Client Workbook

Client
Workbook
SUBI Project Team
Community Head Injury Resource Services of Toronto
Carolyn Lemsky, PhD, CPsych, ABPP/ABCN, Clinical Director
Irene Sullivan, Hon BA, Dip CS, Project Coordinator
Pam Kaufman, SSW, Substance Use Community Facilitator
Kristen Caballaro, Hon BA, Service Coordinator
Center for Addiction and Mental Health
Dennis James, MSc, Deputy Clinical Director, Addictions Program
Jerry Schwlab, RSSW, Manager, Addiction Assessment and Day/Residential Treatment Services
Tim Godden, MSW, RSW, Advanced Practice Clinician
Toronto Acquired Brain Injury Network
Charissa Levy, MHSc, BScOT, Executive Director
Judy Moir, MPA, BA Psych (Hons), Assistant Executive Director
Heather Brien, MBA, BScOT, Executive Director
Writing Heather Chisvin, [email protected]
Design David Wyman, www.wymandesign.ca
Illustration Kathryn Adams, www.kathrynadams.com
Acknowledgements
We would like to thank the staff at CHIRS and the CAMH, Brentcliffe Site, who provided training
for project personnel, and shared their program materials and expertise freely. A special thanks
goes out to Kelly Greer, who generously provided content for the staying healthy chapter and to
Megan Cowley, Trish Dekker, Ann Hilliard, Matthias Kaay, David Law and Helen Vilenski who
reviewed drafts of workbook chapters. Without their support, this workbook could not have
been developed. We would also like to thank John Corrigan for his generous support and
consultation.
Funding for the Substance Use and Brain Injury project (Grant #G03-05465) provided through
the Ontario Ministry of Health and Long-Term Care from Health Canada’s Primary Health Care
Transition Fund.
C
HIRS
The Substance Use / Brain Injury (SUBI) Bridging Project
is a joint effort of the above organizations to provide
education and treatment information on substance use
following a brain injury.
This material is owned by the SUBI project and may be reproduced with proper citation and
without alteration for clinical use only. Expressed permission is required for any other use.
Contents
Introduction
How to use this workbook
Introduction to substance use and acquired brain injury
4
5
7
Section 1 Understanding the addiction cycle
11
13
17
21
31
35
39
43
47
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Getting ready for change
My top 5 reasons for change
The effects of drugs and alcohol
The ABCs of substance use
Thoughts, feelings and substance use
First things first. Ideas to get started
Saying no to alcohol and drugs
Coping with cravings
Section 2 Tools to use during recovery
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Journaling
Being in groups
Setting realistic goals
Section 3 Understanding yourself and your relationships
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Being your own best friend
Building self esteem
Building healthy relationships
Building a support network
Section 4 Coping strategies for life
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Assertiveness
Dealing with boredom
Coping with strong feelings
Relaxation
Problem-solving
Staying healthy
Section 5 Pulling it all together
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Appendix A
Appendix B
51
53
59
69
73
75
79
83
87
91
93
97
101
105
109
115
Goal setting for recovery
Learning from lapses
121
123
129
For more information
Forms for reproduction
135
137
Introduction
This workbook was created for people who are living with the effects of a brain
injury and are also having some problems due to drug or alcohol use.
The workbook was designed by a partnership of people at Community Head
Injury Resource Services of Toronto (CHIRS) and the Centre for Addiction and
Mental Health (CAMH).
The materials presented are based upon the programming provided at CAMH,
Brentcliffe Site.
To get the most out of this workbook we strongly recommend that clients review
it with a counsellor who is familiar with addictions and/or is helping people after
brain injury.
Acquired Brain Injury counsellors using this workbook are encouraged to seek
consultation from professionals with experience in the treatment of substance
abuse.
Counsellors in addictions and substance abuse are encouraged to seek
consultation from professionals with experience in the management of the
effects of acquired brain injury.
4
How to use this workbook
This workbook was put together for three groups of people:
• People living with the effects of brain injury who are having some problems
due to drug or alcohol use
• Counsellors in substance use
• Counsellors in acquired brain injury (ABI)
It can be used as an aid in structuring individual counseling sessions with a client
or as handouts for use in group settings. Each chapter is organized into the
following sections to make the workbook easy to follow:
•
•
•
•
•
Goals
Information
Self-assessment
Worksheet
Plan
We recommend that each individual session or group work follow the structure
suggested by the format of the workbook. Sessions should begin with a review
of the goals, followed by the presentation of information, self assessment and
personal goal-setting. In most chapters, information is brief enough that it can
be reviewed with the client in a single session. However, there are some topic
areas that are more complex and may take several sessions to review.
A recovery checklist is included in the Forms for reproduction section.
Completing this form, or a similar plan at the end of each session, will help to
keep clients focused on their particular goals. Getting in the habit of reviewing
these each week will assist clients in organizing their thoughts, problem-solving,
and follow-through.
A structured self-assessment is provided in most chapters. Worksheets and plans
are provided to assist the client in applying the new information to their own
plan of action.
The order of the chapters provides a logical sequence for the introduction of
information. However, this order can be altered to fit the needs of a particular
client or the structure of the program in which it is being used.
Please note that not all chapters contain all sections. Worksheets can be taken
out of the workbook and used as handouts for groups.
5
This workbook is designed to be a resource for
the following user groups:
• Counsellors with little experience in substance use should find enough
information and examples in each chapter to have meaningful conversations
with their clients about substance use and its effects. However, the workbook
is not intended to be a replacement for consultation with counsellors in
substance abuse.
• Counsellors with little experience in acquired brain injury should find that the
structured, written presentation and concrete examples will help clients to
compensate for memory impairments and other cognitive difficulties.
However, consultation with an acquired brain injury professional is strongly
recommended.
• The multiple choice and checklist format of self-assessments is designed to
facilitate self-assessment for persons whose cognitive difficulties make
answering open-ended questions difficult.
6
Introduction to
substance use and
acquired brain injury
Is my substance use really a problem?
This is a very difficult question to answer, particularly for a person who has had a
brain injury. After reviewing the available information about the effects of
alcohol and brain injury we have concluded that it is not safe to use alcohol in
any amount after brain injury. Having said that, the usual recommended limits
for safe use of alcohol for those under the age of 65 are two drinks in a day for
men and one drink per day for women. The difference between men and
woman is based on size and the ability of the body to process the alcohol.
There are many reasons why it is generally considered unsafe to use illegal drugs.
There is a risk of getting arrested — people who sell drugs are not regulated by
law, so people who buy them are at risk for being the victims of crime. Some
illegal drugs pose a great risk of causing further brain injury as well. Taking more
of your prescription drugs than your doctor prescribes is also dangerous. Medical
complications, including further brain injury, can result.
If you have had a brain injury, it is not safe to drink alcohol in any amount, it is
not safe to use illegal drugs, and it is not safe to take more than the prescribed
dose of your medications.
Here are some signs that it might be time to ask for help —
do any of these signs apply to you?
❑ You have tried to cut back or stop using substances on your own but
somehow you keep on using
❑ Someone around you is very worried about your use of alcohol or drugs
❑ You worry about your use of alcohol or drugs
❑ You have had legal, financial or relationship problems that are related to
your use of alcohol or drugs
There are a lot of good reasons for avoiding the use of drugs and alcohol after a brain
injury. A helpful resource is: User’s manual for faster, more reliable operation of a
brain after injury (Ohio Valley Center, 1994; www.ohiovalley.org)
7
Eight reasons not to use
Here are the eight reasons that the Ohio Valley Center gives
for not using drugs or alcohol after a brain injury:
1
People who use alcohol or other drugs after their injury do not
recover as well as those who do not. After brain injury some brain cells
(neurons) are killed. Sometimes connections between neurons are disrupted as
well. Recovery is the process of rebuilding connections between brain cells.
Unfortunately, the body cannot make new brain cells. Most often being
intoxicated (drunk) means that the functioning of your brain cells has been
disrupted. This makes it more difficult to recover from your injury.
2
Problems with balance, walking and talking are made worse by
alcohol and drugs. Alcohol and drugs can cause falls and/or difficulty in
speaking, even in those without brain injury. After a brain injury, problems with
balance and speech caused by the injury itself can make these problems worse.
3
People who have had a brain injury sometimes say and do things
without thinking them through. This problem is made worse by drugs
and alcohol. One of the functions of your brain is to stop you from acting on
bad ideas. That function is turned off when you are using. This can result in
doing and saying things that you regret later.
4 Brain injuries can make it more difficult to pay attention, remember
new information and think things through clearly. Drugs and alcohol
interfere with all of these mental abilities. Many people find that after their
brain injury they have to relearn some of the skills they once had. It is common
to have problems finding the right word, concentrating, solving problems and
making use of other thinking skills. Adding alcohol and drugs to these problems
makes it even harder to get things done.
5 After a person has had a brain injury, they generally find that alcohol
and other drugs have a more powerful effect. After a brain injury, the brain
is more sensitive to alcohol and drugs. No matter what a person’s ability to
handle alcohol and drugs was before their injury, it is reduced after injury. Also,
alcohol and drugs can interfere with any prescribed medications.
8
6
After a brain injury it is common to have times when a person feels
down or depressed. Drinking and using drugs can make depression
worse. After a brain injury there are a lot of changes and challenges that make
life more difficult. That can be a cause for feeling down. Also, the effects of a
brain injury itself can cause a depressed mood. That may be one reason why
some people turn to alcohol or drugs to feel relaxed and happier. That may be
true in the short run. In the long run, though, things usually get worse. Alcohol
acts as a depressant in the brain. That will make you more depressed.
7
Drinking and using drugs can increase the likelihood of having a
seizure. About 5% of people with a brain injury go on to have trouble with
seizures. Seizures are serious and can cause further brain damage or injury. That
is why doctors take great care to help their patients prevent having seizures.
Many people are prescribed drugs to prevent seizures after they have had a brain
injury. It is very dangerous to mix alcohol and other drugs with these
medications. Taking yourself off prescribed drugs so that you can drink is also
very dangerous. Talk to your doctor and get the facts.
8
Using drugs or alcohol after a brain injury increases your risk of
having another brain injury. After you’ve had one injury, your chances of
having another brain injury are three times greater. Brain injuries can cause
people to have more accidents because of changes in their balance, coordination
and judgment. Alcohol and drugs only make these difficulties worse.
Congratulations on having made the decision to seek more
information on the effect of substance use on acquired brain injury.
By going through the information in this workbook you will learn to understand
more about your substance use. You will also find coping strategies to help you
manage the difficulties that may arise during your recovery and you will find
information about how to pursue a healthy lifestyle. Remember that one book
will not give you all the answers — it is very important to find people whom you
trust to help you.
9
Section 1
Understanding
the addiction cycle
11
Chapter 1
Getting ready for change
Goals
• To learn that the good things
associated with substance
use may come quick and
easy, but they don’t last long
• To learn that the problems that come
from using drugs or alcohol last a long time
Information
The first step in your recovery is to understand why you use drugs or alcohol and your reasons for
wanting to make a change
Self-assessment
Check any or all of these short-term benefits of drinking or drug use that apply to you:
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Instant gratification (feeling good right away)
Helps me get to sleep
Helps me deal with pain
Helps me deal with stress
Puts off having to deal with something that I don’t want to think about
Makes me numb (helps me to stop having feelings)
Gives me something to do when I feel lonely
Helps me to socialize
Helps me to relax
Gives me a sense of courage
Helps me to have fun and lifts my spirits
Helps me feel normal, like one of the group
Gives me something to do when I feel bored
Helps me feel less depressed
Helps me loosen up and be more exciting
Other short-term benefits:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
13
Lasting effects of drug use
Here are some problems that come from drinking or drug use. Notice that the effects tend to last
a long time. Check any or all of these long-term effects you might have experienced:
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Forgot what happened
Fell or got in an accident
Did something unsafe or illegal
Lost money
Argued with my family
Argued with my friends
Had problems with my health
Had problems with the law
Lost my house/apartment
Hurt someone I care about
Did something that was against my own values
Lost control of my temper
Damaged my reputation
Got kicked out of a rehabilitation program
Had trouble keeping doctor or therapy appointments
Was not getting the most out of my rehab
Felt badly about myself (damaged my self-esteem)
Found that my problems were still there when I sobered up
Other long-term effects:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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14
Worksheet, Chapter 1
Getting ready for change
Now that you’ve had a chance to examine some of the pros and cons of your drinking or drug
use, you might find it helpful to complete this chart. You may want to come back to it from time
to time as you learn more about yourself.
Drinking or drug use
What’s good about it
What’s not good about it
____________________________________________________
____________________________________________________
____________________________________________________
____________________________________________________
____________________________________________________
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15
Chapter 2
My top 5 reasons for change
Goals
• To understand how important motivation
is to making a change
• To define your motivation for wanting
to make a change
• To have your motivations handy during
the tough times
Information
Making changes in your life is a real challenge
and it helps to have a clear idea of why you
want to make a change and what might help
keep you motivated during the rough times.
Some reasons for making a change might include:
•
•
•
•
Relationships that are important to you
Goals you want to reach
Ways your health might improve
Activities you want to pursue
17
Worksheet, Chapter 2
My top 5 reasons for change
I want to make a change for the following reasons:
1
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
3
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
4
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5
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Plan
There are a lot of ways that you can put your list to use.
Check any or all of these ideas that you think might work for you:
❑ Write your list on a card and keep it with you
❑ Share your list with a supportive person so that they can encourage you
❑ Write a poem or a jingle you can say or sing to yourself
❑ Keep a journal with pictures to keep you inspired (see Chapter 9, page 53)
❑ Make a poster and hang it in a place that you will see each day
❑ If your list involves people who are important to you, use their pictures or something they have
given you to remind yourself of what you are working for
❑ Plan to call or talk to five people to tell them about your reasons for making a change
Add these things to your Coping Card (see Chapter 8, page 47).
19
Chapter 3
The effects of drugs and alcohol
Goals
• To learn about how drugs and alcohol change
the normal functioning of the brain and body
• To understand the health effects of using
substances
Information
Why it feels like you can’t live without drugs or alcohol
Our brains are wired so that when we do something that gives us pleasure, we tend to want to
do it again. That’s what drives us to do things that help us survive — eating, for example.
Almost all drugs that are used to get high change how the natural chemicals work in the brain’s
pleasure centre. This change tricks you into thinking that the drug is something you need for
survival. Often, the changes in brain chemistry that drugs cause last longer than the high. That
can cause serious long-term problems, including withdrawal symptoms and brain damage.
REWARD CIRCUIT
This is a picture of the reward circuit in the
brain. The most important thing to notice
Pre-frontal
cortex
is that the reward circuit has strong
reasoning
connections to the part of your brain that
and planning
is responsible for basic emotions (the
nucleus accumbens) and the part of your
Nucleus
Ventral
accumbens
brain that regulates basic body functions
tegmental
basic
area
(the ventral tegmental area). One of the
emotions
basic body
reasons that addictive drugs have such a
functions
strong effect is that they act on the part of
the brain that is in charge of very basic
survival instincts. When the urge to use the
drug is strong enough, this part of the
brain can override the part of the brain in charge of reasoning and planning (pre-frontal cortex).
This is one reason why most drugs make the problem of being impulsive — acting without
thinking — worse. This is also why people spend a lot of time and energy getting the drug they
abuse for a short-term high, even though it causes a lot of problems in the long run.
21
What drugs and alcohol do to your body
Stimulants speed up bodily functions. Depressants slow the body down. Some drugs cause you to
see and feel things that are not really there — but the effects of drugs don’t stop there. As you
read through the information on the following chart, you will see that although drugs may have
one or two effects that make you feel good, they also cause many problems. Because of the way
drugs work on the brain, you may focus on the one or two positive effects, without stopping to
think about all of the problems. Sometimes the problems last much longer than the effect of the
substance itself. This causes damage to the body and brain that may be permanent. Many drugs,
and alcohol, have been shown to have long-term health effects that include liver damage, an
increased risk for getting cancer, heart disease and brain damage.
This table show the effects of some common drugs. It is important to notice that all drugs listed
make some of the problems that come with brain injury even worse.
Cannabinoids
Name
Common names
What they do
Problems they cause
Marijuana
Hash
blunt
dope
grass
joints
pot
hash
hemp
Imitates a pleasure
chemical in the brain
Slow thinking
Apathy
(loss of motivation)
Poor balance
Poor coordination
Poor memory
Poor learning
Anxiety
Panic attacks
Fast heart rate
Cough
Active Ingredient:
Tetrahydrocannabinol
(THC)
Increased risk for
psychotic episode
22
Depressants
Name
Common names
What they do
Problems they cause
Barbiturates
(e.g., Amytal,
Phenobarbital)
downers
reds
red birds
phennies
yellows
yellow jackets
Reduce anxiety
Impulsive behaviour
Poor concentration
Fatigue
Confusion
Poor judgment
Slurred speech
Dizziness
Feeling of well-being
Lower blood pressure
Lower pulse
Benzodiazepines
(e.g., Ativan, Halcion,
Xanax)
candy
downers
sleeping pills
tranks
Cause drowsiness
Interferes with memory
storage (blackouts)
For Barbiturates:
Medically dangerous
withdrawal
Death with overdose
Alcohol
(Spirits, beer, wine)
Feeling of well-being
Deaden pain
Reduce social anxiety
Impulsive behaviour
Poor concentration
Fatigue
Poor balance
Poor coordination
Confusion
Poor memory
Poor judgment
Slurred speech
Shrinks brain
Liver damage
Heart damage
Birth defects
Seizures
Medically dangerous
withdrawal
Death with overdose
23
Depressants
(continued)
Name
Common names
What they do
Problems they cause
GHB
Gamma-hydroxy
butyrate
Georgia home boy
liquid ecstasy
Feeling of well-being
Impulsive behaviour
Poor concentration
Fatigue
Confusion
Poor memory
Poor judgment
Nausea/vomiting
Headache
Seizures
Coma
Death
Opioids (opiates)
Name
Common names
What they do
Problems they cause
Tylenol with
codeine
Cough syrup with
codeine
Fentanyl (duragesic)
Talwin
cody
schoolboy
Pain relief
Drowsiness/nausea
Constipation
Slows breathing
Stoppage of breathing
Coma
Death
Feeling of well-being
Oxycodone/Vicodin
Oxycontin
TNT
tango
cash
Morphine
monkey
Ms. Emma
Opium
block
gum
hop
Heroin
H
dope,
horse
junk,
smack
24
For Oxycodone/Vicodin
and Oxycontin:
Severe withdrawal that
includes the above and
diarrhea and nausea
For Heroin:
Staggering gait
HIV risk
Hepatitis risk
Stimulants
Name
Common names
What they do
Problems they cause
Amphetamine
speed
bennies
black beauties
crosses
hearts
Feeling of increased
energy
Fast, irregular heart beat
Poor appetite
Weight loss
Heart failure
Nervousness
Trouble sleeping
Tremors
Loss of coordination
Aggression
Impulsive behaviour
Confusion
Poor coordination
Psychosis
Mental alertness
Cocaine
blow
candy
Charlie
coke
flake
rock
snow
toot
Increased body temperature
Stroke
Seizures
Headache
Panic attack
Paranoia
Methamphetamine
meth
chalk
crank
crystal
fire
glass
go fast
speed
Aggressive behaviour
Violence
Psychotic behaviour
Memory loss
Impaired memory
Impaired learning
Shrinkage of brain
Paranoia
MDMA
(methylenedioxy
methamphetamine)
ecstasy
adam
clarity
Lover’s speed
peace
For MDMA:
Feeling of wellbeing and empathy
Mild hallucinations
Increased sensitivity
to touch
Poor memory
Poor learning
Increased body temperature
Heart damage
Kidney failure
Liver damage
25
Hallucinogens
Name
Common names
What they do
Problems they cause
LSD
acid
blotter
boomers
cubes
microdot
Change in thinking
and perception
Nausea
Flashbacks
Increased body temperature
Fast heart rate
Poor appetite
Trouble sleeping
Weakness
Tremors
Mescaline
buttons
cactus,
mesc
payote
Changes in thinking may
continue after the drug has
worn off
Psilocybin
magic mushroom
purple passion
shrooms
For Psilocybin: Anxiety
26
Other drugs
Name
Common names
What they do
Problems they cause
PCP
(Phencyclidine)
angel dust
boat
hog
love boat
peace pill
Numbness
Fast heart rate
High blood pressure
Poor coordination
Memory loss
Nausea
Vomiting
laughing gas
snappers,
poppers
Head rush
Inhalants
e.g.:
Solvents
paint thinners
gasses
glue
nitrites
Change in
perception
Sudden
stimulation of
senses
Impulsive behaviour, Headache,
Nausea, Vomiting, Slurred speech,
Poor memory, Wheezing,
Unconsciousness, Weight loss,
Depression, Muscle weakness,
Liver damage, Brain damage,
Sudden death
Use associated with suicide
Steroids
(anabolic
steroids)
e.g.:
Androl
oxandrin
winstrol
testosterone
roids
Arnolds
gym candy
pumpers
stackers
weight trainers
juice
Imitates the
effects of male
hormones
Taken to
increase muscle
mass/strength
Increased risk of stroke and heart and
liver disease
Increased risk of infection
Aching joints
Nervousness
Trembling
Increased anger/rage attacks
For men: Baldness, development of
breasts, inability to get an erection
For women: Facial hair, deepened
voice, reduction in breast size
Changes in appearance including:
Acne, Oily hair, Baldness, Jaundice
Swelling of feet and ankles, Bad
breath, Mood swings
Health risks associated with injection
include HIV and hepatitis
27
Self-assessment
Consider your Health
What substance(s) have you used or abused?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What effects did the substance have on you?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What health problems has your substance use caused?
Check any or all effects you have experienced:
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Aggression
Blackout/memory loss
Coughing, wheezing or other lung problems
Confusion — disorganized thinking
Fatigue
Forgetting to eat/losing weight
Hangover
Headache
Heart problems
Kidney problems
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Nausea
Over eating
Panic attacks
Poor balance
Poor judgment — did something I regretted later
Poor co-ordination
Poor memory for new information
Tremors
Trouble sleeping
Vomiting
Other effects:
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Which health problems worry you?
What do you want to prevent by stopping your use of alcohol and drugs?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
29
Chapter 4
The ABCs of substance use
Goals
• To learn about triggers for
alcohol or substance use
• To identify some triggers for
alcohol and drug use
• To identify what coping skills
will help deal with triggers
Information
What purpose does substance use serve in your life?
Your use of alcohol or drugs serves some purpose or function in your life. In the last
chapter you learned that there are some short-term benefits that come from your
drinking or drug use. This chapter will help you understand why you want to drink or
use drugs, what happens to you afterwards and how to make a plan to avoid drugs
and alcohol.
The ABCs of substance use
Antecedents
The things that come before you drink or use drugs. Another name for
antecedents is triggers. Triggers for some people can be thoughts, or things in
the environment, or emotions.
Behaviour
What happens when you drink or use drugs. This includes your choice of drug or
alcohol, how much you use or consume and what you are doing while you are using.
Consequences
What happens after you have used alcohol or drugs. These can be physical,
emotional or social effects of your use. Consequences can be both positive and
negative. A positive consequence could be an escape from worries. A negative
consequence could be a hangover and a missed appointment.
31
Self-assessment
Here are some common triggers. Check any that might apply to you.
Having strong uncomfortable emotions
❑ Sadness
❑ Anger
❑ Loneliness
❑ Frustration
❑ Anxiety
❑ Boredom
Dealing with physical discomfort
❑ Pain
❑ Symptoms of withdrawal
❑ Fatigue
❑ Illness/nausea
Having an urge or a craving
❑ Thinking about the alcohol or drug
❑ Seeing the alcohol or drug
❑ When I’m with others who are drinking or using drugs
❑ When others ask me or pressure me to drink or use drugs
❑ When I want to test my ability to control my use (I think I know when to stop)
To make a good time feel better
❑ To enjoy a special event more
❑ To enjoy being with my friends
❑ While I’m relaxing
❑ To reward myself
When I have problems in my relationships
❑ With my parents
❑ With my loved ones
❑ With my neighbours
❑ With my co-workers
If you stop to think about your patterns of behaviour, you might notice that there are
some situations in which you are more likely to use drugs or alcohol. Here are some
common examples. Check off any that apply to you:
❑ Getting paid (having money with me)
❑ Being in a certain neighbourhood
❑ After work or an appointment
❑ At the end of the day
❑ On weekends
❑ On days I don’t go to work/therapy
❑ Seeing or using paraphernalia (pipes, spoons, needles, bottles/glasses)
❑ Seeing friends and associates who use
❑ Intimate relationships (going on dates)
Other situations:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
32
Worksheet, Chapter 4
The ABCs of substance use
Use this table to help you keep track of your ABCs. Doing this will also help you learn more about
your substance use. We have given you one example to help you get started.
Antecedents/triggers Behaviour
(What came before you
drank or used drugs)
(What you did)
Consequences
Got my cheque.
Went into bar and had four
beers.
Police were called.
Started thinking about how
much my life has changed
since my injury.
Got into an argument.
(What happened afterward)
Tripped and hurt my knee.
Spent all my money. Feel
guilty.
33
Plan
Once you have a clear idea of what factors lead to your drinking or drug use you can begin to
plan ahead. If strong feelings come up, then you might need to learn some stress management
strategies to handle them. These might include exercise, relaxation strategies and learning how to
think differently about what you find distressing. If you’re feeling bored, you may need to find
meaningful ways to spend your time. If you’re feeling lonely, building a support network might
help. If you’re tired, eating better and learning how to get a proper night’s sleep can help with
fatigue. The idea is to do what you can to avoid triggers or situations that make you want to use
substances
Talk with someone you trust for ideas that might help with your recovery.
Check any coping skills that you want to learn:
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Learn ways to handle anger
❑
Learn ways to handle stress
❑
Learn ways to handle anxiety
❑
Get more exercise
❑
Eat better
❑
Develop better sleep routines
❑
Have more meaningful/fun ways to spend time
Develop routines that help get things done
Learn how to think through problems
Learn how to be less impulsive
Learn ways to get support from others
Get help managing money
Find a sponsor/mentor
❑ Other ideas:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Now that you have identified which coping skills you think would work for you, number
them in order of importance. Put a 1 next to the skill you’d like to start working on first, and so
on. You and your counsellor can use this information to set goals for your recovery.
Make a plan to get started. Work with your counsellor to select a goal that can be completed in
the next week or two. If feelings of anxiety are a problem, you might set a goal to read Chapter
19 (see page 105). If you’re feeling lonely or bored, plan something that will give you a chance to
be with people in an environment that will not encourage you to drink or use drugs.
This week I will:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
34
Chapter 5
Thoughts, feelings and substance use
Goals
• To understand the link between
thoughts, feelings and addiction
• To begin to identify the thoughts
and feelings that are associated
with addiction
• To identify coping strategies that
will help in any situation
Information
Substance use becomes an addiction when a person goes from social use to needing a drug.
Remember that drugs and alcohol trick the brain into thinking that they are something that is
needed for survival. People who are addicted believe that they need the drug, or alcohol, to feel
well emotionally and physically. They also continue to use to prevent symptoms of withdrawal (the
shakes, anxiety, etc.). The feelings that are caused by addiction and that keep addiction going are
very strong. They may override your sense of reason and make you do things that you would not
do for any other reason. Stopping the use of drugs and alcohol is only one part of the problem. A
person with an addiction must deal with the thoughts and feelings that make them want the
drugs or alcohol in the first place.
The Alcoholics Anonymous program makes use of the word HALT as a way to remember how
important it is to stop and think about how they are feeling.
Hungry Angry Lonely Tired
35
Self-assessment
When a person is using substances they often get into the habit of thinking in ways that keep
them stuck in their situation. This is known as stinky thinking. Often those addicted to substances
have had to lie or cover up so much that they have forgotten how to be honest with themselves.
Which kinds of stinky thinking
have you noticed in yourself?
❑ Entitlement
I deserve it! I worked hard all week
❑ Lying
I used to have a problem but I don’t anymore.
❑ Victim stance
I’ve had a lot of frustration in my life. That’s why I drink.
❑ Grandiosity
I’m OK…I’m in control.
❑ Hop over
It’s alright, today won’t count.
❑ Boredom
It’s Saturday on a long weekend and I have nothing to do.
36
Worksheet, Chapter 5
Thoughts, feelings and substance use
Which of these examples of healthy thinking might help you stay on track?
Check any that apply and add some of your own.
❑ The best way to reward myself is being substance free.
❑ If I take it one day at a time, I can do this.
❑ Everyday is important. Today counts.
Other examples of healthy thinking:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Later in the workbook you will learn more about healthy ways to deal with strong feelings.
37
Chapter 6
First things first. Ideas to get started
Goals
• To make a list of things to do to help get started
• To make a list of early coping strategies
Information
Once you decide to make a big change in your
life, it can then be hard to figure out how to start.
Here are some ideas of things that you can do to
support your new lifestyle:
1
Throw out all alcohol and drugs and anything that goes with them such as pipes, etc.
2
Stop seeing or talking to the heavy drinkers and drug users you know
3
Do what you can to avoid being around people who drink or use drugs
4
Change your phone number
5
Throw out the contact information of dealers or people who drink heavily
6
Try new activities that are drug-free
7
Try a self-help group such as Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous
8
Talk to people you trust about difficult situations
9
Tell people who can and will help you quit drinking or using drugs what you are doing,
let them know what they can do to help
10
Have your money deposited directly in your bank or get help to manage your money
39
Plan
Here is a plan to help you get started on the road to avoiding drugs and alcohol.
Fill in the blanks:
On (date)__________________________________________________I will get rid of the following items:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I will avoid the following people:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I will avoid those people by doing the following things:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Here is what I will say if I do have to speak to those people:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I will not go these places:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
40
Doing these things will make it easier to avoid those places:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
These are people who I can count on to help me:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Here are the things they can do to help me:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
These are things that I can do that will be safe and healthy:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
These are places I can go that will help me avoid using drugs or alcohol:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
41
Chapter 7
Saying no to alcohol and drugs
Goals
• To learn how to say no to drugs and alcohol
• To practice using Top 5 Motivators
to keep on track
Information
If someone is too interested
in what’s in your glass, it’s their problem, not yours.
When you decide to stop using alcohol or drugs, one of the most difficult situations you will come
across is having people offer you a drink or drugs. Some people will encourage you to drink or use
drugs even if they know that you are trying to make a change. (There are more ideas for being
assertive in Chapter 16, see page 93.)
It is more common than you might think for people who do not have brain injury and who are not
fighting substance use to choose not to drink on any given occasion. You may feel self-conscious
but you do not have to explain why you are saying no. Try to remember that for other people it is
no big deal, and no one will think it is out of the ordinary if you refuse.
Some tips
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Look the person in the eye, so they know you mean what you are saying
Say no thanks right away without offering an explanation
If you don’t get into a conversation about your decision, the conversation will end more quickly
If the person offers again, say no again and ask the person to stop offering/asking
Suggest something else to do or ask for something else to eat or drink
Change the subject
Leave the situation if you feel uncomfortable
Remember it’s your choice—you don’t have to explain your reasons
Use your Top 5 Motivators card to remind you why you are not using drugs or alcohol
Feel proud of your choice.
43
Plan
Use this worksheet to plan ahead for the times you will find yourself in situations that you
might find hard to handle. We have given you a few examples, now fill in situations that you
think you might face, and solutions to those situations.
Who will ask or offer
Where and when
Who/what can help
My cousin Frank
At a family party
My brother
What I can say and do
I’ll tell Frank that I’d rather have a Coke, I’ll go get a Coke.
Ask my brother to hang out with me for a while
Take a walk away from the party
Look at my Top 5 Motivators card
Who will ask or offer
Where and when
Who/what can help
My friend Marty
Phone call to my house
Answering machine
Prompting notes by
telephone or counsellor
What I can say and do
Make sure I have my top 5 reasons card
I’ll keep a script by the phone to remind me of what I want to say: for example –
I don’t want to party with you, I’m done with that, please stop asking.
I’ll keep saying: No thanks. Please stop asking.
He asks for reasons, I tell him: my mind is made up, I don’t want to do that
I’ll end the phone call
I’ll screen phone calls
44
Who will ask or offer
Where and when
Who/what can help
Where and when
Who/what can help
Where and when
Who/what can help
What I can say and do
Who will ask or offer
What I can say and do
Who will ask or offer
What I can say and do
45
Chapter 8
Coping with cravings
Goals
• To learn about cravings
• To develop coping strategies
for cravings
Information
How do you know when you’re having a craving?
Everyone who quits drinking or using drugs has cravings. A craving is the feeling
that you want to get high. Sometimes the feelings are very strong and it is hard to
think about anything else. Sometimes the feelings are weak and you can easily get
your mind onto something else. You know you are having a craving when:
• You think about wanting to use drugs or alcohol
• You have some physical sensations, like a knot in your stomach or tension
• You find yourself thinking about how to get alcohol or drugs
The good news is that you don’t have to drink or use drugs when you have a
craving. You will have more control than you realize you are capable of over what
you think and how you feel if you learn to stop and think.
Once you have started to pay attention to what you are thinking, find a way to be
your own best coach. This won’t be easy at first, but with practice it will get easier.
Here are a few useful thoughts that you can review when you feel a craving:
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
It’s normal to have cravings, it does not mean that I am not getting better
Cravings don’t last forever, they go away whether or not I get high
The longer I do not drink or use drugs the weaker the cravings get
The longer I do not drink or use drugs, the fewer cravings I will have
Cravings may be uncomfortable, but they won’t hurt me
I’ve been doing well
I’ve worked hard, I don’t want to spoil it now
I can do this
47
Self-assessment
Stop and think
When you recognize the thoughts or feelings that go with a craving, stop and review this list of
ideas. This will help you fight the craving. Check any or all you think you might work for you:
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Keep a picture of a stop sign in my wallet or purse or somewhere I will see it often
Wear a rubber band around my wrist and snap it to stop the thoughts
Review my reasons for avoiding drugs and alcohol
Practice breathing or relaxation or meditation
Distract myself with something interesting or fun
Find a book, a song, a poem, a prayer or a picture of a person or place that gives me
a feeling of hope and strength
Have something to eat
Listen to music
Talk to someone I trust
Write in my journal (see Chapter 9, page 53)
Leave the situation or do something to change it
Read my journal or workbook
Pat myself on the back
Make a list of my accomplishments
Make a tape with a pep talk that I can play when I need it
Plan
Having a plan to cope with cravings will help. Practicing your plan before you need it will make it
work even better. One way to get some good ideas about what to do is to think about a time
when you didn’t have a craving. What were you doing? Where were you? Who were you with?
Use the following Coping Card of ideas to make your plan.
✄
Coping Card (Tape quarter for phone call and/or subway token on back)
Top 5 reasons for change
Emergency Plan
1___________________________________ 1 Leave the situation
2___________________________________ 2 Go somewhere safe such as
3___________________________________
________________________________
4___________________________________ 3 Take a few deep breaths
5___________________________________
and try to relax.
Call________________________________ Phone__________________________
Call________________________________ Phone__________________________
Call________________________________ Phone__________________________
49
Section 2
Tools to use
during recovery
51
Chapter 9
Journaling
Goals
• To learn how to keep a journal or diary
• To learn how keeping a journal can help with recovery
Information
Being in recovery is a very busy time. You are
learning a lot about yourself, your body and
your thoughts and feelings. It’s hard to keep it
all straight. Having a record can help you to sort out your thoughts and remember what
happened. It can also help you to keep track of the changes you are making. Journals don’t have
to always be words on paper. They can be artwork, a collection of pictures or images, tape
recordings — anything that helps to remind you of important thoughts.
Here are some things to keep in mind that will make journaling easier:
• Focus on the good things that are happening
• Don’t worry about grammar or spelling, it’s your record!
• Write in point form
• Silence your inner critic
• Try drawings or diagrams — whatever works
• Write first thing in the morning to calm a cluttered mind
Self-assessment
How a keeping a journal can help:
What might keep you from journaling?
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Keep track of my thoughts and feelings
Remember information
Think through problems
See my progress
Remember what I’ve done well
Keep track of ways to improve
Too busy
Nervous about seeing a blank page
Reading problems
Writing problems
Don’t see a benefit in it
Sometimes I don’t like what I wrote
I don’t want a written record
Fear
Forget to make a note — don’t think of it
Don’t know what to write
Worried that someone else will find and read it
53
Worksheet, Chapter 9
Journaling
Ways to make keeping a journal easier
Check the ones that might work for you:
•
•
•
•
•
You and your counsellor can make notes together
Use a tape recorder and say a few sentences each day
Plan to write in your journal at the same time each day
Use music to help you relax and stimulate creativity
Make copies of the form on the next page and use it daily
You might want to cut out the next page and ask your counsellor to photocopy
enough copies for a week to get you started. Put them in a binder and have a special
spot at home to keep the binder.
These are some suggestions for how to set up your daily journal and how it could
work for you. Don’t think too hard about it, even a few thoughts a day will help.
You can write more on the back of the page if you have more to say.
Remember that it is for your eyes only. You don’t have to share it with anyone.
55
Daily Journal
Date: _________________________________________________________________
Today I… (List your main activities)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I made a step toward recovery by…
(Don’t worry if it seems small. Was there a coping skill you learned or tried, something you learned about yourself?)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I’ve been thinking about…
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Questions or things I want to remember to do…
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
57
Chapter 10
Being in groups
Goals
• To get information about
being in therapy groups
• To identify the coping strategies needed
to make being in a group easier
• To learn how peer support can help to reach goals
Information
Here are some ways of feeling more comfortable
If you have never attended group therapy before it can be a scary experience.
Everyone feels uncomfortable at first. When you go to a group for the first time
it is a good idea to make sure you have some basic information. Try to find out:
•
•
•
•
•
•
Who is the group leader?
What do people talk about?
How long does the group last?
How do they take turns talking? (Do they raise hands, or is it more like a conversation?)
What does everyone in the group have in common? Why are they all there?
Does the group have any special rules?
59
Most groups have some rules.
These can include:
Confidentiality
What happens in a group session is the private business of the people in the group. It isn’t
polite to talk outside the group about the people and what happens. They should show
you the same respect. If you are thinking about what happened in a group and want to talk
it through and you are not sure who to talk to about it, ask a program staff member or
your counsellor. When in doubt, leave names out.
Show respect
Avoid the ‘isms’ like racism and sexism.
Be caring and empathetic
Try to see things from the other person’s point of view. Put yourself in their shoes.
Start your sentences with the word “I”
For example, “I worry about…” Hearing about your experiences helps others, and helps
them to feel at ease.
Be honest
That means telling the truth and trying to share your honest feelings.
Only one person talks at a time
Don’t start side conversations.
Be a good listener
Making eye contact and nodding let a person know that you’re still paying attention.
Ask for clarification
If you’re not sure what someone means, ask.
Think about giving everyone a chance to talk
Try to keep your remarks to the point.
Avoid giving advice
Don’t offer your opinion unless someone asks you what you would do.
Don’t force your point of view on others
Arguing doesn’t help.
Learn how to be positive when you’re giving feedback to others
Think about how you would like to have others treat you. Blaming and shaming don’t help.
60
Frequently asked questions about groups
What should you do if you have trouble paying attention,
understanding what people are saying or you get too tired?
Let the leader of the group know before the session that attention and
fatigue are a problem for you. Make a plan to get feedback. You could
sit near the leader who can signal you if you seem to be drifting off, or
you can signal the leader if you’re feeling lost. In some cases it may be
a good idea to admit your difficulty to the group and ask for their
support. With notice, the group and the leader might agree that it is
okay if you leave the room quietly for a little break to wake up. The
main idea is to admit the problem and make a plan to manage it. Let
the leader know that you will leave the room and where you will go.
What should I do if I get angry in the group?
The big advantage of group therapy is that everyone is there to learn
with and from each other. There are bound to be people who you
enjoy spending time with and others who are harder for you to get
along with. If you know that this is a problem for you, make a plan
with the group leader. Some ideas include letting the leader know that
you will leave the room, where you will go, and how or when to talk
about it later. And of course, you can work on your anger
management outside of the group (see Chapter16, page 93).
Sometimes I say things without thinking or I talk off topic.
What can I do to prevent problems?
Let the group know that this is something that you are working on.
Ask for their feedback. It can help to write out or plan comments
before you make them. That will force you to edit. It may be possible
to work on this in group. Be sure to talk about using this strategy first,
so no one will question why you are writing during the group.
It’s rude to interrupt, but sometimes I forget what I wanted to
say while someone else is talking.
This is another time when writing notes may be a good idea. Again, let
your leader or the group know why you are writing. If you have
trouble thinking when you’re on the spot, you can prepare some
things to say before the group starts. Make a note of what you want
to bring up. It never hurts to make a plan and ask for support.
61
Worksheet/plan, Chapter 10
Being in groups
If you do a little bit of homework before you begin you
will be relaxed and gain more from your group sessions.
What should I let the group leader know about me?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
How should I say it?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What coping strategies might be useful?
Check the ones you think you can use:
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Get there a little early
Sit near the front
Arrange a scheduled break with the leader
Ask to have distractions removed
Turn off my cell phone
Ask the group leader to make a cue card with that day’s topic and put it somewhere
I can see it
❑ Make my own a cue card with the topic of the group to help me stay on topic
63
More Information
Self-help groups and
12-step programs
What are they?
A model for self-help groups originated with
Alcoholics Anonymous. The goal of membership
is to provide the social support needed to remain
abstinent from drugs and alcohol — to stop
drinking and to stop using drugs.
Who runs them?
Local chapters of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), Narcotics
Anonymous (NA) and Cocaine Anonymous (CA) are led by
people who have been successful in not using drugs or
alcohol. Each of these groups is an independent organization,
but all use the same model. National and local chapters
provide support and literature. There is no charge to attend.
Who attends?
People who are willing to consider that their substance use is
problematic.
Basic concepts of 12-step groups
• By following the 12 steps, you learn to take responsibility
for your drinking or drug use, and how to change what
you are doing
• Substance abuse is a disease that gets worse if you don’t
do anything about it
• The only way to get better is to stop using drugs or to
stop drinking
• You stop using drugs or alcohol one day at a time
• The concept of spiritual life is discussed, but no particular
religion is promoted
65
Frequently asked questions about AA, NA and CA
What are the 12 steps?
1 Admit that if you drink and/or use drugs your life will be out of control.
Admit that the use of substances after having had a brain injury will make
your life unmanageable.
2
Start to believe that someone can help you put your life in order.
This someone could be God, an AA group, counsellor, sponsor, etc.
3
Decide to get help from others or God. Open yourself up to change.
4
Make a complete list of your past negative behaviours and any current
behaviour problems that you would like to change. Also make a list of your
positive behaviours.
5
Meet with someone you trust and discuss what you wrote in Step 4.
6
Become ready to sincerely try to change your negative behaviours.
7
Ask God for the strength to be a responsible person with responsible
behaviours.
8
Make a list of people your negative behaviours have affected.
Be ready to apologize or make things right with them.
9
Contact these people, apologize and make things right.
10
Continue to check yourself and your behaviours daily. Correct negative
behaviours and improve them. If you hurt another person, apologize and
make corrections.
11
Stop several times each day to think about how you are behaving. Are your
behaviours positive? Are you being responsible? If not, ask for help.
Reward yourself when you are able to behave in a positive and responsible
fashion.
12
If you try to work through these Steps, you will start to feel much better
about yourself. Now it’s your turn to help others to try to do the same.
Helping others will make you feel even better. Continue to work these
Steps on a daily basis.
12 Steps of AA/NA developed by William Peterman, BS, CADC and reprinted with permission of the
National Head-Injury Foundation Substance Abuse Task Force White Paper, Southborough, MA: NIF, 1988.
66
How do I find a meeting?
www.Alcoholics-anonymous.org will point you to a regional website. Your local
phone book should list the number of the closest central office. These offices
can provide you with a list of meetings. Ask your counsellor for help in finding
this information.
What different kinds of meetings are there?
Open meetings
Open to anyone, regardless of whether or not
they admit a problem with substance use
Closed meetings
Open only to people who are willing to
admit they have a problem with substance use
Lead meetings
A primary speaker tells his or her story of recovery
Discussion meetings
Set in a more intimate setting, these meetings
are usually a round-table discussion
How should I start?
• Most people usually like to start with open meetings
• It’s okay to ask someone to go with you to an open meeting; it is a good idea
for a counsellor or rehab worker to arrange to go with you until you feel
comfortable
• Arrive 10 minutes early, this will give you a chance to adjust to the setting,
look at the literature that is available, and select a seat; it’s also a good time
to make introductions
67
What happens in meetings?
• Meetings often start with reading the 12 steps
• Individuals who have met important milestones will be acknowledged; tokens,
which look like poker chips, are given to participants after specific periods of
staying away from drugs and alcohol
• In Lead meetings, the chairperson will introduce the speaker; the speaker will
tell the story of their addiction and recovery
• People in the group may respond to the speaker; usually they provide words
of encouragement or talk about how the story relates to their experience
• The formal meeting ends with everyone reciting the Lord’s Prayer and an
optional collection is taken to support the meeting
• People stay to talk and have a coffee
Do I have to say anything in front of the group?
• It is okay to attend an open meeting and just listen and observe what
happens in the group
• All of the general rules for group mentioned earlier apply at AA/NA/CA
meetings
What is Sponsorship?
Sponsors are mentors for people who are new to the 12-step group. Having a
sponsor is optional, but is usually useful for people who are new to the program.
The sponsor is a person who has experience with the group and can provide
support along the way. People who act as a sponsor for people with brain
injuries will need some information about brain injury. This can be found at
www.chris.com.
68
Chapter 11
Making the most
of your brain power
Goals
• To take an inventory of any cognitive problems
• To begin developing compensation strategies
Information
Working on your recovery takes a lot of brain power.
There’s a lot to pay attention to, learn, remember and
think about. It’s very common for people in recovery to
notice that they are having problems thinking clearly,
remembering details, learning new information or
staying alert during the day. This may be due to both the
effects of a brain injury and substance use. Developing
compensation strategies works best if you are focused
on a specific problem or difficult situation. For example,
it’s easier to figure out what to do if you are having
trouble remembering appointments than it is to figure
out how to handle a general memory problem.
69
Self-assessment
Most people find that they have some of the problems listed below at one time or
another. Check the box that describes how often these things happen to you.
Seldom
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Sometimes
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Often
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Daydream when I should be listening to something
Misplace or lose things
Feel fatigued during the day or get tired quickly when
I have to pay attention or think hard
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Have difficulty getting places on time
Have difficulty getting started on something
Have difficulty getting something organized
Get distracted while I’m doing something.
Leave things unfinished
Trouble following directions or losing my place
in tasks I know well
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Getting lost in a familiar place
Forgetting to take my medications
Doing something without thinking about the consequences
Trouble thinking ahead
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Trouble remembering names or faces
Trouble understanding or remembering what I read
Forget what I want when I get to the store
Feel confused or irritated in busy or loud places
Forget something that happened
Forget appointments
Have trouble making my mind up about some things
Forget to do things I meant to do
Wonder if I’m using a word correctly, or have words
on the “tip of my tongue”
List any other changes you may have noticed, or problems that you know about from a previous
illness or injury.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Talk about this questionnaire with people who can help you to get around any difficulties that you
may have. With a little planning, these problems won’t interfere with your recovery
70
More information
Compensation strategies
By addressing one issue at a time, it will be easier to overcome any problems you may have. Here
are examples of situations and compensation strategies you can use to help.
If you have trouble paying attention:
Remove distractions
• Turn off the TV or radio when you’re having
a conversation
• Keep your work areas free of clutter
• Close windows/doors to keep noise down
Be an active listener
• Take notes
• Rephrase or repeat what you have been told
• Sit near the front and ask questions
• Let others know when your attention is fading
If you have problems with fatigue:
• Plan your most important activities for
your best time of day
• Take a walk or move around to wake
yourself up
• Ask for a break when you need it
Take good care of your body:
• Eat well (see Chapter 21, page 115)
• Get enough sleep (see Chapter 21, page 115)
• Exercise regularly
• Don’t drink too much caffeine
• Talk to your doctor regularly
• Plan rest periods during the day
If you have problems with memory:
• Keep notes in a special notebook or day planner you can carry with you (this works better than
bits of paper that can get scattered); keep it with you or in a special place so it doesn’t get lost
• Make lists of things to do
• Note appointments on a calendar
• Keep a note pad by your phone to write down important information
• Keep your wallet, glasses and other important items in a special place at home so they don’t get lost
• Place items you need to take with you in a place by your door
• Set alarms to remind you to take medication
• Make posters to remind you of important information
• Give yourself more time to learn new information, underline or make notes while you read
and review information; use the P Q R S T method:
Preview what you need to read
Question yourself about what you will read
Read the material
Summarize the material in your own words and the answers to your questions
Test yourself after reviewing the information several times
(Try not to guess at information. This can interfere with learning.)
71
If you have problems with planning or time management:
• Get in the habit of making a daily plan, using your schedule and a "to do" list
• Review your plan first thing in the morning and again several times throughout the day
• Before going to bed, review what you have done and make a plan to complete unfinished
items
If you have problems with reasoning and problem-solving:
• Talk things over with someone you trust.
• Use the problem-solving strategies in Chapter 20 (see page 109)
Plan
Which compensation strategies do you and your counselor think might be helpful to you?
Write down your ideas.
What Problem(s) are you having? (e.g. forget appointments)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Which strategies will you try? (e.g. keep a calendar)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
How can your counselor/workers help you? (e.g. call to confirm appointments)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
72
Section 3
Understanding yourself
and your relationships
73
Chapter 12
Being your own best friend
Goals
• To learn about the concept of self-talk
• To recognize self-talk
• To understand how to make own
self-talk more productive
Information
Do you remember a great teacher, coach or friend?
If so, it is probably because they helped you in one or more of these ways:
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Helped you set realistic goals
Predicted that you would be successful
Told you what you did right
Gave you specific tips about how to improve
Encouraged you to keep trying even when things didn’t work out
Helped you learn from your mistakes
Listened to your feelings without being critical
75
Self-assessment
Self-talk is the conversation everyone has going on in their heads about what they are doing, how
they are doing and whether they should or should not be doing it. You have probably noticed that
you have self-talk going on in your head all of the time.
What kind of friend are you to yourself? Look through the following examples. Check the ones
that most sound like the way you talk to yourself.
The situation
Critical and negative
Helpful and supportive
You are getting ready to
do something hard
❑ You’ll probably screw
this up too
❑ Just do your best
❑ You’re so stupid
❑ You’ve done things like this before
❑ You can’t do that
❑ You can do it!
❑ Anyone can do that
❑ Good job
❑ You could have been
better, faster, smarter
❑ You made the effort
❑ You are an idiot!
❑ You tried your best
❑ You can’t do anything
right!
❑ You can learn from this
❑ You’re such a baby
❑ Whatever you feel is okay, feelings
are there for a reason
You did something well
You make a mistake
You feel upset
❑ Other people can handle
this, why can’t you?
❑ Take things one step at a time
❑ You did it
❑ You’ll get it right next time
— make a plan
❑ You shouldn’t feel
angry or sad
Someone says something
that hurts your feelings
❑ He’s right, you’re a failure
You are looking at a
magazine
❑ You’re ugly
❑ You look awful
❑ You’re unlovable
❑ There are people who care for you
and who understand you
❑ You’re doing the most with what
you have; you don’t have to be a
model to be attractive
❑ Most people don’t look like the
people in magazines and movies
76
Worksheet, Chapter 12
Being your own best friend
Think about the way you talk to yourself in new or uncomfortable situation. Is it negative self-talk
or positive self-talk that you hear? Use this chart to help you move through a negative approach
and find a positive approach.
Negative self-talk
Positive self-talk
When I don’t like me, I tell myself …
When I make a mistake, I can say to myself…
e.g., How could I make that mistake?
I’m so stupid!
e.g., Everyone makes mistakes,
I’ll try to do better next time.
____________________________________________________
____________________________________________________
____________________________________________________
____________________________________________________
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77
Chapter 13
Building self esteem
Goals
• To understand what self esteem is
• To learn what to do to improve self esteem
• To take responsibility for working on self esteem
Self-assessment
People who feel good about themselves generally have more success.
To do well in recovery, it is important for you to work on building your
self-esteem. Use the self-assessment checklist below to understand more
about what self-esteem is and then make a plan for building yours.
These are ways of building good self-esteem. Which do you do?
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Feel and think about myself in a positive way
Have a sense of well-being and respect for myself
Take care of myself physically and emotionally
Spend time with people whom I respect and who respect me
See my accomplishments as worthwhile
Express my feelings in a way that is respectful of others
Let myself be, without pushing or judging myself
Let others be, without pushing or judging them
Accept and thank others for positive comments
Balance my needs with those of others
Admit mistakes and move on
Make self-talk my best friend
These are ways to reduce your self-esteem. Which do you do?
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Not stand up for myself
Have critical self-talk about not being good enough (smart enough, fast enough, etc.)
Not ask others for what I need in a direct, healthy way
Not ask for help when I need it
Stay trapped in old negative ways of thinking and behaving
Don’t believe — not believing in myself
Try to please others and put myself last
79
Plan
Begin to work on your self-esteem today
Here are some ways of boosting your self-esteem that will have an immediate positive
effect. Check any or all you think would work for you:
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Take care of my body; groom and dress myself in a way that makes me feel proud
Make a list of my strengths
Do something I am good at
Help someone
Set a goal and go for it
Complete the worksheet on the next page
Talk to my counsellor about how things I heard as a child might affect how I feel
about myself now
❑ Other:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
80
Worksheet, Chapter 13
Building self esteem
Use this chart to list all your strengths and the things you do that make you feel good:
My strengths
Feeling good
What do you like about yourself?
What things do you do that make you feel good?
e.g., I have a good sense of humour
e.g., I hang around people who enjoy
my sense of humour
____________________________________________________
____________________________________________________
____________________________________________________
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81
Chapter 14
Building healthy relationships
Goals
• To learn about healthy boundaries
in relationships
• To learn what it means to intrude
on personal boundaries
• To learn how to bring relationships
with others into balance
Information
The amount of sharing and privacy between people is what makes up the boundaries
in a relationship.
Personal Space
This is the amount of physical space people like to have around them and how much
physical contact they like to have. For example, some people don’t mind when a friend
pats them on the back or touches their shoulder, but would be uncomfortable if someone
they just met did this. Some people hug friends — others are uncomfortable with that.
There’s no right or wrong. When a person has good boundaries they respect others’
personal space and watch out for signs that a person is uncomfortable. For example,
when you reach out to pat or hug someone and they step away from you, or pull away, or
change their facial expression — that means they are uncomfortable. Generally it’s enough
to quickly apologize or step back. It’s usually a good idea to ask for feedback if you are
unsure. Use the self-assessment in this chapter to learn more about personal boundaries.
Healthy
Collapsed
Rigid
boundaries
boundaries
boundaries
83
Self-assessment
Do you show any of these signs of collapsed, or poor, interpersonal boundaries?
Check off any that apply to you:
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
I tell all before I know I can trust someone
I talk to someone as if we are best friends the first time we meet
I go against my own values to please someone else
I don’t notice when someone else is showing poor boundaries
I take whatever I can for the sake of getting whatever I can
I give whatever I can for the sake of giving
I let someone hurt my feelings or abuse me
I let others tell me how I should think or feel
I let others tell me what is important
I expect other people to fill my needs without asking
I get weak or fall apart so that someone will take care of me
I do things to hurt myself (self-abuse)
Do you show any of these signs of rigid boundaries?
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
I don’t tell anyone how I feel
I don’t trust, even after I have had time to get to know someone
I feel that others are likely to hurt me — that I am all alone
I expect others to do things my way, or go away
I don’t ask for help
I don’t offer help or support
I stop/close relationships before they get started
How do you demonstrate healthy boundaries?
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
84
I can say no to requests in a nice way
I am okay when others say no to me
I have a lot of self respect
I expect give and take in a relationship — what I would do for them, they would do for me
I share responsibility and control
I share personal information as I get to know someone, and they share information with me
the same way
I don’t tolerate being abused
I know what I need and want and express myself assertively
I value my own opinions and are open to and value others’ opinions
I ask for help when I need it
I don’t push my own values aside to avoid being rejected
Worksheet, Chapter 14
Building healthy relationships
This worksheet is about boundaries. Work through it and you will learn important
information about yourself and your relationships.
What is important to me in my relationships with friends?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What is important to me in my relationships with family?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What is important to me in my relationships with a spouse or partner?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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85
How has my alcohol or drug use changed these important relationships?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What do I need to change in my relationships to help me in my recovery?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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What steps do I need to take to change or improve my relationships?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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Chapter 15
Building a support network
Goal
• To understand the types of support others can offer
• To begin making a plan for increasing support
Information
Recovery is hard work and it is important to have
people around you who can help you along the
way. Using drugs and alcohol may have caused
problems in your relationships and you may feel
that you are not getting much help from other
people right now. You may have the most contact
with people who are still using or who are not
very supportive. It’s a good idea to think about
where you can get the help you need.
Professionals, such as support workers, doctors
and counsellors can be supportive, but their time
is usually limited. That’s why it is important to
think about getting support form different places.
What kinds of social support should you look for?
Emotional
Moral
Practical
Mentorship
Recreational
someone who will listen to you and who you can talk to about feelings
someone who will encourage you
someone you can ask for help with everyday tasks such as transportation
someone you can look to for guidance and instruction
someone you can have fun with
87
Self-assessment
Who is in your life right now?
By completing this exercise you will be able to get a good idea of how
everyone you know fits into your life. By identifying and labelling everyone,
you will be able to see more clearly who might best help you in your recovery.
Put the names of people on the chart according to how often you see them.
Circle the names of people who are now or could be supportive.
Put an X by the names of people who are not supportive or who might be
harmful in some way. Try to move the unhelpful people away from the centre.
Make a plan to move the
helpful people closer.
People I only see or
talk to about once a month or less
People I see
or talk to often
People I see and
talk to daily or several
times a week
88
Worksheet, Chapter 15
Building a support network
Now fill in the following chart. Refer to the list above to help you think of your unmet support
needs. For example, if you’d like to start playing baseball again and have no one to take you,
write that down. Then think of someone who could take you there and perhaps even play and
then plan how you will contact that person. Look at the circle on the previous page (page 88) to
get ideas of who you could contact and who you should not contact.
What do I need support with?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Who can I ask?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What is my plan?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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89
Section 4
Coping Strategies
for life
91
Chapter 16
Assertiveness
Goals
• To understand what assertive behaviour is
• To begin making a plan to practice
assertive behaviour
Information
Taking care of yourself by being assertive, not aggressive
Being assertive means expressing your thoughts, needs and feelings in a direct way that is respectful
of others’ rights. When you are assertive, you are taking care of yourself and managing your anger.
Most people have different styles of coping with their feelings. Check the boxes of the coping styles
that you think apply to you. (The last style, being assertive, is the most productive way to handle
your anger — making everyone involved feel good and getting what you need.)
Basic Coping Styles
Passive
❑
❑
❑
❑
Avoids conflict
Neglects own needs
Feels inferior to others
Often feels hurt, anxious, resentful and frustrated
Aggressive
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Intimidates others to get what they want
Causes conflict
Insensitive to other people’s feelings or wishes
Feels hostile, superior and wants power and control
May have feelings of guilt after behaving aggressively
Passive/Aggressive
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Indirect with feelings
May be passive at first, and then blow up
Won’t talk about what is really bothering them
May make sarcastic or cynical remarks
Feels resentful and looks for revenge
Assertive (best)
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Able to tell people how they feel without putting anyone down
Direct and honest communication
Feel good about themselves, but not by putting others down
Willing to compromise
Feels respect for others and themselves
93
How to make an assertive statement
Use this formula to make an assertive statement.
It’s usually best to keep your statement to one or two sentences.
Describe what is happening
I think…
Just the facts (no judging or blaming)
Express your feelings
I feel…
Give your honest reaction without blaming or intimidating
Specify what you want
I would like it if you would…
Be specific enough so that a person can really do what you are asking
Consequences
I think we would both benefit because…
State the payoff for you and the other person
Example:
I think you have asked me to do a lot of work, and I feel overwhelmed
I would like it if you would make me a list so I know what to do first
We will both benefit because I will work better and get more done
94
Worksheet, Chapter 16
Assertiveness
Think of a situation when you wished you had stood up for yourself or one where you
blew up and regretted it.
Where were you?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Who were you having a problem with?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What did they want from you?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
How did that make you feel?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
How did you respond?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Now, practice three different assertive statements that would have worked for you in
that situation.
1 ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2 ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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3 ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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95
Plan
Tips for learning to be more assertive
• Practice difficult situations; you might even make a script for yourself and go over it
• Ask someone supportive to role-play with you; start by role-playing a person who responds
well to your message; then practice what to do if someone disagrees, or has an aggressive
response to you
• Remember that you have a right to your feelings; you don’t have to justify your feelings or
argue; sometimes restating your main point in a simple way is all that is needed
Example:
I think that you’ve asked me if I want a drink several times now, and I’m feeling a bit pressured.
I would prefer it if you would stop asking, please. That way I’ll feel more relaxed and we can
both enjoy the party.
Supportive response:
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pressure you.
Let’s enjoy the party.
Your response:
Thank you for understanding.
Unsupportive response:
I thought you would have more fun, relax a
little. Don’t be so sensitive, I wasn’t pushing.
Your response:
I was just letting you know what was
on my mind. Let’s get back to the party.
Aggressive response:
Boy are you a killjoy.
Too good to have a little drink?
Your response:
I am sticking to soft drinks tonight.
It takes practice to be assertive. Keep working at it. Don’t be discouraged if you have trouble
thinking on your feet. Learn from situations that come up and practice your responses for difficult
times you can foresee.
Plan ahead
Are there situations that you prepare for ahead of time? Saying “no” to a request? Asking
someone to stop or start doing something? Plan your statement here. Ask someone to role-play
with you. Practice responding to supportive and unsupportive replies.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
96
Chapter 17
Dealing with boredom
Goals
• To learn about the benefits of using
leisure time constructively
• To begin a plan for leisure time that
supports recovery
Information
Being bored is often a trigger for drinking
or using drugs. If your way of spending
free time included using drugs or alcohol,
or you were bored much of the time, you
need some new activities. They might
actually be a new coping strategy that
will benefit you in many positive ways.
The benefits of leisure activities
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Reduces boredom
Healthy form of escape
Decreases stress and tension
Gives a sense of personal well-being
Helps regulate sleeping and eating
Gives life balance
Increases socialization and makes you feel like you are part of the community
Gives you a focus
Creates a sense of freedom
Experience fun and pleasure
Leads to self discovery
Creates a sense of control and accomplishment
Allows for creativity
97
Self-assessment
Which of these problems has kept you from making good use of your free time?
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Easy to fall into past habits (e.g., first choice — turning on the TV)
Lack confidence to try something new
Hard to make time for recreation
Limited budget
Trouble thinking of ideas
Transportation — getting where I want to go
I miss doing things I used to do, but now they are more difficult to manage
Not having someone to do things with
I’m in a bad mood, and I don’t feel like having any fun
I’d rather have a job
❑ Other:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Which of these goals for free time are important to you?
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Finding an activity that is meaningful
Being helpful to others
Meeting people/making friends
Learning something new
Being creative or making something
Relaxing
Working off physical tension
Getting in shape
❑ Other:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
98
Worksheet, Chapter 17
Dealing with boredom
It can be hard to think of things you want to do. Use this check list to get some ideas. It’s best to
have a variety of ideas that include things that you can do alone or with others, at home or in the
community.
Social / Group activities
Creative Activities
❑ Team sports
❑ Clubs/organizations
❑ Volunteering
❑ Church/religious
❑ Sing in a choir
❑ Adult/recreation classes
❑ Other
______________________________________________________________________________________
❑ Arts/crafts (painting, woodworking, knitting)
❑ Music (singing, playing an instrument)
❑ Photography
❑ Creative writing
❑ Drama
❑ Dance
❑ Other
______________________________________________________________________________________
Things you do on your own
Outdoor
❑ Go to libarary
❑ Computers
❑ Puzzles (wordsearch/crosswords)
❑ Jigsaw puzzles
❑ Listen to music
❑ Meditate
❑ Make art
❑ Other
______________________________________________________________________________________
❑ Picnic/cookout
❑ Hiking
❑ Water sports/boating
❑ Gardening
❑ Fishing
❑ Other
______________________________________________________________________________________
Physical activities
❑ Swim
❑ Bowl
❑ Golf
❑ Fitness
❑ Walk
❑ Tennis
❑ Other
______________________________________________________________________________________
Spectator
❑ Watch sports
❑ Go to a play/museum/concert
❑ Go to a movie
❑ Games
❑ Trivia
❑ Board games
❑ Cards
❑ Other
______________________________________________________________________________________
Some ways to get ideas
• Look through your community recreation guide
• Read the newspaper — look for free and low-cost events
• Ask people to talk about what they like to do
99
Plan
Use this worksheet to start making your plan.
What I would
like to do
Barriers/challenges
Possible solutions
Action plan
Go bowling
Don’t know bowlers
Find league
Get community
recreation booklet
Ask at bowling alley
Gardening
Live in apartment
Don’t know much
about it
Start with potted
plants
Visit city gardens
and volunteer
Find local gardening
club and volunteer
Don’t have much
money
This week, I will….
❑ Make a list of three things that I can do on my own, without much planning.
Keep the list where I will see it when I’m bored.
❑ Complete my action plan
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Chapter 18
Coping with strong feelings
Goals
• To learn to cope with strong feelings
• To begin planning coping strategies to
deal with strong feelings
Information
As human beings, we all have feelings. Feelings are
important to our survival because they get us to pay
attention to what is happening and change our behaviour
to deal with the situation. For example, we feel anxiety, or
anger when something or someone threatens our wellbeing. When there is danger approaching, we get anxious,
which should make us more careful. When someone
threatens us, or a need is frustrated, we get angry — which
gives us the energy to fight for what we need. Even though
emotions are helpful, they can also lead us astray. For
example, anxiety is only good for you if there really is
something dangerous around. Anger is only useful if there
really is something important to fight for, and you are in
control enough to be assertive (not aggressive). (See
Chapter 16, page 93, to learn the difference between being
assertive and being aggressive.)
When you have a strong feeling, it’s wise to use your
head to decide what is causing you to feel that way,
and then figure out the best thing to do.
This isn’t always easy. Planning ahead for difficult situations
is probably the best way to avoid problems. Making plans
with your counsellor or other support people in your life can
help you to avoid any problems you have managing
emotions. It’s not enough to just try harder. You need to
have a plan.
101
Emotional maturity
Those addicted to drugs or alcohol use those substances as a way to cope with
strong feelings. When they stop using the drugs, the feelings come back. The
trouble is that during the years that they were using drugs or alcohol they were
not learning about other ways to deal with feelings. That means that when they
stop using they have some catching up to do before becoming an emotionally
mature adult.
Being an emotionally mature person means that you take responsibility for your
feelings. You think things through to be sure that your feelings are not leading
you astray. If you have problems managing your emotions because of a brain
injury or some other difficulty, then it is important to recognize this and get the
support you need.
You shouldn't ignore feelings, but you need to recognize them and deal with
them before they make you feel overwhelmed. Then you do what you need to
do to manage the situation that caused them. You don’t just react to feelings.
You stop and think first.
Be aware of how you are feeling
To prevent becoming overwhelmed by strong feelings, make sure that you tune
in regularly to your everyday feelings. Ideas to help you tune in include:
•
•
•
•
Writing in your journal
Meditating
Talking to your pet or having an imaginary conversation
Making the time to talk to someone you can trust
Stop and think
When you notice that you are having a strong feeling, taking a break from what
is going on can be helpful. You might have to leave the situation, or just sit
quietly where you are. Take a few deep breaths.
Know yourself
Think back — you will probably be able to name the kind of situations that lead
to strong or unpleasant feelings.
Practice expressing your feelings
Letting others know how you are feeling takes time and practice. Going back to
old habits of keeping your feelings bottled up or blowing up can be a warning
sign of relapse.
102
Worksheet, Chapter 18
Coping with strong feelings
Are there feelings you are struggling with? What are they? Fill in the following chart and it will
help you get a handle on which situations give you strong feelings and how you can handle them.
Use this worksheet to think through and plan ahead for ways to cope with strong feelings. The
first two examples might help you.
What I was feeling
When does this happen?
How can I think differently about it?
Angry
Talking to my mother. I hate
it when she tells me what to
do. I’m an adult.
Whatever happens, it’s my choice. She’s
just trying to help.
What can I do?
Keep conversations brief.
Don’t argue. Change the subject.
Say goodbye, hang up or leave.
What I was feeling
When does this happen?
How can I think differently about it?
Sad
Thinking about my failures,
usually when I see how well
my sister is doing.
I’m making good progress.
What can I do?
Make a list of things I’m doing well.
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What I was feeling
When does this happen?
How can I think differently about it?
When does this happen?
How can I think differently about it?
When does this happen?
How can I think differently about it?
What can I do?
What I was feeling
What can I do?
What I was feeling
What can I do?
Chapter 19
Relaxation
Goals
• To learn about the concept of releasing physical and mental tension
• To give an example of a relaxation technique
Information
It is very common for people to drink or to use drugs to relax.
When you stop using drugs or alcohol, you may begin to notice
some symptoms like headaches, trouble sleeping, or anxious feelings.
If you are going to stay sober, you need another way to deal with these
symptoms. You have to be on the lookout for symptoms of tension.
Self-assessment
Does your breathing change?
❑ Faster
❑ More shallow
❑ I hold my breath
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Do you have tension in any muscles?
Forehead
Jaw
Neck
Shoulders
Chest
Stomach
Hands
Legs
❑ Does your heart beat fast?
Do you feel shaky?
❑ Hands
❑ Knees
❑ Do you get a sinking feeling
in your stomach?
Do you have a nervous habit?
❑ Biting your nails
❑ Twisting your hair
❑ Grinding your teeth
Other:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
105
More information
It is possible to learn to relax without the help of drugs. Learning to relax is a skill
you can learn like any other skill. You have to learn it and practice it then you’ll
be able to use it when you need it. There are lots of different ways to relax
including yoga, meditation, relaxed breathing and Tai Chi. They're all examples
of ways to let go of physical and mental tension. In this chapter we’re going to
introduce a simple breathing technique. Try it and practice it. Be on the lookout
for other relaxation techniques, try them and find the ones that work best for you.
Relaxation Exercises
Relaxed breathing works in two ways. It actually helps you breathe as if you
were already relaxed, which sets your body on its way to letting go of tension;
and it gives your mind something to focus on, which helps to relax you even
more. Try the following exercises and then use the ones that work best for you.
Relaxed breathing
1 Find a comfortable, quiet place to sit or lie down; make sure that you are in a
comfortable position, but don’t cross your legs, your back should be supported
2 Close your eyes or find a spot on the wall to focus on
3 Put one hand over your belly button, and the other on your chest
4 Take in a slow deep breath through your nose; the hand on your chest should
stay still; the hand on your belly should rise slowly
5 Imagine that your lungs are filling from the bottom up
6 Let your breath out slowly through your mouth
7 Take another breath only when you feel the urge to breathe; try to breathe
with a slow natural rhythm
8 Take ten slow, relaxed breaths; each time, picture your lungs filling with air
from the bottom up
Tips for relaxed breathing:
• Your tummy should go out when you are breathing in
• Your chest and shoulders should be still
• Your breathing should be at a comfortable, natural pace
106
Brief body scan
Find a comfortable place to sit or lie down. Close your eyes or look at a point on the
wall. Take ten relaxed breaths. As you breathe, focus on the feeling of the air
moving past your mouth and your nose. Each time you exhale picture the tension
leaving your muscles. Imagine that the tension leaves your body with the air from
your lungs. You may feel heavier or lighter with each breath. To help you focus,
picture a blackboard with the numbers one through ten written on it.
Continue to breathe at a slow, relaxed pace. Now, starting with the muscles in your
forehead, concentrate on each muscle group in your body. Work down your body to
your toes. When you get to a tense muscle, take a few short breaths and release the
tension. If you get stuck, then tense the muscle briefly and then let go.
An example of how to tense and relax muscles:
1
2
3
4
Think about the muscles in your forehead; are they tense?
Raise your eyebrows and hold them for a count of three seconds
Lower your eyebrows
Try again if you still feel tension
How to tense and relax specific muscle groups:
Mouth
Jaw
Shoulders
Arms
Hands
Legs
Feet
Smile or frown
Clench your jaw; then wiggle your jaw
Shrug your shoulders
Press your arms against your sides
Make a fist
Push against the floor
Curl your toes
Tips for practicing relaxation
• Take quick relaxation breaks during the day
• Put an appointment for relaxation on your schedule to remind you to practice
• Daily practice should be done in a quiet place without distractions; practice for
five minutes and then increase the time slowly as you start to enjoy your practice.
• In addition to the relaxation exercises above, try some of the relaxation tapes that
are available at the library or in bookstores
• Make your own tape with music you find relaxing
107
Chapter 20
Problem solving
Goals
• To learn that effective problem-solving is an important life skill
• To understand how this skill will help recovery
Information
The six steps of problem-solving
1 Define the problem
2 Brainstorm possible solutions
3 Rate the possible solutions
4 Arrive at a plan
5 Implement the plan
6 Notes for next time
1 Define the problem
Once you have decided that a problem exists, take your time, think about it and see if you can get
to the root of it. A good plan is to break a problem down into its parts. Try to write it as a
statement, beginning with "I". For example, I am bored or I would like a job. Then try to
answer these questions:
•
•
•
•
What are the pros and cons of the situation now? (It’s probably not ALL bad.)
What do I need?
What do I want?
What are the barriers?
2 Brainstorm possible solutions
Write down possible solutions. Write down as many as you can think of, but don’t be too critical
of yourself. Ask people close to you for some suggestions.
3 Rate the solutions
Review the pros and cons of each solution. Consider them all carefully, then put them in order,
starting with the one you like the most, down to the one you like the least.
109
4 Arrive at a plan
You might find that your favourite solution has some downsides to it. There may be a barrier of
some kind to achieving it. Your counsellor, group, or someone close to you can help find a way
around any obstacles.
5 Implement the plan
Follow your plan, making adjustments if you need to.
6 Notes for next steps
There is always something new to be learned. It is important to review the results of your plan so
that you are ready if a similar problem comes up in the future.
Example
Andrew has a friend Susan with whom he used to spend a lot of time. Talking with his counsellor,
he realized that even though he thought of her as a friend, she really was a drinking buddy. They
only saw each other when they had money to buy drinks. He accepts her invitations to hang out
and always feels sorry later because he ends up having something to drink. Andrew doesn’t want
to hurt Susan’s feelings, and he does like the idea of spending time with a woman — even if she’s
just a friend. Susan isn’t interested in giving up drinking. Andrew feels torn. He knows that seeing
her isn’t good for his recovery.
Here’s how Andrew dealt with the problem:
1 Andrew defined it
I’m torn because I want to spend time with a person but that person is not
supportive. Right now she’s the only friend I have in my neighbourhood.
He broke it down into parts.
What do I want?
• To spend time with Susan.
• To spend time with a supportive person
• To avoid conflict with Susan
• To stay sober
What do I need?
• Sober friends
• The will and the skills to say no
What are the barriers?
• I spend a lot of time alone
• I’m still learning to be assertive
110
2 Andrew brainstormed it
Andrew discussed his situation with his counsellor and came up with lots of possible
solutions. Here are a few:
1 Talk to Susan, and ask her to stop asking me to go drinking with her
Pros: Avoid drinking
Cons: Hurt her feelings; feel lonely and bored; hard to say no because I have
nothing else to do; I feel funny so I give in
2 Try to get Susan to spend time with me without drinking
Pros: Great if it worked
Cons: Tried several times; wound up drinking
3 Get in touch with my cousin who doesn’t drink and make plans to hang out
Pros: He’s good company
Cons: It takes time and bus fare to get to his place
4 Go to a 12-step meeting in my neighbourhood
Pros: Fills time; makes it possible to meet people
Cons: Feel awkward at meetings
5 Move to a new neighbourhood
Pros: Get away from non-supportive friend
Cons: Expensive; would still be lonely
3 Andrew rated the possible solutions
Andrew looked at his list and realized that he had to make a plan that helped him stop
seeing Susan, and to deal with feeling lonely and bored. The cons of seeing his cousin and
going to 12-step meetings seemed like things he could plan around. He decided to start there.
4 Andrew arrived at a plan
Andrew figured that it would be easier to say “no” to Susan’s invitations if he had
something definite on his schedule. It is easier for him to turn down a drink when he has
somewhere else to be. Here’s the plan he made:
• Practice assertive ways to say “no” to Susan;
Andrew and his counsellor practiced ways to say “no” even when Susan is persistent
• Ask for support to help add activities to his schedule
• Made a standing date with his cousin for Monday night to watch a video and have dinner
• Attend AA meetings on Tuesday and Sunday; make a point to stay for coffee
• Look for a volunteer job on Wednesday and Friday
• Schedule counselling for Thursday
• Make plans with family for one day on the weekend
111
5 Andrew implemented the plan
• He made the call to his cousin who was happy that there was something he could do to
be supportive
• He and his counsellor found meetings he could attend
• He wrote times and instructions in his notebook so he wouldn’t forget.
• He applied for a number of volunteer positions
• He talked with his sister and his parents about visiting them on the weekend
• He tried one volunteer job doing filing for a community centre
• He also sold hot dogs at the stand during the kid’s hockey games
6 Andrew made notes for next steps
Andrew did find that it got easier each time he said “no” to Susan. After a few weeks she
stopped asking, but he sometimes felt very sad and lonely. He talked with his counsellor
about losing his friend and about being worried about her.
Andrew was shy at 12-step meetings — a problem he hadn’t realized. He is used to
socializing while high. Andrew and his counsellor added “coping with anxiety” to
their plan.
Andrew figured out that he feels most comfortable being social when he’s active, when
he’s doing something — he liked volunteering at the hockey rink better than 12-step
meetings. He got to talk about hockey with the players’ parents and enjoyed watching the
kids’ games. He plans to look for other volunteer jobs that will help him meet people who
have interests like his own.
112
Worksheet, Chapter 20
Problem solving
Think of a problem in your life that you would like to solve. Use the same exercise as in the
example with Andrew.
1 Define the problem
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What is happening now?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Break the problem down into parts
What do I want?
Barriers
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What do I need?
Barriers
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2 Brainstorm possible solutions
3 Rate possible solutions
Possible solution
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Pros
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Cons
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
113
4 Arrive at a plan
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
5 Implement the plan
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
6 Notes for next steps
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
114
Chapter 21
Staying healthy
Goals
• To get basic information about eating right
• To get information about physical activity
• To get information about getting a good night’s rest
• To start setting personal goals for staying healthy
Information
Why is eating right important to recovery?
People who are actively using drugs and alcohol often neglect to take care of their body. Eating
well helps their bodies recover. Sometimes feelings of fatigue are actually caused by early signs of
malnutrition. Eating well can help you to feel better sooner.
Eating right
The body needs more than 50 different nutrients, like vitamins, each day. To get them you need to eat
a variety of foods. The Canada Food Guide is a good place to start to learn about nutrition. You can get
a copy from the Heath Canada Web site at: http://www.hc-sc.gc.ca/fn-an/nutrition/index_e.html.
The main food groups are: grains, vegetables, fruits, milk products and meat products and
alternatives. The healthy diet that Health Canada recommends is mostly grains and fruits and
vegetables and a few servings of milk products and meat (and other high protein foods) per day.
Basic tips for eating well during recovery
1
Make small changes over a period of days so you’ll stay with it.
2
If you don’t feel like eating: Don’t force yourself to eat a lot at one time. Have small meals
that include foods that look good to you, and eat regularly to keep your energy up. (Using
drugs and alcohol can change your appetite and it may take a while to get your appetite back.)
3
If you find you want to eat a lot: It is common for people to eat too much when they are
feeling stressed, bored, upset or tired. If you find that you’re using food as a coping strategy,
then try to problem solve using other strategies, such as relaxation (see Chapter 19, page 105).
4
Choose foods with various textures and colours and arrange servings attractively on a plate.
This will make eating more enjoyable.
115
5
Eat breakfast: A lot of people skip this meal, but it is important to eat something in the
morning to give your body enough energy to start the day. You don’t have to eat right away,
but you should eat something within the first hour of getting out of bed. Also, try to eat
something that contains protein. Protein breaks down slowly and keeps your energy level
higher longer than other food groups. Leftovers from dinner might make a good breakfast.
Here are some other examples of good breakfast foods:
Blender Drink
1 cup of skim milk
1/2 cup of fresh fruit
1 tablespoon of skim milk powder
Honey or sugar to sweeten
Simple Breakfast 1
Fresh fruit
Low fat yogurt
Whole wheat toast or muffin
Simple Breakfast 2
Fresh fruit
Whole wheat bagel with peanut butter
Skim milk
Fresh fruit
6
Eat often and snack right: Having a light meal or a healthy snack every three or four hours
keeps your body supplied with energy all day and keeps you from feeling tired. It also helps
prevent mood swings and cravings. Snacks should be light and include protein, such as lowfat milk, cheese, yoghurt and lean meats.
Snack Ideas:
Fresh fruit
Small handful of almonds
Low-fat yoghurt
A piece of cheese the size of your thumb, and four crackers
A piece of lean meat on a piece of whole wheat bread
7
Keep sweets to a minimum: Candy bars, cookies, and other foods high in sugar may give you
energy for a short while, but they will make you feel tired. They don’t contain the nutrition
you need and they may spoil your appetite for healthier foods.
8
Cut down on fat: Fatty foods are foods that are fried, like French fries and fried fish. They also
include high fat meats like some sausages. Eating high fat foods can leave you feeling tired.
9
Limit your caffeine intake: Don’t drink more than 3 or 4 servings of caffeine a day. That’s one
small cup (about the size of your fist) of coffee, a can of cola and small cup of tea. A lot of
soft drinks contain caffeine — some more than coffee. Decaffeinated coffee has a very small
amount of caffeine (about 3% of a regular cup of coffee). There is caffeine in some cold
medicines, headache pills and weight loss products. So be careful and read the labels.
10
Drink enough liquid: Your body is made up mostly of water. You need water to be healthy.
Drink six to eight cups of water a day. If you don’t like water, juice works too — but don’t
overdo the sugar. Cola and coffee don’t count as healthy liquids.
116
Get some physical activity
All it takes to be healthy is about one hour of activity in the day. That may sound like a lot, but
introduce activities ten minutes at a time here, ten minutes at a time there — before you know it,
you’re more active. Health Canada has more information that may be useful. Go to
http://www.phac-aspc.gc.ca/pau-uap/paguide/start.html for suggestions. Even if you have
some difficulties with mobility there are lots of ways to add physical activity to your daily schedule.
Your plan doesn’t need to be complicated. Start off slow and build up slowly — that’s the best
way to make a lasting change in your habits.
• Take a ten-minute walk in the morning; walking and propelling a wheelchair are both good
forms of moderate exercise
• A short routine of stretches that you can do in the morning or during the day will keep you
flexible; if you have pain or limited mobility, ask your doctor or a physiotherapist for the
stretches that would be best for you
• Take a few breaks during the day to walk or wheel
• Get off the bus or train a stop or two early, or park so you have to walk a little farther
• Dance to your favourite music for ten minutes
• Watch an exercise program on TV
• Set a goal to find at least one active form of group recreation — dancing, hiking or walking
Make sure you get enough sleep
Getting a good night’s sleep is important. Drugs and alcohol often affect your sleep patterns. You
may find that you’re wide awake at night, when you want to get to sleep and tired or sleepy
during the day. It is normal to have some sleepless nights. Don’t let it worry you — what keeps
most people awake is trying too hard to sleep!
Make a schedule for going to sleep and waking up. This helps train your body to feel tired at
the right time. If you have a bad night, try not to sleep in. It’s better to deal with the fatigue for a
day and get yourself back in the right rhythm. Take a brief nap if you feel the need.
Limit your naps to under an hour. Avoid napping in the evening. You might feel tired and
need to nap. Most people get tired in the afternoon. Resting isn’t bad, but if you do nap keep it
short, and don’t nap after 3 p.m. in the afternoon. Sleeping too much during the day will keep
you from getting the right kind of deep sleep at night.
Avoid caffeine 4-6 hours before bedtime. Even if you think caffeine doesn’t affect you it’s a
good idea to avoid it before bed. Remember that this includes chocolate, tea and soft drinks.
Avoid heavy, spicy or sugary foods 4-6 hours before bedtime. These can affect your ability
to stay asleep.
117
Exercise regularly, but not right before bed. Regular exercise, particularly in the
afternoon, can help deepen sleep. Strenuous exercise within 2 hours before bedtime,
however, can decrease your ability to fall asleep.
Make sure your bedroom is a comfortable place to be. Adjust the temperature,
get a comfortable bed, arrange for the room to be quiet and dark enough to get to
sleep.
Reserve your bed for sleep and sex. Try not to use your bed for reading or work or
watching TV. These are activities that can keep you awake at night. If you need some
background noise at night, turn on the radio. Put it on a timer so it shuts itself off.
Eat a small snack. Warm milk (without cocoa) and foods high in the amino acid
tryptophan, such as bananas, may help you to sleep.
Practice relaxation techniques before bed. Deep breathing and other relaxation
exercises may help relieve anxiety and reduce muscle tension.
Take a warm shower or bath before bed. Warming up your body can make you feel
more relaxed and sleepy.
Read something relaxing. Choose a book that you can put down easily and that
leaves you in a peaceful mood. Reading from a book of poems, devotions or religious
text can be helpful. Magazines with short articles are also a good choice. But
remember; don't bring the book to bed as it may keep you up.
Avoid staying in bed if you’re tossing and turning or worrying. It’s better to get
out of bed and do something relaxing like reading until you feel drowsy. Go back to
bed and try to fall asleep again. Sometimes writing a list of worries and telling yourself
you’ll get to them tomorrow will help you to put problems out of your mind. Try a
relaxation exercise (see Chapter 19, page 105) or move to a chair and read something
calming. Go back to bed when you feel sleepy. It may be helpful to work with your
counsellor to develop a coping strategy for worrying at night.
If you wake up in the middle of the night: Most people wake up one or two times
a night for various reasons. That is normal. If you find that you wake up in the middle
of the night and cannot get back to sleep within 15–20 minutes, get out of bed and
read something calming. Avoid getting into the habit of eating late at night because
your body will then begin to expect a midnight snack. Don’t watch TV. It’s too easy to
get involved in a program that will keep you awake.
If you have nightmares, flashbacks or dreams about using: It is very common to
have flashbacks of past problems or nightmares while you are in recovery. These
experiences are normal. Talk with your counsellor and doctor and make a coping plan.
118
Worksheet, Chapter 21
Staying healthy
Use the information in this chapter to set personal goals
for staying healthy.
Name three things you can do this week to start eating better
(e.g., eat breakfast, choose a healthy snack, drink more water)
1 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
3 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Name three things you can do to get a good night’s rest
(e.g., set a regular bedtime, relax before bed, make sure my room is a comfortable temperature)
1 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
3 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Name three things you can do to increase your physical activity
(e.g., take the stairs, walk ten minutes in the morning, get off the bus one stop early)
1 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
3 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
119
Section 5
Pulling it all together
121
Chapter 22
Goal-setting for recovery
Goals
• To learn about the importance of setting goals
• To learn about setting realistic goals
• To begin to think about personal goals for recovery
Information
Recovery is a busy time. Unless you set
goals and make a plan for how to reach
them, there can be so much to do it can
get confusing. Here are clear goal-setting
exercises to break down what you have
to do into do-able, manageable routines.
• Routines can be a useful way to get things done things that happen on a regular basis;
try to build in routines wherever you can
• Get into the habit of making appointments with yourself to get tasks done; if you set
aside a specific time for a specific task, you’re more likely to do what you set out to do
• Make sure that you really can do the things that are on your action plan; think about
what you can reasonably manage during your recovery
Good goals are:
Meaningful Get you where you want to go
Measurable You know when you’ve met them
Time-limited You know when you can expect to complete them
Realistic
It’s reasonable to expect success
Where do you start?
As you work on your recovery you’ll find lots of information about things that you can do
to improve your well-being and ways you can move toward your goal for staying substance
free. As a way to help you set your goals, read the checklist below. Feel free to add your
own ideas. Try to think of ways you can start working toward your goals each day.
123
Self-assessment
Go through the following checklist to identify how you can start setting goals.
Check off any that you think would work for you, or write in your own.
Goal: Finding your triggers
❑ Talk to your counsellor about the last time you used or drank; work with your counsellor to
identify your triggers
❑ Write in your journal when you come across a trigger
❑ Other goals:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Goal: Managing difficult situations
❑
❑
❑
❑
Write out a script you can use when you’re offered drugs or alcohol
Make a list of places and people you should avoid
Make a list of people who support you in your sobriety
Other goals:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Goal: Taking care of your body
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Have breakfast
Eat healthy snacks
Get to bed around the same time each night
Drink only one cup of coffee each day
Take your medications as they were prescribed
Practice your relaxation exercises
Start some physical activity
Other goals:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
124
Goal: Taking care of your emotional/spiritual well-being
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
❑
Write in your journal
Talk to a friend
Pray or meditate
Read
Practice tuning into your feelings
Other goals:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Goal: Communicating better
❑ Ask someone for help; start with something small, such as asking a store clerk for help in
finding an item
❑ Practice ways to give feedback in a nice and positive way
❑ Practice being an active listener, by nodding and making eye contact
❑ Make a supportive statement in group
❑ Give someone a compliment
❑ Make an assertive statement
❑ Other goals:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Goal: Spending time thinking about things
that make you feel good
A lot of people have a hard time doing this. It might seem like a waste of time. But it isn’t, it’s a
productive exercise. Go ahead, let yourself daydream. You can’t change your past and you can’t
count on winning a million dollars, but you can think about what would turn a normal day into an
extra-special day for you.
Here's an example:
Jim isn’t working right now. He’s bored a lot of the time, and feels like his life is going nowhere.
He wants to get a job or go back to school. While daydreaming he remembered that last Monday
had been a pretty good day. He had an appointment and got up early instead of sleeping in. He
had breakfast at a coffee shop and the man behind the counter started a conversation with him.
125
He helped a lady when she dropped her bag at the grocery store and she smiled and thanked him.
He watched a football game with his brother and there were no arguments. Those were all small
events, but they all added up to a very special day, a good day. When Jim reflected, or
daydreamed about that day, he realized a few things:
•
•
•
•
•
He feels good when his day starts before noon
He gets out of the house when he has a plan
He feels good when he has the chance to help others
He enjoys watching sports
He likes spending time with his brother
Think about what makes a day a good day for you. Use these details to build a list of ideas you
can use to have more and more good days. Start daydreaming!
When you daydream about having a good day:
Who are you with?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Where are you?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What are you doing?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Happy people celebrate their accomplishments (even small ones) and count their blessings. They
take time to make each day as good as possible. What can you do to make your days more
pleasant?
•
•
•
•
•
Help someone with something
Congratulate myself for working on my recovery
Do something that I enjoy
Take a walk
Other ideas
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
126
Plan
Weekly Recovery Checklist
Put this list together each week. This will help to make sure you have everything working for you.
Check off each box as you complete the task. Cut out the plan and put it somewhere where you
will see it each day. Put it someplace that works best for you — the bathroom mirror, a kitchen
shelf, your refrigerator door.
❑ My appointments are listed on my calendar
❑ My schedule is listed on my calendar
❑ My plans for attending appointments are made (note any plans that need to be made,
e.g., childcare, transportation, etc.)
❑ I have completed my action plan and scheduled any actions I need to take on my calendar
❑ Other plans for this week include:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Weekly Action Plan
This week, I will manage my triggers by:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
This week, I will take care of my body by:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
This week, I will take care of my emotional and spiritual health by:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
This week, I will work on my communication skills by:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
127
Chapter 23
Learning from lapses
Goals
• To learn the difference between
lapse (a slip) and relapse
• To develop an emergency plan
• To learn some strategies for
learning from lapses
Information
A lapse is often part of the progress
Having a lapse means a return to using either drugs or alcohol. It can be a single event
or a few events.
Having a lapse does not mean that all of your progress is gone. It does mean that
something needs to be done to get back on track and stay on track.
Early signs of a lapse can be hard to see
Be on the lookout for decisions you make that do not seem to be overly important on
their own, but might bring you closer to a high-risk situation. You might say to yourself
that you have a good reason for getting into that particular situation, but really it is just
a lie you are telling yourself.
Joe’s example: Joe knows that if he takes the A bus, he will pass his old
drinking buddy’s house and the place they used to go drinking. He and his counsellor
made a plan to avoid this high-risk situation by having Joe take a different bus home.
One day Joe had to stand waiting in the rain for his bus, and when the A bus stopped,
he thought, "just this once…" He started taking that bus regularly, and after a few
days, he got off in his old drinking buddy’s neighborhood. That’s what led to his lapse.
Signs on the road to lapses
Here are some of the things that might let you know a lapse is coming
• Life out of balance, e.g., stress, loneliness, boredom
• I deserve this, my life isn’t what I want it to be
• Danger! High risk situation
129
Self-assessment
Review the Lapse
Check any or all of these factors that apply to you and your situation:
❑ Is my lifestyle out of balance? Do I have too much stress, not enough coping support,
too much to do, too little to do?
❑ Did a strong feeling lead to my lapse?
❑ Was I trying to test myself?
❑ Were there people around who influenced me to use?
❑ Was I thinking that I owe myself some pleasure?
❑ Did I make a decision to get into to a high-risk situation?
❑ Did I feel discouraged about being sober?
❑ Did I think I couldn’t handle a situation that came up?
❑ Did I try to cope, but something went wrong?
❑ Did something I didn’t expect happen?
What to do in case of a lapse?
Cut out this card and place it somewhere you can refer to it a few times each day.
This card is made to fit in your wallet. If you need larger print, use a copy machine or your
computer printer to make a larger copy.
✄
A lapse is not a sign of failure.
It is one stop on the road to success.
1 Stop. Once you see it, stop it. Leave the situation and/or ask for help
2 Look and listen. Pay attention to what is happening so that you can learn from it
3 Try to stay calm. A lapse does not mean that your recovery has failed; one slip doesn’t
mean that you’ve had a total relapse; it does not erase the progress you have made
4 Review your reasons for wanting to stop using; go back to your Top 5 Motivators
5 Think about your past successes; this will help you realize that all is not lost
6 Review the situation that led up to the lapse
7 Try to let go of feelings of guilt and/or shame; show yourself some compassion;
stopping isn’t easy; learn from what happened so that you can cope better next time
131
Plan
It's a good idea to have an emergency plan. An emergency plan is a set of instructions you can
refer to when you feel that you might have a lapse or if you have had a lapse.
Leave the situation.
Here are some ideas for places that I can go:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Call someone.
Here is a list of people I can call, with their phone numbers:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Here is a list of crisis numbers that I can call:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Here are other instructions that may be useful:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
133
Appendix A
For more information
Substance Abuse
Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH)
http://www.camh.net/About_Addiction_Mental_Health/Drug_and_Addiction_
Information/index.html
Health Canada Straight Facts about Substance Abuse
http://www.hc-sc.gc.ca/ahc-asc/pubs/drugs-drogues/index_e.html
Government of Canada Health Portal / Addictions:
http://chp-pcs.gc.ca/CHP/index_e.jsp/pageid/4005/odp/Top/Health/Addictions
Acquired Brain Injury
Ontario Brain Injury Association
http://www.obia.on.ca
Traumatic Brain Injury Resource Center
http://www.braininjuryresources.org
Substance Abuse and Acquired Brain Injury
Community Head Injury Resource Services (CHIRS)
http://chirs.com
Ohio Valley Center for Brain Injury Prevention and Rehabilitation
http://www.ohiovalley.org
Substance Abuse Program Directories
Drug and Alcohol Directory of Treatment (DART)
http://www.dart.on.ca
Canadian Centre on Substance Abuse: Treatment Locator —
http://www.ccsa.ca/CCSA/EN/Topics/Intervention/Key_Questions_Treatment.htm
135
Program Reference Materials
Available through CAMH (www.camh.net)
Structured Relapse Prevention — An Outpatient Counselling Approach
Helen M. Annis, Marilyn A. Herie, Lyn Watkin-Merek
Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, 1996
Treating Concurrent Disorders: A Guide for Counsellors
Edited by Wayne Skinner
Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, 2004
Nutrition and Recovery: A Professional Resource
for Healthy Eating During Recovery from Substance Abuse
Trish Dekker
Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, 2000
136
Appendix B
Forms for reproduction
✄
Coping Card (Tape quarter for phone call and/or subway token on back)
Top 5 reasons for change
Emergency Plan
1___________________________________ 1 Leave the situation
2___________________________________ 2 Go somewhere safe such as
3___________________________________
________________________________
4___________________________________ 3 Take a few deep breaths
5___________________________________
and try to relax.
Call________________________________ Phone__________________________
Call________________________________ Phone__________________________
Call________________________________ Phone__________________________
✄
A lapse is not a sign of failure.
It is one stop on the road to success.
1 Stop. Once you see it, stop it. Leave the situation and/or ask for help
2 Look and listen. Pay attention to what is happening so that you can learn from it
3 Try to stay calm. A lapse does not mean that your recovery has failed; one slip doesn’t
mean that you’ve had a total relapse; it does not erase the progress you have made
4 Review your reasons for wanting to stop using; go back to your Top 5 Motivators
5 Think about your past successes; this will help you realize that all is not lost
6 Review the situation that led up to the lapse
7 Try to let go of feelings of guilt and/or shame; show yourself some compassion;
stopping isn’t easy; learn from what happened so that you can cope better next time
Daily Journal
Date: _________________________________________________________________
Today I… (List your main activities)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I made a step toward recovery by…
(Don’t worry if it seems small. Was there a coping skill you learned or tried, something you learned about yourself?)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I’ve been thinking about…
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Questions or things I want to remember to do…
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Plan
Weekly Recovery Checklist
Put this list together each week. This will help to make sure you have everything working for you.
Check off each box as you complete the task. Cut out the plan and put it somewhere where you
will see it each day. Put it someplace that works best for you — the bathroom mirror, a kitchen
shelf, your refrigerator door.
❑ My appointments are listed on my calendar
❑ My schedule is listed on my calendar
❑ My plans for attending appointments are made (note any plans that need to be made,
e.g., childcare, transportation, etc.)
❑ I have completed my action plan and scheduled any actions I need to take on my calendar
❑ Other plans for this week include:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Weekly Action Plan
This week, I will manage my triggers by:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
This week, I will take care of my body by:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
This week, I will take care of my emotional and spiritual health by:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
This week, I will work on my communication skills by:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________