How to Write an Effective Introductory Paragraph

How to Write an Effective Introductory Paragraph
Remedial Lesson for 9th graders who Failed EOC Writing Exam
Designed By: Sarah Pettus
Background
As per the Texas Education Agency the emphasis in grading the two essays students must write for the EOC English I will be placed
on their ability to “state a clear thesis” and “organize and develop their writing.” Students who received less than satisfactory scores
on their writing were often docked points for “meaningless introductions and conclusions” and a “weak, evolving, or nonexistent
thesis statement” (TCTELA2012- STAAR English, 2012).
Overview
This instructional unit is created specifically for 9th grade writing students who have failed to achieve the satisfactory mark on the TX
End of Course writing exam for English 1. I teach at a small charter school in southeast Dallas called A+ Academy, part of Rylie Family
Faith Academies. The school is a Title I campus with 99% of the students that qualify for free lunches. The campus was recently rated
by US News & World Report as one of the leading high schools in the nation. We have a 100% graduation rate and 80% of our
students continue their secondary education.
The STAAR test and End of course exams have been recently implemented in Texas to replace the TAKS test. The EOC exam
determines if students will receive credit for their English I course and their score is added with their other high school classes to
determine their eligibility to graduate. The EOC score will also 15% of the students final grade ("Commissioner defers 15%," 2012).
This year we have a total of 45 students who may have passed the EOC with the minimum score but, failed to meet the satisfactory
mark. These students often received these marks due to the lack of depth and interest in their essays. They lack the technical skills
to engage a reader from the first line of their paragraph as well as to construct an effective thesis statement.
Overarching Instructional Goal
9th grade English I remedial students will be able to construct an effective introductory paragraph with an attention grabbing first
sentence, a clear concise thesis statement, and two or three supporting sentences.
Specific Goal
After completing this lesson, students will be able to write an introductory paragraph that captures and holds the reader’s attention,
includes a thesis statement, and includes two to three supporting sentences.
The Intended Audience
This instructional unit is aimed specifically at 9th grade writing students who did not achieve the state satisfactory score. These
students are computer literate and can learn independently. However, this lesson could also be adapted for whole group instruction.
Resources
Commissioner defers 15% grading policy for one year. (2012, February 17). Texas Education Agency News. Retrieved from
http://www.tea.state.tx.us/news_release.aspx?id=2147505536
TCTELA2012- STAAR English. (2012). Retrieved from
www.tea.state.tx.us/WorkArea/linkit.aspx?LinkIdentifier=id&ItemID=2147505301&libID=2147505295
CN = Condition B = Behavior CR = Criteria
Instructional Goal
9th grade English I remedial
students will construct an effective
introductory paragraph with an
attention grabbing first sentence, a
clear concise thesis statement, and
two or three supporting sentences.
Instructional Goal with Performance Context
Using provided prompt (CN) student will write an
introductory paragraph (B), which grabs the reader’s
attention, contains a thesis statement, and
supporting sentences (CR).
Steps in Instructional Goal
Students will identify 5 strategies
for attention grabbing sentences.
Performance Objectives
When presented with a list of strategies (CN)
students will identify 5 attention grabbing strategies
for a first sentence (B) without error (CR).
Using knowledge of 5 strategies for attention
grabbing sentences (CN) students will identify
appropriate strategy (B) for a literary as well as an
expository essay prompt (CR).
Using knowledge of 5 strategies for attention
grabbing sentences (CN) students will identify
appropriate strategy and compose an attention
grabbing sentence (B) for a literary as well as an
expository essay prompt (CR).
When presented with an already composed thesis
statement (CN) student will identify each component
i.e. topic, claim, & supporting points (B) without error
(CR).
Using knowledge of thesis components (CN) students
will create a thesis statement (B) for EOC writing
prompt that includes topic, claim, and supporting
points (CR).
Students will identify appropriate
strategy for 1st sentence of
introductory paragraph.
Students will construct attention
grabbing sentence.
Students will identify 3
components of a thesis statement:
topic, claim, & supporting points.
Students will compose thesis
statement which will be the last
sentence of the introductory
paragraph.
Assessment
Students will be given two released
EOC writing prompts. They will then
have to write introductory paragraphs
that include an attention grabber,
thesis statement, and two or three
supporting sentences. They will also
have multiple choice questions as part
of the assessment.
Assessment
Multiple Choice questions over 5
strategies.
From written paragraph: Does
student select appropriate attention
grabbing strategy for the type of
essay?
From written paragraph: Does
student correctly use an attention
grabbing strategy to start
introductory paragraph?
Multiple Choice Questions: Can
student list and define each part of a
thesis statement?
From written paragraph: Does
student incorporate all three
components into their thesis
statement?
Be familiar with 5
types of attention
grabbing sentences
Determine which types
are most appropriate
for a literary and
expository essay
Familiarity with 3 parts
of a thesis statement
Determine topic
Determine claim
Choose appropriate
strategy
Compose an attention
grabbing sentence
Compose introductory paragraph with attention grabber as 1st sentence and thesis
statement as last sentence.
Determine 3 supporting
points for claim
Compose thesis
statement including all
3 components (topic,
claim, supporting
points)
Pre-instructional Activities
Remedial students often struggle with confidence in their own academic abilities. They have been discouraged by the state tests, as well as
sometimes teachers, parents, and peers. Their lack of confidence serves as their first barrier to success and motivation to learn. In order to
assure students they do know some of the basics of the writing process students will be presented with a simple questionnaire to activate prior
knowledge (Appendix I). They will email the questionnaire to their instructor. Students will also be given an outline of the materials that will be
covered which contains all of the performance objectives they are to master in the module (Appendix II). Students who successfully complete
the module will not have to attend additional after school remedial activities as an additional incentive to successfully complete the program.
Content Presentation
This training will be available to the students through the campus shared “S” drive which is available to all students. The training will also be
available through their English teacher’s website and through a wiki. Students will first complete the pre-knowledge assessment and confidence
building checklist found in Appendix I. They will then email the results to their instructor. The instructor will review and send the students
instructions to proceed to step 2 which is to review the instructional goals of the module (Appendix II) and listen to a podcast over the unit
(script found on Appendix III). At the end of the podcast the students will be given instructions to send an email to the instructor with the goals
of the module to indicate they did in fact read Appendix II and listen to the podcast. This is also another chance for the student to ask any
preliminary questions.
Once the instructor has received the email covering the instructional goals students will be directed to watch a Camtasia created video which
instructs them on the 5 strategies for attention grabbing sentences as well as the components for and placement of a thesis statement.
Learner Participation
At the end of the instructional video students will be directed to create their own attention grabbing sentence using each of the five strategies
and email them to the instructor. The instructor will review these sentences to check for accuracy. Students will also be prompted during the
video to create their own thesis statement which must include all 3 components.
The instructor will review the email to check for accuracy and will provide students feedback for corrections as needed. Instructor will also send
students a question via email as to which type of essay expository vs. literary is each strategy most effective for (email located Appendix IV).
Assessment
Students will be able to access assessment through campus shared drive, their English teacher’s website, and through a school wiki. The
assessment will consist of 1 multiple choice question, 2 short answer questions, and 2 prompts for which students will write introductory
paragraphs. Once they have completed the assessment they will email their responses to the instructor for review. Students will be directed via
email to correct and review the video as much as needed to ensure accurate responses.
The assessment will be graded utilizing the rubric below:
Activity
Identify 5 strategies for attention grabbing sentence
Identify 3 parts of a thesis statement
Analyze function of each of the three parts of a thesis statement
Expository prompt: Write effective thesis statement with all three components.
Expository prompt: Select appropriate attention grabbing strategy for 1st sentence of
introductory paragraph.
Expository prompt: Correctly utilize and compose attention grabbing 1st sentence of
introductory paragraph.
Literary prompt: Select appropriate attention grabbing strategy for 1st sentence of introductory
paragraph.
Literary prompt: Correctly utilize and compose attention grabbing 1st sentence of introductory
paragraph.
Total
Points
10
10
10
20
10
15
10
15
100
Follow-through Activities
Students will be provided with a study sheet following successful completion of the assessment to ensure that they have materials to review
prior to retaking their EOC English I Writing STAAR test. The study sheet can be found in Appendix V and contains bulleted points which were
covered in the video, podcast, and the instructional goals (Appendix II). Students will be reminded on this study sheet they can and should
contact instructor as well as any member of the English department if they questions regarding the material covered in the module.
Media Selection and Delivery System
1. Podcast-Instruction for this unit will be provided using a podcast to introduce the unit. This is appropriate as students will be forced to
read the materials provided and referenced in the podcast and will ensure that students will reading deficiencies will still be able to
successfully complete the module with the added auditory cues.
2. Camtasia & Power point- The module itself will be presented using Camtasia and power point. The combination will allow students
auditory and visual cues. It will also serve as a method to prompt students to take notes and a model of how to do so. The simple
imagery created from the program is cost effective for schools and will not distract students from the instructional goals and tone of the
unit.
3. Web based and Campus Shared Drive instructional guide- The pre-skills checklist, instructional module goals, assessment, and study
sheet will all be located on the instructor’s website, the campus shared drive, and a wiki. This will allow students to access the materials
on site at the campus and on their own time at home. The multiple access points will give instructors and students freedom to choose
their own schedule for interaction.