Issue5 - John Abbott College
Transcription
Issue5 - John Abbott College
Camping at Cunninghams since 1971 Volume XXXV Issue 5 Tremblay Captures the Flag Jessica Kalmar Assistant Editor-in-Chief In the municipal elections held Sunday, November 4 th , incumbent mayor Gérald Tremblay was reelected into office, defeating opposition leader Pierre Bourque’s Vision Montréal, and Richard Bergeron’s fledgling Montréal Projet party with 53 percent of the vote. Only 35 percent of eligible voters cast ballots, which is cause for concern as to whether Montrealers have given up hope of finding an effective mayor. Tremblay had an advantage over Bourque because of his affable personality and effectiveness during his tenure as mayor. He oversaw the demerger process in 2004, campaigned to keep the Grand Prix and the Shriner’s hospital in Montreal, and saved the aquatic championships from sinking this summer. In the televised debate between Tremblay and Bourque on the Sunday preceding the election, Bourque kept Tremblay on the defensive, eventually frustrating him enough that the debate was downgraded to a yelling match. Yet upon his victory, Tremblay invited Bourque and the rest of the opposition to work with This Issue SUJAC Update, page 2 Banderflash, Page 3 The Oval, Page 4 Abstract Art Sucks Mayor Tremblay wins Municipal elections him to keep Montreal united. “ Tonight, there are no long er a former city or the former suburbs. There The Oval, Page 4 The Oval coffeehouse has provided John Abbott students with a place to smoke or to buy a coffee superior both in price and in taste to the other venues around the school for as long as anyone can remember. Closed for renovations since the beginning of the school year, it was recently reopened and now has a non-smoking policy. Now said to look like a cafeteria, it is no longer a black, smokey void, with its shiny blue walls and lack of graffiti. Today in Bander History, Senses Fail, Page 6 Page 8 News.............................................2 Campus......................................3 Entertainment........................6 Arts................................................7 Opinions.....................................8 Comics.......................................10 Sports.........................................11 the mayor of all Montrealers.” These elections were important for Tremblay, as many consider that he was only elected in 2001 in protest to the merger process, which was spearheaded by Bourque. His 2001 slogan of “It’s going to work,” reflects his four-year term as mayor, where he didn’t have any major political scandals and managed to keep Montreal’s debt fairly stable. Despite the city’s ongoing troubles with poverty, potholes, and water infrastructure, Tremblay didn’t cause the problems to get worse. Tremblay’s new mandate focuses on investing in public transit and infrastructure. Dear to most Montrealers’ hearts, he promises to spend $500 million on fixing and maintaining potholes over the next four years. Meanwhile, municipal elections were held across Quebec; 581 mayors and 4,092 councillors were voted into their positions. Almost every song you hear on the radio in this day and age is some heart-melting ballad about how the singer's girlfriend/boyfriend smashed their heart into pieces. This is NOT Senses Fail. Instead their songs are deeply based on mythology, literature, comparative religion, and poetry. They don’t write songs about themselves, or about love, because they “don’t know anything about love” and feel that they should stick with what they know. I agree one hundred percent. is just Montreal,” he told the crowd who gathered at the Science Center in the old port. “Rest assured I will be My Two Cents, Page 3 This week’s victim is Music. Now what do I mean by that? Well I came to a conclusion while listening to all the promo CD’s along with the library of music I’ve been collecting these past few years, not to mention my more than necessary visits to the used CD shops around Montréal: music itself seems to be degrading into a new dark age. Sliced Bread, Page 9 We’ve all heard that clichéed expression “That’s the greatest thing since sliced bread!”, but has anyone stopped to think that maybe sliced bread was never really all that great? Is sliced bread maybe a step backwards? It’s hard to imagine that of all the amazing accomplishments in this world the be-all and endall of our civilization rests with sliced bread. Li Kennedy Opinions Editor Being a Fine Arts student, I could not help but notice today's youth's obsession with abstract art (and emo). Yes, I am now in the second year of a program where the majority of the first year males are emo boys. Anyway that's not important. Art today is created primarily by splashing globs of paint onto a page. I call this nothing but serious excess time on one's hands. Another highly popular art method consists of using spray cans for graffiti in intricate designs. I'm sorry but we used to do this when we were twelve in the back of the Provi-Soir. Oh, and all those brightly colored circles and triangles dancing around over a black background? Yeah I did that stuff in kindergarten. In fact I think they taught us that before kindergarten. It's been proven that even famous art critics when presented with art by actual abstract artists and art by FOUR YEAR OLDS are unable to tell the difference. It's true, I saw a show on it. The name was displayed and the age was hidden, afterwards the critics tried to back up their compliments to the four year old's expertise by saying "well the contrast and the tonal values remain exquisite. The composition doesn't suffer age restrictions". Yeah, the usual art school bullshit. BANDERSNATCH John Abbott College P.O. Box 2000 Sainte-Anne-de-Bellevue, QC H9X 3L9 Phone: (514) 457-6610 Ext 5389 Fax: (514) 457-6091 Office: H-041 [email protected] Editor-in-Chief Robert J. Briza News Editor Gabe Frazer-McKEE Assistant Editor-in-Chief Jessica Kalmar Campus Life Editor Jason Dubeau Opinion Editor Li Kennedy Entertainment Editor Judy Gelsthorpe Sports Editor Joanna Lozowik Arts Editor Stephanie Quain Office Manager Nicki Fleming Games Page Editors Blayne Bradley Justin Banks Production Manager Trevor Smith Webmaster Eric Chan Over the past two weeks, I have been met with much criticism about my Ed’s note in the last issue. To those who have come to me, I can offer only the following; I cannot unprint what has been printed, and I still stand by what I wrote. But what I don’t understand is how one group of people can tell me how no one cares about Bandersnatch, that it is just some student paper and If we didn’t do it, someone else would have, and that same group can take so much offense to something we wrote. Another two weeks have passed, and I haven’t seen any of you. Hey everyone, guess what? I didn’t vote again. I will be twenty in April, and I have never voted in my life. I’m not sure if it is something to be proud of, but I never get around to it. But now that I think of it, I haven’t paid any attention to these elections. I have no idea why John Meany should or should not be mayor of Kirkland. I don’t know what makes Bob Benidetti so different from Rick Blue, except one is a news anchor, and one plays in a band...and that they aren’t running for the same thing. So why should I vote? Apparently I have a duty to vote. My name is Rob. I think that if I were to vote, I should be better informed about whom I am voting for, which I’m not. So, to me, it seems like a waste of time. If I were more informed, and could formulate an educated opin- Staff Writers Crystal De Lena Ashley Fairweather Lindsay Cotton Krystyna Glavinovic Kristine Turnbull Lauren Filiatreault Bandersnatch is the student-run Alternative Press at John Abbott College. It is published every two weeks and is partially funded by the Student Activities Commitee and by advertising solicited members. Submissions are welcome in traditionally either English or French and become property of the newspaper. Submissions must be on an IBM compatible diskette along with a printed har d cop y and MUST be in Te xt For mat (*.txt) or RichText Format (*.RTF). All submissions must include the full name and telephone number of the contributor, as well as the e-mail address if applicable. The staff reserves the right to reject or edit any submissions for length, leg ality, or clarity. Letters to Bandersnatch should be a maximum of 500 words but may see print nonetheless if they are longer but worthwhile. Neither spelling nor grammar will be corrected on letters to the editors, it is the responsibility of the contributor to correct them. Submissions and letters should be dropped off at the Bandersnatch office, located in the basement of Herzberg, H041 (across from the Hallway entrance of the oval). Good Job Jess, You Go Girl! 2 ion on who is running, it would make my vote valid. Now, here’s Jess (who is freaking awesome, by the way): Thanks, Rob! As I sit here watching the clock tick toward –and past - the deadline, I ask Rob what I can write about in my note. In typical Rob fashion, he opens iTunes and puts on some rap music: know that I was listening to The Whole World by OutKast as I wrote this. I’d like to take this opportunity to say that being Editor-in-Chief is kind of frustrating. If Rob seems grumpy, sleepy (or any other of the seven dwarves) to you, realize that he actually is under a lot of stress. So, I will attempt to reveal some of his softer side: Rob had a Fantasia nightlight when he was younger (it caught fire, and is thus no longer being used), his favourite song is Changes, by TuPac, and he has two twin brothers who are seven years older than him. Trevor – who is incidentally very awesome and helpful - and Rob are “as close as those guys from Band of Brothers” (Eric Chan and I are brothers too). Although this counters the above, I just feel compelled to say that next time there’s an election, please vote! I feel really strongly about this; we’re lucky enough to live in a semblance of democracy, so please don’t take advantage of it. Although it might feel pointless in the grand scheme of things, just imagine George Bush as a dictator. Bye…for now. Rob Says: F*ck Voting, whoever doesn't get hit by the boulder falling down the hill is Mayor SUJAC UPDATE Week 11 is well underway and we are all going NUTS! But before we get into the hectic part, hope some of you had a chance to drop into SUJAC during our Open House and get a look at our Haunted Office! There was music blasting, Fair Trade Coffee to sip while munching on an Oreo, and lots of candy given out too. But most of all, we enjoyed meeting the students who popped in to find out about SUJAC. And, to-date, 1,150 of you have signed the Grade Review Petition. In case you haven’t heard, SUJAC is working on changing Abbott’s current Grade Review system to see that the teacher who assigns the grade does not sit on the judging committee. We believe it’s in the best interest of the student that the grading teacher should be present alongside the student to give evidence and to address questions, not to have this teacher on the deciding committee! If you haven’t already got involved in being part of this movement to change the Grade Review Policy at Abbott, check outside the SUJAC Office, P-101, to sign the Grade Review Petition. Your Vice-President Academic is looking out for your best interest! Whether it bandersnatch bandersnatch comes to Grade Reviews and/or Academic Grievances, David is here to listen to your problem and to help you find the best way to work it out. If you have problems with teachers or courses, David is here to help you with your grievance. He’ll help you to work out the best approach on how to handle your specific case according to your rights and obligations. And if you want to take your case further, David will follow up on your behalf and be your advocate through the different levels. If you are not satisfied with your grade and wish to pursue a Grade Review, again, come to see David in SUJAC to find out the proper procedure to have your grade re-evaluated. SUJAC is involved in several issues at the moment to try to improve campus life, among them a Food Services Survey to find out what you think about the Stewart Hall cafeteria, the MunchBox, and vending machines at Abbott. Come to SUJAC as soon as possible to fill out the survey and give us your opinion. We’re also looking for people to represent John Abbott in the upcoming Ste-Anne-de-Bellevue Christmas Parade — Saturday, November 26 — bandersnatch to help Santa give out candies to the community kiddies, so if you are interested, drop by and sign up. Another great event coming up is John Abbott’s Foundation ‘Loonie Line’, which raises money for struggling students at the College. Watch for this in The Info so you can get involved. As most of you are probably aware, in line with a CSN-FTQ Common Front mandate for 4 strike days to be held this Fall, John Abbott Faculty Association obtained a strike mandate from the General Assembly and plans to hold the first 24hour strike on Thursday, November 17, 2005. The Faculty Association has a legal right to strike and SUJAC will do everything in our power to minimize the impact to students. (Please note that if the strike is called off, students will be expected to attend classes as regularly scheduled and will be notified through official channels like the College website: www.johnabbott.qc.ca , Omnivox: http:/ /johnabbott.omnivox.ca, College t.v. monitors, notices around the College, recorded message at 514-457-6610, and various radio stations.) bandersnatch bandersnatch As you all may have been wondering, “My Two Cents” was absent from the last issue, and before you, the reader, get too angry, I’d like to apologize upfront. Who would’ve thought that some teachers grade their homework? I sure didn’t, but now I do. Go procrastination! So during this time, I was able to come up with a brand-spanking new topic to give an opinion on. Judging from the fact that I’m sure everyone has an opinion on this topic, I felt that it would be paramount that I explained it to you in five-hundred words (or possibly more!) This week’s victim is Music. Now what do I mean by that? Well I came to a conclusion while listening to all the promo CD’s along with the library of music I’ve been collecting these past few years, not to mention my more than necessary visits to the used CD shops around Montréal: music itself seems to be degrading into a new dark age. Alright, before you go around saying, “This guy’s bashing [band name here], I’m going to go set his house on fire!” Please understand that there’s no genre in particular, it’s just the overall quality of music these days. I find myself listening to my entire collection of older albums more often than ever or searching out one of those really underappreciated bands from the 90’s at any used music shop. Now I’m not saying it’s all bad. Everyone’s entitled to an opinion. I’m just saying that I could never see one of those infomercials for “greatest hits of the new millennium!” I can’t even begin to imagine what would be on, mainly because who would want to remember a time when the music stank, pop took over (oh no I mentioned a genre) and no one cared? I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t. So looking back on the 90s, why were they cooler? Well, there was good old Kurt Cobain, Green Day when they were pop rock, Korn before they were (C)Rap, Red Hot Chili Peppers, and not to mention all those really awesome Techno bands (excluding Ace Of Bass, Vengaboys, Vitamin C… ok, Prozzak and Len were cool). Now what do we have? We’ve got Nickelback as a final attempt at Rock, The Black Eyed Peas with their “don’t lie/phunk with my heart/screw with me” themed songs, and who could forget that small fraction of No Doubt who answers to the name Gwen Stefani? I wish I could. Some bands out there are exceptions to this degradation, trust me on that. It’s just that no one knows who they are because they haven’t completely sold out yet ,or they’ve been completely overlooked, thanks to some actress who thinks she has a singing voice (J-Lo anyone?). Wintery Doom is Coming! Christina Bucci Contributor It’s coming. As much as we’d all like to think that maybe this year things will be different, the fact of the matter is that it’s coming and we have no way of stopping it. Yes, I speak of winter. This harsh reality was brought to my attention earlier tonight, when I discovered that the much-beloved speed bump at the end of my road had disappeared. The loss of said speed bump can only mean one thing: wintery doom. This morning I left the house in semi-winter attire. I braved the two-degree temperature with my toque, scarf and gloves, but I refused to bandersnatch wear the jacket. But resistance is futile, as I have come to understand this cold, pre-winter night. I can see it now: visions of sugarplums (what the hell are sugarplums anyway?) dancing in my head to the tune of Jingle Bells and Rudolph the RedNosed Reindeer. Within mere days, the shopping malls will be plagued by the oh-so-familiar Christmas Carols of mass doom, sending subconscious messages to customers, urging them to consume all that is humanly possible. But let’s all remember that Christmas is supposed to be all about family and love and whatnot, right? And winter, a time for nature to die for many moons. Ah, the irony of it all. bandersnatch 2005 - 11 - 09 Nathaniel Lasr y was my victim for this issue. Nathaniel has a B.Sc from Sherbrooke UQAM, a B.Ed from Ottawa University, and has just completed a Ph.D. at McGill University. Today, he teaches Physics, and Science: History and Methodology at Abbott; he also used to teach Physics and Magic. When not in the classroom, Nathaniel enjoys impressing colleagues, students and other people with magic tricks. He in fact awed me with a couple of his impressive card tricks. When asked about his hobbies, he also mentioned that he is a full-time bandersnatch bandersnatch dad, and enjoys taking care of his kids. “Teaching is only a part-time job, it’s being a dad that’s full-time.” As for special projects under his belt, Nathaniel will be doing a study next semester inspired by American universities, which involves answer clickers, a bit of discussion, and basically comparing primary guesses, discussing for a minute or two and then re-trying a guess. When asked for his opinion on education, Nathaniel said the following: “What makes a magic trick interesting is the fact that it is counterintuitive…‘How did that happen??!’ Science is very counter-intuitive. Relativity & Quantum Mechanics are usually seen as counter-intuitive but so is Newtonian Physics… …If we can show the inherent counter-intuitive nature of science we can make it magical. Magic is science and science is magical.” On a more personal note, Nathaniel is a friendly and amusing person and can be seen walking around the Science Department. 3 The Oval Jessica Kalmar Assistant Editor in Chief The Oval coffeehouse has provided John Abbott students with a place to smoke or to buy a coffee superior both in price and in taste to the other venues around the school for as long as anyone can remember. Closed for renovations since the beginning of the school year, it was recently re-opened and now has a non-smoking policy. Now said to look like a cafeteria, it is no longer a black, smokey void, with its shiny blue walls and lack of graffiti. You think that you’re entering PeeWee’s Funhouse when you first walk in – hiding in dark corners is no longer possible, because the lamps that once hung over the tables have been replaced with blinding fluorescent lights. But even more noticeable is the lack of smokers, the people who made the Oval the dank basement coffeehouse that it was for such a long time in history However, the Oval’s new manager, MarieJosée, and staff member Michelle said that business is doing well – the menu and its corresponding prices remain the same. The majority of its business is in the morning, when people are looking for a quick bite to eat before class. By early afternoon, groups of three or four are studying, hanging out, or playing board games as music blares from the stereo. The results of a poll asking students whether 4 they preferred the old or the new Oval produced nearly even results. In general, the long-standing student clientele voted against the Oval’s new look, while new students preferred it because of its cheerier atmosphere. Coming Soon So, bad luck if you want a warm place to smoke in the winter, but at any rate, the Oval hasn’t banned caffeine. If you’re looking for a casual atmosphere to study in, or just want to get a good cup of coffee, a muffin, or a death by chocolate drink, drop by the Oval in the Herzberg basement near the clubrooms. Lecture "Was Einshtein Right?" SPEAKER: Clifford M. Will, Professor of Physics, Washington University, St. Louis TIME: 6:00 - 7:00 P.M., followed by reception with the speaker DATE: November 10, 2005 PLACE: Redpath Museum Auditorium, 859 Sherbrooke St. West, on the McGill campus. Overflow will be at the Leacock building, Room 219, 855 Sherbrooke St. West Co-sponsored by The Royal Society of Canada, the Canadian Association of Physicists,the departments of physics at Concordia and McGill, and the Science College bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch 2005 - 11 - 09 bandersnatch bandersnatch 5 Senses Fail: Live at the Docks Judy Gelsthorpe Entertainment Editor Almost every song you hear on the radio in this day and age is some heart-melting ballad about how the singer's girlfriend/boyfriend smashed their heart into pieces. This is NOT Senses Fail. Instead their songs are deeply based on mythology, literature, comparative religion, and poetry. They don’t write songs about themselves, or about love, because they “don’t know anything about love” and feel that they should stick with what they know. I agree one hundred percent. On September 29th Senses Fail played a live show at the Docks in Toronto as part of a joint tour with Saves The Day. As the opening bands played my anticipation mounted, as did the crowd’s. The opening bands included Early November and Say Anything. Niether of them were all that good. The bassists were all really stupid looking for some reason. The front men didn’t do it for me, and the guitar and drums were mediocre at best. At least they A Perfect State of Mind Krystyna Glavinovic staff writer Raul Midón can pick up rhythmic tunes and transform them into something really amazing. He uses his guitar and his voice as if they were weapons. He claws, strums and picks at his guitar, creating the perfect accompaniment to his already ethereal voice. You know That trumpet you hear in several tracks on this album? Not a metallic instrument after all, but Raul Midón himself. His voice really is something else. I had the privilege of seeing him in concert on October 6th 2005 and watching him own the stage and entrance his audience from the beginning of his set to the very last note was impressive. Midón has been blind since birth but that hasn’t impeded his success. In fact, it has encouraged him to push further, to want to make more of himself and to strive for the very best for himself. He purposefully left the cushioned Miami scene, a place he believed he felt far too comfortable in, and moved to the tough music scene in New York in 2002. Despite all the pressure to do well in New York as a musician, his seasoned voice was picked out and admired by the very best and he’s performed more marvellously than ever before. His album “State of Mind” is comforting and emotionally expressive. “Keep on Hoping”, a duet performed with the pop star Jason Mraz, is wishful and optimistic. “Everybody”, a tribute to the brave souls of the 9/11 attacks, is emotionally charged. Stevie Wonder, a music 6 got the crowd pumped up. Or more like anxious…. Anyway, as soon as Senses Fail came on the roar was deafening. The mosh pit was amazing. Buddy Nielson, the lead singer, was ssssexcellent as usual. The guitars piercing riffs and intense progressions started up and the entire crowd knew that this was going to be a supreme show. From the first song to the last, Senses Fail kept up an intense pace trying to pack in as many songs as possible, simply so that the fans would go home happy. Playing everything from “American Death” (which is only found on the re-released edition of their newest album “Let it Enfold You”) to “187” (from the EP “From The Depths Of Dreams”), every one of my personal favorites were thrown into the mix. The only things about the show that weren’t to my liking were that they had replaced Dave (who had recently left the group) with a new guitarist that wasn’t what I’d call physically appealing and that Buddy didn’t seem to be performing at quite the same level as I’d seen him before. Of course it’s hard to put on a decent show having so recently replaced a member, but somehow they managed to pull it off. I only wish that Buddy would have done some of the crazy things that make him so endlessly entertaining. (Ex. curling up on the ground, running around like mad, and basically just rocking out) icon himself, made a guest appearance on the album playing a harmonica solo on the hit “Expressions of Love”. The majority of us listen to music for emotional reasons. Music inspires us, soothes us and energizes us. The emotional range in these 13 songs is impressive. The successful culmination of R&B, jazz and pop make this album one of the top 5 albums I can list that are perfect to listen to with your boyfriend or girlfriend. Or, in my case, pining for that blue-eyed vegetarian science student I barely know. But I digress. Information on Raul Midón can be found at http:/ /www.raulmidon.com/. There are no current listings of Raul returning to Montreal in the near future. bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch Unfortunately, our news editor tells me that when they played with the same tour here, just either one day or a few days before, they weren’t up to scratch. I have a hard time believing him, however, because several other friends saw that exact same show and they all left completely satisfied. But then I’ve never really entirely trusted his taste in live performances. In case you’ve never heard of Senses Fail, which is likely because they don’t exactly play big-ticket venues, their style of music is really quite unique. I like to think of them as emo/screamo/hardcore/alternative/metal. The reason I think of them like that (even though its such a mouthful to say) would be that they don’t really fit into any of those categories, or any other for that matter. They really are a mystery, although I can definitely hear that there is a strong influence of each genre in their music. I don’t really run around saying “emo/screamo/hardcore/alternative/ metal”, but it seems to me that there is really no other word, no matter how massive and awkward a word it is. All in all, it’s hard to say why I really like Senses Fail. It could be the deep, insightful lyrics, or the fact that their guitarists actually have talent (a rare commodity in bands these days). It could even be that I’m really just an emo kid that doesn’t know it yet. What I do know is that Senses Fail is always worth my money, because I they’ll never let me down with an uninteresting performance. It's Moshin' Time! Justin "Nibbles" Banks Assistant Games Editor I was walking into the Bander office one day and as I entered, our Entertainment editor shouted out, “Mighty Moshin’ Emo Rangers”! So I stop, do a double-take and utter the quite obvious "WTF!?" Immediately you realize that this is an emo-bashing film, making fun of every aspect of being an emo kid and at the same time being a better Power Rangers than the actual Power Rangers ever was. Having only a MySpace as a homepage, Mighty Moshin’ Emo Rangers is a fan created film made by no other than the Brits. Spoofing the first season of Power Rangers, MMER starts with five emo teens hanging out in a bedroom all doing fairly emo stuff. Cue the Evil Emperoress (not a typo) : landing on the moon, sending her minions to ruin Halloween for the teens and attacking them with the Hoodie Patrol. The teens are teleported to an undisclosed location where they are given their emo powers by Captain EmoHead. Before, between, and after is a typical Power Rangers episode, yet with the bitterness of the typical emo thrown into the mix. Being roughly only twelve minutes long, the film isn’t a huge file to download. Simply visit www.emorangers.com and retrieve the 40mb video to watch whenever you wish. Full of cheesy humor and surprisingly good Computer Graphics, Mighty Moshin’ Emo Rangers is a definite must see, and hopefully they plan on releasing more episodes so stay tuned to the site. bandersnatch bandersnatch The Bait Come live with me and be my love, And we will some new pleasures prove, Of golden sands and crystal brooks, With silken lines and silver hooks. There will the river whispering run, Warmed by thine eyes more than the sun. And there the enamored fish will stay, Begging themselves they may betray. When thou wilt swim in that live bath, Each fish, which every channel hath, Will amorously to thee swim, Gladder to catch thee, than thou him. If thou, to be so seen, beest loath, By sun or moon, thou darkenest both; And if myself have leave to see, I need not their light, having thee. My Man I met me a man so mild He's hot and cool and often wild His eyes are green his hair is brown He's sweetest when he's lying down His body flows with curving lines And sinks so nicely into mine His hands are warm upon my skin When it's his bed or mine we're in His smile is bright his tongue is wet His skin is smooth and tastes of sweat His beard is short with reddish tints His breath is sweet and smells like mints Copyright Li Kennedy 2004 Let others freeze with angling reeds, And cut their legs with shells and weeds, Or treacherously poor fish beset With strangling snare or windowy net. Let coarse bold hands from slimy nest The bedded fish in banks out-wrest, Or curious traitors, sleave-silk flies , Bewitch poor fishes' wandering eyes. For thee, thou needest no such deceit, For thou thyself art thine own bait; That fish that is not catched thereby, Alas, is wiser far than I. Scented Air when once a rose is lightly picked and once a finger slightly pricked when said rose is held to face to breathe and revel in its space time itself stops and scented air fills the body and in the hair Copyright John Donne By Fez Contributor bandersnatch bandersnatch 2005 - 11 - 09 bandersnatch bandersnatch the rose is placed, so full of grace one can forget the tiring race when such a moment comes about no one should have to live without the simple pleasures life allowed pre-disappearance in the crowd copyright Li Kennedy 2005 Define Murder Kristine Turnbull Staff writer “Abortion is murder!!!” Well, there are many opinions and points of view, both religious and personal, revolving around this tender subject. I, for one, don’t stand on either side. I am neutral when it comes to this topic. Abortion is not a decision to be said yes or no to by just one person. It is a decision based on circumstances. First off, many of us think that abortion is the killing of a young infant, but it is indeed NOT! Abortion is the loss or termination of a pregnancy before the fetus has developed into a state of VIABILITY, which means, before it has become a living being! With that being said, abortion can’t be murder unless it is the execution of a life, which as stated above it is not. A common example people tend to use when making their point, is young teenage girls that do not deal with the consequences of their actions and choose abortion. In a lot of instances, teenage girls become pregnant at too young of an age and they either have the baby or have an abortion. Some say that it is wrong and this young girl should deal with the consequences of her actions. So should she keep the baby as punishment for her actions of having unprotected sex? I suppose she just climbed on top of herself and that’s how she got pregnant? What about the girls who are deserted by their boyfriends/fathers of their babies? Furthermore, as much as abortion is said to be wrong, should a child, that being the teenage mother, be caring for another child? Is that just? More Clichés: Euthanasia Jay Dubeau, Campus Editor As long as we are on a roll with wearing out clichés, why not talk about one of my most favorite controversial clichés: euthanasia. Yes, that lovely concept which our loving pets who are suffering can take advantage of yet our very own relatives (namely human beings) cannot. I honestly see no sense in this… are we all barbarians? When your absolutely adorable two-yearold pure-bred Labrador has hip-dyslexia, and can barely walk without whimpering…you take him to see the vet, and the vet gives him a needle and puts him out of his misery. When your favorite cat has a lump of cancer the size of an orange in its throat, you can take him to see the vet, and the vet gives him a needle and puts him out of his misery. When your female hamster gets beaten up so badly by her male that the damage is beyond repair, you take the hamster to the vet and the vet gives her a needle and puts her out of her misery. Beginning to see a pattern? Now let’s compare how we treat our pets, to how we treat our fellow human beings. Your grandfather is dying of pancreatic cancer, and has to take the strongest dose of the strongest type of pain-killer (morphine not being strong enough) because he is in so much pain. He can barely breathe without a 8 There are eight types of abortion procedures, depending on the duration of the pregnancy, including: Þ Menstrual Extraction (Usually up to 2wk after missed period): A catheter is inserted through the cervix into the uterus, and suction is applied. Endometrium and contents of uterus are aspirated. Þ Suction Curettage (Up to 14wk): Cervix is usually dilated, uterine aspirator is introduced, and suction is applied, removing endometrial tissue and implanted pregnancy. Þ Dilation and Evacuation (D&E) (approx. 10-16 wk): Cervix is dilated, and products of conception are removed by vacuum cannula and the use of other instruments as needed. Þ Mifepristone (Cytotec) (Up to 7wk): Mifepristone is administered orally. Misoprostal is administered orally or intravaginally 2 days later. Þ Methotrexate with Misoprostal (Up to 7wk): Methotrexate is administered intramuscularly. Misoprostal is given intravaginally 5-7 days later Þ Instillation of drugs (Hypertonic Saline Solution) (After 16wk): About 200ml of amniotic fluid is withdrawn and similar amount of 20% normal saline solution is interjected. Uterus is irritated and begins to contract within 12-36 hrs. Contractions may be assisted with IV oxytocin. Þ Prostaglandins (After 16wk): Amniocentesis is done, and 8ml of prostaglandin is inserted into amniotic sac, resulting in stimulation of smooth muscle of uterus. Expulsion of uterine contents occurs within 24hrs. Þ Hysterectomy (16-20wk): Miniature cesarean section is performed. Incision is made into uterus and contents are removed. There are disadvantages and advantages to the above procedures but there are many ways abortions can be performed as well as, reasons why a woman or girl might have one performed. They wouldn’t have so many different procedures for the different stages of pregnancy if the only type of abortion was a teenage girl who was too ignorant to know that she shouldn’t have unprotected sex. Many countries are completely overpopulated because they do not have proper sexual education available to them . If they had the proper health expertise available they might have the option to an abortion. Wouldn’t an abortion be better in some cases than there being a child who is abused because he or she is unwanted? Think of who would be suffering here: the child. I think that sometimes, girls and women make the hasty decision to have an abortion because they do not feel like caring for someone other than themselves and that is not right. But, what about the young girls and women who are raped and end up pregnant? I suppose they are murdering too? I think that when considering abortion, there will always be conflicting cultural, religious, and personal views and that’s why the topic will never be agreed on by all. I do think that we should have all our facts straight before ridiculing someone for their decision though. To conclude, I don’t think that abortion is something that will one day be completely accepted or rejected by the population. But, I do think that women are not completely to blame. We are all put here together and are equally responsible when there is an unexpected pregnancy. heaving pain flowing through his diaphragm. What can you do to put him out of his misery? Absolutely nothing, you kill him yourself and you get tried for murder or manslaughter; you take him to a doctor and ask him to O.D. a patient, he laughs in your face and says his hands are tied by the state. So what relief does your grandfather get? Your grandmother has, not one, not two, but three cerebral strokes; the entire left-hemisphere of her brain is caput, she has moments of lucidity, but she cannot communicate in any way and her entire right-hand side is paralyzed. What can you do to put her out of her misery? Absolutely nothing; if you kill her yourself even on the ground that it was her request; you will be put in prison for manslaughter or murder. You ask the staff at her nursing home to O.D. her medication and they laugh in your face, or they accept and then they get thrown in prison for murder and malpractice. Beginning to see another pattern? Why is it that we can euthanize our pets when they are suffering beyond repair, but we can’t euthanize our own family-members who are suffering and can actually make us understand that they want to die and stop suffering? Euthanasia is among the most debated and most controversial issues discussed since the seventies and is still a hot issue this day in age. Most people describe themselves as prolife, but have those people ever begun to consider that these poor people they are keeping “in life” are suffering to the point that all they want is a quick death? Of course there are also those who are pro-euthanasia but are too chicken-shit to push for it because they are afraid the system will become abused. Ladies and gentlemen, for a system of euthanasia to work all it would take is a little effort and a little cooperation on the behalf of doctors and state governments. It could work in a similar manner to a “Do not resuscitate” order where the patient or even a power of attorney signs a document basically saying “Finish me off if I am evidently suffering and it begins costing the system a fortune for my pain-killers.” If people use a little brains and a little common sense this could easily work as long as standards and regulations are set. It would certainly cost considerably less for our democratic system. Instead of paying for a terminal cancer patient’s pain-killers for several months while we wait for the cancer to finish them off, why not just use one big overdose of pain-killer or tranquillizer and finish them off, so that they can stop suffering once and for all? Now to all you right-wing conservative people out there who will be picketing all over the cities during the next “pro-life” rally, why don’t you stop and think for one moment not about the moral issues behind it, but the emotional stress, the financial stress, and the fatigue the relatives of a person in question who is terminal and wants to die. Sometimes morality does not have a place in a delicate issue such as this, sometimes all one has to do is think a little less with logic, and think a little more with emotion. What’s more, baby-boomers are already beginning to retire, some are already getting ill bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch Today in Bandersnatch History Nobody could think of a Today in Bandersnatch History. Rob bag-tagging Justin while he was on the phone with his mom was considered, as was me hijacking Eri-Chan's phone. Later, Trevor, Rob and Justin took an oath to never bag-tag eachother again. There was an incident with both Laura piggybacking on me while I piggybacked on Rob. Yeah, the three-man piggyback. We ran down the hall. Apparently I was choking Rob the entire time. We also found out that Jess is a Nazi. And just for the record, she switching places with Rob and being in charge for the last two weeks has definitely not been a problem. Humorizer: This joke is funny because in our quest to think of something, we probably invested more money on coffee, chai tea cinnamon frappés, pizza and possibly beer than actual thought on the subject. Rob kicked a chair and told Erk to take off his pants in hope that something would happen. Something did happen but I'm not gonna talk about that. Also due to the image of three editors on top of eachother barreling down the hallway and falling halfway through. I swear it would have worked if Laura would have held on. Legend retold by Li Kennedy and suffering from diseases their immune systems weren’t built up to deal with in their youth. If we get the majority of our baby-boomers leeching off of the democratic system just because they are terminal of cancer or any other dreadful disease, it will cost a fortune and the government will end up with a deficit like nobody can imagine. More cuts will be made and we will still have a ton of suffering people. If anyone wants to contradict me on this, go right ahead; I invite anybody who has valid arguments to rebut my point of view and I would gladly read it, however. All I ask is that pro-life activists put down their picket for a moment and think through what I have said. Euthanasia is not for everybody. I am perfectly aware that certain people want to live their lives to the end because they believe in destiny, or courage. However there are a great deal of people out there who want nothing more than their lives to end so that they can stop suffering. Stop being so damned logical for a moment and think about the pain some people feel to watch a loved relative whimper or cry from the pain for months at a time without being able to do a thing about it. Then think about how easy it is to go and see a veterinarian to say “my dog is in pain, finish him off.” Do your homework and look into it if you don’t believe me, life is just that way. Until we stop arguing as a whole about pointless bullshit and actually question why we treat humans the way we do, nothing can change; and therefore we must all be self-centered barbarians. bandersnatch bandersnatch What’s so Great About Sliced Bread? Lauren Rodriguez Contributor We’ve all heard that clichéed expression “That’s the greatest thing since sliced bread!”, but has anyone stopped to think that maybe sliced bread was never really all that great? Is sliced bread maybe a step backwards? It’s hard to imagine that of all the amazing accomplishments in this world the be-all and end-all of our civilization rests with sliced bread. What is it about sliced bread that makes it so great? Sure, it’s slightly easier to reach into the cupboard and pull out two already sliced pieces of bread and make a sandwich, but at what cost? This is just one more shortcut in our instant gratification, pre-packaged cheese society. So many corners have been cut that our society is probably be more like a circle by now. It’s not like we as a race are incapable of slicing bread without a machine. If the bread wasn’t sliced it would be just as easy as taking out a knife and cutting it by hand. Although that does bring up an interesting point: safety. How many children have avoided serious injury by not having to handle large, pointed, menacing knives every time they feel like a snack? I guess sliced bread is just trying to help all the incompetent parents out there that feel that their children can feed themselves, even if it involves using open-flame burners or razor-edged cutting utensils. Unfortunately for them, sliced bread won’t help to keep kids from jacking cars or using the internet to line up dates with the forty-year old next door. Sliced bread is just encouraging bad parenting. Not only is sliced bread not so great, but it’s actually a step backward. On a baguette the crust is nicely browned and crisped to perfection, not like that gooey crap you find on the edges of the bleach-white squares that apparently still pass for bread. The crust on these breads is so bad that people will actually cut it off to avoid eating it. Is it just me, or did the convenience just go out the window? Instead of cutting a slice of bread that’s deliciously crispy on the outside, delightfully soft on the inside of the loaf, you’re now cutting some disturbingly soft, brown crust off of the suspiciously white squares of the already sliced bread. I can think of a thousand things in this world that are better than sliced bread, which is probably why people use that expression so much. Almost anything is superior to sliced bread, the list is practically endless… lampshades, chairs, pillows, deodorant, dirt, cavities… I don’t want to be a girlfriend Li Kennedy Opinions Editor So we like each other. We do. I have no reason to want you to leave. But really, does that mean you own me? What if I see something I like – can I not partake of it? What if I never get the chance again? I know I’ll never get another chance with you – you’ll be too immature and bitter to want more. I’ll do what I want. You will not constrict me and disallow me to breathe. And by “breathe”, not only do I mean have time to myself. I do also mean see other people. I may like you, but I refuse to spend every waking moment with you. There are some whom I have known and who I will keep in contact with, and others whom I have not yet known, and I will try to get them, still. I won’t make my life difficult on your behalf. I don’t care if you think it’s wrong. I don’t care what you say anymore; this is my life. Go ahead with your own life. Leave me alone. You don’t deserve to control me, no matter how much you do for me. And no matter what I do to you I refuse to believe that what I’m bandersnatch doing is wrong. I live life for me, not for you. If it gives me pleasure, I will go ahead with it. You should not affect my behavior, and nobody should be control- bandersnatch Buying Is Voting “Recycle paper, save a tree!” We’ve all heard the various terms, such as the one mentioned, used by gung-ho environmentalists and Green Peace goers alike. But, in all seriousness, we don’t need to be chaining ourselves to trees to help our planet, nor do we need to be that hard-core about it either. Daily things, such as what coffee you drink or paper you use can help make our planet a little healthier; after all, it does care for us by keeping us alive, in a sense. Many of us are not aware that our school does many things to help make our academic learning atmosphere more environmentally friendly! One example would be, the Fair-Trade coffee stands put up by our own environmental club, HEAL. Allow me to elaborate! Fair-Trade coffee is just as good as regular coffee, but can do a lot more for our planet. The more Fair-Trade and ProducerFriendly products are purchased the more pressure there will be put on capitalist companies to revise their production methods. All profits are reinvested into the community, as well as, fair salary being given to the crop workers who really need the money. This movement has been around for more than fifty years and it already involves more than five million citizens. When you purchase a cup of Fair-Trade coffee you are voting for a better environment for yourself and others. Two weeks ago Green Peace had an Anti-Kleenex day going against the Kimberley Clark Corporation because they are not environmentally safe. When companies like Kimberly Clark choose not to use recycled paper it destroys more than 80% of rain forests and ten million hectares of ancient forest are thrown away by worldwide consumers (which is the equivalent to a soccer field every two seconds). John Abbott contributes to environmental friendly production by using only recycled toilet paper, and you should too. It has been said that if every Canadian household were to replace one roll of toilet paper with a roll of 100% recycled fibers we could save 47, 962 trees! It’s not too late to get involved! The week of November 21st there will be a “Buy Nothing Day”, to go against all corporations that are not environmental friendly! Also, there will be a public display by the library by the HEAL group, which you can check the Daily Info for in the upcoming weeks. Lastly, if you would like to help HEAL, you can check when their meetings are being held in the Daily Info. (No previous attendance needed). Finally, drink Fair-Trade coffee! There will be a stand next Wednesday where you can purchase your cup of “Jo” either by the cafeteria or the Agora! Environmental friendly brands: Seventh Generation, Cascade, Doucelle, North River, Décor, New Horizon, Selection Merite, Econochoix, and Super C.. ling anyone else’s life. You are not my music. You chose me. Girls, the feminist movement was not for no reason. No woman should be considered a slut without the same terminology used for men in the same situation. Men at worst are called assholes which allows for the assumption that they are the rule-breakers and they are doing it willingly whereas the word “slut” has the connotation that the woman concerned is letting herself be used and screwing men around with her body because she’s messed up. No woman should feel bad about herself or feel dirty for reveling in the pleasures of life. No man should either. Sex, subconsciously or not. is still for some people considered “dirty”, not unlike promiscuous people. There is no point in a relationship where both parties are not perfectly happy and free. Why be tied down? Don’t tread on me. I can’t be jealous of someone until after he and I are broken up. Then it’s actually like, well yeah, that girl IS better than me to him.... But clearly if we’re not broken up I’m not going to be jealous, simply because I am confident enough to know (and you should be to) that you like me the best. And if cuddling counts of all things, that’s the least of my problems. I’m that kind of a person. And as far as only having eyes for you goes, that’s never going to happen, and you’re gonna have to square with that someday. I’ve done the closed relationship thing before, and I don’t date well at all. Chances are we spent enough time together anyways. You’ve already made up for lost time. You didn’t screw up, your only screw up is the constant vigilance crap - I don’t need you to know what I’m doing every 10 seconds and vice versa. You’re acting like my grandmother and freaking me out. I think you’re overreacting. Don’t. The fun part is the chase anyways. And how hard is it to chase what’s in a cage? Once I’ve got you, I’ve got you. Why don’t you let me go so I can get you again, and again, and again? So girls, don’t let anyone try to take authority over you, your whims are worth it, always. In the words of Ronan Keating, baby, trust your lust. You’ve got to be a bitch and get yourself out of the doghouse. Kristine Turnbull Staff writer 2005 - 11 - 09 bandersnatch bandersnatch 9 10 bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch Habs: the fight for first place Joanna Lozowik Sports Editor 23 points (on a possibility of 30) in 15 games, not too shabby I must say. Surprisingly enough, the Habs are currently dominating the Eastern Conference, their closest opponent being Ottawa with one point behind them (and with 2 extra games to play). The Montreal Canadiens took the hockey world by surprise and managed to win 11 of their first 15 games, which hasn’t happened since the 1991-1992 season. But then why does TSN rate them only 16 th out of 30 teams? The Habs victories aren’t always glorious and convincing. Nine of their eleven wins have been by only one goal, and José Theodore has yet to register a shutout. However, unlike past years, the Habs no longer have to solemnly rely on Theodore’s solid goaltending to win them games. In Saturday night’s game vs the Sabres, the Habs first line (consisting of Kovalev-Koivu-Zednik) totalled six points, with two goals from Alexei Kovalev, who now has 15 points in 15 games. But the problem lies with the defensemen. Bouillon, Souray, and Monday Night Raw opened, last night, with all of the Raw superstars collected in the ring, where General Manager Eric Bishoff announced two matches for Survivor Series; Triple H and Ric Flair, in a last man standing match, and John Cena and Kurt Angle, for the WWE Championship. Bishoff then announced the first three members of team Raw, Kane, Big Show and Shawn Micheals. While one Superstar returned to RAW, another was seemingly banished. During his opening speech, Bischoff showed footage of Edge saying that he didn’t care about RAW. When Edge affirmed this, Bischoff told him he would meet Batista in a Street Fight on Friday Night SmackDown, and him not to come back to RAW until he got the job done. Edge & Lita left to a chorus of goodbye chants, and stormed out of bandersnatch Rivet each have a goal each, but none of the other defensemen has yet managed to find the net. Even though the Habs have never relied on a big offensive contribution from defensemen, their contribution is clearly not enough to be qualified satisfactory. Players like Mathieu Dandenault and Mike Komisarek definitely need to improve their offensive skills if they desire helping the team win by more than one goal. Even though the Habs have moved up to 8th place from 16 th on TSN power r a n k i n g s t h i s we e k , i t ’s s t i l l t h e defensemen issue that keeps them away from the top 5 positions. Hopefully, Claude Julien shall be able to bring his troupes to improve on that issue in the upcoming game vs Tampa Bay, the defending Stanley Cup champions. But Habs fans should rejoice nonetheless: even under pressure, the team manages to win games. Yes, they’ve blown off two-goal-advances, but they always able to come back and steal the win. Sometimes, they even managed to snag the win from the jaws of defeat… If they continue on this path, the Habs could become a dangerous team to face, if they aren’t already. On Thursday, the Habs are playing against the Penguins, and on Saturday vs the Maple Leafs. Expect to see a lot of Leafs fans in town this weekend. the arena. Lita later returned and tried to use her assets to reverse Bischoff ’s decision, but he brushed her off a n d t o l d her to get out of the building. After the first three members of Team RAW were announced, both Carlito and Shelton Benjamin claimed they should be on the team as well. Bischoff decided to let them fight for it, and the winner would earn the bandersnatch Elsewhere in the NHL…. Joanna Lozowik Sports Editor Close to us Ottawa is still dominating. With 31 goals in the past 5 games (yes, you read right) when teams like Columbus only have 28 IN TOTAL, it seems like nothing will stop them. Will this finally be the year that the Sens won’t choke in the playoffs and go all the way? Spezza, Alfredsson, a n d H e at l e y, are certainly thinking so. Yes, Pittsburgh has finally won a game, and has added 3 more victories to the numerous losses they have suffered throughout the beginning of the season. And yes, Pittsburgh IS the team that features players like Lemieux, Crosby, and Gonchar. T hey just couldn’t seem to make it work. Out of nowhere? I mean, who actually thought the Hurricanes would actually have a successful season? They are currently dominating their division, and don’t seem they’ll be going down any time soon. Dsiappon i tments. Calgary, sitting on the bottom of their division, Colorado not being as dominant as before, St-Louis doing so poorly. The team we all love to hate.. As much as we all love to see the Maple Leafs fail, they’ve been known to bounce back after a bad start. They’ll probably do so after the return of Mats Sundin, who’s been out with an injury since the beginning of the season. They finally WON! fourth slot. Benjamin fought valiantly, but a sequence of reversed roll-ups led to Carlito using the ropes to gain the victory, making him the fourth member of Team RAW. Ric Flair defended the Intercontinental Championship against Rob Conway as Triple H watched his Survivor Series opponent from the stage. The Conway nearly overcame the veteran, but Flair prevailed with a Figure-Four Leg Lock. When the match ended, Triple H attacked Flair, and their brawl spilled through the crowd and into the backstage area before being broken up. Trevor Murdoch stepped up, claiming 2005 - 11 - 09 bandersnatch bandersnatch Other surprises K i n g s dominating their division, Nashville managing to remain unbeaten until recently, the RANGERS actually looking like playoff potential. But heck, it’s only 15 games: who knows what the next 67 have in store? that he and Lance Cade were screwed at Taboo Tuesday. Murdoch requested a Hardcore rematch against Kane & Big Show for the World Tag Team Championship, an idea that didn’t seem to sit well with Cade. Bischoff obliged, and the former champions dominated early with their shopping cart full of weapons. In the end, the power and size of the champions was too much to overcome, and after Lance Cade was the victim of a double-chokeslam through the announce table, Kane scored the pin to retain his title. ‘ Gregory Helms defeated his former partner Rosey with the Shining Wizard, and Candice Michelle & Victoria defeated Trish Stratus & Mickie James after Victoria hit James with Candice’s magic wand. Matches Kurt Angle & Chris Masters def. WWE Champion John Cena & Shawn Michaels (DQ) Intercontinental Champion Ric Flair def. Rob Conway World Tag Team Champions Big Show & Kane def. Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch (Hardcore Match) Carlito def. Shelton Benjamin Candice Michelle & Victoria def. Women’s Champion Trish Stratus & Mickie James Gregory Helms def. Rosey 11 12 bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch bandersnatch
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