name was?”
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“Tina.”
“Hey, thanks. It doesn’t seem like anyone really understands, does it? Everyone tries to
help, I guess, but their words really just tick me off. I just want my old life back. I want to walk
into the old house and find everything just like it used to be, but it isn’t. It won’t ever be that way
again. I can’t stand it. I want to die along with my folks.”
“I really do understand, Cody, but while you’re trying to make your awful loss go away, I
just want to warn you to be careful what you turn to. Believe it or not, some things just make it
worse. I found out that the only thing, rather the only One who can really help is God. He is
someone you can lean on and actually get help from. It doesn’t happen all at once, but walk with
Him and He will lighten your load.” She could see skepticism all over his face, but at least he
didn’t angrily send her away. Feeling like she had said and done all God asked of her, she slowly
retreated and returned to the pep rally.
While Cody did not actually speak to her at school again, he did smile at her if their paths
crossed in the halls or outside of school. One of her new friends from youth group told her in
passing that her older brother had invited Cody to a high school activity at church. Cody had
actually come. God was not using her this time to do His work, but it was happening. She could
see that and thanked God for caring so much about Cody. She ramped up her prayers for him.
She noticed that he kept coming to the church activities and prayed that God would offer Cody
the same soul healing He was working in Tina’s heart.
Tina had always been a good student. Parents so heavily involved in the teaching
profession just might have had something to do with it. Now Tina had once again returned to
pursuing her education, and her grades reflected it. She felt like it was a way to honor her
parents’ memory and legacy. Certainly her teachers noticed this. Tina did not have the reputation
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of the goody goods, book worms, and intellectual nerds, so other students weren’t repelled by her
intelligence. Her teachers asked her if she would be interested in after school peer tutoring to
help some of her struggling classmates. With Laura’s agreement to pick her up at the later hour,
Tina enthusiastically agreed. She began helping several students who simply needed a bit more
explanation from a teenager’s point of view and saw them begin to get it and improve.
Simultaneously, she took every appropriate opportunity to interject her faith and good lifestyle
choices to the other students. She hoped and prayed that God’s influence would impact some,
maybe only one, and her life and bad choices would work together in the long run for good to
honor her heavenly Father. She found several students who were in different stages of grief,
anger and fear of the future mostly from divorces of their parents or other family issues. While
that type of family loss did not seem to compare to Tina’s multiple parent deaths, she could
certainly relate to their losses and was able to share as a listening ear and someone who could
offer help. She found a couple others who had lost grandparents or an older sibling to college,
marriage or the military. One had an older brother who had tortured the family for years with his
drug and gambling addictions but now was in a rehab facility. Each one had his or her own
source and level of grief. Tina did her best to use her testimony of loss and finding the Great
Comforter to help these students process their wounding.
Tina had not had a lot of contact with her sister Damaris since their parents’ funerals. Her
college was out of state and the more Tina had gotten into substance abuse the less she had
contacted Damaris. They had shared some brief visits on college holidays, but neither Tina nor
the agency wanted to overly burden Damaris with Tina’s poor coping. Tina had been able to put
on the fraudulent front pretty well for the short spurts when she saw Damaris, and actually being
around blood family for the time lessened her need for alternative ways to salve her pain. She did
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learn that Damaris had been dating a young man named Devin, and apparently he wanted to
marry her sister. The plan was for Damaris to take Tina once she graduated and was settled into
adult life, but how was Damaris supposed to care for a younger high school sister and marry as
well? Tina knew she would ruin her sister’s life if she went to live with her after her sister’s
graduation and marriage. She did not want to do that. Damaris had experienced the same loss she
had. She deserved happiness with Devin. What was Tina to do? Where was she to go? She felt so
alone and cried out to God to fill the terrible void she felt. She also knew that her time with
Monty and Laura had been powerfully healing and wonderful for her. She began to think and
pray about her future plans. She talked to her counselor about her idea until she felt comfortable
that it was the direction she should go and really wanted to go.
She approached Laura and Monty one evening. “Hey, guys, can I talk to you for a
minute?”
“Talk, Tina talks? Go figure! Sure you can talk to us. I’m just yanking your chain.”
“Yeah, I know. I’ve been a real trip, haven’t I?”
“You have been a trip to heaven and back, young lady. What’s up?
“Well, I know you have told me about losing all your own babies and wishing that you
could have a kid of your own, but that God seemed to tell you instead that you should open your
home up to troubled kids like me, right?
“Sure, and He has blessed us by doing it so much more than you can imagine. So?”
“Well, I really don’t have anyone to live with once Damaris graduates and that is pretty
soon. My sister was supposed to take me, but she’s about to graduate and really wants to marry
her guy. I can’t mess that up. It really wouldn’t be fair. So, I was wondering if I could stay with
you forever.”
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“Well, of course you can, Tina. You already know that. We have no intention of ever
sending you away. Even when you turn eighteen and you age out of the system, you know you
are always welcome here.”
“That’s not what I mean. I am talking permanent, official, really making me your honestto-goodness daughter. Adopting me.”
When they finally caught their breath, Monty and Laura looked at each other and without
hesitation exclaimed simultaneously, “Oh, yes!”
The three spent countless hours examining thoughts, motives and direction that had lead
Tina to this important decision. Monty and Laura, while their initial response had been so very
positive, privately had many a serious discussion as to whether or not this was God’s leading and
in everyone’s best interest to pursue adoption of a teenager. Finally all three became honestly
convinced that adoption was what they all wanted to follow.
Even for foster families, the adoption process takes time. The agency was delighted to
hear the wonderful news and began the process right away. Damaris was also happy for her sister
since she had seen how well Tina had managed to deal with losing their parents since coming to
Monty and Laura’s and how well she was adjusting now. While the three of them waited and
anticipated the blessed day to come when Tina would become more than a foster child but a real
honest-to-goodness child of theirs, they continued to do family and praise the God who had
worked all of their pain already for His good and theirs. It was decided that Tina would keep her
Elliott last name as her middle name and add Monty’s last name as her new last name. They
never wanted her to try to forget her birth parents or for them to totally try to take their place.
School was drawing to a close for the year and Tina had been able to pull her grades back
up to what would have made her parents proud. It certainly did for Monty and Laura. Tina had
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developed wonderful friends with others from youth group and made much better friends at
school, too. She still worked on Aster lovingly sharing Jesus and the blessings of walking with
Him instead of trying to find happiness in unsatisfying ways Aster had tried. Tina didn’t think
Aster ever really listened with any more interest than to challenge her in some way or other.
One day walking out from school past the parent pick up line, next to the street in front of
the school heading for the bus line, Tina tried again. “You know, Aster, the Bible says that the
fool says in his heart that there is no God. All your arguments and challenges to me are really
challenges to God and declare you a fool.” As soon as she said it, she realized that this was
probably too bold, even if true, but it really made Aster mad, madder than she had ever been
before.
“You holy rolling, Bible thumping, judgmental jerk! Who do you think you’re calling a
fool? You are just a weakling leaning on some hopeless fantasy to keep from living in a real
world!” And with that she angrily gave Tina a shove that knocked her off balance right into the
street, and into the line of student drivers racing away from the high school. Brakes squealed, but
the high school driver was moving too fast to be able to stop or avoid the body lunging in his
path. He struck Tina knocking her into the opposing line of traffic where she was further crushed
before anyone could stop.
The regular school bus stopped at the corner as usual, but Tina did not get off. That was
odd. No, she was not pulling her old tricks. So, what was up? Laura sat by the phone expectantly,
but not hysterically, waiting on a phone call from Tina telling her she had missed the bus for
some reason or had an unscheduled tutoring session and was asking that she be picked up. The
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phone did ring and Laura picked it up with relief. Then she heard the message from the other end
of the line, “There’s been an accident at the school. Tina is at Medical City Hospital.”
Laura didn’t hear anything else. She raced for her purse stopping only long enough to call
Monty and tell him to meet her at the hospital. Crying, praying, and driving faster than she knew
she should, she sped to the hospital emergency room. She parked in the emergency spaces and
raced into the waiting room. Monty was already there. He caught her and told her, “Tina was hit
by a car, Love. The doctors are examining her right now. It is bad. That is all I know. They will
come get us as soon as they have more word.”
They waited anxiously hoping any nurse, doctor or orderly who walked by would bring
them news on Tina. Why wouldn’t they let them see her? Why couldn’t they go stand at her
bedside? They vacillated between anger, dread and frustration. Numb with fear, the couple
waited and prayed for the daughter they almost had. It seemed like an eternity as they watched
other anxious visitors and saw everyone lurch whenever someone dressed in white appeared
from the door. At last they saw a physician walk in their direction. It appeared that someone
finally had word for them on Tina’s condition. The doctor came over and compassionately said,
“I am so sorry. We did everything we could do.”
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CHAPTER 5—ALASKA
They had never planned a funeral. How was that part of the foster parenting experience?
The agency helped, but it was the most difficult thing they had ever done. The preacher from
their church offered a very consoling message to friends and family who loved and would miss
this precious young lady. He also shared Tina’s tremendous faith in a loving and forgiving God
who accepted her just as she was and took her home to be with Him. They would see her again.
The chapel was filled with students and teachers from the high school as well as many youth
group friends and other church members. Even neighbors and the bus driver were in attendance.
Wonderful church members provided a meal for friends and loved ones of the family
back at their house. That was a bitter sweet time as so many friends and teachers shared with
Monty and Laura about the wonderful girl Tina truly had been and especially had become.
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Everyone had seen such a drastic transition in her and been impacted by her faith experience.
Even Cody was there with other seniors from his group at school and church. Tina’s sister was
able to join them as college exams had just been finished. She brought her fiancé with her and
shared him with the new parents Tina almost had. Damaris had been so happy for all of them at
the prospect of an adoption, but now she had to deal with the death of yet another family
member. Monty and Laura’s hearts broke for her. They prayed that Devin would be strong
enough to walk his girl through the additional misery she was experiencing.
Days ahead, of course, were miserable, but they clung to their faith and allowed precious
friends once again to walk with them through new grief. Monty knew that Laura needed
significant healing, especially if they were ever going to be able to move on from this huge
additional loss in their lives. He had accrued more vacation time at work than he had used, so he
secretly contacted his company’s travel agency and arranged an Alaskan cruise for the two of
them. It would leave in about a month.
He called Laura and told her not to fix dinner for them that night as he wanted to take her
out to dinner. There was no indication that there was anything more up his sleeve than a nice
meal and a night out. He did not indicate where he wanted to take her. That was to be a secret.
Why all the mystery? She dismissed the thoughts and simply dressed for a moderately dressy
occasion so that she would not be terribly overdressed or underdressed for wherever he had
planned. He took her to a new restaurant in Addison named Sicily’s, further away from home
than he usually did. This place was new to Laura. Actually, since she had never heard of it
before, that made the experience even more enjoyable. She really needed a change of pace and
atmosphere, and this would accomplish that well.
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The menu had a variety of European selections, only a few of which she even had an idea
of what they were or what went into them. She found her adventurous spirit and took a stab into
the dark ordering entrée number seven. She could not pronounce it or imagine what it would be,
but she was willing to go for it. Artichokes and salmon were always high on her food choice list,
so it had to be good. While they waited for their entrees to arrive and enjoyed their salads, their
talk was light and almost cheery. They resumed their normal dinnertime agenda of sharing the
day’s events, trying desperately to hang on to optimistic events to share. They kept world issues
to the unexpectedly milder weather for Texas in the late spring which always really felt like
summer in their locale, but they knew the blistering heat was not far away. Monty found some
entertaining and almost comical bits of gossip from his workplace that evoked a small smile
from his bride’s face. That felt so good to both of them.
Their entrees arrived and there were more oohs and aahs than actual conversation for the
ensuing minutes. What conversation they had was safely distant from the current pain of life and
focused on the culinary experience before them right now. Full and completely satiated, when
the waiter arrived asking if he could bring them dessert, Laura immediately began shaking her
head to indicate that dessert was not needed, but before she could voice her refusal, Monty
indicated that they would, indeed, like a dessert, the house special. She was unaware there was a
dessert house special, but then the restaurant was new to her, and maybe Monty knew something
she did not. Her man was puzzling her, but that was something else she adored about him. He
was never boring!
In quick order, the attention of the entire house was caught by a sparkler laden tray held
high above the head of a waiter headed directly for their table. Right in front of Laura’s place he
set a flaming, sparkling Baked Alaska Flambé. She had never eaten the ice dream delicacy
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before and wondered if she would be able to find room in her stomach to enjoy it. She would
certainly try. It was so lovely that she thought maybe she would rather just gaze at it than eat it.
Monty assured her that the ice cream would only wait so long before it would succumb to room
temperature, so she consented to dive in. As the waiter cut the lovely concoction into pieces, he
placed a decorative small card holder into her piece before placing it before her. Monty did not
get one. Puzzled again, she opened the tiny envelope and gasped as she saw a homemade coupon
that Monty had made on his computer for a one-week, all-expense paid cruise to the Inside
Passage from Vancouver to Skagway, ALASKA. Now, the unnecessary dessert really made sense.
They were going to Alaska! Speechless, she beamed and then gushed tears as she reached over
and gave the love of her life a rib-crushing hug. How good this man was to her! They would fly
from DFW International Airport to Vancouver, British Columbia, in just 27 days, spend the night
in downtown Vancouver and then board their ship the following afternoon. She knew what she
would be doing for the next few weeks. It would be a legitimate opportunity and excuse for
shopping sprees to prepare for the summer weather in Alaska that would call for clothing so
different from her summer in Texas wardrobe.
She called her BFFs and arranged shopping trips, a hair styling appointment, a pedicure,
a facial, an all day spa treatment, and a massage just for good measure. She was truly pampered
all the way. Her pain was never far below the surface, but Monty’s generous offer was really
distracting her and helping her out of the pit that her life had become. Much time with faithful
friends also helped. Of course, since she got to enjoy her own pampering, she did not have a very
hard time convincing her friends to join her.
With suitcases packed with all the new purchases stowed, Laura thought she finally was
really ready to head to Alaska.
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At last, the departure day arrived. They were sure they had tucked their passports into
Laura’s purse, secured their house, notified neighbors and their security alarm company that they
would be gone for a little over a week and headed to the airport.
Their flight departed late morning, but already the Dallas July heat was well into the 90s,
promising triple digits before nightfall. How glad she was that she would not be around to
experience that blessing! They grabbed some sandwiches and fruit to eat on the flight and settled
into the waiting area seats to anxiously wait for their flight to be called. At last their flight was
ordered to board and they relaxed into their seats. The next time their feet touched the ground
would be in Canada! A few hours later they stepped off the plane to 73 degree weather. And that
was the heat of the day!
“Oh, I like Vancouver already,” she exclaimed.
A taxi took them to their hotel right in downtown. Due to the time change the local time
made it way too early for them to eat dinner. So, they stowed their lugged in their hotel room and
donned their hiking shoes to set out to explore Vancouver. They bought tickets for a local tourist
tram that took them to see all of the special attractions, and they fell in love with the city. Their
time was short, so they didn’t have the opportunity to investigate the sights as Laura would have
wished, but her mind was full of fascinating experiences and almost void of feelings and
thoughts of their loss. Sunset fell later than their internal timers would coordinate, so they turned
in early for the night anticipating the ocean voyage ahead of them the following day.
They had planned to take the departure day leisurely, without rush or stress as their cruise
ship didn’t depart until 4:00 PM, but they were both so excited that they went ahead and checked
out of the hotel and boarded the boat as soon as it opened up for passengers at 1:00 PM. They
were glad they had decided to do so as there were pre-departure activities they had not known
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about. There was a fantastic tour of the entire ship even into areas restricted to passengers once
they were out at sea, some early refreshments, and time to casually meet some of the ship’s crew
who would be too busy to chat once they were underway. They even got to meet the performers
who would provide the comical and musical entertainment shows in the evenings. The couple
smiled more than they had in a long time. When it neared departure time, they headed back to
their cabin and sat outside on their balcony to watch as they almost unperceptively eased away
from the dock, and Vancouver slowly disappeared from sight. It was the most peaceful and
relaxing feeling Laura could remember. They gazed into the beautiful, blue sky and ocean waters
and praised God for the beauty of His creation and gratitude for this interlude.
Very soon after departure the entire passenger body was called to a mandatory evacuation
drill. They recalled this from their honeymoon Caribbean cruise. They donned life vests and
proceeded to their indicated crisis station where life boats were stored. Along with all other
passengers they received instructions on how to handle an emergency at sea. It was a spooky
experience and one they hoped and prayed would not be put into use.
It reminded them of the hymn It Is Well with My Soul by Horatio Spafford. In the late
1800’s Spafford had dealt with immense tragedy. His son had died of scarlet fever in 1870. The
Chicago Fire of 1871 had ruined him financially as he owned a great deal of property that lay in
ruins along the Chicago lakefront after the ravages of the flames. He had planned to travel to
Europe with his family in 1873, but in a late change of plans, he sent his wife and four daughters
on ahead of him by sea. Their ship collided with another vessel and sank with only his wife
surviving. The famous telegram, “Saved alone,” was notice to him of this newest, tragic loss.
When he sailed to meet his grieving wife and passed near the location where his daughters had
perished, he penned the words to the famous hymn.
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When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well with my soul.
What a testimony to dealing with terrible loss with faith. Monty and Laura needed that.
God had even used Spafford’s tremendous loss to the good of countless Christians who regularly
sang his inspiring hymn. They still hoped the survival drill would remain nothing more than that,
just a preparatory practice.
That being put aside, they were free to really begin cruising. Before their scheduled
dinner reservation, the couple found an appealing place on deck to sit in lounge chairs, enjoy the
wonderful ocean aroma and listen to the mesmerizing sound of the ship cutting through the
beautiful water. They people-watched and discreetly commented as varieties of people passed
their way. They could see obvious honeymooners with more stars in their eyes than the Atlantic
sky above them. They saw elderly, retired couples who still had stars in their eyes for each other.
They saw young women and young men with searching eyes who probably hoped to find the
love of their lives in the next 8 days. There were tour groups and some small groups of friends
who just apparently chose to venture to sea together. Then there were the families of every
shape, size, and description effervescent with anticipation of the fun days ahead. These brought a
sad note as Laura was reminded of her loss once again. Family, just what did God have in store
for them in this regard?
After some pensive time Laura queried, “Monty, if Tina had lived, do you think we
would have ever had any more foster children in our home?”
“Oh, Laura, I hadn’t thought about that. Probably not, I guess. What do you think?”
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“I don’t think so. Troubled children create a degree of angst that is part of helping them,
but I don’t know that such a climate in our home would have created the most stable home
atmosphere for Tina. She still had a long way to go in dealing with the loss of her parents. I think
she would have needed more stability and more dedication from us than we could have given her
if we had brought more children in.”
“I bet you are right. Maybe God still has other children in line for us. I am not saying that
He took Tina from us, but I can see where He might use this loss of our precious daughter once
again for His good in giving us the ability to take in more children through which we can serve
Him.”
“That is what I think I am hearing Him say, Monty. I have had a hard time hearing Him
at all these past few weeks. I have been so self-absorbed in my pain, but out here in the majesty
of His creation, I think I hear Him speaking again.”
“I have been praying for our broken hearts to heal and our ears to hear from Him once
more. I think He is faithfully doing just that. We have a full week to make much of prayer asking
Him to direct us in this.”
It was time for dinner and then the first night’s entertainment. The lively music,
flamboyant costumes and energetic dancers made for a delightful evening. The gentle swaying of
the ship rocked them into peaceful slumber as they rejoiced in their surroundings and in hearing
the voice of God once again.
In the days ahead, they stopped at ports where they toured, shopped, and tried
adventurous activities they had not done before. They zip lined in Ketchikan. They kayaked and
saw bald eagles in Juneau. The ship detoured into Glacier Bay where they could view glaciers up
close and personal and see seals lazing around on small pieces of glaciers that had broken off of
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the main edifice. They took a chartered boat from Skagway out into the Atlantic and whale
watched. After returning from viewing those amazing, massive mammals, they rambled around
the streets of the tiny town taking in life in the 50th state. They marveled that they actually
needed jackets due to the temperatures, and here it was July! How different it was here from the
lower United States they were accustomed to. Apparently the 600 indigenous population in this
small seaside village during the winter months was swamped not only with tourists from the
many cruise ships that stopped here during the warm months but was also swamped with
temporary workers who migrated north from the Lower 48 for summer employment in the
multitude of shops and excursion businesses.
“Now, that would be a fun way for college students to spend time off from school,” they
shared.
But as they walked along, they came to a sight that set them back on their heels. Here in a
rather small clearing was a park that was jammed with lodgings for these migrant workers. Tent
City revealed many of these transplant workers living in corrugated box enclosures, some flimsy
tents and even a few who dwelt in lean-to facilities constructed with nothing more than shower
curtains. Okay, maybe this was not the exciting summer job they had first considered, but then
they saw something that broke their hearts. This colony was also inhabited by families. There
were children running around and living in this squalor. God pricked their hearts again that a
safe, warm, loving home for needy children was still their calling.
The return trip to Vancouver was all ocean voyage with no more ports of call, so time
was devoted to swimming, tanning, eating, and ship activities. During the lazy hours at sea
relaxing on chaise lounges the couple had much time to further process their loss and their
direction once they returned to Texas, both individually and mutually. When they saw toddlers
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with attendant parents keeping their children safe around the water with the little ones shrieking
with wonder and delight, they were reminded of little Justine and how she had also loved the
water. They thought of her again when they watched older children tirelessly thrill to the water
slides. They thought of Tina when they passed the music and dancing floors dedicated to
teenagers. They had been blessed to offer these children the gift of laughter. These girls had
laughed and grown in their presence. They wondered just how Justine and her mother were
faring these days. The couple had dependably sent birthday and Christmas gifts to Justine each
year, and Diara had been faithful to write them thank you notes for their remembrances and to
fill them in on Justine’s activities of recent days, but the letters had gotten briefer and finally
became only a store-bought Hallmark Thank You So Much for Your Kindness card signed by
Diara. They knew it was a good thing that Justine and her mother had moved on. Monty and
Laura needed to let go even further and allow them to leave their former foster parents in their
wake. Monty and Laura had been taught this in their fostering training. No matter how much the
foster children came to love the temporary families, if they could return home many times they
just needed to cut off all ties with those years away from birth families. It was the way it had to
be.
Steaming back into port in Vancouver was a mellow time leaving the paradise experience
behind and returning to the real world. How different the modern Vancouver looked from the
rustic Alaska they had visited. They passed through customs without too much delay and then
took the shuttle back to the airport for the flight home. It was time to re-engage in life.
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CHAPTER 6--HOWARD
When the agency called again, this time they had a boy in mind. His name was Howard.
He had been in numerous foster homes and once again was in need of a new placement. He was
convinced no one wanted him and from his history one could understand why he thought this
way. He had no real physical limitations, but he was somewhat slow, and many foster families
had just felt like he was a disappointment, so they moved him on. He had been retained in school
back in third grade, so he was twelve but only in the fifth grade. That made him older and bigger
than the rest of the elementary students, but this only accentuated his awkwardness. His
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advanced age and size did not add to his athletic prowess, though because he had none. He wore
heavy glasses, spoke with a slight impediment that could have been corrected early on but was
glossed over or missed due to his various placements. He knew he was a reject and a failure and
dumb. This would be a challenge of an altogether different sort, but God had called them to love
the unlovely, to take children no one else wanted. This child certainly seemed to fit that category.
They had felt as if God wanted them to help children who could hopefully return to their
biological homes and family one day, but Howard would be an exception to this. This poor boy
truly did not have anyone on the face of the earth who wanted him. Mom and Dad were long
gone and had abandoned him years ago. Other relatives were so dysfunctional that the agency
would never consider letting Howard live with any of them. How could Monty and Laura turn
him down? He deserved one more chance at having a family. Monty and Laura would give it
their best shot by sharing a godly home with him. It would take a lot of prayer. This was one
foster child they might well have until he reached 18 and aged out of the system and possibly
even beyond.
“Hi, Howard, my name is Laura.”
“And mine is Monty.”
“I know,” he flatly replied.
“We are so glad to have you become a part of our family,” added Laura.
“I know this is just another foster home. I don’t have a family.”
Typical of most foster children, he arrived with very little. They moved him into the
yellow room but soon changed the curtains and wall décor to make it more boyish.
“I hope you like yellow,” indicated Laura. “I know the curtains and pictures on the wall
are girly, so we will gladly change them out. What would you like in their place?
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“I don’t care. Nothing would be fine with me.”
“Well, what things are you interested in? We could try some sort of boyish theme. How
about sports, outdoors, science, riding bicycles, motorcycles, books, music, animals?” Laura
tried desperately.
“I do like fish.”
The case worker added that he had always liked going to the aquarium.”
“Then an ocean motif it will be,” added Monty.
The three of them headed to the mall to decide on just what would turn the yellow room
into an aquarium theme. Howard lent no input on the purchases but just passively walked beside
them or even behind them as they tried to choose decorations that might make Howard feel at
home.
He seemed to like the results, as much as he showed that he liked anything. They bought
him a small aquarium that he was allowed to have in his bedroom. Though he never smiled at it,
he did spend a lot of time just sitting in front of it staring at the various fish as they maneuvered
around the plants and the simulated pirate’s chest and sunken ship.
He ate with the family at meals, but his choice of foods was extremely limited. Pop tarts
were for breakfast. Peanut butter and jelly only on white bread for lunch. Kool Aid to drink.
Pizza, corn dogs, hamburgers, or macaroni and cheese for dinner. Vanilla wavers or lollipops for
desert. No wonder the boy was so skinny. He would probably contract rickets from malnutrition
from his horrible diet! He rarely entered into real conversation. He was locked in his despair.
He still slept with a ratty blanket that had come from some family several placements
past. It seemed to be the only thing of comfort in his desolate world.
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Laura enrolled him in the local elementary with as much enthusiasm as she could muster,
“Howard, some years ago I had another foster daughter who attended this school and she really
loved it. I’m sure some of the teachers will be different, but I hope we get a really nice one for
you.” The look he gave her was not angry, just rather skeptical. He had known too many teachers
and had serious doubts that this one would be a fairy godmother.
He thus began school with obvious dread and belief that here he would fail once again.
He had the same expectation about living with Monty and Laura. He was sure they would
eventually move him on, too. He had no intention or probably any ability to bond with them. He
did not even try. He did not notice their attempts at trying.
They bought him a bicycle that sat in the garage. The three of them went to a park to toss
a ball around, but it ended up with just Monty and Laura tossing the ball, and Howard sitting on
some nearby rock playing with a stick. They tried watching television together, but he was never
interested, even if the choice was from the Disney channel, sci-fi, or Animal Planet. Laura tried
to interest him in helping her cook, but other than making his own PBJ sandwiches, he had no
interest. Monty tried to include him in yard work or simple household repairs. How could any
one boy be so disinterested in everything?
He rode the elementary bus that the district provided from the school he attended that
stopped at Justine’s and Tina’s corner. Almost from the beginning he was bullied. He did not
report it. He was used to it.
Laura volunteered at his school every opportunity she could to try to be involved in his
life and demonstrate her commitment to him. She became a teacher’s helper by volunteering
twice a week to take a few of the teacher’s lowest math students into the library and play some
math games to help them with basic skills. Math and finance had been her thing, so it was a good
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fit. Howard, of course, was always a participant. At least he was always one chosen to be a part,
but he didn’t participate in any of the activities that Laura suggested.
“Hey Kids, let’s play some guessing games. Let’s say that you Mary Ann have 12 dogs
and each of them have 2 puppies. Now how many dogs do you have?” After everyone stopped
laughing one would answer her.
“Twenty-four, but that is crazy for anyone to have that many dogs!”
“Then Howard had 48 pickles, but he wanted to share them with his three friends, too, so
how many pickles did each person get?”
“One girl answered 16, but then another student reminded her that Howard would get
pickles also, so each person would get 12.”
“Good job, Marva! That is good listening.” Howard just sat there not even interested
when Laura used him as one of her examples. The group played board games, did puzzles, races,
and simulated baseball and football games. Howard either lost at the game, got the answers
wrong or sat idly by barely listening to what was going on.
Laura sent cupcakes and favors at holiday events. She would let Howard help bake them,
but he would lose interest as soon as the cupcake papers were placed into the baking pan, so she
would have to finish them herself. She could not get him to help ice the cupcakes or even lick the
beaters. They weren’t lollipops or vanilla wafers, so they were not on his preferred diet list. She
offered to collect and sort the canned goods his class collected for the Thanksgiving basket. She
told him she needed a strong, strapping man to help with such a task, but he had carried one can
at a time for only a minute or two, then had gone to sit down until she was finished.
She went along on field trips. He never showed much emotion one way or the other that
she was attending. It was okay that she went but no big deal. It was on the mid-semester field trip
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that she saw with her own eyes for the first time what he had been experiencing for months. The
name calling and insults were horrible. The bullies knew enough to say and do their damage out
of the teachers’ and administration’s ears, but they did not seem to mind that his foster mom
heard. After all she was only his foster mom, not a real mom like they had. She wouldn’t care,
but care she did! No one was going to call Howard a wimp and dummy if she had anything to
say about it. And she did say something about it.
“Mrs. Silverton, are you aware of what several of your students are calling Howard when
they are out of your earshot? The things they are saying are just horrible, really bullying. I am
most upset to hear what is going on. I see that they wait until your back is turned or they are far
enough away from you for you to be unaware of what is going on, but it is happening. I heard it
with my own ears, and it really must stop.”
His teacher asked her who the culprits were and assured her she would speak to the
culprits. It did no good. They continued their assaults when the teacher’s back was turned. Laura
told the principal who said he would speak to the students’ teachers, but she knew where that had
already gotten her. She spoke to the parents of the culprits that she could find, but they pretty
much assured her that their children would never say or do any such unkind thing and labeled her
as a problem parent. She felt like such a failure to Howard. God, help.
Poor Howard was trapped. Monty and Laura worked with him trying the “Sticks and
stones can hurt my bones, but words can never hurt me” routine knowing fully well that this
saying was a lie. Words hurt more and longer than sticks and stones. They showed him Bible
stories of men who had endured some terribly difficult times, hoping he would find strength
there. Pretty heavy for a 12-year-old boy. They regularly prayed with him that the boys and girls
would see the error of their ways and that he could forgive them and not harbor resentment in his
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heart. They tried to teach him how to kindly but assertively ask them to stop. He had no
backbone to even try to speak to the bullies.
They encouraged him to find one boy who could be his friend. He had been unsuccessful
in finding anyone. He probably didn’t even know how to try. They scanned the neighborhood for
someone to befriend their son. They did find one third grade boy down the street who had
cerebral palsy. They talked to his mom and invited him to join them on one of their regular trips
to the Fair Park Aquarium. They bought the boys ice cream on the way home. The friendship did
not take. Howard would not allow any other child inside his walls. He really did not like ice
cream anyway. It also was not on his preferred food list. Their help felt feeble and impotent.
They worked with him nightly on schoolwork until they realized he dreaded coming
home almost as much as going to school, if all it was going to be was more schoolwork, so they
backed off and limited the study sessions to no more than an hour a night with weekends
skipped.
Each season they had tried to interest him in city sports for whatever was available. They
wanted to give him success and enjoyment that his life lacked. They tried soccer, but he was not
aggressive enough to ever get close enough to the ball to get a kick in. He would get kicked in
the shin even with the shin guards on and recede to the sidelines. They tried baseball, but he
struck out almost every time, and the few times he barely connected, the ball went foul. He could
not catch and could only barely throw. Basketball was no good as he was not coordinated enough
to dribble, and his ball shots never were high enough to even reach the rim. The other players
and even some of the parents berated him for his terrible skills, never encouraging him to even
try again. They knew better than to suggest football. It was obvious that he would not endure a
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contact sport. Enough for sports camps. So went fifth grade. On to sixth grade and middle
school. Lord, help.
That summer they tried music lessons, but his coordination was no good on the piano
either and he didn’t seem to be able to carry a tune in a bucket, so singing was another flop.
Reading music proved to be an impossibility. Okay, art. Anyone can do some sort of art.
Whatever he created would be celebrated. It would be displayed at home and relished as success
regardless of what the product looked like, but he spilled the paint, broke the lead too often on
the colored pencils, got the glitter and charcoal all over the floor and dropped and broke the
ceramics. The leader suggested he leave.
The next year having only barely passed into sixth grade, Laura watched him daily get off
the bus with no friends or else with other children who would laugh at him and find something to
tease him about. She became a mother hen trying to protect her boy, but he never seemed to
notice. Her success in protecting him was meager to none. He just took the kids’ derisive
behavior toward him as standard. Laura met with his teachers and told them she would support
her child and the teachers in any way she could. The teachers were great about posting their
weekly assignments on regular newsletters, so Laura could be sure Howard worked on them
even if he did not make it home with what work or the textbooks needed to accomplish the tasks.
They spent every afternoon until Monty got home from work attempting his school work. Laura
tried to make it fun and tried to incorporate what part of it she could into their family time, so it
would not seem like drudgery to him. To him it was drudgery anyway. Once Monty was home,
school work was laid aside and they tried to have an enjoyable family evening. Nothing worked.
With multiple teachers now, his lack of organization skills blossomed. He was once again
failing miserably. Laura saw to it that he did his homework, but getting it to school was another
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matter. He seemed incapable of even finding it in his backpack once he got to school. Getting it
to the right class was almost an impossibility. His grades were abysmal. He was not going to
pass again. The school would not or could not retain him a second time, so it was suggested that
he attend an alternative school the following year. He knew that new school was the dummy
school. No one could convince him otherwise. Surely Monty and Laura tried. What would
seventh grade hold for him?
To make home life enjoyable, they regularly attempted playing family games with him,
but even though they tried to lose, most of the time Howard succeeding in losing in spite of their
efforts. Regardless, if not losing at the competition, he would lose interest quickly and go sit in
his yellow room to watch the fish. They took him to the pet store regularly to buy new fish, but
he knew they would most likely die anyway, so he didn’t care which ones they bought. He was
used to getting the fish net and scooping out the dead ones that floated to the top of the tank and
unemotionally disposing of them in the bathroom toilet.
The teachers in his Sunday school class were not malicious to him, but middle school
children can be mean even in church. Middle school is a very hard time for any boy or girl.
Those youth showed no mercy or grace to Howard. He could not remember the Bible verses or
answer questions about Bible stories correctly, so he knew he failed Sunday school, too.
Monty took him fishing and knew or at least hoped that some man to man time out on the
lake in a boat would be a winner. Howard was afraid to touch the worms, but Monty was glad to
bait the hooks for him. Howard kept getting his line caught on some rock or other debris in the
water and finally dropped his fishing pole over the side into the lake ending the fishing
excursion. Monty feebly tried just boating around the lake for a while, but Howard was not into
it. He would rather watch fish than try to capture them or, heaven forbid, to eat them!
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The only thing he seemed to enjoy was going to the Fair Park Aquarium. He would walk
around silently but was captivated by the various fish. He seemed to love the variety of shapes
and amazing colors. The sharks at the aquarium scared him, but he was actually delighted and
even smiled at the manta ray tank when visitors were actually allowed to reach into the tank and
touch the live rays as they swam by. Their stingers had been removed making the experience a
safe and enjoyable one. Animals can reach children when people cannot. He loved watching the
turtles especially, so Monty bought a small turtle to add to his aquarium at home. They suggested
Howard name his turtle, but he could not think of any good names. It became known simply as
Turtle.
They tried giving Howard more good animal experiences, but petting zoo animals
generally scared him. The animals, even the babies, were too big and were surely going to hurt
him. Those animals had teeth, hooves and sometimes horns that sent him fleeing, and he really
did not like getting dirty from them. Nothing they tried seemed to work at all.
Seventh grade was at the alternative school. Those students all knew they were rejects.
By that time most had developed serious chips on their shoulders. Howard was fourteen now,
still a skinny, uncoordinated slow learner, but he had finally had enough of the bullying and
demeaning treatment. He began fighting back. Oh, it was passive at first. He stole from any and
every one. He was not very good at it, so he generally got caught. He took erasers from students
who walked to the front of the room to sharpen a pencil. He grabbed pens or pencils when
students left their desks to turn in their work. He pilfered sweaters or jackets that students left on
the back of their chairs if they left the room for a bathroom break. He robbed or smashed desserts
in the lunchroom if a student went to pick up a straw or spoon. Of course, he would not eat them,
but he seemed to find pleasure in upsetting everyone else. He knocked books out of students’
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hands when they were in the hall. He tossed soap or water on other boys in the bathrooms. The
school would not tolerate his behavior. Detentions and in-school suspensions became regular
occurrences. He didn’t care. His docile, flat affect was taking on insolence and rebellion. Their
talking to him still fell on deaf ears.
He even stole from Monty and Laura. Money would disappear from Laura’s purse or
from Monty’s change holder on his bedroom chest of drawers. They had no idea what he planned
to do with the money. He never had anything he wanted to buy even when he went to stores with
one of them. Pens, pencils, erasers, scissors, markers, staplers, tape and other office supplies
regularly turned up missing. Food periodically disappeared but only from his approved dietary
list. They tried not to add to all of his negative experiences by scolding or disciplining him for
these infractions, but they could only watch him so much. They got to where anything of value in
their home was kept under lock and key or kept in their bathroom at night, so he could not get to
it. Missing things with negligible value were simply overlooked.
Even though this school established a curriculum individually for each student and had
numerous teachers’ aides to assist the classroom teachers, Howard continued to do very poorly
academically. He was not all that slow; he simply did not care and could find no reason to try.
Toward the end of the school year, another multi-disciplinary IEP was scheduled for Howard. In
addition to the school’s principal and homeroom teacher, Howard’s agency case worker, the
school counselor, special education coordinator, district gate keeper for entry into all special
programs and a few other official looking individuals from the administrative office were in
attendance to discuss with Monty and Laura what school placement would be in Howard’s best
interest for the following year. No matter how educators had tried to implement his Individual
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Education Plan, he succeeded only in failing to meet benchmarks and standards and was
becoming more and more of a problem student behaviorally.
So, eighth grade was going to be another change, this time to a behavior modification
school. Now these were very troubled kids. Violence, melt downs and physical take-downs for
seriously disruptive behaviors from these students were daily occurrences. Howard’s passive
aggressive behavior shifted to aggressive-aggressive. He couldn’t win a fight with any of the
other boys, so he went after the girls. He would pull their hair, grab their work and destroy it or
trip them just for the fun of it. He elbowed any girl walking near him during passing periods. A
saucy girl laughed at him one day when he tried to give an oral book report, so he slapped her
face on the way to lunch. When a teacher called him on his behavior toward the girl, he shoved
the teacher into the wall. That got him sent to the juvenile detention center for three weeks.
Monty and Laura visited him every time it was allowed and continued to try to show him
unconditional love. They determinedly prayed with him and shared with him that Jesus loved
him and wanted a relationship with him. Their message continued to fall on deaf ears. They felt
so impotent. God, where are you?
Laura thought that maybe she could and should home school him. Faith Agency was a
Christian organization, but it still had to abide by state laws, and foster children could not be
home schooled. So much for that idea.
Ninth grade came and with it high school problems. Howard was now sixteen. Even
behavior modification schools tried to have sports and used them to encourage desired behavior
from the students. Of course, the athletics did not work with Howard. He simply could not find
anything at which he could succeed. He fell further and further behind academically, even with
the special curriculum that was used with him to try to give him a degree of success. He knew he
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was dumb. He could barely read and math was a disaster. Like other children before him in
Monty and Laura’s home, he attended church with the couple but continued to fail at Sunday
school and youth group. He listened dispassionately during the worship/preaching services. They
hoped seeds were planted but had serious doubts.
Since Howard was now sixteen and old enough to get a part-time job, Monty and Laura
discussed with the case worker the idea of employment. It was approved. A neighbor and good
friend of the couple was district manager for a chain of fast food restaurants and agreed to let
Howard take a stab at working fast food.
“Hey, Howard,” Monty began, “how would you like to get a job now that you are 16?
You could make some money of your own and either buy something you want or Laura could
help you open up a bank account, so you could save it up for something special or for your
future.”
“Sure, Howard, I’d be glad to go down to the bank with you and open up an account just
in your name, so you could watch your money grow. Wouldn’t that be a great experience?”
Howard took the notice of offering him a job without either acceptance or refusal. They
took that as a positive.
Laura instructed, “Remember, Howard, your boss will not tolerate any acts of aggression
or rebellion or you will lose your job. Just do the best you can. I will pick you up from school
and drive you to work the days you are on the schedule.” This did not seem to impress him, but
he had never failed at a job before, so maybe this new experience would be a success for him.
Front counter work was not a good idea, because his interpersonal skills were so weak.
He did nothing destructive on the job, but he was very slow to get the hang of the fry cooker, the
drink dispenser, or the soft serve machine. They shifted him to restocking straws and napkins,
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getting packages of buns from the storage room, table clean-up and sweeping. With a minimal
degree of success here, he actually got a few pay checks, which Laura helped him save by
putting the money into a bank by depositing it into a savings account with his name on it. He
never had anything he wanted to buy with the money, but Laura thought this was good training
for him anyway. She hoped he’d see this money as a successful experience in his life.
Then a couple of students from his school dropped by one day. Name calling, laughing,
and insults followed which, while to be expected from his classmates, they were nevertheless
angering to Howard. He threw a wet mop into their midst and lost his job.
It was tenth grade and Howard was seventeen. Regardless of everything else of failure in
Howard’s life, he had noticed girls by this point. He had been mean to most of them, so he knew
no girl would ever be interested in him, but when the Christmas dance came along, a pretty, nice
girl from school actually asked him if they could go to the dance together. He could not have
been more dumbfounded. That really got his attention. He was excited, at least for Howard it was
excitement. Monty and Laura were elated as well. Copious preparations began. Monty took him
shopping for a special outfit, and he actually cared what it looked like. He wasn’t responsible
enough to be driving, so Monty would have to drive them, but all in all Howard was okay with
that. The three of them practiced and rehearsed proper etiquette and manners that he would need
to properly treat his date. Monty would coach and Laura would be the surrogate date. They
worked and worked trying to help him learn to dance. His two left feet made this a challenge. He
asked if he could get a corsage for the special young lady and, of course, Laura helped him pick
out a really pretty one she was sure would be a treat to the lucky girl. Laura took him for a
haircut just before the big day to be sure he looked his best for the event.
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Howard had gotten the girl to write down her home address to be sure he did not missrecord it. He showed it to Monty who assured Howard that he knew the neighborhood and could
find it with no difficulty. Howard was pleased that Monty also took his car to the car wash that
afternoon, so even the chariot would be fit for his queen. They picked up the special corsage just
an hour before time to leave to pick up his date. They needed it to be very, very fresh. No wilted
flowers would suffice this big event!
Finally, the time came to go pick up his date. A final look in the mirror confirmed
everything was in good condition. Laura gave an additional check and concurred. He was
stunning. This would be a successful occurrence for this poor boy. Right from the house, Howard
sat in the back seat, treating Monty like a chauffeur. Monty did not mind. Howard was in his
element and deserved every moment of it. Monty drove to the indicated house which he located
easily and directed Howard to go up to the door to call for his lady. They had practiced this at
home for days being sure he knew just how to be a gentlemen on such a special occasion. Monty
had the camera ready to snap a picture of the couple as they came back down the sidewalk before
entering the car. That picture would be enlarged and proudly displayed at home for all to see.
Howard stood tall and marched up to the door. He rang the doorbell expecting the girl to be
waiting and leap from the door as soon as it rang. Surely she was as excited as he was, but there
was a delay. Finally, the door opened and an unshaved, elderly man in dirty jeans and a
sleeveless undershirt appeared. “Boy, what can I do for you?”
“I’m here to pick up my date for the high school Christmas dance. I even have a pretty
flower corsage for her. Would you please tell her I am here?”
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“There’s no high school girl what lives here, boy. This here house belongs to the old
woman and me and has for nigh onto 35 years. You be on your way now.” And he closed the
door.
Never had such a crestfallen look appeared on his face before. Howard did not know
what to do. He stood there immobilized for a minute or more, then slowly turned and skulked
back to the car. Monty asked what was wrong and Howard replied, “She doesn’t live here.
There’s no date. I’m not going to the dance.”
“There must be some mistake, Howard. Let’s head home and give her a call. We must
have the wrong address.” With just a little bit of hope left, Howard resumed his position in the
back seat, holding gingerly to the precious corsage. Quickly Monty drove back home, hoping
somehow they could find a phone number for the mysterious young lady. Monty drove up to
their house and bounded out of the car headed indoors toward the phone. Laura sensed their
dismay when she saw the car return so quickly. Monty speedily relayed to Laura the devastating
developments, and she began searching the phone book looking for the girl’s last name but found
nothing anywhere nearby. They both tried to comfort Howard and assure him there had just been
some sort of mistake. They would be able to work this all out. Howard had not thought to get her
phone number from her before now. They were just about to start calling other students to see if
maybe one of them had her phone number when their own phone rang. Oh, maybe it was the girl
herself asking where Howard was and would give them another location from which he could
pick her up.
Monty indicated that Howard should answer the phone, so with trembling hands and
reluctance written all over his face, he picked up the phone hoping to hear a girl’s voice, but it
was not a girl’s voice on the end of the phone. It was male.
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“Gotcha Wimp. You just thought any girl would be interested in you. It was all a big
joke. Loser!” He could hear several boys and even some girls laughing in the background. Then
the phone went dead. So did Howard’s heart.
Laura and Monty vacillated between extreme anger at the cruelty of the prank and
broken-hearted sympathy for this poor boy whom they had tried to love and nurture for over five
years seemingly with no success. They had thought this date might be an opportunity to turn
things around. Now their hopes were dashed. His hopes were dashed. He crushed the flower in
his hand, turned and all but ran to his yellow bedroom, not allowing Monty and Laura to see the
tears in his eyes. They prayed for him like they never had before. They knew he needed time to
grieve. It was not a time to try to go talk to him. Directly, they sadly turned to go to bed
themselves, so unsure what they would say to him in the morning.
When morning came, Howard did not immediately get up. They fixed breakfast, ate and
waited for him to come out of his room until Monty sensed that something was wrong. He
knocked on the bedroom door but got no response so then he went into the yellow room to find
no Howard and that same window lock and replaced screen broken out once more. Howard was
gone.
They had been here before. They knew the drill. They called the case worker and told her
another foster child had run away or at least was gone for the present without their knowing his
whereabouts. They had absolutely no idea where he might have gone. She came over and after
hearing the sordid details of the previous night, they began calling families trying to find him.
After no success, they headed to neighbors asking if perhaps someone had seen him leaving that
morning.
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Down near the corner where the school buses picked up and dropped off students, one
elderly woman told them, “I know him from seeing him at the bus stop every day, so I saw him
walk by about seven o’clock this morning when I went out for my morning newspaper. I called
out to him to say hello, but he either didn’t hear me or just ignored me. He didn’t say anything at
all. He was walking past my house headed toward the shopping mall. I thought that was odd for
that time of morning, He was carrying his head very low, but there was a definite determination
in his step. I have no idea where he was heading.” She just pointed in the direction she had seen
him take.
The three got into Monty’s clean car and drove the short distance to the stores. It was
mid-morning now and the shops were all open. They split up and walked to the various
establishments asking if anyone had seen Howard. Each of the three adults carried a copy of the
current year’s school picture of Howard with them. They could not figure why he would head to
some store on a Saturday morning at such an early hour. The case worker asked at the hardware
store with no success. She looked for him in the toy store, but he was not there either. Laura saw
a pet store, and her optimism rose. Surely the call of the pets had lured him, but there was no
Howard. She skipped the perfume store and the nail salon, but gave the book store a try. No one
recognized the picture, but they searched every nook and cranny to be sure he was not hiding
somewhere with the books. Still no Howard. On Monty’s path, he questioned a convenience
store owner who had seen nothing. He saw a sporting goods store and realized that would be a
long shot as Howard found no interest in any sport, but he gave it a try anyway. No success. As
he walked further, Monty saw a U. S. Navy recruiting office, and his heart sank. He walked in
and showed the officer the picture of Howard asking if he had seen him that morning. The officer
confirmed Monty’s fears.
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“Yes, Howard has been calling us for quite a while to see what he needed to do to enlist.
He has been planning this on his own for quite some time. So, this morning he came in and
finalized his enlistment papers to join the Navy.”
His love of the ocean had been the only solace he had ever known, and he had followed
his heart to it. He was, after all, seventeen and eligible to enlist without parental approval now so
the decision was made all by himself. It was official, and the bus had already left heading him for
boot camp.
Dejectedly Monty headed back to find the women and tell them that Howard was indeed
gone and would not be returning. “God, go with him because he is out of our hands now.”
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CHAPTER 7--EVENA
Here was a girl who once again fit in with the goal God had indicated for the couple to
pursue with their foster children. Evena was the oldest of four children whose father was now
deceased.
He had been a good husband and father until the past few years when the call of the
roulette wheel had become too much for him. It had started innocently enough with only a Boy’s
Night Out at rotating friends’ houses. Then the group decided that the relatively short drive to
Oklahoma’s casinos offered more excitement and variety at the gambling house tables. Her
father’s hunger for the Big Win lead to his falsely calling in sick at work in order to head north
for the thrill of the roll of the dice. He got into financial trouble with the wrong people, and one
of them had broken his hand as a stiff warning that he had better pay up or else. That was when
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Evena’s mother found out about his gambling addiction. It began to tear the marriage and family
apart. Evena’s dad tried borrowing from other family members and friends and then depleted the
family’s savings account and retirement fund. He even closed out the small college savings
account funds each child had. Nothing seemed to get his attention. He continued his pursuit of
the casinos with ever more assurance that good luck was just around the corner for him. His
outstanding debts continued to escalate. Shortly thereafter, he met with what the police
determined was an unfortunate accident on highway #35 just south of the Oklahoma border and
was killed. His gambling lords had made their decisive move. While it was never confirmed, the
family knew his auto accident was the result of his gambling debt. The ones he owed so much
money to had made their point and gotten their justice.
The children’s mother fell apart and quickly turned to prescription drugs initially then
spun off to street drugs to self-medicate the immense depression the whole situation and her loss
left for her. Before long their house had fallen into foreclosure, and the remnant of the family
had been forced to move into a dumpy apartment and had been compelled to live off the meager
money Mom had been able to scrape up. All four children were removed from their mother’s
care when Mom’s drug abuse became severe enough that the children were filthy, unfed, and
rarely in school. Teachers had notified the authorities, so Family Services had been called in to
intervene, and various agencies were contacted to take custody of the children. Mom had been
ordered to a rehab facility.
The two little ones were easily placed with a young family who also had a young child.
The second sibling in birth order was a brother younger than Evena who went to a family with 2
other boys, so he fit in well with them. Evena was fifteen though, and teens were not so easily
placed. That made her just the fit for Monty and Laura, since they wanted to take children who
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were hard to place. Although Evena had been understandably traumatized by her father’s death
and her mother’s condition, she was mostly devastated to be separated from her siblings. She had
become more of a mother figure to them in the past months than their actual mother had been,
and she felt ripped of her baby cubs and angry as a mother bear. She had no intention of
cooperating with anyone who was a part of the debacle she considered the authorities had created
for her and her family. She hated her case worker, told them she refused to attend counseling
with the woman the agency would provide for her, and she decided Monty and Laura were on the
side of the enemy as well. She arrived cussing like a sailor and refusing any offer of concern or
sympathy from her new home. With the agency’s permission, Laura suggested that they would
wait a few days before enrolling Evena in school. Everyone could see that she needed some time
to adjust first.
Laura also knew that the children were to be provided sibling visits. That was standard
procedure and a very important issue when multiple children from one family were placed in
different foster homes. She recognized that Evena’s anger probably stemmed more from fear and
concern for her siblings than from being removed from her mother. The raging aggression at the
authorities she was spewing forth probably came from distress of what was happening to her
sister and brothers. Laura determined to try to win the teen over by coming alongside her and
addressing her concerns.
With obvious reluctance and mistrust in Evena’s fiery eyes, Laura told the girl, “Evena I
am going to try to arrange the first visit with your brothers and sister tomorrow to assure you of
their safety and security. Here is my plan. I am going to contact the coordinating organization
first thing in the morning and do what I can to set up immediate visits with the younger two and
your brother the same afternoon to hopefully ease your mind that they were okay.”
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It would take some powerful persuasion on Laura’s part to make that happen, but Laura
vowed to Evena she would give it her best shot.
Evena looked puzzled and softened just a bit before stomping off to the yellow room
avowing, “I won’t be tricked by you. You just think we will never see Mom again. She is a good
person and a great mother. She wasn’t doing anything wrong. You can’t keep us from her. You
pigs just think you know everything and can ruin people’s lives.”
Monty and Laura exchanged staggered looks, then looked to the case worker for help.
None was there. She had seen this type of behavior too many times before in other children. She
just asked them to sign the necessary papers and told them to call her with any concerns they
might have. She also gave them the name and phone number of the sibling visitation bureau and
the designated person who coordinated sibling visits. Laura would be on that first thing in the
morning.
Evena refused dinner that night but rose early the next morning and was fixing pancakes
for herself when Laura entered the kitchen. Clearly this girl knew more than your average
fifteen-year-old did in providing not only for herself but also for her younger brothers and sister.
“Good morning, Evena. I’m glad you found all the fixings for pancakes. Syrup is in the
pantry or powdered sugar and a sifter are on the lower shelf. That is how Monty likes his
pancake and waffles.”
Evena made no comment. Before even making a pot of coffee, Laura dialed the sibling
visit coordinator’s number in Evena’s sight and hearing and began her persuasive, assertive
attempt to line up visits for the children. This detail was not handled through Faith Children’s
Agency but by a Dallas County clearinghouse for all agencies and children in the area. The other
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children had been placed through other agencies which was often the case, so this coordinating
facility was provided.
“Good morning,” Laura began, “I need to speak to the person in charge of establishing
sibling visits for foster children,” she began.
“Do you have a foster child who has siblings in other homes from other agencies?”
“Yes, the children have been placed through different agencies.” She was put on hold.
Directly, a voice on the other end of the phone in a monotone voice conveyed, “These
arrangements take time, so someone should get back in touch with you in the next few days, no
longer than a week.”
“That is not acceptable,” Laura kindly but firmly stated. “I have promised our new
daughter that she would see her siblings today, and I intend to make this happen. The case
worker does not need to drive her. I will gladly take Evena to the other children’s houses. I only
need the names and addresses where the children are. I will call the other families and their case
workers if needed to make arrangements, but this needs to happen today.”
A bit taken aback, the woman on the other end of the phone told her, “I’ll have to put you
on hold again for a moment and will get right back to you.”
When Laura heard another voice, this time it was a man. “I am the visitation coordination
supervisor,” he informed her. “I understand you want information on the homes where your
foster child’s siblings are placed. That is confidential information and cannot immediately be
given to you. We have to get signed releases from the case workers from the other agencies and
also the other families involved before any of that information is revealed. It’s the law. We will
let you know when we can arrange the visits for you.”
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Feeling even more decisive than earlier but determined to hold her tongue and only speak
firmly, Laura replied, “That also is not acceptable. I thought you and we were in this to help the
children. The system and laws are to protect the youths, not to convenience the adults. We have a
very hurt and confused young teenage woman who needs to see the precious brothers and sister
she has been taking care of night and day to be sure they are alright, and this needs to happen
today. That is what fax machines are for. I suggest you or whomever the person is who needs to
generate the documents gets right on getting the forms into the proper hands. I will call you back
in one hour to set up the appointments with the families.”
When Laura set the phone down and turned to see her new ward, she saw a look of utter
amazement on Evena’s face. The teen had especially taken note of the word Laura had used to
describe her, young teenage WOMAN. Laura knew this girl was no more than a child herself, but
she had been handling an adult role for who knew how long and deserved respect instead of
being placated by being treated like a mere child.
Laura set her sights now toward starting that coffee. Then she asked Evena, “Would you
like orange juice with your pancakes? It is right there on the door in the refrigerator.” Then she
turned to head for their bathroom. “I’ll just be a few minutes. I am heading into the shower
before I fix Monty’s breakfast. Then I will get back on the phone to schedule those visits.” And
she left.
Laura had no idea just how Evena was interpreting the morning’s events, but she hoped
she had created a tiny crack in the girl’s rigid veneer. Evena’s siblings were very important to her
as they should be. Laura would need to come alongside the girl in this area and not appear as a
threat to what family unity still remained.
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Laura finished her shower, dressed and was fixing Monty’s breakfast when her husband
entered the kitchen.
Monty noticed Evena’s silence as he ate the scrambled eggs, bacon and toast and drank
his coffee that Laura had prepared for him. Did any teenage girls ever talk? They certainly did
among themselves if what he saw on television and heard from his friends was true, but here was
another teenage girl who had the gift of silence. It really made trying to build a relationship with
her very hard. If he spoke, he might say the wrong thing. If he kept silent, he might convey that
he didn’t want to get to know her. He only had to handle this perfectly, no pressure. Tina had
finally come around though. Maybe time would make Evena trust them and help her open up,
too.
Before Monty left for work, Laura reported the phone call fiasco to him deliberately in
Evena’s presence to underscore further how important it was to her to follow through on the
commitment she had made the previous evening, knowing it was equally important to Evena,
probably more so. It was interesting to them both that Evena did not retreat to her bedroom as
soon as she finished her pancakes. She remained speechless, but it appeared she was very
interested in watching the visitation developments first hand. Monty left for work and Laura
prepared herself for the next round of confrontations. When the hour was up, Laura took a deep
breath for courage and gusto and redialed the supervisor’s number.
“I need to speak to the visitation coordinator supervisor.”
She was diverted to a clerk, “I am his assistant and have been filled in on your urgent
request for visitation arrangements. The necessary documents are, in fact, floating through space
as we speak. They have been faxed with strict instructions that they are to be completed and
returned this morning. We can do nothing more.”
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Pleased, but not willing to reveal this, Laura told the clerk, “I will call again at 11:00 to
get the information I need to make two sibling visits come about this afternoon.”
Laura only glanced a sideways look at Evena but noticed a pleased look on the girl’s face
that these visits just might happen.
As promised, Laura said nothing to Evena about enrolling her in school immediately. She
would give the girl a few days to adjust before throwing her to the wolves of high school. While
they waited for the time for the next phone call, Laura showed Evena around the house and also
indicated where the laundry facilities were. Knowing Evena had cared for most of the children’s
needs at home, Laura wanted to let Evena know that she did not intend to treat her as a little girl.
Laura informed her, “I will gladly take care of your laundry if that is what you want, but
I’ll also share my appliances with you if you prefer the independence of doing your own washing
yourself.”
Laura added, “If you are ever interested in making dinner for the three of us sometime,
you are also welcome to do that. If you think of any groceries we would need for something you
want to cook, you may certainly add the needed food items to my shopping list, and I will
purchase them.” Evena just listened. At least the profanity was not an issue today. Thank God for
small blessings.
At eleven o’clock on the nose, Laura was back on the phone with the clerk who rather
timidly told her, “I have all the documentation on Evena’s brother, but we are still waiting for the
paperwork on the younger ones. However, just before you called, I contacted the outstanding
parties and reminded them of the impending deadline.”
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She gave Laura the name, address, and phone number for the family fostering Evena’s
brother. Laura would call them and set up the visit, then call the clerk back for the remaining
data.
Laura called Sylvia Marsh and immediately liked the woman. Sylvia had two sons of her
own; Beau was 10 and Karl was 8. Her husband was a hospital nurse and worked crazy hours,
but that would leave him home some days to spend good time with the three boys. He was home
today and would love to meet them. She gladly set up a time for Laura and Evena to come visit
at four o’clock, as that would allow time for them to get home from enrolling her brother in
elementary school. Their home was in Irving, so it would put them in rush hour traffic on the
way home, but that was a small price to pay to make this work. So far so good. One down, one to
go.
Laura called the clerk one more time and was delighted to get the information she needed
for the younger brother and sister as well. This time Laura lavished gratitude on the woman for
focusing on their need and getting the task done.
Alice and Rufus Williamson had one three-year-old son of their own named Manuel,
Manny for short and lived in Duncanville. Rufus was an independent electrician and worked off
a website and out of his truck. Alice was a preschool teacher and took Manny to work with her
each day. Evena’s sibs would also attend the preschool with the woman as the children had not
begun school yet, either. Laura liked that. Then she realized she did not even know the names of
Evena’s brothers and sister or their ages for that matter. She resisted the temptation to quiz
Evena not knowing how the girl would take to her probing. She would find out during their
visits.
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They would see the younger siblings at one o’clock. They could eat a quick, early lunch
now then head to Duncanville for the one o’clock visit, and then on to Irving. The visits would
be quick, but Laura had kept her word and hoped Evena’s mind would be put at ease by seeing
her family. Laura knew that one day there would be visits with Mom as well, but that was for
another day. She had all she could handle on her plate right now.
Laura let Evena help make lunch sandwiches. The girl put way more mayonnaise on the
sandwiches than Laura liked, but she would sooner bite her tongue off than complain or even
mention it. Evena opted for chips instead of the fruit Laura chose, but they shared cookies
together. There was no real conversation, but at least they had shared the table together and
Evena had eaten.
The drive to Duncanville was uneventful. Laura could sense Evena’s agitation and
apprehension, but Laura hummed or gently sang along with the praise music on the radio to try
to mellow the atmosphere. Once they arrived in the Duncanville neighborhood, it took them a
minute to find the correct house on the block, but then they pulled up in front of the small but
immaculately cared for house. Evena bounded from the car almost before Laura could put it into
park, but they arrived at the front door almost together. Before they could ring the bell, Alice
opened the door and two darling little ruffians bounded from the house engulfing Evena in bear
hugs.
“Vena, Vena,” they cried simultaneously. “We miss you. Can we please go home now?”
Laura wanted to cry. Children just do not understand when the authorities come in and
disrupt their home life, no matter how bad it had been. They cannot see that it was for their own
good and a necessity. In foster parent training, Laura remembered one worker whose job it was
to pull children from their homes stating that she had to be sure that the disruptive act she was
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inflicting upon these helpless youngsters by forcibly taking them away from the only home they
knew was actually less damaging than the dysfunctional environment they had been experiencing
at home. Yes, their living conditions warranted intervention, but the act of removal was also
traumatic enough to them that they would never forget it.
Both of the foster moms realized that the three children needed time alone together, so
they let them run out the back door and head for the swing set. Alice and Laura sat down to share
a glass of iced tea and chat. Manny was taking a nap.
Laura listened as Alice described their first night. “The twins were obviously upset when
they arrived yesterday really missing Evena and worried about where their mom and brother
were.” Laura was surprised to find out that Evena’s sister and brother were actually twins named
Victor and Victoria, Vic and Tory for short. They were five but had missed the cutoff for starting
kindergarten the current year.
“My son Manny goes to work with me since I teach in a pre-school each morning, so Vic
and Tory will accompany us as well. I hope that will lessen the trauma for the twins of adding
another new circumstance and situation to their adjustment by putting them in some other day
care.”
So they would attend preschool with Manny at Alice’s workplace. Laura liked that. As
they chatted, the women kept a close eye on the backyard and could see the close bond among
the children. Clearly the twins respected Evena as a mother figure, so Laura understood more of
Evena’s pain. Keeping regular sibling visits would need to be a high priority. All too soon, Laura
reminded the children who had moved to the shade of a large tree in the Williamson back yard to
eat popsicles that it was time that she and Evena head to Irving to see their brother. The twins
seemed more reluctant to let go of Evena than to find out more about their brother. Tears
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followed and hanging onto Evena’s legs, and you could see the teen’s obvious vacillation
between not wanting to leave the little ones and wanting to get to her brother, too.
Together the women explained what they had agreed upon during their chat, “We want
you children to stay in touch with each other on a regular basis, so we will plan another visit in
the very near future. How about if we all meet at a park at White Rock Lake and have a picnic?”
The promise helped to break the twins’ death grip on Evena, so that they could leave.
During the twenty-five minute drive from Duncanville to Irving, Laura cautiously
ventured to question Evena what she thought about the Williamsons.
“They are okay, I guess. Tory said she cried herself to sleep last night and that Vic wet
the bed.”
“I guess they were pretty upset at being moved in with strangers and having to leave
home with you.”
“Duh!” was her only reply. Laura noticed Evena did not correct her that the twins had
really had to leave the home with their Mom, not her.
Their arrival at the Marshes was met with Reggy walking out the door. He said he was
sorry to run off and not get a proper introduction to the two of them, but he had been called in for
the late shift at the hospital that night, so he would miss putting the boys to bed and had to depart
to make his shift.
He told them, “I’ll be around tomorrow afternoon and evening though, so we have
planned a no mercy game of HORSE basketball with all of us guys to see who can complete the
letters first. My boys love it, so I hope Ian will as well.” Then he left.
So, Ian was the brother’s name. He turned out to be 9 years old, right between Beau and
Karl, and they were all in different grades at school. That was a good thing, so competition
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would be minimized. Ian was not as demonstrative at seeing his big sister as the twins had been,
but there was most definitely a glint in his eye that said he was glad to see a familiar face. After
all, he was a boy and stereotypically was more reluctant to show emotion towards his sister, but
the women could read through his aloofness and see his relief at seeing her. The two siblings
headed to the TV room to allegedly play video games and reconnect. Sensitively, Sylvia told her
boys to head outside to ride their bikes and leave Ian alone with his sister.
They squawked as they left the room with their mom reminding them, “You two
remember to stay on the sidewalk and only ride around our own block.”
Sylvia shared with Laura, “I thought it was so sweet that my boys joined Ian in his new
room last night after he arrived to help him unpack. Then they invited him into their room where
they shared some of their best toys and games. Ian seems to like Karl a bit better, maybe because
Beau is the alpha male of the trio and not willing to lose his position. There was not a real battle,
just a little bit of boy stuff in establishing the pecking order.”
Plus Sylvia did mention that the now five of them had shared a family time before going
to bed during which Reggie read a child geared daily devotion that they all discussed afterwards.
Then each one prayed a short prayer of whatever was on his or her heart. It was not organized or
round robin, so it was not awkward that Ian did not participate in the prayer, but he did hear the
rest of them pray for him anyway. Laura was thrilled to hear of the godly influence from this
home.
Sylvia also shared, “After the boys went to bed last night, I went to check on them as I
always do, before I headed to the TV room myself for some mindless comedy to wait until time
for bed. At commercial time, I slipped down the hall to Ian’s bedroom door and did hear him
softly crying. I could only imagine how this was very hard on him but didn’t want to embarrass
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him by letting him know I heard his tears.” Her compassion for the boy touched Laura’s heart.
He was in a good place.
Then today, Sylvia had taken her boys to school and subsequently stopped by the
elementary school office to enroll Ian. After the detailed process, she and Ian were just in time to
meet Beau for lunch. They had missed Karl’s lunch period.
Like a good big brother, Beau shared, “Hey, Ian, that teacher you got is the one I had last
year. She is young and very pretty!” He also told Ian, “She sometimes teaches really cool science
lessons that can be fun as long as the class doesn’t get too rowdy. So watch out that you don’t get
messing around and spoil it for everyone. Tomorrow morning I will go with you and introduce
you to your new, hot teacher before I go on to my own class.” So much for needing Sylvia to
help him adjust!
To Laura Sylvia added, “We are going to offer for Ian to join a city soccer team, if he
wants to. I’ll let you know the schedule if he signs up, so Evena can come see some of his
games.”
Laura was very pleased with the Marshes, too and grateful that Ian seemed to be getting
off to a good start. Oh, the resilience of childhood!
Shortly thereafter, Evena walked into the kitchen with her arm around Ian’s shoulders
more a motherly posture than sisterly, where the two women were talking. She hugged Ian goodbye with him only partly consenting to the girly show of affection, but as they headed for the
door, Laura did notice moisture in his eyes. She indicated that the Marshes and she had also
discussed the picnic and fun day at White Rock Lake for very soon where all four of the siblings
could enjoy a day together playing and having a picnic lunch. He cheered up with that news.
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In the car on the way home this time Laura left it up to Evena to break the silence and
share how she thought the visits had gone.
“Beau and Karl have some cool video games. Ian’s going to love that. He said Sylvia is a
good cook. And he hopes his new teacher is really as neat as Beau promised.”
Reading between the lines, it sounded to Laura as if Evena felt pretty comfortable that her
sister and brothers were okay. That was a huge relief to them both. Laura thanked God that He
had worked out all the craziness of the day so that Evena had been able to check up on the family
siblings she felt so responsible for. Maybe she would rest easier tonight and be able to begin
thinking of her own adjustment now.
Laura decided to give it one more day before enrolling Evena in the area high school. She
knew the office staff and several of the teachers from their time there with Tina and Howard, and
they knew her. That would help, but she told Evena that today would be a girls’ day. She took
Evena to the mall to get her a couple of school outfits. The only rule was that they both had to
like everything they got. If Laura chose something that was too nerdy for Evena, all Evena had to
do was scowl or give it a thumbs down and it went back on the rack. If Evena chose something
Laura felt was too risqué or otherwise inappropriate, then she would scowl or give a thumbs
down. No argument. It worked. Both seemed pleased with their purchases. They stopped at a
sandwich shop for lunch and actually talked a little about the new clothes, school, and teachers.
Evena’s family never came up, and Laura took that as a good sign. She was sure they were still
heavily on her mind, but Evena was allowing herself to have a life of her own now as well.
As they walked to the car, Laura asked, “Would you like to go get pedicures? A girl
doesn’t want to start a new school with naked toes!” The smile on her face answered for Evena,
and Laura headed the car for the salon.
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The following morning Evena was enrolled in school wearing one of her new outfits and
was encouraged to go ahead and stay for the day, only having missed first and second periods.
The principal assigned Evena another freshman from the student council who had a similar class
schedule to walk Evena to each of her new classes. Laura was very grateful for the
thoughtfulness. She drove home and prayed that Evena would connect to her new world.
That same bus corner was the drop off for Evena after school. She came in the door
complaining about all the homework the new teachers had given her, but that seemed to Laura
like more a typical teen attitude than a real problem. Evena did have a question about one
assignment and needed to call the host girl from school to clarify the work. She was connecting
already. Laura was pleased that the girls had already exchanged phone numbers. Praise God!
Understandably, due to the chaos from previous family life, Evena was behind in several subject
areas, but between her new friend’s help, Laura and Monty’s assistance and teacher tutoring,
they were confident that she would catch up.
That evening, Evena called Ian and the twins to see how the day had gone for them.
While she indicated tears had come from the twins upon hanging up, and Ian had also
demonstrated reluctance to end the call, it did seem to help to have the contact. Laura had no
problem with this becoming a daily occurrence. It did so for a while, then appropriately dwindled
down to only once or twice a week.
As the foster families had promised, a family picnic was planned the third weekend at
White Rock Lake Park. Each family brought sandwiches for their own families but had agreed to
bring cookies to share with one another. As soon as the three cars arrived, the four children
leaped from their cars and raced for the swings. Evena took turns pushing the twins, but then
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took a turn swinging herself. After that the four moved on to the merry-go-round and eventually
the jungle gym.
Predictably, Ian was the one to play King of the Hill and attempted standing upon the
very top of the jungle gym proclaiming his domination of the whole world. Just before Alice
could reprimand him to come down, Evena stepped in, “Ian, what in the world do you think you
are doing? You could fall and really hurt yourself. Don’t you think, boy? Get down from there
right now.”
He probably took the scolding better from Evena than he would have from Alice or
Reggy. Evena really had been a good mother figure for the younger ones, but that was too much
responsibility for a young girl. They all hoped they could relieve her of this.
The four kids really enjoyed their free play. Then they began more organized activities
using toys such as Frisbees and various balls to make up games all could participate in. It was
good for the adults to get to know one another also during the event and share insights as well.
Things were really going pretty well. Crying and bedwetting persisted at the Williamson house.
The Marshes reported resistance with homework, Ian’s being academically behind and
grumbling about household chores, but nothing seemed out of perspective. Monty and Laura
shared that somehow they wanted Evena to relax from feeling so responsible for her family. She
needed to be a teenager and leave the adult responsibilities to the adults. They hoped this would
come eventually.
Evena had also been adamant about wanting to see their mother. Phone calls to the
agency informed them that Perla, their mother, had been in detox for the weeks since arriving
and had not been allowed visitors during that time. She was out of that stage now and ready to
begin visitation, but the staff strongly suggested that she only see the children individually. The
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whole crew could prove to be too overwhelming and problematic for her. Evena was chosen to
see her mother the first week. Ian would go the following week. The twins could go together the
third week. Depending on how those visits went, the fourth week could possibly be all the
siblings together. Time would tell.
While they waited for the first parent meeting, Laura learned more about drugs and
treatment centers than she had ever known before, even after dealing with Tina’s issues. The two
largest cities in Texas, Houston and Dallas, had become major suppliers of the nation’s legal
prescription narcotics, with Houston being the third largest in the nation. Consequently both
cities were replete with individuals who were subverting the popular and addictive drugs into
street supply. That put the drug lords right in their back yard! Overdosing on these dangerous
drugs had become the top cause of accidental death in the U. S. Laura realized that Perla was
dabbling with more than just the loss of her children with her habits. Her very life was on the
line. Laura hoped Perla would come to realize this.
Laura also learned much about rehab facilities, and the variation was staggering. Some
were little more than converted apartment complexes with poor if any security and some staff not
much more than caring volunteers. Much of the success of these programs was left to voluntary
compliance of the patients. Understandably, their success rate was low. At least Perla was in a
good facility with licensed staff and a full spectrum of treatment procedures all enclosed in one
facility with tight security. There were experienced doctors and nurses familiar with both
substance abuse and mental health disabilities. The patients were given cardio-vascular exercise
for both physical and psychological stimulation, occupational therapy, group and individual
counseling, and even nutrition education. The first step was always detox, which could last from
a few days to several weeks or longer. Apparently, this had not gone smoothly or quickly for the
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children’s mother, but that stage was finally completed, so they were about to embark on the
very important step of beginning parental visitation.
The agency and rehab staff agreed that it would be best to start visiting Perla with her
oldest child. Evena was delighted and anticipated the day with obvious excitement. The case
worker suggested that she drive Evena to the Carrollton facility for the one-hour visit with Perla
to allow for some transition time for the girl. Evena had to be cleared by the facility’s security
and questioned about any contraband she might be carrying in to her mother. Then the case
worker stayed in the waiting room to let Evena visit with her mother alone. When Evena saw her
mother, she was sitting in the TV room watching some sort of movie with several other patients.
Evena was somehow almost afraid to speak to her mother, and Perla showed some hesitance,
almost embarrassment perhaps, at seeing her daughter, too, but soon they embraced and were
told that they could move to the currently unused dining room for a more private visit. Staff was
always close at hand, but at least Mother and daughter were secluded from other patients. Almost
simultaneously, the two began to question each other on how they were doing.
“Mom, how are you doing? Are you doing okay in here? What is the program like? Are
they mean to you?”
“No, no, no, Sweetheart, they are trying to help me. Really everyone is pretty nice as long
as we follow all their rules. Most of the other patients are nice enough, although a couple of them
are pretty obnoxious. The food is not bad and I like my roommate. Mostly we just talk which
isn’t accomplishing very much, but I think I will be out of here before very long. Enough about
me. How are you doing? What is the family like where you are? And how are the other kids? I
miss you all so much.”
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“Oh, we’re all good, Mom. I’ve met the Marshes and Williamsons where the kids are
staying and they seem pretty nice. The kids seem to be doing alright. And I like Monty and
Laura. I didn’t at first, but they are coming around. Laura lets me do my own thing pretty much
and is helping me get back on track in school. They have a great house, and I am finding some
friends at school and church.”
“Church? Do they make you go to church? They don’t have a right to interfere like that!”
“Mom, it’s okay. They don’t really force me to go. Actually, it is pretty neat. I don’t
really mind. I like the music. I kind of tune out the garble of the man up front, but the kids in the
youth group I attend are pretty cool as long as they don’t get preachy at me. They don’t do that
very often. I just tell them to back off and they do. I’m really doing okay.”
They spent the rest of their time critiquing the staff members and each activity Perla
participated in. Mostly she indicated that the activities were foolish and a waste of time, but not
too bad. She kept assuring Evena that she was doing great and would be out of there in no time.
Evena was very relieved to get such good news.
Laura did not know what to expect from Evena when she returned home. After the case
worker dropped her off, Evena was, in fact, overly quiet and isolated for the evening. Laura was
sure the girl was confused about where her loyalties lay and was also very hopeful for her mom’s
progress but leery nonetheless. So, they gave her space. After the evening of quiet, life pretty
much resumed as earlier.
The following week Ian visited, but he came home angry. He was angry with the
Marshes. He was angry at the teacher and students at school. And he was angry at Evena when
she called. He just didn’t like being removed from everything that had been familiar to him, and
seeing his mother had reminded and reinforced all the changes imposed upon him. Evena tried to
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talk some sense into her brother that Mom was really doing well and that they’d all be going
back with her very soon. Laura was not sure if promising that hope to Ian was good or not, but at
least it seemed to settle things down a bit with him for the time being.
The twins’ visit was dramatic and traumatic from the start. They cried and clung to their
mother the whole time and acted fearful of all staff personnel who approached them. They hardly
left their mom’s side and put a great strain on Perla that had staff concerned. The kids’ hysterical
crying and having to be forcibly removed when the visit was over made everyone wonder if the
visit had been profitable at all to anyone or worth the pain it caused. The Williamsons indicated
that the crying and bedwetting increased once again at home after the twins’ visit. Alice even had
a great deal of difficulty with Vic and Tory at preschool which stretched her nerves significantly.
When she brought them home the drama continued even toward Manny. Finally the high energy
level lessened and wore off, but it made the Williamsons dread the next visit with their mother.
It was decided by the rehab staff that it was too early for Perla to handle a visit with all of
her children, so to her dismay but the foster families’ relief, the fourth group visit was cancelled.
The families replaced it with another foster family outing to White Rock Lake which was a
tremendous help for all of the adults. The families again planned fun activities that all ages could
enjoy from empty soda bottle lawn bowling to paper airplane races and a squirt gun war. That
time they cooked out hamburgers and s’mores for dessert. The children improved significantly
after that outing. Connecting with one another continued to work wonders. Sharing battle stories
among the adults seemed to lessen their loads as well.
Subsequent visits to see their mom at the rehab center continued to be problematic. The
kids still were apprehensive before leaving and sad to angry upon returning home, so the level of
disruption was consistent. Their mother had finally had visitation with all four of her children
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together, and while it was intense and did challenge her, she had handled it well enough to
continue these collective visits. Handling it for the children, not so much. Case workers assured
all of the foster parents that this was to be expected from children of all ages. It just went with
the territory.
Perla was participating in the individual and group therapy sessions and had quickly
come to acknowledge the error of her behavior. She seemed ready to turn over a new leaf and
live differently. There was talk of Mom’s being released and heading to a halfway house soon.
The children were all counting the days until the five of them would be back home together,
wherever that might be, and all could put this behind them. Their behavior significantly
improved which was a tremendous pleasure and relief to the foster families, but the adults were
not quite so optimistic with Perla’s quick turnaround. The progress seemed so rapid and drastic
that it seemed too good to be true. The families hoped that it was not a false hope.
Then came the news that Perla’s sister had come to visit the rehab center. The sisters had
enjoyed a good visit, but after her departure, a periodic room check revealed a bottle of
oxycodone in Perla’s night stand that her sister had slipped in to her. When confronted with its
presence, Perla became very belligerent at the violation of her rights to privacy, of which she had
none in such an environment. She physically lashed out at the orderlies and was put on
restriction from all privileges, even visits with her children. It was back to square one for her.
The siblings all took this very hard. They had been so hopeful, but they dared not blame
their mom. That was not a safe thing for them to do. So, they blamed the agency and the foster
families. Grades dropped; anger increased; disrespectful talk prevailed; problematic behaviors
surged. All three families were sorely taxed by this change of events.
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The Williamsons were at their wits end. “This is worse than when they first came. It is
upsetting Manny, and I am hysterical most of the time,” cried Alice. “I just don’t know how
much more any of us can take of this. We are considering returning the twins to the agency for
another placement for them.”
The Marshes were a bit ambivalent, “We don’t want to back away from Ian but still we
need to protect Beau and Kurt from the disruptive home life that is going on. It is a very hard
dilemma to choose between our two boys and Ian. We just don’t know what to do.”
Monty and Laura suggested another picnic at which time the adults could put their heads
together. After a lot of venting, all determined to give it another try trusting time would again
bring down the chaos. The outing seemed to settle the children down again also. That on again,
off again with their mother was very hard on everyone. The foster families hoped they would not
have to endure that setback another time. Patience and dedication were running thin.
The rehab staff decided that Perla had just been playing them. She was giving them the
answers they wanted to hear but had not done any real heart work. They put her on indefinite
restriction from any visitors, even her children until they decided it was in her best interest to see
them again. The children were very disappointed, but since they were already very disruptive,
their behavior did not seem to escalate any further. Actually as time without visits progressed, all
of the siblings became easier to manage. Life at all three homes mellowed once again to
manageable.
Progress hereafter for Perla was very slow and painstaking. Like most addicts, her denial
of a problem and eagerness to transfer blame for everything somewhere else, kept her from
moving forward very consistently, but once she was permitted to see her children again, she
continued again telling her children at their visits that she was really doing well and would be out
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of there in no time. The families were losing their resolve to consider Return Home as the
probable goal. They doubted Perla would ever genuinely come around.
Evena became withdrawn and her grades started slipping. Monty and Laura had been
there before. Watching for signs of poor friendships, drug use or sneaking out at night, Laura and
Monty wanted to address the issue head on this time and not get blindsided. An idea came to the
couple that they hoped might help. They had to get special consent from the Agency to take
Evena out of state, but after the usual red tape, permission was granted.
They planned a family weekend outing up into Oklahoma and took Evena to the
Arbuckle Wilderness Park, a drive through zoo at which the animals were free to roam and could
actually come right up to your car. It was not all they had heard it once used to be, but they did
buy cups of food for the animals and laughed as the animals clearly knew the routine and eagerly
approached their car windows looking for hand-outs. The family had been warned about the
ostriches, that they would actually get their heads inside your car window and then be most
difficult to ask to leave, so they approached them with caution and only cracked their windows a
tiny bit, just enough to put the food out for the monstrous birds. They found reason to laugh at
them anyway as they tried nevertheless to barge inside.
Then they traveled over to The Garold Wayne Interactive Zoological Park. That park was
mostly dedicated to large rescue cats: lions, tigers, ligers, leopards, cheetahs, and the like whom
thoughtless people had adopted when the cats were such cute little kits, but then discarded once
they grew into the dangerous predators God had made them to be. There were also bears, a
hyena, dingoes, monkeys and various other wild animals, too. They discussed how sad it was
that non-thinking people would purchase exotic pets as babies, then realize as they grew up that
they had dangerous wild animals in their homes. That had caused the influx of those animals
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being turned over to rescue facilities. Because those animals had been so acclimated to human
contact though, they would not ever be able to be returned to the wild. Those captives did not
know how to hunt for food for themselves and had not adequately developed the normally inbred
skills of protecting themselves from inherent danger, nor could they pass those needed attributes
on to their offspring. They were well taken care of in the rescue facilities but doomed to a life
outside of what they were created to enjoy. Regardless of their situation, they were a thrill to
visitors who got to see the majestic animals up close. Each animal was named and had its own
story. The tour guide shared each one’s history which personalized each animal to them.
The thrilling treat here was the opportunity to actually play with a baby tiger! Evena was
ecstatic. Just like with Howard, animals can often get through to people when human interactions
cannot. After a guided tour of the facility, a three-month old baby tiger that had been removed
from its mother at birth and hand raised by humans was allowed to roam over their laps as they
sat on the ground to play with it. The attendants let the people stroke its soft fur as it climbed all
over them. Yes, it would, of course, grow into a dangerous predator, but being gently raised with
kind training against using its teeth and claws aggressively made it a safe endeavor while it was
still a baby. They had been required to sign release of liability forms, but they notified the
agency of this as well, and all considered the small risk worth the experience. Seeing Evena’s
eyes and hearing her giggles confirmed their hopes. They took copious pictures and planned to
frame the best for her room.
The following day they headed up to Oklahoma City to tour the Oklahoma City National
Memorial. The Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building had been the target of the Oklahoma City
bombing on April 19, 1995, which killed 168 people, including 19 children all under age 6 from
the on-site company day care center. The group learned that half of the building collapsed
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seconds after the truck bomb detonated. What was left of the building was imploded by the
authorities a month after the attack due to its unstable condition and danger to the populace, and
the Oklahoma City National Memorial had been built on the site. As fun as the previous day had
been, this day was somber and introspective. It did, however, open up healing conversations
between the foster parents and foster child.
Evena shared, “That was so wrong and sad. What could ever make someone want to kill
little children like that? It makes me realize as bad as my family’s life is right now, it could be
much worse. At least Mom and my siblings are alive, and we have hope of one day being back
together again.” She sat introspectively quiet for some time then added, “Actually the family I
live with now is pretty great.”
Evena had never been quite as interested in the church youth group as they had hoped.
Her mind always seemed too preoccupied with issues of her biological family to allow much
space for matters of the soul and spirit. She would attend church with them but had only attended
youth group sporadically after something between encouragement and insistence from her foster
parents. She had developed some casual acquaintances there with the other youth in attendance,
but she seemed intent upon keeping them at arm’s length. Their faith was still not something she
embraced or wanted any part of.
Then there was the special daylong church event for the teens of their church at the
Hawaiian Falls Waterpark in The Colony. Slathered with sun screen and anticipation, Evena
eagerly joined the other youth on the church bus for a fun day in the sun and water. She
connected with the casual friends she had made at church and with some of the other high school
students for this event. As usual, there were some of the kids who were more adventurous than
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perhaps they should have been. Every group has them. While these youth were not the ones
Evena usually hung out with, they were definitely in attendance for this trip and made their
presence dramatically known.
For hours the kids swam, climbed the high tower structures to roar down crazy slides into
crystal clear pools of water, rode the lazy river inner tubes, ate, played in the wave pool and
sunbathed. It was heavenly. Evena was actually drawing closer to some of the youth and really
becoming friends with them. No one seemed to tire of the various activities available at the fun
facility.
Towards afternoon when more and more families arrived, the lines lengthened and the
waiting became more tedious. It dampened some of the enjoyment, but the thrill of the rides still
made it worth the wait for most of the teens. The ones that were a part of the rambunctious group
did not want to wait with the others and began to spread their wings. When the attendants
weren’t looking, they had cut in line, angering the other patrons who were responsibly waiting
their turns, then when they were still bored with waiting even their abbreviated turns, they
challenged the other ‘fraidy cats to jump over the railing and down into the water below with
them and scrap the long lines. While most of the kids told them they were crazy and ignored
their ridiculous idea, a few actually listened to the nonsense and began to embrace the wild plan.
Unfortunately, Evena was one of them. As the boisterous ones continued their taunting, Evena
began to contemplate the adventure not considering any possible consequences to such
foolishness. So, in a moment of madness, she and three other reckless youth climbed up the bars
of the railing protecting the crowd from the open space around them and plunged off the side rail
down into the pool below. Attendants saw what they were about to do, blew whistles and rushed
toward the crazed kids, but they were not in time. With shrieks of delight, the four leaped into
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the air as if they could fly and sailed down to the water below. The water in that area was not
intended for such shenanigans and was rather shallow, so three of the kids landed with enough
impact to jam their legs and hips in the low water but avoided real injury. They jumped up
ecstatic at the thrill and success of the daring challenge until they noticed that one of the jumpers
had failed to calculate correctly and had slammed into the side edging of the pool below. That
jumper was Evena!
Lifeguards and park attendants were on the scene immediately. Emergency personnel
were called, and their youth group leaders were quickly summoned. Fortunately, Evena’s head
and upper body had hit the water, but her left leg did not fare so well. She had a nasty blow to
her lower leg which was bleeding heavily. Scolding of the other culprits would come later as the
focus was totally on Evena. As the paramedics arrived, checked her vital signs and appraised her
injuries, the youth leaders also arrived. Reports of the event were taken by park officials, the
profuse bleeding was controlled by the attendants and then the paramedics loaded Evena into an
ambulance. The youth pastor rode with her to Trinity Medical Center. Once Evena was sedated
in the ambulance, Pastor Mark placed the call to her foster family.
It was the weekend, so Monty was home and happened to take the call. Horrified, he
shared the terrible incident with Laura and then gathered her up and headed to their car. Laura
called the agency as they sped once again to the hospital emergency room fearful of the fate of
another foster child. Memories of the ill-fated destiny with Tina were too fresh and reminiscent,
but they prayed as they drove that God would intervene.
They parked quickly in the emergency lot and hurried into the waiting area. Their
panicky inquiry directed them to a nurse who ushered them into a triage space where an
orthopedic specialist had already been called in to evaluate Evena’s condition. Amazingly, other
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than a few scrapes around her leg, the only serious injury was the point of impact on her leg, but
the news there was not good. Paramedics had been able to stop the blood flow without an undue
amount being lost, but that had revealed an open fracture to the tibia and fibula. Both sharp
bones had penetrated the skin and soft tissues in her leg causing damage to muscles, tendons,
nerves, blood vessels and ligaments along with the obvious damage to the bones. Fortunately
there was no knee or ankle involvement, but immediate surgery was a must. Because it was a
compound fracture, there was a higher risk for complications and they were looking at a long
recovery time. Infections of both the wound and the bone were serious concerns and complete,
functional use of her leg in the future was not guaranteed. It was good that the edge of the pool,
while certainly not sterile, had not seemed to expose her wound to terrible contamination such as
would be from a truly septic environment, but infection, nonetheless, would be a major concern.
Then again, how many other scraped knees on the edge of the pool had left unknown bacteria
lurking? The attending doctor came with stellar credentials and informed them that knowing the
environment where the injury occurred would give him insight regarding what types of
contaminants the fracture may have been exposed to. Her damage was extensive and had created
a high level of concern for infection. While the exact extent of the injury was yet to be
determined, the doctor warned them that bone infection can be difficult to eliminate requiring
long-term antibiotic treatment and possibly several surgeries, sometimes requiring amputation as
the only way to thwart the infection. Only time would tell. Strong antibiotics and a tetanus
booster had already being administered intravenously. Evena was otherwise a healthy young
person which improved her prognosis. She was still sedated due to the intense pain, but the
couple prayed and worried what the days ahead of them would hold.
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Evena was soon wheeled to x-ray on her gurney where scans confirmed complete
breakage through the two large bones but no significant fragments lurking around to cause more
concern. She was being prepped for surgery, so further reports were forthcoming.
Wait, that horrible four-letter word intruded into their lives again. While they waited for
updates on the surgery not having any idea how long that would be, they called the agency and
church friends to update them on Evena’s status, what little they knew of it anyway. Their Bible
study group assured them that they would pray and asked if there was any other way they could
help. Pastor Mark was still on hand to offer support and prayer as well. The agency would take
care of alerting Perla and the sibling families. She would downplay the seriousness of the injury.
“Thank you, Pastor, so much for all you have done for Evena today. We really appreciate
your standing by us as well and your prayers, but you have a family and need to get home to
them. We will let you know if there is any significant change in Evena’s condition and the
outcome of her surgery.”
“I am more than happy to be here. I am so very sorry this happened, but we will uphold
all of you with the Lord and count on Him to do a great work in her life through this. As soon as
she is ready to have visitors, I promise to return to see her.”
“Thanks again for your immediate and reassuring support.” Then he left.
After an insurmountable time of waiting, the surgeon finally reappeared. He informed
them that he had thoroughly cleansed the wound and bone of all dirt, foreign bodies from the
pool edge and unhealthy, damaged skin, muscle and other soft tissue. It had been flushed with an
ample amount of disinfection solution. Some small splintering pieces of bone had been removed.
Time would tell if there had been significant bone loss to indicate that additional bone graft
surgeries would be needed. The soft tissue damage was sufficient enough though that internal
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fixation or stabilization of the bone was not yet possible. Therefore, external fixation pins and
plates had been installed outside of her leg to align the bones above and below the site of the
fractures. These would later be removed and internal, permanent stabilizers would then be able to
be surgically inserted. Until that time she would be bedridden and in traction with serious
restriction of movement of the injured leg. There would be a three-fold treatment plan: 1) prevent
infection, 2) get the broken bones to heal, and 3) restore functional use. Evena was in recovery
and would be sent to the intensive care unit shortly to monitor her vitals, at least through the
night.
Since Evena was settled and sleeping currently, Monty and Laura headed downstairs to
the hospital cafeteria to get something to eat before it closed. Exiting the elevator on the first
floor, they bumped into a couple from church just arriving who had come to be at their side.
They accompanied them to dinner and allowed the couple to talk and share their fears for
themselves and Evena. Their subsequent prayers were immensely comforting to the duo. It was
decided that Monty would go home and pack a small overnight case of essentials that would
allow Laura to stay at the hospital for whatever time was needed. Tonight she would spend the
night in the intensive care family visitation solarium and monitor Evena. Monty would return the
following morning with her needs.
They thanked their friends for their timely visit and ushered them out of the hospital door.
Before Monty left, they headed upstairs and were allowed to see Evena in the ICU as she was
then out of recovery and semi-conscious. She was very groggy and probably would not even
remember their visit, but they were glad to see her awake. Her leg looked horrible, but she did
not appear to be in too much pain. Ah, the wonders of modern medicine! A tiny bit of relief
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came to them now. The time clock on the healing process was beginning. They prayed for
smooth sailing and God’s mercy on the precious young girl’s life.
It was a troubled night for Monty at home in the empty bed as he attempted to sleep.
Likewise, Laura rose every time anyone came or left the ICU waiting room, but pushing the
chairs together with a hospital pillow and blanket had actually been more comfortable than she
had feared they would be. Morning came and she was so grateful for toiletries Monty had
brought that helped rid her body of sleepiness and brighten her attention to the new day. Monty
had arrived also with Danish and coffee so that they did not need to leave the area for breakfast.
They were allowed to visit Evena who reportedly had had a good night. All vital signs remained
stable. She would be moved to a private room that morning. Good news. Thank You, God.
Calls from well-wishers began to flood their phones. Pastor Mark was allowed to come
visit Evena later that day, but others from the youth group were instructed to wait a few more
days. When the youth pastor arrived, Laura ran downstairs to grab some food since Evena was
being attended to. After his visit with Evena, Laura walked him to the hospital elevator. He
conveyed to Laura that he had shared the gospel with Evena once again and had assured the girl
that God loved her and was watching over her even at this time.
He shared, “Evena listened more than she usually did. I think that is a positive sign.
Maybe God is using this to get her attention. I promise to visit again soon.”
The case worker came by and was relieved to see that Evena had come through surgery
well and was on the road to recovery, at least they hoped so. Her mother and siblings had been
told that Evena had broken her leg on a church outing and would be unable to have visits for a
while. They did not want to lie, but telling everyone the extent of her injury seemed unnecessary
at this point. The other foster families reported that the children took the news pretty much in
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stride and promised to draw pictures for their sister. Evena’s mother was furious and was
blaming any and everyone for negligence. Authorities at her facility were helping her cope.
Evena slept through much of that first day, but the doctor provided her with a Tens unit that
evening for the pain from Evena’s leg. It provided a great deal of relief and comfort so that she
was able to reduce her pain meds and be more coherent. During the second post-operative day,
Monty returned to work, so Evena and Laura were alone to play endless card and board games
whenever Evena was awake and coherent enough to do so. Medical personnel came by regularly
checking her vitals and her leg conscientiously. Laura began to feel confident that the worry and
trauma were past. The healing journey was successfully progressing.
In the following days friends from school and church began to come by. While their visits
really tired her out, they helped Evena’s morale so much to be cared for by them. Flowers and
cards began to appear. Cute pictures from her siblings arrived by mail. Everything was looking
up.
Laura commented to one of the nurses, “These visits are so good for Evena and helping
her morale so much, but they must really be stimulating her, because she has started noticeably
breathing faster.”
The nurse then checked Evena’s pulse and took her temperature. She exited the room
speedily which puzzled Laura, then returned with a lab technician who drew more blood. The
doctor came by soon thereafter notifying them that increased respiration, heart rate, temperature
and change in white blood count indicated that Evena was beginning to experience septic shock.
That can sometime be a result of severe infection and can occur immediately after an injury or
after some time had elapsed. That condition could even lead to multiple organ dysfunction or
failure and even death. Evena was being returned to the ICU.
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Shock and dismay flooded Laura. She phoned Monty, the case worker and the church
once more, then went down to the chapel to pray and cry. She didn’t know how much more of
this she could handle. She was tired. She was afraid. Memories of Tina came back in vivid
clarity traumatizing her further. She felt terribly sorry for herself and all the pain she was
experiencing. Then as she prayed she realized she had to hold herself together for Evena, who
was the real victim here, not her. Laura recognized that her focus was all wrong and terribly
selfish. It was her job to support and help Evena. That was a mother’s role, so Laura headed back
to the ICU waiting room and pulled her chairs together again to make her bed for the night. They
had taken several steps backward that she had not foreseen in the healing process, but she would
be there for the girl.
The next day any visitors who came by were only able to see Laura. The foster family,
the case worker and pastor were the only ones allowed the periodic visits in to see the patient in
the ICU, but by the end of that day, reports were that heart rate, temperature, pulse and white
blood count were returning to normal and she could, hopefully, return to a regular room the
following day.
With tremendous relief, Laura slept more comfortably in her chairs that night. After
Evena was returned to a private room, they pulled out all the game supplies once more and
resumed the healing and endless waiting that was a part of the hospital routine. Visitors remained
faithful to come by cheering the patient up. Several of the youth had coordinated together and
developed a fun plan to bring various little gifts with time stamps on them that had to be opened
on various days at indicated times. It was an enjoyable way to pass the time with periodic alarms
that it was now time to open gift number five from Alfonso and find a pair of plastic lips, then a
squeeze rubber nose, Count Dracula fangs, a game of Old Maid, or some other comical present.
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The weeks went by slowly. The games became monotonous but were, on the other hand, a
godsend of something to help pass the endless time. They appreciated each visitor so much more
than they could ever convey.
Eventually, the orthopedic surgeon arrived with good news that her leg had healed
enough that it was time for the second surgery to remove the external fixation devices and
replace them with internal pins which would remain permanently. The wound itself was healing
nicely and lost tissue seemed to be regenerating sufficiently. No skin or bone grafts would be
necessary. A rod was to be inserted into the long bones for stabilization and internal, permanent
pins would be inserted above and below the breaks during the procedure once more for
permanence. Since the wound would be re-opened and re-stitched, infection was once again a
major concern and would need careful monitoring. The Tens unit would be called upon again to
monitor more post-operative pain. Prayer was lifted up that there would be no more septic shock.
Pastor Mark had continued to come by every few days. Then the day before surgery
number two to alter the fixation devices, he shared with Monty and Laura that Evena had just
surrendered her heart and life to Jesus Christ. While she had struggled with God for allowing her
to fall and be hurt so badly, she had come to see that the fall had not been God’s fault at all. He
never encouraged her up on that rail or suggested she attempt to fly! That had been all up to her,
but she also realized that He was working this whole trauma for her good. She had seen how
faithfully Pastor Mark and the rest of the church group had stuck by her and continued
befriending her and holding her up in prayer even though many of them hardly knew her. She
had been keeping all of them at arm’s length, but they were loving her like she was their best
friend. Besides all the laughing the teens had done over the silly gifts, each one of these kids had
prayed for Evena before their visits had ended. She saw that their faith was very real and had real
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substance. How could she resist such demonstrations of love? God had not only sent His Son for
her, but He had also sent so many other sons and daughters to be Jesus with skin on for her.
Surgery number two came and went. There was another day in ICU as a precaution to
monitor her closely. She returned to her room as scheduled the following day and picked up the
card and game routine once more, adding puzzle books to the entertainment package which had
thoughtfully been supplied by church friends. Evena was still not out of the woods yet. Septic
shock could rear its ugly head again. The new surgery could abscess. But hopefully they were
making progress. Evena was finally allowed into a wheel chair with leg extension to keep her leg
elevated and the swelling down, and she felt like she had been liberated from a prison cell. It was
painful moving her leg to get it into position in the chair, but the freedom from the bed made it
all worthwhile. She cruised the hospital halls whenever she could get a chauffeur to transport her
around. Her church friends volunteered to drive for her and had to be cautioned that they were
not on a go-cart track or in a bumper car race. They had to put their teenage exuberance aside
and use necessary caution for their new friend.
Soon, physical therapy began by wheeling Evena downstairs to a PT room where very
gentle, re-strengthening training was begun on her leg, and exercises to help return mobility were
introduced.
Finally the day came when Evena was allowed to leave the hospital that had been her
home for so long and return home to Monty and Laura’s house. Summer was long since gone,
and school had begun, but it would be some time before she would be able to or allowed to
return to school. The school district had provisions for just such circumstances. There were home
bound teachers who would come by several times a week with instructions in her classes. Her
friends became couriers to bring new assignments to her and to return completed ones to school.
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After a few days at home of rest and recuperation, she was also prescribed physical
therapy three times a week. Just getting her to and from the facility was a challenge to Laura
with loading and unloading the wheel chair and the patient, so friends and the agency offered
relief. There were several prescribed daily exercises for Evena to do at home as well as at the
appointments. Laura assisted her in these procedures and was sure to keep her accountable for
consistently working.
How long this phase of the recovery would take was an uncertainty that discouraged
Evena a great deal. She thought she had come to realize how bad an injury she had sustained, but
she did not realize how stiff, weak and uncomfortable her whole leg would continue to be. Even
her good leg had gotten very weak from all the inactivity. She came face to face with the
realization that she still had months more to travel this path, and there were no guarantees how
much of her former functioning she would regain. Medical personnel had let her know how
important her attitude and perseverance were in the matter.
Visits with her siblings resumed, but initially they had needed to come to Evena until she
was mobile enough to once again take turns going to them. Her family began to realize just how
bad Evena’s broken leg had been. Visits with her mother had been delayed until Evena could be
transported to Perla’s facility. Her mother was not happy with that but came to realize just how
bad Evena’s broken leg had been. Staff personnel worked with her diligently to help her accept
the ordeal and to focus more on Evena’s needs than herself and the parties she had wanted to
blame. The waiting to see her daughter was very hard for her, but she began to see that her
patience was important for Evena’s healing. Eventually, she realized, relatively regular visitation
would resume and all five of the family members would be able to return to their previous
schedule. Time was marching on.
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When the Christmas dance was announced, Evena tried hard not to despair and create a
pity party for herself since she would be unable to participate. Her friends and school couriers
still came by regularly with assignments and cheerful visits, so she heard all about the dresses,
tuxes, corsages and some limos being planned. Several times after her friends left she found
herself crying to herself, then she would pull out the box of all the silly prizes her friends had
lavished upon her back in the hospital and smile. They were really good friends. And they
deserved the fun of the occasion.
The dance had been set for the Friday night that school was let out before the Christmas
holiday. The night of the dance Evena watched some television Christmas movies with Monty
and Laura and tried not to dwell on her absence from the festivity. Instead she hoped and prayed
that her friends were having a wonderful time. She also realized for the first time that Christmas
had so much more meaning than it ever had before with much more emphasis on the birth of her
Savior than Santa Claus, gifts, colored lights and all of the celebrations people made of the
occasion. He had given up so much more than she was giving up, so how could she whine?
Her PT had begun challenging her out of her wheel chair with more and more short
stretches of walking included. That was coming along slowly, but it felt good to her to be getting
up out of the wheel chair and motivating independently off and on. She had been faithfully
executing her exercises to achieve as much progress as possible.
The following Saturday was finally to be a visit with her mother, but no mention had
been made of it, which was unusual. When she questioned Monty about it, he evasively replied,
“This Saturday is not a good time for your mom. We decided to move it to Sunday afternoon
after church. Tomorrow will work out better for everyone.” That was strange, but she accepted
the change and thought little more of it.
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The next day Laura fixed a typical Saturday lunch, and then Evena retired to the game
room to work on her PT exercises. She heard the doorbell ring and Laura call out to Monty,
“Honey, could you please answer the door as my hands are wet and I am right in the middle of
washing up lunch dishes?”
He replied, “I am deep in a repair project and if I let go of the pieces of the doorknob I
am fixing it will all fall apart, and I’ll have to start all over, so Evena, would you please go
answer the door?”
Strange again, but the teen began the hobble across the house to the door. It took more
time than most people would expect, so the doorbell rang a second time. “Hey, keep your pants
on, would you! I’m coming as fast as I can.”
She finally reached the entryway of the house and opened the front door to find a crew of her
best friends singing Christmas carols. How fun! Then she noticed they were all wearing their
formal dresses and tuxedos. They sang, Joy to the World, then barged in the door almost
knocking her off her feet and announced to her that they had brought the Christmas dance to her.
Laura appeared from the kitchen with refreshments to fill the dining room table and Monty
moved the living room furniture back to reveal a make shift dance floor. They had known all
along about the surprise visit from her friends! Those stinkers! She had been set up. Music was
turned on to the Christmas station and dancing began. Suddenly everyone went silent and stared
at Evena. She was in sweats. That would not do, so Laura retreated to the back bedroom and
returned with a large box. Evena opened it to find an adult sized Cinderella costume gown
complete with crown! With help from her girlfriends, she donned the dress and returned to the
party. She could not stand for very long, so her wheel chair was brought out and taking turns
each of the boys danced with their riding partner. After just a few of the Christmas songs, the
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station was changed to more appropriate teen music. Everyone danced, snacked and laughed all
afternoon. The boys continued to offer turns dancing with Evena in her chair. It was the best day
of Evena’s life. What great friends she had now!
Eventually, Evena was strong enough and able to return to school to finish out the school
year in her wheelchair. It was so good to get back to regular classes and even the teachers! She
was allowed to have other students carry her books from room to room and to be dismissed a few
minutes before the bell to avoid having to travel with the melee of the other students changing
classes. The students who pushed her wheelchair from class to class were more than happy to cut
out of their classes a bit early to offer her needed assistance. Evena was privileged to be able to
use the restricted school elevator to reach her second floor classes also. She stayed seated in her
wheel chair during the classes instead of moving to a school desk, but she was managing her
schedule well and her grades confirmed it. How good it felt to be back in circulation again, and
she had a new testimony to God’s goodness to share with her classmates along with her story of
the foolishness that had caused the accident. She continued to work on her physical therapy both
at home and with the therapist, and while she did see improvement, it was coming so dreadfully
slowly. She tried diligently to avoid discouragement.
Evena’s mother really had been working her program finally and was truly making
strides now. She had been officially released from the rehab facility and was living in a halfway
house to determine her adequacy in living in the real world once again, her ability to get a job,
and her capability of resisting the temptation to return to substances when trying times came
about. She had a mentor and accountability partners and attended semi-weekly meetings to shore
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up her skills. With time and success, she was legitimately on the path of regaining her children
this time.
The foster families and her children all approached her success with caution, hoping it
was authentic but wary lest their hopes be dashed again. Visits continued and hopes rose. Perla
had come to recognize that Evena’s accident was not the result of anyone’s negligence but her
own daughter’s impulsive silliness. She was thankful that Evena was recuperating but aware that
healing might not be total. She was also struggling to accept Evena’s evaluation that God had
allowed it to happen in order for her to feel His love that He confirmed to her through people
who served Him. That was too much for her to acknowledge. According to her a good God, if
there actually was one, should have prevented it from happening. Her skepticism prevailed.
Summer months went by and a new school year ensued. Evena’s pain in her leg
continued, but was lessening. Her energy and endurance improved, and she was able to walk
longer and longer periods now without needing as much rest. Her balance was still shaky and
climbing stairs was a real struggle, but progress was being made. The new school year she was
able to maneuver around school without the wheelchair, but she still got passing period priority
and elevator consideration. She realized that she would most likely never walk again like she had
before the accident. She wished she would be able to do so and would keep trying until maybe
she could get to that point, yet at the same time she realized for the rest of her life a limp would
probably still remain. This limp, however, would remind her of the goodness of God and the
faithfulness of His people after the water park episode. It would open the door for her to share
with others about her accident and how God had come through for her in a way that otherwise
might never have happened. Her future lay in his hands.
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At last the rehab facility and half-way house agreed that Perla was truly ready to reinvest
in community life. Even though Evena’s dad had gambled away all of the family assets and Perla
had let the house fall into foreclosure, there had been a life insurance policy from her dad’s job.
Being that he had died in an auto accident, double indemnity had contributed, so there was a nice
nest egg for Perla to begin life again as a single mother with four children. It was agreed that
taking on all four of the children at once would be too great a challenge for her, so returning the
children gradually was suggested. Evena would be the first to return since being oldest she could
not only help Mom at home but could also help with the other children as they returned. Her
physical limitations should not impede her from those responsibilities. She would be a good inhouse accountability and help to her mom to resist temptation and work her program as needed.
While the younger ones whined disappointment, everyone really was excited that the return
home goal everyone had hoped for from the onset was actually happening. In the foster care
system, that only occurred about twenty percent of the time, so everyone was thrilled to be a part
of this success story.
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CHAPTER 8--LAURA
Laura surprisingly slept late that morning and woke up in the empty house with another
headache, sad at the quiet of it since Evena’s departure some weeks ago, yet grateful on the other
hand for the difficult days of the past few years to be quelled. Evena had returned to live with her
mother, and the other three children would be following at safe increments when the powers that
be determined it was wise. Success. Bitter sweet, but success. It was time now to re-connect with
friends she had had so little time for. She would refocus her time and attention on her husband as
well who fortunately had not complained about having to share his precious wife with so many
other responsibilities.
The sadness she felt in losing this foster child was so different from her experiences
before. Justine had been a success story, but it had been so hard to give her up, having had her
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since birth. Now Laura really did not even know where she was. Reports had stopped. She did
not know why. Tina had been snatched from them in death. So near yet so far. The chance to
have a child of their own was a dream never to be fulfilled. Howard had run away, or really
sailed away and literally could be anywhere in the whole wide world floating on some battleship
or aircraft carrier who knows where. But Evena and her brothers and sister were a happy ending,
the way everyone wanted it to be. Laura was glad she had been able to be a part of it. It still hurt
though, and she missed the girl.
Laura hoped, however, never to set foot into another hospital again. The stint with Evena
was just too long, even though the outcome turned out well, if not total. Now health, happiness,
and healing were what the doctor ordered according to the will of Laura. God had to be in
agreement.
Laura had called friends from church and their Bible study group and planned a girls’ day
out luncheon for the end of the week. It would feel so good to laugh and chat with other her lady
friends again. For now the house was in need of some spring housecleaning and fall and other
seasons as well. She had kept it tidy and orderly enough, but the days of deep cleaning had been
out of the question for some time. She started with vacuuming, not just floors and carpets, but
window sills, floor molding, curtain rods and picture frames. She climbed up on a stool to reach
some of the drapes and stumbled almost falling in doing so. That was not like her but she was,
after all, not as young as she once had been. She needed to be more careful. Maybe the fatigue
she felt was just her body adjusting to the slower pace now. She wiped down the tops of artwork
frames in the family room and felt a slight dizziness when she tipped her head far up. She must
be more tired than she realized. She called Monty at work just to chat, a luxury they had not been
able to share in some time. When she spoke to the receptionist, she stammered trying to ask for
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Monty, embarrassing both herself and the woman on the other end of the line. What was going
on with her anyway?
The next morning she awoke to another headache and more crashing fatigue but this time
it was accompanied with nausea. Oh, great, not a flu bug. How like her to come down sick now
that the stresses of life had given her a reprieve, but morning coffee on the back porch subdued
the nausea, so she picked up a book to quietly read until she needed to fully start her day. When
she read the same paragraph three times without being able to carry the thought with her, she
gave up, set the book down and went inside.
She turned on background music to set the mood for more cleaning of bookshelves and
behind the appliances. The music seemed to fade in and fade out. It had never done that before.
What was wrong with that device? That was spooky. As she removed each and every book from
the bookcase and dusted it as well as its slot on the shelf, she felt a twinge of the dizziness she
had felt with the picture frames the day before. Those books must just be too close for her to
focus appropriately, somewhat like seeing stripes up close can be an optical illusion. She finished
the books and moved on to the appliances with vacuum attachments ready to remove those dust
bunnies who move in when our backs are turned. The appliances were all on wheels, so moving
them out of the way was not a problem, but she stumbled again when shoving the washing
machine back into its spot. Klutz! She had lost her touch. She got out some exercise DVDs and
set out to work on balance and strengthening her inner core. Why did that music keep fading in
and out? Very strange.
The morning of the ladies’ luncheon the headache was less prominent so that she hardly
noticed it at all but there was some nausea again and more lethargy. She dressed leisurely and
then headed to the restaurant. Oh, how good it was going to be to have girl time again! She
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would not trade one moment of the time she had enjoyed with their foster children, but still she
had missed such times with her friends. As they chatted, she shared the odd headaches, fatigue
and nausea she had been experiencing asking if any of her friends had heard of a virus or flu bug
making the rounds currently. Snickers between two friends puzzled her. To her query what they
were laughing about, they announced almost simultaneously, “You’re pregnant!”
What? A menopause baby? Certainly not. They had given up hopes of that decades ago.
It couldn’t be. Everyone got a good laugh then plunged into their entrees. Suddenly, Laura felt an
odd numbness and tingling in her ears. She got a faraway look in her eyes, then slumped down in
her chair finally falling all the way to the floor in a grand mal seizure!
The next thing Laura was aware of was a bright white light overhead, a man in a white
coat nearby and the sound of Monty’s voice clearly sounding concerned. “Honey, are you
alright? It’s me Monty. You had everyone really worried about you.”
“What happened? Where am I?” she questioned.
The doctor was the one to reply to her inquiry, “You don’t remember anything? You had
a seizure at the restaurant you were attending with your friends. You bumped your head and
shoulder as you fell, but I don’t find any significant injuries from that. You passed out with the
seizure, so your friends called an ambulance and your husband. You are in the ER at
Presbyterian Hospital.”
“Oh no, not another hospital!” she moaned with despair.
“We will just keep you overnight and monitor your condition and probably be able to
send you home in the morning.”
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That was good news. It had probably been just some freak occurrence. She had heard of
people sometimes having a convulsion for no apparent reason. There was nothing to be
concerned about, right?
Monty stayed with her until visiting hours were over and he felt confident that she was
alright and in good hands before leaving. He kissed her good night and left her feeling confident
that he would be bringing her back home the following morning, but shortly after he left she felt
that odd faraway feeling again and experienced a second, although milder convulsion. Nursing
staff were on it right away and gave her medication the doctor had prescribed in case another
episode should occur.
The doctor appeared bright and early the next morning, even before Monty came to take
her home and instead of giving her release instructions, he gave her a long list of symptoms
asking if she had experienced any of these recently. Puzzled at just what was going on, she
scanned the list. She felt shaken by her affirmative answers to so many of them: headaches,
nausea, vision difficulties, speech problems, hearing issues, walking or balancing troubles,
concentration. The doctor assured her that this menu of symptoms could mean many things, but
he wanted to run some tests to be sure they were all innocuous. She would not be leaving the
hospital that day as hoped. When Monty arrived, his optimism quickly changed to concern, but
he stood by her bedside trying to assure and encourage her as they waited for the next step.
Her physician did a neurological exam checking vision, hearing, mental alertness, muscle
strength, coordination and reflexes. He made no comment as to his findings but suggested an
MRI. After a brief wait, she was wheeled into the treatment room that contained the huge
machine. She was prescribed an injectable contrast dye administered into her vein which was the
only painful part of the whole procedure. After over forty-five minutes of much banging and
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clunking from the machine, the procedure was over, and she was allowed to return to her hospital
room. The doctor now wrote up the release papers and allowed them to leave the hospital and
return home. She was given an anti-seizure medication just in case. Results would come in a few
days.
Wait, there was that terrible word again. They expected another agonizing wait for the
results, but their wait was not long this time. The phone rang the following morning and a
pleasant receptionist informed them that Laura was scheduled for a spinal tap later on in the day.
Laura called Monty at work and conveyed her concern with this development. While he
attempted to allay her fears, inside his anxiety level soared as well, but they agreed not to panic
until the results were in.
Laura was awake during the procedure, lying on her side, hearing everything that went
on. The only real pain was a shot of numbing medication injected into the skin on her lower back
causing a burning sensation. She wished that lidocaine would have numbed her mind and hearing
as well so she wouldn’t have been so aware of the sights and sounds of what was going on
around her. It was the longest 15 minutes of her life but eventually a bandage was placed over
the spot where the needle had been inserted and all she had to do was lie flat on her back in a
recovery type of room and drink tea or coffee to alleviate more headaches. Monty was allowed to
join her in recovery until they were free to return home at last. There was only a mild soreness at
the injection site. What really troubled them was what the results would indicate.
Another call from the doctor’s office early the following day requested that the couple
meet with their doctor once again that afternoon. Monty took off work once more so that he
could accompany his wife to that appointment. The explanation sent them staggering.
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“The MRI showed a mass and apparent tumor in or around the pineal gland, a small
organ located in the center of Laura’s brain. Her symptoms are classic signs of such a tumor.
These tumors typically present with hydrocephalus, a buildup of pressure within the brain. Thus
the headaches. The pineal gland produces melatonin, a hormone that plays an important role in
the sleep-wake cycle. Thus the fatigue. The spinal tap confirmed high levels of certain chemicals
associated with the pineal tumor. These tumors ae much more common in children than adults,
but they can occur at any age.”
After giving the couple a few moments to begin to process the shocking news, he
continued. “These tumors are cancerous, but they can be slow or fast growing.” There it was.
The C word. Cancer. It sent chills though their minds, spines and hearts like nothing they had
ever experienced before. It was hard to even focus on the continuing words their doctor
conveyed. “I think it would be wise for me to refer you to a very specialized team of doctors for
further examination and more precise diagnosis to determine if surgery is indicated.”
Their next step was to make an appointment at the Southwestern Medical School facility
near downtown Dallas where some of the best specialists in the field were located. These
specialists informed them that surgery was likely the first step in the treatment needed for her
condition.
“The pineal region of the brain is very difficult to reach, so it requires a high level of
surgical expertise to remove these tumors. Therefore, we don’t make the decision to operate
casually. Southwestern has just such a team with a support group like no other. If needed, the
team will consist of experts in neurosurgery, microscopic diagnosis and oncology. They will
determine if subsequent radiation and/or chemotherapy will be indicated. It will very likely take
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surgery to determine the category of the growth and if it is contained so that it can be entirely
removed.” He assured them that only the best and latest therapies would be considered.
A CT scan was also ordered that thankfully showed the hydrocephalus to be only
moderate which hopefully meant they were catching the condition early. It also appeared to be a
germ cell tumor due to its indistinct boundaries, the most common of such tumors and thankfully
of a small size. A minimally invasive needle biopsy was ordered before any surgery to determine
further direction of treatment.
Minimally invasive did not sound very comforting to the couple. A needle inserted deep
into her brain? That sounded more like massively invasive! Proceed they would despite their
trepidation. The biopsy was scheduled to determine exactly what type of tumor they were
dealing with.
Bad news came that the pineal tumor Laura had was indeed a pineoblastoma, the
malignant variety of pineal tumor. Surgery would be the first line of defense followed by a
regimen of radiation. With aggressive treatment the prognosis was still only guarded for a
complete recovery.
Obviously, the agency was notified that Laura and Monty’s house would have to be put
on the inactive list for fostering for the foreseeable future. They did not know how long, if ever,
it would be before they could bring foster children back into their home.
Surgery was scheduled. Monty applied for and received an extended absence from work
according to the FMLA, Family Medical Leave Act. How he hoped that after the twelve
subsequent weeks allowed by the provision, he’d be able to see Laura back on her feet and able
to function once again on her own. He would deal with that as time went by. For now he just
wanted to see Laura do well in the imminent surgery.
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Friends and his family supported Monty as he waited through the endless surgery. Monty
tried to call Laura’s mother several times in Europe but never could get through. Apparently she
had moved on from the last information they had on her whereabouts and were not able to easily
track her down.
Even though this surgery was considered one of the most difficult neurosurgical
operations, their doctor was well referenced and recommended. The hours seemed to drag by,
but periodic updates from hospital staff ensured Monty that all was going well.
Finally, the main operating surgeon surfaced and reported, “Laura is in recovery and all
her vital signs are good. You will be able to see her shortly. She has already awakened briefly,
enough to acknowledge that she knows she has had an operation and to reply to being
questioned. These are excellent initial signs because brain surgery can also damage healthy cells
and tissue. There will be much to watch for and look for in the upcoming hours and days but,”
the doctor reported, “the tumor was small and well encapsulated. That certainly is good news,
however, radiation therapy will likely be indicated hereafter to destroy any remaining remnants
that were not able to be removed. It is also good news that germinomas, germ cell tumors, are
particularly responsive to radiation therapy. In fact, more than 70 percent of these tumors are
highly sensitive to radiation therapy. Surgery has also helped to relieve pressure inside her skull.
The hydrocephalus has been eliminated and related headaches should pose no further threat.
Surgery itself, however, can cause headaches as well.”
The surgeon was optimistic. Monty was ecstatic. Laura was placed in the intensive care
unit for the next few days with only Monty able to visit for short durations every few hours.
Even their pastor and family members who had come stayed outside the unit to keep from
agitating Laura. The down times about drove Monty over the edge, but his ongoing supportive
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people helped him in every way possible. They brought him food, magazines, pillows and
blankets, changes of clothes and toiletries, and stopped by to chat and pray. Finally, they were
told that Laura was being moved to a private room and Monty could stay with her continually
now. He was amazed to see her again, sitting up and moving about as soon as he entered her
room. Already the staff were planning to move her to a chair and were even scheduling a time to
get her up to walk the following day! After brain surgery? A nutritionist was called in to educate
them on how important a healthy diet would be henceforth. A rehabilitation therapist and
naturopathic clinician were also being called in. The plan was that they could all work together
for her optimal healing and progress.
The first time the nurses assisted Laura out of bed she became very dizzy and even
confused about where she was and what they were trying to do to her. Monty panicked and
feared the worst but was quickly comforted to learn that this was a very typical reaction for such
a traumatic event to Laura’s brain. It would most likely happen again periodically but was
nothing to ultimately be concerned about. It was normal. She would likely be weak and have
poor coordination and balance for a period of time. He might even notice some personality and
speech changes. All of that would take time to return to normal. How much time they could not
say. He was glad to know what to expect. All in all, Laura appeared to feel very good and only
needed minimal pain intervention.
Before they knew it or could believe it, they were being released from the hospital and
were allowed to return home. Home, what a beautiful word. They could not wait. They were
given post-operative instructions for wound care, diet and exercise. Monty could not wait to get
Laura outside into the sunlight and begin short walks with her around the neighborhood. It would
do her so much good to breathe fresh air and see wonderful friends and neighbors again who
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could cheer her up and pour life into her once more. He knew these walks would make her very
tired, but that would prepare her to get blissful, recuperative sleep afterwards.
Physical and occupational therapists would visit regularly with more assignments to work
on in their absence. Laura was also given an appointment with a neuro-oncologist to determine a
program of radiation therapy to begin soon. They were not sure if their battle with this tumor was
nearly over or if it had only just begun.
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CHAPTER 9--MONTY
It actually felt good to get out of the house and enjoy the sunny day drive even if the
pleasant trip was to drive to the radiation oncologist’s office. They were not kept waiting long in
the reception area before being called into the doctor’s office for consultation. This doctor was a
woman who was very pleasant and supportive initially, but then she became no-nonsense as she
began to explain the new journey they were about to begin.
She explained, “Radiation therapy for brain cancer patients is common following surgical
resection of a tumor in order to destroy any microscopic tumor cells left behind.” That sounded
like a very good idea to the couple.
“The type of radiation you will receive is External Beam Radiation Therapy in which a
machine directs radioactive beams into the brain from outside the body. It is a customary way to
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treat and to destroy cancer cells. This procedure has been shown many times to be effective in
stopping the growth of new cancer cells. We will use a highly targeted radiation therapy delivery
system that allows us to increase the dose as needed and precisely direct the radiation to your
brain tumor, while minimizing damage to your healthy brain tissue. But because cancer therapy
can, nevertheless, damage healthy cells and tissues, side effects are common.” That was
something they did not want to hear.
The doctor went on, “Some people have little if any side effects after treatment. We can
suggest medications and other ways to help you cope with this problem if any issues should
occur. “
She handed them a printed brochure of possible side effects for them to peruse on their
own. Then she indicated how the plan would evolve. “You'll come here to this clinic for
treatment. A large machine in the room will aim beams of radiation at your head to the vicinity
of the tumor. The daily treatment process usually takes between 15 and 30 minutes. Because
cancer cells may invade normal tissue around a tumor, the radiation may also be aimed at nearby
brain tissue or at the entire brain. You will receive treatment once a day, 5 days a week, for
approximately 8 weeks. To give you some time off during therapy and to allow your healthy
tissue time to recover, you will only come during the week and not on weekends. At the end of
each week, x-rays of the treatment field are taken to verify that everything is going properly.
Your blood counts might be checked in some situations at that time.”
An appointment was made for each morning the following week at 10:00 A.M. to begin
treatment. Friday’s appointment slot was scheduled to be longer to allow for the weekly
monitoring x-ray.
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Staggering from the weight of what they were about to encounter, they walked to the car
in silence. Oh, God, how they were going to need His strength for the next leg of the battle.
After they returned home, Laura lay down to rest while Monty opened up the brochure
the doctor had given them that detailed possible side effects of the radiation treatment. They
were much more extensive than he had expected. He read:
The side effects of radiation therapy to the brain may not occur until two to three weeks
after the start of your therapy. Many people experience hair loss, but the amount varies from
person to person. Hair may grow back once therapy is finished.
The second most frequently reported side effect is skin irritation. The skin around your
ears and scalp may become dry, itchy, red or tender. It is important not to attempt to treat this
side effect on your own, but rather to seek medical treatment as soon as it occurs.
Fatigue is another possible side effect of radiation therapy. The best way to fight fatigue
is to get on a daily exercise regimen that is tolerable and sustainable, eat a healthy diet and rely
on friends and family for support. Your normal energy levels should return about six weeks after
you finish your therapy. Fatigue may be worst two to three weeks after completion of a
prolonged (multi-week) radiation treatment.
Edema, or swelling of the brain, is also prevalent among individuals undergoing brain
radiation therapy. If you experience a headache or a feeling of pressure, report your symptoms
to your oncologist. You may be prescribed medications to help reduce brain swelling, prevent
seizures or to control pain…Your doctor can suggest ways to ease these uncomfortable
symptoms. Other possible side effects include:

hearing problems

nausea
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
vomiting

loss of appetite

memory or speech problems

headaches
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(RadiologyInfo.org)
Monty decided that this was information Laura did not need to hear. Unless she asked, he
was not going to further burden and worry her. They would deal with each event if it occurred.
Oh, thanks for informed consent! He wished he did not have all of this new knowledge.
He checked on Laura and found her deeply resting, so he retreated to his home office for
some phone calls and extended prayer time on his wife’s behalf. The church, friends, and their
home Bible study group committed to add this new development to their pleas on Laura’s behalf.
Monty tried to make the final weekend before radiation began as enjoyable as possible
for Laura. He rented some light-hearted movies that Laura was interested in, and he made her
some special dinners to try to whet her appetite. They walked some and sat out on the back porch
to enjoy the sun, breeze and occasional birds that passed their way. Attending church was still
out of the question, but Monty was able to live-stream their pastor’s message and enjoy it with
Laura from the comfort of their own home.
Finally, Monday morning arrived and the couple headed out for the 30 minute drive to
the oncology center.
“Monty, I am so sorry that you will have to do this every day for two months.”
“Sweetheart, let me make this very clear. There is nothing you need to be sorry for. I am
the one who is so sorry that you are having to endure all of this. There is nowhere else I would
rather be than right here by your side assisting you in whatever small way I can. I want nothing
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more. Remember the words we vowed? ‘In sickness and health; for better or for worse?’ Well, I
meant them then. I mean them now.”
So, the treatments began. Each morning Monty fixed Laura breakfast then drove her to
the center for the daily treatment. Some days she could eat. Other days she simply could not face
food. They were extremely anxious to hear the results that first Friday on the week’s progress.
Their fears were calmed to hear that all was well. It probably was really too soon to tell much,
but they were thankful for any good news.
Laura fared the treatments well with only minimal side effects. She certainly was tired,
but a daily after-lunch nap left her generally feeling spryer and up to some activity thereafter.
Her appetite was subdued, but Monty’s efforts and luscious meals helped her maintain
reasonable nutrition within the dietician’s guidelines. She only occasionally had a headache, but
the treated area of her scalp became very sore. It upset her when her hair began falling out, but
several of the ladies from church brought her some funky, colorful hats for her to wear. The
ladies and the hats brought a smile to her face. Weekly status reports continued to be very
positive.
Occasionally, Laura became disoriented and unable to recall people’s names and events
of the recent past, but these incidents only happened infrequently and seemed to disappear as
quickly as they appeared.
At last, the day of the final treatment and evaluation came, and they were released from
the constant appointments. Follow-ups were to be frequent, but they were able to have a life
again. Laura began regaining strength and started to resume some daily activities and jobs
around the house, but she was far from back to her old self. Monty began looking for a live-in
attendant to assist Laura since his medical leave was about to expire and he needed to return to
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work. After carefully searching he chose Reyna Katin, a young woman who had wanted to
become a nurse, but finances had prevented her from doing so. She was content to offer her nonprofessional services to complement Laura’s abilities.
Laura was pleasantly surprised at this new gift from her husband to accompany her now
that his presence could no longer be constant. She fell in love with Reyna right from the start,
and the young woman seemed to mirror her admiration for the patient. There was a new
inhabitant in the yellow room once again. On Laura’s good days Reyna was little more than a
companion. On Laura’s bad days she was called upon to wait on Laura for almost everything.
Gradually they all could look back and see that continual progress was being made.
Reyna and Laura took turns cooking, cleaning, doing laundry and running errands. Reyna
allowed Laura to do whatever she felt up to without questioning her decisions, but she was
careful to take over whenever she was needed being sure to place no guilt on Laura for her
inability to perform at that time. Laura even returned to occasional driving but only if Reyna was
in the car with her.
After a few months of Reyna’s assistance and continued support services, Laura decided
she was strong enough that it was time for her to begin giving out once again instead of all the
taking in she had been forced to accept for so long. She wanted to resume her ministry of service
to the elderly shut-ins from church, having a much greater understanding now of what some of
them were experiencing. It felt so good to see a purpose in her suffering for the past many
months. She had an experienced viewpoint now that she had lacked years ago. She would keep
her visits with the shut-ins short and only one or two days a week initially so that she did not
overtax herself. She would retain the flexibility she needed in case she had days bad enough for
her to cancel engagements. Reyna drove her initially then finally stayed at home and attended to
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household chores once Laura was strong enough to drive by herself again. Laura was so grateful
to be free to use her returning energy to help others again. As she continued to improve and
really not need Reyna very much any longer, the three of them sat down to discuss the future.
What should they do about Reyna? Should they release her since her assistance was not needed
as much any longer? None of the three of them really wanted that. They had become very close.
It was decided that Reyna was a wonderful addition to their home, so she would stay.
Life was good again. Monty was successful at work as always and able to devote the
mental dedication again that had been challenged during Laura’s illness. Laura had fulfilling
purpose once again. Reyna seemed to thoroughly love the new family she was part of and was
still a big help in so many ways. They all resumed regular attendance at church and participated
in activities that broadened their lives. Monty became active again in the men’s breakfast group.
Reyna volunteered for the meals for the sick program and regularly took food to young and old
as they recuperated from various health needs. Gradually, Laura had been able to increase her
load of the elderly she visited regularly and found great satisfaction in this service to others.
Good reports for Laura continued from the doctors and hope was on the horizon that this terrible
season was behind them.
The phone call came to Laura on a Tuesday morning as she was preparing to head out for
her weekly visit to a local retirement center. It was from Monty’s boss. “Laura, Monty is sick.
He collapsed in the middle of a budget meeting this morning and has been taken by ambulance to
Medical City Hospital. Would you like me to come get you and take you to the hospital right
now?”
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Operating on auto-pilot, she scarcely let his words sink in. “No, no, that won’t be
necessary. Reyna is here and can drive me. I don’t think I ought to step behind the wheel myself
right now. Thanks.”
She screamed for Reyna, “Reyna, come quick! Monty is sick, and we’ve got to get to the
hospital right now!”
Reyna pulled the car into the emergency drop off lane at Medical City Hospital and let
Laura leap from the car. Reyna indicated that she would be right in as soon as she could park the
car.
By the time Reyna entered the building, Laura had already been ushered up to the ICU
area where Monty lay in a coma. Reyna questioned the nurse as to their whereabouts and was
directed upstairs to the ICU waiting room. All she could think of to do was call the church and
pray. She did both.
At Monty’s side, Laura was frantic for answers but none were forthcoming. Attendants of
all sorts rushed in and out of his small chamber checking monitors, recording vital signs, reading
charts and barely even noticing her there at all. She was desperate for answers but not willing to
let go of Monty’s hand to try to locate anyone who could give them to her. He looked so vacant
and lifeless. Where was the man who had been her mainstay for so many decades? She wanted to
scream, “Monty, wake up. Look at me and tell me everything is going to be alright. Don’t just lie
there asleep. I need you. Talk to me.”
Finally, a doctor entered the room and asked if she was Monty’s wife. He informed her,
“Your husband suffered an acute myocardial infarction this morning with cardiac arrest. He has
suffered a massive heart attack. He was not breathing when the paramedics arrived at the scene,
but they resuscitated him before transporting him to the hospital. No one knows exactly how
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long he was without oxygen. He has not regained consciousness yet, but we are hopeful he will
do so. However, the longer the time before he becomes alert again, the less likely that he will do
so.” The doctor stood by her silently, sympathetic to the devastating news he had just conveyed
to this desperate wife. He continued, “I encourage you to keep talking to Monty and to try to
rouse him. I will be available if you have any questions.” He paused then left the room.
Stunned, Laura momentarily left Monty’s side to head for the ICU waiting room and to
inform Reyna of the terrible news. Then she returned to her husband’s side.
She continued to talk to Monty about everything and anything, desperate to see a twitch
of an eye or a raised eyebrow, a mouth movement or anything to indicate he heard her and was
trying to rejoin her in the world of the conscious. Several times she imagined he did respond,
maybe gripped her hand a bit tighter, blinked an eye or moved a lip. He would wake up. He just
had to. She called his family and conveyed the terrible news to them. Monty’s parents were too
old to travel and were confined to the assisted living facility where they lived. The siblings
would corral their families and head to Dallas stat.
Sometime thereafter, a nurse came in to tell her that their pastor was outside in the ICU
waiting room. She refused to leave Monty’s side to go speak to him, so she asked the nurse to
escort the man into Monty’s area. Clergy are about the only ones outside of immediate family
who are allowed into ICU rooms. Directly, the pastor entered the room and walked over to give
Laura a fatherly, supportive hug. He asked how Monty was doing, and Laura explained to the
best of her ability what had happened and where they were now. There were so many
unanswered questions. He prayed for Monty and he prayed for Laura, then he just silently stood
by and let his presence minister to her in ways no words could. She was so grateful just to have
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another body there with her. She knew he could do nothing more, but she desperately did not
want to be there all alone. She did not know how long it would take Monty’s family to arrive.
As nursing staff entered Monty’s room for the continual checking and monitoring, Laura
kept asking them if there were indications of any improvement.
“No change,” was all anyone would say.
Hours went by, and all Laura could do was stare into the closed eyes of her beloved
husband and talk to him, pray and hope. She finally thanked the pastor for his coming and
staying with her but released him to return home to his own family. She took a very quick break
while nurses were attending to Monty to step out into the waiting room and speak to Reyna
again. She filled her in on the scant new information she had and told her to go home and collect
some supplies for her while she stayed at the hospital. Reyna also promised to bring her some
food which she doubted Laura would touch. She had to try. Then she left. It was late afternoon
now, but still there was no voluntary movement from Laura’s husband. She took up her post
again intermittently speaking to him, praying and worrying. Fear tried to engulf her, but she
shoved it away frantically keeping up her vigil for Monty.
Reyna returned with toiletries and needed essentials for Laura and a sack lunch with a
sandwich, apple, cookies and packaged yogurt for her. The hospital staff allowed Laura to
remain at her husband’s bedside in case the sound of her voice would penetrate his deep coma
and encourage him to return to them. As night fell, exhausted she fell asleep on and off sitting on
the bedside chair laying her head on the side of Monty’s bed, never letting go of his hand. His
family was expected to arrive very late that night.
Normally, hospital visiting hours were strictly over by 9:00 PM. The staff were willing,
however, to allow Monty’s siblings and spouses in for a very short visit once they arrived due to
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the dire situation. The nurses probably knew more of what was going on than Laura could admit
to herself. His family finally arrived and were eager to come see their brother. Seeing their
strong, powerful brother so incapacitated was very hard for them to accept. After seeing Monty,
his siblings left and would squeeze themselves into Laura and Monty’s house using every bed
and floor space for bedrolls possible. At sunrise, the adults would head back to the hospital.
Reyna agreed to stay home with the children.
Early the next morning after the siblings and spouses had arrived at the hospital when
there still had been no apparent response from Monty, the doctor said they were going to run an
EEG on him to determine brain activity. Laura hated to let him out of her sight, but she
recognized that was something they had to do. It gave her an opportunity to connect with all of
Monty’s family in the waiting room and snatch a cup of coffee and a bagel they had brought for
her. They would be allowed to come in to see Monty two at a time, but Laura would not leave. It
seemed like an endless period until they wheeled Monty back into his former location with no
visible change in his demeanor whatsoever. Shortly thereafter, his doctor was prepared to present
the test results to Laura. Before doing so, he called the emergency number on the admission form
and was connected to the pastor and his wife who led the church the couple had participated in
for years. Libba and Cal Berkley agreed to head to the hospital post haste. When they arrived,
Laura was very glad to see them and have personal support once again, but she did not put two
and two together to realize the doctor had called them to come. After a short time in her friends’
company, the doctor entered the room having asked all of Monty’s siblings to be there to present
the results of the brain wave test. He indicated that apparently, Monty had been without oxygen
long enough that he had suffered too much brain function loss. He then informed them that the
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EEG showed there was no brain activity. Monty was straight-lined. He was brain dead. He was
only being kept alive artificially.
Unbelievable horror and grief overtook Laura. “Nooo!” was all she could say. She fell
into Libba’s arms unable to even support her own weight, sobbing uncontrollably. Cal escorted
the women to the edge of the bed where Laura broke away from Libba and clung to her precious
husband like she would not allow him to pass on without her. The doctor and her friends and
family stood by helplessly wanting to help or relieve Laura’s pain but unable to do so. Husbands
hugged crying wives, and wives tried to comfort crying husbands. They gave Laura some time to
expel the immediate grief then lead her to a chair at the edge of the small room. As
compassionately as possible, the doctor informed Laura that a second doctor had also examined
Monty and had come to the same conclusion. He was irreversibly, legally and undeniably brain
dead. They needed her permission to take him off life support.
She could not begin to express all of the guilt, sadness and fear she felt at that moment.
This could not be happening. Just yesterday morning she had kissed him good-bye and wished
him a good day and a successful budget meeting. Now here she was with the worst possible news
she could imagine. Monty was gone. She finally came to realize that the body that lay before her
in that hospital bed was no longer her wonderful husband. He had left them and was now in
heaven in the presence of God and the Savior who had purchased his redemption She had to let
what remained of him go. She had no real power over death itself. She simply had to make the
treatment choice her beloved husband would have wanted her to make. No one should ever be
called upon to make such an awful decision, but this decision lay before her and she had to go
there.
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She prayed. They all prayed. She went down to the hospital chapel and prayed some
more. They all talked and the whole family gave their complete support to Laura to sign the
release to enact the most horrible decision she could possibly have to make. Each family member
took a turn going to Monty’s bedside, hugging him and saying their final good-byes to him.
Laura understandably took the longest and stayed until the final moment. Then she called the
nurses’ station and asked them to bring in the necessary form. She only briefly hesitated before
adding her name to the bottom of the form.
A nurse then asked all of the family and visitors to vacate the room only temporarily
while Monty’s ventilator that kept him breathing was removed. Then they would be allowed to
return.
The doctor had been called in to officiate. He informed them, “Once off the machine, a
patient may or may not immediately stop breathing. If a DNR order is in place as it is for Monty,
death often follows quickly. In some cases though, a patient may start breathing again on his or
her own for a bit.”
The ventilator tube had been extracted and the family had re-entered Monty’s small
chamber. Every eye focused on Monty and studied his chest watching it rise and fall slightly for
only a few repetitions. Then it stopped. It simply stopped. It was over. While Laura cried and
once again said good-bye to the most precious man in her life, she also felt a bit of relief that
their waiting was over and gratitude that God had taken him without him having to suffer. They
were allowed as much time as they wanted with Monty’s deceased body before leaving him
behind. No one moved until Laura decided it was time. She led the way out of the ICU space
followed by his other loved ones.
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As people entered the chapel where the funeral was to be conducted, a slide show of
copious pictures of Monty from infancy all the way up until the present day was displayed with
some of Monty’s favorite hymns and praise music played in the background. Times with his
parents and each of his siblings were amply displayed. Sports he had participated in were
included as well as birthday parties and vacations. Of course, in addition to childhood, college
days and their marriage were included. There was a record of most of their courtship, the early
days of their marriage, churches they had attended, homes they had lived in and friends they had
made. Then each of the foster children made their appearance on the screen in often comical
situations but always eliciting warm memories of how much impact he and Laura had made upon
them. Some pictures of his support for Laura during her battle with cancer were included.
Pastor Berkley conducted a memorial service for Monty that celebrated his life and
comforted his grieving friends and family members but also tactfully reminded the congregation
that death was an inevitable stage of life that needed preparation as much as birth, marriage, a
new job, new home, or any other significant event in one’s life. Monty had made his preparations
long ago by giving his life to the Savior. There really was a significant amount of comfort
knowing where he was and that they would indeed see him once again. That information had
seemed like a cliché to Laura up to this point but now it took on new meaning for her.
After the service many friends and family joined them back at their house for the dinner
Reyna’s fellow meal providers had prepared. The support from so many of their long-time
acquaintances really was a tremendous help to the grieving widow. After a significant period of
time, the group left gradually until finally it was only family remaining. Reyna and several other
adults and children did the many dishes and general clean-up leaving Laura and the remaining
family sitting around the family room discussing various topics from some that related to Monty
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to others that had nothing at all to do with him. Then they would find themselves reflecting on
him once again. Gradually, children were put to sleep and adults joined them in staggered order.
Monty’s sister and one brother sat with Laura until she also decided she would turn in and try to
get some sleep. The three knelt before the family sofa and tearfully prayed before giving each
other bear hugs and then retiring. Lying down alone in that big bed was almost more than Laura
could handle, but she called upon her heavenly father for strength, then cried herself to sleep.
She actually slept for several hours until she realized it was daylight and she smelled a baconcooking scent coming from the kitchen. God bless Reyna. What a godsend she had been! What a
godsend she would be now! Laura showered and entered the kitchen to find the hoard of family
members scarfing down untold amounts of bacon, eggs, toast, juice, cereal and coffee. Reyna
indeed was performing in all her glory.
Family members lingered around for a few days helping Laura sort through Monty’s
possessions. Some things were relatively easy to dispose of, especially when some of the
brothers and brothers-in-law could use them themselves. Some of his grubbies brought laughter
to the crowd as they marveled that he had kept such junk for messy work around the house.
These did not even warrant donation to the resale shop. They went right to the trash dumpster.
Then there was that category of things Laura supposed she should part with but simply could not
bring herself to do so. That was fine. Perhaps she would always keep them, or in time she might
decide to let them go.
Gradually the family members left to return to school, work, and lives back home. They
promised to keep in touch and visit. They also urged Laura not to be a stranger to their homes
either. She planned a visit to Monty’s parents at their facility soon to share Monty’s final hours
and help them grieve over the son they had lost. She would do so soon.
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Life resumed. Reyna was such a blessing. Laura almost lost sight of this woman’s
personal grief as Reyna did so much to help and comfort her. She one day realized she had to
switch seats and offer Reyna some comfort as well. Reyna had been with them for a long time
and had grown to love Monty deeply herself, so the women spent time more like sisters than
employer and employee reliving Monty’s life and sharing their grief. Laura was so thankful that
her own cancer had brought Reyna into their lives. Yes, God certainly worked in mysterious
ways. What would she do right now without Reyna in her life and home?
Soon thereafter, Laura made the trip to visit Monty’s parents. It was terribly difficult to
share with them the sordid details of their son’s final hours. Although they all cried, his parents
conveyed their love for her and their appreciation that she had signed the release to let their son
go on to heaven when the time came. Their additional support offered Laura more relief than she
had expected. They spent hours reviewing Monty’s life, then she returned home to Reyna.
Laura realized that she needed to let her mother know of Monty’s passing. She again tried
to contact her first by phone then at the last address she had for her and waited for a reply. When
she heard nothing and was told her mother had left there with no forwarding information, she
began to search for her. It took a great deal of detective work through old friends of her mother
to eventually find a more current location for her. Once again, she tried that contact to get
through to the elusive woman. It seemed odd that her mother didn’t answer Laura quickly after
such news but then that was Mother. Some things never changed. Finally, she received word
from a nursing home facility in the city of Sheffield in the Yorkshire region of northeast
England. Her mother had experienced a rather significant stoke a few weeks ago and had been
confined to their facility ever since. It really hurt Laura that her mother had not cared enough to
even let her only daughter know of her condition. No, some things never changed.
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But then she considered, “Well, maybe her condition is such that she could not do so.”
Laura decided right then and there that she would travel to England to see her mother. It had
been so many years, but it was the right thing to do.
She rummaged through their important papers lock box to retrieve the passport she had
used on their honeymoon and for the trip to Vancouver. Monty had rubber banded her passport
to his since he knew that the next time they were required they would be needing them together.
The sad realization that such travel arrangements would never come about again was another
reminder of the painful loss she kept facing. She swallowed hard, and then she made flight and
hotel arrangements for the trip to England to see her mother. The planning for the itinerary did
her a great deal of good to focus on something other than her grief. Once the departure date
arrived, she bid Reyna good-bye or Cheerio, as the Brits might say.
The first glimpse of her mother set Laura back on her heels. Ever the high profile
organizer and getter done woman, her mother’s frail and needy body was a shock. Laura learned
that the cause that had taken her mom to England was the various war memorial parks in and
around the Sheffield local area. Her mother seemed to feel the need to be sure these memorials to
fallen heroes were kept in pristine manner, so she had traveled from one British park to another
organizing grass roots coalitions to hound city fathers into more maintenance and beautification
programs for the memorials. At least she was patriotic. None of her causes had ever been shady
or without worth. Laura was informed that apparently her mother had been dealing with high
cholesterol and high blood pressure for some time and was not faithfully taking medication that
could have prevented or delayed the complications of her conditions. She had been a sitting duck
in the sights of a stroke just looming on her horizon. The attack had happened in her hotel room
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about three weeks earlier just after a town hall meeting to address some needed landscape
improvements for the area. If she had notified emergency personnel quickly the extent of damage
would have been minimized, but she had delayed. No one knew why.
Her mother had experienced the less optimistic variety of stroke. Instead of a blood clot
which would have left a brighter prognosis, she had experienced a brain bleed or hemorrhagic
stroke which had a poorer survival rate, so she was still at a significant risk of a second stroke. It
was not good news. Blood flow to a part of her brain had stopped, so her brain had not gotten
sufficient blood and oxygen thereby killing vital operations with permanent damage. How well
Laura understood the situation having just experienced a similar situation with her husband. Her
mother could no longer walk, talk very well, think rationally much of the time or remember
many past events. The whole left side of her body had become almost totally useless. She was
incontinent and had to be fed by staff personnel. She was still able to swallow and periodically
talk with some coherency though.
Laura walked to her mother’s bedside and greeted her, “Hi, Mom. It’s me Laura. I heard
you were sick, so I wanted to come see you.”
Her mom looked up at her initially with blank eyes, then as if she was working very hard
to make her mind engage, she slurred, “Laura? My daughter? You came here to see me? Let me
get a good look at you.”
Holding back tears, Laura moved closer to her mother and let her mother run her good
hand over her face and head. It was more touch from the woman than she could ever before
remember having received.
“You’ve gotten older. You look thin. Are you taking care of yourself?”
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Not feeling like it was appropriate to fill her mother in on her cancer or Monty’s death,
she replied that she was taking good care of herself. There was no point to be served by
burdening the sick woman with more grief than she could process.
After a bit, a staff person wheeled in her mother’s lunch tray in order to feed it to her.
“May I give it to her?” asked Laura.
“Certainly, there’s nothing to it. Just be sure the bites are not too big and she swallows
before you give her another bite. Give her periodic drinks to help wash down the food. Here is a
moist towelette for spills or dribbles. She doesn’t usually choke. Press the call button if you need
me for anything. I’ll check back shortly.”
It touched Laura’s heart to be able to serve her mother in such a way. While her mom
focused on chewing the meal before her, Laura talked to her about how much she loved her and
also how much God loved her. Neither comment got much of a rise from the ailing woman, but
Laura wanted her to hear and absorb as much as possible of this important news. After the meal,
her mother fell asleep, so Laura left.
She visited her mom daily for nearly a week. During the rest of her time while she was
alone, Laura toured the Sheffield area and saw several of the memorial parks that had been some
of her mother’s passions. They were very attractively adorned, a fitting remembrance to men and
women who had served their countrymen. She wondered how much of their beauty could be
attributed to her mom.
Some days Laura’s mom recognized her daughter. Other days she did not. Some days
they could talk somewhat about childhood memories. Others not. Finally, the day came that
Laura needed to return home. When she told her mom she had to leave, it barely registered with
the woman but Laura kissed her good-bye and prayed for her before leaving. She was sad more
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for what could have been than for seeing her mom in the final stage of her life. Her mom did not
seem to be suffering physically. Mentally and emotionally she seemed oblivious to her condition.
She hoped her mom had heard some of what Laura had once again tried to share with her about
the Lord.
Two weeks after returning home, Laura was notified that her mother had experienced a
second and fatal stoke. Her attorney would contact Laura with information on her will. Of
course, Laura was the sole beneficiary of her mother’s estate. They were sorry to convey the
news.
There had been so much grief and loss, but after returning from England and then
attending to the processing of her mother’s estate, Laura began to heal. Reyna’s company had
been so helpful. Somehow seeing her mother unable to work at anything that had once been
important to her made Laura realize that she should be grateful she once again had her health.
God was not finished with her yet. It was time to get back into the ballgame.
Laura called Pastor Berkley and set up a meeting with him to re-organize her ministry to
the elderly of the church once again. The need was always there and always great. She also
called Faith Children’s Agency and told them she would have to terminate their license for
fostering. Without Monty, she didn’t think she could manage all that was required of being a
foster parent alone. The agency conveyed their tremendous appreciation for their years of service
to them and the children they had loved and cared for.
Laura resumed her ministry to the elderly gradually, only visiting a few of the shut-ins
weekly to chat rather briefly and maybe run an errand or two for them, but she knew there were
many other needy elderly being left largely on their own, so as her health and stamina improved,
she spread out and tried to see everyone at least every two weeks. To her surprise she found out
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that even in their senior years, many of these dear saints still had a passion for the Lord and were
very eager to discuss and learn Biblical truths. She determined that she would find a way to offer
them the same opportunities younger church members enjoyed of having regular Bible studies.
She recruited others from her church to assist in transportation and to set up a weekly Bible study
geared toward the elderly and their particular needs from a scriptural point of view. She
conducted the lessons herself at first but quickly concluded that was more than she could handle.
She called upon a variety of people to assist in leading the studies, both staff personnel and lay
people as well. Several other women volunteered to help spearhead areas of this new ministry
that had quickly become more than one woman could manage. Reyna was asked to join them at
their weekly meetings to assist anyone who needed help and later to bake and distribute
refreshments to everyone. Reyna loved her new assignment and eagerly supported Laura and the
project.
An important part of the weekly meetings became their prayer time. They started out in
their big group taking requests from the attendees and having a few people pray over the
requests. Then it occurred to Laura another way that would be more interactive for them. She had
the attendees break up into groups of about six and share and pray for each other. That way there
was a lot more sharing and a lot more praying going on. These were real prayer warriors, and
they certainly had the time even at home to devote to this important aspect of the Christian life.
She also asked the church secretary to edit the weekly church prayer requests so they would
remain anonymous. Then she would hand them out to her prayer warriors. The secretary and the
members of the study group were delighted. Each member prayed fervently for the request
assigned to them not just for the week but until they heard good news of how God had answered
their assigned prayer. Church members were thus encouraged to be sure to share how God
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answered the prayers they had submitted. Several of her senior group mentioned how good it felt
to be actively involved, important and needed by the Lord and their church once again. They
began inviting some of their senior friends along with them, so the meetings and studies even
took on an evangelistic aspect.
When anyone in their group was ill, hospitalized or died, all of the participants rallied
with cards, phone calls and food if they were able. Those who were still able to drive became a
constant courier service to deliver the contributions and to transport visitors. More and more
church members were called upon to provide transportation to these special members of their
flock. Laura was amazed at how God had a new way to use her and how it was being blessed. If
Monty had not died, she probably never would have walked down this path. Once again she
realized how God takes the most painful experiences of our lives and turns them into good.
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CHAPTER 10--ASTER
One lazy Saturday morning Laura and Reyna sat on the back porch enjoying the
tranquility the scene always provided. Laura still missed Monty terribly and they reflected on
many of the good old days with him and the foster children who had been around. Reyna had
never met any of them, but Laura had shared so much about each one that Reyna felt like she
knew them intimately.
While the women shared with each other, Laura’s phone rang and as she arose to answer
it, she tripped and fell. Reyna ran immediately to her aid. Laura was not injured but was puzzled
at her clumsiness. Thereafter she began having headaches and noticed nausea at times. She tried
to ignore these symptoms and simply continue the fulfilling life that had once again been
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established. When she detected changes in her speech, vision and hearing she knew she had to
report it to her doctor.
He informed her, “Sometimes even after a lengthy time has passed, long-term effects of
the cancer and radiation therapy can resurface and be difficult to distinguish from new tumor
growth. I could order another MRI, CT or PET scan, but they are not conclusive at this point in
determining if there is new tumor activity. A biopsy of the area is the only sure way to determine
its status.”
Another minimally invasive needle biopsy was scheduled. Her prayer warriors began
beseeching the Lord on her behalf.
Waiting on the pathology report was torture. Why does waiting have to be a part of life?
She had always hated the waiting. When the report came, it was not good. The pineoblastoma
was once again active. The tumor was returning and growing. They had been told that adults
with this type of cancer generally had a poor survival prognosis. She had had almost three years
of remission. That was beyond the average.
Another round of radiation was ordered. How she wished she had Monty once again to
see her through this, but between Reyna and a battalion of church volunteers, she was
transported back and forth to the oncology radiation facility and helped out at home with the side
effects. What was different this time was the weekly evaluation. This time the tumor was not
responding to the treatment. Drugs, both traditional and experimental, were tried with the same
non-effective results. She was terminal. It was just a matter of time. She was going to die.
After the initial shock, she did a lot of introspecting. She had had a good life, certainly
not the way she had expected it or even how she had hoped it would be, but God had used her.
She had had many wonderful years with an absolutely fabulous man, the opportunity to pour her
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life and soul into several special children and many terrific friends and co-workers. She had been
a part of some wonderful churches in which to worship, learn and grow and had had an ever
faithful heavenly Father to see her along each step. She had no regrets. It was time to get her
affairs in order.
One thing she wanted to do was donate some money and a memorial plaque to the Faith
Children’s Agency in Monty’s honor for all he had done and helped her do for the children God
had placed in their home through their agency. An article covering the announcement of this
honor made it into the local newspaper along with the details of the simple dedication ceremony.
Laura had been unable to attend the observance due to radiation side effects, but little could she
possibly know who all would read this newspaper article.
***************************
The day of the accident that took Tina’s life, Aster had stood by the scene where Tina lay
crumpled in the street with her body positioned in ways the body did not normally bend and
where pools of blood had gathering in several places around her. She knew she should have run,
but she somehow felt frozen on the spot where she stood. The police had come and paramedics
were arriving, hurriedly huddling over Tina. Several police officers were already questioning
bystanders as to just what had happened.
One came up to her. “Young lady, I hear you were here when the event happened. Can
you tell me what you know?”
“We were walking out of school. She told me I was…I got mad…I shoved her…I never
meant…It’s all my fault.”
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After several more questions that she didn’t even remember, the police officers who had
been questioning the crowd put their heads together and decided this had been a terrible accident,
the result of an impetuous youth and nothing more. Aster’s officer came up to her telling her she
was free to go but to give him her information in case they had further questions.
“But it is all my fault.”
“No ma’am that is not how we see it. It was an accident. You are free to go.”
She actually wished they would have handcuffed her and taken her down to the police
station, put her behind bars for the rest of her life. She felt so guilty. How could this ever have
happened?
Somehow, Aster finished off the school year, bombing her exams, but barely passing for
the year due to her adequate semester grades. She went home for the summer to hibernate and try
to make some sense of her life now. She hung around in the dark of her house for days
smoldering in her guilt and shame until she realized that if she did not do something she would
go mad, or she would do something to herself that she really would regret. Her mother
questioned her melancholy mood, but Aster simply said she was tired and just being lazy since
school was out. Then her mother would go off to work seemingly satisfied with Aster’s answer.
When Aster could stand it no longer, she knew she had to get out of the house.
She headed out the door into the sunshine and just began to walk. She had no destination
and was not actually aware of where she was walking. She just walked. A terrible war raged in
her head. One enemy condemned her for her actions. Another tried to convince her that she had
meant Tina no harm. The battle continued and seethed. As she walked on, some of Tina’s words
replayed in her head. Tina had talked about guilt, oh, not the sort of guilt Aster felt right now, but
guilt that all people share no matter how big or small. Yes, she could certainly now relate to that,
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but Tina had said there was a way out of that guilt. Really? No way. Aster felt condemned for the
rest of her life. Tina had shared some simple way that all of life’s guilt could be erased. Erased?
Was that possible? With desperation, she realized how much she needed that erasure. For days
she simply rambled around the neighborhood trying to remember Tina’s words and continuing
the staggering battle within. She knew she really needed to find out more about the hard-tobelieve possibility of having this tremendous burden lifted from her soul.
Tina had invited Aster on numerous occasions to attend the youth group at her church
with her. What had she said the name of that church was? Some community church. She
searched the phone book at home until she finally found one that she thought was the right one.
Oh, yes, Dallas Community Church. That sounded right. Today was Thursday. The group met on
Sunday night. Could she possibly just show up there? What would everyone think? How would
they treat her? She had three days to mull this over in her mind before deciding if that was a
good idea. The war inside continued to pull her in both directions trying to urge her to run from
them and then encouraging her to give it a try.
Sunday came and somehow she found herself dressing for this new experience. She
searched for any clothing that did not reek of her Goth motif and found some clothes that would
be acceptable. She drove to the church and stopped in the parking lot unsure if she could get out
of the car or not. Fear and remorse kept her hiding in her car. When she could stand it no longer,
she simply drove home quickly and retreated to the solitude of her bedroom.
The battle continued to swirl and seemed to rage even stronger. She simply could not take
this suffering any longer, so she got back into her car and raced back to the parking lot of Tina’s
church. As she sat there scared to venture forth, a knock on the driver’s window made her jump
out of her skin.
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“Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. You are Aster Moriarty, right? It doesn’t
exactly look like you, but I recognize you from school. Are you here for youth group? Would
you like to walk in with me?” Reluctantly, Aster pulled the keys from the ignition, put them in
her pocket along with her driver’s license and found herself exiting the car. It was so much easier
going in with someone to walk with, even if she didn’t know that girl.
The young lady directed her into a large, open room where groups of youth were already
huddling in small bunches chatting and laughing. A few were running around like little children.
Freshmen! They were such children. She was a sophomore now and much too dignified for such
unseemly behavior. The two girls immediately joined another cluster of girls and began talking
about the latest music group’s hit song. Aster tried to look comfortable, but inside she was
petrified and stood there silently. Suddenly her new friend dragged her away and told her she
wanted to introduce her to their youth director. Here was an attractive young man named Pastor
Mark who clapped her on the shoulder and told her he was glad she had joined them. Pastor
Mark appeared to be a very popular leader and did a good job making her feel at home. He asked
her several questions that were easy to answer and helped her open up a bit. Then he asked her
what school she went to. When she replied with serious trepidation, she thought she saw a small
rise of his eyebrows that seemed to indicate he was familiar with the tragic student’s death of one
of his youth group members at that school shortly before school dismissed. He made no move to
distance himself from her, but she wondered if he knew how intimately she had been involved in
the tragedy.
Soon the pizza arrived, and he motioned for her to get in line quickly before the boys like
vultures snatched up all the good stuff. Then he directed her back to her new friend from the
parking lot and went to the front of the room to pray for the food before everyone dug in. She
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reluctantly grabbed a slice of pepperoni pizza and followed the crowd to a place to sit and eat.
You would have thought she was a long lost cousin with the way so many of the teens welcomed
her and chatted with her. It was a real balm to her battered soul. She began bit by bit to
participate in some of the safe conversations. This was so much different from the group of high
school friends she usually hung out with at school. Not one of her old friends had even called her
since summer had begun. What kind of friends were they really? This place was not at all what
she expected. These kids were more like, well, like Tina.
When the pizza boxes were empty, Pastor Mark asked everyone to turn their chairs
towards him. Cookies were passed around, so everyone munched as they listened to him. He
called upon a select few of the youth to perform a dramatic portrayal of the parable of the unjust
steward or the unforgiving servant as he called it from Matthew 18: 21-35. Forgiveness, now that
was a subject she could relate to and so desperately needed right now, but how did he know that
relief of her terrible burden through forgiveness was what she needed to hear?
He explained, “The master in the story is like God and the amount of money the first
servant owed was like us and our sins, more than we could ever hope to repay.” Aster could
really relate to that. She knew her evil was more than she could ever begin to repay. He went on,
“The master was willing to forgive it anyway.” Could that possibly be true? “The servant just
needed to be forgiving as well to others who owed him.”
That gave Aster much food for thought. The group pretty much broke up after that and
returned to the typical teenage talk, but Aster could not get that story out of her mind. It troubled
her deeply on one hand, but it challenged her on the other as to whether or not such a possibility
could actually exist. Soon thereafter she left the majority of the group milling around enjoying
each other’s company and found her new parking lot friend.
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“Thanks for walking in with me tonight. It really made it easier to visit your group.”
“Hey, no problem, Aster. I really hope you will come again. I will hang out in the parking
lot again next week, if you like, so I can walk in with you then. Have a great week. See you
soon.”
Aster found herself becoming a regular attender to the Sunday group, even exchanging
phone numbers with several of the girls and began getting together with some of them just to
hang out. Her new girlfriends never preached to her, but she was in awe how often something of
a spiritual nature wove its way into their conversations. If nothing more, she had something to
occupy some of her boring summer time and a lot to think about besides her guilt.
At the end of the summer just before school resumed, several of the churches in the area
got together for a youth rally. It was deliberately meant to be evangelistic and succeeded in doing
so. Many of the youth responded. Lives were changed. While Aster had learned so much that
summer and had come to get into the swing of this Christian thing, she had not given over the
driver’s seat of her live to Jesus Christ. That all changed during the rally. There was a dynamic
young guy who talked to the group several times during the weekend, and the schedule was
interspersed with fun activities. Finally, one night he just told everyone how simple a thing
salvation really was. We had to do nothing at all. The Spirit of God drew people like a magnet to
steel towards the Savior. All anyone had to do was let go of their resistance and their pride. Most
people generally felt like they should be able to handle their wrongs on their own, but that would
never be enough. What was required was to let the Savior come in to sit on the director’s chair of
their lives.
It all came together, and Aster finally understood. She enthusiastically attended the great
exchange and traded her sin for the cleansing of the Lord and his righteousness.
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Aster still struggled with guilt, especially when school resumed and she had to revisit the
scene of the incident, but she knew each time she felt that pang of guilt, it was a lie. She was
forgiven and free of that burden. Sometimes the heart is slow to accept what the brain knows to
be true. She also wondered if she would have come to Christ if Tina had lived. Maybe so, maybe
not. Even the horrible reality of that day back in May had been a part of directing her to the Lord.
God had indeed worked something terribly bad into something for her eternal good. What an
amazing God!
It had been many years now since that life-changing summer. Aster had finished high
school, attended college where she met a good man from the new church she attended in her
college town who married her and had now given her three wonderful children. She had raised
her children in the church and watched each one of them grow to have their own faith in the God
their parents shared. She had never forgotten Tina, the girl who had given her life as a testimony
to her.
Then came that day she saw the newspaper article with Monty’s name honored. There
had been a dedicatory service and a memorial plaque placed at Faith Children’s Agency
commemorating the work of the family who had fostered Tina. Aster knew what she needed to
do. She had to contact Tina’s foster family!
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CHAPTER 11-REUNION
Reyna answered the doorbell to find an attractive young woman who inquired if she might
see the woman who had been foster mother to Tina Elliott. Reyna recognized Tina’s name but
had no idea who this young woman might be. She asked Laura if she was up to a visitor and if
she knew someone who had been previously named Aster Moriarty. Laura was having a good
day, but it took her a moment to try to place the name. She finally recollected a girl named Aster
who had been a friend or maybe it would be more appropriate to call her an acquaintance of
Tina’s. Yes, Aster was the name of the girl who only wore black who had come to their house
several times before Tina got her life together. Could this possibly be the same girl? She had no
idea, but she told Reyna to invite her in.
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The next hour was spent with Aster sharing details about the story of the accident, her
part in it and how God had used it and Tina to show her the way to Him.
“Even after her death, Tina’s words had made all the difference for me.”
Then Aster shared about the husband and children she now had. Laura had never heard
all these details of the accident that took Tina’s life that Aster now shared. Then Aster did
something Laura never would have expected.
“There is something very important I need to ask of you, ma’am. After what I did to the
girl who was so important to you, do you think you could ever forgive me for taking away the
life of the girl who was to become your daughter? I know that everything I have today is because
of Tina’s dedication to share her God with me and that all of the good in my life was at Tina’s
expense and therefore at your expense as well.” Her tears became inconsolable.
“Oh, you precious woman. Have you been carrying this pain and guilt for all these years?
It was an accident. I know that. You need to accept that as well. I hold no anger towards you or
wish any vengeance against you. Tina would be so thrilled to know that her testimony to you did
lead you to her Savior. And if her death is what it took to show you the way, then God used it in
a very good way. That is how He works. I am so very glad to see you again after all this time,
and I am so delighted you came to see me before it is too late.”
“Too late? What do you mean?”
“Aster, I have cancer. It was in remission for about three years, but it has returned and
soon it will take my life. I’m glad we were able to have this talk before I am gone.”
“I am so sorry to hear this. Do you mind if I drop by now and then to see you again?”
“No, of course not. Please do. I would love it. Seeing you again in a small way is like
having a piece of Tina with me once more.”
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They embraced as if they had been long lost friends and then Aster left. Good as it was to
see or maybe meet Aster, it had really tired her out. Laura needed a nap.
Aster did come by several times again in the next few weeks, sometimes bringing her
well-behaved little men with her. Some days Reyna would allow them to see Laura. Other days
Reyna had been forced to tell them, “Laura simply is not up to visitors today, but please try
again, or maybe call ahead first to see if Laura is doing well enough to see you or not.”
Faith Children’s Agency had become aware of Laura’s relapsed cancer when she had
recently donated the memorial plaque in honor of Monty. They decided it was within their
jurisdiction to notify the children, now adults, whom Monty and Laura had fostered and let them
know the status of their former foster family.
Evena was the first to respond. Her phone call was answered by Reyna. An appointment
was made for the following Saturday. Laura was excited to hear of the pending visit with this
precious girl. While she would have told the agency not to bother her former foster children,
actually she was so glad they had done it. She would be getting to see Evena again.
Evena was now 21. Her mother was doing well and the other two sisters and her brother
were giving her typical teenage trouble, but nothing out of the ordinary. They had been able to
make a happy family unit finally.
“I am a junior at TWU in Denton studying physical therapy. TWU is the best school in
the state for such medical degrees, and I want to be the best PT possible. You know, I still walk
with a limp that reminds me of the foolish accident I experienced while living with you and
Monty, but it also reminds me of the great God who came through for me during my injury and
recuperation. I want to be a physical therapist so I can help other people who need physical
rehabilitation like I received. God has directed me towards this profession as a result of my
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experiences. My limp has indeed given me countless opportunities especially in my field of
study to share how God has worked so much good through this bad time in my life.
“I still have the silly Cinderella crown from the impromptu Christmas dance you all
planned for me when I was so sad at missing the shindig. That dress has long ago seen better
days, but the memories are as clear as if they had happened yesterday.”
Laura laughed as Evena recounted some of the memories. She was also so glad to hear
that Evena’s family remained a success in the foster family’s return home program’s goal.
Evena also shared, “I have also found a new church in Denton that I love. It has a vibrant
college and career group that encourages all of the members to chase seriously after the Lord. It
is keeping me accountable to God under the pressures and temptations I face in college life and
the world. I have met some wonderful girls and a few great guys in the group. One of these
young man is becoming very special to me.”
Who knew where that might lead?
“Getting my degree, though, still comes first, a powerful first.”
Laura remembered her own college days and how she had worked to balance studying
and pursuing her degree with dating and spending time with Monty. It had been a hard
equilibrium to maintain, but she had done it and she felt comfortable Evena would, too. When
Evena set her mind on something, she made it happen.
“College life is keeping me very busy, but I promise to stay in touch with you and visit
again as soon as possible.”
It was so good to see her again and hear the uplifting news of how her life was
progressing. Laura would be sure to add Evena’s new life details to her prayers on the girl’s
behalf. She hated for the visit to end.
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The next few days were rough for Laura, therefore for Reyna as well. Hospice had been
called in to assist Reyna in Laura’s care. Laura found herself becoming more and more
disoriented, not knowing what day of the week it was or even what month. She was not sure if
she had been bathed that day or sometimes if it was day or night. Headache pain was becoming
worse, so pain medication had been increased. A part of the hospice team, a visiting nurse, came
by regularly to monitor her medication needs. Nausea and vomiting had become an all too
frequent companion, so anti-nausea medication was also now to her prescription list.
She got weaker and weaker making it very hard for Reyna to move her to the porch for
fresh air or to help her attend to hygiene issues. Laura also insisted that Reyna take frequent
periods off for recuperation herself. The hospice workers had become such a blessing both to
Laura and Reyna as well to assist in her needs. Laura was all too aware of how difficult her
management had come to be.
A surprise visit from Justine followed a few days later when she arrived with two
rambunctious little boys in tow. Laura had no idea that she and Justine would also be reunited.
Justine was pushing 30 now, happily married to a man who encouraged her to be a stay-at-home
mom with one preschooler and another son in first grade. Laura was thrilled to meet her two little
guys but with their degree of energy, they were quickly released into Reyna’s care. Laura and
Justine sat down to chat and fill in details of the last 17 years. So much had happened.
“Mom and I lived with my grandmother like it was arranged when Mom got out of prison
until Grandma developed Alzheimers and had to be moved to a nursing home. She died a few
years later. Then I just lived with my mom until Mom died about 10 years ago from
complications of diabetes.”
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Laura told her, “Oh, Justine, I am so sorry to hear of your mom’s death.” That explained
why the news on Justine had suddenly just stopped. Her mother had never let on that she herself
was sick.
“When I was almost 20, I decided to attend college to prepare for some sort of life ahead.
I was one of the oldest freshmen, but I didn’t care. After only a year in school I met a college
senior who was studying aeronautical engineering. He graduated and took a job at NASA’s
Johnson Space Center Houston, which is not really located in Houston at all. It is in Clear Lake
City, Texas. I tried one more semester of college doing the remote relationship thing, then I gave
up and married the guy. We simply hated trying to maintain the long distance connection. I have
never regretted it.
“I have even gotten to meet some astronauts. My older boy is sure he wants to be an
astronaut when he grows up. The younger one just wants to be Spider Man!”
“Yes, Justine, I am so pleased to hear how well you are doing and all the news you have
to share.”
“I never forgot my Meemee and Lala. You both were so good to me in my early years.
Unfortunately, Mom and I experienced some rough spots trying to bond to each other since we
had not shared life together for my first 12 years, and I regret some of the things I said and did to
her when I was a ‘tween and then a teenager, but we worked out our differences really well
before mom’s death.
“I am so sorry I never contacted you again after I left. It just hurt too much to think about
you and Monty and remember how much a part of your family I had been. It was selfish of me to
think only of myself. I never considered your feelings. Kids can be so self-centered.”
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“I can understand how hard it was for both you and your mother coming together after so
many years apart, but I am so glad to hear you worked it all out.”
“Yes, Laura, and I have come to realize that learning to be a mother had just been hard
for Mom. I understand that now that I am a mother myself.” They shared some mothering
experiences back and forth until Justine changed the subject.
“I am so sorry to hear of Monty’s death. That must have been terrible for you. He was
such a wonderful man. I loved him a lot.”
Laura shared with Justine about the other foster children who had shared her yellow room
and corner bus stop over the ensuing years, the laughter and the tears. She also told her of her
first bout with cancer, the victorious remission and now its return. She shared her difficulty in
dealing with the loss of Monty, but her ongoing trust that God had always known what He was
doing. Everything had always been in their best interest.
“I confess that during the years we were with my grandmother and then when I was just
with my mother, church had not been very important to me,” Justine confided. “Mother faithfully
went to church, served there and shared with me trying to engage me, but I had not been too
receptive, not like I had been as a child with you and Monty. Bitterness and frustration with my
life had instilled a rebellion in my heart that I blamed at least partially on God.
“After Grandma and Mother died I sold the house that had become mine and used that
money to go off to college. My brother Bubba had not been interested in the house since he was
still in the Navy having made it his career. I pretty much left God back in Shiner, but He did not
leave me. God had a plan like He always does. He followed me wherever I went.
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“Along the way through my teen years, I discovered that I had a good singing voice and I
loved to sing, so I planned to pursue a degree in vocal music. I thought I knew what I wanted to
do.”
“Yes, I remember from the time you were a very little girl how much you always loved to
sing. You brought such lovely melodies into our home. And, yes, you had a pretty little voice.”
“Well, since my aeronautical engineer was a dedicated Christian, he led me back into the
arms of my heavenly Father. I learned to accept and forgive. It was hard, but I am so glad I did.
It was good to be back there again. Now we are dedicated church attenders and all four of us are
active in a variety of church activities. I used to sing in the church praise group when we were
newly married and I still sing solos regularly. Now that my boys are old enough, I have begun
leading the children’s choir. My fellows love singing in our choir and sing around the house all
the time. The guys love to learn about all of the Bible stories and are good little memorizers of
Bible verses, too. I look forward to the days when they will make their own personal professions
of faith. I pray for them for that day.”
Laura committed to do so as well.
They could hear whining coming from the other part of the house and realized there were
two little boys who were getting hungry and tired and one grown woman who was probably
getting just as whiney and tired herself. They all needed to end the visit. The boys came back in
one final time and gave Laura a hug with each one telling her, “Lala, I love you.”
Then Justine did the same. It had been so long since Laura had been called Lala. How
precious it sounded. Laura knew that Meemee was watching over them from heaven hearing his
endearing name called again as well.
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Laura continued to deteriorate. She became weaker and weaker, ate less and less and
slept fitfully most of the time. She hardly left her bed any more. She had noticeably lost a great
deal of weight. The hospice workers had instructed Reyna not to try to force food but only to try
to provide food that interested Laura and allow her to eat as she wished. Her breathing was also
becoming labored. Apparently the tumor was now invading the space in her brain that controlled
other control centers of her body. Hospice was providing more and more services and was
needed for Reyna to be able to continue to be able to care for Laura at home. Laura had shared
with everyone that it was her desire to die at home.
Lauara was needing more and more pain medication. It broke Reyna’s heart to watch
Laura suffer, but then sometimes Laura would rally and once more have good days when the
pain was manageable and she was coherent enough to talk with Reyna and enjoy her company.
On one of those good days, a handsome military man arrived in a taxi and majestically
walked up to the door. Dressed in full Navy dress blues, he knocked on the door which was
answered by Reyna.
“You must be Howard. How fine you look in that uniform, young man! I can’t wait for
Laura to see you. Come right this way. You know she is very sick, don’t you? But today is a
good day and you should be able to have a good chat with her. She will be so excited to see you
again.”
Howard followed Reyna down the hall to the familiar master bedroom where a very
unfamiliar Laura lay in bed only marginally awake. He noticed with nostalgia the yellow room as
he passed by.
He walked up to the bed and knelt beside it taking Laura’s hand in his own. “Hey, Laura,
it’s me, Howard. The agency finally got word to me as we headed into port in Houston that you
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were sick. I have shore leave, so I caught the first bus I could get and wanted to get here to see
you.”
“Howard, is it really you? Oh, how handsome you look in that uniform, but more than
that you look happy. That was something I don’t think we were ever able to provide for you.
How have you been?”
“The Navy has been very good to me, Laura. I had a chief petty officer in boot camp who
would not let me mope around and feel sorry for myself. He kicked my hind side and taught me
to stand tall and be proud of the fact that I was a U. S. Navy sailor. He really made me a man. He
was not soft and gentle towards me, but he helped me so much get over all the negativity I had
focused on my entire life and realize that now it was my responsibility to make something of
myself. I got my GED and took the Navy classes that trained me to be a boatswain mate.”
“Oh, I am so proud of you, Howard. We prayed that God would direct your path and help
you find fulfillment in life.”
“Laura, you will never know how much you and Monty did help me. I noticed all you did
to try to help me in school, to try to stop the bullies, to encourage me to try sports even if they
showed my terrible athletic abilities, to help me try to make friends and even to attempt to have a
wonderful date to the Christmas dance. You allowed me to pursue my love of the sea, and you
constantly showed me that God would be the answer to my needs. I couldn’t see that fact then,
but I met some guys at my first duty station on a cruiser that helped me see that God was on my
side and had a plan for my life. It was then that I turned my life over to Him and found the
faithful friend in Jesus that I had never found before. In every port we stop in I search for a Bible
believing church and have been able to find fragments of Christianity around the world. I am so
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thankful for missionaries whose efforts it is to plant churches in hard to reach areas. It gives
transients like me a chance to keep growing and learning how to live with the Lord.”
Tears filled Laura’s eyes at the wonderful sight this whole man was, who had left them a
broken, wounded child. “Tell me what it is like to be a boatswain’s mate.”
With his chest just a bit more puffed out he elaborated, “I am responsible for all the
activities on deck like the ropes and knots, painting and keeping up the ship’s external structure,
the rigging, deck equipment and life boats. I take my rotation of watches to protect everyone and
I help in emergency drills. I have done well enough in my position that now I get to train and
supervise new swabs in maintenance and operation of the equipment. I make sure the cargo,
ammunition, fuel and general supplies get loaded or offloaded correctly. I can do it, Laura, and I
am good at it. Can you believe it? I want to apply for a Navy rating job sometime later in my
career by completing correspondence courses and meeting personal advancement requirements. I
would need to be recommended by my commanding officers, but I think they will do it.”
It thrilled Laura’s heart to see this young man finally making a life for himself. Those
simple fish in his bedroom fish tank and trips to the Dallas Aquarium had paid off more than she
had ever imagined. They continued to chat about all the places around the world he had seen
until Reyna interrupted them saying that Laura looked very tired and needed a nap. With Laura’s
blessing, Reyna invited him to stay in the guest bedroom for the remainder of his leave. He
gratefully accepted the offer. The yellow room was not available as that was Reyna’s now.
A few days later when Hospice made their regular rounds, they informed Reyna that the
end for Laura was very near. If anyone needed to see her before she died, now was the time.
Reyna placed the calls to Justine who had the furthest to travel, then Evena and Aster who were
close by. Howard, of course, was already there as he was staying in the house. She invited
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Justine’s family to stay in the guest room and Howard would be moved to a rollaway bed in the
office. They needed to hurry. She did not know just how much time Laura had.
Laura’s breathing became very slow and shallow. When she did breathe, the congestion
in her lungs gave a gurgling sound. She neither ate nor drank. Her hands and feet were cold and
getting bluish from lack of circulation. She drifted in and out of consciousness and only
responded when she was touched.
Howard took up his sentry of sitting by her side almost continually softly stroking her
hands and whispering to her how much he loved her. Shortly after Reyna’s calls, Aster and
Evena arrived and positioned themselves also around Laura’s bed. Reyna brought food and
beverages to the three so they would not have to leave Laura’s side. It was good for the foster
children, now adults to get to know each other. When they were not talking to the mostly
unresponsive Laura, they chatted among themselves and compared notes on their times with
Monty and Laura. Finally Justine and her family arrived. While her husband and children settled
into the cramped guest bedroom, Justine also took up her place beside Laura’s bed. As the four
young adults conversed and got to become friends and cohorts in their grief, Laura rallied a bit
and spoke to them, confirming that she knew who each one of them was. They told her once
again how much she meant to them and how much she and Monty had impacted their lives. They
once again shared the current happenings in their lives, and Laura weakly seemed alert enough to
carry on meager conversations.
The hospice worker arrived to be present for the end. She confirmed that a last rallying
was not unusual in the final hours before death. They kept the lights low and only spoke softly
honoring the special woman who had meant so much to all of them. They took turns gently
stroking her hands, arms, legs and face. They put pillows beneath her head to ease her struggled
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breathing. Her lips were terribly dry, so Reyna brought a damp cloth to moisten them and ease
that discomfort. How she wished she could do more!
All too soon the hospice worker encouraged them to say their last good-byes. They
needed to let Laura know that it was alright with them for her to leave them and go to Jesus. One
by one they hugged her, told her how much they loved her and would miss her, but that it was
alright for her to go to heaven. They would be okay without her now.
Spontaneously Justine began to sing one of Laura’s favorite hymns. They all knew it so
well, so they quickly, softly joined in.
When we walk with the Lord
In the light of his word,
What a glory he sheds on our way!
While we do his good will,
He abides with us still,
And with all who will trust and obey.
(Refrain)
Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
Laura heard their precious voices and realized that very soon she would drift away
from these precious ones of hers and into the arms of the waiting Savior.
Not a burden we bear,
Not a sorrow we share,
But our toil he doth richly repay;
Not a grief or a loss,
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Not a frown or a cross,
But is blest if we trust and obey.
(Refrain)
Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
She also realized that waiting for her in heaven would be her precious husband, those
many little babies she had parted with so many years ago, Tina with her own little baby, and
hopefully her mother.
But we never can prove
The delights of his love
Until all on the altar we lay;
For the favor he shows,
For the joy he bestows,
Are for them who will trust and obey.
(Refrain)
Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
One day down the road these precious young people who surrounded her death bed
would also join her. Then they all would be together for good.
Then in fellowship sweet
We will sit at his feet
Or we’ll walk by his side in the way
What he says we will do
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Where he sends we will go
Never fear only trust and obey.
(Refrain)
Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
Her life had been good. Judging from the group surrounding her bed, God had certainly
been faithful to work everything together for good. It was time.
THE END
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EPILOG
After the funeral but before the house visitors left to return each to their own homes and
lives, Laura’s attorney called the whole group together for the reading of Laura’s will. Except for
Reyna, none of them had given her estate a second thought. Monty had been a very good
provider and had also invested wisely. He had left Laura a rather wealthy widow. As they sat
around the living room the attorney began.
After the initial formalities of the document he indicated,” It was Laura and Monty’s will
that each of their special people – Justine, Aster in Tina’s stead, Howard, Evena, and Reyna should each receive $100,000. Their church would also receive a similar amount.” A look of
utter amazement crossed each one’s face. They had no idea.
“Then to Reyna would be left the car, the house and all its possessions.”
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Before Laura’s death Reyna had shared her desire to carry on the legacy Monty and
Laura had left behind them to become a foster parent as well. So, Laura had decided to leave
their tangible possessions to Reyna for this effort. Reyna wanted to turn Monty and Laura’s
home into a group foster facility. She had talked to Faith Children’s Home to begin the process.
She would cram as many needy children into the master bedroom, the guest bedroom and the
office as she could fit. The yellow room would always remain hers. The money from the residue
of the estate along with the money left to Laura by her mother, if invested well, would provide
the operating expenses for the foster home on an ongoing basis. The whole group applauded
Reyna’s desire and fully supported her aspiration.
Once again, they could see that through all the loss, tears, frustration, waiting and
praying, God had used all of the events of their lives together for His good. Praise His name!
Word count 72581
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ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
When I was in about the fifth grade a new family moved in next door to us. They had a
daughter close to my age, so I spent a lot of time over at her house playing with her. Her mother
had been a high school English teacher before marrying and having her children, but she had
never waned in her love of teaching English. Somehow this mom learned that I enjoyed creative
writing, so one day she gifted me with a red Big Chief tablet that had on the first line “Carol’s
Manuscript.” She told me to go home and write a book. I had no idea how to begin, but her
encouragement towards me really touched me. I cannot remember how many times I got out that
tablet and tried to follow her lead and begin writing. The words never came. The tablet was lost
somewhere along the way, but the idea she planted never fully left. That is why I dedicate this
book to you, Margaret Stork.
I did pursue creative writing in school and loved it. In middle school I took a new pilot
program class called RWS, reading, writing and spelling. I excelled in the class and even
received some verbal accolades from the teacher on my creative writing that I had done and won
some achievement certificates in a local interscholastic contest. Thereafter whenever there was
an assignment to write an essay or story, I was delighted. The words came easily to me and
flowed onto the pages.
In adulthood I became a school teacher. I especially loved teaching children to read and
write. I hope I inspired some of my students along the way to use their creative minds to produce
written works.
Now in my retirement, I have finally found the time to more seriously consider writing
this book. My husband has also pursued book writing and he thoroughly encouraged me, eagerly
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reading each section as I went along. He cheered me on by telling me that he thought my book
was really good. To him also I owe the completion of this book.
Most of all I thank the God of all creation who inspired me along the way. I can’t speak
for all writers, but to me I know that all my writing began with a thought, many thoughts. I could
not conjure up creative thoughts on my own. Each one was a gift from him. As I headed to my
computer to expand on those thoughts, I knew the creative nature of the product was guided by
Him. As I would read and re-read each section, I would stand in amazement at the words and
story on the page. It was much more from Him than from me. Any success this book achieves
gives credit to Him. I was only the channel He used to get the message out. I really had fun
watching to see what would come out along the way!
Finally, to all you foster parents out there, I congratulate you. What you do is not easy. I
gleaned some of my references to fostering from my husband’s and my own personal experience
fostering several children. I know the difficulties and heartaches that can be experienced in the
process. None of the children in this story are exact replicas of any of the children we had in our
home. These characters are all figments of my imagination, but the heart of a foster mother was
instilled in me by our foster children. I did use that experience to create these characters. Even
though we have lost touch with most of our foster children, I hope and pray that their lives have
become worthwhile and that we planted some seeds that have germinated profitably in their
adulthoods.
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QUESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION
1. Comment on Laura’s childhood. Do you think it was abusive? Compare hers to Monty’s. How
do you think family should be conducted?
2. Has there ever been something that God laid upon your heart many years before it actually came
about? Why do you think he might do that?
3. Can you understand Laura’s blaming God when she lost her first baby?
4. What are your views on adoption? Do you think it would be a hard thing to do?
5. Do you think Diara was justified in how she handled Chad? What would you have suggested she
do?
6. What do you think it must have felt like for Laura to return Justine to her birth mother? Have you
ever had to let go of something or someone who was dear to you?
7. What else should Monty and Laura have done to help Tina deal with her loss as soon as she
joined them?
8. Is it easier to lose a loved one to sudden death or after a prolonged illness?
9. Why would Alaska feel so different from the Lower 48 states?
10. What do you think about families who took their children to live in Tent City in Skagway,
Alaska?
11. What do you think about the statement, “Sometimes animals can reach children when people
cannot?” Why do you suppose that might be so?
12. Has anyone ever played a cruel prank on you? Why isn’t it funny?
13. Why was it so important that sibling visits happened immediately for Evena, Ian, Tory and Vic?
How did this change things for everyone?
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14. Do you think it was wise for the Marshes and Williamsons to keep the children in their home
when they became disruptive to their home life? Why or why not?
15. What do you think was the worst part of Laura’s cancer on Monty and her?
16. We don’t know a lot about Reyna, but what do you think she was like? There is very little
description of any of the characters in the entire book. Do you like this approach or not and why?
17. Should Laura have gone to England to visit her mother? Did it really change anything for her to
go?
18. Which act of one of the returning foster children touched you the most?
19. Trace the thread of the yellow room throughout the story.
20. How do you think Monty and Laura would have survived all of their losses without their faith?
How did their faith help them?