a PDF - Hospice of the Valley
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a PDF - Hospice of the Valley
FALL/WINTER 2014 Every Moment A Biannual Newsletter of Hospice of the Valley Since 1979, tens of thousands of our friends and neighbors have received compassionate care and grief support Photo Credit: Elley Photography from Hospice of the Valley. Founders Jennie Magid, front right, and Gay Crawford address the crowd at the 35th anniversary celebration. HOSPICE OF THE VALLEy CELEBRATING 35 yEARS! Since 1979, tens of thousands of our friends and neighbors have received compassionate care and grief support from Hospice of the Valley. That care has made a big difference in lives all over Silicon Valley. Our Beginnings Hospice of the Valley was created on the belief that there had to be a better way to serve patients and their families at the end of life. The organization began when local resident Jennie Magid gathered a group of friends after the death of her husband and launched Project Journey (Hospice of the Valley’s first name) in an effort to provide quality of life to terminally-ill patients and their families. In January 1972, Jennie Magid stood by her husband, George Joseph Magid, MD, as he was diagnosed with lung cancer. Enduring multiple surgeries, he finally succumbed to the disease in 1975. Jennie and their three small children did not have an opportunity to say goodbye the morning he died. “My husband was a physician and practiced here in Santa Clara County,” Magid said. We were lucky to have a life raft of family and friends for support. But, while I waited in the hospital waiting rooms, I saw families all around me who were isolated and alone. I felt at that time that we needed to find an organization that could help patients and their families through this difficult period in their life. Being a young woman at the time, I thought instead of becoming a bitter person, I needed to do something. Hospice was the answer to that need.” Continues on page 4 LIVING EVERY MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 James Ramoni and Jennifer Ramirez Named to Hospice of the Valley’s Professional Advisory Board Hospice of the Valley has named aging, hospice and palliative care experts James Ramoni and Jennifer Ramirez to its Professional Advisory Board. Ramoni is director of the Department of Aging and Adult Services, Social Services Agency, for the County of Santa Clara. His entire professional career has been in the Santa Clara County Social Services Agency, dating to 1990 as an entrylevel social worker in child welfare. In 1999, Ramoni moved to the newly created Department of Aging and Adult Services, serving as the manager of the Senior Nutrition Program, as well as the In-Home Supportive Services Program. He was appointed director of the Department of Aging and Adult Services in 2013 and is responsible for Adult Protective Services, the Senior Nutrition Program, In-Home Supportive Services Program, and the Public Guardian/Administrator/ Guardian/Conservator Office, as well as the county initiative, the Seniors’ Agenda. Ramoni has a master’s in social welfare from the University of California, Berkeley, and a B.A. in molecular biology and psychology from San Jose State University. He is also a licensed clinical social worker. Jennifer Ramirez is deputy director at Children’s Hospice and Palliative Care Coalition. She advocates statewide for pediatric hospice and palliative care, oversees the Family Advisory Council, directs the agency’s internal operations, and manages the local Partnership for Children transportation and Remembrance WINGS OF SUNDAY, DECEMBER 7, 2014 financial assistance program serving Monterey, Santa Cruz and San Benito counties in California. She brings 14 years of experience in the nonprofit sector, previously working in the independent living movement at Central Coast Center for Independent Living (CCCIL), advocating for the rights of people with disabilities, including those with serious illnesses. “Hospice of the Valley is very fortunate to add the expertise of James Ramoni and Jennifer Ramirez to our Professional Advisory Board,” said Sally Adelus, president and CEO of Hospice of the Valley. “We look forward to their contributions to our mission of bringing dignity and hope for those facing serious illness by providing comfort through compassionate palliative, hospice and grief care.” n Remember your loved ones at our annual Wings of Remembrance. Wings of Remembrance is Hospice of the Valley’s annual winter memorial to remember loved ones. The memorial consists of music, reflection, and a seasonal meditation. The highlight is a dove ceremony in which participants can place their decorated dove on our remembrance tree. The event at our office, 4850 Union Ave., San Jose, will take place from 1 to 3 p.m. and 5 to 7 p.m. Sunday, December 7. Please join us. Admission is free and refreshments will be served. Please RSVP at 408.559.5600 or online at www.hospicevalley.org/calendar/event/wings-of-remembrance1. n Page 2 LIVING EVERy MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 A SEASON OF HOPE AND GRATITUDE OUR MISSION This month Hospice of the Valley launched a yearlong celebration of our 35th year. I am so grateful for the vision and tenaciousness of our founders, Jennie Magid and Gay Crawford, and so many other volunteer leaders who paved the way for thousands of our families and neighbors to receive help through their end-of-life journeys. The holidays also mark a season of hope and gratitude. I am grateful for our Hospice of the Valley team who work tirelessly, 24/7, 365 days a year, to be available when patients and families need them most. People have a choice in choosing a hospice. And tens of thousands chose and continue to choose Hospice of the Valley for our expertise, personal attention and compassion. Photo Credit: Alain McLaughlin By Sally Adelus, President and CEO It is because of you that Hospice of the Valley has grown and expanded to serve the needs of the seriously ill and dying in our community. We serve all ages, from children in our expressive arts classes who have experienced a loss, to our nation’s veterans. Last year, we opened the Palliative Care Center Silicon Valley to serve patients and families coping with serious illness. This year we achieved Level 2 status with the National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization (NHPCO) We Honor Veterans Program, ensuring veterans in Silicon Valley have support and quality end-of-life care. I am so proud of the role we’ve all played in Hospice of the Valley’s 35 years of success. Thank you for supporting our mission with your end-of-year gift so that our neighbors in need may find dignity in end-of-life care. n We affirm dignity and hope for those facing serious illness by providing comfort through compassionate palliative, hospice, and grief care. We strengthen our community through advocacy, education, research and volunteerism. But I am especially grateful for you, our donors, for your continued support of our mission. “I am so proud of the role we’ve all played in Hospice of the Valley’s 35 years of success.” Page 3 355 LIVING EVERy MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 HOSPICE OF THE VALLEy CELEBRATING 35 yEARS! “After my husband died, I visited Hospice of Marin and it was then that I decided to gather a group of friends who I felt were talented and skilled, who had a lot of commitment and dedication, and I knew would see things through,” Magid said. She engaged her friends to become founding committee members to start a hospice, including Dr. Phillip Blumenthal, Anne Louden, Margaret Slemmons, Grace Collins, Helen Hansen, Grace Parker, Jim Katzman, Molly Ording and her neighbor, Dr. Robert H. Reid. In an effort to create structure and support, she called Gay Crawford, who had been a volunteer for the American Cancer Society. “It seems to me a guiding hand always brings the right person to you at the right time,” Magid said. “This journey has been From left, Chuck Toeniskoetter, Neal Slatkin, M.D., and so rewarding. Everyone Randall Willoughby at Hospice of the Valley’s 35th involved was so supportive anniversary celebration at the Capital Club Silicon Valley. and gave of their time because they knew how advance directives to inform important this was. And look what medical providers about happened. It has really come to end-of-life wishes, life transitions fruition. When you go through a workshops for families in transition, period like I did, it’s like you are in as well as palliative care for those limbo and your compassionate, coping with serious illness, in-home loving and kind friends come through hospice care for all ages, and grief for you. It’s like a gift. And I wanted counseling for adults and children. everyone else to have that, too.” Hospice of the Valley continues to Hospice Today expand our services and outreach. Last year, we opened the Palliative Silicon Valley residents Care Center Silicon Valley to serve continue to benefit from patients and families coping with Magid’s vision and the serious illness. group’s commitment and Photo Credit: Elley Photography So began Project Journey. The group met in homes for several years and, joining the group, the Rev. Roy Strausberger helped to put together a planning board to seek funding. Reid also suggested the name of Hospice of the Valley. Patient service began on February 29, 1980, with an all-volunteer team of physicians, nurses, respite workers, a social worker, and a chaplain. From left, Paula Reed, Sally Adelus, Jennie Magid, Gay Crawford, Jeff Strawn and San Jose Mayor Chuck Reed at the 35th anniversary celebration. Page 4 Photo Credit: Elley Photography Continued from page 1 dedication. For decades, community residents have planned for endof-life with their doctors and care teams with the Hospice of the Valley team at their side. We continue to help and support the community, from workshops on Letters, notes and emails of praise from those we’ve served continue to flood our inbox, and we’ve shared a few of those with you in this newsletter. We plan to be here for the community for years to come and continue to deliver on our mission. n 5years years LIVING EVERy MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 A PROMISE DELIVERED By Debra Moorehead “Words cannot truly describe how grateful I am to Hospice of the Valley for the level of unconditional love and care they provided” My husband, Mark, and I never thought we’d need Hospice of the Valley so early in our lives. And I wish I had reached out for help sooner. After marrying, Mark and I saved our money for 11 years. While everyone else bought homes at inflated prices, we frugally lived in a loft apartment above my husband’s plumbing business. When the housing market crashed, several people lost their homes, yet because of my husband’s foresight, we had saved enough to buy our first home. Mark Moorehead and his daughter at a fund-raiser to fight cancer. We moved into our new home. It needed work, but it was ours. We shared dreams of all the renovations we would like to make. The list was long and we knew it would take years before it would be finished. Not long after, Mark began complaining of pain in his mid-section. Being only 48, he didn’t think much of it. Eventually the pain caused him to visit a doctor. Some tests were run, and like a thief in the night, our dreams were dashed as we were given the diagnosis: Mark had stage 3 pancreatic cancer. We gave it a good fight, yet despite all our efforts, my once vigorous and strong husband began to lose his energy after the chemo and treatments. Knowing his time was short, I asked him how he wanted to spend his remaining days: a trip, a cruise, some long vacation? He said he wanted to use his remaining time to deliver on all the promises he had made to me to renovate our home. From his bed he mustered contractors, electricians and carpenters to work on the many home improvement projects we had dreamed up together. I could see this was really taking a toll on him and told him it wasn’t necessary, to which he adamantly refused to stop and emotionally declared a promise to me that he would live to see all of this through. My well-being was the most important thing to him. Eventually his condition worsened, and we were referred to Hospice of the Valley. The very next day, like a band of descending angels, an entire team of help arrived. I had thought I had to handle this all alone, so when the doctors, nurses, aides, volunteers, social workers and grief counselors came into our life, they became like family. They took over all the stresses I had been dealing with; they managed all of his medical needs; the doctors and team managed his plan of care at every stage of his illness. Over the next months, we became remarkably close with the team from Hospice of the Valley. They marveled at my husband’s refusal to stay in bed. Sometimes they’d arrive to find him overseeing some contractor’s work, or climbing a HOW yOU CAN HELP In the spirit of the season, we ask you to make a contribution today to help us continue our mission of compassionate palliative, hospice and grief care. you may donate online at www.hospicevalley.org. Or use the envelope inside this newsletter and make a check payable to “Hospice of the Valley” and mail to: Hospice of the Valley, 4850 Union Avenue, San Jose, CA 95124-5156. ladder to inspect the work being done on the roof. They had never seen anyone so determined to complete something with the time he had left. Mark amazed them with his determination and drive, despite his worsening condition. It wasn’t until the last nail was hammered on the last project that we shared a very intimate moment. I told him that there was nothing left to do; the house was done and it was beyond both of our dreams and expectations. I told him it was ok for him to let go. He passed away in my arms later that day. Words cannot truly describe how grateful I am to Hospice of the Valley for the level of unconditional love and care they provided, both with my husband’s illness, and with helping me be able to cope with such a difficult time in our life. Please join me in making a gift today to Hospice of the Valley to help other families and individuals get the expert care and compassionate support when it’s needed the most. n Page 5 LIVING EVERy MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 GRIEF SUPPORT DURING THE HOLIDAyS: PREPARE yOURSELF AND COMMUNICATE TO FAMILy AND FRIENDS By Brad Leary, LCSW, CT, Vice President of Counseling Services, Hospice of the Valley a religious service may be helpful. Some grievers enjoy reaching out to help others, such as the homeless or someone else in need, as an alternative way to spend a holiday. • Be intentional about how you plan your holidays. you may decide to change your plans. Build in alternatives should you feel differently on the holiday itself. Ask yourself, “Do my plans allow for meaningful expression and celebration of what the holidays mean to me?” Getting through the holidays is a challenge for most of us. The holidays conjure up a myriad of emotions, bundled up with all the hustle and bustle to get everything done in time. you get through the holiday season and throughout the year. While you may want to dismiss the holidays entirely, it is impossible to ignore the decorations, party invitations and advertisements everywhere. The anticipation of the season can yield great joy with family and friends at our side. yet, we know the holidays can also bring incredible sadness, frustration and anger at a world that seems totally oblivious to those grieving the death of a loved one. The key is to prepare for the holidays. We find that our grieving clients are able to cope more effectively when they communicate with their family and friends weeks and months ahead. you may be asking: How can the world keep on going like nothing has happened? How can I cope when others’ holiday cheer clashes with the way I am feeling? Can’t I just pretend the holiday season isn’t happening this year? At the Center for Grief & Loss at Hospice of the Valley, we can help Page 6 These suggestions may help you prepare: • Remember there is no right or wrong way to handle the holidays. you may want to follow family traditions or do something completely different this year. Small changes like having dinner outside your home, opening gifts at a different time or attending • Solicit support from loved ones. Friends and family want to help in a practical way during this time, but they often don’t know how. Be specific about what you need from your friends and family, even though this may be difficult for you. • Be genuine and self-accepting regardless of your emotions. It’s ok to feel sad, withdrawn, depressed or angry. And it’s equally ok when a wave of happiness and joy comes over us. The point is to accept your feelings in the moment without judgment. Remember the importance of taking a break from your grief. Give thanks for the things that you identify as good, even in the midst of this difficult time. LIVING EVERy MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 • Establish a safe place to go when you feel vulnerable. This could be at home, a religious institution, or a family member’s or friend’s home. This safe place may allow for a time of quiet reflection and perspective. • Create a special tribute for the day. Light a candle, gather some special remembrances or create a new tradition in memory of your loved one. As grief counselors, we suggest talking about your loved one during the holidays. Include the name of the person in your conversations. Others will take your lead and recognize the important role this person played in your life. “Keep each holiday as a reminder of all the things you shared with the person you loved who has died. The remembering is part of the healing.” Remember that no one has the answers for you. The wisdom of how to proceed through the holidays is already within you. Listen to your heart and recognize your limitations. Whatever you choose to do this year, you may decide to handle differently next year. Grief author and educator Dr. Alan Wolfelt says it best: “Keep each holiday as a reminder of all the things you shared with the person you loved who has died. The remembering is part of the healing.” n GRIEF AND LIFE TRANSITIONS SUPPORT AVAILABLE THROUGHOUT THE yEAR It’s not only during the holidays that those grieving loss may need help and support. And sometimes the loss is from circumstances other than death. Support groups allow participants to talk about a loss or simply listen as others share their experiences through their grief journey. Groups are offered regularly for: The Center for Grief & Loss at Hospice of the Valley can also help with life transitions that affect an individual or a family, including divorce, job loss, relocation, infertility and even retirement for those looking for meaning and purpose after a career. • Spousal or partner loss (age specific) Whether you prefer the help of a trained professional in individual sessions or you want to lean on and draw strength from others who are grieving, the Center offers support to best meet your needs. Services are provided by licensed and professional trained staff. The Center for Grief & Loss offers individual counseling as well as support groups for all ages, including children and teens. • Adult parent loss • Suicide loss • Adult expressive arts • Grieving children (ages 4 to 17) We are also available to support employers when employees experience death in the workplace or within their families. At the Center for Grief & Loss, you will find a trusted companion to help you rediscover your life and give you practical advice and support that will carry you through the grief process. Contact our Center for Grief & Loss today at 1.408.559.5600. n Support Groups Schedule (6 week groups) BEGINNING THE WEEK OF JANUARY 5, 2015 WEEKLY—Mondays: Partner Loss, Parent Loss Wednesdays: Kids Group, Senior Partner Loss, Expressive Arts, Suicide Loss Wings of Remembrance Individuals who have lost loved ones are encouraged to attend this special memorial event. December 7, 2014, 1 to 3 p.m. and 5 to 7 p.m. Hospice of the Valley, 4850 Union Ave., San Jose. To RSVP, please phone 408.559.5600 or online at www.hospicevalley.org/calendar/event/wings-of-remembrance1. Page 7 LIVING EVERy MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 NOTES OF GRATITUDE FOR HOSPICE’S TALENTED, DEDICATED TEAM We wanted to share some of the notes we received on our social media sites. Thank you all for your compliments on Hospice of the Valley’s talented and dedicated team. Services of Hospice’s Grief & Loss Center “your services are amazing.” —Leslie Leonetti “This team was so wonderful during both our parents’ last days. We were so grateful for their support.” —Terri Brittain Bland Hospice of the Valley’s Advance Planning Workshops “I am SO thankful my mom and I approached and discussed these things often for each of us and had all documents done through our Trusts. There was never a question as to what to do. Thank you, Mom, and thank you, Hospice of the Valley!” —Barb MacNeil “Thank you so MUCH for all your support.” —Veronica Iniguez “Angels! Did my grief support with Hospice of the Valley.” —Georgette Silver “They are the best. We will be calling them again when needed. They are so sweet and have so much compassion for the family. Thank you for your support.” —Helen Lopez Diaz “These people do amazing work. I know after having their help with my mother-in-law and my husband.” —Marlene Cox Leave a Legacy Making a planned gift to non-profit Hospice of the Valley is your opportunity to leave a lasting legacy for generations to come. Simply advise Hospice of the Valley of your intention to make a gift in your will or living trust. If you would like more information on making a legacy gift, please call Kathy Phelan at 408-559-5619 or [email protected]. Page 8 LIVING EVERy MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 10TH ANNUAL KENT KIRKORIAN MEMORIAL GOLF TOURNAMENT RAISES A RECORD $100,000 TO BENEFIT HOSPICE OF THE VALLEy The 10th Annual Kent Kirkorian Benefit Dinner and Memorial Golf Tournament, held September 25–26, raised a record $100,000 for Hospice of the Valley. More than 160 people attended the benefit dinner at Three Sons Ranch in Los Gatos and 100 golfers participated in this year’s golf tournament at Cinnabar Hills Golf Club in San Jose. That brings the 10-year total raised by the Tournament to more than $875,000, benefiting Hospice’s mission to affirm dignity and hope for those living with serious illness by providing comfort through compassionate palliative, hospice and grief care. Photos by CB Photo Design Studio and Elley Photography “The family thanks all of those involved for their generous support of Hospice of the Valley.” Top photo and clockwise, golfers John Moore, Jack Kent, Jeff Steinberg and Dave Hopp enjoy the tournament. From left, Jeanne Wun, John Kirkorian and Kim Brodnik. From left, golfers John Branton, Brett Kelez, Bob Kelez and Sherrel Kirk. Isidro Flores tries the mechanical bull at the Benefit Dinner. From left, friends Karen Wilcox, Anne Plane, Michelle Stojanovich, Monica Kirkorian, Barbie Taormina and Shari Williams. The Kent Kirkorian Memorial Golf Tournament was established by the Kirkorian and Brodnik families in 2005 in memory of their father, Kent, who passed away in 2004. Kent was an entrepreneur, businessman, contractor and draftsman. In his memory, the family celebrates Kent’s life and his love of golf while raising funds. “Our father’s remarkable legacy continues to live on through his family and this annual event,” said Kent’s son, John Kirkorian. “The family thanks all of those involved for their generous support of Hospice of the Valley.” “We are truly honored by the Kirkorian and Brodnik families’ continued and very generous support of our mission,” said Sally Adelus, president and CEO of Hospice of the Valley. n Page 9 LIVING EVERY MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 Hospice of the Valley is honored to serve our nation’s Veterans 24/7, 365 days a year! www.hospicevalley.org For more information please contact Vicci Wild at [email protected] or please call 408-559-5600. If you’re a veteran interested in volunteering or know of a veteran needing support, call Hospice of the Valley at 1.408.559.5600 or visit hospicevalley.org. Page 10 H o s p i c e o f t h e Va l l e y ’s Community Life Hospice of the Valley’s Community Life Program provides education and outreach on end-of-life care, life transitions, advance care planning, estate and financial planning, and more. The Community Life Program relies on the generous support of our community to meet the needs of our aging population. Please consider making a donation in support of the Community Life Program. To make your gift, visit www.hospicevalley.org. n PLANNING FOR yOUR FUTURE: ADVANCE CARE PLANNING If you had a medical emergency, who would you want to speak for you? Would that person know what is important to you about your care and quality of life? Please join Hospice of the Valley for one of our free community workshops on Advance Care Planning to help you learn how to start the conversations with loved ones, how to select the most effective healthcare agent, and the do’s and don’ts of completing an advance directive form. These workshops are open to the public and are free, but donations are gratefully appreciated. Workshop in Mandarin Workshop in English 1–3 p.m. December 9, 2014 1–3 p.m. December16, 2014 Cupertino Senior Center 21251 Stevens Creek Blvd., Cupertino Cupertino Senior Center 21251 Stevens Creek Blvd., Cupertino Facilitated by Facilitated by Sandy Chen Stokes, Karen Storey, founder of the Chinese certified Respecting American Coalition for Choices master trainer Compassionate Care RSVP online at www.hospicevalley.org/planning or call 408.559.5600, Ext. 5423 Look for 2015 workshops coming soon. Check www.hospicevalley.org/planning for details. COMMUNITy LIFE LIVING EVERy MOMENT | Hospice of the Valley | FALL/WINTER 2014 To register, visit hospicevalley.org/communitylife or contact Jeanne Wun at 1.408.559.5600. Events are complimentary. Donations to Hospice of the Valley are gratefully accepted. n Page 11 Hospice of the Valley 4850 Union Avenue San Jose, California 95124 1.408.559.5600 | hospicevalley.org NONPROFIT ORG US POSTAGE PAID SAN JOSE CA PERMIT NO. 5031 ©2014 Hospice of the Valley. All rights reserved. 501(c)(3) non-profit corporation. Tax ID 94-2803411. Board of Directors Ex Officio Professional Advisory Board Chairman Euan Thomson, PhD Chairman-Elect Jeff Strawn Corporate Secretary Rajeev Singh Art Adams Zoe Alameda George Block, MD Linda Golino, RN, BA Sylvia Katzman Linda Kramer, JD, MBA, RN Harris Meyers Sutton Roley Terry Rutledge Cara Sansonia, JD Chuck Toeniskoetter James Yates, JD President & CEO Sally Adelus VP Finance/CFO Jim Ptak Chairman Euan Thomson, PhD Brian Adams Larry Blitz Gay Crawford Elizabeth Darrow Kathleen Fahey, RN, CNS, ACHPN Jeff L. Fischer James Hallenbeck, MD Jerina Kapoor, MD George Labban, MD Dale G. Larson, PhD John Massey, MD Jennifer Ramirez James Ramoni, MSW, LCSW Paula Reed, BSN, RN, OCN Terry Rutledge Cara Sansonia, JD Sandy Chen Stokes, RN, MSN Karen Storey Ernest Thomas, Jr, MD Randall Willoughby, Esq. Executive Team EVP Medical Services/CMO Neal Slatkin, MD EVP Development & Communications Kathy Phelan EVP Business Development & Strategy Kieran Shah