GRATITUDE and Hope - HEART Business Journal For Women
Transcription
GRATITUDE and Hope - HEART Business Journal For Women
WINTER 2010 VOLUME 2 - ISSUE 10 GRATITUDE and Hope READY FOR A FRESH START IN 2011? GET STARTED WITH OUR HEART JOURNAL EXERCISE! PROFILING ROSE REISMAN, GINA LI AND SANDRA LEVITIN POWERHOUSE WOMEN WITH UNSTOPPABLE DRIVE! DISCOVER THE STEPPING STONES TO SELF-CONFIDENCE™ LIGHTENING UP WITH TANIS HELLIWELL MENTORSHIP FOR CAREER AND LIFE SUCCESS “Not what we have But what we enjoy Constitutes our abundance.” John Petit-Senn features 18 Winter 2010 - Issue 10 16 PROFILING POWERHOUSE WOMEN WITH UNSTOPPABLE DRIVE 18 21 24 Rose Reisman - Founder of Rose Reisman Catering, Author of over 18 best selling cookbooks Gina Li – Director of Asian Markets, Multicultural Banking,Scotiabank Group Sandra Levitin - Founder and Editor-in-chief, Kalon Women Digital Magazine and Kalon Women Radio 32 32 STEPPING STONES TO SELF-CONFIDENCE 46 LIGHTENING UP 58 LOVE LIFE AND LIFE WILL LOVE YOU BACK 46 58 48 issue#4.indd 48 HEaRTBuSINESSJOuRNaL.cOM JaNuaRY/FEBRuaRY 20 inside look WINTER 2010 Volume 2 Issue 10 IN EVERY ISSUE 6 At the Heart of It UPFRONT 8 The Joys of Prospecting 9 Presentations Tips for Accountants 10 Take the time to celebrate your successes 11 Timeless words in a changing world MENTORSHIP IN STYLE 12 Holiday Style Tips 14 How to Be the Hostess Extraordinaire this Season! PROFILE 18 Rose Reisman 21 Gina Li 24 Sandra Levitin 32 36 38 40 44 Stepping Stones to Self-confidence Emotional Intelligence is Becoming More Important to Employers HEART Journal Exercise Using the MBTI® Tool as a Strategic Business Resource Could you Do What They Did? Reflecting on the Chilean Miners Triumph PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT EDITOR’S FEATURE 27 Dig Deep... 46 48 52 54 56 Lightening Up Chasing the ELUSIVE State of consciousness Growth – Change – Gratitude On Gratitude Gratitude Takes Two BODY AND SOUL 58 Love Life and Life will Love you Back ON THE PULSE 60 A Girls Guide to Champagne EDITOR’S FEATURE Dig Deep... 27 Winter 2010 – Issue 10 www.HEARTbusinessjournal.com FOUNDER / EDITOR-IN-CHIEF: BRENDA WOOD PUBLISHER: EKG MARKETING INC. CREATIVE (INCLUDING WEB): ATILA DAMINELLI GENERAL ADVERTISING SALES NATIONAL SALES: [email protected] CIRCULATION, MARKETING, & COMMUNICATIONS CIRCULATION DIRECTOR: EKG MARKETING INC. CONTRIBUTING WRITERS: NICOLE ATTIAS, CHERYL BREUKELMAN, LORNA LONDON, ERIN NADLER, JEFF BORIS, LIZ PALMER, LOIS RAATS, JUDY BRADT, KAREN WOOLLEY, LISA CALDAS KAPPESSER, DARCEY-LYNN MARC, LYNNE HUSSEY, TAYLOR WILLIAMS, TANIS HELLIWELL, DOROTHY RATUSNY EXPERT CONTRIBUTORS AND HEART FEATURE WRITERS: JACKIE RAMLER, JACLYN WILLIAMS, AMANDA CARDINAL, ZANNE CAMERON, TANIS HELLIWELL, DR. SUSAN BIALI ALL SUBSCRIPTION ENQUIRIES: [email protected] SUBMISSIONS POLICY: PROPOSALS AND MANUSCRIPTS MUST BE ACCOMPANIED BY SELF-ADDRESSED ENVELOPES AND SUFFICIENT POSTAGE OTHERWISE THEY WILL NOT BE RETURNED OR ACKNOWLEDGED. WHILE THE PUBLISHER WILL TAKE ALL REASONABLE CARE, THEY WILL NOT BE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE LOSS OF ANY MANUSCRIPT, DRAWING, OR PHOTOGRAPH. WRITE TO US AT HEART BUSINESS JOURNAL FOR WOMEN®, 607 TALBOT ST., LONDON, ON, N6A 2T2 OR EMAIL US: [email protected], SUBJECT: SUBMISSION. The opinions expressed herein are those of the respective authors and not necessarily those of HEART Business Journal for Women® or EKG Marketing Inc. Neither HEART Business Journal for Women® nor EKG Marketing Inc. will be liable for any damages or losses, however sustained, as a result of the reliance on, or use by a reader or any other person of, any information, opinions or products expressed, advertised or otherwise contained herein. No part of this magazine may be reproduced or duplicated without the written permission of the publisher. The publisher accept no responsibility for unsolicited manuscripts or other material including colour transparencies. ©2010 HEART BUSINESS JOURNAL FOR WOMEN® ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ® 2010 HEART BUSINESS JOURNAL FOR WOMEN IS A REGISTERED TRADEMARK OF EKG MARKETING INC. AT THE HEART OF IT Brenda Wood, Editor-In-Chief “Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” Gandhi I encourage you to work through our HEART BJFW Journal exercise this issue. Dig deep, be honest and be brave when thinking about 2011. You are the only one who can make changes in your life to achieve your goals. You chose – even if that means you chose to do nothing. I hope you chose to use this issue as a vehicle for change. Use this issue to capture your goals, your dreams and to create the action plan to make it happen. T This issue is all about GRATIUTDE; reflecting on 2010 capturing the positive aspects; your successes, your commitment to growth and your tenacity to see projects competed. It is also about recognizing the people in your life that are supporting your dreams and who boost your spirits making this journey more enjoyable and textured. And while in that positive, grateful frame of mind, we ask you to think about the year ahead. What are your goals and dreams; what’s on your bucket list and who do you want to spend more time with? The past few years have been challenging for many individuals, corporations, small business owners and employees. Instead of looking at this time with despair; try to see the light within the situation. If you think about the miners in Chile, try to imagine what they endured and how they maintained a positive, resilient mentality. 6 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM And when you read about the fabulous women featured in our profile section this issue; Rose Reismen, Gina Li and Sandra Levitin, I am confident you will feel inspired and somewhat in awe of the tremendous challenges each has overcome to achieve successful and fulfilling careers. And as with each issue, we have a number of hard hitting articles from our coaching and career professionals to give you the tools and discipline needed to reach your goals. I sincerely hope you enjoy reading and journaling in this issue. I would also like to take this opportunity to thank you once again for your continued support and readership. I am grateful to all who have supported HEART BJFW over the past two years and those who help spread word about our publication. Your collective support keeps HEART beating. Y Sincere thanks and warmest regards Brenda Wood Editor-in-chief, HEART BUSINESS JOURNAL FOR WOMEN® WINTER 2010 This space generously donated. Photo © Brendan Bannon/CARE If you’re going to mend a war-torn country, you need the right tools. When empowered with the right tools and the opportunity to start businesses, women in Africa can help end conflict. They generate new income, improving conditions for all. But they need resources to get started. That’s why CARE is working to accelerate access to basic financial services. Now is the time for action. She has the power to change her world. You have the power to help her do it. WINTER 2010 Join us… CARE.CA | 1-888-324-2234 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 7 UPFRONT By Cheryl Breukelman ANNUAL DEBRIEF TOOL Take the time to cele your successes T Take the time to celebrate your successes 1. What were your greatest successes? 2. What accomplishments are you most proud of? 3. What did you learn this year? 4. How have you evolved? 5. What are you most grateful for? Gratitude and cel his time of year is characteristically 6. Who are the people in your life who have made workplace is also tim a time of giving, thanks and the biggest difference to you this past year? time this month to celebration. We spend time with our 7. How have you acknowledged them? celebrate in your bu friends and family, exchanging gifts, 8. What important things do you want to accomplish you spend to take st taking part in meaningful events and or change about your business? rituals. We make time to enjoy life and 9. What do you want most for yourself this and acknowledge su relevant and meani one another. coming year? Giving, thanks an In our business wetohave equal 10.What couldlives, you do bring an more joy into your you the chance to fe opportunity to experience and enjoy the life this year? benefits of giving, thanks and celebration and enjoy your acco This time of year is characteristically a time of giving, thanks during this holiday time. Typically, we likely aren’t aware o and celebration. We spend time with our friends and family, what we do. “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life,” says Melody Beattie,because you simply are eager to complete a task, cross it off exchanging gifts, taking part in meaningful events and rituals. best-selling author. “It turns what we have into enough and more. It andIthaven’t taken t ourturns to-do list move chaos on to We make time to enjoy life and one another. denial intoand acceptance, to the order,next confusion to clarity. can By doing so, you allo item as quickly asa possible. turnofa business meal into a feast, a house into home, a stranger into a friend. In our business lives, we have an equal opportunity to of our past,efficiency brings peace are for today and creates opportunity to expe WeGratitude believemakes thatsense speed and experience and enjoy the benefits of giving, thanks and a vision for tomorrow.” celebration during this holiday time. Typically, we are eager critical, cramming as much as we can into hard work. Would th to complete a task, cross it off our to-do list and move on to a day just to stay onaretop of things in order to those Life and business all about relationships; acknowledge whoran play past the fin the next item of business as quickly as possible. We believe a part in your success. thanks toI’m yoursure suppliers, your clients race? If there was n be competitive. On Expressing these points, that speed and efficiency are critical, cramming as much and your employees strengthens bonds. Whether you send them a gift, Think of that red rib people require no convincing. as we can into a day to stay on top of things in order to be most take them out for a holiday lunch, mail a card or simply thank them with competitive. On these points, I’m sure most people require a handshake for their contributions, it doesn’t matter what you do, it just no convincing. Gratitude and celebration in the workplace is makes a difference that you do something. also time well spent. Take time this month to be grateful and celebrate in your business life. The time you spend to take “Running a small business is so frantic that it’s difficult to take time to stock, evaluate efforts and acknowledge successes is critical, reflect.” says Simon Geoghegan, president Solutions IT Canada. “Forcing relevant and meaningful, too. yourself to do so, and sharing the experience with staff and key partners can create a real sense of pride and motivation.” Giving, thanks and celebration allow you the chance to feel your success and enjoy your accomplishments. You likely People enjoy being appreciated. Create a connection and show them that aren’t aware of many of them, simply because you are moving they are valued. so fast and haven’t taken time to enjoy them. By doing so, you allow yourself the opportunity to experience the joy of Every year, I enjoy taking my clients through this annual debrief tool. I your hard work. Would the race be as fun if you just ran past encourage you to take an hour out of your day to reflect on these questions the finish line into the next race? If there was no red ribbon before you move forward in 2011. Y to win? Think of that red ribbon as the time you carve out to create a sense of gratitude. HAPPY HOLIDAYS! Hillfield Strathella The act of celebration is your record of achievement. It commemorates the win and creates a new positive memory to be enjoyed forever. This is part of being alive and enjoying 8 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM Cheryl Breukelman & Associates has coached people in more than 40 organizations across a variety of industries. She can be reached at [email protected] or (905) 572-6224 WINTER 2010 UPFRONT your target market: Where does this person shop? What does this person do for fun? How educated is this person? Where would this person go out for dinner? What kind of outfit would this person wear on a first date? Job interview? By bulking up character profiles, you will have a highly specialized audience and the ability to directly voice your ad to that audience. 3)Avoid clichés Cliches are annoying, unimaginative, and cause your audience to roll their eyes. By using creativity, people have a higher likelihood of remembering your ad. They rarely walk away from an ad and discuss the glitzy graphics, but instead repeat that clever slogan or innovative tagline. Words are precious; don’t waste them. 4)Appeal to emotion; win with logic How to write ad copy that sells Over the last couple years, the way people have acquired information has changed. From Blackberry to iPad, many printing presses, advertisers, and journalists feared the death of print magazines and newspapers. When it comes to advertising, powerful words help carry the message, eliciting an active response from your target market. The evolution of writing into an age of technology and social networking still relies heavily on the words you choose to deliver your message. With savvy graphics and cuttingedge technology, some ad campaigns believe that’s all they need to generate an effective response from their target market. Picture it now. Sophisticated design flashes on a web page. A tasteful font style spices the flow of your layout. But clichés or ineffective language weakens the message. Is the picture really worth “a thousand words”? Not if the words in your ad don’t achieve an emotional reaction from your reader/ viewer, enticing them to buy your product or service. So, how do we go back to our roots and replenish the beauty of words in ads? Consider four solid principles of writing that have succeeded in eliciting a strong response from audiences for decades. 1)Voice Voice—a crucial element in good writing—creates powerful messages when used in the active sense. For example, the tagline “Cheddar is satisfying to your senses” uses the “to be” verb “is”, weakening the copy. To employ the active voice, drop the “to be” verb and rely on the one, meaningful verb “satisfy”. The tagline then becomes “Cheddar satisfies your senses.” The active voice quickly changes this tagline to something succinct and impactful. Let the verb—in this case “satisfy”—carry the meaning. 2)Directness To really sell ad copy, research your audience and deliver what they want and need to see/hear. Ask yourself a series of questions to better understand WINTER 2010 People decide to buy things based on emotion and then they justify those purchases with logic. Effective ad copy reflects the psychology of both human emotion and rationalization by presenting something that feels good and then stating why they need to buy that item. How do you do this? First, jot down the top three to five things that would make people desire your product. How will others look at them once they have that product? How will they feel about themselves? How will it improve their lives? Next, study your current ad copy. Does it reveal those emotions? Will it appeal to your audience’s desires? Do you feel like you must purchase that product when you look at your ad copy? Get a second person to look at the ad and get them to describe how they feel when they read/hear it. Finally, add some logic. Get your audience to imagine their life if they purchase your product. Do they save time? Money? Will they feel healthier? Sexier? Happier? For example: What would you do with savings of $3,000 a year? When you invest in our insurance program, you can SAVE more than $100 a month! Take that dream vacation, pay off bills, take a course to advance your career, and more. Simply call this number and discover how you can start saving today! This ad copy encourages the viewer to imagine what they would do with savings—it appeals to the desire to have some extra cash. It uses logic to show what they can do with the savings and how much they will save per year. That way, when they talk about the ad with their friends, they justify their switch to the insurance company by how much they will save. In a trend-obsessed world, it’s nice to know we can depend on this sentiment: good, solid writing is always in style. Y Lorna London is a writer, blogger, creative producer, and editor. She is currently Managing Editor of canfitpro Magazine and has held positions as Director of Public Relations, Marketing Consultant, and Entertainment News Editor. In 2007, she was one of the 12 finalists in Book Television’s reality series, The Next Literary Superstar, based on the international 3-Day Novel Writing Contest. She is currently working on feature screenplays, a docu-series, and an original one-hour television drama. Visit her website at www.lornalondon.com and check out her blog at www.londonstime.blogspot.com. HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 9 Photo by Dmitriy Shironosov - Shutterstock® UPFRONT PresentationCommunication Tips for Accountants Successful Need to deliver a professional presentation but feel discomfort before an During Tough Economic audience? Many Accountants enjoy the process Times of writing out, point-by-point, upfront form a connection with others and this should not be under-estimated. what they are going to say but few understand the power of impromptu (offfigure, you4.will feel tremendous Whether are operating a franchise, a group of sales the-cuff)you speaking and being natural inmanaging their delivery. Strong presentationGESTURE FREELY:pressure to keep others motivated, secure, and focused It is your create an reps, or acting as a Human Resources Director, changing the way skills require adequate preparation and practice well before the scheduled Using gesturesday-to-day. means keeping your duty handsto out of your environment of realistic hope and keep the lines of communication you do business is always a challenge. The recent surge in layoffs talk, and effective voice projection and body language during the talk. It is not pockets or crossed. It involves using your hands naturally open withwhile staff you so they can better your copepoints. with stress. You cangood achieve across many poses only what youindustries say, but how youunique say it.challenges in communicating are explaining By displaying eye these goals with ongoing training initiatives. with your staff. In addition, remaining employees are becoming contact, you will also have a better posture. Remember to so fearful with the economic downturn that they could be losing breath when you are speaking and take necessary pauses 5 PRESENTATION TIPSSoFOR Training and allow businesses to overall survivebody and language prosper their daily focus and motivation. how ACCOUNTANTS: do you successfully after consulting making important points. Your during a sliding economy. While it is one of the first things businesses communicate changes in your business and promote a positive will display confidence. 1. USE THE POWER OF 3 RULE: cut, sales and marketing initiatives should be maintained, and workplace culture? When structuring your talk, have a clear introduction, body and conclusion. training is5.part of the equation. It boosts“SO the WHAT?” overall morale, and it ANSWER THE QUESTION Introduce thanway 3 key points or yourbad audience First, therenois more no easy to communicate news. may Beginlose by interest. makes individuals feel worthy and effective at end ofthey the forget day. Many great presenters fail to conclude the properly. Provide 3 easythe to facts understand examples to explain your thank pointsyou throughout your gently stating in a few short phrases. “Jane, for This is exactly what you want right now in order for your business to repeat their 3 key points, mentioned in their introduction. presentation. Speak understand meeting with me. Dueintoeasy the tochanges in ourlanguage. companyAvoid right “numbers now, we only” to or succeed. Answer the questions, “So what?” “Why did I deliver this “technical” especially thoseUnfortunately, outside the accounting industry. are letting gotalk, of some greatwith people. you are part of presentation today.” and “What do I want my audience to that group.” Pause, and allow the information to settle. Always be Franchisedoowners and other be able to sell their as a result?” Thisprofessionals will help youwill create a stronger, more 2. PROJECT VOICE CLEARLY: empathetic by YOUR understanding Jane’s state of shock and discontent, ideas more effectively by changing their usual approach. Customer powerful conclusion, leaving your audience satisfied at the The tone of yourhas voice should especially if she been with demonstrate your businessenthusiasm. for years. If you are interested support staff will betalk. ablePlan to ahead, speak and to clients with heightened end of your deliver a solid conclusion in your topic, your audience will likely be as well. Notes are excellent, but if confidence ease because they forand excellent feedback. Yintuitively understand the reasons overused or read word-for-word, excitement in the room will die. This is also Expect Jane to react with anger, resentment, or even tears once the behind the changes in how the business is run. They are educated true ifsinks PowerPoint display too manyinwords or are usedway. by the regularly Nicole by management, and managers trained with by news in. Allowslides her time to respond her own unique Dopresenter Attias is a Presentation Coachare whobeing has worked as a means to hide from the audience. To sound upbeat, vary your pitch, professional consultants. not interrupt her while she is venting. Do not give her a consolation CGA Ontario, Alberta and Ottawa in the area of effective volume,ofpace and tone. Make sure you sound monotone. speech any kind. End the meeting on adon’t positive noteflatbyordiscussing public speaking. For more information, please contact her Change will be the her package and by reinforcing her knowledge and skills that will be directly at: only answer for survival and prosperity during DISPLAY CONTACT: these tough economic times. It would be wise to make training an a3.strong assetEYE to her in the future. Always demonstrate sincerity. Accountants are knowninformation for being detailed-oriented exact note takers. ongoing part of that change. Communicating negative takes strength andand compassion. [email protected] Learn to glance at your 3 key points on paper and form eye contact with www.nicoleattias.com participants in the room.thePractice the What room do intothey 3 sections Y NicolePh. Attias - For more tips on how to deliver strong presentations, Now how do you handle rest of dividing your team? need (right, 416-831-0356 anddoleft). timecontinued to focusenthusiasm? on those participants who leanvisit in www.NicoleAttias.com. incentre order to their Take jobs with As an authority toward you, smile or sit patiently as you speak. Eye contact is used to MARCH/APRIL 2009 10 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 13 WINTER 2010 uPFront UPFRONT L to h w h Y f H The Joys of Prospecting Handling first Impressions Many entrepreneurs and corporate professionals have great ideas, great social networking skills, but fathom the idea of cold calling or hustling around town for new business. They stick to their comfortable and usual way of doing things. The thought of having to pick up the phone and speak to a complete stranger may not sit well inside. Some may be fearful about it due to potential rejection. Others may feel they are somehow “beyond” making cold calls. 4. 5. Ask for the appointment and expand on what you do in person. Follow up within 24 hours of meeting someone worthwhile. What your Handshake Says About you Cold calling can be fun, exciting and fresh if viewed as something effective for your business. It has yielded results for years and will continue to do so. There are no right and wrong ways of doing it. You need to find out what works best for you and your business. Being consistent by making your calls regularly and persistent by not giving up after the first “No” is a first step in getting you started. Good luck. Y When meeting new people in everyday circumstances, Once, however, the new truths about prospecting acquired, new greeting practice. In the business sector, handshakes are aarecommon results are enjoyed. Almost all new businesses have been built by areor the key to a successful impression of cold calling, whetherhowever, door to door or handshakes by telephone. Networking word-of-mouth is fantastic, but it takes time to develop fresh leads. and self-assurance. “our hands are introductions to Playing the numbersprofessionalism game is a sure bet. This is even the case when you are doing well in your business and have regular clients. How who we really are,” says Victoria Lorient-faibish, MEd, CCC, Holistic For more information, please contact: else will you expand and increase profits? Psychotherapist and creator ofNicole visualizationworks in Toronto, oN. Attias 5 GENERAL TIPS ON COLD CALLING: Trainer Lorient-faibish says thatCorporate prior Sales to meeting someone for the first Nicole Attias & Associates 1. State what time, you doone in 1 sentence or less. can begin to prepareOffice: her416-221-0817 or his handshake with an exercise Fax: 416-733-2491 2. Do not ramble on about you, but rather in awareness. She suggestsToll Free: setting an intention of what your 866-898-0074 be inquisitive. 3. Leave progressive voice messages handshake should communicate. one can also perform a grounding (one message leads to the next). exercise. “Close your eyes, and take deep breaths. focus on your spine as though it were the trunk of a tree. Imagine your legs are the roots anchored to the ground,” she explains. According to LorientWINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 11 faibish, performing this exercise will create solidity and strength li C r o in M g b s d w fo fu s n a a g Erin Nadler HOLIDAY STYLES Tips With our summer clothes tucked away for another season and our fall wardrobe out and ready to go our attention at this time of year usually turns to the holiday season. The same questions always flash through our minds - what should I wear, how do I decipher the dress code on the holiday invite, and which new item should I purchase for the holiday season? or statement necklace, or try some beautiful chandelier earrings, or some vintage pieces that are one of a kind. First let’s start with what is appropriate for your holiday office party. As I always tell my clients, think of it as an extension of your “normal” business dress. The easiest thing to do and to make sure that you do not stand out for all the wrong reasons is to ask your colleagues how they are dressing. A safe bet is always your little black dress. 3) BELT IT Add a studded, wide or corset belt to your LBD or even your black pants paired back to your simple white blouse and you have taken your holiday look to the next level I have noticed a trend amongst my clients. It seems women are not buying clothing specifically for the holiday season anymore. And why should they. We want to invest in pieces we can wear all year round as well as the holiday season. Making the most of your closet can help you avoid having to purchase something specifically for your holiday events. Assuming you have all the essential basics in your wardrobe ie: the perfect black pant, the perfect dark denim jean, the perfect LBD (little black dress), the perfect white blouse, then the mix and matching is endless. So here a few great items to add to your basics to make your holiday outfit pop. 4) GIVE IT THE BOOT Shoes are a women’s best friend and you can never have too many pairs. Why not try a bootie? The holiday season is a great time to try something new and unexpected. Take your LBD, wear a dark black tight and your ankle bootie. Or if this seasons thigh high boot is more your style, why not tuck your favourite jean or skinny black pant into it? 1) WRAP IT UP Why not take your LBD and add a great scarf or wrap, to make it more holiday choose an oversized pashmina, ruffled or glittered scarf. If your company party is more casual then why not wear your favourite white blouse with a skinny jean and high boot – pop the collar up, add a great chunky knit scarf and you will be the hit of your party 2) JEWELLERY The addition of a necklace or earrings is always an inexpensive way to add interest to your outfit. Why not add some drama with a great chunky 12 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 5) COLOUR The most important thing to think about this holiday season is colour. Go with pretty purples, luscious reds, and winter whites and you are sure to add some glitz and glam to your holiday outfit. However you choose to dress this holiday season, be comfortable. Adding some interest to your wardrobe is always fun but remember most holiday parties involve a lot of standing and mingling so think about the practicality of your outfit before you walk out the door. Wishing you a very happy and easy holiday party season. Y Erin Nadler / Better Styled Inc 806-150 Eglinton Av. East, Toronto, Ontario T: 416-485-5100 ext 225 C: 416-616-3665 www.betterstyled.com / [email protected] WINTER 2010 IN STYLE SCARF - A great ruffle scarf to add interest to any holiday outfit. Photo courtesy of girlsteenclothing.com BOOTS - A great embellished bootie and high heeled statement boot courtesy of ninewest.com BELTS - Corset and studded belts an easy way to accessorize your party dress Photos courtesy of Brave Beltworks (braveleather.com) JEWLERY - Whether it’s a chunky statement piece or a more vintage feel why not try something different like these pieces from Jenny Bird (http://jennybird.myshopify.com) WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 13 IN STYLE Shannon Smith 6. Set the tone of your party from the beginning with the HOW TO BE THE HOSTESS EXTRAORDINAIRE THIS SEASON! Yes! You’ve decided to throw a special bash. If you’ve seen the TV show “Come Dine With Me” you know what can go wrong when there is little attention paid to detail definitely will. Here are some tips to running a well-oiled party ensuring that your guests stay happy – every last one of them. 1. Create a great party atmosphere from the beginning– one that is catching to get your guests in the party mood. 2. Whether it’s a business dinner party or social gathering – a successful event takes time, energy, organizing and cash! Check your budget. 3. Pre preparation is a must. Your social image depends on taking care of every detail. Leave nothing to chance, delegating duties where you can and following up leaves little room for surprises at the final hour. 4. Prepare the guest list with care – include new and old faces, the philosopher, the party guy, the talker, the author, the vet, the stockbroker - in other words an interesting, eclectic group that is stimulating, fun and with different attitudes and opinions. 5. Be the early bird and send out invitations early – everyone’s schedules are busy and it’s important to leave time to respond. 14 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM invitation - stating time, date. The reason for the occasion, address, telephone number, dress code and ask for an R.S.V.P. before a certain date, and don’t forget the names of the host and hostess. 7. Follow up with your guests. This allows you to add others if one or two decline. No guessing games for this hostess. 8. Set the menu to suit the theme. It’s quite acceptable to ask your guests if they have food allergies or preferences. Extra dishes can then be prepared. 9. Shop early. Fill the pantry with everything required – alcohol, juices for those teetotallers and don’t forget Sue likes her dry gin martini. Next, the food and preparation. 10.Setting the table for a sit down dinner or a buffet table should be a pleasure and completed early. The bar comes next. Then of course all your delicious food. 11.THEN, MAGNIFICENT, GORGEOUS YOU – all dresses up in your party best. It might be a wee bit embarrassing getting caught in the all together if an early bird arrives. CHECK YOUR ATTITUDE! ARE YOU IN THE SPIRIT OF THINGS? Remember this is your party – ENJOY IT! Be in CONTROL and be COOL. Above all be alert. This is the time to indulge your guests, not yourself. Y Shannon Smith is a leading image strategist and founder of Premiere Image International based Toronto and New York. She is a TV personality, speaker, columnist and author of Power Manners – How to Use Your Personal Skills for Business and Social Success, a 220 page, beautifully illustrated, hard cover book – a very practical easy-toread guide with answers to so many of the business and social questions that people really ask. Her Contemporary Finishing School Programs for fortune 500 companies and individuals across North America offer customized programs in personal branding – image mastery, charisma, presentations skills, appropriate dress & grooming, manners, etiquette training, executive dining and protocol. Learn the secrets of Self-Confidence; Discover the Power to Influence, Make Success and Natural Part of Your Life. Ms. Smith assists individuals transform from unnoticed to unforgettable…and she personally guarantees it. Shannon is offering her one hour Personal Brand Audit along with an autographed copy of her book Power Manners (value of $332.00 plus tax) to us for $270.00 until Dec. 15 only. This is a great way to experience Shannon’s coaching first hand. A great gift too. Please visit www. premiereimageintl.com or call 416 324 8955 for more information. E-mail [email protected]. or www.powermanners.com WINTER 2010 WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 15 PROFILE PROFILING POWERHOUSE Women With Unstoppable Drive 16 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM WINTER 2010 WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 17 PROFILE Rose Reisman TITLE: EDUCATION: AWARDS: MARITAL STATUS: Founder of Rose Reisman Catering, Rose Reisman’s Art of Living Well, author of over 18 best-selling cookbooks, TV, Radio, corporate personality, Educational Wellness Lecturer, and Restaurant consultant for The Pickle Barrel and GLOW restaurants in Toronto. Rose is also a Wellness Ambassador for the Canadian Diabetes Association and Breakfast for Learning National spokesperson 2000 - Registered Nutritional Consultant from the Canada School of Natural Nutrition 1985 - MBA York University (her BA, in Drama was also from York University) 1976 - B. Ed. From University of Toronto 2009 - Outstanding Public Contribution Award, ORT 2009 - Earnest and Young Entrepreneur of the Year Nominee 2008 - Outstanding Public Contribution Award, Schulich School of Business 2005 – Cuisine Canada Silver Culinary Book Award Married, mother of four children, two German Shepperds and two cats WHAT HASN’T SHE DONE? Rose Reisman is one of the most dynamic and dedicated professionals I have had the privilege of interviewing. At first glance you know she practices what she preaches. A mature female professional, Rose is fit, energetic, dynamic and confident; just a few of the attributes she possesses. For those who aspire to follow her path, be warned, her pace and drive is not for the faint of heart. A successful entrepreneur, wife and mother, Rose is up at 4:30am to ensure she can spend a few hours responding to her emails and fit in a morning workout, which includes exercising her two German Shepperd dogs with a brisk walk in the park. Rose has a schedule that would intimidate even the most driven young professional. C Cooking her way into our HEARTS! Rose Reisman: Mentor and change agent shares the Art of Living Well 18 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM Rose has dabbled in many fields – she took drama during her undergrad, then years later, her MBA. She has been involved in theatre and production, teaching (drama, English and business), worked as a nutritional consultant, has had her own TV cooking show, has been featured on numerous radio programs and is an accomplished chef and author. Shortly after taking her MBA, Rose started cooking as a stress reliever and discovered she had a natural talent and passion for it. It wasn’t until a few years later that she wrote her first general cookbook (mainly desserts and ‘secret recipes’ from famous chefs in restaurants in Toronto and New York) at the age of 34. Rose shares that to secure these ‘secret recipes’ she guaranteed each restaurant a one page feature in her book, promoting the recipes and the restaurants fabulous dining experience. She also candidly admits that some recipes were given to her on the back of napkins or scribbled on loose pages –all of which needed to be reworked completely – as many of the recipes were designed to make 50-100 units, rather than 4-6 people for her general cook book. During that time she was also pregnant with her third child and teaching business at Seneca College. She couldn’t convince any major publishers to publish her first book so she decided to self publish, printing 5,000 WINTER 2010 PROFILE books (at a cost of $30,000, in 1988). To secure national placement she hired McMillan of Canada, who provided basic distribution (for a fee) but didn’t promote her book. To gain greater distribution and to ensure she broke even on her investment, she hired a publicist, who was instrumental in helping her secure radio and TV appearances and other press coverage. With her new found notoriety, books stores started asking for her book. To meet this demand and with the realisation that she would be required to invest more of her own time and money to ensure her success, she started knocking on doors - hand delivering books to Chapters, Coles and other local bookstores. She wrote a couple more books with similar theme but she admits, “It was really a struggle to break even and gain the necessary distribution”. In wasn’t until 1993, when she was diagnosed with high cholesterol that she decided to ’try the whole light world like Anne Lindsay’, but written in her style. Coming from a family with a long history of heart disease and obesity - her father passed away from a massive coronary at the age of 56, followed by his sister six months later; her grandmother on other side of the family, passed of diabetes at the age of 52. Rose became keenly aware of the importance of healthy eating and life style habits. She also realized the value of strategic partnerships and joining forces with a charitable organization. She had been approached by The Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation, to help with fundraising; originally to knock on doors, which she was not comfortable with. Instead, she agreed to collaborate with them and endorse the foundation with her new light menu cookbook , which was also accepted by a national publisher as a result of this clever strategy. She sold over 500,000 copies! She also started offer cooking classes, advertising in Toronto’s Post City Magazine, which combined with her cook books and her own TV show on the Life Network, caught the attention of The Pickle Barrel president Peter Higley. Higley contacted Rose to create signature, healthy recipes that went beyond the ‘heart healthy’ recipe trend at that time. He wanted a more creative menu to demonstrate his interest in providing healthy options for Canadian customers, going so far as to remove hot dogs from his menu (at the time, a radical move for a Deli-restaurant). Together they developed a number of healthy menu options, including seasonal menus twice a year. Today, they have ten unique menus, with six recipes from her new Family Favourites cook book. They also offered the Family Favourites cookbook at a discount to The Pickle Barrel customers, to enable them to cook delicious wholesome meals at home. Since then, Rose has continued to evolve and grow her brand of Catering solutions, including freshly prepared meals delivered to your home (in the GTA area), and WINTER 2010 her Personal Gourmet Frozen line (Meals are delivered FROZEN in vacuum sealed packaging), with delivery throughout Canada. A visit to her web site will provide a complete overview of the incredible range of products and services, as well as the delivery criteria and reach, http://www.rosereismancatering.com. And to-date, Rose has created and launched over of 18 cookbooks since she embarked on her career. As with many successful professionals we have interviewed, one essential element for success is to have a strong support network behind you. Passion and unstoppable drive are also attributes of any successful entrepreneur. Rose has been blessed with that and more. Her husband, a ‘true entrepreneur’ as Rose credits him, has not only been the love of her life, the father of their four active children; he is also her chief counsel and mentor. She admits he is one of her toughest critics, (her children are also very vocal when she tests new recipes on them – telling her with direct candor if a recipe passes the family kitchen test). Rose will float business ideas past her husband, who Rose says “always thinks outside the box and gave her the confidence that she could do anything successfully”. Her husband, founder of The Rose Corporation (a firm involved in Private Equity, Real Estate, Manufacturing and the Automotive Industry), has been “tough on her ideas, but is always supportive”. Rose says “his thinking is very unusual” which helps push her beyond her comfort zone. When she was considering her MBA, as a self described ‘arts oriented person’ he suggested she rethink it. She pursued it anyway, and found she loved the marketing programs. She admits to having a few melt downs during the program, struggling with the accounting and financial courses but was able to lean on her husband (a MBA grad himself) for support. With two infants at home at the time, Rose faced many challenges while trying to reframe her mindset to a more disciplined business framework. When asked if the entrepreneur is wired differently, Rose concedes that the entrepreneur “is always on, passionate and love what they do and they don’t see it as work”. She shares that she continues to wake up early to check emails during vacation to ensure she is connected to her business – not seeing it as burden or an interruption but as a part of her lifestyle. That said, Rose’s first priority has always been her family. After completing her MBA, her husband asked her ‘Now what do you want to do. Do you want to work for a large corporation?”. Rose quickly established her priority of wanting to be home for her children, and from previous experience, knew she wanted something with flexibility and a healthy work environment (no Unions). We touch briefly on the style differences between male and female entrepreneurs, and Rose quickly concedes that she tends to worry and internalize situations much more HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 19 PROFILE than her male counterparts. This is a theme HEART BJFW has heard many times; women tend to personalize and internalize criticisms and failures much more than men. Men tend to acknowledge the situation, but then can leave it at the office. This is definitely an area that, if women can master and learn to separate the emotion (or our own insecurity) from the situation, may allow for greater energy spent on moving beyond the ‘guilt and worry’ to a lesson learned and solution mindset. Looking forward, Rose shares that she would LOVE IT if her children considered taking over the business. With her youngest child off to university, she recognises that they are following their own path but also credits her children (particularly the two oldest children) with a natural ability and potential to take her Empire to a new level, meeting the needs of the next generation. Most recently, Rose has joined forces with York Universities, Facility of Health Dr. Harvey Skinner. Together, they have created the SWAP IT campaign, which focuses on effective educational programs to significantly improve Canadians overall health and wellbeing. Recognising that most people will eat fast food or other convenience options out of habit, desire and practicality, the goal is to identify what options are healthier (the grilled chicken sandwich over the deep fried option, for example) and to make this information more readily available. To read more about this campaign and the Personal Gourmet Frozen line, visit our ISSUE EXTRAS section off our HEART home page. A complex, nurturing and energetic women, Rose has mastered the Art of Living Well and has dedicated her life to sharing her secrets and passion for healthy living. Rose would like to leave a legacy of “making an impact – making people more aware” of the impact their daily choices make on their overall health. At 56, with her children out of the house and many of her friends retiring, she feels she is just hitting her stride and getting started on a joyful life path and meaningful career. This interview and the list of awards have been condensed and edited, by Brenda Wood, Editor and Chief of HEART Business Journal For Women®. Visit http://www.artoflivingwell.ca for learn more 20 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM WORDS OF WISDOM FROM A TRUE MENTOR • • • • • • • • • Instant success is rare. You must stick with it and be committed to doing what is needed (including investing your own money, knocking on doors and building your own alliances). Passion must be tempered with reality – ask yourself is there a demand for your product or service and do you have your brand clearly differentiated in the market? Hire the right people and understand how to nurture them with growth opportunities. Persistence and hard work is critical. Rose shares that Chef’s, particularly ‘diva chef’s can be difficult to manage, many of whom want to open their own restaurant one day and may not like to be told what to do. Rose admits she is “Preaching a particular philosophy; no heavy cream sauces or butter rich dishes and no deep frying. With chefs trained in French cooking schools, this can be a challenge. Rose explains “some will still try to sneak it into recipes any way”. Rose can’t say enough about her GLOW head chef, who is also French trained but is very receptive to her philosophy and helps create innovative specials daily. Know your strengths, compartmentalize your work load and delegate tasks to others. Be disciplined with your time and your processes. Remind your loyal clients why you are doing what you do – keep reinventing and pushing yourself to remain relevant to your brand vision and your loyal audience, who is sharing your journey. Be aware of your own image and message – ask yourself “How you are perceived and received?” Rose confesses that after losing 20 unwanted pounds she was getting preachy. She has learned this approach is ineffectual. People are more receptive to learning how to make small steps for change, operating within their lifestyle parameters. Be self aware but don’t beat yourself up about your weakness or failures. Don’t get overwhelmed when looking at the total picture or challenge – Rose uses the analogy of down-hill skiing (which she took up at age 40), don’t focus on the bottom – try to focus on taking one turn, then the next and focus on doing that well – and before you know it, you’ve completed the entire run, ready to go again! Y WINTER 2010 PROFILE Looking for the perfect holiday gift? Pick up a copy of Rose Reisman Family Favourites cookbook today. WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 21 PROFILE Gina Li UNIVERSITY: Nankai University, China, BA, Tourism Industry Management Rotman School of Management, Honours MBA, 2004 PREVIOUS WORK EXPERIENCE: Travel industry 1991-1999, China and Australia Freight Forwarding 1999-2002, Canada Royal Conservatory of Music 2003-2004 Part-time, Canada TD Canada Trust 2004-2008 HIGHLIGHTS OF OTHER ACCOMPLISHMENTS: Pioneered the Overseas Pre-settlement workshops for new immigrants in China by partnering with The Cross Cultural Community Service Association (across China, have run 3 years, MP Jim Karygiannis is a strong supporter) (2008-2010) . Instrumental in launching Education Forum and road shows for International Students and parents to attract them to Canada, through Canada China Overseas Study Forum and New Oriental Education and Technology Group (largest test prep school in China, listed onNYSE), joined by Counsellor Yi Jun Songfrom Embassy in Beijing) (2009-2010). Spearheaded the China Everbright Bank partnership (2009). Instrumental in building China Union Pay alliance (INTERAC &Scotiabank existing relationship, brought CUP in) (2010). Won Mandarin Profile Award - “2009 Outstanding Profile Award- Professional Sector”, recognized as a successful immigrant, an annual event organized by Fairchild TV. G Going above and beyond... banking 22 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM As the expression goes, if you want to understand someone better, spend a day walking in their shoes. Director of Asian Markets, Multicultural Banking for Scotiabank, Gina Li leverages her own experiences to help immigrants transition with a higher level of security and support than she experienced. Gina immigrated to Canada when she was 29 years old, leaving her family, friends and secured senior management position (working for the largest Travel agency in China), during the height of China’s economic boom. With $15,000 US cash, (sewn into a secret pocket in her clothes by her mom), and starting from ‘the bottom professionally’, with few connections. Gina is acutely aware of the value of arriving to a new country with a bank account, credit card, credit history, and job prospects already in place. WINTER 2010 PROFILE During her eight years working in China, her role was a combination of foreign affairs/travel agency consultant; acting as an interpreter and tour manager for international delegates. Diplomacy is one of Gina’s many skills; she has been trained to handle difficult situations, for example, how to handle emergencies and difficult situations, as severe as dealing with someone with a serious health issue on a group tour (heart attack or possibly dying) or if they got into an altercation with police, lost their passport or other challenges. Gina reflects on this experience and simply says “you train yourself to handle difficult situations on the spot and you also learn how to handle public speaking and managing large groups successfully”. During her tenure in China she was recognized and promoted frequently for her work ethic and strong interpersonal skills. She was so well respected and valued by her employer that her apartment was included as part of her compensation package. While working in Australia, she was offered a position (within the travel sector), which she declined. She felt that Canada was more receptive to immigrants and welcoming for newcomers. In addition, she felt Canada’s proximity to the USA and our North American trading relations was highly attractive. Looking back, despite the challenges she faced, she has no regrets and uses the experience to help other new immigrants make a smoother transition. She emphasises that new comers should spend time in China preparing themselves for the transition. Gina can’t emphasize enough the importance of mastering English language skills, including presentation and public speaking. She also encourages new comers to take time to fully understand their key strengths and vocational aspirations. When she first immigrated she had to start at the bottom. Leveraging her previous experience, she secured a position in the freight forwarding industry for three years – her “survival job”, which included making cold calls to generate new business. Her diplomatic experience and love of personal interaction was a key asset; she eventually achieved the top sales award within the company. Despite this success, she longed to return to her management role and to drive her career to new heights. She quit her job and once she passed her GMAT (she admits to failing her first time but kept trying), selected the Rotman MBA program in Toronto. With MBA in hand, she set her sights on larger organizations; the banking industry was particularly attractive because of the diversity of roles available under one corporate umbrella; finance, operations, general management, marketing or PR, - “you could change jobs without changing companies”. She secured her first major position with TD Canada Trust as an MBA Leadership Associate. After two rotations, she was promoted to WINTER 2010 Branch Manager and immersed in a six month training program. Gina mentored her team to record growth in sales and customer satisfaction within the first year, with many of her staff securing raises/bonuses. She believes the MBA program and connections made during her early years was instrumental to help her transition into the financial sector in Canada. During her MBA experience, she connected with many senior individuals that helped her build her network and gain supporters. That said, she doesn’t feel the MBA guarantees success – hard work, strong people skills, a positive attitude are critical. She quickly achieved recognition from her peers (and within the banking community) and was recruited by Scotiabank to support a newly created department catering specifically to the multicultural markets. Today, as Director of Asian Markets, Multicultural Banking for Scotiabank, she is proud the share the success of The StartRight program - a key initiative developed to help new-comers (international students, skilled workers, investor immigrants, foreign workers, etc) transition to Canada with many of the critical elements already in place; finding a place to live, opening a bank account, get an OHIP card, helping families find schools for their children and assisting with the enrolment process, in addition to helping the new comers find a job. The biggest challenge is getting credit and securing a credit card. Language is another obstacle to overcome. With the StartRight program, multi language support programs have also been created. The StartRight program offers a multi-lingual web site and call center, in addition access to ABM machines across Canada with the instructions provided in five languages; English, French, Spanish, Simplified Chinese and Traditional Chinese. In addition, she was instrumental in establishing a partnership between Scotiabank and China Ever Bright Bank , with 200 (note: more branches joined the program since our interview) branches facilitating overseas account opening in China, spanning 33 cities. This partnership allows Chinese immigrants and international students to set up a Canadian Bank account, secure a VISA card before leaving China. Gina knows the incredible value of this partnership, as she herself struggled to set up her banking and credit position when she first immigrated. Gina identifies that Canada lags behind England and Australia when it comes to attracting and educating international students and their families, a sector which represented $6.5 billion to Canada’s economy in 2009. Today, she and her team host educational training sessions in China to help increase Canada’s appeal and market penetration. A visit to the Scotiabank StartRight program on their web site demonstrates the scope and diversity HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 23 PROFILE of the services available for immigrants including community banking services. Today Gina is devoted to being a strong strategic leader and team motivator. She believes her key job is to motivate others, to not only achieve the business goals, but also to assist her staff to achieve their goals. She is also very involved in establishing, negotiating and building strategic relationships with Asia. Specifically, she is charged with building collaborative relationships with Chinese and foreign banks, to better facilitate immigration transition and business prosperity. Gina believes that building respectful relationships (or as she says “GUANXI”) is critical to achieving success when dealing with Asian markets. She concedes that her Chinese nationality has given her an edge in her current role– when she visits China to negotiate with financial partners she can move immediately into the complexities of the deal whereas international colleagues must respect the culture, protocol and pace of developing a respectful relationship prior to launching into the any negotiation or partnership discussions. Gina feels women are well respected in China and are typically paid well (equal to men). Although she does share that her friends and colleagues in China are working longer hours with less work life balance than in Canada (many actually decline vacation or time off to remain competitive in their profession). Looking forward, Gina is committed to developing her role, her staff and new programs to continue to support immigrants as they transition to the Canadian Market in search of a more prosperous and dynamic future. HOW DOES SHE RELAX? Gina is an active – sporty – person who works out to stay fit and to decompress. Six years ago started studying piano again, practicing every day (she was forced to give it up when she was a child because her family could not afford piano) and singing (Karaoke with friends) when time allows. “I also love traveling and have traveled to many countries in the world.” Y 24 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM GINA’S TIPS She is a firm believer in networking – she actually secured her first job (and her position with Scotiabank) as a result of networking. Be aware your brand image and get the necessary training to ensure you present yourself well. Leverage your strengths and passions – try to find employment that allows you to demonstrate your unique strengths. For example, as an immigrant, Gina leverages her international negotiating skills, strategic and marketing skills within her current role. Continually challenge yourself – set the bar high for yourself - stretch yourself to ensure you are continually growing. Build your mentorship and board associates - with your company, through your networking connections and within your own community/associations. Living by example, Gina is currently on the advisory committee with the Toronto Zoo, to loan Panda Bears from China. Gina regularly revisits her goal planner – every six months or so, to ensure she is on track with her career and personal objectives. WINTER 2010 PROFILE WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 25 PROFILE Sandra Levitin AGE: 54 TITLE: Founder/CEO/Editor in Chief Kalon Women - Kalon Women Blog - Kalon Communities - Kalon Klicks - Kalon Women in Business Radio Show EDUCATION: University of Texas at Pan American MARITAL STATUS: Single (Divorced), Mother of two children, and proud grandmother PREVIOUS WORK EXPERIENCE: Sales Management and training positions throughout her career ACCOMPLISHMENTS:Regional Director - WIN International Women’s Day, NAWBO Houston Technology Board, International Mature Marketing Network Board, Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer and The Harley’s Angels - ‘Ridin for the Cure’ Y You’ve Come A Long Way Baby and only getting better! 26 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM After a career in corporate America, largely in sales management, Sandra fulfilled her lifelong dream of launching Kalon Women magazine; an online magazine targeting women 45+. It all started over 17 years ago, when Sandra and a dear friend started chatting about the idea that all women possess an inner beauty, a strength that we might not be acknowledging or tapping into. We tend to be overly self critical, critical of others and too influenced by the outside/social influences that diminish our self esteem and ability to actualize our potential. During their early discussions, they discovered an old Greek word, Kalon – which means beautiful (inner beauty), which naturally, would become their brand name. Sadly, neither could spend enough time to get the venture off the ground, “life has a way of getting in the way” as Sandra phrases it. Both were working mothers and juggling the demands of career, family and life. It wasn’t until four years ago, when Sandra turned 50, the same year her dear friend succumbed to metastatic breast cancer, that she gathered up the courage to realize their dream. It was the combination of the two life experiences that served as the catalyst for Sandra. Sandra says “She knew if she didn’t do it herself, the dream she shared with her friend would never happen”. In this issue, Sandra shares her journey with HEART Business Journal For Women; a story that will inspire and mentor those who have been thinking or talking about living their dream venture, but just haven’t made it a priority. WINTER 2010 PROFILE When asked what one can expect to read, in terms of the current editorial themes and topics she covers in Kalon Women (pronounced Kay-Lynn), Sandra is quick to identify that “the notion of awakening, waking up as entrepreneurs, is very strong. A close second is elder care; after years of raising their children, mature women now have to assume the responsibility of their aging parents. The third theme she is heavily focused on is menopause, particularly demystifying the condition and the various so called remedies available. As much as these topics are very serious, she believes injecting humour in her editorial is essential for an audience “who can take themselves too seriously”, distancing ourselves from the lighter spirit deep inside. One of the many joys of her on-line magazine is that she connects with wonderful individuals who are eager to support and share her vision. Although the majority of her subscribers are in the US market, her on-line brand is read by individuals around the globe. By being open to ideas and listening to her readers, her brand has morphed tremendously. She started with the on-line magazine of sorts (a blog) but by 2009 she moved to a more traditional on-line magazine format. She also launched a radio show, a community site, business directory, and Kalon Kitchens, to name a few of her new products. Today Kalon Women has over 65,000 subscribers! To generate interest and awareness, Sandra reached out to other women using social marketing tools. Sandra acknowledges that Facebook has been instrumental in helping to build her brand. When asked why she feels her brand has been so well received, Sandra shares that she “Fundamentally believes that women want to help other women; if approached correctly and naturally, if they share the vision of the Kalon brand”. The majority of her subscribers are women but she does have male subscribers. When a male does subscribe, she actually contacts him directly to ask”Why have you subscribed to a women’s magazine”. The most common responses are; 1) I am buying this for my wife, partner, girlfriend, 2) I want to understand women better and this will give me insight into the 45+ female or 3) they were curious to see if it is a male bashing magazine. Whatever the reason, she is always delighted to include men amongst her subscriber base. When we chat about what it takes to achieve the level of success she is enjoying, Sandra is direct when she acknowledges that it requires a tremendous amount of work, dedication and passion. As an entrepreneur working from home, she is often working at her computer at 4am or working late into the evening. Many of her friends ‘talk a big game’ during their coffee visits, sharing their ideas and aspirations to become an entrepreneur, but many don’t DO anything about it. Sandra can empathize with them, but as one who wishes she was sharing this journey with her friend and co-creator, she is now quite adamant when she mentors WINTER 2010 other that you must ACT NOW if you have an idea or dream. Sandra says the key is to make it happen, get out of the house, to face your fear of failure or rejection (of falling off the edge), if you want to realize your dreams. “Just take that first step” and after that, you will be amazed at your strength and capability. The key, she feels, is to surround yourself with people who support you and encourage you – who may not necessarily be your family or current friends. We chat about the various challenges she had to overcome during her career and some of the reasons she chose to start her own business, and we naturally fall into the discussion of ‘that nightmare boss’ and what learning she could share from her experience. Sandra chuckles, and then shares a story of when she first entered the work force; she accepted a sales position within a male dominated sector. As the first female sales representative on the team, and the first female her boss had ever managed, she knew she’d face challenges beyond her new job description. It was while attending her first sales meetings; she heard all the innuendo about women, the inappropriate comments from “the good old boys”. She was told “you will have to wear a shorter skirt and unbutton you’re blouse a little, if you think you’re going to sell anything”. She decided she had two options - either quit or keep pressing on and buckling down (ignoring the inappropriate comments from her male counter parts). Her decision to stay and prove herself paid off -within six months she was the number one sales representative on her team. Within a year and a half, she had been so successful that she was promoted to Sales Manager – in charge of the male team who had continued to make comments throughout her tenure. However, in her new senior role, she was responsible for pulling the sales meeting together and for leading the team. First on her list - as their new boss, she made it clear that she had zero tolerance for the innuendo and inappropriate jokes/ comments and quickly administered their sales targets. Looking back, Sandra admits that having a thick skin and a strong sense self were critical to her success. She also suggests that you must adapt your sales pitch for men versus women. From her experience, she found men want ‘the facts’ - the cost implications to the deal and ROI rationale immediately, where as women tend to appreciate hearing about the relevance to them or their business first. Sandra observes that women tend to like to chat more and build a connection before plunging into the financials. In the end, Sandra feels that whether you have an aggressive male or female boss, you need to realize that, particularly in a sales field, you most likely will not change their attitude or comments. And when you are in competition with your colleagues with a commission salary structure, the competition and stress of the job are expressed in different ways for each sex. Men tend to tease or use sarcasm to burn off steam or to intimidate. She advises women to be in control of what they internalize and warns that they HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 27 PROFILE shouldn’t take comments personally. Learning to joke or let the comments roll off your back, while you spend your time producing results is Sandra’s recommendation. Not only is this approach more likely to help you secure greater financial rewards, you will likely advance up the corporate ladder, putting you in a position of influence to make the positive changes you desire. She is also working on a children’s book, which she is coauthoring with her 12 year old granddaughter. Her biggest challenge to date; the US economy. She adds, “You don’t know what the magic number is – the magic proposition” to stimulate interest. She finds the US market is seemingly on hold – holding back on expenditures and not testing new concepts or opportunities. Surprisingly, US stats indicate that the female entrepreneurs are a significant change agent contributing to growth across North America, yet they are facing tremendous barriers to entry. Getting financing or support for a new business is difficult in the best of times. Given today’s economic climate, women have the added challenge of reinventing, innovating and stretching themselves beyond their comfort zone. WHAT INSPIRES HER? Thankfully Sandra has not had to seek investors or financial support. As a self-funded entrepreneur, she expresses gratitude for her early career successes and a disciplined savings habits. That said, when she went to her bank to open her business account, the bank representative asked her if her husband would be coming in to be a co-signer on the account. Her friends and colleagues have shared similar stories that even today, some institutions still ask “when is your husband coming in”. Recently divorced, Sandra only laughs at this paradox. SANDRA’S TIPS ON HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL WHEN SELLING YOUR BRAND/BUSINESS - Be passionate about what you are selling (particularly for entrepreneurs). - Come to terms with the reality that you have to do the things you don’t like doing – be diligent, follow-up and realise the critical importance of building a relationship over time, not just for one project or that one sale. - Don’t be pushy or irritating when selling – read your audience! - You must be tenacious – stay in touch with your best customer – who are most likely provide your best referrals. Understand the value of good customer service and the fact that this could be your point of difference. She runs, gardens, and enjoys sitting at a café or at the beach with a book or journal to distance herself from her business. And she will gladly be a passenger on her friends Harley when the group heads out for a day in the sun. She loves meeting and interviewing new people; she is always delighted with the depth and texture within each of the women she interviews. She also enjoys sitting in the park or sitting at an outdoor cafe; people watching. WHAT IS IN FUTURE FOR KALON WOMEN? Taking Kalon Women to “the next level, reaching as many women as possible in different cities with seminars and conferences”. Sandra envisions creating a support group or ‘life line’ to connect other women to support one another through the Kalon Women Network. Y *RECOMMENDED READING HEART BJFW EDITOR-IN-CHIEF FROM The book entitled “it’s only too late IF You Don’t Start Now, How to Create Your Second Life at Any Age” by Barbara Sher “Take your SOUL To Work, Transform Your Life And Work”, by Tanis Helliwell “Inner Excellence, Achieve Extraordinary Business Success Through Mental Toughness,” by Jim Murphy HOW DOES SHE RELAX? She writes; she has five pieces published and has just completed a book based on a journal of letters she has kept over the years. The book entitled Learning How to Hop, Again, is a “loose biography, based on her life, her career experiences, her divorce, her entrepreneurship”. 28 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM WINTER 2010 Dig Deep... “Remember, we all stumble, everyone of us. That’s why it is a comfort to go hand-in-hand.” Emily Kimbrough “Set you heart on doing good. Do it over and over again, and you will be filled with joy.” Buddha “Expand your capacity to be delighted” Unknown LET IT GO. LET IT FLOW. WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 29 Where Do You Take Your Submit your photo today to [email protected] to be featured in our next issue Brigitte McKinnon in Montebello, QC - Winner of our photo contest 2009. When you die God and the Angels Will hold you accountable for all The pleasures you were allowed in life That you denied yourself. Anonymous Discover Deeper Meaning in Your Life and Work! “With the seven magnificent principles Dr. Pattakos describes in this important book…let me suggest two ideas on how to get the very most from this book. First share or teach the core principles one by one to those you live with and work around. Second, live them. To learn something but not to do it is really not to learn.” Dr. Stephen R. Covey Author, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People PRISONERS OF OUR THOUgHTS international Best-selling Book - available in 12 languages prisoners of our thoughts offers seven principles for finding deeper meaning and fulfillment in your life and work. Don’t let life just happen to you. inspire yourself and others to achieve the highest potential by not being a “prisoner” of your thoughts. www.prisonersofourthoughts.com MENTORSHIP Lois Raats STEPPING STONES TO SELF-CONFIDENCE I hear these kinds of questions and comments several times each week in my office, from some of the most outwardly successful people you could imagine. People often believe that if they could just feel better about themselves, their lives would go so much 48 would HEaRTBuSINESSJOuRNaL.cOM better, they be so much more successful. NEWS FLASH: SELF-ESTEEM FEELING. IT’S A HABIT. IS NOT A Life consists of an endless series of forks in the road. At any given moment, we are directing our energies – our attitudes, thoughts, behaviours, and habits – down the path that leads to greater selfesteem – or we’re propelling ourselves in the opposite direction. It’s that simple. If you suffer from low self-worth, it’s a good idea to start asking yourself: “Is what I’m currently thinking or doing making me feel better about myself - or worse? What do I need to do differently that will get me on a more helpful path?” Photos by Yuri arcurs & andresr - Shutterstock® I How can I acquire more self-confidence? How can I improve my self-esteem? I wish I could feel as “together” as everyone else seems to be... But feeling good is not the source of self-esteem. The good news about this approach is that it’s something anyone can learn. Have you ever learned how to ride a bike, or quit a useless JaNuaRY/FEBRuaRY habit like smoking? We’re talking skills and habits2009 here, not magic. With creativity and focus, practice and willpower, anyone can develop the skills and habits that engender high self-esteem. Rather, feeling good is the by-product of thinking thoughts, making choices, and developing the habits that build self-esteem. I’m not especially concerned about what your background or life experience is like. Life occurs in the present moment. As the saying goes... issue#4.indd 48 32 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 11/18/08 9:23:43 AM WINTER 2010 MENTORSHIP The past is history, The future is mystery, This moment is a gift – that’s why it’s called “The Present”! “Habit is habit, not to be carelessly flung out the window, but to be taken down the stairs one step at a time.” Mark Twain If you begin to channel your energy now in the direction you want to go, you will get there, a step at a time. #1: SELF-AWARENESS The first step toward improving self-esteem is to gradually begin to increase one’s level of self-awareness. A person can do this simply by noticing what’s currently happening in several areas of their experience. 1. BODY Since your body never lies, start by noticing any physical sensations related to your current situation, such as shortness of breath, tightness in your neck, shoulders, or back, butterflies in your stomach, headaches or body aches. For example, one of my clients, let’s call him Ian, notices that when work starts piling up he gets tense in the shoulders. If he doesn’t reorganize his priorities he starts to feel queasy much of the time. If he allows this pattern to continue he starts to have difficulty sleeping. However, if he can catch this pattern at its onset through self-awareness, he then has a choice. Ian can begin to choose the path of caring for and esteeming himself, and he can refrain from neglecting himself and his needs. 2. FEELINGS Next, notice any feelings you have: anxiety, sadness, panic, anger, elation. (If you’re not well-acquainted with your feelings, here’s a site with a good list: http://www. psychpage.com/learning/library/assess/feelings.html). Feelings emerge spontaneously from the body, so once WINTER 2010 you’re clued in to your body signals, you can attach some words to the sensation that describes how you’re feeling. The feeling words Ian attaches to his “tight shoulder” sensation are fear, anger, sadness, and being overwhelmed. Feelings can also be experienced as images or metaphors. Ian says that he often feels “like a tiny boat adrift in huge waves”. 3. THOUGHTS Now notice your thoughts. Thoughts are an incredibly important contributor to self-esteem or lack thereof. The good news about thoughts is that they can be controlled. You can use your will to direct your thoughts once you become more self-aware. Unfortunately, many people are unaware of the extent to which their thoughts and assumptions are influencing how they feel. We all have a running tape that plays a continuous stream of thoughts in the back of our minds. This background noise impacts how we feel, what we pay attention to, and how we behave. When Ian gets overwhelmed, he starts to think things like, “What if I can’t get this all done by Friday?” “I’m such an idiot, I should be better organized...how come other people in my office seem to get their stuff done by the end of the day?” “I’ll never figure this out...” As he becomes more selfaware, he will be able to notice these thoughts before they start to drag him down, and he can choose to substitute more helpful thoughts in their place. What kinds of tapes do you have playing in the back of your mind? I’ve found that most people with selfesteem problems tend to hold negative assumptions about themselves, and are endlessly self-critical. They’re worried about what other people think of them, and often worry about what’s going to happen next. As part of your self-awareness project, record these thoughts in a little notebook and over time you can begin to replace them with something better. 4. BEHAVIOURS Lastly, notice your behaviours. What activities are you engaged in that are doing little or nothing for you? What are you currently doing that builds you up? How’s your health? Are there people in your life that know you well - and if not, how can you begin to develop a support system? We all need some blend of positive relationships, satisfying work, and fun activities to keep our emotional tanks topped up. My client Ian notices that when he begins to feel tanked out due to stress at work he comes home and flakes out on the HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 33 MENTORSHIP couch. But when he thinks about it, he realizes that while this is relaxing, it isn’t really satisfying. Flaking out isn’t helping him develop a life that meets his needs or fulfills his values. He’s currently re-thinking these choices and making a list of activities that are both relaxing and meaningful. So far, he’s considering going to the gym, taking out a few books from the library, or calling a friend. Habits are merely thoughts and behaviors played out over time. Develop the habit of positive thoughts and helpful behaviors, and, before you know it, you will be feeling good about yourself and your life. #2: SELF-ACCEPTANCE Becoming more self-aware is an important first step on the road to self-esteem. But while you’re noticing, you also need to accept what you’re finding out about yourself. People often have a lot of trouble with this step, because their thoughts and assumptions get in the way. Assumption: It’s just as likely that I’m not the problem, as that I am. Thought: Is there something about this situation that reminds me of an anxiety-provoking situation from childhood? (i.e. something I can do a little inner work with right here and now) Or is my anxiety telling me something important about the people in this room? (some useful information I need to identify about the situation). Assumption: I can trust my own awarenesses, feelings, and abilities. Thoughts: I can trust my hunch about what is happening... what do I know about my strengths and abilities that can help me out with this situation? By identifying her assumptions and redirecting her thoughts, Gail can take herself out of the one-down position which is engendering and feeding her anxiety, and get back in touch with her strengths and capabilities. Thoughts like “What’s wrong with me?...” “I shouldn’t be feeling this way...” “Why can’t I get over this?” “It must be my fault...” stem from embedded assumptions like “I’m not worthwhile”, “My feelings don’t count”; “I have less right to take up space on planet Earth than s/he does”; “I have nothing important to contribute here”. #3: SELF-AFFIRMATION Gail is a manager in a high-tech company. Lately she’s become aware that she’s been saying things in meetings that cause her to appear stupid. Upon reflection, she’s aware that the main feeling she experiences during these meetings is anxiety. But rather than just accepting her reaction, she questions it, saying to herself, “What’s wrong with me?” “I should have had that covered.” The key concept here is INTENTIONALITY – using your will to consistently point yourself in a helpful direction. The result is predictable...by questioning her reaction, Gail becomes even more anxious than she was in the first place. There are a number of more helpful, self-accepting thoughts and assumptions Gail could be entertaining as she’s meeting with her peers. Assumption: I am a capable person who from time to time gets anxious. Resulting helpful thought: Anxiety is a natural reaction when a person feels threatened. It’s okay to feel anxious, even if it’s not fun. 34 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM A discipline is simply a habit that’s practiced intentionally on a regular basis. Self-affirmation involves disciplining oneself to be intentionally self-aware and self-accepting over a period of time. For example, Gail could choose to think helpful thoughts, instead of unhelpful ones, each time she’s in a threatening situation at work. If Gail could do this consistently, she would be practicing the discipline of self-affirmation. She would be thinking and acting from the assumption that she is a lovable and capable person, and she would be doing this even when she has made mistakes and experienced failures. Self-affirmation is not a synonym for grandiosity or selfdelusion... it doesn’t involve telling yourself you’re perfect when you’re not, or pretending you haven’t made mistakes when you have. Instead, affirming yourself through life’s difficulties involves noticing the truth, and choosing to forgive yourself when you goof up. You don’t want to let yourself off too easily – being too forgiving undermines competence and WINTER 2010 thus decreases self-esteem. But it’s important to give yourself lots of space to just be human. In addition to helpful self-talk, there are many other concrete ways to practice self-affirmation. 1. JOURNALING By taking the time to write down and consider your deepest thoughts and reflections, you are automatically affirming that you are worthwhile and important. The added side benefits of journaling are increased self-awareness and self-acceptance. Two helpful resources on journaling are The Artist’s Way, by Julia Cameron, and Write it Down, Make it Happen, by Henriette Klauser. 2. NOTES It may sound hokey, but people find it very powerful to write themselves notes. When I was in a low period during my university days, I wrote out the sentence I AM LOVEABLE AND CAPABLE in big letters and posted it on my bathroom mirror. It helped! Other people write themselves “Rainy Day Letters” just for days when they are down. I keep a file of all the thank you letters from clients, and read them when I need encouragement. 3. FUN When we’re down on ourselves, sometimes the last thing we think of doing is going out and having fun. But pleasure is tremendously self-affirming, and is often exactly what we need. 4. COMMUNITY 6. SELF-ASSESSMENT This is especially helpful form of self-affirmation during times of transition when we’re walking in circles, muttering...”Duh, who am I again?” There are lots of these available on the internet. My favorites are the MyersBriggs Personality Inventory, DISC Behavioral Inventory, and Strong Interest Inventory. Do a few of these and you will have a structured way to think about yourself and your capabilities, and will hopefully come to some new awarenesses as well. 7. CREATIVITY Putting yourself out there in the universe in any way, shape, or form helps remind you that you are worthwhile. So write a song, form a hockey team, build a boat, pen a poem, create a drawing, make some curtains – and affirm yourself at the same time. Self-awareness is the foundational stepping stone, self-acceptance starts you down the road, and selfaffirmation keeps you rolling down the highway! Practice these three disciplines, and you’ll be well on your way to greater self-confidence and selfesteem. Y Lois Raats, MEd CCC BCC www.ready2grow.com May be distributed freely, with credits and with no changes made, for any non-profit purpose. It goes without saying that the support of friends, colleagues, and family is crucial for a healthy sense of self. When your tank is empty, call a friend – but learn to support yourself through other methods when friends are not available. 5. SPIRITUAL PRACTICE Meditation, prayer, and scripture reading can help you to understand your purpose, get a sense of the “Big Picture” of your life, and keep your other problems in perspective. WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 35 MENTORSHIP Lisa Caldas Kappesser EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE IS BECOMING MORE IMPORTANT TO EMPLOYERS 36 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM WINTER 2010 M In today’s economy, it’s not always the most qualified candidate who lands the job. Employers are increasingly opting to hire people who exude high emotional intelligence over those who possess the most experience, says Lisa Caldas Kappesser, author of the new book The Smart New Way to Get Hired: Use Emotional Intelligence and Land the Right Job. Kappesser describes emotional intelligence as a group of four skill sets or competencies that, when used together effectively, can help people achieve their goals, including landing a new job. These four skill sets include: selfawareness, self-management, social awareness and social skills. According to Kappesser, people utilizing these skill sets have a big advantage in the job hunt and in their careers. “Employers look for emotional intelligence when they hire or promote employees. They’re developing structured interview questions and giving assessments that tap into emotional intelligence, because research has convinced them that such intelligence is a critical part of developing high potentials, star performers and leaders.” Throughout her book, Kappesser provides tips for developing emotional intelligence and maximizing it to become a standout candidate in the job hunt. This advice includes the following EQ (short for emotional intelligence) techniques to help candidates excel during interviews: • Focus on three main points. Pick three points or messages that should be highlighted throughout your overall interview performance. Plan how you will get these points across through your answers to interview questions. • Research what the company needs and share how you meet those needs. Employers admire candidates who show genuine interest in their company by being knowledgeable. WINTER 2010 MENTORSHIP • • Know your brand. You distinguish yourself from others by branding yourself and showing what makes you unique or different. Ask yourself how you want others to think of you and remember you when you leave the interview. Create a good communication flow. Keep your answers short, clear and to the point. Let the interviewer ask for more detail about any information you share. When you don’t fully understand a question, ask for clarification. This shows good listening and communication skills. • Smile and show a sense of humor. This helps create a positive connection with the interviewer which can give you the edge over other qualified candidates. Y More tips and information about how emotional intelligence impacts a person’s success can be found in The Smart New Way to Get Hired. It is available at Amazon.com, in all major bookstores and from the publisher (www.jist.com or 1.800.648.JIST). The author, Lisa Caldas Kappesser, is president of EQ Coaching Solutions, where she provides quality career and executive coaching services and educates organizations on the importance of emotional intelligence in career success. She has a M.A. from the University of Notre Dame, and is a certified career coach through The College of Executive Coaching. To schedule an interview with her or to request a copy of her book, contact Selena Dehne. JIST, America’s Career Publisher, is a division of EMC/ Paradigm Publishing. As the leading publisher of job search, career and occupational information, JIST empowers today’s workforce and students to achieve long-lasting rewards in their careers. HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 37 MENTORSHIP HEART JOURNAL EXERCISE “Where your pleasure is, there is your treasure; where your treasure, there your heart; where your heart, there is your happiness”. St. Augustine In this issue, we ask you to think about Gratitude – to put you in a positive mental framework. Take time to reflect on your life. If that is too overwhelming, just focus on 2010. What are some of the key accomplishments this past year? What growth milestones have you achieved and who has been instrumental in helping you achieve your goals? Give yourself permission to congratulate yourself; to give yourself a pat on the back for all that you have achieved, survived, accomplished and dared to dream about. We tend to focus or obsess over our perceived failures or life challenges, forgetting all the wonderful accomplishments that also colour our journey. One only has to reflect on 2010 to feel gratitude for all that we have. Our Canadian Olympic athletes took us to heights unimagined with grace and excellence. The Chilean miner’s mental endurance and positivity has inspired the world, not to mention the unification of the many countries that collaborated to engineered their safe rescue. The spirit and strength of the Haitian people after yet another catastrophe. Or a look toward our American neighbours, who have lost their homes and jobs in the aftermath of the economic crisis. And the Canadian men and women fighting to protect and secure our freedom and safety, many of whom will never return to their families or their peaceful life again. When you step back and consider all that has happened in 2010, we all have so many reasons to be grateful. When you come from a place of gratitude, you are open to so many possibilities. It is hard not to let the smile lift your lips and cheeks into that wonderful pose , releasing positive endorphins in your brain that seem to make their way to your toes. So, as you reflect on 2010 and start planning for 2011, start by listing all the things you are grateful for. Don’t be modest; be generous to yourself and make sure you acknowledge all your achievements and small jesters (like paying for someone’s coffee at the drive thru, taking that painting class you’ve always wanted or closing that deal you have been working on for months). Focus on your commitment to growth, on your ability to dream and to make your dreams reality. Focus on living today; crossing off items on your ‘bucket list’ now! It’s only too late if you don’t start now, so smile and get started! 38 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM WINTER 2010 Journal MENTORSHIP READY FOR A FRESH START IN 2011? 1. List at least 3 key accomplishments in 2010 – what are you most proud of? 2. What new ‘truth’ did you discover about yourself in 2010? 3. List at least 3 people or factors that you are most grateful for? 4. What were the greatest lesson(s) in 2010? 5. How will those lessons impact your future behaviour/attitude? 6. What event in 2010 shaped or redefined your life goals? 7. Do you feel you are living authentically? How can you strengthen this area? 8. When was the last time you laughed so hard your stomach ached? 9. When was the last time you treated yourself to a ‘me day’? If you haven’t taken one, why? 10. When you think about starting the new year, how does that make you feel? Why? 11. List 5 career goals for 2011. 12. List 3 dream or ‘bucket list’ activities that you will make happen in 2011. 13. If you have been putting off living your dream life list the top 5 reasons for your delay. a. Now, list 3 action items that will help you achieve your goals. 14. Make a list of those who can help you achieve your goals and for whom you are grateful for. Date and sign this journal entry: Completed on: I pledge to revisit my goals on: (must be within 3 months) I pledge to follow-up and to make my dreams and goals a priority: (your signature) WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 39 MENTORSHIP Darcey-Lynn Marc I MYERS BRIGGS TYPE INDICATOR AS A STRATEGIC BUSINESS RESOURCE If you have never considered the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) as a powerful addition to your strategic planning process, you are likely missing an opportunity to boost the depth and breadth of your discussions. One of the cornerstones of effective strategic planning is communication. The ability and willingness to gather information, share insights, challenge ideas and opinions and distill a focused and meaningful direction for an organization. This is no easy task in a world that is increasingly diverse and complex. The members of leadership teams and governing bodies are made of diverse individuals with various experiences, skills, paradigms and preferences. These unique characteristics bring value to the discussion. They also serve as filters of information and shape how information is shared and discussed. Some of the pitfalls that even experienced and skilled groups fall into include the following: 40 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM • • • • • • • • • • Discounting an idea that seems too outside the box Some individuals seeming to dominate the discussion, always having an opinion on any point that is raised Others who do not share any information until near the very end of the discussion Some wanting only practical, proven strategies that move the organization forward incrementally while others are looking for expansive change with the debate ending in a stalemate Frustration between members who are ‘over prepared” versus those that seem to just show up and dive into the discussion Discussions that seem to jump from one idea to the next with no destination ever arrived at A process that is prescribed, followed with no room for deviation Some wanting volumes of data and information in order to move forward Others who seem to make decisions based on little or no information at all Some hearing information in a very literal way while the presenter is speaking in a more figurative way sometimes leading to a mismatch in understanding WINTER 2010 MENTORSHIP The MBTI is a powerful starting point for strategic discussions. By alerting the group members to their natural style regarding information gathering, analyzing, decision making and need for conclusion versus a more open ended approach, experiences that might seem to be rooted in conflict are better recognized as simply being differences. Once individuals understand and can recognize what is different, a transformation in the discussion often occurs. Dialogue emerges rather than positional debate. The focus becomes on the topic rather than on the people. The facilitator of the strategic planning process is also better able to alert the group to any situations where the natural type is helping or hindering the discussion. By introducing the MBTI as an opening strategy in the process, the group also learns about the profile of the group, alerting them to any natural biases or pitfalls to watch out for. (if the entire group is predominantly iNtuitive, they may risk setting direction with insufficient evidence for the direction; in contrast, a group that is predominantly Sensing might get bogged down in searching for enough data to have confidence in the direction they are contemplating). The MBTI also serves as a natural team building experience often creating a stronger sense of group. This is particularly valuable for governing bodies who may only come together 4 to 6 times a year so have less time to form as a high performing team yet have substantial influence over the direction of an organization. It provides individuals with a common language to challenge ideas and approaches taken by others. (“do we really need that much evidence to move forward or is it just our natural preference to gather this evidence” or, “ are we making too big a leap here because it feels so energizing to our natural way of doing something?”). This is true for the strategic planning discussion but also in future meetings. Being aware of the type profile of the group also supports effective preparation of pre-meeting materials, ensuring that the information needs of all preferences are met rather than just a select group. This promotes all members of the group being able to appear equally prepared and encouraged to participate at the meeting. the organization spent countless hours in meetings to improve processes, information and products for this very client? How could the client not know how important they were…”we were spending thousands of hours and dollars to improve for them”. Well, when the INTP organization discovered their client organization was operating as an ESFJ organization, many light bulbs went on. The client wanted to build a relationship, be involved and participate in the changes and wanted things done sooner than later. What the client experienced was no contact… because the service provider was trying to “make things perfect and then showcase them to the client”. By using the MBTI as part of the SWOT analysis, the organization was able to adjust their approach in working with this client and built a stronger relationship, keeping them as a client. If you are interested in using the MBTI as part of your strategic planning process, you will need to involve someone who is qualified to administer and debrief the MBTI. The questionnaire provides a comprehensive individual report. Another report that I have used that groups have found very helpful is the MBTI Team Report. This creates a team profile illustrating where the strengths and blind spots are for that particular team. This is an insightful start to a planning process. TIPS TO PLANNING A “TYPE-FRIENDLY” MEETING To support all type preferences and maximize the natural contribution of type in meetings, the following tips will promote a “total type friendly” meeting: PREPARATION • Circulate an agenda in advance to support individuals who prefer to think through their contribution in advance; this helps them be “ready to contribute” at the beginning of the meeting Provide specifics in the agenda; include details about outcomes and preparation required; for each agenda item, where possible, include enough detail so participants know what to expect The MBTI is also a powerful resource when conducting a SWOT analysis. Identifying the type profile of the organization and comparing this to other stakeholder groups or customer organizations is invaluable in identifying goals and strategies to build stronger relationships. • One organization was struggling to understand why their client organization was continually frustrated with them and were sending signals that they were going to look elsewhere for a service provider. How could this be when • WINTER 2010 Let people know about start and finish time; be prepared to stick to these or let individuals know upfront if the times listed are just “best guesstimates” HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 41 MENTORSHIP Support different preparation styles; some individuals will naturally prepare well in advance of the meeting and others will naturally prepare just before the meeting begins; both type preferences might be equally valuable contributors but the diversity in their preparation strategies might lead to assumptions being made about who is more “engaged and interested”. Be cautious as this might simply reflect a different process in preparing rather than who is more interested and supportive. • MEETING DYNAMICS • Maximize different processing styles; recognize that some people naturally process information at a subconscious level; this creates a very rapid processing of information; others naturally process information at a conscious level; this is a naturally slower process • • - Provide opportunities for individuals to digest new information before moving on, particularly for critical topics. This might simply mean providing a few minutes for each person to review data and identify their questions and concerns; or asking people to discuss/evaluation the topic with someone sitting next to them before coming back to large group discussion. - If possible, relate the new information to something that has been successful or similar in the past. Be change conscious; for topics that are introducing significant change, some individuals will naturally “accept the possibility of the change” and jump on board quite quickly, even with little supporting evidence; others will expect and demand more thorough data and proof before agreeing to or supporting the direction. - Ensure that there is sufficient evidence/data available to individuals in advance of the meeting or during the meeting to best support this natural process. • Ensure that groups who might be faster to jump to conclusions consider sufficient information. • 42 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM Work with the group at the beginning of the meeting to determine “meeting norms” to deal with situations where there appears to be a stalemate over lack of data; Provide data where possible; sometimes for new endeavors, it will be a leap of faith; help people understand the degree of proof that will or will not be available and why; ensure individuals are aware of the risk of moving forward or not. • Maintain a “group record” that is visible. The use of flipcharts to track key decisions, questions raised or important information can be invaluable to support type preferences that naturally get energized by repeating information that has already been raised. The visibility of what has been discussed reduces the sense of need to raise the same point over and over again. Provide a parking lot and post its for each meeting participant; individuals with a natural extraversion tend to “think out loud” and can be experienced as interrupting. By providing them with post its to record their thoughts, this ensures their need to “think out loud” is supported but done in a way that supports dialogue among all meeting participants • Provide regular thinking breaks; for some natural types, there is a strong preference to not share information until their thoughts are fully formed and thought through. Providing a 5 minute “think break” prior to final discussion and decision can support this preference in feeling more “ready” to contribute to the important discussion • DECISION MAKING • Be aware of natural blind spots; if and when individuals stick to their natural type in decision-making, blind spots can be created. Provide the group with a list of questions to consider as decisions are being made. The questions should reflect perspectives from Sensing, iNtuition, Thinking and Feeling. During the discussion or just prior to making the decision, ask participants to scan the list and see if there are any outstanding questions to WINTER 2010 MENTORSHIP consider. Examples of questions include the following: - What do we know; how do we know it (Sensing) - What else can we come up with? (iNtuition) - What are the logical consequences of this decision? (Thinking) - What do we like and dislike? (Feeling) Watch for early or late closing; natural type preferences can lead individuals to feel more or less energized about bringing the discussion to a conclusion and making a decision. - If the group you are working with are predominantly Judging in their preference, they would naturally move to a conclusion sooner than later. It will be important for this group to assess whether sufficient information has been gathered and if there is a risk in moving to a decision at this time. - If the group is more predominantly Perceiving, their natural tendency would be to avoid making a decision or bringing discussions to conclusion as “there could be just one more vital piece of information to consider”. So for this group it will be important to consider the risk in not making the decision and moving on. • All type preferences make a powerful contribution to meetings and to a decision making process. Groups that understand type and the influence it has on group dynamics and decision making are better able to tap into all types to promote a more well rounded discussion and decisions. Each person is capable of tapping into both their preferred type and their less preferred type. By offering some guidance and structure to promote consideration from an all type perspective, outcomes and levels of satisfaction can improve. WHAT IS THE MYERS-BRIGGS TYPE INDICATOR®? The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® (MBTI®) is a short, selfreport questionnaire used to measure and describe people’s preferences for how they like to get information, make decisions and orient their lives. Created by a mother-daughter team, Katherine Briggs and Isabel Myers, the MBTI® instrument was designed to make Carl Jung’s theory of psychological types understandable and useful in everyday life. MBTI is a resource to help individuals explore and discover WINTER 2010 their natural type preference. All type preferences are equal in value; there are no “better or worse” types. Importantly all type preferences are available to use in our daily living. We naturally gravitate to some (our natural preferences) while for other preferences we have to make a more conscious effort to tap into and use them. After more than 50 years of research and development, the current MBTI® tool is the most widely used instrument for understanding individual personality differences. Last year alone, over two million people gained valuable insight about themselves and the people they interact with by taking the MBTI® instrument. The MBTI® instrument provides a versatile measure of personality that looks at eight personality preferences people use at different times. These eight preferences are organized into four, dichotomous scales, which are illustrated below. FOCUS OF ATTENTION • Extraversion - Energized by people and things in the external world. • Introversion - Energized by ideas or impressions in the inner world. INFORMATION INPUT • Sensing - Gather details and facts that can be confirmed by experience. • Intuition - Gather ideas and see future possibilities. DECISION MAKING • Thinking - Make decisions by logic and analysis. • Feeling - Make decisions based on personal values. LIFESTYLE • Judging - Enjoy planning and deciding. • Perceiving - Enjoy remaining open to new options.Y Darcey-Lynn Marc brings over 29 years of experience in leadership and organizational development to her consultation services and sessions. Darcey-Lynn has a BSc. Specialization in Psychology and is looking forward to completing a previously started Masters in Business. She is also certified in a number of programs including Achieve International, MBTI and MBTI Step II. A member of the CMC To reach Darcey-Lynn Marc contact: Marc & Associates Incorporated 9744-101 Street Edmonton, Alberta, Canada T5K 0W8 Phone: 780 421-7714 Fax: 780 425-1092 - [email protected] HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 43 MENTORSHIP Lynne Hussey It’s also an amazing story of leadership: not one super hero, but a leader, the shift supervisor, Luis Urzua, around whom other leaders emerged. We ask ourselves, could I have been that leader? Among a group of workers in a life and death situation, would I have had what it takes to lead my team to eventual freedom? While a corporate crisis is not the same as a mining disaster, there are universal leadership principles at play whenever we have to face down obstacles or move through challenges. Any obstacles, any challenges. Do we as women in business have what it takes when the crunch comes? A study of women leaders (The Qualities That Distinguish Women Leaders, www.calipercanada.com/en/brochures/ WomenLeaderWhitePaper.pdf has been conducted by Caliper, a global consulting firm. In it, the group of 60 leaders from top companies in the U.S. and U.K. who were interviewed and surveyed highlighted the significance of overcoming adversity in their careers. Comparing the women to men in comparable jobs, the study shows us women’s distinct strengths as leaders. COULD YOU DO WHAT THEY DID? The miners’ rescue raised the question. A Caliper study of women leaders offers a surprising answer. T The story of the Chilean miners, successfully rescued after 70 days trapped 700 m underground made us all wonder what it would be like to be in the situation ourselves. How would we cope with the stress, the fear of death, the endless waiting, the terrible heat and humidity? We ask ourselves: would we break down and go under, or would we have been strong enough to get through the ordeal and come out in good condition? 44 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM So let’s see how the results measure up against Urzua’s leadership: LUIS URZUA, SHIFT SUPERVISOR: Although only two months on the job in this mine, he had a reputation for loving and caring for his men. Amid fights and split ups in the dark days before they were discovered, he saved the group’s lives by persuading everyone to share food equally. That meant eating bottle cap-sized bits of tuna every other day to make three days of food last two weeks. WOMEN LEADERS BASED ON THE CALIPER STUDY: Women tend to be highly persuasive rather than directive because they are able to read situations accurately and take in information from all sides. And they listen, really listen. The result is that they can come at a subject from the others’ perspective, and people they are leading feel more understood, supported and valued. What makes women do this? It’s because they tend to genuinely understand and care about where others are coming from. WINTER 2010 MENTORSHIP URZUA: He organized the miners into teams -- then other leaders emerged who took care of the group’s medical, spiritual, and technical needs. Urzua divided the group into 3 teams working 8 hour shifts, with every member having a job. The spiritual leader suggested making a further 11 teams to provide a 3-man buddy system, and the group put that idea into action as well. WOMEN LEADERS: Women have a strong tendency to use a team building leadership style. “We strengthen ourselves through strengthening others,” is how one of the study’s participants summed up the predominant attitude of women leaders. They solicit others’ ideas and tend to use them in their solutions. URZUA: In the early, desperate days before the rescue operation began, Urzua, a man of few words, encouraged the men constantly. He didn’t sugarcoat the truth, but urged them to find strength. Above all, he had a sense of purpose, not just the will to live but the will to love, to reach the families that were waiting for them. WOMEN LEADERS: They tend to be passionate and have a sense of mission about what they are doing. At the same time, in a series in the Globe and Mail (Women in Power), Hydro One CEO Laura Formusa said her love of the company was key to her staying and rising to a position of leadership. URZUA: He spoke with rescuers, reporting on the situation and receiving three briefings a day about the miners’ medical condition and the rescue operation. But at one point, he became impatient with the psychologist. “Let’s keep it short,” he said, “we have work to do down here.” WOMEN LEADERS: Women leaders are more likely to push back if they are overly bound by regulations and rules. They tend to feel more urgency to get things done than male leaders and are less likely to hesitate or focus on the small details. They engage in more risk taking and come up with innovative solutions. Women will run the risk of occasionally being wrong or breaking the rules in order to get things done. And with their fine abstract reasoning skills, they will learn from any mistakes and carry on. WINTER 2010 URZUA: He experienced moments of doubt when no rescue was in sight, but he somehow had faith. He said, “We had strength, spirit, we wanted to fight [to survive].” WOMEN LEADERS: The women in the Caliper study candidly shared stories of failures and obstacles. They admitted they were often hard on themselves at first, but showed a lot of determination to bounce back. If others thought they couldn’t do it, that motivated them to show the world they could. And as Sandra Dawe, managing partner of Shibley Righton LLP, said in Lawyers’ Weekly, “Women are more likely to take chances now, pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and move forward.” Luis Urzua showed he could lead a group that stands as a brilliant example of teamwork. After all, the inclusive team building leadership style that comes naturally to women would have worked pretty well down in the mine. We may all be better in a crunch than we know, especially when it comes to leading our group out of a tough spot. Y Even more than men, women leaders naturally tend to have: PERSUASIVE MOTIVATION WILLINGNESS TO RISK URGENCY SOCIABILITY ASSERTIVENESS EMPATHY FLEXIBILITY Lynne Hussey is a Toronto writer specializing in workplace issues. She is currently an editorial staff member of Caliper Canada, http://www.calipercanada.com/en/contact.asp. Caliper is a global consulting firm that has been helping hire and build outstanding teams and develop organizations for more than 40 years. Email Lynne at [email protected] HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 45 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT Tanis Helliwell “When one door of opportunity closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” Helen Keller SEEKING THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL Everywhere I go people speak of the stress they are experiencing. This stress has intensified this year because of the unsettled world situation politically, economically, and most important environmentally. These situations have created a great deal of fear and, when fear rises, joy declines. There is a kind of heaviness of spirit in the atmosphere that weighs people down. This means that people are no longer enjoying the beauties that life holds for them. Perhaps we cannot control what happens in Pakistan, or to the stock market, or if our work is currently in demand or not. But we are far from powerless. We have the choice each day about how we react to difficult situations and we can choose an attitude of peace, love and gratitude that nurtures our soul and the soul of others. But how do we lighten up enough to embrace these higher emotions? REEXAMINE ALL YOU HAVE BEEN TAUGHT TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE & WORK LIGHTENING UP 46 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM Walt Whitman once wrote “Re-examine all you have been taught; dismiss what insults your soul and your very flesh will become a great poem.” We can no longer look to leaders out there to solve our problems, and to give us codes to live; we need to do this ourselves. Exercise: Is there any work or people that insult your soul that you feel ready to let go of in your life? WINTER 2010 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT ARE YOUR FORMER GOALS STILL APPROPRIATE? From time to time, we need to see if the soul goals we have been working on still apply. Goals change as we do and what makes us happy at 20 may no longer at 40. If we are relatively happy with our lives, and feel that our goals are more or less in keeping with our lives purpose, we need only make small corrections. Sometimes, however, radical adjustments are necessary .For instance, we might feel that we have achieved the goals we set and now need new ones. Or we might not have had such a positive experience. Rather than feel that we have actively chosen our life paths, we feel like victims. We accepted— without critical thought—what our parents or culture told us would make us happy and led that life. Perhaps, we chose a career for money and not for love. If this has happened, we may experience a deep depression in middle age when we realize that our chosen work is without soul and meaning. What follows is predictably a great deal of pain as we attempt to realign with the soul’s purpose. Exercise: Are the goals you have pursuing this year still meeting your needs or are there some you need to eliminate and others you need to add? RETREATS TO REFOCUS AND RECHARGE YOUR ENERGY During both scenarios, we need retreat time. Retreats could be time spent be ourselves at a cottage where we meditate, write in our journal and walk in nature. It could also be taking part in an organized retreat lasting from one week to several months. Another option is to spend time with our family and close friends to rediscover ourselves and to grow together with people we love. Some of us might need only a small adjustment to our life paths to bring more soul into our personal and professional lives. We might feel that we are relatively on track but that we are too busy, doing too much and need to take time to reassess our priorities. WINTER 2010 Others of us might be experiencing a soul sickness, which is accompanied by varying degrees of anger, guilt, despair and continual anxiety. The solution to our “dis-ease” may elude us. We know what makes us unhappy, but may not be able to determine what would make us happy. We may hesitate to give up the security of our present situation for the unknown and stay even when we are miserable. We feel trapped and victimized, which adds to our despair. Our despair can have a serious effect on those around us and may lead to strained relationships and even their termination. Exercise: Is it important for you to have a retreat currently? If so, what time are you prepared to commit? Even if you can only devote a half hour a day to meditating this is a mini-retreat. LETTING GO AND LIGHTENING UP During this process we need time out to create a space for a new thought to enter. We must empty ourselves of the old in order to birth our new life purpose. We must detach ourselves from old patterns of stability and willingly enter the chaos of uncertainty from which a new soul direction will ultimately arise. We cannot set a time for how long this entire process will take. It depends on how long it takes to release our old patterns. By engaging in this journey of discovery we find a new purpose for our life and rediscover joy. Y Tanis Helliwell is the founder of The International Institute for Transformation, which assists individuals to live and work with meaning and purpose. She is the author of the best-selling book Take Your Soul to Work and a new book called Embraced by Love. To celebrate we offer Take Your Soul to Work to all readers for only $10 (retails for $21.95) plus GST and postage. Contact www.iitransform.com or call (403) 241-0933 in Calgary for details. HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 47 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT Taylor Williams E Chasing the ELUSIVE State of Consciousness Eight years ago, my son Alex and I were engaged in a deep ‘what do you want to do when you grow up’ conversation. As the conversation unfolded, Alex asked me a question which became one of my wake-up calls. My son asked if I was now doing what I’d always wanted to do with my life. While I stammered through an appropriate and justified response, I ultimately did respond with the truth that ‘no I was not, and that would begin to change right now’. 48 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM That moment with Alex deepened my resolve to role model a life that was possible for him versus telling him. I realized that as a parent, I could only give away what I myself had. Rather than use words to ignite the potential of my child or discuss a higher source that he could connect to for wisdom, I had to become a fully conscious being; the ultimate role model to his observing eyes. I would like to say that at that moment, everything changed WINTER 2010 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT and I quickly went on to live the life of my dreams, connected to my Soul and attain my fullest capacity for consciousness, but I did not. I did however point my head and heels down with a shift in perspective. My son, in that moment, and to this day , remains my catalyst for some of the most profound and transformative personal changes that I’ve been able to make. My life has been riddled with mistakes, harm caused to others, living selfishly and so forth...but I have finally come to understand that we really are all designed with a capacity for consciousness; including me. Life has been a process of learning who I was not, in order to know who I am. To allow love and acceptance for every aspect of myself is the journey; not attaching the definition of my Self to any labels, roles or titles. I have tried religion, non-religion and new-age; each with outrageous stories to accompany those experiences. I have read many of the books from the ‘great spiritual teachers’ that so many of us follow and admire. There has also been an extraordinary amount of time and money dedicated towards therapy, counselling, personal development, recovery programs and spiritual growth courses; add to my spiritual development repertoire, is an admirable list of courses, workshops and counselling on understanding how to meet my son where he is versus pulling him to where I was. Despite my efforts, I continued to have, the emotional rollercoaster engage once again. It seemed that despite my hard work and sincere efforts, I was just destined to live with fleeting moments of peace. My experience of life has begun to change as a result of a profound and sacred process that I was introduced to only 3 short months ago. I finally know that the tumultuous ride I have been on is coming to an end, giving way to a re-birth of myself and forever changing my experience of life right down to the roots. The process was created by Jonathan Davies and grounded by his wife Hazel. After a lifetime of spiritual study, Jonathan was given a blessing which he is now able to offer to others who ask. This is his life work, a heart to heart transfer of a completed energetic space which accelerates an individual’s journey to consciousness. When Jonathan and Hazel explained the nature of their work, the Unity Bubble, it sounded WAY TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. I was checking internally for red flags and found none. There was a deep level of compassion, humility and wisdom in their tone, way of being and presence. In July 2010 I received my own Unity Bubble WINTER 2010 which, I was told would continue to evolve and unfold throughout my lifetime. The initial stages are a clearing of all unresolved issues, unhealed wounds and any lingering blockages interfering with my capacity for consciousness. At the beginning, many challenges bubbled up to the surface but I understood that inside my bubble at this time, they were arising for the last time once I dove right into the heart of each issue...where the truth resides. Every step of the way, as each issued appeared in rapid fire succession, I engaged in the process as an observer of the challenge versus an experience. Each time an uncomfortable feeling or situation showed up, rather than seeing the ‘same ole same ole’, I took the perspective of ‘appearing for the last time’ and would ask ‘it’ the question “Why would this situation, pattern or feeling be appearing now...what can I learn, what have I misunderstood in the past about myself in relation to this?” This has been a profound experience of becoming more and more intimately familiar with who I am underneath all the titles, roles, relationships or possessions I have; an experience that is extremely difficult for me to describe. This journey all began with my knowing about myself and life that “This isn’t it, I don’t know what is...but I am going out looking for it”! I have taken rests along the way to reflect, absorb and process; as I continue to do within the completion of my initial 3 months – the clearing period. As I have just completed my ‘clearing and releasing’ phase of this journey, I feel as though I have grown from a 42 year old little girl into a powerful, more aware woman. I can sense the shift that is occurring in and around me. The clarity which comes in response to my internal questions still stuns me. The power of manifestation is compounding and I am really quite amazed at how one week I will identify a skill or thing that I need, one week later at the most, the person or resource shows up who offers precisely what I ‘called out for’. I am told that the next stage of my journey will be an unfolding and rebirth of Taylor, now developing from a clean and pure space of intention and choice. Y This article is an excerpt from Taylor Williams current work in progress and soon to be published The Elusive State of Consciousness. Stay tuned for publication dates and details or follow Taylor’s journey – visit The www.unitybubble.com website to get more info and also to find the contact info for ‘The Bubble People’ – Jonathan & Hazel. HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 49 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT Journal READY FOR A FRESH START IN 2011? A. Engaging in an honest self - appraisal, ask yourself the following question and notice the feelings which come up in response. Note in your journal the immediate thoughts and how you felt when you read the question. Are you now, currently being the role model in your life, which small YOU as a 3 year, old would look up to? B. Sit back, relax and engage in a scan through all areas of your life, through perceiving images, seeing pictures or noticing feelings in response to areas of your life. Pay attention to where you seem to get or ‘feel’ stuck in the energy of an emotion, area or situation...stay with it and write about that experience. C. Based on where you were ‘stuck’ from the question above, consider that that may be the one or two areas which are closest to the surface, readily available for your access to begin delayering and clearing. Ask yourself and write your thoughts, feelings or emotions in response to “What is the seed of truth or wisdom buried within this situation which I may have missed in the past?” **If you keep coming up with more questions, versus clarity that is just fine – follow the golden thread of your questions. You will discover a nugget of gold truth, if you are willing to discover where this line of questioning leads. D. Now ask yourself, in response to what you discovered through the preceding question: “Am I now ready and willing completely release this from my experience & memories going back to the first inception?” If your answer was yes – go through which ever actions or process which seem right to you for releasing something. If the answer was no, ask yourself “If not now, when will I be ready and willing?” and be okay with whatever your answer is; self love and acceptance is key here regardless of your answer. 50 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM WINTER 2010 It's time. You can own, ride and enjoy a Harley-Davidson® motorcycle. Independence and fun that's all in one package. With a variety of models that can accommodate every woman that wants to ride the road to freedom. You want to put a smile on the faces of your friends? Pull up on a Harley. You want to put a smile on your face? Ride one. Visit an authorized Harley-Davidson® Retailer today or go to www.harleycanada.com. It's time. Get in the rider's seat. With the purchase of any new Harley-Davidson® model from an authorized Canadian Harley-Davidson® Retailer, you will receive a free, full one-year membership in H.O.G.® We support the Canada Safety Council Rider Training Program. Always ride with a helmet. Ride defensively. Distributed exclusively in Canada by Deeley Harley-Davidson® Canada, Richmond and Concord. Deeley Harley-Davidson® Canada is a proud sponsor of Muscular Dystrophy Canada. ©2008 H-D. WINTER 2010 www.harleycanada.com HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 51 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT Dorothy Ratusny M My approach to life (which inherently shows up in my work as a Psychotherapist, Life Coach and Author) is ‘forward-minded’. I ascribe to the notion that standing still (metaphorically speaking) means I am not moving forward and I need to move forward in order to create, inspire, live, enjoy and become ‘more’. ‘More’ in this case means: evolving, growing, learning and changing in order to become a better (human and spiritual) being. I am also a big believer in ‘walking the talk’ – I can’t expect clients and others to practice the core values I suggest and share if I don’t. This certainly doesn’t mean that I am perfect but rather that I too am walking gratefully in my own journey. At the same time I promote and recognize growth and change, I am very aware of the incredible lightness that comes from being grateful and content with what ‘is’ and joyful in ‘present moment awareness’. In order to facilitate positive change, it’s imperative that you know what you want. Reflecting “forward” means paying close attention to where you currently are in a way that also highlights for you what you’ve accomplished to date. So many people consider action as movement in some way. Fewer people realize that before you move in any direction, some thought, reflection, and planning deserves to go into guiding you. Your forward action also needs to be based on what is most important and valuable to you. GROWTH CHANGE GRATITUDE 52 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM With having a clear plan and a clear path before you, you can refer to your ideals, your goals, and the steps you need to take to achieve these goals. It may seem like a lot of work, but it’s truly what makes the difference between actualizing all of what you really want and just dreaming about it. One highly effective tool that I have used in past workshops and retreats continues to cultivate incredible insight and awareness. I share it here with you and urge you to invest the time to complete all of the steps for its full impact and learning effect. CLARIFYING YOUR VALUES Knowing what is most valuable to you gives you forward direction in life. You can focus the majority of your time and energy on these values, rather than on things that are less important to you. When you have to choose between alternatives, you can look to your highest priorities to help you make your decision. WINTER 2010 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT I) Identifying Your Highest Ideals *Values are ideals. They are the things, experiences, qualities, and principles that you would most like to have in your life. 1. 2. Close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and relax. Imagine yourself in a favourite place where you can take a few minutes to think. The time is many years from now. You have lived a long and full life. Reflect upon your life from this mature vantage point. What did you most enjoy experiencing and doing? What did you most appreciate accomplishing or having? Write your answers on a piece of paper or in your journal. Return to your relaxed position and imagine yourself again in your favourite place. This time, you are still your current age. You have just learned that you have a rare illness that has no symptoms but will kill you in six months. Given only half a year to live, what do you want to experience, do, accomplish, and have? Write your answers in a separate place in your journal or on a different piece of paper. Compare your two sets of answers. Are they the same or different? Most people actually faced with a lifethreatening illness find that their priorities change. Things once thought to be crucial seem less important, and things once overlooked take on new meaning. II) Order your Values Take the list that you have developed and order your values from the most to the least important for you. III) Set Goals * Goals are real and specific. Goals are objectives that you want to achieve, given the constraints of your time and other resources. To bring your life into closer alignment with what you consider most worthwhile, create short (>1yr) , medium (2-3 yrs), and long-term (5 years+) goals for each of your values. Some guidelines for setting effective goals: 1. 2. 3. Is this a goal that you really want to devote a lot of time and energy to accomplish? Or is it simply a dream of what you would like to have fall in your lap, but are not willing to work for? Is this goal consistent with your highest values? One reason that you may not accomplish a goal is because it does not fit in with what is most important to you. Is this goal achievable? Is it specific enough so that you will know when you have achieved it? Is it WINTER 2010 4. 5. achievable within a time frame that you can set for yourself? (Realize that some goals will take longer than you think but as long as you keep working on them, they will materialize). Do you have access to the resources necessary to achieve it? Is this goal positive? You are more likely to achieve goals that you are moving toward rather than away from. Are your goals in balance? Do most of your goals involve career and finances, while almost none of them have to do with health, relationships, and fun? Lack of balance is a major source of unhappiness and stress. IV) Create Action Steps Identify the specific steps that you need to take in order to achieve each of your goals. The most common reason that people do not attain their objectives is that they do not have an action plan that describes step by step how they are going to get from where they are now all the way to their goal. An effective action plan includes: • A well thought out and specific goal • A description of all the resources that you will need and how you will access them. • Each step you must take in the correct order • How you will monitor your progress including how you will deal with procrastination • What rewards you will put in place along the way to motivate and gratify your success I invite you to re-evaluate your ideals at least yearly. Sometimes, as we change our highest ideals may indeed change as well. Most important is staying true to yourself and to what is most important or valuable at any time in your life. Together with acknowledging your progress and being grateful for your accomplishments – keep your eyes clearly on your path, your road and not on the paths of others for their journey is indeed going to be different – and not necessarily best for you. Y *Journal exercise in part adapted from: The Relaxation & Stress Reduction Workbook: Sixth Edition by Martha Davis PhD, Elizabeth Robbins Eshelman MSW, and Matthew McKay PhD (Paperback - Apr 15 2008) Dorothy Ratusny is a Certified Psychotherapist and Life Coach in private practice in Toronto, Canada. She works with teens, adults and couples in addition to facilitating workshop trainings and holistic retreats. Dorothy is the author of The Purpose of Love: A Guidebook for defining and cultivating your most significant relationship (Insomniac Press, September 2007), Live Your Life’s Purpose: A Guidebook for Creating and Living a Purposeful Life (Insomniac Press, October 2008) and INSPIRATION & WISDOM: A JOURNAL (December 2010). For more information about the Author please visit her website at: www.dorothyratusny.com. HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 53 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT Judy Bradt Karen always seems to be able to find a parking space. By the time the perfect spot appears just where she needs one, I have a feeling she’s already imagined it and given thanks. Call it what you like – parking karma, the power of positive intention, the value of visualization – it’s just part of the way she moves through the world. For my part, I didn’t always love writing thank-you notes. But somewhere along the way, I noticed that I always smiled while I wrote them, remembering my friend’s kind word or thoughtful gesture (or massive generosity). That’s an easy kind of gratitude -- for something obviously nice, given and received and acknowledge. Those short notes are not merely the province of the elite: they are a way that each of us can bring simple grace into a world that is hungry for joy. L ON GRATITUDE Let me begin by saying I’m grateful for my mom. She…worries. And the world always gives her lots to work with! She worries about all four of her kids. She worries about her five grandkids. She worries about hurricanes out in the Atlantic. It used to make me crazy, but I’ve recently become grateful for the deeper gift that the worrying disguises, which she’s passed along to all her kids: the rock-solid survivor skills that her father gave her. My grandfather Karl Krawiecki immigrated to Canada and never stopped reinventing himself and taking up entirely new careers when times got tough or the economy shifted. And so no matter how I feel about the challenge I’m facing, I always eventually remember that I’ve got it in me to figure it out and move on, one way or another! I’m a great believer in gratitude – and I find the more I give thanks, the more I find to be grateful for. I can’t say I’ve mastered the art of the grateful response to life. I’ve learned a lot about it over the last seven years of launching and building my consulting business. But I can tell you that every time I take a moment to be grateful for the small things, I start seeing the bigger ones, too. Gratitude takes many forms. Have you ever noticed that you get more of what you spend time thinking about? My sister 54 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM Then there’s a more complex kind of gratitude: for the things that don’t seem to offer a whole lot to be grateful for at the time. I’m a consultant who runs a solo practice. My entire body of work is on my computer. And one January day early in 2009, that computer suddenly turned itself into a doorstop. It just gave up the ghost. Toast. Okay (deep breath), recession bedamned: my business was set to grow, and so maybe it was time for better equipment and backup. Hm, good thing I have that line of credit. Called the bank – what line of credit? No, they’d cancelled my line of credit back in the fall…oops (ten-days-of-me-digging later), administrative error, so sorry. Could I fax over some documents to show that my company was still legitimate? Well, lady, the minute you restore the line of credit, I can replace my fax machine and send that to you! It was easier to laugh than to cry. I ended up replacing one processer with two, and the new operating system meant I also had to get a new monitor and new combo printer. And I didn’t dig out of my line of credit until after July of 2009. But when the new computers arrived, I nicknamed one “Hope” and the other “Change.” Funny thing is, they’ve brought me plenty of both! And then life dishes up days that are so unutterably, deeply tragic that we can only grieve. Those events change our lives forever. With time, we heal and are able to see how our lives are different, and appreciate the good people and remarkable experiences that entered our lives as a result of even very difficult times. My sister Karen and my brothers Lorne and Dave are close in age but over the last 25 years have spread between Toronto, Peterborough, Calgary and Washington DC. As we’d scattered and started families, we’d spent less and less time doing things together as adults. When we did gather, other family history could make getting together seem complicated at best, and stressful at worst. Then my dad passed away suddenly in 2008. The week following his death was full of the sadness of losing him – and WINTER 2010 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT each of us has very different memories of him. Yet I marveled at how well the four of us, once reunited, merged the best of our extraordinary talents (and set aside our more hard-headed tendencies) in the public and private acts of honouring our father in the wake of his passing. I still miss him very much. Yet, over the last two years, as we’ve gathered more often, I’ve thought about Dad’s passing bringing us the gift of the new appreciation my siblings and I have found for each other. What would it take to weave a single shining thread of gratitude into the fabric of your life? How would your day be different if you added a sparkling accent that catches the light and draws the eye to a flash of beauty, and makes you appreciate the interplay of warp and woof, the craft of the creator, for just an instant? TIPS FOR GRATITUDE JOURNALLING THE WHY A new year is a wonderful time to reflect on the best of the year gone by…and create an inviting place for our dreams to come true in the year to come. The brain and the spirit tend to generate more of what you focus on … so it makes eminent sense to fill your mind and heart with images, sounds and feelings of what you most want to invite into your life. Dr Maxwell Maltz observed in his book, Psycho-Cybernetics, that in twenty-one days of dedicated practice, our brains can lock in a new habit (or a response or an attitude) so strongly that it’s easier to do it than not do it. So, how about it? In three weeks, you could be living, breathing, and attracting more of the things you want to be grateful for. Gratitude journaling is one more form of imagination. And it’s one of the most powerful ways to extend that positive feeling into your day, every day. THE HOW Maybe you’re a regular journaller who’s always inspired by a fresh blank journal. Maybe you haven’t written a personal journal since that mortifying day that somebody found your diary in high school. Either way, this doesn’t have to be hard. And…no guilt. Do your best – that’s all any of us can do. • Book it: If you don’t already keep a journal, get a notebook that you’ll use just as a gratitude journal. Either buy one covered in images you love to look at, or recycle a blank notebook and cover it with a collage of your own pictures or images from a magazine. • Get set: Set the time of day and place that you will write – that’s part of creating a habit you’ll practice – for each of those first 21 days. • Make your commitment: Set a goal for your daily WINTER 2010 journaling. Julia Cameron, in The Artist’s Way, suggested writing three pages, anything that comes to your mind, but keep writing until you have your three pages. Maybe you pick just one page. Or five bullet points. Or just one thing you can find in your day to be grateful for. • Find the Muse in Music: Sometimes music inspires us, or, if it’s hard to find a quiet time and place to write, plugging into your music with headphones can create the space you need. - Procratinator’s tip: Log onto iTunes and explore to find some new music or artists that you’ll use just to prime your muse. Then that music can be part of what gets your mind and spirit ready to write. • Pick a Focus Point… If you find yourself thinking “oh, no, I have nothing to say!”, then you could make a list of “gratitude topics” and work on a different one each day, or even draw one at random from a list of slips in a bag. Here are some ideas: - What did today / yesterday bring that you’re grateful for? - What lessons did life bring you last year in (pick a month) that you want to remember in the year to come? - What are the best things that came out of last year’s worst events? - Who are the teachers in your life that you’re most grateful for? - What’s on your calendar for tomorrow/next week/next month that you’re grateful for? - If you wrote thank you notes to everybody who helped you this week, who would you thank and why? - Which of your talents are you most grateful for, and why? - Which gifts and abilities are you grateful for inheriting from your family? - Who are the people who most embody the spirit of gratitude as you would want to live it? - What are the smallest things in your life that you most often overlook but are really grateful for? • Or just flow….If you find writing comes easily, then you can focus on the theme of gratitude and pen what flows. And.. notice! Notice how you feel – while you write, after you finish. Notice what catches your attention. Do you find yourself saying, “Gee, that’s one for the gratitude journal”? FINALLY, CHECK IN WITH YOURSELF AS YOU PUT DOWN YOUR PEN ON DAY 21. HAS ENOUGH SHIFTED THAT YOU’LL PICK UP THE PEN AGAIN TOMORROW? Y Judy lives in Washington DC, where she’s an award-winning strategic adviser to established business owners who want to win American government contracts. HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 55 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT Karen Woolley GRATITUDE TAKES TWO T There are moments when our hearts are overflowing with joy and we are so grateful for a situation, for people in our lives, or for the blessings we have been given. In moments like these, gratitude comes easy. There are moments of quiet recognition when we realize that who we are and the gifts and talents we have developed are as a result of another or many others, as well as the soul within. There are moments of desperation when the darkness chokes the spark from the light we are, and all seems lost. Yet in those times, the ability to discover the glimmer of gratitude can begin to shift where you seem to be into a whole new zone. For you see gratitude is one of the strongest positive emotions, next to that granddaddy of all - LOVE, and gratitude has love at the foundation. For when you acknowledge the source of the gift, the joy, and delight in that moment, you bring ME into US with love. Gratitude is more than being thankful, although those two words are swopped around now and again. Gratitude includes another or many, and brings a true love and appreciation toward them. The days surrounding the inspiration of this were of turmoil and darkness. My darling husband and I were in a season of difficulty with communication at the core of our stubborn ways. Laundry seemed to be winning the fight against me again and the renovations from last winter needed to have trim put back to just finish the job. We hadn’t lost any more sheep to coyotes but the puppies were having more fun chasing and playing with the sheep than guarding them as intended. The new flock of laying hens was not settling in and the winter coop needed to be finished before the frost came. A dear friend had been on death’s door and come back but 2 fundraisers were needed to keep the family on their feet and the marketing of the events was daunting when financial success was on our hearts. BG Club for boys and girls ages 3 to 11 was in startup mode at the local community hall with months of planning, searching for leadership and then for the children to register. Prayers were cast on all of these overwhelming crisis’s to lift us through the muck and mire. 56 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM Through it were hope and the light of making a difference. Through it all was the gratitude that I had the skills to actualize the plans if the timing would fall into place. Through this season in my life there was much to wish away, but in the end I chose to lift in a huge sigh of praise and be in the middle of it. The woman I am today can appear to be a bundle of joy and a light to the outside world. “Where do you get your energy from? How do you stay so positive? You’re always smiling and full of life … how do you do it?” I smile, and point UP. I can’t do it without Him. God. I receive the power of every day from Him, to do all I need to do, the things I just can’t face, the things I love to do. It’s all about God. And for that I am grateful. The woman I am today looses it when her daughter is moving in the snails pace of an 8-year old and I’m running on my tight schedule that only allows for warp speed. The woman I am today prays for another chance for forgiveness for habits that are hard to break (the nemesis of clutter and laundry – I will beat you yet!). That woman is a product of her parents, siblings, schooling, career choices, family, communities, faith, and is truly a one-of-a-kind. The gratitude abounds in all of those people and in how they touched my life in a George Bailey sort of way. So getting here was easy, looking back on it all! It was a straight line but the tributaries and pathways I could have taken make the journey look impossible. - Take the ME in Grade 6, curled up crying inconsolably in the girl’s washroom after a flippant comment by a boy in the class (Bradt’s flying low!). - Take the ME at 28 as I travelled the world alone, searching for whom I could be and finding the answer “GIVE BACK”. - Take the ME in my 30’s going through a 4th miscarriage feeling hopeless and worthless as a woman. Please take the me who made choices that I don’t want my daughter to make in her lifetime. How did I ever get through it all? There was two or more every time! Beside me were family, friends, co-workers, evil people to run from and loving arms to run to. But if not for all those ME’s of days past, of the mom who inspired, the dad who loved best he could, the husband of second and third chances and the God who lets all this happen for His purpose …. I would not be me. WINTER 2010 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT I am grateful for circumstances, be they dark or brilliant. I am grateful for the joys and strife of motherhood and pray that I could be a freckle of glitter for my daughter as she grows up, just as my mom is to me. I am grateful for those dark choices that forgiveness has wiped clean. Those are the ones that provide the deepest gratitude as they come with the deepest, unconditional love. I look today at the Karen (Bradt) Woolley and know I am not alone and I never was. The tiniest of choices wove together in a tapestry of great beauty with me as the base threads and all those around me creating the patterns. This work in progress has a Master Weaver who can see the final creation and continually brings forth more choices. The joy comes from getting to make those choices and the gratitude comes in looking upon that tapestry, bound together with love. Y Journal Plot out your path. Draw that straight line and reflect on the tributaries and choices that put you there. This is not a time for what-ifs but of What I Am! Draw your tapestry! Take colour and pattern as you reflect on those dark times in your life and the sparkle and brilliance. Think back to the major events and surround them with the people who were beside you. Colour them. Put two columns on the page with one representing you and your circumstances: Home, Community, Career, Relationship, Crisis, Event and such headers. Now list those you are truly grateful for to glean learning from in that place. Have you told them? Buy a box of beautiful blank note cards. Determine to send the entire box out, sending one card per week, and let someone know they’ve touched your life and you are grateful. It has to be a real, snail-mail card. Tactile rules in tapestry land. Reflect on how you would feel if you received such a hand written note in the post out of the blue! Who are the biggest three recipients of gratitude in your life over the last year? How big was the part of forgiveness in that gratefulness? Describe that correlation and what you can do to be more forgiving of others. What was a dark moment in the last year that you can now see through? Find the gratitude for the outcome of that season. Describe how that positive spin and being grateful could have lifted you at the time. Karen Woolley is a Momtrepreneur -, founder of Music For Moppets, a musical playgroup. A wife, mother and Christian, she walks the most inspirational path she can every day. Karen is also Judy Bradt sister! If you would like to contact Karen or find out more about the music for moppets project, visit www. MusicForMoppets.CA or email her [email protected] WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 57 BODY & SOUL Jeff Boris LOVE LIFE AND LIFE WILL LOVE YOU BACK! L “Love life and life will love you back” – these words are hung in my home along with “Life isn’t about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself.” They are the first words I wake up to each morning and the last words I see before going to sleep. As I begin each day it prepares me with the right mindset of gratitude for whatever the day brings my way (“good” or “bad”) and empowers me with a reminder of my inherent potential to create the life experience I desire. At the end of each day these same words help me find the greater meaning behind the day’s events, acknowledging my successes while blessing and releasing the rest. These two very simple life philosophies express the essence of how our destiny is created from thoughts to words to actions to habits. Imagine never having a “bad day”. Those who know me have asked “Do you ever have a bad day?” I used to have my fair share, but now I can honestly say I don’t anymore. My wife sometimes finds this irritating, especially when she’s having her own “bad day”, no matter how supportive I try to be. If you want to put an end to having “bad days”, all it takes is a simple shift in thinking – there is no such thing as a “bad day”; there are only “good days” and “character building days”. For many people I know (including myself) this past year had plenty of character building days. It’s easy to make sense of the “good” in life, but not always so easy making sense of the “bad”. And this is where we tend to go wrong. Our mind likes to label things into nice neat categories we understand. Good versus bad, positive versus negative, up versus down. But the real meaning of what happens in life is not so black and white. One of my favourite stories about this is the “Story of the Taoist Farmer” as told by Chin-Ning Chu: A man named Sei Weng owned a beautiful mare which was praised far and wide. One day this beautiful horse disappeared. The people of his village offered sympathy to Sei Weng for his great misfortune. Sei Weng said simply, “That’s the way it is.” A few days later the lost mare returned, followed by a beautiful wild stallion. The village congratulated Sei Weng for his good fortune. He said, “That’s the way it is.” Some time later, Sei Weng’s only son, while riding the stallion, fell off and broke his leg. The village people once again expressed their sympathy at Sei Weng’s misfortune. Sei Weng again said, “That’s the way it is.” Soon thereafter, war broke out and all the young men of the village except Sei Weng’s lame son were drafted and killed in battle. The village people were amazed at Sei Weng’s good luck. His son was the only young man left alive in the village. But Sei Weng kept his same attitude: despite all the turmoil, gains and losses, he gave the same reply, “That’s the way it is.” 58 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM WINTER 2010 Life perspective is everything. What supportive life philosophies do you live by? How do you practice and reinforce them daily in the face of life’s everyday challenges? How effective are they when it feels like life is trying to take you out of the game? Daily, we need reminders of the most beautiful and deepest Truths hidden beneath life’s rough surface. Here’s a little exercise I use to remind me of what a miracle life is, how much our choices alter the direction life takes and how we’re all interconnected. Think about someone you really care about and love more than anything else in this world and whom you would do anything for. For me it’s my wife and two children. Think about what the people you love really mean to you and how they make you feel. It’s impossible for me to think about Alissa, Brayden and Lauren without being filled with love, joy and a deep sense of gratitude. Now, think about how events in your life specifically unfolded to bring you together. I owe the existence of my children to my wife, my career change, choice in the university I attended, each time I switched jobs, even the death of a family member, my first marriage and divorce all played their part. Not only was the timing of events critical, but how each served my personal evolution in helping me become who I needed to be in order to attract Alissa into my life. What about the impact of the life events of your inlaws, parents or grandparents and all the generations before them? This is quite miraculous when I remind myself how two of my grandparents immigrated to Canada before they had met and married. And from a larger perspective, a world event like WWII influenced each of their family’s decision to uproot their lives and start over. Then there’s the perfect timing behind the biological miracle of reproduction requiring a single sperm out of millions to unite with one specific egg to create a unique human being. This not only had to happen to bring my children into my life but also bring into the world who I am, who my wife is, who each of our parents are and so forth! Just pondering the odds and precise nature at work in the Universe behind the people, experiences and world events that took place to make all this happen leaves me in awe! So whenever we question the reason for something in our life, we are also questioning the very forces responsible for making our most meaningful relationships possible. When we lack gratitude for what shows up in our life today, good or bad, we forget how the Universe works in mysterious ways serving personal evolution within a much larger plan. It is not for us to question the meaning of everything, but to live with faith and to live on purpose. This is what’s behind the meaning of “Love life and life will love you back.” WINTER 2010 Relationships make a wonderful analogy. Can you love someone completely without having faith in them? Do you feel as loved when someone has lost their faith in you? Having faith is an expression of believing that comes from the heart and is a prerequisite for unconditional love. Faith is believing in something or someone without having to understand everything. It’s a feeling more powerful than the rational mind can comprehend. Out of faith comes hope. Out of faith miracles are born. When you “believe” you have more faith in all the good life has to offer. You open your heart to loving life, and guess what? Life loves you back! We live in exciting times! From the residual affects of the Information Age and the impact of the Social Age the new Age of Transformation has emerged! As a Holistic Fitness Professional specializing in Transformation Coaching, I see a renewed focus in healthy lifestyle trends calling people to action in creative ways that’s life-transforming. Amidst the chaos of life there is a natural order. Turmoil and upheaval makes way for needed transition. When embraced, an increase in character-building days opens the door to opportunities for growth accelerating our personal evolution, helping us discover our greatness and prepare us for the future God intended. As this year comes to a close, don’t just be thankful it’s over; finish strong expressing sincere gratitude for all the gifts it brought and purpose it served. This will place you in the best possible position to create and live your best life in the year ahead in complete harmony with these guiding words… Life doesn’t give me the people and experiences I want, but the people and experiences I NEED - To help me, hurt me, leave me, love me, stretch and challenge me, to make me into the person I was meant to Be…something far greater than what I could imagine for myself. The Universe will never ask more of me than what I have within me to handle; the Universe will always fill me with desires that I already inherently have the potential to achieve. However, the greatest reward is not in what I achieve but in who I had to become in the process of achieving it. Therefore, I embrace everything on my journey for everything is as it should be. I am full of greatness and strength. I am meant to live life to the fullest, excelling above my expectations. When I live in harmony with my Higher Self, the source of my greatest and truest desires, success and happiness will always prevail. Your time is NOW…”Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that’s the stuff life is made of.” Y To fulfill your personal transformation contact Jeff Boris, B.PHE, CPTN-CPT.M at www.jeffboriswellness.com. HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 59 ON THE PULSE Liz Palmer A GIRLS GUIDE TO CHAMPAGNE Basic Essentials Grape Varieties and Styles The three primary grape varieties that that are used to make champagne are pinot noir, pinot meunier and chardonnay. The dark-skinned pinot noir and pinot meunier give champagne its length and backbone, while chardonnay gives it acidity notes and biscuit flavour. There are several other grape varieties that are permitted for historical reasons, and are used occasionally. Non-vintage A A Girls Guide To Champagne was developed for women to feel confident in having some basic knowledge on champagne in a social setting, or when choosing from diverse selections of champagne from a wine list or wine store. These can daunting tasks for even the most fearless of women. Not anymore! This handbag-sized guide will arm you - including the headstrong, adventure-loving, cocktail-imbibing, fashion-conscious women - with some basic knowledge on Champagne. THE PRACTICAL PART Not every wine that sparkles can be called champagne. True champagne comes from a special region in France located 90 miles northeast of Paris. Champagne has a legendary history, and has for many hundreds of years been part of many cultural events and historical traditions. This region has a combination of chalky sub-soils and cool climate which produces the only grapes in the world that can yield the Champagne of legends! 60 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM A non-vintage champagne includes a blend of grapes from several vintages. They also have a consistent style, and are made for immediate consumption. Most champagnes are nonvintage. Only a few non-vintage champagnes will benefit from further aging. Vintage Champagne vintages are declared only for outstanding harvest years and are made from a single harvest year. The producers reserve their finest fruit for this style of champagne, adding to its desirability. Not every year is declared a vintage year. Presitge Cuvées This is a proprietary blend, the top of the producer’s range, and is most suitable for cellaring. The trend is that these champagnes come delivered in very expressive, distinctivelyshaped, and labeled bottles. These champagnes are usually made with grapes from Grand Cru vineyards. Blanc de Blancs Blanc de blanc is a French term that means “white of whites”, and is used to designate champagnes made exclusively from chardonnay grapes. The blanc de blancs style is popular as an apértif due to their light, dry taste. Blanc de Noirs Blanc de Noirs is another French term that means “white of black”. This sounds like a contradiction, but it is not. What it tells you is that the champagne has been made only using black grapes. Champagne made from black grapes are typically full bodied with intense richness. WINTER 2010 ON THE PULSE Rosé Nose Rosé champagnes are produced either by leaving the clear juice of black grapes to macerate on its skins for a short time or, the common method, by adding a small amount of still pinot noir red wine to the sparkling wine. Once the initial effervescence has subsided, bring the flute to your nose and inhale slowly, at length and then inhale again. How do you describe the aromas? Are they floral, fruity, vegetal, or does the aroma remind you of dried fruits or some other indulgent delicacy? Sweetness (Brut to Doux) In addition to classifying champagne styles, classifications are also used to refer to sweetness. The amount of sugar added after the second fermentation and aging varies and will dictate the sweetness level of the champagne. • Brut: dry, less than 1.5% sugar (most common) • Extra Sec: extra dry, 1.2 to 2% sugar • Sec: medium sweet, 1.7 to 3.5% sugar • Demi-Sec: sweet, 3.3 to 5% sugar (dessert champagne) • Doux: very sweet, over 5% sugar (dessert champagne) THE FUN PART - TASTING What can you see? What can you smell? What can you Taste? Champagne deserves your undivided attention. You need time to appreciate its colour, effervescence, savor its aromas and define its dominant impressions. Before you pop the cork, there are a few basic rules: • • • • • Flutes should be clean and free of any traces of detergent or rinsing agent [could cause champagne to flatten] Avoid all forms of perfume, i.e., personal or room fragrance [these will interfere with the appreciation of the aromas] Ideal drinking temperature is [8° - 10° C] – chill the bottle for 20 minutes in an ice bucket filled with ice When pouring, fill the glass only two-thirds [this allows the aromas to circulate] Once the champagne is poured, allow some time for it to open up Colour and Appearance Once the champagne is poured, place a sheet of white paper behind the glass; try to identify the shade. Colours can range from: pale gold; green gold; grey gold; straw yellow; yellow gold to antique gold. For rosé champagnes colours range from coral pink, salmon pink to deep pink. How does the champagne look to you? Is it limpid, sparkling or silky? And what about the bubbles, are they: light; fine; lively; plentiful or slow? WINTER 2010 Floral aromas can range from rose, lime blossom, orange blossom or violet. Fruity smells will range from grapefruit, apple, pear, quince, peach, apricot, nectarine, mango, banana, lychee, coconut, cherry or currant. Vegetal bouquets range from almond, grass, fern, to truffle. Dried Fruit odors range from hazelnut, raisin to dried fig. Other indulgent delicacy aromas include butter, brioche, toast, honey, candied fruit, vanilla and various spices. Mouth Champagne reveals its complex personality best on the palate. Try rolling the champagne around your mouth – there is bound to be a dominant impression. How does the champagne feel? Does it feel powerful, solid, comforting, smooth, light, mature, or opulent? Now how would you describe the impression? Is it creamy, delicate or complex? Y GO AHEAD AND ENJOY WHAT IS HIDING INSIDE YOUR FLUTE GLASS! Liz Palmer, Apprentissage Sommelier, is the Chairman of the PCYC Wine Committee; a wine consultant, educator, trainer and writer. She currently writes monthly wine columns on news and trends for Credit Notes, Rob Roland & Associates, “Rob Report”, GAM on Yachting, wineandleisure.com, and monthly wine articles for HEART Business Journal for Women®, Toronto Waterfront Magazine and is International Correspondent for China Wine News. She tastes thousands of wines annually at various events around the world. Liz is a member of Society of Wine Educators, Writers Net, Wine Writers Network, Immedia, TravelWritersCom, International Sommelier Guild member, a member of Women in International Trade, a member of French Wine Society and most recently became a member of the American Media Photographers, Inc. Most recently, Liz Palmer is in the process of writing a book entitled: “Unique Boutique Champagne Houses”. 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You have the power to help her do it. Join us… CARE.CA | 1-888-324-2234 WINTER 2010 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM 63 This space generously donated. Photo © Jason Sangster/CARE PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT This space generously donated. Photo © Chad Ehlers / Alamy PROFILE Jane Smith She lives in a world of famine, civil war and epidemics. But now she’s in real danger. Women in the developing world can give birth to far more than the next generation. They can give birth to new ideas, new businesses, and new sources of income that improve life for everyone. But, tragically, half a million of them die each year from complications of pregnancy and childbirth. Now is the time for action. She has the power to change her world. You have the power to help her do it. Join us… www.care.ca | 1-888-324-2234 64 HEARTBUSINESSJOURNAL.COM WINTER 2010