- How To Play A Winning Hand ,

How To Play A Winning Hand
-
Even When You Don’t Have The Best Cards
By Irene E. Taylor, Praxis
[email protected]
A Philosophical Question
Is This as Good as It Gets?
OR
Is There Much More You Can
Get Out of Life?
Answer
Some people get more out of
life than others because they
make better choices.
If You Are To Remember
Only One Thing From
Tonight…
Let It Be This
How To Replicate Your
“Moments” Of Perfection
Tonight
Lessons from those who do it best
summarized by Kenny Rogers in
The Gambler: “You got to know
when to hold ‘em. Know when to
fold ‘em. Know when to walk
away and know when to run…”
Our Topic
Career-Life Panning:
How to Find and
Replicate Your Perfect
Moments
Our Goal
To leave you with one or
two ideas that you are
motivated to take action on.
Our Measure Of
Success
Your e-mails to
Praxis Partners with your
progress, results, etc.
Praxis Research
 Hundreds
of high achievers in banking,
finance, law, engineering and technology.
 Thousands of hours of in-depth interviews.
 Thousands of psychological tests.
 Hundreds of noteworthy achievements
including: academic, philanthropic,
athletic, innovative product/solution
breakthroughs, and so forth.
One Learning
Success and achievement result
from the Ricochet Effect –
stimulating achievement in one
area of one’s life drives
achievement in other areas too.
Example
Don Jack
Senior Partner,
Lerners LLP
Spinning/Pilates
Instructor and…
Avid outdoorsman
Example
Lori Kirwan
Canada’s leading
personal trainer,
Fitness Coach, PHD
Researcher and
Spokesperson for
The Heart and Stroke
Foundation
Other Significant Insights
About High Achievers…
1. They are definitely NOT perfect –
essentially we are all dysfunctional
in one way or another.
2. Not born with silver spoon –
most come from working/middle
class.
3. Adversity and struggle
characterize about one third of
our total research pool.
Example

John Brussa
Senior Partner
Burnet, Duckworth &
Palmer LLP in
Calgary
4. Unconditional support from a
parent or someone close to them
in early years is a major success
factor.
5. All show multiple and repeated
incidents of achievement – have
developed a need for it in their life.
Example
Ava Yaskiel, Partner
Ogilvy Renault LLP
Exotic Adventurer/Philanthropist
Ten Most Defining Qualities
& Conditions
Assess yourself:
1 non-existent, 3 low, 5 average
7 pretty good, 10 as good as it
gets
1. Razor Sharp Self-Awareness
(an EQ gateway skill)
 Strengths/talents
 What
they aren’t good at
 Their
nature/personality
 What
makes them tick
2. “Fire in the Belly” – Intrinsically
Versus Extrinsically Motivated
 Intellectual
engagement
 Challenges,
struggle
 Achievement
 Making
a meaningful difference
Example
Dr. Jordan Peterson
3. Above Average IQ
(raw intelligence)
 Problem
solving
 Verbal
skills/comprehension
 Rapid
learner
 Superior
judgment
4. Adaptability/Flexibility –
Openness (EQ)
 Intellectual
curiosity – e.g., reads, travels
widely
 Intuitive
 Future
 “Out
oriented
of the box” thinker
 Eclectic,
sometimes eccentric
Example
Robert Armstrong,
Senior Litigator,
Ogilvy Renault
Serious Photographer
5. Resilience to Adversity
and Stress (EQ)
 Views
problems as opportunities
 Motivated
 High
by challenge
levels of perseverance
6.Interpersonal Skills, Including the
Ability to “Read’ Others (EQ)
 Are
liked and trusted by others
 Gets
more from others because of this
 Have
great “gut” instincts about others
Example
Dale Lastman, Co-Managing Partner
of Goodmans LLP,
Camp Counselor/Law School Professor
7. Attractive Packaging
 Energy
 Sense
of humour
 Physical
appearance
8. Disciplined
 Strong
 Gets
work ethic
emotionally vested
 Willing
to delay need for immediate
gratification (high impulse control) (EQ)
Example
Jean Guy Coulombe
President
Metso Minerals Canada
Example
Jack Osborne
before
after
9. Strong Ego
 Self-starters
 Often
who take initiative
measure self-worth through their
accomplishments
 High
need for control
10. Optimistic (EQ)
 Expect
 Have
the best
“glass half full” mindset
 Recover
failures
quickly from setbacks and
Different Profiles of Success e.g., Entrepreneurs
Strengths:
Weaknesses:
•
Adaptability
•
•
Stress Tolerance
•
Optimism
•
Impulse Control
•
Risk-takers
•
Interpersonal Skills –
•
Independence
Not always best team
player
(for some)
The Sixty-Five Thousand
Dollar Question…
How to maximize these
qualities and conditions
in yourself?
Answer
It all begins with getting a
better understanding of the
hand you have dealt.
Career Life Planning –
A Five Step Process
1. Taking Stock – Self-Assessment
2. Reality Check – e.g., 360 Feedback
3. Goal Setting and Action Planning
4. Execution and Early Wins
5. Evaluation and Recalibration
The 80/20 Rule
80% of the effort and success
comes from 20% of the process –
Taking Stock.
Ten Practical To Do’s…
1. Develop Mastery
 Creativity
 To
IS 98% perspiration
think “outside the box” you need to
know what is inside the box (completely)
 Mastery
enables you to find your “edge”
2. Re-Awaken Your Intellectual
Curiosity

Start a reading program that will stretch your
mind

Get involved in learning a new sport, hobby or
volunteer pursuit that will bring fresh learning
and alter your view of life and your world

Become an adventurer/explorer – seek out new
places and faces
3. Set two to three meaningful
goals (e.g., one professional
growth, one family, one
personal). Attach an action plan
with a timetable and specific
deliverables for each
 E-mail
[email protected] for
follow up and reward.
4. Develop Your Appetite for
Achievement - Making a Positive
Difference
 Take
“self challenge” or Body For Life
 Sign up for a language, cooking or home
improvement course
 Start doing random acts of kindness – set
a goal for one a week
 Spend 15 minutes once a week setting
weekly “to do” goals and review what you
achieved the previous week
5. Breathe life and energy into your
key relationships
 Begin
to “attend” to those you care about
 “Read”
them, become intuitive about how
to make them feel cared for and important
 Give
random acts of kindness right in your
own home and office
 Give
the gift of listening and empathy
6. Become More Disciplined
 Sign
up for courses/programs that will
increase discipline and focus
 Get
to work a half-hour early and plan a
meaningful, challenging day
 Decrease
passive time (e.g., TV) and
replace it with reading, walks, talks, etc.
 Assess
and strengthen your impulse
control (EQ assessment)
7. Become A Master of Time
Management
 See
“Getting More Time”
 Caution!
Give yourself more reflection and
personal planning time
8. Sharpen Your Self-Awareness
 Complete
self-assessments (even those
on-line or in magazines). Remember that
80% of the value is in the reflection and
discussion (including with others)
 Develop
the habit and skill of asking for
feedback (e.g., what should I do next?)
9. Love What You Do





Develop an emotional commitment with what
you do for a living
Learn everything you can about the “stars” in
your profession and all the things they do to set
themselves apart
Don’t copy but learn and integrate things that
play to your strengths
Get to know and understand your clients
(internal and external) on a deeper level. Find
out what they value most
Set “personal best” goals for yourself
10. Show Others that you are
Authentic – The Real Deal
 Stop
engaging in any negative office
gossip
 Share
your views descriptively and
candidly even when not popular, with no
hidden agendas
 Under
promise and over deliver
What We’ve Learned…
1. “Fire in the belly” and
self-awareness may
be the most
significant
pre-requisite.
2. Strategies for success
(and satisfaction) are
different under age 40 and
over age 50. Doing what
you’ve always done likely
won’t get you to a different
end.
3. Almost everything
gets tougher as you get
older, so you need to
work harder and be
more creative.
4. Success and
happiness are 99%
perspiration (1%
inspiration). It only looks
easy from the outside.
5. Most of our high
achievers have not
sacrificed family and
friends as the price of
success.
6. They have learned to
value and use family and
friends as their support
system and to keep
them grounded.
7. High achievers are often
high maintenance, who
sometimes have
unrealistically high
expectations for themselves
and others. They need
gentle reminders and reality
checks.
8. Almost invariably their
“starting point” is
human/relationship
focused. They are
interested in helping
someone do something.
In Closing
There Are Four Kinds of
People Today…
1. Those Who Watch
Things Happen
2. Those To Whom
Things Happen
3. Those Who Don’t
Know What’s Happening
4. Those Who Make
Things Happen
The Choice Is All Yours