Paradise Kids: A Story Of Hope

A Story Of Hope ...
Contents
Page
Who We Are
3
What We Do
4&5
Grief and Loss Support Groups
6
Every Picture Tells A Story
7
The Boy’s Group
8
Individual Counselling
8
Illness Support In The Community
9
Illness Support Holiday Program
9
Initial Ongoing Support Services
10
Parent Support Group
10
Grandparent Support Group
10
How You Can Help
11
Paradise Kids ... A Story Of Hope
Page 2
Who We Are
Paradise Kids is a Gold Coast based charitable organisation established in 1996. The
founders, Deirdre Hanna and Rev. Dr Ian Mavor OAM (pictured) wanted to create a place
where children could come to ‘help heal the heartache’ in their little lives when faced with
traumatic situations, such as a death of a parent or sibling or their
own life-limiting illness. Children also suffer grief through
separation or divorce. Paradise Kids provides group support
and individual counselling to these children and their
families.
All children grieve differently. They may express
emotional feelings such as anger, fear, guilt, repetitive
behaviour and sorrow, as well as physical and
behavioural changes. Paradise Kids understands that
behavioural problems can result in underperformance at
school and disruptions in relationships. Paradise Kids
helps by supporting the grief and healing process of both
children and parents, and by teaching parents how to
support their children who are grieving. The Paradise Kids
Programs and Support Group Sessions are held at Arundel on
the Gold Coast and Greenslopes in Brisbane.
Paradise Kids takes an integral approach to address all aspects of
the child – body, mind and spirit. The emphasis on ‘heart work’ helps children grow and heal
through their losses and, rather than repressing the pain, offers valuable life skills now and
for the future. This intervention at the origin of the loss, rather than years later, allows
children to grieve and release feelings, including anger, in a safe way, move forward in life
and face the future with hope. This results in children who grow to be mature responsible
adults who are the hope for our planet’s next generation.
Paradise Kids
Gold Coast
Paradise Kids ... A Story Of Hope
Page 3
What We Do
We Support Grieving Children
Paradise Kids has devised a unique program based on scientific research and
documentation from sources around the world on how to help children grieve well to work
toward completing the four tasks of mourning: Accepting the reality of the loss, feeling the
feelings, commemorating the loss and moving on to integrate the loss with a higher sense of
self-worth.
As well as helping children develop compassion for themselves and others we offer inner life
skills that help children move forward in life with resilience and an understanding of healthy
living. These benefits include body awareness, understanding feelings, happiness,
confidence, respect, safety for one another and inner peace that can be maintained in times
of change. The following topics give an example of the techniques used by Paradise Kids to
help grieving children.
Breathing and Relaxation Exercises: Teaching the children breath-work allows them to
have control over their own feelings and fears. The fight and flight reaction, which is part of
the stress response that grief produces, can be moderated by the use of breath-work which
elicits the relaxation response. Children learn valuable self-soothing methods through breathwork and muscle relaxation, which can aid in better sleep especially in the case of
nightmares or sleeplessness through fear.
Yoga: Breath, life-force, body and mind are connected, and yoga is a way of uniting these
parts of the human being. Improper breathing creates less life force and energy, which
results in poor health and an unsteady mind. Yoga helps increase muscular coordination,
maintain flexibility and promote good health, as well as calming the mind. Standing postures
stabilize and contain energy. The Mountain and The Tree yoga poses are designed to
ground the children and help maintain stability when change happens.
Story Telling: Sharing stories is a universal part of being human. Through stories about grief
and loss, anger and hardship and the overcoming of them through personal resources of
courage, wisdom and a supportive community, the children learn that change and loss are
universal processes. They learn that they are not alone and that other children have shared
their experience. They do a time line of their own story of loss, and hear other children’s
stories. This helps to normalize the feelings of confusion and aloneness that arise through
loss of any kind.
Movement: Healthy human functioning involves kinaesthetic awareness, which includes
movement. Movement helps to dissipate and disperse the chemicals caused by intense
feelings evoked by grief. Children learn that movement can be a form of relaxation and
meditation, such as running, jumping, tearing up paper, hitting a pillow. They realise that
feelings are in the body and can be released through movement.
Story Telling
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Art, Music, Clay: Art and Music, including the sound of tones and bells, helps the child enter
a place of awareness that transcends words. They can access feelings and develop listening
skills, and art and music can be a heart-opening experience. They relax and develop creative
potential. Different types of music can evoke different emotions and helps to bring them forth
from the deepest self. The children paint their feelings about the loss to music and also
sculpt their loss with clay.
Meditation and Visualization: These increase awareness, still the chattering mind and
allow the child to reflect on life from an altered perspective where they might find peace and
calmness. Meditation and visualization allow contemplation on life experiences to unfold.
This teaches a response to life and change in the present moment, and allows awareness to
emerge of ways of responding to new experiences.
Teddy Bears: Paradise Kids uses teddy bears to comfort grieving children or children who
are themselves living with a life-limiting illness. Teddy bears are soft and cuddly and provide
sensory warmth and touch for a child who may be grieving the death and touch of a loving
parent. Teddy bears can be cuddled and loved, and provide comfort in the night when
children can be woken by nightmares and intense grief for the person who is no longer with
them.
Memory Boxes: Paradise Kids uses Memory Boxes to help children talk about and value
important parts of the person that is missing from their life and to look forward to the future in
the knowledge that love never dies. Memories are special gifts for children in grief. It is
important for children to move through stages of their grief by remembering their loved one
who has died or who no longer lives with them all the time. Paradise Kids provides Memory
Boxes and invites children to bring in a favourite photo or objects belonging to the loved one
who has died or the person missing from their everyday life. Memory Boxes help children
memorialize and honour the part that the lost person had in the creation of former family life.
Clay Work
Teddy Bear
Healing
Memory Box
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Grief and Loss Support Groups
Paradise Kids delivers 9 Grief and Loss Support Groups each school term (with an average
of 10 children per group) to children aged between 3-5 and 6 to 11 years. Paradise Kids
conducts Play Therapy for children aged between 2-5 years in a one-on-one situation or in a
group.
In total, over 4 school terms a year, Paradise Kids delivers programs to over 400 children
who are experiencing divorce, separation or a death in the family; suffering from an illness or
a terminal illness; have seen their parent suicide; are victims of abuse or bullying, sexual
abuse or abandonment; are experiencing life in a violent domestic home situation or life in
foster homes.
Each child has an individual Buddy (volunteer) trained in Grief Counselling through our
Hopewell Educational Services.
The Grief and Loss Support Groups help children grow through grief by a mixture of storytelling, art, meditation, music, clay, anger-management, meditation, guided imagery and
support from both their Buddy and their peer group of other grieving children. With peer
sharing and support, their grief is ‘normalised’ and they no longer feel alone.
The 2-5 year age Play Therapy helps children work through their grief, loss or trauma in a
one-on-one playful, fun atmosphere with a trained Grief Counsellor or as part of a Play
Therapy Group. This results in a change of attitude, better behaviour and a greater
understanding of their strong emotions. In particular, they learn to manage anger in a safe,
socially acceptable way.
The 3-5 and 6-11 year age Grief and Loss Support Groups helps children deal with their
strong feelings of grief and guilt particularly in relation to the death or divorce of a family
member. At this stage of development children often feel the loss is their ‘fault.’ The program
provides a supportive space for children to express their feelings, including anger, in a safe
way and normalises body symptoms as part of the grief process. They learn inner life skills to
help with the healing process of grief, loss or trauma, and also to deal with future loss and
change.
2-5 Years
Play Therapy
6-11 Years
Grief & Loss Group
Paradise Kids ... A Story Of Hope
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Sharing Happy
Feelings
Sharing the Pain
Understanding
Art
Meditation
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The Boys’ Group (8-11 Years)
The aim of the Boys’ Group is for the boys to have fun, participate in physical games and
explore trust and responsibility while experiencing the company of good men (Buddy
Volunteers). This diverse group of men (the Buddies) model a form of masculinity that
demonstrates strength, integrity, compassion and respect – respect for women, each other
and the boys.
This group also teaches the boys that bullying is not a safe way to express their strong
feelings of grief and anger.
The concept is simple. Paradise Kids believes that it is very important for boys to interact
with good-hearted men of high integrity. It is how a boy learns to become a good man.
While the boys are taking part in the program a facilitator conducts a support group for their
mothers and carers.
Boy’s Group
Learning to Trust and Be Trustworthy
Individual Counselling
Paradise Kids offers individual counselling to children and adults who are experiencing grief
and loss due to factors such as the death of a loved one through illness, accident or suicide,
and family difficulties through separation, divorce or a family member’s illness. This type of
counselling is conducted in a safe, non-threatening, nurturing environment at Paradise Kids
and serves the Gold Coast and surrounding regions.
Paradise Kids ... A Story Of Hope
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Paradise Kids Outreach Illness Support in the Community
A child with a life-limiting or long-term illness creates a challenge that can exceed the
resources and coping mechanisms of the child and their family. Living with the diagnosis of a
serious illness is a stressful life event that brings many changes. It can lead to anxiety and
strong feelings for the child and their family, and can lead to accumulated physical, emotional,
psychological and spiritual stress.
Through a series of seven sessions, which have different themes, a trained Paradise Kids
worker visits the seriously ill child in hospital or at home to support them with their illness. At
the same time, a counsellor assists the parents, and siblings can attend a Paradise Kids
Support Group. The seven sessions cover the process of emotional healing through the grief
and stress associated with the diagnosis of the illness. During these sessions the child learns
to:
 Gain an understanding of their health experience as a loss.
 Share their story to facilitate discussion about the loss of their health.
 Grieve the loss of their health and feel the feelings.
 Deal with any ‘unfinished business’ around their illness.
 Claim a new sense of self and feel empowered to move on.
Children can have a wide range of emotions about their experience of illness, including
feelings of guilt about causing problems for others. Through the program, the child is
encouraged to share their feelings so they have a better understanding of what is happening
to them, have their fears alleviated and learn inner life skills to self-soothe. Other family
members also gain better understanding of the child’s experience.
Illness Support Holiday House Program
The Paradise Kids Illness Support Holiday Program was established in April 2009 to offer
families (from rural and remote areas, and other parts of Australia) with a child who has a
terminal or life-limiting illness an opportunity to enjoy a one-week holiday. While here, the
child and the family receive counselling and support to understand their feelings about the
illness and the limits it places on their life. The program includes a mixture of art, storytelling,
guided visualisations, meditation and stress reduction. The program also offers the whole
family time to experience the beauty of the Gold Coast, with its many recreational facilities.
The Paradise Kids Illness Support Holiday House has two 3-bedroom units (one with
wheelchair access) with a large communal family and kitchen area. The lovely beach theme
throughout reflects the Gold Coast ethos and life style.
Paradise Kids ... A Story Of Hope
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Initial and Ongoing Support Services
Prior to participation in the Grief and Loss Support Groups, the initial support process
provides children and families with an understanding of the Paradise Kids program. Initial
support is provided through a phone call and a 1-1/2 hour appointment to give support to the
parent and to place the child in the appropriate program (or referral to another service). This
support continues during and after participating in a Paradise Kids Program or Counselling
Session. Ongoing support to cope with life’s changes is provided via the phone or in-person,
as needed.
Parent Support Group
Paradise Kids facilitates this group for parents who have experienced the death of a child at
any age. Whether consciously or unconsciously many people hold the belief that children
should not die before their parents.
In reality, of course, life is unpredictable and sometimes children do die before their parents.
Because of these cultural beliefs, grieving parents may find that the death of a child is a
taboo subject. Friends may avoid discussing the issue for the simple fear of causing further
pain, both for the parents and themselves.
By providing a safe and supportive place to discuss the grieving process, this group
facilitates the tasks of the grief process and of moving on into healing. Through sharing their
experience, strength and hope, parents of this support group gain release and peace from
grief and pain.
Sharing helps in empathising with the pain of others, and frees us from the emotional bonds
of the past, as well as the ongoing pain of grief and loss.
Grandparent Support Group
Paradise Kids facilitates this group for grandparents who, by choice or necessity, are the
prime caregivers of their grandchildren. The aim of the Support Group is to give
grandparents an opportunity to share their experiences with others in similar situations and to
explore difficulties and solutions in a supportive and confidential environment.
The Women’s Group
Is an open personal growth group – helping women share their journey together after the 7week children’s program and their own parent support group is over.
Healing the Heartache
Paradise Kids ... A Story Of Hope
P a g e 10
How You Can Help
Help Heal the Heartache ... and help a child move toward happiness
At Paradise Kids, we receive no government funding so we rely heavily on the generosity of
community donations to “help heal the heartache of the little ones”. As a local children’s
charity, we are unique as we can offer our donors, supporters and community partners the
opportunity to be a part of the PK Family to see firsthand the work we do and the difference
we make to the wellbeing of our local children who participate in our programs.
If you would like to Partner with Paradise Kids and “help heal the heartache of the little
ones” we welcome you to:
Financially support one or more of our programs (program support is fully tax deductible).
Sponsor a child with a terminal or life-limiting illness and their family for a Gold Coast
holiday as part of our Illness Support Holiday Program.
Host a fundraising activity on behalf of Paradise Kids.
Find a location for one of the Paradise Kids donation money boxes.
Nominate Paradise Kids as a beneficiary for a special event.
Donate resource materials, e.g. drawing books, textas, pens, teddy bears, memory boxes.
Set up an ongoing donation through our Ezidebit Program see www.paradisekids.org.au
Make a donation (large or small) - donations over $2 are fully tax deductible.
Paradise Kids Donation Form
Registered Charity 1194
Please find enclosed a Tax Deductible Donation payable to Paradise Kids
Cash
Credit Card
Donation Amount: $
Card Type:
Visa
Cheque (Number)
(donations over $2 are tax deductible)
MasterCard
AMEX
(Please Circle)
Name on Card:
(PLEASE USE BLOCK LETTERS & PRINT CLEARLY)
Name on Tax Deductible Receipt:
Signature:
Address:
Postcode:
Email:
Phone:
Card Number:
Expiry Date:
CVV2 or CCV2 Code on back of card
Card details are destroyed once payment is processed
Credit Card and Cheque Donations can be mailed to PO Box 1290 Runaway Bay Qld 4216
Cash donations can be made by visiting Paradise Kids at 88 Allied Drive, Arundel Qld 4214
Paradise Kids ... A Story Of Hope
P a g e 11
88 Allied Drive, Arundel Qld 4214
PO Box 1290, Runaway Bay Qld 4216
T: 07 5574 6853
F: 07 5563 3139
A Division of Hopewell Hospice Services Inc (1993) Paradise Kids was
Established 1996 • ABN 38 890 040 788 • Reg. Charity No. 1194 • DGR
Donations over $2 are Tax Deductible
Email: [email protected]
www.paradisekids.org.au