03 - Valley Planet
Transcription
03 - Valley Planet
page 1 Letter From The Publisher Publisher Milton A. Lamb Jr. Executive Editor Tammy Westmoreland General Manager Cherié Lamb VP Sales & Marketing Brian Suwarow Well, we’re 2 months into this Valley Planet experiment, and already I’ve been removed from writing here. I really don’t know what I did to deserve this, but my wife, Cherié, is taking over letter from the publisher for this issue. She’s already got her poetry, her article and her photographs in here. You’d think that would be enough, but nooo! Oh well, maybe I’ll write again next issue. Milton A. Lamb Jr. Classified Ad Manager LaDonna Thrasher photo by guess who...Cherié Lamb Contributors Dr. Anarcho, Jeremy L. Anderson, Jennifer H. Daniel, Uncle Flabby, Allison Gregg, Linda Haynes, Sharon Jordan, Michael Kilpatrick, Cherié Lamb, Evelyn Loehrlein, Jennie McBride, Cody Roy, Jimbo Scampi, Justin Segura, Brian Suwarow, Martha Templeton, Bryan Thames, Ricky Thomason, Georgina Troughton The Valley Planet is printed for you by the good folks at Pulaski Web. Pulaski, Tennessee The VALLEY PLANET and valleyplanet.com are published twice monthly by VALLEY PLANET INC. P.O.Box 335, Meridianville, AL 35759. Subscriptions are available for $42 per year, but you can pick up the paper free all over the place or get it free on the web. One copy per person please; don’t waste trees. Copyright 2003 by the VALLEY PLANET, INC. All rights reserved. Reproduction or use without our permission is strictly prohibited. The views and opinions expressed within these pages and on the web site are not necessarily those of VALLEY PLANET, INC or its staff. The VALLEY PLANET is not responsible for unsolicited manuscripts or art. Back issues, when we have some, will be available for $2 each. Please send requests by email [email protected], or mail Valley Planet, P.O.Box 335, Meridianville, AL, 35759, or call 256.858.6736. Rock on. page 2 After our last issue, someone asked us what was our focus? What is the Planet trying to promote or be? We want to be a voice of our area. We at the Planet do not have a political, religious or philosophical agenda that we are trying to shove down your throat. Our agenda is to help promote local ideas, businesses and offerings of the Valley, whether that be music, dining, the arts, shopping, bar-hopping, reporting, ramblings, funny stories, personal thoughts and opinions, creative expressions, hiking, travel … well, I think you get the idea. We are an eclectic collection of the Valley and its people. The letter from the Silent Screamer says it best. We want to allow freedom of speech, while not printing or promoting anything you wouldn’t watch on TV (that includes the Comedy Channel and all those reality shows, but staying on this side of “The Sunday Night Sex Show” that’s on Oxygen.) At the Valley Planet, we want to present as many points-of-view, opinions and ideas as we feel are entertaining, add to the appeal of the paper and promote the Valley. While many of us Vallians were born and raised in this area, many of us are transplants from different cities and countries … a great big Valley melting pot. This area has a lot to offer, but sometimes seems to lack a cohesiveness or an identity (something people can identify with and become a part of). The mountainous landscapes surrounding this area still amaze me (coming from an area where you don’t see even many hills). The amazing collections of preserved and lived-in historic homes are also unique and bring much character to the area. There are a lot of restaurants, nightlife, music, art, shopping, ideas and VERY talented people right here in OUR area. That’s right; if you live here, you are from here — therefore YOUR area. The Valley is us. It is your next-door neighbor (you may or may not know), your co-worker, your friend or foe, your preacher or your barkeep. And the Planet wants to bring us together to entertain, inform and just share ideas. We are evolving with each issue, and you — the Vallians who choose to participate in the experiment — are shaping the future of the Planet and hopefully the Valley itself. Do you like to stand on your soapbox? Do you want to share your views, opinions and philosophy of life? Then email us and tell us your views or your opinion of what you have read. You can become a part of the project or just enjoy it (or not) from afar. All we ask is that you visit our advertisers so the Planet can continue to revolve and evolve. We have been amazed by the talent and the people that have become a part of the Planet. Thank you for your participation. Cherié Lamb In The Planet THE VALLEY PLANET VOLUME 1, ISSUE 3 #090403092403 September 4 - September 24, 2003 NEXT ISSUE SEPTEMBER 25, 2003 4 4 5 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 22 23 23 24 27 29 29 30 31 32 33 on the cover, the artwork of andrew sharpe letters to the planet unchained maladies boondocks brothers in music, antony and andrew sharpe lincoln county bluegrass festival, september 26 & 27 weirdoes in the garden keys, locks and things that go honk in the night 2003 mova arts festival, september 18-21 married... yet? reviews: print reviews: cinema last chance, vote yes or forever hold your peace monte sano art show, september 20 wet/dry issue great opportunity for athens’ future calendar 41st ann arbor film festival at uah convergence in art the deep end listings garden of eatin’ dr. anarcho’s rx for old stuff that don’t suck liquid meat - beads, bathrooms and black batons huntsville symphony orchestra celebrates news of the weird ask uncle flabby jimbo scampi - huntsvegas baby page 3 On The Cover By Michael Kilpatrick Letters To The Planet Your magazine rocks!! Mark Young A veritable black and white advertising rag of soy based ink and recycled paper whose kinda edgy articles with vestiges of conservatism for broader appeal to manic masses of southerners looking for life in places of times or calendar events while attempting to glean a sense of belonging while strangers who write words for hope and offerings of products splash the pages vying for interest with dollars spent employing images to conjure people wanting to belong to a planet in the valley of the shadow of dixie but rocked and changed by space but merged from gray in events published for appeal to masses whose angst is hidden in interest but flickered by shooting waves of reality to silently scream their topics to anyone with hope made less lonely by clinging to people solidified with issues that raise the conscious level by being a free offering to publicly available denizens of generations of x and ys. The Silent Screamer Dude, YOU are my hero. Pictured is a very thin and handsome Dr. William S. Janna, Professor of Mechanical Engineering at the University of Memphis, smartly attired in his recently won Valley Planet T-shirt. “It is the prize of my collection,” remarked Dr. Janna. You were my hero until the Silent Screamer screamed. I really liked the news of the weird section (it’s my favorite) and the restaurant and book review. The book review could have been a little more straight forward for my taste, read it or not???? Can’t put it down or can’t pick it up?????? Ricky Thomason article was a little overboard for my taste. I’m just being honest..... I think you guys have a really good thing going. It’s a great read!!!! See ya, V.M. Decatur more art by Andrew Sharpe Andrew Sharpe is from St. Albans, England, and is based in Huntsville, Ala. Andrew has been an artist for most of his life and is a skilled craftsman with firm and classic training at the Art Institute of Atlanta, where he received an associate’s degree. He has personal and commissioned art all over the Southeast. Andrew is also a pianist and vocalist with the local group Toy Shop (article on page 6). No doubt his brilliant musical mind influences his artistic processes, and vice versa. Andrew’s work echoes the famous muralist Thomas Hart Benton, in which manipulations and whimsical form play a huge role. Andrew’s works are full of drama, expression and style. Upon closer examination, the works reveal precise attention to detail, with visual contortions and humorous elaborations full of exaggerated perspectives. Also present are jumbles of highly stylized characters in imaginative locales. The eye simply finds more and more structures to follow with each viewing. Caricatures are also present in some of Andrew’s work, and the gentle satire and storytelling reveal volumes of experience with human and animal forms. Imagination and fantasy play a role as well, with highly conceptualized looks at skewed reality. Effective juxtaposition of colors also contribute to Andrew’s work, as it escapes into a fictional world of his own making and invites you along for the ride. Andrew Sharpe can be contacted and his art can be viewed online in “Andrew’s Art” at www.toy-shop.us. Note: The artwork depicted on the cover of the Valley Planet is a work in colored pencils on illustration board, which Andrew presented to his sisterin-law, Leslie, as a birthday gift. Good going Valley Planet!!! The party at the Jello Room was great fun & thanks for the cool T-shirts!! Valley Planet gets better every issue. I can’t wait to read September’s issue. Keep up the first class work! J.K. Huntsville Sucking up for another freebe, aye? I discovered VP at Zesto’s when I visited Huntspatch after a 30-year absence last week. The tree is gone! I sure do miss the place and I am grateful for a cyberlink to it. Like a ghost, I checked out the old house on McClung Ave next to the cemetery where I lived while serving at RSA and attending UAH. I was unable to find old friends but give my love to Deborah, Ursula, and Sharon. Chris, who moved to Florida in 1973 Hello to the staff at Valley Planet, Wow, what a lovely paper! If you have read the “Southern Belles Handbook” you know that “lovely” is the highest adjective that can be bestowed. I have had to refer to this cultural manual on numerous occasions, having been raised in my mother’s town of St. Louis Mo. and having been taught my gracious manners by my Yankee grandmother. After a nine year adventure in New Orleans (where you really don’t need gracious manners so much as the ability to say “Back off, Jack” and mean it, something my grandmother didn’t figure I’d ever need to know), I landed in Huntsville. If our ecomony could pick up continued on page 7 page 4 Happy Birthday Chris! Cherie gives this letter 2 thumbs up! Unchained Maladies Ricky Thomason Writes You’ve all wondered who the mildmannered reporter is at your Valley Planet, the subversive’s guide to Huntsville’s over-the-counter-culture. Some of us write anonymously, and we’re sure you understand why. I’m going to share with you the most closely guarded secret at the VP office: my true identity. whomever happens to be rubbing it on us at the time. I won’t reveal mine in detail, but it’s more powerful than any pocketful of Kryptonite. Like most super athletes, I’m strong and fast, but it seems we’re just not very s-m-a-r-t. Don’t think I’m just another weekdays, but you better do the posted half-dollar on Saturday morns. That many cops wouldn’t show up if O.J. crashed a white Bronco into Krispy Kreme. Am I the only alien in this burg that hasn’t opened a Mexican restaurant? One more super question: why — and how — do women use so much toilet paper? I know what you’re thinking, but I’m far too sensitive and polite to use the x-ray vision to peek. A group of men will use one roll of toilet paper a week. Ladies use a roll-per-trip-per-woman. I suspect women just push the cardboard core out far enough to make a handle on the new roll, and then use the whole thing like a bottle brush. You’ve heard the jeering cries about me when injustices are committed in our throbbing metropolis, “Look! Up in the sky! It’s a turd! It’s a pain! It’s — Stuporman!” Yes, down at the superclub, those cynical oafs call me the man of stool, say I’m faster than a speeding mullet, more powerful than my loco motives, able to leap to tall conclusions in single bounds. I had to come out after Wonder Woman got big ink last issue. I call her “Wonder Woman” because I wonder if that gal could hem a hog up in a ditch. There, I feel better. Don’t be fooled by that “Super Friends” crap on TV. That gang is just as backbiting, gossipy, petty and jealous as the people in your workplace. Old Thor stays sore. We had to take his hammer. The Incredible Bulk sulks, turns green and busts out of his britches over the least little thing. The Six-Million Dollar Man and Woman have completely depreciated. And that obnoxious Spiderman shoots his sticky stuff everywhere — then tries to tell us it’s protein and good for us. Holy Salami, if you want to see a dynamic snit, ask Buttman and Rubbin’ what you get when you cross rump roasts with Power Rangers. Just don’t tell our local Lois Lane editor person. She hasn’t a clue as to who I really am and never notices that Stuporman and I never appear together. I always “just miss him.” I’m about caught up on this in-thecloset rescuer’s job anyway. Lately, when the brown gravy hits the fans, I duck into a phone booth and change my mind. Being Super anyone isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. One of the worst things is these damned little suits you have to wear. Look at mine — fruity blue pantyhose wedgied up the crack of my butt while, for some inexplicable reason, I wear my drawers on the outside. Then there’s that towel hung around my neck, good for nothing but to flap in the wind when I fly. Mama Kent dressed me funny, but it’s all part of the show now. I must fly. Next issue, I’ll return to my usual mild-mannered self, I promise. artwork by Debbie West hunk of Kobe beef, though. I think and wonder about important stuff. As I’ve flown through Huntsville and life, I have noticed a few things I’d like to ask about. Why all the cop cars on Memorial Parkway every Saturday morning? You may drive seventy with impunity during Enough already — my ass is completely burrito’d out. Things are happening that can no longer be blamed on the guiltylooking Super dog. The Ionic Breeze gets badly overloaded. A recent study on gas claimed there’s little difference between regular and super. Obviously, no one Ricky Thomason is a freelance writer from Huntsville. Email Rick at [email protected]. BOONDOCKS All heroes must have a chink in the armor, that one little thing that makes us weak, causes lapses of judgment, and temporarily puts us under the spell of checked with me. If we don’t get some different cuisine around here, I’m going to start skywriting when I fly. (Surrender Dorothy) You think you’re good? Maybe you can crop dust an entire aisle in the Wal-Mart, but if I get started, Huntsville will smell like Birmingham. page 5 Brothers In Music Antony And Andrew Sharpe Bring Music Full Circle Soon, the heavier sounds of Black Sabbath, UFO and Led Zeppelin began filtering into Antony’s musical vocabulary. “I was taken by the more experimental side of Led Zeppelin, particularly the Physical Graffiti record for its imaginative bent, and the Black Sabbath stuff was so powerful, yet very melodic at the same time,” Antony explained. “Eventually the later period Beatles stuff began to make an impression on me ... not so much the ‘Fab Four’ stuff, but more the last few records of theirs, the Rubber Soul/White Album/Abbey Road years. They seemed to be stretching out and discovering, and I was doing a bit of that myself.” The guitar by then was a permanent fixture in the young man’s hands, and Antony dedicated himself to long hours of working out the constructions of this classic material, piece by piece. more art by Andrew Sharpe M usic is an integral part of culture in which people share ideas, and these ideas are then expanded upon by each generation, creating living reflections of their surroundings. But the best music of any generation transcends the moment in which it was constructed, serving as a reminder to the past, but also pointing to the future. A faded photograph depicts a WWII-era jazz band, complete with horns, fiddle, banjo, upright bass and drums. The front head of the bass drum is adorned with the words “Dance Band Cabaret,” and from the looks of the gentlemen in the photo, they meant business. The band played hot jazz for dancers, from the likes of Benny Goodman and Glenn Miller. Clutching an alto saxophone in the shot is one Frank Sharpe, native of the Midlands of Derbyshire, England. Frank’s band was based in the area around Nottingham and Leicester, where they won awards for their musical exploits, not least of which was their ability to get a crowd on its feet. Shades of things to come. The legacy of the late Frank Sharpe trickled down to his grandsons, Huntsville’s Antony and Andrew Sharpe, who have been making music in this area for more than 20 years. Antony, or Ant as he is known, is the older brother and is as outspoken, amiable and funny as he is accomplished at his craft. He reflects back to his childhood with grinning enthusiasm: “Growing up in England,” Ant said, “there was always music around. My mother and father were always playing the piano and listening to music. It was a very musical place, our house.” Indeed, the brothers had music on both sides of the family. A “little genius” cousin of Ant and Andrew on their mother’s side, James Bentley, now enjoys success as a composer and has had his compositions performed throughout England and aired on BBC Radio. Antony and Andrew Sharpe were born in the late-1960s and raised in St. Albans, Hertfordshire, a city built atop an old page 6 Roman settlement, just north of London. It was in St. Albans that the brothers first heard what was to be their calling. From an early age, the Sharpe brothers were encouraged to try their hands at music, and London was teeming with the sounds of a new generation. “The radio was always on, and we got a bit of everything there,” Antony said, his slight British brogue lingering. “The first 45 I ever bought was Stevie Wonder’s ‘I Wish,’ which simply fascinated me. Still does.” Picking up the guitar seriously at age 14, Antony began playing along with records, while younger brother Andrew simply sat down at the family piano and started playing as though it was already a part of him. “People forget what brilliant musicians McCartney, Jeff Beck and Bob Dylan are, and that their creations have always risen above the hype that surrounds them,” Antony said, arguing his point. By 1982, the aerospace industry in Huntsville had beckoned for the Sharpes’ father, and the family moved here with the promise of yet another new beginning. “At first, it was a total culture shock for us, and I wasn’t sure about it,” Antony shared. “But this is really the area where rock ‘n’ roll music came from, and I sort of waded in.” Antony began playing with local musicians, among them David Anderson and future Toy Shop drummer Jim Keeling, and discovering new slants on the music he’d grown up with. In an informal such a graceful strength in the art of body manipulation that he was offered a full scholarship to Syracuse University, which he gladly accepted. But after a leg injury sidelined him, he returned south to concentrate on his art and music. In short order, he had moved to Georgia and received a degree from the prestigious Art Institute of Atlanta. Returning to Huntsville, Andrew joined his brother (and, on occasion, Keeling) in a series of musical explorations. By now Andrew was an accomplished pianist and singer, as sound and art collided. “I was particularly taken with Peter Gabriel, not only for his music but for the way he presented it, and it went from there,” Andrew recalled. Andrew Sharpe is a quick wit and an intuitive presence. He speaks softly and chooses his words carefully. But once behind a piano, he becomes ten-feet tall, in complete command of his facilities, and a master musician with equal parts grace and grit. The brothers Sharpe became a fixture of the Huntsville club scene, playing as a duo in smoky confines and as a part of bigger ensembles with some of Huntsville’s greatest musicians, such as Jim Cavender and David Anderson. With this experience honed in the clubs, the duo began writing together, often presenting original compositions right along with their favorites of the day. The duo formed Toy Shop in the early 90s to present some of this material, with a virtual revolving door of sidemen, including the brilliant Huntsville bassist John Onder. The group played a sprinkling of several musics, with healthy doses of British rock and liberal tastes of more homegrown styles. “He’s really the genius of us; he has so much music in him,” Antony said of his younger sibling. Andrew also developed an early interest in visual art and began painting in a highly imaginative style. The brothers’ father, an aerospace engineer, moved the family across the Atlantic from Hertfordshire to Toronto in the mid-1970s, and the boys got a breath of fresh air with the sounds of the new place. “Toronto was really a hotbed of music,” Antony said. “We heard Neil Young and Bob Dylan, and that broke it wide open for me.” The Canadian city was indeed artistically and multiculturally alive, and the sounds Antony heard refined his focus on music. “I absorbed so much there,” he said. By this time, Antony’s passions were music and soccer ... running neck and neck. jam session with Keeling, Antony found his first kindred spirit, a musical soul mate and a lasting friendship. They worked together again over the years, and kept in touch. At the end of his time at Grissom High School, Antony headed to UAH on a full soccer scholarship and started playing music at night in area clubs. Andrew Sharpe, shy, with a dry sense of humor and a brilliant mind, had only dabbled in music and left Huntsville, and the company of his brother and Keeling, to attend a high school in upstate New York to prepare him for a future in gymnastics. Antony’s agile younger brother displayed Of the material they chose to present, Antony said: “Andrew and I were always about not having musical prejudice or worrying about what was considered cool. We liked what we liked because it spoke to us.” Andrew echoed his brother’s sentiments: “We always thought that the wide range of music we played was both a blessing and a curse, because people sometimes like to peg you as a ‘rock’ band or a ‘pop’ continued on page 34 continued from page 4 even just a little bit, this place would be just about perfect, and we shouldn’t go out of our way to advertize this, or we won’t stay that way long. We’re not so large that you are overwhelmed with so many choices that you usually just stay home, but we have enough going on to keep things interesting. Some wonderful music,and finally we have some good restaurants that are not Mexican, Chinese, or southern fried. I also love how there is room here to create excitement; it’s always seemed to me somewhat pointless to work at being artistic and glamorous in a place already overflowing with artistic and glamorous people. But maybe our biggest challenge in the Tennessee Valley is how to keep our community as vibrant and liveable as it is now, avoiding turning into another Atlanta, while still continuing to prosper. Well, I’m being chatty for no particular reason, and I promise not to do this often, but I am inspired after reading your paper for the first time. I really want to compliment you all on being organized and inclusive enough to have all the club listings, a feat that heretofore no one has been able to manage very well, no offense to those who have tried, maybe it just wasn’t the right time. Valley Planet has a good mix of useful information, cultural reporting (great article on local music), good ideas (your editorial about supporting local businesses)and off the wall stuff (that girl scout story!) I actually read most of it, instead of just leafing through and getting bored in three minutes. Also you seem to be environmentally concerned and respectful of everyone without bowing to, or rebelling against, the often ridiculous rules of political correctness. Thanks for publishing “Valley Planet.” Julia Carter, Huntsville Thanks for listing us. You guys have a great magazine. Huntsville needs. Short Bus Just what If you have a band, or if you’re an artist or any struggling creative type, please let us know what you are doing and when, and we’ll find a way to get it in here. Email us at [email protected] or call 858- Brian & Paul at Humphrey’s Just received the copy and tee shirt you sent. Thank you for both. I am overwhelmed with your first issue. I did appreciate the hard copy much more than I could feel warm and fuzzy about the website copy. Very informative and well written. I enjoyed Cherie’s poem and photo. If I ever need an alias, I must use “Ima Nu Ritter”. Huntsville sounds like its rockin, maybe Barb and I should have retired their-not. Love, B&B I don’t want either my business or my music organization’s ads to appear next to bogus bylines such as “Ima Nu Ritter”, “Leigh Pafayth”, or articles denigrating Girl Scouts (good God, at least they are inclusive! Give them a break), or with Ricky Thomason’s rambling column in poor taste about vaginitis and the dentist getting friendly with him. I liked the first issue a lot, and I’m appalled at the second one. I used to live in a city with great free papers that shared your format. I had high hopes for VP: I’m really disappointed. Sincerely, J R Kucinich in 2004. A meeting for the “Kucinich in 2004” Huntsville area volunteers is set for Thursday, Sept. 4 at 7 p.m. in Papa Lovetti‚s restaurant, located at 4710 University Drive. The meeting is open to anyone interested in learning more about Dennis Kucinich and his stand on the issues as he vies for the Democratic nomination for president of the U.S. There is no cost to attend the meeting. For more information, call Linda Haynes, Volunteer meeting host, (256) 489-3884 or email [email protected]. I would like to thank Winton Blount, former chairman of the Alabama Republican Party, for his recruiting on behalf of the Libertarian Party. According to a July 20th report in the Mobile Register, Blount proclaimed that Republicans who oppose the Riley tax increase are “more Libertarian” than Republican and that “They ought to join the Libertarian Party.” Blount supports Republican Governor Bob Riley’s plan to impose the largest tax increase in Alabama history. The Libertarian Party of Alabama welcomes former Republicans-- and others--who want to join a party that is sincere in promoting smaller government and lower taxes. Call 1-800-682-1776 or go to www.al.lp.org/voteno.htm. Alan Barksdale [email protected] FREE Fun at Lincoln County Bluegrass Festival September 26 and 27 Are you looking for something FREE and DIFFERENT to do this fall? Take a ride to Fayetteville, Tenn., enjoy the crisp fall weekend, the sun shinning through your car windows and search out some good tunes. In Fayetteville, you’ll find a charming town chock-full of antiques, unique stores, cozy restaurants and B&Bs galore; and on September 26 and 27, you’ll find the 2nd Annual Lincoln County Bluegrass and Crafts Festival at the Lincoln County Fairgrounds. Take some time to visit the festival, and you’ll want to stay for more. Enjoy all types of bluegrass instrumental and band competitions, and stay for the bluegrass dance competitions, which last year pounded the stage like an American Riverdance. Also, not to be missed is the homemade food: rib-eye sandwiches, ribs, barbeque and more ... all cooked up by community non-profit groups. Don’t forget to schmooze the craft booths, listen to some pickers in the barns and take a carriage ride — if you feel energetic enough, climb the rock wall! The festival has something for everyone. Approximately 5,000 – 7,000 visitors enjoyed the event in 2002. One Nashville attorney wrote with compliments about the wonderful time he and his out-oftown guests had at the festival. The fest also received much praise for being both “down home” and “high caliber and professional.” Be adventurous this September. We promise, you won’t be disappointed. Admission to the Lincoln County Bluegrass and Crafts Festival is FREE! Plenty of free parking outside the gates and only $3 to park inside the gates. RV parking is available on the fairgrounds for a $15 fee. All RV tickets will be entered in a prize drawing. No alcoholic beverages will be allowed inside the fairgrounds; none will be served at the concessions. Gates will open Friday at 3 p.m. and Saturday at 7 a.m. More than $8,000 in prize money will be awarded! For more information or directions, visit www.lincolncountytn.com/bluegrass or call 931-433-8640, 931-433-2510 or The Chamber of Commerce at 931-4331234. The festival is currently accepting craft booth applications & competitor applications. Sorry, all food booths are taken. The Lincoln County Bluegrass Festival is a 5014C non-profit festival. All proceeds (parking, t-shirts, etc.) help fund next year’s event and future arts scholarships. Volunteers and sponsors welcome! SOUTHERLANDS PHOTO Please send us your thoughts. We’ll get as much as we can in here and more at www.valleyplanet.com Email us at [email protected] page 7 By Sharon Jordan A s if there aren’t enough wacky types invading our overcrowded public spaces these days, the Huntsville Botanical Garden is adding to that colorful melee with its annual September through October “Scarecrow Trail” festival. Judging from the past two years’ cast of unbelievable characters, you can expect to expand your preconceived concept of scarecrows from cast off clothes strung up on a couple of sticks, to brilliantly conceived and cleverly engineered arboreal sculpture, a.k.a. yard art. To give creative rein to potential scarecrow builders — and the term “scarecrow” is used loosely — prize categories were revamped this year to include, among others, strangest, scariest, funniest and a judges’ choice category to catch those unbelievably creative efforts that just don’t fit in any other class. Last year that would have included the picture-perfect underwater Sponge Bob Square Pants scene, complete with noodle anemones, and UAH’s “This Scarecrow’s Got a Brain” — well, you just had to be there! Being seasonal creatures, scarecrows are not known for their longevity, but C & J Welding’s scrap metal “Knight and His Mighty Steed” have become permanent fixtures at the Botanical Garden — you just have to wonder what they’re going to come up with this year. Other area businesses really work hard at beating the competition; departments within Crestwood Medical Center even compete with each other — last year, one generously proportioned “nurse” was a real eye-opener! But “Scarecrow Trail” really is a family show; from Oompa Loompas to Harry Potter to the Giant Ladybug, these scarecrows are something really special. Adding to the general pandemonium and good old-fashioned fun at the Botanical Garden are the “Treemendous Treehouses” and the Amazing Sorghum Maze. Thick, green and over 7-feet tall, you almost feel like you’re in some surreal green and rustling world, except for the kids zipping and weaving everywhere and whooping it up. And, how come they always make it out first? Aren’t we supposed to be the intelligent life around here? Not to worry. On weekends you can hop on a hayride to catch your breath and enjoy the sights and sounds of the fall scenery at a more leisurely pace. The Garden is magnificent at this time of year page 8 photos courtesy of Huntsville Botanical Garden with changing leaves and fall plantings painting the landscape in broad sweeps of intense colors. With so much “growing on,” a visit to the Huntsville Botanical Garden is a real family pleaser. The Garden is located at 4747 Bob Wallace Avenue. Garden hours are Monday - Friday 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. and 1 p.m. to 5 p.m. on Sundays. For the full slate of activities, visit www.hsvbg.org or call 256-830-4447. Keys, Locks and Things That Go Honk in the Night By Martha Pendergrass Templeton A few years back, someone who either is or has lived with an obsessive-compulsive person invented the now famous remote control door-lock for the automobile. As one who for some time now has been obsessed with keys and locks, I was thrilled to find that my new van came with one of these trinkets. Now, instead of going out to my van to make sure that it is locked, I simply have to press the button and the horn will sound a reassuring “honk,” which, in modern car language, means, “Oy! You locked it, already!” Or, occasionally, it will answer, “ h o n k , h o n k , ” translated, “You locked it, but some schlemiel left the door open.” All of this information I can get from the comfort of my own home, and I don’t have to obsess over whether I locked the keys in the car or not, as I always lock it from the outside now. A brilliant invention! What the inventor failed to consider, though, was the fact that the obsessivecompulsive locker is still obsessivecompulsive and might annoy those around her with her incessant honking. Sometimes I am halfway to the house and I wonder, “Did I hear the horn honk?” I don’t remember. So I honk it again, just to be sure. And, just as a precaution, each night before I go to bed, I walk to the window and honk the horn goodnight. It is a sickness, but what am I to do? Besides all the checking, I am a counter too. I don’t necessarily count things I hear, so much as I count things I do. Steps … just counting my steps as I walk, particularly walking up or down stairs. One, two, three, four, six and I’m in the living room. Kisses. My husband will kiss me several times, thinking, I am sure, that we are both caught up in the ecstasy of it all; and just as he pulls away to gaze into my eyes, expecting some wonderful, romantic phrase, I invariably say something like, “Six kisses.” I don’t know why. I just have to count them. Maybe I watched too much “Sesame Street” growing up. I still check and double check the front door and constantly reach to my pocket to check and recheck to see that my keys are there. I check the stove too, but not as much as the lock. (Probably because I go out more than I cook.) Maybe someday I will be able to purchase a keyless remote for all the doors in my house, and perhaps a miniscule version for my diary. Then I can lie in bed at night and press buttons as everything I hold dear honks goodnight to me, and the neighbors (and perhaps my husband and son) either begin to count the honks with me or plan some extravagant way of getting rid of me and all my remote controls. German Beverages, Music, Fun & Dance. Games & Rides for all ages! Parking, Rides and Entertainment Included! Redstone Arsenal has the Best 'Fest west of Germany! Festival Times 7-10 pm 7pm-midnite 6pm-midnite 2-6 pm My friend, Debra, refers to her O-C behaviors as “ritualized behaviors,” and I am thinking of adopting the term in hopes that it would at least make me sound more sane. Perhaps I should have foregone the purchase of the keyless entry devices and just invested in a lifetime of therapy instead. Martha Templeton is an author, teacher and storyteller. Her story, “Simple Wooden Boxes,” published in “A Fourth Course of Chicken Soup for the Soul” and in the “Chicken Soup for the Soul Christmas Treasury” was the basis for a television short used in the “Chicken Soup for the Soul” television series. Email her at [email protected]. page 9 2003 MOVA Arts Festival by Jennie McBride J The 2003 MOVA Arts Festival, to be held Sept. 18–21 in Guntersville, offers a lot for musicians and songwriters. Along with an international songwriters’ competition, a visual arts component and activities for children, the festival also gives musicians and songwriters a chance to study under and interact with music professionals from throughout Alabama and Tennessee when they attend the MOVA 2003 Musicians’ Conference. The list of professionals who are slated to give workshops, master classes and participate in panel discussions is impressive, including platinum-sales songwriters, music publishers, studio owners and executives of songwriters and musicians groups. C hris Gantry became a member of the inner circle of Nashville songwriting in the early ‘60s by penning over 70 songs that have been recorded by country and pop stars, including Johnny Cash, Reba McEntire, Roy Clark, Robert Goulet and Glen Campbell. He wrote the cross-over hit “Dreams of the Everyday Housewife,” earning the Nashville Songwriters Award and three awards from the performing rights organization BMI in 1963. R Participants can take classes and/or private coaching sessions from the following music professionals: ussell Gulley is a blues and rock musician, songwriter, bass player and vocalist who played with Jackson Highway. He has played with many blues and rock stars and is a featured artist of the Alabama State Council on the Arts Artist Touring Guide. Gulley has been an artist-in-residence in several school systems and has experience in production and artist development. K D im Copeland is a performing songwriter, publisher, producer, teacher and author of “The Songwriter’s Little Book of Big Thoughts” and “The Writer’s Goal Book” (with Susan Tucker) and is co-owner of Sage House Music and Journey Publishing Company. B rian Evans holds a doctorate in music composition from the University of Illinois and is currently on the art faculty at the University of Alabama. amon Johnson, whose rock group Brother Cane released three albums on Virgin Records with three number one singles. He wrote and did guitar work for Sammy Hagar’s “Marching to Mars” and was a member of Damn Yankees with Ted Nugent. Johnson penned “Every Day,” recorded by Fleetwood Mac vocalist Stevie Nicks. He played all the guitar on Faith Hill’s smash hit single “Cry.” He is currently writing and recording with his new band, Red Halo, and performs occasionally with legendary rock vocalist John Waite as lead guitarist. A Celebration of Creative Arts September 18-21 Civitan Park F E A T U R I N G Located in Beautiful Lake Guntersville, AL MOVA 2003 Songwriter/Composer Competition All genres, $4,000 in cash awards Lakeside Arts District Exhibits & Demonstrations of fine, vanishing & folkarts & crafts The “Village Voice” Showcase of area talent in acoustic music, story, dance, etc Musician’s ’ Conference “The Art & Business of Music” Kid’s ’ Art Park Art, Music, Food & Fun for the Whole Family call (256) 582-1454 or visit http://MOVA.mountainvalleyartscouncil.org page 10 im Parker is a songwriter, vocalist, and guitar player who has performed professionally throughout 43 states with studio mastering, songwriting and production experience in Amarillo, Texas; Clovis, N.M.; Los Angeles, Calif.; San Jose, Calif.; Nashville, Tenn.; and Huntsville, Ala. He won the 1978 ASCAP Songwriter’s Award for “I’ve Got A Feelin’,” recorded by John Anderson on Warner Brothers Records. Parker also received a 1981 BMI Songwriter’s Award for “Chicken Truck,” also recorded by John Anderson on Warner Brothers Records. This song reached #8 in the nation on the Billboard country charts and is on John Anderson’s first Greatest Hits album. R undi Ream is the southern regional director of the Songwriters’ Guild of America. She works in Nashville and is a specialist in artists and songwriters’ copyrighting issues. She has served on many judges panels and has given workshops and seminars on songwriting. C S J P asey Kelly is experienced in many areas of the music/songwriting business. He has worked as a studio musician, written songs for major-label projects and worked for record companies. He toured with Tom Rush (playing guitar, keyboard and harmonica), and he currently performs as a singer/songwriter. He is a board member of the Songwriters’ Guild of America. Kelly wrote Grammy nominated songs “Anyone Who Isn’t Me Tonight” and “Soon,” as well as many other songs recorded by such artists as Helen Reddy, Don Gant, Kenny Rogers and Dottie West, George Strait and many others. anet McLaughlin majored in classical guitar and is a songwriter who has worked with the Nashville Songwriters’ Association and the Country Music Foundation at Camp Summersong. McLaughlin has performed with the Indigo Girls, whose voices are on one of her compositions on her CD Dancing. An integral member of Nashville’s music community, McLaughlin has appeared at selective clubs and has gained the attention of fellow musicians and music industry professionals. She also performs in local benefit concerts where she shares the stage with such artists as Emmylou Harris, Roseanne Cash, John Hartford and John Prine. J im McNeil won first place in Folk/ Blues, third place in Soft Rock, and Best Love Song awards at the 2002 MOVA Arts Festival. He has won awards in many songwriting competitions, including first place at the Chris Austin Songwriting Contest, MerleFest. He coproduced an album of children’s songs, Kidfolk, in 1986 and released his first solo album, Slow Circles, in 1984. He was selected for Kerrville Folk Festival New Folk Artist five times from 1989–2001. McNeil is the owner of Front Porch Music Publishing and Alchemy Records. He holds a degree in marketing from the University of Southern Mississippi. usan Tucker is a songwriter, music publisher, teacher and author of “The Soul of a Writer” and “The Writer’s Goal Book” (with Kim Copeland). Her new book, “Secrets of Songwriting” (Allworth Press), was due for a July 2003 release. Tucker has been a guest lecturer at Berklee School of Music and teaches workshops for NSAI, NCSA and other songwriting organizations all over the country. She co-authored the lesson plan used by over 100 regional workshops of the Nashville Songwriters Association International. She is co-owner of Sage House Music Publishing and a member of ASCAP, NSAI and NARAS. at Upton wrote “I Love You More Today than Yesterday,” and the song still ranks number 50 in the top 100 Favorite of all Times. He was recognized in January 2003 by the Alabama Music Hall of Fame with the America Music Award. He is a former member of the Spiral Starecase band and was also a back-up singer for Ricky Nelson. These music professionals offer a wide range of workshops, master classes and panel discussions, including topics such as Elements of Professional Songwriting, Lead Guitar Techniques, Graphic Design Basics for Musicians, The Ins and Outs of Contracts, The Creative Process, Overcoming Musician’s Block, and Harmony Basics: Understanding Chords. Individual Coaching sessions are also available with some of the professionals. Classes range from 45-minute panel discussions to 4-hour master classes. Fees range from $15 to $75. A special weekend rate is available for $175. Prior registration is strongly encouraged. After September 1, registrations will be taken, space permitting, with a $20 late registration fee. You can avoid the late registration fee by identifying yourself as a Valley Planet reader! For more information on the Musicians’ Conference, contact the Mountain Valley Arts Council at 256-582-1454 or e-mail [email protected]. Information may also be found on the web at http:// MOVA.MountainValleyArtsCouncil.org. Married … Yet? by Allison Gregg There’s nothing more annoying than that dreaded question every single person older than 25 gets: “So, you’re not married yet?” I’ve been “fortunate” enough to get it in several forms. Upon hearing that I would be a bridesmaid, someone said to me, “That’s how many times now?” She didn’t have to say it. I knew what she was saying. I don’t know what answer they’re fishing for when they throw those comments out. Even worse, I can’t come up with a quick, funny answer to let them know they should just shove it — I don’t want to be married. For the longest time, I thought I had made it through my twenties without hearing those comments. The first time I heard it I was, of all places, on a bus in Australia. “A pretty girl like you, not married,” the Aussie bus driver commented. “No,” I replied with a smile, “not yet.” When some people realize I’m not married, I feel like they think it’s their duty to remind me that I should be married by now. “Not married? Didn’t you get the memo? You’re supposed to get married! Then you can buy a house!! Then you can have kids!!! And maybe a dog!!!! Then there’re crappy diapers, daycare, carpool, football and teaching your kids about puberty. Then they turn into teens with atrocious attitudes and finally go off to college, only to leave you and your spouse to just look at each other and ask, ‘Now what?’” Is marriage the ultimate mecca? Is it the end-all, be-all? I’ve heard more antimarriage statements from married people than I’ve heard single people wishing to get married. I’ve sat at more luncheons than I care to count with married women who drone on and on about their husband’s inability to dress, clean, sleep silently or flush. And the moment they realize I’m not sailing on the “Married Folks Only Ship,” they comment that “don’t worry, you’ll see.” I simply smile and think to myself, “Or maybe I won’t.” What if I never get married? What if I never find the one? What if he already came into my life and is long gone? What if my parent’s divorce screwed me up so much that intense therapy will never cure my independent ways? Am I a horrible person because I didn’t get the memo? Or, if it did show up, I had more important things to do than read it, let alone believe it. In this modern age when women can hold high political offices, edit newspapers, direct movies and follow their hearts, why are they looked upon as incomplete if they’re not married? If I were to be miserably married, would that be better than being a smitten single? At a social event the other night some one asked me if I was John’s other half, and I smiled and replied, “Oh no, I’m my own whole.” That is the best reply I’ve come up with to date. And fortunately, it’s the truth. When not solving the world’s problems on her lunch break, Allison Gregg can be found running (not working) <<that might be questionable...>> the streets of South Huntsville getting ready for the next big race. Her hobbies include spending time with friends and her large and loving family, searching for good food and great wine and avoiding any form of commitment. page 11 Reviews Print by Ricky Thomason Seven Days & Seven Sins A Novel in Short Stories by Pamela Ditchoff Areheart Books, New York, NY 226 pages, Hardcover, $23.00 “S even Days & Seven Sins,” the critically acclaimed second novel by Michigan author Pamela Ditchoff, is a novel told in 14 imaginative short stories. Each story stands alone, but Ditchoff’s skill weaves them into an intricate tapestry of color and touch. Arnie the dwarf marries a woman who is as neurotic as she is beautiful. From her Lansing, Michigan, neighborhood, Ms. Ditchoff graciously consented to talk with the Valley Planet about her new work. VP: We love the concept of short stories “Seven Days” is the tale of the Lantern Hill neighborhood and the unique characters who dwell there. The group, all misfits in their own way, have an unknown but powerful influence on each other’s lives. Arnie the dwarf marries a woman who is as neurotic as she is beautiful. Her pantry holds a terrifying shadow of pain. A woman blooms into a beauty of her own with her beloved exotic orchids. Another lives alone and reverts to living on all fours. There is a heart-ripping portrait of a leukemia victim’s last hunting trip, followed by the story of the wrenching effects on his widow and young son. Story by story, the characters interact, each going their own way, yet altering the trajectory of their neighbors’ lives. The cohesive element in the novel is Angela Mayfair, a Millennium Extrasensory Evolution Kid. She sees through walls and into hearts and minds. The daughter of a gay, bulimic man, Angela recognizes people’s pain and difficulties. She is keenly aware of life’s problems and is a compassionate observer who doesn’t interfere. This can be said of both Angela and the author. page 12 as novel chapters. It’s a fresh approach to break the old taboo of multiple points of view in a book. How did you come up with the concept? Ditchoff: I had several of the stories when I started the book. The idea evolved from a book of stories to a novel of related stories when it occurred to me that all of the stories took place in one neighborhood. I know short stories are said to be harder to write than novels, but I found this approach very freeing. VP: The woman who is a crow is a wonderful image, the black jogging suit, the yellow shoes, hands on hips like wings, cawing her husband’s name, “Cal! Cal! Cal!” Ditchoff: Thank you. Harriet and Calvin were some of my favorites, too. I know Harriet, the crow woman, but her identity isn’t for publication. VP: If it’s an “If I tell you, I’ll have to kill you” kind of thing, we don’t want to know. I think all writers draw their characters from the people around them, and that often puts neighbors and family in the sights. Ditchoff: They are the people we know best — or think we do. Long ago, people got to know their neighbors by necessity. Now, you can live somewhere for decades and never know those living closest to you. From the glimpses you get of most of them, you aren’t sure you even want to know what they do, what they are really about. That’s why it was so much fun to have Angela know her neighbors and their stories. VP: I guess if we really knew what lurks next door, we’d want to move. In “Pride, The Fourth Sin,” the idea that marijuana literally saved the character’s life in Vietnam is striking. Ditchoff: The story of the helicopter door gunner and the temple ball hash was written pretty much as it was told to me by my brother, years after he returned from the war. VP: And in the war he was a … ? Ditchoff: Door gunner. VP: On that note, we thank you. It reminds us that we are overdue for our life saving appointment. Ricky Thomason is a freelance writer from Huntsville. Email Rick at [email protected]. Reviews Cinema by Cody Roy MTV’SREALWORLDELMSTREET I t’s been a sizzling summer of fizzling sequels. And as we switch gears for the fall, Hollywood’s parade of Part Twos peters out. But before the music dies, a straggler shows up: the supersequel scuffle, “Freddy Vs. Jason.” In 1993, “Jason Goes to Hell” culminated with Freddy clawing his way up from the nether world and snatching Jason’s mask. Though it may seem subtle, this moment rocked the “horrorati” because it meant their fantasy clash might someday come about. It was the tiniest trailer, a single drop of blood heralding the three hundred gallons that would be shed a decade later. It seems odd, however, that a movie with such rabid fans was placed under the direction of Ronny Yu, whose greatest achievement had been “Bride of Chucky.” And even more puzzling was the casting. Should we really be comforted by the fact that the fates of our waking and sleeping lives rest in the hands of a Dawson’s Creek-ette, John Ritter’s son and Beyoncé Knowles’ backup singer? Elm Street parents have been administering a dream suppressant to their children for years, so today’s teenagers have no idea who Freddy Krueger was, leaving him powerless. Desperate, he recruits Jason to visit these kids and reestablish enough terror so that he can sneak back into their sleep cycles. One oversight — once Jason reacquires his taste for blood, he refuses to leave. A turf war ensues. Not only is the cast comprised of MTV’s Real World-esque stereotypes (the pretty, naive girl; the sensitive, cute guy; and the surly, African-American home-girl — to name a few), but the acting is equally Freddy flings Jason Flubberstyle around his boiler room instance, engages Freddy in an “oh-noshe-didn’t” snap battle: she insults his “Christmas sweater” and argues that his claws are compensation for a certain shortcoming. In another Oscar moment, a Jason Mewes clone hits a bong with caterpillar Freddy. And in yet one more scene destined to split Academy votes, Freddy flings Jason Flubber-style around his boiler room, accompanied by pinball sound effects. “FVJ” has a sadness that has less to do with the “evil” ones failing to shake forty years of collective rust from their blades and more to do with the fact that this is no longer a horror franchise. It’s a spoof of itself. This sequel could easily pass for another: “Scary Movie 4.” one-dimensional. As the two supernatural slashers lock blades to determine who will kill them, these teen spectators are either over-emotive or too subdued. In their defense, however, the dialogue doesn’t lend itself to Academy Award-caliber performances. To appeal to today’s hip hop-heavy culture, the screenwriters apparently consulted Snoop Dogg. “Freddizzle” finds himself punctuating every statement with “B#@*%!” Maybe it’s time for Hollywood to swallow handfuls of sequel suppressants. And if we’re lucky, the passage of time will forever erase this waste of film from memory. What’s left of your summer cents would be better spent going to see a man (Tobey Maguire) about a horse (“Seabiscuit”). This movie is laughably, insultingly bad. A few scenes, in fact, are nearly unwatchable. Kelly Rowland, for Cody Roy is a freelance writer currently residing in Huntsville. Email your comments to [email protected]. page 13 Last Chance. Vote Yes or Forever Hold Your Peace By Bryan Thames I f all people were born in the geographic center of the United States and then given a choice as to where they wanted to live, how many people would choose to live in Alabama? Why do we live here? If you’re like me, you live here because you were born and raised here. We had no choice. But look at a map, admire the vastness of the United States and look at Alabama. Recognize what all fifty states have to offer: mountains, fossil fuels, beaches and climate. Alabama has lots of these things, but it isn’t the prettiest place in the world. Given Alabama’s past as the center for backwards thinking, our pathetic school system and our history of keeping poor people poor and the rich, rich, Alabama does not rank nationally as a great state to move to. when trust means pulling out our check books and giving the ol’ state of Alabama what it justly deserves, more money. But I am going to vote for the governor’s tax plan, not because I trust Riley a great deal or particularly like him, but because I’m sick of waiting. I’m sick of Alabama being last in everything. And, like many of you, I live here and have done so for my entire life; I am not anti-Alabama. I’m just down on it right now because I see so much that we as Alabamians have to offer, One friend, when asked about Riley’s tax plan, said, “I don’t know. Why don’t they just legalize marijuana and tax the hell out of it?” I laughed and then I thought, ingenious. It’s the number one cash crop in every state in the Southeast. It’s not going anywhere. We are never going to win that war. Why? Because it makes too much money. If Alabama wants to take a bold step to raise money for the state, that is an interesting idea. Why is that? It’s because Alabama doesn’t have any money. We haven’t had any in a long time. All the cool things that are going on next door in Georgia can’t happen here because we don’t have enough money. And that isn’t because we don’t have a lottery; it’s because Alabama is the cheapest state to live in of all in the whole United States. I’m still paying for my college education because we haven’t had a governor who was capable of bringing enough money to Alabama to pay for higher education. Some people would say, “You’re right, but every governor of Alabama has been You don’t want to give more money to the government when you live in the state that ranks last in almost everything. a complete and total jackass. I wouldn’t give my money to any of them.” And this is how the majority of Alabamians feel. You don’t want to give more money to the government when you live in the state that ranks last in almost everything. The number one reason for that is that we don’t trust that person whom the majority of the state voted for, and we never will page 14 yet we’re not because we can’t change. And no change means no improvement. I’m going to vote for this bill because I don’t want to wait three years for another elected official try to do what no one seems to be capable of, improving the quality of life in Alabama. To further instill in the minds of Alabamians that this plan is needed, Riley should have gone ahead and cut the budget on all the little things we’ve become so accustomed to in this state, like high school football programs and Medicaid money for old folks. All of a sudden your one-high-school town doesn’t have a football program anymore and your ninety-two-year-old father lives in your living room. Then, and only then, people might finally realize what’s going on and say, “Shit, I guess Alabama could use some more money.” When Nevada became a state, nobody wanted to live there, so they made divorces legal, then prostitution and then gambling. Alabama doesn’t need to do these things. We are not a desert, but we do need money. Perhaps prostitutes and gambling could raise money for this great state. Another idea would be to release a bunch of prisoners, particularly those who are in jail for minor drug offenses, which is roughly 70 percent of the prison population, and send the extra money to schools instead of housing and feeding these folks. Though these ideas may seem bogus to the average Alabamian and even to the average American, that is my point. In order to radically change and improve the quality of life in Alabama, drastic measures must be taken. All Riley is asking is that we pay for what we are asking for. We don’t have to legalize marijuana, or cut high school football programs, or cut Medicaid or release prisoners to the street — but we do need to give more to get more. And that is all this man is asking for. I commend him for it. Asking the State of Alabama to considerably raise its taxes is a bold move. The fact that Riley is a Republican and is about to tax the hell out of the powerful, wealthy folks here takes balls and is an even bolder move. I like that in a governor, especially in a state that seems almost destined to remain at the bottom of the barrel. My girlfriend told me the other day that she had heard a complaint from a woman who owned three houses in Alabama. The woman said that she would not be able to afford her three homes if the tax plan passes. I’m sorry to say that yes, if you do happen to own three houses in Alabama, you will pay more in taxes. One beauty of Alabama’s current tax system is that right now it is cheap to own and maintain more than one house. But let us now, just for a second, think about those who live in Alabama and do not have a house, who do not own vacation homes, who never received a good education. Let’s think about who this tax will benefit, how this money can improve our state and the lives of Alabamians, and let’s take a step and vote yes on September 9 and improve the quality of life for everyone who lives in Alabama. With this tax plan, families who make $4,600 a year (the current threshold) will no longer have to pay income taxes. Students who have a B average in high school and receive a 20 on the ACT will not have to pay for higher education. Alabama will no longer be in debt, but instead has a chance to be a thriving state, maybe even the greatest in the nation. Bryan Thames, free-lance writer and Huntsville resident. SEND YOUR COMMENTS TO [email protected] VOTE YES, VOTE NO, JUST VOTE. TAX QUOTES FOR THE PLANET Monte Sano Art Show to be held on September 20 SEND YOUR COMMENTS TO [email protected] “It’s hard to remember when less than one hundred words could so greatly affect educational funding in Alabama. Many voters know education must improve here (the old adage — you get what you pay for?), but most people do not trust the legislature’s management of the additional funds. So, how do we vote on September 9th?” Dixie Bray “Amendment One is the beginning of fair taxation for the citizen’s of Alabama. Although Amendment One does not address all taxation problems, it gives us the opportunity to begin the process.” Representative Laura Hall Alabama House of Representatives District 19 – Madison County “I have grown to love Governor Riley, pompadour and all, and believe that HE believes his plan is the best thing for Alabama. If Governor Riley had complete control of where the tax plan’s money would be spent, more people would vote yes. But, most of us just can’t fathom giving a BILLION dollars to the very people that got our state in this mess to begin with!” Darla Jaye Radio Talk Show Host 770 WVNN SEND YOUR COMMENTS TO [email protected] Monte Sano will be celebrating the arts at the 5th annual outdoor Monte Sano Art Show held atop Monte Sano Mountain on Saturday, September 20 from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. More than 80 artists and craftspeople from the southeast will be exhibiting and selling their works. Admission is free. Guests will enjoy the original works of art as well as live music, food and the wonderful views of the Tennessee Valley! In addition to the artists’ booths, there will be artist demonstrations throughout the day. Georgine Clarke of the Alabama Council for the Arts will jury this invitational show. Local artist Debra Simpson conceived the art show. Debra believes the outdoor beauty of Monte Sano in the fall is a perfect place to view excellent art. She remembers one of the first southeastern outdoor shows called “Plum Nellie” held on the border of Tennessee and Georgia near Chattanooga. It became an annual pilgrimage for art enthusiasts. Debra wants a tradition to continue here on Monte Sano. She has sought out key artists from all over the southeast. Debra is an oil painter and teaches painting in her Monte Sano studio. Her works have been shown internationally and have won awards at the French-USA competition in portraiture. Demonstrating artists will include Danny Hoskinson of Benton, Tennessee (better own tiles from found everyday ceramics. His daughter Emily, a nationally recognized artist whose works are also included in the permanent collection of the Huntsville Museum of Art, will be exhibiting her new techniques in glass. Also, Helen Howie will assemble some of her artistic lamps and lampshades. Helen is a local artisan living on Monte Sano who uses mixed media and found objects to create wonderful lamps. Many of her lamps are commissioned to include objects meaningful to the owner. Daniel Hessler from Gurley, Alabama, is a stone sculptor. Many of his works are in jade. His jade knives have been exhibited all over the southeast. He will be demonstrating with his foot treadle stonecutter. Daniel also works in other precious stones and in wood. Jack Dempsey, former professor of art at UAH, will demonstrate an approach to oil painting that is called “light oils.” This ancient technique uses oils in a water color technique such that the light of the canvas is used as the light in the painting. Jack often invites attendees to experiment with him. Musicians will perform throughout the day, including among others, the contradance duo Katrina and Chuck Weber, as well as Phil Weaver, a local classical guitarist, and the large percussive Bill Wilson at last year’s festival known as “the bucket man”). He will be demonstrating his technique in direct application plastic sculpture. Danny’s plastic welding work has been on display at the Kentuck Art Show and the Houston Museum of Art. Bill Wilson, who is also an internationally acclaimed writer, will be demonstrating his mosaic works. The technique he uses is called “Pique Assiette,” which is a style of mosaics in which the artist makes his group Rhythm for the Savage Masses. New on the scene this year will be Coty Cockrell, a college-student pianist who won the Louis Armstrong Jazz Award. Follow the signs on Monte Sano to enjoy this wonderful event on September 20. For information online, visit www.montesanoartshow.org. page 15 Business Leaders See Wet/Dry Issue Great Opportunity for Athens Future T he legal sale of alcohol has been at the forefront of debate in Athens and Limestone County for the past two decades. After several attempts by the City and County, they both remain “dry” entities. However, in June, various business leaders in the city of Athens formed an organization they named Citizens for Economic Progress. The group’s mission is to act as a thought leadership organization that focuses on local issues that affect the Athens economy. T he organization adopted three initial projects in its first meeting. The first of which was promoting a petition for the people’s right to vote on the legalized sale of alcohol in Athens and Limestone County. The petition drive by the organization ended by receiving the signatures required for an Athens referendum. On July 29, CFEP presented petitions to the Athens city clerk to call for a municipal option on the legalized sale of alcohol. The group centralized on the legal sales issue for two reasons, according to CFEP Executive Director Brandon Byrd. “When we began looking at our local economy, we saw the erosion of Athens tax revenue due to its inability to offer consumers a demanded product — that being alcoholic beverages. CFEP understood that in order for the local economy to move forward, the alcohol issue had to be addressed,” Byrd said. The organization has released economic impact data that shows Athens generating an additional $1.3 million in new tax revenue and an overall economic stimulus of $27 million. The wet/dry issue possesses other dynamics than economic growth. According to CFEP, legal sales will offer a regulated environment that will disable bootleggers from selling to underage consumers. CFEP Board Director Lakin Collins had this to say: “History should teach us a lesson about prohibition. The 18th Amendment of national prohibition, which was rescinded nearly 13 years later, was one of the worst social and economic periods in U.S. history. Not only did crime increase at a staggering rate, but alcohol consumption did as well.” The organization points to several instances that prove that history repeats itself. CFEP Vice Chairman Joe Johnson said: “When in 2001, Limestone County, which is dry, leads the state of Alabama in alcohol related fatalities, something is wrong. It is clear that prohibiting the sale of alcohol has an adverse effect on alcohol consumption and alcohol related crime.” The wet/dry referendum in Athens will be held on September 9. CFEP is working to educate Athens consumers of the issues involving legalized sales. The organization wants to communicate that unless the Athens economy is able to flow in a free manner, dollars for important services, including schools and infrastructure, will dwindle. The group emphasizes that the time has come for Athens residents to make the right decision for current and future generations. Two other projects were adopted by CFEP. The second project is observing the feasibility of a metro government for Athens-Limestone County, and the third proect is formulating a strategy on informing and educating consumers on keeping tax dollars local. email [email protected] page 16 Calendar Hey Guys, Keep those CALENDAR dates rolling in. If we don’t get your calendar, we can’t put it in the Planet. MUSIC THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 4 ACOUSTIC CAFÉ at SISTER GOOCH Jim Parker hosts Songwriters in the Round featuring Mickey Buckins, Donny Lowery and Scott Boyer BENCHWARMER College Night - DJ HUMPHREY’S Hot Rod Otis. Just a good, solid rocking band! No rock-star attitudes here. This is one party band! See you there! MARTINI’S Live Acoustic Music OL’ BREWTAHN Robby Hutto ROCKABILLY’S Jimmy Ganzburg & Larry Lee 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s Venus Model Search with Hogg Mtn. Lugg Nuts TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Dave Anderson THE CORNER Tom Cremeens - Electric Rock & Alternative THE CROSSROADS The Snake Doctors THE SPORTS PAGE 5ive O’clock Charlie THIRD BASE GRILL Edgar TIP TOP CAFÉ JackLegg (NO COVER. One of the best cover bands in the area doing 60’s, 70’s. & 80’s rock) FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 5 BENCHWARMER Elgin Fikes BOBBY G’s University Damn Skippy FURNITURE FACTORY The Scratch Band HARD DOCK CAFE, Decatur Big Daddy Kingfish HUMPHREY’S Pla’ Station! You had better bring an extra pair of dancing shoes with you because this band is going to funk you up! MARTINI’S Live Music - TBA OL’ BREWTAHN Tom Cremeens ROCKABILLY’S Jim Cavendar, 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s Southern Girls TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Absylom Rising THE CORNER Dave Anderson - Electric & Acoustic Rock, Alternative & Originals THE CROSSROADS Old Crow Medicine Show - a young five-piece rollicking, punkified old-time acoustic band. They give old music new life...a foot stomping, hard driving, stand-up-and-shout-about-it-life. THE END ZONE T.A., Curtis & Pat THE SPORTS PAGE XIII TIP TOP CAFÉ Short Bus & Push (High energy rock you’ll recognize that makes you wanna dance) WESTSIDE CAFÉ Decatur Good Fortune Ceilidh Band. Irish – Scottish Traditional Tunes. 8 pm SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 6 BENCHWARMER Black Label - a highenergy, straightforward, rock-n-roll band BOBBY G’s University Damn Skippy FURNITURE FACTORY Hot Rod Otis HARD DOCK CAFE, Decatur The Scratch Band HUMPHREY’S Reggae Mystics, This is the real deal, folks. The Reggae Mystics are one of the most authentic in all the land. Come check out their new drummer! Continued on the next page page 17 SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 7 HUMPHREY’S Jay Wilson & Alan Little: The Dog & Pony Show. Every Sunday this month!! The best piano - guitar duo in the southeastern U.S. If you disagree, please call me and tell me who is. 256-990-2001 TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Ant & Andrew THE CORNER Scott Morgan - Great Guitarist - Plays 60’s Rock to Current Alternative THE CROSSROADS Movie Night - Film showing and local live music! THE SPORTS PAGE Poker Face MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 8 HUMPHREY’S TBA. Probably Lacy Atchison. Not sure, yet. Maybe Pat Morris. Call and give us your vote. 990-2001! THE CORNER Dave Anderson - Electric & Acoustic, Rock, Alternative & Originals THE CROSSROADS Jim Cavender & Jonathan Giles host “The Monday Night Roots Review” Open Mic THE SPORTS PAGE Jason Albert TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 9 HUMPHREY’S JACKD featuring Johnny Neel of the Allman Bros. & Gov’t Mule and Victor Wooten’s drummer, Derico Watson! Experience JACKD for yourself. You’ll be glad you did. ROCKABILLY’S Dave Anderson, 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s Edwin McCain TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Toy Shop THE CORNER Scott Morgan - Great Guitarist - Plays 60’s Rock to Current Alternative THE CROSSROADS Jay Wilson & Alan Little THE SPORTS PAGE Donny Cox TIP TOP CAFÉ Open Mic (Join some of the area’s best singers/songwriters as they show their talents) (Singers songwriters wanted) WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 10 BENCHWARMER Crazy-N-Sia FURNITURE FACTORY Big Daddy Kingfish Acoustical HUMPHREY’S Eric Rhodes Band. Super special treat!! ERB will be here every Wednesday in September! You’re welcome. See you there! MARTINI’S Karaoke OL’ BREWTAHN Jason Albert ROCKABILLY’S Tom Cremeens, 6 - 10 pm TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Reese THE CORNER Andrew Sharpe - Keyboards and Acoustic Rock and Alternative THE CROSSROADS The Merman THE SPORTS PAGE Pla’ Station, Ladies Night THIRD BASE GRILL 5ive O’clock Charlie FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 12 BENCHWARMER The Land BOBBY G’s University Haze FURNITURE FACTORY The Scratch Band HARD DOCK CAFE, Decatur Hot Rod Otis HUMPHREY’S Andy J. Forest. One of New Orleans’ finest and most energetic performers! One Humphrey’s best acts. Do not miss!! MARTINI’S Live Music - TBA OL’ BREWTAHN Tom Cremeens ROCKABILLY’S Keating Johns, 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s RadioDaze TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Chinese Dentist THE CORNER Dave Anderson - Electric & Acoustic Rock, Alternative & Originals THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 11 MUSIC Continued from page 17 JELLO ROOM “G.I.D.” Long awaited return of drummer Doug Sylvia (and others) to the Huntsville music scene. Come out and rock to some awesome originals and great covers! MARTINI’S Live Music - TBA OL’ BREWTAHN Robby Hutto ROCKABILLY’S Andy Clark & Jimmy G, 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s The Velcro Pygmies TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Lacy & Dave THE CORNER Lisa Busler - Acoustic, Folk Rock and Originals THE CROSSROADS Guy Smiley Blues Exchange THE SPORTS PAGE Sister Luck TIP TOP CAFÉ Skeeters (Rockabilly at it’s best, opens regularly for Willie Nelson on tour) page 18 ACOUSTIC CAFÉ at SISTER GOOCH Jim Parker hosts Songwriters in the Round featuring Debi Champion, Tony Lang and Tom Fedora BENCHWARMER College Night - DJ FURNITURE FACTORY Steven Mertz HUMPHREY’S Black Eyed Susan. Finally!! They’re here!! Don’t miss their Humphrey’s debut! September just keeps getting better & better. Read on! MARTINI’S Live Acoustic Music OL’ BREWTAHN Robby Hutto ROCKABILLY’S Ant & Andrew, 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s Venus Model Search with Juice TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Dave Anderson THE CORNER Tom Cremeens - Electric Rock & Alternative THE CROSSROADS The Snake Doctors THE SPORTS PAGE 5ive O’clock Charlie THIRD BASE GRILL Edgar TIP TOP CAFÉ The PB Army (Join one of the hottest bands on tour out of Ohio for a night of Alternative Rock) THE CROSSROADS Vallejo and Universal Joint THE END ZONE T.A., Curtis & Pat THE SPORTS PAGE Black Label - a highenergy, straightforward, rock-n-roll band SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 13 BENCHWARMER Lonesome Moe BOBBY G’s University Haze FURNITURE FACTORY Absylom Rising HARD DOCK CAFE, Decatur Short Bus, 8: 30 - 12:30. A Great Mix of Dance, Funk and Classic R&B - A Big Yellow Party on Wheels HUMPHREY’S Microwave Dave & the Nukes. The atomic electric master, himself!! We’ll see you here! JELLO ROOM Band TBA MARTINI’S Live Music - TBA OL’ BREWTAHN Robby Hutto QUAIL RUN FARM MUSIC FESTIVAL Old Crow Medicine Show, Snake Doctors and The Dog & Pony Show. Noon ‘til Sunday camping encouraged ROCKABILLY’S Max Russell, 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s Venus Mission TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Robby Hutto THE CORNER Hashbrown - Great Party Band! Classic Rock - bring your shakers!! THE CROSSROADS Live Music - TBA THE SPORTS PAGE Pla’ Station TIP TOP CAFÉ JackLegg (One of the best cover bands in the area. 60’s, 70’s, 80’s) SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 14 Check out where Tom Cremeens is playing here and at www.valleyplanet.com HUMPHREY’S Jay Wilson & Alan Little: The Dog & Pony Show. After that last week, we all need a little breather. There’s no better way I can think of than to sit back, relax and groove out with Alan & Jay. Whew! TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Ant & Andrew THE CORNER Scott Morgan - Great Guitarist - Plays 60’s Rock to Current Alternative THE CROSSROADS Movie Night - Film showing and local live music! THE SPORTS PAGE Poker Face THE SPORTS PAGE 5ive O’clock Charlie THIRD BASE GRILL Edgar TIP TOP CAFÉ Local Orbit (Local alternative rock that you don’t need to miss. College scene favorite) FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 19 MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 15 HUMPHREY’S Tom Cremeens. Get down with Tom on some modern tunes and brace yourself for yet another roller-coaster wildweek of nonstop music at Humphrey’s Bar & Grill!! Ain’t no stoppin’ this train! THE CORNER Dave Anderson - Electric & Acoustic, Rock, Alternative & Originals THE CROSSROADS Jim Cavender & Jonathan Giles host “The Monday Night Roots Review” Open Mic THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 18 ACOUSTIC CAFÉ at SISTER GOOCH Jim Parker hosts Songwriters in the Round MOVA Judges Performance featuring Casey Kelly, Chris Gantry and Janet McLaughlin BENCHWARMER College Night - DJ FURNITURE FACTORY Ben Moorehead HUMPHREY’S Big Al & The Heavy Weights. Al’s back with more meat in the soup than ever!! As seen on Emeril Live! It’s gonna be one hell of a late night gumbo party. Guarrronteed, hooo!! BENCHWARMER Black Eyed Susan BOBBY G’s University Gryphon FURNITURE FACTORY PUSH HARD DOCK CAFE, Decatur Juice HUMPHREY’S Island Soundzz. The best in Caribbean music & Reggae will be here to entertain you into an island dancing frenzy! Leave your hang-ups at home. This is get loose, wild & free night at Humphrey’s! See you on the patio!! MARTINI’S After Hours - Blues and Southern Rock Band OL’ BREWTAHN Tom Cremeens ROCKABILLY’S Jim Cavendar, 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s Hairbangers Ball TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Keating Johns & Oscar Newman THE CORNER Dave Anderson - Electric & Acoustic Rock, Alternative & Originals THE CROSSROADS Emma Gibbs THE END ZONE T.A., Curtis & Pat THE HOT SPOT Modern Fossils THE SPORTS PAGE The Land TIP TOP CAFÉ TBA TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 16 HUMPHREY’S Stout. This ain’t no Memphis blues band! This band sports the widest variety and creative stylings of any Memphis group. Great variety & fun from Memphis, Tennessee!! ROCKABILLY’S Dave Anderson, 6 - 10 pm TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Toy Shop THE CORNER Scott Morgan - Great Guitarist - Plays 60’s Rock to Current Alternative THE CROSSROADS Jay Wilson & Alan Little THE SPORTS PAGE Stacey Mitchhart TIP TOP CAFÉ Open Mic (Come bring your instrument & voice and join in the fun) WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 17 BENCHWARMER Comedy Night with Jack Kearny & Mo Alexander followed by music from Crazy-N-Sia FURNITURE FACTORY Juice Duo HUMPHREY’S Eric Rhodes Band.They’ve got skills! Blues with an attitude! See you there! MARTINI’S Karaoke OL’ BREWTAHN Jason Albert ROCKABILLY’S Tom Cremeens, 6 pm. TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Tom Cremeens THE CORNER Marjorie Loveday - Keyboard & Acoustic Rock and Folk THE CROSSROADS Dave Anderson THE SPORTS PAGE Pla’ Station, Ladies Night THIRD BASE GRILL 5ive O’clock Charlie I just want to write a little “sumpin sumpin” about the comedy being brought to Huntsville. If you haven’t been to a Comedy Night at the Benchwarmer yet (there’ve been three in the last two months), you have really missed out. Butch Cassidy, owner of the Benchwarmer, has brought some huge acts to town. We have seen Scotty K, Don Trenajel, Wynn Reichert, Darrin Meyer and “Tennessee Tramp,” Janet Williams. All of these acts have either been on Comedy Central or have worked in major Vegas casinos. I have been to every one of these shows, and they all have been extremely funny. Tickets are only $10; but if you stop by and have a beer and tell Butch you heard about Comedy Night in the Planet, hell, he’ll give you half off. So, if you haven’t been to or heard about Comedy Night at the Benchwarmer, keeping checking the Valley Planet or go to www.valleyplanet.com and check the calendar. Thanks again, Butch, for bringing some laughs to town. B.S. MARTINI’S Live Acoustic Music OL’ BREWTAHN Robby Hutto ROCKABILLY’S Ant & Andrew, 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s Venus Model Search with Throck Martin TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Dave Anderson THE CORNER Tom Cremeens - Electric Rock & Alternative THE CROSSROADS The Snake Doctors SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 20 BENCHWARMER Horse BOBBY G’s University Gryphon FURNITURE FACTORY The Scratch Band HARD DOCK CAFE, Decatur Sister Luck Continued on the next page page 19 MUSIC EVENTS Continued from page 19 HUMPHREY’S Johnny Neel & The Last Word, this is quite a star studded show. If you don’t know who Johnny Neel is, it’s OK. Come out tonight and hear what he can do. I told you this train ain’t stopping! JELLO ROOM Band TBA MARTINI’S After Hours - Blues and Southern Rock Band OL’ BREWTAHN Robby Hutto ROCKABILLY’S Andy Clark & Jimmy G, 6 - 10 pm SAMMY T’s 17th Floor TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Pat Morris THE BRICK, Decatur Short Bus, 8:30 pm. A Great Mix of Dance, Funk and Classic R&B - A Big Yellow Party on Wheels! THE CORNER Girl In The Middle - Acoustical Duo Variety Rock THE CROSSROADS Chinese Dentists THE SPORTS PAGE Witchdoctor’s Opera, 9 pm THE STATION Short Bus, 1pm - Trail of Tears TIP TOP CAFÉ Remedy (High Energy Classic Rock & Roll - Leave the kids at home, this show is more for adults) SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 21 HUMPHREY’S Jay Wilson & Alan Little: The Dog & Pony Show! Relax and enjoy grooving out with Alan & Jay. Make sure you catch your breath, though. Next week is even wilder! people who are reading this have a chance to win toy shop cd’s and t-shirts and wwe raw wrestling tickets at the von braun for Monday, september 8, 2003. go to: www.valleyplanet.com to find out how to win! TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Ant & Andrew THE CORNER Scott Morgan - Great Guitarist - Plays 60’s Rock to Current Alternative THE CROSSROADS Movie Night - Film showing and local live music! THE SPORTS PAGE Poker Face MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 22 HUMPHREY’S TBA. With all the excitement going on this month, I forgot to book this one!! You can help!! I need your help!! The choices are Tom Cremeens, Lacy Atchison, Pat Morris or Scott Morgan. Call 256-9902001 to register your vote! THE CORNER Dave Anderson - Electric & Acoustic, Rock, Alternative & Originals THE CROSSROADS Jim Cavender & Jonathan Giles host “The Monday Night Roots Review” Open Mic TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 23 HUMPHREY’S Stout! Here we go! You had better hang on tight because it’s all down hill from here!! This is Big Spring Jam week, and have we got one for you!! ROCKABILLY’S Dave Anderson, 6 - 10 pm TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Toy Shop THE CORNER Scott Morgan - Great Guitarist Plays 60’s Rock to Current Alternative THE CROSSROADS Jay Wilson & Alan Little THE SPORTS PAGE Donny Cox page 20 Through September 24 The Skeeters will be at the Tip Top Café on Sept. 6. Call it what you will — Alt-Country, Redneck Rock and Roll, Americana — The Skeeters play good hard-driving music and are considered the “crown jewel” of Southern music by their many followers and fans. In February of 2003, the band had the honor of touring with the legendary Billy Joe Shaver in support of his “Freedom’s Child” tour. Read more about The Skeeters at www.theskeeters.com. Northeast Alabama Photography Club Photography Exhibit Mountain Valley Arts Council Gallery, Guntersville Members of the NEAPC participating in the exhibit are Sherry Abercrombie, Boaz; Rod Gulling, Boaz; Sandra Gulling, Boaz; Randy McClendon, Guntersville; Jerry Perkins, Arab; Sandi Perkins, Arab; Candice Perkins, Arab; Billy Smith, Crossville; Janice Smith, Crossville; David Stafford, Joppa; Edna Stafford, Joppa; Richard Wilthall, Scottsboro, Diane Wilthall, Scottsboro; Randy Mardis, Boaz; and Kenneth Beck, Altoona. For more information on this or other exhibits, contact the Mountain Valley Arts Council at 256-582-1454 or email [email protected]. Information may also be found on the web at http:// MountainValleyArtsCouncil.org. Through September 28 WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 24 BENCHWARMER Crazy-N-Sia FURNITURE FACTORY Big Daddy Kingfish Acoustical HUMPHREY’S Eric Rhodes Band. Come get your blues with an attitude adjustment! Just leave it to Eric, Alana & Matt. They’ll get your spine straight. See you there. MARTINI’S Karaoke OL’ BREWTAHN Jason Albert ROCKABILLY’S Tom Cremeens, 6 pm - 10 pm. TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE Reese THE CORNER Andrew Sharpe - Keyboards and Acoustic Rock and Alternative THE CROSSROADS Japonize Elephants THE SPORTS PAGE Pla’ Station, Ladies Night THIRD BASE GRILL 5ive O’clock Charlie Kathryn Lansing Vaughn Huntsville Times Gallery Exhibit A special selection of art predicated on the co-existence of the Spiritual with humankind is on display. The oils, watercolors, ink and mixed media resonate deeply of a quest through this life to the next. Vaughn currently lives in Harvest and is an adjunct professor of Art at UAH, Calhoun, ASU and Oakwood. The exhibit can be viewed Monday through Friday, 8 to 5 at the Huntsville Times Building, 2317 S. Memorial Pkwy. For more information call 256-532-4000. Through September 30 Iona Erickson Artist of the Quarter Arts Council Gallery Huntsville Art League member Iona Erickson EVENTS Continued from page 20 will exhibit her art work at the Arts Council Gallery, 700 Monroe Street. The work may be viewed Mon – Fri, 9 am - 5 pm. Through September 30 Tessmann Butterfly House Huntsville Botanical Garden More than 30 species of North American butterflies take flight throughout the summer. Visitors can see every stage of the life of these quiet creatures from egg, to caterpillar, to chrysalis, and finally to beautiful butterfly. Mon – Sat, 9 am - 8 pm; Sun, 1 - 8 pm. $6 Adults, $5 Senior or Military, $3 Children ages 3 - 18, Members Free. For info visit www.hsvbg.org or call 830-4447. Through October 31 Scarecrow Trail Huntsville Botanical Garden Good old-fashioned fall fun. Between 70 and 80 fabulous, weird, funny, and traditional scarecrows lurk along Garden’s trails, and flower beds. 2002 saw giant ants and spiders, flying astronauts, and Uncle Sam. 2003’s Scarecrow Trail will be even more creative with prizes offered in the following categories, most original, funniest, traditional scarecrow, weirdest, most scary, famous people and judges choice (a catchall category). Other Scarecrow Trail activities include the creepy 1-acre Sorghum Maze - for kids of all ages, and hayrides around the Garden on the weekends. Traditional music groups will entertain on Sundays, and delicious candy apples and hot cider will be available to round out this wonderful old time festival. www.hsvbg.org 256-830-4447. Through October 31 Treemendous Treehouses Huntsville Botanical Garden Local designers have created fanciful and futuristic treehouses guaranteed to bring out the child in young and old alike. From a flying fortress to a flying saucer, these treehouses are all one-of-a-kind. Mon – Sat, 9 am - 8 pm, Sun 1 - 8 pm. $6 Adults, $5 Senior or Military, $3 Children ages 3 - 18, Members Free. For info visit www.hsvbg.org or call 830-4447. September 5 – 7 41st Ann Arbor Film Festival (Rated R) CHAN AUDITORIUM, UAH Campus The Ann Arbor Film Festival is a celebration for filmmakers from around the world. This is the festival that honors artists for their individual voice. This tour includes about 20 awarded and highlighted short films from the 2003 festival. Part One: Sept. 5 at 7 pm. Part Two: Sept. 6 at 7 pm. Part One (repeated): Sept. 7 at 2 pm. Part Two (repeated): Sept. 7 at 4:30 pm. Co-hosted by The Film Co-op and The Association for Campus Entertainment. Admission per part $5; Film Co-op Members and UAH students $3. www.filmcoop.org September 6 Art Tasting Fair HAL instructors will demonstrate their art and have samples available. Come and “taste” our wares, then select your personal artistic menu from the classes offered. Free Demonstration 10 am to noon. September 6 Pauli’s Restaurant Blood Drive American Red Cross Bus at Pauli’s Bar & Grill, Slaughter Rd. 9 am to 2 pm. For an appointment, call Sheila Wilburne or Tricia Rowe at 256-772-2080. All donors receive certificates for a FREE Chick-Fil-A sandwich. The first 32 donors will be registered to win a FREE DINNER for 2 at Pauli’s. September 6 Wine Tasting Pauli’s Gourmet Food & Wine Co. Slaughter Rd. 256-722-0071. 3 to 5 pm. Ask us to add you to our in-house email list. September 6 Contra Dance Live music by Birmingham’s Jim & Joyce Cauthen with Caller Chrissy Davis Camp. All ages welcome- singles, couples & families. 7:00 pm Beginner’s Lesson, 7:3010:30 pm Dance. Admission $7.00/$4.00 students/Free for age 12 & under. In gym of Faith Presbyterian, corner of Airport Rd. & Whitesburg Dr. For more info visit http:// secontra.com/NACDS.html or call 837-0656. September 6-21 Designer Showhouse To Benefit Huntsville Museum of Art Showcasing the home of Jim and Tina Caudle, this historic house is located on Randolph Avenue and will feature 9 rooms redecorated by local ASID members. Along with the home tour, there will be a café and store. Additional special events will include fashion shows by “A Good Place To Be” by Marty Davis, oil on canvas Slaughter Rd. 256-722-0071. 3 to 5 pm. Ask us to add you to our in-house email list. September 13 Guided Tour: “The Farmer/James Collection of Southern Art (1850-1950)” Huntsville Museum of Art, 11 am September 14 Gallery Walk: “A Stitch in Time: One Family’s Legacy” The Common Thread: New uses for an Old Technique Huntsville Museum of Art, 2 pm September 15 Community Free Day Huntsville Museum of Art, 10 am – 5 pm No admission charged for non-members. September 15 Quilting Demonstration Huntsville Museum of Art, 10 am – 2 pm in conjunction with “A Stitch in Time: One Family’s Legacy” The “Friends in Faith” multimedia art exhibition starts September 10 with a catered reception at Sandridge Student Union Art Gallery at Athens State University and will remain on display until October 10. Exhibitors include Payge Atwater Semmes, who shows lively portraits and outdoor scenes in vibrant oil pastel, Jane Davis, who demonstrates the results of conscientious research in caring and living in a polymer-clay medium, and Marty Davis, who renders living moments in oil paint like light refracting through canvas. Admission and memories are free. For more info, call Jane Davis at 256-233-8928. September 18-20 September 8 September 18-21 September 11 Quilting Demonstration Huntsville Museum of Art, 6 – 8 pm in conjunction with “A Stitch in Time: One Family’s Legacy” September 11 Guided Tour: “A Stitch in Time: One Family’s Legacy” Huntsville Museum of Art, 7 pm September 11-14 Oktoberfest 2003 at Redstone Arsenal German beverages, music, fun and dance. Games and rides for all ages! Parking, rides and entertainment included. Open to the public. Everyone Welcome - Enter at Gate 10. $2 off at www.redstonemwr.com. September 12-14 “The Secret Affairs of Mildred Wild” by Paul Zindel Presented by Theatre Huntsville, VBC Playhouse For ticket information call 256-5360807 or email [email protected]. www.theatrehsv.org September 13 Wine Tasting Pauli’s Gourmet Food & Wine Co. You could be next! September 20 Huntsville Symphony Orchestra Classical Concert #1, VBC Concert Hall 7:30 pm. Featured soloist, Alisa Weillerstein, cello. Moncayo: Huapango. Dvorak: Cello Concerto. Rimsky-Korsakov: Sheherazade. For more info, call 256-539-4818, email [email protected] or visit www.hso.org. September 20 Wine Tasting Pauli’s Gourmet Food & Wine Co. Slaughter Rd. 256-722-0071. 3 to 5 pm. Ask us to add you to our in-house email list. September 20 SteinMart, Talbots and Doncaster, as well as special dinners and guest lectures on how to make your home more beautiful. Admission is $12 per person. Groups of eight or more who purchase their tickets in advance will receive a $2 discount per person. For info, contact Chairman Nancy Van Valkenburgh at 256-539-0505. WWE Wrestling Presents RAW Live at the VBC Arena, 6:45 pm WINNERS! “Wonder Trivia”memorabilia winner is Bill Desenburg of Petaluma, CA. “Blonde or Maybe Not” wins the VP t-shirt for asking Uncle Flabby! www.valleyplanet.com “The Secret Affairs of Mildred Wild” by Paul Zindel Presented by Theatre Huntsville VBC Playhouse For ticket information call 256-5360807 or email [email protected]. www.theatrehsv.org Monte Sano Art Show Monte Sano Mountain Arts, Crafts, Food and Music visit www.montesanoartshow.org September 20 Contra Dance Live music by Jingo String Band with Atlanta Caller Janet Shepherd. All ages welcome- singles, couples & families. 7: 00 pm Beginner’s Lesson, 7:30-10:30 pm Dance. Admission $7.00/$4.00 students/ Free for ages 12 & under. In gym of Faith Presbyterian, corner of Airport Rd. & Whitesburg Dr. For more info visit http:// secontra.com/NACDS.html or call 837-0656. September 20 Bonsai Class with Arthur Joura Huntsville Botanical Garden For info visit www.hsvbg.org or call 256-8304447. September 21 St. Matthew’s Episcopal on Hughes Road Good Fortune Ceilidh Band. Irish – Scottish Traditional Tunes. (morning) 2003 MOVA Arts Festival Civitan Park, Guntersville, Ala. Along with an international songwriters’ competition, a visual arts component and activities for children, the festival also gives musicians and songwriters a chance to study under and interact with music professionals from throughout Alabama and Tennessee when they attend the MOVA 2003 Musician’s Conference. For info, contact the Mountain Valley Arts Council at 256-582-1454 or email [email protected]. Information may also be found on the web at http://MOV A.MountainValleyArtsCouncil.org. September 21 Quilting Demonstration Huntsville Museum of Art, 1 – 4 pm in conjunction with “A Stitch in Time: One Family’s Legacy” September 19-20 September 26 Registration deadline for “ArtSafari” to Kentuck Huntsville Museum of Art Madison Indian Festival 401 Lime Quarry Rd., Exit 8 @ I-565 Sponsored by The American Indian Museum, Madison Chamber of Commerce, City of Madison and Rock Divers Inc. Come and experience the American Indian lifestyle firsthand. See demonstrations of crafts and skills such as basket weaving, pottery making, flint working and weapons, for example, the bow & arrow, blowgun, and atl-atl. There will also be dancing, drumming, story telling and much more. Contact: Steve Edge, 256-8517241 or 931-425-6131, www.americanindian-museum.com. Madison Chamber of Commerce, 256-461-0518, www.madis onalchamber.com. Trail of Tears, 536-3702, www.al-tn-trailoftears.org. September 21 Guided Tour: “A Stitch in Time: One Family’s Legacy” Huntsville Museum of Art, 2 pm September 21 “Views of the Collection: Recent Acquisitions” closes Huntsville Museum of Art September 26-27 Lincoln County Bluegrass & Crafts Festival Fayetteville, Tenn. Admission is FREE! Friday night and all-day Saturday. September 27 Wine Tasting Pauli’s Gourmet Food & Wine Co. Slaughter Rd. 256-722-0071. 3 to 5 pm. Ask us to add you to our in-house email list. September 28 “Huntsville Collects” closes Huntsville Museum of Art page 21 The 41st Ann Arbor Film Festival at UAH by Linda A. Haynes both parts,” explains Anna Sue Courtney, president of the Film Co-op. “Closer to Heaven” “Twirl Girl” While the Film Co-op instigated this tour stop, the UAH Association for Campus Entertainment was more than willing to jump in as co-sponsor. “We think this is a great thing to have on campus,” says Barbara Czura, Film Director of ACE. “It’s such a well-known film festival and we feel lucky to be involved this year.” “Bitter” “Yes? Oui? Ja?” All screenings are at Chan Auditorium on the UAH campus. Chan Auditorium is in the Administrative Sciences Building, which is located on Holmes Avenue east of Sparkman Drive. Plenty of free parking is available during the screenings. o, how does a Midwestern film festival find its way to Huntsville? Admission for each part is $5; for Film Co-op members and UAH students, the cost is $3. For more information go to www.filmcoop.org. The Ann Arbor Film Festival, one of the longest running film competitions in the US, has a reputation for rewarding creative voices. Brian DePalma, Andy Warhol, Lawrence Kasdan and George Lucas are just a few of the luminaries who have submitted film works to this festival since it began in 1963. SCREENING SCHEDULE: Friday, September 5, 7 p.m. - Part One Saturday, September 6, 7 p.m. - Part Two Sunday, September 7, 2 p.m. - Part One (repeated) Sunday, September 7, 4:30 p.m. - Part Two (repeated) The festival’s touring program is booked years in advance by colleges and film groups from San Francisco to New York City. And this year, it makes a stop in Huntsville — thanks to the efforts of The Film Co-op and the University of Alabama in Huntsville. FILMS IN PART ONE: S Prepare to be entertained. Almost 20 awarded and highlighted short films from the 2003 competition will be shown. Who can resist productions with names like “Glow in the Dark,” “Twirl Girl” and “Bear Girl: Dog Boy”? Then there’s “Nutria,” winner of this year’s funniest film, where scientists, S.W.A.T. teams, mascots and chefs share stories about their experiences with a bizarre swamp rat that is destroying the wetlands of Louisiana. This R-rated program is divided into two parts with each presented twice over the September 5-7 weekend. “We’re hoping this schedule with repeat showings gives most everyone a chance to catch one or 3.5 minutes, experimental narrative. London, England. Won Isabella Liddell Art Award. A very short comic/tragic film about feeling bitter and miserable and twisted. About feeling that the world misunderstands you and everyone hates you (probably with reason), and that time is passing and leaving you behind. “Ultima Thule” 10 minutes, experimental animation. Los Angeles, California. Gravity falls, and land and sky lose their historical meaning. A small silver plane navigates an ultramarine storm, flying over barely-glimpsed hills. It is an unlikely ferry to “ultima Thule” — the farthest point north, the limit of any journey. FILMS IN PART TWO: “Rude Roll” “Nutria” 10 minutes, experimental. Toronto, Canada. Received an Honorable Mention. A life in postcards. “The Good Son” 9 minutes, documentary. New York, New York. A pent-up powerhouse of tempered rage, Jimmy struggles to be his own keeper. Beneath the surface of this unspoken truce churn age-old questions about violence, responsibility and the meaning of being a man. “Arrete” 3.5 minutes, experimental documentary. Austria. In the background, the bells of a herd of goats. In the foreground, geese, and once — possibly a shepherd — someone who loudly calls “Arretez!” - “Stop!” 3.5 minutes, experimental. Frankfurt, Germany. The making of the film was overshadowed by the director’s friend’s death. Instead of “visual easy listening,” as was intended, it turned out rather different. 28 minutes, experimental documentary. San Francisco, California. Won a Tom Berman Award for Most Promising Filmmaker. The film traces Robert Hall’s rekindling sense of self and strength — not just to cope, but to live fully, in spite the childhood abuse he recounts. 12 minutes, animation. Toronto, Canada. Using the imagery of our glossy magazine culture, Mother Nature narrates a fable of human sexual dynamics within a cut-out animated world of fashion, sports, nature and pornography. 13.5 minutes, documentary. Austin, Texas. Won Prix deVarti Award for Funniest Film. The nutria is an Argentinean swamp rat that is destroying the wetlands of Louisiana. It is also a cultural touchstone, as scientists, mascots, SWAT teams and chefs all respond to this bizarre pest. 4.5 minutes, experimental. Vashon, Washington. Received an Honorable Mention. A study of circular motion incorporating hand processing, xerography, rotoscoping and found footage, transposing the image of a woman dancing. “Downpour Resurfacing” “Bear Girl: Dog Boy” “Damaged” page 22 14 minutes, experimental. Brooklyn, New York. Won Audiovisions Award for Best Sound Design. Using the weather as a metaphor for the stages of grief, this film is a goodbye poem and homage to the filmmaker’s father. 5 minutes, animation. Victoria B.C., Canada. Won Chris Frayne Award for Best Animated Film. Using the HOW-TO-DANCE SKA photos on the backs of three 70s LP jackets, plus stock HOW-TOANIMATE-LIKE-THE-PROS drawings, the film boogies along to a Lee Perry-King Tubby inspired dub track. “In Order Not to Be Here” 33.5 minutes, narrative. Chicago, Illinois. Won Gus Van Zant Award for Best Experimental Film. An uncompromising look at the ways privacy, safety, convenience and surveillance determine our environment. Shot entirely at night, the film confronts the hermetic nature of whitecollar communities, dissecting the fear behind contemporary suburban design. “The New Patriots” 18 minutes, documentary. New York, New York. A Congressional Medal of Honor recipient, a woman West Point graduate, and three other U.S. military veterans focus on terrorism, patriotism and government hypocrisy. “Teatro Roots” 9 minutes, documentary. San Francisco, California. Won EMPA Worklife Award. A father and son reflect on the origins of the family business — an acclaimed Latino theater company known as El Teatro Campesino (the farm-workers’ theater). “Sand” 12 minutes, animation. Regina Saskatchewan, Canada. Won a Tom Berman Award for Most Promising Filmmaker. Characters reflect on their past during a quiet night in an urban environment. Uses the hybrid technique of sand animation and computer manipulation to deal with the subject of memory. “Glow in the Dark (January-June)” 6.5 minutes, experimental. Chicago, Illinois. Received an Honorable Mention. Radiators clang while spheres and cypridina phosphoresce. A rubber ball held up to light becomes a snowy crystal. Home science experiments and other attempts to see with the camera in the dark. “U” 4 minutes, experimental. Zurich, Switzerland. Facts on farts, an introduction to the fine art of fart. Starts and departs with a fart. With great music from rears to ears. The Deep End Convergence in Art The Depiction of Emotion by Cherié Lamb Who Am I? By Justin Segura As I crawl out of bed, I land on my head, And then I go back to sleep. I know no more. When I finally come around, My head begins to pound. All the faces that I see Make no sense to me. I’m starting to get sick. My stomach feels real thick. As a phone starts to ring. I see a bird take wing. Käthe Kollwitz (1867 – 1945) Revolt (Outbreak), 1927 (first printed 1902)etching and aquatint, 19.75 x 23 in. Donated to Huntsville Museum of Art by Dr. John C. & Mary Ann McMillan R ecently donated and presently on display at the Huntsville Museum of Art is a masterful work by world renowned artist Käthe Kollwitz. This piece, entitled “Outbreak,” is one of six prints (the series is called “Peasant’s War”) that depict scenes of and captures the emotion of the peasant rebellion of the sixteenth century in Germany. Kollwitz’s body of work typically involves the expression of oppression, the plight of the downtrodden and the emotion surrounding death and destruction. Kollwitz, a socialist, lived through two World Wars in Germany and had firsthand experience with the death, destruction, sadness and oppression associated with surviving in a war-torn society. She was a master at capturing raw emotion in her works and purposely exhibited most of her work in print in order for her images (her philosophy) to be more affordable for purchase, therefore, reaching a larger audience. John Kennedy stated in a speech once, “Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable.” The German peasant revolt is indicative of this statement. Inspired by the teachings and words of Martin Luther and the ever more degrading living conditions and crop failures, the peasants rallied together in hopes of freedom. Even with the ironic discovery that Luther did not support their rebellion, they could no longer accept the conditions of their lives and stood together to overthrow their oppressors. It is thought that seventy-five thousand peasants were killed in 1525 alone. In “Outbreak,” we not only have a visual representation of the peasants’ rebellion, but we are given an understanding into their mental state. The contrast of light and dark symbolizes the struggle between good and evil, the oppression and hope. The leader is Black Anna; her placement in the foreground intensifies her power and the inspiration she gives to the others. As she raises her arms, she also raises their hopes — you can almost hear her scream. Kollwitz gives the peasants to Anna’s right a hunched over, almost animal look, capturing their beaten-down spirit and their less-than-human existence. One peasant stares at Black Anna, appearing to absorb strength (enlightenment) from her power. As the peasants storm past Anna, they appear more human and glow with youthful innocence as if to indicate hope for the future. It is a story repeated all throughout our history and most recently with 9/11. When we are beaten down, are witness to such atrocity, and are faced with the reality that we have nothing left to loose, humanity bands together to pursue truth and justice, an act for the greater good. [email protected] We’ve had lots of comments about The Deep End. We’ve had several people say they would send us something. But very, very few have followed through. Please send us your stuff. Send poems, art, prose, thoughts, philosophical ramblings, anything, to deepend @valleyplanet.com. I still can’t remember Whether it’s December, Or whether I’m Joe or Bob. My head is all a throb. But there’s one thing I know, It all just goes to show. It doesn’t matter if you’re rich or a bum, As long as you know … HEY! Where’d those penguins come from? Justin is a 9th grader from Hazel Green High School. photo from Maple-Hill Cemetary by the multitalented Cherie Lamb DELIVERANCE By Cherié Lamb Deliverance of the moment Too unreal to understand Searching for the answer But infinity has reached its end My lingering body floats above the line Then crashes as I breathe My eyes open as I struggle to be And now I know what was forgotten Actions of a lifetime Are sometimes a contradiction to the soul They are only an expression Of my uncertainty relinquished A knowing accomplice to my own demise At least that is what the innocent always say page 23 LISTINGS DINING 801 FRANKLIN 801 Franklin Street (Downtown by Medical Center), 256-519-8019. Lunch: M-F 11-2, Dinner: M-W 5-10 pm & Th-Sa 5 pm-1 am. Lounge opens 4 pm M-F. Full Bar & Extensive Wine List. www.801franklin.com. APPLEBEE’S (3 locations) 3028 Memorial Pkwy SW, 256-881-8111, 3150 Memorial Pkwy NW, 256-859-4200 and 302 Hughes Rd, Madison, 256-772-3441. BEAUREGARD’S (3 locations) 1851 University Dr. , 256-512-0074, 511 Jordan Lane, 256-837-2433 and 975 Airport Rd. SW, 256-880-2131. BENNIGANS 1009 Memorial Pkwy, 256-534-6141. BUFFALO’S CAFE 8020 Hwy. 20, Madison. 256-772-4477. CAHOOTS 114 West Market Street, Fayetteville, TN. 931-433-1173. Dine in old jail cells. CATTLEMAN’S STEAK HOUSE 520 Main Avenue S, Fayetteville, TN. 931-433-8834. Great Steaks & Seafood. Full service bar. page 24 CHILI’S (2 locations) 4925 University Dr., 256-722-9620 and 2740 Carl T. Jones, 256-882-1230. COPELAND’S OF NEW ORLEANS 2004 Airport Road SW, 256-650-3131. M-Th 5 – 10 pm, F-Sat 5 – 11 pm, Sun 11 am – 2 pm. Full Bar & Extensive Wine Selection. www.washingtonsq.com/chophouse.htm SISTER GOOCH CAFÉ, BAKERY, AND MARKET 382 Slaughter Road, Madison, 256-971-5200. Thursday nights: Live music at Acoustic Café. TGI FRIDAY’S 4935 University Drive NW, 256-830-2793. www.tgifridays.com. FOGCUTTER RESTAURANT & LOUNGE 3805 University Drive NW, 256-539-2121. WEST END GRILL 6610 Old Madison Pike, 256-722-8040. Steaks, chicken and seafood. FURNITURE FACTORY BAR & GRILL 619 Meridian Street N (just north of Downtown), 256-539-8001. Live music on the patio. SEE CALENDAR for details. WILD FLOUR BISTRO 600 Jordan Lane NW (shopping center, corner of Holmes and Jordan). 256-536-0939. HUMPHREY’S BAR & GRILL 109 Washington Street (Downtown, corner of Washington and Clinton), 256-704-5555. 11 am – 2 am everyday. Live music on the patio – SEE CALENDAR for complete listing. JAZZ FACTORY 109 North Side Square (Downtown on the Square), 256-539-1919. Live Music, Full Bar & Extensive Wine List. LE BISTRO DU SOLEI 300 Franklin Street (Downtown on the Square), 256-539-7777. BREAKFAST COFFEE & LUNCH ATLANTA BREAD COMPANY 6275 University Dr, 256-922-2253. COTTON ROW MARKET 109 Washington Street (Downtown, corner of Washington & Clinton), 256-704-5555. (breakfast & lunch). www.washingtonsq.com/cottonrow.htm DISH 117 North Main Ave, Fayetteville, TN. 931-433-7096. Tues-Sat 11 am - 2 pm. PAULI’S BAR & GRILL 7143-C Hwy 72 W (corner of Slaughter Rd. & Hwy 72), 256-722-2080. Full Bar & Extensive Wine List. Reservations Suggested. EUNICE’S COUNTRY KITCHEN 1006 Andrew Jackson Way NE (Five Points), 256534-9550 PAULI’S CHOPHOUSE 109 Washington Street (Downtown, corner of Clinton and Washington), 256-704-5555. JAMO’S CAFÉ 413 Jordan Lane NW, 256-837-7880. Mediterranean Fare, Sandwiches & Specialty Coffees. Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner. THE WILD ROSE CAFE’ 121 North Side Square, 256-539-3658. SEATTLE SOUTH 2113 Whitesburg Drive S (Whitesburg Medical District), 256-534-0513. THE OLDE TOWNE COFFEE SHOP 511 Pratt Ave NE, 256-539-5399. CAJUN PO BOY FACTORY 815 Andrew Jackson Way (in Five Points) 256-5393616. TIM’S CAJUN KITCHEN 114 Jordan Lane, 256-533-7589. GREEK PAPOU’S 110 South Side Square, 256-534-5553. DELI & PIZZA BELLACINO’S PIZZA & GRINDERS 4851 Whitesburg Dr, 256-880-8656 and 8572 Madison Blvd, Madison, 256-774-1918. BIG ED’S PIZZERIA 721 Clinton Avenue, 256-536-2872. McALISTER’S DELI (2 locations) 4800 Whitesburg Drive S, 256-880-1557 and 1480 Perimeter Pkwy, 256-425-0034. Appetizers, Salads, Sandwiches, Spuds & Desserts. Kid’s Menu. SCHLOTZSKY’S DELI (5 locations) 2835 Memorial Pkwy NW, 256-852-4088, 4319 University Drive NW, 256-830-6400, 3417 Memorial Pkwy SW, 256-881-3354, 8969 Hwy. 20, Madison, 256-464-5300 and 11120 Memorial Pkwy SW, 256-650-6300. STANLIEO’S SUB VILLA (2 locations) 605 Jordan Lane, 256-837-7220 and 602 Governors Drive, 256-536-6585. TERRY’S PIZZA (3 locations) 9034 Memorial Pkwy S, 256-881-5987, 3612 Governors Dr, 256-536-3389 and 2514 Memorial Pkwy N, 256-539-3467. ZAXBY’S 1025 Memorial Pkwy NW, 256-551-0122 and 100 Ivory Pl, Madison, 256-461-0026. MEXICAN & SOUTHWESTERN BANDITO BURRITO 3017 Governors Dr SW, 256-534-0866. EL MARIACHI (3 locations) 14450 Hwy 231-431 N (Hazel Green), 256-8281466; 1836 Winchester Road, 256-851-7255; 7193 Hwy 72 W(Madison), 256-890-0900. EL PALACI 2008 Memorial Pkwy SW, 256-539-6075. QDOBA MEXICAN GRILL 4800 Whitesburg Dr., 256-489-1367 GREEN HILLS GRILLE 5100 Sanderson Street NW (corner of Wynn and University), 256-837-8282. LA ALAMEDA MEXICAN RESTAURANT 3807 University Drive NW, 256-539-6244. LITTLE ROSIE’S TAQUERIA 4781 Whitesburg Dr S, 256-882-0014. ROSIE’S MEXICAN CANTINA (2 locations) 6125 University Drive, 256-922-1001 and 7540 S. Memorial Pkwy, 256-382-3232. Mon–Sat. Lunch & Dinner. Dart Tourneys (plastic & steel), Thursdays College Night w/DJ. Open 7 days 10 am to 2 am. Dinner nightly. www.benchwarmersportsbar.com. TIA’S TEX-MEX 2003 Drake Avenue SW, 256-881-6868. BILLIARD STREET CAFE’ 2703 University Drive, 256-534-6000. ITALIAN LUCIANO 964 Airport Road SW, 256-885-0505. ROMANO’S MACARONI GRILL 5901 University Drive, 256-722-4770. VILLA FIORE 11505 S. Memorial Pkwy, 256-881-7746. JAPANESE BOBBY G’S PLACE (2 locations) 1009 Henderson Road, 256-837-4728 and 4070 Memorial Pkwy S, 256-880-2590. Steaks, seafood, chicken and wings. Live music & Karaoke. BROILER STEAK & SEAFOOD 7908 Memorial Parkway S, 256-880-2525. Friday & Saturday night Karaoke. CHIPS & SALSA CANTINA 10300 Bailey Cove Rd SE 256-880-1202. Full Mexican menu, dart tournaments. CLUB MIRAGE 4701 Meridian Street, 256-851-2920. Chicken, steak, pasta and seafood. THE CORNER GRILL & PUB 10300 Bailey Cove Road SE, 256-880-2103. Burgers, steaks & sandwiches. Great food, live entertainment nightly. Great neighborhood atmosphere. THE CROSSROADS 721 Clinton Ave, 256-533-3393. Live Music 7 nights a week 75 cent drinks Sunday-Thursday THE END ZONE 1909 University Drive, 256-536-2234. Sandwiches, steaks, and ribs. 22 TVs, 8 Satellites, and live music Friday & Saturday nights. Lunch & Dinner every day. CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE... EDO JAPANESE RESTAURANT 104 N. Intercom Drive, Madison 256-772-0360. MIKATO JAPANESE STEAK HOUSE & LOUNGE 4061 Independence Dr. NW (one block N. of University on Jordan Ln.), 256-830-1700. MIKAWA RESTAURANT 1010 Heathland Dr, 256-837-7440. Authentic Japanese Restaurant. SHO GUN JAPANESE STEAK & SUSHI BAR 3991 University Drive, 256-534-3000. Hibachi Tables & Sushi Bar. THAI SURIN OF THAILAND 975 Airport Rd SW, 256-213-9866. THAI GARDEN RESTAURANT 800 Wellman Ave. NE, 256-534-0122. CHINESE Huntsville’s Premier Dining Experience DING HOW II 4800 Whitesburg Dr., 256-880-8883. JADE PALACE 4925 University Drive NW, 256-536-7100. JOY LUCK RESTAURANT 3782 University Dr NW, 256-536-7100. GERMAN BIERGARTEN CAFÉ 3810 Wall Triana Hwy, Madison 256-772-0511. OL HEIDELBERG CAFÉ 6125 University Drive NW E14 (shopping center next to Rosie’s), 256-992-0556. PUBS & CLUBS Contemporary American Cuisine Casual Atmosphere Award Winning Wine List 721 721 Clinton Avenue, 256-534-0721. ALLEN’S GRILLE & GROG 9076 Madison Blvd, Madison, 256-772-8514. Madison’s Best Kept Secret. Express lunch menu, Mon - Fri, 11am - 2pm. Extended Happy Hour: M-F, 3 - 8 pm; Sat-Sun, noon - 8pm. Free hors d’oeuvres M-F 4:30 - 6:30pm. Saturday: Ladies’ Night. Free Pool and NASCAR race specials on Sundays. Best wings, burgers and home-cooking around! BENCHWARMER FOOD & SPIRITS 2998 University Drive, 256-539-6268. Lunch buffet, steaks, sandwiches. Live music, 12 ft. TV screen, 7 big screens, 22 TVs. NASCAR Sundays, Classic Southern Hospitality Catering & Banquet Facilities Available 801 Franklin Street HUNTSVILLE, AL 256.519.8019 www.801franklin.com Lunch Monday-Friday Dinner Monday-Saturday page 25 MARTINI’S OF MADISON Ramada Inn, 8716 Madison Blvd, Madison 256772-0701. Drink Specials 4 pm to 7 pm. Great Food, Live Music. MOLLIE TEAL’S 99 Jefferson Street, 256-512-5858. Live entertainment. OL’ BREWTAHN TAVERN 2704 Johnson Road, 256-880-3714. Live entertainment Wed–Fri. Volleyball tournament every Saturday at 2 pm. Sunday is race day - 25 cent wings. OTTER’S Marriott Hotel, 5 Tranquility Base. 256-830-2222. PEANUT FACTORY BAR & GRILL 903 Memorial Pkwy NW, 256-534-7092. Burgers, sandwiches and steaks. 3RD BASE GRILL 7904 Memorial Pkwy S, 256882-9500. Great Food for Lunch and Dinner. Mondays $0.25 Wings, Tuesday Trivia, Live Music on Wednesday & Thursday. Open Mic on Sunday w/Dart Tournaments. Open 11 pm – 2 am, Mon–Sat, open at noon on Sundays. RUGGBY’S 4820 University Drive, 256-895-0795. Deli sandwiches. SAMMY T’S MUSIC HALL 116 Washington Street, 256-539-9974. Best Live Music in Huntsville Thu – Sat. Open 6 pm – 2 am. Now open on Wednesdays. www.sammytsplace.com THE SHACK 105 Swancott Road, Triana 256-461-0227. The bar that never closes! Live music Friday & Saturday. PUBS & CLUBS continued from page 25 FINNEGAN’S PUB 3310 Memorial Pkwy S, 256-881-9732. HOG WILD SALOON 2407 Memorial Pkwy, 256-533-7446. HOOTER’S 4730 University Drive, 256-722-0166. Seafood and sandwiches. SPORTS PAGE LOUNGE & DELI 9009 Memorial Pkwy S, 256-880-9471. Plate lunches, deli sandwiches. Live entertainment Mon – Thu. Sunday is open Mic night. Thu, Sat & Sun pool and dart tournaments. THE STATION 8694 Madison Blvd., 256-325-1333. Live entertainment nightly. Lunch specials weekly. Happy Hour 3 – 8 pm. Open 7 days a week 11 am – 2 am. TAVERN UNDER THE SQUARE 110 South Side Square, 256-534-3033. Open Mon–Fri 3:30 pm – 2 am, Saturday & Sunday 5 pm – 2 am. Live music Tue–Sun. HUMPHREY’S BAR & GRILL 109 Washington Square, 256-704-5555. Beef, seafood, sandwiches. Come for the food – Stay for the Fun. Best Patio in Huntsville. Happy Hour every day 11 am – 6 pm. Live music every night, no cover. Open 11 am – 2 am everyday. TENNESSEE VALLEY VIPERS Arena Football 2. American Conference Southern Division Champs. 700 Monroe St, VBC, 256551-3240. www.vipersaf2.com. TIP TOP CAFÉ 123 1/2 Maple Street, 256-5331527. Where the Past meets the Future. Great Bands. Live entertainment every night. www.tiptopcafe.net Jennifer at 3rd Base photo by Suwarow TUNES ULTIMATE KARAOKE BAR 3000 University Drive, 256-539-6902. ZESTO PUB & GRILL 720 Pratt Avenue, 256-489-9378. Corn dogs, prime rib. GALLERIES ARTISTIC IMAGES 2115 Whitesburg Drive, 256-534-3968. www.artisticimagesgallery.com HUNTSVILLE ART LEAGUE GALLERY 721 Clinton Avenue, 256-534-3860. www.huntsvilleartleague.org. HUNTSVILLE BALLET CO. 800 Regal Drive SW, 256-539-0961. HUNTSVILLE MUSEUM OF ART 300 Church Street S (In Big Spring Park), 256-5354350 or 800-786-9095, Hours: Mon – Sat: 10 am – 5 pm; Th: 10 am – 8 pm; Sun 1 – 5 pm, Adults $8; Children under 12 are free; Children, Sr., Students w/ID $7; Th: 5 – 8 pm $4, www.hsvmuseum.org. MERIDIAN ARTS (2 locations) 305-A Jefferson Street, 256-534-7475. M-F: 10 am – 6 pm, Sat: 10 am – 4pm; and 370 Little Cove Road, Gurley, AL, 256-7764300. Tu-F: 10 am – 6 pm, Sat: 10 am – 4 pm. www.Meridianarts.net. SIGNATURE GALLERY 2364 Whitesburg Drive S, 256-536-1960. WHITNEY DAVIDSON GALLERY 501 Church Street NW, 256-539-0063. JELLO ROOM 4210 Oakwood Avenue, 256-837-0813. Huntsville’s Hard Rock Shooter Bar, featuring an all female staff, digital hard rock jukebox, 9 pool tables, steel-tip dart boards, TVs, foosball and live music. Extensive liquor selection, more than 80 beer selections, unique shooter menu, and of course, jello shots. Open Tues - Fri, 5 pm to 2 am, and Sat 7 pm to 2 am. MILITARY NIGHT OUT WEDNESDAYS ATTRACTIONS AMERICAN INDIAN MUSEUM 2003 Poole Drive NW, 256-852-4524. www.american-indian-museum.com BURRITT ON THE MOUNTAIN: A LIVING MUSEUM 3101 Burritt Drive SE, 256-536-2882. KAFFEEKLATCH BAR 103 Jefferson Street, 256-536-7993. page 26 HUNTSVILLE SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA North Side Von Braun Center, 256-539-4818. 801 FRANKLIN 801 Franklin Street (Downtown by Medical Center), 256-519-8019. Dine with fine art. www.801franklin.com. JEMISON’S EATERY & PUB 350-A Market St. NE, Decatur, 256-351-0300. Open from 10:30 am Mon-Sat. KEEPERS SPORTS BAR S. Memorial Parkway at Byrd Spring Rd. (in Rosie’s restaurant shopping center). 256-882-6111. Come see the usual sports events on TV. Ladies Night every Thursday. HUNTSVILLE STARS AA Affiliate of the Milwaukee Brewers Joe Davis Stadium, 3125 Leeman Ferry Rd. SW, 256-882-2562. www.huntsvillestars.com. THE THIRSTY TURTLE TAVERN & GRILL 4800 Whitesburg Drive, 256-8815079. Deli sandwiches, burgers, salads. Great food, atmosphere and daily drink specials. PLANET VINYL 115 Clinton Avenue, 256-533-9071. Great Dance Party every Saturday night. ROCKABILLY’S SMOKEHOUSE GRILL 255 Pratt Avenue, 256-489-1831. Chicken & burgers. Live music. HUNTSVILLE BOTANICAL GARDEN 4747 Bob Wallace Avenue, 256830-4447. www.hsvbg.org. EARLYWORKS MUSEUM COMPLEX 404 Madison Street SE, 256-564-8100. Rhonda at her Jello Room, photo by a planeteer unknown. HARRISON BROTHERS HARDWARE 124 Southside Square, 256-536-3631. US SPACE & ROCKET CENTER 1 Tranquility Base, 256-837-3400. Open 9-5 year round except for Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve and Day, and New Year’s Eve and Day. Admissions: Museum only – Adults $12 & Child 3-12 $8, IMAX only – Adults $7.50 & Child 3-12 $6.50, Combined – Adults $16.95 & Child 3-12 $11.95. www.spacecamp.com. THE WEEDEN HOUSE 300 Gates Avenue SE, 256-536-7718. THEATER/ STAGE FANTASY PLAYHOUSE CHILDREN’S THEATRE 3312 Long Avenue SW, 256-539-6829. RENAISSANCE THEATRE AT LINCOLN CENTER 1214 Meridian Street N, 256-536-3434. THEATRE HUNTSVILLE Business Office. 1701 University Dr, Suite 1, 256536-0807. www.theatrehsv.org. MOVIE THEATERS CARMIKE CINEMAS 1359 Old Monrovia Road, 256-430-0770. www.carmike.com. RETAIL & SERVICES BARNES & NOBLE BOOKSELLERS 5850 University Dr, 256-864-2090 and 2750 Carl T Jones SE, 256-885-0501. THE BIG TEASE Hair and Tanning Salons 11203 Memorial Pkwy. SW, 256-882-7419 & 401 #1 Hughes Rd, Madison, 256-464-5321. CALLIE ALLIE’S 131 Old Hwy 431, Hampton Cove, 256-536-7467. Home Design, Accessories & Gifts. JULIA CARTER Licensed Massage Therapist. By appointment. 256-536-2164. DISCOUNT JEWELRY & REPAIR 11203 Memorial Pkwy SW, 256-882-7409. ENLIGHTENMENT BRIDGE SPIRITUAL BOOKS & GIFTS 804 Wellman Ave (in Five Points) 256-533-9506. A metaphysical bookstore. THE FRET SHOP 309 Jordan Lane, 256-430-4729. Guitar, Banjo, Mandolin, Sales, Instruction and Repair. www.thefretshop.com. Garden of Eatin’ by Jennifer H. Daniel Eden’s East latest endeavor, Eden’s East, located at 2413-B Jordan Lane. Recently opened, this vegetarian restaurant offers items free of refined sugars, eggs, dairy and meat products. Unearthing upright vegetarian cuisine in Huntsville is like tracking down a great glass of sweet iced tea in New York City. There aren’t going to be countless options offered and the alternatives will only be middling for the most part. Okay, okay — there are the exceptions to this rule in our town. Creating your favorite vegan dinner with organic groceries from Garden Cove, grabbing some hummus from Jamo’s or picking up homemade baked items and Reed’s Ginger Brew from Pearly Gates are more than acceptable options for those brave locals who photo of Garden Cove Produce by Cherie Lamb choose to eat a little more opened-mindedly than me. At first I thought, what a plight … to (What can I say? My mom makes the choose to eat no meat or dairy in an best double-dipped fried chicken in the area where Gibson’s Barbecue and Blue world.) Bell Ice Cream reign supreme among obsessive thoughts on a hot, lazy August Oh, there are the mundane, standard afternoon in Alabama. However, I am selections for our vegetarian friends happy to announce a new addition to the like the salad bar at Ruby Tuesday’s, list of vegetarian-friendly establishments the veggie sandwich at Barnes and in Huntsville. Nobles or the bean and rice burrito at one of our many fine Mexican restaurant Owner Ron Jackson brings a breath of establishments, but these server inspired fresh air to the meatless crowd with his suggestions are bologna (pun intended). Employee and vegetarian aficionado John St. Rose recommends the Grecian Wrap. “It comes with vegan turkey with a soy-cheese base and special sauce, and then it’s grilled,” St. Rose said. “It’s my favorite.” There’s also a salad bar, more sandwich selections and burgers — a refreshing alternative to the black bean burger offered at Applebee’s. Daily lunch and dinner specials include a meatless choice and three vegetables with cornbread or garlic bread for $5.49. For now, Eden’s East is closed on Saturday and Sunday. However, the restaurant plans to open on Sundays in the future. Jennifer Daniel is currently living the good life with her husband and two dogs, Mars and Paolo. [email protected] 2413-B Jordan Lane, 256-721-9491 Hours: Monday – Thursday, 11 a.m. to 6 p.m.; Friday, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. For some other alternatives in vegetarian fare and groceries, try these tried-and-true establishments and tell them you read about them in the Planet: Pearly Gates Natural Foods 2308 Memorial Parkway SW, 256-534-6233 Hours: Monday – Saturday, 10 a.m. to 6:30 p.m. Closed Sunday. Natural food store. Organic foods. Has soups and great muffins. A local favorite that has been in town for more than 10 years. Jamo’s Juice & Java and More 413 Jordan Lane, 205-837-7880 Hours: Monday – Saturday, 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. Closed Sunday. Middle Eastern restaurant and juice bar. Not purely vegetarian. For the meat eater, great chicken kabobs and Middle Eastern/Greek fare. Many vegetarian sides and entrées. Garden Cove Produce Center 628 Meridian Street N, 256-534-2683 Email: [email protected] Web site: http://www.gardencoveproduce.c om/ Hours: Monday & Tuesday, 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. Wednesday, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Thursday, 9 a.m. to 7 p.m. Friday, 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Sunday, noon to 5 p.m. Closed Saturday. Natural food store. A good juice bar and great website. Online orders are accepted for local and out-of-town convenience. They ship anywhere! Organic produce and bulk food with groceries, frozen foods and fresh vegetables. The one-stop shop for vegetarian groceries in Huntsville. GARDEN COVE PRODUCE CENTER 628 Meridian St., 256-534-2683 or 888-615-8657. Fresh produce delivered every week, year round. www.gardencoveproduce.com. GIGAPARTS 4925 University Dr, 256-535-4442. Computer Sales & Service. www.gigaparts.com. MAC RESOURCE 1570 The Boardwalk, 256-721-1700. Apple Computer Specialist. www.macresource-al.com. NEW HORIZONS COMPUTER LEARNING CENTER 620 Discovery Dr, 256-722-0211. www.newhorizons.com. PATTY’S HEARSE A Formal Party Coach for Hire. 256-457-6278. email [email protected]. SHAVER’S BOOK STORE 2362 Whitesburg Dr, 256-536-1604. SOUTHERLAND’S PHOTO 2357 Whitesburg Dr., 256-539-9627. Black & White Photo Lab Services. Digital Photo Restoration. STRINGS ‘N’ BRASS 409 Pratt Ave (across from Sonic) 256-533-9088. www.stringsnbrass.com. WEST STATION ANTIQUES 112 Main Street, Madison, 256-772-0373. 565 to Exit 8 - Exit North to Main Street. Hours: Mon-Sat 10-5, Sun 1-5 p.m. Thanks Johnny, Tina and everyone for a great Saturday at Rockabilly’s, photos by Suwarow Johnny Giles at the Tavern page 27 make your customers happy. advertise with the valley planet. page 28 ’s O H C R A N A DR Beads, Bathrooms and Black Batons Rx for Old Stuff That Don’t Suck by Jeremy L. Anderson And on Sept. 18, 1970, God stuck His fingers in His ears and said, “Hey, Gabriel, knock it off with the damned horn already. By the time you read this, I will have turned 30. As everyone always seems to stress over this particular birthday, I decided to make a concerted effort to focus on something else. I started thinking of all the experiences in my life that I could have avoided had someone warned me of them in advance. As a public service, I’m going to clue you men in on a few of those things so you can all steer clear of the mistakes that I have made. Pay attention, because I’m dropping pearls of wisdom here. I’m ready to hear a little guitar.” He’d been threatening to stick Gabriel’s trumpet under the wheel of a golden chariot for eons, and even God can only take so much harp plucking. And Lo — not JLo — when God came down and visited His little talking primate experiment, He was pleased with their musical evolution. When the Big Kahuna heard Jimi Hendrix play his flaming ax, He decided He wanted an order of that to go and took Jimi with Him. God knew that, come October, Janis Joplin would trade her Kozmic blues for two cases of Southern Comfort and a case of Kozmic dead. She’d need a guitar player. The little all-star dead band God was building would soon spell trouble for Led Zeppelin drummer John Bonham and Who bassist John Entwhistle. Sometimes you can be just too damned good at something to be allowed to remain on earth and do it. God knows this issue’s Rx is Jimi Hendrix — Are You Experienced? In 1967, Jimi Hendrix hit the rock music world with a sonic boom. If James Brown is “The Godfather of Soul,” Hendrix is the “Father of Psychedelia.” No one before or since has been able to coax, persuade, force and demand as much from an electric guitar as Jimi Hendrix. The music world was stunned. Not only was Hendrix a world class guitarist — some say the best that ever lived — he was a master showman and experimented with amplification. He developed a feedback technique that made interplanetary travel seem possible. Hendrix had to travel to England and back to become a star in America. In the mid 60s, he was a backup guitarist for a number of R&B acts, including Little Richard, King Curtis, and The Isley Brothers. His talent and showmanship made him a show-stealer, and the lead guitarists and stars themselves felt inferior — and with good reason — so he was handcuffed as a soloist. In England, Hendrix was teamed with bassist Noel Redding and drummer Mitch Mitchel, and The Jimi Hendrix 1. There are certain places you should not www.jimi-hendrix.com ARE YOU EXPERIENCED, the jimi hendrix experience. MCA Records. Originally released August 23, 1967. Available on CD. Experience was born. Hendrix was a master singer and songwriter, who incorporated blues, rock, R&B, soul and everything else into his style. “The Wind Cries Mary,” “Hey Joe” and “Purple Haze” were hits in the UK before America heard of them. Not until the 1967 Monterey Pop Festival did America catch on to Jimi Hendrix. He played guitar behind his back, with his teeth, and even played a guitar doused in lighter fluid and set aflame. “Purple Haze” had one of the great misunderstood lyrics of all time: “’scuse me, while I kiss the sky” was misheard by many as “while I kiss this guy.” The first time one of Anarcho’s not-so-bright friends heard it, he was loving it until that line came along. Then he said, “Kiss this guy? That sumbitch is queer! Why you listenin’ to homo-music?” exfoliate. Though it may seem like a fantastic idea to ignore the natural order of sloughing off skin like Dick Clark, there are places that God did not intend you to rub cream with little blue beads in it. Exfoliating cream looks like lotion, and it feels like lotion ... until the next day when you begin to sweat. Then, your vigorous removal of dead skin cells will become a fiery dance of death as you scramble to the nearest bathroom to splash water on your burning loins. If you’re unlucky like me, your mother will walk in while you’re doing this. A word of advice: any explanation you come up with will sound worse than the truth, so don’t bother. Aside from this, there is the danger of not rinsing away all those little blue beads. Combined with sweat, this gives a sensation akin to coarse grit sandpaper. Strangely, it feels good for the first hour or so ... but I digress. 2. You will always get caught before you’re finished. Never once in history has someone been nabbed in the afterglow, while smoking a cigarette or letting the air out of the doll (or both simultaneously if you’re talented). You won’t even get caught when you’re stapling Miss June to the bathroom door. And on a personal note, it hurts so much more when your mother says “I’m not mad ... I’m just disappointed.” Especially when you’re dressed like the construction worker from the Village People. A lot of you are probably judging me right now for that last bit, but it’s only because you prefer the cop or the Indian. And that’s just plain wrong, no matter how you look at it! 3. That shop-vac you got for Christmas wasn’t meant to be used for that. Sure, it works great on sawdust, cat litter and even the occasional cleanup of leftover exfoliant beads from hardto-reach places. But then, that’s what a shopvac was designed to do (with the possible exception of the exfoliant thing, which was just personal ingenuity). What it is NOT designed to do is apply 20 foot-pounds of suction while you watch old reruns of “The Facts Of Life.” Plus, once you’ve tried that sort of thing, it can become addicting. The next thing you know, your neighbors are calling the police every time you crank up the 2-ton vacuum pump you bought from an industrial surplus store. Also, “I’m trying to suck out the evil” will only make your mother laugh harder when she catches you. 4. Always ask to see I.D. because apparently not every woman with handcuffs is a cop. Some of them even have those shiny black batons, despite never being remotely affiliated with any law enforcement agency. Plus, there’s always that lingering feeling that this person is supposed to be upholding the law. Most importantly, if you do decide to let Officer Hotpants “arrest” you, never leave the videotape out on the coffee table for your mother to find. Basically, the lesson here is to not only purchase many locks to help prevent the discovery of your deviant behavior, but also to remember to use said locks every time, without exception. Or perhaps the lesson is to move out of your mother’s house before you turn 30. Speaking of which, I better make sure Mom is still out of town so I can use the vacuum cleaner. It’s for the living room carpet, you pervert! Get your mind out of the gutter! Jeremy L. Anderson’s shop-vac caused that power blackout. Email your complaints to [email protected]. Any and all aspiring rock guitarists should own some Hendrix. Though he was with us for only four short years and three fully conceived albums (Are You Experienced? Axis Bold As Love, and Electric Ladyland), Clapton, Beck, Page, Townshend, and Haynes — rock’s great guitarists — all pay homage to Hendrix. One big disappointment of Hendix’s short life was that he was shunned — ridiculed — by the black community as “being too white.” Not many knew then that Hendix’s music was neither black nor white. It was a haze of purple, a color all its own. [email protected] page 29 HUNTSVILLE SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA CELEBRATES: PART 2 By Evelyn Loehrlein In the previous issue, Evelyn Loehrlein explained how the Symphony’s search committee identified ten semi-finalists from a field of 230 applications for the position of Music Director and Conductor. committee chair Bert Parsons. Each candidate spent approximately one week in Huntsville, rehearsing and performing with the orchestra, and meeting with the symphony board, donors, civic leaders and the search committee. Audience members took the opportunity to meet the conductors after each concert and provide opinions to the search committee. Enlightenment Bridge Spiritual Books & Gifts 804 Wellman Avenue Huntsville Located in 5 Points 533-9506 Books for the Mind Gifts for the Spirit A Metaphysical Bookstore INTREPID TRAVELERS Site visits to the ten semi-finalists began with a trip to Houston on September 4, 2001. Delegations of search committee members, HSO musicians and friends fanned out to locations from Poughkeepsie, New York to Mexico City. Although there was much work to be done — candidates to interview face-toface, rehearsals to observe, concerts to study — the delegates availed themselves of local diversions, attractions and cuisine. Huntsville’s “Bus Lady” Louise Heidish checked out public transportation at every site she visited. HSO Principal Bassoonist Hunter Thomas served as interpreter on the Mexico City trip. Upon arrival, the Huntsville visitors were greeted by then future Music Director, a hospitable Carlos Miguel Prieto, who presented the visitors with a complete itinerary for their stay. The group enjoyed a visit to Mexico City’s archeological museum guided by their knowledgeable host and climbed the Pyramids of Teotihuacan. They “shopped ‘til they dropped” at a Mexico City open market. In addition to comments from the public, Parsons and his committee heard from trustees and volunteers. Search committee members and HSO musicians Jeffrey Dortch and Dorrie Nutt coordinated a formal survey by the orchestra musicians of each candidate. On March 27 of this year, the HSO announced its selection of Prieto to a gathering of major donors at AmSouth Bank. Since then, Prieto has made two visits to Huntsville to meet with Symphony officials and sponsors. After an exhaustive three-year search, the payoff is finally here: Carlos, musicians, staff and audience eagerly anticipate a glorious season opener on September 20. For more information about the Huntsville Symphony Orchestra’s upcoming season and to purchase tickets, call 256-539-4818 or visit the website at www.hso.org. In November, a whirlwind tour of New York to visit candidates in Poughkeepsie and Westfield, N.J., provided opportunities to dine at the Culinary Institute of America, attend Die Meistersinger at the Metropolitan Opera and wander the streets of Manhattan. Delegates also traveled to Lubbock, Texas; Bozeman, Mont.; Pensacola, Fla.; Peoria, Ill.; and Cincinnati, Ohio. There was a great spirit of camaraderie and fast friendships were formed. FIVE FINALISTS VISIT HUNTSVILLE By December of 2001, all site visits were concluded, and the search committee met again to pursue a difficult task — identify the five finalists who would make appearances in Huntsville. After hours of debate, five outstanding finalists were selected. “These five were our top choices. The ones whom we asked accepted,” said search page 30 photo of Carlos Miguel Prieto by Peter Schaaf Evelyn Loehrlein is principal flutist and Executive Director of the Huntsville Symphony Orchestra. LEAD STORIES Researchers Steven Potter (Georgia Tech) and Guy Ben-Ary (University of Western Australia, Perth) have created a robotic “arm” that makes a painter’s rudimentary brush strokes at Ben-Ary’s lab, directed over the Internet by its “brain” (composed of 50,000 rat neurons in a petri dish) in Potter’s lab, according to a July report from BBC News. According to Potter, the brain is not yet classically “intelligent” but does “adapt” (i.e., experience less chaos) and thus strokes more smoothly over time. SPAM-AZING Wired magazine reported in August that an order screen at the big e-mail spammer, Amazing Internet Products, was left unsecured and was hacked into recently, revealing not only an inexplicably large sales volume (6,000 orders in four weeks for $50 Pinacle cream that promised to increase penis size by up to 3 inches) but some prominent, should-know-better customers, such as the manager of a $6 billion mutual fund in New York City. Wired (and earlier, Salon magazine) reported that AIP’s two principals are a 19-year-old highschool dropout and chess vagabond and a 20-something former head of a neo-Nazi outfit. People Different From Us In August, St. Louis, Mo., school board member Rochell Moore sent Mayor Francis Slay an open letter, criticizing his schoolclosing management reforms and advising him that because of his obstinacy, she had placed a curse on him. According to a report in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, Moore’s curse was modeled after Deuteronomy 28: 21, in which Moses told the Israelites what would happen if they strayed from God, e.g., “The Lord shall make the pestilence cleave unto Francis Slay ...” (When a former city comptroller later told reporters he thought Moore had “mental problems,” Moore allegedly threatened to kill him.) Reuters reported in June that would-be painter Rainer Herpel, 51, of Bad Ems, Germany, was finally speaking again, after having remained silent for the last 29 years as a reaction to his father’s disapproval of art as a career. Herpel lived with his mother, spent most of the time alone in his room concentrating on his paintings, only occasionally ventured outdoors, and came out of his shell only when his father passed away. Said Herpel, “All great artists were outsiders (probably meaning “different from us”) before they had success.” More Things to Worry About The 2003 valedictorian of Alcee Fortier Senior High School in New Orleans failed (for the fifth time) the state’s mandatory exit exam, and she cannot graduate until she passes (August). And workers tearing down the reactors at the old Hanford, Wash., nuclear reservation discovered dozens of radioactive nests of mud dauber wasps, but so far no wasp had mutated into a monster (August). And the district attorney of Watauga County, N.C., frustrated at the light sentences judges hand down for methamphetamine producers, announced that he will begin to charge defendants instead (via a recent anti-terrorism law) with manufacturing a “nuclear or chemical weapon” (August). If you encounter radiation, go outside (if you’re inside a building) or go inside (if you’re outside a building) Cliches Come to Life New York City’s new 16-page anti-terrorist preparedness manual, produced by a consortium of 20 government agencies and released in July, contains such advice as: If you encounter radiation, go outside (if you’re inside a building) or go inside (if you’re outside a building); Do not accept packages from strangers; If you find yourself holding a mysterious substance, put it down. Also offered is the familiar advice from a generation ago: If you can’t get out of a building, “(Duck) under a sturdy table or desk.” In March, in Lisbon, Ohio, after William Neville, 30, allegedly tried to get intimate with a woman who had taken out a stayaway order against him, police chased the man out of her home, down the street through the Lisbon Cemetery, until he accidentally got caught in a briar patch. The St. Petersburg Times reported in July that Pinellas County (Fla.) judge Richard Luce was being investigated for losing his temper in May and thus becoming unsuited to sentence convicted attempted-murderer Tam Thane Vo. Luce became angry when he surmised that Vo’s mother had raised her hand, middle finger extended, to her forehead in reaction to the verdict, but the mother said she was merely having an adverse reaction to her shampoo. In Kingsford, Australia, in May, Phyllis Newnham, vying for a larger portion of the estate of her late friend Florence Mather, claimed in court that Mather had made out a subsequent, more generous, superseding will but that one of Ms. Mather’s dogs ate it (and she produced DNA testing to show that the dog had eaten a mangled document, but it was unclear if that was the will). Least Competent Criminals At the Amoco station on Route 59 In Spring Valley, N.Y., on June 22, an unidentified man twice jumped on the counter and shouted, demanding that the clerk hand over money, but twice the clerk pushed him off, and the man finally gave up and left. And in August in Delray Beach, Fla., a man tried to carjack Larry Klein, 53, who is disabled, but Klein repeatedly jabbed at the man out the window with one of his crutches, and he finally ran away. Paying Their Bills the United Way In June, Jacquelyn Allen-MacGregor, 47, a 20-year executive with United Way in East Lansing, Mich., was remorseful after being sentenced to four years in prison for stealing more than $2 million from the agency to buy show horses; said MacGregor, “I do believe that I’m obsessed with horses.” And an independent investigation revealed in August that Mr. Oral Suer, the former CEO of United Way of the Washington, D.C., area, had taken $1.5 million in improper payments during his tenure; among the alleged improprieties was that Suer made several annual gifts to United Way in his own name but then collected bogus expenses from the organization to cover the donations. Our Civilization in Decline In McNairy County, Tenn., in August, father Steven Joseph Yurick, 33, was convicted of producing child pornography on the Web site he runs in order to promote the modeling career of his 13-year-old daughter; authorities found no explicitly erotic photos on the site, and the girl said she enthusiastically posed wearing scanty clothing because she so earnestly wants to be a fashion model. Meanwhile, a Brisbane, Australia, modeling agency run by Darrell Featherstone uses his 8-year-old daughter Morgan as a fashion model but only after making her up and dressing her to appear to be an adult. Below the Fold Robin Wilkinson, a 19-year veteran prosecutor who resigned after being charged with DUI, said her main defense would be that, at the time of the traffic stop, police did not tell her that she had the right to an attorney (Orlando, Fla., August). And an accountant was charged with embezzling $170,000 from his employer (a union local) and explained that he gave it all to a female assistant for three years’ worth of oral sex (New York City). No Longer Weird Adding to the list of stories that were formerly weird but which now occur with such frequency that they must be retired from circulation: (65) Parents who on a hot day leave their infants locked in the car (accidentally or for what they believe is only a brief period), resulting in death, as happens usually to underachieving people but which also happened in August to University of California professor Mark J. Warschauer. (66) And the proliferation of Internet pages by penpal-seeking lonelyheart inmates such as Saul dos Reis Jr., who is serving time in Connecticut for a fatal sexual assault on a 13-year-old girl, and who advertised himself (on Inmate.com, before the ad was recently removed) as “enjoy(ing)” “being silly and funny” and who has “many qualities which make me unique.” Least Justifiable Homicides Victor Robinson was charged with murder in Miami in April after he allegedly told police he roughed up his 8-month-old son to stop him from crying so that he wouldn’t grow up “to be a punk.” And in May in Rockville, Md., a 12-year-old girl formally acknowledged at a hearing that she had fatally stabbed her 15-year-old brother during a dispute over whose turn it was to use the phone. And in the Last Month ... Three teenagers with paintball guns terrorized kids on a playground until they fired into the wrong group of kids, one of whom returned fire with a real gun, wounding two paintballers (Pittsburgh). An expert in workplace violence for the Hawaii state government was allegedly roughed up by his supervisor in a policy dispute (Honolulu). The government of India’s West Bengal state began distributing copies of the venerable Kama Sutra sex guide to teach prostitutes creative ways to give pleasure to clients without AIDS-risky penetrative sex. Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679 or [email protected] or go to www.NewsoftheWeird.com. COPYRIGHT 2003 CHUCK SHEPHERD DISTRIBUTED BY UNIVERSAL PRESS SYNDICATE 4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600 page 31 Ask Uncle Flabby [email protected] Dear Uncle Flabby, I need help!! There’s a guy that I like and he likes me but there’s another guy who I like a lot !!! I don’t know what to do!?! The first guy is really nice and sweet and has the most interesting personality! He is willing to help at the first chance he gets, no matter what the problem is!!! Plus, he’s my age, a freshman!! The second guy is a junior and is soooooooooooooooooooooo oooo hott !!!!!! I’ve known him for about 4 days. He’s more my type too! The 1st guy is my type too, but I’m happier as friends! Well, can u help me???????????????????????? Well, g2g!!!!! Help Me, Hopelessly Confused Dear Punctuation Happy Teenager, Words of wisdom from an Uncle who has been around the block: Hot cools off fast; sweet lasts a long time. UF P.S. And additionally, I think three additional o’s would have sufficed. Dear Uncle Flabby, I’ve met the woman of my dreams, or at least I think it’s a woman, we’ve only talked online. And only the once, so maybe not............But it did last all night and it was great. Anyway, some friends say I have a problem with making decisions, what do you think? Or do I care what you think? I’m not sure...... Blonde or maybe not Dear Blonde, You seem to think there is some connection between your first paragraph and your second. I don’t see anything in the first paragraph that has anything to do with making decisions. And I don’t see anything in the second paragraph that has anything to do with meeting women online. But you do ask me two things. First you want to know if you have trouble making decisions – well, how the hell am I supposed to know? Usually people try to give an example of the problem they are having. In your case, I would need an example of your difficulty (or ease) in making decisions. You haven’t given me one, so how am I to judge? Second you want to know if you care what I think. You tell me. You’re the one who wrote asking for my advice on a problem of which I know absolutely nothing! I think you probably have less of a problem making decisions than you have making sense. UF I recently lost a multi-million dollar position because I got drunk and can’t remember what happened, but there was a huge room service bill involved. Any advice on a course of action? Rollinginit Dear In It, Leave town, change careers and slow down on the liquor. UF Dear Uncle Flabby, I have an insatiable appetite when it comes to my girlfriend. I was thinking of having her cloned so I can pull her out of the closet, whenever I like. Do you think this is a good idea? Signed: The Craving Dear Craving, If you have the thousands of dollars necessary to go out of the country to find a doctor who will help clone your girlfriend AND you have access to her DNA, AND you have an available womb that isn’t being used for 9 months, AND you can afford to feed, clothe, educate, and support a child for 18 years, AND you wouldn’t feel bad about satisfying your “appetite” on someone who by that point would probably feel like a daughter to you, I’d say “Go for it!” UF Dear Uncle Flabby, I have the first pick in my fantasy football draft this year. What do you think Ricky Williams chances are of leading the NFL in rushing, again this year? FinHead Dear FH, Ricky Williams — yeah, he’s who I’d go with. Either him or Pete Sampras. UF Dear Uncle Flabby, There’s something that has been bothering me since I was a little kid. Can you tell me if Disney’s “Goofy” is a dog, a wolf, or what is he? Perplexed page 32 Dear Perplexed, Goofy is in fact a dog — albeit an anthropomorphized dog. Goofy originally appeared as Dippy Dawg in the 1932 short film “Mickey’s Revue.” Over the next several shorts, his name changed to Dippy the Goof and finally Goofy. However, it wasn’t until the 1935 short “Moving Day” that both Goofy’s look and personality achieved their classic, identifiable “goofiness.” His first starring role was in 1939’s “Goofy and Wilbur.” Over the next 6 decades, Goofy changed and grew, like we all have. He became cuter, less obnoxious and lovable. During the Baby-Everything craze of the late ‘80s early ‘90s (Muppet Babies, Scooby Doo Babies, Baby Scott Bakula), Goofy was briefly transmorgrified into an horrific Baby Goofy. Currently he has a teenage son-dog, Max, and is a hip, lovable dad-dog. UF Dear Uncle Flabby, I recently heard a rumor that you are really a girl? This kind of bothers me, since I tend to idolize you and follow your advice religiously. Can you put my mind at ease by posting a picture? Your Obedient Disciple Dear YOD, Why exactly would idolizing and taking the advice of a WOMAN bother you? Sounds awfully sexist, YOD. Who do you think that seal is anyway? UF Dear Uncle Flabby, Women suck. All you do all day is try to please them. I do everything they say. I buy them dinners and clothes and flowers and candy. But it always ends up the same. Me sitting at home in my dingy little apartment playing with my cats. Help me break out of this rut and meet a girl I can impress. Signed, Only the lonely Dear Lonely, You’ve got both a dingy little apartment and a brood of cats? If the women aren’t impressed with you now, I can’t imagine they’d be impressed with anything. They’re the ones missing out! UF Dear Uncle Flabby, I haven’t been to class in months. Some days I’m too depressed, other days I’m too tired, but most days I’m just too hung over. Anyway, I’m flunking out and I can’t hide this from my dad too much longer. I don’t want to go get a job, that’s just too lame and I can’t go to those stupid classes. How can I keep dad’s money coming in without having to go to school? Flounder Dear Flounder, If you are in elementary, middle or high school, your dad would already know because he probably gets your reports in the mail and notices that you never leave your room to get to school on time. So let’s assume you’re talking college. (Just an aside — YOU PEOPLE HAVE GOT TO START BEING A LITTLE MORE EXPLICIT IN YOUR QUESTIONS! While I am telekinetic — I AM NOT PSYCHIC! I am getting really tired of trying to fill in the blanks from your questions before I can even start to answer them. Geesh!) My first question would be how does your dad know you’re flunking out? Does the school send grades to him? If that’s the case, then he knows, and he’s just waiting for you to dig yourself into a deeper hole. However, if the school gives grades to you, don’t show him. Tell him you’re doing great. Heck, even drop out, just don’t tell Dumb Old Dad. And, if after 5 or 6 years he begins to wonder why you still haven’t graduated, tell him you did, but just forgot to invite him. Tell him you’re now working on a combined MD/PhD, and your workload is so tough that you need even MORE money from him. Eventually he’ll die, and if he hasn’t already wasted all of his hard-earned money on his worthless offspring, you’ll get the remainder and never have to get a lame job or go to stupid classes. And you can spend the rest of your tired, depressed, drunken life lounging about in a low-rent college apartment complex eating cold pizza and burping. Good luck. UF Dear Uncle Flabby, My girl friend and I have been dating for 2 years. I love her to death, but she has been exercising and losing weight and is really starting to look hot. During these past 2 years I have been gaining weight and am getting kinda fat. I can’t decide if I should get her to eat more or if I should start working out. Your advice would be appreciated. P.S. How much do you weigh UF? Maybe that would make me feel better? Booger Dear Booger, Hmm, I don’t know. That sure is a tough one. Should you turn your girlfriend into a fat-ass or turn yourself into a lean, mean love machine. I think you’ve stumped me there. Anyone? UF P.S. 194. Doubt it. [email protected] News, Views & Notes By Jimbo Scampi [email protected] Here we go gang, mindless ramblings about sports, gambling and other stuff. Let’s start with Baseball. ... How bad are my Detroit Tigers? They’re on pace to lose 122 games and shatter the major league record of 120 by the ‘62 Mets. (Why couldn’t I have been born in Atlanta?) ... Speaking of Atlanta, the Buffalo Braves will make the World Series again. They will play Oakland, and they will lose, again. ... Barry Bonds is the MVP without question — any guy who can make his father’s last days so exciting gets my vote. (In case you don’t know, he hit 2 walk-off homeruns in three games against the NL best team, the Braves, during his father’s final days.) ... How great was the Little League World Series, except when Tokyo won, of course. Did anyone see the kid from New England? 6-foot, 180-pounds and he is twelve. ... Baseball’s funniest online casino odds: Mike Piazza (10 to 1) is twice favored to come out of the closet before Brady Anderson, Andre Agassi and Jerry Rice (20 to 1 each). On to golf. ... How great is it to see Tiger Woods lose to all these so-called nonames week in and week out. ... You’ve got to love Phil Mickelson; he comes out on day one of every major always in the lead. Does he put away the driver and play conservative golf and hold on to win? Hell No! Not Lefty. He goes out and misses almost every fairway and blows up for another major letdown. When Phil does win a major, it will be great because he’ll win his way, recklessly. ... Speaking of Phil, did you know that when he was in high school and decided to play in the local U.S. Open qualifier instead of a high school tourney, he was replaced by future alleged double-manslaughterer Scott Peterson? The two were teammates for the next two years. I want to talk about our local sports talk in North Alabama. We have two stations, 730 “The Ump” and 1450 ESPN. I have to say that 1450 is doing a pretty good job. They cover local sports, The Stars, UAH and they had the PGA Championship (that’s right — golf on the radio). Steve Moulton does a great job in the morning, and they have a new evening football talk show that looks promising. A couple of years ago, I hated 730 morning guy, Matt Perrault, but it seems time in the South has done him some good, and he has realized that nobody cares about the Red Sox or the Patriots and that real football is in the South. Also, he gets some real solid interviews. The afternoon guy Doug Franz is probably our best I would have gotten a flood of “you’re nuts” emails. I guess that wasn’t crazy enough. ... Well how about this: N.C. State’s Philip Rivers wins the Heisman and is the fifth QB taken in the NFL Draft behind Ole Miss’ Eli Manning, K-State’s Ell Roberson, Washington’s Cody Pickett and Tulane’s J.P Losman. Oh, by the way, Scott Peterson is 2 to 1 favorite for conviction and the death penalty. local voice. He is always prepared and has a great inside knowledge of all sports (like he has played most of them, whether organized or not). But in every family with three brothers, there has to be a goof. The guy in the afternoon, Dan Back, is a goon. I don’t think this guy has ever picked up a fricking ball in his life. When he was talking about moving John Smoltz from the bullpen to the starting rotation, I actually heard him say, “I honestly do not know how that would affect a pitcher.” You do not know? How can I be expected to take your opinion seriously, if you “do not know.” At least say “hey, that may be a tough transition,” but never “I do not know.” Also, he thinks that if he acts like Jim Rome, people will listen; but there’s just one thing, the real Jim Rome comes on right after him. ... I think I can wait. ( I hope he takes this as a critique). Dateline Columbus ... The much overrated Maurice Clarett is a complete idiot and Jim Brown is a bigger idiot. What makes Clarett think he can change the NFL rules about letting athletes play who aren’t out of high school for more than 3 years? What makes him so damn important? It must be the 62 yards vs. Kent State, or the 39 yards vs. Penn State, or maybe the 52 yards vs. Purdue. No, it must have been the 47 yards vs. Miami. And Jim Brown should not bite the hand that feeds him. If it weren’t for the NFL, he would have been in prison. My Super Bowl pick this year: Eagles over the Titans. ...You may ask “where are the Buccaneers?” I’ll tell ya. Under my bucking hat. Did you know that the official odds for the California governor’s race are Arnold Schwarzenegger (8 to 5, heavy favorite), Larry Flint (40 to 1) and Gary Coleman (1500 to 1)? The real candidate, Cruz Bustamante, comes in at even odds. All of a sudden, Alabama politics look really good. I thought that by picking Michigan to win the National Championship, Alabama to win 10 games and Auburn to beat Oklahoma in the Fiesta Bowl, page 33 continued from page 6 band. We just played music and let people make up their own minds.” Finally, the Sharpe brothers whittled the Toy Shop lineup down to a three-piece and closed a circle with the inclusion of their old friend Jim Keeling, himself a veteran of area music and a drummer’s drummer. About his work with Antony and Andrew, Keeling said: “A great part of my development as a musician came from playing with these two guys. We just seem to gel.” Keeling, for his part, also does time as a touring member of the Atlanta Rhythm Section and the Huntsville aggregate The Snake Doctors. He juggles the projects exceptionally, contributing more than his share to all three endeavors, and still makes plenty of time for his wonderful new wife, Donna. But the appeal of Keeling to the Sharpe brothers, apart from their close friendship, is his skillful, yet soulful, timekeeping, which echoes the styles of great “feel” drummers like former John Lennon sideman/studio-great Jim Keltner and Rolling Stone Charlie Watts. Antony put it this way, “What I like about Jim is that he always plays for the song. And Jim’s instincts are to play to make the band sound better, and that’s a bonus for me,” Toy Shop began in earnest to get their original music heard by a wider audience and often hit the road in support of it. “After a couple of years of playing the original material, people kept coming up and saying, ‘You should have a CD,’” Antony said. “So, we set about committing some of our ideas to tape.” Working at home, without the pressures and clock of the recording studio, the Sharpe brothers and Keeling refined the material and recorded what they felt to be the best representation of their sound. Both brothers had become stellar singers and superb lyricists, in addition to their instrumental prowess, and the exquisite detail in their singing recalls the greatest pop and rock singer/songwriters. Andrew’s high, pure voice recalls Squeeze’s Glenn Tilbrook, while Antony’s grainy rasp is not unlike John Lennon’s scratchy wail. Heard together, the brothers’ voices make an amazing full-bodied sound and complement each other like nothing else. During the recording, Antony handled all manner of guitars, while keyboards were taken care of by Andrew, who also performed the handy trick of doubling up on bass guitar. Jim Keeling’s good-foot drumming is fluid and precise, at once downtown and down home. All three men did backing vocals, and the Sharpes shared lead vocals on the tunes they composed, making for an enjoyable listening experience. In charge of mixing the material that became the Toy Shop CD, Doug Smith of Sound Cell Studios went to work, and the result is a shimmering display of the Sharp brothers’ craft, not least of which are Andrew Sharpe’s arrangements. “Andrew is the ‘Brian Wilson’ of the group,” Antony said, referring to the man whose arranging skills and studio techniques influenced countless musicians, not least page 34 of which was the Beatles, who made Sgt. Pepper’s after hearing Wilson’s work on the Beach Boys’ luminous Pet Sounds album. “Andrew is the guy who not only makes his own ideas really work, but he takes my rough spots and makes them more coherent musically,” Antony continued. During the mixing of the CD, Huntsville musician David Anderson stopped in to Smith’s studio and pronounced, “I hear Andrew Sharpe all over this stuff.” Indeed, the songs brim with melody and poignant and humorous lyricism. The CD was released in July with the simple title Toy Shop. Andrew’s work also adorns the cover of the CD, taking his visual art into yet another medium. “You can hear subtle and sometimes overt hints of everything we’ve come through on the record,” Antony laughs. “There’s Tom Waits and Radiohead next to Neil Young and Steve Harley. And you can hear the South exerting its influence on us as well. I play quite a bit of slide on the record, and twenty years ago you wouldn’t have caught me dead with a slide or enjoying the sound of a lap steel guitar.” Andrew added, with a laugh, “Even more so, at least in my playing, is the influence of guys like Ben Folds, who has a way of putting a beautiful melody under lyrics that describe a less-than-ideal situation.” The brothers effortlessly mix irony and sarcasm with tuneful pop. “We like people who can make a bad day into a beautiful song,” Andrew stated. “What You Do” and “Drop Of Rain” are just two of the ringers on the Toy Shop CD, illustrating this point perfectly. Funnier still is “Crack,” which takes a lighthearted jab at an evil element of society with a chicken picked guitar. “Watch This” is a clever shot of witty country, and “Not What It Used To Be” is a delicate ballad with a blazing slide guitar solo, opening the track up to a widescreen improvisational romp worthy of early-70s Allman Brothers. Not a dud in the bunch. Imagination, indeed. Translated to a live setting, the material stands up well, and the band’s sense of humor and freewheeling intensity make them a crowd favorite, even when sharing stages with heavies like Cheap Trick and the Foo Fighters. Toy Shop definitely holds its own with the best of them. Antony and Andrew Sharpe fill their days easily, and both have active careers outside of music. Antony coaches Lee High School’s varsity soccer program (now in his sixth year!), teaches guitar at the Fret Shop in Huntsville and is happily married to a lovely lawyer, Leslie. Antony and Leslie are the proud parents of a beautiful, bright-eyed nine-monthold daughter, Haley. Andrew Sharpe is a gymnastics coach with Rocket City Gym and paints professionally, doing commissions for local businesses and individuals. He remains the consummate artiste. “Andrew is really a genius in so many ways,” his brother said. “He truly lives for his art and is successful with it. I’m quite proud of him.” Andrew waxes poetic about his brother thus: “We don’t always agree, but we trust each other’s instincts for the benefit of our music, and both of us have our stamp on every tune.” Frank Sharpe would be proud of his grandsons, just as he himself returned to performing later in life for the thrill of it after raising his own family. One of Frank’s many rewards for his music was a tiny medallion that Antony now wears on a chain around his neck. From Hertfordshire to Huntsville, Antony and Andrew Sharpe have absorbed the gift of music passed down to them and continue to give back in so many ways. Toy Shop can be reached via their website, located at www.toy-shop.us. page 35 Photos courtesy of Paula Posey page 36