Buckner International

Transcription

CONTENTS
BUCKNER NEWS
4
PERSPECTIVES ON BUCKNER
Succeeding Success. Buckner President Albert L. Reyes
5
IN OTHER WORDS
Commemorate. Scott Collins
6
BUCKNER JOURNAL
What’s going on at Buckner International
•
Buckner becomes TOMS Shoes giving partner, launches
distribution in Guatemala
•
•
•
Hispanic Baptist Convention, Buckner sign missions covenant
•
•
•
•
2012 special events calendar
Bamboo toothbrushes give kids their smiles back
‘This is home’ – A moving move-in for two Family
Pathways residents
Dillon’s Lunar New Year celebration recap
New foster care and adoption blog at BeaFamily.org
Buckner International, Refuge of Light sign
agreement to help sex trafficking victims
•
•
Children flock to team in DR
•
•
Birthday girl trades gifts for shoes
Calloused hands and full hearts:annual KidsHeart
trip spreads hope in the Valley
Southeast Texas programs receive generous
gifts from local organizations
2 Buckner Today • SPRING 2012 ISSUE
Buckner
TODAY
A publication of Buckner International
Vo l u m e 3 7 , N u m b e r 2 • S p r i n g 2 0 1 2
PR ESI DEN T, B UC KN ER I N TERN ATI ON AL
Albert L. Reyes
PR ESI DEN T, B UC KN ER FOU N DAT I ON
David M. Slover
C EO
Kenneth L. Hall
VI C E PRESI DEN T OF COMMUN I C ATI ON S
Scott Collins
ASSOCIATE VICE PRESIDENT FOR PUBLIC RELATIONS
Russ Dilday
DIRECTOR OF MARKETING AND MEDIA RELATIONS
Jenny Pope
EDI TOR I A L STAFF
Buckner Today revisits some of our favorite stories from past issues
and finds that the hope Buckner shined in their lives years ago still
shines today.
30 Growing up: Family surrounds Brooke Turmes
36 The father of hope, the provider of a future
39 Through the fire: Rebecca Rosengren overcomes
her scars
40 Playing catch up
42 ‘The child that’s going to change our lives forever:’
A first-person perspective from an adoptive family
46 ‘Pure joy:’ Adoptive family of four Russian children
recounts 10-year journey
50 ‘God has touched us:’ Family Place graduate finds
her place in life
53 Old soldiers never die: World War I lives on in
memory of Ed Niedermaier
54 The heart of Juan Pablo
56 Full house: Family of eight fills home with love
58 The queen reigns: Former Rio Grande Valley
Children’s Home resident still paves the way
60 Small-town girl, big-time lawyer
62 Two sisters, six years, one family
64 Two times a blessing
66 Time marches on
43
EDI TOR
Chelsea Quackenbush
A RT DI R EC TOR
Alan Paul
GR A PHI C A RT I ST
Luis Pérez
ELEC TRON I C EDI TOR
Lauren Hollon Sturdy
CON T RI B UTORS
Morris Abernathy
The John Kaufman family
Mike McLean Photo
John Wiggins
EDI TORI A L A SSI STA NT
Tally Leonard
N E WSMEDI A PRODUCT I ON
Nathan Chandler
W EB /MULT I MEDI A MAN AGER
Bradley Vinson
www.buckner.org
E-MA I L
[email protected]
PHON E
214-758-8000
Buckner Today is published by the Public Relations
Office of Buckner International. ©2012 Buckner
Postmaster: Send address changes to Buckner
International Public Relations, 600 N. Pearl,
Suite 2000, Dallas, Texas 75201
LAST LOOK | PARTING SHOT:
‘Follow the leader’
Ken Hall hands over the reins to Buckner International and encourages us
to play ‘follow the leader’ with Dr. Albert Reyes.
SPRING 2012 ISSUE •
Buckner Today 3
PERSPECTIVES ON BUCKNER | ALBERT REYES
Succeeding success
W
hen Ellis Carnett retired as president of Buckner on Jan.15,1963,
That is certainly my testimony as Dr. Hall retires. I want to build on
he became the first president in the history of Buckner to retire.
what he leaves behind and to look for new opportunities of growth
At the time, the ministry was 84 years old.
We have had five leaders in the 133-year history of Buckner. Two
and expansion.
Last fall,we undertook a significant task to help us chart our future
died in office. Now, with Ken Hall’s retirement April 30, the past three
leaders of Buckner will have retired from the office: Dr. Carnett, R.C.
Campbell and Dr. Hall.
About six years ago, the board of trustees began talking to Dr. Hall
about succession planning.They understood that Buckner was a vastly
different and diverse organization in the 21st century and that asking
a person to come in unaware of the ministry and take over as leader
would present insurmountable challenges.
I joined the leadership under Dr.Hall’s watch in 2007 and then was
elected president in 2010. Dr. Hall has continued in his leadership role
as chief executive officer.
It’s important for you to know that background to know how appreciative I am to Dr. Hall and the board for bringing me onto the Buckner
leadership team. I’ve been part of the Buckner family now for five years
and during that time, I’ve gotten to know the ministries, the people and
by rewriting the Buckner mission statement,which dated back to 1963.
the culture – everything from top to bottom. Not since Hal and Joe
An ad hoc committee of our board worked with staff and the result is:
Buckner succeeded their father upon his death in 1919 has a Buckner
Buckner International transforms the lives of vulnerable children, en-
leader had the opportunity to prepare for this post the way I have.
riches the lives of senior adults, and builds strong families through
In her definitive history of Buckner,“Homeward Bound,”written in
1993 and updated in 2009, Karen Bullock gave a title to each presidency of Buckner.
• The Founder: R.C. Buckner
• The Builders: Joe, Hal and Robert Cooke Buckner
Christ-centered values.
We also developed a vision statement: Buckner International will
become a global ministry maximizing resources and leadership to
serve vulnerable children, seniors and families.
The job before us now is to transform those statements into con-
• The Family in Transition: Ellis L. Carnett
crete realities so that lives are changed in a redemptive way for the
• The Extended Family: R.C. Campbell
Kingdom of God.That’s what Buckner has always been about, regard-
• The Global Family: Kenneth L. Hall
less of who serves as president – transforming lives.
When you read the history of Buckner, it strikes you just how rele-
When the time comes that I retire from my leadership role at Buck-
vant each leader was for his particular era and place in time. Each
ner, my hope and prayer is that people will look at this period as a time
leader seized on the opportunities providentially provided to him and
when we set a course based on these mission and vision statements;
the ministry,not to just maintain what he had been given,but to grow
that we stayed true to the course; and that thousands of lives were
Buckner into what we are today.
made better because we acted in faith on our mission and our vision.
It is a solemn reminder to our generation that a building doesn’t
That to me would be the true measure of success.
start with the top floor, but with a strong foundation. Each generation
and period of Buckner has grown out of and on top of what has gone
before. After 133 years of ministry, we have the advantage of seeing
this growth in the rearview mirror of history. I’m confident that if we
had the opportunity to sit down with each past president,he would tell
you his leadership was predicated on the work of his predecessor.
Albert Reyes, President, Buckner International
Visit my blog at www.pandulce.typepad.com
IN OTHER WORDS | SCOTT COLLINS
buckner.org
The only place to read the stories behind the stories.
Commemorate
It’s as old as Genesis, this need we have to commemorate milestones. In the Bible, the commemorations
were sometimes as simple as piling a few stones on top
FEATURED VIDEO
of each other to remember an event.
Monuments have grown in their scope and sophistication as humanity has progressed. Today, we mark
special occasions with everything from elaborate
buildings to three-day weekends.
Christians are quick to give the glory to God,“great
things He has done.” But we also need to scratch the
itch to recognize each other for good work and faithful
service. That can create a tension sometimes. Take for
example this issue of Buckner Today.
With Ken Hall’s retirement after 18 years, we wanted
to recognize him and the work he has done at Buckner.
We are a different organization today than when he became the leader. But how do we recognize one man’s
Growing up: Family surrounds
Brooke Turmes
Adoptive parents knew from the moment they saw her that she would be theirs
and she would touch not only their lives, but the lives of her five adopted siblings
as well. Watch the video now at buckner.org.
work without glorifying him? Ken would never want
that. He’d be embarrassed.
So here it is.This issue of Buckner Today profiles Ken
and the work accomplished these past 18 years (see
page 18). But a better tribute is the section we’ve called
‘Hope Still Shines.’ We looked through past issues of
Buckner Today and selected people we wanted to catch
up with. These are people whose lives were impacted
by Buckner during Ken’s tenure.
It was said of R.C. Buckner that the greatest tribute
to him was not the institution he founded, but the thou-
Focus on health
Calling all doctors,dentists and nurses:Go on
a medical missiont trip with Buckner!
buckner.org/enews/index.php/2011/11/
medical-missions-2012/
Facebook.com/bucknerinternational
Facebook.com/shoesfororphansouls
Facebook.com/gobedo
Twitter: @buckner_intl
Keep your Faith in Focus
sands of children who grew into adulthood and whose
Sign up at buckner.org for our weekly
devotional e-mail, Faith Focus, written
by staff, volunteers and friends
designed to keep your faith in focus
for 2012.
lives stood as a monument to the work Buckner did.
This special issue of Buckner Today is our attempt
to recognize the accomplishments under Ken Hall’s
leadership, while at the same time keeping the focus
on God’s redemptive work in the lives of people whose
lives shine with hope because God used Buckner – and
Letter to the Editor
If you have any
questions or
comments about
the articles
you’ve read in
Buckner Today,
e-mail us at
[email protected].
Ken Hall.
Scott Collins is Vice President of Communications
at Buckner International.
Buckner Today 5
Buckner becomes TOMS shoes giving partner,
launches distribution in Guatemala
SAN JOSE PINULA, Guatemala – Buckner International held a
Buckner Guatemala.
TOMS Shoes distribution to children at the Buckner Community
“It’s important to emphasize that TOMS’commitment to the chil-
Transformation Center March 22. It was the first-ever distribution of
dren in these communities is not a one-time giving opportunity, but
shoes by Buckner through TOMS’internationally-recognized One for
a commitment to continue to provide access to shoes as children
One™ model.
age up — and out — of their shoes.”
Matt Asato, Buckner International’s director of humanitarian aid,
“Sustainable and responsible giving is integral to TOMS giving
said the CTC distribution, held in conjunction with Buckner
philosophy,” said Sebastian Fries, chief giving officer for TOMS.“We
Guatemala, will provide “health and opportunity” for area children.
work to establish long-term partnerships with humanitarian organ-
“This will mean so much for the children of San Jose Pinula,” he
izations, like Buckner, that can provide shoes to children as a critical
said.“New TOMS Shoes will help children maintain their health and
component of their health,education and community development
pursue the opportunity a new pair of shoes offers them, such as
programs. This allows TOMS Shoes to have a greater impact on the
going to school.”
health and well-being of children and their communities.”
Roberto Tejada, Buckner Guatemala’s CTC director, agreed.“Because Buckner is now a TOMS Giving Partner,this gift of shoes means
About the TOMS One for One™ model: With every pair purchased,
we have a partner that understands how meeting the physical needs
TOMS will give a new pair of new shoes to a child in need. To date,
of children is so important to the population we serve.This is not just
TOMS has given more than two million pairs of new shoes to chil-
a distribution of shoes.This is a distribution of hope.”
dren in need around the world. TOMS’ Giving Partners are made up
According to Asato, the San Jose Pinula distribution is part of an
initial shipment of shoes by TOMS to Buckner Guatemala,“and the
first of an ongoing series of shoe distributions to children served by
of humanitarian organizations already established and working in
the countries in which TOMS gives. www.toms.com
– Russ Dilday
Hispanic Baptist Convention,Buckner sign
missions covenant
DALLAS – Leaders of the Hispanic Baptist Convention of Texas and
Rincones,who also serves as pastor of Alliance Church in Lubbock,
Buckner International met Jan. 12 at the Buckner ministry offices to
Texas, said the agreement is significant to the convention because of
sign an agreement that both groups say will help facilitate missions
“the rich experience and resources Buckner brings to our congrega-
enrichment programs and services for the Hispanic Christian
tions.”
community. Jesse Rincones, president of the 1,100-congregation
“For many years,Hispanic congregations have been the recipients
HBCT, co-signed the “Missions Covenant” document with Buckner
of Baptist missions efforts,” he said.“Now we’re seeing a change in
President Albert L. Reyes.
mindset and we’re looking at ourselves as collaborators and initiators
The covenant offers added opportunities for convention members
of mission efforts. The training and the opportunities we’ll receive in
to participate in volunteer missions service and seeks to enhance the
this collaboration are going to allow our congregations to speed up
work of Buckner’s Shoes for Orphan Souls humanitarian aid drive.
the process in being missions initiators.”
Reyes said the covenant will give Buckner “a more intentional and
Rolando Rodriguez,director of Hispanic work for the Baptist General
deliberate focus on the importance of the local church and on our
Convention of Texas, agreed.“It’s a new day for Convención, a brand
mission.This will connect us not just to churches, but churches with a
new opportunity. For many years, Hispanic churches have been
common Hispanic background,language and culture.There are many
considered a mission field – now they’ve become a missions force.”
things we’ll do to tap that background in countries and areas with
– Russ Dilday
similar cultures.”
From left: Sergio Ramos, director of expansion and development for Buckner Foundation; JoAnn Cole, vice president of Buckner Children and Family Services; Dr. Albert Reyes, president of Buckner International; Jesse Rincones, president of Hispanic
Baptist Convention of Texas; Rolando Rodriguez, director of Hispanic work for the Baptist General Convention of Texas; and
Felipe Garza, Buckner vice president of growth and development.
Buckner Today 7
t started as a simple tooth-brushing demonstration for a group of
I
children in Guatemala on a Buckner mission trip in 2010.
With no sinks or running water, Eric Cope held the trash bag for
kids to spit in.It became very apparent how serious their dental issues
were.They didn’t have toothbrushes; their teeth were rotting.
At that moment,Eric was struck by how preventable their diseases
were. He calls that moment ‘the spark to light a flame.’
Sustainable smiles
Eric said that as they started research, the statistics on plastic
toothbrushes horrified them.
“Around 50 million pounds of toothbrushes are clogging up landfills
in the United States each year,” he said.“I got a mental picture in my
mind of the dumps in Guatemala and I knew that was something we
didn’t want to contribute to.”
After traveling to Guatemala several times – to adopt a child and
The Copes, neither of whom have a background in dentistry,
to serve on mission trips – Eric and his wife, Geri, formed Smile
discovered bamboo toothbrushes. The biodegradable bamboo ap-
Squared, a for-profit company with a giving component that sends
pealed to their desire to be eco-conscious.Bamboo is grass,not wood;
bamboo toothbrushes to children around the globe who can’t afford
it’s harvested in a sustainable way and is a renewable resource. The
them. As of March 2012, they’ve given about 7,450 toothbrushes.
toothbrushes are biodegradable, and the bristles and packaging are
Their business model is a one-for-one, meaning that for every
toothbrush purchased through their company, they donate a toothbrush to a child in need.
recyclable. The Smile Squared toothbrushes look like a basic, classic
toothbrush, but they’re better for the environment.
Overcoming obstacles
‘this is why we do this.’
The Copes ran into a huge problem with their supplier in China.
After the first shipment was sent to the U.S., they received a discouraging phone call – their shipment would not be allowed into the
country due to customs laws.
“It was a divine appointment that we would have received those
pictures of the distribution at the dental clinic at that time.”
They found a legitimate supplier
and Eric went to China to sign
They went back and forth with the U.S. government until finally
a contract and make sure
they called Buckner and asked if they could have them shipped di-
the facilities were ethical
rectly to Mexico. And Buckner agreed.
and safe.
Negotiating contracts proved to be a huge roadblock in the pursuit of their goal.
Smile Squared is working
with other organizations besides
“It was extremely discouraging at times,” Geri said.“At one point,
Buckner and partners with dentists and
we got really bad news, bad feedback from two consultants – one of
churches throughout the country. They are having
whom was a retired marketing executive with a St. Louis-based For-
conversations with national retailers to sell Smile
tune 500 company, who
thought the business model
Squared toothbrushes.
They also plan to give toothbrushes to vulnerable kids in the U.S.
and idea were terrible. He
“The contribution of Smile Squared toothbrushes to Buckner Mex-
said that the only“green”any-
ico has been a huge blessing to our Buckner programs, as well as to
one was interested in was the
alliances that we have with government and private orphanages,”
green in their wallet … And
Shores said.“The toothbrushes have enabled us to provide children
then two days later, Dexton
with a new toothbrush every time we have a dental hygiene class. It’s
Shores (regional director of
amazing how a new toothbrush can bring a smile to a child’s face.For
Buckner ministries in Mexico, Peru and the Dominican Republic) sent
photos of children getting their toothbrushes and it reignited that
some, it was the first toothbrush they ever owned.”
– Chelsea Quackenbush
Orphans, vulnerable children and their families are in desperate need of
love, hope – and someone to be their voice.
Your monthly support through Voice Partners provides on-going care and
hope to orphans and vulnerable children through Buckner International. As a
Voice Partner, your gifts have a consistent impact on their lives. Partnering
together, we make it possible for their voices to be heard every day.
Join today. Go to www.Buckner.org/VoicePartners to set up your monthly
commitment using a credit card or direct debit. Your online monthly contribution
will provide significant impact on children in need.
PARTNERS
SPRING 2012 ISSUE • Buckner Today
9
It was hard for her to contain the emotion in her voice. Taking a
deep breath, she let it all sink in. She was in a safe place. She had the
support she needed. She was going to reach her goals.
A few doors down, Monica Martinez let out a sigh and an exclamation with each new household item she unwrapped.
“Can you believe this? All new towels!”she said.“We used to have
just one that we shared. I had to wash it all the time.”
Admiring the washer and dryer,the remote-controlled living room
ceiling fan and the soft new mattresses on the beds, she said, “I
thought only Oprah did things like this!”
Acosta and Martinez were homeless before they moved into two
of the brand-new apartments at Buckner Family Pathways in Dallas
Jan.18.There was excitement,gratitude and hope in their voices.They
were starting fresh.Their world was all possibilities now.
Acosta was referred by The Family Place shelter, the largest family
violence service provider in the Dallas area. She stayed there for
several months after fleeing a bad relationship in California.
She is studying youth counseling at El Centro College, and she
hopes to work with children and mothers who have been through
domestic violence and drug issues.“Stuff I can relate to,”she said. She
has the physical scars to prove it.
Martinez’homelessness couldn’t be attributed to one big problem.
It was just life – a lot of smaller things that added up to a flood. Life
was pulling her under, and she couldn’t keep her head above water
without help.
She and her daughter had drifted from place to place.When a lady
at church heard about their plight, she took Martinez and her 5-yearold daughter in. They slept in her living room until Martinez found
2012 Buckner
Events Calendar
April 28
10th Annual Frost Bank Sporting Clays Challenge
Dallas Gun Club, Lewisville,TX
June 4
Baptist Retirement Community Golf Tournament
San Angelo,TX
Family Pathways.
June 9-16
Shoes for Orphan Souls mission trip to Guatemala
July 6-14 • SOS trip to Peru
July 12-14
13th Annual Texas Bank and Trust Sporting Clays Challenge
Longview,TX
July 15-22 • SOS trip to Dominican Republic
Aug. 5-9
Mother/Daughter trip to Tegucigalpa, Honduras
Now she is studying mass communication and journalism. She
dreams of using technology to take the word of God to people in
remote areas of the world.
“That is my ultimate dream for now,” she said.“Who knows? God
might give me a bigger one.”
The Winborns, a family whose financial gifts support Family Pathways, were there to help the women move in and to pray over them
as they started their journey.
“I think that Family Pathways is a gorgeous program,”said Donna
Winborn.“I truly believe it is exactly how God would have us to help
and uplift these young mothers. I’m just impressed with the way this
program is valuing these ladies’ lives.”
!
– Lauren Hollon Sturdy
Aug. 11-18 • SOS trip to Mexico
Sept. 8
Run for the Children (Dillon International)
Tulsa, OK
Sept. 8-15 • SOS trip to San Pedro Sula, Honduras
Sept. 10 • Buckner Golf Classic, Midland,TX
Sept. 17 • Sewell Golf Classic, Dallas,TX
Sept. 28 • Chevron Phillips Golf Tournament
Beaumont,TX
Oct. 6
Barefoot Run benefiting Shoes for Orphan Souls
Coppell,TX
To support Buckner Family Pathways or other Buckner
family transition programs in Texas, please call Buckner
Foundation at 214-758-8050.
For more information about how to get
involved with Buckner events, please visit
www.bucknerevents.org or email
[email protected]. To go on a mission
trip with Buckner visit ItsYourMission.com
or call 1-877-7ORPHAN
Buckner Today 11
TULSA, Okla. – About 350 people attended the annual Lunar New Year celebration
on Jan. 29, the annual fundraising event which showcased traditional Asian culture,
food and dancing for Dillon International supporters and adoptive families.
The event coincided with the 40th anniversary of Dillon adoptions.
TOP PHOTO:
The opening processional of a huge balloon and paper mache dragon
delighted guests.
MIDDLE PHOTO:
Shawna Sanchez enjoyed getting to know Deniese and Jerry
Dillon, founders of Dillon International, along with the other
40th anniversary guests.
BOTTOM PHOTO:
Di Dim Tom, a traditional Korean performance group,
wowed guests with their colorful fan dance.
DALLAS – We’re excited to announce the start
of a new series on the Be a Family blog called
“Weekly Updates from the Experts.” The series
will cover all things adoption and foster care,
featuring topics such as transracial adoption,
child abuse prevention, questions parents
should ask, book reviews and more, making the
Be a Family blog a resource-rich place for potential foster and adoptive families to go and
learn. Find it now at stories.beafamily.org.
– Buckner staff report
Buckner International,Refuge of Light sign
agreement to help sex trafficking victims
DALLAS – Buckner International and Refuge of Light signed a threeyear agreement Feb.8 to work jointly serving female minors identified
as victims of sex trafficking.
Refuge of Light, based in Tyler, Texas, hopes to start construction
for the ‘safe home’ early in 2013 to serve girls 17 years and under.
Buckner will oversee the operations and provide staff members
to work with Refuge of Light. Buckner staff also will assist in case
management and therapy.
Refuge of Light,which formed in 2010,is dedicated to establishing
a long-term safe home that provides physical, mental and spiritual
healing in an effort to overcome the brutalization of modern day slavery,
or sex trafficking, in the lives of victimized girls in the United States.
“The beauty of this agreement is that it allows both ministries to
work together to fulfill the core values of our separate missions,”said
Felipe Garza,vice president for expansion and development for Buckner. “We are committed to being the presence of Christ for the most
vulnerable in our world and no person is more vulnerable than a
young female who is victimized by the sex trade.”
According to officials at Refuge of Light, human trafficking is the
second largest and fastest growing criminal activity in the world.
victims. The majority of the victims are young girls who have fallen
prey to the commercial sex industry at the hands of perpetrators,
according to reports from the U.S. government.
Human trafficking or slavery generates $32 billion annually world-
Refuge of Light is dedicated to the redemptive rescue and restora-
wide. Statistics show that within the U.S., there are 100,000 to 300,000
tion of domestic minor sex-trafficked girls through advocacy,
individuals trafficked annually,and only a handful of shelters for those
awareness and holistic care.
Buckner Today 13
Children flock to team in DR
ozens of children were waiting at the Community Transformation
D
about Jesus feeding the 5,000—an appropriate metaphor.
Republic when Wilshire Baptist Church volunteers arrived
a Bible story each day.They also brought craft projects, led in singing,
Center in the Pedro Brand district of Santo Domingo, Dominican
The team brought costumes to help the children learn and act out
on a Monday morning in early February. More than
memory verse recitation and recreation. They took photo-
100 children showed up that morning, followed by
graphs of each child —a rarity for poor children—and
another 100 for the afternoon session.
Thirteen Dallas volunteers led a three-day Bible
school for children at the CTC.There were
two sessions each day with a program
for women sandwiched between.
let the kids decorate their frames.
“The children were thrilled to have a photo to
take home,” said trip participant and Buckner staff
member Jerilynn Armstrong.
Wilshire Baptist Church helps fund the CTC
The group led the same program at a
and other ministries in the Dominican Republic
second CTC location later in their trip.
as a signature part of its international missions
Each day, children seemed to
program.The women volunteers treasured the
come from nowhere, and they kept
unique opportunity to work with 35 to 40
coming until the space was over-
women each afternoon.
flowing. One day,the Bible story was
“As a mom with more material goods
than I can ever use, I was truly humbled,” said Abbey Adcox. “The
“We often refer to experiences as being ‘life-changing,’” she said.
women we met in the Dominican Republic were warm, gracious and
“I certainly feel like this experience was‘spirit-changing’for me.I have
filled with joy.Their spirit was a powerful reminder to me to be anxious
longed to participate in a Wilshire mission trip for years and it
for nothing and to really examine what my priorities are.”
exceeded my every expectation in so many ways.”
Christie McFarland and Armstrong taught the women how to knit.
“All the volunteers from Wilshire Baptist Church led the women
Wilshire members donated more than 40 bamboo needles. The vol-
and children with smiles on their faces and joy in their hearts,”said Dex-
unteers showed them how to make wash cloths.
ton Shores,a regional director of Buckner Latin America ministries.“The
“At the end of the day, we were not sure if anyone learned how to
impact their Bible studies had on the children is immeasurable.And the
knit,” Armstrong said.“But as we drove off, we saw women on their
knitting skills they taught the women will pay huge dividends – it will
stoops knitting with their friends.On Wednesday,we left all our knitting
help them provide for their families and give them a sense of purpose.”
supplies and instructions for the Buckner staff to continue this project.”
At the end of the trip, Adcox talked about the biggest change she
experienced.
To learn more about Buckner short-term mission trips, please
visit www.itsyourmission.com.
Volunteers spent their spring break serving
families in the colonias of the Rio Grande Valley
by painting and building new homes, holding
programs for children and women and providing
free haircuts. KidsHeart is an annual missions
effort made possible by a collaboration between
Buckner, Cooperative Baptist Fellowship
of Texas and Literacy Connexus.
Buckner Today 15
Birthday girl trades gifts for shoes
STAPLETON, Ala. – Haven Godwin is a dancer, a gymnast, a swimmer
“When people heard about her goal, everybody wanted to con-
and a cyclist. She’s also a budding philanthropist who decided to
tribute,” Mary said.“Even our pest control man – when he came to
forego gifts for her seventh birthday this year to collect shoes for or-
spray the house he saw the pile of shoes in the floor and asked about
phans and vulnerable children.
it and wanted to help.”
With the help of her mother, Mary, Haven typed a letter about her
Haven’s birthday party was March 4, complete with an “orphan-
birthday wish, made copies and took it to school and church to pass
age cake” she designed herself, frosted with barefoot children and a
out to all her friends:
giant shoe. She collected between 300 and 320 pairs of shoes by the
Hello.My name is Haven Godwin.I am 6 years old.I want my birthday wish
to come true.Please send a new pair of shoes so that I can collect them and
send them to the orphanage.These kids only get one pair of shoes a year.
That is my wish for my birthday instead of presents
end of her drive. Though she was happy to have met her goal, she’s
looking forward to the next project.
“Now that we’ve done shoes, next year is toys, and then clothes,
and then money to buy food,”she said. She said eventually she’d like to
go on a mission trip to deliver shoes and visit the children in person.
for myself, because I have everything that I want—
– Lauren Hollon Sturdy
my family and the toys I already have. I would like
to collect at least 300 pairs of NEW shoes for the
kids.My seventh birthday is March 4 so that is the
deadline to turn in shoes. Please ask your
Learn more about the
Shoes for Orphan Souls Birthday Club at:
shoesfororphansouls.org/birthdayclub.shtml
parents to send in a new pair of shoes by
this date.
Love,
Haven Godwin
Southeast Texas programs receive generous gifts from local organizations
HOUSTON – Buckner programs in Southeast Texas received two
hopes to grow the pro-
generous grants from the Houston Endowment and the Beau-
gram to 12 families by the
mont Foundation to be used for local ministries and programs.
end of 2012.
The Houston Endowment gave a $225,000 grant to be used
Family Place is a self-suf-
at Buckner Family Place in Houston over the next three years.The
ficiency program that
Beaumont Foundation presented a $66,000 check to Buckner
provides housing and
Children and Family Services.Buckner will receive $132,000 total
supportive services for
in 2012 from the Beaumont Foundation,a long-time supporter of
Buckner ministries and community programs.
“We are humbled by the generosity of the Houston Endow-
Laura May, Buckner Beaumont
administrator and Frank
Newton, president and CEO of
Beaumont Foundation.
ment and the Beaumont Foundation,” Buckner Foundation
single-parent families in a
safe environment while
completing their educational or vocational goals.
President David Slover said.“The impact the gift will have on sin-
Buckner will use the Beaumont Foundation grant exclusively
gle-parent families in Southeast Texas will pay dividends in the
to provide school clothing for children in their care – foster care,
future.Not only are the parents’lives changing, but the children’s
group residential/foster care and emergency shelter and assess-
are as well.”
ment programs across Texas. In 2012, Buckner staff anticipate a
The Buckner Family Place Houston program started in July
2011. There are eight families enrolled in the program. Buckner
minimum of 440 children qualifying for the $300 clothing
stipend per child.
– Chelsea Quackenbush
Buckner Today 17
Buckner Today 19
Photo credit: Mike McLean, mcleanphoto.com
Ken Hall can barely make it
through the story. His eyes grow
red as tears well up inside them.
His voice is choked. There are
pauses – those kinds of stops in
the conversation that are almost
uncomfortable. He looks down
at his clenched hands and crossed
feet and shuffles in the chair.
The story is simple in itself.
No lightning bolts from the sky.
No baritone voices bellowing
instructions. In fact, its simplicity
is what makes it profound
and helps you understand
the man telling it.
Story by Scott Collins
It
was a beautiful fall day. One of those you take a picture
of and put on a calendar. Perfect temperature. No
wind. Brilliant sunshine. Not a day to spend in an office.
But that’s exactly where Hall had spent his day, poring over financial spreadsheets and trying to extract
every ounce of information from the numbers. He was looking for
something; he just wasn’t sure what. Finally, exhausted and exasperated, he gave up and went for a walk.
“I got up and walked around the old Dallas children’s home
campus,” he recalls. “I remember it very well. It was the fall of
1995 and I just walked around the campus and went to some of
the dorms we had where the children lived at that time.”
The stroll took him to the children’s medical building on the campus at the time. “As I was walking into the building, this child was
coming out and I began to engage him in a conversation. He had
just been told that he was going to be reunified with his family.”
The boy’s excitement and happiness told Hall all he needed to
know – about the financial structure of Buckner as well as the philosophy going forward.
“I don’t know the outcome of what happened [with the boy], if
it was a successful reunification or not. I don’t know the end result
of that. But it was that afternoon – that young man’s excitement
about being with a family – that the realization and the conviction
in my soul came that I’ll fight for whatever it takes for Buckner to
move away from the institutional model of childcare, as well-intentioned as it was, but I would use all of my influence and clout
and gather the resources to build a new model that every child
could have a family experience; a home-like family experience.”
Maybe it was that experience with the young man that influenced Hall to turn Buckner toward less of an institutional model of
care. But his understanding about home and family goes back
much further, to his self-described “Beaver Cleaver” upbringing.
“I was so blessed to have grown up with a wonderful, godly
family. My parents were very engaged in my life on a personal
basis. I mean, Dad was my Little League coach. So my parents
were the friends of my friends’ parents. It was a great life. I had a
church that loved Jesus and that taught me about missions. You
know, I dated the girls who were active in the church.”
Buckner Today 21
And while H.L. and Chloe Hall taught Ken about family, the
have thought of them; I have thought of my parents.”
lessons didn’t end at the family’s front door. Today, reflecting on the
It’s not hard to connect the dots between his family’s unconditional
“cataclysmic,” turbulent time and place of the 1950s and 60s in
love for him and decisions Hall has made that affect Buckner and
Louisiana, Hall knows his mom and dad “taught me the value of
thousands of children, families and elders served by the organization.
people in the midst of the civil rights crisis. My parents were on the
“I think it’s a basic human right that every person deserves to
right side of that issue and believed in justice for all people and
know that they can be loved unconditionally by a family. If you
“Because of the way I was
brought up, because of my
understanding of Jesus and how
He lived His life, my hope is, just as
the founder of Buckner, when he
breathed his last breath on earth,
all he owned was a cemetery plot
and a legacy. That’s what I pray
for me – that when God calls me
home, I will have spent all of the
resources he gave me financially,
emotionally, relationally; I will
have spent it all to make life better
for the people God gave me the
privilege to serve.”
taught me that.”
learn that, as I did as a child growing up – that I was loved un-
That influence is like a warm blanket he has gone back to con-
conditionally by a mother and a father – that’s how I found Jesus.
stantly since being elected president and chief executive officer of
“The best way for us to bring people into the kingdom is to give
Buckner in the fall of 1993.
“I think the best way I could describe what my parents did for
me is they loved me unconditionally. As a father, a husband, a
pastor and president of Buckner, everything I have ever done, I
them a home with a godly mom and a godly father if at all possible, so that that child can discover what it means to be loved
completely and unconditionally.”
That emphasis on family instead of institutions started taking
SPRING 2012 ISSUE • Buckner Today
23
deep roots in the late 1990s and is still the greatest influence on
time, governments worldwide saw in Buckner a sleeping giant now
Buckner a decade and a half later. What it meant then and still
awake to the needs of children beyond Texas. Everything changed
today is that the organization would focus more on people than
overnight.
buildings. It’s what Hall now calls “the most strategic decision we
Since then, concern for orphans has become almost a cliché for
made, which would impact everything we did globally; To make
every celebrity and musician, both Christian and secular. New organ-
the decision to move away from emphasizing a specific location
izations have sprouted in the United States as the cause of the fatherless
with specific buildings to realize that we’re a movement for Christ,
has become a cause du jour. Advocacy has risen to new heights.
impacting the lives of children and that it’s not about buildings, it’s
But throughout all the newfound hype, Ken Hall has worked to
not about brick and mortar.”
insure that Buckner utilizes its unique position of actually doing
It’s that line of thought – that Buckner is a movement – that set
good, not just advocating it. To that end, Buckner has become a
the ministry on a course beyond the bounds and borders of Texas,
major exporter of tools and techniques for countries around the
where it had resided safely since 1879. Today, every part of the or-
world, enabling and empowering them. Buckner-affiliated non-
ganization has been changed by the decision in 1995-96 to jump
government organizations (NGOs) don’t just sponsor orphans.
into global childcare. It even led to the need for a new name, from
They actually find homes for them, from foster families to transition
the 1960s Buckner Baptist Benevolences, to Buckner International.
homes. It’s that knowledge of actually having provided childcare
Once the toothpaste was out, there was no going back. When
for 133 years that piques the local governments where Buckner
Hall and others toured Russia, Romania and Poland for the first
works.
Baptist Church there, Hall and a group stood in the middle of a lot
behind the city’s mall and announced the coming of Buckner Westminster Place. Like the plunge into international childcare, the
decision to rapidly change and expand Buckner Retirement Services
came with risks. But like everything else, it also came with conviction.
Himself a Baby Boomer, Hall knew the coming tidal wave of senior
adults in America meant Buckner had to start getting ready.
The dirt had barely been bulldozed in Longview when he turned
his gaze on Houston, where Buckner Baptist Haven had served the
community since 1956. It was an old facility in need of massive
changes to maintain the level of care Buckner was committed to
providing. By 1998, Buckner had sold the Haven property and
moved west to a fast-growing, thriving area of Houston. Parkway Place was born and within 18 months, it was full and
stood as the new model for Buckner Retirement Services.
Calder Woods, a smaller brother of Parkway Place,
opened in Beaumont and in 2011, Buckner opened a new,
modern version of Buckner Villas in Austin. All told, from
1994 through 2011, Buckner has invested more than
$150 million in new construction and improvements to
senior living communities. Add to that the addition of Baptist Memorials Ministries in San Angelo, a sister agency
through the Baptist General Convention of Texas, and BRS has exNow, more than 17 years later, Buckner “International” is almost an afterthought for employees and supporters who know the
organization. But when the decision was first made, Hall admits it
carried some risks. Was it worth it?
ploded over the past 18 years, now caring for more than two and
half times the number of elders.
Ever the visionary, Hall says his dream is that “one day I’ll read
about the first Buckner retirement center in another state in the
“Yes, absolutely,” he says, “because it’s about the end result of
United States. And then my ultimate dream would be to hear about
a life being changed in the name of Jesus. And unless you’re will-
a Buckner retirement community in another country and another
ing to sacrifice everything you have for that one life, you’re never
place in the world.”
going to be able to spend the energy necessary to impact the
With all the fanfare and feting over his retirement April 30, Hall
global perspective. For me, it all goes back to that one experience:
likes to remind his friends, family and co-workers that he’s not dying
that little boy wanted a home.”
– just retiring. But that doesn’t mean he hasn’t thought about his legacy.
The irony of Buckner’s explosion into international childcare
“Because of the way I was brought up, because of my under-
has been the growth of the ministry’s retirement side since 1994.
standing of Jesus and how He lived His life, my hope is, just as the
Lost in the furor over international work, Buckner Retirement Serv-
founder of Buckner, when he breathed his last breath on earth, all
ices has taken a dramatic upward climb, so much so that in 2011,
he owned was a cemetery plot and a legacy. That’s what I pray for
it became the largest non-profit retirement provider in Texas when
me – that when God calls me home, I will have spent all of the
measured by the number of living units it offers.
resources he gave me financially, emotionally, relationally; I will
It started in Longview within six months of Hall taking over the
reins of Buckner. Fulfilling a promise from his days as pastor of First
have spent it all to make life better for the people God gave me the
privilege to serve.” ■
Buckner Today 25
As president, pastor, father and husband, words
have always been an important part of Ken
Hall’s life. His insight will continue to impact the
people he led far after his retirement.
On Buckner:
“I have become a part of this Buckner movement for Christ
that goes back long before I ever breathed air on the earth.
But it’s who I am now. It’s in my DNA. I love Buckner because I know what it does. I love Buckner because I know
what it’s been. And I love Buckner because I know what it
can be and the opportunities that lie before us as we seek
to touch a world for Christ with hands-on ministry.”
Help children while honoring Ken and Linda’s service
Ken Hall has approached his ministry with a genuine passion
and a call from Christ to serve “the least of these.” And he’s
engaged that call with the loving support of his wife, Linda.
When Ken announced his retirement as CEO, the Buckner
International Board of Trustees established the Ken and Linda
On God’s Hand:
“There are days you wonder if you can keep going. But if
you just keep walking and not fainting; if you keep running
and trying not to get too weary or soar with the eagles,
whatever it might be, if you just keep going, the Lord
renews your strength. He gives you another day, another
opportunity, another acquaintance and you see His hand
and you feel His presence and you know His purpose.”
Hall Fund for Global Ministry to honor the pair for their years
of service and commitment. Now you can join the Buckner
board to honor the Halls and support their vision to sustain and
expand Buckner services to vulnerable children and families
around the world. The fund will provide operating support, in
perpetuity, to the life-impacting Buckner programs.
Please consider making a financial contribution to honor
Ken and Linda. You may give at: buckner.org/kenhallfund or
Buckner Foundation
600 N. Pearl St., Suite 2260
Dallas, TX 75201
Please indicate “Honoring Ken and Linda Hall” in the memo
line of your check. If you have any questions about the fund
or giving options, please contact Whitney Landers at Buckner
Foundation at 214-758-8043 or [email protected].
Photo credit: Mike McLean, mcleanphoto.com
mail your contribution to:
On Sacrifice:
“It’s about the end result of a life being changed in the
name of Jesus. And unless you’re willing to sacrifice everything you have for that one life, you’re never going to be
able to spend the energy necessary to impact the overall
global perspective.”
On Going International:
“It wasn’t rocket science. It wasn’t some great, grand
strategy. It was just that there are children living in
orphanages that need us. Let’s go serve them.”
“I have to be very honest to say that as the leader of the
organization, one of the hardest decisions you have to
make is not to go somewhere. It’s deciding not to go.
When you see that opportunity and you know that the
ministries of Buckner can impact that situation and
having to balance all the factors of Buckner and to
say, we can’t go there. That’s been one of the great
burdens of my heart and my soul is to know how
to grow, how to expand our services in a manner
in which God would want us to do it, but also
recognizing that there are limited resources that
we have, knowing that God has no limit and we
are His instruments.”
On Legacy:
“If I have one legacy [that] I hope is left behind,
it’s that we were willing to let certain
sacred cows die. We might have killed a
few of them. Some of them we just didn’t
feed anymore and they went away.”
“I think great leaders have to know when
to stop as well as to know when to act.”
“I think the greatest stewardship that I could
offer this ministry is to make it very clear that it’s
not about who the leader is. It’s what the ministry is.”
“If you really want to know how I want to be remembered, it’s as a steward; faithful that He who entrusted
me with this, whatever it is, I did it well. You know, I
did it to the best of my abilities.”
“When people think of me, I want them to think of me
as a relational person, kind, generous with my time,
generous with my resources, my compassion and that I
was never surface; that I genuinely cared about their lives.”
On Leaving:
“My greatest act for Buckner at this point in history is
to allow other people to lead and to move from being
the leader to being an effective follower. I’m going to be just
as busy for Buckner as I have been when I was receiving a
paycheck. I’m going to continue being a donor to Buckner.
I believe it’s the best investment you can make with your money.”
Buckner Today 27
Buckner Today 29
Wanda Turmes and her
daughter, 4-year-old Brooke,
kiss goodnight in their first
appearance in Buckner Today
in spring 2001.
Buckner Today 31
Mother and daughter recreate
the iconic photograph. Now
Brooke is 13, thriving in school
and at home.
“God has been in control,” said
Victor Turmes. “I mean, you can
see His hand in it. It hasn’t been
easy, but it’s been good. And I
don’t think it would have
been this good and
these many good
things would
have happened
if God hadn’t
been in it.”
Buckner Today 33
laques, signs and knick knacks adorn Wanda and Victor
P
11.They may be the only couple in America excited about taking de-
Turmes’ home in rural Kountze, Texas. Not too many, but
fensive driving together.“It means we get to have a date,”Wanda said.
enough to remind visitors that a mother’s touch decorated
“When Victor and I realized we couldn’t have kids, we gave that
the house. They also serve as a reminder that while Mom was the
area of life over to God,” Wanda said. “We surrendered that whole area
decorator, God built the home.
of children over to the Lord and said,‘You bring into this home what
On a wall near the front door hangs this sign: “These are the
You want.’We’ve had three phone calls and we’ve had three adoptions.
children God has given me.God has been good to me”(Genesis 33:5).
Out of that, we now have six children. So we’ve never hesitated be-
And over the fireplace: “Having someplace to go is home. Having
someone to love is family. Having both … is a blessing.”
When Brooke Turmes appeared in Buckner Today in the spring of
cause that area of our lives was committed to the Lord.”
Today, Brooke is like other 13-year-olds. She likes sleepovers
with her friends, plays softball and is involved in cheerleading.
2001,her parents knew she was the child
God had given them and that she was a
blessing. But what they didn’t know was
that she was the just beginning.
Since adopting Brooke, who is now
13, Wanda and Victor have added five
other children to their family through
adoption. And if you ask Wanda, they
might not be finished yet.
Regardless of the number of children
But life is not without challenges faced
When Brooke Turmes
appeared in Buckner
Today in the spring of
2001, her parents
knew she was the child
God had given them.
in their home, Wanda and Victor know
Brooke will always be special.
Through most of her birthmother’s pregnancy, there were no
signs that Brooke’s birth would be anything but normal. Her birth-
by anyone with Down syndrome. As a
child, Brooke was often sick. She was diagnosed with an immunodeficiency
disorder. When she started school, she
went to regular classes and developed
friendships with her peers.
Before long, “we began to realize that
the gap developmentally was getting
bigger and so we started pulling her out
of the regular classroom,”Wanda said.
Even with the changes, Victor said they have worked to keep
Brooke involved with friends she developed relationships with. “That
was very important to us, that she maintain those friendships.”
mother decided early to make a plan for adoption. What she didn’t
While Brooke loves her friends, she also brings out the best in her
know – what she couldn’t have known – is that the child would be
siblings. “Having her in our home brings a lot of compassion out in
born with Down syndrome.
everyone else,” Wanda said. “Having her as a sibling or as our daughter
She had already contacted Buckner about placing the baby for
adoption. A family was matched and everything was in place. But
requires a lot of giving, a lot of sacrifice and a lot of patience.”
At the same time, Brooke gives, too.
when the adoptive family discovered the child had Down syndrome,
“I think she brings you outside of yourself because of what she
they decided they were not capable of coping with the extra effort a
gives to you,” Victor added.“Out of everybody, I think she’s the only
special needs child would require.Everyone involved was left in shock
one who really shows total compassion.”
when the diagnosis came.
But the Buckner philosophy of not pressuring anyone involved in
the adoption process enabled everyone to take a pause and reassess
the situation.That’s when Wanda and Victor entered the picture.
Wanda heard about Brooke from a Buckner adoptive mother at a
prayer meeting. “That night, I shared with Victor about Brooke and
Reflecting on the past 13 years,Victor sees God’s hand in their family
and in Brooke’s growth and development.
“God has been in control,” he said.“I mean, you can see His hand
in it. It hasn’t been easy, but it’s been good. And I don’t think it would
have been this good and these many good things would have
happened if God hadn’t been in it.”
for me, it was almost immediately that this was the child we
Whether it’s Brooke or any of her five siblings, Wanda and Victor
had prayed for for two or three years,”Wanda said in Buckner Today
believe their adoptions have taught everyone “that their needs are
in 2001.
met in Christ.Their needs are so great because of what they’ve been
Wanda and Victor knew Brooke would be their daughter the moment they saw her.
On Jan. 6, 1999, just a month after first hearing about Brooke,
Wanda and Victor welcomed their new daughter into their home.
And while Brooke was the first, the Turmes didn’t stop. Brooke’s
siblings now include Brittany,17; Nicole,15; Paige,14; Devin,12; and Ty,
through,” Wanda said. “When they come through the door with their
hurts and feelings of abandonment and insecurities, the uncertainties, not knowing if this home is going to work out or if these parents
are really going to be the ones that last forever. That level of need is
beyond us. So it’s made us rely on God a whole lot more than I think
we would have had we not adopted.” ■
Buckner Today 35
Story and photography by Chelsea Quackenbush
hen a little girl dreams of her future wedding,she thinks of the man who will be waiting
W
at the end of the aisle – her prince charming. Less often, she might think of the man
who will be walking alongside her and giving her away.
Or the man who won’t be there beside her – her father.
She thinks of him with anger, sadness or regret because he won’t be there at her side.
He’s abandoned her. He’s no longer alive. She never knew him in the first place.
Jackie Belt has seen this scenario more times than he can count.It breaks his heart every
time, which is why, more than a dozen times, he has stepped in and walked some very
important young women in his life down the aisle toward their future husband.
The former foster houseparent did it out of the love he has for his former foster
daughters he has met and served through Buckner over the years.
That love and desire to provide for others carries over to everything he does but
especially in his role as the director of client assistance for the Buckner Humanitarian
Aid Crisis Relief Center.
‘WHEN MR. BELT KNOCKS’
Last time we saw Jackie in Buckner Today was the spring 2002 issue.He just
delivered a refrigerator to the Turrubiates family in Waxahachie. The single
mother of eight kids had to go to the store daily to get ice
for the family’s small cooler.
Turrubiates summed up Jackie perfectly in that story:
“When Mr. Belt knocks, good things happen.”
Jackie helped her apply for food stamps and TANF after
her husband left her with nothing. She had no idea
where to turn, but she somehow found Buckner.
A large portion of Jackie’s job – his ministry,really
– remains visiting families and delivering clothing,
appliances and other items.
Buckner Today 37
He provides essentials to meet the daily,immediate needs of fam-
doing the Lord’s work.It’s like that verse in Matthew:‘When I was hun-
ilies but he also provides hope. His favorite verse is Jeremiah 29:11: “‘I
gry you gave me food. When I was thirsty, you gave me drink.’ We’re
know the plans I have for you’declares the Lord.‘Plans to prosper you
called to love our neighbors.”
and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and future.’”
He shares the verse with hundreds of families who walk through
Perhaps the most significant story in his file is one about a little
boy named Corey.
his door.He leads the Buckner humanitarian aid ministry with the wisdom of a father and the eagerness of a child.
‘I SEE GOD EVERY DAY’
It happened several years ago but Jackie remembers it as if it were
LONG-TIME SERVANT
yesterday.
Jackie’s journey to Buckner began in 1979 in San Antonio. He
One day, a 10-year-old boy, Corey, and his mother came to the
helped some people from church move to Dallas to become foster
warehouse to give Buckner his old wheelchair. He was quadriplegic,
houseparents. Soon after, he got a call from someone at Buckner
and had just received a new wheelchair from Easter Seals. Since
about being a houseparent in Dallas. He already had a job at a local
Buckner had helped Corey and his mother before,they wanted to give
university but he and his wife, Bonnie, prayed about it and felt like the
back to someone else, Jackie said.
Lord was leading them to Dallas.
As if they needed more confirmation of their decision, they sold
their house in San Antonio the day after they put it on the market.
He started as the director of residential life and in 1994, took over
client assistance programs.
“Our numbers have gone up since I started,”Jackie said.“We help
a lot of needy families … I’ve seen kids sleeping in cars, moms losing
babies, kids who come in here hungry. But every day, God surprises
us. I see Him work in the most amazing ways.”
Jackie has an endless file of those crazy, God-moment stories.
One woman came to the humanitarian aid center with bandages
all over her hands and body. She had just lost her baby and everything she owned in a house fire. She lost all her money. She couldn’t
afford a burial for her child, let alone furniture,clothing or a new place
to live.
Buckner gave her some money for the funeral services and got
her a place to stay while she got back on her feet.
This past fall,the warehouse staff was unsure of where they would
The wheelchair was fire engine red with all the bells and whistles.
get the winter coats clients desperately needed as cold winter nights
It was comfortable and still in great condition.“Corey” was embroi-
crept in.
dered in gold lettering across the back.
They prayed and prayed. The very next day, a delivery truck with
700 coats showed up.
Another client asked Jackie if they ever received hand tools because he needed some to do a job to make money and feed his family.
Jackie had to turn him away. He’d never seen hand tools donated.
But a few days later, Jackie placed a happy phone call to the man
– they had received hand tools that morning.
An elderly lady asked Jackie for dog food one day. Dog food had
never been donated before. But lo and behold, Jackie was on the
phone the next day,telling her to come pick up the donated dog food.
The list goes on and on.
“We are more blessed than they are,”he said.“That I get to see the
clients, the release of pressure, that sigh … I really like feeling like I’m
Jackie assured the pair that he would give it to a child in desperate need.He parked the wheelchair in the back of the warehouse and
waited for that special call.
A few weeks later,the Buckner school principal called Jackie about
needing a wheelchair for a new little boy at school. He said he had
one and invited her to come check it out.She went to the back by herself and after a few minutes, showed up to Jackie’s office in tears.
“What’s wrong?”Jackie recalled asking her. He thought there was
a problem with the chair.
She shook her head and said nothing was wrong. In fact, the
wheelchair was perfect.
The little boy who needed the chair? His name was Corey. ■
he scars you see will never go away. The ones you don’t see
T
When the time came for Rebecca to leave the hospital, the severity
already have.
of her burns required detailed medical care too serious for her to be
Rebecca Rosengren was a tiny toddler 20 years ago when a raging
placed in a regular foster home. There were two choices: assign Re-
house fire consumed not only her home, but 75 percent of her little
becca to a nursing home or place her in a unique Buckner foster group
body, leaving her burned and near death. Heavy doses of antibiotics
home in Tyler. Buckner got the nod.
saved her life,but took her hearing,leaving her deaf.Scars from dozens
of surgeries cover her arms, legs and part of her head.
Rebecca’s face was all that was visible the first time Sidney Rosengren, a registered nurse,saw her in 1992.Rebecca was Sidney’s patient
in the intensive care unit at Parkland Memorial Hospital in Dallas.
Rebecca spent 192 days in the hospital, surrounded by a jungle
of IV poles and respirator cables. Tubes snaked out of her nose and
mouth.Water saturation had bloated her tiny features.
Sidney remembers looking at the child’s blue eyes and thinking,
“That’s the most beautiful face I have ever seen.”
Her Buckner foster parents, Judy and Stephen Foster, spent months
nursing Rebecca through painful, often gruesome, therapy. That
special care and attention allowed her to heal, both inside and out.
When an agreement with the biological family was reached, the
Fosters were asked if they wanted to adopt Rebecca.The Fosters had
cared for more than 200 foster children, but they only adopted one.
“When I prayed to God for a child, He gave me Stephen Jr.,” Judy
said. “When I prayed and asked for a daughter, He gave me Rebecca.
He just said I couldn’t keep her.”
Sidney and Bret Rosengren became Rebecca’s respite caregivers
Rebecca’s parents, jobless at the time of the fire, stopped visiting
through Buckner until the adoption was finalized in November 1994.
her at the hospital and Sidney poured her heart into Rebecca’s care.
Today, Rebecca has graduated from the Oklahoma School for the
Sidney knew she had to adopt Rebecca.“I just started trying to be
Deaf. She lives in her own apartment in Oklahoma City and is sur-
a mother for her,” Sidney said the first time Rebecca appeared in
rounded by a large group of friends.The vivacious 23-year-old loves to
Buckner Today in 1995.
read, and she loves Facebook,shopping,her two cats and Sidney’s dog.
Sidney asked to be assigned to Rebecca every chance she could.
Eventually,Rebecca wants to work with children in early childhood
She cuddled and rocked her. She painted her nails. She lugged
education,specializing in helping children with developmental needs.
Rebecca in a wagon,respirator and all,around the hospital room.With
“I care a lot when I see people with special needs,”Rebecca signs.
each of the 192 days Rebecca was in the hospital, Sidney grew more
“It makes me feel sorry for them because I understand.I know because
attached to her.
of what I’ve been through. I know what it’s like.” ■
Buckner Today 39
arissa Clanton knew she and her sister had been rescued when
N
drive an old 1981 BMW as her starter car,and helped her purchase the
they were removed from their mother’s custody. She was 14
car she has now.The Hoppers also took Narissa on a two-week family
years old then, and her mother’s lifestyle choices and relationships
vacation to the Caribbean – it was her first vacation ever, and it
had been putting the girls in danger for too long.
sparked a love of travel that she might not have discovered otherwise.
Today, Narissa is funny, confident and candid – she doesn’t sugar-
With the Hoppers, she had a chance to see a healthy marriage, in-
coat anything and isn’t afraid to voice her thoughts. Nothing about
cluding arguments that didn’t end in divorce,abandonment or abuse.
her life has been easy so far,and she acknowledges the effects trauma
She remembered thinking again and again,‘This is how a dad acts?’
has had on her. But she’s worked through it, moved on and realized
as she observed the family dynamics. She also found that she had
that one of the hardest parts of life she’ll probably ever face is behind
some catching up to do.
her now.
“There are a lot of things that fall through the cracks, that people
When Buckner Today last caught up with her in summer 2005,she
in two-parent families, or really families with any parent, take for
was 16 years old and had been living at a Buckner foster group home
granted that they picked up along the way in life,”Narissa said.Things
in Midland for two years.In that Q&A,she talked about her friends,her
like how to do taxes or learning about a 401K. She said she’s still un-
faith and being different.
covering these gaps in knowledge, but when these little things come
Buckner staff in Midland say Narissa has always been an achiever
up, she can always call the Hoppers for answers and advice.
and a hard worker. She worked two part-time jobs throughout high
school – one as a server at a local ice cream shop, and the other at a
children’s museum. Though she was busy, she excelled in every
The next step
opportunity she took,which landed her a membership in the National
She graduated from Midland High School in 2007 and left the
Honor Society. She was active at First Baptist Church of Midland,
Hoppers’ home, terrified and excited.Terrified because she would be
strong in her faith and deeply committed to her friends. She also had
living on her own for the first time, with no real support system to
a strong sense of responsibility and leadership; she saw herself as an
catch her if she fell.Excited because it was a new beginning:her life as
example for the younger kids who lived with her at Buckner.
Narissa, not as a foster youth.
She lived at Buckner for three years before spending her last year
She started at Texas A&M University as an engineering major, but
of high school living with Eric and Misti Hopper, a couple she met
quickly found her niche in psychology. She’s getting minors in anthro-
through her job at the children’s museum.The Hoppers have two chil-
pology and gender studies.
dren: Liz,who is the same age as Narissa, and Jace.Eric and Misti went
At 23 years old,Narissa exudes confidence,intelligence and a sense
through foster certification so that Narissa could live with them, and
of self.She’ll graduate with her bachelor’s degree in May and is looking
when she moved in, they treated her like one of the family.
forward to her next steps.She plans to move to Dallas and start a doc-
The experience of living in a family,even for a brief time,was vitally
toral program in clinical psychology at the University of North Texas
important to Narissa.The Hoppers focused on instilling independence
with the goal of becoming a therapist.She decided that all the terrible
in their children, and they treated Narissa no differently.When Liz and
things she experienced growing up would be a little more OK if she
Narissa were both looking into colleges, they did their own applica-
can help just one person through the knowledge she’s gained.
tions, paid their application fees and arranged their campus visits.Eric
“I kind of feel like at this point, everything that I’ve been through
and Misti were happy to help and answer questions but they made
in my life was for that, was for me to help other people. So it’s re-
sure their kids knew how to navigate life on their own. They let her
freshing to know what I’m meant to do.” ■
Buckner Today 41
A first-person
perspective
from an
adoptive family
In November 2001, John and
Susie Kaufman and their son,
Luke, welcomed the family’s
newest member, Harrison, into
their lives through adoption.
Now, after 10 years, the
Mt. Vernon, Texas, family shares
their long-term perspectives on how
their lives were changed forever
by the miracle of adoption.
Photography by Russ Dilday
Buckner Today 43
{Susie}
{Susie}
When we adopted Harrison we were so ready for another child to
Our journey to adoption really began 20 years ago in Florida.I was
love.We had Luke, our 8-year-old, but we were still lacking something
told it was too dangerous for me to have children because of my ju-
in our family.
I remember the first time I saw him
venile diabetes.The specialist suggested that we adopt if we wanted
to have a family.
in the hospital nursery: He had a
After two years of being on an adoption waiting list,we finally were
cap pulled down over his hair and
told we would receive twin toddlers.The girls were 18 months old.Their
was completely wrapped up to his
father had died shortly after their birth, and their mother was diag-
chin with a blanket. He was awake
nosed with a terminal disease and was given six months to live.
and I stared at him, thinking, ‘Is this
The mother agonized over her children and ultimately decided to
the child that is going to change our
place them for adoption.The mother chose us to be the new parents
lives forever? ‘
of her twins.We were so excited and began preparing their room and
And after three days of holding him while we were in the hospital,
I knew the answer to that question.Yes,he did change me completely.
I knew we would love Harrison but I was totally unprepared for the
amount of happiness and fulfillment he would add to our lives.
our lives for our new family. Everything was ready – the room, the
clothes, the toys – and our hearts.
As we made our final preparations to receive these two beautiful
children, we received a call that floored us: The adoption was not
He was so much fun to watch as he would crawl down the hall with
going to happen. A relative, who previously had decided against tak-
a bucket on his head, or when he went through his climbing stage as
ing the children, changed her mind. Heartbroken, we decided that
he opened the dryer door and climbed up to the top where he threw
maybe this was God telling us to try and conceive a baby.
out handfuls of laundry soap, squealing in delight. I went and got the
We tried and became pregnant immediately. After a few weeks,
camera immediately. I truly enjoyed every stage in his life, and look
we were told that I was pregnant with twins; this was definitely what
forward to our next adventure. Harrison has made us complete.
God intended for us. After several more weeks, I lost one of the babies. We thought, ‘How could this be? We have a team of high-risk
{Luke}
specialists caring for us.’
Being only 8 years old when this whole process began, I really
didn’t understand the responsibility
of adoption. All I knew was I wanted a
little brother and when that fateful
day came and we officially got Harrison, I was blissfully unaware of how
this bundle of joy would completely
rock my world.
Through these last 10 years, I have
grown closer to Harrison than I ever thought possible. I have been
able to watch and help him through every stage in his life. Yes, we
have had our personality conflicts, but I wouldn’t trade any moment
we’ve had together for anything.
See,adoption didn’t just change Harrison’s life,but it also changed
mine.There is no way I can put the feelings I have toward my brother
into words.As I start a new chapter in my life – going to college – I will
miss him immensely.
So this is for you,Harrison: “Even though I may be far off,I want you
to know I love and care for you more than you’ll ever know. And in
times of trouble, don’t look toward man for help; instead, look toward
the heavens and toward your God.”
“
Harrison is a shy, loving individual
again drove the eight-hour drive, scared to death, but totally trusting
God. But this time we came home with Harrison. He was ours.
who loves school and wants to please.
He has taught me patience and
{John}
understanding but, most of all, he
I had many questions about open adoption and, as we went through
the support meeting, we finally understood the rationale behind an
has taught me to have a deeper
open adoption.
compassion for our fellow human beings
– and he doesn’t even realize it.
As I think back to 12 years ago and analyze the adoption process,
”
–John Kaufman
I can say without a doubt that an open adoption is the only way
to go. As Susie said, we experienced a wide range of feelings from
great joy to total despair. Each of our experiences has brought us
closer as family and through our experiences, we have developed a
deeper understanding for the adoption process.
We have learned to love Harrison’s birthmother and understand
After the shock finally subsided,again we were hit with life-chang-
and appreciate the sacrifices she made in placing Harrison for adop-
ing news:Our baby would have Down syndrome.Our team of doctors
tion. We also have learned to respect her desires to be a part of
recommended that I terminate the pregnancy since it was already
Harrison’s life or not to be a part of his life – we’ve learned not to judge
pulling on my kidneys and eyes. Devastated again, we began praying
but to love.
and reading everything we could on Down syndrome.
Through prayer, we decided that we would be terrific parents for
a child with Down syndrome, so we continued the pregnancy. I was
There have been times where we didn’t hear from her for years
and there were other times when we heard from her weekly. There
was even a time when she lived with us.
hospitalized six different times during the pregnancy; the final hos-
Each moment helped us grow as a person and a family.Our adop-
pitalization lasted 41 days. During my last hospital stay, the doctors
tion experience has made us champions for open adoption and
decided the baby needed to be delivered early – six weeks early.
every opportunity I have, I’m eager to tell our story about how a child
We were proud parents of a baby boy. He weighed 6 pounds, 15
can change everyone around you. Harrison is a shy, loving individual
ounces and was immediately placed in the neonatal ward at the hos-
who loves school and wants to please. He has taught me patience
pital. He remained there for one month. He was a healthy child – no
and understanding but, most of all, he has taught me to have a
Down syndrome. God had given us a miracle.
deeper compassion for our fellow human beings – and he doesn’t
Six years later,we went down the road again.We prayed for a long
even realize it. Luke said it best when he said that adopting Harrison
time and chose Buckner for our adoption.We went through two years
didn’t just change Harrison’s life, but all of our lives. What a blessing
of screening and waiting, but finally a young woman chose us as the
he is.
adoptive family.At the time,we lived in Booker,Texas,eight hours from
Dallas.We traveled to Buckner and met the birthmother. She liked us.
So for the next few months, we prepared our hearts and our house
for our new baby.
On Nov. 8, 2001, we received a call that she was in labor.We made
the trip and arrived after he had been delivered. For the next three
{Susie}
This year marks the 10th anniversary of Harrison’s adoption. Has
the adoption process changed our lives? Most definitely. We have so
much faith in God’s will now that it is unbelievable.
days, we held our new baby. Sunday afternoon came and we went
Every time we try to help God or give Him our ideas for ways to fix
back to the hotel to pack and prepare for the transfer. When we got
problems, He gently reminds us that His way is the best way. We
back to the hospital, we found out she had left with the child.
should just be patient and watch His perfect will unfold.Have we had
She had changed her mind.We were devastated.We made the trip
some difficult times? Yes, we have.
home with broken hearts.My arms were sore from holding him for three
Would we change any of these experiences we went through?
days and now they were empty.We prayed and told God we wanted His
Definitely not.We have grown stronger,become more compassionate
will for us. If this was not the child He had for us we would wait for His
and understanding, and matured into a better family because of one
perfect will.Three weeks later, the birthmother called and said she was
small child and the circumstances surrounding his journey to be-
now ready to place her baby. She had tried her best to keep him. We
coming a Kaufman. ■
Buckner Today 45
‘PURE JOY’
Adoptive family of four Russian children recounts 10-year journey
By Chelsea Quackenbush • Photography by Russ Dilday
n an unseasonably warm Valentine’s Day evening,the Potts family
and 13, respectively, Bob and Donita flew to Russia right before
gathers at their grandparents’ home in a Dallas suburb, not just
Christmas to bring them home and make them part of their family.
O
to share sweets and candy hearts, but to tell the story of how they
They call that day, Dec. 7, their “gotcha” day.
came to be a family.
The oldest son is home from military duty along the Texas-Mexico
___________________________ 34 ___________________________
border. The oldest daughter left her studies in her college dorm to
join them. The younger daughter has the night off from both of her
For a long time, Pasha and Natasha were unsure if they wanted to
jobs.The youngest son, still in high school, doesn’t have a choice but
be adopted. Orphanage workers asked them repeatedly over the
to be there.
years if they wanted them to find a
They gather in the living room of
“forever family”for the pair.They said no.
their grandparents’ house.The boys play
They still had family in Russia. Their
pool while Bob Potts watches over them
older brother could’ve gone to get them.
from nearby. Anyone can see he’s proud
They had a godparent, an aunt, an uncle,
of his boys.
all who promised to rescue them or at
Donita Potts sits on a large floral couch
in the living room with her daughters.The
the very least, take them on vacation.
They held onto that hope for years.
oldest, Natasha, 22, curls up on the couch
Their birth mother had been to visit
adjacent to her.Masha,20,having worked
them once while they were in the or-
from six in the morning until 10 or 11
phanage. And then they realized that the
o’clock at night the previous day, plunks
hope of being reunited with their family
herself on the floor across the coffee
was gone.
table where she tries not to fall asleep.
So the last time orphanage staff asked
The scene is normal. It’s quintessen-
them if they wanted a family, they said
tial American. But once the kids start
yes. They had been visited by other kids
talking, you realize there’s something
who’d been adopted and saw how happy
special about the family.
As 19-year-old Dima, the last of her
babies, prepares to leave the nest in the
spring following his high school gradua-
they were in their new families. They
wanted that, too.
After that, Natasha said, they did not
stop bugging orphanage staff for a family.
tion, Donita pauses to think back over the
But being older was going to make adoption difficult.Pasha
past 10 years when the four – and then six
was about the age when most kids are moved to a different orphan-
– of them became a family.
age where adoption is not an option.
Natasha and the oldest son, Pasha,23, are siblings who grew up in
Little did Natasha and Pasha know, a couple in Dallas had seen
a Russian orphanage until adolescence. In 2002, when they were 12
their photo in a copy of Buckner Today in 2000 and was already in the
Buckner Today 47
process to adopt them.
Bob and Donita wrestled with the idea of children for most of their
Potts and Natasha and Pasha said yes, they wanted to be adopted by
Bob and Donita.
marriage. They considered adopting a child from China in the sum-
On Bob and Donita’s first trip to Russia,Pasha and Natasha greeted
mer of 2000 but felt they were getting too old. They said they just
them at the airport. The two youngsters broke through airport cus-
weren’t very motivated to expand their family at that time.
toms and ran to their future parents,calling,“Momma! Papa!,”hugging
And then at a birthday lunch for Bob in November 2000, his sister
brought the magazine that one of her voice students had given her.
It was Buckner Today.
and crying.
“I felt pure joy,” Donita told Buckner Today in 2002.“I had been
praying that we would connect.They immediately latched on to us.”
The magazine featured photos and profiles of children waiting to
“Knowing the kids were as big as they were,we even talked about
be adopted from Russia through Buckner. He took the magazine to
whether the kids would call us Momma and Papa,” Bob said in the
Donita later that day.
same interview.“We didn’t know what they would call us.But hearing
As Bob told Buckner Today in a 2002 article,“I showed (Donita) the
them call me Papa was the greatest thing in the world.”
picture of Natasha and Pasha and she said,‘I think these are the ones.’
Pasha and Natasha settled into their new lives in the United States
It was like God said,‘OK, these are the kids.’ Before we even got out of
with relative ease. They learned English quickly and by the second
the car, we called the number.”
month, the family no longer needed their translator.
___________________________ 34 ___________________________
Natasha spent in the U.S.They had only been living here a few weeks
One of their sweetest memories was the first Christmas Pasha and
so they were still working on their English.
Pasha and Natasha knew something was happening when a staff
On that Christmas morning, Pasha got a bike. He was silent. Bob
member interviewed and filmed them. Their questioning became
and Donita prompted him to try to say in English what he was thinking.
more frequent.Finally, the orphanage director brought a video of the
He ran and got his English-Russian dictionary and furiously looked up
word after word. And finally, he said,“No tongue!” He was speechless,
without words.
Donita finally had to say,‘No Russian at the dinner table!’
They were concerned that perhaps Masha and Dima weren’t
Donita recalled how Natasha cried that morning.She was worried
learning English as quickly as their older brother and sister.They went
that she was having bad feelings come up about Russia and her life.
to meet their teachers one night at school and they all commented on
Turns out,Natasha simply was not a morning person and she was cry-
how wonderful Masha and Dima were doing in school and how well
ing because she wanted to go back to bed.
their English was coming along.
They all laugh about it now as they think of how far their family
has come since that first Christmas.
Bob and Donita were stunned.“We didn’t even know they knew
English!”they recall now, laughing.“We got home that night and said
‘no more translating.’”
___________________________ 34 ___________________________
___________________________ 34 ___________________________
Several years later, in June 2004, the Potts family hosted two children through the Buckner “Angels from Abroad” program, which is
The Potts are about to be empty nesters but they couldn’t be more
paused temporarily due to changes in legislation with the Russian
proud of their kids. Pasha returned in February from his deployment
government.The program brings Russian orphans to the U.S. for two
to the Texas border.He enlisted in the Army National Guard as soon as
weeks and allows them to stay with a family to experience what fam-
he was eligible. Bob said from the moment he arrived in the U.S. 10
ily life is like.
years ago,he wanted to be known as an American,not a Russian.“He’s
Enter Masha and Dima,a brother and sister pair from a Russian or-
a very patriotic fellow.”
phanage. At the time, Bob and Donita agreed to host because they
Natasha is studying Russian studies at the University of Texas at
knew Pasha and Natasha wanted to be translators. They had no in-
Arlington and hopes to be a Russian translator one day.She’s received
tention of adopting more children.
many honors for her academic achievements and speaks at Buckner
They saw from the beginning that Masha was a headstrong young
lady. She wanted her way and wouldn’t take any other answer.
Masha asked her father if he remembered the first time she tried
spaghetti. And Tabasco. (He did).
One night, the family had spaghetti and Masha spotted the
Tabasco sauce. She motioned that she wanted some. Bob told her not
events from time to time about her experience being adopted from
a Russian orphanage.
Masha works two jobs and has a place of her own. She graduated
from J. J. Pearce High School in Richardson in 2011 but hasn’t made
any decisions on college yet. Dima, 19, will graduate from Pearce in
May and plans to study electrical engineering at Richland College.
to eat it because it was really hot.So Masha proceeded to grab the bot-
Although the four have had a great life since coming to the U.S.,
tle and dump“way more than I would ever use,”Bob said,on her pasta.
they know they’re lucky. If they had stayed in Russia, they guess that
“We made her eat it all,” Bob said with a smile.
they would’ve ended up like the majority of Russian children who age
“I hate spicy,” Masha grumbled.
out of the orphanage system – on the streets or working as prosti-
Donita said she could tell within the first few days that Bob’s heart
tutes.
was changing, that Masha and Dima were supposed to be their kids.
Natasha and Pasha said they didn’t know about their photo in
But she didn’t feel that way.She repeated,‘not adopting,not adopting,
Buckner Today until much later after they were adopted.All they knew
not adopting, no, no, no.’
at the time was that they were going to have a mom and dad, a fam-
But when it came time to bring Masha and Dima back to the airport, her heart broke. She couldn’t believe they had to leave. And she
knew right then and there that they were supposed to be her kids.
ily who would love them. They wouldn’t be orphans the rest of their
lives.They would have a future.
But perhaps the biggest blessing has been on Bob and Donita.
So they wrote letters back and forth and sent pictures.And on Dec.
“The most memorable part of it all has been the joy of seeing
21, 2004, the Potts brought Masha and Dima home to be the newest
them grow up and learn to be on their own … The heartache of see-
additions to their family.
ing them grow up and learn to be on their own,”Bob said.“It’s just an
The transition from a family of four to a family of six wasn’t easy.
awesome blessing to have them in my family. People always say,‘Oh,
There were a lot of personality clashes and hard bumps along the way.
what you did is so great, so noble.’ And I say,‘No, it wasn’t. It was self-
They had to establish boundaries and responsibilities. They had to
ish. I wanted kids.’I don’t think of it as noble at all.I think what they did,
share bedrooms, something Pasha and Natasha weren’t used to.
moving all these thousands of miles,halfway around the world, learn-
While Pasha and Natasha were forced to learn English quickly,
Masha and Dima used their older siblings as translators. Bob and
ing to speak English, you know, learning a whole new way of life …
That’s noble.” ■
Buckner Today 49
DeLesa Morrison always had goals.
She just wasn’t sure how to reach them.
The second of seven siblings, DeLesa often felt more like a parent
than a child because she grew up taking care of the younger ones in
the family.Her mother was a homemaker and her father worked.Their
life was hard and money was always tight.
the childcare center were able to get Tray the help he needed.
DeLesa graduated from Angelina College and Family Place in May
1999. She spent one more year in Lufkin, but she had Houston in her
sights the entire time.She took her pick of job offers,and she and Tray
packed up and moved into their new life.
She worked as a radiology technician at Cypress-Fairbanks Hospital, saved up her money, and in 2001, became a homeowner. Over the
When she graduated from high school,she continued to set aside
years, she discovered her passion for women’s health. She took con-
her goals to focus on her siblings. But after a year, she decided it was
tinuing education courses in the subject,passed the board exams and
time to do what she wanted. She used her boyfriend as her escape
got her start in mammography at the Kelsey-Seybold Clinic,where she
and moved in with him at 19,but by the time she was 21,she was rais-
has been working since 2003.She has also worked in the mammogra-
ing a child again – their newborn son,Tradarrius.
phy department for the Harris County Hospital District since 2004.
By Lauren Hollon Sturdy • Photography by Russ Dilday
Though she had her own set of struggles, DeLesa continued to
help her family as much as she could. At 23, she took care of her
younger siblings while raising a 2-year-old, trying to pass her prerequisite courses for radiology, working a part-time job and dealing with
her son’s abusive father.
Turning point
She was sinking beneath the weight of too many responsibilities
and didn’t have any options until she read an article in the local paper
about a new program for single mothers. Buckner Family Place
opened in Lufkin in 1997, and DeLesa was among the first residents
to move in.She had just been accepted into a two-year radiology program at Angelina College and had won two scholarships.Things were
coming together, and she felt like God led her there.
DeLesa got her first real taste of independence, and it was sweet.
Raising teens
DeLesa hasn’t seemed to age one bit in the 13 years since she was
last featured in Buckner Today, but Tray has grown into a young man.
Before Buckner,she had to rely on her family or Tray’s father to help take
The high school junior seems quiet and introverted until you get
care of Tray while DeLesa worked and went to school. With childcare
him talking about games.He is obsessed with video games,writes his
available on the Family Place campus,she knew Tray was in good hands.
own roleplaying narratives (RPs) and draws anime-style sketches of
She also had access to resources she might never have found oth-
the characters in his stories. His RPs are incredibly detailed; his latest
erwise – like diagnoses for Tray’s speech impediment and learning
one filled about 90 pages with character descriptions and storytelling.
disabilities. Because he was diagnosed early, DeLesa and the staff at
He’s been working on his voice acting to go along with his characters,
Buckner Today 51
From Left: Delesa and LaNeail Alexander; Stephon and Deylan; and Tray
too. One of them is British.
Tray is doing well in school. He’s on the A/B honor roll every semester and his favorite classes are Web design and animation.After he
going on, they had thrown rings at each other. All was quickly forgiven, though, when they realized how funny and ironic the whole
situation was.
graduates,Tray’s dream is to go to school to become a game designer.
She became DeLesa Morrison Alexander in 2007 when they mar-
Tray always has a ready video game partner in his cousin,Stephon,
ried after a year of dating. Their life together hasn’t been without
who started living with their family in January. They’re both 17 but
struggles – most notably, dealing with infertility.
that’s where the similarities end. Stephon is outgoing and talkative,
DeLesa and LaNeail wanted to have children together, but after
loves music and wants to work in the entertainment industry. He’s al-
their diagnosis, they weren’t sure it would happen for them.While re-
ready paving his way, making connections with a local record label
searching their options, DeLesa came across the Tinina Q. Cade
and acting as the manager of a talented singer he met at church.
Foundation, a nonprofit dedicated to serving families battling infer-
DeLesa encourages the boys’ dreams, but always emphasizes the
tility and providing financial assistance for infertility treatment or
importance of education. Both boys have grown up watching
domestic adoption.They applied for a grant, said a prayer and waited.
DeLesa’s hard work and successes, so they tend to listen.
Out of more than 200 applicants,their family was chosen as one of six
to receive assistance.
Love and marriage
Even with the financial backing to go through with in vitro fertil-
There have been developments in DeLesa’s love life, too. She met
ization, the process was invasive and hard on the family. Their first
her husband, LaNeail Alexander, at Lyndon B. Johnson General Hos-
embryo transfer was unsuccessful but their doctor offered to do a sec-
pital when he was passing out fliers for a poetry reading.They hit it off
ond transfer at no cost.Nine months later,Deylan came into the world.
immediately over their shared love of poetry, but DeLesa was nerv-
Now, he’s a busy 16-month-old, getting into everything and turning
ous about how Tray would feel, seeing his mom dating. She waited
their world upside down.
for three months to introduce them, and they quickly built a rapport.
When Deylan gets a little older, DeLesa hopes to continue her ed-
LaNeail could relate to Tray, because he, too, had an absent father and
ucation, pursuing her bachelor’s and master’s degrees in health
was an only child for much of his childhood.
administration, keeping sight of her goal of managing a radiology or
After six months of dating, DeLesa and LaNeail started ring shopping without telling each other. They were both planning a surprise
mammography department.But, for now, she’s happy with where life
has taken her.
proposal and they picked the same day to do it.When the day came,
“I’m so, so blessed,” DeLesa said.“I’m so blessed and favored by
they got into an argument because each kept unwittingly throwing
God. I have independence and financial means. I’m stable. I’m happy.
the other’s plans off course. By the time they figured out what was
I’m blessed.We feel that God has touched us in so many ways.” ■
OLD SOLDIERS NEVER DIE
World War I lives on in memory of Ed Niedermaier | Story by Scott Collins
hen Florence Green died in February, I thought about Ed
I pitched his story to the media and a producer at the “CBS Evening
Niedermaier.
News”picked it up.Ed was featured on national news and before long,
W
Florence Green was 110 and it’s believed she was the last living
veteran from World War I. The New York Times referred to her as ‘the
last anywhere of the tens of millions who served.’
Ed Niedermaier was one of those millions.
every television station in the Dallas area was on the story.
Ed died soon after turning 100. After his death, Louise continued
living at Buckner until her death. She also continued his patriotic
traditions.
I met Ed and his wife, Louise, in 1994 and was immediately en-
One of the proudest moments during the past 18 years I’ve
chanted by them, especially their stories of the Great War. They lived
worked at Buckner is May 12, 2000. It was the grand opening of the
at the Buckner Retirement Village in Dallas.
DFW National Cemetery and I had the privilege of escorting Louise
Ed was born in Eudoria,Kans.,in 1895,only 16 years after R.C.Buck-
to the event.
ner started his ministry. After serving in the Army, he raised three
children as a widower during the Depression, retired
in 1961, remarried and moved to Buckner in 1983.
Ed served in France during the war. In 1919, he returned to the United States. He was given $60 and a
train ticket back to his hometown, but he never forgot
the price of democracy.
He settled in Oklahoma City and became a welder,
working in an oil tanker factory. But his service to his
country didn’t end.
Ed became active in the American Legion and was involved with the Veterans of World War I as the commander
of the Oklahoma City chapter until 1966, when his life
changed again.
While participating in a regional meeting in Durant,
Okla., he met Louise, a widow of another war veteran. Eight
months later, they were married and living Dallas. The move
to Dallas only enhanced Ed’s patriotic activities. He was elected com-
It was a hot May day. I picked her up at the Village in my pickup,
mander of Barracks 765, the WWI veterans’chapter in Pleasant Grove.
apologizing for driving her in a truck. It didn’t bother her, though.We
He also served as Texas State Commander and Regional Commander
drove to the cemetery in Southwest Dallas and I worried the entire
for Veterans of World War I.
time that she might get too hot.
Ed and Louise were fixtures at every Dallas-area patriotic celebra-
But she was like a giddy schoolgirl on her first date. I watched in
tion. He was often featured at Fourth of July, Memorial Day and
amazement as veterans, dignitaries and two congressmen greeted
Veterans Day commemorations.
Louise with deference and complete respect. When Congressman
Every day, as regular as the sunrise, Ed would ride his motorized
scooter just past the front door of his quad unit at Buckner Retirement Village and raise his American flag. It was his way of saying
thanks to a nation that had given him so much.
When I met them, Ed was 99 and about to turn 100. I was fascinated by their story and their commitment to freedom and the U.S.
Pete Sessions walked far out of his way to pay his respects to her,
I beamed and thought to myself,‘She’s my date.’
The orphans I’ve met around the world have made me grateful
for my parents and they have made me a better parent.The people living in poverty that I’ve met have given me resolve to help the poor.Ed
and Louise Niedermaier made me a better American. ■
Buckner Today 53
By John Wiggins
A
little more than two years ago, Juan Pablo
left Guatemala and arrived in Indiana
with us, his new family and permanent home.
We first met him when he was 3 years old
and brought him home at age 7. Now he’s
9. His transition to living in a new place
with his new family could not have been
smoother. Though our adoption process
spanned three years, we reflect on
how God had shaped and prepared Juan
Pablo’s heart to be able to leave what he knew as home to
be joined to a new family and environment.
Big brother
Less than three months after coming home, Juan Pablo – now affectionately known as“JP”– welcomed home someone else – his new
baby brother, Samuel. JP was thrilled at the thought of being an
older sibling.We weren’t concerned about how JP would bond with
his younger brother since he was commonly seen caring for the
toddlers at the orphanage in Guatemala.
Sam is almost 2 now and his brother is his best friend. We
are so amazed how JP commits time to his brother through
playing with trains, reading books or wrestling around with
their dog,Mala.We regularly hear them laughing together or
at one another. In Sam’s eyes, JP is a hero.
Love of learning
The school day for JP takes place at home.Emily is a stay-athome mom and a licensed teacher who focuses her gifts,
experience and energy to educate her son. Once a week, they
attend classes through a local homeschool co-op where JP
learns with kids his age. Emily teaches Spanish class as part of
that group,while other moms teach subjects such as Bible,public speaking, music, history and science. Science is JP’s favorite
because he’s building a rocket.
JP is in second grade and has made great progress with his
reading and learning English.He also has been playing piano for more
to grow as he grows.
than a year and has more recently been learning guitar with me. He
In December 2010, JP had skin expanders inserted under his jaw
has performed at a couple of small recitals and played a song at a local
line. Every week for a few months, JP returned to a clinic where the
retirement home.
surgeon filled the tissue expanders to expand skin that would be
moved halfway up on his cheeks and chin. In March 2011, the proce-
Play ball
If you have ever met JP, you know that he is kind-hearted, funny, a
good dancer and quite energetic.With all his energy,we thought that
dure was completed to remove the burns and attach the new skin.
We are so happy with the results. The new skin allows JP’s skin to
stretch into adulthood as well as grow facial hair.
it would be a good idea to use it constructively by playing sports. He
Shortly after the procedure, JP commented how, unlike before, he
loves any kind of sport but thrives in soccer. He has become a leader
had so much more feeling in areas on his face where the new skin was
on the field and contributes a goal
placed.A few months after the sur-
nearly every game.
gery, Emily caught JP smiling in the
In the spring of 2011, JP and his
mirror and he commented on how
team won the season-ending tour-
he really likes his new smile.‘Praise
nament, but one of our proudest
God’ is all we can say.
moments came during a game
We have now begun a second
when the other team’s coach was
expansion process that will wrap up
yelling at his goalie to pick up the
with a surgery this spring. We have
ball. The poor little girl didn’t un-
been teaching our son how God
derstand what her coach was
was with him during his accident
saying, so JP picked up the ball and
and has great plans for him. We
gave it to her. He was penalized for
also stress that though this opera-
his action in that play, but all the
tion has helped him, he will always
parents commented on his sweet
heart. His heart always shines through.
have scars and imperfections.
This has been a struggle for us. My wife, Emily, shared that one
After soccer season, JP plays baseball through the summer and
morning during school JP asked if he could have his new scars re-
has become a good hitter. During his first season and exposure to
moved—the scars holding the new and old skin together. Our
baseball, he was positioned in the outfield. Most little leaguers kick
emphasis to him is to remember his significance in the sight of God
dirt around and pick up dandelions, but JP was always entertaining
his Creator and his family who see him just as when we first met him.
the crowd with his dancing during or after plays. He has matured as a
Emily cried out to God for help as to how to teach this complex con-
player in the past year, during which he played third base and hit his
cept to a 9-year-old.
first home run.
Later that evening, we tuned in to the season premiere of “Danc-
With all the activity, I have discovered just how dirty boys can get.
ing with the Stars.” The first contestant was J.R. Martinez, a military
After telling JP to take a shower after a baseball game,he commented,
veteran who had been in a roadside explosion while stationed in Iraq.
“I don’t need a shower because my sweat washed all the dirt away.”He
He was burned on his face and he went through numerous proce-
is always making us laugh. During the winter, JP participates in Boy
dures similar to JP. He had a great testimony about being content
Scouts and swims as part of a swim club.
despite what had happened to him. The women went crazy for him;
He was an amazing dancer and ended up winning the show. What a
A new smile
great role model for JP and it was exactly the time we needed it.
When we first met JP, he stole our hearts with his personality and
God is so faithful.We are not parenting alone and when faced with
joy despite carrying scars from an accident earlier in his young life.
a difficulty, all we need to do is ask and find that He is there to walk
Our eyes were opened to see him just as Jesus sees him – without
with us through any struggle. Like J.R. Martinez, JP has a great oppor-
blemish and beautiful.
tunity and platform to share his story to a watching world for the glory
During JP’s first year with us in the U.S.,we visited a number of physi-
and sake of Jesus Christ. As parents, we hope to build up JP to main-
cians at Riley Hospital for Children in Indianapolis, including a plastic
tain his compassionate heart and share God’s love with confidence to
surgeon.He recommended tissue expansion surgery to allow his face
those who will hear him. ■
Buckner Today 55
FULL HOUSE:
FAMILY OF EIGHT FILLS HOME WITH LOVE.
By Chelsea Quackenbush • Photography by Scott Collins
In the Rio Grande Valley, when it’s hot, it’s really hot.
And when it’s cold, it’s really cold.
neighbors who were playing volleyball when they met a girl who knew
Just ask the Urbano family.The family of eight used to sleep crum-
about Buckner and how it helps families in the South Texas commu-
pled up on the floor in a tiny trailer in a colonias neighborhood.They
slept there for three years.They had no hot water.
The children – Rocio,now 14;Rafael Jr.,10;Oman,7;Miriam,6;Karla,
20 months;and Karina,8 months – couldn’t go to school.Their parents,
Rafael and Aracely, felt helpless.
One day, Aracely and the kids were outside selling fruit to their
nities. She got them uniforms so they could go to school.
Before they knew it,construction on a new home began where the
old, run-down trailer once stood.
They had previously been promised a new home by a nearby
school but the promise was broken.Although the family felt deceived,
“we knew there was something different with Buckner,”Aracely said.
When they first moved in, the whole family lined up down the hall
to take a hot shower. The Urbanos are diligent about keeping the
house clean and put together. They try to take care of it as much as
they can, Rafael said.
“We had been praying about a new house and we knew this time
would be different,”Aracely said.“It’s a motivation for my family.As God
allows us to grow, we want to help someone else.”
The family said they were happy to be able to clean something.
They all call it a great blessing from God.
They have ample space to cook, to sit and do homework, and to
sleep. The countertops are spotless. The floors of the children’s bedrooms are spotless.
“They’ve been through a lot,”Buckner mission coordinator Gabriel
Flores said.“You could tell this family would be successful. Their yard
and trailer were clean,which is not something you see often.They didn’t have much but it was clean.”
Rafael and Aracely said their family is more united now and they
are able to help each other.They have a motivation to be better and do
something. Also with help from Buckner, Rafael was able to secure a
job as the main cook at a local restaurant,Don Felipe.Aracely sells fruit
around town.
“They ask the kids to take care of the house, not just because
someone gave it to them,but because they want to,”Flores said.“They
want them to learn so they’ll continue to take care of things in life.Their
Rafael Urbano looks on as his daughter, Karla, pops out to say “hello.”
family is just amazing.” ■
Buckner Today 57
Former Rio Grande Valley Children’s Home resident still paves the way
A
t 5 o’clock on a Wednesday, Ruby Salinas rushes into the
some unofficial, unexplained vote, decided she was the leader.She lis-
Buckner STAR offices in Harlingen,Texas,her dark hair chasing
tened to their problems.She stuck up for kids when they felt they didn’t
her as she breathlessly bursts through the door.
have a voice. Above all, she encouraged them to have a voice.
“I’m so sorry I’m late,” she says as she catches her breath.“My dog,
ugh, she ate up everything in my house. I just
couldn’t get it clean in time. I mean, it was everything.” She makes large gestures with her hands
“Ruby is a leader,” said Tommy Speed, former home administrator
By Chelsea Quackenbush
Photography by Scott Collins
as she explains.
One of the reasons she’s out of breath and didn’t have time to clean
and now regional director of Buckner in West Texas,
in the 2000 article.
Over the past 12 years,Speed said Ruby has grown
into a confident woman.
“She’s doing really well,”he said.“She’s determined to succeed and
up the mess her dog made is because she keeps herself busy as the
very dependable. She’s the kind of person that when she says
recreation specialist at Willacy County Correctional Center in Ray-
she’s going to do something, she does it.”
mondville, Texas. She oversees everything related to leisure and
recreation, including setting up basketball games between inmates,
providing crafts and showing movies. She oversees inmate workers
and officers.
More than an
orphan
When she was younger,
“I didn’t think I could do it this long,”she says.“I thought they would
kids at church and school used
say, ‘Oh, she’s just a girl.’But the wardens have been telling me,‘you’re
to call her an orphan and ridi-
doing a great job.’ They hear me get after those inmates.”
cule her for not having parents.
Leadership was one of the key qualities about Ruby that was highlighted the last time she appeared in Buckner Today in summer 2000.
But in the end, it made her
tougher.
After living at the Rio Grande Children’s Home in Mission from age 6 to
“I did learn a lot,” she says.“At
18, she was prepared to graduate and head off to college. Her leader-
the beginning, I hated it when
ship and independence earned her the nickname ‘Queen of the
they’d say, ‘Oh, you’re just an or-
Campus,’ which describes her role at work, too.
phan.’ I hated it. Nobody wants to
“The men, a lot of them are scared of me,” she says, laughing.“You
be told that … But I didn’t really
have to have full energy to be there.You always have to be on guard. I
have time to be a kid.You kind of had
have to go into the dorms and talk to those inmates.And of course they
to watch out for yourself.You have to
see you and they’re like,‘She’s just a girl.’ But they don’t mess with me.
have your guard up all the time.”
They learn the first time, don’t pull anything on me. I’ll tell you straight
up.They don’t like it but they’ve already told me,‘Miss, you scare us.’”
As hard as it was for her to hear that, she knew she was in the right
place.Living with her family only would’ve brought her down,she said.
Ruby knows that if she hadn’t lived at the children’s home,she wouldn’t
‘Queen of the Campus’
Ruby has earned every ounce of respect she’s gained. A rare situation, Ruby was one of the few children under Buckner’s custodianship
be the person she is today. She would’ve ended up in the vice grip of
drugs, gangs and violence that had a stronghold on her family.
Contact with her family remains limited today.
in the Buckner Children and Family Services statewide ministry. Her
“They always gave me the guilt trip,” she explains.“They said,‘You
journey to Buckner began in 1987 when her mother left her in Mexico
need to come do this, you need to come do that.’ And I was like, you
with friends because“my stepfather didn’t like me that much,”she told
never came to see me.You never came to any of my games.You always
Buckner Today in 2000.
said you were gonna come pick me up and you never showed up. I
The friends called her father to come get her but he couldn’t take
care of her and neither could her grandmother, she said, so she ended
up at Buckner.
would wait and wait and wait and they’d never come.”
Ruby was determined to change her future. She finished a bachelor’s degree in education from Howard Payne University in 2009. She
Houseparents and staff quickly found that she had her now-fa-
taught school for a couple years and ended up back in the Valley. She
mous independent streak.She was the go-between for other children
has the people in her life who she considers “family” – maybe not in
there and the houseparents and staff. Everyone trusted Ruby and in
the traditional sense, but family nonetheless. ■
Buckner Today 59
I
n summer 1998, Melody Molin had just graduated from Texas A&M University-Commerce and was bound for Baylor Law School. Fourteen years
have passed since the former Buckner Children’s Village resident embarked
on her journey toward a career as an attorney, and in the meantime, her life
has changed dramatically.
She graduated from Baylor Law School in July 2001, did well on the bar
exam and went to work at an asbestos litigation firm in Houston.That same
year, she became Melody Petitt when she married her husband, Wayne, in
November.Two stops later, after being an assistant attorney general for the
State of Texas and then working for a solo practitioner,she realized that what
she wanted most was to work for herself.
In October 2004, Melody opened her own private practice, and
Brooke and Buddy; two cats,Tom Cat and Miss Kitty; and their newest
seven years later,she hasn’t looked back.She’s earned the nickname‘Pit
additions, Henny Penny and Jenny the Guinea. Melody bought the
Bull’ from one of her colleagues. “She’s really tough in the courtroom,”
birds from Dan‘the Chicken Man’at their local farmers market last Oc-
Wayne said. But Melody is a little more modest. “I don’t know if that’s
tober – a decision she chalks up to pregnancy hormones. Alexander
what it is,”she said. “I think it’s sort of like I’m a dog with a bone.When I
likes the birds, but he maintains that he’s“a baby keeper, not a chicken
believe in something,I push really hard and I’m going to pursue it as far
keeper.”“He loves having a little sister,”Melody says.
as I can.”
They’re also busy with their backyard garden, and another recent
Her tenacity helps her win court cases, but it also has helped her
life change – veganism – due to family food allergies.But Melody loves
move past the trauma and setbacks she experienced earlier in life.
to cook, something she says she never would have predicted 14 years
Melody and her two brothers and sister
suffered physical and emotional abuse
and neglect at their mother’s hand.
By Lauren Hollon Sturdy
Photography by Chelsea Quackenbush
ago, and their new diet has given her
plenty of opportunities for culinary experimentation – dishes like “mac and not
Melody tried her best to raise her siblings when her mother left them
cheese”and vegan whole-wheat chocolate cherry cake with chocolate
for weeks at a time,but eventually,the stress became too much for her.
ganache.“It was surprisingly very good,”Melody says.
She ran away from home several times,and at the end of her freshman
year, she learned that she would have to repeat the ninth grade.
After some time off with her new baby, Melody is back at work.
But since she’s self-employed, her office has a few things many others
Child Protective Services removed Melody from her home when
don’t – like a crib, a play mat and an infant. She goes into the office
she was 15, but her siblings stayed behind. She moved into Buckner
two or three days a week. The rest of the time, the wonders of tech-
Children’s Village in Beaumont
nology let her access her office
and began working to over-
server remotely from almost
come what she had been
anywhere. She specializes in
through. She was suffering
family law, handling divorce,
from serious depression. She
child support and child custody
worked on healing in her coun-
cases. She also works as an ad
seling and therapy sessions
litem in CPS cases,representing
with Buckner staff. She refused
children in court for free.
to let anything hold her back
“I feel very blessed to have
and set out to graduate high
the best of both worlds,”
school on time by taking sum-
Melody says.“I can still do work
mer school and night classes.
that I enjoy and be a good mom
And she succeeded.
to my children.”
Her life today stands in
Family is important to Melody,
sharp contrast to the lives of
and Buckner still falls under that
her siblings — something
umbrella for her. Even Alexan-
Melody attributes to the help and opportunities she received after
der knows.He can go straight to his parents’wedding album and point
leaving her home.She’s convinced that,had she stayed,she’d either be
out the photos of Randy Daniels,former administrator for Buckner Chil-
dead or addicted to drugs with a string of dead-end jobs behind her.
dren and Family Services in Beaumont and current vice president of
“I feel very grateful and fortunate that somebody found me,” she
global initiatives.Randy walked Melody down the aisle at her wedding.
says.“If they hadn’t, I wouldn’t have a sense of self, I wouldn’t have a
When she visits the Buckner Children’s Village, Melody says it’s like
purpose, I wouldn’t have an education… I wouldn’t have anything.
going to a family reunion. She still keeps in touch with Pat Hitt, who
They took me in and gave me a purpose and supported me in every
was a counselor when Melody lived at Buckner,Laura May,the current
way possible for such a long time. It just amazes me every day that
administrator and Randy, whenever he’s in the U.S.
there are people that care that much that they’re willing to devote
their lives to other people in that kind of service.”
“I realized that Buckner has been a part of my life much longer than
my actual natural family was,” Melody says.“I got to Buckner when I
Her life these days is chaotic, but not in a bad way. She and Wayne
was 15.I am 37 now.That’s 22 years later that I’m still thinking about this
have an energetic 6-year-old son, Alexander, and a precious 4-month-
place as home or these people as my family as opposed to my own
old daughter,Ori,who was born in December.They also have two dogs,
family.To me, that’s a really big deal.” ■
Buckner Today 61
TWO SISTERS, SIX YEARS,
ONE FAMILY
Donna Wells vividly remembers the first time she met her now-fos-
“My maturity level has gotten higher,”Becky said.“I’m not as angry
or as fearful as I used to be … I appreciate that they took us in and
ter daughter, Becky.
She and her husband,Ron,were at Buckner to pick up a little girl to
they’ve taken care of us for all this time.They take me to and from prac-
come live with them but it wasn’t Becky. The 9-year-old ran up to
tice. They run me around all the time. And sometimes I forget to really
Donna and tapped her.
thank them for it. I’m really grateful for everything they’ve done.”
“She said,‘I want to come live with you,’”Donna said.“And that just
“The jury is still out on that one!”Ron joked about her maturity.
grabbed my heart.I hugged her but it wasn’t in the making at all.When
we left, I told Ron,‘Oh, they have to come live with us.’”
The overcomers
When Buckner contacted the Wells about two months later to take
Bridget and Becky have flourished in the years they’ve lived with
in Becky,now 15,and her older sister Bridget,17,they knew it was sup-
the Wells. Ron and Donna are diligent about finding out each child’s
posed to happen.So the girls went to live with the Wells and have been
strengths and gifts and helping them pursue opportunities they oth-
there for almost six years.
Bridget and Becky recalled being
scared when they first got to the Wells
By Chelsea Quackenbush
Photography by Lauren Hollon Sturdy
erwise might not have.
Bridget is quiet and soft-spoken –‘introverted,’ according to Donna. She’s a
house.They were angry that they couldn’t go back to their parents.They
talented writer and poet.It’s hard for her to get words out without tears
had no idea what to expect from foster care, especially after hearing
escaping from behind her thick maroon glasses when she’s asked to
many horror stories of abuse.
describe how she’s changed over the past six years.
In the beginning, there were violent outbursts and a lot of yelling
“I’m not as angry as I used to be,” she said, looking over to her sis-
and screaming. A lot of tears. A lot of anger. Bridget dealt with a lot of
ter for guidance.She looks back.“And I have God in my life now.”A tear
anger.Becky was afraid of being kidnapped and couldn’t sleep at night.
slips down her cheek.
But Donna and Ron patiently guided the girls to help them walk
through some of the issues they faced.
The Wells encouraged the girls to write letters to their parents.
Soon, Donna began writing them as well and they were able to form
a relationship.
“Our heart is for them to still be connected to their family because
She’ll graduate high school next year and is considering a career in
nursing or physical therapy.She is a trainer for her high school football
team, a role she is“absolutely thriving in,”Donna said.
Becky is more outgoing. She’s the first to answer out of the sisters.
She smiles a lot and jokes around but there is pure adoration of her
big sister when she looks at Bridget.
that’s their heart,” Donna said.“Even though they can’t go back with
She likes trying new things, including soccer. Even though she
them, we still try to help them have a relationship with their parents.”
never played a day in her life,she made her high school team this year.
The Wells invite the girls’parents over for holidays and invite them
Becky hopes to go to Steven F.Austin University and become a neona-
to church.Bridget and Becky said they like being able to see their par-
tal nurse.
ents when they’re healthy and doing well.They also help with Ron and
“Ron and Donna see people for who they are,”case manager Kristin
Donna’s nonprofit ministry,“Wells of Agape,” which serves families in
Wilson said.“Their gift of being spiritual mentors has been passed to
Southeast Texas by offering faith-based mentoring,teaching and mod-
Becky and Bridget and now they’re becoming spiritual mentors.When
eling of how God designed marriage and families. A lot of the families
you look on the outside, they’re developing into beautiful young
who attend parenting classes are parents who have had their children
women but on the inside,they’re developing spiritually and becoming
removed. Becky talks about what it’s like to be a foster kid.
who God intended them to be.”
The girls aim high with the help and encouragement of Donna and
Ron. They are quick to offer a compliment and build up the girls by
highlighting their strengths.
“You know, the thing is, they’re grateful,” Donna said.“The difference is these two have chosen to take a bad situation and make the
best of it. It’s their choice. It’s nothing we’ve done. You have to make
those choices for yourself.”
“I’m a proud dad,”Ron followed.“To see where they were and each
step of their lives,the decisions they’ve made … how they react to
those decisions.They make the best of where they’re at.They’re
overcomers. And just seeing them face those obstacles in life
that a lot of us didn’t have to face but they’re able to face them
and move on and to thrive … It just makes me proud.”
A ‘wow’ moment
Several days before the interview, Donna had
one of those ‘wow’ moments that makes you
stop and think.
She took the girls to school early. They were
getting their athletic bags out of the car, talking
to their friends, laughing and playing around.
“They were just so pretty and so grown up
and I saw them walking out with their friends
and it looked like they just fit,” she said. “They
were normal.They are normal.That’s something
they’ve struggled with – foster care defining who
they are. But I tell them all the time, ‘It does not
define who you are.’
“And just seeing them, just being who they
are with their peers, it was so rewarding to me.
I thought to myself, ‘This is amazing.’ To just
see them flourish. They flourish where
they’re at. It was one of those proud
mama moments.”
It was one of those moments
where she sat in her car for a few minutes and just said ‘wow.’
The girls didn’t know that had happened. As Donna told the story, there wasn’t
a dry eye in the room. ■
*Names have been changed to protect the
privacy of the children in this story.
Buckner Today 63
God gave Dean and Sara Rollins
their daughter, Emily – twice.
The first time God gave them Emily was through a Buckner adoption when she was an infant in 1996.They found out shortly after she
was born that she was hearing impaired and would be for her entire
life. But they were more than OK with it.They finally had the daughter
they spent years praying and asking God for.She was healthy and they
were happy.
But when Emily was 3, she contracted an extremely rare, deadly
disease that left her bed-ridden in the intensive care unit for a month.
No one expected her to live.
She had strep throat that December in 1999 and a few days later,
Dean and Sara noticed she was bleeding out of her mouth. So they
rushed her to the hospital to find out she had contracted a rare disease that shut down her kidneys and her liver. Her skin turned a
yellowish-brown color from jaundice.
“The doctors all said,‘no hope;get ready,’”Sara said.“They said people just don’t live through that, as bad as it was.”
“They had us say goodbye to her and everything,”Dean added.
Although she was in a medically-induced coma, little Emily hung
on. The doctors couldn’t believe it and they told the Rollins’ that
every day.
One day, the doctor came in and told them her numbers had im-
As a ninth grader,her favorite subjects are art and science.She loves
proved but warned them about getting overly optimistic. But the
drawing clothes and would love to be a fashion designer one day. Or
numbers kept improving.
a scientist. Or both.
“Long story short, on Jan. 19, a month later, she left the hospital
She’s on the swim team at school and active in the Optimist Club.
with nothing wrong,” Sara said.“The doctors said,‘We did not do this.
She won second place in a contest where she had to talk about“Over-
Only God … Only a miracle from God.’Everything worked perfect.Her
coming Obstacles through Optimism.”She said she talked about all that
liver, her kidneys, everything.”
she’s experienced in her life,the obstacles and how she remains positive.
Her ability to overcome the deadly disease despite the worst odds
“She said she can’t believe now that she’s in high school and that
further proved what Dean and Sara told Buckner Today in 1996: That
she’s learning to drive,” Emily signed as Sara interpreted.“It’s a won-
Emily was ‘made for a special purpose.’ That’s why her middle name,
derful life. My school is the best school in the world.”
Tailor,is spelled with an“i,”not a“y.”The dictionary definition made the
spelling especially significant for them.
Emily was on the homecoming court this year and is currently raising money to go on a class trip to Washington, D.C.
In that first interview, Dean and Sara were not completely sure
As if she didn’t have enough on her plate, she also is very active in
what that purpose was. And they still aren’t. But what’s clear is that
her church’s deaf ministry and the youth ministry. She loves going on
Emily touches the lives of nearly every single person she comes into
mission trips.She went to Kentucky at Christmastime to hand out pres-
contact with.
ents, clothing, food and Bibles. Sara said she worked hard on that trip.
“We knew she was a special kid already but whenever that hap-
They’re gearing up for several more trips throughout the year.
pened and God gave us a miracle beyond explanation … We know
Like a lot of teenage girls, Emily dreams of foreign travels to places
God has a special purpose for her.It’s exciting to wait and see what will
like Paris,Italy and Greece.She wants to attend Gallaudet University in
happen,”Sara said.
Washington, D.C., a top university for the hearing impaired.
One of the sweetest 15-year-olds you will ever meet, she loves her
“Emily has always been the kindest, sweetest little girl, ever since
school, the Tennessee School for the Deaf, her youth group, traveling
she was a newborn baby,” Dean said proudly.“She was just a sweet,
and, like most young teenagers, learning to drive.
easy-going, happy little girl.And she still is.She wakes up happy.Every
Buckner Today 65
day is a good day. And she’s very kind to people.”
“And to other kids at school,”Sara said.“There are a lot of disabled
kids at school and they’ll say,‘Emily was helping them get their lunch’
or she’s always pushing one of the wheelchairs.All the things the teachers are always bragging about,what a good kid you are,”she signed to
Emily and smiled.
The missing piece
Dean and Sara decided to adopt Emily through an open adoption
process after 12 years of marriage.At the same time,both felt God laid
the desire on their heart for a child.They were set in their life together
but they knew something was missing.That something was Emily.
“God touched both of us and we both felt the need to pursue
adopting a child,”Dean said.“And we both were convinced of it at the
same time. So we discussed it and said,‘well, God has put this in our
hearts and He’ll take care of this. But where should we go?’ And we
thought Buckner … I went there and it couldn’t have worked out any
Time marches on
better, even if we’d gotten to choose.”
Six years ago, we introduced Buckner Today readers to Eileen
Porter, a spunky, then-86-year-old World War II veteran who
served in the Women’s Army Corps. She enlisted in 1943, at 23
years old, and served along the East Coast and in Germany.
When she was last featured, Porter spoke of serving in
Giessen, Germany during the Berlin Blockade, her adventure at
an impromptu dinner party with Danish royalty, and her life in
France, Germany and the United States with her late husband of
40 years.
Today, at 92, Porter says she still has a few carryovers of
military discipline in her civilian life. “Being organized,” she
says, is one of the most noticeable habits she’s hung on to. Her
cozy apartment is neat and orderly, and she handles all her finances and tax documents herself. “Everything has its place,”
she says. “One of the things I learned in the Women’s Army
Corps was, ‘Plan your work and work your plan.’ That’s the key
to being organized.”
She moved into assisted living at Westminster Place nearly
five years ago. Before that, she spent more than nine years in
the community’s independent living apartments.
The biggest change since we spoke with her six years ago,
says Porter, is having to slow down physically. It’s definitely a
new thing for her.
“Redheads are not known for their patience,” she says, tapping her head, but it’s something she’s been forced to learn.
“We’re all in the same boat [in assisted living. Everybody has to
be patient with everybody else.”
–Lauren Hollon Sturdy
it off great with Emily’s birthmother. She regularly spent time with
Neither was sure about the idea of an open adoption but they hit
Dean and Sara, and even young Emily as she grew up.They attended
birthing classes and Sara was in the room when Emily was born.
“Her birthmother said, ‘Here’s your little girl’right off the bat,”Dean
said.“She said, ‘You have a daughter.’”
Emily’s birthmother had six children after Emily. She’s met all but
one of her siblings. Her birthmother used to come to their house regularly and attended some of her birthday parties.They’ve lost contact
over the past few years, but hope to talk to her soon.
With Dean’s three children from a previous relationship, Emily has
nine brothers and sisters, which confuses people at school when they
ask how many siblings she has. Most assume she’s an only child.
She loves being a sister to her siblings, especially when it means
traveling to the beach in South Carolina to visit them,as the Rollins did
a few years ago.
‘She’s ours’
The most memorable experience for Dean and Sara from the adoption process, as noted in the first Buckner Today story, remains the
ceremony in the hospital chapel two days after Emily was born.
“We had this ceremony with everyone and then they left, and it
was just us alone with her.We couldn’t believe it was happening, that
we were taking her home,”Dean said.“We thought, ‘This is just unreal,
that we’re going to get to walk out of the hospital with this sweet little baby.’ And that’s exactly what we did.”
Twice. ■
LAST LOOK | PARTING SHOT
Dr. Hall’s favorite photo, in which he plays ‘follow the leader’ with a group of children at Baptist Children’s Center in Nairobi, Kenya, on
a February 2007 Buckner mission trip.
By Ken Hall
E
Buckner International for the next generation.
‘follow the leader.’ Many times I have found myself
Being a follower means I will pray for Albert and all the
surrounded by shy children in locations all over the world. ‘Follow
leadership of Buckner. I commit to be available as a volunteer,
the leader’is a great game to help break the ice and makes you an
advocate and encourager. Linda and I will continue to share our
instant hit with the children. No language is necessary when you
financial resources with Buckner ministries throughout the world.
are willing to be silly with kids.
I have been blessed to have been the fifth president of Buckner,
very child I have ever met quickly grasps the concept of
The game also is a great metaphor for leadership in service for
and each of you has honored me with your trust and support.
Jesus. As I step aside as the leader of Buckner, I hope to be an
The best leaders are those who also know how to follow.Come
excellent follower of our new leader, Dr. Albert Reyes. I am
with me; let us follow Albert Reyes,the sixth president,as he leads
supremely confident that Dr. Reyes is uniquely equipped to lead
Buckner to new heights.
Buckner Today 67
Buckner International
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Buckner International

Transcription

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