’S BIGGEST NUT JOB IN POP CULTURE? WHO By Gino Bona

Transcription

’S BIGGEST NUT JOB IN POP CULTURE? WHO By Gino Bona
WHO’S BIGGEST NUT JOB IN POP CULTURE?
By Gino Bona
February 18, 2003
Gatorade launched its brilliant "Be Like Mike" advertising campaign 12 years ago, and it had
millions of Americans singing the same tune. We wanted Michael Jordan's good looks, his
guaranteed contract, his sick vertical leap.
But as MJ spends another new day as a 40-something, two other famous people—who happen
to share Jordan's first name—are going toe-to-toe for the undisputed title of "Biggest Nut Job in
Pop Culture."
We're talking about Michael Jackson and Mike Tyson. While these celebrities couldn't be
further opposites on the exterior, their careers have shared a common pattern over the past 20
years. Both Tyson and Jackson reached the pinnacle of their popularity in the '80s, plummeted
into dire times in the '90s, and have spent the first couple years of the new millennium as
undeniable weirdos.
Of course, both have had their share of controversy, too. Tyson is on the verge of snapping like
a Slim Jim during every fight and interview. Meanwhile, the word "allegedly" hangs over
Jackson's head like an umbrella on a sunny day.
These days, the catchy chorus of "Be Like Mike" should carry a parental warning.
Nickname
Trademark move
Net worth
Career highlight
MICHAEL JACKSON
“King of Pop”
Moonwalk
Depends on who you ask
“Thriller”
How they describe themselves
Comfort food
Was teased as a child for…
Is teased as an adult for…
“I’m Peter Pan”
Snow cones
Having a huge nose
Acting like a child.
Current foe
Likes to throw
Facial adjustments
Martin Bashir
Water balloons
Nose hanging by a thread
MIKE TYSON
“King of Pain”
Profanity-laced tantrums
Ask Robin Givens
Thrilling 91-second thumping of
Michael Spinks
“I’m Sonny Liston”
Ears
Talking like Cindy Brady
Are you crazy?! We’re not teasing
Mike.
The flu (according to his promoter)
Right hooks
African tribal tattoo
What he has in common with
normal people
What he’s looking forward to
Favorite pet
Memphis connection
Reckless behavior
What they wish they could borrow
from each other
Favorite activity with children
Worst beating
Authority figure who didn’t do quite
enough
Las Vegas craving
Lies about how much money he has
Hasn’t been to the gym in a while
Fox airing “Michael Jackson Take 2:
The Interview They Wouldn’t Show
You”
12-year-old Gavin
Married Elvis Presley’s daughter
Playing “Dangle Doodle Dandy” over
hotel balconies
Tyson’s enviable falsetto
Fox airing “Michael Jackson Take 2:
The Interview They Wouldn’t Show
You”
Those damn pigeons
Only place that lets him box
Live press conferences
Wants to share his bed with ‘em
From Dad after messing up a dance
routine
Liz Taylor
Bizzaro shopping sprees
Startling transformation
From black man to white
hermaphrodite
It’s a shame that…
Macauley Caulkin’s too old now
Career low point
Stay tuned
Prince Michael II’s chiffon scarf to
cover up the new ink
Wants to eat ‘em
(Tie) Buster Douglas, Evander
Holyfield, Lennox Lewis
Cus D’Amato
The Nevada State Athletic
Commission to reconsider
From the youngest heavyweight
nd
champ to America’s 2 -most
beloved cannibal
Tonya Harding’s pro debut will be
delayed
Ditto
--------Gino Bona continually strives for rock bottom on his "Wink & The Gun" site, which can be
reached at www.winkandthegun.com. E-mail him at [email protected].