OUTNORTHWEST - LGBT Foundation

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OUTNORTHWEST - LGBT Foundation
FOR OVER 16’s ONLY!
NEWS • COMMENT • HEALTH • COMMUNITY • LISTINGS
Your Magazine for Life
PUBLISHED BY
Ending Homophobia,
Empowering People
OUTNORTHWEST ISSUE 121 APR - MAY 2014 FREE!
www.lgf.org.uk
Registered Charity No.1070904
OVER & OUT!
OUTNORTHWEST BOWS OUT • WE LOOK BACK OVER 14 AMAZING YEARS!
OUTNORTHWEST EDITOR’S LETTER APR - MAY 2014
All good things
I’m not really sure how to start
this editorial. As you may have
guessed from our fantastic wraparound cover, this is the final
issue of outnorthwest. That’s it.
No more.
It’s not been an easy decision to make, and
you can read exactly why we’ve decided to
end the magazine on page 23, in a special
piece by Paul Martin, OBE - Chief Executive of
The Lesbian & Gay Foundation.
I’ve edited (and designed) outnorthwest for
14 years now, and there’s no denying the
LGB landscape has changed dramatically in
that time - especially the way we access
information. I’ve always considered myself
a bit of magazine junkie, but over the last
couple of years, with the advernt of tablet
devices, I’ve bought fewer and fewer
magazines - instead opting for digital
editions. So, in a way, I’m not too surprised
that this might have an impact on print
magazines like ONW.
might not otherwise have had one. We’ve
made a differrence. I know this because
you’ve told me. For that I’ll always be
grateful.
I’m also very grateful for everyone who has
contributed to the production of ONW over
the last 14 years. Obviously too many to
mention here, but every single contribution
has been appreciated. I’m very proud to say
that the majority of our contributers over the
years have been volunteers - some of whom
have gone on to bigger and better things.
I’d like to think that ONW had some positive
impact on those people.
Ending Homophobia,
Empowering People
www.lgf.org.uk
Registered Charity No.1070904
outnorthwest is published every two months by
The Lesbian & Gay Foundation, Number 5,
Richmond Street, MANCHESTER. M1 3HF.
General Enquiries: 0845 3 30 30 30
E-mail: [email protected]
EDITORIAL TEAM
EDITOR & LAYOUT Grahame Robertson
Finally, and without wishing to sound
cheesey, I want to thank every single
person who ever picked up a copy of ONW.
If anything you read in these pages made
you stop and think, get involved, get tested,
or even get angry - then we’ve achieved
everything we set out to do.
I’ll miss this magazine. So much. Thank you
all for giving me this opportunity.
I’m unspekabably proud of everything this
magazine has accomplished over the last
14 years. We’ve campaigned, reported,
celebrated and given a voice to those who
MY FAVOURITE
OUTNORTHWEST COVER
We’ve had some amazing covers over the years, just
take a look at our wraparound cover and you’ll see all
121 of them! My favourite was undoubtedly this one
by the fabulously talented Damien May. As a result
of this cover, bus-driver Damien went on to produce
covers for audio drama producers Big Finish, producing
amazing artwork for their Doctor Who and Blake’s 7
audio ranges. Oh, and for a final word from Russell T
Davies, why not turn to page 26...
LAYOUT & LISTINGS Mark Eastwood
NEWS EDITOR:Jen Lau
MEN’S HEALTH EDITOR Stacey Adams
WEB EDITOR Marc Robinson
DISTRIBUTION Shaun Lloyd, Sam Whalley,
James Derham; Martin Cooper.
CONTRIBUTORS
Rachel Bottomley; Lucy Rolfe; Andrew Gilliver;
Kate Hardy; Connie Lingus; Sian Lambert;
Jakeb Arturio Braden; Gaydio; Martin Cooper;
Stacey Adams; Debbie Edwards; Sam Days
SPECIAL THANKS
Sharon and Sharon; James Derham; Peter; Aderonke;
Russ Chenery-Preen; Manbears; Michael Snaith; Ian
Dyer; Paul Martin, OBE; Claire Harvey;
Russell T Davies; Sue Nzilani; Martin Wells;
Rosie Adamson-Clark; Kate Jopling.
ADVERTISING
For information on advertising in outnorthwest,
contact us on 0845 3 30 3 0 30.
Or e-mail [email protected]
Cheerio! x
IF YOU DO ONE THING THIS WEEK END HOMOPHOBIA AT YOUR OLD SCHOOL!
Were you bullied and teased at school because you were lesbian, gay or bisexual? Imagine you could go back to your old school and make it safer for those
young people who are suffering the same today. You can. For a small donation of only £20, the LGF’s Enough Is Enough campaign will send a ‘Safer Schools
Pack’ to your old school on your behalf. You can even send a personal message with the pack. To find out more, visit www.lgf.org.uk/enough today.
INSIDE OUT
REGULARS
04 ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!
We report back from LGBT Question Time.
32
f.org.u
www.lg
26
RUSSELL
T DAVIES
GAY
MEN’S
HEALTH
06 NEWS & OPINION
We look at Equal Marriage and the latest
news from across the LGB North West!
14 VILLAGE PEOPLE
The bears are back in town, We talk to the
guys behind The Great British Bear Bash.
16 UP YOUR WAY
What’s going on in your region.
38 LISTINGS
Every LGB&T service in the north west.
FEATURES
20 DEALING WITH LOSS
Ian Dyer, who lost his partner just before
Christmas talks about dealing with loss.
22 GOODBYE ONW!
It’s the end, but the moment has been
prepared for....
16
UP YOUR
WAY
AND MORE!
18 TALKING POSITIVE
A brand new regular feature.
22 OUTSPOKEN
This issue: Claire Harvey
27 WOMEN
When we grow up we want to be like
these women...
28 OLDER LGB PEOPLE
Life doesn’t stop when you reach 50!
06
32 MEN’S HEALTH
Sauna, great sex and shigella! Look
after your sexual health!
36 GET INVOLVED!
How do you fancy getting fit, and
raising money for a good cause
at the same time? Get involved!
RUSSIA
Homophobia
ACTION against
www.lgf.org.uk/enough
DISCLAIMER Publication of the name or photo of any person in this magazine should not be taken as any indication of the
sexual orientation or HIV status of that person. All views expressed in outnorthwest are not necessarily those of the Editor or
The Lesbian & Gay Foundation. outnorthwest recognises all copyrights. Where possible, we have acknowledged the copyright
holder. Contact us if we have failed to credit your copyright and we will happily correct any oversight.
obia
moph
st Ho
again
N
IO
gh
ACT
k/enou
27
WOMEN
Homophobia
ACTION against
TAKING ACTION
www.lgf.org.uk/enough
LGBT QUESTION
TIME 2014
HOMOPHOBIA
WHAT CAN
BE DONE?
The lesbian, gay, bisexual
and trans community (LGB&T)
community had their say on safety
and hate crime when Manchester
City Council hosted its second
annual LGBT Question Time Event
in partnership with organisations,
including The LGF, and service
providers from across Manchester.
The event was a great success, with
three times as many people in attendance
compared to last year. Those unable to attend
kept up with the action by following The LGF’s
live twitter feed and as a result the Twitter
hashtag #MCCQT trended in Manchester.
It proved to be a very lively debate, covering a
range of key areas including Manchester Pride,
Crime and Safety, Health, LGB&T Services and
Education.
As part of LGBT History Month, the LGB&T
community were invited to Manchester Town
Hall to pitch their questions to a group of
panellists including: Councillor Bev Craig, Lead
Member for Lesbian and Bisexual Issues,
Manchester City Council; Paul Martin OBE,
Chief Executive, The Lesbian & Gay Foundation;
Craig Harris, Executive Nurse and Director,
NHS Manchester; Tony Lloyd, Police and Crime
Commissioner; Ryan, TREC; and Jake Adshead,
Manchester Youth Council / LGBT Youth North
West. The event was chaired independently by
Ali Khan from Big Shop Comedy.
The audience really engaged and took part
in the event by asking their own questions
to the panel as well as submitting questions
in advance, but interestingly one of the main
focuses of discussion was on hate crime and
safety. The LGF’s recent report found that half
of LGB people living in Manchester experience
There was a lively debate about hate crime and
homophobia at the recent LGBT Question Time.
homophobic or biphobic hate crime, but very
few report it (see page 11) so it seemed apt
that these issues were brought to the forefront
of discussion.
The importance of encouraging people
to report hate crime was emphasised by
audience members as Police and Crime
Commissioner Tony Lloyd said: “Hate crime
needs to be challenged. There has to be
solidarity from people wherever hate crime
comes from. We’ve got to learn from the
gains made in other areas. We know that
some types of hate crime are massively
under-reported, transphobia for example. We
04 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
need to give people the confidence to report.”
Dawn Pomfret from Transforum asked why
the Greater Manchester Police (GMP) failed to
include transphobia in their hate crime poster
campaign and if the lack of visible support for
the trans community affected low reporting
rates. Mr Lloyd replied that it shouldn’t have
been excluded and that he will do everything
he can to ensure that it doesn’t happen again.
Understanding the basics of trans issues was
an important point made by Ryan from TREC,
who stated that trans people don’t feel safe
travelling on public transport to visit the Village
and to attend TREC meetings.
TWEET US!
LIKE US!
Search for ‘Enough Is
Enough! Action Against
Homophobia’ on Facebook.
OPINION PETER DAVIES
In response Councillor Bev Craig recognised that
the council have been trying to build engagement
with trans groups to improve visibility in all
areas by working with scrutiny committees and
developing strategies.
Educating young LGB&T people about hate
crime and bridging the gap between them and
the police was also considered as an important
issue. Jake Adshead from LGBT Youth North West
suggested that training the police and changing
their attitudes would be a positive step forward.
NHS Manchester are also working with the police
on broadening their understanding of mental
health issues.
The panel acknowledged that budget cuts have
reduced the number of police officers patrolling
the streets and that the perception of the Village
as being a dangerous place also needs to
stopped. The LGF’s Village Angels were shown
as a great example of the community policing
itself to help breakdown these barriers.
Safety in the Village was highlighted by The
LGF’s Paul Martin, who spoke about the Village
Angels seeing on average of up to 120 people
every evening and acting as a bridge between
venues, door-staff, the police and the emergency
services. He highlighted that the Angels
sometimes intervene with quite challenging
situations and come up with rapid, positive
solutions.
Going forward, panellists will look at actions
taken from the event and will keep you updated.
Making your voice heard and having your say on
your community about issues that matter to you
is paramount in tackling issues, such as crime and
safety, so please let us know what you think –
it’s your future too.
You can listen to the full unedited
recording of the event at: www.
soundcloud.com/lesbian-1/lgbtquestion-time-2014 A full report will also
be available to download soon from The
LGF’s website.
“If it takes Tyler Curry (an
openly gay man) to define
exactly what bisexuality is in
his online article, then it only
takes another member of
the community to realise his
words to make it a success.
I do find that terribly ironic
since whenever I read any
article written by bisexual
people, the supporters are
scarce and the comments
disparaging and filled with
ridicule.
The thing is, when a bisexual man or
women opine anything on the subject
it’s usually met with defence. You
know it’s going to be swamped with
adjectives you’ve probably never heard
before and it’s going to be full frontal
assault to the larger community. You
may have instantly switched off in that
moment and turned the page/website
because your back is up.
When Curry wrote his “A second look
at bisexuality” it was in clear simple
English. I didn’t need to commission
a sociological research project to find
the proper meaning of words like “cis”
and “heteronormative” in their exact
definitions to understand just what
the hell I was reading. It’s not light
reading and it’s quite disheartening
because what few published articles
on the subject of bisexuality there is,
they’re chocked full of this academic
reasoning. It’s as if it took a group of
gay people to set up a community,
fight to oppression, gain marriages
and equal rights over successive
generations, but it takes thousands of
hours and something like 15 post-grad
degrees to discover something as
simple as the definition of bisexuality.
Follow us and get involved in
the conversation on Twitter,
@lgfoundation
BY THE
BI
There can be such a thing as
overcompensation. Considering
the (very real) discrimination from
both straight and gay communities
it almost seems like most articles
are overwhelmingly trying to justify
bisexuality through studies, academic
sources and big grown up words
that the average person will never
understand. Why?
If you want a definition of bisexuality
–and from a guy’s point of view for a
change – then why not just ask. I don’t
see gay men and lesbian women
throwing reports here and there.
What they do is just generally accept
it (for the most part) and if anybody
disrespects it they laugh in the face of
adversity and band together. Though I
realise that the bi community doesn’t
have such a large presence, this may
explain the overcompensation to a
degree.
It has to be said that there are many
benefits however from having official
reports, especially when they outline
key topics, grey areas and issues. The
average reader who is questioning
coming out as bi isn’t always going
to understand bisexuality through
this type of publication. Support
encourages coming out, which
unfortunately the bi community has
often failed to do (for me anyhow).
I got more support from the LGF
back then than I ever got from the bi
community when I struggled to come
out, and believe me, I looked hard for
bi support”
[email protected]
Pete x
AGENDA
IN DEPTH NEWS, COMMENT AND ANALYSIS
APR-MAY 2014
GE
IA
R
R
A
M
L
A
U
Q
E
A TALE OF TWO
SHARONS
Sharon and Sharon have been
together for two years and are
set to get married on 14th June
this year. Their story resembles
a film plot - with two characters
that are so close to meeting but
are frustratingly kept apart until
the end - when fate magically
brings them together.
They both grew up in Wigan, living only
two streets apart from each other - they
even played in the park together when they
were seven years old. They attended the
same primary school, but went to different
high schools, where they only knew of one
another through friends.
Four years ago, they managed to find each
other again through Facebook and stayed
friends for a few years before they noticed
a spark had naturally developed between
them.
The beginning of their relationship wasn’t
easy as they both left their current
partners to be together. Their exes were
understandably upset, but Sharon and
Sharon both knew they had to be together.
Sharon Swift, 44, had been with her
previous partner for 26 years, since she was
a teenager, so it was very difficult for her
when their relationship ended. She suffered
As the first same sex marriages take place from 29th
March, we talk to Sharon and Sharon, who are getting
married in June
from a breakdown, but with the help of
Sharon Murphy and seeing a counsellor, she
set her life back on track.
Having lost touch since they were
youngsters, it’s only from sharing stories
now that they’ve realised how surprising it is
that they never crossed paths. On reflection,
they think maybe it just wasn’t the right time
for them to be together.
Now, it seems everything has fallen into
place and they’ve never looked back since.
Sharon Murphy, 43, never wanted a civil
partnership because she always dreamed of
being married, so now it means even more
to her that it’s about to come true.
06 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
They really wanted to share their positive
story for the first year of equal marriage
because they’re such a normal couple. But
being a normal, happy couple in love is what
makes them so spectacular in the first place.
Keep up with Sharon and Sharon’s love story
as we continue to celebrate equal marriages
on The LGF’s website.
Also we’re still looking for
same-sex couples to share
their stories so if you’re
interested then we’d love to
hear from you! Please email:
[email protected]
AGENDA APR-MAY 2014
CONTACT US: outnorthwest, The Lesbian & Gay Foundation, Number 5, Richmond Street, Manchester M1 3HF
EMAIL: [email protected] TWITTER: @lgfoundation CALL: 0845 3 30 30 30
WHY I’M RUNNING
TRIBUTE
FOR THE LGF
REV. JANE
BARRACLOUGH
28TH JULY 1963 – 3RD MARCH 2014
It is with much sadness that we recently
learned of the passing of Revd Jane
Barraclough, after suffering for some time
with cancer.
Many LGBT people will know Jane for her
role as a Minister at Cross Street Chapel,
Manchester but also as a stalwart of the
Challenging Hate Forum.
Community Engagement Officer James Derham explains why he’s
running the BUPA London 10k for The LGF’s Charity Challenges...
What made you want to undertake a
Charity Challenge?
For me, taking part in a Charity Challenge is
great because as well as raising money for a
good cause, you can set yourself a personal
challenge. As I’ll be doing a run - and I’m by no
means an athlete – I’m expecting it to be quite
‘challenging!’
Why did you want to run this race (BUPA
London 10k) specifically?
I wanted to do the 10k as I think that it’s about
as far as I’ll be able to run! I chose London as
the route is full of landmarks which I’m hoping
will distract me during the run… and also it’s an
excuse to visit London for a long weekend!
What made you choose The LGF to run
and fundraise for?
As an LGF staff member, I see the great work
volunteers do for us on a daily basis and
wanted to do something extra myself. The
wide range of services The LGF offers are
invaluable for many LGB people and I’m proud
to be running the streets of London wearing an
LGF vest.
Have you taken part in any runs before?
This will be my third 10k – I’ve run both the
Manchester and London 10k once each before.
Whilst I’d never class myself as sporty or
athletic, there’s a great feeling of achievement
you get from crossing the finishing line which
has made me sign up for a third time.
What do you think will be the most
difficult aspect of your Charity
Challenge?
In previous years, the hardest thing has been
getting motivated to stick to a training regime.
What are you most looking forward to?
I’m looking forward to crossing the finishing
line and having a slap up meal with my friends
afterwards!
Do you want to take ACTION against
homophobia? Are you up for a challenge?
Not only will it have an impact on the LGB
community, it’ll keep you nice and healthy too!
So we’re all winners! You’ll be given support
and advice to help you reach your training and
fundraising goals, you’ll also get an LGF pack
which includes guides to training, some useful
fundraising tips and a free Enough is Enough!
running top! We’ve still got individual and group
places left in the BUPA Great Manchester Run
on 18th May or the London BUPA 10k on
25th May. For further information, please visit:
www.lgf.org.uk/run Registration closes at the
end of April so don’t delay in contacting us if
you’d like to join Team LGF!
To get involved, please contact the
Volunteer Manager by email: charlotte.
[email protected] or call 0845 3 30 30
30.
We remember her constant support for the
LGBT community over the years, particularly
around holding civil partnerships at Cross
Street, which was the first place of worship
to register for same sex civil partnerships,
and Jane enjoyed conducting several such
ceremonies.
Jane began her ministry at Cross Street
Chapel, in 2008, and will be remembered
for the spirituality of her leading worship, her
love of poetry, and the depth and intellectual
challenge of her addresses, and also for her
deep compassion in her care of people.
Over the last couple of years her health had
deteriorated, and by the end of 2013 it was
clear that terminal cancer had developed.
Jane was cared for by her family in Reading,
and also in a local hospice. She died on 3
March. There was a private funeral on 17
March, to be followed by memorial services
and celebrations of her life in London on
26 April, and in Manchester, provisionally
arranged for 11 May.
Outnorthwest would like to pay tribute
to Jane and send our condolences to all
who knew her, worked with her and who
benefitted from her kindness and support.
She will be greatly missed by all.
http://cross-street-chapel.org.uk/
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 07
AGENDA APR-MAY 2014
WILL WEEK:
PARTICIAPTING
SOLICITORS
DONALD RACE & NEWTON SOLICITORS
Burnley (Lancashire) – SEE AD FOR FULL DETAILS
Contact: Sara Jane Chorkley
Email: [email protected] Tel: 01282 433241
Website: www.drnlaw.co.uk
10% of fees paid by will makers during ‘LGB Will
Week’ donated back to The LGF – supporting LGF
via paid advertising
HARGREAVES GILMAN SOLICITORS
Didsbury (Manchester)
Contact: Deborah Millington
Email: [email protected]
Tel: 0161 443 1711
Website: www.hargreavesgilman.com
100% donation of standard will maker fee will
be made back to The LGF during ‘LGB Will Week’
dependant on complexity
ALFRED NEWTON SOLICITORS
Office in Stockport, Bredbury & Wilmslow
Stockport: 0161 480 6551 –
[email protected]
Bredbury: 0161 430 8831
[email protected]
Wilmslow: 01625 523647
[email protected]
Website: www.alfrednewton.com
100% of the basic fee from the will maker will be
donated back to The LGF during ‘LGB Will Week’
CLIFFORD JOHNSTON & CO SOLICITORS
Offices at Burnage & Fallowfield (Manchester)
Contact: Christopher Furbey
Email: [email protected]
Tel: 0161 975 1908
Website: www.cj-law.co.uk
100% of the basic will fee from the will maker will
be donated back to The LGF during ‘LGB Will Week’
B. J. MCKENNA & CO SOLICITORS LLP
Heaton Moor (Stockport)
Contact: Bernard McKenna (Senior Partner)
Email: [email protected]
Tel: 0161 432 5757
Web: www.bjmckenna-solicitors-stockport.co.uk
Will do wills at half price based on a suggested
donation back to The LGF during ‘LGB Will Week’
NELSONS LAW
Online Will Service for anyone in the UK
Tel: 0800 024 1976
Website: www.nelsonsonline.co.uk
Using this online service couldn’t be easier with
a friendly ear just on the end of the line for
any questions you have. Please use the code
LGF2014 in the basket stage of the transaction
and Nelson’s will donate 10% of fees back to
The LGF over the next 12 months.
WILL WEEK
Why it’s important to make a will if you’re getting Married, you’re
in a Civil Partnership and even more so if you’re living together.
It’s important for you to make a
will whether or not you consider
you have much valuable ‘stuff’
or much cash in the bank. Even if
you are now going to marry the
love of your life you still need to
protect your loved one by making
a formal arrangement via a will.
So what’s the bad news? Well, if you die
without a will, there are certain rules which
dictate how the cash, property or ‘stuff’ should
be allocated. This may not be the way that
you would have wanted your money and
possessions to be distributed. Unmarried
partners and partners who have not registered
a civil partnership cannot inherit from each
other unless there is a will, so the death of one
partner may create serious financial problems
for the remaining partner.
If your circumstances have or are going to
change, it is important that you make a will
to ensure that your money and possessions
are given out according to your wishes. For
example, if you have separated and your expartner now lives with someone else, you may
want to change your will. If you marry after
the end of March or enter into a registered civil
partnership, this will make any previous will you
have made invalid.
IS IT NECESSARY TO USE A SOLICITOR?
It is generally advisable to use a solicitor or to
have a solicitor check a will you have drawn up
to make sure there are no loop holes that could
cause problems should you die. Sorting out
misunderstandings & disputes after your death
may result in big legal costs, which will reduce
the amount of money in your estate, it’s also
very stressful for those involved.
There are some circumstances when it is
particularly advisable to use a solicitor. These
are where:•
•
•
You share a property with someone who
is not your husband, wife or civil partner.
You wish to make provision for a
dependant who is unable to care for
themselves.
There are several family members
who may make a claim on the will, for
10 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
08
example, a second spouse or children
from a first marriage.
If you’d also like to make a legacy pledge to
a charity close to your heart its important to
use a solicitor to specify either a set amount
or a percentage of the remaining estate on
your death. This will ensure that the charity of
choice can then continue to do this work way
into the future. For further information about
leaving a valuable legacy to the Lesbian & Gay
foundation please email [email protected]
org.uk
HOW MUCH DOES A SOLICITOR COST?
The charges for drawing up a will vary
between solicitors and also depend on the
complexity of the will. Before making a decision
on who to use, it is always advisable to check
with a few local solicitors to find out how much
they charge.
Solicitors in the locality of LGF’s work are
taking part in our LGB specific ‘Will Week’ from
Monday 28th April through to Friday 2nd
May 2014. If you make an appointment with
anyone off this list during this specific week a
percentage of your fee paid will come back to
The LGF to help us help LGB people in crisis this
year (varying donations see full list for details).
e
i
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CLingus
COMMUNITY
SAFETY
Half of LGB people
living in Manchester
experience homophobic
or biphobic hate crime –
but very few report it
The LGF provides a variety of services
to support those affected by hate crime
as detailed in the report – including the
experiences of Sue* who had been the victim
of a number of homophobic attacks near
her home and was concerned that it would
escalate. She reported the attacks to police,
but felt that she wasn’t getting the support
she needed. The LGF was able to support Sue
through a range of services including our pop-in
service, legal advice surgery, police surgery
and counselling service. Sue is now accessing
one of The LGF’s peer support groups which is
helping to rebuild her confidence.
The report highlights we don’t know enough
about LGB people’s experiences in other areas
of community safety because of a lack of
sexual orientation monitoring in public services.
This issue we’re talking older ladies. It
may sound crude but I hand on heart
believe that women are like a fine wine –
no we’re not better with cheese, we get
better with age!
So menopause is a thing, and yes, most of us
will go through this at some point in our lives.
We’re warned that we need to expect a decline
in our sex drive, greying hair, a decline in selfesteem and on top of all this the NHS tell us that
84% of menopausal women find sex painful. In
fact, there’s a perception that as we get older
we stop having sex altogether.
A report launched by The LGF
with the support of Manchester
City Council’s Equalities Team
- Community Safety: the state
of the city for Manchester’s
lesbian, gay and bisexual (LGB)
communities – has found that
LGB people’s needs are not being
recognised and addressed across
Manchester when they are most
in need of support.
Sadly, homophobic and biphobic hate crime
is a common experience among the LGB
community, yet reporting of it is low; nearly
half of LGB people living in Manchester have
experienced a homophobic or biphobic hate
crime or incident, but 62% of them did not
report it. Substantial evidence shows that
experience of hate crime and increased fear of
becoming a victim of crime have a significant
negative impact on LGB people’s lives.
Hello Vagina Diners!
Well I say NO MORE! If you look at the data of
STI prevalence rates (like I’m sure most of you
do) you’ll find that STI rates in the over 60s
are increasing. No, you can’t get chlamydia off
a toilet seat, so this means that many older
people are continuing to be sexually active!
This also means that there is little evidence
that services in Manchester are aware of or
meeting the needs of the community.
The LGF’s Policy and Research Manager
Heather Williams said: “We hope that
agencies across the city will take up the
recommendations in order to better understand
and meet the needs of LGB people in
Manchester.”
The report sets out a series of
recommendations, including sexual orientation
monitoring in order to improve services for LGB
people, and working together to challenge
community perceptions of hate crime reporting.
It also highlights the Village Action Group’s
emerging plan for the area – ‘healthier and
happier people to be using a safer and cleaner
Village with more to do both day and night.’
The report can be downloaded here:
www.lgf.org.uk/communitysafety
*Name has been changed to protect identities.
When you go through the menopause this will
affect you, but this doesn’t mean you have
to hand in your sex life at the nearest post
office. But it does mean that you may need to
change things up a bit. If you feel your sex-life
has been impacted by the menopause, talk to
your partner about how you’re feeling and how
this is affecting you. Maybe you need more
foreplay…I know, WHAT A SHAME! Maybe you
need lube? Your vaginal walls thin after you go
through the menopause, so you need to be a
bit more careful with penetrative sex (or just
stick to good old oral!) And don’t forget about
those STI rates – make sure you’re protecting
yourself. A couple of other tips: staying fit and
active can help diminish the negative effects
of menopause. And if you’re between sexual
partners but want to be sexually active in the
future it’s a good idea to keep the juices flowing
with regular masturbation (oh, getting older
sounds so tough!) Remember that whatever
your age, you...yes, you reading this right now,
are a fierce sexual being and you have a right
to be appreciated – emotionally and sexually by
the person(s) you love, regardless of your age,
period or menopausal state!
If you need more support or want to talk to
anyone about the issues raised in my column
feel free to email me at [email protected]
org.uk - or ring our helpline that is 100%
confidential, open 10am-10pm 365 days a
year on 0845 3 30 30 30
Kisses for both lips,
Connie Lingus xxx
11
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 09
AGENDA APR-MAY 2014
TAKING PRIDE
IN THEIR PRACTICE!
Pride in Practice is a quality
assurance support service
provided by The Lesbian &
Gay Foundation (The LGF)
to GP practices to support
improvements in health outcomes
for their lesbian, gay and
bisexual (LGB) patients, as well
as strengthen their engagement
with, and understanding of LGB
people.
Pride in Practice is a nationwide project,
check out if your GP is registered on The
LGF’s online directory: www.lgf.org.uk/lgbtdirectory
Pride in Practice Manager Kathy McGuirk
said: “Working towards a Pride in Practice
award demonstrates a GP Practice’s
commitment to delivering an equal quality
of service. GP Practices dedicating their
time and effort to ensure their services are
inclusive of LGB patients is worth shouting
about and celebrating! It can mean LGB
people feel more comfortable about talking
openly with their GP, which can only be a
good thing!” Keep your eyes peeled! ...Every
GP Practice in the whole of Manchester
and Salford are now registered to Pride in
Practice so there are plenty more awards to
come!
City Health Centre 3rd March 2014
The Dunstan Partnership 6th March
Bowland Medical Practice 28th February 2014
Didsbury Medical Centre 14th January 2014
SHARE YOUR STORY!
Do you identify as lesbian, gay or bisexual,
if so then are you ‘out’ to your GP? Do you
think it would be beneficial to you or your GP
if you were ‘out’?
If you’ve had a positive or negative
experience with your GP/nurse
related to your sexual orientation
then we would really like to hear from
you to help support the work we do
with health professionals. Call 0845 3
30 30 30 and ask for Kathy or email:
[email protected]
Bodey Medical Centre 6th February 2014
10 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
Northern Moor Medical Practice 28th November 2013
Northenden Group Practice 11th March 2014
AGENDA APR-MAY 2014
HISTORICAL
GAY CONVICTIONS
& HOW THE LGF CAN HELP
IDAHO
2014
The International Day Against
Homophobia (IDAHO), held on
May 17 every year, is a rallying
event offering an opportunity
for people to get together and
reach out to one another.
Every year The Lesbian & Gay Foundation
organises and takes part in a number of
events to mark IDAHO, and this year is
no exception. We’ll be using the theme of
Hate Crime this year, and you can expect
a Hate Crime Vigil in Sackville Gardens,
amongst other things. Events are still being
planned as this final issue of ONW goes to
print, so keep an eye on www.lgf.org.uk
for all the latest information!
In December last year, Alan Turing
was granted a posthumous
royal pardon for his criminal
conviction of homosexual activity
– but if you’re eligible for a past
conviction to be removed then
why wait?
From an older person’s perspective and their
moral standpoint, it’s important for the past to
be addressed - if you’ve done nothing wrong
or illegal then you’re entitled to have a clean
criminal record.
It’s an individual’s responsibility to apply and
all they need to do is complete a simple form.
In fact, it’s not even a complicated process.
But The LGF can help give you the support you
need to do this – from printing off the forms to
assisting with the writing and posting of it.
The LGF’s Advice & Support Manager
Samantha Days recalls speaking to Jim* who
was convicted under Section 11 of the Criminal
Law Amendment Act 1885 when he was sat
in a car with another man in a well-known
cruising area. They weren’t doing anything
but a policeman still cautioned them for their
behaviour. Unfortunately, Jim didn’t realise that
a ‘caution’ is a permanent offence, marking
your criminal record. He found that every time
he applied for a new job, his conviction would
come up on his record check. This meant that
many employment opportunities were lost over
time.
It took Jim over 30 years to get his conviction
removed from his record and it made a huge
impact on his life because now, he’s got both
a job and a peace of mind. He felt it was
definitely worth going through the process
because in the end his application was
successful. As well as supporting him with his
application, The LGF also helped him access
their counselling services.
Solicitor Geraldine O’ Reilly from O’ Neill
Patient Solicitors LLP said: “This is a very
important piece of legislation aimed at ending
discrimination but it has not been used in
the way we would have expected. We’d
encourage those who are eligible to come
forward and apply to have these records
of convictions, cautions, warnings or
reprimands for consensual gay sex, deleted or
disregarded.”
You can access our pop-in service
Monday – Friday, 10am-8pm (last
session 7pm) and we also run a legal
surgery, every second and fourth
Tuesday, 6-8pm, no appointment
necessary. For more information visit:
www.lgf.org.uk/Your-rights/deletionof-historical-gay-convictions/
*names have been changed to protect
identities.
LET US HELP
CLEAR YOUR
NAME
Did you know The LGF can
support you to apply for your
historical gay conviction to be
removed?
Please get in touch if you need
our support. Convictions under
the following provisions may be
eligible to be disregarded:
• Section 12 of the Sexual
Offences Act 1956
• Section 13 of the Sexual
Offences Act 1956
• Section 61 of the Offences
against the Person Act 1861
• Section 11 of the Criminal Law
Amendment Act 1885
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 11
We want to dedicate this page to YOU, to the people who have used
The Lesbian & Gay Foundation’s services and want to share their story with the
community. This time, we hear from Peter and Aderonke.
Peter, 55, is a regularly attendee of The LGF’s
advice surgeries and coffee mornings in Rochdale.
“I wasn’t aware of the service until I saw the advert in the local
paper for the ‘Coming Out Day’ event last year, which is where
I first met Adrian (LGB&T Community Development Worker for
Heywood, Middleton and Rochdale). He made me feel comfortable
talking about my sexuality, as well as other issues. I was advised
about different services and I took away with me several resources
so I could find out more. I’ve found it really easy to access The LGF’s
services, both in Rochdale and Manchester, so I thought it would
be a good way of meeting other LGB&T people in the borough and
potentially finding a companion.
“It’s really important this service exists, especially in Rochdale.
There will be a lot more people like me who don’t know about
The LGF and the services you offer. Having a community officer
to promote services is important for the local LGB&T community
who may need your help. I felt a lot more confident speaking to
an organisation that represents me and my sexuality. I’ve been
able to be more open and honest about myself and the support
I need. I’m now looking forward to starting a computer course in
Rochdale!”
,
PETER S
STORY
,
Aderonke s
Story
If you would like to share your story with The LGF then
please email Jen at: [email protected]
Aderonke, 47, from Manchester, is a
feminist and human rights activist who
fled Nigeria 10 years ago because
of persecution she suffered based on
her sexuality and religion. She claimed
asylum in the UK based on her sexuality
and is still waiting to be granted leave to
remain. You can sign her online petition
here:
www.causes.com/asylum-for-aderonke
“I accessed The LGF’s Befriending service
because I needed support after being a
victim of hate crime and with entering the gay
community. As a gay woman of colour, it was
difficult to identify with my sexuality openly
because being homosexual was seen as an
‘unhealthy value’ in Nigerian society while I was
growing up. ‘Coming out’ has happened much
later in my life and coming out to others has
taken me over 20 years - I was tempted to keep
quiet or pretend that I’m straight, but the trouble
12 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
is, I can’t hide my feelings forever. Furthermore,
why should I have to? I have a right to be proud
of who I am. It’s good to talk to like-minded
people and it was really important for me to
access an LGB specific service too, which is why
I started coming to the LGF. I found the service
really easy to access and everyone was there
to help me, like my befriender and the whole of
The LGF staff team.
“The Befriending Service gave me more
confidence, increased my sense of positive
wellbeing and gave me much more knowledge
about other services such as Stepping Stones,
Carousel and even services outside of The LGF
- such as social support groups and events
for gay women. I’d recommend the service
to anyone as it helped boost my self-esteem
and confidence. It’s a great service, both well
led and respectful. I’m now able to make
choices, contribute equally and emotionally to a
relationship, and see my partner as an equal to
me – much unlike the chauvinistic, dictator-type
relationships I knew in the past when I was in
Nigeria.”
DO YOU LIVE OR WORK IN:
Bolton, Bury, Manchester, Oldham, Rochdale,
Salford, Stockport, Tameside, Trafford or Wigan?
•
DO YOU HAVE HEALTH ISSUES THAT AFFECT YOU AS A LESBIAN, GAY OR BISEXUAL
PERSON?
•
WOULD YOU LIKE TO ENCOURAGE HEALTH & SOCIAL CARE ORGANISATIONS TO BETTER
REFLECT REAL PEOPLE’S NEEDS AND EXPERIENCES TO ENCOURAGE BETTER SERVICE
PROVISION?
•
CAN YOU SUPPORT OTHER LGB PEOPLE?
If the answer to any of these questions is YES,
we want to hear from you.
Find out how you can be an LGB Community Leader
e-mail: [email protected]
UP YOUR WAY
!
PRIDE SEASON
GRAB YOUR DIARIES
IT’S PRIDE!
It’s never too early to get
your Pride business sorted
so here is a list of all (that
we know of!) Pride events
happening this summer
across the North West.
Always check official
listings for latest updates.
Photo:: Sarah Quinn
BLACKPOOL PRIDE 14TH - 15TH JUNE
Blackpool Pride has again received support
from Blackpool Council and this year’s
event will be held in the Winter Gardens
on Saturday and Sunday. It will run in
conjunction with the European Single Sex
Dance Championships. This is the first time
the European Championships have been held
in the UK. Blackpool Pride are also holding a
vehicle and walking parade.
www.blackpoolpridefest.com
CUMBRIA PRIDE 14TH JUNE
Carlisle City Centre. Community and Social
events for all the LGBT [email protected]
cumbriapride.com or www.cumbriapride.org
LIVERPOOL PRIDE 2ND AUGUST
Variety of different events, from the parade,
to an art exhibition showing LGBT work.
www.liverpoolpride.co.uk
TAMESIDE PRIDE 28TH JUNE
The first ever Tameside Pride takes place at
Broadoak & Smallshaw Community Centre,
Broadoak Road, Ashton under Lyne,OL6 8RS.
Wristbands available £5.00 each. Latest info
via Tameside & Oldham Gay Society:
www.togs.org.uk
MANCHESTER PRIDE FRINGE AUGUST
Celebrating the full diversity of LGBT life
through art, sport, culture and more.
www.manchesterpride.com
OLDHAM PRIDE 26TH JULY
Oldham’s 10th Pride will take place on
Saturday 26th July at Gallery Oldham with
stalls between 12.30pm and 4.00pm. There
is also a parade at 11.45am at Town Square
outside the Spindles Shopping Centre.
[email protected]
SALFORD PEEL PARK PINK PICNIC 27 JULY
Peel Park on the Crescent. Stalls from
different LGBT Groups, music and
refreshments. Contact: [email protected]
org.uk or www.peelparkpinkpicnic.org.uk
available online, over the phone and from
a number of venues in the Village until
Saturday 31 May 2014. You can buy tickets
using credit or debit card by calling 0843
208 1844. Official ticket outlets in The
Village, where you can buy Tickets in person:
Clone Zone, Taurus, G-A-Y, VIA, New York,
New York, Thompson Arms.
www.manchesterpride.com
QUAKERS AT MANCHESTER PRIDE
15TH AUGUST
Manchester Quakers are again holding a
ceilidh for Manchester Pride. The Ceilidh will
be held 7-10.30pm at Central Manchester
Quaker Meeting House, Mount Street,
Manchester on the 15th August. Stalls
will be allocated on a first come first
serve basis. To reserve your place email:
[email protected]
WARRINGTON PRIDE 27TH SEPTEMBER
Queens Gardens, Warrington. Email:
[email protected] or go to
www.warringtonpride.com
MANCHESTER PRIDE BIG WEEKEND
22 AUGUST TO 25 AUGUST
Free Events: Manchester Pride Parade Saturday 23 August, George House Trust
Candlelit Vigil - Monday 25 August. Big
Weekend Spring Release Tickets are £18
CHESTER PRIDE 4TH OCTOBER
Grosvenor Park followed by after parties
in gay friendly venues. There will also be a
colourful Chester Pride parade through the
city centre. Contact: [email protected]
OR http://chesterpride.co.uk/
14 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
PRESTON PRIDE 27TH SEPTEMBER
In front of Harris Museum, in the centre of
Preston. Live Music from different genres,
rock, pop, disco, and delicious foods.
www.prestonpride.com
IN YOUR WORDS!
THE NORTH WEST
HOUSING GUIDE FOR
THE OLDER LGBT
COMMUNITY
RAINBOW
NOIR
AN UPDATE ON GROUP ACTIVITIES SO FAR...
Earlier this year one of Rainbow Noir’s
The year so far has been filled with
members was unjustly detained in Yarls Wood
activity at Rainbow Noir and the
Immigration Removal Centre, after much
group wanted to share a little of
campaigning the group received the news
what the members have been up
that Jacqueline had thankfully been released.
The LGBT community came out in true force
to…
For International Women’s Day, Rainbow Noir
met up with a truly inspirational woman and
pillar in the BME LGBT community - Lady Phyll
Opoku-Gyimah, co-founder and Trustee for
UK Black Pride. Along with reflecting on how
important it is to recognise and celebrate the
work and lives of BME LBGT women, the group
also got down to business and came up with
plans for a BME LGBT Herstory event to take
place in Manchester for Black History Month
2014!
Back in February Christina from the organising
group, delivered a brilliant piece of work at
Runnymede’s debate on Valentine’s Day
entitled Race and Sex, raising awareness and
starting discussions about how race influences
our ideas around beauty, sex and desire. The
debate proved to be lively and educational,
you can find out more at:
www.runnymedetrust.org
to campaign for Jacqueline’s freedom - with
over 3000 signatures collected! Following
the success of the petition the group wanted
to raise reader’s attention to an ongoing
campaign to shut down Yarls Wood. Many
women across the UK, including members
of Rainbow Noir, have been forced to endure
abuse and ill-treatment at Yarls Wood.
The community are fighting to expose the
injustices women face inside the centre and to
shut it down for good!
To find out more and to sign the petition visit:
www.refugeewomen.com/campaign
Rainbow Noir is a social and support
group that meet once a month at
the LGBT Centre on Sidney St, for
more info about the group email:
[email protected] or visit
facebook.com/rainbownoirmcr
Manchester has the largest
LGBT community outside London.
Stonewall Housing - Manchester
older LGBT Housing Group, Members
of the Anchor Housing’s LGBT group,
Tenant Participation Advisory
Service and the Chartered Institute
of Housing have produced a housing
guide for the older LGBT community.
If you are an older LGBT person in housing
need or you know an older LGBT person in
housing need, you can download a copy
of the guide.
Go to: www.stonewallhousing.org,
or www.anchor.org.uk
COMING SOON:
POSITIVE RADIO!
‘Positive Radio’, a project hosted by
George House Trust (GHT), will be
the UK’s first internet radio station
dedicated to providing incisive HIVrelated content. Not only will people
living with HIV get the chance to create
radio programmes, mentored by media
professionals, but listeners around the
world will get the chance to listen via the
internet. The project is being entirely run
by volunteers, led by GHT volunteer and
trustee Paul Graham. The station will be
internet radio and also available to listen
to again via the GHT website. Positive
Radio will start transmission in August/
September, dates to announced via GHT’s
social media. www.ght.org.uk
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 15
VILLAGE PEOPLE
N
U
F
E
H
T
ALL
LOCAL BUSINESSES, CHARITIES AND THE COMMUNITY WORKING TOGETHER!
!
R
U
F
E
H
OF T
The May Bank Holiday in
Manchester sees the tradtional
Invasion of the Bears to the city,
as Manbears host this year’s
Great British Bear Bash.
Bears, cubs and admirers will be coming to
Manchester from across the world to share
one of the Bear calendar’s main events from
2nd - 5th May. There are events happening
across Manchester, so we grabbed some
time with the organisers and asked what the
hairy ones can expect this year...
The theme for this year’s event is Big
Top – what have you got in store for
attendees this year?
As the theme suggests there are a number
of ways it can be taken! The main theme for
this year is circus so we wanted to bring the
fun back into GBBB from the Fancy Dress Club
Night on Friday through to when everyone
heads home on Monday. Each of our three
club nights will be offering different styles of
music including Hi-NRG, House and Pop. We
have got the usual events but this year there
are two new additions to the programme.
Firstly in Rem Bar on Thursday evening there
is a special Beareoke and cabaret from Bear
Explosion to start the weekend off in style.
On Saturday morning there is the opportunity
to go ice skating in Altrincham thanks to the
staff at Silver Blades who have agreed an
offer with us. As well as this there is the ever
popular Pool Party and a market on Saturday
afternoon for those who like a bit of retail
therapy.
For those who haven’t been to Bear
Bash for the last couple of years, what
would you say to coax them back?
We unfortunately had a couple of years
where due to the uncertainty of whether
venues would be available right up to the last
Roll-up! Roll-up! The Big Top is coming to Manchester for
this year’s Great British Bear Bash...
minute, the team were not able to provide the
slick, fun events we had become known for.
Thankfully, with the venues we are now using,
and those we have booked for the next 2
events, we can once again throw ourselves
into making GBBB the fun, social and totally
over the (BIG) top it used to be once again so get your circus outfits ready! What are going to be the highlights at
this year’s event for you?
For me, and I say it every year, its seeing old
friends returning and making lots of new ones.
With regards to the event itself The Bears at
The Birdcage always stands out – this year is
no exception. With performances from Wolf (
a Manchester vocal group who were
very popular on the Manbears Pride stage
last year),comedian Gary Delaney – who
was such a hit a couple of years ago and The
16 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
Queens Of Pop. We are particularly excited
to be welcoming, making his Manchester
debut, Tom Goss. Tom is huge on the
American bear circuit and is embarking on a
European tour so for us to be hosting him is
fantastic.
What’s next for the Manbears team?
We have already started planning PreHiBEARnation and GBBB18 (yes we are that
old so expect to party!) to the effect the clubs
are booked for the next year and a half! We
also, hopefully have the Manbears Presents
stage at Manchester Pride which is always
fun to put on.
For the full programme, and to book
your tickets for what promises to be
the best Bear Bash yet, visit
www.manbears-manchester.co.uk
WE
WANT
YOU!
Also taking place over the May Bank
Holiday Weekend, is the charity
fundraising event, Village People
Weekend.
Raising money for various charities - including The
Lesbian & Gay Foundation - this promises to be a
fun-packed weekend. Organisers are encouraging
attendees to come dressed as their favourite ‘Village
Person’. So why not get your friends together and
start thinking what member you could be... Police
Man; Sailor; Cowboy; Builder; Indian; Leather Man!
‘Luvyababes’ in Manchester’s Arndale centre have
promised a 10% discount if you buy your outfits
there! For more information, keep an eye on the
Facebook page:
www.facebook.com/Villagepeopleweekend/
ANGELS
HERE TO HELP
Your friendly Village Angels
will of course be out and
about in The Village every
Friday and Saturday night!
Our team of dedicated staff and volunteers
will be out on the streets, laughing in the
face of those minus temperatures and
supporting our community at weekends.
The Village Angels are there to keep people
safe whilst visiting The Village. We are there
for advice and support and are a completely
non-judgmental presence, only interested
in keeping people safe and happy whilst
accessing this space we call home! So if
you find yourself needing help, seek out an
Angel and we will keep you smiling! Here if
you need us!
To find out more about The Village
Angels visit us on www.lgf.org.uk/
Angels. Find us on twitter @LGF_Angels
THAT TIME
OF LIFE
ANDREW EDWARDS on older LGB people.
According to a Joseph
Rowntree report by Sally
Knocker in 2012 there are
between 871,000 and 1.2
million over 55s who are
LGB. It’s not something you’d
realise if you look at the
current crop of gay mags
which are clearly not aimed
at this group. It matters to
me as I am approaching that
time in my life and I don’t
want to be invisible.
To quote Dame Edna Everage I still have
all my drives and my juices. I’m not
quite ready for my bath chair mug of
cocoa and carpet slippers just yet. Or
as one the interviewees in the report
put it I don’t want to fade away. So
if we are an important demographic
where are the magazines and media
outlets specifcally for us? I think it’s
about more than just the excellent
services offered by Opening Doors
in London and our own Greater
Manchester group for older LGBTs Out
in the City. I’d like not to be invisible
when I walk down Canal St. I want it
to matter that yes I care for my elderly
Mum but who will care for me when
I get nearer her age? In recent years
there has been more talk among
service providers about specific long
term care for LGBTs but would I really
want that? We recently covered
prostate cancer on my Gaydio show
the Sunday Forum and this is a huge
issue which affects many thousands
of gay and bi men in their 50s and
beyond every year. But the coverage
on mainstream media about this
is absolutely pitiful. I don’t want to
become just a moaning old character
like one of the old gits in Harry Enfield.
On the other hand I cannot deny that I
want to wrap up warm when it’s cold
and carry an umbrella as it has been
known to rain in Manchester. Unlike
perhaps some younger members of
the community. It was brought home
to me in sharp fashion during the
budget this year with all its offers to
those on a pension. For the first time
ever I think I realised that I could be
drawing down some of my miniscule
pension pot in just a couple of years.
And don’t even start me off on the
trials and tribulations of the dating
game at this time in my life. I think
I just want us not to be sidelined. I
want to be seen and heard and yes
maybe grow older disgracefully which
sounds like much more fun. I admit
though I don’t do queues into bars or
pubs any more and am more likely to
be returning home after a meal or a
cinema trip at the time when certain
of my brethren are just venturing out.
However I am happy to confirm that
there is still life in this old dog and that
it doesn’t take me all night to do what I
used to do all night!
www.gaydio.co.uk
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 17
TALKING POSITIVE
WE INVITE GUEST COLUMNISTS TO TALK ABOUT THEIR EXPERIENCES OF LIVING WITH HIV AND
MOST IMPORTANTLY TO TELL THEIR STORY, THEIR WAY.
HIV-PHOBIA
AND ME
Michael is 58 and from Manchester.
He was diagnosed HIV positive in
the mid 1980’s but didn’t start on
medication until three years ago. In
2011 he was admitted to hospital
with serious breathing problems
which turned out to be pneumonia.
His CD4 count dropped drastically
and his Viral Load was very high.
“I am struggling with all my medication,
and I truly cannot really explain why’’
Michael says. ‘’My reasoning is the feeling
of being diagnosed all over again –starting
from the beginning and the mix of HIV
medication and other illnesses that I
am having to cope with and even more
medication to take hasn’t gone down
very well. Psychologically I am finding it
hard to ask for help. As I had no help in
the beginning I thought I could handle the
new issues, but I am struggling. My mental
health has got worse from each day and
also my lack of interest in sex. I am losing
the will to carry on. This is difficult for me as
I have always had the idea in my mind that
I am going to die alone with no support.
My ability to do normal things has lessened
in my life, even as a gay man. I have been
a strong believer that emotional support
should be available, but the mental health
support has not improved.’’
What could be done to help more
people feel comfortable about
declaring their HIV status?
“This is a question that still remains
very personal to the individual, but if
everyone living with HIV declared their HIV
status perhaps the issue may be better
addressed publicly. I came out because
I was told to communicate my status to
past relationships by my consultant so
they could be tested; this was very difficult
but needed back in the eighties. It’s also
important that campaigns are better at
helping people come to terms with their
status like other campaigns on equal rights
– people living with HIV have rights too.
This is just one example, as even in the
LGBTQ community, discrimination of people
with HIV does exist (HIV-phobia).I feel
there is a lack of communication between
men who have sex with men and the
gay positive person relaying the truth of
being positive. In some cases, and with
the gay men I’ve spoken to over the years
– I hear that ‘medications have improved
so I’m not bothered’. Sounds cruel and
untrue, but often there are some gay
men that are looking to become HIV (bug
chasers). There is still much to do, we all
have a responsibility to re-educate the gay
community.
Apart from promoting condoms
and testing what more should
organisations do?
‘’More workshops, seminars and even an
www.lgf.org.uk/men
18 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
odd conference which includes voluntary
and statutory organisations coming
together with guest speakers living with
HIV, hearing personal experiences. I feel
sometimes personal stories can be more
effective at pulling the audience heartstrings. We should do more themed
events focusing on awareness of HIV, for
example HIV testing week and World AIDS
day and at Manchester Pride’s HIV Vigil.
Also specific training sessions about the
proper use of condoms open to all LGBTQ
communities.’’
What message would you say to your
younger self about HIV?
“Talk to partners more about safer sex and
safer drug use. Have you got condoms
with you – if you are going out looking for
sex? ”
Michaels’ Blog:
http://micant1812.wordpress.com/
If you would like support on any
of the issues raised here please
contact The Lesbian & Gay
Foundation’s Helpline on 0845
30 30 30
GAY & BISEXUAL MEN
SAME DAY
HIV TESTING
EVERY WEDNESDAY
12.00PM - 2.00PM*
AT THE LGF
NUMBER 5 RICHMOND STREET
MANCHESTER
*BUT GET HERE EARLY, THE LAST TEST IS AT 1.30PM
FOR MORE INFORMATION CALL US: (10AM-10PM)
0845 3 30 30 30
DO YOU
KNOW YOUR
HIV STATUS?
Reg. Charity No. 1070904
www.lgf.org.uk/testing
BEREAVEMENT
d
o
o
g
e
v
a
h
l
l
i
w
u
o
“Y
,
s
y
a
d
d
a
b
d
n
a
,
days
s
y
a
d
d
o
o
g
e
h
t
t
bu
will become more
.”
t
n
e
u
q
e
r
f
e
r
o
m
d
an
As part of this special
issue of ONW devoted to
older LGB people, we’ve
been very lucky to chat
with IAN DYER, who
sadly lost his long-term
civil partner Alan just
before Christmas.
With such a recent loss, the pain is
still very real, but Ian was really keen
to pass on his experiences and offer
readers of outnorthwest some “tips”
on how best to deal with the loss of
a partner. Sadly, a loss like this can
be experienced at any time of life,
and Ian’s tips are relevant to both the
young and the old.
COPING WITH THE
DEATH OF A PARTNER
BY IAN DYER
It can be difficult to think
clearly when dealing with such a
personal loss, and thinking of the
‘practicalities’ that need to be dealt
with. It’ll take strength and support,
but as you’ll see from Ian’s tips the
key is to keep moving forward. And
very importantly, allow the grief to
show itself.
Here, Ian tells his story and offers his
tips on dealing with loss:
First and foremost, make sure that a will
has been left to ensure that you or your
partners wishes are carried out. Also,
discuss beforehand any wishes for the
funeral service and whether it should be a
burial or a cremation. Discuss the type of
service you’d like – the readings, hymns,
music etc. And if you’re able to, arrange to
say a few words during the service about
your partner. This may be difficult, but give
it a go.
“My civil partner Alan passed away on
18th December 2013. He was 68 years
old. He hadn’t been in good health for
some time – deep vein thrombosis,
mobility issues, etc. He was due to go
for tests for possible prostate cancer.
He collapsed at home and was rushed
to hospital. Despite several attempts at
resuscitation, Alan sadly died.
Immediately after the death of a partner,
draw up a list of who to notify – family,
friends, relations. Also and financial
institutions like banks, insurance companies
and DWP, etc. Perhaps consider asking
people to donate to one our your partner’s
favourite charities instead of flowers. I
personally have set up a direct debit to
serve as a practical way of remembering
Alan.
I want to pass on perhaps some useful tips
in dealing with the death of a partner.
When the funeral is over, take your time
to dispose of your partners clothing and
20 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
Ian (middle right) and Alan (middle left) at their Civil
Partnership ceremony.
belongings. Do this in your own time and only do
it when you feel ready. Charity shops will gladly
take items that are in good condition.
Be prepared for grieving. Both at the time, and
for some time afterwards. There is no timescale
for the grieving process, it’s a very personal
experience. But please take it from me, it will
get easier. You will experience various feelings
– anger, pain, thinking that you could have done
more. Don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal to feel
this way. Perhaps talk to people who can help. A
GP, a counsellor, The LGF, friends, etc. I personally
talked to my GP, and also to Charlotte who is
the volunteer manager at The Lesbian & Gay
Foundation. Both of these people certainly helped.
Get plenty of rest. Don’t feel guilty about doing
nothing at times. Go easy with the alcohol and
drugs. Eat well, and get some exercise even if
it’s just going for a walk. You might also find that
watch television or listening to the radio helps
to combat the silence. When it comes to special
events during the year like anniversaries, birthdays
or Christmas, be prepared for some sadness.
My roughest time so far was Christmas, but I
survived!
Perhaps focus on something to help –
volunteering, hobbies, or take up some studies.
I myself am an LGF volunteer, and I am studying
social sciences with the Open University. If you
can, have a little break, a weekend away or a
holiday. You might have to think carefully about
places to visit especially about places you may
have visited with your partner.
“You will experience
various feelings... anger,
pain... but don’t worry,
it’s perfectly normal to
feel this way.”
And what about future relationships? Above
all, take your time and be prepared for a few
disappointments. But hopefully you will strike
lucky. You may want to discuss ongoing memories
of your late partner with your new partner, but
reassure them that you’re not comparing them to
your late partner.
To quote from one of the condolence cards I
received: ‘You will have good days, and bad days,
but the good days will become more and more
frequent.’
Remember again that there will always be
someone to talk to if you are feeling low at times.
Good luck for the future.”
If you have experienced the loss of
a partner or loved one, there is help
available. Please don’t deal with the
pain alone. Call The LGF Helpline on
0845 3 30 30 30, and we’ll be happy
to talk things through with you.
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 21
OUTSPOKEN
WHO IS
CL AIRE
HARVEY?
Claire was the captain of Great Britain’s
sitting volleyball team at the London 2012
Paralympic Games and was the only out
lesbian on Team GB. Sport has always
been a big part of Claire’s life. Growing up
she was an accomplished rugby player but,
following an accident in 2008 which left her
completely paralysed in one leg, without
peripheral vision and with nerve function
impairment, she took up sitting volleyball.
Although she only took the sport up in
2009, she excelled at it and in just two
years was selected for the national team.
As well as being an elite athlete, Claire is
also Assistant Director for the charity Youth
Sport Trust. Claire was a member of the
distinguished panel at this year’s Sugar &
Spice festival at The LGF. She lives in Kent
with her 2 kids and her dog.
Sum yourself up in three words.
Intuitive, eyebrows (!), lucky
If we gave you £1million, what would
you do with it?
I would certainly go to the Caribbean whilst I
thought about it. Then I would probably use
half of it to build myself an eco-friendly, fully
accessible house from scratch and then with
the other half I would set up a charity.
Do you have a favourite quote/
motto?
First is “you don’t have to see the whole
staircase just to take the first step” and the
second is “when nothing is going right, try
turning left”
If you could change one thing about
the world what would it be?
It would certainly be to wave a magic
wand and make people only feel good
CLAIRE
HARVEY
about themselves and valued. Not only do
I think it would bring an end to things like
the tragedy of young LGBT people who kill
themselves or people needing to self-harm,
but also I think most discrimination, violence
and trouble in the world is down to people
to needing to overpower others to ease
their own sense of vulnerability. That’s the
philosophical answer… the cheeky one would
be.. if they can send one man to the moon,
why can’t they send them all?! (sorry men,
love you really!)
Which animal would you most like to
be and why?
Cookie, my 3 legged staffie. She is the most
loved, spoilt and comfortable animal in the
world! When I worked in the prison service, I
was called “the pit bull”… say no more!
If you were a superhero, what would
be your super-power?
I live life absolutely to the full, and balancing
work, training and family can feel impossible
at times. I also hate it when I’m asked to
do something that is really worthwhile but
I can’t fit it in. Therefore I would have my
superpower to be to teleport…imagine how
22 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
much more I could do then.
Where is your favourite place in the
world?
This is a hard one for me, as I have so many
wonderful friends and memories from across
the globe that I have many places that are
dear to me. That said there are lots of places
I haven’t been to yet, so maybe my heart
has yet to be stolen. I really want to go to
the Faroe Islands at the moment.
Tell us a secret about yourself…
I absolutely HAVE to wear odd socks. I even
pair them odd out of the washing machine.
At the Paralympics this was obviously an
issue because we had a set kit to wear, and
so when in GB kit I sew different colours into
the bottom of my white match socks so that
I could still have odd ones.
The best thing about being a woman is...
Being a woman is AWESOME because as a
collective I think we have the perfect balance
of power and strength against the freedom
to be sensitive, passionate and emotional.
Oh, and did I mention the ability to have
multiple orgasms? 
OVER &
OUT
LGF Chief Executive, Paul Martin
OBE, explains why we had to make
the difficult decision to end ONW.
outnorthwest magazine has gone through
many incarnations during its fourteen
years existence, but at its heart our goal
has always been to inform, educate, and
celebrate the lesbian, gay and bisexual
communities here in the North West. I’d like to
think that we have succeeded in that quest.
The decision to close the magazine hasn’t been an easy
one to make, but we know that the way people access
and use information has changed dramatically since 2000,
the year that outnorthwest was first published. Today,
we are all accessing information instantly on our mobile
phones, and online through a wide variety of communication
channels. A bi-monthly, print magazine simply can’t compete
in responding to, or delivering ‘immediate’ messages.
The funding landscape has changed too, and we have
a duty to make sure that we spend public money with
due care and diligence. The LGF, like many organisations,
is experiencing significant cuts to our funding and it’s
important for a charity like The LGF to carefully target our
communications to where we believe they will have the
maximum impact.
This is why we will continue to prioritise our focus on direct
contact through projects such as community engagement,
outreach, netreach and we will be seeking to develop more
targeted digital communications for our community over the
coming months.
Of course, The LGF will continue to supply vital news and
information to you as best as we can, and as often as
our reduced resources will allow. Our website is updated
daily, as are our Facebook page and Twitter feed. You can
also sign up to our weekly e-bulletin, which contains all the
information you would have found in outnorthwest and is
delivered straight into your inbox every Tuesday. Sign-up
today at www.lgf.org.uk
We have had some real fun over the years and as you will
see in other parts of this final issue there have been some
memorable moments, and some even more memorable
typos...who could forget ‘Judo Dench’ or ‘Nigel Martian
Smith’ to name but two!
Throughout that time outnorthwest has been edited by
Grahame Robertson who has been with the magazine
man and boy for all of its fourteen years. I would like to pay
tribute to him for his incredibly loyal and inspirational service
to his readers, without you Grahame outnorthwest would
never have achieved a fraction of what it has done. For
your service to your community we thank you deeply. We
should also recognise that outnorthwest is going out on a
high by recently winning the inaugural Co-Operative Respect
Network’s ‘Loved by You’ Award as the 2013 Regional LGBT
Publication of the Year.
We feel justifiably proud to have delivered you this magazine
for the last fourteen years, and I’d like to say a huge thank
you to everyone who has contributed to outnorthwest the
majority of whom have been volunteers, as well as to those
who have helped promote, distribute, and stock it.
Finally, to you our readers, thank you all very much. It has
been an honour and a privilege.
n
i
t
r
a
M
l
u
a
P
Paul Martin, OBE
Chief Executive
The Lesbian & Gay Foundation
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 23
GOODBYE ONW
INSIDE OUT
2000
In April 2000, the LGF took the bold decision
to launch a community magazine. Out
In Greater Manchester combined health
information with traditional magazine
features such as interviews, reviews, vox
pops and volunteer involvement in the
production of the magazine. In its first year,
65,000 copies were distributed covering
issues from sexual health to mental health.
Many local celebrities were interviewed too,
including Russell T Davies, Denise Black and
Julie Hesmondhalgh.
2001
After a year of publication, issue seven
of Out In Greater Manchester saw our
community magazine grow in page count
and distribution as we rebranded and
relaunched the magazine in full colour and
increased volunteer involvement. Out was
instrumental in providing information about
the syphilis epidemic in Manchester, as part
of the Spreads Easily campaign, and reader
feedback was overwhelmingly positive.
Also this year we came runner-up in the
Best Graphic Design category at the 2000
Charity and Not For Profit Organisation
Publishing Awards in London.
2002
Further cementing our slight obsession with
Big Brother - gay housemate Josh Rafter
came to the office to share his experience
of life in the Big Brother house, and to tell
us about the launch of his LGB&T housing
agency. This year also saw Out In Greater
Manchester feature it’s first cover mounted
free gift, in the shape of an expanding “bum
sponge”. Don’t ask. The Commonwealth
Games in Manchester saw the magazine
feature a double cover launching the LGF’s
flyposting campaign in the city. Later in the
year we spoke to Paul O’Grady. We also
published the official guide to Manchester
Lesbian & Gay Mardi Gras.
2003
A year of huge and significant change to our
community magazine saw the title change
to outnorthwest, our distribution increase
three fold and reach across the north west
of England, and a page count increase
ONW editor Grahame Robertson looks back on
14 years of the magazine.
from 24 pages to 64. Content was also
expanded to include lifestyle and culture
sections, with regular columns from a large
number of volunteers. The revamp was
timed to coincide with EuroPride, and not
only did we produce a 64 page magazine,
but the team also turned around a 56 page
EuroPride guide at the same time, too.
Delivery of 15,000 copies of outnorthwest
and 10,000 EuroPride guides took its toll on
Unity House, with the floor collapsing under
the weight of all these resources!
2004
In 2004 our news team began supplying
LGB&T news from the North West to The
Pink Paper. During the year, outnorthwest
covered a huge range of issues, including
40 years of LGB&T campaigning, civil
partnerships, mental health, older LGB&T
people, and the return to television of
another one of our (OK, Grahame’s)
obsessions... Doctor Who! Our World AIDS
Day issue highlighted the fact that over
3,000 people knew they were living with
HIV in the North West; and potentially many,
many more didn’t...
24 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
2005
outnorthwest reaches a milestone this year,
publishing it’s 50th edition and celebrated
with a relaunch and redesign. Throughout
the year, outnorthwest was also an
important media sponsor for events such
as Manchester Pride, queerupnorth, The Big
Gay Read and Homotopia in Liverpool. Big
name interviews this year included Antony
Cotton, who told us, “I’ve never done an
interview for Gay Times since I started this
job (on Coronation Street). I’m astounded
by that.” outnorthwest was proud to have
Antony as our cover star for our 51st issue.
Even if we did spell his name wrongly on the
cover! Sorry Antony!
2006
The year started with an exclusive
interview with entertainer John Barrowman
who teased readers with the upcoming
Doctor Who spin-off, Torchwood - and
shared his experience of being gay in the
entertainment industry. Our special World
AIDS Day edition marked 25 years of HIV
and looked back at a quarter of a century of
HIV prevention campaigns.
is now “the gayest show on television!”
Interviews with Sophie & Sian, Antony
Cotton, Phil Colinson and show creator
Tony Warren only went to prove our point!
2011 also saw the magazine undertake its
final redesign, with a bold new layout that
we’ve stuck with until today! This year was
also tinged with sadness as we spoke to
Rogert Crouch about the terrible loss of his
son Dominic. We were honoured to spend
the day with Roger, who spoke with such
deep love about his son. Sadly, only a few
months later we were also to lose Roger.
2012
2007
Another unique feature in outnorthwest,
saw us asking our readers if they would
ever take a pill that would turn them straight.
We received hundreds of responses, and,
perhaps unsurprisingly, the huge majory
(92% to be precise) of our readers said they
wouldn’t. “Butch, skinhead, wife-beating
pint drinkers?”, outnorthwest ended the
year with a hard-hitting feature on lesbian
stereotypes. “If we carry on using lesbian
stereotypes in our own community, why
should we expect straight people not to?”,
noted one reader.
2008
We asked if lesbians and gay men really
do get on, or if there was a War Of The
Sexualities. The feature provoked one
of the biggest reader responses in the
magazine’s history. Manchester’s Director
of Public Health, Sally Bradley also spoke
to outnorthwest this year in a landmark
interview. In it she made clear how serious
the health of the LGB community was being
taken and what steps were being taken to
ensure vital health messages were being
targeted to our communities. We ended the
calendar year with a major interview with
LGF patron Russell T Davies (read Russell’s
messag to ONW readers overleaf!). This
issue picked up more national publicity than
any other issue of outnorthwest.
2009
June 2009 saw outnorthwest face the
biggest challenge of its almost ten years of
publication when the LGF was faced with
the difficult reality of a decline in advertising
opportunities. Rather than give up and call it
a day, the magazine regrouped, refocussed
and relaunched as a bi-monthly publication.
The relaunch issue reunited the cast, crew
and creators of Queer As Folk as we looked
back on a phenomenon that in many
ways defined queer life in Manchester.
As the year progressed we also spoke to
Manchester Pride’s Jackie Crozier, North
West musical legend Holly Johnson, Christine
Burns, and comedian Stephen K Amos.
2010
October see’s outnorthwest reach its
landmark 100th issue. We also mark the
launch of The LGF’s international antihomophobia campaign ‘Enough Is Enough’,
highlgihting all the creative ways our readers
have been promoting the campaign. Some
of the team were also lucky enough to
travel to London and meet LGF patron Sir Ian
McKellen, who kindly lent his voice to the
campaign video.
2011
outnorthwest starts the year with a visit
to cobbles of Coronation Street, as we
boldly state on our cover that the show
outnorthwest starts the year with a
reminder of the importance of HIV testing
- a message we’ve firmly been behind
throughout the last 14 years. We also
spoke to writer Jonathan Harvey about the
resurrection of his classic ‘Beautiful Thing’.
Later in the year, as The Bingham Cup came
to Manchester, we were again honoured to
speak with the Alice Hoagland, mother of
Mark Bingham, who died tragically during
the events of 9/11.
2013
2013 and outnorthwest throws its weight
behind The LGF’s equal marriage campaign.
Due to the hard work and determination of
our communities, we were all thrilled when
the Marriage (Same Sex Couples) Bill was
passed unanimously. We’d never have
thought back in 2000 when we started the
magazine that such a landmark on the road
to equalty would be reached. A real highlight
of 2013 was speaking to Amal Fashanu
who spoke with passion about the death of
her uncle Justin Fashanu and her campaign
to rid the terraces of homophobia.
2014
So here we are in 2014, and outnorthwest
celebrates winning The Co-op Repect
Loved By You Award for Best Regional LGBT
Magazine. For us, it was a real validation
of everything we’ve tried to do with the
magazine. And the fact that it was voted
for by the community made the award all
the more sweeter. They always say you
should go out on a high! So, 14 years and
121 issues later, ONW is no more. It’s been
an honour to bring you this magazine, and
I speak on behalf of everyone who has
helped produce ONW when I say we’ll miss
you. Thank you for picking us up!
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 25
GOODBYE ONW
TV supremo, and LGF
Patron Russell T Davies
has been a supporter
of ONW since Issue 1.
He was the first person
we ever interviewed.
We asked Russell
to round off 14 years
and 121 issues with a
special message for
our readers...
“I’m very sad to hear that this is
the last issue of outnorthwest.
I’ll miss it! Maybe it’s more of an
online world now, but let me tell
you young ‘uns, in days gone by,
magazines like this were all we had.
A helping hand. A light in the dark.
A valuable resource. The only place
you could get the vital information
you needed, sometimes, these
pages could actually be lifesavers.
And most of all, it was a great big
laugh!
A MESSAGE FROM
RUSSELL T DAVIES
TO THE READERS OF
OUTNORTHWEST
26 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
I’d like to say thanks to Grahame
and his dedicated teams over the
years, who’ve put so much love
and imagination into these pages.
Job well done, boys and girls! And
happy memories indeed. Now go
and get some rest, you deserve it.”
WOMEN
It seems like a lot is written
about ‘visibility’. We often hear
that certain groups of people
are invisible in society or in
public life or in the media: LGB
people, women, those aged
over 50…
Edie
Alice
But some of the women we look up to
the most, some of the public figures who
have inspired and continue to inspire us,
are older lesbian or bisexual women.
These are the women we look at and
think ‘I want to be like her…’ So for this
issue of OutNorthWest, in which we’re
celebrating older LGB people, we wanted
to celebrate just a few of these amazing
women.
SANDI TOKSVIG
Although she is now routinely
described as a ‘national treasure’,
public appreciation wasn’t always so
forthcoming for writer, comedian, TV and
radio presenter Sandi Toksvig. When she
came out as lesbian in the early 1990s,
and revealed that she was co-parenting
three children born through artificial
insemination to her then-partner Peta
Stewart, she was dropped as compere
for the Save The Children charity’s gala
event, causing controversy and a media
storm. Writing about growing up with no
gay role models, Sandi said: “I believe
secrets are a cancer of the soul and
prefer to live out and proud with my head
held high. However, in order to do so,
everyone, whatever the path they walk in
life, needs inspirational figures.” We’re so
pleased that Sandi herself is now one of
those role models.
ALICE WALKER
Alice Walker is perhaps best known
for her best-selling novel ‘The Color
Purple’, which featured a touching love
affair between two women and was
subsequently made into film starring
Whoopi Goldberg and Oprah Winfrey,
Sandi
but she has also published many other
novels, poetry collections, short stories
and non-fiction. As well as being a
renowned author, Walker has been an
activist all her adult life, speaking out
repeatedly on human rights issues. In the
poem Be Nobody’s Darling, Walker wrote:
“Be an outcast./Take the contradictions/
Of your life/And wrap around/You like
a shawl,/To parry stones/To keep you
warm.”
EDIE WINDSOR
Whilst Edie Windsor didn’t quite singlehandedly achieve marriage equality
in the USA, she wasn’t far off. The
octogenarian met her partner Thea
Spyer in the 1960s and the couple built
a life together for over forty years, finally
getting legally married in Canada in
2007. After Thea’s death in 2009, Edie
was not only devastated by the loss of
her life partner but also shocked to learn
that, because their marriage was not
recognised by US federal law, she would
have to pay $363,000 inheritance tax on
their shared assets. Edie decided to fight
this inequality and took her case all the
way to the US Supreme Court, who ruled
last year that hers and Thea’s marriage
(and by extension the legal marriages of
thousands of other same-sex couples)
should be recognised under US Federal
Law.
Talking about her decision to challenge
the law, Edie said, “We didn’t expect
marriage, even 10 years ago, and I
never expected I’d be looking at a piece
of paper that said ‘Windsor versus
the United States of America.’ We
spend our lives coming out, in different
circumstances. We’re never all out,
somehow. It takes a lot of guts to stand
up and let people know - people you’ve
lied to much of your life - that not only
are you a lesbian, but you’re a lesbian
fighting the United States of America.”
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 27
OLDER LGB PEOPLE
OUT IN
THE CITY!
OLDER
AND OUT!
First of all a big thank you to
Grahame for letting me take over
t
this special edition of outnorthwes
T
LGB
r
olde
the
on
ses
which focu
population.
Recent studies show that there are
xual
about one million lesbian, gay, bise
the
over
and transgender people
age of 55 in the UK, and yet visibility
is still an issue. Many older LGBT
d
people, some of who were subjecte
s
1960
the
in
apy’
ther
ion
to ‘convers
and 70s, are still afraid to be ‘out’ for
fear of prejudice. In 2004 Age Concern
Manchester, seeing the need to raise
Out
visibility and awareness, set up the
al
soci
the
t
mee
in The City group to
a
needs of over 50s LGBT by providing
d
coul
ple
peo
ded
min
like
re
space whe
the
in
Out
on
s
year
ten
rly
meet. Nea
City has grown and strengthened and
p
now consists of a richly diverse grou
of
bers
mem
of around 40 people. The
Out in the City have a positive outlook
on life and are always keen to involve
themselves in projects and events.
The group takes part in the Pride
parade every year and enjoy the build
in
up and preparation that takes place
the preceding weeks.
Sue
THE CIT Y write for ONW
Peter and Sheila from OUT IN activities...
about the groups
“HOW OFTEN DO WE HEAR THE
PHRASE “USE IT OR LOSE IT”?
As we grow older we realise only too
it is
well that - cliche though it may be y
enjo
we
ren
child
As
true.
dly
undoubte
tive
crea
and
on
inati
imag
our
using
t
impulses freely and naturally but as adul
sure
pres
s,
life takes over, with all its stres
can
and sheer hard work, these faculties
In
n.
dow
d
pene
dam
too easily become
and
this
e
gnis
reco
we
“Out in the City”
,
as retirement provides us with the time
to
s
nitie
ortu
opp
y
man
us
s
give
p
the grou
s.
selve
rediscover our critical and creative
a
up
set
During the last few years we have
ked
wor
have
Reading Group and members
cts
with all the local Art Galleries on proje
often
and
ng
ulati
which have been stim
resulting in a display in the Gallery. We
have published a book of our memories
ct
and recollections and the latest proje
ry
Histo
les
Peop
the
at
ance
orm
perf
a
was
a
of
trial
Museum which looked at the
We
group of homosexual men in 1936.
too,
ents
mom
al
have our purely recreation
itely
defin
is
It”
Lose
or
it
of course, but “Use
into
h
marc
we
as
er
bann
our
the slogan on
City
The
In
Out
–
r
Pete
.”
the Third Age
“MANCHESTER IS RENOWNED FOR
BS IN
THE VARIETY OF BARS AND CLU
ER
OLD
E
THE GAY VILLAGE BUT SOM
Y
AWA
SE
IALI
PEOPLE PREFER TO SOC
’.
FROM THE ‘SCENE
and
Some older gay, lesbian, bisexual
seen
be
to tant
reluc
are
trans people
icly
in gay bars as they may not be publ
out
only
or
,
ality
sexu
their
ut
out abo
ral
to a few people. For others the gene
not
s
doe
atmosphere of gay venues
appeal.
For those who prefer a more relaxed
atmosphere there is an alternative,
In
right in the centre of Manchester. Out
p
grou
ort
supp
and
al
soci
a
is
City
The
for older gay, lesbian, bisexual and
transgendered people . They hold an
pm
informal drop-in every Wednesday,1
nt
Mou
se,
Hou
tish
til 4pm, at London Scot
l.)
Hote
land
Mid
the
Street, ( opposite
play
Some people paint or draw, others
y
man
in
join
and
sit
t
mos
on the Wii,
lively conversations and plan future
n
activities. Tea and coffee (and ofte
.”
lable
homemade cakes!) are avai
Sheila Carson - Out In The City
ing-well/out-in-the-city.html
http://silverservice.org.uk/age
28 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
Archive images of The Rembrandt and New York New York courtesy of Manchester Libraries
SUE NZILANI from Out
In The City writes for
ONW
Q&A
We asked some
older LGB people
what the best
thing about being
older is...
BLOOMERS
MARTIN WELLS
What’s the best thing about getting older? I’ve got loads of useful experiences and
wisdom I can use to do many more things, with passion and without fear. What one thing
would you tell your younger self? Develop the skill and practice of being mindful – do
not regret growing older; it’s a privilege denied to many! What one thing would you like
to see changed for older LGB&T people? Wake-up don’t think you’re old its (almost) all
going on in your head!
PETER - OUT IN THE CITY
What’s the best thing about getting older? You develop more knowledge or become more wiser as you get older.
What one thing would you tell your younger self?
Don’t start smoking, it burns a hole in your pocket. What one
thing would you like to see changed for older LGB&T
people? The stigma attached to older people, you have an
age tag on you which is wrong.
ROSIE ADAMSON-CLARK
What’s the best thing about getting older? not worrying about what others think too
much and having to follow the mass, plus the freedoms that come with age and experience...
it’s all good really! What one thing would you tell your younger self? Enjoy it all, be who
you want to be, love who you want to love, know you are wonderful, life is a gift. What one
thing would you like to see changed for older LGB&T people? I think that once a person has reached 45...they seem to slip off the radar, and are often not considered important,
unique, sexual/sexy or special. I wish the whole of society, fashion, health social care, was not
so youth focussed. There has to be a place in society for the older, wiser, men and women to
contribute, we all have gifts, let’s celebrate the vintage and previous in everything!
Ending Homophobia,
Empowering People
www.lgf.org.uk
Registered Charity No.1070904
e
You can find out more about th
y
services that The Lesbian & Ga
ople
Foundation offers older LGB pe
, or
by calling us on 0845 3 30 30 30
visiting our website at
www.lgf.org.uk
Now that the days and nights are
getting brighter, it’s time to get out
and socialise more, and our older
womens’ group may be just the
thing for you…
The group is held every 1st and 3rd Tuesday
of the month, from 1pm to 3pm, in the LGF’s
comfy group room, and although we call it
an ‘older womens’’ group, we welcome all
women who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual
or questioning. The group has been going
almost a year now, and we have welcomed
a lot of women of all ages and backgrounds.
A strong focus for the group is friendship
and laughter, and no matter who is there,
we always end up laughing and sharing
our experiences, and the group is really
welcoming for people who are unsure or
nervous about coming along. We have had
workshops around positive thinking in the
past, as well as discussions about ageing,
and the barriers older people can often face.
Most sessions are really informal, but on
occasion we may have a specific speaker in,
or activity to do. We also are really keen on
asking group members what they want to
do, and are always looking for ideas. Maybe
you have a skill you would like to teach the
group? Or have seen a good film that we
could watch? Maybe you’re an expert on IT
and want to pass on your skills to others?
The group is facilitated by volunteer Sara,
and Kate, the Wellbeing Officer, and both will
answer your queries and questions, they will
also supply you with copious amounts of tea
and biscuits, which is of course, a priority! It’s
also a really good group to get information
about what other events are out there for
lesbian, gay and bisexual women.
There’s no need to book either, you can just
turn up, tell the reception you are hear for
‘Bloomers’, and get the lift (or the stairs if you
don’t like lifts!) up to the group room.
For more information, please contact
[email protected] or phone
0845 3 30 30 30
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 29
WELLBEING
THANK YOU FOR BEING
By Kate Jopling
We all feel lonely sometimes. It’s
that aching feeling we get when
we need human contact. It’s an
entirely subjective experience: I
can’t know how lonely you are,
and you can’t tell if I’m lonely,
unless I tell you. But whilst it
may be a personal experience,
it undoubtedly needs a collective
and community wide response,
because as the evidence
increasingly shows us, loneliness
can be a serious risk to our
health.
The Campaign to End Loneliness works
to highlight the health impacts that
loneliness can have, to persuade people
to take it seriously, and to improve the
services on offer to help support lonely
people. We know that feeling lonely is
linked to a wide number of physical and
mental health issues, including depression,
cognitive decline, early onset dementia and
cardiovascular disease.
In fact, studies have shown that loneliness
has twice the effect on your chance of
an early death as obesity. The effect of
loneliness and isolation on mortality has
been equated to that of smoking 15
cigarettes a day.
There are many risk factors that can
increase a person’s chances of feeling
lonely. The biggest is age. We are most
LONELINESS
A HIDDEN
HEALTH
RISK
likely to be lonely in our late teens and early
twenties and in our later life - 10 per cent
of those over the age of 65 say they feel
lonely often or all of the time.
There is also evidence to suggest that
lesbian, gay and bisexual adults are
more likely than heterosexual people to
experience loneliness. A 2012 Stonewall
study found older LGB adults are more likely
to live on their own, not have a partner,
and have less contact with family and
smaller social networks.
The picture sounds bleak, but there is a
great deal we can do to mitigate loneliness
and support those at risk. We need to
encourage people to plan not only for their
30 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
financial retirement, but also their social
networks in later life. We also need to be
sensitive to how people can become lonely
and put support systems in place to help
people maintain meaningful relationships
and initiate new ones as we age.
The Campaign to End Loneliness is a
national organisation working through a
network of national, regional and local
organisations and individuals to tackle
loneliness by supporting the development
of improved services and support for older
people.
Find out more and become
a supporter at www.
campaigntoendloneliness.org
LGF GROUPS
Ending Homophobia,
Empowering People
www.lgf.org.uk
Registered Charity No.1070904
Continuing
our look at
the support
groups
offered by
The LGF.
For the Older Peoples’ Edition
of Out Northwest, we posed
a number of questions to the
members of our Older & Bolder
group about the advantages
and disadvantages of growing
older…
What’s the best thing about
growing older?
• “Growing older and wider to me is
less stress”
• “You learn from past mistakes”
• “The best thing about growing
older is that you have seen and
done most things in life so you
tend to be less stressful and less
opinionated. Life is more wholesome
and slower, not in a sad way but in
a balanced way. I don’t seem to feel
as offended or shocked at anything
life is more balanced and truly has
a quality about it which I never
experienced when I was younger.
Little things like going to the coast
on a sunny day or going to the local
gay pub seem to excite me in the
same way that going abroad did
when I was much younger. Staying
in on a winters night reading a book
definitely now appeals, but five-ten
years ago I would have been “out’. I
look more for the beauty in life and
not the ugly.”
What becomes more difficult with
age?
• “Meeting Mr Right!”
• “Physical Health and continuing
to live independently in our own
homes”
• “Lack of services which enable older
people to access support”
What one thing would you say to
someone thinking about coming to
Older & Bolder?
• “It’s a chance to meet people who
are gay, and a chance to share your
ideas, experiences and worries.”
• “I would suggest for definite that
anyone comes to Older and Bolder
as the space is so friendly and the
staff are very approachable. It is a
great space to meet new friends
and also to learn about what is
happening in the gay world. The
topics that are covered are also
beneficial, you can learn about all
sorts of things from how to ice a cup
cake to how to create a green space.
It’s a great place to relax, and meet
people of the same age.”
Older & Bolder group is held on the
2nd and the 4th Thursday of the
month, 7.30pm to 9pm. No need
to book. For information on what is
going on in the group, please go to
www.lgf.org.uk/whats-on/
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 31
GAY MEN’S HEALTH
THE
GREAT SEX
DEBATE
So, what makes good sex? We
posed this question to guys
online and ventured out into
Manchester’s Gay Village to ask
it too and this is what the guys
we asked told us:
With a nice, decent person • Right partner •
Reciprocation • Mutual attraction • Passion •
With a person you’re in love with • With your
partner • Good connection • Consensual
• Being versatile • Returning the favour •
Being fucked • Foreplay • Oral and playing
• Cuddles • Physical intimacy • Honesty •
Rimming & bareback • A good kiss • Oral
sex • Snowballing • Safe sex • Massages •
Big penis
Photos: Ian Wallis www.ianwallisphotography.co.uk
That’s quite a range of answers and shows
the real variety of what guys think makes
sex good. Armed with the answers we hot
footed it to ‘The Great Sex Debate’ at The
LGF where they were hosting this event for
The Manchester Condom Partnership. We’d
invited gay and bisexual men from far and
wide to join us in a mass debate about sex
and all things sexual health and we even had
a finger buffet!
We had a panel of experts on the night
including; Pete Smith(Senior Manager Health
and Wellbeing - Manchester Public Health
Development Service), who chaired the
debate; Rob Cookson (Director of Business
Development and Sexual Health Strategic
Lead – The Lesbian & Gay Foundation);
Dr Adam Bourne (Lecturer - Sigma Research);
Dr Matt Phillips (SpR GU Medicine Manchester Centre for Sexual Health);
and Jakeb Braden (Life Coach and ONW
Columnist on gay men’s issues).
The panellists were asked to prepare
answers to a number of questions ahead of
the event to stimulate discussion:
• What makes great sex for gay and
bisexual men?
• What stops great sex from happening?
• What makes a great sexual health
message?
STACEY ADAMS reports back from The LGF’s Great Sex Debate,
which asked “What makes great sex?”
•
•
Do scare tactics work in sexual health
campaigns?
What do we need to do to enable MSM
to have the sex they want safely?
As you can imagine we had a lot to discuss
and the questions generated some really
interesting feedback. So, what did men say
in response to these questions? Well, are
you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin. We
discussed that ‘sex’ means very different
things to people, some people might define
sex as penetration (anal or oral) and some
people define it as everything from kissing
and foreplay through to orgasm (with or
without penetration). With this array of
definitions we discussed the importance
of intimacy and communication and, shock
horror, relationships! Some of the men
felt that gay and bisexual men are rarely
portrayed as being in loving relationships
and that more work needs to be done to
address the wondrous diversity of gay and
bisexual men, one size certainly does not fit
all! We talked about how drugs and alcohol
32 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
can stop great sex from happening but also
how for some men they may be seen as
necessary to increase pleasure or give them
the courage that they feel they haven’t got
without. We talked about the need for more
open and honest discussions about sex and
sexual health and the need for compulsory
sex and relationships education in schools.
We discussed that great sexual health
messages need to be fun and cheeky and
not doom and gloom, that scare tactics don’t
work and that for men to be empowered
to have great sex they need to have
confidence.
All in all it was a fantastic event and I don’t
have the space here to detail all of what
was discussed on the night, I just wanted to
tantalise you with a tasty titbit! If you have
any thoughts on the questions asked that
you’d like to share then email us at: [email protected]
org.uk for information about sex and sexual
health visit our website: www.lgf.org.uk/
men or you can call our helpline on: 0845
3 30 30 30
FIND OUT WHERE YOU
CAN GET TESTED BY VISITING
www.lgf.org.uk/testing
OPINION JAKEB ARTURIO BRADEN
OLDER &
SHIGELLA BOLDER
Shigella! And no we’re not
talking about the famous
chef we all know and love.
We’re talking about a bacterial
infection that is caused by the
bacteria found in poo. It can
be very easily spread as all it
takes if for a tiny amount of
the bacteria to get into your
mouth.
GASP! So why are we telling you about this?
Because Gay and Bisexual men are most at
risk of Shigella through sexual activities such
as rimming, licking the area which could have
the bacteria on it such as the bum, groin
area or even the penis.
What should you do if you suspect you may
have Shigella? Simple! If you are showing
symptoms you should go to your doctor or
your local GUM as soon as possible. A list of
clinics in Greater Manchester can be found
here: www.lgf.org.uk/testing
You should explain your symptoms and tell
the health care professional who is treating
you that you might have got it from sex. This
is important so that they can run the right
tests and suggest the right treatment path
for you.
There are ways you can minimise the risk of
you coming into contact with Shigella;
Love Anal? Wear condoms – this is the best
way of reducing your risk not only against
Shigella but against all STI’s.
•
•
ARE YOU TOPPING? Wash your
penis with warm soapy water before
and after, be mindful when washing
the corona (the head of your penis) as
that’s where most bacteria accumulate.
And don’t forget to dab dry with a clean
towel after washing.
BOTTOMING? Be sure to have a
bath/shower beforehand as a good
way of eliminating any odours and
keeping your bum nice and clean!
Prefer to douche? Be careful not to use
hot water or to over douche as this
can damage the lining in your arse
which increases the likelihood of HIV
transmission.
Well being 45 in a few short
weeks, I can’t help but wonder at
my own journey as a gay man,
my own involvement with Equality
and Gay Men’s work, I feel proud
to have been involved with some
great projects and organisations
supporting gay men not just
equality wise but also with
resects to HIV and Sexual health
as well.
However I joined the ranks relatively later
in the 1990s. Coming out as gay in the
1960’s, 1970s, 1980s and 1990s was no
easy prospect. Levels of homophobia and
discrimination were so much higher at that
time (remember there were NO LAWS offering
protection).
We perhaps need to remember as well the
contribution that these men have made to
our lives, the ones who were are gay at
time when society deemed it to be wrong
the ones who first stood up and marched
when the police were very hostile to gay
community.
I can remember even in the early nineties
the police at Gay Pride Marches were far
from happy to be there and the institutional
homophobia that was present in the police
force at the time was more than obvious.
These were the men that fought for gay
rights and fought for better HIV treatments. It
was Gay men that got off their arses and did
something about HIV and AIDS the Terrence
Higgins Trust was created by a group of
gay men (friend of Terry, who was the first
“Official gay men to die of an AIDS related
illness.) Even though the Tory Government at
the time was deeply homophobic looked to
gay men to lead the way in HIV prevention,
and they did despite growing public fear over
HIV and Gay Men being vilified as a result.
Why am I saying this well I feel that as a Gay
and Bisexual male community that perhaps
we need to reflect on that, at a time now
when we have achieved almost full equality,
yes there are still some issues outstanding
and homophobia is still present in our society
“Lets not write
each other
off because
of our age
too soon.
Remember
that we all
have a story
to tell and our
own journeys.”
we owe a huge amount of gratitude to our
gay and bi brothers who were at the leading
edge of this. So lets not write each other off
because of our age too soon. Remember
that we all have a story to tell and our own
journeys.
With ONW coming to an end, you can still
catch me online. You can find me here:
www.twitter.com/authenticgayblg
www.youtube.com/user/NorthernFella
www.theauthenticgayblog.wordpress.com/
Thanks!
Jakeb
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 33
WELLBEING
G
N
I
L
E
E
F
E
H
T
T
A
HE
THANK YOU FOR BEING
There’s been a lot
of talk in the press
recently about
the value of men’s
saunas and whether
they still have a
relevant place in
today’s society.
When I say men’s
saunas, I’m talking
about a member’s
club which guys can
go to if they are
looking for sex with
other men… just to
make that clear!
Martin Cooper reports.
There have been calls recently
from some high profile players
in the UK gay scene to close
down these establishments,
claiming they are unsanitary and
give the gay and bisexual men’s
community a bad name.
Some recent individual cases have only
helped to stoke the fires and many people
have consequently supported these calls,
as they feel there is no need for them to
still operate in a society where same sex
relationships are easier to find than ever
with gay venues, societies and online apps
becoming more and more prevalent.
I decided it was a good opportunity to take
time to visit one of the Manchester saunas
and chat to some of the guys who were
there to get the other side of the story. I
was lucky to chat to two lads, both in their
20’s, who had never been to a sauna
34 OUTNORTHWEST Support the work of the LGF. Donate online today at www.lgf.org.uk
before and they were really surprised by
what they found. “It’s actually really nicely
decorated and it’s just like you’d imagine a
spa to be”.
But what was their preconception? What
were they expecting? “I’m not sure really.
I guess I just thought it would be lots of
people taking drugs, or full of people who
couldn’t get laid who were desperate for
sex! I just thought it would be much seedier
than this.”
I found it quite interesting how their
perceptions had dramatically changed
since entering the establishment. It has
to be said that they weren’t there for
sex and they were using one of the LGF’s
Outreach Clinics, but nevertheless their
preconceptions had been challenged and
their opinions on saunas, their users and
their role in the modern gay society had
been changed.
I guess what I’m saying is, unless we’ve
WELLBEING
Scan the QR code with
your phone to watch our
LGF Quickie video on
staying safe in saunas!
experienced something first hand I’m not
sure if there is a strong case to call for its
dismissal, as long as it’s consensual and
legal. In my experience the saunas take
the duty they have to their service users
very seriously, and while homophobia and
stigma still exists in our society, there will
always be a need for public
sex environments and ‘gentlemen’s
clubs’ for people to achieve their sexual
needs.
I think it’s better that this is done in an
atmosphere which is secure and safe with
access to information on sexual health and
condoms than in a potentially risky area
outdoors… but aren’t they a hotbed for STIs
and HIV transmissions I hear some of you
cry?
It’s impossible for a building to have HIV.
The people who use the services there
may be putting themselves at more
potential risk, but if they are educated on
the benefits of condom use and know they
can access them for free while they are
there, they have opportunity to stay as
safe as they possibly can.
Our role, in my eyes, should be to support
the great work that the saunas do in
offering a service which is clearly desired
by their audience. We should work closely
in providing good sexual health advice
to their members and take advantage
of opportunities to provide interventions,
testing and resource distribution. Simply
closing them down would only create more
problems for a community of men who rely
on saunas to achieve their sexual goals.
Ending Homophobia,
Empowering People
www.lgf.org.uk
Registered
Charity
No.1070904
This may
be the
final
issue of outnorthwest,
but you can still get
all the sexual health
information you need
from our website,
every single day.
Visit www.lgf.org.
uk/men And don’t
forget to subscribe to
our YouTube channel
to catch up with
our monthly Quickie
videos! Just search
for ‘LGF Online’
23
www.lgf.org.uk OUTNORTHWEST 35
GIVING SOMETHING BACK
!
D
E
V
L
O
V
N
I
GET
Ending Homophobia,
Empowering People
www.lgf.org.uk
Registered Charity No.1070904
PLEASE
SAY
“I DO!”
It’s nearly ‘Wedding Season’
and here at The LGF we’re all
getting excited and waiting
for the wedding invitations
to start dropping through
the door – don’t let us down!
Debbie
BE THE
SOLUTION!
Coming to the end of our
Financial Year means that
as an organisation we
have to take a careful look
at what services will be
re-funded next year and
what, if anything, will have
to be reduced or worst
case scenario stopped
all together. It’s a horrid
thought that an LGB person
relying on one of our life
saving / life changing
services may not be able
to access this service next
year due to funding cuts
but one, we unfortunately,
have to take very seriously.
work
So what’s the solution? We want to
more
and
hier
healt
r,
safe
a
te
crea
to
with you
with
g
Alon
le.
peop
LGB
all
for
d
worl
l
equa
lar
the knowledge that your one off or regu
the
to
rence
diffe
real
a
donation is making
ting in
lives of LGB people you’ll also be inves
vital
be
will
our work to develop services that
r.
to us all as we grow olde
ices save
Our befriending and counselling serv
re we
lives, it’s that simple, we want to ensu
yone
ever
for
there
can expand on this and be
e.
futur
the
in
and
now
who needs our help,
d
What’s our dream? Our dream is a worl
,
past
the
of
where homophobia is a thing
ual
Bisex
and
Man
Gay
ian,
where every Lesb
t
wan
they
life
the
live
to
free
person is
Hate
without fear of being the victim of a
ity,
mun
com
LGB
Crime. We empower the
lity.
equa
oting
prom
and
ls
supporting individua
to
e
com
to
s
year
in
here
be
to
t
We wan
. Please
continue to assist LGB people in crisis
m……
help us achieve our drea
our
Giving even a small amount through
means
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