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FREE
NOTTINGHAM CULTURE
issue #7.
our style is legendary
www.leftlion.co.uk/issue7
credits
LeftLion Magazine Issue 7
October-November 2005
Editor
Jared Wilson
Deputy Editor
Al Needham
Sub Editors
Alan Gilby
Timmy Bates
Nathan Miller
Cristina Chapman
David Bowen
Distribution
Big G
Tim Evans
Design
David Blenkey
[email protected]
Photographers
Dom Henry
Kevin Lake
Josh Shinner
Contributors
Adrian Bhagat
Alex Kocan
Amanda Young
Dan Gardner
Jenny Hill
Mike White
Ollie Smith
Jesse Keene
Roger Mean
Sadie Rees Hales
Tina Carter
Still on tour...
Yemi Akinpelumi
“I want to stand as close to the
edge as I can without going over.
Out on the edge you see all the
kinds of things you can’t see from
the center.”
Kurt Vonnegut
LeftLion
349a Mansfield Road
Nottingham, NG5 2DA
[email protected]
For advertising enquiries
please contact:
contents . . .
editorial
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Welcome to the latest issue of LeftLion Magazine.
A particularly warm welcome to all the students
who return to Notts this time of year.
Goobernapped and stuff from the forum
Is Nottingham the new Amsterdam?
Nottingham is Connected
From Baghdad to Gladrags
Lost Project and The Elementz
Computerman on the hard-drive to success
Strange Brew - Joe Strange interview
The Original Gangster - Hood on screen
Central Connection - Ian Smith interview
The Shims - Andrew and Shauna interviews
Notts On The Box
Notts On Tour
Out and About
A Moot Point - Nic Deshaynes
Nottsword
Rocky Horrorscopes and The Fun Cave
3
It’s definitely noticeable for us locals that the
city gets quieter during non-term time and then
livens up again after, as the packed start-ofterm events listings in this magazine will testify.
Artists performing in Notts over the next two
months include Bloc Party, Roni Size, Mobb Deep,
Grandmaster Flash, Gilles Peterson, Jo Brand,
Ed Byrne, Scratch Perverts, Motorhead and Franz
Ferdinand. This is not to mention the home-made
talent on display such as Computerman, Joe
Strange, Lost Project and The Elementz, who
feature in this issue.
Nottingham is a great city for students. Despite the
occasional banter from the locals, it is on the whole
very student-friendly and the streets are geared
towards easy access to more shops, restaurants,
bars and nightclubs than you’ll ever have time
to get bored with. You may soon be able to drink
around the clock to forget your lectures, without
them ever calling time at the bar. Read inside what
Jennie Hill makes of twenty four hour drinking.
This issue also comes jam-packed with local TV
coverage. We speak to Ian Smith, the Director of
local hive of acting talent the Central Drama Youth
Workshop and two of its products Shauna and
Andrew Shim, who are moving on to bigger things.
We also take a sideways look at a history of TV
programmes from the surrounding area.
This period also showcases the movers and the
shakers in the local arts scene with the Now
Festival and the launch of the Moot Gallery both
of particular interest. With a massive new gallery
set to be built over the next few years, this is an
exciting time for all concerned.
If you fancy contributing to LeftLion in some way
or another then drop us an email. We’re busy
people, but we respond to everyone in time.
Alternatively come along and meet us over a beer
at one of our monthly live nights at The Orange
Tree (third Thursday of the month) and The Malt
Cross (last Friday of the month). See you there.
Mine’s a San Miguel…
[email protected]
[email protected]
office/fax: 0115 9623676
mobile: 07866 312044
8,000 copies distributed in over 50
venues around Nottingham
Cover snappers:
Barnes, Pisces, Alan , Caroline
Jared, Mr. Mean, Bigfatbadger
Dilks, Dom, Denz, Sundaygirl, Will
David, mr.reason, news24, marbelorder
and a large big up to Joel Rusiecki
4
local news for
local people
Nottingham
Voices
things people have said
on the leftlion forum
Students…
without Guy Gooberman, our correspondent gone missing.
They’re a very good thing indeed if you want to live in a
young vibrant city with decent doctors, dentists, nurses,
teachers and a fully functional society in the future.
Fossy
Most students automatically put themselves in debt the
minute they start, and decide they might as well be hung
for a sheep as a lamb, and insist on having it plush. Fuck
chatty houses in Radford, they want those new poncey
apartments in town. On one hand, town runs the risk of
being turned into a huge student village. On the other,
cheaper rents for scab-dog locals like us. Hurrah!
Lord of the Nish
Please note that Guy Gooberman is a fictional character and therefore his kidnapping
is only as real as the news he writes
for more painful laughs visit www.lunch-break.co.uk
GOOBERNAPPED!
I like that we get better and bigger nights when they’re
here, but generally they’ve got little to no respect for
the city or the locals. There are some very safe students
but it’s wild generalisation considering the high student
population.
Jamie
Students inject life into the local culture. We pump money
into the system from clothes to the nights that are being
held at the start of term, firefly for instance seems to only
be on when students are back. It’s due to students that
change in Notts is taking place. What have we done to
hurt you really?
Silo
Some students don’t seem to understand or care that
their neighbours have to get up for work in the morning. I
didn’t understand this when I was a student, and thought
that the daft neighbours should stop moaning when I was
pissed up in the street nicking garden furniture.
Denz
Don’t bitch about the students. They may be losers now,
but one day they will all turn out to be like you and me
Hipster K
Nasty ways to die
I’m afraid of being eaten alive by a giant octopus
Pisces J
Long,slow poisoning/bleeding to death or being attacked
by a shark
Sara
In front of a TV audience.
Adrian
Being drowned in ectoplasm
BigFatBadger
Choking to death on Carol Vordman’s pubes.......
Barnze
In a glass vacuum chamber with the air slowly sucked
from the room whilst shadowy figures laugh and point
from the other side of the glass
MegamanX
Skinned alive with a stanley knife.... by Carol Vorderman
Random Guy
Ripped in half by two talking horses. possibly the ones
from that old Tetleys advert
Hoodmonkey
Botulism poisoning. Being completely paralysed as your
nervous system shuts down, but with your brain still
working. Unable to breath, and dying slowly of oxygen
starvation.
Denz
make your voice heard
www.leftlion.co.uk/forum
LeftLion’s intrepid purveyor of
local news Guy Gooberman has
gone missing in very mysterious
circumstances. He was last seen
heading home from a hard day of
treading the boards in Camberwell
and was caught on CCTV buying
a bunch of carrots and a bottle of
Dandelion and Burdock from a local
24hr greengrocer.
The only London-based writer in
the magazine, Guy moved to ‘the
smoke’ a month or two before the
first issue came out and has been an
ever present in these pages since,
despite generally being located at
least 150 miles away from the ‘real’
action of Hood town.
Until recently he was also almost
omnipresent on the LeftLion forum,
but many have noticed his eerie
silence. Then on the evening of 18
Septmber there was a mysterious
message posted on the LeftLion
forum.
this bloke then I’m sure we can do
something. Why don’t we get some
of those actors from that Tales
of Robin Hood place to sacrifice
themselves for him? I went there
once when I visited the city. I got
to shoot the golden arrow and
everything.”
”We have your Gooberman! If
you want to see him again alive
then we want your Robin Hood in
exchange. We know he is out there.
We also want that Friar Tuck and
Little John. For the exchange of
these terrorists we will leave your
country of Nothingham (sic) alone
for ever.”
LeftLion’s mystic detective and
Clairvoyant Roger Mean said of the
kidnapping: “I saw this coming in
the stars. Gooberman is an Aries and
when I kicked a tray of teacups on the
floor earlier this month, they all fell
nicely into the shape of a little lamb.
From that point on I pitied the fool!”
The chief of Camberwell Poh-lice
Mr Ismokeweede said: “If people do
really give much of an arse about
What will happen to Gooberman?
Check www.leftlion.co.uk for more
details.
From the LeftLion Creative Writing Forum…
Morning
Sometimes when I wake up in the moring I
go Downstairs and I smash the life out of an
English breakfast and I think about all the
friends I have made, which comes to none.
It takes time to count so I put aside the
whole day and I think who cares not me
so I make sickening prank phone calls to
some people in this book that I got through
the post. I read it for ages It’s called the
Yellow Pages.
Roger Quimm
Christmas
Dad’s gone down the boozer
Mam’s stuck in the kitchen
Sister’s on the sofa
Picking her nose and bitching
I’m in me bedroom
Really bored shitless
Thinking very hard about
Becoming a Jehovah’s Witness
All this over-eating’s
Given me the shits
Everybody’s getting
On each other’s tits
Socks from Aunty Vera
Pants from Uncle Frank
When you’re not a kid no more
Christmas is wank.
Lord of the Nish
Yours (edit)
Private jokes we shared
How could anyone understand
A meeting of minds, of eyes
And other bits too
It was always unplanned
Because you can’t write this
Only about this...
…What we really want is to say
Please let tomorrow
Be just like today
But that can be no bad thing
When today was with you
And what I want to say
Before I’m drowned
In poor-taste metaphors
Is that you’re mine
And I’m yours.
articulatedlorry
Lonely wanderings
I wandered lonely as a cat
A cat who’s had his whiskers cut
Scissored off by a group of cruel children
Who are born into a world of hate and pain
I wandered lonely as a bat
A bat who hasn’t played with a ball for time
He has no balls, he has no friends
He is no longer a bat, just a lump of wood
I wandered lonely as a flat
That is a fixed residence with a permanent
address
No legs to wander, no different views to see
It’s task to stay still, until it decays
Spam Ayres
Skeg
I must go down to Skeg again
To the lonely sea and sky
I left a pair of socks last year
I wonder if they’re dry.
Barnze
Scarey animal brigade
spooky bats
big fat rats
horrible flys with big legs that buzz
stripey flys that sting you
small flys that bite you and make your
skin bumpy
big hairey spiders that ate the flys
birds with big claws
and lions with big paws
cows that go moo
and scarey deers too
this is my scarey animal brigade
Jamie aged 6
Log on at www.leftlion.co.uk/forum
5
Is Nottingham the new Amsterdam?
Nottingham, along with the rest of the UK, will collapse in a drink-induced pool of vomit,
crime and decay this November as hoards of people intoxicate themselves in bars and clubs
that never close. Or that is what senior police officers and local press seem to think anyway.
So how are the new licensing laws really going to affect the nightlife of Nottingham?
words: Jenny Hill photo: David Bowen
Between February and August
this year every late night venue
in the city had to renew their
license. This was not solely
restricted to the 350-plus bars
and clubs that squeeze into the
square mile that is Nottingham
city centre. Everyone who sells
anything after 11pm has been
affected by Licensing Minister
James Purnell’s new incentive
to control Britain’s drink culture.
Even fast food vans have had
to reapply to unleash their ratwith-a-hint-of-pigeon burgers on
customers who have had one too
many pints to use their sense of
taste or smell.
Although daylong binges in one
place may appeal to the studentminded amongst us, will the
rest of society follow suit? Real
24-hour drinking needs constant
buses, trains and policing, not to
mention bar staff willing to watch
their peers get merry as they
slave away at work while dawn
breaks. The idea of this legislation
is to stagger closing time, so that
there are fewer problems when
the city staggers home. It is true
that when everyone pours out of
the clubs at 2am the race to the
taxi can get nasty but at least
there is always someone there
to see what is happening. For
girls especially it can be daunting
trying to find your way home on
quieter streets.
With all the blue notices
proclaiming pubs requested
opening hours dotting the city
windows, you would think
most places wanted to stay
open. However many will keep
their new privilege to special
occasions. It is possible that
during the first winter bank
holiday all havoc will break loose
but as John Clarke, Chairman of
the Nottingham Police Authority,
proclaims: “After the initial fuss
has died down, it will lead to a
more civilised drinking culture
in this country and will bring us
more in line with our European
neighbours”.
In most of Europe it is actually
seen as an unusual disgrace
to get drunk in public and this
could be to do with their more
lenient laws. In Germany for
example people can drink beer
and wine from the age of sixteen,
although spirits are restricted
to over eighteens. This seems
to have the affect that getting
drunk is seen as less of a big
thing and therefore far less
exciting. In England people are
so enthusiastic when they can
at last legally drink (or in this
case drink for longer) that they
take advantage and relish in
the novelty. If bars were open
all the time, then it is more than
plausible that the streets would
be calmer as people learn to pace
themselves better.
So have all venues applied for
24-hour licenses as we were
warned? Well, actually no, the
reality is much more sober.
Although of course some bars
tried to cater for the true party
animals of the city, most major
changes to licenses were refused.
Stag party-goers and seedy
men in business suits out there
will be disappointed to know
that Bar Humbug did not get
the strip license it requested.
Instead a gradual change will be
introduced, allowing us to not
have to rush off quite so quickly
at 11. The Malt Cross on St
James’ Street (home of LeftLion
Presents) is one such place that
will change in response to what
the customers want. Though it
has applied to serve drinks until
2am, it will start by opening
until midnight on Friday and
Saturdays and take it from there.
By contrast, local tap-merchants
The Works look likely to have their
licence revoked.
It seems after all the hype; the
new drinking laws will have
little actual effect on going-out
culture in the city. As John Clarke
explains, “people only have so
much money to spend, and if they
are intent on getting drunk, they
will do so regardless of opening
hours!” All night events, such
as those held at Rock City on
the occasional Saturday, have
never caused many problems for
local police before. Even though
the 6am closing time may mean
that drinkers who live far from
the town centre have to wait
around for the first bus, this is
a personal choice that rarely
affects anyone else. Nottingham
may be crawling with stag and
hen parties on the weekend but
we are a long way from being
Amsterdam for now.
LeftLion Forum Crew on 24-hour Drinking
I’m not sure how much difference it’ll
make in the city centre. If you want to
carry on drinking past 11pm there’s
always late bars and clubs you can
go on to.
Linsey
Most pubs who have applied for this
later license have only applied for
an extra hour or two. Hopefully the
Malt Cross will open til midnight,
making LeftLion Presents an even
better night.
Denz
I can just see some idiots getting even
more pissed and violent than they
already do, which is a scary thought
for those on the receiving end. I think
it’s great having the option to stay
out until you feel you’ve had enough
and to go out later on in the evening
knowing that you’re not gonna miss
last orders though.
Sara
Bar owners don’t want a load of
pissed up idiots in the city any more
than anyone else and so most will
just start to close up at the same time
and will just not have to chuck people
out. If you treat people like kids then
they will behave like them. Until the
novelty wears off, some people might
get drunker but then things will settle
out in an adult fashion.
Fossy
I’d hold back on licensing hours and
keep them as they are. There are
already enough clubs and late bars
for violent pissheads and more time
for them to drink would bump up the
crime stats enhancing Nottinghams
already shoddy reputation and giving
the right wing press more bones to
pick at. Re-open the Bomb.
Snowmonkey
6
Nottingham is Connected
October is the month where term starts at both Universities in Nottingham and all the
students return to the city. The good news for students at the start of the new term is
that thanks to Connected Nottingham all current University students can get free internet
access on campus and at venues across the city centre...
Working alongside Tele
Generation, they have
implemented wireless Hotspot
in some of the cities best spots
for eating and drinking including
Cast, The Malt Cross, The Pitcher
and Piano, The Lion Inn and
Saltwater. Non-students can get
access for 30 Days for £10 or a
year for £60.
Nottingham is fast becoming a
UK leader in wireless technology
and not only will students be
able to access emails, use MSN
Messenger and surf the internet,
but they will also be able to make
free phone calls.
All you need to do is take your
wireless laptop along to a
growing number of wireless
hotspots on campus and at
many of the city centre bars and
restaurants including:
Breeze Bar
31-35 Goose Gate
Bunkers Hill Inn
Hockley
Bag o’ Nails
60 Lenton Blvd
The Bar Café
The Cornerhouse
Canalhouse Bar and Restaurant
48-52 Canal St
Cast
Wellington Circus
C K’s
15 Byard Lane
Frog and Onion
Noel Street
Fresh
15 Goose Gate
The Grove
273 Castle Blvd
The Johnson Arms
59 Abbey St, Dunkirk
Kean’s Head
46 St Mary’s Gate
The Lion Inn
44 Mosley Street, Basford
Malt Cross
16 St James’s Street
Mayfields Wine Bar
2-3 Eldon Chambers
The Newcastle Arms
68 Sherwood Street
Red Hot Buffet Shack
38-46 Goose Gate
The Stage
7a Wollaton Street
Saltwater
The Cornerhouse
Sausage
The Cornerhouse
Pitcher & Piano
High Pavement
The Plough
17 St Peter’s St, Radford
The Gate House
Tollhouse Hill
Ye Olde Trip To Jerusalem
Brewhouse Yard
All students (including returning
students) who sign up and
register for their free access
between the start of the new
term and the end of October will
be entered into a prize draw. The
first prize is a Toshiba Satellite Pro
laptop computer. 2nd prize will be
a cool laptop carry case courtesy
of Crumpler UK (the people
who have the shop next to Malt
Cross). The shop is also offering
students from both Universities
15% off selected goods until the
end of October. You will need a
valid NUS card and should quote
“TeleGeneration” to get the
discount.
www.connectednottingham.org.uk
www.telegeneration.com
7
From Baghdad to Gladrags
Many people haven’t even heard of the Miss England competition, however over five thousand
of you voted for Sarah Mendly to be this year’s Miss Nottingham. words: Sadie Rees Hales
British beauty pageants may
have lost popularity in the
Sixties as the role of women
began to change; but this year’s
Miss Nottingham is more than
just tits and arse with a tiara.
She’s a Notts Uni graduate who
knows her stuff about social and
political issues. Sarah Mendly
is also the first female Muslim
Iraqi to win a British beauty
pageant! So is there still really
a place in our society where
women have to shut up and look
beautiful..?
What made you decide to go for
Miss Nottingham?
I thought it would be something
fun to do. I’d seen an advert for a
beauty pageant looking for ethnic
minorities and decided to go for it.
Then I saw the Miss Nottingham
competition and went for that
instead. Beauty pageants are not
my life. I’d only do modelling as
a sideline. You’re buggered when
you start to sag…
The stereotypical beauty
pageant winners are blonde,
love children and animals, and
want to bring world peace. What
do you think sets you out from
the rest?
The fact that I’m a curvy size 12
made me stand out because all
the other girls were thin and had
modest chests… my boobs stood
out! Also, being Iraqi means I had
a different look about me.
How’s your life changed since
becoming Miss Nottingham?
In America beauty pageants are
massive and women like Halle
Berry have won them. It hasn’t
changed here really as British
people are generally so reserved
and don’t make a fuss about
this sort of thing. My family are
blatantly honest with me and tell
me if I don’t look good in photos.
My mother says an old Arabic
phrase which is “A monkey in a
mother’s eye is a dear.”
What made you choose to
support the Children of War
charity?
I support charities that deal
with children whose lives have
been torn apart by war, because
it’s such an awful thing. I also
support Breast Cancer charities.
The Iraq situation is obviously
something close to your heart as
your family are from there. Were
you involved in any of the Notts
anti-war protests?
No I wasn’t. It’s not as simple,
there’s no black or white. I was in
Baghdad in the Gulf War when I
was twelve years old. I remember
the sirens going off and feeling
the ground shaking even when
the fighting was miles away.
What makes you want to write?
Tell us about your poetry.
I started writing in school
when I was nine. They used
to make us write poems and
I enjoyed wracking my brains
while writing. Poetry came quite
easily to me as I found it a good
release of emotion and I write
best when I’m either upset or
angry. Not enough emotions go
with happiness, but when you’re
pissed off there’s so much more
to say. It’s an endless release
of emotion and frustration. I
wasn’t open as a child and very
much kept to myself, so I wrote
my feelings down in my poems
instead.
In terms of a progressive view
towards women, and as an
intellectual woman yourself,
how do you feel being judged
on your looks and treated as a
sexual object?
Your personality is very important
and for Miss England there’s a bit
where we have to show a talent
so hopefully I’ll read some of my
poetry out. The competition is a
choice that you make to do it or
not. For many girls, it can be a
stepping for to a future career.
Do you worry that events like
Miss England give out the wrong
impressions to women about
what they should look like?
That can be said though about
the media as a whole. Pick up a
copy of Vogue and that will make
women feel like they should look
a certain way. There was no
criteria for Miss England, so you
didn’t have to be a certain height
or weight. Our whole society is
to blame for making women feel
they should conform to a certain
beauty, not a single even like this.
You’ve had poetry published, a
Biomedical Science degree and
are this year’s Miss Nottingham.
What are you crap at?
I hate the gym! I prefer doing
a few sit ups at home when
I’m feeling a bit fat. When I
was younger I was never the
attractive one. In fact I was
spotty, wore glasses, had a
moustache and weighed 16 stone.
Men never looked once at me,
let alone twice. You have to be
careful with diets though, the
organisers have told me not to
lose lots of weight when I said I
was trying to drop a dress size.
I’ve resigned myself to the fact
that I will never be crowned
Miss Nottingham. What tips
would you give to next years’
hopefuls?
Just be yourself otherwise you’ll
come across looking awkward.
Hold your head high. I don’t look
like a doll and have managed to
come this far, so anyone can do it!
This year the voting was done
by text message. Did you send a
few sneaky ones for yourself?
Yeah, I sent one. My family sent a
couple as well!
Anything else you want to say to
LeftLion readers?
I really want to open up Goose
Fair. I’ve always loved it since I
was a child and think it would be
funny to be there for the opening.
I’ll have to ask the Mayor. Also
get drunk and have a kebab. Oh
yea, and of course world peace!
Read Sarah’s poetry at
www.leftlion.co.uk
8
words: Jesse Keene
photos: Harry Bastard
It’s hard to pigeonhole Lost
Project within any particular
Hiphop genre. Known for their
infectious beats, vocal prowess
and extremely ‘live’ performances
they are one of Notts rising forces
in the ever-growing pool of UK
musical talent.
As time went on we built the
crew up and it just picked up
pace, sort of like a snowball
effect. The process has been
roughly a year between each
member joining and stems back
to about 1999. But the idea has
always stayed the same because
it is a project that gets bigger
every time and the message is to
urge people to come together and
work as a solid unit.
Hailing from the Dealmaker
Records stable they have just
dropped their debut EP Next
Level Concepts which has
received acclaim from national
radio and music magazines. I
caught up with their spitfire MC
Killa for a brief chat on what
makes the project so personal..
What is the Lost Project story?
How did you get together?
The idea behind Lost Project is
that it is a project itself. Originally
there were just me and Frenic.
We‘d known each other a while
and we vibe off each other in
general.
Next Level Concepts is your first
distributed EP but you have an
extensive back catalogue. What
made it so hard to break through?
We have a huge list of tunes,
but the area (Finsbury Park) we
were living in at the time didn’t
give us the opportunity to push
our stuff further. It was hard to
find likeminded people that were
into the same way of thinking, so
when you did find some one who
was on the same wavelength you
stuck together and pushed your
opinions and talent out there.
The gigs that we could grab were
in the most random of venues, so
it was hard at the beginning to
make a name for ourselves. This
EP shows the most formed as
a collective we have ever been,
because now we have a base
station for the group and can
actually build on that and take it
to wherever it leads. I feel we’ve
been able to put a lot of energy
into the EP and it has made us
push harder as musicians and
also given us a focus.
What, if anything, would you
like the listener to take from the
Next Level Concepts EP?
Firstly I would like them to realise
that this form of expression is
something that can be done by
anyone. Whatever your thoughts
are, if you project them in the
right way people will understand
what you are putting across and
show an interest in what you are
trying to achieve.
When you listen to our music
you will be hearing things about
where we are living and our
personal thoughts that we are not
afraid to tell people because we
are not tied down to any type of
image, we just speak our truth.
Tell us about your forthcoming
album
Our album is very instrumental
and will reflect where our mind
state is as a crew and also as
individuals. Frenic is totally
dedicated to what he does on the
beat side of things and you are
going to be hearing a lot of deep
baselines. There is a lot of melody
involved as well, he has made
it so that every tune is different
from the last. Though most
importantly we want people to
enjoy it…
www.dealmakerrecords.com
Skinnyman, Lowkey, Rukus and
Big Cakes here in the UK…
Liati: ..and in the U.S we working
with Blitz, Dead Prez, and a
management company in Atlanta
called Street Work Entertainment
who are holding us down in the
south, with mans like Lethal, DJ
Chuck T, Camouflage, Rodney
King and Duke Cannons.
words: Jesse Keene
photo: Kevin Lake
Having worked with the likes
of ScorZayZee, Karizma, and
Skinnyman, it would be easy
to try and label The Elementz
as another Notts Hiphop crew,
but their production skills run
deeper than just mere beat
fiends.
How did you two hook up?
Liati: We linked up on the Jungle
circuit in the late ’90s when it
was all still going nuts. Zoutr was
promoting some shows and we
were both DJing around town.
I was doing some reviews for a
magazine and ended up doing a
feature on one of Zoutr’s nights.
Zoutr: We just grew from there
and started building a technique
together and just developed
musically as we went along.
Liati: Yeah, we had a solid
connection from both loving funk
music. We hooked up through that
melancholy sound you get within
some music, the stuff that makes
you screw up your face cause you
know something real deep came
through whoever wrote it.
The men known as Zoutr and Liati
have been shaking up the local
scene for years now with their DJ
appearances and Heavy nights.
They’ve also recently released
their debut EP Elementz Universe
Volume 1 and are making waves
in the national scene. We caught
up with them to see what they
had to say on all things musical
and beyond….
Why did you choose the name
The Elementz?
Liati: The name is something
that’s all encompassing. You
know that nothing is new under
God’s sun. Everything has an
element of this that, and that’s
how we stay.
Zoutr: We take different elements
and feelings when we build
music. We aren’t straight up
Hiphop producers, we appreciate
all types of music with soul and
we try to stay fresh with it.
Tell us about the Notts Hiphop
heads you’ve worked with?
Zoutr: First, I got to say, we’ve
worked with some seriously
talented Nottingham players.
Liati: People like Big Trev and
Outdaville, 45, Daddy Freddy,
Tempa, C-mone and so on,
cemented Nottingham as a
serious, no ramping, Hiphop
Community. To work with people
like Scorzayzee, Karizma and Nick
Stez is very necessary for us to be
a part of this Community and to
try and take it to the next stage.
Zoutr: There’s so many more we
haven’t worked with yet in Notts
though.
What about artists outside the
city borders?
Liati: We bring something
different to the table for each
artist we work with. We see
what identity they want to give
a track, or if they just want us to
go bananas, we just get down in
the way we feel would suit that
particular artist, no matter if they
from NY, Nottz, Jamaica, Sweden
or wherever.
Zoutr: Right now we’ve done or
are doing stuff with dudes like
How do you feel Elementz
Universe Volume 1 has been
received and how are you going
to follow it up?
Zoutr: When it dropped we
expected some movement and
we got some. The last few units
got snapped up when daddy
Skitz selected High Grade
for the Homegrown volume
2 compilation. We’ve already
followed up the debut with some
guest work. Stuff Records just
released Big Cakes debut EP with
a banger from us called Never
Had Time and we done about
half of Karizma’s forthcoming EP
on Dealmaker which is almost
mastered at the time of going
to press.
Liati: We’re still always growing
the Elementz sound, It’s young
right now.
Zoutr: There’s a lot to look
forward to…
You can buy one of the very last
copies of Elementz Universe
Volume 1 now through
www.suspectpackages.com or
www.theelementz.co.uk
9
On a hard drive for success...
words: Ollie Smith
photo: Davina Rose
I wasn’t really in the best of
moods to meet Computerman. A
quick peek at their apocalyptic
themed website and there I
was in Junktion 7 on a Sunday
morning, clipboard in hand,
nursing a hangover of Miltonic
proportions.
release, and are practically
drowning in the stuff when their
slot at Leftlion Presents (30th
September) is mentioned…
However, the previous night the
synth rock band had collected
hangovers from various parts of
the UK; a testament to disparate
roots that include Hull, Leicester
and Wales, but have recently
turned to focus on Nottingham.
As luck would have it their heads
span at a similar rate to mine,
facilitating communication that
morning. Now signed to super
trendy Must Destroy Records
(home to The Darkness) for a
two single deal, Computerman
are Adam, Rhys (drums), Paul,
Rob (guitars/synths) and Mark
(guitars/synths and vocals).
Suitably trendy themselves
(indeed Adam’s hair explores
uncharted territory between
fashion and a hedge strimming
accident), the band ooze
anticipation ahead of their debut
tour and
debut
single
So why Nottingham?
Adam: ‘Well it was the nearest
big city really. We’d formed as
a three piece (and then to a
four piece within a day or so)
in Leicester as mates from De
Montfort Uni and played there for
four years. We’ve only recently
moved here.
Paul: It’s nice to be known as a
Nottingham band though, It’s
good to have a local following
wherever...
So how would you describe
your sound to a stranger to your
music?
Adam: Pop
Paul: Hiphop. Country and
Western.
Rhys: Disco Pop! How about that?
Adam: Can we have Apocalyptic
Space Disco?
No.
Adam: Well Pop it is then. Please
don’t write down Country and
Western. Or anything Paul says.
So, do you think you have any
genre peers in Nottingham or
Leicester?
Paul and Rhys: No.
Adam: I used to live in
the next village
to Kasabian
in Leicestershire. They were
really nice people, but we have a
passionate dislike for their music.
It’s Burberry music really.
Adam: It’s surprising there are
no big bands from Nottingham
though.
Mark: There’s a big unsigned
scene here.
Adam: Did you know I once saw
Mark Morrison buying his own
CD in Leicester?
Would you ever consider doing that?
Rhys: I think I would, just for the
novelty. I don’t know I would if it
were Return of the Mac though.
Adam: I think it was the other one
actually.
How did you get signed?
Mark: It was quite funny really.
We went for a big meeting with
EMI and it was just like you’d
expect. Then just before a gig we
went for a Chinese with a guy
from Must Destroy. We didn’t talk
about music or anything, but he
signed us after the show.
So when is the new single out?
Rhys: ‘No More Broken Hearts’ is
out on the 24th of October. The Bside is ‘Watch More Television’.
What’s that about?
Adam: It’s a modern day Romeo
and Juliet.
In what way?
Adam: err...
Mark: I think the local news could
do a lot more for local bands here.
You know the other night there
was this piece about a kid who
wanted to be a bin man all his life
and somehow someone granted
him his wish. His mum was
crying with joy by the end of it.
Can you believe it?
Adam: My mum wanted me to
play the cello.
Paul: Have you noticed how the
cellists on Top of the Pops are
always really fit?
Mark: I think the cello is the
nicest instrument of all...
Are you looking forward to
touring then?
Mark: Yeah, should be good.
Rhys: We have an orange van!
Me and Mark do the driving, but
Rob’s become insured recently.
The thing is the driving seat is the
most comfortable seat on the bus,
so it worked out quite well for me.
Paul: It does 12 miles to the gallon
on a good day.
Adam: It sounds like a
lawnmower.
If Xhibit were to pimp your van,
what particular modifications
would you request?
Mark: I want the front seat
putting in the back.
Rob: Shoe Polisher.
Paul: Water Cooler.
Rhys: A driver from Mars, like in
Total Recall.
Adam: Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Driving.
If you could have one celebrity
friend, who would it be?
Rhys: Fearne Cotton. I used
to watch her on Eureka about
two years ago, when she had
lovely hair. I was also at School
with Bunf from the Super Furry
Animals.
Is he the one that never speaks?
Rhys: Yeah, cos he’s too stoned.
Paul: I want Anna Friel.
Adam: We were within yards
of Anna Friel the other day in
London and Paul didn’t even
notice.
Rob: Audrey Tatou.
Paul: Actually can I have Sky
Bishop from Neighbours?
Adam: Is she legal?
So finally how did you get your
name Computerman?
Adam: Well, we were called ‘The
band carolgees’, but we stopped
that because it was rubbish.
Paul: So we tried to think of
something slightly less rubbish.
Adam: Rob was wearing a
badge that his dad had made
him when he was little. It said
Computerman on it so we took it
from there...
www.computermanmusic.com
11
A Strange Brew
words: Alex Kocan
The Joe Strange Band have a
colourful history. They once
worked the cruise ships as a
resident band, but now have
their feet firmly on the old
terra firma.
Joe played our Malt Cross night
late last year and is back this time
around for a gig with his band
for LeftLion Live at the Orange
Tree on Thursday 17 November.
The band have recently released
Angel Row, a country album that
sounds like it’s straight out of the
deep south, yet is inspired by the
sights and sounds of Nottingham.
The Joe Strange Band are: Joe
(vocals/ guitar) Douglas Swayby
(bass), Dane Trewitt (keyboards)
and Jeremy Hamilton Marks
(drums). We caught up with Joe
to shoot the breeze...
Where did you acquire such
an interesting name as Joe
Strange?
My parents gave it to me. It’s my
real name.
Describe your sound?
It’s sort of American-based
country. But I wouldn’t say it was
all cows and hats.
photo: Nathan Bell
What are your influences?
Dylan, Van Morrison, Leonard
Cohen, Beatles, Stones. I usually
find American stuff more
inspiring. British stuff has got
more of a sense of humour to it,
which is good, but it has lost
some of its soul at the same time.
What’s your favourite record of
all time?
‘Astral Weeks’ by Van Morrison.
You can tell he’d gone into the
studio with all these wicked
musicians and said “these are my
songs, you’re gonna follow me”.
Each song’s about eight minutes
long. The words and the music
are likeJazz, but it’s not, it’s
really atmospheric. It’s so badly
recorded but it’s superb. I read an
interview with him saying that
it was all planned, but when you
listen to it there’s no way. You’d
have to be completely insane.
Tell us a little about your Angel
Row album. Why this particular
road for an album title?
My mate used to work on Angel
Row years ago. He called it ‘Death
Row’ because it used to be a shit
hole. I like the way the name
sounds awesome and the images
it creates.
How does the band work
together on the album?
Dane’s first love is the piano so
he played piano on the album. He
has a sort of Jools Holland rock
and roll style to his playing. Doug
played bass, Jeremy on drums
and me on guitar. We rehearsed
so much so we knew exactly what
we were doing when it came to
harmonies, electric guitars and
stuff. We basically nailed the ten
tracks, minus overdubs, in a day.
How long did it take to write?
It took a year to write as I wanted
it to be just right. But the problem
I felt was there was no lyrical
direction. I eventually found
inspiration from Nottingham as I
felt real resentment for the way
the place was being portrayed in
the national press at the time.
What’s your personal favourite
track off there?
The Healer because the lyrics
took me so long. I wrote it
about Whycliffe who LeftLion
interviewed once. He was signed
to Sony in America when he was
kid and had two albums out. He
went off the rails and got messed
up. It’s sad as he’s a very talented
guy. The greatest shame, for me,
is that no one knows who he is.
Ever had a difficult un-country
loving crowd?
A few weeks ago we had a bit
of trouble. We started doing a
Tenacious D tribute and then
went into Passenger, by Iggy Pop.
It didn’t go down well. You could
see the anger in these guys eyes.
I was swaying my head to the
music and the next thing I know
I feel this thud on my shoulder. I
looked down and I was covered in
cocktail. Someone had thrown a
glass at me.”
Do you get heckled a lot?
All the time! I quite like it though.
A lot of people shout for requests.
But I’m not going to sit there
with the big book of 100 greatest
busking classics as it’s not what I
want to do with my life.
Who are your favourite other
Notts bands?
I’ve sort of removed myself from
it a bit, but I was very involved
in it all once. I like Headway and
The Hellset Orchestra. When I
saw them the sound man didn’t
know what they were. You could
tell they were good, but he was
mixing them like they were a rock
band. I also like Nick Armstrong.”
What is your best gig so far?
Perhaps the recent album launch
for ‘Angel Row’. We hired out
Snug and got a 5,000 watt PA
system. We got the four of us and
two extra players, Alex Chapman
on lead guitar and Roger Jepson
on Cello. We did the album in
order, live. If people bought the
album they got free tickets to
come to the launch. Everyone was
there knowing what they’d hear
and they liked it. They all came,
we did the album, and it was
great.
Plans for the future?
I’m speaking to a few labels at
the moment about the album,
trying to get someone interested.
I’m already half way through the
next album. I write in the summer
and record in the winter. I’m very
efficient about these things. I’d
like to carry on doing an album a
year. The new album will be the
country sound but there will be
more to it
If time travel was an option
where would you go?
Back to the 60’s. It’s the golden
age of music. I think it was a lot
worse than I’d expect but I’d love
to be around to hear the Stones
for the first time. It would be an
amazing experience.
12
The Original Gangster
words: Nathan Miller
Robin Hood is the ultimate highconcept folk hero. It’s all there in
one perfect tagline: “Rob from the
rich. Give to the poor.” There’s
obviously something about that
mix of lawlessness and radical
economics that strikes a chord
with Tinseltown moguls and
makes for good wholesome family
entertainment, as the story has
been told on screen since movies
first began.
The ‘Golden Age’ Robin of early
cinema was either a moustachetwirling, swashbuckling pirateout-of-water, the Douglas
Fairbanks, Errol Flynn type,
landlocked in the forests of the
East Midlands, or else plying his
trade under an assumed name
in westerns like The Robin Hood
of Texas or The Robin Hood of
El Dorado. Without doubt the
standout Robin Hood picture of
this era is 1938’s The Adventures
of Robin Hood. In many ways
Errol Flynn’s performance in this
film (all twinkling teeth, ardent
romance and deft skill with a foil),
has become the definitive screen
image of the character. The best
scene involves him gatecrashing
a banquet with an entire deer
draped over his shoulders in an
act of glorious macho-camp (the
prequel to yet another enormous
swordfight). Claude Raines and
Basil Rathbone provide strong
support as the villains and the
film was one of Warner Brothers
biggest ever hits at the time of
release.
Hollywood’s jolly swashbuckler
vision of Robin prevailed through
to Richard Greene’s homely
performance in the much-loved
50s TV series, also called The
Adventures of Robin Hood (this
was the show which first gave us
the notorious “riding through the
glen” theme tune, that for years
played before Forest games at the
City Ground). But in the 60s and
70s the most significant versions
of the tales were the ones which
shifted the familiar characters
out of their usual context. Frank
Sinatra starred as ‘Robbo’ in the
Rat Pack musical Robin and the 7
Hoods with a cast including Bing
Crosby and Peter Falk and the
setting transposed to prohibitionera Chicago. Unfortunately it’s
clearly the work of people who’d
rather be doing something else
than making a film, which is a
shame since it’s an interesting
curio and much better than
Ocean’s Eleven. Sean Connery
was more successful playing a
downbeat, grown-up outlaw with
Audrey Hepburn as a mature nun
and a script by William Goldman
in Robin and Marian, but despite
the star billing, the film was
hardly a blockbuster.
Disney’s 1973 cartoon animal
version had much more box
office clout, and is actually one
of the best Robin Hoods from
around this time. The story
is the conventional taxation,
disguises, archery contest stuff,
but the accents are a strange mix,
ranging from southern US drawl
to inauthentic cockney. Despite
that there are some fine vocal
performances, must notably Peter
Ustinov’s oedipal cowardly lion
for Prince John, and Phil Harris
(the voice of Baloo from The
Jungle Book) as Little John. Robin
himself has the rich tones of an
aging matinee idol provided by
Brian Bedford and he is portrayed
here as a fox. Catchy songs too,
and as a whole well worth a
watch (especially if you’re five).
After all this frivolity (and not
to mention 1969’s The Ribald
Tales of Robin Hood), in the 80s it
was time for Hood to get tough.
Michael Praed re-established
the character as a staple of
Saturday teatime telly in Robin of
Sherwood, and was later replaced
by Jason (son of Sean) Connery.
Whilst on the surface it may have
seemed the series was most
interested in showing us just how
perfectly sculpted the leading
man’s hair was, underneath it
was all muddy leather trousers,
shamanic wood spirits and twofisted hard men like Ray Winstone
and Clive Mantle. The series was
also notable for inventing the
character of Nasir the Saracen,
marking the first appearance of
an Arab or Moorish character as
one of the Merry Men, though a
version of this character has often
been included since, most notably
Morgan Freeman’s older Azeem
in the Kevin Costner smash Robin
Hood: Prince of Thieves.
1991 actually saw Hollywood
produce two rival Robin Hoods,
but despite losing the race to
be first into cinemas, Prince of
Thieves had enough blockbuster
savvy and marketing muscle
to stomp Patrick Bergen’s
grittier effort at the box office.
One redeeming feature of an
otherwise mediocre film is Alan
Rickman’s scenery-chewing turn
as the Sheriff of Nottingham,
stealing every scene he’s in.
The rest of it isn’t really much to
write home about, not even the
trip from Dover to Sherwood via
Hadrian’s Wall or Christian Slater
in a catapult.
Two parodies worth noting also
appeared around this time. In
1993 Mel Brooks’ response to
Costner, Robin Hood: Men in
Tights was released to universal
disappointment. Some people
have claimed it marks a low point
not just in Brooks’ career, but also
in the history of cinema. More
happily, in 1989 Tony Robinson’s
response to Robin of Sherwood
was shown on CBBC and it
turned out to be probably the
most straightforwardly enjoyable
version of the tales since Errol
Flynn. In Maid Marian and her
Merry Men, Robin is a soppy
posh boy and practical tomboy
Marian (Kate Lonergan) is the real
brains behind the outlaw gang.
More interesting than the gender
reversal, though, are the laugh out
loud gags and huge quantities
of mud. There’s no escaping the
fact that it’s a show for kids, and
people who find Blackadder too
silly may not quite be able to
stomach it, but there’s not much
else on this list that’s as much
pure joycore fun to watch.
So what next? It seems as
though Robin may be about to
make another return to Saturday
Nights, with the BBC announcing
plans for a new series after the
successful revival of Doctor Who.
Inevitably, the announcement
brought up speculation over who
might end up filling the famous
green tights, speculation which
has, worryingly, included the
name ‘Robbie Williams.’ Make of
that what you will. What’s certain
is that having been part of the
national consciousness since
the Middle Ages and not having
exhausted that killer high-concept
yet, we’ll still be telling tales of
Robin Hood for a long time yet to
come.
Robin Hood on Screen
The various faces of Nottingham’s best known outlaw
Main pic: Errol Flynn. Clockwise from top left: Maid Marian and her
Merry Men; Michael Praed as The Hooded Man, Sean Connery and
Audrey Hepburn; Richard Greene
Central Connection
For more than twenty years, a
Nottingham drama school has
been producing successful actors
and film makers. From Children’s
TV, to prime-time British drama
to serious Hollywood films, they
wouldn’t be quite the same were
it not for a small workshop that
runs a few nights a week in the
underground of the Lace Market.
The Central Youth Drama
Workshop lead Samantha Morton
from a tough upbringing in a
Nottingham children’s home to
Hollywood stardom (Minority
Report, Enduring Love, Code 46,
In America). It has also been
responsible for producing dozens
of other talented and successful
young actors for both stage and
screen including Toby Kebbell
(Dead Mans Shoes, Alexander),
Chris Gascoyne (Peter Barlow in
Coronation Street) and Shauna
and Andrew Shim. We spoke to
the Workshop director, Ian Smith,
the man who has seen them all
come through.
How did the workshop get
started?
In 1983, Central Studios was
created and they wanted to have
a children’s casting resource. At
the time children’s programmes
used London casting schools
– the teeth and tits brigade – and
they wanted more realistic kids.
I was doing volunteering with
the Lace Market Theatre group
and they brought me in to run the
under-11’s group.
Did you know at the time that it
was going to be so successful?
No, although that pioneer group
of 1983 have gone on to be really
successful. People like Julian
Kemp, (An Emmy and BAFTA
Award winning director), Pui
Fan Lee (Po in the Teletubbies),
Chris Gascoyne. Now we have
a reputation internationally,
Spielberg, Woody Allen, Scott
Rudin, they all know about us.
Is the workshop’s future secure?
I think so. Last year the studios
were being closed down so the
raison d’être of the wrokshop had
gone. ITV reduced our funding
by 50% but we hired a consultant
who said we were fantastic
and should be expanding. So
we’ve started a satellite group in
Birmingham and are looking at
Leeds and Manchester.
Now we’re looking at getting
co-funding from the BBC.
There’s seems to be a public
service feel to the workshop.
The kids that come to us are
not the kind who would go to a
theatre group. Television acts as
a magnet to get the scallies in,
thinking they’re going to make
it, and we just look for talent. We
get a wonderful mix. Some go
to private schools and some are
school refuseniks.
Could you see Samantha
Morton’s potential when she
first joined?
At fourteen she said to me ‘I want
to go to Hollywood’ and I told
her to bring her sights down but
she was quite right and she had
the determination to get there.
However, she was too much to
handle. At times the workshop
wasn’t big enough for her and
she wasn’t a good team player
because she was so desperate
to act. You’d ask for a volunteer
and it would be Sam every bloody
time elbowing the other kids out
of the way.
I had to chuck her out at one
point because she was having a
bad time in the children’s home.
I encouraged her to get back on
the straight and narrow so she
could fulfil her potential. We were
casting for The Token King which
was filmed in Frank Wheldon
school. I said to the director, Ray
Kilby, “This girl’s either going to
be your worst nightmare or the
best thing that’s ever happened
to you.” I told Sam that if she
gave this movie 100% then she
would be back in the workshop
and the rest is history.
You’ve been casting a new film
for Shane Meadows.
It’s called This Is England,
set in the 1980’s. Like most of
Shane’s films it has an element of
autobiography in it. When he was
young he naively got involved
with a bunch of skinheads. I don’t
think he realised there was a
racist element to it and soon he
was being pulled into the politics
of the National Front. There’s a
13
words: Adrian Bhagat photo: Dom Henry
lot of humour in it, but there’s
a darker side with some really
harrowing scenes of racism. At
the centre is a very strong young
actor, not one of ours, but we are
supplying about 60% of the cast.
What are the names from the
workshop to watch?
We have a guy called Jack
O’Connell from Derby. He’s
already achieving more than
Sam (Morton) did at her age. If
I can dissuade him from joining
the army, he’s going to be
phenomenal. He’s got a lovely
family, he’s hardworking but a
real bad-lad. When most kids who
come to do drama, bless them,
are nice, white and middle-class,
everyone looks for that charisma
and I often find it in kids that I
would hate to teach at school. But
get them interested in a piece of
drama and something happens.
Jack recently had a screen test for
a new movie with Cate Blanchett
and Judi Dench about an affair
between a teacher and a pupil.
If he’d got the part, his career
would have been stratospheric,
but he’s a year too young.
Your advice for young people
who want to get into acting?
Pushy parents get them into
drama school too young and
they’re indoctrinated by wellmeaning old dears. It takes us a
long time to unteach them those
things. If you can find a good
youth theatre group, that’s a lot
better than the outfits that are
trying to make money out of you.
And for adults wanting to act?
Don’t sign up as an extra.
That’s soul-destroying. Amateur
theatre, like the Lace Market and
Nottingham Arts, is a good place
to start. It’s good if you can start
a pub theatre company and learn
all aspects of putting on a show.
There are other routes – such as
the small film producers like those
in Intermedia at the Broadway
Cinema, who tend to sidestep
traditional casting agencies.
What do you think of reality TV?
TV today seems to be driven by
looking at a target group and
creating a programme for them.
Makeover TV, reality TV, it’s
lazy and cheap. If writers and
directors can’t compete with that,
we have to look at hybrids that
mix reality with performance.
We’re all interested in seeing how
real people react, but Big Brother
today is more of a freak show.
Anything else you want to tell
our readers?
There’s a refreshing anti-bullshit
quality to people in Nottingham.
I can see the potential for an
explosion of the arts here, so
it’s up to you guys to go out and
support it.
14
Shauna and Andrew Shim both
arrived in Nottingham from the
rather sunnier climate of Miami
USA, when they were kids (she
was ten and he was six). Shortly
after settling Shauna discovered the
delights of the Central Drama Youth
Workshop and Andrew followed her
a few years after, which provided a
suitable grounding for both of them
to launch budding acting careers.
��
words: Jared Wilson photos: David Bowen
Andrew
When you were filming did
you realise that A Room For
Romeo Brass would be such a
big success? Everybody in Notts
loves that film…
I didn’t even think about it to be
honest. It was only two months
after I’d got the part that I got
told it was going to be released
at the cinema. I thought it was
going to be a channel three film or
something.
You’ve struck up a good working
relationship with Shane
Meadows since then…
Yeah. After we did Romeo Brass
we became good mates and I’d
visit him on weekends and stuff.
I had a part in Dead Mans Shoes,
which was quite big when we
were filming, but it eventually got
cut out of the final picture except
for being in the crowd at the
funeral scene. We also did Once
Upon a Time in the Midlands.
That must have been interesting,
working with Robert Carlyle,
Kathy Burke and Rhys Ifans…
It was a brilliant experience
working with them. All three are
cracking people and I definitely
learned a lot from them. I’d seen
Kathy Burke before and I’d seen
Robert Carlyle in The Full Monty,
but it was only when I met them
that I realised they are actually
quite big stars and they know
how to handle it.
What was it like working with
Paddy Considine in his first
screen role?
Paddy is brilliant! He’s a proper
good laugh and a tremendous
actor. I’ve met up with him quite a
few times and seen him progress
into Hollywood and stuff, but
he’s just the same guy really
and no different to how he was
back then.
Tell us about this new film
you’re shooting with Mr
Meadows?
It’s called This is England. I can’t
say all that much, but it’s set
in the early eighties around a
skinhead gang. I play one of the
members of the gang along with
Stephen Graham, who played
Tommy in Snatch. Vicky McClure
who was my co-star in Romeo
Brass (and is now my girlfriend) is
also part of the gang as well.
Who are your favourite actors?
Is there anyone that has really
inspired you?
If I had to choose a Hollywood
star, I’d say that I do like Denzel
Washington. Everything that he’s
done has been outstanding, he
makes even crap films good, just
by being strong. It’s actors in
British films that I really look up to
though. I know about the budgets
and I know what sort of person
it takes to be able to pull a good
script off.
What have you got coming up
over the next year?
I’m going to try and get an agent.
Even now I haven’t got one. I was
young when I did Romeo Brass
and I probably haven’t pushed
my acting as much as I could
do. It’s only now that I’m older
that I want to take it a lot more
seriously.
Any other parts to tell of…?
I did a cartoon in Canada for a
month in Montréal called Fungus
The Bogeyman. I got that part
through the workshop and did the
motion capture and the voice. I
did the voice of a character called
Grot. I think Martin Clunes is also
doing one of the voices.
So what do you do when you’re
not acting?
I buy and sell sports cars. I’m a
bit of an Arthur Daley… you can
make a good living out of it. I’ve
had about fourteen Subarus in my
time and I’ve just sold an Evo six,
so anything that goes fast.
What advice would you give to
young actors in Nottingham?
Don’t take it too seriously, if it’s
meant to happen it will. Acting is
a horrible career. You can be the
biggest thing one year and then
for the next few you don’t work at
all. Just take it in your stride. Most
of all enjoy it and have a laugh.
You only live once…
Have you ever starred in
anything with your sister
Shauna?
We were in a play called Can
You Keep a Secret for the Central
Workshop at the Playhouse, but
that’s about it. No-ones ever cast
us both together.
LeftLion readers?
If people ever recognise me out of
Romeo Brass and want to come
up and chat then I want them to
know that I don’t ever get sick
of it. It’s not about being bigheaded, but it’s hard to believe
that you can make something
that people really do love that
much and I’ll always have time for
people who want to come up and
say hello.
Shauna
What did you think to
Nottingham when you first
moved here?
I didn’t really like it very much at
first. I thought people spoke funny
and it was too cold!
I understand that you got you
first break in TV at the age of
eleven?
Yeah I did a show called Go Wild!
with Chris Packham and some
other kids from the workshop.
Good times man! We got a couple
of days off of school a week and
we got to be on TV!
You’ve still got a US accent still.
Have you made an effort to keep
onto that or did it just happen
naturally?
To be honest I don’t think my
accent is that strong anymore.
It’s very diluted, kind of a strange
Andrew, 22, got his first big break at the age
of fourteen, landing the title role in Shane
Meadows second film A Room For Romeo Brass.
Since then he’s acted alongside the likes of
Robert Carlyle, Kathy Burke and Rhys Ifans
in Once Upon A Time In The Midlands and is
currently filming the new Shane Meadows
skinhead drama This Is England.
15
Shauna, 25, has been acting professionally
since she was eleven. She appeared on our
screens last year in the Billy Ivory directed
BBC series A Thing Called Love and also had
a regular part in the revival of ITV soap
Crossroads. On a more global tip,
she appeared alongside Nicole Kidman
in the 2003 film Dogville.
hybrid of both Miami and
Nottingham. My older sisters
have much stronger accents, but
compared to Andrew I sound like
a full on Yank!
Tell us about the Central Drama
workshop and how it helped you
to train to become an actress?
There is absolutely no way I’d
have had anywhere near the
success I’ve had so far without
the workshop. I love to perform
and down at workshop there
were all of these wicked people
who shared my passion. There
was no competitiveness or back
stabbing or judgement and that is
something that was so liberating
for me.
You were a regular in Crossroads
as Philomena Wise…
Crossroads was such a great job!
Being able to live at home was
such a novelty because most of
the time I have to travel. Although
saying that, I do love to travel!
When I did Crossroads there was
only Lucy Pargetter and myself
from workshop. The series before
had plenty of workshop talent in it
though! I’m still really close with a
lot of the cast from my series.
I adored A Thing Called Love and
we had an amazing time shooting
it. Billy’s writing is so honest
you can’t help but be drawn in
and relate to his characters. He’s
a poet. It’s an absolute dream
working with him.
You had a small part in Dogville.
Where was that filmed? What
was it like working with Nicole
Kidman and Lars Von Trier?
We shot Dogville for two months in
Sweden and it was phenomenal.
Lars is a genius and working with
him is such a privilege. He works
you real hard and it’s something I
really appreciate. Nicole is such a
lovely woman. She’s very kind and
giving and generous with her time
and she taught me a lot. She’s got
a great sense of humour too.
Who are your favourite actors?
I never know what to say when
people ask me this! Honestly,
I always knew I’d be an actor.
There wasn’t any one moment
when I was watching a movie or
whatever and suddenly thought
“that’s what I wanna do!” Umm,
I really like Sean Penn. When he’s
on the screen you can’t take your
eyes off him. Nicole and Gary
Oldman are chameleons which
I admire and Halle Berry for her
range and grace. I think Rosario
Dawson is amazing also Rachel
McAdams.
From an internationally famous
director like Von Trier, you
then went on to work with
Nottingham’s own Billy Ivory…
What have you got coming up
over the next year?
I’ve got a couple of movies I did
whose release dates are pencilled
for 2006. There are a few projects
I’m considering though I don’t
think I’ll be able to do them all. I
don’t like to talk about future stuff
until the ink’s dry on the contract.
I’m a little superstitious like that.
Have you ever starred in
anything with your brother
Andrew?
We were in the same play once at
workshop and we had one scene
together but our characters didn’t
even talk. I’d love to work with
Andrew. Every time I see him
perform I’m blown away. I’m well
proud of him.
What are your favourite places in
Nottingham?
I love Wollaton Park. Every time
someone comes to visit me here
I’m like “I have to take you to
Wollaton Park!” I like all the space.
The town centre is pretty cool.
I like to walk around with my
headphones on and just feel the
buzz and energy of town. The
architectures beautiful too.
What advice would you give to
young actors in Nottingham?
Don’t become disheartened by
rejection. They’re not saying you
don’t have a spark, it’s just not
the spark they’re looking for. Also
believe in yourself. Because if you
don’t, you can’t expect anybody
else to.
You’ve been known to work the
bar at the Malt Cross on LeftLion
Presents nights. Can we buy you
a drink?
Sure thing! I’ll have a gin and
cranberry with plenty of fresh
lime!
our readers?
You all Rock!
16
17
Notts on the Box
A history of Nottingham on the small screen...
words: Al Needham
ATV
Rabidly Birmingham-centric ITV region
which served the whole of the Midlands
from 1956 to 1981, producing some of most
popular and well-remembered programmes
in TV history. But none of them were ever
filmed in Notts, so forget ‘em. Local news
programme ATV Today seemed to believe
that Wolverhampton and Stourbridge
were more newsworthy than anything
Nottingham had to offer.
AUF WIEDERSEHEN PET
Massively successful early 80s Central
drama series, miles better than the recent
BBC1 revival. Much of the second series was
filmed in Notts with Barry running through
the old Savoy Hotel opposite Clarendon
College looking for his fiancée and various
other Notts villages featuring.
A THING CALLED LOVE
Hit-and-miss 2004 Nottingham-based
drama series. Hardly anyone in the city can
remember what happened in it, because
they were too busy pointing at the screen
shouting “Fookin’ hell, that’s Aspecto” and
“Hasn’t Paul Nicholls got a shit Nottingham
accent?”
BLIND DATE
Mindless durge that wasn’t filmed
in Nottingham at all. So why are we
mentioning it? Because after the fall of
Communism, the pilot of the Russian version
was filmed at Lenton. The winner got to go
out with a potato.
BLOCKBUSTERS
Bewilderingly successful Central ‘Young
Adult’ quiz that went on for ever and ever.
Mainly populated by the kind of knobends in U2 t-shirts you’d avoid at college,
with lucky mascots who would all do the
Blockbuster Dance every fifth episode. Bob
Holness (who didn’t play saxophone on
Baker Street, but was the first ever actor to
play James Bond on radio), was your genial
host. He once to got complaining letters
saying that when he waved goodbye, it
looked like a Nazi Salute.
BOON
“Hi Ho Silvah! Here come me Lone Rangah!”
Mid 1980s Central series that seemed to go
on for ever. Ken Boon is an unemployed exfireman with arse all to do, until his mate
got him a job as a Western-themed courier
rider. First set in Birmingham, the ‘action’
moved to Notts in latter series and is chiefly
remembered as Neil Morrissey’s big break
as Rocky, the thick but shaggable one (a
part he has reprised in everything he’s done
since).
BULLSEYE
Forever associated with Sunday teatime at
your Nana’s, it’s impossible to watch repeats
of this on Granada Plus without having
the taste of tinned salmon sandwiches in
your mouth. Recorded in Nottingham for
a colossal thirteen years, by which time
there was a five-year waiting list to just
to sit in the audience, and Bully had been
barred out of Easy Street, Zhivagos, and
Ritzy’s. Hundreds of expensive speedboats
have been left to rot in council estates as a
result…
CENTRAL
Where Nottingham TV begins and ends.
ATV were forced to treat the East Midlands
better in the early 80s, so it changed its
name and split into two. This lead to our
own news service and a whacking great
new studio in Lenton. Sadly this was all
gobbled up by the detestable Carlton in 1994
and now even Central News East comes out
of a studio in Birmingham. Bastards!
CENTRAL WEEKEND
Long-time mainstay of Friday-night telly
and a great opportunity to see people
having massive hair-pulling rows without
leaving your armchair. I went on this once,
they sent a chauffeur to pick me up from
Nottingham, put me in a green room with
assorted Satanists, tantric sex experts and
mad old women who made their dogs wear
wigs, poured loads of free beer down me
neck, allowed me to say ‘bollocks’ and ‘piss’
on live TV and then dropped me off at me
Mam’s. Skill.
CONNIE
Mid-80s one-series potboiler about the
Nottingham clothing business. Stephanie
Beecham was so impressive as a hard-faced
but saucy rag-trade tycoon that she ended
up having a bitch-fight with Joan Collins on
Dynasty a year or so later (and she fookin’
well Panned ‘er, youth).
COPING WITH…
Late-90s BAFTA-winning docu-series
featuring local youths from the Central
Junior Workshop, talking about and acting
out, y’know…issues.
CROSSROADS
Much-maligned, long-running Nana-magnet
of a soap which ran on and off for nearly
40 years. The first version was filmed in
Birmingham and starred Noele Gordon, who
in her previous job as a chat show hostess
had recorded a live show at the City Ground
with an audience of 27,000! In 2001 it was
relaunched and filmed in Nottingham, with
lots of local actors appearing including Pete
Dalton, Lucy Pargetter and Shauna Shim.
Unfortunately it died on its arse and was
the final death knell for the Lenton Lane
studios…
magic at the BBC in the early 90s, but got
battered by Richard and Judy. Nick went on
to wear loads of jumpers and become the
template for Alan Partridge, Anne became
a Big Brother contestant and campaigner
against cot death.
CATCHPHRASE
Rubbishy tea-time quiz hosted by Roy
Walker, remembered only for his own anal
sex-related catchphrase “It’s good, but it’s
not right”. Oh, and that episode where Mr
Chips looked like he was wanking himself
off over a snake’s face.
NEW FACES
The Pop Idol of its day, New Faces gave the
world Showaddywaddy, Les Dennis, and
Jim Davidson. For some bizarre reason, they
brought it back in the mid-80s and filmed it
in Notts. No-one who won it went on to do
much.
DOCUMENTARIES
Loads of them about Notts in recent years,
because, y’know, if we’re not glassing each
other in pubs in town, we’re shooting at folk
in our rathole estates, right? Every single
one is required to contain the following
footage; 1) Fat girl lying in the road showing
her knickers 2) Big Issue seller’s dog biting
a Gary on the arse 3) Bell-ends in the square
sticking their arms out in a ‘fronting up’
gesture 4) Steve Green talking to half a
dozen drunken Shazzas outside Flares 5)
Someone you know embarrassingly lying in
a pool of their own vomit in a taxi rank.
NOTTINGHAM IS MY NEW YORK
Advertising campaign for Clarks shoes,
which was run nationally alongside other
spurious city slogans such as: ‘Preston is
my Paris’. Filmed on Maid Marian Way and
broadcast on TV in 2004. The subsequent
‘Beeston is my Bronx’ campaign was
abandoned.
PALACE HILL
Central Junior Television Workshop youths
pretend to be younger members of the Royal
Family when they were still likable kids and
not the inbred wasters they are today (the
Royals, that is, not the Central kids).
EASTENDERS
Nottingham becomes briefly descended
upon by of a load of screaming cockneys
when, in a failed attempt to escape the
ugliness of the Saskia murder investigation,
Teresa Di Marco and Matt Rose go on the
run to hoodtown. Steve Owen (Martin Kemp
with lard in his hair) follows. Luckily they
only stayed two days.
FAMILY FORTUNES
Long-running gameshow filmed in
Nottingham during its latter years, when
Max Bygraves and Les Dennis were doing it
instead of the mighty Bob Monkhouse. Prerelease publicity claimed that a ridiculous
sum of money was spent on a supercomputer (Mr Babbage), but all it seemed to
do was make farting noises.
HARDWICKE HOUSE
Possibly ITV’s worst ever sitcom (and that’s
saying a lot), this attempt at ripping off
Grange Hill and being all ‘controversial’
lasted a mere two episodes before it was
canned.
HARRY’S MAD
Long-running children’s sitcom based on
Dick King-Smith’s best-selling book. The
Harry of the title is a young boy, Harry
Holdsworth, who inherits ‘Madison’
from his eccentric uncle, a wisecracking,
backchatting African Grey parrot (the ‘Mad’
in the title). The parrot is a world expert
on everything and a general all-round
entertainer. Guest stars visiting Harry’s Mad
during the first two series included Dave Lee
Travis, Michaela Strachan and snooker great
Steve Davis, but the third series brought
about major changes. Much of the cast came
from the Central Drama workshop.
NICK OWEN AND ANNE DIAMOND
The first newsreaders on Central News East,
they shot to stardom when poached by TVAM in the mid-80s. Tried to work the same
RICHARD BECKENSALE
Without question, the most successful actor
Nottingham has ever produced. Went from
Clarendon College to starring in not one but
two of the most popular sitcoms of all-time:
Porridge and Rising Damp. Died of a heart
attack at the tragically young age of 32.
ROBIN HOOD
Always seems to pop up every decade on
telly. The 50s series starring Richard Greene
produced the theme tune that Forest ran out
too, the more mystical 80s version starring
Michael Praed’s mullet and Clannad. Not
forgetting the one by Tony Robinson where
Maid Marion ran ‘tings.
SUPERMARKET SWEEP
Student fave from the early 90s which
catapulted former Radio Trent DJ Dale
Winton into the world of B-list celebrities.
The actual studio was built in Lenton
studios by the Co-Op. Fact: after the riots in
Hyson Green in 1981, Dale Winton said “Oh,
isn’t it terrible about the riots? For those of
you who took part, I hope you all die.”
THE PRICE IS RIGHT
The first game show that actually gave out
proper prizes like America does, this was a
non-stop 80’s assault on the senses filmed
in Lenton and hosted by our very own Leslie
Crowther. The audience were whipped into
an orgasmic frenzy whenever someone had
to guess the price of a toaster and it went
rubbish when Bruce Forsyth started hosting it.
WOOF
Drama about a boy called Eric who turned
into a dog, based on the books by Allan
Ahlberg. Change always happened at
inappropriate moments, which was the
cause of much amusement. In the end the
actor playing Eric himself changed three
times.
YOUR MOTHER WOULDN’T LIKE IT
Central Junior Television Workshop sketch
show that was like the kids on Why Don’t
You, after inhaling cans of Bostik that had
been shoplifted from Wilko’s. Half of the cast
went on to various levels of success in TV,
while the rest got pub jobs.
19
Rocking Das Fest
The Hellset Orchestra and The Petebox
at Das Fest, Karlsruhe, Germany 22-24 July 2005
words: Mike White and Tina Carter
Since 1969, the fair city of
Nottingham has been twinned
with an unsuspecting German
populous that calls itself
Karlsruhe. These folk from across
the waves don’t just have pickled
cabbage and wiener schnitzels
to offer, they have something far
more exciting up their lederhosen.
But the beginning of this story
starts off closer to home...
It was the 22nd of March 2005.
The English sun struggled to set
its self behind expanding clouds
and underneath all this beauty
a contest was on at the Rescue
Rooms. The clotted cream of
Nottingham’s local bands took the
spotlight and strutted their stuff,
all in the hope of impressing a
German guy in the audience and
nabbing a place in festival history.
Rolf (the German guy) had come
over from Karlsruhe to source
some fine Nottinghaemian talent
to take back home with him. After
a nerve-pulling sabbatical the
results were in and The Hellset
Orchestra and Petebox were both
invited to go and entertain their
doppelgangers at a music festival
in Nottingham’s twin city.
This brings us neatly to the
main event. Das Fest, or as we
might translate it ‘The Festival’,
cascades yearly upon the sleepy
cafes and gut-busting restaurants
of Karlsruhe. Organised by the
Karlsruhe Youth project, it has
been a music-driven, alcoholfuelled, well-mannered avalanche
since 1985, showcasing such
well-known delights as Chaka
Khan, Fun Lovin’ Criminals, Van
Morrison, Jimmy Cliff, Jethro
Tull and Nottingham’s very own
Skinny Sumo. This year was also
the festival’s 20th anniversary,
so my expectations were so high
you could have nailed a flag to my
head and called me a mountain.
Imagine a fair-sized hill topped
with boozing smiley Euro teens.
At ground level there are stages,
beer tents, food stalls and other
oddities including volleyball, a
kids stage, air hockey, ice cream,
beer, rowing boats, kids bungee
apparatus, ice cream, beer,
hammocks, charity stalls, an igloo
made of branded cola bottles,
BMX ramps, beer, a play bus,
random sculptures and more beer.
The Petebox gave an amazing
performance on Friday night on
the Tent stage, cunningly crafting
noises from his mouth, which
could make drum machines blow
a fuse with jealousy. The mixing
of the beats and the vocals and
the subsequent repeats of the oral
glory sent the crowd absolutely
mad. Not only does this man
successfully spread his sound
wherever he goes in the world,
but he also does a great version of
Australian kids TV classic Round
the Twist.
A hard night of German booze
later and it was a burning
Saturday afternoon. Crowds of
relaxed German dwellers were
lying around bathing in festival
spirit and struggling to glug on
their bottles. The first scrambled
notes of the organ are struck and
there’s no going back as The
Hellset Orchestra begin their
international debut. Breaking
into old favourite Come into My
Lab, He Said the Hellset, as usual,
warmed up the onlookers and as
time went on their nerves seemed
to settle into the foreign and
overwhelming surroundings of
the main stage.
What the Germans made of
Hellset’s Victoriana style, it is
hard to judge, although the lyrical
complexities of songs such as
Zippelfagottist Through Periscope
may have strained their linguistic
comprehension (as it does with
most English audiences). You
can’t beat this band’s sound for
something original, each song
is more cross-bred than the last
containing 40s swing, 80s jazz and
90s metal. The most satisfying
part of the set was to see the
whole band explode within
Orpheus’ Incredulous Eyepop
with a crescendo that repeatedly
slapped the faces of the audience,
especially those attempting to
keep up with their flailing limbs.
The organ grinder (lead singer
Michael Winterbottom) wowed the
crowd with his German language
skills, proving that GCSE’s can
sometimes pay off, projecting
much welcome audience banter
such as “very, very, very, very,
very thank you good” in the
native tongue, and what must
have been the German equivalent
of “Biirrrddd!”. As for the folk
who have seen the Hellset strut
and sing their twisted world on
Nottingham stages before, for
a change the seven-piece band
had enough room to swing a cat
each. That’s seven whole cats, you
know…
The third day of the festival was
a bit of a blur, apart from the
formidable force of The Symphony
Orchestra of the School of Music
Ettlingen and their version of
John Williams’ Star Wars sound
track, complete with a tear
jerking Princess Leia’s Theme
and the incomparable “The
Imperial March” (Darth Vader
theme). If you have never seen
a live orchestra play in the open
air before, see it, you must. Nice
family fun, but powerful stuff all
the same.
So the days of Das Fest flew
by like a drunken binge and
before we fully sobered up we
were on the tram back into
town wondering how a clean
and efficient public transport
system works when no one ever
pays? As for Karlsruhe, the city
is certainly not an evil twin,
with it’s curiously placed zoo,
miniature pyramid and palace
surrounded by vast statues of big
men killing dragons.
All in all it was a prima three
days. Thanks brüder, good to
meet you!
The new Hellset Orchestra
EP Greetings From The Great
Humungous is available now.
www.thehellsetorchestra.co.uk
20
Out&About
BARS/GYMS/RESTAURANTS/SHOPS
GYM: FLEXIBLE FITNESS PACKAGE
What do you do if you have eleven
leisure centres and are competing
against flash private gyms? You beat
them at their own game of course.
You may have a bone to pick with the
Council, but you have to give them credit
for the Flexible Fitness package.
For just £24 per month, you can do as
much swimming, gymming, steaming
or jumping around to silly music as you
can possibly squeeze into your schedule.
That’s throughout their eleven leisure
centres, which include Beechdale,
Clifton, Elliott Durham, Harvey Hadden,
John Carroll, Ken Martin, Noel Street,
Nottingham Tennis Centre, Portland,
Southglade and Victoria. That pretty
much covers the whole of the city, if
you’re wondering.
The Flexible Fitness package provides
free entry to five core activities. So you
get unlimited access to each gym, each
swimming pool, 150 fitness and aerobic
classes, to the steam, sauna and spa at
Clifton and the Tennis Centre and to the
creche in each centre.
In what is now definitely a regular feature, LeftLion
whips out the credit card and wallows in the retail
wonderland that is Nottingham. Our correspondent,
looking nervously at the unopened creditcard bill
on the mantlepiece, is Cristina Chapman.
RESTAURANT: STONES CAFE
As a rule of thumb
I never eat pasta in a
restaurant. Having grown up with
Italian parentage, it has given rise to
the best of Italy’s cuisine and with a
number of demon cooks in the family, I
have super-sensitive pasta taste buds.
But sitting down for lunch in Stones
Café we had a feeling that the chefs
knew what they were doing.
When you compare that to some of the
other gyms, it’s pretty convincing.So get
down to your nearest leisure centre and
check out the facilities before shelling
out on expensive direct debits. You may
be pleasantly surprised by the facilities.
Call 0115 915 2726 or visit
www.flexiblefitness.org.uk
It may have been the serene atmosphere
and professional approach, the select
range of dishes on the menu or it may
have been the sense of togetherness.
Whatever it was, our intuition was right.
For a very reasonable £6, we were served
a respectable dish of perfectly-cooked
pasta, coated in just enough, not too
much, tasty sauce. The Parmesan came
separately, freshly grated, just as it
ought to.
olives, optimum French beans and really
nutty Jersey new potatoes. This was
crowned with a tuna steak cooked with
expertise.
Our other choice was a Nicoise salad,
which again surprised and surpassed
expectations. Along came a generous
portion of succulent green leaves, ripe
plum tomatoes, chunky cut cucumber,
Stones Café, 1 Weekday Cross, Lace
Market. 0115 941 7474
Stones Café was nominated Best New
Café 2005 in he Nottingham Restaurant
Awards. It deserves it. This was one of
the best meals we’ve had in Nottingham.
Their secret? Simplicity.
www.stonesdeli.co.uk
GALLERY: THE MALT CROSS
The Malt Cross is like the
Saatchi Gallery with alcohol. Granted,
there are no oil-filled rooms or
Damien Hirst sharks but it does play
host to some of the most exciting art,
media and music to come
to the city.
On the first Saturday afternoon of each
month, the St James’ street pub puts on
Enjoy The Ride. This is an audio-visual
feat of short films, live music and other
art. There you can meet people like
Malawi-born Samson Kambalu, who has
created Holyballism. He hopes to take his
art/philosophical phenomenon out to the
world with the end game of all the Holy
Books of the world being made into Holy
Balls “exercising and exorcising people
into everlasting happiness”.
He says he is exploring the death of
God and the meaning of life by covering
footballs with pages of the Bible, the
Koran, the Tanakh, etc. Conversation
with him is one of life’s gifts, as you can
imagine. And where else in Nottingham
could you have that kind of encounter?
The place also regularly hosts armchair
DJs and on the last Friday of every
month LeftLion Presents, a showcase
of Nottingham’s music talent. But you
should know that already, because
you’ve been down there, right?
In November, look out for Hydrophonics,
an event based around a water tank and
live Australian bands (what more could
you want?). Aside from all this exciting,
adventurous use of a pub, they also do
great tea and cake.
Brian Sewell would love the place, but
hate the art and Wayne Hemingway
would feel right at home.
Malt Cross, 14 St James Street
0115 941 1048
www.maltcross.com
Notts Going ON
COMING TO A CITY CENTRE NEAR YOU...
Why, why, why?
Delilah Fine Foods, Middle Pavement.
0115 948 4461
explains the publisher Snow Books. Set in
America’s Deep South, the novel tells the
story of two women who have to confront a
violent and secret past. One, Georgetown
Easy, is in search of her father. The other,
Helena Jones, is forced into discovering her
past by a great aunt. Apparently it’s really
rather good. So the least we can do is go
out and read it before we notch up another
year.
The land of ever-changing
shop fronts
21
Designer clothes shop Mili has also gone.
Clothes shopping is a veritable Nottingham
passion, but even we can’t stomach paying
£98 for a Stella McCartney t-shirt or £450
for a Chloe jacket. Still, we’ll miss the
stylish window displays, heavenly interior
and classy sales assistants.
Manhattan Gallery at the end of the Flying
Horse Arcade has also galloped off into the
sunset, replaced by a rather tacky-looking
flower and gift shop. In hindsight we’d
rather have the paintings and friendly New
Yorker back.
Going on thirty
Now I can see why you would reach a
certain age, have a few bob behind you,
have an interest in food and decide to
open up a deli. It’s crossed my mind when
my smiley corner shop man Mahmut tells
me he doesn’t stock hummous, couscous,
cream, peppers, spaghetti, onions…
But I don’t understand who really has a
burning need for Marmite biscuits, a sixpack of sampler fair-trade coffee beans or a
£15 bottle of Prosecco. Can such a business
be that profitable? Delilah on Middle
Pavement is the latest food speciality store
in the city and I really like the idea and look
of the shop. Lots of yummy-looking food. A
nice place to sit for coffee. A wide range of
interesting pots, packets, jars and bottles
from around the world.
But I can’t help thinking that Delilah is very
much like the high value, Lace Market flats
that overlook it. It looks fantastic, it makes
you want to go in and touch all the pretty
things, but on closer inspection you realise
that you wouldn’t want to pay that much
for something with little practical value
in your life. I just think we miss the point
of delis in this country. We stock them
full of rare items that you would only buy
someone as a Christmas present, only for it
to be knocking around in their cupboard for
six months. “Yeah, I really loved the black
linguine you bought me, but I’m just plain
out of the oak-dried shitake mushrooms
and pink tahini for the sauce.”
Did writers and composers used to achieve
great things at a young age because of
genius, focus or because they didn’t have
much of a chance at longevity? Emily
Bronte wrote Wuthering Heights at the age
of 28 but died just two years later. Mozart
had written hundreds of works by the
time he died aged just 35. Nottingham’s
own Byron started writing at 21 but
carped it at 36.
But we have so much more time to
achieve things now, about 90 years
if we’re lucky, and we seem to be so
much more impressed when people stop
procrastinating and reach great heights in
their twenties.
Think of the fuss we made of Zadie
Smith when she published her critically
acclaimed novel White Teeth, aged just
25. Now Nottingham writer Kat Pomfret
happily joins the hall of bright young
things. She wrote her debut novel in 2003,
aged 26. Published this year, it can now be
found in the ‘three-for-two’ bestseller offer
in Waterstones, Bridlesmith Gate.
Paradise Jazz “explores what happens in
a small town when big secrets collide”
Notts Landing #4:
Wollaton Park words: Clare Foyle
Bridlesmith Gate seems to be awash with
new shoe shops right now, probably filling
in gaps left by the musical chairs started
by Ted Baker. We’re a little concerned that,
not content with reshuffling his cabinet so
many times to make sure we lose track of
who’s in charge of what, Tony Blair is now
meddling with Nottingham’s shopping
scene. Although, we haven’t yet figured
out his underlying motives, we’d like him
to stop now as its destroying shopping
experiences. Nottingham women have
been left wandering the city for hours
because the shop they arranged to meet
up outside has moved. Maybe this is all
the work of the director of the cult film
Dark City? Or maybe Bridlesmith Gate is
actually Enid Blyton’s Faraway Tree. We
digress…
As we were saying, there are some nice
new shoe shops to visit. Ecco, Kate Kuba,
and Kurt Geiger are three of them. Visit
them before the pack is shuffled again.
Outpost trail
Over the past few weeks we have seen
the sad demise of Nottingham’s oldest
tobacconist Josiah Brown. After years of
supplying cancer sticks to Nottingham
punters, the last pipe has been smoked
on the place and now we will have to
somewhere else for our king size rizla’s and
Kendall light tobbaco.
Oops-a-daisy
In our whistlestop tour around the delights
of Nottingham city centre last issue, we
rushed you past the old swimwear and
dance shop explaining that it had been
turned into the city’s second branch of
Caffe Nero. You will have noted that the
new coffee shop is actually part of the
Costa chain and that the new Caffe Nero
is a few doors down on Wheeler Gate.
We apologise for the short-term memory
failure, for any confusion caused and for
any hopes we built up.
The suggestion that it was a good
alternative to Starbucks also provoked an
interesting debate about national chains
versus independent traders on the LeftLion
forum. As readers know, Out and About
values Nottingham’s small traders, just
as it does the chains and big businesses.
Each has a place in the city and we will
review each honestly, but fairly.
Visit the forum at
There’s a place in every city where you just want to be.
Whether you want to people-watch or think about the good
times, everyone’s place is different. Each issue, a member
of the LeftLion crew explains the spot they like best…
Wollaton Park was a constant presence
throughout my childhood. Visits often
coincided with school holidays, sledging
down the slopes of the hill if we were lucky
enough to get snow in the Christmas break
or picnics and sunbathing in the summer.
But the reason that Wollaton Park holds
a special place in my heart has little to
do with fun: I learnt many an important
life lesson in the impressive house and
grounds. It was in the hall that I saw a
penis in the flesh for the first time (albeit
attached to George, the stuffed Gorilla).
Despite his aggressive pose, George and
his laughably small appendage provoked
mirth rather than fear into my little mind.
Unfortunately, I tend to have a similar
reaction when I see men naked too.
Greater wisdom can be obtained from
the live exhibits at Wollaton. The worker
ants are spectacle to behold, providing a
lesson in motion about the importance of
community spirit and working towards a
greater good. The deer are also a highlight;
they taught me more about survival of
the fittest than any biology text book
ever could.
For me though, the creature at the park that
taught me the most was a humble donkey.
On one of my first visits to Wollaton, aged
three, I cockily approached the donkey in
the petting area of the park. Reports vary
as to what happened next but my mother
tells me that it was an unprovoked attack.
I still have the mental scars to prove it. I
learnt you should never mess with donkeys
and that a carrot is not an adequate
weapon of choice against these beasts.
Regardless of age, Wollaton Hall can still
educate and delight, just open your eyes,
embrace the diversity it has to offer and
become at one with nature. Just watch out
for rogue donkeys.
22
featured listing
clubs/theatre/live music/comedy/exhibitions
Nottingham
Voices
things people have said A Moot Point
on the leftlion forum
First Date In Nottingham
I’m taking a young lady out soon on a first date - she
seems quite nice. So I’m looking for something to do that
hasn’t got the formality of a dinner but isn’t as easy as just
a drink. Any ideas?
And
words: Amanda Young
Nottingham’s art scene is being stirred up by its underground
artists. Feel apprehensive and excited, but allow yourself this
drug. It’s a strange place but you’ll realise new things. Fresh new
Notts art gallery Moot is being launched with an exhibition by
International Contemporary Artist (and Grandson of a French
hunter), Nicolas Deshayes.
Wagamamas or that tapas place near Broadway are much
more relaxing than a stuck up restaurant. Or you could so
something a bit different - rock climbing or a row on’t lake.
Or just take her out and get lashed.
Jamie
Always, always La Tasca. Sit outside, drink sangria, have
some nibbles. Best first date ever. Trust me!
Linsey
Saltwater is easily the best date bar. Looks great, it will
well impress, great if its sunny but even at night they
have the heaters on outside. Trust me on this one.
Seismik Si
Book a bed at tantra for post-tapas relaxation, glass of
wine and then a dance. Especially Tuesday and Thursday
night ...live acoustic music. Crack on!
TGalley
What makes a good pub?
A selection of Nicolas’ work: (clockwise from left) Vernaculex, Monument, Rainbow, Taxadermous, Vernaculex detail
People, Music and Good selection of beer....
Windows 78
If i go to drink in a bar then the music has got to be just
loud enough so i can hear what’s going on but at a level
where I can chat to my mates, club is a whole different
matter play it loud and banging.
Silo
When I’m just out drinking music I have to give up on
good music as we head to the waterfront for the cheap
corona/sambuca and outdoor seating - thats a good thing
at any bar (easier to smoke).
Jamie
As long as I can get a pint of mild and a bag of nuts I’m
happy.
Steptoe
loud music is a pain if you’re with a group of people
(although a blessing in some situations)
theonelikethe
I regularly find i want to go somewhere for food but can’t
think of anywhere good, so settle for something not that
great. Inparticular, i find there is nowhere to get a decent
full English
Transit Mafia
A place needs a good few beers on tap, properly cold, I
don’t often have bottles so bothered wid’ that. You have
absolutely got to be able to sit down after a hard day at
work, why go out and pay to stand up?
Rez
Four pints of snakebite and a bag of pork scratchings
Lady Sadie
make your voice heard
Alongside the annual Now Festival,
October sees the launch of fresh
new Notts art gallery Moot, which is
being launched with an exhibition by
contemporary artist (and Grandson
of a French hunter), Nicolas
Deshayes.
The gallery have invited “energy”
and raw talent into this independent
space run by ex-Nottingham Trent
University Artists of the Stand
Assembly Studios.
Deshayes’ hyper-real sculptures
demonstrate that he is a brandspanking-new face on the UK Art
scene to watch out for. He takes the
surrounding space and subverts the
familiar, oscillating between Stanley
Krubic’s Sci-fi and the council estate
allotment. I caught up with Nik and
the Moot crew at the gallery space in
Sneinton.
Nik, tell me about the artwork you
are going to be showing at Moot.
I will be forming a landscape within
the gallery space. It will combine
four sculptural elements from my
recent degree show at Chelsea
College of Art, plus one new piece
I am creating now. I am casting a
plastic object used by road workers
for temporary signs, reproducing it
and using its multiples as building
blocks to create a mecano-like raft.
Sounds funny and strange! Your
work makes me think of Matthew
Barney’s Cremaster Cycle and its
weird reality.
I create hybrid sculptures that
gather multiple cultural and stylistic
references in a way that, in the
end, so much familiarity leads to
a strange sense of hyperreality.
“Taxidermaus,” a red polystyrene
composition of three pre-fabricated
pieces appearing like a simple
mouse head is a spin on the
taxidermy animal head trophies
found in stately homes. This piece
incorporates modernist geometry
with humorous spontaneity and
simplicity. Its impulsiveness
subverts the formality of modernist
aesthetic and works interestingly
alongside other contrastingly
highly crafted pieces. It creates an
interesting link with the formality of
the cast-aluminium boar hooves in
this piece, (he Shows me an image of
Vernaculex pictured above.)
How would you describe that?
Part climbing frame, part nautical
mast, daemons of the underworld
meets Rococo furniture! It is different
elements taken out of context and
assembled together. I was walking
through my local park and saw
this climbing frame uprooted out
of the ground. It had a big stump
of cement at its base and I found
its structure interesting in terms
of the redundancy of it’s function. I
no longer looked at it as a playingdevice but became more sensitive
to the design of its structure and its
absurdity out of context. So, I made
a piece based on this idea, using
vernacular industrial materials such
as rope, metal, cement, rubber and
aluminium. I asked my Grandfather
(the hunter in France) to look out
for some animal hooves I could cast
and incorporate into this sculpture. I
sought a wild boar hoof from him and
cast it in the aluminium. The silverfinish of the alumium references
the bluepeter-esque use of tin-foil
to convey what is ‘space-agey’.
This highlights the absurdity and
alienation of certain elements when
removed from their original context.
To appreciate your work then, I
need to crack the references?
I take reference from Sci-fi, art
history, notions of the monument,
and everyday stuff. By removing a
specific detail from a given object, it
can easily loose its sense of identity.
When using specific references,
I like to make their origin less
explicit in order to challenge the
viewers’ reading of the work. I’m
not interested in handing it out on
a plate. I like the audience to go
away, research and think about it.
There’s no code to understanding
my work, by noticing what’s around
you on a day-to-day basis, you will
automatically comprehend the
language.
You use the word ‘otherworldly’ to
describe your work, can you tell me
more?
Sure, I am interested in the notion of
retro-futurism, as in looking at them
in the past looking at us in 2005. It’s
about progress and science-fiction.
I play directly with this but I don’t
expect people to teleport to 3001
when looking at my work.
What was the decision to exhibit in
Nottingham?
I was invited here to show after
being hawked at my degree show
by Tom of Moot. I don’t know much
about the place, only the Robin
Hood cliché! Looking forward to
discovering it though…
The Moot Gallery launches on
15 October 2005.
www.mootgallery.org
listings...
exhibitions/theatre/comedy/live music/clubs
LeftLion tries to ensure all listings
are correct, but we cannot be held
responsible for any mistakes or changes.
Exhibitions
16/9 - 15/12
War, women and survival
Venue: Lakeside Arts centre
19/9 - 21/10
Outspeak
Venue: Surface Gallery
Price: Free
21/9 - 19/11
dis(comfort)
Venue: Angel Row Gallery
Price: Free
21/9 - 19/11
Knitwork
Price: Free
21/9 - 19/11
Adele Prince
Price: Free
Water and the Sacred
Price: Free
3-10 - 6/10
8/10 - 11/12
Landscapes, War scenes,
Portraits 1924-1950
Venue: Lakeside Arts centre
Nicholas Deshayes
Noble Island
Venue: Moots Gallery
Price: Free
Gallery Launch
Mid Life Crisis
Price: Free
Tristan & Yseult
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £7 - £24
Times: 7.45pm
Runs Until: 22/10
Northern Ballet Theatre: Dracula
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £10 - £29
Runs Until: 22/10
The Real Thing
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £8 - £23.50
Runs Until: 29/10
25/10 - 10/11
25/10 - 10/11
2D Open Show
Price: Free
Taking your brain to another dimension.
Theatre
1001 Nights Now
Venue: Playhouse
Price: £7 - £22
Runs Until: 15/10
fri 30/09
Mad About The Musicals
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £12.50 - £13.50
sat 01/10
mon 24/10
tue 25/10
Ramayana
Venue: Nottingham Arts Theatre
Price: £6 - £8 (NUS)
Times: 7.30pm
Runs Until: 27/10
Lyrically Deep
Venue: Playhouse
Price: £5
Times: 6.30pm
Living Pretty
Venue: Lace Market Theatre
Price: £10/£7/£5 (NUS)
Times: 8 PM
Disney On Ice
Venue: Nottingham Arena
Runs Until: 9/10
wed 05/10
Rebecca
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £8 - £23.50
Runs Until: 15/10
mon 10/10
An Evening With Mia Dolan
Price: £20
Times: 7.30pm
fri 28/10
Parallax Beat Brothers
Price: £4 - £6
Times: 7.30pm
It’s A Grand Night For Singing
Venue: Broadway
Price: £6.50 - £8
Runs Until: 15/10
tue 11/10
Retina Dance Company
Venue: Lakeside Arts Centre
Price: £10/£7/£5
Times: 8 PM
wed 12/10
Metamorphosis
Price: £7
Times: 7:30pm
Runs Until: 15/10
The opening night (Friday 14 October) features Creation Records founder Alan McGee’s
and his Rock N Roll Promz, at The Social. As a close friend of the NOW Festival, McGee
was only too happy to preview his new project in Nottingham for the opening night of the
festival. Alongside Alan, ex Beta Band frontman Steve Mason will be showcasing his new
project, King Biscuit Time and local DJs Badger and Otter will be whipping up the
dancefloor.
The cherry tomato on the top of this year’s salmagundi of visual splendour is the club night
and talk from Addictive TV, accredited as one of the world’s finest DJ, VJ and TV production ensembles, at Stealth and The Rescue Rooms (Saturday 15 October). Other stuff it
would be foolish to miss includes Curious’s Dry Clean Only, an intimate live art performance from co-author of The Guerrilla Guide to Performance Art, Helen Paris. Paris delves in
to the psyche of Nottinghamians for her performance to discover how plebs like us inform
and shape the branding and presentation of our city. Curious’s work has previously been
described by Lyn Gardener: “...the ordinariness of the domestic setting is transcended and
transformed into something quite extraordinary. Well worth a sniff.” The venue and location
will be revealed on booking.
Leicester based performance and theatre group Metro Boulot Dodo provide a wonderful opportunity to go and lark about in Wollaton Park amongst the back drop of autumnal
orange (as well as see some art of course…) from Friday 21 to Monday 24 October from
10am-4.30pm daily. Their bespoke interactive garden environment recreates a childlike
embodiment of the season of spring. MBD themselves describe Spring as a “kitsch, gaudy
and psychedelic” experience, and hot from it’s recent premier at the National Theatre its
riotous colour, sounds and smells are defiantly something to watch out for.
14-30 October 2005
Park
Venue: Playhouse
Price: £12.50 - £16
Times: 7.45pm
Runs Until: 29/10
www.beherenow.org.uk
wed 16/11
Black Milk
Price: £8/£7 (NUS)
Times: 7:30pm
Runs Until: 5/11
Thoroughly Modern Millie
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £10 - £30.50
Times: various
Runs Until: 12/11
Notes on Falling Leaves
Johan Johan
Price: £7
Times: 7.30pm
Runs Until: 19/11
fri 18/11
tue 01/11
Dance The Show
World Showcase
Price: £7.50 - £8
Times: 7pm (4pm on the 20th)
Runs Until: 20/11
Annie Get Your Gun
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £10 - £28.50
Runs Until: 26/11
Horror For Wimps
Price: £10/£7/£5 (NUS)
Times: 8 PM
Runs Until: 5/11
Greg Lake
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £21 - £23
Championing home grown
Midlands talent as well as that
of artists from further afield.
Events in this year examine
the conurbation and suburbs
through performance and
public participation as well
as more traditional modes of
documentation such as
drawing, painting and
photography.
Simon Poulter’s Index of Deprivation is presented at the Six Ways Community Centre in
Broxtowe from 16 - 30 October. This free exhibition of photographs and drawings and
interactive media focuses on the Nottingham district of Broxtowe, an area ripe for cultural
and social regeneration. Poulter is known for developing interdisciplinary media labs working with artists and organisations in the UK.
mon 31/10
thu 04/10
The Fox
Price: £10/£7/£5 (NUS)
Times: 8 PM
A play by Stephen Lowe inspired by a
short story by DH Lawrence.
Right Here, Right Now...
This year’s NOW
Festival looks set to hail
the greatness of art in
tue 18/10 our fair city.
wed 26/10
15/11 - 24/11
Matt Munro Jr
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £13 - £15
sun 16/10
Goldilocks and
The Three Bears
Price: £5.50 (NUS)
Times: 2pm and 7pm
mon 21/11
wed 23/11
Loser
Price: £10/£7/£5 (NUS)
Times: 8 PM
tue 8/11
tue
Titanic - The Musical
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £7.75 - £16.50
Runs Until: 19/11
Ever get that sinking feeling?
The Rise Of Robert
Price: £6 - £8
Times: 7.30pm
thu
Lest We Forget
Price: £5 - £7
Times: 7.30pm
24/11
Circus Of Horrors
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £14 - £22
15/11
A Man for All Seasons
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £8 - £23.50
Runs Until: 3/12
Weather defying dude...
01/10
sun 02/10
Just The Tonic
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £7 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Phil Nichol, Janice Fayre, Rob Rouse
Patrick
Venue:
Price:
Times:
thu 03/11
mon 07/11
sat
Chris Addison: Atomicity
Price: £14/£12/£5 (NUS)
Times: 8 PM
Runs Until: 1/10
Ardal O’Hanlon
Venue: Playhouse
Price: £17.50
Times: 7.30pm
Oh to be sure Ted...
WWE Smackdown
Price: £20 - £45
The Diary Of Anne Frank
Price: £6.50 - £8
Times: 7.30pm
Runs Until: 12/11
Comedy
Kielty
Playhouse
£14.50
7.30pm
sun 09/10
Just The Tonic
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £9 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Stewart Lee, Stephen Carlin
sun 09/10
Edinburgh & Beyond
Price: £14/£12 (NUS)
sun 16/10
mon 28/11
Just The Tonic
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £7 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Adam Hills, Howard Read, Dan Nightingale
Joe Pasquale
tue 18/10
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £13 - £15.50
New Faces winner with peg on toe.
listings...
Jo Brand
Venue: Playhouse
Price: £15
Times: 7.30pm
sun 23/10
Just The Tonic
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £7 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Simon Munnery as Alan Parker the
Urban, Mark Watson, Toby Foster
Mark Thomas
and Robert Newman
Venue: Playhouse
Price: £14.50
Times: 8pm
wed 26/10
27/10
Just The Tonic
sun 30/10
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £7 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Pierre Hollins, Die Clatterschenkenfieterm
aus, Spencer Brown, Darrell Martin
Just The Tonic
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £8 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Julia Morris, Lucy Porter
Lee Evans
Price: £25
Times: 8pm
Runs Until: 5/11
thu 03/11
fri 04/11
thu 10/11
sun 13/11
Just The Tonic
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £7 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Alan Carr, Pat Monahan, Rob Rouse
Little Britain
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £22.50 - £24.50
Runs Until: 15/11
mon 14/11
Rory Bremner
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £18.50 - £19.50
fri 18/11
Just The Tonic
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £7 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Jason Byrne
sun 20/11
sun 27/11
Just The Tonic
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £9 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Jeff Green, Tony Law, Dan Nightingale
Live Music
Queen Adreena
Venue: Rock City
Price: £8.50
Times: 7.30pm
The Telescopes
sun 02/10
Venue: The Social
Price: £6 adv
Fuxa Feat Sonic Boom (Spacemen 3)
Rolling Clones
Venue: Southbank Bar
mon 03/10
tue 04/10
Nottingham Youth
Orchestra
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £10
sat 01/10
The Hellset Orchestra
Venue: Rock City
Price: £3 adv
Times: 7pm - 10.15pm
Love Ends Disaster,
We Show Up On Radar
Martin Stephenson
Venue: Hotel Deux
With support from The Daintees,
Sweetbriar, Magic Car
wed 05/10
High Society presents
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £3 members / £5
Times: 9pm - 2am
Black Wire, Bullet Union, Highsoc dj’s
Herb Birds
fri 07/10
The Groovie Goulies
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £5 adv
Times: 9 pm- 1 am
The Spazzmatics, Dragster, Little Whores
on The Prairie
Bleeding Hearts
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £5
Times: 9 pm - 1 am
New Generation Superstars, Firebrand
Donnie Johnson
Venue: Running Horse
Tim Disney and The Delta Blues, Part of
the Goose Fringe Festival
wed 12/10
The Kull
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: 8.30pm - 12am (NUS)
Times: £4 / £3.50 NUS
The Kull (tbc), The Vapours (tbc), Computerman (tbc), TV-OD
mon 10/10
Open Mike Night
Part of the Goose Fringe Festival
Dio
Venue: Rock City
Price: £15
Times: 7.30pm
tue 11/10
The Rogers Sisters
Venue: The Social
Price: £5 adv
Times: 8pm
Kylesa
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £5
Times: 8.30 pm - 12 am
3 Stages of Pain, Army of Flying Robots,
Emergency Funeral
Scott Mathews
tue 11/10
Venue: Malt Cross Cafe Bar
Times: 8pm
Plus support, part of the Goose Fringe
Festival
Tom Vek
Venue: The Rescue Rooms
Price: £7.50 adv
Slaid Cleaves and Gurf Morlix
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £12 / £14
Times: 7.30pm
Part of the Goose Fair Fringe Festival,
which is an annual celebration of music
that takes place in support of goosey!
Brendan Benson
Venue: Rock City
Price: £11 adv
Times: 7.30pm
Tom Baxter
Price: £9
Crowell
The Rescue Rooms
£14adv / £16
Doors 7.30pm
sun 09/10
Goldfrapp
Venue: Rock City
Price: £15
thu 06/10
Arcturus
Venue: Rock City
Suppoert from Red Harvest
Rodney
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Fingathing
Venue: Rescue Rooms
Price: £8 adv (NUS)
Times: 7.30 pm
Fingathing,
Cappo,
Johnny Crump,
Dubfella/Windows78
It’s a Grand Night For Singing
Price: £6.50 - £8
Times: 7.30 pm
Celebration of Richard Rodgers Music.
Runs Until: 15/10
No Hope & Escaping Skies
Venue: Junktion 7
Times: 8.30pm - 12am
Hush The Many
Venue: Bunkers Hill
Price: £4 adv £5 otd
Times: 7.45pm
Sweetbriar, Stick & Stone
RoadHouse
Price: £5
Aiden & The Hurt Process
Venue: Rock City
Price: £10 adv
Thomas Leeb + Support
Price: £5
Arcurs
Venue: Rock City
Price: £12 adv
Times: 7.30pm
07/10
Fab4
Thomas Leeb
Venue: The Malt Cross
Support: Jim Croft and Cyril
The Paddingtons
Venue: Rescue Rooms
Price: £7.50 adv
Bumble Bits
fri
Times: 8pm
Nonsense Opera - Steve Crow
Caribou & Russian Futurists
Venue: The Social
Price: £8 adv
Damn You!
Venue: Bunkers Hill Inn
Elephant Micah
Multi Purpose Chemical
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £3.50
Just The Tonic
sun 06/11
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £7 (NUS)
Times: 8pm
Jason Manford, Andy Zaltzman, Josie Long
Ross Noble: Randomist
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £18
Truth
Heroes of Switzerland
Venue: The Social
thu
John Hegley
Price: £14/£12/£5 (NUS)
Runs Until: 28/10
sat 01/10
Sweet Seduction
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £4
Times: 9pm - 1am
Student Gig
Venue: Junktion 7
The Autodisko (tbc), plus support
Richmond Fontaine
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £10 / £12
Times: 7.30pm
With the Amazing Pilots (USA)
Open Mike Night
Venue: The Lion Inn
Times: 8pm
The Boothill Toe Tappers, Part of The
Goose Fringe Festival
Colin Staples Blues Jam
DIY Poets
Venue: Wax Cafe
Times: 7.30pm
Changing Rhymes, Part of the Goose
Fringe Festival
Wild Child
Price: £10 adv
thu 13/10
Dandi Wind
Venue: The Social
Price: £3 adv
As part of Liars Club On Wheels - UK Tour
John Peel Day
Venue: Orange Tree
Times: 8pm - 12am
*Special John Peel
Day Celebration*,
Open Mic Slots
and The Magic Heroes
John Peel Day
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £4
Chemistry Experiment, Champion
Kickboxer, ST Joan, Nutron Stars
Gina Villalobos
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £9 / £11
Times: 7.30pm
Support from The Believers (USA)
Nu Blues Night
Price: £5
Richie Muir
The National
Venue: The Social
Price: £8 adv
fri 14/10
listings...
65 Days of Static
fri
Venue: The Social
Price: £6 adv
With support from Youth Movie
Soundtrack Strategies
14/10
Laura Viers
Price: £8 adv
Frankie Goes To Hollywood
Venue: Rock City
Price: £15 adv
Now Festival Opening Event
Venue: The Social
Price: £6 adv
Alan McGee’s Rock N Roll Promz, plus
King Biscuit Time & DJ’s Badger & Otter
Mark Mulcahy (USA)
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £8 / £10
Times: 7.30pm
Lacerated and Side Project
Venue: The Old Angel
Price: £5 / £3
Times: 8pm
Harry and The Last Pedestrians
Venue: The Lion Inn
Times: 8pm
Slimline
Price: £5
and Papas Blues
Walter Trout
Price: £15 adv
Little Freddie King (USA)
Price: £10
Dogs D’Amour
Venue: Rock City
Price: £12.50
Times: 7.30pm
Performance
Towers Of London
Venue: Rock City
Price: £6
Saxon
Venue: Rock City
Price: £15 adv
Times: 7.30pm
sat 15/10
mon 17/10
tue 18/10
Beck Goldsmith
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £tbc
Jonathan Rice
Venue: The Social
Price: £5
Times: 8pm
wed 19/10
The Kills
Price: £9 adv
Chelsea
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £7 Advance / £8.50 Door
Engineers
Price: £7.50 adv
The Robocop Kraus
Venue: The Social
Price: £4 adv
The Fight
Venue: Rock City
Price: £5 adv
Times: 7.30pm
thu 20/10
Steve Harley & Cockney Rebel
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £17.50
The Magic Numbers
Venue: Rock City
Price: £10 adv
Times: 7pm
Phinius Gage
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £2.50 adv
Times: 9 pm
Tolerance, Red As Monkey, Lift Off! DJ
Leepea, Phinius Gage
John Renbourn and Johnny Dickenson
Venue: Hotel Deux
Pleated Lemon, Bogus Bob, The Last
Pedestrians
Systemyk
Venue: The Old Angel
Price: £5 / £3
Times: 8pm
and Evil Scarecrow
The Mad, The Bad and the Dangerous
Tour
Price: £16.50 adv
The Hamsters, Wilco Johnson, John Otway
LeftLion Live
Venue: Orange Tree
Times: 8.30pm
Lee Rickers
The Recovery
3 Way Dance
Venue: The Rig
Price: £6 adv
The Freaks Union & The Mingers
Splint
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £4
Times: 8.30pm - Midnight
Splint, Flyswatter (Germany) – Emo /
punk
TreeBeard
Venue: The Lion Inn
Times: 8pm
Herb Birds
The John O’Leary Band
Price: £6
Off The Wall
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £13.50- £15
Pink Floyd Tribute Band
Funky Way
sun 16/10
Junktion 7 Presents
fri 21/10
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £5 Adv / £6 Door
Times: 9pm - 1am
Assert, John Holmes (tbc), A new Way To
Trust, Burning Skies (Alvaran)
Joe Strange
The Nottingham singer-songwriter will
be plying his brand of country and folk
in support of his Angel Row album. See
interview on page 11.
Hugh Cornwall
Venue: Cabaret
Price: £10 / £12
Times: 7.30pm
Derek Acorah
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £14.50 - £15.50
Roy De Wired
Bloc Party
Venue: Rock City
Price: £13.50
Times: 7.30pm
Current flavour of
the month arrive
in Notts to play at
‘the citeh!’
sun 16/10
Joe Brown and Marty Wilde
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £15.50 - £19.50
Neon Heights
Price: £3
Times: 8pm
Entombed
Venue: Rock City
Price: £9
Times: 7.30pm
Joan Armatrading
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £22.50
fri 21/10
Hard-Fi
Price: £8.50 adv
El Presidente
Venue: Nottingham Trent University Union
Price: £4 adv (NUS)
Times: 9pm - 2am
With Support from The Upper Room
sat 22/10
Spunge
thu 27/10
Venue: Rock City
Price: £10 adv
Times: 6.30pm
Spunge , Fastlane, Route 215, Sadie’s Doll
Chuck Prophet & The Mission Express
Venue: Rock City
Price: £12 adv
The Organ
Venue: The Social
Price: £4 adv
Times: 9pm - 2am
Richie Muir
Vampires Rock
Price: £10 - £20
Times: 7.30pm
Echo And The Bunnymen
Price: £17.50 adv
Sticky Morales
fri 28/10
Krebstar Records Presents
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: Tickets £8.50
Times: 5.30pm - Midnight
sun 23/10
LeftLion Presents...
Times: 8pm - 11pm
Left of The Dealer and Team Hughes
Turin Brakes
Venue: Rock City
Price: £15 adv
mon 24/10
Test Icicles
Venue: The Social
Price: £6 adv
Times: 7pm - 10pm
Bullet For My Valantine
Venue: Rock City
Price: £10 adv
Times: 7pm
tue 25/10
Michael Bolton
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £37.50
wed 26/10
Static Party Presents
Venue: Junktion 7
Price: £3 Members
Times: 9pm - 1am
The DT’S (Bellingham, WA) , Gods Chosen Dealers (Nottingham)
Richie Muir
KMFDM
Price: £12.50 adv
KT Tunstall
Venue: Rock City
Price: £13.50 adv
Great Lake Swimmers
Venue: The Social
Price: £5 adv
Times: 7pm - 10pm
Jamie Cullum
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £27.50
mon 31/10
listings...
Halloween Gig
mon
Venue: Junktion 7
Times: 8.30pm - midnight
Supernight
Venue: The Social
Price: £3
Times: 8pm
31/10
tue 01/11
3 Way Dance
Venue: Rock City
Price: £6 adv
No Comply , Anyway , The Mercury League
Four Seasons By Candlelight
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £15 - £21
Times: 7.30pm
Kinski
thu
Price: £5 adv
Music For One, Bela Emerson
03/11
Blackbud
Venue: The Social
Price: £5 adv
Times: 7pm - 10pm
fri 04/11
Bjorn Again
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £15 - £17
sat 05/11
Rock Steady
sun 06/11
Rolling Clones
mon
Buck 65
Price: £8 adv
07/11
tue 08/11
Four Tet
Venue: Rock City
Price: £9.50 adv
With support from Explosions in the Sky
Richie Muir
wed 09/11
thu 10/11
The Red Chord + Bury Your Dead
Venue: Rock City
Price: £8 adv
Times: 7pm
The Illegal Eagles
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £15.50
fri 11/11
The Decemberists
Price: £8 adv
tue 15/11
Starsailor
Venue: Rock City
Price: £16.50 adv
Herb Birds
thu 17/11
Ezio
Price: £10 adv
fri 18/11
sat 19/11
Open Mic
Venue: The Orange Tree
Times: 8pm - 12am
Open mic night at what is now the home
of our second monthly live event LeftLion
Live (third Thursday of the month).
Truth
The Bravery
Venue: Rock City
Price: £15 adv
Times: 7pm
sun 20/11
sat 12/11
The New School Of Rock Tour
Venue: Rock City
Price: £3 adv
Times: 7.30pm
The Answer, The Sound Explosion,
Tokyo Dragons
Nottingham Harmonic Society Chorus
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £5 - £16.50
Belshazzar’s Feast
Firefest II
Venue: Rock City
Price: £40
Times: 12pm
House Of Lords and more
Franz Ferdinand
mon 28/11
Price: £21.50
With support from The Rakes and The
Editors
Tony Christie
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £20 - £22.50
Times: 7.30pm
tue 29/11
Jools Holland
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £27
wed 30/11
sat 01/10
Pure Filth
Style: Techno, DnB, Funky House
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £5
Times: 10pm - late
mon 03/10
2 Many DJ’s
Venue: Stealth
Price: £15 adv
Times: 7pm - 2am
Radio Soulwax Tour, Soulwax (Nightversions), 2 Many DJs, Riotous Rockers
Seiji and Guest MC
(Bugz In the Attic)
Venue: Evasion
Price: £3 / motd
Roy De Wired
mon 21/11
Alkaline Trio
Venue: Rock City
Price: £14
Times: 7.30pm
22/11
Forward Russia
Venue: The Social
Price: £5 adv
Times: 8pm
The Sound Carriers
Venue: The Social
Price: £5
Times: 8pm
LeftLion Presents...
fri
Times: 8pm - 11pm
Punish The Atom and Bambino
25/11
wed 05/10
thu 06/10
Liquid Funkt
Style: Drum and Bass
Venue: Image Bar
Times: 7pm - 11pm
Random Guy, Rema D, Timmy Hands,
Weazal Man, Groove Distortion
Dogma Presents
Venue: Dogma
Price: Free
Times: 9pm – 2am
Red Rack’em
Diwali Gala
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £5
The Everly Brothers
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £40 - £50
sat 26/11
Rappers Delight
Style: HipHop
Venue: The Social
Price: £2
Times: 10pm - 2am
thu 06/10
fri 07/10
Spectrum
Style: Breaks
Venue: Stealth
Times: 10pm - 3.30am
Giles Peterson, Electric Souls Soundsystem, Earl Zinger, Krafty Kuts, Pete Jordan
Basement Boogaloo Presents: Greg Wilson, Unabombers, Ed Cotton & Nick Shaw
Hupendi Muziki Wangu vs Solid State
Venue: Bar None
Price: Free
Times: 10pm - 2am
Focus
Style: Drum and Bass, Deep House
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £6 Nus / £6 B4 11pm / £8 after
Times: 10pm - late
Nicky Blackmarket & Mc $pyda, Jaydan &
Disfunktion, Kronic & Apocalypse
wed 12/10
Detonate - Freshers Party
Style: Drum and Bass, HipHop
Venue: Nottingham Trent University Union
Price: £8 adv
Times: 9-2am
Clubs
LeftLion Live
Venue: The Orange Tree
The Joe Strange Band and Rapunzel Map
Richie Muir
Gorgoroth
Venue: Rock City
Price: £12 adv
Times: 7.30pm
With support from1349
Glenn Tilbrook and The Fluffers
Price: £12.50 adv
mon 14/11
tue
Carmen
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £21 - £31.50
Ellen Kent and Opera International
Present Bizet’s Carmen
John Cooper Clarke
Price: £12 adv
Sticky Morales
The Damned
Venue: Rock City
Price: £14 adv
Times: 7.30pm
Kiss Expo III
Venue: Rescue Rms
Price: £15 adv
Times: 2pm-9pm
The Tubes
Price: £14 adv
Keith James
Price: £10 adv
A Feast Of Gilbert and Sullivan
Venue: Royal Centre
Price: £12.50 - £17.50
Bob Dylan
Price: £30-£35
The man who
fused folk and
rock music comes
to Nottingham.
Architecture In Helsinki
Kubb
Venue: Rock City
Price: £7 adv
Times: 7.30pm
sun 13/11
Buster
Motorhead
Venue: Rock City
Price: £21.50
Times: 7.30pm
support from In Flames
Arab Strap
Venue: The Social
Price: £8 adv
The Bluetones
Price: £12.50 adv
Highness Soundsystem
Style: Reggae, Dub
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £5
Times: 10pm - late
Dogma Presents
Venue: Dogma
Price: Free
Times: 9pm – 2am
Bonobo (Ninja Tune)
Psycle
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Trance, Breaks
BluePrint
£5
10pm - late
thu 13/10
sat 15/10
sun 16/10
Alice Russell FT. TM Juke
Style: HipHop
Venue: Stealth
Price: £8 adv
Times: 7.30 pm
Alice Russell FT. TM Juke, Kids In Tracksuits, Dubfella, Windows78
wed 19/10
Detonate - Next Level 05
Style: Drum and Bass, HipHop, Breaks
Venue: Rock City
Price: £17.50 adv
Times: 8-3am
Scratch Perverts feat Dynamite MC, Fabio
and Grooverider b2b with MC GQ
DJ Zinc, Jenna G feat Dynamite MC, DJ
Friction with SP MC & Eksman, Pendulum, MC $pyda, Calibre, MC Fats,
Transit Mafia, Grandmaster Flash, Jeru
The Damaja, DJ Vadim Presents: One
Self feat DJ Woody, Yara Bravo, Blu Rum,
Petebox, MistaJam, Santero, Detail, The
Freestylers, DJ Deekline, MC Darrison,
Pete Jordan, Problem Child
listings...
Cult
wed 19/10
Venue: Wax Cafe
Price: Free
Times: 9pm - 2am
Buddha Palm, Miss OneDrop, Mr Shifter, JPJ
Andi Smith
Venue: Evasion
Price: £3 / motd
Dogma Presents
Venue: Dogma
Price: Free
Times: 9pm – 2am
Crazy Penis
thu 20/10
fri 21/10
Kombination Funk
Style: Drum and Bass, Techno
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £6
Times: 10pm - late
Cult
sat
Venue: Wax Cafe
Price: Free
Times: 9pm - 2am
CULT’s 1st Birthday!!
10/10 LIVE!, Johnny Crump, Ryo,
Windows 78, Ligre
22/10
Mr Scruff
wed 26/10
Venue: Rock City
Price: £10 adv
Times: 9pm - 2am
Hello Dottingham… Keep it Ian Beale.
Ade Fenton (Atomic Jam)
Venue: Evasion
Price: £3
Times: 10pm – late
Dogma Presents
Venue: Dogma
Price: Free
Times: 9pm – 2am
Quantic (Tru Thoughts)
thu 27/10
Skool of Beatz
Style: Hip Hop, Funk, Breakz
Venue: Moog
Demo
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £5
Times: 10pm - late
sat 29/10
Aaron Ross
Venue: Evasion
Price: £3
Times: 10pm - late
wed 02/11
thu 03/11
Simon DK
Venue: Evasion
Price: £3 / motd
wed 09/11
Dogma Presents
thu 10/11
Venue: Dogma
Price: Free
Times: 9pm – 2am
Dan Greenpeace (Antidote Records)
wed 16/11
Mark Rae
Style: Breaks, HipHop, Funk
Venue: Evasion
Price: £3 adv motd
Dogma Presents
Venue: Dogma
Price: Free
Times: 9pm – 2am
A Skillz (Finger Lickin)
thu 17/11
fri 18/11
Kombination Funk
Style: Drum and Bass, Techno
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £6
Nicky Blackmarket
Venue: Evasion
Price: £3 / motd
wed 23/11
Dogma Presents
thu
Venue: Dogma
Price: Free
Times: 9pm – 2am
Russ Porter (Limp Twins/QSO)
Skool of Beatz
Style: Hiphop, Funk, Breakz
Venue: Moog
Stone Soup Project Showcase
Demo
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £5
Times: 10pm - late
Nicky G & Davey Boy
Venue: Evasion
Price: £3 / motd
sat 26/11
wed 30/11
Camouflage
Price: £7
Sway, Lazy Habits, Karizma, T-Cutt/Swiz,
Hosted By Blugrass
Mondays
Weekly Nights
Liquid Funkt
Venue: Image Bar
Price: Free
Times: 7pm - 11pm
Random Guy, Rema D, Timmy Hands,
Weazal Man, Groove Distortion
Motherfunker
Style: Funk, Pop, Indy
Venue: The Cookie Club
Price: £1 b4 11pm
Times: 10.30 - 2am
Highness Soundsystem
Style: Reggae, Dub
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £5
Times: 10pm - late
Tuesdays @ The Market Bar
Style: Disco, RnB
Venue: The Market Bar
Price: £4 (NUS)
Times: 9pm - 2.30am
Rappers Delight
Style: HipHop
Venue: The Social
Price: £2
Times: 10pm - 2am
Wednesdays
Spectrum
Style: Breaks
Venue: Stealth
Price: £tbc
Times: 10pm - 3.30am
fri 04/11
24/11
Tuesdays
Funk Stole Your Mama
Style: Funk
Venue: Synergy
Price: £4.50 (NUS)
The Mood Indigo Trio
Venue: Bluu
Price: Free
The Big Wednesday
Style: Alternative, Rock, Pop
Venue: Cookie Club (The)
Price: £2.50 (NUS)
Times: 10.30 - 2am
Funktion
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £5
Times: 10pm - late
Sappo (1xtra) 2 Hour set.
sat 05/11
Pure Filth
Style:
Techno, Drum and Bass, Funky House
Venue: BluePrint
Price: £5
Times: 10pm - late
Ritmo With Leon Moran
Style: Funky House, Disco, Breaks
Venue: Bar Humbug
Price: Free
Times: 8pm - 1am
Thursdays
Mirrorball
Style: RnB, Disco, Funk
Venue: Snug
Times: 10pm - 3am
Tuned
Style: Indy, Alternative, Pop
Venue: Rock City
Price: £3.50 / £4 (NUS)
Dusk
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
HipHop, Soul
Snug
£4 (NUS)
10pm - 3am
Club NME
Style: Rock, Indy, Alternative
Venue: Stealth
Generation
Style: Sixties
Venue: Cookie Club (The)
Price: £2.50 (NUS)
Fridays
Style:
Price:
Times:
@ Market Bar
Breaks, House, Disco
£4 (NUS)
9pm - 3am
Audio
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Funk, Soul, Disco
Snug
£5 (£3 b4 10.30pm) (NUS)
10pm - 3am
Atomic
Style:
Venue:
Price:
Times:
Eighties, Nineties
Cookie Club (The)
£4 (NUS)
10.30pm - 2am
Saturdays
Stealth
Venue:
Price:
Times:
vs Rescued
Stealth
Free b4 10.15pm £5 after
5pm - 4am
Saturdays @ The Market Bar
Style: Funky House
Price: £5
Times: 9pm - 2.30am
Funktion
Venue: Synergy
Price: Free
Stylus
Style: Funky House, Funk
Venue: Snug
Price: £3 - £6
Fridays
Rise and Shine / Funk U
Style: Indy, Alternative, Disco, Soul
Price: £5 (NUS)
Soul Buggin with DJ Beane
Style: Folk, Soul, Disco
Venue: Bar Humbug
Times: 8pm - 1am
Sabotage
Style: Eighties, Nineties
Price: £4 (NUS)
Times: 10.30 - 2am
Love Shack
Style: Eighties
Venue: Rock City
Lovezoo
Style: House, Funky House
Venue: The Lost Weekend
Price: £5
Times: 10pm - 3am
Distortion
Style: Rock, Indy, Alternative
Venue: Rock City
Price: £5 (NUS)
Times: 9pm - 2.30am
.co.uk
/shop
Attention: Artists of Nottingham.
we want to sell your soul stuff!
the leftlion online shop will soon be relaunched.
we currently sell cd’s, books, photos and t-shirts,
but we may be interested in other things too. We’re
looking to gather a variety of local artwork, music,
craft, clothing and other local creative produce.
we offer sale or return and a decent commison
rate (as good as we’ve found in the city so far).
If you’re interested email us on [email protected]
with a few sample images or tracks and the kind
of price you are looking to sell at and we’ll
let you know whether we’re interested.
This issue all the answers are places where you can buy a drink in Nottingham.
If you’re struggling then you can find all the answers (and how to get to
them) at leftlion.co.uk/bars. If you get them all then email your answers to
[email protected] to claim a special misery prize.
Across
Down
1. This bar may bring a tear (9)
5. Sounds like the place to go and cook a Polish girl
(8)
6. Where a number of the team drink (6)
9. The bar Alan chose and you are involved too
(anag) (10)
11. Bar that’s heavy in the south-east (5)
12. Where you find a homeless snail and salad (4,3,7)
16. This pub won’t let go of it’s insects (3, 9)
18. Synth bar (4)
19. “Ken,” Mary sob (anag) (5, 6)
22. Bar with space to exist (6, 4)
23. You need to be chic to drink here (7)
24. Place where you can find a communist cat (3, 4)
25. This pub could be said to unger (6)
2. Ye all face this veggie café bar (anag) (5, 4)
3. Karaoke bar that stays underground (8)
4. Looks around a horse at this pub (8)
7. Sounds like you may have to wait to get in here
(1, 6)
8. Could be ‘Le Fence Lodge’ (anag) (6, 6)
10. Place to get a big jug of beer and an instrument
(7, 3, 5)
13. Where she got her bun skill (anag) (7, 4)
14. This bar is revolting (10)
15. This pub rules or governs (anag) (9)
17. Where the mad go to drink (anag) (5)
20. Is this old pub a clanger? (4, 3)
21. Ban a mangled sari (3, 4)
answers for previous Nottswords can be found at www.leftlion.co.uk/nottsword
29
30
Aries (March 20 - April 20)
Libra (September 23 - October 23)
Time does not really exist. Humans made it up to make sense of their place in the
world. The watch on your wrist remains inconsistent with the happenings inside your
head. When will you realise that periodical pigeonholes are nothing to hold you. None
of it is real…
How drunk do you think you can get in twenty-five minutes? Go on, give it a go. If
you’re not already stocked up, you can hold the stopwatch until you get back from
Thresher. I managed five pints, a bottle of red and a quart of Whisky before I started to
black out. My wife says she is ‘disappointed’ in me.
Taurus (April 20 - May 21)
Scorpio (October 23 - November 23)
If I was a gambling man (which I most certainly am) then I’d put money on this being
your lucky day. Everything is set right for you and the sun will shine where you walk.
Avoid the maniacal evil clown desperately trying to hurt you wherever you go and it
will all pass by like clockwork.
I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder
of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those
moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.
Gemini (May 21 - June 21)
Congratulations. You are the 1,000,000,000th reader of this Horrorscope. You have won
our special prize. To claim it, stop reading this paper immediately, head down to your
local newsagent and tell him you want to talk to Peter Pointer. If he doesn’t comply
then you can whistle.
Cancer (June 21 - July 23)
I never was big on pets, but a bit of company around the house would do you good. No
small yappy dogs or I won’t come and visit. Also you want something clean. Cats are
okay, apart from being smug insolent little long armed hairy pigs. Maybe a Chinchilla?
Leo (July 23 - August 23)
To remove excessive crayon stains from your walls spray them with WD-40, then
gently wipe. If the mark is particularly stubborn, sprinkle a little baking soda on a
damp sponge and gently rub in a circular motion. If the colour remains, wet a cloth
with bleach and wipe until your fingers bleed.
Virgo (August 23 - September 23)
Phone in sick tomorow. You deserve a day off. You can catch up with that paperwork on
your desk tomorrow or next week or never. Try on some new clothes, put on that DVD
you bought and practice some fancy dancing. You saw what it did for that rasclaat
Patrick Swayze.
Sagittarius (22 - December 22)
The world is a fucking crazy place. Hopping up from one branch to another trying to
climb higher and higher until you can climb no more. If you can’t keep with the pace
then take a break hombre. Hyperventilated thoughts inspire constipated bowels.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
Let everyone forget troubles. Life is ongoing now. Offset unusually repugnant stains.
Talk yourself less, egotist. I see less energy generally everywhere. Night dawns across
recent years.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 19)
Darkness surrounds you and you know it. Your mask of uncertainty is complete. Take
advantage of it, and soak it all in. Write out what you’re feeling in fire across your
neighbours garden, or just enjoy relaxing in the soft, dark and endless corridors of your
rabid mind. Kiwi fruits are good for vitamin C.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
Truthfully, some things are worth fighting for and some are not. Part of the trick in life
is wising up to which is which. Make up your mind what to let go and do it. Make sure,
however, your decisions are based on real preferences rather than lethargy. Your dinner
is in the dog!
Local
Transpo
Special!rt
Grate Misstakes in Cultural Histroy
Nottingham City Transport
Number of buses in Nottingham city
312
Do they give change?
No
Average lateness of bus (if it turns up
Time lost waiting behind old people
in queue (per journey)
Youths causing trouble at back of bus
#07: June 1215 - King John signs the Magnum PI Carta
at all)
Trent Barton Buses
Yes
Do they give change?
up at all)
1.4 mins
it turns
Average lateness of bus (if
1.5 mins
old people
Time lost waiting behind
in queue (per journey)
(per journey)
3.7
144
m city
Number of buses in Nottingha
back
Youths causing trouble at
2.2 mins
1.35 mins
of bus (per journey)
7.7
Ask your university for details or visit www.connectednottingham.org.uk
City Centre Venues
Breeze Bar
Canalhouse Bar & restaurant
Fresh
The Lion Inn
The Plough
Bunkers Hill Inn
Cast
The Grove
Malt Cross
The Stage
The Gatehouse
Bag o’ Nails
C.K.’s
The Johnson Arms
Mayfields Wine Bar
Saltwater
Ye Olde Trip to Jerusalem
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
The Bar Cafe
Frog & Onion
Kean’s Head
The Newcastle
Pitcher & Piano
Sausage
Queen’s Medical Centre
Johnson Arms
Atrium Cafe
Exchange Cafe
The Plough
The Lion Inn
Frog and Onion
Bag O’Nails
The Grove
Cast
Gatehouse
NTU City Campus
The Stage
Saltwater
Malt Cross
Mayfields Wine Bar
Ye Olde Trip To Jerusalem
Canalhouse Bar
Pitcher & Piano
Kean’s Head
Breeze Bar
Fresh
Bunkers Hill Inn
The Newcastle
CK’s
Sausage
Connected Nottingham - working towards making Nottingham a truly connected city.

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