2006/09/27

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...jackasses since 1906
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VOLUME
100, ISSUE 16 • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
Poster sale wreaks havoc in UCC
Jon Purdy/Gazette
IMAGINE THIS: A UCC ATRIUM THAT WASN’T FILLED WITH ANNOYING POSTER DISPLAYS. The Imaginus poster sale has its cons. Want to stick it to the man? Come
to the Gazette office (UCC Room 263) and buy a delightful campus poster for just $5.75!
Mitchell: Engineers Without New university offers
all-online degree
Borders creating social
change and leaders
By Amy Leitner
Gazette Staff
By Ravi Amarnath
Gazette Staff
Parker Mitchell, co-founder and
co-chief executive officer of Engineers Without Borders, met with
Western’s chapter members and
engineering faculty on campus yesterday.
Mitchell and fellow EWB cofounder George Roter are on a
month long tour of the organization’s 30 Canadian chapters.
“For both myself and George, it’s
absolutely critical to reach out and
be supportive of what [our chapters] are doing,” Mitchell said.
The organization was founded
in 2000 to contribute to the United
Nations Millennium Development
Goals. Today EWB has 15,000 student members, eight full-time
members, a board of directors, and
has sent 160 volunteers overseas on
development projects.
Mitchell attributes the organization’s success to its broad appeal
among student leaders.
“Our organization is not just for
engineers,” he said. “We are able to
attract people who are committed
to making social change and help
them grow into leaders.”
Over the past six years, EWB has
evolved into Canada’s fastest growing international development
organization. As the initiative has
grown, so has EWB recognition
abroad.
“Before we were approaching
organizations abroad, and now we
are at the stage where people are
approaching us and asking us for
volunteers,” Mitchell said. “We also
now have two full-time staff in
southern and western Africa who
evaluate different projects.”
In addition to EWB’s international activities, they have also
started taking on initiatives within
Canada through their high school
and public outreach programs.
“We realized that if we are going
to have a broad social conscience
where people don’t accept the
Engineers Without Borders
founder Parker Mitchell
social inequalities we have, we
need to have young people who
understand the plight of those who
suffer abroad, and children and
young adults are the most empathetic to that.”
Prior to co-founding EWB,
Mitchell worked as a business analyst with the management consulting firm McKinsey & Company.
Although he now works in the nonprofit sector, Mitchell still incorporates numerous skills he learned in
the private sector into EWB.
“I think one of the things the
non-profit sector could learn from
the private sector are the benefits
of efficiency and focus. There are
certainly some non-profit organizations that are focused, and others that aren’t because they try to
please multiple constituencies.
“When they try to please too
many groups, sometimes they
compromise, and compromise
doesn’t always work out,” Mitchell
said. “What we’ve learned from the
private sector is that we’re just
going to focus on development. We
want to do one thing and do it really well.”
For creating EWB, Mitchell and
Roter were acknowledged in 2005
as two of “Canada’s top 40 under
40” in a program managed by the
Caldwell Partners. Neither partner
has hit 30 yet.
Mitchell credits the organization’s success to the volunteers who
run the various chapters.
“They have got great social
causes, but they also get things
done. As long as we keep attracting
good people, the sky is the limit for
us.”
Ten years ago, completing a university degree online might have
seemed “virtually” impossible.
Now it’s a reality.
Canadian Virtual University is a
consortium of universities offering
distance studies and online courses. Courses are available in most
disciplines, including humanities,
social sciences, and business. The
university offers students full
degrees, and credits transfer easily
throughout Canadian universities.
Vicki Busch, executive director
of CVU, said the university offers
2,000 online and distance undergraduate courses.
“People often go on to continue
with graduate school and get masters degrees as well as PhD’s,”
Busch said. “Last year alone,
100,000 people enrolled in CVU
courses.”
Upon completion of their program, students earn a degree, certificate or diploma from one of
CVU’s partner universities, which is
considered the student’s “home
university.” This practice ensures
degrees earned through CVU will
be recognized by employers and
institutions around the world.
The university was established
in 2000 with assistance from the
Canadian government to give
learners greater course selection
and to give universities opportunities to collaborate in areas of common interest. CVU has since
expanded to include 12 institutions.
CVU doesn’t charge any additional fees for its services. All courses cost the same as they would if
taken directly through the individual institution. At Western, halfyear courses cost roughly $500, and
full-year courses about $1,000.
Universities participating in
CVU include Laurentian University, Nipissing University, the University of Manitoba, and the University of New Brunswick.
Cape Breton University in Sydney, Nova Scotia, is another of the
dozen universities partnered with
Canadian Virtual University.
The majority of Cape Breton’s
CVU students are adult learners.
Susan Carlin, program director of
distance education at Cape Breton
University, said many adults jump
at the chance to learn at their own
pace.
Western is not currently affiliated with CVU. However, Western
does offer 97 online courses and
some can be combined with an
undergraduate degree.
Kim Holland, co-ordinator of
distance studies at Western, said
some modules can be completed
via distance studies, but a full
degree can’t be earned through
online courses only.
“Distance studies is certainly
not for everyone,” Holland said,
adding some people need help outside the classroom, more contact
with professors, and tutoring.
P2 ➤ news
theGazette • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
A bloody good time!
Andrew Mastronardi/Gazette
HEALTH SERVICES ARE NOTHING BUT A BUNCH OF BLOODSUCKERS. Yesterday, Western student
Geoff MacGregor stopped by Health Services and donated blood.
Experts predict mild winter
By Jennifer Davidson
Gazette Staff
Environment Canada is predicting this winter will be milder than
normal.
David Phillips, senior climatologist at Environment Canada,
said Environment Canada typically issues a seasonal outlook for
winter Dec. 1, but they do issue
preliminary forecasts. At the
moment, signs are pointing to
milder than usual temperatures.
Phillips said the prediction
doesn’t mean every day will be
mild.
“It simply means that when
Environment Canada does the
number crunching at the end of
February, the averages will likely
be warmer than usual.”
Phillips added it’s hard to pinpoint what this means for a particular region.
“There will be moments in
London when it’s cold and snowing and people will wonder what
we meant by [warmer than
usual],” he said.
“Milder than normal temperatures may be the difference
between —5 C weather from the
south, or —15 C from the north.
Pacific winds as opposed to Arctic
winds may mean more snow for
London due to the lake effect.”
Phillips said there are no guarantees, but if the El Nino effect —
pools of warm water on the Pacific — plays out this year, winter
will likely be milder.
According to Jim Galbraith,
supervisor of grounds and maintenance services at Western,
Physical Plant is already gearing
up for winter.
“We’re starting to renew contracts and getting quotes for
winter materials like salt,” he
said.
Starting Dec. 1, Western will
employ several on-call contractors to plow parking lots, roads
and sidewalks.
“It’s different when it snows,
then we have about 30 people
working on snow removal and
salting,” Galbraith said. “Normally we have about 13 people on
regular staff. During the week, we
aim to have the streets plowed by
6:30 a.m.”
With air restrictions eased,
students can travel freely
Thanksgiving travel good to go
By Jennifer Davidson
Gazette Staff
The absolute ban on liquids at
airports has been lifted and
replaced with lighter restrictions.
The change comes just in time for
students travelling by plane this
Thanksgiving.
The new restrictions allow toiletries back in carry-on bags as
long as they are in containers less
than 90 millilitres, and they must
be carried in a one-litre, clear,
resealable bag. These items
should be placed on a tray separate from the rest of the carry-on
luggage to minimize delay during
the screening process.
According to Transport Canada, the change occurred because
travel-sized liquids, gels and
aerosols aren’t viewed as security
threats.
Baby formula and milk are
permitted for children under two
years old, as well as prescription
medicine or essential non-prescription medicine with supporting documentation.
Liquids, gels and aerosols sold
by retailers within the airport’s
sterile areas are now allowed on
board.
“What this does is allow a
small quantity of liquids past the
screening point,” said Jim Facette,
president and CEO of the Canadian Airports Council.
“You’ll be able to take those
products on domestic and international flights, and now to the
U.S. as well. You can purchase a
cup of coffee in the sterile area
and take it onto the flight now
that the Transportation Security
Authority in the U.S. has
approved it.”
Mike Seabrook, vice-president
of the London International Airport, said Thanksgiving, along
with Christmas and Conference
Week, results in a significant
increase in students travelling. He
expects this Thanksgiving to be
the same despite the restrictions.
“The rules and regulations
have been well publicized,” said
Seabrook. “People are listening
and coming prepared so the
numbers of passengers going
through the airport have not really been affected,” said Seabrook.
“People understand that these
[regulations] are in place for their
security and that they are necessary. Plus, there is now room for
Correction
Yesterday, The Gazette attributed a quote to Irene Matheson,
an MPP for Middlesex. The quotes were from Irene Mathyssen,
MP for London-Fanshawe.
toothpaste and hair gel, so I don’t
anticipate any problems.”
Mike Khoury, a third-year
medical science student planning
to fly home for Thanksgiving, said
he’s glad the ban was lifted.
Though he believed the ban was a
pain, he felt the new restrictions
are reasonable. He said it’s good
airports take precautions.
“I travel from London to Montreal about four times a year, plus
around the country, and I don’t
feel worried,” Khoury said. “Especially within Canada, I don’t find
[travelling] scary.
I’m more worried about crashing than a terrorist attack. I think
the scariest thing is the Dash-8
planes they use between London
and Toronto.”
3-day forecast
Thursday
Friday
Saturday
Cloudy with
Showers
High 15C • Low 11C
Variable Cloudiness
High 14C
Low 10C
Cloudy with
Showers
High 16C • Low 10C
Weather
news ➤ P3
theGazette • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
Study: higher IQ
scores equal
lighter hangovers
By Dave Ward
Gazette Staff
A new study suggests higher IQ
might not only earn a person higher grades, but also prevent rough
mornings after the bar.
A new study in the Journal of
Epidemiology and Community
Health, has shown a link between
higher IQ levels and lower incidences of hangovers.
“We studied around 5,000 11year-old children who had their
IQ’s assessed in the 1960s,” said Dr.
G. David Batty, lead researcher on
the study and based out of the
Medical Research Council’s Social
and Public Health Science Unit in
Glasgow, Scotland.
“In middle age, we mailed them
a questionnaire about their drinking habits and other health issues.
We found that both boys and girls
with high IQ scores were much less
likely to report hangovers in middle-age, suggesting they were
drinking less heavily,”
“More intelligent people are
presumably more likely to understand the health risks of binge
drinking,” said James Olson, a psychology professor at Western.
Olson added greater reasoning
skills, often associated with higher
scores on IQ-style testing, increases one’s ability to see the relations
News Briefs
Western research receives
financial boost
investment is that it puts funding
into the intangible needs of the network,” said Michael Bauer, associate director of SHARCNET.
“Previous investments have
brought [SHARCNET] new hardware and tech support, but this
investment will bring funding for
administrative staff, training, outreach programs, and other projects
not covered by previous funding.”
—Mike Hayes
Wanted: exceptional
graduates
Western is looking for its best and
most interesting soon-to-be grads.
Each year, Western’s Department of Communications and
Public Affairs tells the stories of several interesting graduates who have
either excelled in their university
careers or have taken a unique path
toward convocation.
If you know a student graduating at fall convocation who has an
interesting story to tell, be it
humourous, enlightening or inspir-
Andrew Mastronardi/Gazette
CAUTION: NERDS STUDYING EVEN THOUGH IT’S SEPTEMBER. Also give caution to the renovations
currently taking place at D.B. Weldon Library.
Weldon undergoing makeover
By Stephanie Dunlop
Gazette Staff
Western’s D.B. Weldon library is getting a makeover.
“We’re getting a new desk that
will be a shared service desk that
will bring together reference and
circulation,”
said
Catherine
Wilkins, director of the D.B. Weldon
Library.
The library is also receiving
brand new study desks.
“We’re doing renovations of the
study desk upstairs,” Wilkins said.
“We’ve brought in new study desks
and chairs and new paint.”
Renovations were scheduled to
be completed by the beginning of
October. Unfortunately, students
will have to deal with the construc-
ing, Western wants to know about
it.
Send the grad’s contact information via e-mail to [email protected]. Include some information about the person and a
local phone number where the student can be reached. The submission deadline is Oct. 2.
—Chris Taplin
tion a bit longer.
“Our expectation was that it
would be done by the first of October,” Wilkins said. “It looks like it
will be close to but not quite [finished by Oct. 1]. It’s hard to tell
because it involves many trades.”
Most students, however, aren’t
bothered by the renovations.
“I didn’t really notice [the renovations],” said Arthur Kwok, a second-year medical science student.
“I know there used to be a desk
there. It’s an eyesore, but it’s nothing too bad.”
Weldon has also shortened its
hours. The library is now open
from 8 a.m. to 11:30 p.m. Monday to Thursday, 8 a.m. to 9 p.m.
on Friday, 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. on
Saturdays, and 11 a.m. to 11:30
p.m. on Sundays.
“It’s because we found students
don’t come in great numbers to use
the facilities on Friday or Saturday
nights, but they certainly do on
Sunday,” Wilkins said.
University Students’ Council
President Fab Dolan assured
extended hours during exam periods will not be affected.
“In terms of the USC, it’s important for us to see more hours for
students to study. I think it’s important that students have access to
the library and there will still be
extended hours during peak periods and exams.
“I think it’s a question of funding and this is something that
needs to be addressed in the
future.”
ALPHA PHI
The sisters of Alpha Phi are holding a
meet & greet
for all women interested in sorority life!
Join us on Friday September 29
from 5:30 - 7:30 pm at The Wave
For more info, please contact:
Antoinette Afriyie at 519-933-9302 or [email protected]
100.16.C.01
Western, along with 15 other institutions, is receiving $10.9-million
for investment into a groundbreaking supercomputing project.
The Shared Hierarchical Academic Research Computing Network
(SHARCNET), created in June 2001
by a consortium of researchers, is a
network of computers devoted to
assisting research in Ontario. The
network, made up of high-performance computing (HPC) facilities,
is thousands of times faster than
traditional desktop computers.
Programs normally taking months
for a researcher to run can be
accomplished within hours using
SHARCNET.
The investment support 1,200
researchers across the province
and is part of a $550-million project
designed to create jobs and stimulate Ontario’s economy.
“The key component of this
between things.
“Advice about drinking can be
complex — we are told that certain
levels of drinking and certain types
of beverages are bad for you, while
others may be okay,” Batty said. “It
might be that these messages
should be simplified for everyone.”
Batty noted previous studies
had shown children with high IQ
scores were less likely to engage in
other unhealthy behaviours in
adulthood, like smoking.
Olson agreed previous data
showed links between various IQ
tests and longevity.
It’s a plausible conclusion,
according to Olson, for higher IQ
scores to be related to increased
longevity.
“[More intelligent] people are
better able to understand health
risks and to avoid them,” Olson
said.
“I think smart people drink a lot
— they just drink more responsibly,” said Katina Matheso, a second-year criminology student.
“They might not get wasted every
time they drink.”
“I consider myself a smart guy
and I like to go out,” said Mark
Fania, a second-year social work
student. “There’s a time to study,
and there’s a time to party. There’s
a distinction.”
P4 ➤ opinions
theGazette • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
theGazette
Volume 100, Issue 16
“Those who thrive on the social aspects of the
classroom might find online learning a challenge.”
—CINDY YAGER
Ian Van Den Hurk
Anna Coutts
Matt Larkin
Editor-In-Chief
Deputy Editor
Managing Editor
Editor - [email protected]
Deputy - [email protected]
Managing - [email protected]
website at www.gazette.uwo.ca
University Community Centre Rm. 263
The University of Western Ontario
London, Ontario, CANADA. N6A 3K7
Editorial Offices: (519) 661-3580, Fax: (519) 661-3825
Advertising Dept.: (519) 661-3579, Fax: (519) 661-3960
The Gazette is owned and published by the University Students’ Council.
Virtual U still a
young concept
Imagine a world where you can earn your university
degree without listening to professors, sitting through
lectures, interacting with classmates, or even leaving
your home. With the creation of Canada’s Virtual University, this world now exists.
Canadian Virtual University is a conglomeration of
12 Canadian universities offering students the opportunity to complete their full degrees online.
So far, the schools partaking in this virtual concept
include Acadia University, Cape Breton University, the
University of New Brunswick and Laurentian University. At Western, students can take some, but not all, their
courses online.
The creation of an online university raises two conflicting viewpoints. On one hand, an online degree is an
interesting alternative for people unable to attend class
regularly due to life demands.
On the other hand, completing a degree online may
put students at a disadvantage, as they can’t learn the
social skills or network the same way most students
can. As well, degrees earned online may be considered
inferior by employers and other universities.
The majority of students currently enrolled in CVU
are mature adults. The online program lets them work
full-time jobs and care for children while still earning a
university degree. Inferior or not, CVU provides these
people with an accessible way to earn a degree.
CVU may also be a good alternative for students who
feel they work better in a solitary environment and
learn more teaching themselves course material than
they do from professors’ lectures.
However, a good portion of one’s university education comes not from course content, but from the faceto-face interaction and debate only the in-class experience can provide. Discussion amongst students and
professors is an integral part of the university experience. By studying only online, students may not achieve
the necessary interpersonal life skills needed to survive
in the “real world.”
It’s not likely this virtual university concept will effect
class attendance or student enrolment. CVU should, at
the least, be viewed as an alternative education option.
After all, students learning online won’t learn any less
than students who never attend class and just show up
for exams.
It may be years before an online degree is considered
equivalent to an in-class degree. CVU may never be
considered equal. However, it deserves the chance to
prove its worth.
In 10 years, who knows where technology will be?
Video conferencing and message boards may become
popular teaching methods. As with any new venture,
only time will tell if CVU is worthwhile.
Less cash, gets there fast: take the bus!
Coutts like
a knife
Anna Coutts
Deputy Editor
Via Rail or Greyhound?
For me, there is no grey area about
which is better. Greyhound wins, hands
down.
For any cash-strapped, car-less students frequently travelling between London and Toronto, Greyhound is by far the
best bet.
No, I don’t work for Greyhound. And
yes, I’m aware the train has comfier seats
and a snack and beverage service. I’m
still a Greyhound advocate. Not only is it
cheaper, it’s more convenient.
A round-trip Greyhound student ticket to Toronto costs a mere $52.90 — tax
Western
hypocritical
about
rankings
To the Editor:
I recently wrote to The Gazette highlighting the hypocrisy of Western’s administration: it is opposed to being evaluated
and ranked by Maclean’s but they have
no problem evaluating and ranking students. Well, the hypocrisy just got better!
Last week, I picked up a copy of Western News. Toward the back, there were
two graphs under the title “How Western
Measures Up.” The graphs depicted the
proportion of first-year students at Western coming from out-of-province and
out-of-country and compares Western’s
statistics with the average of all Ontario
universities.
This past Monday, “How Western
Measures Up” appeared again in the
Editorials appearing under the ‘opinions’ heading are
decided upon by a majority of the editorial board and
are written by a member of the editorial board but are
not necessarily the expressed opinion of each editorial
board member. All other opinions are strictly those of
the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions
of the USC, The Gazette, its editors or staff.
Section Editors 2006-2007
Letters: Must include the contributor’s name, identification (ie. Economics II, Dean of Arts) and a telephone
number, and be typed double-spaced, submitted on
disk in Macintosh or IBM word-processing format, or
be emailed to [email protected]. Letters more
than 300 words or judged by the Editor-In-Chief to be
libellous, sexist or racist will not be published. The
Gazette reserves the right to edit letters and submissions and makes no guarantees that a letter will be published.
Associate Editor
Ravi Amarnath
• Please recycle this newspaper •
News
Jen Davidson
Cigdem Iltan
Claire Neary
Dave Ward
Sports
Malcolm Aboud
James Hayes
Stephanie Ramsay
Campus Life
Allison Buchan-Terrell
Sarvenaz Kermanshahi
included. The discount applies to anyone with a student card. Via Rail, on the
other hand, requires students to purchase an International Student Idenity
Card ($16) to receive a discount, and
even then a round-trip to Toronto costs
$66.
Some may argue you get more for
your money, but I disagree. Sure, Via
offers more perks than Greyhound. But
for the cash-strapped student, is this
really worth the extra cash? After all, you
can always bring a snack instead of paying for overpriced, less-than-fresh food.
And the seats aren’t that much more
comfortable.
Besides, Greyhound is still more convenient. You can catch the bus from
campus and save yourself a cab ride
downtown, not to mention you won’t
have to worry about Greyhound selling
out seats. Unlike Via Rail, Greyhound has
no seating limit; if a bus fills up, out
comes another one. If the train fills
up...well, sucks to be you.
Greyhound also leaves more often
and later at night than the train. It’s more
flexible too; if you miss your intended
bus, you can use your ticket later.
Refunding train tickets, however, can be
a long, irrititating process.
Though the train is supposedly the
faster ride, regular train riders know it’s
never on time.
If you catch an express bus to Toronto, you’ll be downtown in two hours and
you won’t have to deal with annoying
stops, loud whistles or floods of people
getting on and off.
Understandably, the train is probably
better for students living several hours
away, but for students heading to Toronto, Hamilton, or even Windsor, take the
Greyhound; it’s by far your best bet.
Western News. This time, it showed first
and second-year retention rates and
overall graduation rates and compared
Western to only a few large Canadian
universities and U.S. schools.
These are the same measures
Maclean’s has used for over a decade to
construct its annual rankings! The only
difference is Maclean’s compares all
Canadian universities — not just a
selected few — and, based on these
comparisons, ranks each school.
How can Western withdraw from the
Maclean’s rankings based on questionable methodology, then publish practically the same data in its own newspaper?
Obviously, Western doesn’t have a
problem with the data Maclean’s uses for
its rankings; it just has a problem comparing them with those of other universities.
The Maclean’s rankings will live on, so
university administrations should stop
whining about how they don’t think their
grades are determined fairly and just
start striving to do better.
Otherwise, next time you get a low
grade on an assignment, just claim
you’re opposed to how it was graded.
After all, if more emphasis was given to
the sections you did well on, your mark
would’ve been higher!
Have your classmates sign a letter
outlining why you feel your grade is
merely an arbitrary number and give
that letter to your professor, explaining
why you won’t submit your assignments
to him voluntarily. If he wants it, he can
a submit a Freedom of Information
request!
—Jason Brown
MSc. Biology
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Gazette Staff 2006-2007
Graphics
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P5 WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
STAY TUNED: We’re keen on Moneen... Thursday
ArtsEntertainment
I HOPE HE STAYS AWAY FROM MY CIGARETTE. Johnny Knoxville braces for a yak attack in Jackass Number Two. The movie provides fans with an hour and a half of mindless entertainment.
Knoxville proves he really is a Jackass
Jackass Number Two offers death-defying stunts and several snake attacks
Jackass Number Two
Directed by: Jeff Tremaine
Starring: Johnny Knoxville, Bam
Margera, Steve-O, Chris Pontius,
Jason “WeeMan” Acuna, Preston
Lacy and Ryan Dunn
By Michael Gregoris
Gazette Staff
They’re back and raunchier than
ever.
Johnny Knoxville and the Jackass crew make their triumphant
return to the big screen in the cleverly titled Jackass Number Two. If
ever there were a film to drive the
boundaries of obscenity and lunacy to realms previously thought
unimaginable, this is it.
Like the original, Jackass Number Two is an hour and a half montage of reckless stunts guaranteed
to leave you laughing uncontrollably or seething with disgust.
Viewers should expect all
scenes to end with someone vomiting and beware that full frontal
nudity is the rule, not the exception. One scene features nothing
more than a guy defecating on a
dollhouse toilet. Ha. Ha.
Jackass Number Two recycles its
classic formula of death-defying
stunts and vulgar humour. In par-
ticular, a scene in which Steve-O
gallivants in the waters near the
Gulf of Mexico with a massive hook
protruding from the side of his
cheek exemplifies the film’s ridiculous nature. Did I mention he’s
almost killed by a hammerhead
shark?
Steve-O isn’t the only member
to have a brush with death. Johnny
Knoxville rides a rocket that blows
open seconds before launch time,
leaving a gaping hole just inches
from his upper torso, while skateboarder Bam Margera has close
encounters of the cobra-kind.
One of the film’s most significant stunts involves Chris Pontius’
“mouse” and a tank containing a
viper.
Pontius’ “mouse” is thrust
repeatedly through a hole in order
to entice the snake. Inevitably, his
“mouse” is viciously attacked in the
most painful manner, leaving the
audience wondering what the hell
Chris has been smoking.
If you have a phobia of snakes
or horse semen, exercise extreme
caution when viewing this film, as
there are numerous stunts depicting cast members being bitten
repeatedly and swashing down
semen.
Some may argue Jackass is
nothing more than a bunch of tal-
entless idiots performing random,
tasteless acts to earn a few cheap
laughs.
Upon seeing Jackass Number
Two, these nay-sayers may be
compelled to change their tune.
The sheer courage needed to perform these ludicrous stunts is
peculiarly admirable and deserves
recognition. Apparently you can be
both brave and stupid.
Although it’s immature, obvious, and at times extremely nauseating, Jackass Number Two
achieves what few box-office films
did this year: it provides sheer
entertainment.
Johnny Knoxville, we salute you.
Get the dirt on Sluttyiena and
Maniston on celeb gossip blogs
By Brandon Miller
Gazette Writer
Anna Coutts/Gazette
IF ONLY I COULD HAVE A DEMEANING NICKNAME LIKE THAT SLUT SIENNA. Perez
and Pink supply online readers with gossip, tearing ruthlessly into the celebrities
we all love to hate.
University students spend countless hours
fretting about readings, tests and essays.
Many students have added pressures, especially at a school like Western where clubs
abound and the Greek scene thrives.
To avoid stressing out, sometimes it’s nice
to indulge in frivolous, superficial fun and
thoughtless pleasure. The latest trend in
mindless fun is reading celebrity gossip websites.
These amateur blogs are filled with the
latest pictures, news and multimedia outlining the whereabouts of the world’s most
loved — and loathed — celebrities.
Pink
is
the
New
Blog
(www.trent.blogspot.com) tops the list for
current updates on Lindsay Lohan, Paris
Hilton and the Olsen twins. Run by Trent, a
quick-witted, charmingly flamboyant celeb
follower, Pink uses vibrant writing to praise,
insult and mock the hottest celebrities as
they exercise, get airbrushed on magazine
covers, and go through transformations from
gross to glam, then back (that’s aimed at you,
Britney).
Pink is the go-to place for the newest pictures of a shirtless Jake Gyllenhaal, a sloppy
Tara Reid, and constant updates on Suri
Cruise, Tom and Katie’s mysterious love
child.
Trent usually targets Kimberly Stewart or
Posh Spice, but he’s also created countless
love-hate relationships with numerous
celebrities, ranging from Ashlee Simpson to
Nicole Richie. If you crave sizzling updates
on Lance Bass and Reichen Lehmkuhl, Adam
Brody and Rachel Bilson, Gwen Stefani and
Gavin Rossdale, or Brangelina, Pink is the
place to get your fix.
Perez Hilton (www.perezhilton.com) is
run by Mario, another star magnet. He uses
PLEASE SEE CELEBRITY BLOGS P9
P6 ➤ arts&entertainment
theGazette • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
I AM NOT A CROOK. Sean Penn plays a crooked politician in All The King’s Men alongside an all-star cast including Anthony Hopkins, Jude Law and Kate Winslet.
All The King’s Men fails despite royal cast
The movie with the most potential last weekend still a flop
All the King’s Men
Directed by: Steve Zaillian
Starring: Sean Penn, Jude Law,
Anthony Hopkins
By Andrew Sullivan
Gazette Staff
With a film like All The King’s Men,
you expect threats and bribes to be
thrown around like poisoned rice
at a wedding. Unfortunately, what
you get is a limp love story, bad
Southern accents, ramshackle
voice-overs and paper-thin plot
devices.
Based on the Pulitzer Prizewinning novel by Robert Penn
Warren and a remake of the
award-winning 1949 movie, the
film chronicles the rise and fall of
Willie Stark (Sean Penn), a man
whose socialist ideals are crushed
by the power he gains as governor
of Louisiana.
At least this is what the audience is led to believe. Although it’s
a basic corruption story, the audience is left scratching its head
throughout most of the film, trying
to comprehend its bizarre structure and Penn’s overbearing performance, which threatens to
forcibly shove everyone else off
screen.
Jude Law plays Jack Burden, a
reporter and son of an upper-class
family who becomes caught up in
Stark’s campaign. His narration is
meant to make sense of the storyline, but the randomly strewn
voice-overs only serve as distraction.
of nostalgia and longing, all he
achieves are bland glimpses into
Burden’s childhood.
Of course, these characters
eventually come back to haunt
Burden and Stark in the end, but
by that point who really cares?
By trying to explain Burden’s
past, the film loses track of its initial focus, Willie Stark. It seems
while the director was away, Penn
transformed the initially interesting role into a blown up caricature.
With random showgirls, whisky
flasks and other excesses following
Stark wherever he goes, his corrupted nature couldn’t be any
more apparent. It’s too bad the
film fails to explain this rapid
change in character or to show any
of Stark’s supposed “strong arm”
tactics.
Apparently, the director was too
busy bulking up his script with
random tangents to form a coherent plot. In the end, all Zaillian
achieves is a monotonous pace
that puts the audience to sleep.
Why bother caring about characters if you don’t understand them?
All The King’s Men could have
been a telling tale of power’s corrupting nature. It could have
delved deep into Stark’s role as
governor and Burden’s strange
relationship with his godfather. It
could have tossed away the lovestory and shown the dirty underbelly of Stark’s actions.
Even with an all-star cast, prizewinning source material and piles
of money, Zaillian still can’t put All
The King’s Men back together
again.
Steps to Richmond Row with all the amenities!
VARSITY
COMMONS
my style my way
To thicken the plot, the audience is dragged through a plodding exploration of Burden’s past
which ultimately leads nowhere.
Characters are one-dimensional
fragments in flashbacks, called
forth only to serve as props for
Penn to bellow at.
Featuring all-star actors Anthony Hopkins, James Gandolfini and
Kate Winslet, the cast can’t be fully
blamed for the film’s failure. The
script jumps from place to place
without explanation.
Burden’s childhood friends
(Winslet and Mark Ruffalo) pop up
from time to time, but their purpose is never really explained.
Beach scenes and teenage reminiscences lead to dead ends.
Although writer and director
Steve Zaillian tries to create an air
PLUS…
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100.16.C.03
CALL us for a Tour at 75 Ann St. 519-858-2525
theGazette • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
advertisement ➤ P7
You can be a Rogers VIP to see Sloan at
Sunday October 8, 2006
Queensmount Arena, Kitchener
LOAD. STORE. PLAY.
You and 5 friends will have exclusive
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Complete the ballot below and drop it into the ballot box at the Campus Computer Store.
We'll draw the winner on Tuesday, October 3.
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under license. All other brands, product names, company names, trademarks and service marks arethe properties of their respective owners. © 2006
P8 ➤ arts&entertainment
theGazette • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
Lack of action renders Fearless punchless
Jet Li’s supposed last martial arts film a big dissapointment
I MAY BE ABLE TO STOP YOUR SWORD WITH MY THUMB, BUT I STILL CAN’T MAKE GOOD MOVIES! Jet Li exhibits some sparse and disappointing martial arts in Fearless, rumoured to be the actor’s last action-packed fighting flick.
Fearless
Directed by: Ronny Yu
Starring: Jet Li, Nakamura Shidou,
Betty Sun
By Steven Browne
Gazette Staff
Based on the true life story of Chinese martial artist Huo Yuanjia,
Fearless takes place in early 1900s
China.
Hou Yuanjia’s story could be
inspiring, but Fearless fails to present it effectively. Produced by Billy
Kong, the man behind the boxoffice smash Hero, Fearless lacks
the gigantic spectacles its predecessor had and fails miserably to
bring its varied characters to life.
Li is a great action star but his
acting skills don’t match his fighting skills in this movie. Fearless is a
stark contrast to his strong, emotional performance as Danny the
Dog in Unleashed. Surrounded by a
strong cast in Unleashed, Li proved
he had at least some acting skills —
none of which he displays in Fearless.
Li’s lacklustre performance is
mirrored by the rest of the cast,
which is comprised of nothing
more than cardboard cut-outs for
Li to grin at. Yuanjia’s brief relationships with numerous characters
leave viewers scratching their
heads trying to figure out who these
people are.
Perhaps inaccurate subtitles
can account for the weak, almost
unintelligible dialogue. Either way,
the script is confusing. At one point
Yuanjia and his opponent have an
odd conversation about the varieties of “Tea.” Although apparently
symbolic, the conversation is frustrating, since any sort of inspiration
or meaning is lost in their incoherent rambling.
Though the film has been marketed as a martial arts extravaganza, it lacks real villains to make the
fights exciting. At certain points,
cheering for the opponent seems
appropriate because the film doesn’t explain why they’re fighting. This
is typical of the genre, but it still
weighs the movie down.
Fearless is supposed to be an
action movie, but there is hardly
any action. Most of the film’s fights
are brief and pointless and most
scenes lack blood, guts and gore.
The longer battles lack emotion
and excitement, as they aren’t life or
death struggles; the opponents
usually just “walk it off” regardless
of how badly Yuanjia beats them.
What happened to tearing out your
opponent’s heart in a fit of rage?
Yuen Wo Ping, who choreographed the action scenes in
Unleashed, fails to generate similar
excitement in Fearless. Li’s famous
high-flying, super-human moves
are practically nonexistent.
It’s unfortunate this might be
Li’s last martial arts film. It lacks the
quality and intensity of Romeo
Must Die, Kiss of the Dragon or any
of his previous releases. To end a
legendary career with a limp offering like this indicates Jet Li is probably tired of doing the same old
schtick.
arts&entertainment ➤ P9
theGazette • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
Celebrity blogs bring out Hollywood’s worst
CONTINUED FROM P5
his site to get in with the “incrowd.”
Mario is flashier than Trent,
using his own image about 10
times more on his site, despite the
fact he looks suspiciously like a
middle-aged man still living with
his parents.
While Trent is mean, Mario is
much more vicious. He often goes a
step beyond Pink in the lack-ofdecency department, spoofing
things like celebrity deaths with
amusing pictures and disturbing
quotes. His site is definitely not for
people easily offended.
To stay “in” with the cool crowd,
Perez often refrains from marking
Paris Hilton or Jessica Simpson
with the labels that he bestows
upon other celebrities. In the
world of Perez, Fergie is “Fugly
Ferg,” Jennifer Aniston is “Maniston,” and Sienna Miller is “Sluttyienna.”
With quotes like “that evil whore
better not wear white,” Perez is the
place to go if you like seeing
celebrities torn apart and sewn
back together again.
If you’re looking for cheap thrills
or a way to improve your shattered
self-esteem — always at the
expense of celebrities — these
blogs are for you. Whether it’s Pink
or Perez, you won’t be disappoint-
ON DISC
Rum Runner
In Guns at Cyrano’s
Stumble Records/Longshot Music
Some say Great Big Sea is a bastardization of Celtic/East Coast
music. Rum Runner is a bastardization of Great Big Sea.
Hailing from Calgary, Alberta,
the band’s influences range from
Bukka White to Big Youth. Rum
Runner’s In Guns at Cyrano’s consists of 12 tracks ranging from
songs about social angst to songs
praising heavy drinking.
Despite coming from competent musicians, most of the band’s
melodies are comprised of all-toosimilar, fast-paced rants. These
tunes have little effect on listeners
as they offer only a stale voice and
predictable lyrics.
Rum Runner’s music doesn’t
reflect its supposed influences.
With amateur attempts at a “punk
rock” style, Rum Runner is best
enjoyed by those already indulging
in the heavy drinking the music
praises.
—Charlie Fox
Corinne Bailey Rae
Corinne Bailey Rae
Pop music has been pretty stagnant
lately. Whether it’s promiscuous
girls or guys bringing sexy-back,
there isn’t much variety in pop
these days.
With light guitar chords replac-
ing synthesizers and quality lyrics
replacing awful lines like “Is your
game MVP like Steve Nash?,”
Corinne Bailey Rae’s debut brings
pop into a totally new light.
The 27-year-old British singersongwriter has been highly praised
by the British press, referred to as a
“breath of fresh air,” and compared
to Joss Stone and Billie Holiday.
Her soulful vocals exude a
warmth that draws you in and
brings a smile to your face. The
album starts with the stunning
“Like a Star,” a perfect mix of strings
and guitar.
Soulful, jazzy, consistently sweet
and mellow tracks like “Put Your
Records On” and “Call Me When
You Get This” follow.
With lyrics like “Blue as the sky,
sombre and lonely/ Sipping tea in
the bar by the road side,” the album
has a fun, nostalgic summer vibe.
Her style is similar to Macy
Gray’s, minus the annoying voice.
What more can you ask for?
—Shawn Katuwapitiya
Like
bashing
Celebs?
Then volunteer
for A&E in Room
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You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll hurl.
Okay, maybe you won’t hurl.
Living a Grand lifestyle couldn’t be easier or more entertaining. We’re offering
an intimate and interactive experience you won’t find on any DVD! Take a break
to exercise the other half of your brain this fall with great music and big laughs.
Songstress Sarah Slean and the Comedy Network’s Comedy Lounge visit The
Grand this October, along with a harvest of other goodies.
SARAH
SLEAN
This accomplished singer
and songwriter/artist brings her
charismatic presence to the stage
at The Grand. Catch a glimpse
into Sarah’s life of love, evil gas
companies and joy riding with
J.D. Salinger.
Life should be Grand!
Call 519-672-8800 today
for tickets or buy online
at grandtheatre.com.
The Grand Theatre presents
An Evening with Sarah Slean
The popularity of this
tour continues to grow
as audiences rave about
some of Canada’s favourite
comedic talent. Join us for
this side-splitting, tear-jerking
program full of laughter.
Sunday, October 1
Show at 8pm
Tickets $32*
*Plus GST
and surcharge
per ticket.
TICKETS
START AT
$15
†
A FREE play, extra tickets
AND $300 in savings at
merchants make this a
great time to subscribe!
*Plus surcharge per ticket and GST. Some restrictions apply. † MainStage Series only.
The Grand Theatre presents
The Comedy Network’s Comedy Lounge
Sunday, October 15
Show at 8pm
Tickets $25*
*Plus GST
and surcharge
per ticket.
P10 ➤ sports
theGazette • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
NHL Preview: the Eastern Conference
’Canes looking good, but watch out for the Sens & Flyers
KICKIN’ UP MORE SNOW THAN ROBERT DOWNEY JR. Eric Staal (right) and the Carolina Hurricanes look to continue last season’s success by taking the conference.
Cristobal Huet (middle) and the Habs should jockey for a playoff spot with Darcy Tucker and the Leafs (left).
UWO
Student
Discount
100.11.C.03
• discounted instructional sessions
• free track bike rental for recreational sessions
• special race night discounts
• free shuttle services
Contact: Lorne Falkenstein
519 432 1423 [email protected]
www.forestcityvelodrome.ca
By Matt Larkin
Gazette Staff
PROJECTED STANDINGS
1. Carolina Hurricanes
2. Ottawa Senators
3. Philadelphia Flyers
4. Buffalo Sabres
5. New York Rangers
6. New Jersey Devils
7. Tampa Bay Lightning
8. Toronto Maple Leafs
9. Montreal Canadiens
10. Florida Panthers
11. Boston Bruins
12. Atlanta Thrashers
13. Pittsburgh Penguins
14. New York Islanders
15. Washington Capitals
Atlantic Division
Fajita Wednesdays
Double Fajitas!!
(Buy one order of Fajitas, get a 2nd FREE!)
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XXXMPPOFZDBMMDB
www.underthevolcano.com
The Philadelphia Flyers are like
the former “it” girl at my high
school who fell in love with poutine; they’re young, perky and
sprightly up front, but they’re sloppy and sluggish in the back. The
Simon Gagne/Peter Forsberg connection remains potent, and
promising youngsters Jeff Carter
and Mike Richards add supreme
depth at centre. Toss in Kyle Calder,
Geoff Sanderson and Sami Kapanen on the wings and you have a
frighteningly fast unit.
The New York Rangers are similar to the Washington Redskins.
They fooled their critics by finally
breaking out, but they still have
skeptics this year. Even with Brendan Shanahan, the Broadway
Blueshirts lack depth at forward
and their blueline won’t generate
much offence. Only time will tell if
sophomore netminder Henrik
Lundqvist is for real.
Lou Lamoriello plugs in virtually the same American-laden New
Jersey Devils lineup every year, but
it always rides superb chemistry
and defence to success. Hopefully
Zach Parise can assist Patrik Elias,
Scott Gomez and Brian Gionta in
Operation Keep-the-Devils-fansawake.
New York Islanders owner
Charles Wang may actually be
Satan; he makes players sign their
souls away and lives in a hellhole. If
nothing else, fans can bet on
whether Alexei Yashin or Rick DiPietro will cry on camera first.
Expectations should be more
realistic for the Pittsburgh Penguins after last year’s preseason
overhype. Sidney Crosby, Evgeni
Malkin and/or Jordan Staal will
have poolies salivating, but teams
who let the puck into their net several times a night typically lose
games.
Northeast Division
The Indianapolis Colts, er, Ottawa
Senators, probably need to blow
up their cursed core to win a Stanley Cup, but that doesn’t mean they
won’t dominate the regular season
again — even without Zdeno
Chara and Martin Havlat. Make no
mistake, though; Martin Gerber is
not an upgrade in net.
The Buffalo Sabres’ electrifying
offence makes me understand why
so many kids had seizures watching Pokémon. Buffalo may be the
filthiest city on Earth, and the new
slug logo is horrific, but the Sabres
have everything a Stanley Cup contender needs — stellar goaltending, a potent offence, and a deep, if
unspectacular, defence corps.
Toronto Maple Leafs haters
were so busy taunting Leafs Nation
this summer they didn’t notice
John Ferguson Jr. bolstering his
team’s blueline, replacing a geriatric netminder with 2004 Calder
Trophy winner Andrew Raycroft,
and adding young, fitnessobsessed head coach Paul Maurice. A low playoff seed is attainable.
Editor’s Note: This story reflects
the opinions of Matt Larkin, and
not necessarily The Gazette as a
whole. In fact, some believe trading
away your future for a goalie whose
winning percentage was under .300
last year is not a good idea.
Sure, half the Montreal Canadiens look more like software engineers than hockey players, but hey,
the new NHL rewards the nimble.
Newcomer Sergei Samsonov and a
full season of Cristobal Huet
should keep the Habs competitive.
The Boston Bruins are the
NHL’s Grade Seven science fair
experiment; many intriguing components — Marc Savard, Zdeno
Chara, and Phil Kessel — have
been added to a volatile mixture.
Will Beantown earn straight A’s or
explode all over some kid’s pimply
face?
Southeast Division
A repeat is within reach for the
defending Stanley Cup champion
Carolina Hurricanes, but it won’t
be easy. Not only are they without
Cory Stillman for the first few
months of the year, their blueline
is aging and goalie Cam Ward must
defy the sophomore jinx. Still, their
oustanding power forwards will
carry them to the top of the East.
The Tampa Bay Lightning
looked nothing like the 2004 Stanley Cup champions last season;
they won’t dominate this year but
should improve with Marc Denis,
a.k.a. someone who stop pucks on
purpose, in net.
Todd Bertuzzi may give the
Florida Panthers the offensive
spark they’ve lacked since the
Pavel Bure era, but the loss of
Roberto Luongo will really put the
defence to the test. Will opposing
teams fill the net regularly? Will Ed
Belfour die peacefully during a
game? We’ll see.
Ilya Kovalchuk and Marian
Hossa will keep things entertaining
in Atlanta, as will phenom Kari
Lehtonen in goal, but Thrasher
fans will go home disappointed
more often than not. They won’t be
too heartbroken, though, as children’s go-karting draws similar
crowds in the American Deep
South.
Who cares if the Washington
Capitals are a joke? Alexander
Ovechkin could light up the league
with a can of Fresca centring him.
Sit back and watch him pot borderline sexually-arousing goals.
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sports ➤ P11
theGazette • WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
NHL Preview: the Western Conference
By Matt Larkin
Gazette Staff
WESTERN CONFERENCE
1. Detroit Red Wings
2. Calgary Flames
3. Anaheim Ducks
4. San Jose Sharks
5. Nashville Predators
6. Minnesota Wild
7. Dallas Stars
8. Edmonton Oilers
9. Phoenix Coyotes
10. Vancouver Canucks
11. Colorado Avalanche
12. Columbus Blue Jackets
13. Los Angeles Kings
14. Chicago Blackhawks
15. St. Louis Blues
Central Division
After losing some future Hall-ofFamers up front, the Detroit Red
Wings will ride an über-deep blueline to another division title this
year. We’ll see less goals than normal in Hockeytown, but the standard of superb hockey will continue. Watch for defender Niklas Kronwall to make a name for himself.
The weak Central makes good
teams like the Nashville Predators
great. Their power play will keep
lighting up the lowly Hawks and
Blues and Jason Arnott brings a
strong two-way presence at centre.
Columbus cares about its hockey, and general manager Doug
MacLean’s hard work may finally
start paying off this year. If Nikolai
Zherdev signs and youngsters Rick
Nash and Gilbert Brule stay
healthy, the Blue Jackets could be
respectable.
The Chicago Blackhawks are
shadows of their former proud
selves, but young guns like the
deadly Martin Havlat give fans a
reason to put down their Polish
sausages and attend games. Phenomenal talent Tuomo Ruutu is
hurt again, so the Hawks’ offence
may sputter.
Fellow Yanks Doug Weight, Bill
Guerin and Keith Tkachuk must
think they’re in a screwball comedy about old buddies who reunite
for beer, broads and hockey. Little
do they know, 2006-07 will be a
gruesome horror flick for the St.
Louis Blues.
Northwest Division
The Calgary Flames have flirted
with glory the last couple years,
and Alex Tanguay could be the final
piece to their Stanley Cup puzzle.
Their blueline and goaltending
remain comically good, and
Jarome Iginla should sizzle with a
true playmaker feeding him.
Searching for the sexy darkhorse
that will make you look like a
genius come May? Look no further.
The Minnesota Wild added their
first true number one centre in
Pavol Demitra, their first true
power play quarterback in Kim
Johnsson, and a solid secondary
scorer in Mark Parrish. Watch as
Marian Gaborik scores 50 goals and
Jacque Lemaire’s boys trap opposing offences into oblivion.
If any friend of yours is missing,
he’s probably just manning the
point for the Edmonton Oilers.
Blueline woes aside, the Oiler
attack will keep improving as the
team skates its way to a low playoff
berth. Sniper Joffrey Lupul will look
like a steal within a few years.
They may deny it, but the Vancouver Canucks are dangerously
close to a rebuilding phase. The
underrated Sedin twins should
continue their superb play, but
Vancouver’s overall depth is decimated everywhere. On the bright
side, Roberto Luongo, like a man
after a vasectomy, may finally see
less rubber.
The Colorado Avalanche should
do their namesake justice as they
slide down the standings this year.
After Joe Sakic, Milan Hejduk and
Marek Svatos, their offence looks
house league-esque. Rob Blake’s
departure leaves a hole at defence,
and Jose Theodore is less predictable than an M. Night Shyamalan flick.
Pacific Division
You can’t blame the Ducks for
dropping the “Mighty”; who doesn’t want to move as far away from
Emelio Estevez as possible? Anaheim seems the consensus pick for
number one contender, and with
good reason. Their plethora of
snipers would make a SWAT team
jealous and the blueline pairing of
Chris Pronger and Scott Niedermayer is legendary.
Like the climax of an animated
Disney movie, NHL supremacy will
be decided by an epic battle
between two water animals. If the
Ducks are the top contender, the
San Jose Sharks are nipping at their
heels. Youth, speed, fitness, toughness, goaltending, my breakout
player of the year Mark Bell – you
name it, the Sharks have it. Only a
lack of experience can hold them
back.
The Dallas Stars should match
last year’s result, and there’s potential for more. Marty Turco should
bounce back from a hideous season, and Eric Lindros should make
the team better for his usual 30
games, but a lack of firepower will
keep the Lone Star State from hosting many playoff games.
Big, tough, and slow, the
Phoenix Coyotes could have contended in the old NHL. Instead, the
likes of Owen Nolan, Shane Doan,
and Ed Jovanovski will huff and
puff as the competition outhustles
them. Despite an improved powerplay, Wayne Gretzky won’t coach a
playoff game this year.
Any team with all-world asshole
Sean Avery should automatically
forfeit its season, but the Los Angeles Kings will try to win anyway.
Their defence should improve, but
most of their games will be like
your kids’ dance recitals; young
Michael Cammalleri and Alexander
Frolov will dazzle, but the rest of
the team will fall down and cry.
THE WILD, WILD WEST. PIPE DOWN, WILL SMITH. We don’t like films featuring “Big Willie Styles,”
but it’s hard not to like Jarome Iginla (top left), newest Oiler Joffrey Lupul (top right), former London Knight Rick Nash (bottom left) or former Michigan Wolverine Marty Turco (bottom right).
The
Gazette
Marketplace
Stanley Cup:
Vezina Trophy:
Anaheim
Mikka Kiprusoff, Calgary
Hart Trophy:
Norris Trophy:
Joe Thornton, San Jose
Dion Phaneuf, Calgary
Art Ross Trophy:
Calder Trophy:
Joe Thornton, San Jose
Evgeni Malkin, Pittsburgh
Jack Adams Trophy:
Jonathan Cheechoo, San Jose
Jacques Lemaire, Minnesota
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P12 WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
Sports
ON DECK: NHL pre-season
at the JLC... Thursday
OUA Football
Hawks seize prey at WLU Homecoming
Mustangs stampeded by Laurier’s lethal run game
By Danielle Neziol
Gazette Staff
The Western Mustangs were looking for
revenge against the Laurier Golden
Hawks on Saturday at University Stadium in Waterloo. Both teams hadn’t met
since last season’s Yates Cup final,
where Laurier eliminated the ’Stangs en
route to a Vanier Cup championship.
Despite high hopes going into the
game, Western failed to pay the Hawks
back.
The Hawks snapped the Mustangs’
two-game win streak with a 34-18 victory in front of a rowdy crowd of supporters attending Laurier’s Homecoming weekend.
The matchup was much anticipated
because of the squads’ rivalry and the
fact that both teams had started the
season similarly.
Both teams were 2-1 going into Saturday’s match-up — each having
picked up its only loss to the Ottawa
Gee-Gees — and both barely beat
Guelph in surprisingly close contests.
Western opened the scoring with a
touchback and two quick second-quarter touchdowns from wide receiver
Jesse Bellamy and running back D.J.
Bennett, giving it a 15-0 lead. But, other
than a Derek Schiavone field goal at the
end of the first half, Western failed to
score the rest of the game.
Defensive troubles accompanied
the Mustangs offensive woes as the
Golden Hawks responded quickly, scoring two majors late in the first half and
adding two more in the second.
Laurier stormed the field with 239
rushing yards while its defence held
Western to a paltry 27 yards.
“[Laurier] started running the ball a
bit in the second half, and then
turnovers put us in bad field position,”
said Paul Gleason, Western’s defensive
co-ordinator. “There were a number of
factors that led to those points they
scored.”
“We have to build from this [loss],”
said Mustangs running back Randy
McAuley. “It’s a tough game for me and
it’s a tough game for our whole team.
“A character builder is what we need
from this one. We played a good half of
football, but we need to put together a
full 60 minutes of football.”
Laurier offensive co-ordinator Ryan
Pyear attributed his team’s comeback to the home crowd.
“Every time we came out with
a big play, we carried out the
momentum that they gave us,” he
said.
Laurier starting quarterback
Jamie Partington left the game late
in the first half with a hamstring
injury, forcing backup Ian Noble to
take over in what was his first
game ever dressing.
The pressure of being
thrown into a highprofile game didn’t
seem to bother the
quarterback as he
led his offence to
an 18-point second half.
“I just got
tossed right into
[the
game],”
Noble said. “I wasn’t expecting to get
in. But I tried to
focus and do my job,
so it wasn’t too bad.”
Pyear
was
impressed with Noble’s
ability to perform under pressure.
“Today was Noble’s first
game ever dressing,” he
said. “He worked hard in
the offseason, and today
he really enjoyed the
experience
and
played very well.”
Partington is listed as day-to-day,
and Pyear expects
to have him back
for next weekend’s
game against crosstown rival Waterloo.
“To come out
with a victory in front
of our alumni and to
prove we can win a big
game like this means a
lot because there have
been a lot of doubters
about our team this year,”
Pyear said.
The Mustangs host Western’s homecoming Saturday.
Kurt Stolberg/Gazette
BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK
TO VICTORY. Western couldn’t get its running game
going against the tenacious
Laurier Golden Hawks, losing
34-18.
Gates: records falling left and right
By Len Caballes
Gazette Staff
In baseball, you swing the bat, you hit the
ball, and the Los Angeles Dodgers couldn’t
have asked for a better clutch hitter than
“Nomaaaaah.” Once again, Nomar Garciaparra showed critics he’s back, crushing a
grand salami — much to the envy of hefty
former Cowboys’ offensive lineman Nate
Newton. The bomb, hit off Diamondbacks
hurler Luis Vizcaino, lifted the Dodgers past
Arizona to keep their playoff hopes alive.
The San Diego Padres’ Trevor Hoffman recently recorded his 43rd save of the
2006 campaign, and, more importantly, he
got the 479th save of his career, passing Lee
Smith to become Major League Baseball’s
career saves leader.
For those who care about the American
League East, the New York Yankees
clinched the division (surprise, surprise).
The Detroit Tigers also secured a playoff
berth, proving there is something to cheer
about in Detroit other than the peeler bars
and Henry Ford. Hopefully, the Fall Classic
will provide more fireworks than an NRA
conference in the South on President’s
Day.
The NHL season is fast approaching,
and teams are making their final cuts to
solidify their roster. The defending champion Carolina Hurricanes hope to retain
Lord Stanley’s Mug. The Buffalo
Sabres also look to contend, but
have other problems to address, like avoiding Fabio references in regards to their new
logo — Lindy Ruff and co.’s attempt at a
neon-sperm complete with horns.
Week three in the NFL saw Carson
Palmer pick apart the vaunted Pittsburgh
Steelers’ blitz-based defence. Cornerback
Deshea Townshend should have doused
himself with gasoline, because his ass was
torched for touchdowns on three separate
occasions by Bengals wide receivers Chris
Henry and T.J. Houshmandzadeh.
Another marquee matchup saw last
year’s Super Bowl runners-up, the Seattle
Seahawks, battle Eli Manning and the New
York “Football Giants.” The Seahawks
looked nothing short of impressive, racking
up nearly 450 yards of total offence.
As
well,
“ T h e
G u n slinger of
Green Bay”
(a.k.a.
Brett
Favre) tossed the
400th touchdown of
his illustrious career,
powering the Packers past
Detroit and proving once again
Eminem should manage the Lions
and trade away their roster for Tigers
playoff tickets. Favre joins Dan Marino
as the only quarterbacks with 400 touchdown passes.