social media and internet safety

PARENT
GUIDE
SOCIAL
MEDIA
AND
INTERNET
SAFETY
K-12 PARENT GUIDE
PARENT’S GUIDE TO SOCIAL
MEDIA AND INTERNET SAFETY
“FOR THE MOST PART, THE INTERNET IS A REWARDING PLACE
FOR BOTH KIDS AND TEENS, BUT THE POTENTIAL RISKS TO
THEIR PRIVACY AND PERSONAL SAFETY ARE REAL. BEING AWARE
OF THE RISKS AND ENGAGING WITH YOUR CHILDREN ABOUT
SAFETY ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS YOU CAN DO TO
KEEP YOUR FAMILY SAFER ONLINE.”
– AMERICAN ACADEMY OF PEDIATRICS (AAP), SAFETYNET WEBSITE
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Social Media and Internet Safety K-12 Parent Guide. Copyright 2013.
All rights reserved.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
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Goal of this Guide
3
How Social Media Affects The Role of Parents
5
Social Media Defined
5
Sites Parents Should Learn First
9
Privacy Settings and Identity Protection
9
Additional Safety Tips for Parents
11Social Networking: How Much “Screen Time” is Too Much?
12 Best Age for Cell Phone?
13 “Netiquette”
13 Texting and “Sexting”
15 Digital Cheating
15 Cyberbullying
16 Parents – The First Line of Defense
18 Digital Citizenship: Rules for Online Living
19 Sources and Resources
GOAL OF THIS GUIDE
Welcome to the Guide on Social Media and Digital Citizenship.
This guide is designed to empower parents with information
and awareness of how kids today use the Internet, text on
their phones and engage with people on social media sites
such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. You’ll learn about
online “netiquette;” popular sites that adolescents and teens
visit, and how to help protect your children from online
dangers such as cyberbullying and ethical issues such as
digital cheating. This guide will also offer parents expert
strategies for setting boundaries regarding the amount of
time kids spend online.
HOW SOCIAL MEDIA
AFFECTS THE ROLE OF PARENTS
Our children are growing up in a world where the Internet and online communication are
part of everyday life. According to a nationwide survey of parents conducted by the
Learning First Alliance and published in Education Week, 51 percent of all students carry a
smartphone to school by the time they enter high school, and 25 percent of students have
a cell phone and a laptop or tablet. While digital technology offers many advantages and
educational benefits, 62 percent of parents surveyed believe mobile devices can be a
distraction.
It has always been the role of parents to monitor the activities of their children, to teach them
proper behavior, and to help ensure their safety. However, the reality of raising children in
today’s electronic era makes it much more difficult for parents to know with whom their kids
are talking, who they are “liking” on Facebook, what websites their kids are reading, which
videos they are watching, and when and how often they are online.
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As this guide helps parents navigate the world of social media, it is important to remember
it is an ever-changing arena, with new sites, new rules and new information streaming
moment by moment. In addition, as young people are engaging in more online activity
more often, we have begun to see some of the harmful effects and risks, requiring parents
to become better informed, more aware and more vigilant. Schools are doing their part
to boost parents’ digital literacy through newsletters and parent meetings, and to protect
children from potentially harmful websites with strict rules and “firewalls.” Governmental
legislation, including the Protecting Children in the 21st Century Act and the Children’s
Internet Protection Act (CIPA), address concerns, privacy issues and protective measures
regarding children’s access to obscene or harmful content via the Internet. The legislation
requires states and schools to create Internet safety policies and to educate minors about
“appropriate online behavior.”
While parents may feel intimidated by their limited Internet or social media knowledge,
remember the power of parental influence. For kids to have the safest use of the Internet,
parents much teach them responsible use of the Internet. One of the key aspects for parents
to understand before their kids get online is the longevity and accessibility of online content:
everything on the Internet can be seen by a vast, invisible audience of millions. Further,
whenever anyone visits a website or uses a mobile application, information about that person’s online activity (such as product searches) is automatically collected by search engines;
search engines in turn share that information with retailers, for example. This means there
really is no such thing as online privacy.
A great first step for parents learning about social media is to engage in hands-on experience with popular social media sites. Parents can create their own Facebook and Twitter
pages; visit popular teen sites such as Instagram and YouTube, and try out mobile phone
apps and texting. As parents become familiar with how the digital world works, they should
share safety information with their children and teens and supervise their online activities.
Remember that while today’s Internet generation may be more digitally experienced than
their parents, when it comes to social media, our children’s lack of life experience can quickly
get them into trouble. Parents have foresight, hindsight and the maturity to guide and help
protect children. Talk to your kids about potential risks, and consider the safety rules and
screen time limits that you’ll learn more about in this guide.
Sussman Sales in Partnership with Connect with Kids Education Network 4
PARENT
GUIDE
SOCIAL MEDIA DEFINED
Perhaps the best way to define social media is to break it down into its parts. Media is an
instrument of communication, such as a newspaper or radio; social media is a social instrument of communication. With traditional media, such as newspapers, television, radio, and
magazines, a person can’t respond instantly with his or her thoughts on the topic at hand.
Social media such as Facebook, YouTube and Twitter, however, as well as texting on a cell
phone, offer instantaneous, two-way communication. It further allows anyone with online
access to view the conversation.
Social networking enables people to interact online by posting comments, sharing photos
and videos, joining groups and having discussions, and “tweeting” very short messages –
just 140 characters long! To access these sites, people download software called apps, an
abbreviation for applications. Apps run on the Internet, a computer, a mobile phone, a tablet
such as an iPad, and other electronic devices.
The amount of people on social media is astounding: 1.1 billion people are on Facebook;
Twitter has 200 million active users; YouTube gets 4 billion views per day. Even newer social
media sites have millions of users — Pinterest with 48.7 million; Google+ with 343 million.
(Source: www.PCWorld.com).
Nearly nine out of ten teens (89.5%) are on Facebook, according to research from McAfee,
a leading Internet security software company. Half of teens say they only read and watch
rather than post their own content on social networks, but they are frequent users: 60%
of teen users check their accounts at least daily, and 41% check accounts constantly. (The
Realtimer Report).
SITES PARENTS SHOULD
LEARN FIRST
On the following pages are summaries of the apps and social media sites where today’s
teens spend the most time. All of these sites are free to join and most are not available to children under 13. While each collects data from users’ interactions, they also allow for public
or private personal settings. (Hint: Parents should read about each site’s privacy policy and
privacy settings before joining or allowing their children to join.) For excellent insight into
online terms and conditions (required to join any social media site) visit www.tosdr.org.
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FACT: 2.5 billion photos are
uploaded each month to Facebook.
Facebook.com
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YouTube is a social media site that allows users to upload and share original videos.
Parents should be aware that users often post mature content; while people under
18 are not supposed to have access to mature content, kids often find ways to work
around these rules. Anyone with a YouTube account can post videos and comment
on the videos they watch; the majority of videos that children and teens watch are
music videos, spoofs of celebrities or TV shows, and homemade videos posted by
their friends and other young adults. Parents should note that many comments are
mean or contain vulgar language. Teach your children not to engage with people
who post these types of comments. For more information about YouTube, visit
www.support. google.com/youtube/bin/answer.py?hl=en&answer=157177.
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Facebook was created in 2004 by Mark Zuckerberg when he was a student at
Harvard University; it was originally designed to enable college students to easily
post pictures and talk with each other online. By 2006, anyone over the age of
13 with a valid email address could join Facebook, and today it is the world’s largest
social network with more than 1 billion users worldwide. Facebook users
typically post their “status” (what they are doing at any given moment), as well as
upload pictures, videos and share favorite quotes and websites. Some Facebook
users also engage in social media games such as Farmville. A user’s Facebook posts
are organized in a Timeline – a chronological history of the user’s content. While
a person must accept a friend request to allow friends to view his or her Facebook
page, many kids accept friend requests from people they don’t know in an effort
to have the most friends – a type of virtual popularity. Parents should know that
Facebook offers a variety of privacy settings. One of the best safety precautions
parents can take is to become familiar with these settings and teach your children
how and why to set them for optimum safety. Excellent resources for a more com
prehensive overview of Facebook privacy settings include Time Magazine’s Techland
site (www.techland.time.com/2013/04/04/facebook-privacy-settings-guide/);
Kim Komando’s technology website (www.kimkomando.com) and Facebook’s
privacy information page (www.facebook.com/fbprivacy?fref=ts). Also see
Privacy Settings and Identity Protection below.
O f 8 0 0 a d o l e s c e n t s b e t w e e n t h e a g e s o f 12 to 17 s u r v e y e d b y t h e P e w I n t e r n e t
a n d A m e r i c a n L i f e P r o j e c t , 93 p e r c e n t s p e n d t i m e o n l i n e a n d 73 p e r c e n t h a v e p r o f i l e s o n s o c i a l n e t w o r k i n g s i t e s s u c h a s F a c e b oo k a n d T w i t t e r .
SOCIAL MEDIA AND YOUNG ADULTS, PEW INTERNET AND AMERICAN LIFE PROJECT, 2010 .
Sussman Sales in Partnership with Connect with Kids Education Network 6
FACT: More than 600,000 users are hacked on a daily basis
on Facebook. Escapist Magazine.com
• Google+ is owned and operated by Google Inc. Launched in June 2011, it gained
more than 500 million users in just two years. Google+ is like adding social media
to Google’s other properties, such as Gmail (unlike conventional social networks
which are generally accessed through a single property or website). Most people
use Google+ similarly to Facebook, although there are several differences; the main
one is that Google+ helps people build new connections by providing access to sites
throughout its broad platform. In addition, Google+ does not have paid advertising
or promoted content – two features that many adult Facebook fans find annoying,
but that kids typically don’t mind. Parents need to know that, as with other social
networking sites, Google+ is a data source; it captures the user’s activities, searches
and location, for example, and shares this information with companies such as
retailers and restaurants. More about Google+ privacy settings is available at
www.support.google.com/plus/answer/1047289.
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Instagram is a photo-sharing website. Users snap a photo with their mobile phone,
then choose filters and colors to artistically enhance the photo (i.e. put a gilded frame
around it; make it sepia-toned to look like an antique photo, etc.). Instagram uses
a “follower” model, and all photos are public by default, which means they are visible
to anyone using Instagram. However, Instagram enables users to select a private
option which allows users to approve who can view their photos. Parents can learn
more about Instagram’s privacy settings at www.instagram.com/about/faq/.
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Tumblr is a social networking site that allows users to post photos, quotes, links,
music, videos, and text. Online text posts are called “blogs,” which have been
compared to magazine articles, letters to the editor and even diary entries! Tumblr
uses a dashboard tool which shows all the recent blogs that a person follows.
The dashboard allows users to upload content to their blog with one click; users can
also choose to connect their Tumblr blogs to their Twitter and Facebook accounts, so
whenever they make a post, it will also be sent as a tweet (see Twitter next page) and
a Facebook post. Parents take note: users cannot make their primary blog private,
but they can ignore a user, who won’t be able to view their blog from the dashboard.
Users can also make specific posts private; for more about Tumblr privacy settings,
visit www.tumblr.com/docs/en/ignoring.
PARENT
GUIDE
• Twitter is a microblogging and social networking site that enables users to send
and see “tweets” — text-based messages up to 140 characters. Tweet is both a
noun (“I loved your tweet”) and a verb (“I tweeted about that”). Twitter is a fast-paced
site of more than 400 million tweets per day. It uses a follower model, so if a user’s
privacy settings are set to public, everything he or she posts can be viewed by
anyone who chooses to follow – and there are 200 million Twitter users. However,
Twitter offers a privacy setting that requires follower approval. Parents should know
that some tweets are graphic or may contain mature content. For more about Twitter
privacy, visit www.support.twitter.com/articles/14016-about-public-and-protectedtweets.
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Pinterest is one of the fastest-growing social media sites. It is a bulletin board-style
website that allows users to “pin” online images, photos, text and videos to a virtual
pinboard and share them with others. Examples of pinboard collages include a
collection of favorite fashions; pictures from an event; a list of your favorite books,
pictures from your hobbies – a person’s virtual pinboard can contain just about
anything. People with a Pinterest account can browse other pinboards, “re-pin
others’ images to their own pinboards, or “like” others’ photos. Unlike many social
media sites, there are no privacy options on Pinterest – users can follow anyone.
Parents should talk to their children about the importance of privacy and appropriate
online behavior, and visit your child’s pinboard frequently to ensure he or she is
posting responsibly.
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Myspace was one of the first and most popular social networks; it was founded
as a method for musicians to share and promote their music, and still has a strong
emphasis on sharing music. It defines itself as a “social entertainment destination
powered by the passions of fans.” (www.myspace.com/about). Myspace is similar
to Facebook; users post and share content including pictures, videos and, of course,
music. The site’s main demographic includes teenagers and young adults, and the
company takes privacy and the protection of minors seriously; if a young user
misrepresents his or her age, Myspace will delete the account. Myspace even has
a ParentCare page; visit it at www.myspace.com/help/safety/ parents/contact.
Sussman Sales in Partnership with Connect with Kids Education Network 8
PARENT
GUIDE
PRIVACY SETTINGS AND
IDENTITY PROTECTION
Each social networking site offers its own set of privacy options; the trick for parents is to
learn how to use them. Perhaps the most important safety precaution parents can take is to
review the sites’ privacy settings before their children open an account. On most sites, users
can adjust settings to control who can see their posts and who can access their timeline,
likes and comments. But as you read in the site summaries, some sites are always open to
the public, and most are public by default – you have to actively change the settings on your
account to make it private.
To further complicate matters for parents, many of these sites frequently update their look,
settings and features. The only way to truly understand the details is to spend some time
on each site and/or open your own account and explore the requirements and settings.
Ironically, your teen just may be your best tour guide! That’s okay; when your child is teaching you about an online site, you can teach your child life lessons in safety, privacy and
responsibility.
ADDITIONAL SAFETY TIPS
FOR PARENTS
Everyone should learn how to protect themselves online:
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Many experts suggest that parents require their children to accept them as
friends and followers on social media sites.
When your child first joins a social media site, insist on knowing his or her
account password – make it a condition of opening an account.
Experts suggest that parents monitor their child’s online behavior, particularly when
children are new to social media. If you see that your child has posted content that is
inappropriate or could be dangerous (i.e. “My parents left me alone for the first time
tonight – woo-hoo!”) – immediately tell your child to delete the post and explain why.
Adolescents and teens are often impulsive, and are not yet adept at thinking through
the consequences of their actions.
Teach your child the do’s and don’ts of online behavior; see the chapter on
Netiquette in this guide.
FACT: 87 percent of older teens ages 14 to 17 have a cell phone; 57 percent of younger
teens, ages 12 and 13, have a cell phone. There are no differences in phone ownership
between boys and girls overall. Pew Internet Report on Teens and Smartphones, 2012
Safety Tips for Kids
Parents can find more about safety on most of the social media sites; below are tips to tell
your kids, provided by Common Sense Media, a leading nonprofit kids’ advocacy group:
• Do not accept a friend or follower request from someone you do not know
personally.
• Never post your home address or phone number online.
• Think before you post text or a photo that contains vulgar language or might hurt
someone’s feelings. Many states have cyberbullying laws; anything a person
posts can be viewed by millions and can be searched and found online forever.
Inappropriate content can have greater harmful consequences as teens and young
adults apply for colleges and jobs. Today, you can be certain that admissions staff
and hiring managers view applicants’ social media pages.
• Do not respond to any emails requesting personal information, such as address,
social security number or credit/debit card number.
• Do not click on any website link that you receive in an email, even if you know the
person. This is a typical trick that hackers use.
• Delete emails from unknown senders without opening.
Many parents have learned these suggestions the hard way -- through their child’s inopportune or harmful postings on social media. Take note of these parent-to-parent tips:
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Teach your children the type of information that they should never post; don’t just tell
them, show them examples online. Emphasize how sharing seemingly unimportant
information could give a predator clues as to the location of a child or teen.
Most social media sites require that kids be 13 or older to create a profile; by law,
underage children should not have an account. However, younger kids sometimes
find ways to set up accounts. Parents can check their child’s Internet history to
view the sites he or she is visiting. If your child’s history is deleted, that may be cause
for concern.
Regardless of the online site, strong passwords are a must. A password should not
be easy to guess, so advise your children not to use a nickname, birthday or pet’s
name. Experts recommend using a combination of letters, numbers and symbols
to create a password that is not in the dictionary and is more difficult for hackers
to crack than regular words.
Personal identify information such as phone numbers, addresses and date of birth
should remain private. Remind your children that these should never be provided
in the “about” section of a social media site, or in order to download a free app or
access a website.
Sussman Sales in Partnership with Connect with Kids Education Network 10
FACT: Teens ages 12 to 17 send and receive 1,500 text
messages a month – per teen. Teens and Mobile Phones,
Pew Internet and American Life Project, 2010
SOCIAL NETWORKING:
HOW MUCH IS TOO MUCH?
Once upon a time, controlling childhood use of the media meant monitoring how much
our kids were watching television. The American Academy of Pediatrics still recommends
that children under age 2 should view no television at all and that parents should limit the
viewing time of older children to no more than two hours a day. That begs the question,
then: how can parents monitor and control recommended viewing time when screen time
has evolved from television to smartphones, tablets, laptops and desktop computers?
Parenting in the digital age calls for balance, common sense and some conventional
wisdom. Experts compare common-sense monitoring to a nutritional diet, where what
you eat is just as important as how much you eat. As our digital diet continues to evolve,
parents must stay informed and monitor how much time kids are spending in front of a
screen, as well as the content their children are consuming. Studies reveal potential risks
of overexposure to media – both in terms of time and content.
For example, an American Academy of Pediatrics study found that “teenagers ages
12 to 14 who are exposed to media with high sexual content are twice as likely to have sex
by the time they are 16 than those exposed to less sexual material.” Additional research
links television and computer viewing to an increased rate of obesity or aggressive behavior
in children.
Parent Tips for Limiting Screen Time (adapted from The Mayo Clinic)
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Keep TVs and computers out of the bedroom. Monitor your child’s screen
time and Internet activity by keeping computers in a common area in your home,
such as the family room or kitchen.
Don’t make TV a habit. Make television watching an event, not something to do
while eating, reading, talking, etc. Watching TV as a habit can lead to weight gain.
Set rules. Many parents limit television viewing and computer time during the week,
and implement rules such as completing homework before or after a favorite
television show. Avoid using television or computer time as a babysitter; encourage
your children to engage in other activities or to simply play outside. Make sure your
child’s caregivers follow your house rules.
Be a role model. Limit your own screen time; put away the cell phone or tablet at
meals, and when talking or playing with your child. And remember, no texting while
driving – your children are watching.
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Turn it off. If you are concerned that screen time is negatively affecting your child’s
behavior or mood, unplug it. Some parents also install parental controls on home
computers, televisions and cell phones.
Choose together. Instead of flipping through channels or YouTube videos,
research what is on television and topics that spark your child’s interests. Note the
TV Parental Guidelines — a rating system based on the appropriateness of a program
by age. Parents can also read about and/or preview video games before allowing
their children to play them.
Watch television and Internet content with your child. This is perhaps the most
important advice; when you watch with your children, you can gauge their reactions,
discuss the storyline and characters, and provide context around any content that
may be confusing or scary to your child.
BEST AGE FOR A CELL PHONE?
While many children tell their parents that they “have to have” a cell phone, many parents
wonder about the appropriate age to extend this privilege. Experts offer the following list of
questions for parents to ask themselves in order to determine if a cell phone is right for their
child. If you answer yes to most of these questions, and your budget allows for the purchase
and monthly plan costs, it may be a good time to give your child a cell phone.
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Is your child responsible?
Is your child fairly independent?
Does your child need to be in touch for safety reasons?
Does your child need to be in touch with you some days, and his or her other
parent on other days? (i.e. children from divorced families often have to abide
by two households’ schedules.)
Would having easy access to friends benefit your child for social reasons?
Do you think that your child is mature enough to use the phone responsibly?
For example, not texting during class, sending inappropriate text messages, or
disturbing others with their conversations?
Can your child adhere to limits you set regarding minutes talked, apps
downloaded and number of text messages sent?
With a child’s first cell phone, many parents will review texts messages to ensure their
child is not sending harmful or risky texts. In fact, you’ll find that all mobile carriers offer
parental controls and tips for monitoring usage. Visit your carrier’s website and search
“parental controls.”
Sussman Sales in Partnership with Connect with Kids Education Network 12
PARENT
GUIDE
NETIQUETTE
Emily Post, the longtime expert on social manners and public politeness, published her first
etiquette guide in 1922. Today, the 18th edition of Emily Post’s Etiquette, includes rules for
online etiquette, too. Online manners are sometimes known as netiquette – the etiquette of
social media, computer and cell phone use.
Parents will quickly understand that the same manners apply online as well as off, but kids
often see the Internet and social media sites as an anonymous world where they can get
away with behaviors that they could not in the real world. For example, it is never okay to
post mean-spirited comments, humiliating photos or videos, or tease or harass someone —
online or off. As parents help their children navigate the online world, experts suggest these
rules of netiquette:
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Employ The Golden Rule — Digital Version. Do not post or say anything
online that you would not say to someone’s face, or that would embarrass you if
read by your grandmother, teacher or boss.
Double-check before you press “send.” Could what you wrote be misinterpreted?
Is it rude, mean or sarcastic? Posting a mean or a nasty comment can kick off a
domino effect of harm, both for the person who posts it and the person the message
is about.
Beware of “reply to all.” Consider who will see your comments, and to whom
they can be forwarded without your control. It is also common courtesy not to reply
to all if your message is simply intended for the sender.
Respect others’ time and privacy. When sending an email to a group of people,
netiquette dictates that you place the email addresses in the “blind carbon copy”
or “bcc” field of your email. That way, you are not sharing the emails of the recipients
with everyone in the group.
Watch your grammar. Misspellings and overuse of all capital letters reflect poorly
on the sender, even in the age of text abbreviations. New online users and parents
may not realize it, but the use of all caps is interpreted as shouting.
TEXTING AND SEXTING
As with all online communication, experts advise parents to teach their children to be
responsible and safe when texting. The most important advice that parents can offer their
children is to “self-reflect before you self-reveal.” Because of the immediacy of online
communication, it takes self-control and practice to stop and think before you send.
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FACT: The proportion of children with their own cell phones has
nearly doubled since 2005. Mediamark Research and Intelligence
Parents can practice self-reflection with their children, by encouraging children to ask
themselves questions such as these before they send a text:
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Would I be embarrassed if mom, dad or my grandparents saw this text?
How might my friends react if they saw it?
How would I feel if my message got passed around to someone else, who could
do whatever they wanted with it?
Would I broadcast this comment over the school speakers for everyone to hear? How would I feel if someone said this about me?
Am I feeling angry or hurt? Will I still want to say this once I calm down?
Am I being self-righteous or stubborn?
Is the intention of this text to hurt someone’s feelings or make me feel superior?
Help your children understand that taking the time to answer these questions honestly
before they press send can help them prevent embarrassing themselves or hurting
someone else’s feelings.
Sexting refers to sending a text message and/or pictures that are of a sexual nature.
This includes naked or semi-naked photos, sexually suggestive texts and content that
describes sexual activities. This includes naked or semi-naked photos, sexually suggestive
texts and content that describes sexual activities. People who engage in sexting may not
realize that these messages frequently get forwarded to a much bigger viewing audience
than originally intended.
There are legal implications as well; people can be charged with pornography for sending,
forwarding and even receiving sext messages. (If the person in the sext image is underage,
child pornography laws may apply.) In fact, in some states, children can even be charged
with child pornography for sending sexualized images of themselves or others to other
kids, or for posting the images on the Internet. While this might be an uncomfortable
conversation to have with your children or teens (remember that first “birds and the bees”
conversation?), it is an important one. According to the American Academy of Child and
Adolescent Psychiatry (AACAP), talking to your children about sex and your family values
is an essential part of parenting. Today, parents should also include discussions about the
harmful effects of sexual messaging. The AACAP recommends that parents respond to the
questions, concerns and curiosity level of their child, offering no more or less information
than their child is able to comprehend. Regarding sexting, it is important to know what your
child understands (or doesn’t understand). Remind younger children that they should never
view photos of naked people online or on any electronic device. Encourage your child to talk
to you or a trusted adult if that should happen. Your conversation with older children can
include information about the seriousness of sexting: it can be illegal, result in suspension
from school, involve the police, and be emotionally harmful.
Sussman Sales in Partnership with Connect with Kids Education Network 14
DIGITAL CHEATING
With the Internet, it has never been easier to access information for school reports and,
unfortunately, it has never been easier to plagiarize by copying, pasting and presenting work
that someone else created. Additionally, some kids use their cell phones to text friends with
answers to quizzes and tests, or search the Internet for answers during a test.
Parent Tips for Raising Ethical Digital Kids
Parents can review schoolwork to ensure their children cite facts and references, and clearly
indicate their sources. Remind children that cutting and pasting content directly from a
website is plagiarism and a copyright violation – a message they have likely heard from
their teachers as well. If a sentence in your child’s paper sounds like it might be someone
else’s words, copy and paste it in the search field on your Internet browser; if that wording
exists online, it will show up in your search. When this happens, show how you found the
plagiarized content and teach your child either to rephrase the information in his or her own
words, or how to put the sentence in quotes and attribute it to the original source. While it
is easier than ever to cheat, it is also easier than ever to get caught. Experts recommend that
parents become familiar with school policies, and be aware that many schools have software
that can detect plagiarized material.
Even if you are sure that your child would never cheat, it is worth reviewing your school’s
consequences for plagiarism and cheating, and to reinforce these rules at home. Talk with
your children about cheating, and emphasize your family values of honesty and work ethic.
Remind them that even unintentional digital cheating is still cheating, and still subject to a
school’s policies.
CYBERBULLYING
According to The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA),
cyberbullying is “using technology as a vehicle for acts of cruelty.” Another widely-accepted
definition of Cyberbullying comes from Webster’s: “the electronic posting of mean-spirited
messages about a person, often done anonymously.” Cyberbullying can include mean text
messages or emails; rumors sent by email or posted on social networking sites; and the
creation of fake websites or profiles with embarrassing photos and videos. In today’s age of
social networking, Facebook, Twitter, texting, and the Internet, the cruelty of cyberbullying
can be difficult to track if kids share electronic devices or create fake online profiles. Other
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times, parents or law enforcement officers can easily track cyberbullying because many kids
taunt others openly on social media in order to get more reaction.
Part of a parent’s role in teaching digital citizenship is to talk with children about the words
and photos they post about others, as well as what they post about themselves. Much like
the rules of netiquette, ask your children to consider: Would you do or say this in person?
If the answer is no, instruct your child not to post it online or send it in a text. Teaching our
kids critical online thinking means encouraging them to evaluate their intention: “Why am I
posting this? Who will see it? Could it be misunderstood or hurtful?” Let your children know
that being mean is never acceptable, online or off; be clear about the consequences for
irresponsible behavior.
What if your child is the one being cyberbullied? Kids who are cyberbullied are often
bullied in person as well, but it is much harder for a victim to walk away from cyberbullying because it is more difficult to ignore: even in the safety of your own home, in your own
room, at your own desk — a bully can find you.
Ironically, kids who are bullied online will often engage in more online chatting, texting,
Facebook postings — all in an effort to win over the bullying crowd. What the victims do not
realize is that they are just getting in deeper and deeper, and giving the bullies more fuel for
continued bullying behavior.
The best strategy for students who are being cyberbullied is to seek a parent or other adult
for support; adults should immediately remove the victim from the situation (shut down
computers and mobile phones). Talk to your child about his/her feelings. Depending on your
child’s age, parents may want to contact the bully’s parents and/or their child’s school. Parents should also consider copying and saving the malicious online texts or posts, in case the
bullying is ongoing and needs to be reported. For a comprehensive overviewa of Cyberbullying and tips for parents, visit www.stopcyberbullying.org and view the real-life videos at
www.connectwithkids.com.
PARENTS –
THE FIRST LINE OF DEFENSE
When it comes to parenting the Internet Generation, safety and appropriate behavior has
moved well beyond talking with our children about stranger danger. In the elementary
school years, parents need to limit screen time and children must learn to balance television,
social media, texting and gaming with other, non-electronic activities. In the middle and
high school years, digital citizenship and Internet safety is about behaving respectfully and
responsibly, and understanding what the information you post online says about you and
your lifelong digital footprint.
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Experts recommend installing online filters, parenting controls, and keeping the computer
in an open, family space in order to protect pre-teens and oversee the sites they visit. While
more difficult, parents should also try to monitor their child’s activities on their cell phones
and tablets. Visit the website of your service provider for more information on parental
controls and online safety. Helping children harness the positive power of the Internet while
keeping them safe requires ongoing parent engagement and continuing conversations with
kids and teens.
A key tool that can help parents and children understand each others’ perspectives is an
“Internet Media Agreement.” There are several expert-recommended Internet Media
Agreements online, for elementary, middle and high school students. Parents can research
and select the one that best meets their values and goals. Search online for: “Parent Child
Media Agreements.” The agreements outline the rules of the road for keeping a healthy digital balance, ensuring safety and being a good “digital citizen.” As with any form of parental
discipline, there is no “one size fits all” agreement; however, consistent enforcement of
agreed-upon consequences and supportive reinforcement for following the rules is a good
place to start.
Beyond rules and regulations, parents must also realize that the Internet and electronic
devices are constantly changing, as are the sites that are popular among teens and
adolescents. There is no better way to stay abreast of these changes than to continue
learning about social media and to talk with your children. Consider these questions to
start a conversation with your kids:
Conversation Starters
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Which are your favorite sites to visit?
What are you favorite activities to do offline?
How could you be safer online?
What would you do if anyone online asked to meet you face-to-face?
Besides me, who do you feel you can talk to if you are faced with a scary or
uncomfortable situation?
What kinds of things do you post on your (Facebook) page?
How do you decide who to add as a friend?
Does anyone else have access to your passwords?
What information is okay to share online? What information should you keep
private? Why?
Have you ever regretted anything you posted online?
Source: www.netsmartz.org
On the following page is a chart to help children become good digital citizens. Post this
where your children use the computer, and refer to it frequently as you help your children
become smart, safe and respectful users of social media.
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DIGITAL CITIZENSHIP:
RULES FOR ONLINE LIVING
1
BE
HONEST.
Do not illegally download, gamble
or plagiarize.
Use strong passwords and do not
share them with others. Keep track
of your cell phone, laptop, iPad
and keep them in secure locations.
5
RESPECT
YOURSELF.
Maintain a sense of personal
privacy and your reputation. Your
uploaded photos and comments
can be seen by millions.
2
Everything in moderation.
Monitor and control the amount
of time spent in front of an
electronic screen each day.
3
BE
SAFE.
BE
HEALTHY.
BE
INTELLIGENT.
4
Learn and adapt to new technologies,
and balance online activities with
offline learning, too
RESPECT
OTHERS.
6
Think before you press send.
Mean-spirited text messages or
emails can hurt and exclude others.
Source: Connect
Sussman
with
Sales
Kidsin
Education
Partnership
Network
with Connect with Kids Education Network 18
Sources and Resources
American Academy of Pediatrics
www.aap.org
Boomer Tech Talk
www.boomertechtalk.com/internet-safety-tips-for-parents-an-introduction/
Chatropolis
www.chatropolis.com/chat_ dictionary.html
Common Sense Media
www.commonsensemedia.org
Connect with Kids Education Network
www.connectwithkids.com
Google
Safesearch Option on Google, Google Family Safety Center
www.google.com/goodtoknow/familysafety/tips/
Living and Learning with Mobile Devices
www.grunwald.com/pdfs/Grunwald%20LandL%20public%20report.pdf
Mayo Clinic
www.mayoclinic.org
Netsmartz
www.netsmartz.org
Norton Online Family Report
www.us.norton.com
PC World
www.pcworld.com/article
Pew Internet and American Life Project and Reports, 2012, 2013
www.pewinternet.org/Reports/2013/Teens-and-Tech.aspx
www.pewinternet.org/Reports/2012/Digital-differences/Overview.aspx
www.pewinternet.org/topics/Teens.aspx?typeFilter=5
The Real Time Report, Social Networking Stats; Teens on Social Networks
www.therealtimereport.com
SAMSHA
www.samhsa.gov
19
Sesame Street Workshop Always Connected: The new digital media habits of young children
www.joanganzcooneycenter.org
Tech Tips and Definitions, Geeks.com
www.geeks.com/techtips
Legislation
Children’s Internet Protection Act
www.fcc.gov/guides/childrens-internet-protection-act
Protecting Children in the 21st Century Act
www.fcc.gov/document/protecting-children-21st-century-act-amendment
Notes
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Notes
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Notes
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Notes
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