he place where Hmong teens can speak and be heard.
Transcription
he place where Hmong teens can speak and be heard.
hmoobteen.hmong.org he place where Hmong teens can speak and be heard. HmoobTeen This publication is made possible through Hmong American Partnership (HAP). HAP provides culturally appropriate social services to Hmong families in Minnesota, such as: employment services and English language classes for adults, after school programs for children and youth, and counseling and support programs for families. For more information please visit www.hmong.org. Hmong American Partnership Attn: HmoobTeen 1075 Arcade Street Saint Paul, Minnesota 55106 (651) 495-9160 [email protected] hmoobteen.hmong.org Contents HmoobTeen magazine may not be reproduced. SEX Summer 2010 Regulars Editors Bios: Who Was Your First Crush? Editors Bios: What’s The Worst Pick-up Line You’ve Heard? Editor’s Note Knowing Your Hmong: You Know You’re Hmong When Check Nws Out!: StarFam Adult Role Model: Bao Vang Public Health Column Get To Know Your Birth Control Options Victim of Love: Sexual Violence and Relationships Early Sex and Teens: What are the Consequences? Theme: Sex Sexcitement No Sex Education Sex Education What People Should Do! Think First Before Doing It Abstinence: Does It Still Exist? Blong Yang’s Journal: October 8, 2007 Public Display of Affection First Time Midnight Shifts At Mercy FEATURE: HmoobTeen Editors’ Have A Honest Conversation about Sex and Relationships Reads Become a HmoobTeen Editor! Hnub Tshiab Celebrates the Establishment of The Hmong Women’s Endowment Fund Making The right College Choices College Survival Guide Comics Angry Hmong Girl Sex!? The Somebody Page 2 Page 27 Page 4 Page 6 Page 8 Page 9 Page 19 Page 20 Page 21 Page 10 Page 10 Page 11 Page 11 Page 11 Page 12 Page 13 Page 14 Page 15 Page 15 Pages 16-18 Page 5 Page 7 Page 22 Page 23 Page 24 Page 25 Page 26 Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 3 HmoobTeen Editor’s Note: Fall 2010 theme is: Education & Poverty Tell us: Why education is important? Is learning more than just at school? What is life like in poverty? DEADLINE: August 20, 2010 Send your work in! Email: [email protected] or Mail to: 1075 Arcade Street, Saint Paul, Minnesota 55106 Submissions unrelated to the themes are also accepted. Winter 2010 theme is: Our Story Cloth Tell us: Your thoughts on leadership in the Hmong community? Will our cultural tradtions die in the near future? Where will the Hmong people be in 50 years? What do you love and dislike about being Hmong? DEADLINE: October 10, 2010 I created an online survey asking the question, “Do you believe in abstinence?” The results may surprise you. Be sure to read this issue’s feature; Editors’ Thoughts on Sex and Relationships put together by Editor-In-Chief, Sai Vang. In addition Editor, Sandy Xiong wrote about her first experience with sex education. We hope that this issue will benefit you and the people around you. Thank you for picking up a copy and making our voices heard and making the voices of Hmong teens heard. After all, this is the place where you can speak and be heard. ~ Meng Yang 4 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Editor In Chief Sai Vang Layout & Design Sai Vang, Yeej Moua, Linda Thao, Matthew Saykao Thao SEND IT IN! It’s summer time and HmoobTeen brings you a theme that is not always easy to talk or write about, but is on almost every teen’s mind. This summer we dedicated this issue to the topic of SEX. As teenagers, the idea of sex may give you discomfort or it may not. It just depends on how you look at it. We decided to devote this summer’s issue to sex because it seems to be a topic that is always kept quiet. For the most part, the topic of sex should be kept private, but as a community it is a topic that is much needed to be discussed. Sex should not be something that is kept in darkness. The more we know about sex, the smarter we will be on devoting ourselves to making the correct choices. Throughout the magazine you’ll find many topics surrounding sex such as abstinence, sex education, the consequences of sex and many more. HmoobTeen Editors Nhia Lee, Nhia “Monie” Lee, Panhia Lee, Yang Lee, Jennifer Lor, Jennifer Lysaythong, Yeej Moua, Linda Thao, Manee B. Thao, Matthew Saykao Thao, Ka Zoua Vang, Blong Vang, Bao Xiong, Sandy Xiong, Kelly Z. Yang, Meng Yang CONTRIBUTING WRITERS and ARTISTS Mysee Chang, Yong Vang, Cheng Yang, Yod Xiong, Daranee Her, Kevin Yang, Katoou Thao, Christina Vang, Laura Vang, Liang Xiong, Chia Mee Vang, Dara Lee We pay for work we publish. Articles/Photo Essays/Comics: up to $25 Drawings: up to $20 Poems: up to $15 You must include your name, age, city, state, telephone number and email where we can reach you--even if you wish to remain anonymous. All submissions are subject to revision. We may contact authors to work with authors on revisions. Submission Requirements: Art-Must be on unlined paper and MUST NOT be folded. Writing-Type in MS Word and attach document to your email. HmoobTeen holds all the rights of works once published. Submissions sent to HmoobTeen becomes HmoobTeen property, it is done at the risk of the sender and will not be returned. Email your work if you can. HmoobTeen (ISSN 1935-1542) is published 4 times a year: Summer, Summer, Winter and Winter by Hmong American Partnership. Currently we reach over 20,000 readers per issue. Our next issue, is the Summer 2010 issue, with the theme Sex will be out June 29, 2010. Subscriptions/Back Issues: (651) 495-1526 or [email protected] The views expressed in this publication are of the authors’ and do not represent opinions or the views of Hmong American Partnership (HAP) or HmoobTeen, their staff, volunteers, funders or partners. HmoobTeen tries its best to screen websites listed in the magazine. However, the content, views and opinions displayed and expressed by the websites and/ or their respective organizations may, or may not reflect those of HmoobTeen and HAP. HmoobTeen is made possible, in part, by funds provided by the Eliminating Health Disparities Initiative from the Minnesota Department of Health, United Way, and the Office of Justice Programs from the Minnesota Department of Public Safety. HmoobTeen Magainze was launched in 1997 as “the place for Hmong teens to speak and be heard”. HmoobTeen has grown into a nationally distributed youth magazine produced and written entirely by a team of dedicated Editors and teens from around the country. We are currently seeking new teen Editors from the Twin Cities metro area and Contributing Editors from outside of Minnesota! We want Hmong teens 13-18 years old who love to write and or create art, are curious about the world, are not afraid to ask questions and not afraid to speak their minds! To apply send us a letter of interest stating the following: 1) Why you want to be an Editor 2) What your interests are 3) What other activities you are involved in 4) What are your career goals Include writing and art samples* with your contact information, including, your name, complete address, age, telephone and email (email addresses are a MUST!) to [email protected] or drop-off/mail to: HmoobTeen Magazine Hmong American Partnership 1075 Arcade Street Saint Paul, Minnesota 55106 Deadline: Sept. 24, 2010 Contact: Sai Vang, Editor-in-Chief Email - [email protected] Phone - (651) 495-1526 *Written and design samples will not be returned. Become a HmoobTeen Editor Seeking New Editors from the Twin Citie s area & outside of Min neosta! Editor Job Descriptions Copy Editors • Conduct interviews with youths, leaders, musicians, etc. • Research and write articles • Edit and select submissions for publication • Proof read submissions Media Editors • Update/maintain website and social media pages Marketing Editors • Promote events, magazine, and advertisment sales Visual Arts Editors • Take photographs for writing assignments • Edit and select visual submissions for publication All Editors • Provide editorial direction for each issue • Assist in the planning of events Editors must be able to work independently and as a team. Editors receive monthly stipends and are paid for written articles or designs published. Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 5 Knowing Your Hmong . . . n e h w g n o m h e r ’ u o Y w o n K u o Y r, 19, Andover, Edito , HmoobTeen By Blong Vang A short list of things that makes you Hmong. 1) Your house has a photo of General Vang Pao hung somewhere in the house. 2) You’ve attended a Hmong tournament. 3) You’ve attended a Hmong New Year Celebration. 4) You have a friend name Mai, examples: Mai Nou, Maita, and Mai Ka. 5) You have a small garden in your backyard with peppers, squash, cucumbers, corn, cilantro and many more. 6) You or someone in your family owns a Toyota or a Honda vehicle. 7) You have ate boil chicken with Hmong herbs and rice. 8) You have a Mexican blanket. 9) You know someone who was married before the ages of 18. 10) You have an Asiantown.net account. 11) You listened to Paradise, KLS, WhyteShadow, Lue Yaj, or Cha Mee Xiong. 12) You or someone believes in Shamanism. 13) You’re a fan of papaya salad. 14) You or someone you know is from a family of eight or more siblings. 15) Your family owns traditional Hmong knives. 16) You read Hmong newspaper and magazines. 17) You speak Hmong. 18) Your parent compares you to your relatives about education, appearances, and work experiences. 6 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 MN 6. 13. 15. Are you a St. Paul teen? Interested in TV or media production? Want to make a change in your community? Set It Up, a teen-produced TV show in Saint Paul, is currently accepting applications for the 2009-2010 season! Set It Up is an SPNN after-school program for St. Paul high school students that teaches all aspects of television production. Teens get the chance to do everything from pitching an idea for a segment to directing a studio shoot. Set It Up airs every Monday night at 7pm on YTV- Channel 16 in St. Paul. For more info or to apply, go to www.spnn.org/youth and download an application or contact us at [email protected]. (651) 298-8903 www.spnn.org/youth Hnub Tshiab Celebrates the Establishment of The Hmong Women’s Endowment Fund On March 30th, 2010, Hnub Tshiab: Hmong Women Achieving Together celebrated the naming of the Hmong Women’s Fund. ensure that long after we are gone, this work continues into the future,” said Nou Yang, the current Board Chair of HWAT. In less than five months, with the help of family and friends, the group reached their goal, raising $25,000 to establish the endowment. “This is just the beginning,” Nou Yang said, “a stepping stone to our ultimate goal of raising $3 million.” Hnub Tshiab: Hmong Women Achieving Together (HWAT) is a non-profit organization that was founded in 1998, when a group of Hmong women leaders gathered together at a retreat to talk about issues affecting Hmong women and girls. In 2005, another retreat was held to discuss the progress that Hmong women have made since 1998. It was realized that individually, Hmong women have progressed and achieved but sadly at the institutional level there were still social and cultural norms that prevented the full success of Hmong women. HWAT’s mission is to be a catalyst for lasting cultural, institutional, and social change to improve the lives of Hmong women. By 2015, HWAT hopes to accomplish their goal of raising three million dollars. Of the fund, $500,000 will go towards the creation of the Hmong Women’s Center and the rest of the fund will ensure the operational and financial sustainability of HWAT. Board Members believe that the creation of the Hmong Women’s Center is significant for many reasons. The center will serve as an office for HWAT and enable programming that will build Hmong women leaders, create and continue family dialogues about gender and social change, strengthen intergenerational relationships and serve as a neutral space where Hmong women can meet and gather to talk about important business and social issues. One way HWAT is working to accomplish their mission of creating lasting cultural and institutional change, is by establishing the Hmong Women’s Endowment Fund. “It was with this frame of mind that over a year ago, the Board of Hnub Tshiab made a commitment that we are in this work for the long haul. We wanted to Currently, Hnub Tshiab: Hmong Women Achieving Together is working hard to reach their goal of $3 million. If you would like to make a contribution, volunteer or would like to know more about HWAT, please visit HWAT’s website at www.hmongwomenachieve. org or email HWAT at [email protected]. By Mysee Chang, 19, Mounds View, MN Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 7 Check Nws Out! Starfam: On the Rise By Meng Yang, HmoobTeen Editor, 19, Circle Pines, MN On February 27th, 2010, HmoobTeen Magazine held our Second Basketball Tournament Fundraiser. With the success of last year’s tournament, we looked to make this year’s bigger and better. Last year the tournament held 12 teams; there were 14 this year. Out of the 14 teams, one team emerged as the undisputed champions: Starfam. With their ability to shoot the three, drive it to the rim, and move the ball efficiently, they captured the championship going undefeated throughout the tournament. I sat down with four members of Starfam; Kang Phen, Jimmy Phann, Norris Oui, and Steven Deng, and asked them a few questions about basketball, life, and winning the championship. As one of the most recognized Asian-American basketball teams under twenty in the Twin Cities, it didn’t take a long time for the team to start winning championships once they were formed more than two years ago. They credit their positive attitudes in helping them advance their game. Jimmy Phann explained, “What motivates me to play is watching other basketball players. If I see someone who is good, I’m motivated to become better.” Teammate Kang Phen added, “Unfairness and teams that talk trash, we don’t like to talk; we let our game speak for itself,” says Kang Phen. Their name represents family. The group is more than a basketball team. They are a family. All of them hang out together outside the game of basketball and they all consider each other brothers. Their bond is as strong as their talent. By means of their winning ways, Starfam is a threat in any tournament and their best is yet to come. 2010 Tournament Final Four 1. Starfam 2. Royals 3. Team Magnificent 4. Elite 8 8 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Adult Role Model The Insider with Bao Vang By Meng Yang, HmoobTeen Editor, 19, Circle Pines, MN ______________________________________________ H mong people do not get on television very often, and it is even rarer to see a Hmong person on television on a daily basis. Unless you watch Sunrise 7 WSAW News Channel 7 in Wausau, Wisconsin. Bao Vang is the anchor and executive producer of Sunrise 7. Born and raised in Saint Paul, Minnesota, the youngest of seven children, Bao attended Harding High School where she received her first taste of broadcasting. “I first learned about broadcasting in high school. Harding offered students the opportunity to read announcements live on the air to 2,000 plus of our fellow students and teachers every day. I tried it and I liked it – it was as simple as that!” she explained. Since then she has not looked back. Bao worked tremendously hard on her delivery, speech, diction, and confidence. She went on to major in broadcast journalism and Spanish at the University of Saint Thomas and graduated in 2006. Furthermore she is a leader and an excellent role model for teenagers everywhere. Like most Hmong teens, Bao’s parents did not approve of her career choice. Her mother would rather have had her go into the medical field or become a teacher. However that did not stop her from chasing her passion for broadcasting. As the youngest of seven, Bao is very grateful for her brothers and sisters. She said, “As the youngest of seven surviving children, I was grateful to have four very protective brothers and two sisters who held my hand through growing pains. I thank them for caring enough about me to encourage me to be the best person I can be.” As a result, her family has had the biggest influence in her life. “I knew they wanted the best for me so I did all I could in school and in life to honor them.” Bao is a tremendous inspiration for me. She is the prime example of knowing what you want to do and doing it. I asked Bao some questions about broadcasting and her career. What is it like to be on TV every day? “First and foremost, it’s fun. Secondly, I take the honor very seriously, trying to produce the most up-to-date news and information for our viewers every morning. “ Do people recognize you? “I never assume anyone knows me. So I smile to everyone so as to signal to my fans that I am approachable and allow them to say ‘hello’. The kids are the only ones who ask for an autograph, which I occasionally give out.” How do you like broadcasting? “I am a natural-born storyteller and broadcasting allows me to tell stories to thousands of people every day. Who wouldn’t want my job?” How did you achieve your goal and what separates you from other people in your field? “It’s going to sound cliche but hard work and determination. I was passionate about ‘making it in the big world’ during high school and college and achieved my goal through networking, earning internships and never allowing a few setbacks to get the best of me. I would like to believe I have an advantage over some other journalists because through the history of my people and cultural experiences, I can offer a different perspective in a mainstream newsroom. I also proficiently speak, read and write English, Hmong and Spanish.” If you are interested in broadcasting, Bao is willing and able to answer any questions you have. Please email her at [email protected] or you can stop by her news station for a visit. Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 9 Sex By Sandy Xiong, HmoobTeen Edit or, 17, Maplewood, MN I was a fifth grader in Mrs. Nabil’s class when I was first introduced to the inner workings of sex. Back then, my favorite thing to do was sit on the swings, and pushing myself to reach the sky. However, after recess one particular day, we had visitors in our classroom. There was a man and a woman who warned us to prepare ourselves as they introduced themselves. The man, in turn, acknowledged our young age, and told us, “I will give you, say, about five minutes to roll on the floor and laugh, chuckle and snicker; afterwards, please try to restrain yourself from giggling.” The woman had unfurled a folded board, and on the front was a diagram of a nude woman for all to see. The man had unfolded a board of his own, and there was a picture of a naked man. The whole class erupted in laughter. The visitors pointed out body parts (both external and internal), the male and female genitals, the fallopian tube and ovaries, the testis and scrotum - all these mysterious words. I will admit, I did find it interesting to learn about sex, but I thought to myself, “Why are they telling us this now?” It was as if they were expecting us to go home and utilize this information to the best of our abilities, when we were just a classroom full of giggling children. I remember lunch that day, animatedly talking with my friends; asking who had already had their period, who were wearing a training bra, who would ever use a tampon and which boys seemed to already have reached puberty. It was petty talk, but it almost became an obsession. Suddenly everything revolved around boys and hormones. We became interested in gossip, about who liked who, and all this “big kid” stuff instead of running around and playing tag. Everyone was in a rush to grow up. We were all excited about learning these new things wanted to experience them. At that point, we had built a tremendous curiosity for the unknown. I don’t know why we were so enthralled with sex, though, or why we still are. It was just something that everyone kept talking about in the media, with the older kids, on television, the internet. It was everywhere. We were kids and curious about the world. However, the more we learned, the more we were forced to grow up. We realized that there was more to life than scoring a goal on the soccer field and running the fastest in a game of tag. For me, there was really no need to grow up so fast. We might have been extremely excited about growing up, but I still remember the days when the most exciting things included learning the next letter in the alphabet, seeing what happens when you mix red and blue, and the smell of freshly burned wood when you sharpen your pencil. Growing up, Hollywood and the media inflated the image of sex. If I could, I would just return to the few days of innocence I had before I learned about the inner workings of sex. My innocent mind was suddenly stripped of its fairy tale world. Thinking back, I don’t know why we laughed at those nude pictures. Maybe it was because we knew how silly it was to get worked up about sex and nudity. Maybe we knew that there were bigger and better things in life, like reaching for the sky while simply sitting on a swing. No Sex Education at 13 By Yong Vang, 13, Saint Paul, MN Hearing and learning about sex is not cool at my age of 13. It is not fun. It makes others feel uncomfortable. Some of my friends said that when you learn about sex you should be at least 16 or even older. I think 18 is the perfect age to be learning about sex. My attitude about sex is nothing because I don’t like learning about it in class or outside of class. My brothers and sisters say that learning about sex is good for you but I don’t see what is so fun about it. My parents say nothing because they know nothing about sex, or maybe they do, but they never talk about it to me. I think that’s a good idea. 10 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Sex Sex Education by Cheng Yang, 17, Saint Paul, MN Some teens make the biggest mistake of their lives by ditching health class. Little do they know that the stuff they teach is good to known, like sex education. The class might be boring but the lesson might be useful. In health class, they teach about the consequences (both positive and negative) of wearing protection during intercourse. If they paid attention during health class, they would have learned about protection, HIV and babies. Some teens are unaware of the consequences of not wearing protection. I knew this one guy who went to school with me. He’d always ditch health class every single day. Later on in the year, I heard that he contracted herpes from a party he went to. From then on I never seen or heard of him ever. In the end, I think sex education isn’t really that boring. It’s good to listen to these lessons and use them in real life situations. So if I were you, I would think twice about ditching health class. What People Should Do! By Yod Xiong, 12, Saint Paul, MN I think people should have sex when they’re married or when they’re older (over 18 years old). If you do have sex you might get AIDS from it. One thing you should never do is have sex when you are 12 or 13 years old. Some people think they could do whatever they want, like smoking, having sex and getting out of school at 12 or 14. I have seen people that drop out of school when they’re 14 and I know one person really well. He told he that he had a hard time and he didn’t have anywhere to go. He would sleep outside day and night doing nothing. My dad and mom always tell me not do bad things at school, like getting in a fight, not doing all my work, and other things that are bad. My dad always says thing like, “If you don’t think about what you’re doing right now, your future will be nothing.” Like, there is no future for you. My dad told me to think about my future and what I should do when I’m on my own. He told me to be good and be successful in school because he asked, “What if you one day I wake up and he’s gone, what will I do?” That is why he told me tot learn everything I could, and use it when my dad is gone in my life. About sex, my dad said you should have sex when you’re married. That is the only time. And he told me do not even think about sex at my age. For me to think about my life, the future, and what to do when I’m over 18 years old. Think First Before Doing It By Daranee Her, 13, Saint Paul, MN including artwork I think love is freedom. Nobody can force you to love someone. But having sex is a problem. Teenagers aren’t ready to be parents yet. I think they need to graduate first before they marry or have sex. Even older people around 18 -21 should need to learn how to cook and do chores in the house before marriage. I think about 60% of teenagers know how to cook eggs and noodles in the microwave but don’t know how to do chores yet. About 90% of all mother-in-laws don’t like to eat noodles and eggs all the time. Girls, learn how to cook first before you think about marriage or having babies. Some of my friends think that it is freedom. If I ask my mom, she would say, “Need to graduate first before thinking about it.” I know kids in my school think about sex a lot but they don’t think about their future. Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 11 Sex Abstinence: Does it still exist? By Meng Yang, HmoobTeen Editor, Circle Pines, MN, 19 What is abstinence? For a simple definition; abstinence is not having sex until you are married. I wanted to find out if teens and young adults are practicing these days and age because there are so many young parents. I’m sure you know at least one person who is married due to unexpected pregnancy. The results did not surprise me; it was what I thought it would be because I believe teens treat sex like it is the “in” thing to do and they need to have sex to be considered part of the “in” crowd. I made a one question (yes or no) survey on QuestionPro.com asking, “Do you practice abstinence?” I posted the survey on the popular site Asiantown.net and I posted the survey on my Facebook page. A total of 50 teens and young adults took the survey and the results came out one sided. An astounding, 72 percent answered no and a meager 28 percent answered, yes. Yes 28% No To me, this says teens and young adults are simply not waiting for marriage to have sex. It’s hard for teens to fight the urge when the media has so much influence, such as TV, movies, and music lyrics influence sex so much. Though that might not be the only reason teens choose to have sex before marriage. I talked to one of the survey takers and he said the only reason he had sex before marriage is because his friends pressured him. Whatever the reason, the results show that abstinence is not practiced by many teens. Whether you choose to have sex or to wait for marriage, the choice is yours; just remember to always be safe. 12 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Artwork by Christina Vang, Oroville, CA 72% Sex Blong Yang’s Journal October 8th, 2007 People say, “it’s not too late to change” but they say so because they’ve never been too deep into the kind of chaos where they can’t turn back on what they have done. There are many things people would rather not remember or turn back on. It was years back, when Mom divorced Dad. The result of all this inflicted on me personally because I was only seven, probably eight and couldn’t maturely grasp anything to full potential. The divorce made it so wherever I went my cousins, they no longer seemed like my cousins, and my family was not a family. Wherever I went, there was the feeling of awkwardness, as though I was an orphan. Even our home wasn’t a home anymore. I stood alone and in darkness because I didn’t know. I wanted to ask everyone “am I defined by my family?” Whenever I met my cousins it felt as thought they tried to act like nothing had changed, as though they’re accepting and understanding. But in their eyes it clearly told me, “your mother divorced your father, but she also divorced us and you live with her. You chose her over us.” I felt as thought behind those warm faces were pint up hatred and anger inside. They’re like strangers. Strangers I talked with, grew up with, played games with, watched movies with and every moment felt like we didn’t know each other at all. My mother’s decision for happiness and release, was my horrifying nightmare. It drove me insane feeling like I wanted to cry but can’t, feeling like I wanted to kill someone but I shouldn’t; feeling like I wanted to lock myself and shut myself from the world completely. My classmates and family didn’t even know that the one always acting tough, always giving a smile whenever they make laugh, argued with them, boss them, ate with them, helped them and play games with them was someone they don’t know. I am the stranger now. I hope it’s true that “it’s not too late to change.” Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 13 Sex Public Display of Affection By Jennifer Lysaythong, HmoobTeen Editor, 17, Sacramento, CA “Ding Dong, Ding Dong!” The bell rings and I gather my stuff into my backpack and head out the door. Some students are walking slowly like lazy turtles; some are running lightening fast as the cartoon character; Sonic. Some aren’t moving at all; couples are kissing in the hallway touching each other. As I walk pass, I silently say, “Get a room.” I am tired of seeing students making out in the middle of the hallway, blocking traffic as we students try to get by them as we go to our next classrooms. “Lunch time!” Jerry say. It was a warm afternoon at 12:35pm, my friends and I were walking to the X wing of the school building where the tennis courts are to see the hot guys play tennis. By the time we got there bunch of couples were kissing and holding each other hands. I was so disturbed by the kissing sounds, laughter, giggling, and the “Oh stop it babe.” I was not able to admire those lovely tennis players. My friend and I were talking among ourselves about teenagers displaying too much and how the girls are showing too much skin to guys. When I take a look at the couples, I notice every teen girls are wearing short shorts that are probably not three inch above their knees. Their shirt are short to the belly button and some are crossing over the dress code. Anyway, I want to snitch on them and tell to the principal, but the school won’t do anything. One time I was walking to my forensic class and saw this Hmong couple kissing. The girl hands was tightly over the guy shoulder and the guy hands was on the girl waist and they walk drunkenly toward to the Principal kissing. “Oh my gosh”, I said. My mind was surprised that they were not in trouble. I was hoping they would get detention, but I guess not. My parents always lecture me about how I should appear in public, how I should act, behave, use manners, and not do any type stuff that will give me a bad name. I always keep those words in my mind and keep it as a reference. I cannot understand why teens would like to display so much affection in public. What I thought was that teens like to show off in public. They want to show off that she or he is my girlfriend/boyfriend so back off. Therefore I see couples in mall displaying a lot. There was this guy putting his hand inside the girl’s back pants and I was just looking at the clothes display and noticed. I wish my eyes had gone blind from that moment. It was gross and I wanted to throw up and just say, “ Hellooo! This is a public mall, go somewhere and display your love, like a motel or your house.” The main reason why I think teens are showing too much affection is because they are easily influence by other people’s public display of affection. Though I can understand the need to show your affections, I sometime felt like kissing one of the tennis players at my school in front of his friends and not care about what others think. But I will not going overboard. I am fine with a kiss on the cheek. 14 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Poetry First Time By Anonymous He made me smile and made me laugh Who would know things like this would never last After the party, my head in a buzz He took me to a place just He told me he wanted to love me Told me I was his princess, soon I’ll see I was young and believed every word He was an older guy who experimented with the world Looked into the sky as he kissed me My eyes closed as he undress me He touched me places that made me feel weird His warmth took the cold away, it felt so pure My heart raced, this didn’t feel right My stupid curiosity gave in as I closed my eyes tight The pain pierced in between me I wanted to shout, tell him to stop, to let me go free In the end, my virginity held onto him He took every advantage of me because of this sin I was a slave, thought he was my only one He was smart and manipulative, always wanted some fun He lied and cheated, he was experienced I was dumb and young, took his tolerance Now I am free, I realized he’s not for me Found out later I’ve gotten an STI If not sooner, I’d never been able to have a child Even now I know he still mess with younger girls He can’t have kids, so watch out for that pedophile! Midnight Shifts at Mercy Artwork by Katoou Thao, 17, Brooklyn Park, MN By Kevin Yang, Brooklyn Park, MN I used to know a couple that used to smoke cigarettes together because they promised that they would burn their lives side by side. They used to share cigarettes and her cherry lipstick used to chap his lips. He could always taste her red tongue along the pale dyes of the filter. And he loved it. They use to fight over the best brands. If he was going to die with her, he at least wanted to die with taste and style. She could have cared less. sparks destroyed everything in her mind, left everything as ash so she carried premium matches everywhere she went. It was an addiction really, two pack a day and hint: It wasn’t because of the nicotine. Maybe it was the rat poison. She remembered those old anti-tobacco commercials those urgent public service announcements, old geezers with gaping holes in throats, rotting molars on swollen gums undersized fetus. She would have killed to have an undersized fetus, oversized fetus, didn’t matter, with him. But no, they just smoked. A lot. Since then, I’ve stopped asking questions in emergency room lobbies. Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 15 sex & relationbout ation A s r e v n o C nest S P I H S N O I LAT ve A Ho rs’ Ha o it d E n e e HmoobT E R & X SE Questions by On a scale from one to ten, how much do you know about sex? Manee: Five, because I’ve never had sex and she’s learned some stuff about it. I know about STDs and condoms. Jennifer Lor: I would say six because I’ve been through the whole process in sex education and I’ve never done anything so I wouldn’t know. Kelly: I would say a nine. Honestly, I’ve been there before and I do learn sex education in school. Meng: I would say a ten because I’m older than everyone here. So I have friends that go through a lot of stuff and they tell me, a lot of guy friends that tell me a lot of things. All that sex education and media, really helps me know what it’s all about. Panhia: I would say an eight because you learn from sex [education] and I have a lot of friends who have been there and have been pregnant without using protection. I 16 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 in-Chief en Editor- Te , Hmoob Sai Vang guess I know the process of it but not really the outcome. Sandy: It kinda depends because there is the sex part and the making babies part. I’d say probably an eight. We have had sex education and I did find it very interesting. I probably laughed a lot but still found it interesting. Matt: I’ll probably say eight not because I learned much from class but from what people talk and tell me about that I never learn. So I’m still learning. Is it true that guys always think about sex? The myth is every five seconds. Matt: No. Meng: Yes, but not every five seconds. I think that’s little exaggeration but I do think guys think about sex a lot. Matt: I think that depends on people but for me I don’t. I have to be cleared minded. The myth is that guys think about sex more than girls. Meng: I really think that girls and guys think about it the same, its kinda equal. I mean girls don’t show it. Guys they have a way of showing it. They are known for showing their sexual [desire]. Yea, I think they think about it equally. Sometimes girls think about it more, from what I’ve heard. Matt: Yeah, I agree with that. Do the ladies agree with what Meng said? Jennifer Lor: It depends on the person. If people want to make babies, people just want to do it, people just caught in the moment and they do it. Manee: I guess in the teenager years, guys and girls do both think about it the same. It’s your prime [years] and your instinct to reproduce. So I’m pretty sure it’s your instinct to think about it too. sex & rela- Sex on a typical day, how often do you think about sex? Meng: I wouldn’t be able to count. Matt: Probably per week, once or twice. Sandy: I really never think about it. Unless people start joking around about it, you’d think about it. But you wouldn’t really stop and say, ‘oh, I want to think about condoms or think about making babies.’ Manee: Generally, in a day, probably like three to five times. It’s not like, ‘oh wow, I wonder how sex is?’ It’s just sex. It’s just something that pops in your head. And then you kinda just forget it. With guys, I think it kinda just lingers on that idea. Meng: With guys, anything that pops up like they see an attractive girl, they think about sex. They see something on TV or in the movies and then they get aroused. It’s kinda a lot for a guy. “I think it’s a natural thing for guys and girls to think about it.”” Jennifer Lor: Do you feel pressure to have sex in a relationship? Jennifer Lor: Definitely not. People take their relationship differently. If I’m serious about a relationship, I’ll be serious. But If I don’t want to do something he wants to do, I expect him to respect my decisions. I don’t think that in order to make someone happy, you need to have sex with them. HmoobTeen Don’t miss a single issue! Kelly: I got out of my relationship because of that. I didn’t feel that sex was the only thing I wanted from a relationship. It’s more than sex. It’s just best to know each other. In relationship, its best to know the person and sex is at the other end. To be in a relationship just for sex is not worth it. Meng: I think if you’re in a relationship, sex should only come when you really get to know each other. At least you’ve dated for awhile, and you’re very comfortable with each other. You know each other inside and out. Sex should only come when both parties are ready to do it. It can’t be one side, if it’s one side, the relationship won’t work anyway. Do you feel pressure to have sex by your friends? Meng: Oh yeah, all the time – seriously, all the time. When we we’re 16 and 17, they said, “Oh, you’re the only one left”. But now, one is married and one has a kid. And where does that get you to, if that’s the consequences of having sex early. I’m going to college and I have a job. They are at home watching their kid. I don’t know who’s laughing now. Jennifer Lor: My school is mixed within grades and I have a lot of older friends, they definitely talk about it. They respect me as a younger person, and they don’t really say that I should do it. But they do sometimes bring up the sex talk - I’m not comfortable with it but they don’t pressure me. Manee: I don’t think any of my friends YES! have had sex. We do sometimes joke around about sex but we don’t pressure each other. My older friends don’t who’ve I’ve known for awhile never talk to me about sex, and I appreciate it. It’s awkward when an adults talks to me about sex. Matt: No one pressures me but I tell people don’t it, because it’s stupid. About a month ago, I said that relationships are based on sex. Once you’re done with sex, you’re done with your relationship. That’s why I tell people not to do it because it ruins your whole relationship. Meng: I can agree with that though. “You think that you’re all in love and then when you guys do it, that’s it. You can’t go on from there.” Matt: Meng: The next step is to have a baby. Manee: The first step is marriage. Sandy: It depends. Meng: That depends on a group of guys and girls. A group of girls, they don’t want you to go unless you’re really ready. With guys, we have a sense of talking differently within each other; it’s kind of like competition in a group. In my group, it’s always competition even though we’re really close. It’s about whose gonna do it first or whose going to do it the most. I want to subscribe now and read my own copy of HmoobTeen wherever and whenever I want. Send me 5 issues for just $10! Cut this box out & mail your check to HAP:1075 Arcade Street, Saint Paul, MN 55106. Please make checks payable to Hmong American Partnership. ___________________________________________ HmoobTeen can arrive at your home 5 times for just $10 Name ___________________________________________ Address ___________________________________________ City State Zip ___________________________________________ Email Phone HmoobTeen / 17 Summer Summer2010 2010 HmoobTeen / 19 sex & reaEditors’ have a honest converstaion about sex & relationships Continued from page 17 The stereotypes for girls who have sex or assumed to have had sex are whores, while guys are not. What are your thoughts on that? down upon. They have the expectation of staying in the house; cooking, cleaning, watching the kids. They social role, it’s always immediate thought that girls should do that. It’s really unfair and bias. Regardless, people still do what they want to do. Someone who has sex often, it’s not something to judge someone by. Meng: That’s what a guy does! Matt: For me, it’s different. If you have sex, you don’t talk about it; unless you mess up. “We don’t talk about it, until we In your circle of friends, do you run into a problem. Sandy: “I can see why guys brag about having sex? Most of my friends a girl is considered Meng: “Guys brag always ask me for a whore, because about it all the time. advices. I’m more of she is a girl she can If it’s just a group of a big sister. “ get it anytime she guys around, they wants. For a guy, is will bring it harder. So when he up. Like I said, actually gets it, then it’s always they are praise for competition. it. It’s just generally There’s always more difficult for some sort of guys.” bragging goMatt: But what if he gets the easy one? ing on.” Manee: I think Sandy is saying, guys depend on girls to say yes to do it. Meng: It’s like, a guy will never deny a girl but a girl will always deny a guy. Does that justify why girls are called whores? Matt: No, but girls are suppose to be all nice and conservative and pure. Guys can do whatever you want. Manee: Yeah, even in our culture it is like that. If you get a girl pregnant, you have to marry her. Kelly: The girl always has the bad name. Jennifer Lor: I think it’s what the social world offers. Women and men are praise different. Women are obviously looked 18 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Jennifer Lor: If my friends do something like that, they’ll tell me. But they won’t too graphic because they know I don’t want to hear. Meng: When a guy does something like that, it’s big news. One person knows and then everyone will know in an hour. Jennifer LOr: It is definitely about trust. If they trust me they’ll tell me. It’s not, “Oh, you guys, I did it! Oh, I did it!” Kelly: Pubilc Health Column Get to Know Your Birth Control Options By Ka Zoua Vang, HmoobTeen Editor, 18, Minneapolis, MN A s you grow older, you may become involve in intimate relationships and the decision to be or not be sexually active may present itself onto you. The decision is really up to you but whichever you choose; know that sex does have its consequences such as sexually transmitted diseases and or pregnancy. If you are not ready to be a parent, make sure to use birth control. Nationally, nearly one million young women under 20 years old become pregnant each year. That means close to 2,800 teens get pregnant each day! Some of these teen pregnancies are planned but the majority is not. They are the result of misused or no use of birth control. Birth control are the different methods to prevent or stop a girl from getting pregnant or giving birth. Birth control may refer to a variety of things from contraceptives (pills, injections) to abstinence (not having sex). There are birth control options for both boys and girls. If you choose to practice abstinence, it’s still valuable and important to know about the various birth control options for the future when you do decide to take that next step. There are a lot of birth control options out there and you should choose one that suits you and your partner. Some birth control methods work better than others depending on comfort and is not always 100% guaranteed in preventing pregnancies and or STIs. Be sure to consult with your local healthcare provider before using any contraception on proper usage. Abstinence is not having sex at all. A person who practices abstinence decides not to have sex. This applies to both men and women and there’s nothing wrong with this. Do not let peer pressure or other sources pressure you into it if you don’t want to. Abstinence is the only birth control option that guarantees 100% of not getting pregnant. The male condom is the only method of contraception for men. It is a rubber tube that’s closed at one end to prevent sperm from going inside of a girl. When used correctly, it is moderately effective in preventing pregnancies. Studies show only 15 out of 100 couples get pregnant a year using condom. When properly used, latex and polyurethane condoms are effective against most STDs. The female condom is not as widely used. It has a closed-end ring on one end and an open end on the other. The female condom is worn to create a barrier between the sperm and the female cervix. The female condom is less reliable with 21 out of 100 couples pregnant each year due to breakage or misuse. Some side effects of both female and male condoms include latex allergy or irritation due to lubricants some condoms are treated with. Also known as “the pill” is a daily birth control pill contain hormones to change the way the body works and prevents pregnancy. Most birth control pills contain hormones such as estrogen and progesterone to prevents the release of an egg during the monthly cycle. There are a variety of birth control pills including the combination pill, morning after pill and mini pill but any type of birth control pill will work best when it is taken every single day at the same time of day. It does not protect against STD’s and when used correctly, the chances of pregnancy are eight out of 100. Some side effects are irregular menstrual bleeding, nausea, headaches, dizziness, breast tenderness, mood changes, and blood clots. The birth control patch is a thin, square patch that sticks to the skin which releases hormones through the skin into the bloodstream to prevent pregnancy. Like the birth control pill, a girl uses the birth control patch based on her monthly menstrual cycle. She will change the patch on her skin which can be her abdomen, buttocks, upper arm or upper torso for three weeks in a row. The patch does not protect against pregnancy and unintended pregnancy occurs only eight out of 100 times. Some side effects include skin reactions at the site of application, problems with contact lens use (a change in vision or inability to wear the lenses) and menstrual cramps. Spermicides come in different forms including cream, foam and gel. They contain a chemical call nonoxynol-9 which kills the sperm before it reaches the uterus. Spermicides are best effective when used with other birth control method such as condom. 29 out of 100 couples get pregnant a year using spermicide alone. Spermicide does not protect against STD’s and side effects include irritation, recurrent urinary tract infections because the spermicide can disrupt the normal balance of bacteria in a girl’s body. Resources: 1) www.soundvision.com/Info/teens/stat.asp 2) www.kidshealth.org/teen/sexual_health Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 19 Public Health Column ves f ip h Lo s ion od at l e R mnce i t le c l Vio i V ua Sex By ng, Xio y d an an e bT o mo H S or, dit E en , 17 N ,M Ma p d oo lew Mai has never had a boyfriend before. When she found out that a boy in her class liked her, she was ecstatic. After a while, Mai would be asked out by this boy. They started to date, and after a while, the relationship became very serious. However, Mai was only a teenager, and she wasn’t sure if she was ready for all the new experiences that would come with dating. Her boyfriend, on the other hand, was very willing to initiate sexual acts. Mai loved her boyfriend, but it caused her pain that he would pressure her into these situations that made her feel uncomfortable. The situation only got worse though, to the point where Mai’s boyfriend would force himself onto her. According to chapter six of the “World Report on Violence” published in 2002 by the World Health Organization, sexual violence is defined as “any sexual act, attempt to obtain a sexual act, unwanted sexual comments or advances, or acts to traffic, or otherwise directed, against a person’s sexuality using coercion, by any person regardless of their relationship to the victim, in any setting, including but not limited to home and work.” This means that sexual violence can happen anywhere, anyhow and to anyone. Although it is an under reported crime, this only signifies that not many people are willing to come out with it. Sexual violence can be as simple as unwanted sexual comments at work or at school. It can also be as big of a problem as rape in a marriage, relationship, or even by strangers. To prevent sexual violence, it is important to be well educated in its area. Many people have the common misconception that only women are victims of sexual violence. Sexual violence can happen to anyone, from both women and men and towards either gender. To prevent sexual violence from occurring, it is important that you do not wander into unknown territories, especially by yourself or if you are younger. People can easily commit this crime and get away without cost or reparations. It is better to travel in groups of people you know well and whom you trust to lower your vulnerability. Consuming alcohol and drugs increases vulnerability and makes it much harder to protect yourself from sexual violence. This makes it more difficult to interpret and effectively act on warning signs, and this may place you in a setting where your chances of encountering a potential offender are much greater. As stated in the article provided by the World Health Organization, a national study of violence by against women in the United States found that women who were raped before the age of 18 years were twice as likely to be raped as adults, compared with those who were not raped as children or adolescents. Once a person has been sexually violated, it is easier for that person to accept it the next time the incident occurs. It is important that you realize how and why it occurred in the first place, and take the proper initiatives to prevent it from happening again. Furthermore, it may be detrimental to both your mental and physical health, and is advised that you see a physician and come forth with your issue, however embarrassing you may think it may be. Sexual violence has generally been a neglected topic in not only the Hmong community, but in the world as well. It is not a topic to take lightly, but much more need to be done both to understand sexual violence and prevent it from elevating into a situation like Mai’s. 20 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Early Sex and Teens: What Are The Consequences? By Laura Vang of Planned Parenthood of MN, ND, & SD I n 2007, 5,182 babies were born to girls between the ages of 15-19 and 67 babies were born to girls under the age of 15. Each day about 14 adolescents give birth to a baby (MOAPP 2010). Abstinence is the only 100% effective way to not get pregnant or contract a Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI) because one out of four teens will test positive for a STI. If you have a group of four friends, one of you will likely get a STI in your lifetime. Teen’s aged 15-19 make up 34% of Chlamydia cases and 28% of Gonorrhea cases. In 2008, there were 12 new cases of HIV/AIDS involving teens ages 13-19 in the state of Minnesota (MOAPP 2010). Despite the fact that most STIs are curable or treatable, some people who contract them don’t even know they have one, as some STIs have no symptoms. When a person doesn’t know they have an infection, they won’t get treatment and they can spread it to their sex partner. The most important thing to remember is that if you are going to be sexually active, it’s important to protect yourself. Get tested and use condoms! When I surveyed sexually active males and asked why they don’t use protection, most said it takes away the pleasure. Others say they don’t have the resources to help protect from contracting an STI or an unwanted pregnancy. The majority said they would rather not get a girl pregnant because they are too young to get married or become a father. However, we have friends, sisters and aunts who are forced into marriage because of an unplanned pregnancy. Teen pregnancy is a problem in our community and, although we don’t talk about it, it is there. It will not go away on its own unless we start talking about it and start learning about safer sex options. The major consequence of having sex at a young age in the Hmong community is that if a girl becomes pregnant she will probably have to marry the baby’s father. If a man chooses to not marry the girl, he would have to pay a cleansing price or kho to the girl’s parents at a cost of $1,200. If you think that’s expensive, imagine raising a child. On average it costs about $8,000 to $10,000 to raise a baby before it’s first birthday, not including hospital bills. We all know too well that in the Hmong community, if a girl has a child out of wed-lock she will have a harder time finding a husband much less a good and responsible man. She will likely be classified as “tainted goods” and parents will view her as not being “good enough” for their sons. It takes a great deal of courage for a man to step up to the plate and raise another man’s child and love him as his own. the age of 17. Because I didn’t have any social support, I had two more children soon after. Like most young couples, I was forced to turn to public assistance for food and shelter. I lived on food stamps and received cash aid in a small amount of $600 per month for a family of five. Every day I struggled to stay in school. Eventually, I had to drop out of high school and attended a teen mom class to get my GED. Soon after, I pushed myself through college and got a degree so that my three children wouldn’t be forced to live in poverty like many do when born to young parents. Reflecting back, what I want to relive are the lost moments that were taken away from my children because I was too busy juggling between work and school. I had step ladder children (1 each year) and didn’t give each child the undivided attention and even though they didn’t suffer any traumatic disorder from lack of time spent with them, they deserved to be loved to the highest capacity possible; and that was something that as a young parent, you don’t realize you took away until years down the road. Working for Planned Parenthood has put me at an advantage because I can educate teens about postponing sex until they are ready for all the responsibilities that come with having sex at an early age. There are so many teen parents in our Hmong community and although we look at it as nothing more than a young marriage, it is a barrier for them and for their children when it comes to accessing the best health care practice and services. I always say to my three teenage girls, “If you are not ready to be a parent, then don’t have sex.” It’s something I remind my girls and I would say the same to any teen. As a teen bride at the age of 15, I faced the struggles a young woman goes through when she is thrust into a married role. As a wife, you have to cook and clean for your in-laws, so education comes last to all of your responsibilities. I learned the hard way when I gave birth to my first child at But if you’re sexually active or plan to be, protect yourself. Call (800)230-PLAN (7526) for a Planned Parenthood clinic closest to you for birth control and pregnancy testing or get an STI tests. All calls and appointments are confidential and most people qualify for FREE services. Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 21 Lesson 2: Research. Visit campuses, research colleges (online and through brochures), and find out what you like. Don’t procrastinate or you’ll end up going to a school that won’t be to your taste. Even if you don’t have things intricately By Sandy Xiong, HmoobTeen Editor, 17, Maplewood, MN planned out, it’s better to have an idea of what you might want. There will be You’re at the very top of the mountain, things that can restrict looking down upon everything. From this you; financial issues, distance, housing, point of view, no matter which road you campus locations, etc. that you will want take, you’ll succeed. You’ve already made to know about ahead of time. Discuss it this far, nothing can stop you now. your college plan with your parents, your friends, your family and even your teachers Senior year. We all anticipate it, and yet and counselors. You want to make sure we all dread the end. You will find people that you are thorough in your decision constantly asking you, “So, what’s after making. high school?” For some, they may join the military, the marines, the army. For others, they will immediately enter the work force. As for me, I wanted to do something my parents never got an opportunity to do; attend college. Making the right college choice simply just ask your counselor and teachers. Lesson 4: The rest is up to you. You may or may not get accepted into the school of your choice; but this all depends on who you’ve been and strive to be. You are the one who is going to college, so you are the one who is going to have to work. As early as freshman year of high school, you will want to get ahead of the game; don’t put things off, thinking that high school is just petty drama. Concern yourself with academics and find motivation to strive. This way, you will save yourself the trouble of worrying about not meeting college requirements and expectations. Be consistent in doing well in school, as well as outside of school. You can try, but you cannot triumph without the “umph”. There isn’t a lot that a person can do about college as senior year comes to a Graduation is in a few weeks, and I have to say, I’ve learned a lot of things in these past four years. Here, I want to share with you the many lessons about education and how to prepare for college. It’s a daunting task, and without help, you are sure to be stressed. These are just what I found to useful in my four years in high school. Lesson 1: Start early. No matter what, you have to begin looking at colleges far before the end of senior year, preferably as early as freshman or sophomore year. You don’t even have to start looking at colleges yet; just know that you have to take school seriously. This is where you have to begin healthy habits that you will carry into college, like disciplining yourself to do your homework, staying away from the television, computer and going out. Instead, volunteer and join clubs, do sports, anything that will reflect leadership and independence. You want to reach the end of your senior year knowing that you’ve done all that you could to prove to colleges that you have a passion for learning and that you have meaning and purpose. 22 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Lesson 3: Apply, apply, apply. It may be tiring, but it’s well worth it. You never know what your chances are until you take them. Even after applying to one college, it doesn’t stop there. There is always a chance of rejection, so you should definitely have a back-up plan. Make sure to apply to more than one school (at least three or four). Even after that, you must apply for scholarships, grants, and FAFSA. There are several sites that can help you, close. You don’t want to be that last minute person, scrambling to get their act together last minute in the hopes to redeem him/ herself. To avoid falling behind, build a strong foundation, and work your way up. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that it’s impossible to climb the mountain that is high school; after you graduate, you will be relieved, and the cycle will start all over again as senior year comes to an end. College Survival Guide! By Ka Zoua Vang, HmoobTeen Editor,18, Minneapolis, MN P erhaps you were the high school class president or a member in the honor society; or perhaps you will be graduating in the top percentile of your class and may even be a valedictorian. Regardless of your high school success or lack of it, the key thing to remember is that the start of college means the start of a clean, new academic slate, independence and critical decision-making phase of your life. The decisions you make and the actions you take during your first year of college will have a major impact on the rest of your college career and your life. The transition from high school to college and how successful it will be or not, will be based not on who you were or what you did in high school, but what you are going to start and continue doing to keep advancing. As I reach the end of my first year in college, I would like to pass down a few tips on how to survive or do well in college. Many of you may have heard these before and if it is one that you’ve heard before, pay particular attention to it because if it’s repetitive, most likely you’ll make the same mistakes. that really helped me get by this was just going to class an hour early regularly to review my notes and catch up on assignments. Different methods work for different people so try a couple of things including, disciplining yourself to study at a quiet library, going to professor’s office hours or even creating a study group with friends. 4 Strive for good grades. While good grades came naturally to me in high school, I finally felt that I had to earn them in college. It required me to be much more dedicated, get tutoring help as much as possible, meet with my professors, and create study groups as well as no procrastinating. The academic coursework in college is definitely much more challenging than in high school because it moves at a fast pace, requires elaborate, higher-level thinking skills and a deeper comprehension level. 1 5 2 6 Get organized. In high school, my teachers guided me through my assignments and set due dates as the class progress. But in college, my professors would post up a fixed schedule of the whole semester with the assignments and due dates and just expect me to be responsible for completing and turning them on time. I had to be quicker and diligent on my time managing and organization skills by actually writing down every due date in my student planner and completing assignments a week ahead. Go to class. Obvious right? But since attendance is not taken in most college classes, skipping a class or two was tempting. I had friends who started skipping a class or two, until it became almost a habit. They would encourage me to skip class with them instead and sometimes there would be things going on campus that I’d rather be doing. But I did not fall into that trap and it saved me a lot of trouble and money, because remember that you pay for your education in college. 3 Make time to study. There were many times when I was tempted to hang out with my friends instead of study for a quiz or I would rather be on face book instead of reading. Making time to study in college is very crucial to do well in your classes. One thing Be prepared to feel overwhelmed. There were many times when I felt like college forgets that students have a life too and that things may happen and come up unexpectedly. I’ve had several family and work issues that came up various times in the year that affected my academic life. Regardless, I didn’t let go of my educational morals and goals. So best be prepared to feel unprepared and even stressed at times, and remember that you’re not the only one feeling that way. Live on campus, but don’t get sidetracked or live at home, but stay involve. I lived at home and I personally thought that it did not alter my college experience in any way other than that I think it would have been a great experience to live on campus in order to really get involved in activities and get the whole college ‘feel’. Living at home really helped me focus on my studies because I am not always hanging out with friends or catching a free movie every other Tuesday night at school. However, living on campus would allow me to get to know and utilize the school and its resources but I would have to work hard to stay focus on my studies. Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 23 Comics By Liang Xiong 24 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Comics Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 25 26 / HmoobTeen Summer 2010 Summer 2010 HmoobTeen / 27 Kaj Siab Songs for Mental Health Wellness is a free compilation album created by Hmong American Partnership with songs by Hmong-Minnesotan artists. The goal of the album is to increase awareness of mental health and promote good mental health in the Hmong community. The entire album can be downloaded at www.hmong.org.
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