deadly seven - AKAKIA Publications

Transcription

deadly seven - AKAKIA Publications
TINA PAPADOS
Look like th’innocent flower,
But be the serpent under’t.
[Shakespeare, Macbeth: Act 1, Scene 5]
Copyright © Tina Papados 2015
Published in England by AKAKIA Publications, 2015
Tina Papados
DEADLY SEVEN
ISBN: 978-1-910714-55-3
Copyright © Tina Papados 2015
CopyrightHouse.co.uk ID: 183977
Cover Image:
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2015, London, UK
Contents
Prologue [The Psychologist]
Deadly I.
Deadly II.
Deadly III.
I. Giorgio
II. Giorgio
III. Giorgio
I. Warren
II. Warren
III. Warren
I. Larisa
II. Larisa
III. Larisa
I. Greg
II. Greg
III. Greg
I. Priscilla
II. Priscilla
III. Priscilla
I. Eleanor
II. Eleanor
I. Stefano
Deadly IV.
Deadly V.
Deadly VI.
IV. Giorgio
V. Giorgio
VI. Giorgio
IV. Warren
V. Warren
VI. Warren
IV. Larisa
V. Larisa
IV. Greg
Deadly VII.
VII. Giorgio
Prologue
The Psychologist
★★
Freud conveyed in his writings that our dreams
represent unconscious wishes – they reveal all the
issues we’re afraid to express in our ‘waking’ life.
This explains why our dreams often leave us finding
ourselves in a disoriented and frightened [conscious]
state of mind.
But the problem was that none of my clients belonged
to the natural world; their dreams exposed the darkest
desires of the flesh.
★★
Everyone kept warning me about my job,
telling me it was an illness.
I’d say, the illness is in you.
[Take an apple,
and nourish yourself]
I never pick my clients, they choose me.
I suppose these seven also picked their deadly sins.
Perhaps I choose [the apples] for them.
It didn’t really matter.
My role was to bring everyone back on track.
--But these seven brought me back to the garden of Eden.
I’m a Historian, so I have this natural instinct to look back
into the past.
I often get criticized for exploiting my Frankenstein ego,
but someone has to.
My secret was, to always look into the soul of a being;
Always search for the child within.
For if you follow my technique,
You leave no room for fear.
My clients were like snakes.
I tried to nourish [them] with my apples,
yet they destroyed me.
It was insane because, well --I’m a psychologist.
It has always been a duty to keep everything under control.
I always do.
But none of them would come to terms with me.
I was undervalued, and
somehow, deprived from my counselling.
I suppose, that, was when I finally realised – I couldn’t get
rid of their deadly sins.
I could have easily replaced them with obedient clients.
But it wasn’t just that. The situation got worse.
I was somehow threatened by their existence.
One, by two [by seven];
They became parts of me.
Funny, you would’ve thought.
How a psychologist of stability and order
would allow
chaos
to take over.
But I came to quick terms with myself.
For each life that fails to obey me;
must come to an end.
Everyone always mocked me for my God complex.
--I say, one of us needs the power to pass or fail you.
“You can’t play God”, they said.
--Then I’ll play the sinner.
Deadly I
I. Giorgio
★★
Before we begin, I’d just like to confirm that I’m a man – and us
men don’t need therapy. I never needed therapy,
that’s right – I will never need therapy. You know why?
Because I know, and I’ve always known, who I was.
I am a man and us men
don’t need therapy.
Let’s not call our sessions ‘therapy’, Giorgio. It’s a simple way
of releasing all the tension without requiring you to prove
your manhood.
That surely is one way of seeing it. But I’ve always been a man.
Shall I begin?
That would be great.
I am a man of order, I am a man of discipline.
But somehow I find myself aggressively seeking for more in
life – that probably makes me a perfectionist.
Men can be perfectionists too, right?
I’ll just get straight to the point –I was always repressed as a
child.
Take me back to your childhood –where do you feel this
repression originated from?
Perhaps you were pressured by your parents?
Oh, definitely. I always saw myself as the second son they
never had. But I felt they never really believed in me,
[my Manhood]
I turned into the man I am today, and I must say;
I [primarily] became who I was, knowing that I wouldn’t
have achieved
many things -- wealth, women or success
without it.
★★
[Stefano] works less, yet he earns more {money; fame and
the best actress};
And all I am, is an incomplete man
Dissatisfied; for I can never win.
--I am so sick of this cycle.
[Stefano, my brother] earns success; a form of happiness
which I don’t think I’ve ever been exposed to.
His success was like cocaine to me;
He, being the older brother, decided to keep it all to himself
--And I haven’t had enough of it.
I HAVEN’T HAD ENOUGH OF IT.
FAME, WOMEN, WEALTH
he should have given it all to ME.
It is natural to be competitive.
I have always been aggressive at work.
Whatever I do, it’s never enough. I am unfulfilled.
I am unsatisfied.
It’s not so much about the women,
or the money --or the fame itself.
I think, it’s more about how my manhood is integrated
within all these things.
The money,
the fame
and the women.
It will never be enough,
Unless it elevates me
to a higher sense of being
to the greatest Man,
that I could be.
I think it’s time Stefano becomes long forgotten to the
world. He was no gift.
This predator instinct crawls within me and all these voices,
they keep telling me to bring his life to an end.
You need to man up to your brother
You need to man up to your brother.
I was made for greater things than greed.
I’m not going to lie – I’m filled with greed;
because that’s what all men are. Greedy.
But our Greed alone is not enough.
In my mind I always felt that even the greediest men of
them all have achieved something powerful, at least once
in their whole lifetime.
And here I am, still searching.
I must find that man within.
Do not believe in boys with shy eyes; who carry sad smiles.
Do not believe in girls who roar back at the prisoners
within their minds.
I can tell you, they are nothing but
bad actors.
-- And they have all failed.
For all these actors, they are lost
with skin that never felt at home;
so they carve it into art.
Carved skin, out of the soles beneath their shoes;
these actors keep on running.