Meetings: Do`s and Don`ts

6)AATODAY
ROCKFORD AREA INTERGROUP
NEWSLETTER
JULY/AUGUST 2013 Volume 20, Number 3
Milestones
(Double digit AA birthdays in multiples of
5 years in June, July)
10 years
• Kelly J., HOW
• Jeanine S., Healthy Solutions
• Kjell L., Loves Park
15 years
• Gregg H., Downtown
• Joe M., HOW, 5th Avenue, P. Purpose
• Jim B., Healthy Solution
• Lac, 5 O'Clock Shadow
20 years
• Nancy K. Belvidere Travelers, HOW
• Maggie D., HOW
25 years
• Nancy J., Downtown
• Jim W., HOW
• Jim G. HOW
• Harry N., Muddy River
• Curt E., New Attitudes
• Rita V., New Attitudes
30 years
• Chris J., HOW, H. Solutions, Over 50
• Roger D., Muddy River
35 years
• Brent B., Healthy Solutions
40 years
• Linda C., Healthy Solutions
Meetings: Do's and Don'ts
Did you know?
"Miss Manners" is a nationally syndicated newspaper column
that offers suggestions on how to behave in society.
• The 19th annual Rockford
Intergroup/District 70 picnic
is July 28 at Alpine Park.
(See flyer, Page 7)
The following Top 10 list is a "Miss Manners" for Alcoholic
Anonymous meetings. These are some meeting-related
suggestions from seven Rockford-area AA members who
averaged more than 30 years' sobriety. These are good ideas
for both the AA newcomer and seasoned AA member.
You will not find these suggestions in the Big Book, but they
will help you while trudging the Road of Happy Destiny.
DO:
• Listen: Listening is a skill that can be practiced. Try to give
your undivided attention to whomever is talking.
• Come early, stay late: It helps you to get to know the other AA
members. You can help set up the meeting and clean up
afterward.
• Be a regular and chair meetings: Have a meeting you attend
regularly so you feel comfortable sharing your experience,
strength and hope. You can start chairing meetings and
giving leads there when asked or told to do so by a sponsor.
Continued on Page 6
• AA Big Books are a sale
item on eBay, and some at a
high price. Last month the
asking price for a first
edition, first printing Big
Book was $10,125. A first
edition, fourth printing Big
Book was listed at $3,750.
• More than 44,000 AA
members attended the
2005 International
Convention in Toronto. More
than 50,000 were at the
2010 convention in San
Antonio. The 2015
convention will be in Atlanta.
• Going on vacation this
summer? You can find info
on AA meetings across the
country online at aa.org,
JULY/AUGUST
6-MONTH
FINANCIALS
Dec.
PAGE 2
AATODAY
2013
(in $)
Jan.
2,360
YOUR CONNECTIONS
Feb.
2,415
March
April
May
Group Donations
2,001
Thank you to these
groups that contributed
for your generosity:
Augury
Belvidere Travelers
Downtown
East Side H.O.W.
Five O'clock Shadow
Healthy Solutions
Loves Park
Muddy River
New Attitudes
Over Fifties
Upper Room
Starting
balance
2,153
Income
1,752
2,433
1,434
2,100
2,541
1,847
Disbursement
-1,545
-2,378
-2,790
-2,558
-2,779
-2,368
Prudent Res.
Transfer
0
0
0
0
0
0
Balance
2,360
2,415
1,060
1,060
602
602
2,001 *
1,480
PRUDENT RESERVE: $5,884.28 (end of March)
* Adjusted figure after bookkeeping miscalculation
Intergroup volunteers
May/June
Thank you to these volunteers
who've given of their time in
handling afternoon office
responsibilities:
Chris O'M
Don H.
Don Z.
Gail N.
Jeanne M.
Kevin S.
Les H.
Maggie D.
Marajane P. Mike R.
Pete N.
Ray G.
Rebecca F. Steve C.
Susie D.
statistics
To volunteer, call 815-968-0333
office
Phone calls
Visitors
Meeting info
Literature/coin
sales visitors
12-step calls
Miscellaneous
AI-Anon calls
Total
72
75
55
31
Board of Directors
5
Chair:
56
Vice-Chair:
o
Secretary:
183
Treasurer
Service
12-step calls
Meeting info
Total
ANOYMOUS
Rockford Intergroup,4040 Charles St.,
Suite 201, Rockford, IL 61108; 815968-0333
Email: [email protected]
WEBSITES
Rockford Intergroup: rockfordaa.org
District 70: district70aa.org
District 71: aadistrict71.org
AA World Services: aa.org
At Large
Ray G.
Kevin D.
Dale H.
Patti S.
Becky M.
Linda W.
Mike R.
Office Mgr
Kelly J.
At Large
Answering
TO ALCOHOLICS
At Large
o
53
53
Newsletter
Editor
Doug G.
URGENT:
Webmaster needed
The Rockford Alcoholics
Anonymous website
(rockfordaa.org) needs a
volunteer webmaster. This is a
fine opportunity for service
work.
We will lose the website soon if
no one volunteers.
Please call 815-968-0333.
JULY/AUGUST 2013
AATODAY
East to Joshua Tree
From a 2011 Grapevine magazine
"'O-beer-thirty' came every afternoon and I typically didn't taper off
until the wee-wee-hours of the morning."
For the past 20 years (15 drunk, five sober), my workplace has
been the Mojave Desert. Unbelievably, I used to walk around under
a blazing, 115-degree sun, enduring killer hangovers. I spent many
a night in bars, motels, and campsites, always working toward
tomorrow's hangover. I've frequented bars in every town from
Lancaster to Landers, Barstow to Banning, Palmdale to Palm
Springs and from Needles to Neenach ....
In the Mojave, ground temperatures can climb up to 150 degrees,
and if you're not wearing sunglasses, the sun bouncing up off the
reflective white sand can sunburn your corneas. My sandpapered
eyelids were habitually scratching up and down over bloodshot,
alcohol-soaked eyeballs ....
During the day, I harassed employees in the office for failing to
achieve my overachieving work (so-called) ethics. I was shorttempered and directed temper tantrums at employees,
surreptitiously criticizing them for failing to meet unrealistic
standards that fluctuated from high to low because of my cyclical
superiority and inferiority complexes.
In the field, I surrounded myself with drinking buddies who walked
with me all day and drank with me all night. I had home-bars-awayfrom-home in every town, where I'd drink with strangers whom I
confused for friends, sharing my misery with old drunks getting
older by the drink, habitually occupying the same designated
barstools. They'd wave me over and we'd sing along to country
music lyrics celebrating adultery ....
PAGE 3
In working several Fourth Steps with two different sponsors, I've
come to believe that, then and now, I tend to surround myself with
people who provide me with what I need. That used to be drinking
buddies, who provided familiar company and substances. Now, it's
you guys in Alcoholics Anonymous meetings who provide solutions
to problems and demonstrate how to live life on life's terms.
In working my Ninth Step, I apologized to several former employees
and made living amends to three by continuing to employ them
under very different, much improved conditions. I (mostly) keep my
temper and (mostly) allow them to work out their issues amongst
themselves, rather than butting in. Where I used to take advantage
of friends, I now try to engender an advantageous workplace that is
beneficial to us all.
Today, I have a home-away-from-home group in Ridgecrest and a
mobile-home group at the 6:30 p.m. men's stag, "It's a Better
Deal," in Yucca Valley. Twentynine Palms is still a favorite eastern
destination. In fact, I just had a business meeting there the other
day at 10 a.m. I left at 4:45 a.m. and fellowshipped with alcoholics
at the Joshua Tree Fellowship Hall at their daily 7 a.m. Attitude
Adjustment meeting. On my way home at 5:30 p.rn., I made happy
hour at the HUG (Hesperia Umbrella Group). On any given day,
there are dozens of meetings in the 30 miles between Lucerne
Valley and Wrightwood, including Apple Valley, Hesperia, and
Victorville. This is where I've spent some of the happiest hours of
my life.
An antiquated, traditional spiritual says, "I'm using my Bible for a
road map. The Ten Commandments tell me what to do." In truth,
for me these days, "I'm using my meeting schedule for a road map.
The Big Book tells me what to do."
-Ed L.,Wrightwood, Calif
JULY/AUGUST
2013
AUGUST
~C'~~
1: Anderson Japanese Gardens meeting,
5:15 p.m., free admission, 318 Spring
Creek Road, Rockford
~
1: District 70 meeting, 7 p.m., United
AA COMMUNITY CALENDAR
(To submit calendar items, call 815-968-0333)
JULY
11: Anderson Japanese Gardens meeting,
5:15 p.m., free admission, 318 Spring
Creek Road, Rockford
13: SMAACC Poker Meeting Run, sign-up
11:30 a.m. New Attitudes, Rockford; 5
p.m. Freeport Alano Club; 7 p.m. speaker
13: Rockford Area Intergroup board
meeting, 9 a.m., 4040 Charles St.,Suite
201, Rockford (AA public invited)
20: Annual Craft Sale & Rummage Sale,
Alana Club of Rockford, 1210 11th St.,
Rockford. 9 a.m.-4 p.m. 815-227-4633,
alanoclubofrockford.org
28: Annual Intergroup/District 70 Picnic.
Alpine Shelter No.2, Rockford, 11 a.m.
Volleyball, 1 p.m. 815-968-0333
PAGE 4
AATODAY
Methodist Church, 4506 Highcrest Road,
Rockford
10: Rockford Area Intergroup board
meeting, 9 a.m., 4040 Charles St.,Suite
201, Rockford (AA public invited)
23-25: Illinois State AA Conference. Hyatt
Regency Schaumburg. 888-421-1442.
resweb. passkey.corn/ go/: LStateAA
SEPTEMBER
5: Anderson Japanese Gardens meeting,
5:15 p.m., free admission, 318 Spring
Creek Road, Rockford
5: District 70 meeting, 7 p.m., United
Methodist Church, 4506 Highcrest Road,
Rockford
5-8: 8th International
Conference Seniors
in Sobriety, San Diego, 855-713-2300,
sandiegoSIS2013~gmail.com,
aasis2013.org.
201, Rockford (AA public invited)
OCTOBER
3: Anderson Japanese Gardens meeting,
5:15 p.m., free admission, 318 Spring
Creek Road, Rockford
3: District 70 meeting, 7 p.m., United
Methodist Church, 4506 Highcrest Road,
Rockford
5: SOWANI (SOuthern Wisconsin And
Northern Illinois), 5:30 p.m. dinner, 6:30
p.m. speaker, Rockton Community Center,
320 W. Main St.
12: Rockford Area Intergroup board
meeting, 9 a.m., 4040 Charles St.,Suite
201, Rockford (AA public invited)
Note: Flyers for many of these events are
available for printing online at
rockfordAA.org
NEWS & NOTES
Primary Purpose has
moved from Suite 100 to Suite 302 at
810 E. State St., Rockford
New location:
The Belvidere Alana Club,
103 N. State St., has added an 8 p.m.
Sunday meeting.
New meeting:
14: Rockford Area Intergroup board
meeting, 9 a.m., 4040 Charles St.,Suite
JULY/AUGUST 2013
4
~
A.A.
AATODAY
AUGURY
9: James B.
25: Jim G.
HEALTHY
CENTRAL
10: Kelly J.
25: Jim W.
SOLUTIONS
LOVES PARK
10: Kjell L.
GROUP
11: Gary B.
29: Hugh D.
June
19: Todd K.
13: Brian V.
36: JeffW.
1: Todd
13: Harry G.
36: Linda W.
3: Rick W.
MCFARLAND
BEGINNINGS
12: Brad D.
July
June
14: Jay S.
5 Becky M.
4: Greg K.
8: Jerry C. L.
1: Sandy D.
2: Howard L.
7: Bob W.
18: Nancy H.
26: Sue L.
BELVIDERE
ALANO
June
1: Scott A.
18: Bob A.
July
12: Dennis W.
BELVIDERE
TRAVELERS
June
9: Jeanne
M.
July
1: Bob S.
20: Nancy K.
47: Ron E.
June
14: Linda B.
5: Laurie B.
15: Joe M.
June
18: Val S.
AVENUE
25: Curt E.
25: Rita V.
NEW
1: Sheila
5: Chrissy H.
22: Dan T.
1: Ron M.
21: John K_
MUDDY RIVER
6: Mike H.
15: Gregg H.
23: Sheryl P.
4: Bob D.
27: Chris A.
June
July
July
30: Chris J.
5: Laurie B.
27: Nick N.
1: ZigS.
22: Karen R.
3: Christian
7: Harry H.
July
14: Dan S.
24: Tim R.
5th
4: Shirwayne
June
I~'-
22: Greg M.
24: Gary C.
DOWNTOWN
(in years)
40: Linda C.
8: Danielle
9: Gina H.
BIRTHDAYS
22: Rich P.
7: Harry H.
BYRON GROUP
None received
None received
W.
PAGES
S.
July
6: Laurie B.
30: Chris J.
14: Don H.
1: Kevin S.
8: Patti B.
31: David L.
30: Roger D.
OVER FIFTIES
23: Janet C.
23: Pat L.
2: Chris T.
15: Joe M.
38: Bill C.
July
June
2: Donna
18: Rob T.
25: Nancy J.
2: Gary D.
32: Kevin H.
July
1: Amanda
..J.-'-
2: Sharon
R.
L.
1: Karen B.
30: Chrls J.
2: Sharon
34: Bud L.
R.
3: Jerry H.
July
2: Ben O.
EASTSIDE
3: Adam H.
1: Linda M.
2: Steven B.
4: Neil C.
PRIMARY
H.O.W.
4: Joe D.
3: Bruce M.
25: Harry N.
PURPOSE
3: Russ T.
June
4: Larry K.
1: Lori D.
3: Portia A.
1: AlexS.
4: MarkS.
13: Jodi S.
3: Terry T.
June
NEW
1: Kellie R.
ATTITUDES
3: Steven M.
1: Leon W.
4: Pam P.
16: Pat P.
4: Dana L.
1: Heather V.
5: Adam M.
16: Yale E.
5: Fred B.
June
7: Rosie L.
1: Jacob E.
5: Becky M.
28:J.D.
6: Mike A.
1: Jacob E.
9: Duane J.
1: Tommy D.
5: Jami W.
10: Jeanine S.
2: Sara S.
15: Joe M.
2: AmberW.
5: Linnie H.
5 O'CLOCK
15: Jim B.
6: Gail N.
38: Keith H.
2: Bridget H.
6: Jennifer
SHADOW
18: Penny H.
16: Pete A.
July
C.
2: Craig L.
8: Chris B.
JUNE
18: Sandy W.
July
2: Denzil W.
2: Kris B.
8: Sarah A.
15: Lac
19: Deb O.
3: Alex
6:Jim
2: Rich D.
14: Rich P.
29: Steve C.
22: Greg M.
3: Betty Lou
3: Mike L.
14: Ted C.
36: Sandy H.
!:i: Bob M.
PECATONICA
C.
4: Chuck T.
16: Maryann
JULY
23: Jeff
23: Pat L.
6: Jimmy C.
July
5: John C.
20: Maggie D.
1: Bobbi Jo B.
26: Pat F.
6: Mike A.
24: Tom F.
5: Steve P.
20: Nancy K.
1: Don D.
33: Stan V.
7: Glenn Y.
7: Dan S.
21: Wendy G.
1: Kenny R.
33: Eleanor M.
9: Cindy S.
Continued
8: Jeffrey M.
22: Greg M.
2: Dennis E.
35: Brent B.
11: Donna Mc.
Page 6
B.
--~-----
on
-...,
JULY/AUGUST 2013
A.A.
BIRTHDAYS
Continued from Page 5
ROSCOE RECOVERY
June
3: Jerry H.
July
1: Frank S.
2: Cheri T.
11: Lara K.
UPPER ROOM
June
1: Theresa K.
4: John McE.
4: Laurie McE.
4: Sue H.
7: Sherryl N.
July
2: Babbie R.
2: Cathy T.
3: Alex A.
4: Julie O'M
4: Neil C.
6: Jennifer B.
9: Arlene S.
18: Jamie Terra H.
23: Mo C.
Are your group's
birthdays missing?
If your group's
birthdays are not on
the list, contact your
group chairman or
intergroup rep.
AATODAY
Meetings
Continued from Page 1
• Stay on topic: Try to talk about the topic so there is a
common theme to the meeting.
• Welcome newcomers: Explain briefly to the newcomer
how meeting works and how the Lord's Prayer ends
meetings. Get them a meeting schedule.
• See sponsor at meeting: Attend meetings that your
sponsor attends. Sometimes it is easier to talk to a
sponsor face to face than over a phone. Have a oneon-one session with him/her every week.
• Have a topic: If chairing a meeting, be prepared and
have a topic ready if no one has one.
• Wait, wait: When asking for a topic, wait at least a
minute before coming up with one. And, when asking
for a moment of silence, give it more than one second.
• Leave the newcomers (of opposite sex) alone: They need
to feel this is a safe place, and the last thing they need
is being hit on.
• Be courteous and respectful of others: Consider the
audience when using profanity or raising otherwise
sensitive topics that are best left to private discussions
with your sponsor.
DON'T:
• Leave phone alone: Don't text or use your cellphone
during meetings.
• No 'preaching': Do not tell fellow AAs what they
"should do". Share how it works from personal
experience. Share your experience, strength and hope.
• No early signing: Don't sign court papers until after the
meeting.
• Your time only: Don't talk too long, depriving other
people the opportunity to share. Most people naturally
PAGE 6
will quit listening to you after a few minutes. A
longtime member once suggested that a person do
the math before speaking -- divide the time
remaining in the meeting by the number of people
yet to speak; the answer is how much time you can
speak.
• Quiet: Don't talk to the person next to you while
someone is talking. Don't talk to others while "How
It Works" is being read -- they might need to listen
to what it says.
• No venting: Do not vent about "your day". It takes
up time, doesn't help anyone. Some things need to
be shared with a sponsor before bringing it up in a
meeting. Not everything is meeting material.
• AA-approved only: Don't read from unapproved
literature.
• No pets: Do not bring pets to meetings.
• OK to pass: Don't share if you don't have anything
besides opinions to share, or must spend your time
"commenting on someone else's comments". It is
OK to "pass" once in a while.
• Expand AA routine, fellowship: Don't limit yourself to
the same meetings week after week and year after
year. Continue to widen your circle of AA friends
and acquaintances; attend at least one AA
conference a year. Get out of your comfort zone
and do service work and new meetings.
Thanks to Patti S., Jo S., Jack P., Jim J., Jim B.,
Linda W. and Tim J. for their contributions.
Got others?: You can submit other suggestions to
the lists by email atRQQkfordareaA~g?:!gmail.com. If
we get enough, we might do another list later.
L
JULY/AUGUST 2013
MTODAY
IF NOT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD ...
(Real headlines for news stories across the U.S. in May/June,2013)
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Grandma convicted of 7th DUI after picking 1-year-old up from day care
Woman charged with DUI after drunken horse ride
Scott E. McKenzie Arrested For DUI On A Lawnmower
Limo driver, charged with DUI, drove teens to Oswego East prom
Man gets 12 years for DUI that ended in chase, crash in W. Dundee
Bicyclist killed in DUI accident
Missoula woman charged with 4th DUI after police car sideswiped
Driver faces DUI charge after train nearly hits car
Teen charged with DUI in crash that killed brother
Bears' Rodriguez apologizes for DUI arrest
Chicago Tribune political reporter charged with DUI in Springfield
Carpentersville man sentenced to eight years for ninth DUI
SUV driver charged with DUI after fatal DuPage crash
Roswell mom accused of DUI with child in car
Announcer AI Michaels Busted for Alleged DUI
Woman charged with DUI after crash injures girl
.3 Doors Down bassist has DUI case pending in D'Iberville
• Elgin man faces prison after 9th DUI arrest
• Principal Arrested For DUI, Slips Out of Handcuffs in Police Video
• Mom who pushed DUI bill, cited for DUI
• Sycamore man charged with DUI in crash that killed boy
• Mass. bishop pleads not guilty to DUI charge in RI
• Barbara Walters' daughter arrested for DUI
(To read these stories online, use Googie.com and search for the headline)
PAGES
They Died Sober
• Shirwayne S., Downtown, 4 years, May
2013
• George B., Downtown/Pecatonica,
years, May 2013
18
• Mike 0., New Attitudes, 15 years, May
2013
• Lynn B., Healthy Solutions/New
11 years, June 2013
Attitudes,
Note: To submit the name of an AA member
who died sober in the past six months, email
information to [email protected].
Faithful Fivers
Help payforthe printing cost of the
newsletter and other Rockford Area
Intergroup expenses by enrolling in the
Faithful Fiver program. By pledging at least
$5 a month, you will provide much-needed
financial help. You will get a copy of each
newsletter in the mail or by email. Call 815968-0333 for information.