the magazine as a pdf

Transcription

#20 our style is legendary
Neville Staple of
The Specials
Shopping
Cappo
Nottingham
Hiphop
Miles Hunt
Loay Hady
al e
nt c s
re an ord
Pa uid w
G ad ide
b s
in
Notts Xmas
Decorations
New
Years
Eve
Dominic Minghella of BBC’s Nottingham
Events
Listings Guide
Robin Hood
contents
editorial
LeftLion Magazine Issue 20
December 2007-January 2008
20
14
06
04
May Contain Notts
Nottingham’s ‘Mr Sex’ with
a concentrated dollop of NG
News-flange
05
LeftEyeOn
The Queen of the Midlands,
encapsulated through the medium
of photography
06
Facing Mecca?
Our future dream is a shopping
scheme
08
09
10
A Canadian In New Basford
We submerge Rob in Trent FM until
his lungs burst and his ears drown
in rubbish
The Staple Diet
A very Special interview with the
rudest singer of them all
Cappo
The golden condor of Nottingham
hiphop is home to roost
12
The A-Z Of Nottingham Hiphop
The home of the UK scene, from
back to front
26
Out And About
The Market Bar, Confetti ICT,
Richer Sounds and Lace
14
A Songwriter’s Tale
The lead singer of The Wonder Stuff
makes his long-awaited return
27
Sorry, I Don’t Speak Geek
Our team of SpodBusters make their
magazine debut.
16
Hady Character
Young local author bringing a novel
and Fresher approach
28
Nottingham Events Listings
Seven pages of what’s what in Notts
19
Reinventing The Legend
The man behind the new BBC set of
Merry Men reveals all
35
LeftLion Pub Quiz
Because the biggest erogenous
zone is your brain
20
Do You Want Deccing?
Because if you’re gonna ruin your
tree with tat, make it our tat
36
Oh Nottingham, Is Full Of Fun
James Walker went to a Forest
match and got well into it
23
Artist Profiles
Joseph Kelly, Dan Toporowski,
Rachel Parry and Samuel Mercer
37
Write Lion
The best scribblings on our
creative writing forum
25
LeftLion Bands
Pennyblack, Rebel Soul Parade, Kids
In Tracksuits and Yunioshi
38
Rocky Horrorscopes
Roger Mean, Rob White and
Notts Trumps go off on one
Deputy Editors
Al Needham ([email protected])
Nathan Miller ([email protected])
Technical Director
Alan Gilby ([email protected])
Listings Editors
Tim Bates ([email protected])
Florence Gohard ([email protected])
Photography Editor
Dominic Henry ([email protected])
Correspondence Address
LeftLion has moved. Our new address is:
LeftLion, care of Stone Soup, The Oldknows
Factory, St Anns Hill Road, NG3 4GP
Theatre Editor
Adrian Bhagat ([email protected])
Community Editor
Charlotte Kingsbury ([email protected])
Cover Illustration
Si Mitchell
Literature Editor
James Walker ([email protected])
Contributors
Colin The Geek
Ian Kingsbury
Kristi Genovese
Miles Hunt
Roger Mean
Music Editors
Natasha Chowdhury ([email protected])
Robojude ([email protected])
Before I goo back to wok, I hope you don’t mind me bigging
up everyone involved wi’ LeftLion, from folk like Reason,
Ben and Jared who wok theirsen ragged gerrin’ it together
to all the people who write and mek pictures for it, to the
youths who gerrit aht the door and drag it rahnd tahn, to all
the places that stock it and advertise in it. Sneinta reckons
you’ve bin so good this year that it’s Ralleh Choppers all
rahnd!
David Blenkey
Art Director
Legal Guru
Amanda Ball
Illustrators
Ash Dilks
Kim Thompson
Mark Mackay
Michael Lomon
Rikki Marr
Rob White
Art Editor
Amanda Young ([email protected])
Norroneh that, but there’s all yer usual faves, all put
together by people who love their tahn. Rob Cutforth’s
been in a right mither after listening to Jo and Twiggeh,
Alan and Little Timmeh have saved you a right job wi’ their
listings sections, they’ll be getting an extra satsuma in their
stockings this year. Amanda has had a wod wi’ some topdrawer local artists, and Mr Sex is chelping off again (and
by the way, my elves have refused point-blank to mek you a
Su Pollard sex doll, you chatteh bogger).
Sound Bloke
Mike Cheque
‘Each day a few more lies eat into the seed with
which we are born, little institutional lies from
the print of newspapers, the shock waves of
television, and the sentimental cheats of the
movie screen.’
Norman Mailer (1923-2007)
Art Director
David Blenkey ([email protected])
Cos I’m well into me beats, I’m right chuffed that Cappo’s
gerring back on it, and there’s a skill interview wi’ him in
this issue, along wi’ a big shaht aht to all Nottingham barspitters dem. Keep it Notts, ducks, yer know Sneinta got yer
back! It’s mint to see Miles Hunt back again, along wi’ folk
like Neville Staple aht the Specials and the bloke who made
the latest Robin Hood show on telleh.
Sneinta
Photographers
Al Greer
Bobby G
Dom Henry
Jon Jordan
Jon Rouston
Marketing and Sales Manager
Ben Hacking ([email protected])
Obviousleh, there’s some youths in this issue of LeftLion
who are gonna get summat very nice in their stockings this
year, what with the latest issue being so mint. Little Rikki
Marr has cum aht wi’ some bleddy loveleh Xmas deccos in
the centrespread, which I’ll be cutting aht and sticking on
us tree, like. I’m also dead glad to see that there’s summat
abaht shopping in this issue, because folk are forgetting
what Christmas is abaht if you ask me: stop being so
consumerist, you batchy bleeders, and support your local
shops. I’m bleddy sick of snot-nosed youths asking for chain
rammell. You get meh?.
Anyroad up, I’m off nah. Mek sure you behave yoursen,
don’t get too kaylide, and mek sure you leave a nice glass
o’ Taboo and some peas aht before yer goo to bed on Xmas
Eve. You get meh?
credits
Editor
Jared Wilson ([email protected])
Hoho wi’ yersen, youths! Nottingham Santa here, Sneinta, if
you will, tekkin’ a break from us sweatshop, putting me feet
up on an elf, and gooin’ through me list to see whose been
naughteh and who’s been nice this year, before I cum dahn
yer chimneh.
If you would like to reach our readers by
advertising your company in these pages
please contact Ben on 07843 944910 or email
[email protected]
LeftLion has an estimated readership of 40,000
in the city of Nottingham. In November 2007
LeftLion.co.uk received over 500,000 page views.
This magazine is printed on paper sourced from
sustainable forests. Our printers are ISO 14001
certified by the British Accreditation Bureau for
their environmental management system.
Dave designs this magazine,
commissions the illustrations
and occasionally writes and
draws the odd bit for it.
When he’s not scratching
his head over which font to
use, he’s probably trying
to master screenprinting.
[email protected]
Rob White
Illustrator
Rob White is an illustrator who
does The Arthole section of this
magazine and random other
scribbles here and there. He’s
designed album covers for Bent,
T-shirts for Paul Smith and was
exhibited in the Best of British
Contemporary Illustration 2007
annual and exhibition. Check
his website for hours of fun.
www.thearthole.co.uk
www.leftlion.co.uk/issue20
3
MAY CONTAIN
NOTTS
with Nottingham’s
‘Mr. Sex’ Al Needham
FOREST AT THE TOP OF LEAGUE ONE
‘ARREST TABLE’
October-November 2007
www.leftlion.co.uk/blog
illustration: Mark Mackay
Get in! At least we’re top of the table for something.
Baron von Carlton
Surely Forest have more fans than anybody else in
the league? Surely a percentage of arrests against
attendance would be a better judge?
Spectrum HQ
Don’t know about thugs, but there’s plenty of
moaning old gets where I sit, main stand. Would’ve
thought most of them were too old to fight.
mr.bear
As soon as Aggravated Bitterness becomes an
arrestable offence, Notts will be challenging for
honours once more.
Lord of the Nish
Well, we’ve got bitterness and Forest have got
arrogance, so that evens things up.
Stillman
This is our third season in League One... I
guarantee you most of our arrogance has dissolved
into bitterness.
Beast of the Bay
Another bleeding ASBO maths monkey banging
the keys on the stats machine giving Notts a bad
name. Surely any journo worth his salt wouldn’t
publish these sorts of loaded stats?
Seismik Si
LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION:
NOTTINGHAM vs. RUSHCLIFFE
I suggest West Bridgford, Ruddington, Bingham etc
are changed to RFF postcodes and recognized as
Rushcliffe not Nottingham, dissociating ourselves
with our crime ridden neighbours!
NCTRCROOKS
Keep Rushcliffe, I’ll stick with the criminals.
oxygenthievez
And Ruddington recently had a £6.4m drug raid.
And I know 3 people in Ruddington burgled
recently. And at the weekend Rudd fills with
scallies from the big C next door. You don’t need to
change much to affluent to get effluent.
MrGeesBigCircus
Just move Rushcliffe to bloody Surrey, it’s full of
NIMBY southerners anyway.
Badgaaar
The only good thing about Rushcliffe is the
swimming pool. I grew up in Sherwood, went to
school on the edge of Bestwood Estate, college
in Bilborough and have mostly worked in the city
centre. I’ve never felt threatened and have never
been a victim of any kind of crime in any of these
areas.
theonelikethe
I lived in good ole Rushcliffe Borough for the first
20 years of my life and it is lovely, nice parks,
shops wonderful, pity 90% of the population are up
themself wankers with more money than sense.
Give me hobos, junkies and muggers any day. (P.s.
Mum, Dad, Gran, all those people who looked after
me when I was a kid: I don’t mean you I mean your
neighbours.)
TheMaze
1 October
Secret files released by the National Archives on Rudolf Hess include
a letter from a Nottingham bloke offering cheery good wishes to
Hitler’s right-hand man, along with a photo of his kids holding up
a model Zeppelin. ‘It’s like getting the autograph of an Australian
cricketer - you may not like things to do with his personal life and you
have to strike a balance in getting their signature’ he said to the Post,
whilst presumably popping a photo of his granddaughters throwing
an Airfix plane at a Jenga stack in the post for Osama.
2 October
Broadway holds a gala night for Control, to celebrate local actors
copping a break and the fact that someone from a production
company drove into Lenton, looked through a square made from
their thumbs and index fingers, and said ‘Hmmm…yes…this looks
exactly like the sort of depressing shithole where a miserable Indie
twat with a Nazi fixation would want to top himself’.
3 October
The long-predicted global recession begins to bite. House repossessions
in America reach an all-time high. The Dollar hit record lows against the
Euro. UK house prices slow down. A pot of mushy peas at Goose Fair’s
dedicated pea stall is jacked up to one pound twenty.
4 October
The residents of Wollaton pull back their lace curtains at 2am
to be greeted with the sight of something out of The Sweeney,
discovering a bleddy big burning Mercedes containing a
stabbing victim. Turns out that said victim had previous for using
a golf course in Leicester as a front for a massive drugs operation
and had buried vast quantities of pills and powders under the
fairways and greens. Warning to anyone pulling on diamond
jumpers and dragging their irons out the loft; he also guarded said
stashes with explosive trip wires.
5 October
Nottingham City Transport announces the axing of their regular
Night Bus service, weeing in the face of everyone who works in
this so-called 24-hour city who quite liked getting home from their
shift without having their wallets raped by a cabbie. Sigh.
12 October
The head chocolate-maker at Thorntons resigns after getting
caught squishing the truffles at Hotel Chocolat. Amazingly, it’s
the top story on Central News East, outranking the small matter
of a shooting in St Anns. Imagine you’re that poor sod who got
shot; laid up in the QMC, with your only consolation being the
fact you’re going to be the most important person in Notts at 6pm,
only to see them banging on about some gimp mashing up some
expensive tuffehs. And they wonder why no-one gives a toss
about the forthcoming axing of Central News East.
15 October
Those two pissy-knickered house-shitbags on Channel 4 find
a new way to raise Nottingham to fourth in the latest edition
of The Worst Places To Live If You’re The Kind Of Middle-Class
House Price-Obsessed Wankstain Who Watches Shitty Programmes
Like This On Channel Four Because You’re Scared To Go Out, by
annexing Rushcliffe. Next year they’ll grant independence to The
Park and Hockley in an attempt to get us to the top. That bald
cock and his hateful pinch-faced bint of an assistant claim that
Mansfield is a better place to live by seven whole places, which is
all you need to know, really.
16 October
Notts County finally sack the former (and soon to be) building
site worker Steve Thompson after sinking to the bottom of
Division Four. They install Ian McParland as the new boss and go
on a decent run.
4
19 October
The Variety, the club in Radford, which for over 40 years was the only
place in Nottingham where you could play bingo with strippers from
Matlock, finally closes down for good. Another part of Nottingham’s
soul disappears forever, and if you didn’t go, you’ll never know.
24 October
A Cinderhill factory worker gets shamed, due to spending £500
on having a two-foot tattoo of Dumbledore on his back, only for
said imaginary wizard who doesn’t exist to be outed by JK
Rowling. ‘It’s been terrible’, he says to The Sun. ‘I’ve always liked
Dumbledore, but not in that way’. Jesus in a jumpsuit, it’s come to
summat when a man can use a national newspaper to point out that
he doesn’t want to have bum-sex with a wizard in a kid’s book.
29 October
Wet Wet Wet (ask yer mam) play a one-off gig at the Hard Rock
Café. Two weeks later, the Hard Rock Café goes out of business.
4 November
Forest’s projected move to a big new toilet in Clifton is nixed
by the City Council, who want a location nearer the city centre.
I know just the place; right next to Trent Bridge. Just behind the
Southbank Bar.
5 November
Truants at Arnold Hill School bash their faces against the nearest
available wall when it turns out that a stripper puts in a guest
appearance at a drama class for some lad’s birthday. The school
thought about calling in the police, but were worried that they’d
only pull the dinner ladies over the counter, grind their crotches
into their faces to Hot Stuff by Donna Summer, and make the
headmistress suck whipped cream off their truncheons.
7 November
Twiggy and Jo win an award for Best European Breakfast Show.
Christ on a crisp packet, who were they up against? A monkey
banging on a saucepan in Oslo, and someone drilling holes into
farm animals in Bucharest?
9 November
A local youth is up in court for reacting to his mate getting stabbed
to death in a city centre venue by robbing the till of £324 (and yes,
you’ll note he even took some pound coins). Obviously, he needed
all those notes to staunch the wounds, a clearly-marked first aid kit
evidently not being available.
13 November
Whoever is employed by the Post to sit on YouTube all day typing
‘Nottingham’, ‘Guns’ and ‘Oh My God, They’re All Going To Murder
Us In Our Beds’ finally hits paydirt when they uncover a video
of some lads called the Millz Taliban waving guns about and
smoking weed. Note to local gang members: don’t name yourself
after a religious group that outlaws everything you like doing.
17 November
The latest local crackdown on beggars in town turns up a man
whose was identified as dead and cremated by his own mam in
Manchester a month previously. Hopefully, the coppers have also
got that bastard who pretends to be a Big Issue seller and tries to flog
LeftLion for a quid, claiming that we’ve been bought out by them.
19 November
A 26 year-old scamp from Bulwell is hit with an ASBO that bans
him from every pub in Greater Nottingham bar five, for such
japes as waving an air pistol in one pub and puncturing someone’s
lung with a fork in another. Every pub in Notts minus five equals
a shitload of pubs, making it the biggest bar-out in history and
worthy of a place in the Guinness Book of Records.
LeftEyeOn
Some choice cuts from our online galleries at www.leftlion.co.uk
Bison do Oxjam - Sheffield band Bison put on some ska sounds
for Nottingham Oxjam 2007 - Al Greer
Core Blimey - A packed Maze crowd lets loose to the juice of
Isreali funksters The Apples... - Dave Blenkey
Ying @ Junktion 7 - Local artist Ying performed some
thoughtful folk for October’s Oxjam - Al Greer
ImperialTeadBreak - Imperial troops stopping for a tea break at
Gamecity’s October talks, no doubt jealous about the new Wii
lightsaber being demonstrated - Jon Jordan
Goose Fair Flyers - Some people just aren’t content with mushy
peas and candyfloss, taken at October’s Goose Fair - Jon Rouston
TheLeadingMan - Surrealism is alive and well and being filmed
in a graveyard near you - Bobby G
Council Tax Well Spent - Always good is this, like a mini goose
fair with explosives. Nottingham’s annual firework display is
held at the Forest Recreation Ground - Jon Rouston
FishMansArmy - Fish Man in Tha House! we know he’s got lady
admirers but this takes the cake, taken at Nottingham’s premier
pub quiz, held at the Golden Fleece every Wednesday night.
- Dom Henry
MrSexMings - Nottingham’s Mr Sex gets all merciless for the
LeftLion fancy dress Halloween pub quiz - Dom Henry
5
Shop Will Eat Itself
Nottingham, as you may have been told a million times or so, is a
‘Retail Mecca’. But is that necessarily a good thing, and what does
it actually mean?
words: Ian Kingsbury
images: Ash Dilks
The year is 1907. You’re strolling through a British town centre on
a bustling Saturday. As you pass A. C. Prentiss, the greengrocer,
you give a hearty hail to your old chum Arthur Spurrington,
proprietor of Spurrington Ironmongery. You have no iron to mong,
so you pass jauntily by. But which city are you in? Are you blind
and feeble of mind? This is Nottingham of course; where else
would you find Messrs. Prentiss and Spurrington?
The year is 2007. You’re strolling through a British town centre
on a bustling Saturday. As you pass TK Maxx, you throw an
indignant V-sign at a hoodlum who has just impugned your
intellect very loudly from the doorway of a Greggs. You walk on,
past HMV and Argos. But which city are you in? Are you joking?
This could be anywhere in Britain.
It‘s becoming a cliché to suggest that all British high streets
look identical these days, with any last pigments of local colour
washed away by the identikit, homogenised shopping experience
offered by chain stores. But, as we’re constantly being told, we
will see greater personal and civic advantages due to a stronger
economy and supposedly increasing consumer choice.
Nottingham in particular is positioning itself as a (cringe) ‘Retail
Mecca’. According to Experian, almost 25 million shoppers
visit Nottingham each year to browse the approximately 1,400
retail outlets our city has to offer. In 2007, Nottingham was
declared fifth in the UK shopping league, behind London,
Glasgow, Birmingham and Manchester. We’ve already got two
big shopping centres, the Victoria Centre and the soon-to-berevamped Broadmarsh. There are also more niche (i.e. posher)
ones in the Exchange Arcade and the Flying Horse Walk. We’re
also going to have two brand new ones, in the shape of Trinity
Square and The Pod, which will increase the shopping area in
the city centre by 28% to 4.3 million square feet. But do we really
need more places to part with our hard-earned wonga and how
is it going to change the city?
6
I recently sat in on a job interview at work. In response to the
question ‘What are your hobbies?’ the mousy waif opposite
offered ‘shopping’ as her somewhat timorous response. As
vapid and depressing as this might seem, shopping really does
constitute the greater part of many peoples’ lives. On a deep
level, retail therapy probably satisfies some innate instinct;
a hangover from our hunter-gatherer roots, tacked on to our
recently-acquired desire for status symbols and personal
identity. But when your city has the same merchandise as every
other place, more choice suddenly seems like less.
For example, the only kind of shopping in which I can really
invest my time, heart and cash is buying music. I regularly lose
whole afternoons bothering the racks of CDs in that nationallyrespected Aladdin’s cave of vibes Selectadisc. For me, buying
music is all about the thrill of the hunt; turning up obscure bands
and artists that you take a punt on and fall in love with for the
rest of your life. But with downloads, cheap CDs in supermarkets
and megastores such as Virgin and HMV, small independent
music shops are on the wane. Derby’s last indie record store
announced its closure only last month. Its not just record shops;
all independently-owned shops are a dying breed in the city,
struggling to compete with the high street behemoths.
Obviously, the news isn’t all corporate and grim. Hockley, known
as the ‘Soho of Nottingham’ (by people who have obviously
have never been to Soho), is a heartland of alternative lifestyle
shops, independent retailers and excellent eateries. A smallscale version of Manchester’s Northern Quarter or The Lanes
in Brighton, it represents everything that Nottingham shopping
used to have and could have again; choice, style, a strong
identity, and a sense of place.
So what of the future? It goes without saying that a thriving
retail sector is central to the health of the national economy,
but it’s not exactly the steadiest foundation to build a city
upon, especially if, like Nottingham, you already rely so hard
on the night-time economy. After all, when the country goes
into recession, the first two things that people cut down on are
shopping and going out. Of course, if this country had retained
its manufacturing base, our economy wouldn’t depend on
the high street. Consider the case of China, whose emergent
status as a global political giant is predicated on a break-neck
economic growth achieved because China makes things and
sells things. We, on the other hand, merely buy things and sell
them to ourselves… which is a pretty stupid economic model
when you think about it.
Sadly, the concept of Nottingham as a regional manufacturing
powerhouse has gone, presumably for ever and the void has to
be filled with something. So it’s hello to the vast regeneration
of Nottingham, which includes a mind-liquefying £400m
investment for the expansion of the Broadmarsh Centre, which
should see it triple (triple!) in size. Unless they intend to install
something massive and fun, like a tropical-themed indoor
swimming pool with wave machines, then I personally can’t
understand the need for yet more retail space to be set aside
for even more chain stores in Nottingham. You end up thinking
about what £400m could do for Nottingham if it was put into
local schools, or any one of our inner-city estates, or towards jobs
that provided more stimulation than standing behind a till for
seven hours a day.
In any case, maybe we’ve already missed the boat. With
the exponential growth in internet retailers, you could quite
feasibly become an exclusively virtual shopper, with Tesco
delivering your food, the Freeman’s Catalogue delivering your
brogues and angora sweaters and Argos and Ebay providing
everything else at a cheaper price. With a long-predicted
threatening to rear its ugly head and the slowing down of UK
house prices, the new Megamarsh could quite easily end up as
Europe’s biggest pound shop.
What we’d like to see in Nottingham
A proper cool flea market - a more
boho Viccy Market, run by locals,
selling artwork, original one-off
clothing, knicks and knacks. Stick it
in the old Odeon Cinema on Angel
Row that’s been empty for years
and it’d be like Afflecks Palace in
Manchester.
Continuing pedestrianisation of the
City Centre. We like it. We want more.
The new Broadmarsh Centre having
its own identity. We don’t want
another Viccy Centre. Actually, we
don’t want the same old Broadmarsh
but bigger either.
A year-round international market.
The German Market is ace, but why
restrict it to once a year when there’s
so much retail space knocking about?
A real indoor food court, like the
Camden International Food Market,
would inject the dose of continental
culture developers and locals are
craving, without it being ruined by
our distinctly uncontinental weather.
More Wilkos. Always useful and born
in the East Midlands. Nuff said.
No more sport shops that don’t sell
any real sporting equipment. Or
repetitions of the same chain stores
we already have.
No more boasting about being a
retail mecca - the real ones don’t feel
the need to brag.
A total ban on those adverts on the
back of buses from Mansfield that
invite the locals to ‘Shop Posh’. It
embarrasses us all.
Some Factoids
Researchers have found that light purple is the colour
most likely to induce us to spend money.
The least lucrative place to open up a shop is right
next-door to a bank.
Shopping is about discovering new things; discovering
new things is exciting; excitement floods the brain
with the feel good hormone Dopamine. So, if you love
shopping, you’re really just a well-groomed junkie.
Indie
Shopping
in Notts
a few favourites...
In 1964, West Bridgford became the site of the UK’s first
major out-of-town shopping development. Sorry, that
one was a bit dull.
Daphne’s Handbag
67 Mansfield Road
Selectadisc
19-21 Market Street
A cracking little retro
boutique purveying a
veritable smorgasbord of
vintage homeware, furniture
and clothing dating from the
1970s.
With a huge range of music
on vinyl and CD, Selectadisc
has been knocking allcomers into a cocked hat for
over 40 years.
Jermy and Westerman Antiquarian
and Second Hand Bookshop
203 Mansfield Road
In the UK, goods totalling £205 million were shoplifted
last year. This figure only reflects the number of crimes
actually detected and prosecuted. According to the
Nottingham-based Centre for Retail Research, in 2006
stock loss as a result of crime cost each one of us £72.56.
Games Workshop
34 Friar Lane
Luna
139 Lower Parliament Street
Ace shop, with their head office
probably the coolest place to work
at in Notts, as they have their own
Elven drinking hall on site with
mounted gargoyle heads.
Crammed to the gills with antiquarian
and second-hand books, this is a
bibliophile’s nirvana. Also see their
sister store Geoff Blore, further up the
road into Sherwood.
The undisputed champions of knickyknackery in this here town, covering
all eras and tastes.
Baklash
2 Norfolk Place
Dave Mann Music
123-125 Mansfield Road
It’s possible that you’ve never
noticed Baklash, which is hidden
away opposite Langtry’s pub and the
Theatre Royal. It stocks all manner of
retro clothing and other delights.
Established in 1970, this independent
musical instrument shop specialise in
acoustic guitars, mandolins, banjos,
ukuleles and orchestral strings. They
also do repairs.
Details
www.detailsstore.co.uk
Swooping people of Notts and the
world off their feet with cuteness, and
currently exhibiting at Kismet Gallery
in New York, this Nottingham-based
on-line independent store features cute
and whimsical handmade creations
from soft sculptures, art, and clay
figurines to decal porcelain homeware.
So you don’t even have to go into taahn
to get your goodies.
Wild Clothing
4-6 Broad Street
Oh My Gosh
43 Mansfield Road
Since 1982 Wild Clothing has been
a beacon for fans of vintage threads,
which now hang alongside more
modern sartorials. They now also
have a branch on Market Street
called Wilder.
Purveyors of quality hiphop, DnB,
techno, breaks, dubstep and more.
Vinyl and equipment are a speciality.
Robs Records
Hurt’s Yard
The Bead Shop
7 Market Street
Living proof that you can still run your
own independent specialist concern in
the middle of town.
An institution for vinyl junkies. More
records than you can believe in such
a small space. The man behind the
shop is also a well known Northern
soul DJ.
7
Rob Cutforth
submerged his head
into the metal box
of rubbish music
and soul-destroying
prattle that is Trent
FM, because we
made him.
Aren’t we nasty?
When LeftLion asked me to spend a week
listening to the Jo and Twiggy show on Trent
FM for this column, I didn’t really know what
to make of it. I’ve never been a fan of morning
radio. It comes on early in the morning, the
music is atrocious and the scripted banter makes
me want to stab myself in the ear with an ice
pick. The last thing I want to hear when I awake
is some chirpy twat’s cheesy jokes, followed by
some spoiled teenaged brat’s pop song about
how much her million-dollar life sucks.
However, the first day of listening to Jo and
Twiggy had me thinking they were quite
charming. Dim, but charming. Like an old,
arthritic mutt that you’ve had since you were a
kid, who would roll over onto its back looking for
a tummy-rub from a burglar. It might sound like
it’s being recorded in someone’s garden shed,
but it’s nice to hear a vaguely local accent on the
radio for once. Also, it’s certainly better than the
honk-honk-wocka-wocka bullshit that is North
American morning radio. Or so I thought…
My introduction to Twiggy begins with a
story about his family trip to a stately home.
He moans that, after paying for admission,
food and parking, he was out close to £50.
My God, I think to myself; this story could’ve
come directly out of my mouth. He then does
this thing called Twiggy’s Songbook, where he
sings excerpts from a book to a popular tune
8
and asks callers to guess what the song is. In
this case it’s a book on raft-building sung to I
Will Survive. I laugh my ass off. I call LeftLion
and warn them that I am in serious danger of
becoming a Twiggy fan.
Having said that, I don’t have much time for
Jo. The woman has (by her own admission)
never been in a relationship, lives with her
mother and is obsessed with the X Factor. She’s
not exactly what one would call complex and
strikes me as the type of woman who goes to
McDonald’s in Mickey Mouse sweatpants and
orders a Big Mac and a Diet Coke, thinking
they balance each other out. But like I said,
this is morning radio; complaining about it
is like beating up a kid in a wheelchair, or
going to Rocky IV and complaining about the
monosyllabic dialogue.
The next morning rolls around, and I find myself
actually looking forward to the show, waiting
to hear what Twiggy is going to do for his
songbook. I even start referring to it as ‘the
Songbook’, as I feel Twiggy and I are now good
buds. Twiggy doesn’t disappoint; his singing of
The Mysteries of Egypt to Wake Me Up Before
You Go-Go is fantastic. Afterwards, he disses
Jo for liking the X Factor (yes, she fucking
brought that up again) by saying it exploits
people. Testify, brother!
I’m thinking about getting an ‘I ♥ Twiggy’ tshirt printed up until he says a couple of things
that give us a glimpse into his dark side. He
admits to liking James Blunt and refers to the
Daily Mail as ‘The Mail’. Liking James Blunt
is pretty sad, but referring to the Daily Mail as
‘The Mail’ is downright crazy. It’s like referring
to Mein Kampf as ‘ol’ Kampfy’. Alarm bells start
ringing, but I ignore them. This is the happy
guy that tells jokes to children and sings silly
songs! Daily Mail reader or no, I’m willing to cut
the brother some slack.
Then ‘Father Twiggy’ makes an appearance. He
recites a poem with a lisping Irish accent, dissing
Gordon Brown and the inheritance tax, while
pumping up the tories and David Cameron. If
that isn’t bad enough, he finishes it with ‘I once
bit the pillow when I was on a man-date.’
Did I just hear that right? Pillow-biter? I’m all
for taking the piss out of people, but resorting
to homophobic slurs? Damn, that stopped being
funny some time in the early eighties, didn’t
he get the memo? I imagine many of Twiggy’s
favourite jokes start with ‘A poof, a Rabbi and a
Polack guy walk into a bar...’
Listening to the show seems less of a joy and
more of a chore after that. I set my computer
up to record the next three shows and listen to
them at once, just to get it over with as quickly
as possible. In that time, he and Jo take potshots at gays twice more, slight the Chinese,
point out that the French ate their own faeces,
make a couple of tit jokes and then have the
nerve to call Americans ‘hillbillies’.
I’d been told by LeftLion that this show has
won a Sony breakfast show award and think to
myself ‘who listens to this shit?’ The minute the
question passes my lips, it is promptly answered
by a caller who says she thinks Posh Spice ‘looks
good’. I thought James Blunt fans were rare, but
a Posh Spice fan? Give me strength!
I have been listening for three hours straight,
skipping past the commercials, music and
weather reports, when my wife comes in and
puts her arms around me. I shrug her off and
snap, ‘Go away! I’m doing something!’ It’s then
that I realise just how angry Twiggy and Jo are
making me. My teeth are clenched and I have
the mouse in a death grip. I have a few more
hours to listen to, but I turn it off, go downstairs
and apologise to my wife instead.
She says I am hereafter not allowed to listen
to Jo and Twiggy anymore. She has nothing to
worry about.
Read more of Rob’s rantings at
www.leftlion.co.uk/community
and www.canuckistani.com
Two-tone pioneer
Neville Staple is on
the road. This isn’t a
Fun Boy Three or The
Specials convoy. The
musical legend sits
in the driver’s seat,
ready to bring his
solo project to your
hometown.
words: Robojude
What’s going on?
Well, right now I’m in the middle of finishing
off an album. I’ve been in the studio and have
just finished writing it. I’m on tour constantly. I
am looking forward to going to Australia at the
end of the year and hopefully New Zealand. It’s
one long big tour for me... and then there’s a
tour with The Beat as well! I’ve never stopped
working! I was working all the time when I
was in America and then I came over here. I’ve
been here now nearly three and a half years
and it’s taken me this time to get my own name
established, you know?
What does the term ‘rude boy’ mean to you
and how as it evolved?
Rude boy could mean well, two different types
of person; rude as in cheeky and rude as in
being a bad boy. I think I fall under the first one
(laughs). For me it’s not about being a bad bad
boy, you know? Jack the lad or cheeky lad... It’s
just speaking your mind.
If someone lent you a time machine, what is
the first thing you would do with it?
I’d go back to my school days and mess
around again.
What is the first gig you would go to in it?
James Brown when he was really hot! Around
the time he was first getting big. He was an
entertainer, you know? That’s what I do, I
entertain.
What was the last music you found truly
inspirational?
Bloody hell. Alright... Neh... I’d be lying I can’t
remember, honest to god.
(The interview is interrupted by a builder
arriving. Neville is trying to find the keys which
open his front door.)
Sorry about that. Just having my bathroom and
living room done.
What was the last thing that made you laugh?
Bloody hell... I can’t bloody remember! It’s been so
long (laughs). Write that in, that I couldn’t remember.
Well, you just made me laugh... there you go.
When performing live, have you ever done or said
something that you really wished you hadn’t?
Yeah, erm... Nah, I can’t remember. There’s
probably loads of stuff I’ve said on stage and
regretted, but I just can’t remember any of it.
Thinking about it, it’s probably a good thing?
That’s just life... It’s just the way it goes. Do you
know what I mean?
The bands that you’ve been involved with
generally have short explosions of studio
recording energy. Is there a reason?
You know why though? Specials for instance, we
got so popular and the record companies and
everyone wanted to see us. So we was travelling
and travelling and we got burnt out. Then when
you’re living together like that, you know? Some
bands can cope with it... You just end up arguing.
It’s like a husbands and wives scenario when you’re
on the road. We used to do two shows a day!
Do you think there is such a thing as a
musical life-span?
No, not really. If you’re popular you’ll always
be popular, from Beethoven straight down. The
Rolling Stones for example, people will always
remember them and as for Lee Scratch Perry
he will always be remembered. Maybe not by
massive amounts of people, but his name will
always be there, you know?
What’s your secret?
Do you mean why does everybody still like
The Specials? Because at the time we were
something that people were waiting for. We
were singing about social issues. What was
affecting us, where we were living, and I
guess it touched the nerves of a lot of people in
different towns and cities and countries. Plus
it’s very powerful music when you’re there live.
So you’re there dancing and enjoying yourself
and when you get time or when you sit down
and chill out you listen to the words, you know?
Do you think that youth is a catalyst for creativity,
or does the best music come out of experience?
Experience! I think I’m getting better with
doing live stuff because of experience. You need
it! When I started I didn’t have experience, I
just learnt it over the years. I know much more
than I did then.
Do you think that overall the internet has had
a positive or a negative effect on the way that
people listen to music?
It’s moving with the times innit? I hardly watch
stuff on the TV, like MTV and that stuff. If I
do watch it, I watch it once a fucking month.
I hardly listen to radio. Internet, ha, I’m crap
at it, but that’s what the young kids are into
nowadays. I’m just an old fogey. I’m not used
to the internet to be honest with ya. I know it
helps to get your records and your name about.
But I have people to do that for me.
Is there anything you feel nostalgia for from
pre-internet days?
Erm... when you used to get into a band, you
used to know who the fuck they were. You
hear a band name now and you haven’t a clue
who they are! Everybody sounds the same.
Previously, you could tell different bands, I
mean, who was who.
Just out of interest what format is most of
your music on?
What you trying to say? 45s and LPs, why?
Have they changed it now? Buying vinyl used
to be nice you know.
If you could make music with absolutely
anyone, who would you choose and why?
Oh god, that’s a very difficult one you know.
I’ve played with Sly and Robbie. I wanted to
play with them. I’ve played on stage with them
and they’ve played with me on stage. I’ve done
Sting. It’s hard to say, there are so many people
I’d love to go on stage with. I would’ve loved
to have done it with The Clash, they’re my
favourite band of all time.
If there was a nuclear holocaust and you were
given the power to save just one city, which
one would you choose?
I’d save the place where my mum lives in
Jamaica.
What was the last book you read?
It was an Agatha Christie novel. I used to read
all of her books.
Is there anything you’d like to say to LeftLion
readers?
Come see me play... and check out my new
album when it comes out. That’s it!
Neville Staple is performing live in Nottingham
at The Maze on 14 December.
www.nevillestaple.co.uk
9
words: Jared Wilson
Notts is known internationally for its wealth of hiphop talent.
With so much competition it’s not easy to stand out around
here, but one guy who always has is Cappo. Despite still only
being in his late twenties, he’s been an integral part of the scene
for a decade. His debut album Spaz The World was released
internationally by Zebra Traffic and he’s worked with many of
the best in the UK and beyond. Known for his prolific material,
he’s been underground recently working on new material. We
caught up with him to find out more…
When did you start rapping?
I started at school, I used to write bars in media class with a
long time friend called Labels and also used to spend a lot of
time freestyling with Stryder and Labels in my garage. We would
record on an old tape player and spend ages finding samples off
old records and pause button looping them with drum breaks.
I was deep into graffiti as well, that’s where I first started
respecting hiphop and realising how important it was to me and
how much I wanted to be part of it. A few years later I saved up
and bought my MPC 2000XL, which I still use today. That’s when
I started concentrating solely on the music.
How did you get your first record deal?
In about ‘98 or ‘99, Zero Theory let me borrow his Ensoniq 16
Plus sampler for two weeks. I produced about fifteen tracks
and made a demo called The Cap Tape Vol. 1. I got about forty
pressed and sent them off to record labels and radio stations.
That’s how I got in touch with Son Records. They put me in
touch with Styly Cee. I met him at his house and we got on well,
we started making tracks together and he produced a track on
my first EP, and we’ve been tight ever since.
Styly has been something of a mentor to you…
He’s always been an influence in my music. When I first got to
know him he used to play me loads of original loops on vinyl that
hiphop producers had used, such as the Nas Illmatic album, and
I’d have to guess what tracks they were. Through him, I started
to get more live shows and meet artists like Blade and Joe
Buhdha and I appeared on Westwood. Working with Styly has
helped to establish my name and Son Records has put my work
out internationally in places like Japan.
Then you hooked up with the P Brothers…
We made the first EP Heavy Bronx Volume One and worked
together on festivals and shows. I used to just listen to them and
watch how they worked and take in as much as I could. A lot of
my production capabilities were learned by listening them. They
would always go on the turntables and cut up break beats before
they produced a track. They knew about the essence of hiphop
and it made me realise how deep the history was and how much
I had to learn. Every release was a solid progression for me,
building up to Spaz The World.
Tell us about that, your debut album…
It’s still the pinnacle of all my releases. It was really demanding
to make and is still the release I’m most proud of. When I hear it,
it still shocks me how the drums sound. When I look at my new
album I know I’ve got to put exactly the same amount of effort
into it, and combine that with the knowledge I have gained
since releasing Spaz The World which is why the new material is
taking a while.
When can we expect the new album?
There are always hurdles to overcome, but it’s been in the
pipeline for two years. I’ve been making beats and filing them
away and I’ve got about ten or eleven tracks that are almost
there. When I get into the full process of writing the lyrics, I
want to travel around Nottingham like I used to and spit bars
with everyone. So I can get my mind running to full capacity.
I’d be happy for it to be heard and bought by as many people
as possible, but the main thing is that the real hiphop heads in
Britain, Europe and especially in the USA get to hear and know
that it follows the protocol of how to make real hiphop with no ifs
or buts or compromises.
After Spaz The World, you made the two Get Out albums…
Yeah, we made them so I’d have something to sell at shows. I
used to go round to Zero Theory’s house and write rhymes while
he would make the beat from scratch. We made thirty songs for
the first and the second was made a couple of months after that
was released. I passed on a copy of the second to Rob Life at the
Breakin’ Bread label and they took a selection and released the
Get Out EP on vinyl.
Tell us about the people you’re working with at the moment…
I’m always working with Weight Bench and Rukus Regardless,
who’s got three albums out called Code Of Practice 1, 2 and 3,
which I made all the beats for and Midnyte who has an album
called Revision. Me and Konny Kon have also been working on
new material. Styly Cee has produced three burners for a new
EP we’re going to release called The H Bomb which I’m very
proud of. I’ve been writing to a new track for ED 209’s new
project and I’ve also been working with First Blood for a track on
their album. I’m happy to work with people I trust and know are
talented. It’s like a never-ending catalyst for me.
What was it like going on tour with The Herbaliser?
It was a real eye-opener to work with people who have been
monetarily successful in the UK music industry. By the time I
met them, they were already well-established, so being able to
record and tour with them and see how the cogs work on a large
scale tour was an honour. We played Belgium, Ireland, Glasgow,
Manchester, France, Slovakia and festivals all over the place. I
was just happy to be there, it was such a learning process.
Tell us about your current mix tape…
The Directors Commentary Vol.1 is my history tape. It’s 24 tracks
and lasts over an hour. It spans almost a decade of my music
and features every section of my career. I had a lot of music
that hadn’t been heard, but I felt needed to be released, so I did
a juxtaposition of tracks from past to present with some new
freestyles and exclusives on it as well. It features work I did
way back in ‘99 with DJ Prime, unreleased gems with Styly Cee,
Zero Theory and ED209, and also has a track I made with The
Herbaliser and some tracks from my Resilience EP. It features
Rukus regardless, Midnyte and Konny Kon. It also contains demo
tracks from Spaz The World produced by the Akai Professionals
that didn’t make the album but which I felt needed to be heard.
Anything you’d like to say to LeftLion readers?
My new album is in its final stages now and I’m working harder
than ever towards it. The plans are in action, the cogs in the
machine are working and I’m at a good point at the moment.
Look out for the new Weight Bench compilation coming soon.
Capps is back in the building…
The Directors Commentary Volume One
is available now from cappomixtape.com
10
n
s:
ord
ilso
W
d
e
Jar
w
,
Notts is well known across the country for punching above it s weight in
the UK hiphop scene. From some of the best DJs and MCs, to some well known
breakdancers and respected graffiti artists, we got all the style. LeftLion
takes you on an alphabetical journey through the local scene.
Airwaves
Camouflage
Community and pirate radio stations are always
a foundation of the local scene, usually because
mainstreams seem to think the genre begins and ends with
50 Cent. These days in Notts it’s all about Kemet FM, but back
in the day it was Heatwave, Rave FM, Touch, Hot Wax, Dance,
Energy Rush, Globe, Horizon, Power, Scene FM and Freeze.
the Elementz
One of Nottingham’s best-loved hiphop and breaks
nights which has been running strong for over four
years now. They’ve featured everyone from Plan B to Rahzel
to Cappo, as well as loads of local talent.
Samurais of sound Liati and Zoutr have recorded with
some of the UK’s best including Taskforce, Rukus and
Skinnyman. They’ve also worked extensively with local
favourites like Scorzayzee, Karizma and Emcee Killa.
www.camouflage-events.com
www.theelementz.co.uk
www.kemetradio.com
Dealmaker Records
Big Trev
Trevor Rose is one of
the godfathers of the
Nottingham scene, and runs
the community music studios
in St Anns. Many of the
other people mentioned here
wouldn’t be where they are
without his guidance.
www.myspace.com/bigtrevs
12
Hardworking local label with a
quality of output that cannot be
tested. If we printed their whole artist
roster then it would fill the page on its own,
so check their website (dealmakerrecords.
com) and if you want recording time visit
their new studio opposite the Broadway.
Frederick Nelson (aka Daddy Freddy)
Officially the world’s fastest rapper after an
appearance with Roy Castle on TV’s Record Breakers
and a true star of the UK jungle and reggae scenes. Still a
Nottingham resident after all these years…
www.daddyfreddy.net
www.dealmakerrecords.com
images: David Blenkey (Big Trev), Rikki Marr (Dealmaker and
Non-Thespian), Andrew Hemsley (Kids in Tracksuits),
David Bowen (Styly Cee), Dom Henry (Pete First Blood), Al Greer
(Petebox), Jared Wilson (Smokes and Bluntz), Sophie Cann (XS:
GrandSlam magazine
The follow up to the equally
brilliant Big Daddy magazine,
which featured a good balance of
soul and hiphop. Both hailed from
Nottingham and had international
circulation. Sadly missed.
Back issues still available from
www.suspect-packages.com
Non-Thespian
Tusken Coalition
The scientific side of local hiphop with Duke01,
777, Johnny Crump, Dwyzak and Siobhan Lynch.
They’ve changed their
line-up a bit along the
years, but believe it or
not they were on the bill
at the first ever Detonate
night! That’s over eight
years ago now…
Rowdy and newly-reformed collective who feature
Lethargy, Blugrass (also in BluMonkey), Kworyl,
Dieverse and GZ. The original line-up included Sinic (vocalist
from local heavy metal band Iron Monkey, who died way too
young). Look out for their new album out now.
www.tuskencoalition.co.uk
www.non-thespian.com
UK Takeover
Heavy Bronx
The label and sometime moniker of The P Brothers,
Paul S and Ivory. Both former B-Boys from Notts back
in the day, whose mixtapes and production go down equally
well in both New York and Hoodtown. They got all the style!
www.heavybronx.com
Inna Nuttin
Post-Outdaville supergroup set up by Big Trev, featuring
Shifty Spirit, Dougie Hauser, Elroy, Shenade, Ventrola,
L1 and Ritual.
www.myspace.com/shiftyspirit
Outdaville
Probably Nottingham’s most talked-about hiphop
group of the last twenty years. Their crew included
Lee Ramsay and Nick Stez (who later formed the Marga
Boys), the much-lauded Scorzayzee (who we hear is about
to make a comeback), Karizma (something of a favourite of
ours here at LeftLion), C-Mone (the voice of the girlfriend
on Mike Skinner’s A Grand Don’t Come For Free, also check
out her quality solo album The Butterfly
), Tempa (who appeared on TV with
Effect),
Fatman Scoop in the rap idol style show
), DJ Fever, Mizz Red, Fedel
Chancers),
Castro and former choirgirl Sophie
Johnson-Hill.
www.myspace.com/i_am_
The biggest UK hiphop
night in the country
which takes place right on
our doorstep. Founded by
1xtra host Mista Jam and Joe
Buhdha, it’s since spawned
a DVD, an album and the
Sureshot records label. Everyone from Kano to Roots Manuva
to Skinnyman has appeared at one of their nights.
www.uktakeover.net
Viking (as in Black Viking)
Courtney Rose (aka Black Viking), is the brother of
Big Trev and runs a community studio in Radford. He
has overseen the careers of Wariko, J Gold, Gully, Fort Notts,
Paris 1 and his son Willis, among many others.
www.myspace.com/mpc2500
Joe Buhdha
Joe signed his first label deal in the late eighties with
Submission records, when he had barely left school.
He went on to produce for Nottingham heads such as Mr
45 and Fury, before, more recently, setting up UK Takeover
with Mista Jam. He’s been working with the likes of Rodney
P, DJ Noize and Klashnekoff. His series of Freestyle Frenzy
EPs are pure fire!
www.myspace.com/mrjoebuhdha
Pete First Blood
Founder member of the local
hiphop troupe known as First
Blood. The crew boasts the likes of
Louis Cypher and Opticus Rhyme,
as well as a live band featuring
Danny Hughes (Team Hughes) and
Liam Bailey (The Soul Parade).
www.bloodcypherryme.co.uk
Kids in Tracksuits
Cheeky
young
production
scamps who have made serious
waves in the local and national scene,
with several Radio One appearances
under their belts. Their live sets now
feature Karizma and Emcee Killa. Check
them at the LeftLion NYE party.
www.kidsintracksuits.co.uk
k
Graffiti is an important part of the local scene, and
Notts is blessed with a variety of talented (legal)
writers. Those worth a mention include Dilk (who runs the
Coverage paint shop in the West End Arcade), Detonate’s
in-house designer Small Kid, Rikki Marr and Si Mitchell (both
regular LeftLion contributors), Oxygen Thievez, Popx and
the people who run nottsgraffiti.co.uk. There are loads more
than these however, past and present, but by nature it’s an
underground art.
www.nottsgraffiti.co.uk
Quality
beatboxers
Notts boasts several
of these at the moment
including the Petebox
(pictured), Foz, Lyrikool Lipz
and LippiCool (apparently
the UK’s youngest pro).
XS:IF
Nottingham’s hiphop
disciple who also
set up the long-running
Nottingham night Prescription.
Also a founder member of
the Cult nights and an early
contributor to LeftLion. His
new album is due to drop early next year.
www.thepetebox.com
Lost Island
The first recording
incarnation
of
Styly Cee alongside
lyricist Frisco Boogie.
Their early releases on
Son Records are now
collectors’ items and
part of the foundation
our scene is built upon.
Styly’s later incarnation as Pitman, a piss-taking miner/
rapper, created national interest a few years ago with two
albums featuring tunes like Witness The Pitness.
Writers
Record shops
www.myspace.com/xsif
Vinyl is the key tool for any
hiphop DJ. The trade has
obviously slowed down a little
recently, but Ohmygosh (run by local
scratch enthusiast DJ Squigley),
Selectadisc, Funky Monkey and
Rob’s Record Mart are still all regular
haunts for the crate-diggers.
www.ohmygosh.co.uk
Ya Get Me?
Nottingham saying brought to national attention in
the MOBO award nominated Mr 45 tune Radford: Ya
Get Me, which was later covered by Tempa.
www.sonrecords.com
MasterScratch
DJ from the Rock City Crew of breakdancers who
formed in 1983, at the venue’s auditions to find
the best B-Boys in Nottingham at the time. The Saturday
afternoon shows they put on were legendary! Masterscratch
went on to support Grandmaster Flash on tour and other
members joined New York’s Rock Steady Crew. The local
breakers mantle has since been passed to All Torque, who
later became known as Groundhogs.
www.myspace.com/groundhogs_uk
www.myspace.com/45theboss
Smokes and
Bluntz
St Anns-based rap and
grime crew who are massive
in numbers and well known
in their community. Featuring
Rapper Ru, Yung Marv, Smokes,
Bluntz, Glockz, 5th Element
(formerly of Minds of Mischief) and many others. They also
do a lot of work with Mr 45 (aka Ziggy Peng).
Zetia
Zetia are a young and talented production duo of TQ
and Dr Javelin, signed to the Dealmaker label. Also not
forgetting Zero Theory, who produced the classic Get Out
albums with Cappo.
www.myspace.com/zetiafamilia
www.myspace.com/smokesandbluntzsb98
This is not intended as any sort of a definitive history of Notts hiphop. We’re bound to
have missed people out of this list due to forgetfulness, lack of knowledge and page
constraints. Don’t hate on us for it! We’re always interested to hear new local talent.
So if you want to make us aware, link us up on [email protected]
13
A Songwriter’s Tale
words: Miles Hunt
illustration: Kim Thompson
I was somewhere between the ages of twelve and
thirteen when I made my first attempt at writing
a song. The whole thing hung around what could loosely be
described as three chords and as punk rock, the driving force
behind said venture, prescribed at the time, that was two more
than I needed.
The song was called Speakeasy, and I had borrowed my elder
Brother’s Les Paul copy electric guitar, without his permission, on
which to compose it. A guitar that I latterly snapped the neck off,
whilst pulling some shapes to a Mick Ronson solo from the Ziggy
Stardust album, in front of mom and dad’s full length mirror.
The first chord was definitely E minor, I had a book that told me so,
but the following two I made up myself and the basis of the song’s
structure was essentially The Only Ones’ Another Girl, Another
Planet. Only it was far thinner on melody than Peter Perrett’s effort
and the lyrics were, without any debate, rubbish. In fact, I can call
to mind, in horrific detail, the first three songs I ever wrote.
Accompanying Speakeasy in this overbearingly naive trilogy
was The Happy Fields of Thought. This was a wannabe wig-out
psychedelic adventure that I describe as such simply because
I had employed another of my brother’s possessions, a phaser
pedal, which essentially recreated the second verse of the Small
Faces’ Itchycoo Park no matter what you were trying to play. The
third song, easily the most loathsome of the three, was called
Writing Home. It was the tale of a soldier doing just what the
song’s title suggests. Nonsense.
By way of respect to my tender years, friends and relatives alike
complimented me on these early endeavours, when in fact I
should have been firmly dissuaded from attempting the noble
craft of songwriting ever again. I have to come clean; in my
formative years I showed absolutely no promise as a songwriter
whatsoever. So it was that, for the next ten years, I was to be
found plying my musical trade behind the drum kit.
Sometime around the spring of 1986 I heard that Malc Treece (the
man that would later become my song writing partner for the
next twenty-odd years) was putting together a new band and
was keen to locate a vocalist. At this time I was sharing a flat
with Clint Mansell (of Pop Will Eat Itself) near Stourbridge. Clint
had access to a cassette portastudio and on occasion would
let me borrow it. I had recorded a couple of tunes I’d written
on Clint’s acoustic guitar, vocals and all. So I felt reasonably
confident that I was ready to step from behind the drum kit in
order to present the recordings to Malc, by way of enquiring
after the job of vocalist and rhythm guitarist in his new combo.
To cut a long story short, Malc awarded me the desired position
and pretty soon I discovered that being the band’s frontman
wasn’t entirely about showing off around the mic stand. No sir,
the responsibility of writing the lyrics had also fallen my way
and I considered the duty somewhat daunting, almost to the
point of resenting the new role. I was left wondering whether
leaving the comparable sanctity of the drum stool had indeed
been a wise decision. But with repeated application, most often
occurring as I traveled between Stourbridge and Birmingham
on the number nine bus, I found that the sense of achievement
garnered from these early toils was such as I had never before
known. I had become, arguably by default, a songwriter… and
I liked it.
I liked it so much that during the following eight years I
managed to co-write and sing some seventeen Top 40 hits with
Malc’s band, The Wonder Stuff. In my opinion, those songs were
nowhere near the best that we wrote. Within the four albums
that we released between 1988 and 1993 there are songs that
I am far more proud of. It’s Yer Money I’m After, Baby may well
have pricked the ears of Radio One producers, but to this day I
am still utterly moved by the beauty of Sing The Absurd, to the
point of doubting that it was indeed me that wrote it!
By 1994, I needed what can only be described as ‘time out’.
Certainly the touring schedule had become tiring, as were the
expectations of the band’s creative output even the constant
company of my fellow band mates was beginning to leave me
unfulfilled; but in hindsight, I was quite simply ‘outta gas, baby’,
and that was a first. It’s not a pleasant feeling, wondering if that’s
it. However, I truly believe that anyone who has chosen to follow
their creative whims as a life pursuit has, at one time or another,
experienced the blank canvas that will no longer accept the brush.
To this day, each time I’m in need of a new set of lyrics, I tend
to work on the music first. I am usually convinced that the well
has run dry, or whatever it is that wells have done when they no
longer contain any water. Being over forty, as I can now proudly
announce, there are certain subjects that I tend to avoid. The
boy/girl, unrequited love motif now strikes me as an irrelevance.
The new breed of writers have it covered in abundance and I
suppose that’s as it always was and indeed should be. The idea
of a man my age attempting catch the eye of the prettiest girl at
the disco seems only to conjure up an image of utter creepiness.
14
Many times I have been asked where it is that I draw my lyrical
inspiration from and my oft’-repeated response is ‘from my
mind’. What I mean to say is that I write about the things that I
think about on a daily basis. Here’s an example of something I’m
toying with presently:
What is the accepted thinking on the subject of pissing in the
shower?
a) Only in one’s own shower.
b) Only in someone else’s shower, or
c) Never at all, no matter whose shower you happen to be
standing in.
I’m curious, that’s all. I accept that the song I end up writing
that considers the matter might not be up there with All You
Need Is Love when it comes to an everyman lyric, but it will be a
song from the heart. That is to say that I’ll really mean what I’m
singing about, as opposed to trying to pass off some nonsensical
fluff concerning my soul or spirit that simply carries the tune.
That’s really the crux of the matter.
I believe a singer should sing about what he, or she, truly spends
their time contemplating and better still, should absolutely tell it
like it is, as he, or she, sees it. My tutors have been, amongst others,
Bob Dylan, Johnny Rotten, Morrissey and Charles Bukowski and
I’ve tended to believe every word they’ve uttered simply because
they sounded like they believed what they were talking about; and
furthermore, like they needed to say it. When I hear people say ‘I
don’t really listen to lyrics,’ and I’ve heard that more times than I
care to recount, they may as well have just informed me that they
have set fire to the entire contents of my house. It pains me so.
Songwriting is a dignified pursuit and with it comes a great
responsibility, if only to one’s self. There are an infinite number
of subjects to cover and similarly an infinite number of ways
to express them. I don’t consider any of the songs I that have
written to have achieved greatness, but that is my goal and my
motivation.
Writing Home or writing this now, practice may not have made
perfect in my case, but I’ve had a hell of a good time trying.
Available at The Casual Tailor 14 Malin Hill The Lace Market Nottingham NG11JQ
In my humble
experience there are
two types of student.
The first is the shy retiring type who lives in
the library rather the nightclub and considers
Nietzsche, Foucault and Chomsky to be his best
friends. I fall into this category, although I do fall
out with Nietzsche quite often. The second is the
face about campus who can be found puking into
their best friend’s turn-ups or hogging the Oceana
dancefloor on a Tuesday night. Loay Hady fits
the latter category, or rather the characters from
his debut novel Fresher do. The book does exactly
what it says on the packet, recounting the glorious
highs and lows of that unforgettable first week
at university. LeftLion caught up with the author,
former editor of Nottingham Trent University’s
Platform magazine, to try and discover what that
dressing up malarkey is really all about...
In Fresher, you talk about the startling resemblance between
a mother and daughter at university ‘same green eyes, same
thin nose and they even had the same polite smile’. What
features and personality traits have you inherited from the
Hady family line?
Unfortunately for me not looks, but I guess I’m hardworking
like my mum. I would have loved to pick up other things such
as punctuality off dad, but sadly I seem to have picked up the
whole Egyptian time keeping mentality, which is around six
hours late… give or take a day.
The main character starts the book off trying to get over a
relationship. Did you have a similar experience?
I split up with a girl at the start of my own uni days, because we
were both moving away and I didn’t really want to try the whole
long distance thing. The first few months were so rammed, I
didn’t think about the break up much to be honest.
Do you think university is about education or escape?
I think a lot of people do it for both. Obviously students who
study in their home town and still live with their folks don’t feel
the need to get away. But personally living with other people
was definitely where I learned most.
In your opening chapter we encounter suicide, the law,
homelessness and a variety of other awkward situations. Is
this the average fresher week?
I hope not! But there’s a core of truth to everything in the book,
so it wouldn’t surprise me if someone somewhere had a Freshers’
with, say… half as much madness in it.
Every time the main character tries to help someone he gets
into trouble. Are you trying to temper readers’ altruistic
tendencies?
Haha, never! Long live socialism… everyone should help
everyone else whenever and however they can.
University life seems to immediately teach him tolerance.
Are such social skills as important as the actual qualifications
attained?
Completely, and one can go as far to say even more so. What you
learn about dealing with such a wide spread of people becomes
engrained in your character and you live with the value of that
for your whole life. As for the classroom education, if you end
up in a job unrelated to your course, that subject knowledge is
going to fade away pretty fast.
There’s an incident in the book where the main character goes
to hotwire a car only to realise he has no idea how to do it.
He just presumed he would be able to after seeing it done on
television. Is television really that powerful a medium?
Well, let me tell you a story. There was a girl I thought was cool,
so I asked her out and for the next few dates she was acting a
little strange; saying things that just didn’t seem like her. A few
dates later I managed to find out what had changed. She told me
on our dates, she was acting how she thought Carrie from Sex in
the City would act. Take from that what you will.
For your character, the poster sale was the most important
part of info in the Fresher pack. What posters were in your
residence?
Ones of sunsets, they are my favourite thing in the world. A
Bushisms poster that said ‘Welcome to Mrs Bush and my fellow
astronauts’…and of course Toy Story!
What info would you put in a Fresher pack?
Mega money-off vouchers, info about city haunts that are off
the beaten track and most importantly, a list of all the health,
financial and mental help a student could ever need. Everyone
needs one of them at some point.
16
words:
James K Walker
The character mistakes a toothbrush for a vibrator in the
book. Was this a Freudian slip or is sex always on a man’s
brain?
Originally I toyed with the idea of him putting something of
hers on in the dark because he was cold… and that being the
embarrassing part. But I just couldn’t make it stick comfortably.
Him thinking of the toothbrush as a sex toy was more about
how tired he was and his imagination was running away
with him. Though the short answer to the second part of your
question is probably ‘yes’.
He befriends a pregnant woman. Is this common at university
or are students more responsible?
Definitely more responsible. A lot of people are wiser to
contraception and post-sex options than they were in school
or college, so even though there is more sex, there’s less
pregnancies.
Why do students like dressing up?
Its fun I guess and maybe there’s a typical fantasy undercurrent
in a lot of it.
So what’s your fantasy?
For me to wear, it would be school uniform, because without
fail people plaster messages all over your shirt. To view, it’s a
superhero costume, as some people pull out all the stops and use
the most random stuff to make the most bizarre outfits. Hilarious!
How did you meet the publishers Stone Soup and what are
they like to work with?
By pimping myself! Obviously I sent out dozens and dozens of
manuscripts and they said they would go ahead with it. They
were really easy to work with for Fresher, just streamlining me
where I went into the character’s head a bit. For my second
novel President it’s a lot tougher, as there’s a lot of sensitive stuff
in there that has to be dealt with in a lot more detail, especially
in terms of audience. But we’re working on it and they’re really
supporting the idea of what I’m trying to do with it, so… I can’t
ask for more than that really.
After graduating and being published in Nottingham, have
you got used to being called ‘duck’ yet?
Definitely! I haven’t started saying it yet, but I picked up saying
‘ay’ off loads of kiwis while I was travelling, so all I have to add
is ‘up me duck’ and I’ll be set.
Fresher by Loay Hady is out now from
Stone Soup Publishing priced at £5.99.
www.jameskwalker.co.uk/
www.lhady.com
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PUBLIC EXHIBITION : SYMPOSIUM : EVENTS
AN INVESTIGATION BY THE NEW ART EXCHANGE AND THE CENTRE FOR CONTEMPORARY ART NOTTINGHAM
LACE & SLAVERY
IN NOTTINGHAM
11 January - 10 February
www.laceslavery.org.uk
PUBLIC EXHIBITION
SYMPOSIUM
EVENTS
ONCE UPON A TIME IN
THE WEST
THERE WAS LACE
REBELLION,
GENDER & BRITAIN
THE LEGACY OF SLAVERY
IN CONTEMPORARY ART
Reflections on the Hiﬆory of Slavery
A Series of Talks at Broadway Media Centre
(see website for further details)
Godfried Donkor
The Yard Gallery, Wollaton Hall,
Nottingham
11 January - 10  February
Keynote speaker: Kobena Mercer
with Professor Dick Geary,
Inﬆitute for the Study of Slavery, University of Nottingham
Dr Alan Rice, University of Central Lancashire
and Frank Abbott, Nottingham Trent University
Broadway Media Centre, 11 January
UNLACED
at the D Bar, 191 Alfreton Rd,
Nottingham
with David 'Stickman' Higgins,
Audrey O'Connor and Lisa Jackson
Friday 11 th January, 9pm til late
Centre for
Contemporary
Art Nottingham
Exhibition and residency curated by Michael Forbes, New Art Exchange.
Public programme and publication curated by Alex Farquharson,
Centre for Contemporary Art Nottingham.
words: Jared Wilson
The tale of Nottingham’s Robin Hood
spans from thirteenth century literature
references of ‘Robehod’ or ‘Hobbehod’ to
the modern day hero we see on screen.
The latest TV incarnation of the legend
is prime-time viewing on BBC1 at 7pm
on a Saturday. The chief writer behind the
series is Dominic Minghella, creator of ITV
comedy series Doc Martin (starring Martin
Clunes) and brother to Anthony Minghella
(director of films such as The Talented Mr
Ripley and The English Patient). We put
some questions to Dominic about stolen
tapes, Nottingham accents and having a
son who is a child genius…
How did you first get involved with the Robin Hood project?
The production company Tiger Aspect hired me. They were
interested to see whether we could come up with a Robin Hood
series they could sell to the BBC. I knew I would love to do it, but at
first I didn’t know how to reinvent something so firmly established.
Did you start by watching all the old portrayals of Robin Hood?
Yeah we did, we watched everything. We made an office into a
shrine to Robin Hood and tried to absorb as much of the existing
canon as we could. We got old halfpenny copies of Robin Hood
magazines from ebay and everything else we could find.
Apart from yours, can you pick out a favourite Robin Hood?
I liked Robin of Sherwood, because I thought it seemed to be of
its time. It was mystical and reflects politically what was going
on in the eighties. That time was about Thatcher and a hardnosed materialism, against which that spiritualism was entirely
appropriate. I loved the Kevin Costner film too. I thought it was
an epic story and we wanted to get some of that in, even though
ours was on a much more modest budget. I think that to a
certain extent we’ve got the epic story of Kevin Costner and put
a bit of the cheeky wit of Errol Flynn in as well.
We heard a rumour early on that Robbie Williams was going to
be cast as Robin. Was that ever considered?
It was an internet rumour. To be fair though we did have completely
open minds starting out, but by the end you could see it was
always going to be somebody like Jonas. Apart from anything else,
we wanted to make a show that could last five years and you can’t
get a pop star to commit for that length of time.
There was also a rumour that Little Britain’s Matt Lucas might
turn up as Friar Tuck…
I think that idea came up in conversation between the controller
of BBC One Peter Fincham and Matt Lucas. I think they thought
it would be a great idea at the time, but nothing else came of it.
It is part and parcel of doing such a high profile show I suppose.
Where did you find Jonas Armstrong (pictured right)
to play Robin?
We took a policy decision to hire a new cast because we didn’t
want viewers to recognise actors when they saw the gang.
Jonas is actually quite an experienced actor for his age and has
a good relationship with Tiger Aspect, as he had been in their
series Teachers. He was still young enough to have the potential
for the cheek and light heartedness of the Flynn element, but old
enough to have been to war and learned from it.
Keith Allen is brilliant as the Sheriff…
He is great fun to write for. He’s playing an out and out bad boy
and was born to do it. He also loves being the senior member of
the cast and he takes everybody out and has a good time. I just
think he’s mesmerising on screen and I can’t imagine anybody
else in that role.
Certain aspects of the show, particularly the dialogue and the
costume, seem very modern. Was that a conscious decision?
Yes, that was deliberate. The BBC does period costume drama
particularly well, but it doesn’t speak to a young audience. We
wanted to deliver a show that was for the family, so we decided
to go as modern as we could get without it becoming ridiculous.
That meant walking a difficult line and is quite a complicated
brief to give to your crew. Sometimes I think maybe they went
further than we wanted… but overall this was the right decision.
I met someone last night who nearly crashed on the M4 back
to London because her boys had to get in for 7pm to watch the
show and that’s how we wanted people to feel about it.
Would you consider giving one of the characters a modern day
Nottingham accent?
Yes, we would. But you can tell we didn’t become too embroiled
with trying to deliver a particular accent or other, partly because
we wanted to cast the best young actors available to us wherever
they were from. If somebody is faking their accent they will be
found out. We just told the cast to speak however they were
comfortable with. We don’t want to hear phoney accents as it
can be insulting and people have an incredibly fine ear for their
local voice. The truth is if we found an actor from Nottingham who
could do it authentically then we would be delighted. There will
be a regeneration of the cast as the show goes on, some of them
move on and some get killed in the show. So you never know…
Have you heard about the new Russell Crowe film Nottingham?
Yes I have. As far as I know the idea was to make the Sheriff the
good guy and I thought it was a great idea. I would’ve loved to
do that if I was doing a film. But for a series you’ve got to keep
coming back and our Robin Hood in many ways does what is
says on the tin. The only thing I thought was a bit odd was
casting Russell Crowe as a good guy. I would much rather have
him as a baddie.
On your Wikipedia entry, it says your son Dante is a child
genius. Is this true?
He was in a documentary called Child Genius and he is very
clever with a very high IQ. It can be quite hard work; it is
definitely a curse as much as it is as a blessing. I think what you
want is your loved ones to be of average brightness and happy.
He is thirteen and comes up with good stories for the show, but
is absolutely appalled by my historical inaccuracies.
Would you ever consider working with your brother Anthony
on a project?
Yes, I would but it is unlikely to happen because he writes and
directs his own scripts so there no real absence in his skill set
that I can fill. Sometimes we find ourselves talking about a
project, but I am not holding my breath.
Some of the tapes got stolen while you were shooting the first
series in Budapest? Did that affect the final product much?
Not that I can pinpoint in any specific way, but it did adversely
affect the middle to late episodes as we were caught in a state
of incredible crisis for weeks. Of course that affected morale and
we didn’t tell our cast and crew for a long time because we knew
it would affect them. But at times we were very demoralised and
anxious, staying up through the night trying to think of different
ways of getting our material back. They took everything. At one
point there was a story on the internet saying that they had
stolen four tapes, but they had actually stolen 400 tapes and that
was the entire show. We did eventually get them back as the
police caught them, but it was all very late in the day.
Is there anything else you’d like to say to LeftLion readers?
Thank you very much. I am so delighted that the legend of Robin
exists and it has been really good fun reinventing it. We are
sensitive to the fact that it belongs to the people of Nottingham,
but I think that if you want to make a story as good as it can be,
you have to change things to do it justice. I do hope this version
of Robin stands the test of time. We will just have to see…
See more about the series on www.bbc.co.uk/robinhood
The Robin Hood Up Close exhibition,
featuring props and costumes from the show,
runs at Nottingham Castle until Spring 2008.
19
TH
E
O
Do You Want Deccing?
N
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AN
D
ON
LY
X
YL
O
PH
ONE M
AN
Presenting the LeftLion Christmas Tree decorations...
words: Al Needham decorations: Rikki Marr
Want to celebrate the birth of Jesus in a Hoodtown style? Then leave all that
baubley crap in the loft, give the 20inch inflatable Santa a miss and Notts up
your tree like one-o. From tender scenes of the nativity (if it had been situated
in Bulwell market) to the most Nottingham way of saying ‘Happy Birthday
Jesus’, without making the outside of your house look like a big neon turd.
wrapping paper on the backs and trim them.
U
YO
S,
MA
H
FO
R THAT
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O
N
UTSIDE YA
TE
S
AN
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TIN
US
M
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SP L E
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A
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V
OF
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OH CO
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AL
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IN
G
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CLIMBS THE
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crap telly, balancing a tin of Quality Street on your distended gut, wondering how the
bleddy hell you’re going to manage without getting paid for another five weeks.
PISSHEAD WH
O
THAT
YO
UR
LOV
ED
ND JOZZ
A
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6. Hang them off your tree and stare wistfully while you doss on the sofa, watching
T
FR
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school, I had to post one to myself because no-one would send me one. Miss cried
when she saw it.
E
O
M
MA
5. I never got any cards at school. The day before we broke up in the third year at junior
N TH
F A R SE
O
when you were making Christmas cards for your mates that you put in that homemade postbox in the assembly hall. Red’s nice.
I
R EE
SE
4. Feel free to dab a bit o’ that glitter on them if you want, like you did at primary school
TED GIFTS
K
IN
ST
loopy bit at the top. Nick that one at the back of the stationery cupboard at work.
Also whip some of them sticky-back hole-protectors an’all, because no-one uses them
anymore anyway.
LE
C
3. Use one o’ them hole-puncher things, so you can get your bit of string through the
TO IMPRE
ULLY
TF
2. Cut out the remaining decorations, glue them to a piece of cardboard, stick some
H
G
holder and bung it on the top of your tree.
E
AR
TH
OU
X
RY
MER
1. Cut the Xylophone Man angel out, affix it to a piece of card, glue it to a toilet roll
TY
EN
INSTRUCTIONS...
MERR
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PL
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THE SQUARE ON NE
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if you would like to feature
on these pages,
email details about your work
(with examples if possible)
to [email protected]
Describe what you do
in one word. Womble.
Best creative tool?
My beloved angle-grinder
with the Arbortech
chainsaw attachment.
Hardest thing
about doing art?
Knowing when something
is finished.
What would you
vacuum pack?
The Bush administration.
What artists would you like
to exhibit with?
Jean Tinguely, Bill Woodrow,
Fischli and Weiss, and Heath Robinson.
Where in Nottingham would you convert into an art space?All the
vacant shops, supermarkets and unnecessary city centre loft apartments.
Best way to start the day? Preferably sometime in the afternoon.
Best way to end the day? Alive
Worst job? Toilet attendant at Donington Park
for the Monsters of Rockfestival.
Are you an insider or outsider?A bit of both. In order to harness
the cynicism constructively.
What do you think about CCAN (Centre for Contemporary Art Nottingham)?
It is long overdue. It will attract a lot of interest in the Nottingham art
scene, whilst offering exhibition opportunities to local, national and
international artists. I am glad to see more and more creative graduates
staying after they finish their studies and CCAN will really help with that.
What do you think about the Arts Council?
They rock! They do a great job of supporting the creative industries and
promoting the local talent.
Favourite sense?
Smell. You can’t beat the smell of a roast cooking to get the appetite going.
Or any food cooking for that matter.
Tell us your artistic concept in one line. My work is concerned with
subtly lobbying others to face up to our mutual responsibilities regarding
climate change, feckless consumerism and the neo-imperial rape of our
natural resources. Essentially, I am the fairy godfather of junk.
Best thing about the art community? The plethora of knowledge and
experience you can draw on.
Where can we check out your stuff?
On YouTube. See Joe’s Womble-istic Gravity Defying Ball Bearing Run.
Describe what you do in one word.
Superdoodle.
Best creative tool?
The pencil. I wouldn’t get very
far without one of those.
Hardest thing about doing art?
Working like a mule in a
non-creative job, the hardest thing
is finding the time. Some days
I’m reduced to intense creative
outbursts spanning ten-minute
cigarette breaks.
What would you vacuum pack?
Five portions of fruit and veg, six
grams of salt and a carbon footprint.
What artists would you like to
exhibit with? Bernie Wrightson, ‘Ghastly’ Graham Ingels
and John Pound. All three are legends.
Where in Nottingham would you convert into an art space?
The Lawrence Automotive canteen.
Best way to start the day? With Rush rocking the stereo
and two litres of Marksman.
Best way to end the day? Knowing you wouldn’t have
done anything differently.
Worst job? I once did one that wouldn’t flush. It just wouldn’t go away.
Three flushes and the bastard was still afloat. I said to myself,
‘Christ Almighty, I don’t remember eating that many fairy cakes.’
Are you an insider or outsider? I’m an outsider. But I’m tapping
at the window. I’m like Danny Glick in Salem’s Lot.
What do you think about CCAN
(the new Centre for Contemporary Art Notts)? Fingers crossed.
What do you think about the Arts Council? Funding’s really not
my bag. Everything I need I can quite easily steal from partners.
Favourite sense? Common sense.
Tell me your artistic concept in one line.
Leave a sign. You girls know what I mean… something witchy.
Best thing about the art community?
On the whole, members of the art community do what they do for
the pure love of it, not for money nor recognition, although those things
may come to follow. Primarily they do it because they love to
- that’s a very endearing quality to have.
www.myspace.com/dantoporowski
www.kojellyindustries.co.uk
page design www.alisonhedley.co.uk
Describe what you do in one word.
Mythopoeia.
Best creative tool?
Whether I’m making a site-specific
installation, a video piece, physical theatre,
a live interactive experiment, a painting or
a sculpture, they all rely on aspects
of storytelling.
Hardest thing about doing art?
Censorship and respect for forward thinkers,
who actually want to make a difference.
What would you vacuum pack?
Anyone featured in Heat magazine;
then I’d attach it to a rocket.
What artists have you worked with?
This summer I went on an epic adventure
to Texas, Arizona and Mexico. I was
¨
working with Guillermo Gómez Pena
and his performance group La Pocha Nostra,
as well as learning from Native American
Indian Shamen healers, border crossing
activists, reformed gang leaders, politicised
sex workers and the guy who began the
clown army.
Best way to start the day? Mischief.
Best way to end the day? Invisibly levitating on a Möbius strip outside
city hall, watching as people interweave each other morphing into
a Cronenberg/Lynch/Burroughs funfair.
Worst job? I once worked for the devil… she stole my shoes, the bitch!
Are you an insider or outsider?It depends which alter ego you ask.
I hope they support local and emerging artists and help make live art
and performance as strong as it used to be in Nottingham.
Favourite sense?
The extra one, which I have to keep a secret…
Tell us your artistic concept in one line.
Exploring modes of audience participation, an artist’s responsibility
and aspects of evolving traditions.
What do you think about the art community?
The most rewarding thing I’ve done is being involved with outreach projects
and teaching, using my skills to enrich others’ lives. Art is a powerful, often
underappreciated, tool. Why do you think it’s used as a therapy?
Describe what you do in
one word. Art.
Best creative tool?
Gaffer tape.
Hardest thing about doing
art? Persuading others
to help me do it.
What would you vacuum
pack? All the spiders
in the world.
What artists would you
like to exhibit with?
Peter Fuss, Hannah Phillips
and Apexa Patel.
Where in Nottingham would you convert into an art space?
The grassy patch and cliffs by the Victoria Centre car park.
Best way to start the day? With a glass of fine wine.
Best way to end the day? With a glass of fine wine.
Worst job? For Greggs
Are you an insider or outsider?
I fluctuate between the two.
It’s great for the region. I think if more international and big name artists
are coming here, it can only be good for the local art scene. But for CCAN
to arrive it seems some other Nottingham galleries have had to close,
or have lost funding, and that isn’t ideal.
What do you think about the Arts Council?
I don’t think artists should rely on one body to fund them,
but without the Arts Council most artists wouldn’t be able to survive
or even create work. I helped organise the Tether Festival in Nottingham
in November. We have applied for funding, which if successful will make
all the difference.
Favourite sense?Smell.
Tell me your artistic concept in one line.
The gap between insanity and genius, which I suspect does not exist.
Best thing about the art community?
It’s relaxed but ambitious.
www.Z058.com
www.burlesquetwistypants.com
www.leftlion.co.uk/issue20 27
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Penny Black
(Tommy, Guitar and Vocals)
Who is in the band?
Tommy, Dean, Ben,
Emily and Matt.
How long have
you been playing
together?
It all started in the
winter of 2004.
Describe your act in
five words…
Bluesy, jazzy, poppy,
fun music.
Who are your
musical influences?
Everything from
Robert Johnson to
Wham!
If you could play a gig anywhere, where would you choose and why?
Somewhere slippery because we like slippery.
If you could get any musician in to play with you who would it be?
I think I answer for everyone when I say Craig David.
What’s the best gig you have been to?
The Apples at the Maze recently was brilliant, or maybe Blur a long time ago. I
would say Radiohead but the speed I bought turned out to be ketamine so it was a
little odd.
What’s the best thing about the Notts music scene?
The diversity and wealth of musical talent that walks our city streets.
What’s the worst thing?
There’s not enough A&R, a lack of baroque music and too few cornets.... too many
wasps and spiders.
What was the last album you bought?
Portishead’s second album, it makes me cry, or was it SixNationState? Hmmm, buy
them both.
The last book you read?
The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran and We’re Going On A Bear Hunt by Michael Rosen.
Anything you want to plug?
Our friends, our family, our pets and our virility. Also my housemate’s escort service,
get in contact for bookings.
myspace.com/pennyblackband
Yunioshi
Rob (Guitar and Vocals)
Who’s in the band?
Rob Yunioshi, Anna
Yunioshi Suzuki, James
Yunioshi San and
Spaceman Hakushi
Yunioshi.
How long have you
been playing together?
We’ve only very recently
become a four-piece.
Anna, Jim and I have
been together now for
a year. Our drummer
Hakushi has been with
us for about three hours.
Describe your act in
five words.
Robotic bears toying
with breakbeats.
Who are your musical
influences?
I’m a big fan of Frenchfried-pop of the sixties
and breakbeats so I
guess Eddie Bo and Serge Gainsbourg would be high up there. They’d be joined by
Beck, Fonda 500 and the Super Furries.
If you could play a gig anywhere, where would you choose?
I’d love to do some festivals next year. We’re planning to hit Sweden and Iceland in the
New Year. Japan would be excellent too as we seem to have developed a following out
there!
If you could get anyone in to play with you who would it be?
I’d love to get Johnny-Five, the robot from Short Circuit, in as a dancer.
What’s the best thing about the Notts music scene?
It’s full of enthusiastic promoters who genuinely enjoy putting on exciting shows and
getting people along to gigs. The atmosphere that creates is great to be part of.
The fact that it’s widely unknown, when it deserves to be up there with the best.
Its either Senor Coconut’s A Tribute to Kraftwerk or Fur and Gold by Bat for Lashes.
Not in Nottingham and Supernight’s Christmas covers party at The Maze on 15
December. We’ll be playing our rendition of Christmas in Hollis by Run DMC. Our new
release EPTWO will be released in January. Six belting tracks with guest vocals from
ex Do Me Bad Things vocalist The Woods on one track!
myspace.com/yunioshi
Penny Black
and
Rebel Soul Collective
play the first LeftLion
Presents of 2008 at the
Orange Tree on Saturday
12 January. Music from
8.30pm. Free entry.
Kids in Tracksuits and Yunioshi
play the LeftLion New Years Eve
Extravaganza at the Orange Tree on
Monday 31 December 2007. Accompanying
them will be the Stiff Kittens, Karizma,
Emcee Killa and more guests to be
confirmed. Tickets cost 10 pounds and
are available from leftlion.co.uk/tickets.
More details on page 28.
Rebel Soul Collective
Who is in the band?
Matt Culpin (lead vocals), Anthony Hagan
(keyboards and vocals), Will Clarke (rhythm
guitar and vocals), Jim Woodward (bass
guitar and accordion), Hayley Clarke (vocals
and cornet), Chris Dawson (saxophone), Pete
Gummerson (drums).
Describe your act in five words…
Fun, energetic, melodic, foot-tapping and
fresh.
Who are your musical influences?
The Specials, Desmond Dekker, The Beach
Boys, The Clash, The Kinks, The Beatles,
The Rumble Strips, Bob Marley, The
Libertines, Doves, Larrikin Love and Yes (to
name a few!)
If you could play a gig anywhere, where
would you choose?
Jim: Sandbanks Beach in Poole. It’s a wonderful
place.
Matt: Copacabana beach a la the Stones!
If you could get any musician in to play with you
who would it be?
Hayley: Dizzy Gillespie or Prince.
Jim: Louis Armstrong.
Matt: Elvis and Joe Strummer.
What’s the best gig you have ever been to?
Hayley: Runrig at York Barbican few years ago.
Electric bagpipes on stage… enough said.
Matt: The Libertines at Kentish Town Forum in
December 2003.
Jim: Coldplay at V Festival 2003.
What’s the best thing about the Notts music
scene?
Jim: It’s not a rip-off getting in places, cool venues,
people aren’t afraid to be different and there’s a lot
of diversity.
Matt: Not many bands seem to get any recognition.
It’s almost in a hub and isn’t as well recognised as
it should be for the amount of young people that are
into all sorts of music genres.
Matt: Well, apart from our Leftlion gig with Penny
Black at the Orange Tree, we’re currently recording
our second demo. You can also get a free CD with a
selection of our tracks at each of our upcoming gigs.
rebelsoulcollective.co.uk
myspace.com/rebelrebelrebel
Kids In Tracksuits
How long have you been playing together?
Andy: Erm… a while. Four years now maybe?
Matt: Yeah, something like that. We’ve been
releasing music and playing loads of gigs since the
start of 2006 though.
Describe your act in five words…
Andy: Big, fat, sweaty, hip, hop.
Matt: Purple, red, black, yellow, orange.
Who are your musical influences?
Andy: Wu-Tang, Cut Chemist, Edan, A Tribe Called
Quest, Fingathing, Vex’d, Kid Koala,DJ Z-Trip, DJ
Kentaro....to name a few.
Matt: Boards of Canada, Aphex Twin, Madlib, Luke
Vibert, Dilla, Keaver and Brause, Autechre, Duckular,
Letherette, Hudson Mohawke, Flying Lotus, Lukid
and loads more.
If you could play a gig anywhere, where would
you choose and why?
Andy: New York! Because I want a free ticket to New
York...
Matt: New York, LA, Tokyo… any of those three
really.
If you could get any musician (alive or dead) in to
play with you who would it be?
Andy: Ol’ Dirty Bastard or the Beastie Boys I’d say.
Matt: Yeah, ODB would be perfect!
What’s the best gig you have ever been to?
Andy: DJ Shadow at Rock City, several years ago
when he was good.
Matt: Radiohead at South Park in Oxford or Aphex
Twin at Reading Festival in 2002.
What’s the best thing about the Notts music
scene?
Andy: The fact that the majority of it is hiphop
Matt: We don’t have to travel far to check any of it
out.
Andy: Haha! The fact that the majority of it’s hiphop
Matt: Too many indie bands for my liking…
Matt: Shape of Broad Minds’ Craft of the Lost Art.
The last book you read?
Andy: No idea. Whatever the last book I read at
school was. I’m not really into books.
Matt: Happyslapped by a Jellyfish by Karl Pilkington.
Andy: The LeftLion New Year’s Eve knees-up, of
course!
Matt: Yeah, that and my solo stuff on
www.myspace.com/lonemusic.
kidsintracksuits.co.uk
myspace.com/kidsintracksuits2
Andy: Percee P’s Perseverance.
25
OUT&ABOUT
LeftLion legs it out of the house with an
umbrella just in case and looks at a load of
things going on in Hoodtown that you can
get involved with. Our people on the street
this time are Al Needham and Camillo.
Once Upon A Time In The West There Was Lace
Nowadays, the main function of lace is to
provide something for your Nana to rest a
teapot upon. Yet not so long ago, it was a
luxury item of huge importance, and the
very foundation of Nottingham’s status
as one of the Empire’s major cities. But
there’s an untold story of Nottingham’s
relationship with lace, and it’s about to get
an airing at the Yard Gallery at Wollaton
Hall. It’s a distinctly uncomfortable yet
crucial tale.
The Market Bar
The Market Bar has been one of Hockley’s mainstays
for a while now; as a matter of fact, it’s just turned
sixteen years of age. It’s not interested in resting on its
laurels, however; it’s teamed up a new manager who
previously ran the hallowed Electricity Showrooms in
Hoxton Square with the one and only James Baillie, the
man who started The Bomb and Venus. To say we’re a
bit excited about the prospect is an understatement.
The revamped MB is on a mission to bring back the glory
days of both aforementioned venues. If you’re looking for
another place to pose at the bar in your show-off haircut
and second-hand kiddie jacket, this place isn’t for you.
We’re talking serious leftfield here. Think cosmic disco,
electro and deep house, with roots stretching right back
to the early days of dance music.
Highlights so far announced include monthly
residencies from Electro-Funk pioneer Greg Wilson,
DIY/Smokescreen and Heavenly Jukebox (the former
Heavenly Social, one of the finest nights London ever
gave a person). Dive, the regular student night on
Thursdays, is going to be a godsend to any NUS holder
who feels there’s more to life than waving their shirt
about to the Baywatch theme tune at Oceana. The oneoff events are equally mouth-watering; The Garden
Festival in association with Oh My Gosh records brings
No Fakin DJs into town on Friday 7 December. Then
Credit to the Edit and Basement Boogaloo team up for a
Xmas party on Saturday 15 December with Crazy P.
With so many clubs and promoters playing it safe
these days, it’s refreshing to see more venues taking
it back to basics whilst aiming for something niche.
The Market Bar has an intimate 330 capacity basement
with an impressive Funktion-One soundsystem. More
importantly, it should also have your arse on the
dancefloor as soon as possible.
The Market Bar, 16-22 Goose Gate, NG1 1FF
Tel: 0115 959 9785
www.themarketbar.co.uk
Curated by Michael Forbes, Once Upon A
Time In The West There Was Lace is part
of the New Art Exchange and Centre for
Contemporary Art, Nottingham’s Lace and
Slavery season, and has been put together
by Ghanaian artist and historian Godfried
Donkor. Aptly weaving together disparate
threads into a cohesive whole, Donkor links
Nottingham (who made the lace), the Deep
South (who provided the cotton to make the
lace) and West Africa (who provided the
slaves who picked the cotton). The subject
has been painstakingly uncovered by the
artist, who has spent time in Nottingham
researching as many of the local factories
and production methods as possible.
Ironically enough, Donkor demonstrates
that the high status of lace prevails in the
areas where slaves originated, with images
from Ghana and Nigeria.
Whilst cities like London and Liverpool
have gone to great lengths to bring their
own dealings with the slave trade to
account, Nottingham has perhaps been a
little reticent. Events such as this, which
prize cool reflection over chest-beating
histrionics, will go a long way towards
addressing uncomfortable truths. It also
ensures that Centre for Contemporary
Art, Nottingham’s mission to connect the
local with the international and act as an
important cultural and social resource, has
got off to a flier.
Exhibition runs from 11 January-10 February 2008, 11am-4pm daily.
The Yard Gallery, Courtyard Stables,
Wollaton Hall. Tel: 0115 915 3920
http://www.ccan.org.uk/
Richer Sounds
Spoddy fact: the original branch of Richer Sounds, which has been secreted
by the murky depths of the Thames in London Bridge since 1976, is in the
Guinness Book of Records for the highest annual shop sales per unit area, with
£195,426 worth of stock sold per square metre.
Our local branch on Mansfield Road is one of those rare chain shops that feels
and acts like an independent. It’s been operating in town since ’91, and is geared
towards the punter who knows what they want (even if they don’t exactly know
what it’s called), and isn’t going to settle for the off-the-shelf solution bandied
about by your more soulless ear-candy emporium. The staff are knowledgeable
yet unpatronising, and you get the feeling that they’re more interested in building
a relationship with customers than fobbing ‘em off with stuff they don’t need and
never seeing them again. That used to be known as customer service, ladies and
gentlemen, and it’d be nice to see more shops behaving that way.
Although Hi-Fi separates have been Richer Sounds’ speciality for over 30 years,
they’re also developing a solid rep in the field of home cinema, with a wide
range of flat-screen tellies and multi-room entertainment systems, and they’re
about to branch out with a full design and installation service.
They’re also one of the few companies who strive to keep their store prices as
low as their internet deals – seems they really like meeting people face-to-face,
bless ‘em. Their price-beat guarantee means they’ll give you money back on the
price of any equipment you see sold cheaper elsewhere, so there are serious
bargains to be had, helping you to stay a little richer, which is, erm, sound.
Richer Sounds, 108 Mansfield Road, NG1 3HD.
Tel: 0115 924 1551
www.richersounds.com
Confetti Institute Of Creative Technologies
Ignore the obvious wedding connotations; Confetti ICT is a wellrespected, custom-designed media facility geared towards giving
creatively-minded local sorts the leg-up they need in a range of
disciplines; from film and television to recording, DJing and sound
production. Simply put, if your decks leave you vexed and you’re
less than rapid on the Avid, this place can sort you out.
Confetti ICT has been operating out of Convent Street for 13 years
now, and have forged links with both local education (Castle College
and De Montfort University) and the international creative industry.
Beyonce’s producers nipped in to have a chat with students when
she visited the Arena, the legendary Tony Wilson spent his last visit
to Notts giving a talk at their Industry Week conference, and former
students are catching breaks left and right in all disciplines.
26
The ethos of Confetti ICT is simple; to hook up trained, experienced
staff with local talent, and give them the education and access to
equipment that they never had. They specialise in all creative fields,
and are rammed to the gills with kit. They’re an authorised training
centre for Apple, Digidesign and Steinberg, and also offer part-time
courses in Logic, Final Cut, Pro Tools, Cubase, DJ Essentials and
many more. Prices start from as little as £79, with the emphasis on
a relaxed, flexible approach to learning. They have full time courses
starting in January, April and September; give ‘em a buzz to get
your future in the creative industries on track.
Confetti ICT, 6-10 Convent Street, Nottingham. NG1 3LL.
Tel: 0115 993 2362
www.confetti-ict.com
When I ca
pture my
home video
Windows
into
Movie Mak
er, the sou
out of time
nd is
with the vi
d
eo. Am I d
something
oing
wrong?
This is a
common p
roblem w
recording to
hen
external dri
ves via a sl
connection
, for examp
ow
le
USB 1 or U
when reco
SB 2
rding high
resolution
If you are
video.
using exte
rnal drives,
using Firew
tr y
ire, or simp
ly record d
to your inte
irect
rnals and
then back
your extern
up
als later. Fa
iling all that to
nudge your
, just
audio file al
ong the tim
in your edit
e line
ing packag
e by a coup
notches un
le
til it synchr
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n you expor
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your project
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settings ar
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same
e you’re ca
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I’ve been doing
quite a bit of vo
cal recording in
but can never se
my home studio,
em to get the vo
cals sounding lik
of the song. It so
e they are part
unds like bad Ka
raoke! Any sugg
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One of the mo
st important as
pects of vocal
compression. Th
production is
e human voice
is one of the mo
instruments and
st dynamic of all
without having
so
me form of cont
wildly varying vo
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lume fluctuation
s, you are fighting
Effectively, comp
a losing battle.
ression irons ou
t the differences
by turning down
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the loudest peak
s. If the volume
vocals aren’t go
levels of your
ing up and down
all the time, it be
easier job to posit
comes a much
ion your vocals co
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alternative. If yo
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nsider the
sion, firstly it be
to get a decent
comes very hard
recording level,
because as soon
belts out a screa
as the vocalist
mer you go into
overload and dis
A compressor wo
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uld act like a ha
ndy friend on yo
it down as soon
ur fader, turning
as it detects a ve
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going to find it ne
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arly impossible
to set a level wh
all the vocals wi
ere you can hear
thout it ever soun
ding too loud. Yo
have a hardware
u don’t have to
compressor and
there are numerou
bundled with rec
s compressors
ording software
you are probably
already using!
Sorr y, I Don’t Sp
eak Geek is brou
ght to you
in association w
ith The Stone So
up
Project.
www.thestones
oupproject.com
LeftLion welcom
es Colin The Gee
k
as a brand new
columnist to ou
r
magazine. If yo
u have question
s
about technolo
gy, audio, vide
o,
photography, co
mputers or indee
d
anything else,
let him know b
y
emailing geek@
leftlion.co.uk.
A selection of yo
ur questions wil
l
be printed in this
magazine.
I have £2
00 to spe
nd
Do you h
ave any re on a DV camera fo
r Christm
commend
as.
ations?
For £200
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not all of
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best price
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to receive a copy of
the new A–Z guide
to part-time
courses 2007–08
(winter edition)
call
0115 9 100 100
or visit
www.ncn.ac.uk
27
listings...
EXPECTATIONS OF WINTER
Looking forward to: revisiting Copenhagen, pumpkin
soup, mulled wine, outdoor ice skating and the
German Market in the Market Square, Rocket Xmas
Playhouse Party: always great and always messy!
Not looking forward to: Xmas shopping.
Sara
New Year’s Heave
words: Kristi Genovese
Forget staying in and watching the hands of Big Ben on TV this New Year’s Eve.
This is the one night of the year when everybody should be out partying!
Looking forward to: Christmas being over and being
21 at last. Not looking forward to: it being really cold
before I get a new coat, maybe having to go away
for Christmas and if not being on my own.
Deceased
I am looking forward to: bringing back Opus, time
off so I can have Christmas drinks without the
dreaded work hangover, feeling snuggly in my scarf
and gloves. I am not looking forward to: it getting
colder (I like it when it’s here, but not the journey),
Christmas day, freezing me tits off when I go for a
smoke at work.
sopus
I’m looking forward to stockings, black ones with
suspenders. And Glögg, it is the most amazing drink
of loveliness in the world. The umlaut makes saying
it so much fun too. Glurrrg, Glogg, Gloog, Glug.
Metal Monkey
Looking forward to: three boxes of cherry liqueurs for a
fiver at M&S. Not looking forward to: everything else.
Lord of the Nish
Good: glittery frosty pavements, the Christmas
booze run, wearing big coats and gloves, beer/wine
o’clock after breakfast on Christmas day, seeing old
friends come back to Nottingham, getting some time
off work. Bad: getting to work first thing in the dark
then leaving work in the dark, Christmas fucking
shopping, New Year’s Eve - most disappointing
party every year (except the Leftlion one, obviously).
Mr Jones
Good: This winter I am looking forward to getting
a job, earning some money and spending Xmas in
Glasgow with my gf’s family. Bad: This winter I am
not looking forward to getting a job and spending
Xmas with my gf’s family. Oh dear.
Cash Mark
WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR XMAS?
Dear Santa, I want some rest, some good nights out
with my friends and a foolproof cure for this cold I
keep getting.
Jared
I want a spaceship - preferably like the one in Flight
of The Navigator.
Raab
LeftLion at The Orange Tree
Firef ly at the Garvey
Not surprisingly, this is where all the LeftLion crew will be this New Year. Even the
contents of your stomach at the end of the night won’t have as much variety as this. For
hard hitting and honest hiphop, Kids In Tracksuits tick all the boxes; mixing and laying
down the beats to take you into 2008. On the vocals alongside them will be Emcee
Killa from Lost Project and Outdaville veteran Karizma. Stiff Kittens, LeftLion’s resident
DJs, will be there creating a stir with their blend of old school hiphop, funky beats and
electro. You know you’ll want to drink your way into the new year with breakbeat band
Yunioshi (branded as ‘great innit’ by Jo Whiley). So that’s three hot potatoes on one
plate with more to be announced. Tickets will be £10 with a free drink with your ticket,
nibbles and even a tombola!
If you’re after techno, electro and
breakbeat under one roof then the Marcus
Garvey Ballroom will attract your dancing
feet. Host to DJs, including the fantastic
Fergie in recent years, it’s a mish-mash of
shenanigans expected to last until dawn.
Early bird tickets are £10 and the lineup is
to be confirmed.
www.leftlion.co.uk/tickets
The Maze
Stealth vs Rescued
If you want to check out a fine array of
Nottingham’s musical talent try The
Maze on Mansfield Road to sample Majik,
Jimmy The Squirrel, Freaky Riverstyx,
Penny Black, the Mindless Raskals and
10 O’Clock Horses. The perfect balance
of ska-mangled rock fused with dance
hall punk and a rustle of reggae. Tickets
are £8/10 and it finishes when you do.
Remixing legend Erol Alkan joins the
Rescue Rooms for their New Year bash,
fiddling about with the sounds of Justice
to Daft Punk to Bloc Party. It’s sure to be
an event, showing exactly why he won
the Mixmag 2006 DJ of the year. At £25
it’s the priciest NYE around, but on until
6am!
audreyhorne
A dinosaur, a lightsabre and a TARDIS.
Peej
Peace on earth would be nice, as would good will
to all men (and women), but failing that, a big
computer monitor and a chocolate orange.
Cheque
Socks and a large tub of Haribo will be sufficient.
Though if people are feeling generous a one-way
ticket to Bangkok will do.
Baron Von Carlton
How about... love, kindness, shag maybe and no
religious anything.
minimotel
Just The Tonic at The Approach
Alternatively you can shrug off the lows
of 2007 and welcome the highs of 2008
by laughing your way into the new year.
Just the Tonic at The Approach gives you
four comedians for £23.50! So far the lineup stands as Simon Bligh (with credits
including Graham Norton and The Stand
Up Show), Carl Donnelly (the newest
bundle of laughs on the block since 2005)
and Matt Reed who attempts to steer
clear of a real job and to laugh at yours.
Show starts at 8.30pm.
www.justthetonic.com
Spectrum at Dogma
a DiRtY wOmAn
A kitten!
www.rescuerooms.com
www.themazerocks.com
I would like an alethiometer and a piano.
tommy farmyard
Pineapple Juice
www.ilovefirefly.net
Highness at The Golden Fleece
For you relaxed reggae heads, hit The
Golden Fleece on Mansfield Road for the
Highness Sound system. A tight triplet
for over ten years, they bring King Tubby
influences to their Hoodtown home,
giving you a laissez faire end to the year.
Keep your eyes peeled and ears opened
for details of prices and times.
www.highnessroots.co.uk
If you want to end the year with a jingle
in your pocket why not try Spectrum
at Dogma for only £5? This year’s
house party is host to Nottingham’s
own Hexadecimal (causing dancefloor
destruction since 2002), Pete Jordan
(resident and founder of Spectrum),
Obnoxious Frog (newly established
talent on the break scene) and Freeman
(Dogma’s latest resident mashing up
beats and breaks). Doors are 9pm-3am.
Rock City All Nighter
Yes, as always, there is something for you
Rock City lovers. Bullet For My Valentine
have chosen to welcome the new year
in Nottingham and want you to join
them. The usual rock star antics will go
on all night, as will the bar. If this puts
you in unknown territory, down shots of
Jagermeister, pretend you’re in Slayer
and bring your air guitar. Tickets are £20.
www.spectrum48k.com
www.rock-city.co.uk
Wholesome Fish at Deux
Audiophile at Ride Bar
Basement Moogaloo
Tucked out of the way between Carrington
and Forest Fields, Deux is a friendly local
bar that offers a consistently good selection
of beer as well as regular live music nights.
Their NYE line-up features local legends
Wholesome Fish. Tickets are £6 in advance.
A collection of talented local DJs
will be taking on Ride bar including
Raw Hedroom, Rhythm Plate, Frakah,
ZeroZero, Mood Gremlin, Stunt Brothers,
Chosen Ones vs Rogue Fingers and
Supine.
Residents from Basement Boogaloo
will be rocking out the Funktion One
Soundsystem at Moog this NYE. Tickets
are just £3 in advance.
www.face-the-music.co.uk
Now there’s no excuse to sit at home nursing the Christmas brandy! Take your pick but
whatever happens make sure you enter the New Year with music in your hear. Happy 2008!
32
28
listings...
Saturday 01/12
LeftLion Presents
Venue:
The Orange Tree
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 12am
Left of The Dealer, Freaky Riverstyx
and Stiff Kittens DJs.
Wildside Clubnight
Venue:
Junktion 7
Times:
9pm - 2am
Charlottefield
Venue:
Rose of England
Price:
£4
Times:
8.30pm
The Dandelions
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
8.30pm - late
Pure Filth
Style:
Techno, DnB, Dubstep
Venue:
BluePrint
Price:
£5 Adv / £6 door
Times:
10pm – 3am
Makaton (live).
Basement Boogaloo
Style:
Disco, House
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£5
Times:
11pm - 4am
Phil Cooper, Ste Hodge
(Sick Trumpet), Nick Shaw
and Ed Cotton.
Hot Tramp
Venue:
Market Bar
Price:
£6 / £7 (NUS)
Times:
10pm - 4am
Riotous Rockers, GW2M, The Gucci
Sound-Sytem and La La Lepus.
S.P.A.M
Venue:
Price:
Rescue Rooms
£5 / £6
Bring Me The Horizon
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£10
Crowded House
Venue:
Nottingham Arena
Price:
£35
Wild Wood
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Plus Roy De Wired.
Chaos Theory
Venue:
Templars Bar
Messiah
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Royal Centre
£8 - £15
7pm
Stealth V Rescued
Venue:
Stealth
Price:
Free / £5 / £6
Times:
9pm - 4am
Audiojack, Rory Phillips,
Semifinalists, Dave Congreve
and Matt Tolfrey.
Log Jam
Venue:
Loggerheads
Price:
Free
Matt Mariott, Martin Sanders,
Gareth Bidder, The Blessed Ants,
Joel White, Brynley G Jones
and more tbc.
Sunday 02/12
Michael Bublè
Venue:
Nottingham Arena
Price:
£37.50
Times:
7.30pm
Pickled Dick
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£6
Times:
7.20pm - 11.30pm
Neil From Lightyear, Arse Full of
Chips and Change of Scene.
Sunday 02/12
Wednesday 05/12
Establishment
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
The Good
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Songwriters Sunday Special!
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£4
Times:
8pm
Radar
Venue:
Times:
Tom Brosseau
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£6 adv
Times:
8pm - 11pm
Plus Andy Whittle and Yonokiero.
Monday 03/12
Cafe Scientifique and Culturel
Alternative
Style:
Venue:
Muse
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Shed Seven
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
Sold Out
Tom Wardle
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Lucero
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Maze
£8
7.30pm
Tuesday 04/12
David Blazye
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Acoustic Tuesdays
Venue:
Malt Cross
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 11pm
Life
Bodega Social
£10 adv
7pm - 10pm
Bodega Social
11pm - 3am
Thursday 06/12
Deli
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Cool Jazz and Funky World Sounds.
Dive
Electro, Breaks, Indie
Style:
Venue:
Market Bar
Times:
10pm - 4am
DJ Jack Smedley.
7Music Presents
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£4
Times:
7.30pm - 11.30pm
Zenith, Fallen Friend, Millicent Grov
and Minus Sam.
Silverstein
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£8
Tom Wardle
Venue:
Walkabout
Price:
£2
Times:
10pm - 2am
Upstairs the Live Lounge has been
transformed to a comfortable
surrounding where you can relax
and take in the live act.
Open Decks
Venue:
Wax Cafe
Price:
Free
Times:
5pm – 12am
Friday 07/12
Castle College Presents
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£2 / £3
Times:
7.30pm - 11.30pm
Kings of Leon
Venue:
Nottingham Arena
Price:
£22.50
Times:
7.30pm
From The Jam
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£20
Homebaked Live
Venue:
Muse
Ambush Mob and Vinyl[Abort].
Josh Rouse
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£16
Spectrum Nottingham
Style:
Breaks, Electro, Funk
Venue:
Stealth
Price:
£8 adv (NUS)
Times:
10pm-5am
Alice Russell and TM Juke (live),
FreQ Nasty, Baobinga and I.D. Pete
Jordan, Freeman, Dave Boultbee
and Matt Scrimshire.
Lethal Bizzle
Venue:
Stealth
Price:
£10
Hothouse
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Theatre Mag Night
Maze
£4
7.30pm
Nicky Blackmarket
Venue:
Igloo
Akron Family
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£8 adv
Times:
8pm - 11m
Plus Phosphorescent.
Wednesday 05/12
Sam Baker
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£4
Times:
8pm
Plus Otis Gibbs.
Urban Intro
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Boy Hits Car
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£6 / £8
Times:
7.30pm - 11.30pm
Plus Car Crash Television, Bitune
and Numb.
Icicle Works
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£16
The Garden Festival
Style:
Hiphop
Venue:
Market Bar
No Fakin DJs, Furious P, DJ
Squigley, Nick Shaw and Daddio.
O Lovely Lie
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£4
Times:
8pm - 2am
And The Earth Died Screaming
and Her Name is Calla.
Future of the Left
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£8
Mint Ive
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Bunkers Hill Inn
Free
9pm
Urban Intro
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
The Rubber Room
Style:
Electro
Venue:
Bodega Social
Times:
11pm - 3am
Martin Laurie, Nick Smith and Juke-Joint Bryan.
music / weeklies / comedy /exhibitions / theatre
Saturday 08/12
Rihanna
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Nottingham Arena
£27.50
7pm
Sunday 09/12
Panocha Quartet
Venue:
Lakeside Arts Centre
Price:
£12 (NUS)
Times:
7.30pm
Detonation
Style:
DnB
Venue:
Marcus Garvey
Price:
£15 adv (NUS)
Times:
10pm - 6am
Kenny Ken B2B Randall (jungle),
Doc Scott (History of Metalheadz),
Ed Rush (Wormhole set),
Die and Clipz (Bristol retrospective),
Transit Mafia (Detonate classics).
MCs: Flux, SP, Rymetyme and E-LL.
Status Quo
Venue:
Nottingham Arena
Price:
£31.50
Times:
7.30pm
Johnny Dickinson
Venue:
Deux
Price:
£8 / £10
Times:
8.30pm
Ocean Colour Scene
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£24
Supersonic - Live Music
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
8.30pm - late
Psycle - Xmas Special
Style:
Techno, DnB, World
Venue:
BluePrint
Price:
£6
Times:
10pm - late
Psycle Residents, Monkeylogik and
The Laughing Room.
Culture Clash
Venue:
Market Bar
Price:
£6 / £7 (NUS)
Times:
10pm - 4am
Don Letts, The Rev Martin Nesbitt
and special guest tbc.
Noodle
Style:
Electronica, Techno, Hiphop
Venue:
Moog
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 2am
Mike Hooker, DJ Special X, Moon,
Boy, DJ Weiss, Matt Hinton, JoZee,
Slipz, Opticus Ryme and LGM.
Lo Fidelity Allstars
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£10
CSS
Venue:
Price:
Rock City
£10
Jimmy The Thief
Venue:
The Lion Hotel
Price:
Free
Times:
9.30pm
The Messengers
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Plus Roy De Wired.
Drowned in Sound
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£4 / £5 / £6
Times:
8pm - late
Rolo Tomassi, We Are The Physics,
Shut Your Eyes and You’ll Burst Into
Flames, The Jutes and The Score.
Mini Montage
Venue:
Maze
Times:
2pm - 2am
I’m Not From London and Audio
Massage Presents.
Jenny Owen Youngs
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£6 adv
Times:
7pm - 10pm
Stealth V Rescued
Venue:
Stealth
Price:
Free / £5 / £6
Times:
9pm - 4am
Kissy Sell Out, Primary One
and Dollop DJs.
Mass Appeal
Venue:
Muse
Price:
Free
Dj Priceless.
Origamibiro Performing Live
Venue:
Malt Cross
Price:
£2
Times:
8pm
The Joy of Box, Expanding Records
DJs and support.
Minus The Bear
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£10
Rolling Clones
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Nottingham Festival Opera
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£8 - £18
Times:
7.30pm
Jingle Bells.
Fly on The Wall
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£5 / £7
Times:
5.30pm - 12am
Splitters, Giants Fall, Stupid Stupid
Stupid and Steve, Scott Free
and Mindless Raskals.
Monday 10/12
UB40
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Nottingham Arena
£32.50
7.30pm
Cafe Scientifique and Culturel
Style:
Alternative
Venue:
Muse
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Porcupine Tree
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£19
Richie Muir
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Centurion
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£4 / £5
Times:
7.30pm - 12am
Plus A Farewell Fall, A Second
Blessing and Confined To Your
Reflection.
Tuesday 11/12
Acoustic Tuesdays Open Mic
Venue:
Malt Cross
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 11pm
The Verve
Venue:
Nottingham Arena
Price:
£32.50
Julie and Neil Smith
Venue:
Hubb
Plus Eddi
One Night Only
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£7
NCN College Showcase
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£3
Times:
8pm
Pitty Patt Club
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£6 adv
Times:
8pm - 2am
Fanny Devine, Netty Page, Fleur Du
Mail, Minty Darkstar, Little Miss
Mort and The DeVille Dolls.
listings...
Wednesday 12/12
The Slackers
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£10
Subhumans
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£7 / £8
Times:
8pm
Plus Minus Society and more tbc.
Notts Uni
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Rocksox Xmas Party
Junktion 7
£2 / £3
9pm - 2am
Thursday 13/12
Hard-Fi
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Nottingham Arena
£22.50
7pm
Buster
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Approach
Free
7pm
Recognize
Venue:
Muse
Price:
Less than a pint.
The Hot Club
Venue:
Hubb
Dive
Style:
Venue:
Times:
Electro, Breaks, Indie
Market Bar
10pm - 4am
Evile
Venue:
Price:
Rock City
£3.50
Young Gods
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£9
Kris Ward
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Hidden Talents (women only)
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£3 / £5
Times:
8.30pm
Sarah Clifee and Wallace
Venue:
Walkabout
Price:
£2
Times:
10pm - 2am
Radar
Venue:
Bodega Social
Times:
11pm - 3am
DJs Joel, Aoife 3000 and Ross.
The Arcane
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£3
Times:
7.30pm - 12am
Plus Kalena, Benno Blum
and Karl Wakeling.
Friday 14/12
Misst
Style:
Dubstep, Dub
Venue:
Marcus Garvey
Price:
£6 / £7 (NUS)
Times:
10pm - 3am
Distance, Headhunter, Distinction
and Blitz b2b BashyFlash.
The Pogues
Venue:
Nottingham Arena
Price:
£28.50
Times:
6.30pm
Roy De Wired
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Old Basford
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Good Shoes
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£8
Kill Hannah
Venue:
Rock City
Friday 14/12
Sunday 16/12
Thursday 20/12
Mark James
Venue:
Bunkers Hill Inn
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
Folked Up
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Bad Manners
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£15
Margy McMullin Band
Venue:
Hubb
Featuring Hugh Pascall on Trumpet.
Establishment
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Lunarmile
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£3.50
Skaville Xmas Party
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£12
Times:
9pm
Neville Staples Band (formerly of
The Specials).
Manifesto
Venue:
Templars Bar
Trent Uni break up party.
Peggy Sue and The Pirates
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£6 adv
Times:
7pm - 10am
The Rubber Room
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
Free
Times:
11pm - 3am
With DJs Martin Laurie, Nick
Smith and Juke-Joint Bryan.
Evil Scarecrow
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£3 / £4 (NUS)
Times:
8pm - 2am
Plus Black River Project
and Detonal State.
Saturday 15/12
Jeff Wayne’s The War of The
Worlds
Venue:
Nottingham Arena
Price:
£39.50
Times:
8pm
- The Amber Herd
Loft
Free
From 8pm
Mindvox Xmas Party
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£4 / £5
Times:
6pm
New Offenders, The Fideal Effect,
Night Parade and more tbc.
Just The Tonic
Venue:
Approach
Price:
£5.50 / £7.50 (NUS)
Times:
7.15pm
Simon Bligh, Mick Sergeant and
Chris Cairns.
Monday 17/12
M.I.A
Venue:
Price:
with The Rat Pack
Royal Centre
£21.50 - £27.50
7.30pm
Tuesday 18/12
Folkwit Christmas Special
Venue:
Deux
Price:
£3
Times:
8.30pm
LeftLion Unplugged
Venue:
Malt Cross
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 11pm
Satnamstash
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
8.30 - late
Dawn Pickering
Venue:
Hubb
Credit To The Edit
Venue:
Market Bar
Price:
£6 / £8 (NUS)
Times:
10pm - 6am
Greg Wilson, Nick Shaw, Ed Cotton
and Crazy P.
2007 Thunder Xmas Knees Up
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£29
Adam Bomb
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£3.50
Bad Dog
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Southbank Bar
Free
8pm
Supernight / Not in Nottingham
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£3
Times:
8.30pm
Yunioshi, Don Ramos, Orchards,
Fists, Cuban Crimewave and
Sidecar Swampy.
The Creepshow
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£6
Times:
7pm - 10pm
Higness Sound-System
Style:
Roots, Reggae, Dub
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£5
Times:
11pm - 4am
Stealth V Rescued
Venue:
Stealth
Price:
Free / £5 / £6
Times:
9pm - 4am
Nathan Coles, Mark Pearson
and Sam Phillips.
Bison
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£5 (NUS)
Times:
9pm - 2am
Inland Knights and Paul Murphy.
Approach
Free
7pm
Richie Muir
Venue:
Walkabout
Price:
£2
Times:
10pm - 2am
Radar
Style:
Indie, Electro
Venue:
Bodega Social
Joel, Aoife 3000 and Ross.
Two:Minutes Hate
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£2 / £3 / £4
Times:
7.30pm - 12am
Plus Blood Divided, Deny The
Charge and Hellequin.
Friday 21/12
Rescue Rooms
£10
Adventure Club
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£4 / £5
Times:
8pm - 11ish
Josie Long compares, acts tbc.
Christmas
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Buster
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Wednesday 19/12
Mcdonald Bros
Venue:
Maze
Times:
8pm
DSFAR Xmas Party
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£4 / £5
Times:
8pm - 3am
The Parallelograms, Pocketbooks,
The Deirdres and DSFAR DJs.
Farmyard Xmas Party
Venue:
Maze
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
Left of the Dealer, Six Nation State
and Guest TBA.
Audiophile
Style:
Disco, Electro
Venue:
Moog
Price:
Free before 10pm
Times:
8pm - late
Nick Davey, Smokey P, Chosen
Ones and Supine.
DIY and Smokescreen Xmas
Style:
House
Venue:
Market Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
Until 4am
Littlemen, Digs and Whoosh,
and Simon DK.
Doodle
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Indie, Electro
Bodega Social
Free / £3
Saturday 22/12
Electric Church
Venue:
Deux
Price:
Free
Times:
8.30pm
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
The Saltwater Xmas DJ Party
Style:
Funk, Disco
Venue:
Saltwater
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 2am
Alex Traska, Peej and Fran Green,
Matt, Dave Smith and more tbc.
Deviant Disco
Venue:
Market Bar
Price:
£6 / £8 (NUS)
Times:
10pm - 4am
Phil Mison, Deepsoul Three
and Ally Reilly.
Genotype
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Electronica, Techno
Templars Bar
£3 / £4
9:30pm - 2am
Love/Hate Reunion
(Jizzy, Joey, Skid)
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£15
Wibble Vs Psycle
Venue:
Igloo
Times:
10pm - late
Stealth V Rescued
Venue:
Stealth
Price:
Free / £5 / £6
Times:
9pm - 4am
Matt Tolfrey, DJ Hal and more tbc.
Censored
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£4
Times:
8pm - 2am
Monday 24/12
Andy Whittle and Friends
Venue:
Deux
Price:
£5 / £7
Times:
8.30pm
Christmas
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Eve Party
Hubb
Free
6pm – late
listings...
Thursday 27/12
The Wilkinson Brothers
Venue:
Hubb
Guitar Keyboard Grooves from
Sunny Barcelona.
Tom Wardle
Venue:
Walkabout
Price:
£2
Times:
10pm - 2am
Friday 28/12
Roy De Wired
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Misst Vs Wigflex
Venue:
Igloo
Price:
tbc
Times:
9pm
Sublogik
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Maze
£3 / £4
9pm
Dollop
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Indie, Electro,
Bodega Social
Free / £3
11pm - 3am
Saturday 29/12
Ronnie Londons Groove Lounge
Style:
Sixties
Venue:
Grosvenor
Price:
£4
Times:
8pm-1am
The Midlands Dance Club
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
8.30 – late
Venus Reunion Party
Venue:
Market Bar
Price:
£6 / £8 (NUS)
Times:
10pm - 4am
Jamies Baillie presents a night
of music from 1991 - 1995 with
Christian Woodyatt, Paul Wain,
Timm, Thatcher, Laurie and Dean.
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Plus Roy De Wired
Smokescreen
Venue:
Maze
Price:
Free
Times:
10pm
Electronica
Style:
Electronica
Venue:
Templars Bar
Times:
10pm - 4am
The Hu$tle
Style:
Funk, Soul, Hiphop
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
Free / £3
Times:
11pm - 3am
Daddy Bones, Detail
and King Kalhua.
Sunday 30/12
The Glenn
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Miller Orchestra
Royal Centre
£13 - £17.50
5pm
Monday 31/12
Audiophile NYE Party
Style:
Reggae, House, Techno
Venue:
Ride Bar
Price:
£5 adv
Times:
7pm - late
Raw Hedroom, Rhythm Plate,
Frakah, ZeroZero, Mood Gremlin,
Stunt Brothers, Chosen Ones v
Rogue Fingers and Supine.
New Year Log Jam
Venue:
Loggerheads
Price:
Free
Some of the finest acoustic talent in
and around Nottingham.
Monday 31/12
LeftLion New Years Eve
Venue:
The Orange Tree
Price:
£10 adv
Times:
9pm - 2am
The last two LeftLion New Year’s
parties have been fantastic and sold
out fast. This year we have Kids in
Tracksuits, Yunioshi, Stiff Kittens,
MC Killa and Karizma. Join us!
Firefly NYE Allnighter
Venue:
Marcus Garvey
Styles:
Techno, Breaks
Price:
£10 / £20 / more otd
Times:
10pm - 6am
Freeform 5, Elite Force, Jeet, Max
Cooper, Ross Eden and more tbc.
Friday 04/01
Johann Strauss Gala
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£17.50 - £23.50
Times:
7.30pm
Plastic Milk Bottle
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£4
Times:
8pm - 2am
Plus Piano and Second Monday.
The Paul Poulton Project
Venue:
Hubb
Rock, Funk, Blues – sounds like
Paul Simon in a rock band.
Saturday 05/01
Highness
Venue:
Price:
Times:
New Years Eve
Golden Fleece
£10
10pm - 4am
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
Spectrum
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
NYE
Breaks, Electro
Dogma
£5 (NUS)
9pm - 3am
Jason Heart Band
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Wholesome Fish NYE
Venue:
Deux
Price:
£6
Times:
8pm
New Years Eve Party
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm – late
NYE - Erol Alkan
Venue:
Stealth
Price:
£16
Bullet for My Valentine
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£20
New Years Eve Party
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£10
New Years Eve Party
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£8
Times:
7pm - late
Left of the Dealer, Penny Black,
Jimmy the Squirrel, Freaky
Riverstyx, Mindless Raskals
and Majik.
New Years Eve
Venue:
Bodega Social
Times:
10pm - 3am
Sinfonia ViVA New Years Eve
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£12 - £27
Times:
7.30pm
New Years Eve Party
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm - 4am
Sheriff Fatman, Zenith
and Millicent Grove.
Thursday 03/01
The Establishment
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Jan Wendy Kirkland Band
Venue:
Hubb
Organ, guitar and drums trio.
Friday 04/01
Urban Intro
Venue:
Bunkers Hill Inn
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
Charity Gig
Venue:
Maze
Price:
Donations
Emmit Brown, Penny Black,
Apocolyptic Vibrations and Architect
of Autumn. Plus a winter hog roast.
Amusements Parks on Fire (tbc)
Venue:
Maze
Times:
9pm
Satans Minions, Good Luck Fox
and Cuban Crimewave.
Tuesday 08/01
Max Johnson and Company
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Thursday 10/01
Jan Rich, Wayne and Miff
Venue:
Hubb
Urban Intro
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Friday 11/01
Roy De Wired
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Hothouse
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Theatre Mag Night
Maze
£4
8pm
Saturday 12/01
LeftLion Presents
Venue:
The Orange Tree
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 12am
Penny Black, Rebel Soul Collective
and Stiff Kittens DJs.
Noodle
Style:
Techno, Electro
Venue:
Moog
Price:
free
8pm - 2am
Times:
Darkmode (live), Matt Hinton (live)
and DJ Weiss.
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
Wild Wood
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Hidden Talents (women only)
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£3 / £5
Times:
8.30pm
Wildside Club Night
Venue:
Junktion 7
Times:
9pm - 2am
Sunday 13/01
Sunday 20/01
The Establishment
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Roy De Wired
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Monday 14/01
Roy Stone
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Tuesday 15/01
LeftLion Unplugged
Venue:
Malt Cross
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 11pm
Chris Mcdonald
Venue:
Hubb
Wednesday 16/01
Urban Intro
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Kevin Montgomery Band
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£15
Times:
7.30pm
Plus Shurman and Andrea Glass.
Thursday 17/01
Deli
Venue:
Hubb
Performance
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
Richard Howells Band
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Night of Doom
Venue:
Maze
Times:
8.30pm
Hordes of Satan, DJ Mordor
and more tbc.
Friday 18/01
Phat Phidelity Presents
Venue:
Junktion 7
Price:
£2 adv. £4 door
Times:
8pm - late
Girlfixer, Nephu Huzzband,
Bambino, Roller City Facepack and
Dee Christopher (illusionist).
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Ambush
Style:
Venue:
Times:
Random Hand
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£4 / £5 (NUS)
Times:
9pm
Plus Minus Society and Kerbface.
Default This
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£5 adv
Times:
7pm - 11pm
Meet Me in St Louis, Nephu
Huzzband, You Slut! and Blakfish.
Monday 21/01
Courteeners
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£8.50
Kris Ward
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Tuesday 22/01
Acoustic Tuesdays
Venue:
Malt Cross
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 11pm
Sarah Bard
Venue:
Hubb
Plain White T’s
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£11
British Sea Power
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£12
A Wilhelm Scream
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£7
The Mouth
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£5 adv
Times:
8pm - 11pm
Paul Potts
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£23.50
Times:
7.30pm
Wednesday 23/01
Avenged Sevenfold
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£17
Alison Moyet
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£25
Times:
7pm
Thursday 24/01
Dubstep, DnB
Templars Bar
10pm - 4am
Saturday 19/01
Midlands Dance Club
Venue:
Hubb
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
The Messengers
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Smokescreen
Venue:
Maze
Times:
9pm
James Blunt
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
Sold out
Times:
7pm
Linkin Park
Venue:
Nottingham Arena
Price:
£29.50 - £40
Jason Heart
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Funhouse Comedy
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£4 / £5 (NUS)
Times:
8pm
Daliso Chaponda, Elliot Potter and
compere Spiky Mike.
Friday 25/01
Stone Gods
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£11
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
listings...
Friday 25/01
OAS3
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Plus Essex
Maze
£6 (NUS)
8.30pm
Pistols and more tbc.
Magic - A
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Kind of Queen
Royal Centre
£13.50 / £15
7.30pm
Saturday 26/01
The Almighty
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£16
Joe Strange Band
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
T Diamond
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Burlesque Night
Venue:
Maze
Times:
9pm
Plus Essex Pistols and more tbc.
Electronica
Style:
Dubstep, DnB
Venue:
Templars Bar
Times:
10pm - 4am
Sunday 27/01
Robyn Hitchcock
Venue:
Rescue Rooms
Price:
£14
Monday 28/01
Kerrang Tour 2008
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£16
Tom Wardle
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Tuesday 29/01
Accoustic
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Tuesdays
Malt Cross
Free
8pm - 11pm
The Evil Sweeties
Venue:
Hubb
Gay For Johnny Depp
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£7
After The Party Presents
Venue:
Maze
Tam White.
Nine Black Alps
Venue:
Bodega Social
Price:
£8 adv
Times:
8pm - 11pm
Wednesday 30/01
Carmina
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£8 adv (NUS)
Times:
7.30pm
Plus Diarmaid Moynihan.
Thursday 31/01
The Establishment
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm
Mark James
Venue:
Southbank Bar
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Weeklies
Mondays
Rock Jam
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Session
Rock
Running Horse
Free
8.30pm - 12am
Motherfunker
Venue:
The Cookie Club
Price:
£1 before 11pm
Times:
8.30pm - 12am
Open Decks Night
Venue:
Loggerheads
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Bring your tunes and your mates.
Tuesdays
Games Night
Venue:
Loggerheads
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Local Band Night
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Liquid Silk
Venue:
Muse
Price:
Free
Times:
7.30pm
A haven of chilled acoustic sounds
provided.
Crash
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£3 (NUS)
Times:
9.30pm - 2am
Notts’ longest running indie night.
The Horseshoe Lounge
Style:
Country
Venue:
Deux
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Americana, bluegrass and country.
Tuesdays
Accoustic
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Tuesdays
Acoustic
Malt Cross
Free
8pm
Tuesdays
Chilled Out Tuesdays
Style:
Acoustic, Folk, Blues
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Acoustic, folk and bluesy hues from
bands and singer-songwriters .
Wednesdays
Urban Intro
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Followed by salsa dancing.
Showcase
Venue:
Loggerheads
Free
Price:
Times:
8pm
A range of events including acoustic
sets, poetry, visual art, film, dance,
performing art and comedy.
The Big Wednesday
Style:
Alternative, Rock, Pop
Venue:
The Cookie Club
Price:
£2.50 (NUS)
Times:
10.30pm - 2am
LeftLion Pub Quiz
Venue:
Golden Fleece
Times:
8.30pm
Wigflex
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Hiphop, DnB, Dubstep
Dogma
Free
9pm - late
Electric Banana
Venue:
Social
Price:
£2
Times:
10.30pm - 3am
Thursdays
Open Mic
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Night
Loggerheads
Free
8pm
Word of Mouth
Style:
Hiphop
Venue:
Muse
Price:
less than a pint
Bringing you the finest quality acts
for your acoustical enchantment.
Folk Thursday
Venue:
Loft
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
The Fab 4
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Homegrown
Venue:
Deux
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Noodle
Venue:
Price:
Times:
The Spot
Free
8pm
Thursdays
Saturdays
Dogma Presents
Style:
Hiphop, Breaks
Venue:
Dogma
Price:
Varies (NUS)
Times:
9pm - 2am
Road Block
Style:
Boogie, Hiphop, Jazz
Venue:
Loggerheads
Price:
Free
with DJ Daddio and special guests.
Club NME
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Rise and Shine / Funk You
Style:
Alternative, Acoustic
Venue:
The Cookie Club
Price:
£5
Times:
10.30pm - 3am
Indie, Rock, Alternative
Stealth
£2 - £4 (NUS)
10pm - 2am
Jazz Night
Venue:
Variety Club
Price:
Free
Times:
7.30pm doors
Live music and vegetarian food. Full
of relaxed, friendly people.
Live Thursdays
Venue:
Golden Fleece
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Jazzy Thursdays
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Poker Night
Venue:
Loggerheads
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Read ‘em and weep with some
Texas hold ‘em!
Fridays
Friday Fever
Venue:
Loggerheads
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm - 1.30am
Fridays
Venue:
Approach
Price:
Free
Times:
5pm - 2am
Acoustic sets from local artists,
followed by Roy De Wired.
Distortion
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Rock, Alternative
Rock City
£5
9pm - 2.30am
Variegated Saturdays
Venue:
Hubb
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
Sundays
Sunday Jam Sessions
Venue:
Loggerheads
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Jazz
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Bell Inn
Free
12.30pm - 3am
The Underground Sessions
Venue:
Snug
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm - 4am
Moog is Sunday
Venue:
Moog
Price:
Free
Times:
12pm - 12am
We Love
Style:
Acoustic
Venue:
Deux
Price:
Free
Times:
8pm
Eclectic open mic night.
Love Shack
Style:
Nineties
Venue:
Rock City
Price:
£4 / £5
Times:
9.30pm - 2am
Reggae Roast
Style:
Reggae
Venue:
Golden Fleece
Pop.Your_Funk
Venue:
Bluu
Price:
Free
Times:
9pm - late
Jazz at the Bell
Style:
Jazz
Venue:
Bell Inn
Price:
Free
Hubbub
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Hubb
Free
7pm
Saturdays
Mass Appeal
Venue:
Muse
Price:
Free
Times:
10pm - 2am
Saturday Night Live
Venue:
Deux
Price:
Free
Times:
7pm
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simple to do. Use this form:
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Please note. We try to ensure that all
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MAGNET
The only purpose built professional rehearsal space in Nottingham
Unit 2, Davisella House, Newark St, Nottingham
Tel: 0115 9243324
www.magnetstudios.co.uk
4 rehearsal rooms - lock-ups, chill out area & refreshments
Spares Shop - strings, leads, straps, fuses, etc.
Splitter Van Rental & Backline Hire
listings...
Comedy
Sunday 02/12
Just The Tonic
Venue:
Approach
Price:
£5.50 / £7.50 (NUS)
Times:
7.15pm
Rob Deering, Liam Mullone
and Matt Reed.
Thursday 06/12
Martin Davies
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£6 (NUS)
Times:
8pm
Brian Damage and Krysstal, Dan
Bland and compère Spiky Mike.
Sunday 09/12
Just The Tonic
Venue:
Approach
Price:
£7.50 / £5.50 (NUS)
Times:
7.15pm
Mick Ferry, Isy Suttie
and Matt Reed.
Exhibitions
Saturday 01/12
Open Exhibition
Venue:
Angel Row Gallery
Price:
Free
Featuring fine art and craft from
both established and emerging
artists and makers. This annual
event brings together painting,
photography, film, printmaking,
sculpture, jewellery, textiles,
ceramics and glass.
Runs Until: 20/12
Chris Orgill - FeatherScape
Venue:
The Yard Gallery
Price:
Free
A new body of work by artist
Chris Orgill is the result of careful
observations of birds and wildlife
in their natural habitat. Studio
paintings will be shown alongside
a selection of field sketches and
notes, depicting British wildlife and
those observed during visits to
Majorca and Kefalonia.
Runs Until: 06/01
Jimmy Carr
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£18.50 / £19.50
Times:
8pm
The Bootleg Beatles
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£18.50 / £21.50
Times:
8pm
Tuesday 18/12
CBeebies Live
Venue:
Nottingham Arena
Price:
£12.50 - £21.50
Times:
2.10pm and 5.10pm
Featuring The Teletubbies.
Funhouse Comedy
Venue:
Maze
Price:
£4
Times:
8pm
Funhouse brings a mix of
experienced and new comic talent
from around the midlands for its
regular competition. Between ten
and fifteen acts take the stage and
the audience votes on whether they
should stay or let someone else
have a go.
Sunday 23/12
Just The Tonic
Venue:
Approach
Price:
£7.50 / £5.50 (NUS)
Times:
7.15pm
Dan Nightingale, Matt Reed and
guest tbc.
Thursday 27/12
Ken Dodd
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£16 / £18
Times:
7pm
Monday 31/12
Just The Tonic NYE
Venue:
Approach
Price:
£23.50 (NUS)
Times:
7.15pm
Simon Bligh, Carl Donnelly, Matt
Reed and guest tbc.
Sunday 20/01
Just The Tonic
With John Hegley
Venue:
Approach
Price:
£12.50 / £11 (NUS)
Times:
7.15pm
What Paint Can Do (part two)
Venue:
Malt Cross
Price:
Free
Times:
11am-6pm
Up and coming artists Olivia Pilling
and Beth Shapeero present the final
stage of their show. An exhibition
of contemporary, abstract painting
from Nottingham.
Runs Until: 16/12
Saturday 15/12
Christmas Fair
Venue:
View from The Top
Price:
Free
Times:
Various
Unique designer-made gifts,
including millinery, ironwork,
photography, paintings, baby
clothes, wooden gifts, textiles
and jewellery.
Runs Until: 23/12
Friday 11/01
Lace and Slavery Symposium
Venue:
Broadway
Price:
Free
Times:
11am - 5pm
An investigation into connections
between the British lace industry
and the slave trade. Speakers
include artist Godfried Donkor in
conversation with Frank Abbott.
Wednesday 12/12
Friday 14/12
Tuesday 11/12
Robin Hood Up Close
Venue:
Nottingham Castle
Nottingham’s most famous legend
has returned to the Castle. An
exhibition of the actual props and
costumes used in the BBC series.
Find out what goes on behind the
scenes, see the costumes up close
and hear how it all comes together
in the Robin Hood Academy.
Runs Until: 01/06
Nottingham’s Islamic Collection
Venue:
Nottingham Castle
An exhibition presenting a group
of historical Islamic objects drawn
from the city’s world cultures,
costume and decorative art
collections. Selected with help from
members of Nottingham’s Muslim
communities.
Runs Until: 01/05
Tuesday 04/12
What Paint Can Do (part one)
Venue:
Malt Cross
Price:
Free
Times:
11am-6pm
The first part of a contemporary
abstract painting exhibition,
showing works of emerging artists
Jon Kipps and Beth Shapeero.
Runs Until: 09/12
Wednesday 05/12
A Singular Vision
Venue:
Price:
Free
Times:
11am - 5pm
Dod Procter lived in west Cornwall
all her life but travelled extensively,
including to Burma with her
husband Ernest Procter. Whether
at home or abroad, she painted
landscapes, portraits of children
and still-lifes.
Runs Until: 17/02
Thursday 06/12
Birds, Beasts and Flowers
Venue:
Price:
Free
Times:
11am - 4pm
Exploring some of the historical
aspects of our relationship with
the natural world. Travels abroad
by explorers such as Captain Cook
revealed the rich flora and fauna
of foreign countries and stimulated
study and collecting at home.
Runs Until: 25/03
Saturday 12/01
Once Upon A Time In The West
There Was Lace
Venue:
The Yard Gallery
Price:
Free
Times:
11am - 4pm
Artist Godfried Donkor investigates
poignant connections between
Nottingham’s lace trade and
international slavery for an
exhibition of collages incorporating
18th Century prints, contemporary
photography and media cuttings.
Curated by Michael Forbes.
Runs Until: 10/02
First Western Atlas Of China
Venue:
Price:
Free
Times:
All day
A selection of fifteen maps recently
acquired for the Manuscript
Department’s Special Collection
from the first Western Atlas of
China and Japan.
Runs Until: 24/02
music / weeklies / comedy / exhibitions / theatre
Theatre
Saturday 01/12
Dick Whittington
Venue:
Playhouse
Price:
£14.50 - £18
Times:
Various
Dick Whittington sets forth on
the road to London: the city where
the streets are paved with gold,
the city in which Mrs Fitzwarren
and her lovely daughter Alice live
and the city that the evil King Rat
calls home.
Runs Until: 19/01
Friday 07/12
Peter Pan
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£10 - £19.50
Times:
various
Runs Until: 20/01
Saturday 12/01
Twinkle Little Star
Venue:
Price:
£5 - £12
Times:
Various
Meet Harold Thropp (Kenneth
Alan Taylor). Sitting in his dingy
basement dressing room, he
prepares to become Widow
Twankey for the final time. Now the
wrong side of sixty he feels his best
years are behind him. As he looks
back on a life well lived Harold
realises that sometimes letting go
is the hardest thing to do.
Runs Until: 26/01
Monday 14/01
Posy Simmonds and Bryan
Talbot
Venue:
Page45
Price:
Free
Times:
1pm - 3pm
Monday 10/12
Chuckle Brothers Aladdin
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£12.50 / £15
Times:
7pm
Tuesday 11/12
Merry Xmas Everybody
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£21.50 / £22.50
Times:
8pm
The band Mud perform their smash
hit Lonely This Christmas. Slade
perform the world-wide hit Merry
Xmas Everybody. Plus T-Rextasy.
Wednesday 09/01
The Vagina Monologues
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£13 - £22
Times:
6pm, 8pm, 9pm
Runs Until: 18/01
Tuesday 22/01
She Stops To Conquer
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£8 - £22.50
Times:
7.30pm / 2.30pm
A story about two young men,
Charles Marlow and George
Hasting and their attempts to court
Kate Hardcastle and her friend
Constance Neville.
Runs Until: 26/01
Sunday 27/01
Vanessa Miller School of Dance
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£12
Times:
7pm
Monday 28/01
Moscow State Circus
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£12 - £20
Times:
2pm, 5pm, 8pm
Runs Until: 13/01
The 39 Steps
Venue:
Royal Centre
Price:
£10 - £23
Times:
7.30pm / 2.30pm
Runs Until: 02/02
Pantomime Season
‘Tis the season to find things to do in order to keep the traps of Nottingham’s nippers
shut for an afternoon, and the obvious answer is to shove a slab of Fruit and Nut
into their chatty maws and let them enjoy the age-old tradition of watching some
comedy transvestites. And slap our collective thighs, but Nottingham has four Pantos
to choose from this year (and don’t start that ‘oh,no there isn’t’ rubbish – how dare
you accuse us of lying).
If it’s star value you’re after, it gets no better than the Chuckle Brothers’ ‘tachetastic
one-night-only interpolation of Aladdin at the Royal Centre on Monday 10 December.
If you’re hankering to see the obligatory ex-soapstar in tiny shorts and kinky boots,
hie thysen to the Theatre Royal, where Frankie Baldwin out of Coronation Street
takes the lead in Peter Pan, with the one and only Boycie in the Captain Hook role.
Obviously, the true Notts option is at the Playhouse, where Kenneth Alan Taylor
takes the reins for the 24th time with his own version of Dick Whittington, before
starring in the absolutely-no-way-for-kids Twinkle Little Star at the Lakeside in
January (as a fading Panto dame whose best years are, ahem, behind him), and
giving talks about his career in tights and pancake. Shame there’s no red-hot Su
Pollard-action this year, but you can’t have everything. Book early!
www.nottinghamplayhouse.co.uk
www.royalcentre-nottingham.co.uk
www.lakesidearts.org.uk
If you’ve got a brain and would like the opportunity to kill it with alcohol, the
LeftLion Pub Quiz at the Golden Fleece on Mansfield Road is where you should be
every Wednesday, round about 9pm. But come earlier, because it gets rammed out
dead quick. We give a gallon of beer to the winning team, the quizmaster’s Nana
gets on her Bontempi organ for a few tunes, and the Fish Man comes round when he
feels like it. Here’s a sample of what we’ve been asking recently…
2. What kind of meat did Basil spend an entire episode of Fawlty
Towers trying to fetch from a restaurant for his gourmet night,
only to mistakenly present a trifle?
3. Within 50 either side, how many calories are there in a
Big Mac?
4. What was Richard and Eddie’s favourite alcoholic drink in Bottom?
5. How do you turn a rooster into a capon?
THE BROADMARSH CENTRE
6. The Broadmarsh Centre has the largest what in the country?
7. The Westfield Group, owners of the Broadmarsh Centre, come
from which English-speaking country?
8. Within 2 years either side, when was the Broadmarsh
Centre opened?
9. What’s the name of the shop with the monkey in the window?
10. Within 5 either side, how many shops are there in the
Broadmarsh Centre?
LLAMAS
11. Which continent did Llamas originate from, even though wild
ones are extinct there now?
12. Within 3 years either side, how old is the Dalai Lama?
13. Within one month either side, how long are llamas
pregnant for?
15. In the world of Llamas, what is an orgle - a saddle for
carrying things, a mating call, or a female?
GRANGE HILL
16. Name Grange Hill’s two neighbouring rival schools
17. Jeremy Irvine was the first Grange Hill character to be killed
off. How did he die?
18. What was so special about the introduction of Mr Brisley in
1992?
RUBBISH FILMS THAT GIRLS LIKE
26. Which rubbish film that girls like depicts the relationship
between Sam Baldwin and Annie Reed?
27. Which rubbish film that girls like depicts the relationship
between Vivian Ward and Edward Lewis?
28. Within 2 years either side, in what year is the film Dirty
Dancing set?
29. Which musical film originally had Henry Winkler and Marie
Osmond as the romantic leads, but they turned them down?
30. The original Bridget Jones diary entries were serialised in
which newspaper?
19. Within 2 either side, how many series of Grange Hill have
there been?
20. Which well-known Grange Hill character was played by
Erkan Mustafa?
PEAS
21. Who wrote the childrens’ story The Princess and the Pea?
22. Which soul singer’s band had a hit single of their own called
Pass The Peas?
23. In the world of cartoons, who are the parents of Swee’Pea?
24. Within 5 years either side, when were the first tinned peas
put on sale?
25. What was the price of a pot of peas at the proper stall at
Goose Fair this year?
ANSWERS:
1. What fruit is used in the making of Babycham?
14. Michael Jackson’s pet llama shared his name with songs by
the Kingsmen, Hot Chocolate and Modern Talking. What was
he called?
1. Pears 2. Duck 3. 540 (490-590) 4. Malibu 5. Castrate it 6. TK
Maxx 7.Australia 8. 1972 (1970-74) 9. Gordon Scott’s Shoes 10.
86 (81-91) 11. North America 12. 72 (69-75) 13. 12 months (11-13)
14. Louie 15. A mating call 16.Rodney Bennett and Brookdale
17. Drowned in a swimming pool 18. He was the first gay
teacher 19. 30 (28-32) 20. Roland Browning 21. Hans Christian
Andersen 22. James Brown 23. Popeye and Olive Oyl 24. 1895
(1890-1900) 25. £1.20 26. Sleepless In Seattle 27. Pretty Woman
28. 1963 (1961-65) 29. Grease 30. The Independent
FOOD AND DRINK
Real Ales
Real Music
Real Christmassy
Deux, Clumber Avenue, Sherwood Rise, Nottm
0115 856724, 07770 226926, www.hoteldeux.com
35
Oh Nottingham, is full of fun...
illustration: Michael Lomon
words: James Walker
If you want to let out a primal scream these days you have to do it
under controlled conditions or else the locals think you’re nuts.
With this in mind I’m off to the City Ground for a good old
fashioned sing-song where it’s a mix of hot dogs, swearing,
fags and burps. The fans are in their thousands,
amassing on the centre from the surrounding
suburbs. From the sky it must look like some kind
of Santa Claus convention with the scarves, hats
and shirts rendering the once grey streets red.
I’d hoped that the communal chant of a
football match would placate my growing
disillusionment with the world, but
it doesn’t. It only confirms I was
right. It is an incredibly expensive
temporary distraction; thank
goodness I don’t need
escapism every week. I’d
have to get a second job and
the first one isn’t that great.
The crowd are expectant,
offering match predictions
born of the heart not the
head. They are paying for
hope, a more accessible form
of salvation than that once
offered at church. If they don’t
win it this year, there is always
the next. And the next. Amen.
There are many songs on offer
but they are all about the club
or the sheep-shaggers, our
pantomime enemy. But it is the
fans I want to communicate
with, not the team. They have
more urgency in their eyes than
the overpriced first eleven.
‘Who are ya, who are ya?’ They
chant in that flat Nottingham
dialect.
‘James’ I scream back ‘I’m James, who
are you?’
Unsurprisingly, they cannot hear my specifics
and think that I am singing along.
‘Stand up if you hate Derby, stand up if you
hate Derby’ they sing.
‘Stand up if you hate your job’ I reply.
‘Stand up if you hate your wife’
‘Stand up if you hate yourself, stand up...’
But Forest score and my words are lost
beneath the roar.
When they add a second five minutes later I
jump from my seat and throw my arms around
the nearest man. Then jump down three rows
and start to cuddle another.
‘Geroff you gret gaylord’ says a scarf clad
devotee as he pushes me to the floor.
As I get up I point at the huddled players.
‘I’m only imitating our heroes’
I think the problem with this lot is that they don’t
really know how to swear properly. The songs are
colourful, humorous even, but are lacking real
venom. As it stands their insults sound
like veiled compliments. I’m sure
they would be a lot happier
if they really let go, said
what they wanted to say, in
rhymes of course. Perhaps
they should be deprived of
food for the week prior to a
match, or locked up in the
shed. That would get the
creative juices flowing. Not
only would they come armed
with pent-up aggression but
the savings made on food could
be used to purchase the latest kit.
number
one fan’
‘Well I’m Forest’s number
one steward, so ger ‘em
back on or else your owt of
ere’
Honestly some people just
enjoy ruining your fun.
‘Oh Nottingham, oh Nottingham,
is full of fun, is full of fun, oh Nottingham is
full of fun. It’s full of tits, fanny and Forest, oh
Nottingham is full of fun’
Although this is all statistically true they have
omitted a lot of other important cultural factors
of which we should be just as proud, such as
Nottingham Castle and Holme Pierrepont. They
have also failed to recognise that Nottingham
has two shopping centres, whilst our perceived
arch enemy Derby, only has one.
Before I have a chance to start promoting
Sneinton Windmill and other notable landmarks
The game becomes dull for ten
minutes and the songs are replaced
with sighs. One man starts to read
his paper. A small kid gets out his
Gameboy, preferring Super Mario
over the Super Reds. He keeps
getting killed by Bowser and so
returns it to his pocket. Then it is
half time and a young girl from Trent
FM is being ushered to the side of the
pitch, ready for the half time raffle draw.
They erupt, barking out demands.
‘Get your tits out, get your tits out, get your
tits out for the lads...’
The girl denies them this simple request, just
like the wife, the bank and the boss. For the
football fan it is a world of ever-diminishing
returns. But they are undeterred and keep
singing, one member of the congregation
revealing a particularly high pitched
voice. You have to admire them for their
perseverance.
‘Get your cocks out, get your cocks out, get
your cocks out for the girls’
I don’t know if it’s because my more
contemporary version doesn’t rhyme, but it
doesn’t go down too well and before I know it,
someone is trying to lamp me.
‘Fuckin’ idiot’
‘You’re just jealous you didn’t think on it first’
This football malarkey is all very confusing.
I just can’t seem to get the hang of who you
are meant to hate and when. But it’s always
been like this in Nottingham. I’ve only just got
used to blaming the blacks for nicking all our
jobs and now they tell me it’s the Poles. I wish
someone would make their mind up…
RIKKI MARR 2007
I return to my seat and sing some more songs.
Fortunately they are easy to learn. The players
run around the pitch passing their toy to each
other
and
shouting
when they
don’t get it back.
Then Forest score
again, turning a £25
ticket into £8.33 a goal.
That sounds a lot better on the
tongue. A man a few seats down from me flays
his arms in the air as if calling for help. He is…
he just doesn’t realise it yet. Another rips off his
shirt and exposes a fully tattooed chest, either
that or he has circulation problems. I want to
feel part of this mass audience and so decide
to strip off as well, instead opting to hurl my
trousers up in the air.
‘What you doin’ ya gret clown?’ asks a steward.
After checking nobody has removed their
underwear I retort ‘proving I am Forest’s
a new song has begun. They are a fickle lot here. You can just
picture them flicking away on the sofa with the remote, never
able to settle on a channel.
‘Sit down, shut up! Sit down, shut up!’
36
Write Lion...
Rioting, dead animals, tampax and loss. Here’s the latest abridged offerings from the Write Lion forum at www.leftlion.co.uk.
If you would like your work featured on this page, get on there and start posting. Each issue we select the best submissions in there
to publish in here. We would also like to congratulate Jack Twatt for one year’s worth of entertaining spleen and St0gey
for some excellent tutorship. Keep up the good work!
The notice in the newsagents was succinct
and yet full of promise:
RIOTERS WANTED!
The Hockley Undeniable Riot Troupe (HURT)
will meet this Thursday evening at The
Broadway. All oppressed souls welcome. Tea
and sandwiches provided, BYO conspiracy
theories and unharnessed anger.
I nodded to myself and vowed to be there.
Thursday soon came round and I made my way
to The Broadway as directed. A tall, scowling
figure in black stood with a clipboard at the
entrance.
‘Rioter?’ he asked, with more than a hint of
menace, I felt.
‘Yup, that’s me!’ I answered, chirpily.
‘Right: go to the bar and ask for half a Bakunin,
then take the Secret Revolutionary Lift up to
the roof. If anyone asks, you’re here to see Ken
Loach. Got it?’
‘Got it!’
The Nottingham Riots
occupied by two extravagantly bearded
figures deep in conversation. I guessed them
to be Ronnie and Ralphy Tweet: the two most
famous Nottingham Rioters of their generation.
They’d manned more barricades than I’d had
hot dinners and their Molotov Cocktails were
admired worldwide. I made my way over to
them, somewhat nervously.
‘Excuse me, err, Mister and Mister Tweet, but
can I just say what a great turn-out this is. You
must be chuffed… both of you!’
‘Aye its not bad,’ Ronnie replied in a
surprisingly friendly manner, ‘Not bad at all.
We thought we wouldn’t get that many in,
what with The Anarchists having their pub
quiz tonight.’
With that I was in. The Secret Revolutionary
Lift whisked me upwards as the faint sound
of The Clash’s Bankrobber echoed in my ears.
So far I hadn’t seen a soul other than clipboard
man and I was wondering how many other
rioters might show up. Ten? Twenty? Fifty?
Who knew? It was all new to me, the rioting
game. The lift stopped with a lurch and I
walked into a large conference-type room
packed full of eager rioters. Blimey. There must
have been a good couple of hundred people in
there at least. A hum of excitement hovered
around the room as rioter chatted to rioter,
or helped themselves to a cup of tea and a
sandwich.
‘Not to mention The Communists’ Chicken-InA-Basket night at The Gladstone,’ chipped in
Ralphy. ‘Aye, we’ve done alright I reckon.’ He
looked me up and down with the miss-nothing
eyes of the experienced revolutionary. ‘What’s
yer name son, not seen you around before? You
any good at chucking bricks at all?’
Amongst the throng I could just make out at
far end of the room a small stage, currently
Ronnie nodded sagely. ‘Aye, well that all
‘Michael’s my name and I can chuck half a
brick as far as any man in the East Midlands
I reckon. I was a champion javelin-thrower
at school so that’s probably where I get my
good arm from. I’m a fast runner too and I’m
properly ready to smash the state. It’s really
been pissing me off recently, y’know.’
Mermaid Jaded
Bikini wax and Tampax
True love doesn’t die,
Or ask why…
It simmers, boils, shakes,
Keeps the maid often awake,
In the head,
Through the thoughts
It travels,
Unravels,
The mysteries of the heart,
Remain intact - always a part
Of how she feels,
Inside revealed
Naked.
Trephining the soul,
Of the maid
Unleash continuous thoughts?
The mermaid at sea caught,
Energy abort?
Did the mermaid know in reality?
About love’s insanity.
Thus, the water does flow…
Wild sea and mermaid
They grow
Wisdom of detachment,
Replicating re-enactment
The mistake of the mermaid,
Lost herself…
Slowly faded…
Into the sea
Jaded....
I went to Thomas Cook one day,
To book myself a holiday,
A nice late deal to go to Spain,
Couldn’t wait to board the plane.
Sara
Straight to the clothes shops I then go
I had a lot to buy you know,
Flip flops, sun cream and a bra with a
strapless back,
I realise I’m a tad hairy,
I need a bikini wax.
I hate those things,
They make me cringe,
But I refuse to wear bikini’s,
With a pubic fringe.
I’m in such a rush, I forget
There is just one little snag
In all my rushing sorting things I
Forgot I was on the rag.
Hen
Henrycat
My little mate
Tapping me
Pawing my hair
Purring under the duvet
Curled in my lap
Bounding up and down the hallway
Filthy protests about my liaisons
Watching us
Watching me
Company to my distress
I took you for granted
Your witness to my shame
sounds cushty. If you go off and see Marjorie
over there, she’ll sort you out.’ He pointed to
a large middle-aged woman pouring tea from
a large pot in the corner. ‘Now if you’ll excuse
us, we’ve got a roomful of righteous anger to
rouse, haven’t we Ralphy?’ I left the infamous
pair to tune up and pushed through the crowd
to get to Marjorie who quickly produced some
forms to sign before grabbing me roughly by
the arm and pulling me tightly to her ample
bosom.
‘Here. Yer not undercover are ya?’
‘Who me? Undercover? No chance Marjorie:
I’m up for a new world order, big time. Bang up
for it. Let’s have it!’
‘Good, cos if you were….’ Marjorie tailed off
but left me in no doubt what she thought of
undercovers. Ronnie and Ralphy Tweet were
now ready to address the crowd.
‘Good evening people, and thanks for turning
out for tonight’s little do. Ralphy and I would
like to welcome you all most sincerely. First
things first though, and can we just start by
thanking Marjorie Hewitt for her hard work not
just tonight but over the last twenty-five years
of local revolutionary activity. Big round of
applause for Marjorie!’
‘Now then, we’ve called this meeting
because its time for action people! We can
no longer just sit back and take all the shit
the government gives us. Am I right brothers
and sisters?’ We assured him he was. ‘They
think we’re stupid, that we’ll go along with
‘Oh crappin’ Christ, now what?’ I said,
I need this Bikini wax,
I know I thought to myself,
I will buy some Tampax.
Back on track and on my way,
With my grotty thong attached,
So they can style and rip and tear,
My golden vagina patch.
Now on the table legs apart,
I feel the pain and ripping start,
I want to grab the woman’s fat head,
But I just grit my teeth instead.
She yaks away about her last night out,
And accidentally pulls my tampax out,
She screams and nearly has a fit,
While I’m lying there like a prize tit.
Bonus.
Miss Caulton
Your witness to my every secret
Tail tapping
Squeaking at birds
A dash out the cat flap
Scrambling against me
Crying on the way to the vet
Chewing my spider plants
Falling off the window sill
Licking the gravy and mewing for more
Clawing under the bed
I have lost you now.
To the eternal magical nothingness
The empty space where my father has gone.
the vilest of their plans but let me tell you
right here and now: We won’t!’ Ronnie roared
the last two words out, unfortunately causing
Marjorie to spill her tea. Marjorie muttered
something under her breath that sounded like
‘twat’. Ronnie continued.
‘The question, people, is what do we do about
it? How do we free ourselves from the tyranny
of the state? What can we do to turn back
the powers of darkness and lead ourselves
back into the promised land?’ Ronnie let the
question hang in the air until a small voice
piped up:
‘I know.’ It was Dominic Stuart, Nottingham’s
fiercest child rioter. Being of limited stature
and fleet of foot, Dominic Stuart was able to
penetrate enemy lines without detection time
and again and as such had performed many
acts of the utmost bravery. ‘Why don’t we
remove all the books from the libraries and
replace them with lions and tigers! They’d eat
the librarians to begin with and then when
the council send people round to see what had
happened to the librarians they’d eat them.
It’d be brilliant propaganda for the cause I
reckon.’ He looked around eagerly for support
but whilst his courage was undoubted his
strategic skills were pretty poor and no one
looked convinced in the slightest.
‘Thanks Dominic for that,’ said Ralphy Tweet,
‘definitely one to think about. As it happens,
Ronnie and I have formulated an exceedingly
devious plan ourselves. Now listen up,
because this is important…..’
Cal Gibson
One short poem
Cockroaches will talk to me tonight
and moths, spiders and worms as
well
They will all talk to me tonight
In exchange
I will let them eat from my soul
so that they do not starve
and keep talking
to me.
Daniel R
Haiku
Haikus are easy
But sometimes they don’t
make sense
Refrigerator
St0gey
The End
A fly - his name was Jimmy landed on the window, minding his
own business. Two seconds later,
he felt a strong draft and had just
enough time to see the headline
‘Nottingham 4th worst place to live
in UK’. The End
Harry Wilding
Wendy House
37
Aries (March 21 - April 20)
Libra (September 24 - October 23)
Curiosity may have killed the cat, but laziness is the primary reason for its decomposition in the
middle of your living room floor. You really want to have a clean of your flat every now and again,
especially if you plan to entertain guests. Nothing puts a friend off visiting again quite like a
rotting animal corpse on the shagpile.
If I was a gambling man, which I most certainly am, I’d put a bet on you having a few good nights
out this winter. Just remember the golden rules: If they look good after six pints it might be worth
getting a second opinion. If your mate says they look good after he’s had six pints then it’s fair
game. If you can’t see anymore, try it anyway.
Taurus (April 21 - May 21)
Scorpio (October 24 - November 22)
The darkness is everywhere. But frequently the accomplice to the crime is our own indifference.
They say that power corrupts, but actually it’s just that power attracts those who live in the
darkness. The sane are just distracted by better things and let others get away with it.
The hair all over your back and shoulders is not that of a human. You are part wolf and part
monkey, something you have suspected deep down for a while. This should help with explaining
all those bad nights of sleep you’ve had and the ripped clothes and bloodstains you find when you
wake in the mornings. Stop killing chickens!
Gemini (May 22 - June 22)
It was KRS-One who came to Nottingham and told us that principles are our condoms and that
if we wear them, the industry can’t affect us. Try to live to that, regardless of what industry you
work in. They might be able to shun you and force you out, but they will never take your mind.
Cancer (June 23 - July 23)
Corruption and hypocrisy ought not to be inevitable products of democracy, as they undoubtedly
are today. The more corrupt a society, the more laws it has to showcase, whereas a man who lives
alone has no laws. Corruption is authority plus monopoly minus transparency.
Leo (July 24 - August 23)
What is it that we’re actually celebrating and why can we only do this once a year? After you take
all the tinsel and the wrapping away what’s left? We have love, we have our families and we have
time off work as part of the holiday structure of an outdated religion. What more do you need, hey?
Sponsorship?
Virgo (August 24 - September 23)
You’re about to learn that words can hurt, especially those written in the demon alphabet of
Goatface the soul drinker. I’ll be scratching ‘the bitch’ and ‘whoredog’ into various part of your
skin via a voodoo doll over the next month or so with the set of fancy pens Satan left under my
tree. This writer has now turned to the darkside…
Sagittarius (November 23 - December 22)
You’ve learned an important lesson about violence this week, specifically what can happen when
you’re not very good at it. In your drunken stupor you decided to pick on the ‘short guy’ without
realising he was the Dwarf Ultimate Fighting Champion. Now both your pride and your face is
hurting.
Capricorn (December 23 - January 19)
On one hand everyone warned you that nothing good would come of dishonesty, but on the other
you’re perfectly happy with all the mediocre stuff that did. When they say that crime doesn’t pay,
what they mean is that it doesn’t pay much and that you should feel some kind of moral guilt as
you sit there with your big screen TV. You’re watching Friends on your own again.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 19)
Are you reading this? If so it must be a bit weird. For ages you saw the best of me and then you
saw the worst. I can’t fault you for not wanting to see anymore. Anyway, this Christmas think at
least once about the fun, like kids running from cabbies or a train ride to Brighton. There were lots
of those. But the bad was worse than the good was good. Bye.
Pisces (February 20 - March 20)
What right have you to be merry? You’re poor enough. If I could work my will any idiot who goes
around with a Merry Christmas on his lips would be cooked with his own turkey and buried with a
stake of holly through his heart.
NOTTINGHAM IN 2008
Population: 279,000
Bars in town: 350+
r:
Sports stor y of the yea
promotion
Forest and Notts get
tre (metres): 45,000
Size of Broadmarsh Cen
Tram lines in town: 1
38
NOTTINGHAM IN 8002
Population: 4 billion
Bars in town: 1 - set in
‘Tales of Brian Clough
Sports stor y of the yea ’ museum
r: Nottingham
Crimewave win Europe
an Rollerball Cup
Size of Broadmarsh Cen
tre (metres):
Covers Derbyshire and
Leicestershire
Tram lines in town: 1
(Line2 coming in 8004)

the magazine as a pdf

Transcription

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