December 2015
Transcription
December 2015
December 2015 h C u f c o kles & Li’l s e r u t n e v R d i A c ky e h T RC 390 AKA “Li’l Ricky” 390 Duke AKA “Chuckles” Dirtbag Challenge • This Budman’s For You • CMSP Advisory Committee Meeting • IMS In The Sac Sympathy for Sean McGinnis • Return Of The Rattler • VNM Sport Gear • CityBike Book Club #.8%6$"5*)0/%" .0503$:$-&3&/5"- 4PVUI$JUZ4UPSF FBHMFSJEFSTGDPN TGCNXIPOEB!HNBJMDPN )4-JOEFO"WF4PVUI4BO'SBODJTDP %BJMZ3FOUBMBT-PXBT *ODMVEFTSFCBUFXJUIQIPUPPGUIJTBEFYQJSFT Reliable, timely service at reasonable rates on all makes of motorcycles Visit our new shop: D OL HO LLY 990 Terminal Way, San Carlos IN UN CO DU ST Y TR RI AL 101 L NA MI TER AN ITT ©2015 BMW Motorrad USA, a division of BMW of North America, LLC. The BMW name and logo are registered trademarks. BR BMW Motorrad USA Authorized Dealer The Ultimate Riding Machine® DON’T JUST SEIZE THE DAY. LEAN INTO IT. MAKE LIFE A RIDE. Not everyone takes the chance. Even fewer have the passion and the courage to make the most of it. But for those who can, for those who do, there is the all-new 2015 BMW S 1000 RR. For more information, visit bmwmotorcycles.com. BMW Motorcycles of San Francisco BMW Motorcycles of Walnut Creek www.bmwmotorcycle.com www.bmwmcwalnutcreek.com 790 Bryant Street @ 6th San Francisco, CA 94107 (415) 503-998 December 2015 | 2 | CityBike.com 1255 Parkside Drive Walnut Creek, CA 94596 (925) 938-8373 News, Clues & Rumors Volume XXXII, Issue 12 Publication Date: November 16, 2015 On The Cover: KTM’s littlest streekbikes (here in the US, anyway) facing out on San Antonio Road. Photo: Bob Stokstad Contents: NCR. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3 Pit Stops . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5 Uneasy Rider . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6 New Stuff . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8 Events. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 The Littlest Duke . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12 Arr, See?. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14 Baggin’ The Dirt . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17 Devine . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20 Doc Frazier . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21 Maynard . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22 Hertfelder . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 23 Classifieds . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24 Slap-drunk . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26 Last Page Photo . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27 RC 390 Crashability Study . . . . . . . . . 29 Find us online at: CityBike.com Facebook.com/CityBikeMag Twitter.com/CityBikeMag Instagram.com/CityBikeMag CityBike Staff: PO Box 18738 Oakland CA 94619 Phone: 415.282.2790 Editorial: [email protected] Advertising / Business: [email protected] Editor in Chief & Jackass of All Trades: Surj Gish Master of Puppets & Layout: Angelica Rubalcaba Senior Editor: Robert Stokstad Contributing Editors: John Joss, Will Guyan, Courtney Olive Chief of the World Adventure Affairs Desk: Dr. Gregory Frazier Staff Photographers: Robert Stokstad, Angelica Rubalcaba Illustrations: Mr. Jensen Operations: Gwynne Fitzsimmons Road Scholars: J. Brandon, Sam Devine, Jeff Ebner, An DeYoung, Max Klein Contributors: Dan Baizer, Craig Bessenger, Blaise Descollonges, Dirck Edge, Julian Farnam, Alonzo Fumar, Will Guyan, Brian Halton, David Hough, Maynard Hershon, Ed Hertfelder, Otto Hofmann, Jon Jensen, Bill Klein, David Lander, Lucien Lewis, Larry Orlick, Jason Potts, Bob Pushwa, Gary Rather, Curt Relick, Charlie Rauseo, Mike Solis, Ivan Thelin, James Thurber. Alumni (RIP): John D’India, Joe Glydon, Gary Jaehne, Adam Wade Back Issues: $5, limited availability Archived Articles: We can find stories and send you scanned images for $5/page. No, we will not mail you our last copy for free just because your buddy Dave was on the cover. Please know the name of the story and the year of publication...at least! If you say something like, “it was about this cool bike I used to see at Alice’s and I think it was in CityBike in 1988... or maybe 1994” we will buy a cheap latex adult novelty and mail it to your grandkids. For back issue and archive requests, please mail check made out to CityBike magazine to PO Box 18738, Oakland, CA 94619 or send money and request to [email protected]. CityBike is published on or about the third Monday of each month. Editorial deadline is the 1st of each month. Advertising information is available on request. Unsolicited articles and photographs are always welcome. Please include a full name, address and phone number with all submissions. We reserve the right to edit manuscripts or use them to wipe our large, fragrant bottoms. ©2015, CityBike Magazine, Inc. Citybike Magazine is distributed at over 200 places throughout California each month. Taking more than a few copies at any one place without permission from CityBike Magazine, Inc, especially for purposes of recycling, is theft and will be prosecuted to the full extent of civil and criminal law. Yeah! CityBike magazine is owned by CityBike Magazine, Inc and has teams of sleep-deprived, coke-addicted attorneys ready to defend it from frivolous lawsuits, so even if you see Lucien Lewis doing one of his wheelies on the cover and decide you want to do that too and then you hit a parked car and your bike is wedged under a van and it catches fire and the Vallejo FD has to come and extinguish the resulting blaze and four cars and your bike are melted into slag and you suffer permanent trauma including a twisted pinkie, sleeplessness and night terrors, it’s not CityBike Magazine Inc.’s fault and we don’t have any assets so just suck on it. You know better. Photo Of The Month: Spirit Of First Annual (?) Fuck Black The Sunday Morning Ride, 1976 Friday Ride You guys remember Ben from SF—the dude that periodically sends us care packages with a bunch of photos from the olden days on disk and a binder with copious notes about each photo: year, location, details. He recently sent us his third package, with 197 documented photos. We’ll probably have to give this a different, maybe slightly less offensive name, assuming anyone shows up and we keep doing it. But we kept having these “fuck Black Friday, let’s go riding” conversations around CityBike HQ and decided that instead of just spitting potty-mouthed Photo: Ben from SF Think about that for a sec. In a time when the maximum level of effort from most amateur photographers is “point phone, click, post on Instafacepalm,” Ben from SF asked not what CityBike could do for him, but what he could do for CityBike. He’s now scanned hundreds of actual, physical old timey photographs, documented the background of each, and sent ‘em to us. Thank you, Ben! We love this stuff. BARF On The AMA (Magazine Cover) The dominance of the AMA’s cover space by Bay Area motorcyclists continues. First, Editor Surj graced the cover of the May issue in high-vis Aerostich glory, and now Budman, AKA Dennis Kobza, AKA “the guy that runs BARF,” AKA “the guy that’s on the CMSP Advisory Committee and is responsible for a lot of the good stuff that’s been going on with lane splitting in California for the last couple years,” shows up on the cover as a result of his inclusion in an article entitled “Motorcycling’s Innovators” in the November 2015 issue. His piece, under “Advocacy” is too short to give him the credit he’s due for all he’s accomplished, from giving motorcyclists something to do— BARFing—while they’re stuck at work, to all the aforementioned advocacy. Our own An DeYoung attended the CMSP Advisory Committee meeting for CityBike this year (see page 5 for the story), and especially since that’s a once annually thing, strong representation is critical for us. For all you do, this Budman’s for you. Thanks, Dennis! about CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocates) at casaofalamedacounty.org, but trust us—they’re doing good work. Check our Facebook page for details as we figure ‘em out: facebook.com/citybikemag. Hope to see you there! New ShittyBike Shirts Yeah, two profane headlines in a row. Sorry, Larry! And guess what—these aren’t even actually ShittyBike t-shirts. What we mean is, the “ShittyBike San Francisco” thing on the back is gone. Look, we love that shit, and everyone who’s anyone knows that toilet humor is the funniest humor there is, but the reality is that not every reader of this thing wants to run around with that shit on their back. rebellion into the wind, we’d make a thing of it. Ride Friday Give Back or whatever. Hey, that’s better already! So here’s the deal: we’re gonna meet at Middle Harbor Shoreline Park at 10 AM on Black Friday, and head out for a mellow ride. The route is still in the works, most likely through the East Bay hills, but we’ll end up at Lanesplitter in Emeryville for pizza and hang time. The generous folks at Lanesplitter will cover the first ten tasty pies, which is gonna be an awful lot of So when one longtime fan recently said, “CityBike isn’t shitty any more,” we took that shit to heart. Oh snap! For reals? Yes. Sorry, uh… everyone. Also, we’re not really just an SF thing, at least in part because CityBike can’t afford The City any more, and as you know, we’re extremely concerned about being factual and truthful, so rather than changing the shirts to say something like “ShittyBike Greater San Francisco Bay Area and Beyond” we decided to try something new. So what is this new shit? You’ll have to go to citybike.com/citybike-shirts.html to find out. Fans of the original shitty design, don’t fret. Those shirts are still available. For now. We haven’t decided whether we’ll keep making ‘em, though, so get ‘em while the gettin’s shitty, son. Sympathy for Sean McGinnis Many of San Francisco’s moto-community feel sympathy for the Ducati rider who has been charged with killing a pedestrian. Anyone who has experience navigating the twisty, hilly streets of San Francisco knows first hand the cluelessness that is endemic to 90% of those using their soles as their means of transport. People leave their hearts in San Francisco, but they forget to bring their heads. Perhaps there is something in the way that the pavement interacts with the soles of the shoes of people walking around in this showpiece of American culture. pizzas for the Wrecking Crew to eat on our The Wrecking Crew have ridden and own, so hopefully a few of you will show up. driven literally hundreds of thousands of miles through the peninsula-city as As for the giving back, we’re asking for at motorcyclists, tour bus operators, taxi least a $20 donation from each rider, and we’ll be giving the entire amount to CASA driver, delivery persons, and we know the streets about as good as anyone who can of Alameda County. You can learn more December 2015 | 3 | CityBike.com still afford to live there. And one of the things that you learn first when operating a moving vehicle in SF is that the pedestrian is a sort of divine being blessed by Creation Supreme with the right to cause the cars to come to a screeching halt by placing his holy foot in a crosswalk. Photo: Sam Devine Brian Wright: Thrown Away More Trophies Than Most Have Won “I’m not a big trophy guy. Unless it’s a trophy that just really blows my mind I’m probably not gonna keep it. At some show up north I won a trophy for best custom. And after I moved it three or four times, I just tossed it. “ That’s probably what happens with most trophies, really. “Yeah, I don’t build cars for trophies. I build ‘em to be one of the cool guys. Same thing with bikes. When they see me going through town, I like that.” So, is there a difference between cars and bikes? “Absolutely. I enjoy the bikes a lot more.” Yeah? Why’s that? “Well, they’re cheaper. Buying two tires is a lot cheaper than buying four. They’re a little easier to get around and work on. And they go together a lot faster. For me to build something like this truck it takes nine months, maybe a year. I can throw a bike together in a month if I’m motivated.” So how many Dirtbags now? But the dumbest of the dumb is when a void-brained blockhead pedestrian walks right in front a speeding motorcycle expecting the rider to do some framesnapping “question mark maneuver” that defies the laws of physics. Apparently San Franciscans think that a speeding iron missile propelled by an internal combustion-driven mother and balanced upon two rubber tires is more like a computerized animation from a child’s fantasy film. The stupidity of the pedestrian towards any driver (even though Mr. Pedestrian’s car is just around the corner) appears accelerated when the San Franciscan puts his foot out in front of a motorcyclist. Consider the utterly murderous hick slob who swerved towards a riding couple enjoying their two wheels, and sent the pair into the scenery with serious injuries. The moron (who has been charged) declared “I don’t care” to the rider who filmed the attempted murder. At which point the rider with the helmet-cam informed Mr. Hick that he was “a really fucking dumb dude.” chrome and plastics and demanding “Pedestrian Rights” in impossibly absurd circumstances. And this could be a possible scenario in any motorcyclistpedestrian collision because many who ride in San Francisco—still America’s most motorcycle city—have had similar nearmiss experiences. Therefore, we say the community needs to support Mr. McGiniss if only for a vote to keep some semblance of common sense alive in the saga he is undergoing. - Miles Davis Have You Seen Our Rack? We received a strange phone call in midOctober, from someone claiming to know the whereabouts of one of our racks, that we didn’t actually know went missing, and offering assistance in reacquiring said rack in exchange for the five thousand dollar reward. Huh? Sure, buddy, if you’ve got one or our racks, we want it back, but we aren’t gonna give you five grand for it. But yeah, pal, get us more info. We’ll pay you some kind of reward. The rack was supposedly being rolled around the alleys of San Francisco by someone who is “sort of homeless.” Our greedy new friend claimed he knew this person: “some of my friends have dated him” but didn’t know his name, or actual location. Such episodes show that there is a preexisting stereotypical view of motorcyclists that can really ignite when some people Shortly after, we hear from Tokyo Moto risk their lives by putting foot in front of that their rack has disappeared, rolled away a bullet of two-wheeled speeding metal, during the day. Now we’re pissed—this “Successfully? Let’s see there was last year… Well, I’ve made it more than I haven’t made it. I wanna say that I’ve done it four times.” How many bikes have you worked on that were at the East Bay Rats show? “At that show, I think just three.” Interesting carb setup on one of those bikes… “Yeah, I don’t usually do pods. I do a log intake and then just run two pods for four carbs, one on each side. It’s kinda like the air volume going into each carb seems to even out a little bit and you get a better running bike. I always go up a couple sizes on the mains.” What was your first bike? “First motorcycle or first two wheels with a motor? Cause I had the Briggs and Stratton mini bike. That was my first two wheels. Five horsepower, man, and when the muffler fell off, my dad had an old chrome air horn and he cut that off and he clamped it on there so I had a big blooey pipe on it. Man, you could hear me blocks away. That thing was so loud. The handlebars broke off. I took it to a welding shop and the guy just put a mound of braze over the whole handlebar to get it to stick. I don’t know how he did it, what he welded it with but he got done and you know, it didn’t fall apart anymore.” - Sam Devine Photo: Surj Gish December 2015 | 4 | CityBike.com is one of our old custom racks, a seriously badass piece of work to rival most of the home equity-funded choppers built in the nineties and early two-thousands, that apparently still get out of the garage once a year for the Love Ride. We call the dude—Josh— back, and tell him we’ve got more info, and we definitely want his help. He starts acting— surprise, surprise—like a methed-out spider monkey, alternating between “when do I get my reward” and “get off my back, man.” By this time, our Facebook post about our missing rack has been shared quite a bit, and every motorcyclist in San Francisco is looking for it. Ok, that’s perhaps a little optimistic, but it turns out that the motorcyclist that mattered had their eyes open. One of Tokyo Moto’s customers, and presumably one of our readers, who we’ll call Anonymous Hero, since we don’t know their name, spotted our rack in the Tenderloin, being pushed by someone whose name we also don’t know—we’ll call him Anonymous Crackhead. Maybe-empty threats of violence aside, we talked with Linda about “the change” at Helimot, and she told us that the last few weeks, especially the week right before Halloween (the deadline) have been crazy, with people lined up to get fitted while they still can. “It was sort of a frenzy. Right now the sewing machines are smoking, and Helmut’s hair is on fire, getting all those suits made. This will continue at least through the end of March. We have some big changes taking place at Helimot in the very near future. We will be out of the suit business, BUT NOT OUT OF BUSINESS.” Everyone get that? NOT OUT OF BUSINESS. “The store will be rearranged and updated. We’re a brick and mortar store and we want to have a serious stock of boots, gloves, back protectors, and a number of other things so Bay Area motorcyclists can come in and get properly fitted the first time, rather than trying to deal with sizes over the internet. We will, of course, also have an internet presence, and a new website.” In addition to NOT GOING OUT OF BUSINESS, Helimot will be stocking a more extensive line of Daytona boots, including a new short model. Or rather, boot. Models are usually tall, we’re told. 2016 Aprilia RSV4 RF Limited Edition. Only 200 in North America. In stock NOW. CALL 510.594.0789 © Piaggio Group Americas, Inc. 2015. Aprilia ® is a U.S. and worldwide registered trademark of the Piaggio Group of companies. Obey local traffic safety laws and always wear a helmet, appropriate eyewear and proper apparel. I am changing the business structure of my shop effective January 2016. This new structure will allow me to take a personal sabbatical to be a full time mother raising my 3 year old son and 4 year old daughter.” The shop will no longer be open to the public—Jenn will concentrate on repairs for personal clients, teaching motorcycle repair to individuals on a one-to-one basis, and other motorcycle related projects in the wider Bay Area. This change will take effect by January 1st, 2016. Repair requests will be accepted at the current 17th Street location through December 1st, 2015. After that, private clients only. Want to be one of those clients? Email [email protected] to discuss any mentoring, teaching, or repair work desired. Jenn also said, “I want to thank every friend and client that has touched my life in the last 22 years Anonymous Hero confronted Anonymous Helmut and the Helimot crew cranki ng out for the wonderful the last of the suits. Crackhead, took the rack and defended experience I it against further insult and injury until had with the SFPD showed up. Tokyo Moto picked motorcycle it up from SFPD, and all is well in San community of Francisco again. San Francisco Thank you, Anonymous Hero for and beyond. It has reclaiming our rack, and thank you, been a rich and Tokyo Moto for getting it back from rewarding time. SFPD. You guys rock! From starting my business in the back Helimot: Out Of The Suit of a welding shop to Business, NOT OUT OF employing 6 people, from doing my first BUSINESS track day on an old Seriously, you guys. We expect more Kawasaki in 1998, And… more glove models! from you. When we reported (“No More to becoming 2nd place in the first TTXGP Helimot Suits. No Foolin’” – “News, Clues There are still about thirty of the new, used International Electric Racing Series in and Rumors, April 2015) that Helimot was and display suits left, which are being sold 2010, and from barely speaking English, gonna stop making suits, “to focus on glove at CityBike-level cheapskate prices (Editor pointing at parts of the motorcycle, to manufacturing and exporting,” some of Surj bought one). So head down to Helimot becoming one of the first woman-owned you apparently took that as Helimot going and see if one of these will fit you, because out of business. What part of “focusing on this is the only way you’re gonna get a gloves” translates to “out of business?” Helimot suit now. See the all caps above? We’re trying to But one more time: NOT OUT OF be extra-clear this time, and we’ve asked BUSINESS. Got it? Helmut and Linda to get the name of anyone who comes into their shop and says Also Not Out Of Business… Sort something like “You guys still in business? Of: Werkstatt I read in CityBike that you were closing” so we can first, shame you in the hallowed But also big changes. Jenn has decided to change it up at Werkstatt: pages of News, Clues and Rumors, and second, kick your ass, like the end of Jay “After 21 plus years of raising my And Silent Bob Strike Back, when Jay and Werkstatt Motorcycle Repair, LLC, from Bobbins start delivering payback firsthand. a one-person-operation to a full-fledged motorcycle repair, service and racing shop, December 2015 | 5 | CityBike.com Scooters Are Our Passion Vintage Scooters in SF Vespa & Lambretta SALES SERVICE • PARTS • RESTORATIONS www.bellomoto.com 415 872.5567 motorcycle repair shops in the country, I wouldn’t miss a day of it.” The only good news for fans of Werkstatt, the shop, is that Jenn is offering 20% off on all in-stock and special order parts through Dec 15th, and 20% off on tune ups through December 1st. That’s something, we suppose. Best of luck to you, Jenn! Let’s Talk About California Motorcycle Safety This One Time Each Year And Not Really Tell Anyone After reading Editor Angry Old Man’s call to arms a couple issues back (“We Think You Should Attend The Annual CMSP Advisory Committee Meeting” – News, Clues and Rumors, October 2015), I put in my request to attend, confirmed my bike registration, insurance, and license were all current, checked for any outstanding warrants, and headed over to the CHP headquarters here in Sacramento for the CMSP (California Motorcyclist Safety Program) Advisory Committee Meeting. In case you missed Editor Surj’s rant, the advisory committee meeting happens once a year at CHP HQ in Sacramento. This year’s meeting was on October 20th. I arrived early, which was good because my name wasn’t actually on the list. CityBike gets no respect, I tell ya. Once checked in, I was led back to the meeting room where I took a seat. I had a large selection of open seats to choose from—where was everyone? Yeah, it was on a weekday, fine… but really? I think there were maybe five other people there just to observe. The rest of the attendees were committee members. After a little small talk, the meeting got started. Introductions all around, then approval of the minutes from the last meeting which took place way back in Sept 2014. Yes, we do this just once a year. The next hour and a half was Power Point slides. The first deck outlined what the CMSP does—shouldn’t everyone in this meeting know already?—but the information on public safety efforts over the last year, community outreach at events, and media campaigns was helpful for me as a first-time attendee. New rider training was a big topic, with Lee Parks in attendance to talk about how the transition from MSF to Total Control Training was coming along. In other news, motorcycle registrations are still on the rise, as are new rider licenses, because motorcycles are awesome. Unfortunately, crashes and fatalities are keeping pace with this rise—no too awesome. The ever-growing safety fund total has almost hit the eleven million mark, at $10,978,000 for the 2014/15 fiscal year. That’s an increase of $426,000 from 2013/14, when the fund was at $10,552,000. More money is good, right? In this case, it means the money isn’t being spent on keeping riders safe, although the increase this year pales in comparison to last year’s increase of $889,000. There was discussion of what that money may or may not be spent on, and frankly, aside from a media campaign, I’m not really clear on the plans. From the sound of things, getting approval to spend any amount consists of a whole lot of paper shuffling, discussions, meetings about discussions, more paper shuffling, buncha emails, and then possibly a decision, after it lands on the right desk. current Chair leaving for a new position, not much was said that I hadn’t heard from Editor Surj during his “how much you wanna bet the goddamn fund is still not being spent?” background phone call the It’s cool, though. Not like anyone’s dying or night before the meeting. anything. One thing that really stands out is that Dr. Thomas Rice was there and presented this meeting only happens once a year. findings of his Enhanced Motorcycle ONCE. This is a huge state, with 1.4 Collision Data Project as well as analysis million licensed riders, and this committee on the association between helmet type is sitting together in a room once a year, for and risk of head injury. Pretty shocking to two hours. learn that there are people out there riding around in novelty helmets, thinking they And you weren’t even there to hear it. have just as much protection as a DOT - An DeYoung full-face. Spend some money on yourself and get a real helmet. Seriously. Treat Dirtbags On Film, Part Two: yourself—you deserve it. Return Of The Rattler The final thirty minutes were set aside for a round table—not really a discussion so much as each person on the committee getting the floor for a few minutes to present ideas, ask any questions, make a statement. Aside from goodbyes to the Traffic is still tight, so he can’t do much, but then the centipede breaks apart, and the fucker punches it. Oh, it’s on, son. Which is probably accurate, age-wise. Hot Pursuit & Evidence Tech It’s Wednesday night, a little after 6 PM. The “fall back” thing happened ‘round Halloween, so it’s pitch black out, even though it’s barely quittin’ time. I ‘Stich up and hit the bridge on my trusty R1200R, headed for Oakland. Traffic’s been a bit gnarlier this week: the spaces between the cars seem a little smaller than usual, the drivers even more tuned-out (or tuned into the wrong stuff), and there are lots of bikes out. That last one oughtta be a good thing, but lately, “a bit gnarlier” seems to include a higher number of lanejumping splitters, weaving between the in-betweens, dropping willy-Vanilli into the split in front of other riders without checking. assumption that granddaddy Ninja is gonna stick around to help, and I cut to the right, leaned over all gymkhana-style, and go after the aforementioned fucker as he continues on. I try 911 again, and they have time for me this time. I tell the operator what happened, where I am, and she says, “You’re following the driver? Sir, please get away from the car. You don’t know if the driver is armed.” I don’t say this, but I do know that the driver is in fact armed, with a car, duh, one of the most popular and ruthlessly effective weapons on Pause: I can’t factually state whether the the street. car hit the rider’s front wheel, or the rider I also don’t just choked his front brake so badly that say that I’ve he flipped. Point is, I don’t know whether had a gun contact was actually made, but even if pulled on Just past the toll plaza, I’m behind an older it wasn’t, it was damn close, and in my me in traffic, Ninja-looking bike, with another rider instant transition to “a fellow rider got and some just beyond. I’m not behind these two for taken out!” mode, I’m convinced that the oblivious five seconds when a self-absorbed asshole driver needs to be part of the roadside fucknut in in a red Camaro—of course—does discussion with the downed rider, who— a Camaro one of those self-absorbed asshole lane contact or no—is on the ground as a result ain’t that Photo: Bob Stokstad changes, the one where said asshole sees of the Camaro driver’s stupid asshole scary. a gap—and nothing else, because they move. I do say, “Yeah. Ok.” And I finish telling don’t look—and jerks the wheel to snag the operator where the guy is, now the open spot before it’s gone. So they can Un-pause: Camaro driver is rolling on the shoulder at a couple miles per hour, heading on to 24. Another rider has joined advance like three feet. not quite ready to give up. After a few me at this point. In the little bit of face The Camaro instantly crosses into the seconds of this, he decides his escape route I can see in the viewport of his helmet, lane to its right, and the bike in front involves going through me. Fortunately, I he looks a lot like Sam Devine. No such instantly upends—brake light bright as expected this, so I move with him, staying luck, but the rider either saw the crash and the ass-end of the bike goes up and over close—my knee is almost on his door— wants to help, or is just crazier than me the tea kettle. and applying pressure, but also staying and wants to get in on the harassment of clear. the Camaro. He’s hemming the Camaro It’s not exactly slow motion, but feels way in from the right, while I keep him from longer than the couple seconds that this I push the phone button on my Sena going anywhere on the left. We’re like a series of events actually takes. and shout “DIAL 911!” The wait time couple dogs yipping and nipping at the (seriously?!) is too long, so I call my wife Old timey Ninja stops behind the heels of a larger, much more assholish and say, “Hey. Just saw a rider taken out. now-downed rider, and the fucker in animal. Write this down: 7 M I W 4 7 5. Fuckin’ the Camaro looks to be continuing on asshole in red Camaro.” I’m keenly aware that this may look be his merry way. I make a split-second looking like some kind of New York Traffic is stacked up like an automotive centipede, so Camaro guy has gone about 30 feet during all of this. I’m instantly at the driver’s door, and I point to the shoulder, saying “You just caused a crash. Pull over.” I flip up my helmet and say it again. The guy—maybe early twenties— edges to the shoulder. He knows he’s caught. December 2015 | 6 | CityBike.com It’s an odd setting: black leather, t-shirts and tattoos amidst the clean, stucco courtyard of the Delancey Street complex. Beneath a blue sky, resplendent with water fountain, it looks more like the set of a Range Rover scenario, and anyway, there’s not anything I can really accomplish at this point, unless I’m actually gonna kick the shit out of him. Which I’m not. So I signal to Sam’s doppelganger, cut in next to him and say, “911 is on it.” And then I cut off of 24 and head home to post my adventure on BARF. Naturally. The intercom made the difference between just being pissed and being able to do something. Sure, a camera would have been even better, because I would have been able to post the video on YouTube, publicly shaming Camaro guy online instead of just publishing his license plate in CityBike. But I was able to capture the info, which made my perhapsmisguided hot pursuit worthwhile. It’s easy to scoff at the “all the GoPros, all the time” mindset—it’s sort of a fatalist mentality, running a camera because something is sure to happen eventually. But in this case, the tech made a difference. I’m not a lawyer—too busy with CityBike for that law school shit—so I don’t know whether fault could even be assigned to the fucker in the Camaro if he didn’t actually clip the rider. It seems these things rarely go our way. So maybe the whole thing was for naught. And I’d be even more irresponsible than I just demonstrated in this story if I didn’t say “don’t try this shit at home, or anywhere.” Shakespearean play about Roman nobility than the premiere of a biker flick, tattoos and face piercings aside. The crowd is sipping on complimentary beer and wine and snacking on a cheese platter sponsored Huge Moto and Tokyo Moto. Inside, behind a merch table, Frank Pascual is smiling and selling black t-shirts But perhaps Frank Pascual puts it best when he says: “At work, the only satisfaction I get is that I won’t get into trouble for doing my job.” Motorcycle Club. And of his edit of DBII, which comes in at just under an hour: “There’s nothing I can really take out and nothing I can really add.” The Rattler crew work in the digital realm or in management and while building their bike, they take joy creating something more physically tangible, more permanent. “I liked it,” says Tom “Moose” Rienecker afterwards. “It was irreverent. When you look at all the stuff the Discovery channel puts out, they’re so serious about it. Like they’re making great art.” One of Asuncion’s co-workers, Jonathan Rosales, expresses a similar feeling about digital production. “It was really cool to see this because I can relate,” says emblazoned with a green image of the Rattler, the bike we’re all here to see a movie about. Dirt Bag II: The Return of the Rattler is the second feature film directed by Paolo Asuncion. His first, Dirtbag, is a documentary of the infamous Dirtbag Challenge (Check out our write up on this year’s Dirtbag over on page 17!). The new film focuses on a group of four friends and their efforts to build a chopper for under $1,000 in one month’s time. Watching Paolo Asuncion, Luis Baptista and brothers Frank and Erik Pascual struggle together on this quest gives the Rattler a buddy-movie feel. We learn about their day jobs, watch them progress as mechanics and get to rejoice when (spoiler) their bike makes it to the competition. Though there was some joking around about sponsors towards the end of Asuncion’s first film, Dirtbag II is more light hearted, peppered with jokes throughout. Asuncion and crew craft quality bait-andswitch comedy and situational gags. The set ups are a little heavy-handed and easy to spot but the followthroughs are good—often laugh out loud good. The film ends with a hilarious fantasy sequence that has to be seen to believed. Whether or not these films and bikes are great art will be for history to decide (our vote is for yes!). But one thing is for certain: And that’s the second thing in just the first the filmmakers and bike builders are few pages of this issue that I have to caveat having fun. And that might be even better. with “don’t try this yourself, and if you do, don’t blame me if it goes wrong.” - Sam Devine Tire Hugger - Surj Gish When I talked to non-Bay Area folks about the moto-culture ‘round these parts, one of the things that’s tricky to convey sometimes is the multidisciplinary nature of riders here. One-dimensional stereotypes like “dirt riders don’t care about anything beyond selfishly roosting trails into oblivion and flat-brim hats” and “capital-B Bikers can’t ride and are too stupid to wear helmets” are seldom true anywhere, but even less so here, and in spite of the Bay’s reputation as a liberal stronghold, there’s an endless variety of riders that blow away that bullshit, like a fiscally responsible, gun-toting vegan straight-edge biker with strong environmental beliefs. Photos: Bob Stokstad After an hour of milling about, we line up and enter the theater. It’s a full house and the room is surprisingly nice. Much nicer than the Opera center where the first Dirtbag premiered. The walls are padded with a pillow mural of the SF waterfront. “It’s like something you’d see at my grandma’s house,” whispers my date as the lights go down. traffic, with cars parked at weird angles for a couple miles back, people walking around on the shoulder, sitting in folding lawnchairs—surreal. I split through it until I came upon another rider, Moe, hanging out on the shoulder by her Harley. She had ridden up from Southern California to see a friend with cancer and not long to live, and she was in no mood to wait for the mess to clear. After a couple minutes, she suggested we ride the other way on the shoulder, which we did. Self-congratulatory, “the Bay is so much better than everywhere else” back-patting aside, organizations like our pals at Rosales. He also likes the one-month limit of the DBC. “I help design RidersRecycle make sense here, with their the packaging for our products, so there’s a emphasis on thoughtful, legal disposal of oil and filters. street date, a release date. And that date is going to come whether you’re ready or not. On October 24th, RidersRecycle teamed You’re never going to get it perfect so you up with ZeroWasteMarin and Motopia in try to do something you can live with.” San Rafael to give riders an opportunity to Before the feature presentation started, we were treated to a sneak peek of a potential YouTube series by Asuncion and friends called “The Handsome exchange their used motorbike filters for a new one at no cost. Conservation Corps North Bay collected used motorcycle tires at the event, also for free. I didn’t have any used oil filters handy, but I seem to always have a stack of tires, so I strapped seven of ‘em to the back of my trusty R1200R and headed to San Rafael. I was the first rider to show up, arriving before the event had even started, and everyone was stoked about my ridiculous stack of tires. As I as unloading, more riders started showing up, with tires and filters. Ultimately, turnout was decent, with 30-something filters given away and about 50 tires Asians Motorcycle Club.” Something of a collected. Stay tuned for more information mirthful Mythbusters meets motorcycling on the next event like this. Maybe we’ll do The film also has an underlying theme: mini-series, we see the group discuss riding a contest: most tires on a motorcycle gets a “Make it Your Own.” And the theme together, lament their frequent pee-breaks, CityBike t-shirt. transcends just bike-building, trickling into the crew’s troubles with work, religion and attempt to ratify the issue with hoses Weirdest part of the morning for me and sobriety. We also hear from other bike and clamps. The awkward absurdity though, wasn’t the tire sculpture on the that follows has the house howling with builders on how they’ve made their bikes back of my bike, but rather the Walking laughter. Search it by title on YouTube for a their own. Jason Lisica, Julian Farnam, Dead-esque conditions on the San good chuckle. John Ramos, Justin Martens, and Eric Rafael Bridge, headed back to Oakland. McDougald all explain their own day jobs “The aim with that one is to do some There was a crash in the middle of the and how their passion for bike building fills crazy shit but also do some real stuff,” bridge, resulting in completely stopped a whole in their lives. says Asuncion of the Handsome Asian Photo: Surj Gish December 2015 | 7 | CityBike.com From 3:14 Daily Valencia @ 25th 415-970-9670 IMS 2015: Sacratomato Better Than San Mateo? CityBike Road Scholars An and Sam headed to Sacratomato for the Progressive International Motorcycle Show. An: Leader Of The Sac and hung around the vendor areas inside when it was. The usual manufacturers were there: BMW, Harley, Ducati, Kawi, Indian, even Royal Enfield. Local dealers covered Honda, Triumph, and MV Agusta. I even found CSC’s small booth with their $3,500 ADV bike. No sign of KTM, presumably because they knew I’d steal their RC 390. I was happy the IMS moved to Sacto this Marketplace vendors were familiar— year. Three hour, mind-numbing ride to San Mateo aside, the show itself has been a earplugs, anti-foggers, gloves, biker gear, shadow of its former self for the last few years. Makodo Endo painting a Scout with chopsticks. Maybe a new location is just what’s needed. Plus, everyone who can’t afford to live in the Bay any more will be moving to Sac soon anyway, right? I spent two long days at Cal Expo, and ended the weekend feeling a bit like a state fair carnie. Saturday, I earned my keep working the MotoWheels /AGV booth, selling helmets after a crash course in features and sizing from the AGV rep. When I wasn’t talking about the MotoGP soap opera with visitors to the booth, I was wearing down the battery on the demo unit of AGV’s new LCD face shield, which goes dark at the press of a button. Sunday, I loitered at the stunt and supermoto areas when it wasn’t raining, It sounds good to him and we stroll towards the show. He introduces himself as Greg, tells me his brother is inside and offers to buy me a beer. As we enter, we’re pointed past some ATVs and Slingshots to where we can get a free calendar. “They want your name, phone number and credit card info for everything,” says Greg. Sure enough, we have to divulge name, rank and serial numbers for any and all promotional items and activities. “I should’ve brought a stamp,” says Greg as we fill out slips to receive our free swag. We wander through some of the show-bikes that are peppered near the walk ways, and in short order we meet up with his brother, Brian, who’s wearing a red textile adventure jacket. We get to talking about bikes. I’d assumed they were Harley riders, but it turns out Photo: An DeYoung they’re here on matching BMW K1200GTs. helmets—and better laid out. No halfThey’ve ridden through the south on them empty buildings this time. together. I talked with Makoto Endo, who spent all three days painting a beautiful custom Indian portrait with chopsticks. $1,500 and he’ll do your bike too. If I had a firstborn I’d sell it for one of those paintings. For me, the highlight of weekend was seeing Erin Sills, the AMA’s Female Athlete of the Year, talk about going 209 MPH at Bonneville. After playing with the electric slot cars Progressive has set up, we wander over to the Suzuki area, where Brian reveals his ambition to ride to Alaska. I point him towards the V-Strom 1000 which, for the dollar, is a hard package to beat. KTM is the most notably absent manufacturer, and there’s no obvious sign of Yamaha, either. - An DeYoung The largest booths were those of Sam: As Always, Making Friends Kawasaki, Suzuki, and BMW. The Everywhere He Goes Bavarians brought their A game, with a booth that seemed larger and It’s well past dark when I get to the latest more permanent than apartments and greatest two-wheeled-toy show in I’ve rented. They also had virtual Sacramento. I park next to a Slingshot I’d reality goggles. And though I wanted seen on the way there—at least it’s the same ride the computerized dirt road whilst color. The driver had waved at me, which straddling the latest GS, the brand gave me pause. I never know quite how ambassador insisted I speed down their to feel about the three-wheeled open-air digital race track. vehicles; the Can-ams, the trikes. I mean, they’re not motorcycles, but they’re not The experience really did remind me of cars. They fall somewhere next to scooters: track riding, highly tuned vision, trying definitely an improvement on four-wheeled to ignore other sensations while drawing travel, but not really in the same club. We your line, turning to look at the other don’t understand all the same jokes. riders and then gazing down to see the red and white warning curbs flash by, the A group of bro-y dudes walking by share colors blurring almost to purple in the VR my sentiment. “That’s kinda cool,” says a goggles. tall, athletic guy in a Harley Davidson ball cap. “I’d mod it.” We head to the second exhibition hall to see the vendors. While some shows have “I wouldn’t waste my time,” says his friend, been a big-American-twin circle-jerk of who looks like a chubby version of Fred plastic, made-in-China accessories for the Durst in his white t-shirt and red baseball weekend outlaw biker, the IMS show is cap. full of stuff that I actually wanted to buy— including CSC’s Cyclone, a mini wanna“C’mon, if they gave it to you for free?” Beemer bike, made in China, that can be “You’d see me on that Vespa first.” delivered to your doorstep for around four grand. As I walk towards the ticket booth and turnstiles, I look around for someone to But there aren’t many new bikes treat with my spare ticket. A tall man with we CityBikers haven’t already seen, white hair and goatee, in an H-D jacket and although Ducati’s Diavel Carbon has me jeans is also walking towards the entrance. daydreaming of wheelies between the cafes “Hey man. Already got a ticket? I got an extra if you want.” of North Beach on the overpowered naked behemoth. Release dates for most of the manufacturers are just a few weeks away. December 2015 | 8 | CityBike.com We’ll have to see what the SoCal show, and of course EICMA, have in store for us. “You know, most motorcyclists are good people,” says Greg as we leave. “Yeah,” I say, “and most of ‘em have their shit together a little bit more than other folks.” “Well yeah! You’re out there on the road!” This moment reveals that, more than anything—more than the hype, than the corporate sponsorship, more than the cast bronze gecko on the Roland Sands Designs Geico Indian scrambler—the IMS is a gathering place for the like-minded. Their promotional hashtag is #RidersUnite, and damned if it isn’t true. We were there to talk, touch and ogle the two-wheeled toys, together. We were kids in a bike store. Screw candy. Let’s ride. - Sam Devine New Stuff Gearhead To-do List By Sam Devine If you’re reading CityBike, the odds are that you’re probably a gearhead. You’re moved by things that move in more ways than one. Bikes are obvious, but you might also be into trains, planes and automobiles. And that means you’ll most likely enjoy the book 100 Things for Every Gearhead to Do Before They Die, by Jason Fogelson. Broken up into small entries, the book is easy to flip through and find something quick to read. Whether on the train to work or while taking a solo business meeting on the porcelain throne, it’s a good timepasser. It also makes a good reference book when planning trips. Have a business junket in Ohio? Maybe you can sneak away to the American Motorcycle Museum for an afternoon. Riding down to LA? Perhaps you’d enjoy taking the Angeles Crest Scenic Byway. Sure, you could just Google “motorcycle museums” and “good motorcycle roads.” But Gearhead to Do lays it out for you. It’s a well organized list of awesome roads, events and destinations, that’s easy to search through and spin dreams from. This fun little tome might also hip readers to things they wouldn’t otherwise think to search for, something that Google can’t really offer. The book may be a little car-heavy for some of the motorcyclists out there, but Fogelson’s not talking about the best way to get stuck behind a Prius in traffic. He’s talking about salt flats, racetracks and vintage rallies. There are also short, fun interviews with famous gear geeks like Adam Ferrara from Top Gear USA. This is compression gear, so it’s meant to be super-snug. There’s no easy way to get into it—just take it slow. It’s very silky, which makes it a bit easier to get into. Still, a little yoga might help. Once on, it’s like a second skin. There are soft mesh inserts behind the knees, under the arms, and down the back, and the seams are flat so it’s comfortable and easy to move in. I was initially worried about the top staying put, but there’s a band of grippy silicone along the lower part to keep it from riding up once you tuck it in against your skin. VN M Inside Since flipping around through Gearhead to Do, I’ve learned a thing or two. As a wanky San Franciscan with a penchant for consuming synthetic drugs and dancing in the desert, I’ve spent plenty of time on the Black Rock Desert Playa. But no one ever mentioned that it’s the largest piece of flat land in the world—or that they hold time trials there. Nope, they just said: “Here, take these. They make body feel good— like on fire, but good.” trackdays, and easy to grab when packing up. %&$'"(() ! "#$ I started the 2015 season with the VNM baselayers and a new Helimot suit to break in. The VNM gear made it easy to slide into my new suit, even on the hottest days. It’s made of a “technologically advanced fabric” that “feels like air conditioning” because of the tiny honeycombs that help increase cooling. The fabric dries in minutes, less if there’s a breeze. My leathers are not perforated, so its extraimportant that my track underthings are effective at keeping me cool. Wearing the VNM gear, I could drop the top in a cooler of melting ice, wear it for a session to keep cool, and once off the track, drop my leathers—the VNM layer kept me cool as it dried. Priced at $18, 100 Things for Every Gearhead to Do Before They Die is worth buying for your reference library or giving as a stocking stuffer. I know it would keep me happy and quiet by the fire while waiting for dinner. Now what was that Colorado road it mentioned? It’s also got SPF 50 protection from the sun— great for walking around and socializing the pits without worry of sunburn. I’ve worn my VNM gear every trackday this year, and it’s held up really well—even against the Velcro I keep catching it on when I’m rushing into my leathers. If I can force $18. Softcover, 160 pages, 9” x 5.8”. Get your copy at booksforgearheads.com. VNM Sport Gear By An DeYoung Late last year I started looking for a different baselayer to wear under my trackday leathers. The one-piece I’d been wearing was nice, but I wanted a two-piece because, well… one-piece baselayers aren’t as easy for women to deal with as a twopiece in certain situations. I’ll just leave it at that. e l a S ay items d f stock i l o H % of ts duc d pro to 50 rcefiel 015 30%excluding Fo r 1-31, 2 mbe Dece I found VNM Sportgear. Woman rider / racer-owned, and now made in San Jose— sounds great. I got in touch with the owner, Aliki, the aforementioned rider / racer, and she helped me with sizing. I placed my order, with the promise I could return anything that didn’t fit right. My new baselayers arrived soon after, in reusable snappy plastic bags (these have since been upgraded to a softer plastic with a much better zip opening), which are nice for keeping track of of the pieces between December 2015 | 9 | CityBike.com myself to be more careful with the Velcro, I’ll bet my VNM gear will last me a few more years of trackdays. I’ve kept in touch with Aliki, and I’m really excited about what she’s been doing with VNM lately. In addition to riding at tracks all over North America to promote VNM, she’s put together templates so riders can have a hand in designing their own custom baselayers. Pick the color to match your bike, add your name or race number. I’m The Forcefield and the Armour Flex Back achieves level 2, the highest pass possible against the latest European draft standard ref: prEN1621-2 which is officially known as “Motorcyclists Protective Clothing against mechanical impacts-part 2”. For body Armor (elbow, shoulder, knee and hip) Four Layer Armour outperforms current standards EN1621-1 (1997) by 90% (100 joules) on the dual layer. The EN1621-1 requires that given an impact energy of 50 joules, no more than 35KN of force should be transmitted. thinking we need CityBike Wrecking Crew Gear! Aliki has also teamed up with a Vet2Track (“PTSD vs. GSXR” – News, Clues and Rumors, September 2015), and is raising funds to help Vets with PTSD get on track by selling custom Vet2Track base layers. That’s definitely not the case here. I reckon Reg could have found multiple publishers to do this thing, if he’d wanted to. It’s quite good, in a common sense kinda way. You know how you practice and practice, until you’re looking so far through your turns that you can see a female $97.99 per piece. Learn more at vnmsportgear.com. neural net processor—it helps. Periodic review of the basics helps with skill development, whether you’re practicing emergency braking in the vast asphalt wastelands of the old base in Alameda or taking a few minutes to mindfully consider your riding tactics, when you’re not riding. Our 2nd 50 doesn’t cover a lot of new material, but what it does do is tie a lot of good material together in a nice little package for easy review. And it’s good reading—Reg is the quintessential straight shooter. And he quotes a Cake song, a band I worked sound for once back in the nineties. A damn fine reason to buy this book, if you ask me. Is There Moto-life After 50? By Surj Gish Reg Kittrelle, long-time moto-industry guy, founder of Thunder Press, and—of course—CityBike reader, found himself getting old. Not in years, although at 72, he’s got a few of those—50 of ‘em on bikes. Rather, he found his riding getting sloppy, and in trying to figure out why, and how to fix this, decided to write it all down. Type it, actually, and turn it into a book. And then he did the layout of the book himself, too, and self-published it. The result: Motorcycles And Our 2nd 50 years – An Owner’s Manual For Riders Over 50. The book promptly sold out the first pressing. Second one is nearly gone too, with a third printing is on its way. Being CityBike, we’re big fans of this sort of “I don’t need a publisher to put this thing president, and then the next day, you find out” kinda thing, so Reg gets a great big yourself gazing at the double yellow about high five from us, just for that. Problem is, a lot of self-publishing happens because the arms-length ahead of you, mid-turn? shit being published is, well… shit. Point is, doing some reading, thinking about this stuff consciously, resetting your The topics covered include an introduction of who the intended audience—again, riders over 50—and the typical physiological changes riders in this age range experience, a discussion of fitness and food and their effects on riding, and of course, bikes, gear, and a multitude of other stuff, like sleep, vision, getting found if you get lost, and proper first aid. Reading Our 2nd 50 is kinda like going for a ride with Reg, but it’s a mellow ride, with lots of stops where we just hang out, check out the view, and get thoughtful, bite-sized doses of his copious wisdom, acquired across the aforementioned 50 years of riding. Here’s the kicker—Our 2 50 isn’t just for riders of “a certain age.” Or it doesn’t have December 2015 | 10 | CityBike.com nd to be. Sure, he talks about this stuff in ways that apply to older riders, but most of the topics apply to riders of all ages. I’m not (quite) in the target age range, although I sometimes feel like it, but I found myself nodding along with Reg’s narrative several times: “Yeah, dammit. I’d rider better if I was a bit (a lot) more fit.” “Yeah, I shouldn’t eat such garbage-y food on the road.” There’s a companion website, motorcyclesand2nd50.com, that Reg hopes to be something of a destination for older riders, with resources, a forum, a blog, news and more. You can of course order the book there too. Look, it’d be easy to recommend Our 2nd 50 purely on the merits of Reg being a cool guy—for example, he gave us a bunch of helmets for the helmet research project we did last year (“The Truth About Helmets” – November 2014), including his beautiful, ancient Bell Star that we just couldn’t bear to bash on the testing apparatus. And like I said, we love this DIY self-publishing stuff. But we’d be selling Reg and his book short if we did that. Fact is, no matter how old you are, if you care about being a better rider, a better whole rider, Motorcycles And Our 2nd 50 belongs on your bookshelf, next to all those books about cornering technique. $19.95. Softcover, 224 pages, 9” x 6”. Get your copy at motorcyclesand2nd50.com. EVENTS December 2015 2nd Sunday of each month: Santa Cruz Scooter Club Monthly Group Ride (Fin’s Coffee, 1104 Ocean Street, Santa Cruz, CA 95060) Meet at 11:00 AM. Route depends on who shows, the weather, and how much time folks have. Rides will be cancelled due to rain. santacruzscooterclub.com / facebook.com/SantaCruzScooterClub Ducati Bike Nights! All brands and models of motorcycles are welcome. Get more information at NorCalDoc.com. 1st Monday of each month: Mill Valley 6:00 to 10:00 PM at The Cantina, 651 E. Blithedale Ave, Mill Valley. More information: 415.378.8317. 1st Wednesday of each month: San Francisco Ducati Bike Night 6:00 to 10:00 PM at Pier 23 Seafood Cafe, Pier 23, The Embarcadero, San Francisco, CA 94111. More information: 415.362.5125. 1st Sunday of each month: North Bay 6:30 to 9:30 PM at Benissimo, 18 Tamalpais Dr, Corte Madera. 2nd Monday of each month: South Bay 6:00 to 10:00 PM at Pizza Antica, 334 Santana Row, #1065 San Jose. More information: 408.557.8373. 2nd Tuesday of each month: East Bay 6:30 PM till whenever at Pizza Antica, 3600 Mt Diablo Blvd, Lafayette. More information: 925.299.0500. 3rd Wednesday of each month: Emeryville 6:00 to 10:00 PM at Hot Italian, 5959 Shellmound Street, No. 75, Emeryville. More information: 510.652.9300. 4th Monday of each month: Sacramento 6:00 to 10:00 PM at Hot Italian, 1627 16th Street, Sacramento. More information: 916.444.3000. 4th Monday of each month: MidPeninsula 5:00 to 10:00 PM at Sixto’s Cantina, 1448 Burlingame. More information: 650.342.7600. 4th Friday of each month: Concord 6:00 to 10:00 PM at Lazy Dog Café, 1961 Diamond Blvd, Concord. More information: 925.849.1221. 4th Saturday of each month: Novato 6:00 to 10:00 PM at Boca Pizzeria, 454 Ignacio Blvd, Novato. More information: 415.883.2302. 3rd Sunday of each month: Northern California Moto Guzzi National Owners Club Breakfast (Putah Creek Cafe, 1 Main St, Winters, CA 95694) MGNOC members and interested Guzzi riders meet at 9:00 AM for breakfast and good times. Photo: Surj Gish More information: contact Northern California MGNOC Representative, Don Van Zandt at 707.557.5199. Check our Facebook page for details as we 333 Corey Way, South San Francisco, CA figure ‘em out: facebook.com/citybikemag 94080) December 6, 2015: 32nd Annual Toy Run (Dudley-Perkins H-D, 333 Corey Way, South San Francisco, CA 94080) Annual Christmas festivities at DudleyPerkins: pictures with Santa, snacks, hot beverages, and of course, Harleys. dpchd. com/custompage2.asp?pg=events January 9, 2016: 3rd Annual Motorcycle Unification Rally (West Steps of the Capital Building, 1315 10th Street, Sacramento, California 95814) Motorcyclists from all walks, err…rides of life will descend on the California State Capital for the third annual Unification Rally, to show strength of voice and unity. Show up to help make our voices heard, to Ride with Richard empower and mobilize in the Dudley-Perkins’ annual toy run to SF and Kathy from RKA for a good cause! protection of our freedoms. facebook. General Hospital. Please bring unwrapped Donations of food or money get you a nice com/unificationrally2016 toys for the children at the hospital. $20— ride along the coast and through wine January 30, 2016: Monster Energy includes breakfast and run pin. dpchd. country to Sonoma Raceway for lunch and Supercross (O.co Coliseum, 7000 com/custompage2.asp?pg=events a few laps ‘round the track. rka-luggage. Coliseum Way, Oakland, CA 94621) com/A15%20Events/2015%20food%20 December 6, 2015: MMA Swap Meet Supercross comes to the East Bay. Doors (Dixon Fairgrounds, 655 S 1st St, Dixon, dr/fooddrive2015.html open at noon for practice and qualifying, CA 95620) November 22, 2015: Any Two Wheels main event at 6:30. Tickets start at $15. (Speakeasy Brewery, 1195 Evans Ave, San This is the old Cow Palace Swap Meet supercrosslive.com relocated to the Dixon Fairgrounds. Free Francisco, CA 94124) Want your event in our calendar? Send a note admission, five bux for parking. Vendor Open invite bike competition / show. spots are $50, with electricity. Gates open to [email protected] with details like Bring your cool bike—chopper, fixie, who, what, when, where, why and we’ll add at 10 AM. Rain or shine. mma-ca.org sportbike, scooter, whatever—if it it. Maybe. If it’s something cool. Send your December 11, 2015: Christmas has two wheels, we want to see it! stuff early—more notice is better. Extravaganza (Dudley-Perkins H-D, pointykittyproduction.com November 21, 2015: 15th Annual RKA Luggage Sonoma Raceway Food Drive Ride (7694 Bell Road, Windsor, CA 95492) November 22, 2015: Richmond Ramblers Bearfoot Family Enduro (Mendocino National Forest, CA) The AMA-District 36 Bearfoot Family Enduro takes place the weekend before Thanksgiving at Fouts Springs in Mendocino National Forest, also known as Stonyford. richmondramblersmc. org/events.html November 27, 2015: CityBike “Ride Friday Give Back” Anti-Black Friday Ride (Middle Harbor Shoreline Park, 2777 Middle Harbor Rd, Oakland, CA 94607) We’re not real organized yet, but we kept having these “fuck Black Friday, let’s go riding” conversations around CityBike HQ and decided that instead of just spitting potty-mouthed rebellion into the wind, we’d make a thing of it. Ride Friday Give Back or whatever. So here’s the deal: we’re gonna meet at Middle Harbor Shoreline Park at 10 AM on Black Friday and head out for a mellow ride, most likely through the East Bay hills, and end up at Lanesplitter in Emeryville for pizza and hang time. Our good pals at LaneSplitter will cover the first ten tasty pies. We’re asking for at least a $20 donation from each rider, and we’ll be giving the entire amount to CASA of Alameda County. You can learn more about CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocates) at casaofalamedacounty. org. December 2015 | 11 | CityBike.com By Sam Devine Photos by Bob Stokstad & Max Klein W e ripped the KTM 390 Duke around Thunderhill Raceway’s East course, split through San Francisco traffic and rode it down various Interstates. And we’re happy to report that the Li’l Duke is a fun bike for just about anyone. Only the largest or most jaded of riders will find it lacking in power and stature—most riders will consider it a featherweight runabout, a nimble good time, Sir Duke in the Small Displacement Kingdom. over because they were already ogling the bike’s orange wheels and trellis frame when I signaled my lane change. This is the type of bike you park by a cafe, grab a coffee and listen to the comments roll in—even from people generally disinterested in motoculture. motocross handlebar pairing takes a few minutes to get used to. It’s like what Garth said about his chonies: “At first it’s constrictive, but after a while it becomes a part of you.” Initially, it’s easy to wind up weighing heavy on the wide handlebar. The real way to get comfy on this bike is to get up on the pegs—this gives a riding position that makes you feel like a bulldog. “Naw, I think it’s a Japanese bike. Or maybe Afterwards, once you get back in the one of those Italian ‘Bucatis.’” saddle, the slightly-rearward foot position even makes more sense. By the time I hit Actually it’s an Austrian-designed bike the toll plaza, I was feeling one with the made in India by Bajaj Auto Ltd, which bike. owns a big chunk of KTM. Topping out around 100 mph (the speedo said 95 on the Whipping the 390 Duke towards The WP suspension is cushy, offering straights at Thunderhill), it’s supposedly downtown SF, hard rock blasting in my 150mm of travel on the inverted forks. And one of the fastest bike currently made in helmet, Oak Street turned into a dance it has decent ground clearance, leaving me floor. I found myself grooving between the India. Number one with a Bullet (Anyone? no hesitation in taking the mini-motard off cars, digging how high its sideview mirrors Royal Enfield pun? Is this thing on?). curbs and through bumpy gravel parking are, easily clearing the mirrors of most cars The 390 uses the same frame as the KTM lots. Fooling around in a parking lot also while splitting. The flapping exhaust note 200, a bike popular in India. But the motor revealed it to be a tiny wheelie machine. All from its abbreviated pipe grunted like a crammed into this little frame is 373 cubic this and its willing powertrain earned it 4 boar; loud enough to get attention in high out of 5 stars on our “You-Punks-Get-Offcentimeters. So why is it called a 390? revs but quiet enough outside the power My-Lawn” Hooligan-o-meter. Sounds bigger and better. Whatever the band to let the neighbors sleep when I got reason is, it’s probably also why Honda It’s only questionable feature is its seat, home late. dubbed their inline-736ccwhich is hard and slippery. It reminds powered bike the CB750. It took some effort with the throttle me of a plastic bouncy horse from and shifter, but the Li’l Duke could be a McDonald’s playground. But, All in all, the Baby persuaded to jump off the line as fast as just Duke’s ergonomics thanks to the suspension and about anything else I encountered. With a are comfy and component positions that claimed 26 ft-lbs of torque, it sprung ahead fun, but the facilitate stand-up riding, it of cabs and entitled, luxury sedan drivers proved comfortable enough sport-style peg with little difficulty. Unfortunately, once on trips beyond The City’s position above 45 mph, it has the passing power of a and borders, like the southeast bay Honda Civic. area. And I took 580—arguably one of the worst stretches of But it’s not entirely gutless, especially interstate in this country. considering it’s rolling with just 373 Though it by no means cubes—it’s snappy and has a good dominated the superslab, command, ranging to 80mph. Duke Jr. provided a capable For what it lacks in speed, it makes up in eye-catching flashiness. With its blocky angles, it looks like the whole thing was built by a 3-D printer, angled like a jewel—this is the bike some evil, crystal sci-fi character would ride. “Wow. Look at that thing. Harley?” Sure, it may not have enough power to muscle around dawdling cars on the interstate, but drivers often let me merge ride out to Livermore, handling the patchy asphalt and hectic traffic with no noticeable issues— at least none that couldn’t be solved by more displacement. But with higher displacement comes a bigger price tag and this nano-nakedcycle is absolutely affordable at $4,999. And its price tag isn’t the only thing that’s accessible about it. Weighing in at 340 lbs soaking wet, the mini-Duke is the type of scoot you can pick up and put in your pocket after you drop it. Its Bosch 9MB dual channel ABS also helps keep things safe. And it won’t kill you at the pump, either—it sips gas slow enough to clock in the +50mpg zone. Though the little Duke is built to tackle urban environments, this machine is barely out of the woods. Dirt riding is just in its KTM DNA, as evident in its wide handlebar and upright riding posture. Want to do some light off-roading? Slap some knobbies on that puppy and go rip a fire trail or two! More aggressive dirt riding would require a beefier skid plate and longer suspension, especially for bigger bikers. But for smaller riders, this could really be your one-stop shop for track bike, street bike and sortaoff-roader. Then again, you might just want to wait for the rumored 390 Adventure. So sure, the Duke-ito won’t be setting any land speed records, and won’t have you power-cruising the freeway like a spectre or Norse god amongst the mortals, but it’s a blast to tool around on and cuts through the crowds better than a puking debutant. If you find a more versatile bike for less money, make an appointment to see it as soon as you can and then flag, flag, flag that Craigslist posting. Sam is CityBike’s newest columnist (check out page 20 for his latest), and our resident “bashin’ bikes ‘round the city proper-like” guy. Duke Of Awesome By Max Klein When I first turned the Duke’s key and saw “Ready to Race” flash up on the dash, I literally laughed out loud. “Seriously KTM, you’re drinking your own Kool-Aid now?” Little did I know how delicious I’d find that Kool-Aid just minutes later. It all started a couple of months ago in Southern California, chillin’ and killing time before a press event. I decided to go for a little ride out to the Rock Store. I scanned the map, got the gist of where I was headed and took off. Sort of. I tried to take off. After laughing at the start up message, I put my feet up where I expected to find the pegs on an upright standard, which caused me to apply the rear brake (fortunately) and drop the tranny into first (not-sofortunately) stalling the bike. Turns out that the riding position is not “upright standard” so much as “aggressive standard.” The pegs are up and back putting you into what might be termed the “Ready to Race Stance.” Photo: Bob Stokstad Well played, KTM. December 2015 | 12 | CityBike.com KTM: “We do swingarms right.” It’s a bitchin’ track bike, too. Photo: Bob Stokstad Photo: Max Klein With a double beep of the horn and a single thumbs up (I think it was my thumb) I was left to enjoy the road on my own. By this Photo: Bob Stokstad point, I’d become a big fan of this little bike, and part of me was a little bummed white leathers with our flying eyeball on ‘em. that I’d have to leave it behind to go ride Pretty flashy, Slick. Ducatis for the rest of the day. Photo: Bob Stokstad Once I sorted this “sitting on the bike” thing out, I hit the road and soon found myself at a stoplight next to a hot, older redhead in an even hotter Jag. I was too busy checking out the cougar’s Jaguar to notice when the light changed and was forced to filter in behind her as the road narrowed. Fortunately for me, she was not afraid to put the hammer down and for the next five minutes or so I had a carrot(top) to chase—it was obvious she knew the road. Despite its diminutive displacement, the 390 Duke matched the Jag’s additional cylinders corner for corner, until she turned off into her gated community. It’s a tough life, I tell ya. Meet My New Friend Chuckles A bit later in the month, the CityBike Wrecking Crew took turns flogging both the 390 Duke and the RC 390 out at Thunderhill Raceway. I was able to keep the Duke powering ahead of Sam on the RC through the corners, but the lack of aerodynamic bodywork allowed him to catch right back up in the three fast sections. We swapped bikes and I could see why, as my top speed down the front straight on the RC was 110 and climbing, where the Duke was pulling to 95 and staying there. By Gwynne Fitzsimmons I liked the Duke a lot, right out of the box. The 25 mm of additional suspension travel up front (150 mm compared to the RC’s 125 mm—both have 150 mm out back) made the stock stuff bearable in all situations, but let’s face it, anyone over 170ish pounds is going to want an upgrade. The only other downside was my face kept hitting the mirrors on the track. Wait… what I mean is, when I was riding on the track, my face kept hitting the mirror on the bike. There were no mirrors on the track itself. Every now and then, I throw a leg over a bike and start thinking of personalized plates. Such was the case with the “little” 390 Duke. doesn’t matter—it’s a whole new take on “play bike.” At the end of my all-too-brief relationship with the little Duke, it hit me: “CHUCKLES.” Yeah, I know—too many letters, but Chuckles, that freaky, scary, twisted birthday clown, the one that haunts you into adulthood… that’s the guy. He’s pretty My initial thought was “GIGGLS” but after funny, but watch out, he can get you into a few miles, I realized that giggling implied serious(ly fun) trouble! innocent, fleeting fun. This bike is worthy If you’ve had a CityBike in your hands of something darker, deeper, perhaps a bit recently, there’s a good chance Gwynne had it more sinister. first. She’s basically CityBike’s “time to make After a 120 sweet, slicing miles in the the doughnuts” guy—she helps make sure the hills of Marin, I came to think of the little mag gets into all those red racks. Duke more like the pony that many a child dreams of riding, owning, befriending; a perfectly proportioned, slightly miniature version of the big one, the one that’s too expensive, and too tall to reach the ground on anyway. Turning the key, to be welcomed by the “Ready to Race” salutation (or is it a question?) from the bike is an indicator of the good times to come. The Duke snaps to with a mere twist of the throttle, snorting, cursing from its pipe. Inspiring all kinds of unsuitable behavior, the 390 doesn’t so much roll as leap off the After a few laps of this, I pretended I was line. Its quick throttle response and crisp the Kool-Aid Man and started yelling “OH, brakes allow the ass end to joyfully fishtail YEAAHH!” down a newly chip sealed road. Max is the SF Chapter Director of the The Duke makes me want to seek out AFM and the only member of the CityBike trouble. Hmm… “TRBLMKR” won’t fit Wrecking Crew currently sporting custom on a plate. But fallen leaves, gravel, puddles, December 2015 | 13 | CityBike.com KTM RC 390, AKA “Li’l Ricky” By Max Klein Photos by Bob Stokstad & Max Klein B ack in grade school there was this kid named Jonathan Janke. He was smaller than average, talked with a spitting lisp, and had a big nose. By all rights he should have been bullied relentlessly by the cool kids. After all, this was the early eighties—he was a walking “kick me” sign. Despite the trifecta of obvious bully fodder, he—somehow—was the cool kid. It helped that his parents had a bit of money, and because of that he had the best clothes, just about every Transformer/ Atari 2600 game on the planet, plus a pinball machine in his basement. The kicker was that he always wanted to do fun and somewhat dangerous stuff, and he would poke… poke… poke… until you were on board. Remind me to tell you about the time he got one of the older kids to jump his brother’s snowmobile over Pike Creek some time… well, most of the way over. KTM’s RC 390 is the motorcycle equivalent of Jonathan Janke. First off, not only is this thing powered by a small displacement motor, it’s an odd number at that. The “390” is the same 373cc single that is in the Duke 390. A claimed 44 horsepower and 26 foot pounds of torque are toy-like in comparison to the cool crowd’s 200 HP rocketships. But just when you are about ready to give the RC (An calls it “Li’l Ricky”) a wedgie and walk away, you notice its style game is on point. It looks like a race bike—the orange trellis frame and fairings are straight out of the closet of its big brother, the RC8. The pillion seat is shaped to resemble the tail of a race bike as well. Turn the key and the RC starts with the peer pressure: “Ready To Race” flashes up on the dash before you even thumb the starter. *POKE* I never took it easy on this bike. I tried, believe me I tried, but the bike really wanted me to do fun—sometimes risky— stuff. And the shift light was constantly taunting me (constaunting?), all like, “Didn’t you hear me? I said Ready To Race back there and YOU ARE NOT RACING!” *POKE* Then there’s the dash feature telling you how long you’ve been riding, giving you your average speed… based on how long the motor has been running, even at fiveminute long stoplights, of which I hit three of en route to Editor Surj’s house while piloting the RC. Nothing stings more than your bike telling you, “Hey, you’ve been riding for 45 minutes on the freeway and your average speed is 20 mph.” “Aww, how cute…Did I or did I not say I was READY TO RACE?” *POKE* The 43mm WP forks lack adjustability and the WP shock only offers a preload twistyring. Since I am about 20-ish pounds heavier than what the boingers were built for, you’re probably expecting me to bitch about the horrible, budget bits-induced handling. How it bounced me around and wallowed mid corner. I’d love to, but the RC’s bits were much more forgiving than the stock suspension on some of the other lightweights I’ve ridden recently. It also felt lighter than the claimed 324-pound dry weight, which certainly helped with the handling. But given that the target market for this bike is the noob core, the budget parts make perfect sense. The binders are more than adequate at cruising speeds, but on the track, I’d like a bit more. The ABS worked well and did not get in the way, While it might not be exactly lisp-y, the sound of a single coming from a “sportbike” also doesn’t fit into the in-crowd’s multicylinder aural orgy. Much like Jonathan Janke’s nose, there is something not quite right about the front of this bike. The headlights don’t look bad, just slightly out of place. Photo: Bob Stokstad December 2015 | 14 | CityBike.com which seems to be more and more the norm as the technology becomes more common. I was surprisingly comfortable on the RC. Even at 6’ 1” I didn’t turn into a walking cramp after a long ride—although a “long ride” on this bike is subjective. The only time my height became an issue was when I was trying to tuck behind the bubble on the straights—I ended up with my ass on the pillion seat. Since the bike is constantly poking you to go faster, the RC’s little fuel tank doesn’t get you very far. 10 liters sounds like a lot, until you convert it to proper American gallons, of which you get 2.6. On a spirited ride ’round Lake Berryessa, I was able to go about 110 miles before the dreaded “miles till you’re walking” countdown began. I was bummed about the mileage, but my average speed was… well, let’s go with spirited. Even big dudes like Editor Surj can get down on the RC. Photo: Bob Stokstad My only other real complaint about the RC 390 is the mirrors. I couldn’t really get them adjusted so I could see behind me in my around town riding position. To get a good view behind me, I’d have to get into a full…race…tuck… Ready? Well played, KTM. Well played. Max is the guy in the white Dainese leathers with the red CityBike logo on the back. The only one. An & Li’l Ricky, Sitting In A Tree By An DeYoung The trackday at Thunderhill started with Max helping me unload my 748. “Does your clutch always feel like this?” This unhappy sentence turned into me spending the day on the KTM RC 390, Li’l Ricky. Yes, I named it. Him. I knew about this bike from the pictures my husband showed me months ago. “We need this.” Yeah… I’m 6 feet tall. What am I going to do on that little thing? I’ll look like a circus bear riding a toothpick. Fast forward to broken trackbike day at Thunderhill. There’s a KTM key in my hand and a wide open track in front of me. I wound out each gear. Distracting—pass the duct tape, please. Photo: Bob Stokstad An and Li’l Ricky at T-Hill. Li’l Ricky is so light I didn’t have to force him into corners—I leaned, and he just went. Once, I felt myself going wide, and a little whisper in his ear had Ricky right back into line. On we went. Li’l Ricky and I rode every session we could, and loved our time together. Even with my height, for street riding the pegs would be fine, but I’d mount some rearsets for the track. Another minor annoyance was the sidestand, which comes up right under the left peg—so trying to find it with your foot when you are in a hurry to park and use the bathroom between sessions is kind of a pain in the ass. Again, rearsets would solve that issue. Photo: Max Klein Really, the most serious problem I had with Li’l Ricky, that ultimately—unhappily— ended our relationship, was that Editor Surj made me give it back. An is Leader Of The Sac. Wait… we weren’t supposed to use that—too “dirty-sounding” or some such. So… An is CityBike’s onewoman Sacramento operation. Don’t tell her we mentioned that thing about The Sac, ok? RC Shakedown By Sam Devine Even though it’s white and orange, this little rocket isn’t instantly recognizable as OK, twist my arm. I’ll give it a try. a KTM. But once on board, it makes itself quickly apparent as a fun, sporty little You know that saying, the one about how ripper. The body positioning on it was just it’s more fun riding a slow bike fast than a right for my 5’6” frame but there’s a nice fast bike slow? Consider it confirmed by triangulation between seat, bar and pegs yours truly. that reportedly makes it a comfortable bike Li’l Ricky’s little motor doesn’t have a for riders of most sizes. I think it weighs whole lot of torque or engine braking, so I something like three or four pounds really had to change my style from what I’m and accelerates like a lap dog chasing a used to doing on the old Duc. On the 390 pigeon, which is to say, remarkably quick, I actually had to shift, and sometimes even especially for its little engine’s diminutive use the brakes. I had to think more about size. It’s as much fun per pound as any gohow my riding. kart, but it’s street legal. Photo: Bob Stokstad Photo: Bob Stokstad It’s not super fast, but neither am I. Still, the With its slightly larger displacement, it shift indicator flashed at me constantly as has a bit more kick than the Kawi’s Photo: Bob Stokstad December 2015 | 15 | CityBike.com smallest Ninja or Yamaha’s R3. I’ll be surprised if these aren’t soon the race bike of choice in small displacement categories. Compared to the R3, though, I found the pegs on the RC and (especially) the li’l Duke easy to scrape. Magnanimous Max Klein blames my body positioning, saying I wasn’t off the bike enough and I’m inclined to believe him. But it also seems to speak to just how easy these bikes are to whip around. Leaning these mini-motos over is as easy as turning on a lightswitch. I was having such a blast with the RC in our session out at Thunderhill that I blew my focus and lowsided it in turn 6. That’s right: I crashed the dang thing on an easy turn. For shame! rest of the bike, including the plastics and the seat showed remarkably little worseness for the wear. The rear end hit the warning track hard enough to pinch a hole in the sidewall, but the rim survived unscathed. On the straight, the RC could get to just about 100 mph, slightly faster than the naked little Duke. The only place I found the RC’s performance lacking was while going up the hill towards Thunderhill’s turn 9. It just couldn’t power up the incline in 6th gear, so I kept wringing it out in 5th. That reminds me: the first thing I would do if I bought either the Duke or the RC would be to put a piece of duct tape over the shift-indicator light. This big red bulb feels like the largest thing on the dash and But I gotta admit: the little RC took it like it’s pretty much on all the time if you ride a champ. The shift lever, turn signal and at all aggressively. It freaked me out more side-view mirror had to be replaced, but the than once as I looked down—I thought I had blown the oil pump! But beginners will find it a good indicator of when to shift safely, helping them get the most life out of their engine. The RC 390 is a good buy for a new rider, or an experienced one looking to get into racing. Just don’t let me near it… One of Sam’s bikes is orange, but— If you really want to turn this into a somehow—not a KTM. race bike, it’ll need a bit of a suspension upgrade. My 170lbs was able to bottom it out while accelerating out of turn 5, scraping the bottom of the fairing. But then I was pushing the little RC to its limit, and a little beyond. But smaller, saner riders that stay safely just away from the edge will find this to be a well set-up, mini-mighty motorcycle. KTM is also making a race-ready version of the bike called the RC 390 Cup that comes without mirrors, Photo: Bob Stokstad signals and ABS. Sam chases An out at Thunderhill. Photo: Max Klein 8na^cYZg=ZVY HeZX^Va^hih >c7jh^cZhhH^cXZ&.,- 6aaBV`Zh 6aaBdYZah 6aaNZVgh :C<>C:9NC6B>8H!AA8 E]dcZ,%,",+(",*&. ;Vm,%,",+("(,*. lll#Zc\^cZYncVb^Xh#Xdb s&LOW"ENCH4ESTINGs#OMPETITION6ALVE*OBSs s6ALVE3EAT'UIDE2EPLACEMENTs2ACE0REPs s0ORTINGs0OLISHINGs 2040 Petaluma Blvd. N.Petaluma, CA 94952 Daily Commuter? Weekend Rider? Poser? SUPPORT LANE SPLITTING STICKERS - NEWS - RESOURCES LaneSplittingIsLegal.com December 2015 | 16 | CityBike.com to get CityBike delivered to your door by the meanest, most psychotic, well-armed branch the Government has to beat you with. That’s right! we’ll send the man to your mail hole once a month for an entire year delivering the latest issue of CityBike. Just send a check for $30 to: PO Box 18738 Oakland, CA 94619. be sure to include your name, address, & phone number! or use Paypal! [email protected] Dirtbag the 13th By Sam Devine Photos by Bob Stokstad & Surj Gish A bout thirty motorcycles of mixed make are parked near the intersection of Highways 92 and 35. It’s a beautiful afternoon and Brian Wright’s left boot has a solid coating of oil. Standing next to the sweet orange-andblack flamed chopper he built from a $500 Yamaha Maxim, Wright doesn’t seem to mind. When offered some spare oil he says: “Nah, I got plenty. As long as it’s still leaking.” This sort of cavalier attitude is common amongst the competitors of the Dirtbag Challenge. For those of you that have missed it for the past 12 years, here are the rules of the Dirtbag: 1. Build a chopper for under $1000. 2. Do it in under a month. 3. Complete a hundred-mile group (or so) ride. The bikes this year are really something special. It’s always hard to say for sure, amongst all the chaos, but the level of craftsmanship, originality and skill seem higher than ever. There were also 22 on time, registered bikes back at the start. Before we pulled away, head Dirtbag, Poll Brown had some words for us: In years past, the event has slipped easily beneath the radar in the Wild, Wild West that is the Bayview-Hunters Point area of San Francisco. But the rising tide of gentrification is even starting to seep out to San Francisco’s most notoriously violent districts. As we tear throw the Bayview, folks on the sidewalk stop to watch us go by—and gathering attention in the Bayview is no small feat. It strikes me how odd this rolling monstrosity is. It’s like watching teeth float down the lane: strange, mangled, wrong, a fearsome thing. The Dirtbag has always been a free event, keeping the City coffers generally disinterested: As we go up and over Guadalupe Canyon, I look over to see a beautiful young woman on a sparkling CB175. She has a jean jacket, a Gringo helmet and a small vintage film camera hanging from her shoulder. “Perhaps she’s a member of the hipster press,” I think. “Toiling for SFist or The Bold Italic or whoever has usurped them this week in the game of hottest trending bullshit.” “We’ve lost money on it every year. Now we just lose a lot more,” says Turk, Poll’s partner in Dirtbaggery (it was $600 for the sound permit alone). “Last year they came “Now for only the second year ever we around and asked for permits. I told them pulled a permit because the Old Bill had been breathing down our Gregory Pecker.” we’ve been doing it eleven years and never (Brown is from South End, Essex.) “So they needed one. They said, ‘Well consider this have asked us to ask you not to do too many your invitation.’” burnouts. I asked, ok? But here’s a personal Along with the competitors, there are 20thing from me on the subject of burnouts. plus returning dirtbaggers, press and traffic Only once in my life ever have I done a interference bikes, which makes for a weird fucking burnout with my front wheel on parade. It’s a strange sight and a stranger the wall. Once. And that was just so I could sound. These bikes don’t just look like do a burnout with a mate that wanted to freaks from the freak factory, they sound do a burnout. That’s bollocks. If you put of a mangled menagerie: whistles and your fucking front wheel on a wall to do pops and bangs and roars and clangs and a burnout, you haven’t done your brakes ceaseless flatulation. right.” But then I remember the 49 Mile Ride that left simultaneously from the same place as the Dirtbag. Later on 280, I see an elder gent in a full track suit stranding a gorgeous Norton Commando 850. I give him a wave and a fuck yeah. This is absolutely the first one I’ve actually ridden next to. I sat on one in a back yard while growing up and seen them in museums—stared covetously at their twenty-thousand dollar price tags on craigslist. A beautiful British machine from 4. No Harleys. Photo: Surj Gish December 2015 | 17 | CityBike.com Stage Road did its best to rattle the bikes apart. redwoods towards the coast, we turn onto Stage Road, bumping down the narrow lane through the coastal hills. In Pescadero, we stop for gas and Jason Pate scrapes his bike hard against a fuel port in the parking lot. Hard enough to freak him right the fuck out. Three of us get down on our bellies to see if the engine pan is ready to piss oil or if it can hold it til the party. Luckily, the gorgeous ride, made from a Bandit 1200s and a 1970-something Amen Savior frame is ok. coils and a magneto. So the lights are hooked up to a strange-looking, flat battery mounted to the top of the tank. Herrera came down from Elk Grove. This is his second year. “I attempted last year and failed,” says Herrera. “I tried to ride all the way from Sacramento. That didn’t work out so well.” Even after getting to the start, the Dirtbag ride is no stroll through the park. And this year it’s especially grueling. After leaving Pescadero, we head up Highway One and take Tunitas Creek Road back to Skyline. We’ve been bumping and banging around for hours on what Dave Jenks (who’s riding his awesome CBR F4 hard tail from last years DBC) calls “little goat roads.” Tony Spinks leans his TT500-powered rigid contraption against a fence rather than fish his dinner-bell-shaped kickstand out of his bag. He’s a little amazed that Photo: Surj Gish his tail light is still on. Turns out a 500cc thumper mounted in a rigid frame without In all fairness, Poll Brown had warned us the days of Steve McQueen for certain. But got a little Ganesh statue welded to its front any rubber motor mounts will rattle your about the route at the rider’s meeting: a Dirtbag? Certainly not. fender. The headlight is framed by an artteeth a bit. deco style cowling, fanning out like a light “We’ve got a different route this year, it’s At Alice’s Restaurant, up on Skyline, Eric “It goes like stink. It wants to haul. I just fixture at a movie theater. The rear end a bit longer. There’s all kinds of pumpkin MacDougald pulls up next to me. There’s has been chopped down to bare bones and can’t stand the vibration.” bullshit going on down in Half Moon Bay. visible smoke coming from his engine. I given a long monoshock from an R100GS. Spinks’ bike will finish the ride and win We don’t want any part of that. So we’re question whether he has an oil or exhaust leak. “I just did what BMW eventually did,” says the award Brian Wright’s Maxim-based chop. Irish. His build came in around $800: $500 for Coolest. “Naw,” he says. “I took the radiator cap off. It will also for the bike; $150 for a new rear tire; $150 I’m gonna top it off with water.” for another parts bike. Everything else was flip out from underneath laying around his custom metal shop. “Just water?” I ask. “Not anti-freeze?” him while It’s easy to see how the Dirtbag concept “Nah. If it’s gonna be leaking all over, it doing a gives an inherent advantage to folks that might as well be water.” burnout work with their hands for a living. and land on Too true. Too true. top of Brian Take for instance the Dirtbagger built by Now, some of you may be thinking: “But Bill Dietrich, who runs Quality Motorcycle Wright’s putting tap water in a cooling system will Repair, a one-man shop in Mill Valley. The bike. Spinks corrode yada blah thermostat yada fittings 1982 KZ 750 he completed the challenge got the 1977 blah blah total system failure.” And so TT500cc with was last registered in Texas in 1991 forth. engine for and had been sitting in in his shop’s yard $200 from for twelve years. After spraying some This is where I must remind you that some kid that Marvel Mystery oil in the cylinders and MacDougald has spent approximately $350 had it in a gobuying a cheap fender from the internet, dollars on this bike. It is closer to a bottle he figures his entire build was around $40. kart. He built rocket than a daily commuter. As long as Photo: Surj Gish Everything else was either was either lying the frame it gets back to Hunters Point and does a around his shop or was traded for stuff that himself from burnout, it’s a winner. going to stay out of that… It’s going to be a about $200 worth of steel. The front end was lying around his shop. Right next to him is Grant Irish’s 1982 came from a ‘99 Bandit and the rear wheel little bit longer but hopefully it will be a bit After enough time to fuel up the bike and more fun because of that.” BMW R65 chop. It looks like a blast, from an SV650. wrapped in hand crafted aluminum, with a guzzle down a cup of coffee, the ride heads So after a bit more fun, Rich, President of down La Honda Road. It’s an awe-inspiring Sitting on the cinder blocks near the gas big dirt tire on the back—it’s my personal the Mad Dogs MC declares: “You guys on morning. Crisp, clear air. Cold in the shade pumps is Rob Herrera. His yellow 1986 choice for “Bike I Wanna Ride.” It’s even hard tails must have hemorrhoids the size Yamaha TY350 is rigged to run off three and warm in the sun. Sweeping out of the of golf balls by now!” We’ve made it back to where our story began: the intersection of 92 and 35. And yes, truly, after the 80 miles we’ve already done, the hard tailed guys have paid no small price, displayed no small bit of endurance. Tony Spinks is cursing the fact that all that stands between his posterior and his high-vibration custom is four layers of yoga mat. Yup. His seat is made of four layers of yoga mat. Repair & Service We Ship Worldwide CALL US FIRST! Salvaged & New Parts! Tue–Fri 10–6 Sat 9–5 December 2015 | 18 | CityBike.com “So do you do yoga?” I ask skeptically, looking at the large, tall Harley-Davidson employee. “No,” says Spinks, laughing. “I walked into Big 5 and saw it right away and grabbed it. The counter girl was looking at me like ‘What?’” We’re almost done with a 120 mile ride, with only a quick rip up 280 left to return us to Hunters Point and the grease and glory that awaits. We’re just waiting momentarily for Poll Brown to catch up after getting a flat tire. Once back at the event, people tell me the event is tamer than years past and I suppose it’s true. A few bicycle cops are passing back and forth. That, along with warnings from Turk and Poll, seems to be enough to discourage the non-stop lawless barrage of wheelies, burnouts, and drunken public nakedness that the event has been in years past. Perhaps it’s a mellower, more mature Dirtbag. After all, at 13, the event is old enough to do its own laundry, pack its own lunch and walk to school by itself. Winning Dirtbags Photos: Bob Stokstad “That’s San Francisco,” says Lucky 13 manager Martin Kraenkel while showing off his ‘67 Harley in the parking lot. “Anywhere there’s fun they stop it. Look at Halloween in the Castro.” But it’s still a blast. Guido still flies the chair on his sidecar. The music is still excessively loud and there are still plenty of burnouts. Liza Miller of Re-Cycle Garage and the “Motorcycles and Misfits” crew came up from Santa Cruz and had a tailgate party. They also recorded a podcast that can be found at MotorcyclesAndMisfits. com. And I finally get a good look at Alan Lapp’s amazing DR 650. The frame is a custom ring of two-inch pipe that doubles as the gas tank. Near the bottom of it, a jet ski fuel pump sends gas up to another piece of pipe on top of the handlebars. This little reservoir has a drain that goes to the carb and an overflow hose that returns to the frame/tank. It’s an ingenious, enclosed gasoline fountain that allows the carb to sip fuel via gravity the way nature intended. Photo: Surj Gish And then Justin Martens sweeps almost every category. Martens’ deathmobile mutant kronenburg KTM 500 took People’s Choice, The Jake, The Sketchiest, and the Gulu. And then he runs his mouth just a little bit too long. I remember winning a single award in 2012, also for the Gulu: the hairiest, most-likely-to-kill-you bike amongst the pack. I remember the euphoria, the sheer sense of invincibility, the rush of being cheered for by a pack of his words and rightly so. When your flying so high that you’ve gotta look down to see the sky, there’s no point in taking a dump on the moon—it’s dealt with enough interstellar bullshit already. And then things get violent. Trophies are smashed. No humans are harmed, but some trophies prove more resilient than others. I’m just sick enough in the head that my eyes grow wide as the first trophy hits Rides for the kids, and adults too! Lapp’s bike also features Hossack front suspension. It’s worth looking up online, but in the meantime, imagine a front end that floats out in front of the bike and seems to defy the laws of physics and any other rules that might keep the front wheel from going for a stroll all by its lonesome. He wins Craftiest Contraption and deserves it. Photo: Bob Stokstad “If you haven’t seen this dude’s fucking bike, you’ve gotta check it out,” say Poll while giving the award. “Cause I’ve been riding longer than some of you cunts have been in long trousers and I ain’t never seen nothing like it!” people you respected and feared. It was like the ground—a trophy I’m fairly certain floating through an art gallery with a flame wasn’t Martens’s in fact but the “Coolest” thrower and a morphine drip. I could do no award that was handed to Tony Spinks. wrong. “For me, it’s about the ride,” says Brian But Martens wins multiple awards. Wright later, after winning the Founder’s Choice award. “When you’re looking back And while most other recipients had said, on your life, you’re not going to look back “Thanks to my and say ‘When I was 37 I won that trophy wife for putting for building that bike.’ Naw, you can have Photo: Bob Stokstad up with my shit,” the trophy.” somewhere amidst the It would seem there are two lessons here: 1) euphoria and When you win big, don’t talk shit. 2) Don’t supermanism, pay too much attention to the awards and Martens decides what’s said about them. Most likely the to keep talking recipients are barely self-aware. and happens to “I don’t even know what I said,” Martens look at a trike – explains as he packs up later. one damn fine trike – and says But then that’s motorcycling. Sometimes what honestly we lose focus for a moment and wind up came to his asking, “What happened?” As long as Brent Mason and Gail Smith of California Sport Touring alcohol-andeveryone can walk away from it, we’ll get decided to revive Ed Cavanaugh’s Yamaha DT250 dirtbagger success-soaked to do it all again. And despite all my note and ride it in his memory for this year’s ‘Bag—a fitting tribute, in mind. Positive, taking, the Dirtbag leaves me dizzy each conjunction with Ed’s memorial at Ocean Beach the day before encouraging, year. There was so much going on that I the Dirtbag. it is not. And Sam is a former Dirtbagger, moto-instructor completely forgot to mention the Ducati the people that Gail, mechanic at CA ST, and one of Ed’s good friends, rode and CityBike’s newest columnist. Turn to the rider that went down in front of me on made the trike the DT-bagger. It chucked its chain on the way to Alice’s, but a next page to read the latest. Tunitas Creek Road… take issue with replacement was installed, and Gail finished the ride on the bike. December 2015 | 19 | CityBike.com Chain. Sprockets. Lights. Why, one time he brought that thing by and there wasn’t a drop of oil left in it. I mean the drain plug was dry. I asked him when the last time he checked the oil was and he said he couldn’t remember. So I told him he was out of oil. And he said, ‘I guess I hadn’t noticed.’” sam DEVINE Illustration by Sam Devine T “Shoulda seized up! Another time he left that bike with me overnight and I got to it the next day. But there wasn’t a drip o’ fuel in it. So I was worried that he’d got some gas leak and I checked the yard and the shop and drained the oil to see if it was full of petrol.” of it. Danged thing certainly wasn’t gonna turn any better… Did the Kid expect it to go faster? If that was what he was after, he should really be thinking about a big bore kit. he Kid had brought his Sportster around the Shop a couple times. It was a fun enough bike, the Wrench figured, having putted around the yard on it a few times. The Kid was doing the usual customization to it: swapping out the handlebars; putting the license plate and brake light down by the chain; trading the standard gas tank for a peanut. And he’d changed the stock seat to a little springer, even though the bike was already a soft tail. “It’ll look cool,” the Kid explained. The Wrench figured he couldn’t knock him too hard for it, though, even if it was adding Well, shit. Shoulda up to pretty much the same custom bike as seen that coming. He thought for a lot of others. Well, shoot, who out there a moment and, ever said, “Yep, I got a bone-stock Harley finding nothing and that’s the way I like it.” to combat this sentiment, suddenly felt But now the Kid wanted to do something trapped on a project bike. Again. There was weird and the Wrench didn’t know how no way out. Dammit. It would look cool. to feel about it. The Kid was talking about “Ok, sure,” he heard himself saying. “But jamming an extended swingarm from a you wanna attach it how?” drag-racing GSX-R onto the poor little Sporty. For the life of him, the Wrench It was a six-of-one, half-dozen-of-thecouldn’t figger what there was to get out other sort of deal. The chain was getting longer either way, so at least that was straightforward. They could cut the new swing arm here and there, weld the frame accordingly, or mount on the stock bushings in the new swing arm and leave the frame alone. The Kid nattered on for a while and then finished up by saying: “I mean; it should work in theory.” The Wrench snorted. “In theory,” he said. “In theory.” He reached into his stained grey coveralls (or were they faded blue?) and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. The Kid never could figure out where the Wrench got those things. They had no brand name—just read “Cigarettes” in black on a white cardboard box. Maybe the Wrench had a palette of military-issue smokes hidden downstairs somewhere. He had been in the Corps. But was it Korea or Vietnam? The Kid would work up the nerve to ask some day. Black Friday specials all weekend! 3 days only! november 27 @11am – 7pm november 28 @10am – 6pm november 29 @12pm – 5pm “Should work in theory,” the Wrench said again, taking a drag. “Heh. Stranger things Horatio... Heh, heh, heh. Should work in theory. D’you ever meet old Keith Oarman? No, well, I s’pose that’s before your time, really. How ‘bout the Delta? You ever spend much time out thataways?” “Sure,” said the Kid. “Out by the docks and the Rod and Gun Club. My brother and me had an inflatable canoe we used to paddle around and hunt crawdads. Used to just whack ‘em out onto the sand with sticks. Called it ‘Mud Bug Golfin’.” D-STORE SAN FRANCISCO 131 South Van Ness Avenue San Francisco, CA 94103 T. 415.626.5478 | [email protected] DaineseDStoreSanFrancisco “Shouldn’t the engine have…” “Ha, whatever works, right? So, Oarman lived out there in them moss-covered trees. We were in the Corps together back when we was in… well, anyway, he used ta work the boats out in the delta, fishing, fixing, rigging, whatever. And he had an old panhead that he’d drag around. “He dint used to do a damn thing to that bike. He’d come in for a tire change and I’d look the bike over and tell him what he really needed was about seven other things. December 2015 | 20 | CityBike.com He paused, dragging from his nameless cigarette. “Well, there was at least oil in it this time but there weren’t no gas. So I called him up and told him so. And he said it made sense—in theory—since the last place he’d fueled up was about 400 miles away.” “Four hundred miles?! How big was his tank?” “That’s the thing! I told him over the phone: ‘Keith, you only got a five gallon tank. You shoulda run outta gas over a hundred miles back!’ You know what he said? ‘Oh, I guess I hadn’t noticed.’” “Hadn’t noticed?! But…” “Yeah, so Oarman passed a few years after that. An’ his wife called me up and said she was pretty sure some teenagers were messing with his old Shovelhead ‘cause she’d been wakin’ up to the sound of its engine coming and going. So I went over there and prepped it for storage like it shoulda been from the git go when she decided not to sell sell it or bury ‘im with it. Drained the gas and oil and locked the rear tire to a tree with a length a chain. “There,” I said. ‘That should work in theory. ‘Sheeee-it. I don’t think I’ve said that since. “Wait…But...Why not?” “Why not?! I’ll tell you why not: I was down by the docks a few days later, pickin’ up some oysters from the Shucker. It was dusk and we saw someone out on the levee road, riding an old Shovelhead. The Shucker says: ‘Say, don’t that look like old Oarman? ...but… but he’s dead.’ And…” “Maybe he just didn’t notice,” said the Kid. “Oh, you’re funny. Why don’t you go read that postcard on the fridge over there. I’monna push your bike up on the lift.” Sam is CityBike’s newest columnist. He lives in SF, teaches motorcycling and kitesurfing and is currently competing with Editor Surj for the “gnarliest facial hair at CityBike” trophy. my best British accent, “Caveat emptor when smelling bollocks. Nothing in their marketing Chief, World material said they piloted their Adventure BMW motorcycles, or even a Affairs Desk single motorcycle, on all seven of the continents, which includes Antarctica. The reader is the fool to not question whether it was having motorcycled on all of the seven recognized ullshit. This verbal corruption of continents, or that the truth abounds in the adventure couple had been on five motorcycling world like greenish fungus growing between the booted toes of of the seven once, and motorcyclists exploring equatorial regions the sixth one twice, thereby arriving at on the cheap. The foot scourge thrives their self-produced on dirty feet and sweaty socks seldom washed. Written or verbal fungal adventure ad material of ‘7 continents.’ As for motorcycle rot also thrive, thanks to the this kind of bollocks Internet. being a violation, Definitions of bullshit include the words it may possibly exaggeration, lies, deceptive, boastful be a violation of language, crap and rubbish. I live in a trusting public Montana, where we politely refer to BS as and camaraderie the excrement of a male bovine. However, of the adventure when one of a group of motorcyclists motorcycling recently claimed they had crossed into community, but China from Muse (in Myanmar), with a globally it is not a text saying “got in, no problems at all,” my violation of any Montana nose sniffed fresh male bovine established rules, excrement. merely a question of ethics and integrity.” While this claim was not an outright lie, it was boastful language that excluded a key element in the world of adventure motorcyclists pushing the envelope of recently-opened motorcycle travel possibilities in and out of Myanmar. The group’s boasting left out the ingredient Illustration by Mr. Jensen they needed to make this claim: money. A query to the event promoter questioning They paid big money to a local guide the origin and veracity of the claims was who schmoozed the crossing with the required MMT Permit from the Myanmar replied to most professionally with, “All our guests get to present themselves as government, allowing them to appear to have big face by doing something at which they desire.” So the source of the bollocks was the British BMW riders themselves, others had failed or could not sort out by not some slick marketing firm or event themselves. The hole in their excrement led readers to believe the group had merely promoter. As the KTM adventurer noted, “you can sell yourself anyway you want.” rocked up to the border, unescorted, and had no problem doing what informed, The KTM fellow bounced back after hardened travelers knew could not be done. receiving the response with a link to dr. gregory w. FRAZIER B British BS was recently flowing from a couple who were selling an evening dinner with them for $20 per ticket, their Internet advertisement reading that they were “two of the world’s best adventure riders,” having traveled “122 countries, 7 continents”over “12 years of global travel.” One KTM-riding recipient of the couple’s Internet marketing invitation wrote, “World’s best? I never even heard of these people! It’s all about marketing yourself, I guess. Even if it’s all bullshit, I suppose you can sell yourself any way you want. But it does somehow seem to be a violation, doesn’t it?” Bowing to the couple being from Great Britain where bollocks is the accepted English slang for bullshit, I replied with another Brit and his video promo for a television show of him circumnavigating Africa. In the video clip the viewer was treated to the claims of his having done this all “on his own, unsupported, 34 countries 55,000 kilometers,” which included a few seconds of narration about the Yamaha rider dodging bullets. On the screen appeared three bullet holes in a plate glass, looking like a car windscreen, accompanied on the audio track with the sound of gunfire: “bang bang.” Writing back, I said “Cracking good audio-visual bollocks! When I saw the bullet holes appear and heard the gunfire, the vodka martini I was stirring started to be James Bond-shaken. It’s all been done before, this riding motorcycles in “migan on it.” It is just Internet motorcycle adventure bull flop. the link.” and around Africa, sleeping in bug infested rooms, gunfire and bad roads. I will skip the TV show, but in the future when you are surfing the Internet motorcycle adventure video clips and find some motorcycle adventurist who did Africa naked, or at least wearing a speedo, with motorcycle gloves, boots and a helmet, send me Shaking the next martini, I pondered, “How does one interpret or move into a suspension of belief mode with this Internet adventure motorcycle excrement of the male bovine kind?” Hygienically! Some deep operative jungle foot training bubbled up through my martini-clouded gray matter. The covert jungle fighters were taught to attend to their feet or bad flop could eat into a leg or kidney, a nasty fungal grunge named Cellulitis. The simple prevention was dry feet and cleanliness. If not possible, then foot powder with clean socks. If the powder was not available, then the trainees were told to go to the old Indian treatment: urinate on their feet. Extrapolating to motorcycle adventure bull flop from foot rot first meant first another shaken drink to help thinking way outside my head when reading or seeing these advertisements, promotions or hearing them at some travelers meeting around a campfire. The answer was to simply do what the jungle warriors did to bad feet, say to one’s self, “micturate on it” or in Old English, so the Brits could understand, December 2015 | 21 | CityBike.com Dr. Frazier’s new all-color coffee table book, DOWN AND OUT IN PATAGONIA, KAMCHATKA AND TIMBUKTU, available at mototorbooks.com, is the first-ever first-hand chronicle of a never-ending motorcycle ride by “the world’s most cerebral motorcyclist.” It is highly “recommended” by Grant Johnson, horizonsunlimited.com adventure travel book guru, and for dream riding armchair and keyboard adventurists. junk. Junk. And mixed in there, SOME kind-of interesting stuff. maynard The uncle had a couple old Indian motorcycles and a good-looking Royal Enfield that might have been imported as an Indian, back, I guess, in the late 50’s. He had a Matchless single that was all there, as they say, and some kind of old Norton twin, maybe a 600. HERSHON This piece ran in CityBike back in the mideighties, twenty years after the action in the first part of the story. I n the spring of ‘63, I rode my Velocette from Tucson to Los Angeles, packing my buddy Al. Al’s mission: purchase a Velo for himself at dealer price, direct from the U.S. distributor, Lou Branch. Al’s uncle, who had some kind of business license, was to broker the slightly shady deal. For his nephew. For $50. The bikes sat outside in the weather; none looked even close to new. Still, they were charming old machines and lots of guys must’ve wanted them. stuff floor to ceiling, too, except for the tunnel-like passage left in the stuff so the uncle could get to his bed. If he walked sideways and stooped over. No noisy plumbing disturbed the peace of the stuff and the uncle in the trailer. Restroom facilities at nearby businesses sufficed; too much luxury dulls a man’s edge, after all. The uncle, a somewhat idiosyncratic individual, ignored polite society’s priorities. He danced, you’ll agree, to his own tune. Al’s uncle appeared to be a dealer in motorcycles and parts. His appearance He had gearboxes. Remember, in those rough old days, engines were engines and gearboxes bolted on behind. He had Burman and A.M.C. and Norton and Triumph and B.S.A. gearboxes. He had sprockets. He had points and The lot fronted on a run-down commercial street. Two house trailers, unmoved for years, sat on blocks, all but invisible in the weeds. Surrounding the trailers, corner to corner and edge to edge in the lot, lay motorcycles and parts. Rusty old motorcycles, dusty newer motorcycles, and mounds, piles and heaps of boxed and unboxed parts. Uncountable, indescribable amounts and varieties of what most right-thinking Americans call condensers (hundreds). He had coils. He had Lucas parts boxes in knee-deep piles on the ground. He had fenders and headlight shells, and the nacelles British bikes used to have shrouding their headlights. Switches, chrome rims (both headlight and wheel), brake shoes and Smiths instruments. You get the idea. None of this stuff was, well, arranged. It likely rested where it landed the first time he set it down to grab more stuff. Unless someone kicked it by accident, it stayed right there. Everywhere. Stuff wall-towall. A guy wanted to graze through it, sift through it, like you’d do if you dropped your ring at the beach. The one trailer admitted no one. That old mobile home stored stuff, let me tell you, from its invisible (but sagging, I’ll bet) floor to its bulging ceiling. You dared not open the door. You might have nerve enough to jump a motorcycle over 17 Cadillacs, but no way would you turn that handle and brave the torrential consequences. Hey, but the other trailer. Al’s uncle lived in that one. You’d figure it’d be only messy, maybe, with stuff. Wrong. That trailer had The uncle’s income, had there been any, would’ve come from the sale of bikes or parts for a profit. Because he never sold any of his motorcycles or parts he had no profits, so his lifestyle had to be simple and lean. So he saved on water and utilities by getting by without them. I believe, further, that he saw no benefit in bathing. There were no showers in the public restrooms nearby, anyway. Illustration by Mr. Jensen Al did, in fact, succeed in buying that Velocette, a Venom Clubman. Hard as it is to believe, back when many of today’s collector bikes were readily available on showroom floors, they sold slowly—or not at all. If Branch had had dealers screaming for 500cc Velos, he wouldn’t have sold that one to Al. So everybody was happy. Al and I rode our matching singles over to his uncle’s place. Al had described it as a used motorcycle store and wrecking yard. Nothing in my experience had prepared me for Al’s uncle or his so-called business. patience. He’d collect, little by little, all the motorcycle stuff he could. Sooner or later some guy would come by and want to buy some item, some component of that stuff, and he could laugh and refuse to sell it. Satisfying, huh? deceived. While Al and I visited, a would-be customer arrived at the lot and took a long look at the Royal Enfield twin, or as much of it as he could see sticking up out of the weeds. He smiled at Al’s uncle and us and introduced himself. He wanted, he said, to buy that old Enfield. The uncle smiled. He shook his head. You don’t have enough money, he told the fellow, to buy that bike. The guy said he didn’t want any gifts, that he could afford it and he’d been thinking about it for some time. He said he was an Enfield kinda guy. He wanted to pay a fair price and own this one. I don’t think you understand, the uncle said; you can’t afford that motorcycle. By then the customer could see what was going on. He said again, though, that he was willing to pay whatever was fair. I remember he mentioned a figure that sounded fair, even generous. Al’s uncle laughed. You obviously don’t have any idea, he told the guy, what you’re looking at here. Don’t waste my time. The guy left. I looked at the uncle and knew in an instant that he never ever sold anything at all. He kept things, things you wanted, things he had. He possessed, I believe (after reflecting on that visit all these years) infinite December 2015 | 22 | CityBike.com So, Al’s uncle needed industrial strength deodorant, which he naturally (heh) didn’t bother to use. You didn’t have to look up from your reading to know it was him who walked into the room. You could just tell—even if it was a big room. He wore the same clothes for weeks, evidently, and bathed occasionally if at all, but he talked like a high-roller. He had this pose, that he was a successful businessman, that he made deals and sold high-ticket stuff, that he was somebody there in SoCal. You sat there and looked him in the eyes while he went on about all this fasttracking and you tried super hard not to smell him. He took me to coffee next door to his lot at a little greasy spoon cafe. I bought; he’d left his Diner’s card in his other suit. While we sat at the counter there, people sliding by to get to their seats did big takes as they passed. I listened to him, fascinated but embarrassed and uncomfortable. When he flirted with the waitress, I winced. When he hit on her, inviting her to his trailer after closing, I drew the line. I gotta leave, I said. Al and I got on those two wonderful black thirty-inchers and thumped away to San Francisco. A decade later I met a fellow who used to ride to Alice’s Restaurant on weekends. He had a remarkable habit. Each time Honda released a new model, he’d buy two. The first two. All the other guys would stand around and admire his new motorcycle, whatever it was. And only he had one like it. Why, in fact, he had two, one of them still in the crate, unridden. When whatever model it may have been became easily available, he’d sell both of the ones he owned. Struck a chord in my memory. This was Al’s uncle, scrubbed up. He had it, whatever it was; guys wanted it but couldn’t have it. That made it cool. Maybe just having that circle of manly men standing around you made it cool. Made him feel accepted, or respected… something. Probably something. ed HERTFELDER H ave you ever tried to teach your girl to ride a dirtbike and never seen her again? Have you ever tried to run a long-reach spark plug in a short-reach cylinder head by only screwing it in part way? Been so tired you couldn’t reset your speedometer? Have you ever been bulldogging down a steep slope and had a bee walk across your eyelid? Hitched up a loaded three-bike trailer by yourself, then spent five minutes getting yourself straightened up again? Have you ever checked your jacket pockets and found five open-end wrenches of the same exact size? Have you ever felt sore and stiff on a Monday and worse on Tuesday? Stared at a pile of returned gas cans for ten minutes before finding yours right out in front? Have you ever found out who the jerk was that thumped the side of your van at three in the morning? Have you ever found out exactly how far your motorcycle would go on reserve? Bent Have you ever removed a rear wheel while you kept the motorcycle balanced on a milk crate with your nose? Tried to kickstart a 600cc motorcycle with bare feet? Have you ever collided with one of 350 competitors in an enduro, who turned out to be a fellow club member? Have you ever tried to drive a van full of motorcycles up a wet grass slope? Ever found your can of chain lube exactly where you left it? Have you ever used an insect repellent that was worse than the insects? Have you ever waved to a friend with your left hand and pulled your throttle grip off with your right? Ever found a beautiful pair of goggles on the trail and then lost them? n nse tr Illus Have you ever lost the jaw from an adjustable wrench? Bent an ignition key with your knee? Have you ever searched five minutes for a valve stem before finding it clenched between your teeth? Lost a kick start lever and started your bike with a Vice-Grip on the splines? Have you ever tried to write the brand of your bike in yellow snow? Have you ever replaced a wheel then found another spacer on the ground? Tightened a spoke at a gas stop and broken the end off? Have you ever loaned out your bike trailer then had to track it down through four different guys? Have you ever a met a deer coming the other way on a narrow trail? Have you ever crested a steep ridge and hung there with both wheels off the ground? Thought your clutch cable had broken until you found the adjuster nut three feet down the cable? Have you ever ridden thru so much water that your engine oil looked like battleship paint? Have you ever bugged a female rider for her phone number and gotten a Dial-A-Prayer message? Ever used a car ski rack to carry your crutches? Banged your nose so hard you couldn’t enjoy picking it for two weeks? Have you ever spent $600 making an $800 motorcycle perform like a $1,200 motorcycle? Have you ever bought something you really needed at a swap meet? Put a six-volt bulb in a twelve-volt system? Have you ever watched your broken hand melt out of sight, into a big block of ice? Ever forgotten your AMA card and had to buy a new one, three weeks in a row? Lifted your motorcycle onto a milk crate, then needed something in the crate? Have you ridden with a bandana tied around your forehead to soak up sweat and had it drop down over your eyes, just when you needed them most? Have you ever dragged your brakes for two miles after a water cross and just as they stated grabbing again, dropped into another creek? Tried to make up time on a gravel road only to overshoot a turn by 445 yards? e r. J yM b n atio Ever ridden two and a half miles getting to the other side of ten-yard mud hole? Tried to push-start a motorcycle on a two-footwide ledge? Have you ever tried to change a spark plug quickly and put the old one back a loading ramp? Tried to find a rusty cotter pin in last year’s pine needles? in again? Have you ever entered an enduro using the last money you had, then drained fuel from the bike to get the van home again? Had to give back a trophy after they discovered a scoring error? Have you ever sold a motorcycle on the half down and half never plan? up table, ready to go, and gotten a number that leaves in 93 minutes? Have you arrived later than usual and gotten a number that starts in four minutes? Have you ever ridden to the sign December 2015 | 23 | CityBike.com Have you ever had an exhausted rider total your best—only—folding chair? Have you ever caught a branch with your throat and thought you had a do-ityourself tracheotomy? Swung a tall trophy into the rear seat of a car and broken the windshield with the head of the little gold rider? Leaned your motorcycle against an old truck just before it moved away? Have you ever reridden an entire 90 mile event in your sleep? Have you ever crashed because of a Playboy centerfold stapled to a tree? Had a loose watchband grind a hole in your wrist? Taken your boot off and been afraid to look at your foot? Needed help to get your wallet out of your back pocket? Ever quit riding forever, two weeks in a row? Have you ever wondered if all the haveyou-evers really happened? Get Ed’s latest book, 80.4 Finish Check on Amazon.com! CityBike Classifieds CLASSIFIEDS TOWING Enter these contacts into your phone now, while you are thinking about it, so that you will have them when you need them. Cycle Tow 510-644-2453(BIKE) Est 1988 24hr emergency service. Reasonable rates. We tow all makes of motorcycles, sidecars and trikes. We also network with many other motorcycle tow services throughout the entire Bay Area. If we can’t get to you quickly, we can find you a tow service that’s closer. We are based in Berkeley, CA. SAN FRANCISCO AND BEYOND: DAVE’S CYCLE TRANSPORT The Old Man The Old Truck Dave is working Dave’s Cycle Transport San Francisco-Bay Area and Beyond… 24 Hour Service (415)824-3020 — www.davescycle.com Motorcycle & ATV Hauling Sonoma, Marin, Napa & Mendocino Counties 24 hour Roadside Pickup 707-843-6584 Insured & Licensed California Motor Carrier Permit www.mcmotorcycletransport.com [email protected] DEALER CLASSIFIED Dubbelju Motorcycle Rentals / Storage First, a few words about the condition of our equipment. All advertised vehicles are technically and operationally sound and factory original (very important for vehicle inspection and licensing out-of-country). Components which show even a trace of wear or fatigue are replaced. In other words, you receive a motorcycle which, while it may have some miles on the odometer, has been routinely and expertly maintained. 2013 BMW F800GS 34k miles (Kalamata metallic) Fully loaded: ABS, ESA, ASC, heated grips, computer, and adjustable shock. It has 34K miles, factory warranty is valid until 3/2016 or 36K miles. The major 36K service was recently completed by BMW San Francisco. CA tags till MAR 2016. We were asking $9,950 but have reduced the price to only $7,800.00 or best offer! 2012 BMW R1200GS 45k miles (Titan Silver) 110hp, 1170cc, 6 Speed, shaft drive, braided steel brake and clutch hoses, computer, heated grips, BMW Vario panniers, centerstand, LED rear light, luggage rack, adjustable levers, hand protectors, adjustable windshield, adjustable seat, cast aluminum wheels, recently serviced, CA tags till Jun 2016. Only asking $9,500 or best offer! 2014 BMW R1200GS 33k miles (Red) 125hp, liquid cooled Boxer, electronic intake pipe injection/BMS-K digital engine management with electromotive throttle actuator, Dynamic ESA, digital engine management with twin-spark ignition, shaft drive, braided steel brake and clutch hoses, computer, ABS partly integrated (switchable), electronic immobilizer, heated grips, BMW Vario panniers, centerstand, LED rear light, luggage rack, adjustable levers, hand protectors, adjustable windshield, adjustable seat, aluminum wheels, recently serviced, CA tags till Apr 2016. Only asking $14,950 or best offer! FREE HELP WANTED ADS In our ongoing effort to support and promote local motorcycling businesses that we rely on, all motorcycle industry help wanted ads will be listed in the CityBike Classifieds Section for free. Contact us via email: rftc.citybike.com J&M Motorsports LLC 2243 Old Middlefield Way Mountain View, Ca 94043 650-386-1440 www.jm-ms.com We have a huge selection of Sport bikes, Cruisers, Dual Sport & Dirt Bikes! We are a licensed dealer owned and operated by people who love motorcycles. We specialize in newer, low-mile, affordable bikes! We offer in-house financing! Visit our website and fill out an application today! Looking for your first bike, your tenth? J&M is not a giant dealership. When you call or visit, you’re talking directly with non-commission team members who are passionate about motorcycles and who want to help you get the bike you desire! Looking to sell your bike? Consignments are welcome! Come by and take a look! BMW 2010 BMW S1000RR - $10,995 Can-Am: 2014 Can-Am Spyder RT Limited - $22,995 Harley-Davidson 2011 Harley-Davidson FLHX Street Glide - $15,995 2014 Harley-Davidson FLHX Street Glide - $18,995 2014 Harley-Davidson FLSTFB Fat Boy Lo - $14,495 2012 Harley Davidson FLTRU Road Glide Ultra - $18,995 2009 Harley-Davidson FXDB Dyna Street Bob - $10,995 2014 Harley-Davidson FXDB Dyna Street Bob - $15,495 2015 Harley-Davidson FXDB Dyna Street Bob - $14,495 2011 Harley-Davidson FXDWG Dyna Wide Glide - $10,995 1999 Harley-Davidson FXST Softail - $6,995 2014 Harley Davidson XL883N Sportster 883 Iron - $8,995 2012 Harley Davidson XL1200X Sportster Forty-Eight - $9,495 2003 Harley-Davidson V-Rod Anniversary - $8,995 2014 Harley-Davidson V-Rod Night Rod Special - $14,995 Honda 2012 Honda CBR250R - $3,795 2006 Honda CBR600RR - $5,995 2006 Honda CBR600RR - $6,495 2007 Honda CBR1000RR - $6,995 2008 Honda CBR1000RR - $7,995 2004 Honda RVT Racing RC51 - $6,995 2008 Honda Shadow 750 Aero - $4,795 2002 Honda CR125R - $2,495 2012 Honda CRF450R - $5,495 Kawasaki 2013 Kawasaki KX450F - $5,795 2015 Kawasaki KX450F - $6,695 2007 Kawasaki Ninja 500R - $3,995 2006 Kawasaki Ninja 650R - $3,795 2008 Kawasaki Ninja ZX-6R - $6,995 2009 Kawasaki Ninja ZX-6R - $7,495 2009 Kawasaki Ninja ZX-6R Monster Edition - $7,995 2012 Kawasaki Ninja ZX-6R - $8,995 2005 Kawasaki Ninja ZX-10R - $6,495 2007 Kawasaki Ninja ZX-10R - $6,495 2007 Kawasaki Ninja ZX-10R - $6,995 2011 Kawasaki Ninja ZX-14R - $8,995 2012 Kawasaki Z1000 - $7,495 2009 Kawasaki Teryx Side-by-Side - $8,495 KTM 2003 KTM 450 SX - $3,995 2013 KTM 150 XC - $4,995 Suzuki 2013 Suzuki GW250 - $3,795 2008 Suzuki GSX-R600 - $7,495 2009 Suzuki GSX-R600 - $7,995 2014 Suzuki GSX-R600 - $9,995 2012 Suzuki GSX-R600 - $9,495 2013 Suzuki GSX-R600 - $9,995 2011 Suzuki GSX-R750 - $8,495 2008 Suzuki GSX-R1000 - $8,995 2008 Suzuki GZ250 - $2,995 2014 Suzuki RM-Z450 - $4,995 2012 Suzuki V-Strom DL1000 - $7,695 2011 Suzuki Boulevard C50T - $3,995 Triumph 2014 Triumph Street Triple R ABS - $9,495 2014 Triumph Street Triple R ABS Team Empire Special Edition - $9,495 2014 Triumph Street Triple R ABS Team Empire Special Edition - $9,495 2013 Triumph Daytona 675 ABS - $9,995 2014 Triumph Daytona 675 ABS - $10,495 2015 Triumph Daytona 675 ABS - $11,495 2012 Triumph Tiger Explorer - $11,995 2014 Triumph Rocket III Roadster - $10,995 Yamaha 2015 Yamaha YZ250F - $2,595 2014 Yamaha TT-R125 LE - $2,995 2008 Yamaha YZF R6S - $6,495 2006 Yamaha YZF R6 - $6,995 2011 Yamaha YZF R6 - $8,495 2014 Yamaha YZF R6 - $9,495 2009 Yamaha FZ6R - $4,995 2012 Yamaha FZ6R - $5,995 2012 Yamaha FZ8 - $7,495 2002 Yamaha V-Star 1100 - $3,995 Reach thousands of Northern California motorcyclists. Just $15 for 25 words, 25¢ each additional word. Photos add $25. Industry classifieds are a higher price. Free 25-word listing for stolen bikes. Deadline is the 3rd of each month. Just fill out the form, or copy and send it with your check, payable to CityBike PO Box 18738, Oakland, CA 94619. Name: Address: City: e-mail: 2010 Yamaha Road Star Silverado S - $8,495 SF MOTO 275 8th Street at the corner of Folsom San Francisco - 415-255-3132 www.sfmoto.com USED INVENTORY - All used motorcycles at SF Moto come with a 3 month warranty and 12 month roadside assistance (including towing). We thoroughly inspect our previously owned inventory: - If brakes are worn over 60%, new pads are installed. - If tires are worn beyond 60%, new tires are installed. - If chain & sprockets have too much play, we install new chain & sprockets. BMW F800R ABS, 2012, Red-silver, 8890 Miles, $7998 S1000 RR, 2013, White, 3417 Miles, $13498 G650 GS, 2011, Red, 495 Miles, $6998 S1000 RR, 2014, White, 1521 Miles, $13998 Ducati Evo 848, 2012, White, 12102 Miles, $9498 Hypermotard 1100 EVO, 2012, Red, 5780 Miles, $10998 Hypermotard 796, 2010, White, 3988 Miles, $7998 Monster 1100 Evo, 2013, Red, 1622 Miles, $10498 Monster 1100 Evo, 2013, Black, 3137 Miles, $10998 Monster 1200 S, 2014, White, 751 Miles, $13998 Monster 696, 2009, Red, 6331 Miles, $6998 Monster 696 ABS, 2014, Black, 514 Miles, $8998 Monster 696 ABS, 2013, Black, 2069 Miles, $8498 Monster 696 ABS, 2013, Black, 2480 Miles, $8498 Multistrada 1200/S ABS, 2013, 21553 Miles, $14598 Panigale 899, 2014, Red, 2200 Miles, $13998 Streetfighter 1099, 2011, White, 6790 Miles, $11498 Honda CBR250 ABS, 2011, Red, 3369 Miles, $3798 CBR250R, 2012, Red/white/blue, 3009 Miles, $3795 CBR250R, 2012, Black, 3512 Miles, $3498 CBR250R, 2012, Red, 274 Miles, $3998 CBR250R, 2012, White, Red, Blue, 274 Miles, $3998 CBR300R, 2015, White, 2400 Miles, $3998 CBR500R, 2013, Black, 1135 Miles, $5298 CBR500R, 2013, Red, 1 Miles, $5998 CBR 600RR, 2012, Black, 4018 Miles, $9998 CBR 600RR, 2012, Black, 3425 Miles, $8998 CRF 230M, 2009, Black, 3288 Miles, $4998 Rebel 250, 2012, Gray, 118 Miles, $3498 Rebel 250, 2013, Red, 6814 Miles, $3298 Kawasaki KLX250, 2009, Red, 116 Miles, $4498 KLX250, 2010, Black, 170 Miles, $4798 EX250, 2010, Green, 7504 Miles, $3498 EX250, 2010, Red, 13159 Miles, $3798 EX300, 2014, Black, 54 Miles, $5298 EX300, 2013, Black, 6528 Miles, $4998 EX650, 2013, White, 1040 Miles, $6498 ZR1000 ABS, 2015, Green, 9989 Miles, $9998 ZX636-F, 2013, White, 167 Miles, $9998 Piaggio Fly 150 Scooter, 2006, Red, 787 Miles, $2498 Suzuki Boulevard S40, 2012, Orange, 3084 Miles, $4498 GSX-R600, 2013, Blue, 948 Miles, $9498 GSX-R600, 2013, Blue, 3190 Miles, $9998 GSX-R750, 2014, Red, 1425 Miles, $10498 V-Storm DL650, White, 2006 Miles, $6298 SYM HD200 Cannonball Scooter, 2006, Blue, 7031 Miles, $2798 December 2015 | 24 | CityBike.com State: Zip: HD200 Cannonball Scooter, 2012, Blue, 13000 Miles, Call for price Triumph Bonneville, 2013, Orange, 8239 Miles, $7498 Speed Triple ABS, 2012, Red, 7939 Miles, $8998 Speed Triple ABS, 2014, Blue, 3 Miles, $10998 Street Triple R, 2014, White, 1696 Miles, $9498 Thruxton 900, 2013, Green, 57 Miles, $8498 Tiger ABS, 2010, Black, 1582 Miles, $7998 Yamaha Bolt 950 C-Spec, 2014, Black, 286 Miles, $7998 Bolt 950 R-Spec, 2014, Gray, 1603 Miles, $6998 Bolt 950, 2014, Black, 3965 Miles, $6998 Bolt 950, 2014, White, 14640 Miles, $6998 FZ1, 2006, Silver, 7740 Miles, $6498 FZ8, 2011, Black, 6469 Miles, $6498 V-Star 250 Blue, 1006 Miles, $4198 YZF-R6, Blue, 899 Miles, $10498 Zuma Scooter 125, 2014, Gray, 84 Miles, $3198 NEW INVENTORY Honda CB1000R, 2014, Black, $9998 (w/ Honda Bonus Bucks) CB1100, $9998 (w/ Honda Bonus Bucks) CB300F, 2015, Red, $3,999 CB500X, 2015, Black, $6299 CB500X, 2014, White, $5998 CBR1000RR, 2015, Red, $13999 CBR300R, 2015, Red, $4898 CBR500R, 2014, White/red/blue, $5998 CBR500R, 2015, Gray, $6299 CBR500R, 2014, Black, $6299 CBR600RR, 2015, Black, $11490 CBR650F, 2015, Black, $8449 CRF100F, 2013, Red, $2498 CRF125, 2014, $2999 (w/ Honda Bonus Bucks) CRF250L, 2015, Red, $4999 CTX1300, 2014, Black, $11498 (w/ Honda Bonus Bucks) CTX1300, 2015, Black, $15999 CTX700, 2014, Burgundy, $6998 CTX700N, 2015, Silver, $6999 Forza Scooter, 2015, Red, $5599 GL1800 Goldwing, 2015, Red, $23999 GL1800 Goldwing Valkyrie, 2015, Red, $17999 GL1800B Goldwing F6B, 2015, Blue, $20499 Grom 125, 2015, Yellow, $3199 Grom 125, 2015, White, $3199 Grom 125, 2015, Black, $3199 Metropolitan Scooter, 2015, $1799 (w/ Honda Bonus Bucks) NC700X, 2015, $7499 NM4, 2015, Black, $10498 PCX150 Scooter, 2015, Black/white, $3449 Ruckus Scooter, 2015, $2449 (w/ Honda Bonus Bucks) Shadow Aero VT750, 2015, Red, $7499 Silver Wing ABS, 2015, Black, $9270 ST1300 ABS, 2015, Black, $18230 VFR800, 2015, White, $12498 VT1300 Fury, 2015, Black, $9999 VT1300 Interstate, 2015, Black, $10999 VT1300 Sabre, 2015, Black, $9999 VT1300 Stateline, 2015, Blue, $9999 VT750 Shadow Phantom, 2015, Black, $7499 VT750 Shadow RS, 2015, Black, $7499 VT750 Shadow Spirit, 2015, Black, $7499 VT750C2F, 2012, Orange, $7498 XR650L, 2015, Red, $6690 F6B, 2013, $14498 (w/ Honda Bonus Bucks) Goldwing 40th Anniversary, 2015, $23998 (w/ Honda Bonus Bucks) Kawasaki Concours 14 ABS, 2015, Green, $15499 EN650 Vulcan S ABS, 2015, $7298 KLR KL650E, 2015, Green, $6599 KLX250, 2015, Black, Call for price KX65, 2013, Green, $2998 Ninja 1000 ABS, 2015, Green, $11999 USED MOTORCYCLES: Two Beemers and a CT 2006 K1200S - Mint, all optons 2000 1150GS - Mint, Ohlins 1977 CT90 - Good Michael’s Motorsports BMW Motorcycle Service, Repair, Restoration Air heads, Oil Heads, Hex heads, K Bikes, F Bikes 880 Piner Rd. Ste 46 Santa Rosa, CA 95403 (707) 575-4132 Independent service of BMW, Ducati, Triumph. Factory certified, and certifiable, too! Fair prices and fast turnaround We love what we do - we solve problems and make people’s machines run their best. Bring us your problem. We’ll solve it for you - nothing that we can’t fix. BRG Racing 925-680-2560 110 2nd Ave. So. - Unit D Pacheco www.brg.com Monkey Moto School MOTO TIRE GUY www.MotoTireGuy.com Motorcycle Tire Services San Francisco - Bay Area (415) 601-2853 Order your tires online, Zero CA sales tax plus Free UPS Ground, then have a Preferred Installer in your local area do the installation and save! Please visit website for details. Custom Design Studios 56 Hamilton Drive # A Novato, Ca. 94949 415 382-6662 www.customdesignstudios.com/ V-Twin Service, Repair, Parts, & Fabrication. Harley Factory Trained Tech. CYCLE SA LVA G MOTOR WORKS BMW PARTS Take a European trip this year! Visit www.motorworks.co.uk • Huge range of new and used parts and accessories for all models from 1970 onwards • UK’s largest independent, 25 years experience • Competitive prices, fast shipping • Expert and friendly advice available • Trade customers welcome Quality Motorcycles 235 Shoreline Hwy. Mill Valley CA (415) 381-5059 We’re not afraid of your old bike. Ed Meagor’s BSA Call Old Ed Meagor at 415.457.5423 That’s right! Ed sent his phone number, so if you’ve been wanting to give him a call about his sweet BSA, now’s the time! -CityBike Classifieds Editor PARTS AND SERVICE Detailing vintage, classic, modern motorcycles ROCKRIDGE TWO WHEELS Need new rubber? Rockridge Two Wheels is offering a $50 mount and balance with the purchase of two tires. Factory techs. 40+ years experience. Full service facility. 510/594-0789 vespawalnutcreek.com 925 938 0600 rockridgetwowheels.com 510 594 0789 For all your Bay Area Vespa / Piaggio / Aprilia needs HELP WANTED ADVANCED CYCLE SERVICE *Motorcycle Service and Repair* • Tires • Service •Insurance estimates Monthly bike storage available Come check us out 1135 Old Bayshore Hwy San Jose, CA 95112 (408) 299-0508 [email protected] — www.advcycles.com DUCATI SUZUKI KAWASAKI YAMAHA Since 1956 Knucklehead Panhead Iron Sportster Shovelhead Evolution Twin Cam Multi Valve 450cc and up Cyl. boring on H.D. only 21050 Mission Blvd. Hayward, 94541 (510) 581-5315 The Junction If you know you can handle a real road then come up and get your reward! Slow smoked BBQ , hand pressed burgers and a long list of great beer. The Junction 47300 Mines Rd. Livermore. At the intersection of Mines & Del Puerto Canyon Roads 11-8 daily (closed Wednesdays)—10-8 weekends. Go there and go nowhere, into the middle-of. EVENT SERVICES Devils Detail Motorcycle Detailing 415 - 439 - 9275 www.thedevilsdetailing.com [email protected] established 2007 Greatness can be in your detail! Come and ride the Sierras! No dirt experience needed! Dual Sport and dirt bike rentals. Guided or map your own course. Skill building classes also available. Easy access from Highway 50 south and west of Tahoe, this side of the hill in Camino, CA. Free secure storage of your car or bike onsite, or we can deliver bikes to many all day riding areas (additional fee applies for delivery). Well-maintained bikes and a rider-owned company makes us a great adventure for the day, weekend or longer. ASK ABOUT OUR SPECIAL $200 3-HOUR INTRO TO DUAL SPORT RIDING TOUR/INSTRUCTION! ALSO SCHEDULING WOMEN’S DIRT AND DUAL SPORT TRAINING CLASSES! **WE OFFER LOWERED DUAL SPORT BIKES! 530-748-3505- www.sierradualsport.com FINE DINING Cycle Salvage - Hayward Cycle Salvage Hayward - your one stop shop for remote controlled motorcycle models, fuzzy helmet slip-on covers, flaming-hair-evilclown graphics kits, moderately-worn vintage motorcycle manuals of all stripes, and replacement kickstand legs that are not too hot and not too cold, but JUST RIGHT Cycle Salvage Hayward 21065 Foothill Blvd Hayward, CA 94541 510-886-2328 Monkey Moto School gets people riding in just one day. Our focused, private classes and small beginner bike are the start of a proven system that will have new riders out and about on a motorcycle with confidence in short order. Available in SF (and beyond by arrangement). Call Evan to get started. 415-359-6479 monkeymotoschool.com Sierra Dual Sport/Dirt Bike Rides, Rentals and Training Mind-Blowing Custom Paint Since 1988 Visit Our Showroom! Contact [email protected] BSA 500 Single Empire Star Cheap $10,000 Firm RIDING SCHOOLS BRG RACING - CONCORD E Ninja 300, 2015, Green, $4999 Ninja 300, 2014, White, $4798 Ninja 300, 2014, Green, $4998 Ninja 300SE, 2015, Black, $5199 Ninja 650, 2015, Green, $7599 Ninja ZX-10R ABS, 2015, Green, $14299 Ninja ZX-10R ABS 30th Anniversary Edition, 2015, Green, $15599 Ninja ZX-6R 636, 2015, Black, $12699 Ninja ZX-6R 636 30th Anniversary Edition, 2015, Green, $12999 Versys 1000LT, 2015, Black, $12799 Versys 650 ABS, 2015, Green, $7999 Versys 659 ABS, 2014, Black, $6998 Versys 659 ABS, 2014, Black, $6998 Versys 650LT, 2015, Green, $8699 Vulcan 1700 Vaquero, 2015, Green, $16699 Vulcan 1700 Voyager, 2015, Black, $17399 Vulcan 900 Classic, 2015, Black, Call for price Vulcan 900 Classic LT, 2015, Black, $8999 Vulcan 900 Custom, 2015, Black, $8499 Vulcan S ABS, 2015, Green, $6999 Z1000 ABS, 2015, Green, $11999 ZG1400, 2013, Black, $11999 ZX-14R ABS, 2015, Green, $14999 ZX-14R ABS 30th Anniversary Edition, 2015, Red, $15899 Lance Powersports Havana Classic 125, 2015, Black, white, sky blue, beige, red - $1899 Havana Classic 150, 2015, White, brown, black, $2198 PCH 125, 2015, Red, white, yellow, black, $1899 PCH 150, 2015, White, green, red, $2198 SYM -- All SYM bikes come with a 2 year factory warranty -Citycom 300i Scooter, 2015, Red or white, $4698 Citycom 300i Scooter, 2015, Gray, $4898 Fiddle II 125 Scooter, 2015, White, sky blue, black, red, or beige, $2298 HD200 EVO Scooter, 2015, Orange, yellow, gray, white, $3495 HD200 Scooter, 2015, Red, gray $3495 Symba, 2015, Sky blue, $2349 Symba Honda Cub, Red, Black, $2349 T2 250i, 2015, Black, White, $3799 Wolf (aka Honda CB150), 2015, Tricolor, red, black, white, $2999 ZERO Motorcycles DS ZF 12.5, 2015, White, $13995 FX 5.7, 2015, Black, $10990 S 12.5, 2015, Yellow, $13995 SR, 2015, Red, $15995 ANNOUNCING: “DUFFYDUZZ Promotions” If you’re planning a M/C event of any sort, whether an Open House, a Special Sale Event, a Competition Event or even a Rally, a “pleasant but not pushy” voice (and your choice of music) can make a huge difference in the excitement and remembrance of your event. Have P.A. / Will Travel... I have been “The Voice” of Ducati Island at Moto G.P. (‘98 - ‘06) the Wilseyville Hare Scrambles (‘98 - ‘12) ...Most recently; La Ducati Day, La Honda, MOTORAMA Car Show, Lafayette, sub’ Announcer at Continental Sports Car Challenge Laguna Seca, Santa Rosa flattrack for Circle Bell Motorsports... and more... References and resume available. Find me on FaceBook: “Duffyduzz Promotions” for all contact info - or - call 510292-9391 - or - E/M: [email protected] Sam and An on the 390s at Thunderhill. Multi-line motorcycle dealer in Vallejo is looking for an experienced motorcycle tech. Must be experienced in all aspects of motorcycle / all-terrain repairs and be able to work by yourself in a busy shop. Hours: 9am to 6pm Tuesday - Saturday. We’re also looking for an experienced motorcycle part sales person. Must be experienced in all aspects of motorcycle and all-terrain parts and accessories sales and be able to work by yourself. Apply by email at [email protected]. Please attach last 5 years work history and manufacturers you are familiar with. LEGAL Bavarian Cycle Works EXPERT Service & Repair Bavarian Cycle Works specializes in new and vintage BMW, modern TRIUMPH and select motorcycle models. Our staff includes a Master Certified Technician and personnel each with over 25 years experience. Nearly all scheduled motorcycle maintenance can be completed within a one day turnaround time. All bikes kept securely indoors, day and night. Come see us! Coats of skins, Chaps, Pants, Vests, Gloves, Boots, Saddle Bags, Helmets, Riding Gear, Fashion & More. All sizes: Kids/Big/Tall. Patches sewn on most while U wait. Clean Repair Alter 952 B Street, Hayward B/W Mission & Main 510-582-5222 LegalShield Have you ever been pulled over by the police on your bike or car and felt you were profiled because of your tattoos or the way you look? You can have emergency access to attorneys, 24 hours a day in 49 states, for as little as $20 a month. Try our service and get your Will done for free, for you and your spouse. Find out how at smith_wg.legalshieldassociate.com or call 510-502-2144 Photo: Max Klein December 2015 | 25 | CityBike.com Tankslapper Wanted: Real Editor For CityBike Another shot from the archives of Ben from SF: Sears Point, June 1976. Randy, from “near Google Headquarters” (palm to face) wrote in to correct Editor Surj, but he went a bit further than most who send “Surj, you suck” emails, going as far as calling for his replacement: We’re sorta vacillating between lost for words and on the same page, Allan. But Bullet Collector is now on the CityBike watch list. RIP Bob Garrett An anonymous reader emailed to tell us of the passing of Bob Garrett. Never seen females riding stupid? I live & work near Google headquarters in Mt. View, and commuting towards Google between 8:00 AM and 9:30 AM is normally done at a walking pace, unless you are on 2 wheels. (Even bicycles outpace cars) And I have seen women doing things which are seemingly nearly suicidal. They are typically on scooters, or very small bikes, so wheelies are not an option, but any sort of craziness beyond that is common. Some of the older Bay Area motorcyclists may not have heard about the recent passing of Bob Garrett. Bob moved to Sonoma many years ago but people in the city probably knew him from involvement within the BMW community. R.I.P. And yes, you do badly need a real editor, one which would explain what an “MRO” is when it is used, and other allusions which are untterly unclear. But we must warn you: the first the new, real-er editor will do is point out that untterly isn’t a word, and that MRO is an acronym, not an allusion. Harsh, Randy. Real harsh, bro. But perhaps accurate, and since we love reader (rider) feedback, we’ve posted a JD (job description) on LI (LinkedIn) in hopes of poaching a real EIC (Editor In Chief) from one of the real moto mags. We’re certain these guys will be banging down the doors of CityBike HQ for the opportunity to run and edit this thing on top of a 60+ hour day job. Seriously, bro. If you cared about America, motorcycling, and apple pie, you’d know what MRO means, and even if you don’t—which you clearly don’t—we’ve defined it six million times, and continue to accompany the first instance of MRO with parenthesis-“Motorcycle Rights Organization”-parenthesis each issue we use it in. Maybe we missed it, and you caught us. OMG (oh my gawd!), the horror. We’re sincerely sorry we’re not keeping the mag up to “near Google headquarters” standards, but honestly, if you’re angling for that EIC position yourself, you’re gonna need to be a little more on the ball with your next writing sample. Horrorball Longtime reader Allan Slaughter wrote in response to Sam’s footballseason-makes-forgood-riding column, “Sports Ball,” in our last issue: Extra points for crazy / creative shit. What do those points get you? Let us know if you find out. Real sticky w hen properly warmed up. Thanks, Sam— Think I played that game once, at 8, and from the razz on my shoulders, back and ass figured I’d played the ball. This old messenger’s pick of viddyviolence is Vartanov’s Bullet Collector, near the end, when all the nadsatinmates band up in fives, ransack the arsenal and make regulation stew of most guards—not without some keen shots of their own casualties, oozing in lurid orthochrome B&W. Or when our hero, hauled in for skipping a lesson, gets hounded by a ravenous short-focus virago and counters her coolly with “Znaida Prokovyevna, why don’t you ever fuck men?” And after the rout of tormentors, when he’s stabbed by his ‘dagger-owning’ twin and double, staggers past an ironic quote from Sergei Yesenin to drown, flailing, in the river, no great sweat. Nexcycle they’ll just switch team colors, know each other and start another round of the same ol’ merry mayhem. “Great playing with you! Come again tomorrow?” My idea of Saturday horrorshow. December 2015 | 26 | CityBike.com Yell at us (or just say hey) at editor@ citybike.com or talk to us on our Facebook page at facebook.com/CityBikeMag. You can also send us an old-timey paper letter, which we think is pretty damn cool. Those go to CityBike Magazine, PO Box 18738, Oakland 94619. Photo: Bob S tokstad Send Us Your Stuff [email protected] PO Box 18783 Oakland, CA 94619 Our 390 Duke working on its night moves at Thunderhill. Photo: Max Klein CYANMAGENTAYELLOWBLACK PLUS 1.9 PAYMENTS AS LOW AS $59/Month 36 MONTHS FOR % FOR QUALIFIED BUYERS *AS LOW AS APR On All New KYMCO Scooters Purchased and Registered Beginning July 1, 2015 - December 31, 2015 at Your Local Participating KYMCO USA Dealer Only. CHICO MOTORSPORTS 1538 PARK AVENUE CHICO, CA 95928 530-345-5247 CYCLE WEST 1375 INDUSTRIAL AVENUE PETALUMA, CA 94952 707-769-5242 SCUDERIA 69 DUBOCE STREET SAN FRANCISCO, CA 94103 415-621-7223 R&M ENTERPRISES SALINAS MOTORCYCLE CENTER SAN JOSE MOTORSPORT 1905C ARNOLD INDUSTRIAL WAY 1286 N. MAIN STREET 1886 WEST SAN CARLOS ST CONCORD, CA 94520 SALINAS, CA 93906 SAN JOSE, CA 95128 925-798-4360 831-295-0205 408-295-0205 ROCKRIDGE TWO WHEELS 5291 COLLEGE AVENUE OAKLAND, CA 94618 510-594-0789 SCOOTER CITY 614 16TH STREET SACRAMENTO, CA 95814 916-448-6422 VERACOM MITSUBISHI 790 NORTH SAN MATEO DR SAN MATEO, CA 94401 650-340-7199 POWERSPORTS OF VALLEJO 111 TENNESSEE STREET VALLEJO, CA 94590 707-644-3756 Choose Your Own Path KYMCOUSA.com facebook.com/KYMCO.Scooters twitter & Instagram @kymco_usa The Official Scooter and SxS 1.9% for 36 Months [3.53% APR*] $0 DOWN | 1.9% INTEREST RATE | $30.03 PER $1,000 FINANCED *Example: On a purchase where the Amount Financed is $1,999 your Down Payment is $0 with 36 monthly payments of $58.60 each. Interest Rate is 1.9% [ANNUAL PERCENTAGE RATE is 3.53% (E)]. For other Amounts Financed, the payment would be approximately $30.03 per $1,000 financed. Note: Subject to credit approval. Approval, and any rates and terms provided, are based on credit worthiness. Other financing offers are available. See your local dealer for details. Rate advertised is based on bureau risk score of 675 debt to income ratio of 45% or less. Minimum Amount Financed $1,500; Maximum Amount Financed $50,000. Other qualifications and restrictions may apply. An origination fee of $50 will be added to the amount financed in the above example. Financing promotions void where prohibited. Offer effective on all new and unused KYMCO Scooters purchased from a participating KYMCO USA dealer between 7/1/2015 and 12/31/2015. Offer subject to change without notice. [“E”] means estimate. © KYMCOUSA 2015 KYMCO vehicles meet all applicable Federal Motor Vehicle Safety and EPA standards. Take a riding skills course. For the course nearest you, call the Motorcycle Safety Foundation at 1-800-446-9227. For your safety, always wear a helmet, eye protection and protective clothing. Never operate under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Avoid excessive speed and stunt driving..