October 07

OCTOBER 2007
Volume 21 Number 7
First Event 2008 Update
First Event 2008 planning has progressed and continued to move right along smoothly throughout September. Our Key Note speaker,
Juli Owens, was finalized and has been announced. Juli’s style of speaking will be a pleasure to hear and see. Juli is extremely active
in the Long Island LGBT community. She is a member of two Long Island Transgender support groups, the Long Island Trans Experience and the Long Island Femme Experience. Juli is a member of the Long Island Transgender Day of Remembrance Committee,
and has been an active participant in the service for the past 3 years. She is also a Board Member of LIGALY, the Long Island Gay
and Lesbian Youth Center.
As a Transgender Rights activist, she is the Executive Director of LITAC, Long Island’s first transgendered advocacy group. In 2006,
she addressed the Suffolk County Legislature on three separate occasions regarding changes to the county Human Rights Commission laws. She is a member of the New York State GENDA Coalition, where she serves as the Long Island Regional Director. She is
Co-Chair of the Gay and Lesbian Democrats of Suffolk County. Juli is also a member of the New York Association for Gender
Rights Advocacy (NYAGRA) and the National Center for Transgender Equality (NCTE). In March 2005, she attended her first Congressional Lobbying Day in Washington DC, where she met with Senators Clinton and Schumer’s staff.
Rebecca Aine has been quite busy with marketing and public relations throughout the month. Numerous cross promotions have been
worked out and will soon be posted for all to see. In a new development for us this year, cross-promotion activity is happening between IFGE, Fantasia Fair and TCNE. We are also very excited about The Marriott having co-developed a web site for First Event
2008 with Tiffany Club. Many thanks to Frances are due for her printing up a large number of our brochures for handout and promotional activity.
Wini Peterson has been hard at work with the registration procedures. Registration for attendees will be a lot easier. All pre-registered
participants will have their packets completed and ready to hand out by 9am on Thursday January 17th. It is strongly recommended to
pre-register to ensure your rapid processing at the Check-in Desk. Mail-in Registration must be received by January 12th to insure
you are “Pre-Registered” and On-line registration must be filed by Tuesday, January 15th. After the 15th of January Event Registration will only be at the Event site. Registrations for First Event have already started to come in. If you have any question regarding
Registration to First Event 2008 contact [email protected].
Jonel Peterson reports that numerous Vendors have responded to her mailings and are registering early to insure they get a table. The
Vendors will all be in one room this year providing easy access by everyone. If you have not registered yet as a Vendor, contact Jonel
soon, before all the tables are sold out.
June Casad has been receiving Presenter proposals for Workshops. She is working on scheduling so
as to reduce confusion, so those going to the Workshops will be better able to plan their days. One
exciting development is that The Transgender Project, a study on the transgender population, funded
by the U.S. National Institute for Health, will be presenting some of the results of their study on transgender people. This is just one example of the fun and educational workshops we'll be having.
The entertainment portion of the event is still being finalized. Commitments are anticipated in October. A Costume Party is planned for Thursday evening, and a revamped Fashion Show on Friday evening.
See pages 10-11 for First Event 2008 Registration Forms
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
2
October 2007
CHAIRWOMEN’S CORNER
ROSEBUDS
is published monthly by the
Tiffany Club of New
England
TCNE
P.O. Box 540071
Waltham, MA 02454-0071
781-891-9325
781-899-3563 (fax)
www.tcne.org (website)
[email protected] (e-mail)
[email protected]
(temporary e-mail)
Tiffany Club
Board of Directors
Wini and I joined Laura and Joan for their weekend down in Provincetown at the Boat Slip, and it was nice to just sit back and do
nothing. We got to see some dear friends we hadn’t seen since
January. When we arrived we were trying to decided what to do
next and we ran into Frances Cardullo who had a wonderful idea
“I’m going to the deck to sit by the pool”, well that was all Wini
needed to hear and we were off like a shot. It was a beautiful
weekend. We got to sit by the pool Thursday, Friday and Saturday
the weather was just great.
Thursday night some of us went to Napi’s and others went to Fanizzi's, after some of us
went to the Landmark Restaurant to sing along with Bobby Weatherby, a landmark himself in Provincetown. Friday night we all went to Bayside Betsy’s and a great meal, and
then headed back to the Boat Slip bar, where we sat around an outdoor fireplace, which
was in the front yard of the hotel; had a few drinks, laughed and swapped all sorts of fun
stories.
I think what made it so truly great, was I was with my wife (as others were) and we were
having a great time together, Jonel and Wini. We were all comfortable, out and about,
relaxed, carefree, truly enjoying ourselves. I also think it was great that the wives got
together. I’m sure it can be hard on some wives living with a cross dressing husband, but
to be able to go out and have a great time that both can enjoy is just wonderful.
I want to thank Laura and John for planning this weekend and sharing the profits with the
Tiffany Club. This is an experience that more of our members should have. Whether it’s
with your spouse, significant other, or just to mix and mingle with a fun bunch of Girls,
you really need to try this weekend.
Jonel Peterson
Chairwoman
Joan Hoff
Secretary
Jamie Haley
Treasurer & Membership,
First Event 2008
Chairperson
Board of Directors Election
In accordance with Article 3 of the Tiffany Club of New England’s By-Laws, the
election for next year’s Board of Directors membership must be completed by
December 31st of this year.
Therefore, nominations for Board Membership are now open. To qualify, you
must be a current paid-up member and have a sincere desire to do your part for
the Tiffany Club. If you meet these requirements, submit your name, or a
friend’s name, to the Elections Committee by October 15th, either by mail (e or
snail) or in person along with a brief description of your qualifications.
Submit your nomination to:
TCNE Inc
Post Office Box 540071
Waltham, MA 02454-0071
Or:Email: [email protected]
Rebecca Aine
Public Relations
June Casad
Sharon Hayes
Susan Bauer
Facilities
Laura Granger
Remember, nominations must be received by October 15th in order to provide
sufficient time to prepare and distribute ballots in time for the December 31st
deadline.
This is your club. Your participation is needed.
Joan Hoff,
Secretary
October 2007
PUBLISHER’S CORNER
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
3
C a n c e r ! I t D o e s n ’ t H a v e t o K i l l Yo u
by Frances R. Cardullo
Part 5 of ?
Dear Readers,
Rosebuds wants
your input!!
Weapons in my Arsenal
We are always
looking for
stories, photos,
cartoons, news
articles, makeup
tips, traveling
tips….etc.
Last month I talked about my first round of chemo. Other than the
fatigue, it was pretty much a non-issue. What they didn’t tell me is
that each round is progressively harder on your body. The effects of
my last round (third) were so much more difficult that I called the
doctor and asked him if he had doubled the dosage. He said no it
was the same. So, after a pretty rough week I set up an appointment
to talk with my doctors and basically told them that I didn’t think that
the after effects of the chemo were worth it and I was going to quit. Why shouldn’t
I? After all, I feel great the second week after chemo. My theory was that with the
chemo, I only have a good quality of life fifty percent of the time. Without chemo it
would be one hundred percent of the time but my life span would be shorter (much
shorter).
Rosebuds wants you!!!
We're interested in the following:
* poetry
* essays & short stories
* Trans news articles
* coming out letters to family & friends
* coming out stories
* tips, coming out, makeup, traveling, etc.
* cartoons
* photographs
* personal stories of
your experiences at
First Events, Laura
& Joan Weekends,
Fantasia Fairs,
Southern Comforts,
etc.
* artwork (drawings, paintings, etc.)
* calendar of local (and national) workshops and events
* book and movie reviews or recommendations
* guest writers
Please submit your work to Michael
([email protected])
Please try to keep submissions under
1000 words (unless its text from a major
news article) and submit materials in
digital format. Deadlines for Rosebuds
Materials will be the first Monday of each
month.
If your input doesn't make it in one issue,
I will do my best to make sure it fits in
another upcoming issue.
Hmmmm – now I had a decision to make. To chemo or not to chemo? I agreed to continue chemo treatments until November 16th. After that, they would do a scan to see if the
chemo was shrinking the tumors or not. (Remember, there are no guarantees with stage
4!)
I have to admit that I was pretty upset about the whole thing until I got to thinking that in
my mind I had become dependent upon chemo to do all the work and I was forgetting that
I had many more weapons in my arsenal that I could use in the battle. I grabbed a piece of
paper and started to list them. In this article, I will share some of them with you.
Prayer – I do believe in the power of prayer. It makes no difference whether you are
Christian, Jewish, Muslim or whatever. There is a proven link between us and a God.
Healing and miracles are available.
Meditation – For me this is a very personal thing. It’s right up with prayer. When I meditate I focus on the tumors shrinking and the cancer cells being excreted from my body. I
start by getting peaceful and focus on my breath (long breathing in and long breathing
out). As a side note, Eastern medicine teaches that deep diaphragm breathing will
lengthen your life. After focusing on my breathing I then transition my thinking to the
tumors.
Meditation is a great way to relax and tune out the outside world. It does take some practice but can be done by anyone.
Support personnel / Friends / Family – I can’t begin to emphasize how important it is to
have a support system in place. These are people whose shoulder I can cry on. They will
also spend time with me or listen to me on the phone. They also help with rides to the
various doctor’s offices when needed. Cancer is not something a person wants to tackle
alone.
Exercise – I am convinced that exercise is good for helping to put cancer in remission. All the articles I have read emphasize
Medical Disclaimer
exercise as part of the healing regimen. I try
to walk a couple of miles a day (to and from
The advise I give in this column is my own
work) and I also do Qui Gong.
personal experience and decisions that I
have made concerning how I choose to help
myself. It is not intended to take the place of
sound competent medical advice from a
medical doctor.
Continued on Page 9
4
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
Tasha at Worcester Pride 2007
October 2007
October 2007
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
5
Embarrassing and Awkward Moments
BY: Debra Kelly, Laura Granger and Karen Williams
fully and it turned out that the person
who had knocked on it was a lady from
the hotel maintenance staff. She got a
very full picture of Debra clad only in a
slip sans make up, wig, and dress.
It turned out that there was some trouble
with the bathroom plumbing in the hotel
and they were checking to see if our
bathroom was ok. I advised that all was
well and quickly closed the door.
Have you ever had a moment when you
have been dressed when you have been
totally embarrassed and you just want to
crawl a remote corner to hide and die?
I paid a reduced fine. However, I
have never heard the end of this
from my wife.
Karen Williams
I was attending the Shackelton
(Antarctic Exhibit) at the University
of Washington with a cross dressing
friend and my wife who rarely goes
with me while I am dressed. I had
I do not know who was more shocked or expected some awkward moments,
embarrassed over this, but Joan and I got but none actually came.
a good laugh over it.
Laura Granger
We visited the Burke Museum and the
Imax Theater, which was playing the
Shackelton Adventure. We went also
went to the Seattle Art Museum
which had an exhibit on Annie Lebowitz on women.
The following scenarios actually occurred to us and we think most of the
readers have had similar occurrences or My wife and I were driving down to
at least can relate to what happened.
Provincetown on Cape Cod to attend a
We had drinks and lunch during the
Laura & Joan Weekend. I was dressed as day so by the end of the day I was
Laura and my wife was taking a nap in
rather tired.
the passenger seat.
Debra Kelly
We went home and I took off my
We were driving on Route 6 in Eastham, clothes and had put on a sweat suit. I
I was staying at the Ramada Inn in Hyan- Massachusetts and apparently I was oper- still had on my make up and hair.
nis, Massachusetts in December 2001. I ating over the speed limit since we were
was attending the Innvestments Christpulled over by a police officer.
I heard the doorbell ring and I went to
mas party and was sharing a room with
answer it since my wife was on the
Joan Hoff.
Before the officer came to the car, I de- telephone.
cided to wake up my wife and let her
The party was starting at about 7PM so I know what was going on otherwise she
The only person that rings the doorwas in the process of getting ready. I had might have had a heart attack, or at least bell is my next-door neighbor who is
just finished showering and shaving. I
I thought that. When I told her we were the cross dresser that I went out with
was clad only in my panties, pantyhose, being stopped she went spastic. “ I told
earlier. Fully expecting her, I opened
bra and slip. I was waiting for the facial you not to drive that way. Now it will be the door and I discovered it was the
moisturizer to set in my face before I
in the newspapers.” oh my god, oh my
housekeeper that has been cleaning
started to apply makeup.
god, what will we do”.
our home for the last several months.
She knew who I was and she started
I heard a knock on the door to our room. The officer came to the car and asked for talking. I was so surprised that I was
I assumed that it was someone that knew my license and registration and did a tri- somewhat tongue-tied.
Joan or myself since many of us were
ple take. He kept looking at the photo on
staying at the hotel.
the license and then at me. He finally
I was thinking should I say what was
I went to answer the door since I was the advised me that I was speeding and isgoing on, but by the time I was going
close to it and since I figured we were
sued me a citation and sent me on my
to tell her, She had left.
among friends, I did not have to take ex- way.
tra precautions such as putting on a robe
I was mostly embarrassed to be seen
or coat to cover up. I opened the door
I went to court to fight the citation. No
in such an ugly sweat suit.
mention of my being cross-dressed.
6
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
Rebecca Shafir
M.A. CCC
Voice Feminization State-of-the-Art
978 287-0810
My background as a speech/language
pathologist and voice coach gives you the
most effective voice therapy approaches
to date including voice analysis, computerized feedback, ear training and mind/
body vocal training strategies.
THE TRINITY OF BEING:
OF BEING MASCULINE,
OF BEING FEMININE,
OF BEING ONE,
WITH YOURSELF
AND NATURE!
October 2007
October 2007
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
CALL FOR PRESENTERS and WORKSHOPS for First Event 2008
The Tiffany Club of New England (TCNE) is pleased to announce that the 28th Annual First Event will be held on January 16 – 20, 2008 at the Marriott Boston Peabody
Hotel, Peabody, MA (1-978-977-9700).
We are seeking proposals for presentations and workshops that would address the
needs and interests of all segments of the transgender community. It is our hope that a
highly diverse cross-section of the transgender spectrum will be presenting and attending. So please feel free to propose new ideas and find ways to creatively expand our
horizons.
This year we will be running presentations in tracks or interest areas to make it easier
for attendees to schedule their day. The tracks are likely to include the following:
crossdressers, FtM, MtF, Family/SO’s, transition support, medical/surgical information, standards of care and
emotional support. This is not meant to be a complete or exclusive list, so feel free to suggest tracks or topics
that you believe would be of interest to our community.
If you would like to present or run a workshop, please submit a proposal on the attached form to First Event by
November 1, 2007. Please use the attached form as it will help us to coordinate all the seminars.
We will be accepting proposals after this date, but cannot guarantee that your workshop will be included in the
program guide after that. If you are submitting multiple proposals, please file a separate form for each. For
more info or questions, E-mail us at [email protected]
7
8
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
October 2007
The FtM Corner
The purpose of this Corner is to allow TCNE and Transmen the
chance to get to understand each other better.
So here it is guys, our own corner of the world. Have an idea, website
to feature, etc...send it my way. Ladies, this is also your chance to get
to know us better, what life is like on our side of the fence. If you have
any questions regarding FtMs/ Transmen, please send them to me
at :[email protected].
"Best Advice for FtMs just starting out".
1) You are not Alone in this journey.
2) There is no blueprint to Transitioning. Do not let anyone tell
you how to transition.
3) You can change your mind. If you start off feeling that you
won’t ever go on hormones, you are allowed to change your mind.
4) Don’t lose your sense of humor.
5) Practice or Learn Patience.
6) Passing is easier than you think.
7) Hormones, will be there when you need and want them.
8) Once you start taking hormones, be patient. Give them a
chance to work.
9) Transitioning is not a race.
10) There is no such thing as a dumb question, so ask as many
questions as many times as you need to, until you get the answers
your comfortable with.
11) A lot of people in your life, including your parents will have a
hard time with this. You most likely didn’t come to terms with
this overnight, neither will they. Give them time.
12) When it comes to transsexuality, people will ask plenty of
stupid and legit questions. You are under no obligation to educate
anyone.
13) If you don’t mind answering questions. You are allowed to
set limits on what questions you will answer. I have told many
people if the first question they are going to ask is what I do in my
bedroom,.. To not ask me another question.
14) Your identity is not up for debate, let alone a floor vote from
family, friends or others in the community.
15) There is no transsexual blueprint or checklist. Your mannerisms, sexual partners, relationship with your body, and desire or
lack of desire for whatever medical procedures you want or don't
want is entirely up to you.
16) If someone calls you the wrong pronoun, CORRECT them!
This corner will be hosted by
Michael West
Loren Cameron
Alan Hart
http://www.mangoproducts.net/
October 2007
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
9
Continued from Page 3
Proper nutrition / Diet – Most of you know by now that I have been on a vegan / raw
diet. Not only has this helped me to loose weight (which is good) it has also provided
me with the nutrition that I need to boost my immune system as the chemo destroys it. In
the end, I believe that my immune system will do as much or more than chemo to route
out the cancer.
Fluids – Drinking lots of fluids is important as it helps to flush out your body. I especially drink a lot of fluids the day before chemo, the day of and several days after. This
consists of two liters of water. Coffee, beer, wine, tea, etc. do not count as a proper fluid.
Not even fruit juices. The best thing is filtered water.
Positive Thinking - This is a big one. I am convinced that my cancer will go into remission in spite of what the doctors have told me. (They are not being negative but just realistic). I continue to be up-beat and work at visualizing the tumors shrinking. The mind is
a very powerful thing. If one is convinced that they will die from cancer (or what ever)
chances are very good that they will.
Alkalizing – The body is either acid or alkaline or some where in between. It has been
said that cancer can not live in an alkaline environment. Briefly, all meats, dairy, coffee,
alcoholic beverages are acid forming. Asparagus, broccoli and most green leaf vegetable
are alkalizing. I try to stay on the high end of alkaline. There are urine test strips to test
where you are. There’s a book out entitled “Alkalize or Die”. You can look for it on
Amazon.com or contact me.
Supplements – These are an important part of the treatment for keeping my body
healthy. I am on a program of supplements that was designed for me by the Hippocrates
Health institute. I could write a whole article on supplements alone. Suffice to say, they
are important.
Wheat Grass Juice – You may think that this is a supplement but it is so powerful that I
list it separately. Wheat Grass Juice is a powerful booster to the immune system and the
blood (that chemo tries to destroy). Here too, books have been written about wheat grass
juice. Google it and you will get more information than you will know what to do with.
Oxygen therapy – This is one that I do use, I sleep with 98% oxygen from an oxygen
concentrator. Cancer can’t live in an oxygen rich environment. I have yet to do a hyperbaric chamber but I will soon.
Chemo – I put this on this list because I am on a chemo regimen now. Everything else
that I have mentioned I consider to be an alternative modality. Chemo on the other hand
is barbaric. It works by putting poison into my body with the hope that it will do more
damage to the cancer than it does to my other organs and systems. I call it barbaric because the doctors poison me with chemo then give me the antidotes for the side effects. I’m still not convinced that after billions of dollars in cancer research that all medical science has to offer is “slash – burn & poison”. (Surgery, Radiation and Chemo)
As I said in the beginning, I have many weapons in my
arsenal. I’m sure there are many more but these are the
ones I know of and I am personally using.
God Bless You,
Hugs,
Frances
Now you can have your own
personal private mail box at
The club
has received
a private
mail box
from one of
our elders,
Laura
Granger.
With this
box you can
have your
own personal, private mail box address at the club.
You will receive your own key.
There are 20 letter size boxes and 4
large boxes available. This is another
service of your club.
Now you can have an address for
your femme name at the club. For
more information call or visit the club
on a Tuesday night.
The Board of Directors recently set
the private mail box fee at $75 per
year with a key deposit of $25. This
is less than $7 per month for a private, discrete mail box.
Another membership benefit
from your club.
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
10
October 2007
First Event
Registration
Form
TCNE, COMPASS OR MPTC2008
Member
- Member
Number _______________________
Event
Price
Full Event Package Special till Nov 1st
Qty
Event
Price
Qty
$ 288.00
*Member Full Package Only until December
$ 305.00
31st
Friday Workshops
$ 30
**Early Registration Full Package Only until
$ 305.00
December 10th
Friday Fashion Show
$ 55
Wednesday Night Pool Party
$ 30
Saturday Workshops
$ 30
Thursday Workshops
$ 30
Saturday Night Awards Banquet,
featuring our Keynote Speaker
Beef Chicken Veg
$ 65
Thursday Night Dinner and Costume Ball
$ 55
Sunday Brunch
$ 25
Optional Event: Wednesday Night at the Theater – Lyric Stage “Adrift in Macao”
Ticket and Transportation
$ 70
*Members Only
** Non- Members
Sorry no discounts on Partial Packages.
$
TOTAL
Name (s) You Wish To Be Registered Under & For Badge
Adopted Name:
Name of Spouse or S.O.
Credit Card
Check One
Card Type: (Check One)
Card Number
Name Printed on Card
Signature
Master Card
Payment Method
Check
Cash
Credit Card Information
Expiration Date (MM/YY)
Visa
Money Order
Mailing Address For Confirmation Letters
Mailing Name:
Address:
Address:
City:
E Mail Address:
Use E Mail only for confirmation:
State:
Yes
No
Zip Code:
Doesn’t Matter
Contact Information
Phone Number (In case of a problem)
Best Time to call you
Name to Address you as on phone:
Complete this form and return to:
TCNE Inc., First Event 2008, PO Box 540071, Waltham, MA. 02454-0071
No Reservations will be honored without PRE-payment; Registration forms received after 12/30/07, will be subject to availability.
No Cancellations will be accepted after 12/30/07. All cancellations, subject to a 10 % handling charge.
Make Checks payable to: TCNE, Inc.
If paying by credit card please remember to sign Form, Incomplete forms will be returned to sender.
Note: If paying by credit card, you may FAX this to: 1-781-899-3562
Please note: That any information supplied by you to us for our event is strictly for the use of TCNE And will
not be shared with any other groups or organizations. Your Confidentiality is of extreme importance to us at TCNE.
October 2007
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
11
2008 First Event Registration Form
Cost Totals
(1). Registration(s): Here you would enter the number of people registering for our event (Example: Yourself, yourself and
your spouse, yourself and a friend), multiply that by the cost of the event and enter that total in the total box to the right of
registrations(s). The theater is optional and the cost is for the tickets and transportation. We meet at 5:00 PM in the lobby to
go to dinner (price not included) and then to the theater.
Payment Method
(1). Here you simply check the box that indicates the payment method that you are using.
(TCNE, Inc. only accepts MasterCard or Visa, (we can’t accept any others.)
Credit Card Information
(1). The first line is where you would indicate the type of credit card that you will be using by checking either MasterCard or
Visa. (TCNE, Inc. only accepts MasterCard or Visa no others) After indicating either MasterCard or Visa, you should enter
your credit card number in the box to the right.
(2). Expiration Date: on this line you should enter the expiration of your credit card as it appears on your card.
(3). Printed Name: on card On this line you should enter the name printed on your credit card just as it appears on your
credit card.
(4). Signature: on this line is the area that you must sign your name (Not type it!) After you have completed the rest of the
form and printed it out.
Hotel
Contact the Hotel and make your reservations directly with them. Marriott Boston Peabody, 8A Centennial Drive, Peabody,
MA Phone: 978-977-9700 or Toll Free at 877-901-2083 or online at: www.marriott.com.
Mailing address for confirmation letters
(1). Mailing Name: Here you should enter the name that you want us to use to send a confirmation letter to you from us as
for our event.
(2). Address: Here you should enter the address that you wish to receive confirmation letter to you from us as for our event.
(3). City: Here you should enter the City that you wish to receive confirmation letter to you from us as for our event.
(4). State & Zip: Here you should enter the State & Zip code that you wish to receive confirmation letter to you from us as for
our event.
(5). E Mail Address: Here you should enter your E Mail Address if you would prefer that we only use that for confirmation
letters to you please indicate that by checking the "Please only use E mail" box to the right of the information block. If it does
not matter what address we use for confirmation letters, enter both your snail mail address and your E Mail address and
leave the "Please only use E mail" box empty. If you don't want to receive confirmation letters by e mail leave the E Mail
address block empty and enter only your snail mail address.
Contact Information
(1). Phone number: Here you would enter the phone number that you would like us to call you at.
(2). Best time to call: Here you would enter the best time to reach you at the number you give us.
(3). Name to use: Here you would enter the name we should ask for should we need to call you. Some people may not want
us to ask for them by their adopted name, so, if that is the case let us know what name to ask for you by. We will only ID
ourselves as TCNE, Nothing else, unless instructed by you otherwise. If you wish us to “ID” ourselves as something other
than TCNE, please indicate that in this block as well. (Please note: "Contact Information" is optional, unless you are trying to
register for our event after the deadline date of 12/30/07. After that date it is required, as room availability will be on a
day-to-day basis. )
(4). Contact information (Your phone number) is a good thing for us to have while planning this event even if you are not
trying to register late, if you would like us to have this information, please feel free to enter that information here. We will not
call you unless it is necessary!
Please note: That any information supplied by you to us for our event is strictly for the use of TCNE And will
not be shared with any other groups or organizations. Your Confidentiality is of extreme importance to us at TCNE.
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
12
October 2007
Tiffany Club now accepts PayPal for all
payments for events!
You Are Not Alone Group…
Tiffany club now accepts PayPal payments for all events and activities, including First Event 2008 and memberships! Pay us by
PayPay by making payments to
[email protected]
A service of Worship, Hospitality
and Good Fellowship for
Lesbians, Gays, Bisexuals, Transgendered
and Straight
Adults, Youth and their families, friends
and all who desire to worship where
ALL God’s children are Welcome.
Meeting each Sunday at 5:00 pm
at
Grace United Methodist Church
56 Magazine St
Cambridge, MA 02139
Mission Statement
Cambridge Welcoming Ministries is an open and affirming,
progressive faith community dedicated to proclaiming God’s
love for all with gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered, and
straight persons.
Rosebuds
Readers are
your
Customers
Interested parties should
contact the editorial staff
at:
The Tiffany Club of
New England, Inc.
(TCNE)
P.O. Box 540071.
Waltham, MA.
02454-0071.
Ask for a copy of our
rate card. Or email us
at: [email protected]
Is held the first and third Thursdays of the month.
It is NOT a drop in group. You must be interviewed first before being admitted. For more information, please call TCNE Tuesday nights or email us at: [email protected]
October 2007
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Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
Grace United Methodist Church
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Cambridge
617-491-3753
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Gender ID Card
NUMBER
012345678
DATE OF BIRTH HEIGHT SEX
06-19-1940
5-10
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14
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
October 2007
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Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
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15
16
FoRCC for Friends
By Rebecca Aine
Used with permission
One is taught by experience to put a premium on those few people who can appreciate you for what you are" - Gail Goodwin
Gail Goodwin's quote may well be the story
in one line of the transgender social and
support group, the Friends of Randolph
Country Club (FoRCC). This group, in
existence for ten years, has typified that
quote: appreciating others for what they are
not for who society believes they should be.
Yvon Steel and June Casad are two of the
founders of this long standing group. We
caught up with them in the midst of their
most recent event at The Randolph Country
Club in Randolph, Massachusetts to learn
more about this group and how their unique
history is a part of the history of the transgender community in New England.
BECK'S CAFE: I'm glad we could finally
get a chance to talk in the midst of this busy
Fall season for you both.
YVON: Busy is right, with our event and
so many others taking place in the Fall, life
can seem like whirlwind
JUNE: We try to float through it. It's busy
but fun no question about that.
BECK'S CAFE: Can you tell our readers
how the Friends of Randolph Country Club
started?
YVON: FoRCC, as we like to call it, or the
Friends of Randolph Country Club. We've
been around continuously for ten years at
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
October 2007
Friends of Friends Landing and was out at
least, since about 1997. It was originally
started by a woman named Holly then when Friends Landing, in Haverhill, MA like we
mentioned. We used a Yahoo Group for all
she left ownership was handed over to
of us to build connections outside of those
meetings and stay in touch. In many ways,
Diane, June, Brenda, and I came in later.
the Yahoo Group became the The UnoffiWe originally started meeting at Friends
Landing in Haverhill and kept our connec- cial Friends Landing Message board. And it
was a way to get people to know what was
tions alive through the use of a Yahoo
happening in each of our lives and who was
group. The Yahoo group was a great tool
for all of us to collaborate together and keep going to go to be together at Friends Landing. Once in a while we'd do a roll call to
the group as a group. Actually the groups
create a more structured kind of meeting.
original name was FoF or Friends of
But the evolution was more of one of closFriends Landing.
eted strangers who all came out to become
BECK'S CAFE: Ten years is a long time, it friends.
may be that only Tiffany Club of New EngJUNE: I'd agree. Over time what was just
land has had a longer existence. What do
you think is the reason the FoRCC Commu- transgender people meeting in person and
communicating online grew as friendships
nity has been able to last this long?
grew. It's really a story of people isolated in
JUNE: FoRCC is really organic and
their experience who became people conchanges over time. With a lot of other
nected in a shared experience of being transgroups that have come and gone, usually
gender. They made friends at Friends Landthey get a big splash right away and are
ing, grew into using the Yahoo Group to
really driven by one person with a vision
communicate and spilled out into real life.
and energy to make it happen. FoRCC on
The Events weren't all done at Friends
the other hand, while it began with Holly's Landing but sometimes happened at Jacques
vision, it never really had to rely on her sin- Cabaret or MANRAY. And that's the intergular person to make it happen. It was a sort esting point. The group became interelated,
of infectious need the transgender commu- invited others in, accepted them for what
nity felt and got behind. We never had a
and who they are, and ended up having fun
lot of rules or moderating either in our
in the process.
group meetings or in our online Yahoo
group. It's just been a place where people
YVON: Really the group grew and grew
have felt safe to come out. And we've aland became the focal point for THE Transways supported people who have done that. gender SCENE in New England then one
day it was gone. And it was really the result
YVON: That's true June. We found that
of one unfortunate incident.
our group culture just thrived on being more
relationally in touch. It became clear to us BECK'S CAFE: You know, this "incident"
that we were less "leaders" in the group as
is the stuff of folklore. What was the incimuch as we were "facilitators" of this
dent and how did it not only effect FoRCC
group. We saw that too many rules and one but what were it's effects, in your opinion,
person in charge would stifle what was
on the transgender scene in New England in
blossoming. We never wanted to have that. general?
As long as people were respectful of each
other anything was okay.
YVON: Well, at one point, Friends Landing became very trans-unfriendly and they
JUNE: We have never tried to moderate the instituted what amounted to a "vagina
content of our Yahoo Group or our in percheck' for the ladies room and people just
son meetings but when things have been
stopped going. You know, as transgender
deemed offensive and disrespectful we just women, we present as women and using the
simply squash what is happening and move right bathroom is a big
on.
deal. One key part of
it is safety for us. UsBECK'S CAFE: How would you say that
ing a men's bathroom
FoRCC has evolved over it's 10 year life?
presenting as a woman
could put us in
YVON: Well, FoRCC started as FoF,
physical harm.
Continued on Page 17
October 2007
Continued from Page 16
JUNE: I remember times at Friends Landing when bouncers would swarm t-girls if
they felt what they wore for clothing was
inappropriate even. They would harass
someone like that out of the club. I had to
intervene in one case. And then on St. Patrick's Day 2005 the transgender community
walked away from Friends Landing; tired of
a GLBT club that had rejected us.
BECK'S CAFE: With that "walk out" certainly there must have been some sense of
displacement or abandonment?
JUNE: Well, with the end of the relationship between Friends Landing and the transgender community something had to fill that
void. So, a sort of entrpereneurial spirit was
unleashed from the split and some new
groups started forming. One of those was
The Girl's Night Out group, or GNO for
short, which began in Manchester, New
Hampshire. GNO's approach was to provide a safe space for gender expression and
have, as the founder, Maxine, was fond of
saying, "The Courage to be Free". Many
girls did end up gravitating to GNO and
GNO had a big, positive impact on the New
England Transgender scene allowing many
transgender women to come out and be free
to be themselves.
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
JUNE: And we've done just that. We plan
events with them for about every six weeks,
we communicate with the RCC team, and
we have our event. This has resulted in a
benefit to RCC, to FoRCC and to the transgender community overall. We had to inYVON: This was a BIG surprise to all of us. sure that we would be good patrons and
good contributors to the benefit of RCC.
JUNE: I agree, I was expecting an attitude The reception that the management and patrons now give the trans community has
and had a hard time going in. But I was
bound and determined to go there and even been overwhelmingly supportive and nice.
Even the bathroom is a non-issue.
to use the ladies room. I didn't feel like I
had my begging bowl out. We were transgender and this was a GLBT club and that
BECK'S CAFE: So, every six weeks
was that. I had a right to be there and so I
FoRCC has a transgender party at RCC and
went.
you've been doing this all told for 10 years.
What keeps you doing this?
YVON: In a way the Friends Landing incident did us a favor. They got us out into the JUNE: I remember what it was like to not
world MORE.
have a place to go and in feeling isolated
and alone. To the extent that I can provide
JUNE: Yes that's right. That was the year
an opportunity for others to come out and be
we started going to other GLBT and
themselves and really, to lead much healthStraight clubs that welcomed us. We
ier lives, that's what motivates me.
learned we could come way out of the closet
and just be ourselves.
YVON: My personal satisfaction is to produce something and watch it grow and see
YVON: When we came back to Friends
the results. The fruit is in the smiling faces;
Landing they were so happy to have us
they are smiling not because they are drunk
there they put our name and a big picture of but because they are getting a chance to be
us on the front of their web page, "Welcome who they are. It's my chance to get out and
back T-Girls" We returned in March of
I'm having a great time and I want others to
2006, we had some big parties there and
as well. I don't want it to stop I'm having
things were really cranking along fine until fun!
the 2006 Halloween party. It was a packed
house and then on the Monday after the
© 2007 Beck's Cafe,
Halloween, with no notice, Friends Landing http://www.beckscafe.com
closed it's doors and was sold.
Some felt the same way, but not in general.
I really felt that I deserved to be there but
the good part about it was that the management had changed over the year and Friends
was very welcoming to us.
YVON: FoRCC, or FoF at the time, needed
a new place and we approached the Crowne
Plaza in Woburn, and they suggested Friday
Night. At the time, GNO wanted to merge
with FoRCC (or FoF) group. We felt our
group's unique character and identity was
still alive due to the real life relationships of BECK'S CAFE: So then Randolph Country
people that grew out of this one little place. Club came into the picture?
JUNE: That's right, many of us with FoRCC
(FoF at the time) wanted to continue our
group and keep it alive. The Yahoo Group
kept us communicating and loosly together,
as it had always been, we just needed to find
a physical place. We weren't against GNO,
we just felt we had a unique group.
17
JUNE: Well that took work. Randolph
Country Club, RCC, a premiere GLBT
country club and dance club, had a bad relationship with the transgender community up
until that point.
YVON: I visited them a couple of times to
outline what we were trying to do and what
BECK'S CAFE: So did FoRCC every find a the benefits were to them. They told me that
their relationship with the transgender comnew place to meet?
munity had soured primarily due to lack of
follow through on the transgender commuYVON: We were alive, still looking for a
home, and in March of 2006 the group was nities part. It was common for transgender
women in our community to plan an event
having a lot of hang wringing about going
back to Friends Landing after the year long with them and then not to actually hold the
event or communicate about it. I had to
walk out.
convince them that the community was honorable and could be trusted.
JUNE: Friends Landing was part of my
journey and I felt I had a right to be there.
18
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
“Transgendered
people need to
know that they
have options, they
also need to know
those options may
offer as much burden as they offer
promise.”
October 2007
The Tiffany Club
Yahoo Group
TIFFANY CLUB YAHOO
GROUP BREAKS
300 MEMBER MARK!!
Join us,.. meet new friends, share
resources and more.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/tiffanyclub/
October 2007
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
19
Laura & Joan’s “5 Star Provincetown Weekend
By Joan Hoff
As the guests were leaving the 13th Annual Laura & Joan “5 Star”/
Tiffany Club Weekend, the universal comment made was, “I hope
you will have this
weekend again next
year.” Must be that
everyone had a good
time.
The Laura & Joan gala
weekend began on
Thursday evening with a cozy pizza party at the Boatslip Hotel. Nothing like delicious pizza, cold tonic, and warm friends to start the
weekend festivities.
On Friday, after a leisurely continental
breakfast provided by the hotel, a breakfast where the friendship
was more important than the coffee, the tourist activities took off
with a vengeance; shopping, sightseeing, the whale watch, just to
name a few.
Friday evening though,
the atmosphere
changed. We celebrated an ice-breaker,
reacquaint Champagne
Cocktail party at the
Boatslip Lounge. This lasted till late at night, with a break for dinner
at restaurants of our choice, at the open air section of the lounge. The
weather couldn’t have been better. Conversations and drinks were
first class.
The grand finale was
Saturday with a fabulous banquet at the renowned Bayside Betsy’s
Restaurant. Thirty six of us enjoyed the excellent meals and the camaraderie. Frances Cardullo donated a gift basket from her store in
Harvard Square which was raffled off after dinner.
Now you know why the guests asked about next year.
Also, next month’s rent was paid by the surplus from this event.
20
Rosebuds - Tiffany Club Newsletter
EVENTS
SUN
MON
1
OCTOBER 2007
TUE
2
October 2007
WED
3
THU
FRI
5
4
Open
Meeting
8
7
9
Columbus
Day
14
21
28
Daylight
Savings Time
Ends
15
Board
Nominations
Deadline
22
29
11
12
13
19
20
You are not
alone meeting
Open
Meeting
17
18
Open
Meeting
23
Open
Meeting
Board Meeting
Too
30
Saturday Nights
at TCNE
24
25
You are not alone
meeting
31
Open
Meeting
6
Saturday Nights
at TCNE
10
16
SAT
Halloween
26
27