June 2013 - Outreach NC

Transcription

June 2013 - Outreach NC
utreach NC
OutreachNC • June 2013
Outre
ac
r v ic e s
Aging
JUNE 2013
1
Vol. 4 Issue 6
Navigating all your lifestyle choices
A Passion
for Music
An Evening with
Harry Connick Jr.
at Booth Amphitheatre
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OutreachNC • June 2013
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From the Editor
une means summertime is here.
Vacations, backyard barbecues
and swimming pools all beckon
for your attention, so we thank you for
spending some of your time with us!
If a summer concert is part of your
plan, look no further than Cary's Booth
Amphitheatre on July 9 to spend "An
Evening with Harry Connick Jr." The
talented pianist and composer is
bringing some old and new tunes.
He shares the inspiration for his latest
album as well as his love for his family
and his passion for music.
WIOZ 550 AM's Billy Bag-O-Donuts
has a love for doo-wop and wakes
up listeners weekday mornings in the
Sandhills. We sit down with Billy for a
Carolina Conversation to learn more
about the man behind the microphone
with a heart for his community.
One place you can find community
spirit is at your local farmers market.
We'll introduce you to farmers from
Wake, Montgomery and Moore
counties, all of whom harvest the
freshest bounty (as seen above).
At Paradox Farm in West End, we
learn the finer points of using fresh
goats' milk for cheese and fudge from
an attorney and physical therapist, who
still work full-time and are discovering
what's next for them down on the farm.
No homegrown cucumbers are
required for the growing sport of
pickleball. We'll show you how this
Photo by Carol Wilson
game played on a badminton-sized
court with a net, paddles and a wiffle
ball is all the rage and has courts
sprouting up across the region.
It wasn't a court but a baseball diamond
where Fayetteville's Jack McGinley
pitched the 1955 Wake Forest Demon
Deacons to a Collegiate World Series
championship, a feat never repeated
since in the Atlantic Coast Conference.
In Game On, we catch up with one
special boy of summer.
The summer reading season is here,
so we have the pleasure of learning
about the latest from bestselling author
Mary Kay Andrews. She makes stops
in Southern Pines, June 8, and Raleigh,
June 17, to kick off a book tour for
her new novel, "Ladies' Night," and
shares an excerpt just to entice you into
wanting more.
Our yearlong tour of historical places
continues with a stop at the Town
Creek Indian Mound in Mount Gilead.
We'll tour the ceremonial site of the
Pee Dee and see what archaeologists
have uncovered over the years.
Time and years may not be so kind
to our bodies, making accessibility an
issue. As our Aging in Place series
continues, we meet one Carthage
couple who had the future in mind
when they built their dream home
using universal design.
Until next month...
—Carrie Frye
www.OutreachNC.com
utreach NC
Outrea
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Aging
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Navigating all your lifestyle choices
PO Box 2478
676 NW Broad Street
Southern Pines, NC 28388
910-692-9609 Office
910-695-0766 Fax
PO Box 2019
101-A Brady Court
Cary, NC 27512
919-909-2693 Office
919-535-8719 Fax
[email protected]
www.OutreachNC.com
facebook.com/outreachncmagazine
Follow us on Twitter
@OutreachNC
OutreachNC is a publication
of Aging Outreach Services, Inc.
Editor
Carrie Frye
Advertising Sales
Shawn Buring
910-690-1276
[email protected]
Michelle Palladino
910-639-9964
[email protected]
Marketing & Public Relations
Susan McKenzie
The entire contents of OutreachNC are
copyrighted by Aging Outreach Services.
Reproduction or use, without permission,
of editorial, photographic or graphic
content in any manner is prohibited.
OutreachNC is published monthly
on the first of each month.
OutreachNC • June 2013
Inside this issue
Ask the Expert.......................6
Town Creek
Indian Mound
page 18
Belle Weather
by Celia Rivenbark................8
Consumer Beware.................7
Farmers
Markets
page 54
Cooking Simple...................37
Eye Health:
Cataract Surgery.................33
Grey Matter Games.............48
AM 550's
Billy Bag-O-Donuts
page 50
Hospital Health...................27
Law Review..........................17
Pickleball
page 30
Game On
page 24
Life's Journey.......................53
Learning Changes
Everything...........................13
Goat Farm
page 34
Literary Circle........................9
Money Matters....................22
Over My Shoulder................58
Planning Ahead...................14
Pet Tales...............................15
Senior Moments..................16
5
Mary Kay
Andrews
page 10
Senior Shorts Guest Writer
Mary Kay Andrews excerpt
from "Ladies' Night"
..........................................12
Sentimental Journey..........47
Spirituality.............................29
Volunteer Opportunities.......28
Harry Connick Jr.
page 38
www.OutreachNC.com
Aging in Place
page 42
6
Ask the Expert
OutreachNC • June 2013
Q
: My mother is 90 years old and has mild
dementia. I am her live-in caregiver and
am faced with many decisions regarding
her care. My siblings do not always agree with the
decisions I make and are especially disagreeable
with decisions related to a living will. How do we
approach this topic and ensure my mother’s wishes,
not our own, are honored?
Our experts
will answer any
aging questions
you might have.
Fax your questions to
910-695-0766
or e-mail them to
[email protected].
donna brock, CMC
Geriatric Care Manager
A
: Assuming that your mother is still
capable of making her own decisions, a
conversation needs to take place between
the family and your mother to talk about what
she wants regarding her care. This is not an easy
conversation but should take place as soon as
possible. As an adult child, it is very difficult to see
your parent in a position where she may not be able
to care for herself. Some people have more difficulty
accepting these changes than others. It is very
important that she feels comfortable talking to all
her children about her medical care. It is up to her
adult children to create an environment where she
feels safe and free from pressure to make decisions
based on her desires instead of her children's.
910-692-0683 • 919-535-8713
[email protected]
As the primary caregiver, you have an opportunity
to have these conversations with your mother on a
day-to-day basis. Listen to your mother when she tells
you about her desires to limit care or even seek care
when her health declines. It is not advisable to wait
until a crisis arrives, as the adult children may not
agree on what they feel is the appropriate care for her.
Schedule an appointment with your mother’s
physician who can provide valuable insight in this
matter. The physician can offer realistic expectations
and confirm your mother’s ability to make these
decisions even with mild dementia.
Next, schedule an appointment with an elder law
attorney and have a living will completed. Allow
the attorney to ask your mother about her choices
in different scenarios. Before signing the document,
your mother can meet with you and your siblings and
inform all of you of her decisions. If your mother feels
pressure from her children, the attorney can be helpful
in offering her the opportunity to speak for herself and
provide an objective opinion to the adult children.
Elizabeth Zager, an associate attorney with Senter,
Stephenson, Johnson, PA in Fuquay-Varina, also
advises it is equally important that your mother
appoint a Health Care Power of Attorney. This person
will be given the authority to make health care
decisions for her when she is no longer able to do so.
This person will have the information from the living
will and the authority to make decisions accordingly.
Your mother should choose the person she feels is
the most trustworthy and able to enforce her wishes
even when others may try to intervene. This is not an
easy role to play when siblings are involved, but with
the proper planning and conversations, all matters
are discussed beforehand and arguments can be
avoided in the future.
www.OutreachNC.com
The new C-Note
T
he $100 bill is the most
frequently counterfeited
currency of all the bills
in circulation in the United States
(now you have an answer to a
"Jeopardy" question). The high
quality counterfeit $100 bills
found are being produced in
North Korea and have been given
the name Super-Notes by U.S.
officials. These Super-Notes are
made with the highest quality ink
and paper and designed to recreate
the various security features of
United States currency.
Most counterfeit bills can be
divided into three categories. The
first category is offset lithography,
and the second is high-tech digital
scanners and printers. Counterfeit
currency in both of these categories
is relatively easy to spot because
they lack the raised ink feel of
genuine bills.
Super-Notes are more deceptive
and are printed on cotton fiber
paper using the same expensive
intaglio printing presses used by
the government, which is what
makes this the third category of
counterfeit bills. An intaglio press
creates tiny ridges on a piece of
paper by forcing it into the inkfilled groves of an engraved plate
at very high pressure. That is what
gives real U.S. paper currency and
Super-Notes their unique feel.
The $100 bill is the largest
denomination paper U.S. currency
that has been
printed since
July 13, 1969.
Prior to this
date, $500, Consumer Beware
$1,000,
$5,000 and
$10,000 bills were being printed.
The new $100 bill was slated
to be rolled out in 2011 but
the U.S. Treasury experienced
problems with the printing press
in producing the new security
features embedded in this bill. It is
now on track to be rolled out for
circulation on Oct. 8, 2013. The
new security features on this bill
include a blue ribbon woven into
the fabric, an image of a bell and
a large “100” on the face of the
bill that will change in color from
copper to green when tilted. Ben
Franklin will still be prominently
displayed on the front of the bill,
but his image will have an
additional security strip
near his head that can
be seen when holding the
bill up to the light.
The old style $100 bills
will still be valid and can
be used. For those of you
who are bill collectors,
you may want to put a few of
the current style bills away since
the older bills will be destroyed
as they pass through the Federal
Reserve System. The average life
of a $100 bill in circulation is 90
months, or 7.5 years. Knowing
about these new security features
can help you identify a real $100
bill from a Super-Note.
For additional information, contact
the Community Services Unit of the
Southern Pines Police Department at
910-692-2732.
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
7
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OutreachNC • June 2013
H
Every 17 years, hideous hordes descend
ere in my home state of North Carolina,
we're accustomed to the sweaty dread that
comes with the annual announcement that
it's almost hurricane season. This is the kind of state
where no one seems to find it odd to host a hurricane
expo with light refreshments as though anyone would
be in the mood for lemon thins after a rousing talk
about the distinct possibility of deadly weather.
But, then, it is the South and we tend to mark every
occasion with food no matter how
terrifying. I have personally
witnessed mourners idly
gnawing on chicken
drummettes
while
looking at a body
laid out in a casket
in the living room.
Comfort food indeed.
That said, the latest
fearful prediction for our
state has completely destroyed my
appetite. In numerous news accounts, each more
alarming than the one before it, we are told that 2013
is the summer of the SEVENTEEN YEAR CICADA.
Entomologists say characteristics include big, black
and orange bodies, bulging red eyes and a distinct
"whee-oh, whee-oh" mating call coupled with linedancing moves. But enough about my ex. Let's talk
about the SEVENTEEN YEAR CICADA. I have to type
it like that because it is so terrifying to think that these
noisy fornicators are going to swarm for a "monthlong mating spree" that extends from my state as far
north as New York this summer.
When they arrive, they will be so loud that it will
sound "like a spaceship landing in your back yard,"
predicted one entomologist, who added that you'll
know they're here just by driving
with your windows down.
Note to self: Glue car
windows shut.
The cicadas are so noisy
that a Washington, D.C., bug
expert noted that they
Belle Weather
completely drown out
beltway traffic once they
INVADE.
So how many are we expecting to host here on the
East Coast this summer?
Billions, with a B. They will emerge from underground
to "date, mate and die" all in less than four weeks.
Meanwhile, the dowdy regular cicadas that are here
all the time can only hiss among themselves about all
the action the new kids are getting.
"Sure, they're flashy and all but, at the end of the
day, we're not going anywhere except sticking to the
side of this tree and blending in just like we always
have and always will," said longtime resident of my
back yard Eunice Cicada. In my imagination.
And like hurricanes, there's nothing we humans
can do to stop this invasion. They will crawl out from
underground where they have been hiding for almost
two decades, much like those people who still pine
for a Wham! reunion.
My only encounter with cicadas is when I mow
the yard and run into a creepy carcass. They are
huge insects, so huge that people in some parts of
the world actually eat them, preferring the females
because they're "meatier."
Or as Eunice would prefer, "big boned."
Rivenbark is the New York Times best-selling author of the
upcoming etiquette manual, "Rude Bitches Make Me Tired." Visit
www.celiarivenbark.com. Distributed by MCT Information Services.
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
Book Reviews:
The Secret Keeper &
The Shoemaker's Wife
K
ate Morton's “The
Secret Keeper" is
my kind of book.
Although long, it united
the worlds of 1930, ‘60
and ‘80 with a story that
involved a wonderful family
of four daughters, one son
and parents set on a farm in Literary Circle
England. The oldest daughter,
Laurel Nicholson, has a
successful acting career. She also carries the family
secret around in her heart for many years, sharing it
with only her younger brother, and finally solving it
as her mother lies dying at age 90.
In an attempt to identify people from her mother
Dorothy’s past, she learns Dorothy was closely
bound by two friends, Jimmy and Vivien, during
World War II in London. It is a book about love and
loyalty, one of Morton’s finest novels. The plot must
not be given away, so read it.
“The Shoemaker’s Wife” by Adriana Trigiani is an
epic novel that spans almost 500 pages and tells the
story of two boys, Ciro and Eduardo, orphans whose
mother left them with nuns in the Italian Alps. She
was not physically or financially able to care for
them. Her husband, who went to America to work
in the mines, was never heard from again; thus, the
boys spent their youth with the nuns until they were
banished by the priest. You must read this novel.
Several years ago, I came upon Trigiani in the
Southern Pines Library
by
chance
and read her
trilogy on Big
Stone Gap, Va.
I have been
a fan since
reading “Very
Valentine,”
“Lucia, Lucia”
and “Rococo.”
www.OutreachNC.com
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10
OutreachNC • June 2013
Next chapter for
author holds
new books and
beach house
By Melanie Coughlin
Special to OutreachNC
PHOTOGRAPHY BY
A
SARA SPEERT
uthor Mary Kay Andrews has
written a juicy new book that just
begs to be read beachside. Set
on Florida’s Anna Maria Island,
“Ladies’ Night” revolves around lifestyle blogger
Grace Stanton and starts off at full pace. The book
has Grace finding her husband cheating with her
assistant in chapter one.
“Her marriage goes up pretty flamboyantly, and
her husband locks her out of her former lifestyle,”
Andrews says of Grace.
Enraged, Grace drives her husband’s $175,000
Audi into their pool, an act that lands her in courtmandated therapy. There, Grace meets three other
women who have been betrayed, and they form a
bond based on a quest for revenge.
“‘Ladies’ Night’ starts with revenge, but you
figure out that revenge doesn’t heal the hurt,”
says Andrews.
The idea for her book was hatched during a
writer's retreat at
Mary Kay Andrews begins
Southern Pines’
her book tour for "Ladies'
Weymouth Center
Night" in perfect timing
for the Arts and
to kick off the summer
Humanities.
reading season. Andrews
“I had several
has signings at Country
ideas I’d been
Bookshop in Southern Pines
tinkering
with,
on Saturday, June 8, at 10
but none captured
a.m., and at Quail Ridge
my imagination.
I read an article
Books and Music in Raleigh
about the book,
on Monday, June 17, at 7:30
‘101 Uses for
p.m. See "Ladies' Night"
My
Ex-Wife’s
excerpt on page 12.
Wedding Dress,’
and that just sort
of tickled something in my imagination,” Andrews
says. “What if I wrote about a group of people
whose only bond is that they’ve all been betrayed?”
www.OutreachNC.com
continued page 11
OutreachNC • June 2013
I read an article about the book,
"101 Uses for My Ex-Wife’s Wedding Dress,"
and that just sort of tickled
something in my imagination.
This is the second
time Southern Pines
has played into the
New York Times
bestselling author’s
work. The book she
released last year,
“Spring
Fever,”
was based in the
fictional town of
Passcoe, N.C. which was inspired by Southern Pines.
In “Ladies’ Night,” Grace continues to blog, primarily about a
run-down beach cottage that she is renovating. Ironically, Andrews
was renovating a Tybee Island, Ga., beach cottage at the same time
she was writing about Grace’s project.
Andrews and her husband had been looking for a second beach
house because quarters had grown tight at their existing Tybee
Island property, thanks to the addition of two grandchildren.
Andrews found a house she liked last October, and she snatched
it up even though she knew it would require a lot of work while
she was still writing “Ladies’ Night.”
“We only had about two months to do everything,
including decorate it. I would wake up in the middle of the
night freaking out because I had to finish the book and the
house,” Andrews says. “It was crazy, but it was worth it.”
Andrews kept her fans up to date on the property she
named Ebbtide through her website and Facebook page,
posting furniture finds and decorating themes.
“I’m kind of a frustrated lifestyle blogger myself,” says
Andrews.
In addition to “Ladies’ Night,” Andrews has several
other books hitting the shelves this fall. Beginning in
October, her publisher is re-releasing four books in the
Callahan Garrity series, all of which Andrews wrote
under the name Kathy Hogan Trocheck. Also out in
October will be a new book, “Christmas Bliss,” that
brings back Weezie Foley and BeBe Loudermilk, two
of her readers’ favorite characters.
Andrews heads out June 4 for a book tour that
includes two stops in North Carolina. The first is
June 8 at the Country Bookshop in Southern Pines.
The second is June 17 at Quail Ridge Books and
Music in Raleigh. For more information, visit www.
marykayandrews.com and click the "events and
appearances" tab. ■
—Mary Kay Andrews
www.OutreachNC.com
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OutreachNC • June 2013
12
Senior Shorts Fiction
Excerpt from
"Ladies' Night"
I
f Grace Stanton had known the world as she
knew it was going to end that uneventful evening
in May, she might have been better prepared.
She certainly would have packed more underwear
and a decent bra, not to mention moisturizer and
her iPhone charger.
But as far as Grace knew, she
was just doing her job, writing and photographing
Gracenotes, a blog designed to make her own
lifestyle look so glamorous, enticing, and delicious it
made perfectly normal women (and gay men) want
to rip up the script for their own lives and rebuild one
exactly like hers.
She peered through the lens finder of her Nikon
D7000 and frowned, but only for a moment,
because, as Ben had told her countless times, a
frown was forever. She made a conscious effort to
smooth the burgeoning wrinkles in her forehead,
then concentrated anew on her composition.
She’d
polished the old pine table to a dull sheen, and the
available light streaming in from the dining room
window glinted off the worn boards. With her right
hand, she made a minute adjustment to one of the
two deliberately mismatched white ironstone platters
she’d placed on a rumpled—but not wrinkled—
antique French grain-sack table runner.
She replaced the oversized sterling forks, tines
pointed down, at the edge of the platters. Should she
add knives? Maybe spoons? She thought not. Spare.
The look she was going for was spare.
Edit, edit, edit,
she thought, nodding almost imperceptibly. Less was
more. Or that’s what Ben always claimed.
Now. About that centerpiece. She’d cut three small
palmetto fronds from the newly landscaped driveway
… No, she corrected herself. The builder’s website
referred to it as a motor court. The palmettos were
giving her fits. She’d arranged them in a mottled,
barnacle-crusted pale aqua bottle she’d plucked from
a pile of random junk at the flea market the weekend
before. They should have looked great. But no. They
were too stiff. Too awkward. Too vertical.
Grace replaced the palmettos with a cardboard
carton of lush red heirloom tomatoes. Hmm. The
vibrant color was a good contrast against the nubby
Mary Kay Andrews
After a brief hiatus in Raleigh, New
York Times bestselling author, Andrews
and her husband moved back to their
old neighborhood in Atlanta. She now
divides her time between Atlanta and
her restored beach cottages on Tybee
Island, Ga. For more information, visit
www.marykayandrews.com.
linen of the runner, and she loved the lumpy forms
and brilliant green and yellow stripes on some of
the irregularly shaped fruits. Maybe, if she placed
the container on its side, with the tomatoes spilling
out? Yes. Much better. She grabbed a knife from the
sideboard and sawed one of the tomatoes in half,
squeezing it slightly, until seeds and juices dribbled
out onto the tabletop.
Perfect.
She inhaled and clicked the trigger on her motordriven shutter. Click. Click. Click. She adjusted
the focus so the pale gel-covered seeds were in
the foreground. Now, she zoomed out, leaving the
tomatoes as red blurs, so that the old ironstone
platters were in focus, their age-crazed crackles and
brown spots coming into sharp relief.
“Very pretty,” a voice breathed in her ear.
Grace jumped.
Ben rested a hand lightly on her
shoulder and studied the vignette.
“Is that for tomorrow’s ‘Friday Favorites’ post?” he
asked.
“Mm-hmm,” Grace said. “I tried the palmetto
fronds and, before that, a basket of seashells, and
then some green mangoes, but I think the tomatoes
work best, don’t you?”
He shrugged. “I guess.”
“What?” Grace studied his face, as always, craving
his approval. “The tomatoes don’t work for you?”
“They’re nice. In an artsy-fartsy kind of way,” he said.
She pushed a strand of light brown hair off her
forehead and took a step back from the table. She’d
spent an hour putting the table together, and she’d
been fairly pleased with the effect she’d achieved.
But Ben didn’t like it.
“Too country-cutesy?” she
asked, glancing at her husband. Ben’s trained eyes
missed nothing. He’d been in the ad business forever,
and no detail was too small or too insignificant. It
was why they made such a great team.
“It’s your blog,” he reminded her. ■
© "Ladies' Night" by Mary Kay Andrews, St. Martin's Press.
www.OutreachNC.com
Technology courses empower
students of all ages
D
ave Bartlett, a technology instructor at
Sandhills Community College and founder
of "Dave's Geeks," earned this term of
endearment by a network of students of all ages who
have followed him through a sequence of courses.
Bartlett utilizes applicable situations to pique the
interest of students.
"For example, in a file management class, I ask
students to begin by taking an inventory of household
items for insurance purposes. We then structure their
information into a filing system, making it not only
a learning process but an applicable and worthwhile
exercise," says Bartlett. "Students are encouraged to
assist each other, making the process fun for adults
and creating a network of friends."
Technology Training in Continuing Education
attracts all types of students. Laura Todd, coordinator
of Technology Training for over 14 years, researches,
coordinates and hires for the program. She also spends
a good deal of each day teaching Apple courses.
OutreachNC • June 2013
13
Learning Changes Everything
"My passion is teaching," says Todd.
"Confident in the use of technology,
I am able to extend that confidence to my students
who are many times a little timid about using
technology."
Some students may not necessarily need college
credit but want to make sure they stay abreast of our
changing world, Recent reports investigate a fear of
social exclusion where such advances in technology
and the ability to stay in touch for those who may
be homebound or restricted in some way may
heighten the possibility of loneliness and less human
interaction.
With these studies in mind, the college is
organizing an advisory committee consisting of
community representatives to enhance offerings
and perhaps gain perspective on new class areas. If
you think you would be a good candidate to serve,
contact Todd at 910-695-3925.
For more information, call 910-695-3980 or visit
www.sandhills.edu/coned. Fee waivers may apply
for registration fees.
www.OutreachNC.com
14
OutreachNC • June 2013
The Financial Burden of Alzheimer’s
A
pproximately every minute, someone in the
United States develops Alzheimer’s disease,
the brain disease that causes problems with
memory, thinking and behavior. Alzheimer’s has recently
become the sixth leading cause of death in America,
and statistics show it will become even more common.
Symptoms usually develop slowly and worsen over
time, becoming severe enough to interfere with daily
tasks and most other intellectual and functional abilities.
In 2013, the direct costs of caring for those with
Alzheimer's in the U.S. will total an estimated $203
billion, and this cost is projected to increase to $1.2
trillion annually over the next 30-40 years.
It's important to explore the options that are available
to cover these costs, including retirement benefits,
personal savings, disability insurance from an employer
or personal policy, group health plan or retiree medical
coverage, cash-value life insurance, long-term care
insurance, Medicare, Medicare Supplement/Medigap
and Medicaid. Keep in mind that after symptoms of
Alzheimer’s appear, it is no longer possible to purchase
many types of insurance; and in regard to qualifying
for Medicaid, a spend-down of personal assets may be
required to qualify.
Alzheimer’s disease is not just
a normal part of aging. In its
early stages, memory loss is mild
and can be quite manageable.
What makes Alzheimer’s and
other types of dementias cost
Planning Ahead
more is that a person can live
as long as 20 years with the
disease, depending on their
age at onset and other health conditions. Providing the
level of appropriate care for a person over a two-decade
time span can certainly make managing finances and
health care a challenge.
This progressive disease becomes more pronounced
over time so the type and level of care a person needs
will increase. There may come a time when patients
with Alzheimer's can no longer make decisions for
themselves. This can create a hardship for a caregiver
trying to conduct financial transactions and make
medical decisions. There are several types of legal
documents that can be written before they are needed
to try to prevent legal pitfalls from making a difficult
time for families even worse.
Any advance planning that can be done to help the
patient with Alzheimer’s and his or her loved ones make
proactive, informed decisions, not just about health care,
but in regard to legal and financial matters, will ease the
emotional burden as well. Estate-planning attorneys
are specifically trained and licensed in the areas of
eldercare, Medicaid planning and veterans' benefits.
Once symptoms appear, dementia makes the planning
process more complex. It causes a specific set of
challenges that also must be considered when deciding
what the next steps will be. Among these are safety
issues specific to those with Alzheimer’s, working with
caregivers and case managers who understand how to
respond effectively to the patient, medical providers
and medications that may add to the cost of care as well
as activities and socialization that provide a positive
stimulus to the patient.
I encourage people to be proactive with their planning
and not wait until they have a crisis on their hands to
seek qualified assistance. For support, resources and
information, you can also contact Alzheimer’s North
Carolina at 800-228-8738 or www.alznc.org.
Donner, CRPC®, is a Chartered Retirement Planning Counselor,
has a bachelor of science in nursing, is licensed in LTC and is NAIC
Partnership Certified. She can be reached at 919-460-6076 or
[email protected].
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
The Power of No
N
o, don’t jump. No, don’t bark. No, don’t
pull on the leash. NO, NO, NO, NO.
Does this sound all too familiar when you
are training your dog?
“No” can be a powerful word in dog training, but only
if it is reserved for the moments that require immediate
and strong corrections. When a person is irritated or
angry with their dog's behavior, "no" is the very common
"go to” word. However, “no” is
not a command and should be
reserved for the worst behaviors
or for safety issues. When the
word “no” is used constantly,
the dog will habituate to the
word “no."
Think about when someone
nags you. Sometimes, selective
hearing takes over, and you
don’t even hear what they are
saying anymore. It is the same
with dogs; however, there is an
opportunity to train in order to
correct the dog's behavior.
15
When working with dogs,
remember that dogs do not
speak English; therefore, it is
critical to use very few words
and be extremely clear in
our communication. The
Pet Tales
inflection in our voice says
more than the word. This
is the same for dogs. “No,
don’t chew on the wall" but
instead, “Yes, here is your bone for you to chew on."
"No" does not teach your dog a new behavior. In
that moment when you have the temptation to say,
“no,” try to turn it around to a training opportunity.
Replace it with "sit," "off" or "quiet," to teach your dog
the alternative behavior you are looking for instead.
This will help you to redirect your dog, teach the
correct behavior and then praise and reward.
Now you will be teaching your dog to have better
manners, impulse control and to become a more
well-balanced companion.
Ganin-Toporek, owner of Sandhills Dog Training, can be
reached at 910-673-0074 or [email protected].
www.OutreachNC.com
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OutreachNC • June 2013
B
OutreachNC • June 2013
Guns or butter? Butter!
ack to the land of men doing strange things
with guns. Two new news stories emerge. The
first is the tale of Dale and the mouse in his
house. Can’t you just tell this isn’t going to go well?
Dale is Canadian, and I’m not sure why that is
important except perhaps it means since Canada has
far fewer guns than we do that he wasn’t as well-versed
in their use as Americans are. Ordinarily, going after
a mouse with a rifle would be like trying to kill an
elephant with a SAM (surface-to-air) missile, but Dale
had a powerful fear of mice, especially those in his
house. And so totally without thinking or bothering
to purchase a mouse trap, he grabbed his weapon.
Continuing the whole not-thinking thing, he turned the
barrel toward himself and slammed the stock down,
hoping to crush the mouse in the process.
Mice are really fast and, therefore, the mouse left the
scene of stupidity hysterically laughing and unscathed.
Not so for Dale, who managed to shoot himself in
the head. Why am I not surprised? The good news is
the bullet merely grazed him; the bad news is he was
charged with “careless use of a firearm;" and the really
bad news is his full name made it into the newspapers.
Our second tale involves Alfredo and the heartbreak
of lost love. Not Canadian, Alfredo hails from
Pennsylvania and is a guard at the local prison and
should have known better on account of his being a
guard at the local prison. But the alcoholic beverages
he’d consumed clouded his judgment, and the spirited
argument with his wife over a fleeting affair didn’t
help either. When push came to shove, Alfredo turned
all drama-king. To hurt his wife’s feelings and vowing
to rid himself of his wedding ring, he shot it with his
service revolver, expecting it would skid, like greased
lightning, off his finger. The bad news is he blew his
finger to bits instead, leaving
the ring intact; the good news
is his finger can be rebuilt; and
the really good news is while
Alfredo’s full name was in the
newspapers, his wife’s name was Senior Moments
not.
I’m seeing a pattern here: men
using guns as a multi-purpose tool. Men use knives
as toothpicks, wrenches as hammers, screwdrivers as
pry-bars, so perhaps the next generation of guns should
include attachments. Vacuum cleaners come with
attachments: upholstery brush, super-sucker wand;
Why not guns?
Instead of an improvised exploding-ring-remover,
how about a tiny acetylene torch nestled along the
revolver’s barrel ready to melt wedding rings and
other metals at a moment's notice? Or rifles with dust
wands to get at those hard-to-reach places like ceiling
fan blades. Maybe a hairdryer and revolver in one,
eliminating the need to carry both when traveling.
And for the seniors among us, a combination walking
cane-shotgun. I can see the ads for this: “Keep your
heat handy! The three-legged ring around the barrel’s
bottom provides walking stability while the stock’s
comfort grip leaves your trigger finger always at the
ready. Don’t buy a walking cane-rifle! When using lead
shot, the walking-shotgun eliminates the need for timeconsuming aiming, and the semi-automatic model
means no more manual chambering of a round.”
Trust me, this is going to be the next gun fashion
trend. Until then, a few words for Alfredo and Dale:
butter and mouse traps.
Cohea can be reached at [email protected].
www.OutreachNC.com
Health Care Powers of Attorney & Living Wills
Fourth article in Estate Planning Series
T
his series has discussed important components
of a basic estate plan. So far, I have covered
the Last Will and Testament, which distributes
your property after your death, and a Durable Power
Law Review
of Attorney, which names another individual to help
with financial matters. The final crucial pieces of a
basic estate plan are three documents, which deal
with health care decisions. These documents are a Health Care Power of
Attorney (HCPOA), a Living Will and a Health Insurance Portability and
Accountability Act (HIPAA) Release.
A HCPOA is a legal document in which the principal (you) gives an
agent (another person) broad medical powers and permits the agent to
make a wide range of medical decisions on behalf of the principal in the
event the principal is unable to make his or her own medical decisions.
When the principal is going in and out of consciousness, the doctor will
allow the principal to make decisions when he or she has the ability and
then will rely on the agent when the principal is not able to make his or
her own decisions.
It is important for you to talk with your agent about your wishes regarding
your health care treatment. When completing a HCPOA, I advise clients
to name one individual to serve as the primary agent and then a back-up
in the event the first individual cannot serve or is unavailable. I strongly
recommend against naming two agents to make health care decisions as
it can make the decision process much more difficult.
A Living Will is a written statement detailing a person's desires
regarding his or her medical treatment in certain circumstances. The
North Carolina Living Will covers the following three scenarios:
When a patient has an incurable or irreversible condition that will
result in death within a relatively short period of time;
1
2
3
When a patient is unconscious and, to a high degree of medical
certainty, will never regain consciousness; and
When a patient has advanced dementia or any other condition
resulting in the substantial loss of cognitive ability and that loss, to
a high degree of medical certainty, is not reversible.
In each of the above scenarios, you can indicate if you want the
doctors to withhold or withdraw life-prolonging measures, including
whether you want artificial hydration or artificial nutrition.
A final document that rounds out the health care portion of basic estate
planning documents is a HIPAA Release. HIPAA protects patient privacy
by limiting who can view a patient’s medical records. A HIPAA Release
can specifically authorize doctors and other medical professionals to share
your medical records and history with your named health care agent.
If you have questions regarding any of the documents discussed above,
or the other pieces of a basic estate plan, contact an elder law or estate
planning attorney near you.
Zager is an associate attorney with Senter, Stephenson, Johnson, P.A.,
practicing primarily in the areas of elder law and estate planning. She can be
reached at 919-552-4707 or [email protected].
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
17
18
OutreachNC • June 2013
Digging into North Carolina's
Native American heritage
By Maryelle Hunter
Special to OutreachNC
photography by
kathleen massie wells
H
Town Creek Indian Mound is one of the most visited state historical sites as well
as an archaeological site of the Pee Dee Native American culture and heritage.
Located at 509 Town Creek Mound Road in Mt. Gilead, the site welcomes visitors
Tuesday through Saturday from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Admission is free. For more
information, call 910-439-6802 or visit www.towncreekindianmound.com.
www.OutreachNC.com
ave you ever
wondered what
life was like
in central North Carolina
before the arrival of English
settlers several centuries
ago? The Town Creek
Indian Mound in nearby
Montgomery County brings
alive a rich cultural heritage
from the buried prehistoric
past.
Archeologists have called
the people who lived in
the area from the 11th to
the 14th centuries the Pee
Dee. Theirs was a complex
society, a regional variation
of the South Appalachian
Mississippian
culture.
They built earthen mounds
for their spiritual and
political leaders, engaged
in
widespread
trade,
supported craft specialists
and celebrated a new kind
of religion.
A trip to the Town
Creek Indian Mound site
is a worthwhile adventure
because it is the most
popular state historic site
dedicated to the American
Indian heritage, and it is
also a National Historic
Landmark. The Town Creek
site, whose main features
are a platform mound with
a surrounding village and
palisade, is situated on
a low bluff where Town
Creek joins Little River,
near Mt. Gilead.
continued page 20
OutreachNC • June 2013
www.OutreachNC.com
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20
OutreachNC • June 2013
continued from page 18
In addition to being a major center of Pee Dee
habitation, the Town Creek site served as a place for
discussion of matters important to the collective clans
of the tribe. It was the setting for significant religious
ceremonies and feasts, which often lasted several
days. Many of the highest-ranking members of the
tribe lived, died and were buried there.
Rich Thompson, at left,
the historic site manager at
Town Creek, points out that
the Pee Dee left no written
record so that archeology was
imperative in uncovering the
history of the tribe. Excavation
began at Town Creek around
1927 on an amateur basis
as local residents who had
knowledge of the site collected arrowheads and other
relics. Then in 1937, L. D. Frutchey allowed exploratory
work to begin by professional archeologists as part of
the efforts of the Works Progress Administration, and
he subsequently donated the mound and an acre of
ground to the state of North Carolina.
University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill (UNC-CH)
archaeologist Dr. Joffre Coe and his associates directed
most of the research at Town Creek. Though UNCCH has curatorial responsibility for archaeological
collections excavated at the site, the state’s Department
of Cultural Resources retains permanent stewardship
of these collections and provided the impressive
interpretive exhibits contained in the Town Creek
Visitors Center. By use of a photo mosaic of the
entire area, created and digitized in 2000 by Coe,
study continues on the overall site by graduate and
undergraduate students at UNC-CH in anthropology
and archeology.
Between 18,000 and 25,000 people visit the site
each year, of which about 30 percent are school
groups, according to Thompson.
“One of the most interesting things that people
comment about is the technology that the Pee Dee
tribe incorporated into their lifestyle of more than 600
years ago and the use of elements much less primitive
than were originally imagined. It is challenging to
explain the facts to schoolchildren who visit, because
life 600 years ago is a foreign concept to them with
their computers and video games. We try to give them
an understanding of what they would do if they were
in that situation," says Thompson.
Leading from the visitors center to the actual mound
area is terrain that has been restored with grasses and
plants that were native to the site in the time the Pee
Dee people occupied the land. As a result, wild turkey,
quail, deer, possums and even foxes on occasion have
been attracted to this level plain.
The reconstruction of the mound and the other
buildings within the palisade or stockade that marked
the limits of the settlement began in 1956. The guard
towers on the north and south sides of the stockade
were originally constructed to keep enemies outside
the palisade and were a primary defensive measure.
For instance, the passages through the stockade to the
site allow only room for one person at a time to gain
entrance.
Little River functioned as an interstate highway
for the Indians who lived in the area, according to
Thompson, since it ultimately joins the Pee Dee River
on its way to the coastline. He notes that the stockaded
site overlooking the river has a steep bank down to the
water’s edge, serving as an additional defense.
www.OutreachNC.com
continued page 21
OutreachNC • June 2013
A round building is a
reconstruction of a burial house
built on the location. The outer
walls were made of upright posts
covered with wattle and daub.
The roof was made of poles lashed
together and covered with straw
thatching on the outside and river
cane on the inside. A small central
hearth provided light and warmth
for visitors to the burial house.
Excavations
revealed
that
the actual mound itself at Town
Creek was constructed over an
early rectangular structure known
as an earth lodge. The walls of
the structure were formed by
individual posts set in holes. Dirt
was then piled in an embankment
around the walls and over the roof
to create the lodge. Eventually, this
structure collapsed. Its remains
and the surrounding area were
covered, creating a low earthen
mound that served as a platform
upon which a temple was erected.
This structure was later destroyed
by fire. A second structure was
built atop the new mound. An
east-facing ramp provides access
from a central plaza to the top of
the mound
The hearth in the center of the
structure sheltered a constantly
burning fire. It was thought to
be the earthly representative of
the sun, and as long as it burned
brightly without interruption, no
harm could come to the tribe. The
fire symbolized unity among the
Pee Dee tribe, making them the
“people of one fire.”
Thompson
observes
that
although the Pee Dee didn’t have
a calendar, they could keep track
of the seasons by consulting the
position of the sun shining through
the opening in the roof where the
column of smoke escaped.
“In the equinox—spring and
fall—the sun shone directly on the
altar; on the first day of winter, it
shone on an adjacent post, and
in summer, the sun shone on a
particular spot near the altar. In
that way, they knew when to plant
and reap their crops, and to be
ready for the change of season,"
he says.
Another lodge at the site is built in
a square shape, which was unusual
because most of the housing was
considered easier to build in circular
form. It is directly across the plaza
from the central meeting place or
mound, so it is thought that an
influential member of the tribe may
have occupied it.
In a particular effort to give
the traditional culture of the Pee
Dee Indians new meaning to
today’s society, special events are
scheduled throughout the summer
on the second Saturdays of June
and July at the site. On June 8,
a program called “Fiber, the Tie
that Binds” will demonstrate
prehistoric and contemporary
methods of fiber manipulations.
Visitors can learn how the Pee
Dee culture used fiber to hold
their world together, and see how
modern artists use fiber to create
attractive pieces of work. Handson activities are available for the
young and young-at-heart.
Coming up on July 13 is the
celebration of the birthday of the
late Dr. Coe, “Godfather of North
Carolina Archeology.” The program
includes facts about the science he
taught and practiced and features
games and activities for kids, living
history demonstrations and arts
and crafts vendors.
Both the June and July events
are free and open to the public as
is admission to the site, although
donations are accepted. ■
For a more in-depth pictorial tour,
visit www.OutreachNC.com
and click on the Town Creek
Indian Mound Photo Gallery.
www.OutreachNC.com
21
22
OutreachNC • June 2013
Building a bubble
O
ne common factor of any financial bubble
is the increased purchase of an overvalued
asset. As long as the purchasing continues,
the price of that asset will stay stable even if it’s
overvalued. Eventually, it will self-correct, at which
point the bubble pops and creates a downward
spiral where people see the price drop so they sell,
which then drops the price further. Eventually, the
supply and demand balance out, but the emotional
side of investors tends to worsen the problem before
it gets better.
Government Spending
The current version of quantitative easing, which
has been in effect for several months now, consists
of the federal reserve increasing monetary supply
by purchasing $40 billion of bonds each month.
The increased supply of money keeps the economy
running more smoothly because the price to borrow
money (interest rate) is low. In turn, this does help
the stock market continue its upward movement—
and eventually the stock market may experience a
downturn when the quantitative easing ends, but the
stocks aren’t the most susceptible to being the next
bubble. When spending stops, interest rates will
increase and since they're so low, they can increase
very significantly.
Where is the Bubble?
Bonds have been a historically stable asset class—
one often used by retirees to create income from
their savings while not taking on much risk. The most
common risk for bonds is interest rate risk: When
interest rates increase, the price of bonds decreases
because investors can now buy more attractive,
higher interest rate bonds, so the preexisting ones
are less attractive. In addition to the pending interest
rate increase, the government buying $40 billion of
bonds each month is making bonds more expensive,
and once the spending stops, they will drop back to
a realistic value.
The Pop
Either factor mentioned above can begin the
pop. It’s the downward spiral that creates the real
“bubble” popping effect. As investors see their assets
drop in price, many people sell
and therefore drive the price
lower. In addition, inflation may
be a hidden risk since it doesn’t
directly affect the price but it does
decrease your buying power.
Money Matters
Seeking Safety
There are several ways to weather this potential
bubble. First, bonds have a set price and payment
schedule: if held to maturity, the issuing company will
pay out that exact price as well as any interest earned
along the way. So although the price of that bond
may look like it’s gone down based on your monthly
investment statements, holding on to it can be more
valuable than selling. The most important thing now
is to buy quality bonds. Short-term bond prices will
fluctuate less, but don’t sacrifice quality because
holding to term may not have the same benefits if
the company can’t pay its debts. Luckily, bonds are
rated on a scale where AAA or Aaa are the highest
ratings. Once the bond gets to the C ratings, it may be
a good idea to seek alternate options. If you’re unsure
of your current bonds' ratings, any financial advisor
can look up the information and give you an idea of
their safety.
Also review your mutual funds that invest in bonds.
Although you may not be able to find the individual
holdings’ ratings, there will be an average quality
rating. Bond mutual funds also do not have their own
set term, value or interest rate, so you will not have
the option of holding to maturity, which is a good
reason to review those investments now.
While the government spending does help the
economy in the short run, its long-term effects may
backfire. Being aware of the potential decrease in
prices can save you from losing some of those hardearned dollars.
Clement is a financial planner with Clement Capital
Group. She offers securities and advisory services as an
investment adviser representative of Commonwealth
Financial Network®, a member firm of FINRA/SIPC a
Registered Investment Advisor. She can be reached at
910-693-0032 or [email protected].
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
www.OutreachNC.com
23
24
Game On
OutreachNC • June 2013
McGinley's arm keyed
Wake's national title
W
ake Forest is the only Atlantic Coast
Conference school to win a national
championship in baseball. The Deacons
have a place in history, in large part, because of a
skinny pitcher who went on to become a school
teacher and administrator in Fayetteville.
Wake Forest won the 1955 College World Series
behind a miraculous pitching performance by Jack
McGinley, a sophomore from New Jersey, who
blossomed into a star when it mattered most.
McGinley, who still lives in Fayetteville, had a
3-2 pitching record during regular season. But then
the right-hander put together a postseason of which
dreams are made. It was simply unbelievable.
He was the winning pitcher in three of the
Deacons’ five College World Series victories and
won two additional games in the regional playoffs,
giving him a 5-0 record in postseason. He finished
8-2 for the 1955 season with a team-leading 2.52
earned run average over 90 and a third innings.
“It was kind of amazing how it all worked out,”
says McGinley of his sensational stretch run. “I don’t
know exactly how I got to start all of those big games
or how I was able to pitch as well as I did. I guess I
just got hot at the right time.”
An understatement to be sure, but then, those who
know the retired school principal would tell you he
is a master of minimizing his own accomplishments.
Here is what McGinley did in the Deacons’ dash
to the national title:
Getting the start in Wake Forest’s opening game
of the first round of the playoffs, he pitched a
complete game as the Deacons defeated West
Virginia, 5-1, in Morgantown, WV. Again starting
the opener in the second round, he shut out
Rollins, 4-0, in Orlando, Fla.
Most of the Wake players made their first airplane
trip as they traveled to Nebraska for the College
World Series in Omaha. McGinley once again got
the ball for the opening game, and he pitched a
masterpiece, blanking Colgate, 1-0, on four hits.
By Thad mumau
Special to OutreachNC
PHOTOGRAPHY BY
carol wilson
“That was quite a day,” McGinley
says. “We had been told to expect
terrible heat in Omaha, but it was
anything but. It was freezing cold,
it rained and it hailed. The game
was stopped for about an hour.”
Following the delay – and unlike
today’s baseball philosophy, which
usually dictates removing a pitcher
after a long stoppage of action –
McGinley returned to the mound
and picked up where he left off.
“It didn’t bother me,” he says.
“I got to rest and I got to warm up
again. So I was fine.”
www.OutreachNC.com
continued page 25
Game On
OutreachNC • June 2013
He was also fine in pitching Wake to a must-win
over Western Michigan, which had sent the Deacons
into the losers’ bracket. McGinley carried a 10-3
lead into the seventh inning before the bullpen hung
on for a 10-7 victory.
Another Wake Forest win set up a rubber-game
showdown with Western Michigan, that one to
decide the NCAA championship.
The Deacons were out of arms. Lefty Davis, the
team’s leader in wins with 10, was at Wake Forest
(where the campus was located, 15 miles from
Raleigh). He had been sent back for summer school
after he threw a shutout in the second game of the
CWS. By the time the finale rolled around, almost
everyone else on the Deacons’ pitching staff was
long on innings and short on rest.
Wake coach Taylor Sanford decided to go with
Bill Walsh, a senior, who had hurt his arm early in
the season and had not pitched since. He lasted two
and two-thirds innings, and Buck Fichter threw one
inning.
With two outs in the fourth, the bases loaded,
and Western Michigan leading, McGinley was
summoned from the bullpen. He had just one day of
rest between appearances.
“When Coach Sanford called me to warm up,”
McGinley recalls, “I was surprised. My arm was
really stiff, and I didn’t have a thing. My arm was
killing me. And I really didn’t have time to get loose.
I had thrown seven or eight pitches when the phone
rang, and the bullpen coach said, ‘You’re in there.’
www.OutreachNC.com
continued page 26
25
26
OutreachNC • June 2013
continued from page 25
“I bounced a couple of my
warm-up pitches, and Sanford
came out to ask our catcher,
Linwood Holt, how I was
looking. Linwood said, ‘I don’t
know, Coach, he hasn’t gotten
one to the plate yet.’
“I was not throwing hard; I just
got the ball over the plate, and our
fielders did the rest. In between
innings, our trainer was rubbing
that Atomic Balm on my arm.”
McGinley slammed the door.
He allowed no runs, only three
hits and walked no one in five
and a third innings of sparkling
relief. Meanwhile, the Deacons’
bats came alive and they rallied
to win, 7-6, and take the national
championship.
McGinley was the winning
pitcher for the third time in the
College World Series.
“It was fantastic,” he says,
describing the euphoria that
reigned after the final out. “I
threw my glove in the air, and we
did a dog pile on the field, with
me on the bottom.
“The feeling was like nothing I
have experienced since. We all
felt that way. Our third baseman,
Billy Barnes, went on to play on
an NFL championship team, and
he later said the feeling of doing
that didn’t compare with what he
felt being a part of Wake Forest’s
College World Series champion.
“Over the years, our team
has been recognized numerous
times,” McGinley says. “It is
always greatly appreciated by all
of us, and it is always special to
get together again.
“Wake Forest has honored our
team three times, and the school
even gave us rings in 2000, 45
years after we won the national
title. That was nice. In fact, it is
always nice to be remembered.”
www.OutreachNC.com
McGinley stays in touch with
several of his old teammates.
“I talk with John Stokoe every
month or two. He lives in New
Hampshire. Harold Moore is
in Asheville, and we play golf
together once or twice a year.
Buck Fichter was my roommate
for three years, and we talk
often. Coach Sanford has died,
and Lefty Davis was killed when
hit by an automobile.
“But a lot of us are still around,
and we are good friends,”
McGinley says. “Of course,
when we get together, we always
talk about Omaha. We replay the
games and tell the same stories
we have told before; they just get
a little bigger and a little better
each time we tell them.
“It’s good to remember the past,
but we haven’t dwelled on it.
“Baseball is a grand
game. There isn’t any
sport like it. I still love
it, and I was fortunate to
have the chance to play,
especially with such a
great bunch of guys.
“I am blessed and have been
blessed in many, many ways. I
had a wonderful wife and friend,
Helen, who died in 2005. We
were married 44 years. My son,
Jack, lives in Fayetteville. My
daughter, Maria, and my three
grandchildren are in Raleigh.
“I am in good health,” McGinley
says. “I get out and walk when
the weather is good, I’m a fair
golfer (6 handicap – there’s that
understatement again), and I
have a lot of friends I enjoy. Life
is really super. The Lord has been
very good to me.” ■
Hospital Health
T
OutreachNC • June 2013
27
Valve Clinic opens in Reid Heart Center
he human heart has four chambers, each
with a valve that directs the forward flow of
blood and prevents backward leakage. When
a valve doesn’t work properly – when there isn’t an
opening for blood to flow through or if it leaks—for
example, a person may experience symptoms ranging
from weakness or dizziness to palpitations to chest
discomfort. Treatment will depend on the type and
severity of the problem.
An interventional cardiologist and two heart surgeons
with the FirstHealth Valve Clinic have developed a team
approach to care that includes prompt evaluations
and expert treatment options for patients with valve
disorders.
When patients are referred to what is essentially a
one-stop Valve Clinic, specialized testing is centrally
located for patient convenience and all requests for
previous diagnostic tests and subspecialty appointments
are arranged for them.
The multidisciplinary professional team then
meets to evaluate test and examination results and
to recommend a treatment plan that is specific to
the patient. Treatment options may include medical
management, conventional surgery or the latest
minimally invasive options for disorders such as aortic
stenosis, aortic regurgitation, pulmonary stenosis,
mitral stenosis and mitral regurgitation.
“We want to encourage patients to explore the full
spectrum of therapeutic options,” says interventional
cardiologist Steven J. Filby.
The Valve Clinic team includes cardiothoracic
surgeons Peter I. Ellman and Art T. Edgerton, as well
as Filby.
As coordinator of the Valve Clinic, Dona Baker, R.N.,
BSN, coordinates patient appointments with physicians
as well as the procedures that are required for a patient
evaluation. She also serves as the central contact for
patients and families.
For more information on referrals to the FirstHealth
Valve Clinic, visit www.firsthealth.org/valve or call
800-213-3284.
www.OutreachNC.com
28
OutreachNC • June 2013
Volunteering:
find your niche
A
lmost every volunteer’s story of
how he or she began volunteering
is different. For many years, I was
one of the many people who worked fulltime (weekends for me were mandatory).
So I didn’t feel I had time to dedicate to
volunteering. It wasn’t as though I was a
bad person; I had strong beliefs in several
causes. I would donate money when I could
and go to fundraising events and so forth,
but for some reason, it never occurred to me
to actually do hands-on help.
Then, a sudden career change caused
me to re-think some things in my life. Now
I had lots of time on my hands. So I began
researching places to volunteer in the county.
One of the obvious places was the hospital,
and it was first on my list to contact.
About the same time, I asked my wife
what she wanted for her birthday. She
had just read an article in the newspaper
seeking volunteers to help at a local
animal rescue.
She said, “I want us to volunteer next
Volunteer RSVP
weekend washing and grooming dogs
that need adopting.”
I was hesitant, but I had asked her
what she wanted. So we did. Now, two years later, not only
am I volunteering on a regular basis for different animal
causes in our area, but I am also the volunteer director for a
program with more than 500 volunteers.
So if you’re thinking of volunteering or already
volunteering and want to try something new, here are a
few things to consider:
What are your interests or what is a cause you really
believe in, e.g. ending homelessness, teaching
children, assisting the elderly, planting gardens? Whatever
you can think of, I can almost guarantee there is a volunteer
opportunity locally.
If you know someone, a friend, relative or neighbor,
who already volunteers, ask them about what they do
and find out about their road to volunteerism. You may also
be able to go along with them as they volunteer to see what
it’s like firsthand.
Once you decide on a place to volunteer, start
out with a reasonable commitment. Be honest
with yourself about your time constraints. We are
always excited at first and want to do as much as
possible, but as you progress, you will see the
ebb and flow of the organization and can take
on new assignments as you go along.
If you're still not sure about where to
volunteer, call 910-215-0900, and I can
give you lots of volunteer opportunities.
Now as I look back, I could have
been volunteering all along. With most
organizations, their schedules are very
flexible and do not require a minimum hour
commitment.
1
2
3
4
Deese, Retired and Senior Volunteer Program
(RSVP) director with the Moore County Department
of Aging, can be reached at 910-215-0900 or
[email protected].
RSVP volunteers, Bryan Rainbow on ladder, Greg Sasser and
Heather Funk at a community park project in Robbins.
www.OutreachNC.com
For goodness' sake
D
uring this month especially
I seem to think a lot about
my grandmother, maybe
because this is her birthday month.
Even though she died when I was
just 10 years old, my memories
Spirituality
of her are strong. She is a guiding
force in my life even now, and I
remember many things about her.
One of the things she did was sew quilts. She made
them of material left over from the dresses she made
for herself. I have one of her quilts, and I can look at it
today and remember the dresses she wore. There were
everyday dresses and Sunday go to church dresses, and
those for one occasion were not worn for the others.
She also loved to plant things and to watch them grow.
She had many favorite flowers and a real green thumb
with them all. She had a stroke at one point, and while she
became limited with what she could do, she continued to
give life her all even as her all changed direction.
We had a cat named Whiskers that used to sit in her
lap and she would rub his head with an arm and hand
that had been left compromised. I watched as she did
exercises to regain movement and strength. She did not
quit on any part of life.
She was one of those people, who really knew how to
love. Whether plants, pets or people, she loved them all,
and everybody loved her. She had a wonderful way of
welcoming folks, and I never remember hearing her say
a bad word about anyone. Her love was unconditional,
and you felt wanted and deeply cared for in her presence.
Every member of her family at one time or another
would declare to be the most like her, claiming all her
goodness as our own. I know I want to be like her in
every way I can. I continue to be glad to consider what
her thoughts might have been about whatever life brings
my way today.
She was born in 1881 and died in 1965 with so many
changes over the course of her life. She lived through
horse-and-buggy days with no running water and cooking
on a wood stove to days of indoor plumbing, electric
stoves and television. In every way, she embraced life with
joy and a sense of wonder. To paraphrase a quote, she
didn’t tell me how to live; she lived, and let me watch.
I am thankful for her and those like her who so
graciously help shape this world and all we know in it,
those who carefully plant seeds of clarity, courage and
compassion. I hope and pray for us all that we might
claim such goodness as our own.
Hudson, senior development officer at The Foundation
of FirstHealth, can be reached at 910-695-7500 or email
[email protected].
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
29
30
OutreachNC • June 2013
Serving up a game of pickleball
O
n a breezy spring day, the thwack of the
wiffle ball could be heard on the pickleball
courts at Pinehurst No. 6. A crowd had
gathered to participate in the newest sport on the
Senior Games circuit - pickleball.
Pickle-what? This is no joke. If you haven't already
heard, the great sport of pickleball is sweeping the
nation. Across our region, people from 18 to 80 years old
are getting in on the relatively new sport of pickleball.
Watch them play for a few minutes, and it's easy to get
caught up in the sounds of sneakers squeaking on the
courts mingled with a whole lot of laughter.
Pickleball is a racquet sport that combines elements
of tennis, badminton and table tennis. The sport was
invented in 1965 outside of Seattle, Wash. as a game
that could appeal to people of all ages. The inventors,
Congressman Joel Pritchard, William Bell and Barney
McCallum, wanted something to keep the kids
engaged through the lazy days of summer.
By lowering their backyard
badminton net and handing the kids
ping-pong paddles and a wiffle
ball, they created a game that
caught on quickly with friends
and neighbors. The ground
strokes and volleys are similar to
tennis, but the court is smaller
and the ball is more affected by
the wind because it is lighter.
Although originally invented
as
a
backyard
pastime,
pickleball is now an organized
sport represented by national and
international governing bodies. The
number of sanctioned courts is steadily
rising, especially in places with large
retirement communities like Florida
and Arizona.
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
By michelle goetzl
Special to OutreachNC
PHOTOGRAPHY BY
carol wilson
31
Players of all ages are taking to pickleball courts across the region
including outdoor courts at Pinehurst No. 6 in Pinehurst and indoor
courts at the Five Points Center for Active Adults in Raleigh.
In our region, we are fortunate
to have courts in Apex, Cary,
Pinehurst and Raleigh. The
game was brought to the region
by people who had played
elsewhere, often Florida, and
wanted to enjoy the sport in their
hometowns.
The sport has grown quickly,
mainly by word of mouth. When
pickleball first came to Pinehurst a
little more than a year ago, about six
people showed up to the first roundrobin. A week later, their numbers had
ballooned to 30. According to Larry Cox
of Pinehurst, there are now between 50 and
70 regular players who come out every week,
and pickleball is currently “the only growing
sport in Pinehurst.”
The same is true in Cary. According to Sam
Trogdon, of the Bond Park Community Center,
“pickleball is one of the fastest-growing open
gyms” they have.
The two biggest factors in pickleball's
popularity seem to be that it is easy to learn and
great for people at various levels. Most mention
that pickleball is great because it is very similar
to tennis, but it is not as strenuous due to the
smaller court size and shorter games.
Don Woodfield, the pickleball coordinator
for the Pinehurst Tennis Club, explained that
a number of their regulars are “former tennis
players who can't play at the same speed that
they used to.” Pickleball allows them to stay
in the action and keep their minds and bodies
active.
Richard Meister of Fuquay-Varina makes the
drive to the Five Points Center for Active Adults
in Raleigh to play.
www.OutreachNC.com
continued page 32
32
OutreachNC • June 2013
continued from page 31
"I have had some medical problems and needed help with
endurance, and this is really helping with my endurance, and it is a
lot of fun. I can't play tennis anymore, but I play pickleball almost
every day. It only takes 10 to 20 minutes to play a game. It's social,
it's fun and it's good exercise," says Meister.
Pickleball isn't just for tennis aficionados. Many of the players
have a background in tennis, but it is also a great sport for those just
looking for something new.
“Playing five rounds of golf per week gets old fast. With pickleball,
give us 20 minutes and you'll be hooked,” says Cox.
Vicki Hancock is one of the regular players in Pinehurst. She was
smitten when she first saw people playing pickleball a year ago.
"It's wonderful aerobic exercise and a great social game because
it's short," says Hancock.
In the popular round-robin style of playing, people are able to play a
20-minute game, then socialize
for five to 10 minutes before
going back to play another
game. There is a great sense of
community among the regulars,
and it is easy to see how much
fun they are all having.
It is a great way for varied
generations to play. In Cary, Sam
Trogden finds that “once people
get in and play, they really enjoy
Apex Community Center, apex
it.” Trodgen has seen father/son
First and third Wednesdays: 10 a.m.-1 p.m.
teams play together and just had
Bond Park, Raleigh
their first “learn to play” clinic
Tuesdays: 12:30-3 p.m.
for teenagers.
Fridays: 9:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m.
The largest group with piqued
Brier Creek Community Center,
interest in the sport is those in
raleigh
their younger 50s and up, but as
Mondays: 6:30-8:30 p.m.
word spreads, so does the span
of ages interested. Cox likes to
Five Points Center for Active
Adults, Raleigh
play pickleball with his 10-yearWednesdays: 1-3 p.m.
old grandson, and according
to Woodfield, there were “half
Herbert C. Young Community
a dozen people in their 80s
Center, cary
signed up” at the recent Senior
Wednesdays: 9 a.m.-12:30 p.m.
Games in the Pines.
Moore County Senior
Courts around the region are
Enrichment Center, Pinehurst
filling up with players. All of
Call for court availability: 910-215-0900
the locations welcome new
Optimist Park & Community
players. Low-end paddles are
Center, Raleigh
also available to borrow at most
Tuesdays & Thursdays: 12:30–2:30 p.m.
locations. There are pickleball
Pinehurst No. 6, Pinehurst
games happening nearly every
Mondays & Wednesdays: 10-11:30 a.m.
day of the week, so go ahead
Fridays: 11 a.m.-3 p.m.
and join in the fun. ■
Play Pickleball
www.OutreachNC.com
Latest innovation in cataract
surgery reduces complications
C
linical data was presented by OptiMedica at
European Society of Cataract and Refractive
Surgeons in Milan, Italy, to confirm the
unparalleled performance of the Catalys Precision
Laser System for cataract surgery. The subject of
multiple presentations at the meeting, Catalys was
shown to deliver dramatic improvement in the
precision, effectiveness and ease of performing
cataract surgery.
Carolina
Eye
Associates, based in
Southern Pines with
seven other locations
in North Carolina, was
the first on the East
Coast and only the
second in the United
States to offer cataract
surgery using
the
Catalys Precision Laser.
“We chose Catalys
because it allows us
to provide leading
technology in efficacy,
safety and comfort
for our patients. The
Catalys laser enables us
to offer the most precise
visual
outcomes,”
says Anna Fakadej,
a cataract surgeon at
Carolina Eye.
This laser system
enables removal of
the top layer of the
cataract
without
manual involvement,
by providing custom
control of size, shape
and position; precise
lens
fragmentation,
including the softening
and segmentation of
the actual cataract
prior to removal by the
surgeon.
This new technology
OutreachNC • June 2013
33
allows for much less energy to be applied to the eye
during cataract removal, thus reducing the chance
of complications. It is a more precise procedure and
should enable cataract surgeons to more accurately
position the lens in the patient, which is key in visual
outcomes.
For information about Carolina Eye or Catalys laser cataract
surgery, call 910-295-2100 or visit www.carolinaeye.com.
www.OutreachNC.com
34
OutreachNC • June 2013
Down on the goat farm
S
ometimes there's a story
behind a name.
"One night about four
years ago, we must have had a little
too much wine,” is Sue Stovall’s
answer when asked why she started
a goat farm, named Paradox. “At
least that’s our story and we’re
sticking to it.”
The name part for the farm in West
End is easier to explain as both
Sue and her husband, Hunter, have
doctorate degrees‒Sue’s in physical
therapy, with her own practice in
Southern Pines, and Hunter’s in law,
with his own office also in Southern
Pines. Neither had ever lived on a
farm or done any work on a farm,
and they did not have a lifelong
dream to be farmers. So the name is
perfect on two levels: a pair of docs,
and becoming working farmers is
quite different and unexpected for
the couple. They are full partners
in the work, sometimes milking
together, taking care of the animals,
doing the hard work of hauling hay
for feed. Sue credits Hunter as “the
marketing person. He just loves to
go out and talk about the farm.”
www.OutreachNC.com
By ann robson
Special to OutreachNC
PHOTOGRAPHY BY
john gessner
Hunter and Sue Stovall
are not the average goat
farmers. Both still work
full-time in careers
unrelated to farming.
They may retire to
full-time farming in the
future, having perfected
making and selling
their cheese and fudge
made from the milk
of the goats raised on
their farm in West End.
OutreachNC • June 2013
OutreachNC • June 2013
The goats that call Paradox Farm
home are healthy and happy. At
bottom right, Sue Stovall gives
Rhett Morris, our Cooking Simple
columnist, a tour of the farm and
a lesson in milking. Look for the
Blueberry Goat Cheese Tarts recipe
on page 37.
The couple have three grown
children who “thought we were
crazy” when they told them their
plans for a goat farm, Sue notes.
However, they have come around
to appreciate and support their
parents. Their son is working with
the Peace Corps in Peru.
"They are busy with their own
lives," says Sue.
For assistance with the routine
daily chores, Sue hired teenagers
in the area who are good at the
work and appreciate having a job.
The Stovalls didn’t just dive into
this project either. They studied
and researched. Sue took a
special course offered by North
Carolina State University to learn
the finer points of tending to a
herd of milking goats. The lower
fat content of goat's milk and
cheese appealed to them. Some
suggest that goat's milk products
may be an alternative for those
who are lactose intolerant.
The Stovalls bought their first
two goats, Thelma and Louise,
and a llama to start. Then a third
goat was added. That was four
years ago. As of April, they had
68 goats of various breeds and
genders. As I drove up the lane to
their home, they had 70 goats but
by the time I got out of the car,
they had sold a pair to a family.
continued page 36
www.OutreachNC.com
35
36
OutreachNC • June 2013
continued from page 35
“It’s hard work,” Sue admits.
She also loves it. When she is milking the goats
at 6:15 in the morning, she gazes out over the
land, watches the sun come up and enjoys the
different landscapes that appear every day. In
the evening when she is milking, she sees that
same sun set. The pattern of life plays out before
her each day. The life patterns of the goats are
another part of the work that
she enjoys. She has named
most of the goats and calls
them by name. Some names
have meanings, and Sue has a
tale to tell about each of them.
Their sounds are very similar
to a baby’s cry, with different
pitches for what they need.
Between the morning and
evening milking, she works
full-time at Southern Pines
Physical Therapy.
For the past several months
she has been taking care of
her granddaughter, toting
her around in a backpack
for babies two days a week.
Together, they do the milking
and chores before going to
work.
“She’s getting a little more active now,” Sue
says, wondering how she’ll handle a toddler.
Sue is an innovative doer; thus, she’ll have
a solution before long. Sue is also a multitasker. During our interview, she was making a
large batch of cheesecakes for Southern Whey
in Southern Pines, one retail shop where her
products are sold. The Stovalls hosted a mulit-
course dinner at Southern Whey last month,
where a variety of their cheeses were used to
make the appetizers, salads (seen above), entrees
and desserts. Nature’s Own is another outlet that
carries their products in Southern Pines. Rhett’s
Restaurant features her cheese in select menu
items as well. Meanwhile, Sue was keeping her
eye on the machine that cools the fresh milk,
dashing between the industrial-size refrigerator,
trying to make adjustments to the cheesecake
recipe to fill many baking tins, baking the
cheesecakes in batches, watching the cooking
time, while deftly answering questions.
After starting slowly and gradually building
their reputation and herd size, Paradox Farms
became officially recognized by the North
Carolina Department of Agriculture (NCDA) last
April. The NCDA does periodic inspections to
check that the Stovalls are still in compliance,
which they continue to be.
“As baby boomers, we are starting to think
about the future, and the farm seemed to be a
good way to prepare,” Sue says.
When they stop doing their regular jobs, they
have the farm to keep them going.
“We’d like to build this business to the point
where someone in the future might be interested
in buying it.”
In addition to the goats, the Stovalls have 40
laying hens and 24 pullets. Now that she has
gotten used to fresh brown eggs, she wonders
how she ever ate others. Some of the eggs were
used in the cheesecakes she was making, giving
a warm soft yellow color to the cakes.
“This is real,” Sue says, smiling as she surveys
their animals and land and what’s needed to
keep things going on the farm.
Hunter shares Sue's sentiments about the farm
saying, "There's something new every day." ■
www.OutreachNC.com
Blueberry Goat Cheese Tarts
4 sheets of puff pastry, cut into 4 x 4 inch squares
1 cup goat cheese
¼ cup honey
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1 teaspoon vanilla
½ teaspoon dried thyme
1 pint fresh blueberries, rinsed
powdered sugar for sprinkling
Makes 4 tarts
Mix goat cheese, honey, thyme, lemon juice and
vanilla, and then fold in the fresh blueberries. Fold
each side of the puff pastry in to make a ledge all the way
around and place on a sprayed baking sheet. Put filling,
equally divided, into the puff pastries. Bake in oven at 350
degrees for 20-25 minutes until golden brown. Sprinkle
with powdered sugar and enjoy!
Torres, executive sous and pastry chef at Rhett's Restaurant, can
be reached at 910-695-3663 or [email protected].
Cooking Simple
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
37
38
OutreachNC • June 2013
A Passion for Music
By carrie frye
OutreachNC Staff Writer
W
ith just a few notes on the piano
and an unmistakable voice
crooning “It Had To Be You,” it
has to be Harry Connick Jr. That famous song
penned in 1924 came to life yet again as
part of the 1989 movie soundtrack to “When
Harry Met Sally.” That was just the beginning
for Connick’s Grammy Award-winning career
making beautiful music. Connick’s latest
album, “Every Man Should Know,” is available
June 11, bringing his fans some new original
songs to enjoy and providing an opportunity
for Connick to kick off a summer tour.
“I can’t wait. I love touring, and I really love
introducing new music to people,” says Connick,
45, who is bringing his 15-member band of
horns, rhythm and strings to Cary’s Koka Booth
Amphitheatre on July 9.
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
"Being a dad is
paramount, so everything
else falls into place."
— Harry Connick Jr.
“I like to mix it up and play some new songs
and play some older tunes. I’m excited to sing
these new songs since I haven’t sung these songs
to an audience, just in the studio. It’s like learning
a monologue as an actor and committing it to
memory. I enjoy learning the songs and going
through that process on tour.”
Connick, too, enjoys the process of writing and
never knows when inspiration may come, like
the title cut, "Every Man Should Know," which he
performed on mentor night on Fox’s "American
Idol" last month.
“Some of the songs are personal,” explains
Connick. “I was with my friend George, who is a
carpenter, and we were building a workbench, or
I guess I should say, he was building a workbench,
and I was more watching. He is a master craftsman,
and it was fascinating. I started to feel inadequate.
So I started thinking of all the things I didn’t know
how to do well and then about all the things that
I did know how to do, like loving my family. My
wife comes first, and that feels very natural to me
to be able to say things that are loving to my wife.
You may not be able to build a house, but every
man should know how to care and how to love.”
With 12 original songs on this album, it has
variety from jazz to country.
“I hope the fans know that this CD is really
personal. There’s no real agenda, that it’s almost a
stream of style. These are songs that I really wanted
to write. Every record is like that. I didn’t even think
about making a record. Sometimes it all comes
from a place of rhythm and passion,” says Connick.
Recording in Nashville, Tenn., Connick brought
the songs to the recording sessions looking forward
to what professional musicians like Bryan Sutton
would add, which is exactly what happened for
his song “Love My Life Away.”
“That tune is actually not about me. It’s a
complete fabrication,” he says. “It’s about the
awful feeling of losing someone to a disease,
about a guy who is dying of cancer. He’s at the
end of his days, mourning his last days. He knows
the end is coming, and as he drifts in and out, he
knows he wants to spend the rest of his life loving
this woman."
www.OutreachNC.com
continued page 40
39
40
OutreachNC • June 2013
continued from page 39
"The musicianship on that tune is so special. I sat down with
Bryan in Nashville, a great guitar player, and he said, 'So what
are we playing about?’ I told him, and it completely changed
the way they played it. I sang it while they were playing. Every
note Bryan played on the guitar was directly affected by the
story behind the song. I love that.”
Connick’s love for music began early in his native New
Orleans where he began playing piano and singing at the age of
5 continuing through his teens under the tutelage of jazz greats
James Booker and Ellis Marsalis. His Louisiana roots keep him
grounded and fueled his desire to be part of the reconstruction
of New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina. Connick and his
friend and fellow musician Branford Marsalis have been active
raising funds and awareness and building homes with the New
Orleans Area Habitat for Humanity, creating the Musicians
Village, which provides housing for displaced local musicians.
“Music is healing, and it is great, but it is a necessity to bring
the musicians back to New Orleans and make sure that there
were homes for them,” says Connick. “It’s hard work, and
we continue to work hard. It has been amazing with the Ellis
Marsalis Center for Music in the Ninth Ward.”
The center, located within the Musicians Village, is the
centerpiece, harvesting the many talents from music, theater,
dance and film through instruction and education and is just
one of Connick’s passions.
When he’s not composing music, Connick might be pursuing
another passion of his like acting. With big-screen roles in
“Memphis Belle,” “Hope Floats,” “P.S. I Love You” and “Dolphin
Tale” to notable roles on TV’s “Will & Grace” and most recently
on “Law and Order: Special Victims Unit," Connick has even
taken to the Broadway stage.
www.OutreachNC.com
“I love films, and Broadway is so much
fun. Fortunately, I really don’t have to pick.
Music is what I’d pick. It’s the common
denominator,” he says.
As for reprising his role on “Law and
Order: SVU,” Connick offers that he
would like to, but has no plans as of yet.
His research for his character, executive
assistant district attorney David Haden,
included taking tips from his father, a
former district attorney in New Orleans.
Connick knew from a young age he
would never follow his father's footsteps
in pursuit of a law career. His heart was
always in music.
“I knew when I grew up I wanted to play
with a lot of amazing musicians. I have
never really had expectations like letting
people know about my music. That’s never
motivated me. It’s about making the music
I want to make. It is about the body of
work. If you start chasing rainbows…,” he
says, laughing.
There’s no time for Connick to chase
rainbows with a busy family life. Married
to former Victoria's Secret model Jill
Goodacre for 19 years, the couple have
three daughters, ages 17, 15 and 10.
“Being a dad is paramount, so everything
else falls into place,” says Connick. “If
there is a birthday or school event, I am
there. And at the same time, I love being
on the road and touring, and my family
is so supportive of that. With Skype and
the latest technology now, there is an
accessibility.”
Connick hits the road for his new tour
June 19 in Baltimore, Md., traveling across
New England, the Southeast and Midwest
before wrapping up in Vancouver, British
Columbia, in mid August.
“I spend a lot of the time on the road
writing,” says Connick. “I write anywhere,
any time. Little ideas pop into my head,
a feeling or thought, and I go with it. It
always trumps whatever else is going on.
There is no rhyme or reason to it. Music
for me is every day. You’re humbled and
you learn. That is what growing up a jazz
musician has taught me. The results come
from hard work.” ■
OutreachNC • June 2013
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OutreachNC • June 2013
By thad mumau
Special to OutreachNC
PHOTOGRAPHY BY
diana matthews
A dream home of accessibility
Editor’s note: For 2013, we are featuring an
Aging in Place series with a piece each month to
take a serious look at all the aspects of creating
a plan to age in place. For previous articles
from this Aging in Place series, visit www.
OutreachNC.com and click on previous issues.
M
att and Ali Northen are not just
planning for the future. They have
built for the future. And in many
respects, the future is now, which is why
the couple have designed and constructed
a house suitable for folks who are “aging in
place” despite the fact that both are only in
their mid-40s.
“But my joints are much older,” says Matt, who
made more than 200 parachute jumps during
a military career that included deployments
in Kuwait, Afghanistan and Iraq. “Doctors are
already talking about replacing both of my
knees, and I have back, neck and shoulder
problems as well. Arthritis is spreading all over
my body. Most of my trouble is linked to all the
jumps I made.”
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OutreachNC • June 2013
Part 6 of 12 Part Series
Like her husband, Ali is retired from the military, each with
over 22 years.
“I’m not having the problems Matt is having,” she says, “but
my knees bother me some, and I know they will only get worse.
We wanted a house that would make it easier to get around,
one that would be more accessible than houses normally are.”
The Northens were living in Atlanta where Ali was working
with the U.S. Army. Right after being hired for that job, she
learned she would be transferred to Fort Bragg as part of the
Base Realignment and Closure move. Well in advance of that
move, they started scouting for a place to live in North Carolina.
continued page 44
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OutreachNC • June 2013
continued from page 43
They looked for property on which
to build, since buying a house and
renovating it would require too many
changes. They wanted to live in Moore
County where they would be in proximity
of Fort Bragg without the hustle and bustle
of Fayetteville.
They checked out every listing in Moore
County, going back and looking a second
time at some, before a 25-acre piece of land
became available. They purchased it and
came up with their own house plans.
“None of the ones we looked at were
what we wanted,” Ali says. “Matt and I
did a rough sketch and found an architect,
and he came back with three floor plans.
Then we did some tweaking and plugged
in details, basically coming up with our
personal floor plan.
“We decided right off the bat that we did not want to have
stairs in the house. There is only one step in the whole place,
and that is from the garage entering the house.
“Matt’s parents are older, and we didn’t want them to have
to worry about climbing or stepping up and down when they
came to visit. We wanted to make getting around easier for
them. We wanted the same for us – right now and with an eye
on the future, too.
“There are very few impediments in our home for people in
a wheelchair or using a walker. We have a walkway around
the entire house for a wheelchair.”
Among the features of the Northens’ house:
• no steps entering the showers or bathrooms;
• all hallways and doorways are wider;
• numerous open spaces allow easier movement;
• faucets are designed to be triggered by motion;
• all doors have latches rather than knobs;
• kitchen cabinets have sliding drawers;
• floors are all hardwood, which are easier on joints and also
better than carpet for navigation by wheelchairs and walkers;
• every closet has levels, the lowest convenient for someone
in a wheelchair;
• the refrigerators both have freezers at the bottom, making
them easy to reach.
continued page 46
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OutreachNC • June 2013
continued from page 44
“This is a custom-made home,” Matt points
out. “I was on hand for all of the work, from
the clearing of the first tree until the last nail
was driven.”
And numerous trees had to be cleared.
Ground was broken in early March of 2011.
“I rented a home a couple miles from here,”
he says, “and could get back and forth in a few
minutes. Ali was still in Atlanta. Everything in
this home was hand-picked – the lights, the
stone, the cabinets, the fixtures … everything.
She did most of that. She bought a lot of it in
Atlanta and had it shipped here. My wife is
very detail-oriented.
“My father’s builder was my builder. We
have known each other over 20 years. He
came up from Florida, and he and I framed
this house. Then he went back, and I hired all
of the sub-contractors. After everything else
was done, the man returned from Florida,
and he and I put down the hardwood floor.
That took both of us working seven days, 10
hours a day.”
From the day the first tree fell to the
conclusion of the whole project took eight
months, with the actual building taking six
months and 11 days.
“Ali and I spent our first night here on
Veterans’ Day 2011,” Matt says. “That meant
a lot to us, having both served in the military.”
The couple has named its place Northen
Pines. The landscaping is beautiful as is the
home’s interior, and as a bonus, there are
great neighbors.
“We really love it,” Ali says, "everything
about it. It’s wonderful coming home after
work every day. We love to entertain and do
quite a bit of that, and this is a great place
for it.”
“It is gratifying,” Matt says, “that together we
planned every aspect of the house and that I
was able to be involved in the building. I was
here for every bit of work that was done and
did a lot of it myself. This is a dream house.”
“And one," says Ali, "we can comfortably
grow old in together." ■
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Music transcends time
"Pack up your troubles
in your old kit bag and
smile, smile, smile."
I
keep
the
Sirius
satellite radio station Sentimental Journey
"40s on 4" playing in
my car whenever I take a
client to an appointment. Something about the old
familiar tunes seems to put them at ease, and we
end up singing along and sharing memories and
having a good time. The other day, the song "Pack
Up Your Troubles" came on, and it gave me pause
to think.
Why do the songs of the 1940s hold such an
appeal to my clients? Is it because there is an air of
familiarity? Is it because the songs have words you
can understand?
I actually came up with a different thought as to why
these songs and lyrics still have such an impact. Many
of the songs have themes relating to preservation,
optimism, self-reliance and a patriotic spirit. They
are filled with words of wisdom. "Accentuate the
positive, eliminate the negative and don't mess with
Mr. In-between," "pack up your troubles in your old
kit bag and smile, smile, smile," "praise the Lord and
pass the ammunition," "count your blessings instead
of sheep," "blue skies" and "God bless America" are
just a few that come to mind.
These songs transcend time. As the children of the
1930s and '40s grew up and are now growing old,
they face challenges that need the reassurance of
those optimistic songs. When facing transitions to
communal living facilities, difficulties in walking,
loss of independence in driving and a different life
as we knew it, we can draw on the wisdom and
inspiration of songs that got us through the Great
Depression and World War II. Sometimes we need
the gentle nudge to remember we are stronger than
we think. So "pack up your troubles in your
old kit bag and smile, smile, smile."
What songs help give you a boost to
realize you are capable, strong and
resilient? I'd love to know.
Share your musical
memories with Pollard
by emailing jenniferp@
aoscaremanagement.com.
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OutreachNC • June 2013
Grey Matter
See Grey Matter Puzzle Answers on Page 56
Across
1. Semester’s last exams
7. Right
13. Not using liquid
15. Small particle
16. Government
income (2 words)
18. Abbr. after former
colonel’s name
19. Expire
20. “Dear old” guy
21. Film crew member
23. Bursting at the ___
24. Angler’s hope
25. Embryonic sacs
27. Diminished
28. Having an unusual
power to attract
34. “Star Trek” rank:
Abbr.
35. Arab League
member
36. “Comprende?”
39. CPR maneuvers
41. Inside info
44. Believe in
45. Baylor’s home
46. Extract
51. Carve in stone
52. “A jealous
mistress”: Emerson
53. Run down
55. Clod chopper
56. House salesperson
(3 wds)
59. Drift
June Word Search
Alto sax
Anvil
Banjo
Bell
Bin
Bugle
Cello
Chang
Chanter
Cheng
Cittern
Crwth
Cymbal
Drum
Fife
Gong
Harp
Keyboard
Klavier
Lute
Lyre
Melotron
Moog
Oboe
Organ
Piano
Pipe
Quail
Rattle
Rebec
Regal
Santir
Saxhorn
Shawm
Tabor
Tambour
Traps
Tuba
Ukulele
Vihuela
Vina
Viola
Violin
Zither
60. Implement
61. Bad looks
62. The Rolling ___,
band
Down
1. A legitimate object
for ridicule (2 wds)
2. Heart, mind or soul
(2 wds)
3. Openwork fabrics
4. “___ we having fun
yet?”
5. “___ of the Flies”
6. Trig functions
7. Iron
8. All-night party
9. “___ moment”
10. Learned person
11. Solution resulting
when one material is
extracted from another
by a solvent
12. Thatched
14. Small freshwater
fish, e.g. carp or
minnow
15. Fat unit
17. Grassland
22. A.T.M. need
24. Aircraft
compartment
26. “Belling the Cat”
author
27. Great time
29. Actor Arnold
30. Babysitter’s handful
31. “Wheels”
32. A pint, maybe
33. Sue Grafton’s “___
for Lawless” (2 wds)
36. ___ hospitality
37. Settle snugly
38. Those with great
sensitivity to beauty
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39. Bill and ___
40. Anger
41. Grassy surface of
land (pl.)
42. Swerve while in
motion
43. Organ stop
46. Adam and Mae
47. Miles per hour, e.g.
48. Victorian, for one
49. Locale
50. Numbers between
12 and 20
53. Become tiresome
54. Batty
57. Deception
58. Baby’s first word,
maybe
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50
OutreachNC • June 2013
OutreachNC • June 2013
Carolina
Conversations
with AM 550 WIOZ's
Billy Bag-O-Donuts
By jennifer kirby
Special to OutreachNC
PHOTOGRAPHY BY
diana matthews
B
illy “Bag-O-Donuts” Brown hosts AM
550 WIOZ's “Sunrise in the Sandhills”
program each weekday from 6-9 a.m.
An Ohio native, he moved to North
Carolina after retiring from IBM in New York. Fullfledged retirement wasn’t in the cards, though.
Here, Brown talks about landing a radio job,
living in the South and why he loves “Jeopardy.”
ONC: Where did the nickname “Billy Bag-ODonuts” come from?
BB: When I first started working here, I used
to stop at Granny’s Donuts and I would bring in a
bag of doughnuts. And so they started calling me
Billy Bag-o-Donuts. Pretty simple.
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OutreachNC • June 2013
ONC: How long have you lived in North
Carolina?
BB: I moved here in September of 1997. I had
retired from IBM and gotten divorced, and my
brother got divorced around the same time that I
did. He had to rent a house after his divorce and
I was going to move to either Texas or Florida
or someplace cheaper than New York, and he
said, "Why don’t you just come down and we’ll
share a house here, and see if you like North
Carolina." After a year of living in Sanford, he
bought a house in Sanford, and I liked Pinehurst
because it reminds me of a New England town,
so I bought a house in Pinehurst.
ONC: Is there anything you miss about
living up North?
BB: No. A friend of mine died in 2009, and
I went back up there for his funeral and it was
like, "Oh my God, how did I ever live here?" It
was so crowded, and everything was different
and all built up. I lived in Westchester County,
just about 30 miles north of New York City,
and I’m perfectly happy here. It took me a long
time to get used to living in North Carolina,
but I’ve done it.
ONC: What were some of the things you
had to adjust to?
BB: The pace of darn near everything. New
York is different than North Carolina. They
move a little bit quicker up there, and there’s a
lot of pressure that you don’t have down here.
ONC: You’re married now, correct?
BB: I got married – it was a year March 10.
ONC: How was that?
BB: She didn’t do well – her knees buckled –
and of course I didn’t do well either. She had been
coming in on a regular basis on Wednesdays,
but I brought her in on a Monday, and she talked
about St. Joseph of the Pines. Eventually, I told
her, "That’s not really why I brought you in here. I
said, 'I brought you in because I wanted to know
if you’d marry me.'" And I put the ring up on the
desk, and she said, "Oh, Billy!" And I said, "No,
Ellen, will you marry me?" And she said, "It’s
beautiful!" And I said, "No, Ellen, this is a yes or
no, Ellen!" And you can hear my voice cracking.
So she said, "Yes!" And I said, "All right, that was
the right answer."
ONC: When you moved here, you were
retired. How did you wind up hosting your
own radio show?
BB: I know an awful lot about music, and my
brother was encouraging me to do something
with my knowledge. And I’m like, "What am
I going to do with it? It’s all trivia, it’s nothing
really important." But I did meet somebody
that worked here and asked, "If I wanted to get
into radio, how would I do that? Would I go to
broadcasting school? Get voice lessons?" And
they said, "Come on in!" So I did.
They were getting a new computer system,
and I learned the new computer system, and
a memo came out that said “Anyone with
questions on the new computer system, see
Rich or Billy.” And I said, "Billy doesn’t even
work here." So they said, "Well, maybe we
should hire you." So they did …
She’s from Long Island.
ONC: Did you meet her down here?
BB: I did. She is the director
of sales and marketing out at St.
Joseph of the Pines, and they were
a morning show sponsor, and I
proposed to her on the air.
We have it on a CD.
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OutreachNC • June 2013
continued from page 51
I did the FM on STAR 102.5 on Saturday
afternoons for a while, and then I left and was
gone for a couple of years. Then they asked me
if I wanted to do the morning show when that
opened up about five years ago and I said, "Sure."
ONC: How do you know so much about music?
BB: I’ve always been interested in music. I
played in a band for awhile when I was much
younger, and I’ve done some singing – I still sing
with the Swing Street Band here once in a while.
And for some reason I always remembered, like,
who’s the main singer of The Dubs, and what his
hat size was, just stupid stuff like that. But it always
stuck with me.
ONC: So are you good at all kinds of trivia? Do
you like “Jeopardy”?
BB: I love “Jeopardy.” “Jeopardy” is about all I
watch on television. Then it’s bedtime right after
that because I get up at 3:30 in the morning.
ONC: What do you do between waking up at
3:30 and going on the air at 6 a.m.?
BB: I print out the AP (Associated Press) wire
for both the AM and the FM stations to get the
news stories. I check the weather and give that
to the FM as well. I may load PSAs (public
service announcements) or put in the religious
programming for the week. I record the weather
for the day. I get here about 4:30 a.m. or so and
there’s enough to keep me busy until just about a
quarter 'til 6.
ONC: Are there any special segments on your show?
BB: I do a special music feature at 7:15 a.m. – it’s
a 15-minute presentation. For example, tomorrow
I’m featuring Vaughn Monroe and Bobby Vinton,
because Vaughn Monroe did songs in 1945 and
Bobby Vinton did the same songs in 1964, and I’m
doing a comparison between the original song and
the popular song that went to No. 1 20 years later.
ONC: Do you choose the songs you play?
BB: Yes, I do. There is a log that brings songs up,
but I have the choice to either play them or delete
them and make a selection from the system. I try
to do a wide variety. I do some big band stuff, and
I may play the Glenn Miller Band and then follow
them with the Eagles. Rarely anything past the ’70s.
ONC: You do a lot of after-hours work as a
representative of the station – serving as emcee
for community events and things like that. Do you
enjoy that aspect of the job?
BB: I do indeed. I guess I don’t have much of
an ego because I’m amazed, No. 1, that people
listen to me, and No. 2, that they have a good time
listening to me. I hear, "Oh, you do so much for the
community." And I'll say, "Really? … I’m glad to do
it. And it’s an awful lot of fun." ■
www.OutreachNC.com
Ask the hard questions now
to be prepared for later
W
ith the focus of
health care not
only on curative treatment
of disease but also treating
pain
and
symptoms
Life's Journey
of disease, physicians
and other health care
practitioners
want
to
involve patients in choices about their health.
End-of-life issues involve making personal
decisions about life while still healthy. Patients
can make choices for themselves regarding
cardiopulmonary resuscitation, use of ventilators,
nutritional hydration, dialysis and other advance
directive options. Patients can advise others what
they want in the event that they cannot make
decisions for themselves.
Some questions to ask yourself in making these
decisions are:
Who do I want to make decisions
regarding my health care if I can no
longer make them?
Do I want to have a feeding tube inserted if I
can’t receive adequate nutrition by mouth?
Do I want cardiopulmonary resuscitation
used after my heart stops beating?
Do I want to be placed on a ventilator to
maintain my breathing capacity if I am
unable to breathe on my own?
Do I want all my family members
knowledgeable about my choices if I am
unable to make them?
Do I want to experience a comfortable
dying process if possible?
1
2
3
4
5
6
Making individual choices about end-of-life
care for yourself helps others who love and care
about you understand your desires when this
time comes. If you have not completed advance
directives regarding your end of life wishes,
consider doing so to help yourself and those who
care about you. For further information, visit
wwww.secretary.state.nc.us/AHCDR.
Foushee, LCSW, a medical social worker with First
Health Hospice and Palliative Care, can be reached at
910-715-6000 or [email protected].
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
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OutreachNC • June 2013
Homegrown
goodness always in season
A
s spring melds
into
summer,
North Carolina’s
farmers
markets
abound
with a magnificent display of
produce. The state is blessed
with a profusion of markets.
They are ideal places to buy
healthy food direct from the
grower, support local farmers
and make new friends.
“There’s a pretty good little
crowd here today,” says Ronnie
Best, manager of State Farmers
Market in Raleigh, as he leads
the way down the bustling
thoroughfare of the Farmers
Building.
Row upon row of stalls
offers a bountiful crop of local
produce, plants and flowers.
It’s a feast for the senses. Every
www.OutreachNC.com
stand is bright with color. Fruit
scents mingle with the perfume
of lilac and geranium from the
plant stalls at the eastern side
of the building.
“Everyone wants local right
now, and that’s good," says
Best, moving from stall to
stall, greeting vendors, sharing
stories and sampling produce.
Everything sold in the
Farmers Building is grown in
North Carolina. Best and his
team inspect the farms and
verify that they are doing the
growing. He is proud of the
farmers’ diligence and their
ability to work to the needs of
their customers.
“They really do a wonderful
job of growing what people
want,” says Best.
OutreachNC • June 2013
OutreachNC • June 2013
By serena brown
Special to OutreachNC
PHOTOGRAPHY BY
carol wilson
The producers occupying
the stalls change as different
produce comes into season.
A handful of farms stay yearround.
“We’re here seven days a
week,” says Jeff Allen of Beth
Moore’s Produce. ‘It gets tiring
sometimes, but it is a fun way
to make a living.”
Allen recognizes the market’s
importance in maintaining
a healthy and sustainable
lifestyle.
"We need to keep the farms
growing," Allen says. “Food
doesn’t grow in a can. It has to
come from somewhere.”
Since 1991, the State Farmers
Market has been located
adjacent to Lake Wheeler
Road and Interstate 40. The
wholesale and retail markets
share the 75-acre campus. The
wholesale concerns operate 24
hours a day, 365 days a year.
The public gates are also open
every day, Monday to Saturday
from 5 a.m. to 8 p.m. and
Sunday from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m.
The public retail side of the
market is predominantly in the
areas of the Farmers Building,
Market Shoppes and Market
Imports. There’s an events
center with a commercial
kitchen for food demonstrations.
Those who have worked up
an appetite have a choice of
three onsite restaurants: the
Seafood Restaurant, Market
Grill and State Farmers Market
Restaurant.
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OutreachNC • June 2013
continued from page 55
The Market Shoppes building stands across from
the Farmers Building.
“It’s like a giant country store,” says Best, “with oldfashioned candy, drinks, coffee, jams, jellies, cheese,
fudge and North Carolina wines. We have a wide
array of things here.”
There are coolers for meats and cheeses. The
seafood stall is stocked with the freshest catch from
the North Carolina coast and open Thursday through
Sunday. The Market Grill sells food for simultaneous
walking and eating. There’s even a picture framer.
Crafts are available next to the Seafood Restaurant.
Around the corner is the Nahunta Pork Center,
catering to a pork lover’s every need.
For gardeners, there’s a Super Sod outlet, and
Market Imports offers over two acres of architectural
and decorative items sourced from all over the world.
The State Farmers Market is a year-round destination
for everybody, whether planning a day out or dropping
in to stock up on North Carolina produce.
From a large to a small scale, farmers markets are
the best way to come to know local farmers. In turn,
the markets enrich their communities with fresh,
homegrown food in convenient locations.
“We’re not here to compete with the big stores,"
says Lynn Epps of the Troy Farmers Market. "We’re
here for people who want something else.”
The Troy Farmers Market nestles on Main Street, in
the heart of the town. It’s a cozy market whose size
belies the available variety of local produce, meats,
plants, goat cheese, baked goods, handmade soaps,
crafts and wine.
“Our market offers something for everyone,” says
Epps. “The farmers rotate according to what they
grow and what’s in season.”
Lynn and her husband Donny Epps own Whipowill
Hill Farm, where they specialize in pasture-raised pork
and poultry, goats, poultry products and also livestock
for those who wish to produce their own food.
“You can raise healthy animals and have healthy
food – happy animals too,” says Donny, who favors
heritage breeds.
A strong respect for tradition runs through the
market. Soaps at A Wing and A Prayer Farm are
handcrafted using rainwater. Delicious Creations’
jams and jellies are made from family recipes.
“I tend to do things the old-timey way, which means
they take a little bit longer,” says Sheila Menendez of
Hope Farms. “I try to avoid any synthetic materials. I
grow 90 percent of my produce from seed. The other
10 percent, the cold crops, are grown from seedlings.
She laughs and adds, “I have a slight love affair
with seeds.”
“The farmers market made us all get to know
each other," says Lynn Epps. "We try to look out for
one another. If we don’t have something, we point
customers to the next table. We want everyone to
succeed.”
Shawn Dezern helps the Epps on their farm when
they need an extra pair of hands.
“We’ll go and trade work with each other, back
and forth,” says Dezern, whose Dezern Farms stand
is a gorgeous host of plants, flowers and herbs at the
Troy market.
“Here, customers turn into really good friends,”
says Lynn Epps. “It’s turned into something more than
being out here selling.”
Grey Matter Answers
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OutreachNC • June 2013
That sense of camaraderie is
Saturday mornings in downtown
in season at the Moore County
Southern Pines. The Thursday
Farmers Market.
morning market runs year round,
“I buy from everybody,” says
the others from spring to fall. With
Sara Webster of Millstone Farm
the three locations, market-goers
and Gardens. "We all support
can visit the closest location.
each other."
“They can walk and bring
Established in 1976, the Moore
their dogs and push their baby
market is a trailblazer for farmers
carriages,” says Harry Webster,
markets in the region. It has
market manager of the Moore
become a keystone to the area.
market.
“We have a lot of the same
At the Saturday market, there’s
people every week. This is their
live music, corn hole and hula
market. We like growing for
hoops. Local chefs give regular
people who really like to eat
cooking demonstrations using
good food. They
the fresh offerings
appreciate what
of the market.
we
do,”
says
“We
try
to
Jackie Sherrill of
keep a variety, so
David’s Produce
there’s a little bit
in Ellerbe.
of everything for
"Everything at
the
customers,”
this market has
says Sara Webster,
to be made here
who coordinates
(within a 50-mile
the nearly 40
radius), so it’s a
vendors. “Some
very local market,”
come to all three
explains
Amy —Shannon Thompson markets, some to
Sugg of Bonlee
two, some to one.”
A Wing and A Prayer
Grown Farm. “It’s
With
pastureTroy Farmers Market
like, ‘Get to know
raised
meats,
your farmer.’”
baked
goods,
Sugg sells plants and flowers
plants and produce, the Moore
grown on the farm, and pickles,
market offers furniture, jewelry,
relishes and jams homemade
pottery,
all-natural
beauty
from Bonlee’s own produce.
products and wares for the
In a reflection of the diversity
garden.
that characterizes this market,
Sharon Thompson of Hilltop
she also makes and sells
Angus Farm has a sideline in
homemade essential oils and
witty totes made from feedbags,
skin preparations.
which are perfect vessels for
The Moore County Farmers
market shopping.
Market operates three days a
“We enjoy it,” says Sara
week in different locations:
Webster. “We get to meet a lot
Monday afternoons at First
of people. The rewarding thing
Health in Pinehurst, Thursday
is that they enjoyed what they
mornings at the Southern Pines
bought – and if they come back
Armory Sports Complex and
to you, you know it was good.” ■
“I need a shirt that
says, ‘I meet my best
friends at the farmers
market.’ There’s
something different
about this one –
we’re like a family.”
To locate the nearest farmers market,
visit www.ncfarmfresh.com/farmmarkets.asp
www.OutreachNC.com
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Restaurant, Personal Chef & Catering
Fresh. Local.
Southern Gourmet.
Celebrate Summer
with our Courtyard Dining
Winner Best Dish NC 2012
Lunch Entrees:
Curried Fettucini
Salmon Burger
Dinner Entrees:
Shrimp & Grits
Rhett’s Signature Trout
Southern Cordon Blue
Crab & Avocado Salad
N.C. Ribeye
Lunch: Monday - Saturday 11am to 2:30pm
Happy Hours: Wed-Sat 3 to 5pm
Dinner: Wed-Thurs 5 to 9:30pm ‫ ׀‬Fri-Sat 5 to 10pm
132 W Pennsylvania Ave
Belvedere Plaza ‫ ׀‬Southern Pines
910.695.3663 | RhettsInc.com
58
OutreachNC • June 2013
Thanks, Dads;
Good Luck, Grads
T
his is Dads’ and Grads’ month. They are
closely related as without Dads’ support
through the years, there would be fewer
Grads. The importance of Dads doesn’t seem to
get the credit deserved. We make a huge fuss
for Mother's Day with all kinds of praise and
gifts. It is well earned. But Dads are not to be
forgotten. They often shy away from emotional displays
and likely wouldn’t know what to do with flowers and
flowery verse.
Fortunately for our culture, we are seeing more
involvement in family life by Dads. Some of this is out
of necessity—as our economy tanked, mothers were
able to get jobs but Dads had a harder time. Role
reversal became part of life. Mom would go to work
and Dad stayed home, looked after the kids, (perhaps)
cleaned the house. They learned quickly how to cook
and do laundry. Dads’ groups have been formed in
many areas. They need to talk about their lives with
Over My Shoulder
fellow Dads. We are lucky to have Dads willing to
become a more integral part of their families’ lives.
I salute the men who are willing to change a diaper,
burp the baby, take little Susie to ballet and Tim to soccer
practice. I am grateful for the Dads who love us, teach
us how to drive, forgive our youthful mistakes and show
us how to become worthwhile members of our society.
These are the Dads that give us our Grads.
Dads know that a college education will help Grads
have better lives—not just financially but spiritually,
mentally, philosophically.
At a graduation at Tulane University, the year after
Katrina, CNN’s Anderson Cooper was the speaker.
One of his first remarks was, “If you haven’t already
done so, look your parents in the eyes, hold them close
and thank them for their sacrifices. As hard as you
worked to get here, they have worked even harder.”
I don’t know about you, but I can’t remember one
word of my graduation speech. It was a sweltering hot
day. Many of my family were present, relieved that
after a break from education I had finally gone back,
taken a course or two a semester (never in the winter
in northern New York) and added a BA cum laude
to my Ontario teaching certificate. The Dad I have to
thank for that graduation was my husband, who had to
do a lot of “women’s work” – it was the 70s, after all –
so I could get to class and do my homework.
This year’s graduates are facing a shaky world. We’re
counting on them to help make things right again.
We’ll help, but what we’ve been doing needs a boost.
In 1980, Alan Alda told the graduating class at
Connecticut College, “You have to leave this city of
comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition.
You can’t get there by bus, only by working hard
and taking risks and by not quite knowing what
you’re doing.”
Grads, you’re not alone, your Dads have your backs.
Good luck to all...and, thanks, Dad.
www.OutreachNC.com
OutreachNC • June 2013
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OutreachNC • June 2013
www.OutreachNC.com