Document 6441045

D6 LIFE
WEDNESDAY,
WEDNESDAY,
JANUARY JANUARY
15, 2014 15,
DECATUR,
2014 DECATUR,
ILLINOIS ILLINOIS
ATT
3 # WCIA
12 , WILL
10 1 WAND
2 4 WICS
6 7 WBUI
DICK ZAKER
19 Q WCIX
Prairie Talk
7 W WRSP
More than a
few mysteries
in Zakerland
Somewhere, in a secluded
cranny of our house, a can opener,
vegetable brush and ice cube tray
gather. They chuckle — once
again — over the hapless humans.
“Look at them,” they exclaim,
“Wringing their hands over us!
‘HOW could we lose such a good
can opener?’ Boo hoo! And such a
small thing, they say: Where could
the vegetable brush possibly be?”
On wrapping up their meeting,
they sneer, “They’ll never find us
— bwah hah hah!”
Thus is the state of affairs in
Zakerland. We’re the emotional
captives of three inanimate —
but very tricky objects.
There is no earthly reason
why any of them should have
escaped the kitchen. And the
can opener WAS good: a Pampered Chef model that was
pretty easy on the wrist.
My wife and I have come to
accept the notion that we always
have to have a family mystery.
At least one at a time. As soon as
one’s solved, another pops up.
We’re not your average,
“single-sock mystery” household: Our clothes dryer isn’t
that hungry.
Buying something ahead of
time can get interesting. I’ve
been known to purchase a gift
for my wife, just to see it take
cover in a secluded corner of a
closet and escape my memory.
Not my wife’s, though. She
picked out a nightgown for me
to give her and I put it away so
well that it took years to find it.
As you can see, this trend
isn’t recent. It stretches back
almost as long as our marriage.
What about the mystery people at our wedding, way back in
the last century. My wife recalls
them as a neighbor and his girlfriend. I insist they were wedding crashers. If so, the joke was
on them: There was no alcohol
at our reception.
Take the case of the relatively
new pair of my daughter’s boots
that goes missing: Are they
where they’re supposed to be,
in the basket by the front door?
Nope. In the next most logical spot, the front hall closet?
Please: Where would be the
mystery in that?
A few days into this particular
“case,” my wife stopped by the
computer room and sighed,
“This thing with the boots is
driving me crazy in the head.”
Me, too. I looked in both cars.
I looked in the laundry room. I
checked under the pool table.
Under all the beds. Behind all
the couches. Nothing. Nada.
Negative. Zero. Zilch.
This footwear somehow had
made its way into the proverbial
thin air.
Fast-forward to the next day.
The rebellious boots turned up,
under a pile of sewing fabric in
my daughter’s bedroom closet.
Yes, I had glanced into her
closet, but I certainly didn’t suspect she had dumped the fabric
into the same space as the boots.
Yes, this is a “miss-story,” but
I swear it’s not a matter of our
being absent-minded.
Here’s a recent good example:
We’re stopped in downtown
St. Louis and open the door to
switch drivers. In the time it
takes us to get re-seated, we find
one of the three pages of Google
maps has disappeared. Gone. No
one saw it blow into the Missouri
sky out of the car. No one saw it
slide under the front seat. You
tell me where it went.
And this is even a better one:
A few weeks ago, I jotted some
notes for this very column into
the newspaper’s computer
system. Boy, they were good
ones, too. So, the other day, I
went back to the file to add a
few more precious words and —
well, you can guess the rest.
Some mysteries are more
gut-wrenching than others.
You can’t find your wallet, or
car keys or cellphone. The next
several minutes are panicky —
until you find them in the door
or the pocket of a coat you’re
sure you hadn’t been wearing
that day.
I certainly would like to have
all the time back that I’ve spent
searching for things.
All right, Hey, kakhi pants —
you can come out now. You win!
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ANNIVERSARIES
Mr. and Mrs. Tom Seitz
Mr. and Mrs. Jim Hopkins
SEITZ
HOPKINS
DECATUR — Mr. and Mrs.
Tom Seitz of Decatur will observe
their 35th wedding anniversary.
Cards may be sent to 7 Powers
Lane Place, Decatur, IL 62522.
Mr. Seitz and Debbie Hickey
were married Jan. 21, 1979, in
Decatur. He is retired from
General Transfer Co. She works
for St. Mary’s Hospital.
They are the parents of T.J.
(Heather) Seitz of Mount Zion.
They have one grandchild and
one stepgrandchild.
DECATUR — Mr. and Mrs.
Jim Hopkins of Decatur will celebrate their 30th wedding anniversary with a trip to Hawaii.
Mr. Hopkins and Margaret
Watts were married Jan. 20,
1984. He is retired from Local
65 Plumbers and Pipefitters.
She is employed at Archer
Daniels Midland Co. corporate
grain accounting.
They are the parents of Lynn
Meister of Petersburg; Buck
Hopkins of Antioch; Casey
Watts of Homer; Vickey Shain
of Cerro Gordo; Derek Hopkins
of St. Peters, Mo.; and Jeremy
Watts of Collinsville. They
have 11 grandchildren and five
great-grandchildren.
Mr. and Mrs. Larry Rawlings
Mr. and Mrs. Vern Morgan
RAWLINGS
MORGAN
DECATUR — Mr. and Mrs.
Vern Morgan of Decatur
celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary with a family gathering.
Mr. Morgan and Sherry Hahn
were married Jan. 11, 1964,
in Decatur.
They are the parents of Lori
(Ben) Pinney of Ashland; and
David Morgan of Tampa, Fla.
They have one grandchild.
BETHANY — Mr. and Mrs.
Larry Rawlings of Bethany will
celebrate their 50th wedding
anniversary with an open reception from 2 to 5 p.m. Sunday,
Jan. 19, in Bethany Fire Station.
Mr. Rawlings and Carolyn
Ricketts were married Jan.
19, 1964, in Effingham. He is
retired from Caterpillar Inc.
She is retired from the Moultrie
County Health Department.
They are the parents of Lyndall Rawlings of Bethany; Jana
(Sean) Nashland of Sullivan;
and Juli Taber of Mattoon. They
have six grandchildren and two
great-grandchildren.

Mr. and Mrs. Leland Personette
Anniversaries
Mr. and Mrs. Daniel Ferguson
FERGUSON
DECATUR — Mr. and Mrs.
Daniel Ferguson of Decatur
celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary with a family gathering.
Mr. Ferguson and Juanice
Fuller were married Jan. 4,
1964, in Brownsville, Tenn. He
is retired from Wagner Castings
Co.. She is retired from Caterpillar Inc.
They are the parents of Rondy
Ferguson and Shawn (Patrick)
Shields, both of Atlanta, Ga.
They have two grandchildren
and one great-grandchild.
Anniversary announcements
are published Wednesday in the
Life section. The basic fee is
$30 with a color or black &
white photo. If you choose, you
may submit two photos (a then
and now) for $45. Forms with
details are available at the Herald & Review, 601 E. William
St., or by mail or fax by calling
(217) 421-6979. PDF forms are
available for download at www.
herald-review. com.
PERSONETTE
DECATUR — Mr. and Mrs. Leland W. Personette of Decatur will
observe their 50th wedding anniversary.
Mr. Personette and Ruth Diane Washburn were married Jan. 16,
1964, in New London, Mo. He is an Air Force veteran and is the
retired manager of environment, health and safety for H.B. Fuller.
She is a homemaker.
They are the parents of Paul (Tami) Personette of Lindenhurst;
Phillip (Melissa) Personette of Noblesville, Ind.; and Brian (Nina)
Personette and Matthew Personette, both of Decatur. They have
nine grandchildren.

Birthdays
Birthday announcements are
published in the Wednesday Life
section at 70-plus years of age
with a black & white photo for
free. The fee is $55 for a color
photo.
Forms with details are available at the Herald & Review, 601
E. William St., or by mail or fax
by calling 421-6979. PDF forms
are available for download at
www.herald-review. com.
Vivid memories
The Herald & Review is now offering individuals celebrating their birthdays
the option of running their photos in color. Call 421-6979 for details.