LOVE LOVE - Audacious Church

CHURCH
LOVE
LOVE
jun • jul • aug • sep 2013
CONTENTS
10 24 32 40
DAUGHTERS
Sophia Barrett
ON THAT DAY
MARRIAGE
Gary & Hermione Oakley Stuart & Julie Keir
TEAM TIME
Sarah Sharpe
3
S
ummer is always an exciting time as we
start to gear up for !Audacious Conference. This
year is certainly no exception with our ten-year
celebrations nearly upon us. The !Audacious band
have been in the studio for the last few weeks
writing and recording ten songs available for you
to download and learn. Each week the team have
been filming the recording process and we have
had some special extended family, including Martin
Smith (formerly of Delirious?) and Andy Waddams
(pre-show king) sharing their conference memories
with us. We hope you enjoy all of the online
content and that it gets you excited and expectant
for all that God is going to do in our tenth year!
Pastors Russell Evans and Ben Prescott will be
with us from Planetshakers, Australia. If you were
here during Russell’s “rain” message last year, you’ll
know you can’t afford NOT to be there!
e
h l l o.
4
The last few months have seen an incredible shift
in our praise as a Church. We are so blessed by
your stories of personal, provisional and spiritual
breakthrough as you have taken hold of the fact
that there is real power in enthusiastic praise.
Please keep filling in your praise report cards on
a Sunday so that we can celebrate with you, and
you in turn can encourage others on their journey.
We constantly see the knock-on impact that one
person’s testimony can have on the faith of a
neighbour.
As a Church we also celebrate our sixth birthday at
the end of the summer. Can you believe how much
we have done in that short time? As our building
work continues we thank you for your giving, and
for sharing the dream with us. We will keep you
updated with news of our Heart for the House
offering, and you will see a few more changes over
the coming months - each to better equip us to do
church excellently, to serve our community better
and ultimately create the space to accomodate a
traffic-stopping church! Thanks for each and every
one of you who carries this vision with us. Here’s to
a great summer!
All our love
Glyn & Sophia
5
BLING BOUTIQUE WOMEN’S CONFERENCE
27/28 SEPT 2013
Beautiful women, what
is Bling Conference
“Run” all about?
As God’s daughters we
were designed in the
heart of our heavenly
Father to run a race
that he has marked out
for each of us. This is
what we are called for,
what we are anointed for, what we were destined
for. We don’t run from anything as much as we run
in his unfailing love and his divine purpose. Our
arena is positioned under an open heaven. The
stands are full of those who have run before us and
who now urge us on to make our mark in history.
We run with passion, power and perseverance. We
run having already won the victory in Christ.
10
What is our race? The task we’ve been called
to is simple: to make our Lord Jesus known and
to establish his Kingdom on earth. How that is
expressed is as varied and unique as threads in a
tapestry but the effect of us all running our races is
breath-taking, and it glorifies our God in Heaven.
Bling conference 2013 is an opportunity to call out
the God greatness that He has put inside you. For
some who are already running their race it will be
a time to rest, replenish and ‘refire’ for the next leg.
For others it will be a time to connect with their
God given destiny for the first time and start to
run. No matter where we are on our race, there is
always more in us to be drawn out than we could
ever imagine.
To all who are coming for the first time and don’t
know what to expect. It’s just for us girls of all
ages, backgrounds and walks of life. So if you’re
wondering if its your ‘thing’ it definitely is. We’ll
have times of worship and being impacted by
some powerful preaching. Sam Evans is coming
to be with us again and we couldn’t be more
excited. She is the senior pastor with her husband,
Russell of Planetshakers City Church, in Melbourne,
Australia. Sam is great woman of God who is
running her race with uncompromising focus and
zeal. She understands the challenges we all face
on our journey and she’ll come with a word from
God’s heart for us.
As well as all of this you will meet new friends
to ‘run with’ and be well served by some of the
amazing men of !Audacious Church. There will be
child-care available too!
Above all expect God to come and meet with
you. Expect new levels of freedom and faith. And
always expect what God can do beyond your
expectation. “Therefore, since we are surrounded
by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off
everything that hinders and the sin that so easily
entangles. And let us run with perseverance the
race marked out for us, ...” (Hebrews 12:1)
Can’t wait to see you there!
With much love,
Sophia x
DON’T FORGET THESE KEY DATES
IN THE BLING CALENDAR
14th June 7:30pm
Last in the ‘Push’ series
12th July 7:30pmTea Party
27/28 Sept
Bling Conference
11
The
•
•
•
highlights of this are:
Soundproofing to the main hall roof
New Foyer design giving more seating areas
Installed new heaters in the Main auditorium
and Foyer
• Improved screen, staging, cameras and
lighting in the main auditorium
• Built music studio, green room and media
room back stage.
Thanks so much for all you have given, both time
and money, to make this happen.
Over the next few months you will see other
exciting projects get underway: •
•
12
Increased creche facility to allow for the
increase in number of parents and young
children who attend on a Sunday.
Improved connections area to ensure any
guests you bring to church can relax in style.
The longer-term plans for this year are to install a
soundproof wall to the rear of the stage to allow
office accommodation to be built and also larger
kids’ facilities and break out spaces for midweek
church. Look out for tiered seating to the rear of
the auditorium too, along with improved external
frontage and accessibility for pedestrians!
These are
exciting times
and we love
that you’re
on board and
with us for
the ride!
MEN: Join us on a Tuesday evening,
once a month, to get stuff done! Sign up at
audaciouschurch.com/brotherhood
Since the last Heart for the House offering (May
2012) we have spent an incredible £226,000
on improving the building and the facilities of
!Audacious Church
BROTHERHOOD
PROJECTS
BUILDING
Huge
thanks to
Lakewood
Guild for
all the
work
on the
building.
13
!AUDACIOUS CONFERENCE IS TEN
Over the last ten years, thousands of lives
have been impacted through our conferences,
leadership academy, band tours and radio shows,
as well as through our partnerships with God TV
and Compassion.
To celebrate ten years of !Audacious Conference,
the band are spending ten weeks in the studio
recording ten tracks. Come along for the ride; at
the end of each week, for ten weeks, you will be
able to grab a FREE download.
Follow the band’s progress as they write and share
!Audacious memories and get heaps of FREE
content including videos, articles, songs and chord
charts.
To get connected, grab all the free content
and download free tracks stay plugged in to
audaciouschurch.com/extraordinary
Follow the band on Twitter and stay tuned to our
Facebook page.
14
audaciouschurch.com/extraordinary
audaciousrevolution
audaciousband / live audacious
15
LOVE,
AMAZING
LOVE
BY MATT HILL
I’m turning 30 tomorrow, and that is a big thing in
my head! All of a sudden I am hit by the realisation
that I am a fully grown adult. I have a young,
growing family, I have a house, a mortgage, a car
(that requires tax and a service!), bills to pay, an
amazing church that is growing and expanding, the
list goes on….
How easy it is, as we fill our world with the stuff of
life, that God is soon reduced to an hour on Sunday
morning and the odd prayer in times of crisis.
The song ‘Love, Amazing Love’ was birthed from
a series called Bigger Than. The amazing truth
that no matter how great our problem, our need
or even our success, God is still bigger. The Bible
says He is ‘able to do immeasurably more than
we could ask or imagine’ – (Ephesians 3:20). I
love this thought – not only that He is bigger than
the Universe, but that He is also bigger than our
wildest dreams.
This got me thinking; how can we possibly put
into words the wonder, the character and nature
of a God who doesn’t just express love, but IS
love? How can we start to describe a God when
our limited English vocabulary will never do Him
justice? We can’t - but the power of worship is that
even our feeblest attempt to lift up the name of
Jesus can be pleasing to Him! (Psalm 19:14).
My initial idea was a play on words; the line
‘Amazing Love runs in Your blood’. I was trying to
use one line to say many things - that Love is in
God’s nature, and at the same time to evoke the
picture of love flowing to Earth as Jesus shed His
blood on the cross for us.
When we receive this incredible love I believe that
we are compelled to pour it out into our world; to
carry the fire of love to a lost and broken world
(hence the bridge ‘fire burns, fire burns within
us, our hope, our hope is Jesus’). I am reminded
of Jeremiah who said ‘like a fire shut up in my
bones…’ (Jeremiah 20:9).
Just imagine the church in this nation rising up
with that fire of hope, of love and passion for the
lost. Imagine the ‘light of the world’ really shining
as God intended, shouting a battle cry of praise
that Jesus is not a bolt-on accessory to 21st
century life. He’s not a small insignificant myth for
people who get a kick out of religious ceremony.
No, He is the beginning and the end, the designer
and the perfector, He is bigger than sin and death,
bigger than our past and our future, bigger even
than our imagination.
1 Corinthians 1:25 says that even ‘the foolishness
of God is greater than human wisdom’. When we
see God as He truly is, His holiness and perfection
certainly brings us down to size, but as one of His
beloved children it fills me with great confidence to
look every obstacle in the eye and say ‘I am just a
man, but My Dad is Bigger Than YOU!’
“THIS GOT
ME THINKING;
HOW CAN
WE POSSIBLY
PUT INTO
WORDS THE
WONDER, THE
CHARACTER
AND NATURE
OF A GOD WHO
DOESN’T JUST
EXPRESS LOVE,
BUT IS LOVE?”
TEN YEARS OF !AUDACIOUS CONFERENCE
18
19
BREAKTHROUGH
PRAISE
2013 has so far been a year of next-level praise, as we revistied some of
the hallmark teaching of !Audacious Church in our Signature Series. We
asked what breakthrough praise looks like to you.
20
JONNY
CUMMINGS
MEAGAN
WILLIAMS
HAZEL
JONES
I love the story in the
bible when the religious
people of the day
told Jesus to keep his
disciples quiet - He
simply turned to them
and said “if they keep
quiet then the stones
will cry out” When I
look back and think of
who I was before Jesus
found me I simply can’t
contain my praise; when
I think of how he picked
me up and turned my
life around - I know
I won’t be outdone
by a stone! Whatever
my circumstance and
whatever my season,
whether I’m on the
mountaintop or down in
the valleys my God will
be praised.
I love that David makes
the life statement “I
will praise the Lord!”
54 times! Praise is a
choice, not a feeling.
Like David, there are
times my heart leaps
with praise and there
are times I must make
myself sing and dance.
No matter what the
circumstance, one thing
is true - just one minute
praising God “sets my
mind on things above”
(Colossians 3:2). Praise
takes my focus from
this earth to a realm
beyond my own where
anything is possible.
It’s the moment my
DNA connects with its
Creator and, praise the
Lord, I can take as many
moments as I like!
When my darling
husband Philip died
it was midnight on
a Saturday. I knew
without a shadow of
a doubt that the only
place I could be on
the Sunday morning
was with my spiritual
family in the house
of God, praising and
worshipping my
loving Father. From
that moment on,
thanksgiving and
worship have continued
to be all consuming,
ongoing in my life. My
focus is on my God and
not on me and my own
circumstances,
21
CAMILIO OCHOA
When we understand
that we must praise Him
despite our situation
we become ‘doers of
the Word’. For me it’s
just a matter of thinking
about His greatness and
His awesomeness.Since
we have been talking
about praise at Church
my breakthrough
has been just that,
learning how to praise
him at all times, in all
circumstances, fighting
my flesh, craving His
presence so I can
hunger more for Him.
Every time we read in
the bible about Praise
it’s a command, not
a suggestion. We can
train our souls to praise
God for who He is and
base our praise on our
thanksgiving for what
He’s done for us.
22
RHONA CLEGG
HANNAH RAESIDE
God really spoke
to me when Pastor
Glyn was talking
about the “theology
of jumpology”; He
was talking about
the Greek word that
our English word
‘enthusiasm’ comes
from, ‘En Theos’ which
means ‘in God’. WOW!
When we are IN God
our praise can move
mountains because
we learn who we are
IN GOD. That is what
I try to share every
time I worship Him.
Whether with my voice,
through my trumpet
or any instrument or
action that I do, I do it
because I know who I
am in Him and I know
who He is in me! May
His powerful name be
glorified forever.
In Psalm 16:11 David
declares “You will fill
me with joy in Your
presence”. Pastor Glyn
uses the illustration
of an ‘unhappy bride’.
It’s an impossible
image, it just kind
of jars with you. It
reminds me to choose
to be enthusiastic in
my praise; to choose
God’s presence as a
place where there is
a promise of joy. When
I choose enthusiastic
praise, rather than
enthusiastically moping
(!), just like that bride I
CANNOT be depressed
because God comes
to make His home with
me. God has wired us to
find real, deep joy when
we tell Him how much
we love Him! It’s genius
when you think about it!
Just now I’m going
through a bit of a hard
time doing a job I have
really struggled with
for years; as I drive
to work I really don’t
want to get there!
Whenever depression
tries to settle on me
I remember Pastor
Glyn’s message about
the power of praise. I
put on my !Audacious
worship CDs in the car
and really focus my
mind on praising Jesus
and what He has done
for me. By the time I
reach my clients my
mind is always renewed
and I even look forward
to my day! There really
is power in praising
God!
23
THAT
When Gary
and Hermione
Oakley heard
that their baby
daughter Luella
was in hospital
in a coma, they
were over two
hours away in
Cheltenham.
But on that day,
they learned
what it really
means to trust
in God.
24
The Oakleys are an amazing family in !Audacious
Church. Recently they received a phone call
with some news that no parent wishes to hear.
We asked mother and father of two, Gary and
Hermione, to share their incredible story of faith
and prayer with us.
Hermione: We are both photographers, and were
shooting at a wedding in Cheltenham. We went
to check in to our hotel at five o’clock and pay up
front at the desk, but the night shift staff weren’t
available until the early morning. We called round
all the taxi companies in Cheltenham and they
were all saying it would be at least an hour, maybe
two, until one was available. So we just thought,
“let’s drive to the venue, leave our car there and
get a taxi back”. As soon as we got back we got
a phone call saying our baby daughter Luella had
been fitting, wouldn’t stop and had been rushed to
hospital in Bolton. We just had to get up and leave.
Luckily there was a second photographer who
could carry on for us. Looking back now, all those
things that happened [with the taxi and hotel] just
showed that God knew this was going to happen;
He totally knew. We now had our car there with us
ready to go; we hadn’t even paid for the hotel.
The drive back to Manchester was two and a half
hours. I’ve never experienced that feeling before.
I’ve never had that real worry with my children. I
was in a panic. I was ringing everyone I knew who
was a Christian. I phoned Dawn and Bill Moffatt
who are our great friends and lead our Life Group.
Dawn was constantly praying on the phone the
whole way with us. I was ringing Steph and Gavin
Adlam, Daryl and Mags Cross (more friends from
our Life Group); they were all together so they
were all ready, two minutes from the hospital.
They went straight there. I was ringing everyone,
trying to understand what to do! We were just in
complete panic really. It was a really bad night;
the weather was terrible, the rain was torrential.
We were trying to drive as fast as we could up
the motorway but we couldn’t even really see!
It was awful. We cried out to God to whole way.
Screaming, shouting and praying.
It’s difficult for someone to understand the
situation. I was getting phone calls every five
minutes saying “Are you closer?” “How many miles
left now?” “You need to get here!” but the only
people who really could really understand the
severity of the whole situation were those people
who had gone straight to the hospital and were
there. It was hard even for us to understand what
was really happening.
Dawn and Bill asked if we wanted them to go to
the hospital. I said “Yes, we’ll see you in about two
hours”. Dawn messaged me back saying she’d
see us soon. I said “Didn’t you get my message?
We are two hours away!” She just said “Yes, don’t
worry, we’re all already here. We’ll see you when
you get here.” I was blown away. They didn’t even
wait for us, they just went. When we got there Bill
met us at the roundabout outside so we didn’t
even have to park our car. We ran in. There were
these six amazing people from Church just there
already praying for our daughter. It was amazing.
My sister said the relief she felt when people
arrived was massive. To have people there praying,
to surround her; it was huge. Luella was never on
her own while we weren’t there. When we arrived
inside the hospital she had been induced into a
coma so that she would stop fitting. At the time
they don’t tell you in those words. She was on a
25
life-support machine by the time we got there so
she was peaceful. They didn’t tell us too much.
They said “maybe meningitis”, though there were
a number of possible other viral things that it
could have been at this point. They were speaking
things over her as they were doing tests, that she
could be brain damaged because she had been
fitting for two hours. They couldn’t get her to stop
which is why they induced her into the coma. She
was responding poorly to these tests they were
carrying out, which was apparently a sign of brain
damage. Whatever they were trying to get her
body to do, it was doing the opposite movements;
in the opposite direction. They said “that’s a bad
sign, a sign of brain damage”. Mags, a nurse, could
understand the medical terms they were using so
every time they said something like that she would
send a text to Steph who was in the parents’ room,
marching around praying in there. She was praying
against anything negative they were saying over
Luella.
“THERE WERE
THESE SIX
AMAZING
PEOPLE FROM
CHURCH
JUST THERE
ALREADY
PRAYING
FOR OUR
DAUGHTER. IT
WAS AMAZING”
26
Mags and Daryl didn’t leave us. They stayed up
all night with us in Liverpool. I got really sick but
they were there to make sure that nobody left our
daughter’s side. I couldn’t be in the room. I really
wanted to be near her but if I even walked into the
room she was in I got the shakes and anxiety, I got
hot, I felt sick. I couldn’t cope with it. I desparately
wanted to be in there, praying. I was angry. I
told Mags and she said “Right, lets pray!” So we
prayed in the corridor in Alderhey that I would be
physically able to go in there and see Luella. Up
until that point I couldn’t even look at pictures of
her that people were bringing me. After we prayed
I said “I’m going in!” I went through the door - and
those feelings were just gone! I sat by her side.
That really was a miracle in itself. Gary and I were
both exhausted. Those guys did shifts so that we
could rest and that Luella was never left on her
own, and was constantly being prayed for.
Gary: Because Luella had been dedicated at
!Audacious Church a couple of weeks before, there
was something that we could really take hold of,
that we could stand on during that drive home and
during the wait in hospital. Those same friends that
were there that day declaring the promises that
God had spoken over her life, were present just two
weeks before at the dedication. We had so much to
hold on to. It was so reassuring for us because we
were getting so many texts from people at Church
saying they were praying. We knew that people
knew who she was too because of her dedication.
It was weird; nobody really gave us an “all clear”.
They took Luella off life-support just to check if
she had stopped fitting. They would slowly bring
her sedation up and see if she had stopped. The
first time they did this was amazing. We could
see her coming round a bit. We went home from
Liverpool but the test results weren’t coming back
clear - she was just “getting better!” Nothing clear
was showing up. No-one could understand it. The
only thing the doctors could say was that it could
have been a urine infection, but no-one ever really
diagnosed anything. She was just considered
well enough to go home. No ill effects. No lasting
damage. She’s exactly the same girl. It’s brilliant!
H: Luella was in hospital for a week in total. We
went to Alderhey Hospital in Liverpool that night
and she was on life-support there for two days.
It’s the first time we’ve really had to pray in
desperation. It was the first time I think we really
believed that God would come through; not just
“ IT WAS
THE FIRST
TIME I THINK
WE REALLY
BELIEVED
THAT GOD
WOULD COME
THROUGH; NOT
JUST PRAYING
IN THE HOPE
THAT HE
WOULD, BUT
ABSOLUTELY
CLAIMING THAT
HE WOULD
HEAL HER”
27
spoken over her life. He didn’t leave us through
that whole time, even when it was hard. It sounds
cliché somehow, “He never leaves you”, but you
know, even though it looked awful it never stopped
looking “bright” at the same time!
“IF WE DIDN’T
HAVE GOD TO
CRY OUT TO,
WHAT WOULD
WE HAVE
DONE?”
praying in the hope that He would, but absolutely
claiming that He would heal her. As soon as there
was a little bit of doubt I would have someone in
my ear saying “two weeks ago she had a destiny
written for her, this is not what it’s about…” I just
knew she would be fine, as awful as it was at the
same time. I just had a sense she really would be
OK. I believed in the promises God had previously
28
G: We were saying “If we didn’t have God to pray
to, what would we do?” During that two-and-ahalf-hour journey in the car, if we didn’t have God
to cry out to, what would we have done? We know
He heard our prayers and that He was listening
to us. He was for us, on our side. It was just an
amazing feeling to have! I had this overwhelming
sense in the car, I said to Hermione, “We just
need to praise Him.” I think its something that we
really learned at !Audacious Church. I don’t think I
would have ever gone to that place. I think I would
have always just said “God, You need to hear me.
You need to sort this out!” but I had a sense that
actually, even in this time of desperation, we just
needed to praise Him. For ten minutes straight we
just thanked Him for how awesome He is, praising
His name. It felt so weird because we were both
crying our eyes out, but we were still thanking him
in such a dark time. It was a really good moment.
We were amazed at how the Church reacted to our
situation. People didn’t even ask us if we needed
help, everyone just got straight onto it. They went
to the hospital, they were praying; we didn’t even
need to ask. I was absolutely amazed and God
was so faithful. Even at the time, even in the valley
of the shadow of death, He was there guiding us
Please share your Praise Report with us on
Sundays by filling in a form as you arrive at
reception. We want to celebrate with you!
iBelieve is a rolling three week
course, designed to inspire and
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with God.
If your foundation is a bit on the wonky side
then everything you build could suddenly come
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i believe
RE:VIEW
In light of the new Pre-Marriage and Marriage courses running
fortnightly on Wednsedays, our !Audacious Resources team wanted
to throw the spotlight on a few books that might prove helpful when it
comes to love, life and relationships.
REAL MARRIAGE £9.99
Reviewed by Iain and Megan Wraight
From the author...
“This book really helped our marriage; one chapter
is called ‘New Marriage, Same Spouse’ and that’s
exactly where we are now!
“This is not your
average sermon series
on marriage. We won’t
give you five steps to
happiness. We won’t
talk about sex in code.
We won’t talk about
how you can fix your
marriage. No, this is a
sermon series about
Jesus—and what he has
to say about marriage
through the Bible.”
It was great for our journey to healing as we were
coming through a difficult time and it got us
talking and working through things that we hadn’t
previously thought about - which lead to good
changes. We loved how the Driscolls talked about
friendship in a God-focused marriage, and got us
to think about how the most important day in our
marriage is our last day.
This book is so honest. It’s a great tool for all areas
in your marriage; we really recommend it to all
married couples!”
30
– Mark Driscoll
THE MEANING OF
MARRIAGE - 12.99
THE 5 LOVE
LANGUAGES - £9.99
LOVING OUR KIDS ON
PURPOSE - £11.99
!AUDACIOUS
RESOURCES WEBSITE
Respected Pastor
and World Renowned
Theologian Timothy
Keller shares an
extraordinarily insightful
look at the keys to
happiness in marriage
that will inspire
Christians, skeptics,
singles, long-time
married couples, and
those about to be
engaged.
“What is your Love
Language?” What if you
could say or do just the
right thing guaranteed
to make that special
someone feel loved?
The secret is learning
the right love language!
Millions of couples have
learned the simple
way to express their
feelings as singletons
or for couples to bring
joy back into marriage
through this New York
Times Best Seller.
Loving Our Kids on
Purpose combines
the principles of the
Kingdom of God
and revival to form a
powerful strategy for
parents. Introducing
paradigms, perceptions,
skills, and ideas that
will help parents reduce
fear by eliminating the
tool of punishment
and strengthening the
core character of their
children by empowering
their self-control
and value for their
relationship with their
parents.
All of !Audacious’ own
stock is now available
via the Resources
website. We also now
deliver worldwide so
if you have friends
or relatives overseas
that you want to bless
you can send directly
from us. If you’ve seen
something that we
don’t have in stock but
you’d like to buy, then
let one of the Resources
team know on a Sunday
Have a look around at
audaciousresources.com
If you enjoy a message and want to listen again
you can order it the same day and have it in your
hands that same week! Fill out an order form at
!Audacious Resources.
31
SECONDS OUT
Married for almost twenty years, Pastors Stuart and Julie Keir have had
their own fair share of ups and downs. But what happens when they
find themselves in conflict? Here are their ten rules for a clean fight.
“Marriage;” says Peter Cook in The Princess Bride,
“That dream within a dream.” Twenty years ago
my princess walked down the aisle and became
my bride and it has been a fairy tale ever since.
We have skipped from joyous moment to joyous
moment with never a cross thought let alone word
between us... OK, maybe not quite like that!
The challenge of marriage is always the same;
there are two people involved who each have an
opinion. Depending on the strength of that opinion,
the investment you have made in one another
and the way the wind is blowing at that specific
moment, an opinion has the potential to become
a decision. A decision could easily become an
entrenched fortification and so a badly worded
sentence can easily become the cause of conflict.In
every relationship you will reach crossroads where
conflict is possible; marriage is no exception. Here
are our ten rules for a clean fight
32
1. DON’T BRING UP THE PAST
Make sure you are not throwing in every single
thing you have ever disagreed about before this
breeds resentment.
“The word resentment expresses what happens if
the cycle of blame goes uninterrupted. It means
literally, “to feel again”: Resentment clings to the
past, relives it over and over, picks each fresh scab
so that the wound never heals.” Philip Yancey,
‘What’s So Amazing About Grace’.
This is not the Biblical way of dealing with past
disagreement. Psalm 103 says “as far as the east
is from the west”; this is how God deals with our
failures and Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 13:5 “love
keeps no record of wrongs”.
2. NEVER SAY “YOU ALWAYS, YOU NEVER”
If you are choosing to disagree then know
exactly what it is you are disagreeing about!
Generalisations are not helpful in knowing whether
33
the problem has been addressed and whether we
are able to move forward. Generalisations also
mask the true statement and in disagreement we
must be clear:
“You never lift a finger to help.” = “I’m shattered
and would really appreciate your help.”
“You always come home late.” = “I struggle to put
the kids to bed and do the housework alone.”
“You never think of anyone except yourself.” = “I
am upset as you don’t seem to be interested in me
when we are together.”
“You’re always talking on your phone.” = “I feel hurt
when you spend so much of the evening on the
phone rather than talking to me.”
3. CHOOSE YOUR OWN WORDS
A marriage is not lived out in isolation to the
outside world; our friends, family and aquaintances
often have opinions that they are really happy to
dump... sorry, share, with you. If you are fighting
over something, make sure what you say is what
you think and not someone elses opinion lumped
in to add weight to your argument!
4. CHOOSE THE RIGHT TIME
A survey by Relate revealed that half of all
arguments between couples take place in the
evenings and a quarter of those surveyed admitted
to arguing in the stressful moments leading up to a
special occasion. Three keys to choosing the right
time are: i. Develop self control: Just because something is
at the forefront of your mind now, doesn’t mean
that now is the best time to bring it up.
ii. Early in our marriage most arguments happened
before bed, before leaving the house on the way
somewhere or before a holiday (basically when we
were tired and our defenses were down). When
34
you are feeling like this, everything seems worse
anyway. Your perspective is dulled and distorted.
iii. Identify when your good and bad times are; we
never hold a major conversation after 10 o’clock at
night as we’re both just too tired.
5. IDENTIFY THE REAL OPPONENT
Make sure you are personally at peace with God.
Our ability to connect with others flows out of our
relationship with Him. Conflict in relationship often
occurs because we are expecting people to meet
needs in us that only God can meet. When I’ve not
been spending time with God, or I am frustrated
with God then it can be seen in my relationships.
Discontentment with own life and my walk with
“SACRIFICE IS MUCH MORE
HEALTHY THAN WINNING
AND WOUNDING”
God can somehow become my spouse’s fault.
The person you are married to is not your saviour
– only God can meet your deepest needs. Ask
yourself this key question; “Am I expecting my
partner to meet needs that only God can meet?”
6. ONE ARGUMENT AT A TIME
Remember, you are not supposed to be attacking a
person. When you destroy your spouse with words
or by ignoring them you are actually destroying
yourself because you are one. In Colossians 4:6 it
says, “Be gracious with your speech. The goal is
to bring out the best in others in a conversation,
not put them down, not cut them out.” Be clear
what this argument is about and don’t add in extra
things to strengthen your side of the argument.
If you find yourself regularly in heated arguments
you need to decide some rules of engagement
when you are in a time of peace. A key word of
phrase could be agreed between you that initiates
a ten minute break in ‘hostilities’ so that when
things are coming to the boil you have the space
to cool down. “A man has joy in speaking an apt
answer, and a word spoken at the right moment
how good it is!” Prov 15:23 AMP
10. THERE IS NO WINNER
In marriage, if one of you wins an argument then
the other one loses. The moment you have a loser,
the reality is that you both lost. Arguments, conflict
and disagreement in a marriage are not to be used
to score points but instead are to be resolved for
the sake of the marriage. Resolution may well take
sacrifice, but sacrifice is much more healthy than
8. BE HONEST ABOUT UNSPOKEN, INTERNAL
CONFLICT
Some conflict plays out in our thoughts that we
rarely, if ever, speak to our partner about. It comes
out in our body language or in passive aggressive
behaviour. John Bevere speaks about the movies
we allow to play on the “screen” of our hearts. We
can choose movies of hope, faith and possibility
or we can choose to play old movies of hurt,
disappointment, a perceived failure of our partner,
resentment and hopelessness. If we continue to
allow that movie to play, our internal conflict will
build up. The more we dwell on it, the more it will
build. “I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds
and meditating on things true, noble, reputable,,
authentic, compelling, gracious - the best, not the
worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise,
not things to curse.” Phillippians 4:8
9. REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE FIGHTING;
REMIND THEM WHO THEY ARE
Conflict in marriage is different than conflict on
the battlefield – your partner is not your enemy!
Philippians 4:5 says, “Make it as clear as you can
that you’re on their side, working with them
and not against them”. Take the time to call one
another up and say “you are better than that”.
SEE PAGE 38 FOR DETAILS OF OUR
MARRIAGE AND PRE-MARRIAGE
COURSES IN JUNE & JULY
7. CALL A TIME OUT
35
THIS SUMMER IN
SAVE THE DATE:
1830s SUMMER SOIRÉE
17 August | 7-11 PM | Great John St. Hotel
Glad Rags, Gramophones & Good Times
There’s so much
happening for young
adults over the next few
months. Check out our
page on the website
for weekly thoughts
and also Convoy, our
new calendar of road
trips and outings
(highlighted right).
Make sure you book
your tickets for our
Summer Soiree, a
‘get-your-glad-ragson’ event for all young
adults to celebrate
summer in style, meet
new people and have a
grown-up good time! To
get involved or join the
team give us a shout.
Paul & Eira
Garner
36
convoy
making the most of summer
9th June
Stockport Vintage Fair
22nd June Bikeride round Ullswater & pub lunch
6th July Outdoor film at Screenfields
26th July
Manchester Jazz Festival
27th July
RHS Tatton Flower Show
24th August
Didsbury picnic
31th August Kendal Mintfest
7th September
Brimham Rocks / High tea in Pateley Bridge
AUDACIOUSCHURCH.COM/YOUNG-ADULTS
37
SUNDAY SPEAKERS
WEDNESDAY
CHURCH
JUN
JUL
5TH & 19TH
Life Groups
12TH & 26TH
• Marriage Course
• Pre-Marriage Course
• Teaching series: Walking With the Holy Spirit
3RD
Nights of Fire with Ps Glyn Barrett
10TH & 24TH
Life Groups
17TH
AUG
SEP
17TH
TBC
!Audacious Conference 2013
Life Groups BBQs (ask your leader for details)
11TH & 25TH
Life Groups
18TH
38
!Audacious 2013 volunteer night
Champions Night for all Sunday teams
rev
NICKY
ps
BEN
3o 4
gumbel
Holy Trinity Brompton
/ Alpha, LONDON, UK
prescott
Planetshakers
AUS
AUG
JUN
We are honoured to
have Nicky Gumbel with
us for a full Sunday of
inspirational teaching.
Founder of alpha and
Reverend of Holy Trinity
Brompton, we know
Nicky’s insight and
wisdom will change the
way we see things!
Ben Prescott heads
up PlanetBoom
youth ministry at
Planetshakers in
Melbourne. We’ve never
had the privilege of
hearing Ben speak here
yet but know we’re in
for a treat!
ps RUSSELL
evans
Planetshakers
AUS
Russ is Senior Pastor
at Planetshakers,
Australia. He is a fullyfledged member of the
!Audacious family. If
you were at conference
last year you will know
that He always brings a
timely word to take us
to the next level!
11
AUG
SAM
29
ps
evans
Planetshakers
AUS
SEP
We love Sam! Married
to Russell, Sam is
another extendedfamily member.
Speaking truth to our
ladies at Bling 2013,
she is staying on to
celebrate our 3rd
Birthday with us this
September.
39
What three words would you use to describe how
you feel after a great sunday?
Excited, enthused, ready-for-bed!!
L
#CHAMPION
TIME
How many Champions do you think it takes to run
an incredible full day of Sunday services?
A) 20 B) 75 C) 200
The answer is actually C - a whopping 200
people! Sarah Sharpe is just one of these amazing
champions who make things happen in the life of
!Audacious Church. She is an incredible mum to
three fun kids, a brilliant wife to Dave our genius
financial manager and she used to live in Wales!
She uses her powerful brain, beautiful personality
and top-drawer people skills to run !Audacious
Church operations. Sarah is often one of the first
in and last out on a Sunday and is an inspiration
to many. We love her for the fact that she always
‘makes it happen’ in both her personal life, and
when she is being an !Audacious Champion. There
are very few things that have stopped her from
living out her full purpose. We asked her to tell us
what she loves about serving in Church.
40
When you were 18, how did you think you would
outwork your ‘purpose’?
I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do at 18 but I’ve
always had a heart for people and been passionate
about serving in Church. I’ve never actually had a
specific role in mind but have always been excited
about seeing the local Church advance!
What’s the most rewarding thing about your role?
I love working with all the teams across the life of
!Audacious, and seeing the effect that each team
has on the bigger picture of church as people’s
lives are impacted by God.
If you had £500 to spend in one day how would
you spend the money? (You can’t keep it!)
I would pay for six children to go to
!Audacious Kids camp!
What three qualities do you think a great
!Audacious Champion needs?
A good attitude; a heart to learn and
grow; a love for people.
Who inspires you?
Pastor Sophia, my kids and hubby,
Christine Caine, Jack Bauer and
Michael Jackson!
Build a Church with us that stops the
traffic! Sign up to be a Champion; just
stop anyone on team on a Sunday and
ask “How can i get involved?”
41
Life Groups are small groups
meeting in homes all around
Manchester for coffee, a DVD,
discussion and cake - the best
way to connect and make friends.
Alternate Wednesdays at 7:30pm
Check out the map overleaf for your nearest Life Group. For more
info, speak to New People’s pastors, Matt & Lyndsey Deaville or
email: [email protected]
LANCASHIRE
LANCASHIRE
SWINTON M27
Dave & Sarah Sharpe
SWINTON M27
DaveSWINTON
& Sarah Sharpe
M27
Dean & Hannah Needle
SWINTON M27
Dean & Hannah Needle
WORSLEY M28
Bill & Dawn Moffat
WORSLEY M28
Bill & Dawn Moffat
BROUGHTON GREEN M7
Adam & Rachel Atkins
BROUGHTON GREEN M7
Adam
& Rachel Atkins
HIGHER
BROUGHTON
M7
Dan & Anna Owen
HIGHER BROUGHTON M7
Dan & Anna Owen
SALFORD M7
Matt & Elena Hill
SALFORD M7
Matt
& Elena
Hill
ECCLES
M6
Miriam Pye & Rhys Badkin
ECCLES M6
Miriam Pye & Rhys Badkin
NEW BROUGHTON M7
Frankie Ball,
NEW Hayley
BROUGHTON
M7
Charlton
Frankie
Ball,
& Adam
Shadlow
Hayley Charlton
& Adam Shadlow
IRLAM M44
Dave & Michelle Ralph
IRLAM M44
Dave & Michelle Ralph
WARRINGTON WA3
Catherine Whelan
WARRINGTON
WA3
& Angela Smith
Catherine Whelan
& Angela Smith
STRETFORD M32
Paul & Sarah Chapman
STRETFORD M32
Paul & Sarah Chapman
STRETFORD M32
Elaine Sharp & Jen White
STRETFORD M32
Elaine Sharp & Jen White
SALE M33
Mike & Rosie Braye
SALE M33
Mike & Rosie Braye
OVER 50s
STUDENTS
BLACKBURN
with Darwen
BLACKBURN
with Darwen
BOLTON
BOLTON
BURY
BURY
ROCHDALE
ROCHDALE
WIGAN
WIGAN
REGIONAL
PASTORS:
NORTH
Paul & Zoe
Reid
42
BOLTON NORTH BL2
Dave & Lesley Hardman
BOLTON NORTH BL2
Dave & Lesley Hardman
BURY BL9
Julian & Kathryn Wolstencroft
BURY BL9
Julian & Kathryn Wolstencroft
WHITEFIELD M45
Mark & Michelle Steele
WHITEFIELD M45
Mark & Michelle Steele
HIGHER BLACKLEY M9
Andy & Helen Gerling
HIGHER BLACKLEY M9
Andy & Helen Gerling
BLACKBURN BB5
BOLTON EAST BL2
Mick & Wendy Whittaker
Paul & Zoe Reid
BLACKBURN BB5
BOLTON EAST BL2
Mick & Wendy Whittaker
Paul & Zoe Reid
EAST
Joel & Becky
Weaver
SOUTH
WEST
CENTRAL
Matt & Lyndsey
Deaville
Bill & Dawn
Moffat
Ed Baptist &
Miriam Pye
WARRINGTON
WARRINGTON
STUDENTS
OVER 50s
CALDERDALE
M25
CALDERDALE PRESTWICH
Ian & Catherine Rowbottom
PRESTWICH M25
Ian & Catherine Rowbottom
BRAMALL COURT M3
Morgan Lewis
BRAMALL COURT M3
Morgan Lewis
ADELPHI
CAMPUS M3
Jess Wilson & Lachie Scallion
ADELPHI CAMPUS M3
Jess Wilson
& Lachie
CASTLE
IRWELL
M6 Scallion
Chloe Houston & Ed Price
CASTLE IRWELL M6
Chloe Houston & Ed Price
NEWTON HEATH M40
Andy & Jane Belton
NEWTON HEATH M40
Andy & Jane
Belton
NEWTON
HEATH
M40
Steve & Jen Webster
NEWTON HEATH M40
Steve & Jen Webster
OLDHAM
OLDHAM
SALFORD
SALFORD
MANCHESTER
MANCHESTER TAMESIDE
TAMESIDE
TRAFFORD
TRAFFORD
STOCKPORT
STOCKPORT
CHESHIRE
SALE M33
CHESHIRE
Tony & Wendy Taylor
NEW BROUGHTON M7
SALE M33
Tony & Wendy Taylor Ed Baptist & Caroline Woods
NEW BROUGHTON M7
Ed Baptist & Caroline Woods
HEATON MERSEY SK4
Jo & Dave Fidler
HEATON MERSEY SK4
Jo & Dave Fidler
DIDSBURY M20
Matt & Lyndsey Deaville
DIDSBURY M20
Matt & Lyndsey Deaville
FAILSWORTH M35
Andy & Tracey Black
FAILSWORTH M35
Andy & Tracey
Black
FAILSWORTH
M35
Nina & Jason Corke
FAILSWORTH M35
Nina & Jason Corke
!AUDACIOUS GOLD
Over 50s
!AUDACIOUS
GOLD
Alternate
Wednesdays
Over
50s
11am
- Failsworth
M35
Alternate
Wednesdays
Dave
& Anne
Adams
11am - Failsworth M35
CENTRAL M4 Dave & Anne Adams
Caz Hickley & Sherozina Sharma
CENTRAL M4
Caz Hickley & Sherozina Sharma
STOCKPORT SK3
Hannah & Lucas Lukianow
STOCKPORT SK3
Hannah & Lucas Lukianow
OXFORD ROAD M1
Mike & Jen Tash
OXFORD ROAD M1
Mike & Jen Tash
GOLD
43
JUNE
01
07 - 09
07 - 09
17
18 - 24
20 - 23
Glyn in Glasgow, UK
Glyn at Krakow City Church, Poland
!Audacious Band in Slovakia
!Audacious Band in Hartlepool, UK
Glyn in Germany
!Audacious Band in Portugal
JULY
07
14
17 - 19
19 - 21
24 - 26
28
Glyn at Hillsong London, UK
!Audacious Band in The Wirral, UK
Glyn in Denmark
Glyn at Newcastle Christian Life Centre, UK
Glyn & Sophia at Hillsong Conference Europe, London, UK
!Audacious Academy Graduation
SEPTEMBER
18 - 23 Glyn in Singapore
21
Sophia in Nottingham, UK
23 - 25 Glyn in Germany
AUDACIOUSCHURCH
AUDACIOUSCHURCH
AUDACIOUSCHURCHTV
/AUDACIOUSCHURCH
44
45
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