LEADERSHIP

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Y LEADERSHIP
Vision, Commitment, Action
Tim Lautzenheiser
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Contents
Foreword . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3
Introduction . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4
Letter to Student Leaders . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5
Leadership Truths—Part 1 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6
The Penalty of Leadership. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9
Ten Characteristics of High-Quality Leaders . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10
Winners and Losers. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12
Goals and Personal Inventory. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13
Getting Down to Work. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14
Problems or Possibilities . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15
Individual Goals . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16
Letter to Myself . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17
Character Traits of a Student Leader. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18
A Paradigm Shift for Today’s Leaders . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19
The Personal Values of Student Leaders . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20
I Went on a Search to Become a Leader . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21
Leadership Truths—Part II . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22
Notes. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28
Leadership: Vision, Commitment, Action
Tim Lautzenheiser
GIA Publications, Inc.
7404 S. Mason Ave., Chicago 60638
Copyright © 2006 GIA Publications, Inc.
All rights reserved.
Printed in the United States of America
Cover photo by www.gettyimages.com
G-6945
ISBN-10: 1-57999-607-8
ISBN-13: 1-978-57999-607-9
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Foreword
Is leadership learned or innate? And if it is learned, can it be taught?
Controversial questions such as these have haunted the discipline of
leadership probably since the time of Alexander the Great (if not well
before).
As Tim Lautzenheiser wisely understood decades ago, everyone
possesses a hereditary capacity to lead, and that capacity is enhanced
through training. Thus was born Leadership: Vision, Commitment,
Action, Tim’s most recent dynamic contribution to the genre.
Tim realized that just as the success of an English course isn’t rated on
its ability to nurture the next Hemingway, a Leadership Series’ main goal
is not necessarily to generate a Lincoln, Gandhi, or Churchill. Instead, a
democratic society is founded on the bedrock principle that the entire
community benefits from educating its population, just as an entire
organization benefits from nurturing its members consistently and
systemically to produce individual leaders.
Leadership: Vision, Commitment, Action is a brilliant, step-by-step
recipe for leadership development. Characterized by uncommon
eloquence, it vividly reflects Tim’s singular and passionately held views on
this topic, combined with the vast knowledge and experience he has gained
during his unmatched twenty-five-year track record for successfully
teaching leaders of all ages.
Lau Tzu stated, “A leader is one who serves.” This is a concept
embodied in every aspect of Tim’s life, his work, and his writing and
imbued in every page of this magnificent and meaningful book.
—Michael Kumer
Executive Director,
Nonprofit Leadership Institute at Duquesne University
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Introduction
Welcome to Tim Lautzenheiser’s recent contribution to the field of
student leadership. Leadership: Vision, Commitment, Action is
certain to become a valuable requisite resource for all aspiring young
leaders who are dedicated to creating a culture of excellence. The
following pages are filled with tried-and-true suggestions
guaranteed to add positive forward progress to all organizations
in reaching their given goals.
Tim’s relentless pursuit of effective and efficient
leadership training serves as a standard for everyone. His
popular workshop presentations continue to explore
the key elements of leadership success. Many of those
discovered fundamentals for goal attainment are within
this text.
We are very proud to have Tim serve as
Executive Director of Education for Conn-Selmer,
Inc. His vision and his guidance are integral parts of
our corporate mission statement. “Dr. Tim” is a
man who walks his talk; he truly is an exemplary
role model of selfless leadership in action.
It is with much enthusiasm that I invite
you to wrap your minds and your hearts
around this very special gift written by my
respected colleague and dear friend;
lifelong benefits await those who
embrace of the wisdom of this
master teacher.
—John Stoner
President/CEO,
Conn-Selmer, Inc.
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Letter to Student Leaders
GREETINGS!
Welcome to the elusive and challenging journey of LEADERSHIP. You have chosen the road less
traveled, and you are to be congratulated for taking this crucially important first step in a lifelong pathway
of self-discovery.
For the last three decades I have enjoyed the opportunity of working with student leaders throughout
the world; the experience has served as the basis for the information within this leadership manual. The
introductory data are certainly not conclusive, however, this handbook will offer some helpful suggestions
as you pursue your own leadership development.
Rest assured, every individual has the wherewithal to become a leader. Leaders are not born; leaders
are the product of a disciplined commitment to LEARNING, GROWING, and BECOMING. Leadership is
not something you do; leadership is something you are.
This is not a book you should read from beginning to end and then put on the shelf. Rather, it is an
ongoing study that is adaptable and relevant to your personal wants and needs. Flip to any page, and you
will find valuable leadership concepts that will help you deal with daily challenges.
Thank you for going the extra mile, thank you for realizing the importance of dedicated leadership,
thank you for believing in your unlimited ability to make a positive difference, and thank you for investing
in your most important commodity—YOUR FUTURE.
Best wishes for leadership success!
—Tim Lautzenheiser
President, Attitude Concepts, Inc.
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Page 6
Leadership
T r u t h s PartI
If you let other people do it
for you, they will do it to you.
We move toward what
we picture in our minds.
Learn to take individual responsibility for yourself, and don’t trust
others more than you trust yourself.
Trust yourself!
Happy people live in happy worlds,
and negative people live in negative
worlds, and it’s all the same world.
Visualization is a proven technique
that takes practice.
The harder I work,
the luckier I get.
Luck is a reflection of who you are.
Lucky people have an attitude of
good luck. It is self-created. We
become what we think about all the
time. The mind always leads us in
the direction of our most dominant
thoughts.
99% responsibility
doesn’t work.
Close doesn’t count. Real leaders
carry everything to the end. Their
lives are about constant completion,
to the nth degree!
Yesterday was the
deadline for all
complaints.
Real leaders do not have time
to complain. They use the energy
to solve problems, not to identify
them. Anybody can identify problems; the leader’s job is to fix them.
Good leaders are scarce,
so I’m following myself.
You have to bring into the context
the importance of who you are.
Take responsibility for who you are.
If you don’t like it, change! We can
only pass onto others what we have.
Demand the best of yourself.
The things that come to
those who wait, may be
the things left by those
who get there first.
Take initiative. Don’t sit back and
wait for it to happen. Be assertive,
not aggressive. Stand up for what
you believe in.
There is no growth
without discontent.
The road to leadership is very
rough. It will hurt, and you will
learn through the hurt. One must
risk in order to grow. It never ends.
6
People who
believe things
can’t be done
will go out and
prove they
are right.
You can be right or happy. What is
silly is there is no right or wrong. It’s
all just a human label to describe a
condition
Real leaders are the cause,
not the effect.
You are not waiting for it to happen
to you. You make it happen for you.
Positive environments are created
and fed daily.
Learn to create,
not compete.
Competition, when used to beat
someone else, will ultimately
destroy you. You compete for selfimprovement. Create through your
efforts; creation is a constant
process.
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Leadership Truths
L
All unhappiness is caused by comparison.
Anger is one letter
short of danger.
Real leaders do not compare. They support and create.
No two things are exactly alike. Enjoy individuality.
Real leaders will not fuss and fume. It’s wasted
energy. They will use the energy to make things
better. Always solving! Watch out for that temper. It
burns too many bridges. Ultimately, it burns up the
individual and becomes the source of burnout.
e
The biggest lie on the planet:
When I get what I want, I will be
happy.
Pleasing others has no guarantees of reciprocal gifts.
Simply do things for other people because you love
them. That’s all. The process of leadership is what
counts. Enjoy the process.
a
partI
It is not enough to aim;
you must hit the target.
So when you miss, don’t give up; keep firing. You
will eventually hit. All great leaders have failed
several times. The minute you choose not
to fail, you also choose not to lead.
Your success is measured by your
ability to complete things.
Leaders always make sure everything is completed.
They don’t leave things undone. Complete, complete,
complete, and then complete some more. Leaving
work for others to finish reflects an obvious lack of
responsibility.
d
You can be happy or you can be
justified; you can’t be both.
Justification is about being right. Leaders want
results, not proof that they are right. This is part of
the responsibility of being a leader. Wouldn’t you
rather follow a happy leader?
e
If you think something outside
yourself is the cause of your
problem, you will look outside
yourself for the answer.
Most advice is
worth what it
costs…
That’s why people drink, do drugs, commit suicide,
blame, seek revenge, etc. The leader constantly looks
within for solutions. There is no shortcut.
r
If you give up the need for
security, you will be secure
(paradox).
nothing!
The only thing that is real is experience. That’s why
you must continue to explore and be willing to be
hurt. Never do anything that would harm you or
someone else, but reach out; don’t pull back. Get to
the front and lead the pack. Lead!
If you want to be safe, don’t be a leader. Leaders risk.
They gamble; sometimes they win, and lots of times
they lose. The only true security is self-peace.
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We lose what we don’t use.
This includes intellect, health, the
capability to make decisions, talents,
leadership skills, communication skills,
etc.
If you and your friends
always agree, one of you is
unnecessary.
Love and agreement have nothing to
do with one another. Our likenesses
bring us together, but our differences
keep us together. Appreciate the
differences.
If you want to make an
enemy, try to change
someone.
Allow people to be who they are. Quit
making judgments about them. Allow
things to simply be. Leaders don’t have
time to create enemies; this takes
energy away from serving others.
Not to decide is to decide.
The worst decision is always no
decision. Make a choice! Even if it is a
wrong decision, you can correct it.
Indecision prevents growth.
Leadership
Truths
partI
When your ship comes in,
make sure you are willing
to unload it.
Once you are in a leadership position,
be sure you are willing to take on the
responsibility. It’s tough. You will
never know what is in store until you
take a leadership position. Hard work
works!
The best way to escape
from your problems is to
solve them.
Quit waiting for your problems to
work themselves out. Create some
forward progress, and go for it! The
“good fairy” will not drop by. Almost
all problems require communication.
Whom do you need to communicate
with? Be honest.
We weaken whatever we
exaggerate.
If at first you don’t succeed,
you are normal.
You are going to mess up a lot. The
more you mess up, the better the
chances you have of hitting. The only
way to truly fail is to not participate—
which is really quitting. Don’t quit!
Lead, follow, or get out of
the way.
This is good to remember as you are
working with people. One of the
greatest forms of leadership is being a
model follower.
Live as though it is your last
day on earth;
someday it will be.
All we are really sure of is now. Enjoy
it. We take so much for granted.
Leadership is a privilege—be thankful
for your leadership opportunity, and
don’t abuse it.
Real leaders do not lie. They tell it like
it is and avoid all personal hurt to
others in the process. Bending the
truth is a form of lying. Truth always
wins.
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The
Penalty
of Leadership
In every field of human endeavor, he that is
first must perpetually live in the white light of
publicity.
Whether the leadership be vested in a man or in
a manufactured product, emulation and envy are
ever at work.
In art, in literature, in music, in industry, the
reward and the punishment are always the same.
The reward is widespread recognition; the
punishment, fierce denial and detraction.
When a man’s work becomes a standard for the
whole world, it also becomes a target for the shafts
of the envious few. If his work be merely mediocre,
he will be left severely alone—if he achieve a
masterpiece, it will set a million tongues a-wagging.
Jealousy does not protrude its forked tongue at
the artist who produces a commonplace painting.
Whatsoever you write, or paint, or play, or sing,
or build, no one will strive to surpass, or to slander
you, unless your work be stamped with the seal of
genius.
Long, long after a great work or a good work
has been done, those who are disappointed or
envious continue to cry out that it cannot be done.
Spiteful little voices in the domain of art were
raised against our own Whistler as a mountebank,
long after the big world had acclaimed him its
greatest artistic genius.
Multitudes flocked to Bayreuth to worship at the
musical shrine of Wagner, while the little group of
those whom he had dethroned and displaced argued
angrily that he was no musician at all.
The little world continued to protest that
Fulton could never build a steamboat, while the big
world flocked to the river banks to see his boat
steam by.
The leader is assailed because he is a leader, and
the effort to equal him is merely added proof of that
leadership.
Failing to equal or to excel, the follower seeks
to depreciate and to destroy—but only confirms
once more the superiority of that which he strives to
supplant.
There is nothing new in this.
It is as old as the world and as old as the human
passions—envy, fear, greed, ambition, and the desire
to surpass.
And it all avails nothing.
If the leader truly leads, he remains the leader.
Master-poet, master-painter, master-workman,
each in his turn is assailed, and each holds his
laurels through the ages.
That which is good or great makes itself
known, no matter how loud the clamor of denial.
That which deserves to live—lives.
—from an advertisement in the Saturday Evening
Post, January 2, 1915; from the Cadillac Motor Car
Division
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High energy level: Because leaders are often asked to go the
extra mile, it is important that they have a high level of energy to
maintain a busy schedule, deal with last-minute duties, and be the
hardest worker of their group. The followers rarely will outwork
the leader. The leader sets the pace.
Know how to listen: Listening is such an important secret to
success. Not only is it important in taking instruction, but it is
mandatory in working with others. Listeners are few in number,
and we all appreciate someone who has time for us. A great rule
of leaders: keep your mouth shut and your ears and brain open.
Exude self-confidence: A role model can teach much more
than a teacher. A leader can become a role model if he or she gains
the respect of his or her followers with self-confidence. No one
wants to follow someone who lacks self-confidence. We want
secure and assured leaders paving the way for us.
High level of integrity: Leaders
understand the ultimate
importance of truth. They will always use complete honesty as the
basis for any and all of their choices. Any deviation from this will
ultimately endanger the group.
Sensitive to others:
Truly great leaders operate from a
position of we-us rather than I-me. They are integral parts of their
groups. They constantly avoid a posture of being over the other
person, but rather put themselves in the followers’ positions and
accommodate their needs. They sense the mood of the group as
well as the individuals, and this atmosphere is of constant concert
in their leadership capacity.
Willing to fail: Leaders know that they are human. They are
quick
to
admit
their
mistakes
and
equally
quick
to
correct them. They never push the blame on any unsuspecting
scapegoat, but they realize there is more strength in truth than in
looking right at another’s expense.
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High energy level
Sense of humor: Although there has to be
a disciplined focus on the goal, it is often
necessary to lighten up and allow the followers a
chance to relax, laugh, and then get back in
Know how to listen
action. Humor and silliness are not the same.
Humor supports forward motion, while silliness
restricts it.
Exude self-confidence
Exemplify optimism: Leaders do not react
with undue trauma to problems but realize that
within every problem lies an opportunity for
growth and forward progress. They welcome
k
High level of integrity
problems as a chance to test their leadership and
gain self-improvement.
Avoid comparison games:
Sensitive to others
Leaders
realize that most comparison stems from
insecurity. Their goal is not to be better than
someone else, but rather to be the best that they
Willing to fail
can be. This allows the group to be the best that
it can be. Competition turns into cooperation,
and all competitive spirit is used to improve the
situation for everyone.
Caring and sharing:
Sense of humor
True leaders will
never hurt intentionally, even though they
k
k
Exemplify optimism
understand there will be times when individual
wishes will be overlooked in favor of the group’s
welfare. They understand that part of leadership
is taking some of the heat from those unpopular
Avoid comparison games
decisions, and they accept this responsibility
with strength and dignity. Their sense of
caring is ultimate, and their willingness to share
every ounce of talent and ability is top priority in
Caring and sharing
their actions.
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WINNERS correct their mistakes before other people notice them.
WINNERS work hard to attain excellence.
WINNERS know that there is no “I” in team.
WINNERS are self-confident and avoid comparing themselves to others.
WINNERS know that more love, not things, is the key to success and happiness.
Losers provide excuses for their mistakes instead of correcting them.
Losers try to justify their behavior to inflate their sagging self-images.
Losers tend to be cynical and suspicious.
Losers deny the desire they have to win.
Losers have trouble loving themselves.
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Goals and Personal Inventory
Dream:
Write down five things you would like to accomplish as a leader by this time next year.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Plan:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Next, write down five things that you want to accomplish as a leader by next week.
Work:
Finally, write down five things you want to do as a leader by tomorrow.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Now, in order to accomplish what I want as a leader, I need to take a personal inventory of my strengths
and weaknesses so that I can get down to work.
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Getting down to Work
My five strengths as a leader are:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
My five weaknesses as a leader are:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
The quality I respect most in a leader is:
The quality I respect least in a leader is:
What I fear most about being a leader is:
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1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Page 15
PROBLEMS
or
Possibilities
The five steps to solving any problems are:
(written in cooperation with Steve Hoernemann)
Recognize/Clarify
Define the problem:
Outline the parameters of the problem.
Decide how you would like the parameters of the problem to change.
Analyze
Soak up ideas about the problem:
Put yourself in someone else’s shoes.
Decide how you would like the parameters of the problem to change.
Create
Determine a direction to solve the problem:
Decide what, if anything, you are going to do about the problem.
Follow the direction you’ve chosen, at least initially.
Implement
Try it out:
Test the direction and remain flexible with it.
Be willing to risk.
Realize and accept the insecurities you will need to deal with along the way.
Reevaluate
Did it work?
Question whether the direction you took worked.
Be honest in your evaluation of the direction.
Decide what needs to change for the direction to be more successful.
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Individual
Goals
Being a leader is not a part-time job.
Look over your personal inventory.
What drives you to become a leader?
What are your goals for the group?
How would you describe your tone of voice?
What methods do you use to get everyone’s attention?
What is your track record in achieving goals?
Who are your mentors, and what do you admire about them?
What negative mannerisms do you try to avoid?
What leadership qualities would you like to develop or strengthen?
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Letter to
Myself
Name: ____________________________________________________________________
Address: __________________________________________________________________
Phone:__________________________________________
Today’s date:____________
The next time I read this it will be approximately one month from now. I will have
accomplished the following during that time:
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
Signature:
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Character Traits of a
Student Leader
Student leaders should be:
Selfless
Always take the time to help those around you. This important trait—consideration for others—can be
observed before and after rehearsals.
persistent
Tenacity is an attribute necessary for attaining excellence at any discipline. Many people will begin a new
endeavor with a sense of positive enthusiasm, but student leaders need to “complete” their assigned
responsibilities. We are not measured by what we begin but by what we complete.
Consistent
You are at a time in your lives when you are establishing personal habits and life values; you are truly
deciding “who you are.” Dreams, goals, and desires can shift radically from one day to the next. Students
set themselves apart by being predictable and demonstrating emotional stability, the ability to “stay the
course.”
affable
Being a gifted musician is an important quality for students leaders. However, it is also vital for the student
leader to have a healthy rapport with the other members of the organization. Popularity aside, you must be
recognized and respected by the majority of the group.
honest
Slighting the truth is commonplace. Anyone who avoids the temptation to exaggerate or embellish the truth
and is willing to accept the consequences that often accompany honesty is a rare commodity. Everyone will
benefit from being in the presence of a person who demonstrates such personal integrity.
Faithful and Loyal
“United we stand, divided we fall.” This well-worn phrase is still classic advice for every leader. At this stage
of leadership, commitment to the group is mandatory and any disagreements or issues should be dealt with
behind closed doors and in strict confidentiality.
These six personality traits are only a starting point;
however, these traits establish a strong foundation for the
selection and qualifications of any student leader.
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A Paradigm Shift for
Today’s Leaders
The entire realm of leadership training has taken a dramatic shift over the past three decades or so. The
strong-armed approach to leadership success has given way to the concept of allowing the follower to become
an invested contributor to the overall mission. There is a greater emphasis on intrinsic motivation rather than
using extrinsic rewards as a means to individual or group achievement.
The cornerstones of this paradigm shift emphasize a win-win concept embracing both the requirements
of the project responsibilities and the welfare of the people involved. This philosophical shift diminishes the
power struggle often associated with the traditional positioning, turf protection, rank-and-file status, etc. To
find success in this modern-day blueprint of leadership style, these four laws of leadership must be
understood and integrated into every decision and serve as the foundational blocks of contemporary
leadership.
People are more important than titles.
The focal point remains on the welfare of the people
involved. Leaders constantly monitor the overall attitude of
the group, ensuring a sense of mutual understanding and
synergistic effort based on individual and group commitment to
focus on the agreed objectives.
We can’t lead others until we lead ourselves.
Role modeling plays a vital part in the leader’s ongoing communication
with the members of the organization. While delegation is still an important
aspect of the process, the leader sets the pace by demonstrating the
expectations and the standards desired to achieve positive results. The most
effective form of leadership is positive role modeling.
Leaders are measured by what they give.
Leadership is an opportunity to give to those who are part of the group, organization, or ensemble. The position of leadership is a license to help all those who
are part of the forum. If there is not a measured contribution to the forward
progress of the group, the value of the leader is diminished to the point of being
“merely a title carrier.”
Leaders assume total responsibility.
When something goes awry, the leader immediately assumes the responsibility for the
breakdown rather than pointing the finger of blame at anyone else. The welfare of the
followers is primary in every facet of the leader’s agenda.
Adapting this new leadership consciousness to any musical ensemble offers the players a greater
opportunity to “own the group” and accept the responsibilities for the positive growth and development of
the organization. Everyone wins.
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The Personal Values
of a Student Leader
Leadership is made up of two philosophical components:
1. Leadership is for giving.
2. Leadership is forgiving.
Many people see a leadership position as the chance to be in charge, to tell others what to do, to delegate
work, and to put themselves in a posture of authority. Nothing could be further from the truth. The essence
lies in the leader’s ability to serve others, to create success for the people in the organization. It is the
opportunity to give, to contribute, to roll up one’s sleeves and begin moving in a positive, forward direction.
Whether it is straightening the chairs, putting the stands away, creating a colorful bulletin board, or working
with someone on a musical passage, the leader is the person who does the task at hand. A leader does “what
needs to be done, when it needs to be done, whether he or she wants to do it or not, without anybody
asking.”
The second aspect of leadership centers on the concept of forgiving. When something goes awry (and it
will), many leaders want to react to the situation by reprimanding the followers for their inability to fulfill
their suggestions. However, the true leader will forgive the people involved and proactively refocus his or her
energies to correct the problem and quickly get back on course. Psychologically (and intellectually) we know
that people do not get better when they are made to feel worse.
All too often, there is a tendency for young leaders to chastise those who fall short on the given
assignment; nothing could be more detrimental to the trusting relationship necessary for future success in any
leader/follower relationship. The solution is simple: forgive, correct, and proceed forward.
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I Went on a Search to
Become a Leader
I went on a search to become a leader.
I searched high and low.
I spoke with authority; people listened.
But alas, there was one who was wiser than I,
And they followed that individual.
I sought to inspire confidence,
But the crowd responded, “Why should I trust you?”
I postured, and I assumed that look of leadership
With a countenance that flowed with confidence and pride,
But many passed me by and never noticed my air of elegance.
I ran ahead of the others, pointed the way to new heights.
I demonstrated that I knew the route to greatness.
And then I looked back, and I was alone.
“What shall I do?” I queried.
“I’ve tried hard and used all that I know.”
And I sat down and pondered long.
And then, I listened to the voices around me.
And I heard what the group was trying to accomplish.
I rolled up my sleeves and joined in the work.
As we worked, I asked, “Are we all together in what we want to do
And how to get the job done?”
And we thought together,
And we fought together,
And we struggled towards our goal.
I found myself encouraging the fainthearted.
I sought ideas of those too shy to speak out.
I taught those who had little skill.
I praised those who worked hard.
When our task was completed, one of the group turned to me and said,
“This would not have been done but for your leadership.”
At first, I said, “I didn’t lead. I just worked like the rest.”
And then I understood, leadership is not a goal.
It’s a way to reaching a goal.
I lead best when I help others to go where we’ve decided to go.
I lead best when I help others to use themselves creatively.
I lead best when I forget about myself as leader and focus on my group...
Their needs and their goals.
To lead is to serve...to give...to achieve together.
—Anonymous (as it should be...)
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Leadership
T r u t h s PartII
You can only have two things
in life, reasons or results.
Reasons don’t count!
Angry people
are those who are most
afraid.
So many people can tell you why they did this or
that. They can explain in eloquent language the
justification for the incompletion of some task.
The fact remains: it isn’t done. This inevitably
means someone is going to have to pick up the
slack because another person reacted instead of
acted.
Anger is an emotion of frustration. “I’m not
getting what I want.” Whether this frustration
comes from another person’s behavior, material
objects, time considerations, etc., the angry
person is frustrated and will vent his or her
anger. This person will cause a little trauma and
throw everyone else out of kilter. (Some people
cause trauma so they feel needed or important.)
One example is the popular game of oneupmanship to determine who has it worse.
If you are constantly being
mistreated, you’re cooperating with
the mistreatment.
There is no way to know
before experiencing.
People treat us as we teach them to. If someone
is not treating you the way you want to be
treated, don’t allow this to go on by being silent
and miserable. Express your dislike for the
treatment. You needn’t be hostile, just honest.
Try to explain how to ride a bike or climb a
mountain to a novice—you can’t. Participation is
the only way. That’s why it’s so important to
keep “doing.” Don’t think you can read
everything in a book. Do it! (Qualifier: Never
put yourself or others in jeopardy.)
Trying provides two excuses,
one for not doing
and one for not having.
What you say is exactly
what you intended to say.
As long as I just try, then I have built in the
acceptance of incompletion in the initial concept
and can always reiterate with “Well, I tried.”
There is no “try.”
The “I’m sorrys” of life simply do not exist.
Blanket forgiveness is wonderful in principle, but
it does not work in reality. Make sure you are
ready to take responsibility for whatever you say.
There are no second chances. I’ll forgive, but I
won’t forget it. People remember everything as
truth, even teasing. You must choose your words
carefully.
You cannot control
without being controlled.
k
The game of control is a game, and you cannot
play it unless you are also subject to it. If I want
you to acknowledge my position of power, then
I have to acknowledge every else’s position of
power, or my position doesn’t mean anything
to start out with. Thus, there are other people
who must control me. The ultimate control, of
course, is self-control, which is all there is
anyway. Take control.
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Leadership Truths
If you worry about what might be
and wonder what might have been,
you will ignore what is.
partII
Solutions are only good for the
moment; there are no generic,
all-purpose solutions.
It’s the whole theory of ignoring the now, which
is all there is, simply now. Get your thoughts out
of the past and the future. Ninety percent of
what we spend time worrying about never
happens.
The magic answer, the pot of gold at the end of
the rainbow, etc., are only myths. Solutions in
any situation are usually only good for that
situation, a one-way street. There are no pat
answers to leadership. True leadership is a
constant path of discovery.
Before you break out of prison, you
must first realize you’re locked up.
Criticize the performance,
not the performer.
You can’t correct anything until you admit there
is something to take care of. Self-admission is the
key to all alcohol and drug abuse programs. Selfanalysis is an ongoing process. “Coolness” and
leadership don’t mix.
Avoid taking shots at the self-worth of another
human being. We are all the experts on
ourselves. You have no idea what the other person
is going through. Their performance may well
have been a miracle under the circumstances.
When you blame others,
you give up your power
to change.
Success is all you’ve ever had;
even failure has taught you
what not to do.
Once again, you have given control to others.
You are always at the effect of these people. No
one is a failure until he or she blames another
person. Blame takes energy. Can you afford to
spend you energy in this fruitless effort? This is
energy you should be using to lead.
We started with nothing. Look at what you have
had to this point and what lies ahead. Smile. If
you are to this point with the effort you have
given, think what it could be. You may be a
genius and simply need to discover it. You are
ultimately the cause of everything that happens
to you. Knowing this, be careful what you cause.
Take responsibility for your life. Your followers
will always reflect your own sense of leadership.
Take a look at them, and see how you’re doing.
Whatever you are willing to put up
with is exactly what you will have.
People will violate your space as long as you let
them. Often, unknown teasing can become a
sore spot. Don’t put up with it if it hurts.
Otherwise you once again give others control.
Watch that you don’t allow yourself to get cheap
attention at the expense of another person.
There is no right or wrong,
only consequences.
Right or wrong is a label. We must simply deal
with what is and what our actions cause. Take
responsibility; you will anyway. Leaders are
always exposed. Your consequences will be
public. Take responsibility.
Your interpretation of anything
is merely that:
your interpretation.
Just because you see it that way doesn’t make
it so. We all see things differently. That’s why
there are different kinds of music, different arts,
etc. Opinions are opinions, nothing more, just
opinions.
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Leadership Truths
If you require someone to change,
you will probably force that person
to lie to you.
partII
Excuses are your lack of faith
in your own power.
Making excuses for not going for it is an attempt
to justify your own inadequacy out of fear. Our
society demonstrates expertise in excuses. Real
leaders don’t excuse mistakes; they correct them.
If I have to be a certain way to maintain your
approval, it is easier to lie than to lose the
relationship. We somehow know when people
are lying, which means they are not following
your lead.
Things are not what they seem;
they are what they are.
We fear the thing we want most—
success.
Don’t complicate the simplicity of anything by
reading into it more than what it is. How can we
effect change until we are willing to admit what
is?
The “what ifs” of life come up extra strongly.
Confront the fear so you can get what you
want. To avoid it is to ensure that you will
never complete your task. So you can’t move
on. You’re stuck. Once you succeed, new
opportunities will open to you.
If you don’t like the games
people play, make up your
own games.
Feelings of inferiority and
superiority are the same;
they both come from fear.
Don’t punish yourself by thinking there
are no other games. Choices are there
for all of us. What a gift! Don’t try to
fit a square peg in a round hole. Hitting
the wall for the sake of hitting it can be
painfully stupid.
Again, these are labels promoted by society,
human-made labels that only mean anything to
other fearful people. You are you. When you
accept that, then and only then can you really
lead.
There are many things I want
but few things I need.
After all is said and done,
much is said and little is done.
Don’t get these two confused. Need is a
necessity; want is a luxury. Self-indulgence may
be the greatest form of selfishness. You don’t
need to be a leader; you choose it. Enjoy your
choice.
Action, not reaction. You build the wall by
moving one brick at a time. The dignity of doing
is what it is all about. Quiet leadership is so
effective. And don’t run around with all your
trophies. It’s boring.
The biggest risk in life is not risking.
If you have a college degree, you
can be sure of one thing:
you have a college degree.
Sideline coaches are a dime a dozen; there are
thousands of people in the stands and two
coaches. Risk; be willing to fail. Come to grips
with the fact that the only way to win is to risk.
Don’t let the grades, paper, etc., make you think
you are smart and knowledgeable. Wisdom of
knowing is boosted by data, not the other way
around. You cannot rest on your laurels.
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Leadership Truths
partII
There is brutality, and there is
honesty; there is no such thing
as brutal honesty.
Any system that takes the
responsibility away from the
people dehumanizes them.
More simply, never hurt anyone intentionally,
NEVER.
Everything is about people. We must take care of
people, not the system. The system can’t feel.
Great leaders always have great people skills.
This happens via practice.
If you are not leaning,
no one will ever let you down.
Most times we do not
communicate;
we just take turns talking.
We must depend on ourselves. We are alone in
our humanness. Self-reliance is ultimate. Leaders
have to stand on their own.
Sharing and caring are rare in communication
versus plastic “filling up time.” Are you saying
what needs to be said to make a difference or just
talking to talk?
Don’t concern yourself with being
normal. Be natural; it’s normal.
It’s easy to get caught up in the “I have to be
like” world of all of us being the same. You are
you. You will always be you. You are normal.
If you are afraid to lose anything
you have, probably, at some point
in your life, you will lose it
(self-fulfilling prophesy).
If you have made yourself
important, notice that it is a lie.
Importance is a label. People who are really
important cannot understand that label. Nor do
they acknowledge it. They simply live to give.
Importance has to do with ego. Service has to do
with leadership.
This could be a boyfriend, girlfriend, job,
promotion, grades, etc. The mind leads you in
the direction of the most dominant thought. Put
good thoughts in your mind. Leaders are
optimistic.
Worry comes from the belief that
you have no ability to affect your
situation.
The way to win
is to make it okay to lose.
Play the game for the sake of playing the game.
There is no real first place, and those who seek it
will eventually trip themselves up. What we fear
comes true! We only compete with ourselves.
You can make any choice at any time. What are
you worried about? You are in charge of you.
You have the controls. Use them. To be out
of control shows avoidance of leadership responsibility.
What you are afraid to do
is a clear indication of what you
should do next.
Your ability to relax is in direct
proportion to your ability to trust
life and yourself.
Confront the situation. Clear it up. Don’t let it
occupy your present moment any longer. If it is a
problem, solve it. You will anyway! Use your
sensitivity in your favor, and address the
thoughts.
If you’re burnt out, it indicates a lack of selftrust. What’s the hurry? Where are you going?
There are leaders who find the hard work
therapeutic. Enjoy!
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Leadership Truths
If you are honest because
honesty is the best policy,
then your honesty is corrupt.
partII
Whatever you are trying to avoid
won’t go away until you confront it.
What you resist persists. Get it cleaned up. Don’t
let it linger and be like an aching tooth. Handle
it. Life is about handling these things. If you
don’t, they will take control of your life. If there
is anything in a fundamental relationship that is
uncomfortable, it will come through in your
leadership style.
Truth simply makes things work. Morals are not
morals if they are forced. Honesty for the sake of
care is the only way. The truth will win out.
Honesty is the easiest thing in the world.
Some people are willing to work
if they can start at the top
and work their way up.
If you don’t start,
it is certain you won’t arrive.
In other words, the shortcut is to take the “longcut.” Fame and fortune are available to all
through one thing: perseverance. Although we
live in a society of instant gratification, it simply
doesn’t work. People who reach the top do it by
heading up the mountain. Head forward.
This also provides a great excuse for not
getting there. You simply didn’t start. If
I don’t go for it, then I can’t mess up.
Then I can stand back and take cheap
shots at all those who did go for it and
fell short.
The thing we run from
is what we run to—life is cyclic.
What you can’t communicate
runs your life.
Whatever you fear is generally dominant in your
thoughts. Your mind leads you in the direction
of your most dominant thought; thus, your
self-fulfilling prophecy comes true. Simply
eliminate false fears.
Unresolved, incomplete communication, whatever you hang onto is in control of you because
it dominates your thoughts. Let go. Once again,
we find communication is the key to successful
leadership. Do it!
You will always get
what you expect.
If you don’t have what you want,
you are not committed to it 100%.
This is the inverse of the thought above. Shoot
for the moon; if you come short, at least you’ll
land in the stars. Self-worth is built on what you
expect. Self-worth guides your every move.
Expect the best! Why would you think Pinto if
you can think Porsche?
We give a lot of lip service to what we want, but
when it comes to getting it, the energy stops. If
you are committed to being a leader, nothing
will stop you. Nothing!
Your enemy might be your best
friend if you allow him or her to be
who he or she is.
Others can stop you temporarily;
only you can stop you permanently.
Disagreement is one of the greatest expressions
of love there is. It’s our likeness that brings
us together but our differences that keep us
together. When we don’t allow people to be as
they are, it is our own fear controlling us again.
We find in others the qualities and weaknesses
we have in ourselves. Takes one to know one!
Champions expect to be champions. Winners
expect to win. They visualize it and relive it a
thousand times in their minds. No one can stop
you at anything. If you listen to the negatives
of others, you’re making their opinion more
important than your own. It’s where many
people get caught up in the game of approval.
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Leadership Truths
Maturity consists of not having to
meet the approval game.
partII
You are the only teacher
you will ever have.
Maturity means feeding the self-worth and
exercising the talents we have. Quit looking over
your shoulder. Approval is a game of addiction.
You will never get enough; it is not a need.
In other words, if you think some guru is going
to come along and enlighten you, you are
crazy! Nor will you be a guru. Be kind
to yourself as a teacher. Teach
well. Be demanding.
Life always keeps
its agreement with you.
We are all dying and won’t ever get a moment
back to relive. Do we not owe it to life to give all
the time? We get from life exactly what we put
into it. Invest!
There is none so righteous as the
newly converted.
When you have to convince someone of your
convictions, then are they really honest? You
don’t need agreement if you are a real leader—in
fact, you may not have time for it.
Hoping and wishing
are excuses for not doing.
These are fantasy excuses. They simply don’t
exist. They are lies; if you check, you will find
they deal with past and future. Being human is
now.
He who laughs, lasts.
If you don’t know what direction to
take, you haven’t acknowledged
where you are.
Lighten up! When you think it is so
bad you can’t stand it, go to a nursing home. We have so much. Smile!
You’ve got it made.
Self-admission is the basis and so easy. If you
look, your direction will always be there.
If your life isn’t working
the way you want it to,
notice that you’re lying.
You are in charge. If it is not the way you want
it, why haven’t you changed it? Quit lying to
yourself. This is self-abuse! Why would you
possibly want it not to work? How can you lead
others if you can’t make it work?
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Notes:
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