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Celebrating Two
Help, help, I’m
being oppressed! Years of Marriage
Merlin Bartz complains that Equality in Iowa
Editorial:
marriage equality makes
heterosexuals “less equal”
On March 9, the Des
Moines Register published an
opinion piece by Iowa state
senator Merlin Bartz (R-IA
6th District) titled “Orwell
could have written script for
Iowa’s Animal Farm.”
In the column, the republican senator compare’s the
plot of George Orwell’s
novella Animal Farm (a fable
retelling the story of the
Senator Merlin Bartz
early 20th-century Russian
revolutions) to same-sex couples being given legal marriage
rights in Iowa.
The main point of the article can be found in the following excerpt:
“Corruptedly [sic] applying equal protection/application
laws, the [Iowa Supreme Court] has effectively created a ‘more
equal’ group of Iowans, who based on self-identification
are awarded special status and privilege not given to the
non-identified.”
The senator does not state what special status or privilege same-sex couples now have, but presumably it is the
right to marry someone of the same gender—a right that
Senator Bartz now has just like every other Iowan. That is, it
is a right the twice-married senator has, should he ever find
himself again unmarried, wanting to get hitched a third time,
and head-over-heels in love with another man…
The column prompted many responses, most from
people who seem to have a firmer grasp on the plot and
background of Animal Farm than does Senator Bartz. One
standout among these is the following letter to the senator
from high-school student Miles Brainard of Mason City:
March 11, 2011
FROM: Miles Brainard, Mason City, Iowa
TO: Merlin Bartz, State Capitol, Des Moines, Iowa
Dear Senator Bartz,
My name is Miles Brainard and I live in Mason City, right
next to your district. This morning, when I was looking at the
news online, I stumbled across a letter you had written to the
TTANIMAL FARM continued page 3
Page 8
Page 11
Our annual “Anniversary Issue” marriage map shows
only a little change since last year. There have, however,
been many developments in that time:
• Three of the seven Iowa Supreme Court justices who ruled
that equal protection was being denied to Iowa’s samesex couples were removed from office in the November
2010 elections.
• A marriage-equality bill in Maryland stalled in the legislature in early March 2011.
• A civil unions bill passed by Hawaii’s legislature was vetoed
in July 2010 by then-Governor Linda Lingle; the bill was
signed in January 2011 by the newly elected governor,
Neil Abercrombie.
• Civil union legislation was passed and signed into law
in Illinois in January 2011, and will go into effect in June
2011.
• In August 2010, California’s Prop 8 was ruled unconstitutional, but remains in effect pending appeal
• In February 2011, President Obama announced that the
Department of Justice will not defend Section 3 of DOMA;
House Speaker John Boehner has claimed that congress
will defend DOMA if the DOJ will not.
Same-sex marriage1
Unions granting rights similar to marriage1,2
Legislation granting limited/enumerated rights1
Same-sex marriages performed elsewhere recognized1
No specific prohibition or recognition of same-sex marriages/unions
Statute bans same-sex marriage
Constitution bans same-sex marriage
Constitution bans same-sex marriage & other same-sex unions
1. May include recent laws or court decisions which have created legal recognition
of same-sex relationships, but which have not entered into effect yet.
2. Same-sex marriage laws in California are complicated
Page 15
Morgan Fairchild: Her Gay Love Story
TTInterview on page 20
What’s Inside:
Section 1: News & Politics
Advertising rates
Iowa News
US News
World News Remarkable by Jonathan Wilson
Creeps of the Week
“Concessions of Love” by Tony E. Hansen
Section 2: Fun Guide
Entertainment Picks for April
Deep Inside Hollywood
Partying Hard: “Joe Jonas Does It By Himself”
The Outfield
Recurring Events, Statewide
Hear Me Out (Music Reviews)
The Gay Wedding Planner
Morgan Fairchild: Her Gay Love Story
Cocktail Chatter
Out of Town: Road-Tripping Across Spain
Book Worm Sez: It’s All Relative
Comics and Crossword Puzzle
Section 3: Community
Council Bluffs Community Alliance Calendar
GOglbt meeting on April 7 at Joslyn
PITCH Wellness Summit, May 13-15, 2011
First Friday Breakfast Club: Good Eats in Elkader
Queeries: LGBT Etiquette by Steven Petrow
Wired That Way: Internet Filters
Inside Out: “Taking Risks” by Ellen Krug
Twenty Questions, a 10-part transgender series
Business Directory
Page 18
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ACCESSline Page 2
APRIL 2011
APRIL 2011
PUBLICATION
INFORMATION
SScontinued from page 1
ANIMAL FARM
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Des Moines Register concerning same-sex
marriage. It is because of this I am writing
to you now.
George Orwell’s Animal Farm is a little
book I hold near and dear to my heart. The
way in which time and forgetfulness may
be used to strip people of their rights is
an important point, and I applaud you for
making it. However, your suggestion that
this is occurring within our state is distressing to me.
In your letter you say, “Gay marriage is
Iowa’s Animal Farm. We, like the animals in
Orwell’s satire, have become the suppressed
beast and fowl, criticized as non-inclusive
uneducated fools. Gay marriage supporters
hope we will, like the duped animals, modify
our memories and stifle our voices in accepting a concept that is completely contradictory
to our constitution’s founders.” I have two
problems with this.
One, you are not being suppressed.
Since same-sex marriage was legalized
in this state, nothing has happened to harm
you or any of your constituents. No one has
had their rights or freedoms violated. No
one has been stolen away in the night by
secret police. No one has been enslaved.
Perhaps what you mean when you say you
have “become the suppressed beast and
fowl,” is that you have been overruled—an
upsetting thing for you. You do not believe
homosexuals, and other non-heterosexuals,
should be fully integrated into society. For
what I assume are religious reasons, you have
decided this minority should not receive the
same legal rights as you, the majority.
You wrote, “The ability to prostitute the
checks and balances of government and set
new precedents is the ultimate hope of those
who advocate that the public should not
have an opportunity to reverse government
decisions inappropriate and counter to long
standing precepts.” You would like to see the
majority vote on what the minority may have
and do. This is not morally defendable and
a shameful position to take. It is exactly the
same sort of thinking which allowed a racist
majority to impose harsh rule over ethnic
minorities up until only recently.
Government exists to represent the
collective will of the people, but it is also
duty bound to shield individuals from the
blunt force of the mob. You, the mob, are not
allowed to bully the minority.
Two, the intents of our founders are
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largely irrelevant.
A great thing about our state constitution, a thing it shares with the national constitution, is the way it is designed for revision.
Times change, and people change with them.
It used to be the case that only rich, white
men could vote or hold office. As we have
progressed as a society, we have matured and
realized that women, non-whites, and people
of little means also deserve a voice.
You may very well be correct our state’s
founders would not approve of same-sex
marriage, fair enough. However, just because
they wrote our government into being does
not make them infallible. They would still
be wrong to think that way, and so are you
and people like you. You say the legalization
of same-sex marriage is “counter to long
standing precepts.” So what? Just because
ideas are tenacious, it does not mean they
are admirable. The amount of time a position
is held does not correlate with the position’s
validity.
”All animals are equal but some animals
are more equal than others.” This line is not
lost on me. In fact, I would ask you to please
take another look at it. Are non-heterosexuals
really attempting to commandeer new, better
rights and raise themselves above the majority of Iowans as an elite class of citizens?
You suggest this group of people “based
on self-identification” desires to be “awarded
special status and privilege not given to the
non-identified.” No, you are wrong, Senator.
This group of people does not want to identify
as being different. They do not want to be
special. What this group of very nice people
wants is be like everyone else. Non-heterosexuals are not greedy, they will not try to
steal equality from anyone. They merely wish
to possess the same equality as everyone else,
nothing more—but nothing less.
Sincerely,
Miles Brainard
ACCESSline Page 3
“All of my life I’ve spent
a lot of time with gay men—
Montgomery Clift, Jimmy Dean,
Rock Hudson—who are my
colleagues, coworkers, confi—
dantes, my closest friends, but I
never thought of who they slept
with! They were just the people I
loved. I could never understand
why they couldn’t be afforded
the same rights and protections
as all of the rest of us. There
is no gay agenda, it’s a human
agenda. All of us should be
treated the same… Why shouldn’t
gay people be allowed to marry?
Those against gay marriages say
marriage should only be between
a man and a woman. God, I, of all
people know that [the remainder
of the sentence was inaudible
due to an audience outburst]. I
feel that any home where there
is love constitutes a family and
all families should have the
same legal rights, including the
right to marry and have or adopt
children!”
—Actress and activist, Elizabeth
Taylor, at GLAAD’s 11th Annual
Media Awards, April 15, 2000.
Rest in peace.
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ACCESSline Page 4
APRIL 2011
Former Supreme Court
One Iowa’s Carolyn Jenison
Justices To Be Honored At
takes on new project
Annual ACLU Dinner, April 30
The ACLU Foundation of Iowa is proud to
announce that the 2011 Louise Noun Award
will be presented to the three former Iowa
Supreme Court justices Marsha Ternus, David
Baker, and Michael Streit.
They were removed by voters last
November in the wake of the Iowa Supreme
Court’s 2009 historic ruling supporting
marriage equality and will be honored at the
ACLU Foundation of Iowa annual dinner on
Saturday, April 30. The Louise Noun Award,
named after the remarkable former president of the ACLU of Iowa, goes to those who
have made significant contributions to civil
liberties in the state.
The keynote speaker will be Des Moines
attorney Sharon Malheiro, a leading advocate
in lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered
(LGBT) issues. Malheiro founded and is the
chair of One Iowa, the largest statewide civil
rights organization dedicated to LGBT issues
in Iowa. She has been a significant leader
in achieving same-sex marriage equality in
this state.
A former journalist, Malheiro joined the
Davis Brown law firm 1990 and is the president of the firm’s board of directors.
Soon after joining the firm, Malheiro
started working on LGBT issues. She worked
to amend Des Moines’ human rights ordinance to include protections for gay and
lesbian people. She also worked to introduce
the Iowa Safe Schools legislation, and to
add a LGBT amendment to the Iowa Civil
Rights Act.
Dinner and the program will be held at
the University Athletic Club on the campus
of the University of Iowa. We look forward to
seeing you in IOwa City on April 30!
Whenever there is a significant advance
in civil liberties, there is also the acompanying push-back. Iowa’s tremendous gains in
marriage equality are no exception. And the
ACLU of Iowa is fighting efforts to erode civil
martial equality in our state.
Ever since April 2009, when the Iowa
Supreme Court unanimously ruled in Varnum
v. Brien that marriage equality is a right for
all Iowans, anti-gay groups have fought to
tear down that decision.
In recent months, the ACLU of Iowa’s
activities have included:
Fighting Iowa House Joint Resolution 6,
which would amend the Iowa Constitution
to repeal the state’s marriage equality law
and deny any form of legal recognition for
gay couples-even mere civil unions. We have
spoken out against this in the media and will
fight in the legislature.
Issuing a joint press release with One
Iowa and the Interfaith Alliance of Iowa to
oppose a proposed “marriage discrimination
bill”. It proposed permitting discrimination
against same-sex and other married couples
based on a “sincerely held” religious belief.
Along with many other groups, we fought
the bill legislatively.
The ACLU also was highly visible in the
media coverage surrounding the bill. In fact,
Executive Director Ben Stone directly took
on the governor on a WHO-TV evening news
segment. Fortunately, the next day the bill
was withdrawn.
The bill was so attrocious that Salon.
com included it in an article on the nine most
stupid bills introduced in state legislatures
this year. It’s titled “Tea Partyers Gone Wild”
and includes a statement from the ACLU of
Iowa.
Protesting a movement to impeach the
remaining Iowa Supreme Court justices in
retaliation for their Varnum ruling. We were
one of the first to decry the impeachment
movement, issuing a press release that was
widely used, and then fought legislatively.
Condemning Bob Vander Plaats’ call for
resignation of the remaining justices. “This
does nothing to promote good government
or the quality of justice in Iowa. Instead, it
suggest suggests a desire for revenge,” said
Stone at the time.
Filing a friend of court brief in late
December against a lawsuit that attempted
to change the way Iowa judges are selected.
The suit was filed on behalf of four Iowans
by the Bopp law firm of Indiana. We were the
only group to file a friend of court brief, which
asked that the court not grant the emergency
request of this divisive group. The following
month, the lawsuit was thrown out by the
federal judge.
Remaining active in the coalition we
helped found last fall-Justice Not Politics.
JNP works to maintain our current process
of judicial selection and retention and to
prevent judges from having to solicit funding
for an election process.
Dear friends,
When I joined One Iowa
four years ago, we were small
but mighty, with three staff and
roughly 1,000 supporters. But
we reached out, we engaged
volunteers, we shared our
stories, we encouraged others
and our support grew to more
than 40,000. And, in that time,
I was blessed to have witnessed our state
embrace LGBT civil rights, institute policies to
protect our children from bullying in school,
and in 2009, see my home become the third
state in the nation to guarantee the freedom
to marry for gay and lesbian couples.
Over these past four years, One Iowa
has truly become the collective voice for
many who didn’t have one. Now, as One Iowa
is set to begin a new phase and a renewed
commitment to public education, I believe
this is the time to bring in new leadership
to carry on our success.
I am proud to have played a part in
making history and I am excited to pass the
torch on to someone ready to help write the
next chapter for equality, because One Iowa’s
work is far from over. Although our fight will
continue under the Golden Dome, we have to
reach out to the hearts and minds of Iowans
in towns and cities throughout
the state.
I will be embracing a
new opportunity as Director
of Community Relations for
Iowans for Social & Economic
Development. Our Political Director, Troy Price, will
assume the role of Interim
Executive Director. I know,
because of the abilities and commitment
of our staff and our board of directors, our
organization will continue to not only remain
strong, and grow stronger moving into this
next phase.
This has been the most challenging and
meaningful experience in my career. It has
been an honor to work alongside this staff,
board and volunteers who are the most
dedicated and giving people I have met, and
I want to thank you for all of your support
and guidance over the past four years. And
now, I look forward to continued friendship
and sharing One Iowa’s continued successes
from a different vantage point. Please join me
in continuing to support one Iowa’s work,
and I’ll see you at the Anniversary Bash
on April 2!
My best to you always,
Carolyn
ACLU Of Iowa Continues To
Fight For Marriage Equality Adam Bouska and Jeff Parshley
“What do I say to the idea that [DOMA] is a wedge issue? I say ‘Hallelujah.’ The
fact that we’ve now evolved to the point where the Republicans are complaining about
the fact that we introduced this bill because it causes them political problems is a great
sign of progress. It used to be the other way around.”
— U.S. Rep. Barney Frank (D-MA) when asked on March 16 about the new effort by
house democrats to repeal the discriminatory Defense of Marriage Act.
to Headline 2011 Awards Dinner
NOH8 Campaign Founders Adam
Bouska and Jeff Parshley will headline
the 2011 Matthew Shepard Scholarship
Awards Dinner on June 3, 2011.
The NOH8 Campaign is a photographic
silent protest created in direct response
to the passage of Proposition 8 in California. Photos feature subjects with duct
tape over their mouths, symbolizing their
voices being silenced by Prop 8 and similar
legislation around the world, with “NOH8”
painted on one cheek in protest.
Two years since its inception, the
NOH8 Campaign has grown to over 8,000
faces and continues to grow at an exponential rate. The campaign began with
portraits of everyday Californians from
all walks of life and soon rose to include
politicians, military personnel, newlyweds,
law enforcement, artists, celebrities, and
many more.
The Awards Dinner is Friday, June 3, 2011,
at 5:30pm at the Hy-Vee Conference Center in
West Des Moines. More information is available at mssdinner.eychanerfoundation.org.
APRIL 2011
ACCESSline Page 5
US NEWS news analysis by Rex Wockner
DOMA repeal bills
introduced in Congress
Bills were introduced in both houses of
the U.S. Congress on March 16 to repeal the
Clinton-era Defense of Marriage Act.
The act prohibits the federal government from recognizing states’ same-sex
marriages and gives states cover to
refuse to recognize each other’s same-sex
marriages.
The federal-recognition part of the act
recently was deemed unconstitutional by
President Barack Obama and the Justice
Department, which has stopped defending
that portion of the act in a series of ongoing
federal lawsuits.
At the same time, the department
declared that any discrimination based
on sexual orientation, like discrimination
based on race or religion, is automatically
unconstitutional absent some important
governmental need for treating gay people
differently.
The DOMA-repeal bill, called the
Respect for Marriage Act, might not see
a floor vote in either chamber this year,
though it is likely to proceed further in
the Senate, which is controlled by Democrats.
It was introduced in the House by
Reps. Jerry Nadler, John Conyers, Barney
Frank, Tammy Baldwin, Jared Polis and
David Cicilline, the latter four of whom are
openly gay. It was introduced in the Senate
by Dianne Feinstein, Patrick Leahy and
Kirsten Gillibrand. In the House, Minority
Leader Nancy Pelosi and Minority Whip
Steny Hoyer are among the measure’s more
than 100 sponsors.
Joe Solmonese. Photo by Rex Wockner.
“The debate over DOMA isn’t about
whether you favor marriage equality, it’s
about whether the government can pick
and choose which marriages they like,
and which they don’t,” said Human Rights
Campaign President Joe Solmonese. “With
five states and D.C. granting marriage
licenses to same-sex couples, it’s time the
federal government stops playing favorites
and instead creates an equal playing field
for all families.”
“In 1996, DOMA was just hypothetical discrimination because every state
excluded same-sex couples from marriage,”
Solmonese added. “Today we see it in much
more concrete terms -- as tangible, heartwrenching, real-life discrimination.”
DOMA deprives married same-sex
couples of some 1,100 federal marriage
rights and benefits -- including Social Security survivor benefits, federal employee
spousal health coverage, protections
against spouses’ losing their homes during
medical emergencies, the right to sponsor
a foreign partner for immigration, and the
ability to file a joint tax return.
National Center for Lesbian Rights
Executive Director Kate Kendell said
repealing DOMA “will correct a shameful
low point in our nation’s history.”
“DOMA was passed in a moment of
ugly anti-gay bigotry,” she said. “Every day
that it stays on the books, DOMA harms
families, stigmatizes our relationships and
perpetuates a climate of hostility for all
LGBT people.”
Lambda Legal’s Marriage Project
director, Jennifer Pizer, said her group “has
heard from countless married same-sex
couples who, because of DOMA, must pay
extra federal income taxes on health insurance, are denied essential family benefits
through Social Security, endure wrenching
separation if one spouse is not an American
citizen, and face a host of other injustices
large and small.”
“DOMA did something never done
before in U.S. history,” Pizer said. “It said
the federal government will pretend that
an entire class of legally married couples
is not really married due to other people’s
religious or moral views about them, or
because they don’t fit how a declining
number of people envision ‘family.’”
Rea Carey. Photo by Rex Wockner.
National Gay and Lesbian Task Force
Executive Director Rea Carey said, “It is
shocking that in 21st-century America,
legally married same-sex couples are
being singled out and selectively denied
fundamental rights by their own federal
government.”
A recent nationwide poll by Greenberg
Quinlan Rosner Research, paid for by HRC,
found that 51 percent of voters oppose
DOMA and 34 percent support it.
Same-sex marriage is legal in Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire,
Vermont and Washington, D.C. In addition,
same-sex marriages from anywhere in
the world are recognized as marriages in
Maryland, New Mexico, New York, Rhode
Island and California (if the marriage took
place before Proposition 8 passed) even
though those states do not let same-sex
couples marry.
Majority of Americans
support same-sex
marriage
Another national poll has found that a
majority of Americans now support samesex marriage.
The Washington Post-ABC News poll,
released March 18, found that when asked,
“Do you think it should be illegal or legal
for gay and lesbian couples to get married?”
53 percent of adults said “legal” and 44
percent said “illegal.”
The random telephone poll quizzed
1,005 people and has a margin of sampling
error of plus or minus 3.5 percentage
points.
Recent CNN and AP polls also found
majority support for same-sex marriage.
“Americans have been on a journey of
understanding, living up to the American
value of treating others as we would all
want to be treated, and staying true to our
nation’s history of upholding the American promise of equality under the law,”
said Evan Wolfson, president of Freedom
to Marry. “When the so-called Defense
of Marriage Act was stampeded through
in 1996, only 26 percent of Americans
supported the freedom to marry. In the
15 years since, that support has more than
doubled.”
Chad Griffin, board president of the
American Foundation for Equal Rights,
said: “The trend captured by today’s Washington Post-ABC News poll -- and a variety
of other surveys -- is indisputable. The more
Americans talk about this issue with one
another, the more they come to embrace the
idea that all citizens deserve equal rights,
including the freedom to marry. As AFER
has witnessed in its case to overturn Prop
8, people from all political persuasions and
walks of life believe that adults in committed, loving relationships should be able to
live their lives free from the government’s
interference.”
No same-sex marriage
this year for Maryland
Maryland was widely expected to
become the next U.S. state to legalize
same-sex marriage but the plan crashed
and burned March 11.
The bill to legalize gay marriage had
passed the Senate and had the governor’s
support, but, at the last minute, after
almost three hours of debate in the House
of Delegates, supporters realized they did
not have the votes there.
The bill then was returned to committee by a voice vote.
According to one report, key House
opponents included African American
legislators from Prince George’s County
and conservative Democrats from the
Baltimore area and the southern part of
the state.
“While we are disappointed the House
did not vote to pass marriage equality
today, we are confident we will win in the
future,” Equality Maryland said in a statement. “It is best to delay this historic vote
until we are absolutely sure we have the
votes to win.”
TTUS NEWS continued page 10
ACCESSline Page 6
APRIL 2011
World News news analysis by Rex Wockner
Moldovan anti-discrimi—
nation bill under attack
A government-supported bill to ban
anti-gay and other discrimination has come
under attack in Moldova’s Parliament,
where it is being debated.
According to ILGA-Europe, a number of
MPs have called for the deletion of “sexual
orientation” from the draft law after being
encouraged to do so by “right wing American
evangelicals.”
On March 17, about 150 anti-gay activists staged a protest outside Parliament
dubbed “Homosexuals stay at home.”
Said ILGA: “Aggressive homophobic
rhetoric by religious organizations and a
number of parliamentarians already resulted in threats being made to the members
of GenderDoc-M, the leading Moldovan
LGBTI rights organization. Alexei Marcicov,
president of the organization, was verbally
abused and had stones thrown at him near
his home. Other human rights defenders
supporting the anti-discrimination law
have been threatened on the streets and
near their homes.”
ILGA-Europe’s board co-chair, Martin
K.I. Christensen, said Moldova has little
choice but to pass the bill with gays
included.
“Moldova committed to passing an antidiscrimination law protecting all minorities
under its visa-liberalization agreement with
the European Union,” he said. “We call on the
EU to assert its position with the Moldovan
authorities and hold them accountable
under their obligations.”
ILGA-Europe is the European Region
of ILGA, the International Lesbian, Gay,
Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Association.
St. Lucia apologizes
to gay Americans
The Caribbean island of St. Lucia on
March 11 apologized to three American
gay men who were violently attacked and
robbed inside a vacation villa by assailants
who called them faggots.
The apology from the tourism minister
came after one of the victims, Michael Baker,
posted a graphic account of the nightmarish incident on his Facebook page—tinyurl.
com/luc-attac.
Tourism Minister Allen Chastanet said:
“Whether or not this crime was motivated
by anti-gay sentiment, or during the course
of a robbery, it is nonetheless unacceptable
behavior and Saint Lucia as a destination will not tolerate it. … Saint Lucia has
always been a safe destination, respectful
of people’s own choices for religion, beliefs
and perspectives on life.”
In his lengthy Facebook recounting of
the attack, Baker writes: “He pointed the gun
at my head and said, ‘Get the f--k down!’ As
I sat down on the ground the door crashed
open, and I put my head between my knees.
I wondered if it was going to hurt to die by
being shot in the head. I felt so trapped. I
wanted to run away with Nick, get him out
of there, but there was nowhere to escape.
This was going to be it. … They began to
kick me in the back and the side. I was on
my side, looking at Nick’s face. I could feel
warm water running down my back, and
realized it was not water, it was blood. I saw
the blood flowing out of my forearm. They
began to tell us that they hated white people.
They hated faggots. They asked where we
were from. We told them the United States.
They told us again how much they hated
us. They asked if we were gay. Why had
we showered together? Todd and I both
said it was because the water heater was
so small. They said if we were faggots they
would kill us.”
According to the U.S. State Department’s latest human-rights report on St.
Lucia: “The law criminalizes homosexual
relations, and there was widespread social
discrimination against lesbians, gays, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) persons in the
deeply conservative society. There were few
openly LGBT persons in the country.”
from religious bigotry. Activists on the island
itself and the rest of the UK launched a
campaign to get the law changed and I am
proud to have played a part in this.”
Front-runner for
Peruvian president
supports civil unions
The front-runner in Peru’s presidential
campaign, Alejandro Toledo, has expressed
support for giving gay couples the rights
of marriage via civil unions. The election
is April 10.
Gaga censored in Malaysia
Restrictions on the rights of vulnerable groups face the highest level of court
scrutiny and are presumed to be illegal from
the get-go.
The court said, “The mere presence of
a HIV-positive individual in a country is not
in itself a threat to public health.”
Russia was found to have violated Article
8 of the European Convention on Human
Rights, which concerns right to family life, and
Article 14, which bans discrimination.
Last October, the Euro Court ruled
against Russia in the matter of Moscow’s
ongoing bans of gay pride events.
The court found that the nation violated
guarantees of the European Convention in the
areas of freedom of assembly and association,
right to an effective remedy and prohibition
of discrimination.
Guyana keeps gay sex ban,
opposes discrimination
Sexual-orientation state—
ment to be delivered at UN
The government of the South American nation of Guyana said March 10 that it
opposes both anti-gay discrimination and
advocacy of gay “lifestyles.”
Gay activists called the statement
inadequate and said that if the government
wanted to lessen anti-gay discrimination,
it should repeal laws that ban gay sex and
cross-dressing.
The ban on cross-dressing is being challenged at present in the Supreme Court on
constitutional grounds.
A joint statement recognizing human
rights violations based on sexual orientation
and gender identity will be delivered at the
United Nations Human Rights Council on
March 21. The deadline for countries to sign
onto it is March 18.
At present, 58 nations have endorsed the
statement. Gay activists who are involved in
U.N. affairs are urging colleagues around the
world to lobby their national governments
to sign up.
Among the nations being targeted are
Bosnia and Herzegovina, Moldova, Turkey
and Ukraine.
The statement will be read out by the
U.N.’s ambassador from Colombia.
Canada inserts gays
into citizenship guide
Canada has added a gay sentence to
“Discover Canada,” the nation’s official citizenship study guide.
According to the national LGBT lobby
group Egale, the sentence says, “Canada’s
diversity includes gay and lesbian Canadians, who enjoy the full protection of and
equal treatment under the law, including
access to civil marriage.”
Egale criticized the guide for making no
mention of transgender people, and urged
Parliament to pass pending Bill C-389, which
adds “gender identity” and “gender expression” as prohibited grounds of discrimination in the Canadian Human Rights Act and
adds transphobic crimes to the Criminal
Code’s hate-crimes list.
Isle of Man passes
civil-partnership law
A same-sex civil-partnership law has
passed the parliament of the Isle of Man, a
self-governing British crown dependency
in the Irish Sea between Great Britain and
Ireland.
The law, which takes effect April 6,
includes all the rights and obligations of
marriage, the same as the United Kingdom’s
civil-partnership law.
British gay activist George Broadhead
commented: “As a Manxman myself who
was born on the IOM in 1933 and realized I
was gay at school in the 1940s, I know only
too well what a frightful homophobic place
it was—much of it stemming, as elsewhere,
Lady Gaga. Photo by Rex Wockner
Malaysia’s largest chain of non-government-owned radio stations has removed gay
lyrics from Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way” for
fear of being fined by government censors.
The words “No matter gay, straight or bi,
lesbian, transgendered life, I’m on the right
track, baby, I was born to survive” have been
garbled so as to be unintelligible.
Italian PM: Gay unions
will be kept at lower level Euro Parliament warns
Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi Turkey, Montenegro on
said Feb. 26, “As long as we are in power,
traditional marriage and gay unions will gay equality
never be on the same level.”
The national LGBT group Arcigay
denounced the remark as “another ruthless
use of homosexuals and transsexuals’ lives
and feelings with the sole objective of restoring the alliance with the Catholic electorate,
disgusted by months of sexual scandals.”
“The prime minister should look around
and tell us which countries are treating LGBT
people like he does,” said the group’s president, Paolo Patanè. “Maybe he will find out
that this does not happen anywhere in the
civilized world.”
Euro Court rules against
Russia in HIV case
The European Court of Human Rights
ruled March 10 that Russia violated the European Convention on Human Rights when it
denied a residence permit to a man from
Uzbekistan because he is HIV-positive.
The man is married to a Russian woman
and they have a child together.
The ruling created European legal precedent in two ways: It recognized HIV-positive
people as a distinct group whose fundamental rights are protected from discrimination,
and it elevated HIV-positive people to the
status of a “vulnerable group with a history
of prejudice and stigmatisation.”
Ulrike Lunacek. File photo
Adopting resolutions on Turkey’s and
Montenegro’s progress toward joining the
European Union, the European Parliament
on March 9 told both nations they will have
to do better on LGBT equality if they want to
be part of the EU.
Turkey must “ensure that equality,
regardless of sex … or sexual orientation,
is guaranteed by the law and effectively
TTWORLD NEWS continued page 34
APRIL 2011
Remarkable by Jonathan Wilson
Mob Rule is Democracy
Fit for the Toilet
The immediate-term wishes of the
majority of us, versus the right thing to
do: these are not always the same thing. I
remember reading about a small town that
decided in favor of more direct democracy
and had citizens voting with their toilets.
Those favoring a proposal were told to flush
their toilets at a particular time, and those
opposing it were told to flush at a different time. The greater drop in the water
tower level would decide it. Aside from the
obvious infirmities of no voter registration,
no way to adjust for those with multiple
toilets, and the potential for someone to
“vote” with a nearby fire hydrant, it did
eliminate the middleman, so to speak.
Ours is a representative democracy;
there is a middle-man or -woman. Every
elected official in a representative form of
democracy must strike a balance between
voting what he/she perceives to be the will
of constituents on the one hand, and doing
the right thing on the other. In the latter case
they must take on the burden of explaining
successfully to constituents why what they
did was the right thing to do. If they’re to get
re-elected—which is the foremost agenda
of most folks holding elective office—they
need to do that successfully before the next
election or rely heavily on short public
memory. Too many opt for neither of those
and act more like gumball machines, doing
in automaton fashion what they think is the
majority’s immediate short-term will.
Some issues afford elected representatives more latitude in striking the balance
when, being better informed on specifics,
they find there’s some degree of disconnect
between the right thing and the majority
will. In those cases, fair minds can easily
differ on where the balance should to be
struck. No one with a modicum of humility can say confidently who is right and
who is wrong in those instances. Striking
the balance then is never a test of either
conscience or courage.
On issues of human rights, however,
there is less latitude and, in fact, there
should be a presumption in favor of striking
the balance in favor of human rights. And
issues of human rights invariably call for
both conscience and courage.
When I was growing, up I remember
seeing western movies that depicted a
sheriff (read: a unanimous Iowa Supreme
Court) standing up to a lynch mob to
protect an accused prisoner. Just imagine
how un-heroic (and unacceptable) it would
have been in those movies for the sheriff,
in the end, to say indifferently that, since a
lynching was the will of his constituents,
have at it.
In 1931, in northwest Iowa during
the height of the depression, a judge was
confronted by a mob that was angry about
his signing foreclosure decrees, and the mob
wanted him to stop. He refused, standing in
favor of law and order—the right thing to
do. After torturing him, the mob dragged
him to the outskirts of town with the intent
of lynching him. They stopped only when
the local newspaper editor intervened to
remind them they’d be guilty of murder.
Which is not to say that the majority doesn’t eventually get whatever issue
figured out appropriately. After a decade of
polling, for example, according to a recent
ABC News/Washington Post poll, a majority of Americans now favor gay marriage.
When it comes to equal rights guaranteed
by the Constitution, however, a minority
shouldn’t have to wait that long for the
majority to come up with the right conclusion. It’s necessary for judges to do their
job, and elected officials to back them up, if
Constitutional guarantees are to have any
meaning.
The theocratic mob of today is made
up principally of self-styled “Christians.”
It’s ironic that Christians trace one of the
foundations of the faith to the wrongful
actions of a mob that turned on Jesus and
prompted his crucifixion. Now just over
2,000 years later it’s the “Christian” mob
at work, and the martyrs who showed both
conscience and courage were three ousted
Iowa Supreme Court Justices.
In that toilet democracy and a close
call, the issue could be decided by those
who are indifferent to the outcome and just
happened to be sitting on the toilet relieving
themselves. In martyring those justices in
the retention election, those who sat it out
decided it. To paraphrase Martin Luther
King, Jr., “In the end, we remember not the
words of our enemies, but the silence and
inaction of our supposed friends who let
the indifferent decide.”
ACCESSline Page 7
Does Hate Speech Spawn
Violence? (Or, Put
Another Way: Do you
Believe in Democracy or
Don’t You?)
Sarah Palin, Rush Limbaugh, Glenn
Beck, Rick Santorum, Tony Perkins, Scott
Lively, and their ilk, insist that they have
no responsibility for violence committed
against their political opponents and others
that they demonize—particularly gay children of God.
Let’s see if the following makes logical
sense: If you believe in democracy, you
believe in free speech; if you believe in free
speech, you believe words matter, minds
can be changed, and behaviors can be
influenced with the force of things spoken
in the public arena; if you believe that words
matter in those ways, you must believe that
hateful speech can increase the chance of
violent behavior toward a target minority
or individual by folks who are prone to
violence; and, therefore, if you believe in
democracy, you believe that hate mongers
breed violence.
When Sarah Palin called for Representative Giffords to be put in the cross-hairs,
graphically demonstrated on her website…
Well, it doesn’t take a genius…
To Cuba With Love And
Back Again
The story is told about a guy who gets
lost and stops to ask a local for directions
to his destination. After a long pause, the
local responds, “Well, I don’t think you can
get there from here.” For over half a century
that has been much the case for Americans
wanting to travel to Cuba. Even now it’s
not easy.
Cuba lies south of Florida about 90
miles. The Castro Regime came to power
after a violent revolution over fifty years
ago. So Cuba and the United States share
a revolutionary history. The United States
sponsored embargo of Cuba has been in
place ever since their revolution. As far as I
know, no other country honors the embargo.
Can you imagine England maintaining a selfdefeating embargo of the American colonies
for half a century after our revolution?!
Reminds me of the kid in the playground
who, wanting his own way, threatens to
hold his breath until he turns blue. Go for
it. Despite the embargo, the economic plight
of the Cuban people, from all appearances,
was as good as I’ve seen things in Mexico,
Belize, Ecuador, and Peru.
More recently the embargo has been
slowly easing, and that fact created the
legal basis for my trip there last month. To
get there required flights to Canada bookending a round trip flight booked between
Toronto and Havana that happens daily.
It couldn’t be accomplished on-line with
a single booking from and back to Des
Moines. Moreover, I felt like a mobile ATM
since credit cards issued by US banks cannot
be used in Cuba, so I had to carry cash—
Canadian cash—stowed in pouches around
my waist, around my ankle, and around my
neck. I felt like a cash stuffed scare crow,
Jonathan Wilson is an attorney at the
Davis Brown Law Firm in Des Moines,
and chairs the First Friday Breakfast Club
(ffbciowa.org), an educational, non-profit
corporation for gay men in Iowa who
gather on the first Friday of every month
to provide mutual support, to be educated
on community affairs, and to further
educate community opinion leaders with
more positive images of gay men. It is the
largest breakfast club in the state of Iowa.
He can be contacted at JonathanWilson@
DavisBrownLaw.com or 515-288-2500.
but I managed and never felt at any more
risk of a mugging than during a walk around
downtown Des Moines.
I think I can say with confidence
that the place is crawling with gay men.
I don’t know about lesbians because my
gaydar doesn’t work with lesbians. But it
was going off aplenty with numerous handsome men that I saw there. I met a charming
gay couple, one a successful architect and his
partner, an accomplished, bilingual guide.
They shared some fascinating insights about
the Cuban experience and culture, and they
confirmed that homosexuality, while not
protected, is quite common and mostly
accepted.
Perhaps the most interesting insight
was about the embargo which, if it’s been
intended to put pressure on the Castro
Regime, has been decidedly counter-productive. I was told that, since the beginning,
every perceived short-coming of the Castro
Regime has been conveniently blamed on
what?—the US embargo. That scapegoat
has given the Regime cover for everything
from the shortage of milk, meat, bread, and
cement, to opportunity … I was also told that
lifting the embargo would likely change the
political dynamics in Cuba almost overnight.
Without that excuse for deficient performance, there would be tremendous pressure
on the Cuban Government for change—not
unlike the pressure we’ve seen recently in
the Arab world.
The accommodations were flawless,
both the hotels and food, as well as an
abundance of taxi cabs. Havana, at least,
is ready and set for the American tourism
that will cascade there when the embargo
is finally lifted. They won’t have to start
from scratch to accommodate the visitors. Except for the hurricane season, the
weather is also flawless. The people are
wonderfully friendly, particularly to those
few Americans who have been able to visit
despite the embargo.
And did I mention the plethora of
gorgeous gay men?
ACCESSline Page 8
APRIL 2011
Creep of the Week by D’Anne Witkowski
Victoria Jackson
Victoria Jackson at a Tea Party rally in
Pasadena, California. Photo: Shal Farley
I used to love Saturday Night Live when
I was a kid. By far one of my favorite cast
members was Victoria Jackson. I thought she
was hilarious. Granted, she mostly played the
same ditzy blonde character in every skit, but
she did it well.
When Jackson left the show in 1992 I
remember feeling disappointed. I was positive
SNL just wouldn’t be the same without her. And,
of course, it wasn’t, but my allegiance was with
the show, not with Jackson. And it wasn’t long
before I lost track of her.
Fast forward almost two decades later. I
hadn’t even thought of Victoria Jackson in years.
In fact, if you would have asked me if she was
even still alive I would have been unable to
answer that question.
But she’s alive all right. And, it turns out,
completely insane.
On March 18, “The Muslims next door,” a
column by Tea Party Princess Jackson, appeared
on World Net Daily, the Internet’s go-to source
for right-wing ranting and raving about homosexuality. Granted, Jackson’s piece is, as the title
indicates, about Muslims, but she manages to
get some anti-gay jabs in there as well (I suspect
that’s editorial policy at WND).
“Why do liberals embrace Islam knowing
it frowns on homosexuality?” Jackson writes.
“Because they have the same goals. Progressives, communists, liberals, globalists and
Muslims want to destroy America. When that
goal is reached, they will fight for top billing.
It will be bloody.”
Ah, yes. The great race to destroy the
country and then beat the s--t out of each other.
She’s on to us. Granted, I don’t know where
we’re going to live once our shared dream of
destruction is realized. Probably Canada.
I should point out that Jackson’s criteria for
“embracing Islam” simply means the opposite
of denouncing Islam. So basically if you don’t
hate something then that means you love it.
And probably want to gay-marry it. Very logically sound.
And so her thinking goes throughout her
column. It’s rambling and full of sweeping
generalizations and unsupported claims. At
times she tries to be funny, but really she just
comes across as a hateful person.
“Frankly, I’m afraid to say anything about
Muslims. Why? Because they kill people,” she
writes. “I try to stay away from violence, and I
wouldn’t even be thinking about Islam except
that they keep jumping in front of my face. No less readily available. Often those making protection of the laws to deny homosexuals
one talked about Islam when I grew up. How the argument will resort to argumentative their first choice of marital partner, why
did they all suddenly appear in America?”
fallacies to back up their claims. The problem would it not do the same to deny pedophiles,
Good question. How did they “all suddenly is, there are so many fallacious arguments to polygamists, or the incestuous the right
appear in America?” Surely there weren’t choose from, it’s hard to keep it all straight. to marry the person (or persons) of their
choice?”
Muslims here back in the ‘60s and ‘70s when Pardon the pun.
“The Top Ten Harms for
Okay, wait. Did he
Jackson was a kid. I mean, it’s not like Islam
Well, the Family
is one of the largest religions in the world or Research Council’s Peter Same-Sex ‘Marriage’“ is hot off just say that not letting
get married denies
anything. So there’s really just no telling how Sprigg has just the thing
the presses, and it’s filled with gays
them “their first choice
they managed to get some of their people on for you. “The Top Ten
U.S. soil right under Jackson’s nose.
Harms for Same-Sex all of the half-truths, cherry- of marital partner?”
All Muslims are up to no good in Jackson’s ‘Marriage’“ is hot off picked statistics and outright As if there’s a perfectly
partner of
eyes. She writes, “Why can’t the ‘good, peace- the presses and it’s
lies a person needs to argue acceptable
the opposite sex just
ful’ Muslims denounce the actions of the ‘bad, filled with all of the halfviolent’ Muslims? I’m Baptist, and I denounce truths, cherry-picked that God made Adam and Eve, waiting in the wings?
That’s not how it works.
the actions of the Westboro Baptist Church. statistics, manipulated not Adam and Steve.
Nor is being gay the
They are not living the way Jesus taught—but data, distortion, and
the opposite. Maybe, just maybe the ‘good’ outright lies a person needs to argue that God same thing as being incestuous or being a
pedophile or a polygamist.
Muslims approve of what the ‘bad’ Muslims are made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.
To sum up his additional “harms,” Sprigg
doing! Maybe they are celebrating it, funding
Sprigg separates the harms by “Immeit and cheering them on.”
diate effects” (1-4) and “Long term effects” argues that if gays get married, then heterosexuIt’s strange that Jackson seems to be (5-10). Immediate effects include the trash- als will stop getting married so they can screw
completely unaware of the multitude of Muslims ing of religious liberties (i.e. the freedom around or get married and screw around anyway
who condemn violence. The majority of them, to discriminate against gays and lesbians and then get divorced and die alone. Regardless,
even. Maybe, just maybe she needs to read because God tells you to) and teaching grade heterosexuals will stop having kids. Apparently
only gays will get married and all children will
something other than World Net Daily. And school kids to be gay.
before we give her too much credit for denouncThe number one immediate harm be intentionally brought into this world without
ing the Westboro Baptist
caused by gays getting the love of a mom and a dad. Does that sound
Church, don’t forget that
Jackson’s piece is about married is the bilking realistic to you? Probably not, but why let that
she doesn’t like gays one Muslims, but she manages to of taxpayer dollars to stop us? Sprigg has raised the bar high for
bit. Especially, it seems,
“subsidize homosexual homosexual domination. It would be a shame
get some anti-gay jabs in there relationships.” And just to disappoint him.
not the gleeful ones.
“Did you see ‘Glee’ as well (I suspect that’s edito— what are gays so shamethis week?” she writes. rial policy at WND).
lessly asking for? Social
“Sickening! And, besides
Security benefits for
shoving the gay thing down our throats, they their partners and their kids if they die. That’s
made a mockery of Christians—again! I wonder right, same-sex couples want to help protect
what their agenda is? Hey, producers of ‘Glee’— their families by receiving benefits from a
what’s your agenda? One-way tolerance?”
system that they themselves have paid into
Granted, I don’t watch “Glee,” but I know all of their working lives. In other words, gays
that there was a kiss between two boys on are today’s Cadillac-driving welfare queens.
the show. Perhaps, for the sake of “balance,” Talk about piglets at the public teat.
someone should have beaten the s--t out of those
It’s a strange complaint considering that
two fags on the same episode. You know, a nod Sprigg also argues that gays don’t stay togethto all of the tender-hearted Christians out there er anyway and that they don’t bother getting
offended by a boy kissing another boy.
married even when it is legal. He seems to
Remember, when you kiss a homo you do be claiming that legalized marriage really
it for Satan. But when you sucker punch one, isn’t something that gays want since all gay
you’re doing it for Jesus.
people aren’t legally married in places where
it’s legal to do so. Sprigg points specifically
to California, where same-sex marriage “was
only legal for a few months, from the time that
the California Supreme Court ruled in May of
2008 until the voters adopted Proposition 8
in November of the same year.”
I’m sure glad my last name isn’t SantoGot that? It was only legal for a few rum. For one thing, I wouldn’t want to be
months. Now check out Sprigg’s argument: related to Rick Santorum. For another thing,
“Press reports have indicated that about his name means “The frothy mix of lube and
18,000 same-sex couples got ‘married’ fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct
in California—less than 20% of the total of anal sex.” And that’s the first thing that
identified by the Census. By contrast, 91% pops up on Google.
of opposite-sex couples who lived together
Santorum’s “Google problem,” as it has
in California were married. In other words, been dubbed in the media lately, is something
only 9% of heterosexual couples in California he brought on himself when he compared
have rejected the institution of marriage, gays getting married to man-on-dog sex.
while over 80% of the homosexual couples Shortly thereafter, a reader of Dan Savage’s
rejected ‘marriage’ when it was offered to “Savage Love” column suggested coining
them in 2008.”
“Santorum” as a sex term. Savage obliged.
In other words, those homos who didn’t And “santorum” was born.
get scramble to get married in the few months
In 2007 Santorum was voted out of his
it was legal prove that they don’t really want U.S. Senate seat and we didn’t hear much
it bad enough.
from him. But he’s back with his eye on being
Number 10 on the list, and a long term President Frothy-Mix-of-Lube-and-Fecaleffect, is polygamy. Gays getting married Matter of the United States, and making sure
We’ve all heard the argument that would mean that all bets are off as far as gays and lesbians aren’t allowed to marry is
letting gays and lesbians marry will “hurt” numerical combinations of husbands and still one of his biggest concerns.
Needless to say, President Obama’s
heterosexual marriages. Or our country. Or wives.
Sprigg writes, “If it violates the equal
children. Actual support for these claims is
TTCREEPS continued page 10
Rick Santorum
Peter Sprigg
APRIL 2011
ACCESSline Page 9
Concessions of Love : A Commentary by Tony E. Hansen
For years, the GLBT community has
struggled to find equality at work, housing,
and especially for marriage. For years, we
have seen how groups have formed under
the guise of principled religious freedom or
“moral values” to cast hatred and to douse
the freedoms of others with bigotry. They
would proclaim the Word of God and the Bible
as cornerstones to this rejection of freedom.
They have been able to bully GLBT into
closets and concessions against one’s own
interest. Many states passed so-called laws
or constitutional amendments that define
marriage as between a man and a woman
(banning same –gender marriage).
In Iowa, we have been able to gain civil
liberties protections and safe schools for
GLBT people and children thanks to legislation signed into law in 2007. Today, we
have marriage equality in Iowa thanks to
unanimous court decision.
We are at a tipping point of legal and
social balance in America. With the recent
votes in California, Arizona, Maryland and
Florida against equality, Iowa, Illinois and
some New England states are the few states
that protect equality. From the uncouth
attitudes that some people have professed
with regard to equality and love, there
should be no surprise that court ruling was
met with swift and fierce backlash to pass
a constitutional amendment in Iowa to ban
marriages.
GLBT people have always had to be on
the defensive, had to cower away from hostile,
subjective feelings about whom we are, and
always had to stand up against hypocritical
arguments and spiteful remarks against us.
We were conned into thinking ourselves to be
inferior to some notion of “normal” or some
Aryan-type myth. Yet, we were brought up
in the same traditions as our brothers and
sisters and have wondered why those traditions were not applicable for us.
The hostile and subjective feelings have
been both inwards and outwards. Some
have turned violent against themselves, via
suicide, or through outward violence trying
to disguise through violence against other
GLBT or simply to suppress that which is an
intrinsic trait of us (no more different than
the color of one’s skin). We can not “change”
who we are. Further, we have always had to
make concessions and to deny ourselves
while waiting patiently for “our turn” or for
the truth to somehow “set us free”.
I am tired of concessions where people
say we should just be happy without
marriage or “things the way they are”. Why
does a part of society have to concede their
civil liberties and traditions (those that actually promote the positive in society)? That
seems completely contrary to the principles
for which born this nation.
The time now is to dispel some myths
about civil unions and civil marriages.
• A civil union is not civil marriage unless
heterosexuals are willing to call their
marriages “civil unions”
• Civil marriage does not impose upon religious freedom
• One couple’s marriage does not impact
another’s
• Equal rights are not special rights
• Inequality violates the principles of
America and her promise.
They, “who proclaim the truth and righteousness” (WPTR), like to claim such righteousness and superiority based upon loose
interpretations of a verse. Yet, why do we
have to exploit the mystery of God to defend
hatred and hostile acts? Is this really what
Jesus, Buddha, Judaism or Islam teach?
Marriage is ultimately about love,
commitment and family as witnessed in
countless couples (like that of my own
parents and grandparents) who have weathered years together “for better or for worse”.
Marriage is about love and one marriage
does not destroy that of another marriage.
As well, the divorce of one marriage does not
negatively impact that of another. Family is
about love, commitment, and sacrifice as
well. I cannot help but to wonder why people
want to distort this fundamental truth about
marriage, family and love. Why do these spin
doctors (WPTR) want to ruin the lives of good
law-abiding people and their families?
Furthermore, I protest the idea that
GLBT cannot raise a family as I have
witnessed the destruction of families at the
behest of WPTR. Those WPTR proclaim to
know what is “family” while they wish to
destroy that basic unit of life of others. They
WPTR cannot tell me that losing a child, or
even being ostracized by a family, due of such
hypocritical malice is honorable and just. As
well, more families have and more families
will endure hardships and malice without
marriage or without equal rights protections.
There should be no interest in allowing more
concessions that further a belief that DOMA is
“fair” and “right”, and as well, people should
not be allowed to distort the truth, to instill
fear and to project destructive hatred into
public discourse. The GLBT community has
been tricked into conceding our rights and
our identity.
Equality and acceptance help to heal the
society. Do we have so much violence in the
world that people are not allowed to love or
to be compassionate? Do we have so much
violence in the world that families have to be
torn apart? With all of the destruction, war
and terrorism all over the world, we do not
need to fuel violence, hostility, and hatred
within our own communities. Is promoting
TTCONCESSIONS continued page 28
ACCESSline Page 10
organization chose dogma over kids who
needed help.
“With the redefinition of marriage,
religious
groups of all types will be forced to
recent decision to stop defending the Defense
make
the
same type of choice—get out of the
of Marriage Act in court because it is unconbusiness of helping people or compromise
stitutional has gotten Santorum riled.
In a March 4 column for the Des Moines your constitutionally protected convictions,”
Register, Santorum wrote, “Intellectu- Santorum wrote.
Let me get this straight: if gays are
ally, morally, and constitutionally President
Obama’s claim is absurd. And it is a dagger treated equally then religions of all kinds
aimed at the heart of a core constitutional will abandon social services? Like the local
church-run soup kitchen won’t give out
value: the free exercise of religion.”
soup anymore because
This is, of course,
It’s as if the only thing they don’t want to
not true. The anti-gay
right has been crying between the teachings of, say, give soup to gays? It’s
if the only thing
about how treating
Jesus and abject indifference as
between the teachings
gays equally is akin
to banning God and to human suffering is homo— of, say, Jesus and abject
indifference to human
demanding everyone sexuality.
suffering and need is
worship Perez Hilton.
No one is advocating locking pastors up or homosexuality. So long as religious orgaturning churches into gay bars. What Santo- nizations can discriminate against gays,
rum is really arguing for isn’t the freedom of all is right with the world. Makes perfect
religion; it’s the freedom to discriminate and sense.
In his column Santorum charitably
the freedom to legislate using an anti-gay
added, “I believe if two adults of the same
“morality” code based on religion.
Oddly, to defend his argument he used sex want to have a relationship that is their
the example of Catholic Charities in Boston business. But when they ask society to give
who stopped doing adoptions because that relationship special recognition and
they didn’t want to grant adoptions to gays. privileges, then we should be able to have a
According to The Boston Globe, “(Catholic rational debate about whether that is good
Charities decided) to abandon its founding public policy.”
Aww, isn’t that sweet? Santorum thinks
mission, rather than comply with state law
requiring that gays be allowed to adopt gays deserve to mind their own business. So
children.” Mind you, the state wasn’t forcing long as they aren’t asking to be treated fairly,
Catholic Charities to hand over all of the everything’s cool.
As for the “have a rational debate” part,
babies to a pillaging gay mob. The state
was saying, “Look, you can’t judge a parent that’s pretty suspect coming from someone
unfit just because he or she is a homo.” That who thinks a man having sex with his husband
was, obviously, too much to ask, and the is the same as a man screwing a dog.
CREEPS
APRIL 2011
John Boehner
s--tty job of defending DOMA.
It’s true, Obama just wasn’t that into
the whole thing. Probably because fighting
to keep a law in place that discriminates
against a specific minority in this country
is kind of the antithesis of everything he
campaigned on. Or maybe it’s just because
things are really messed up right now—Hey
there, unemployment rate! Hi, rising gas
prices. Afghanistan, how’s it going? Hello
budget deficit. Global warming, give your
mom a kiss for me!—and the prez has
priorities.
Thankfully, Congress also has priorities.
And under the firm leadership of House
Speaker John Boehner, we can rest assured
that defending the unconstitutional Defense
of Marriage Act is likely soon to be priority
number one.
“I’m really disappointed in the President
and the Department of Justice in the
Well, he did it. President Barack Obama
fact
that
they’re not going to defend a law
announced his administration will no
longer defend the Defense of Marriage Act that Congress passed overwhelmingly. It’s
in court, essentially firing up the big Gay their responsibility to do that,” Boehner told
Bat Signal over America, letting gays know the Christian Broadcasting Network. “Now,
that it’s finally safe to come out and wrest it’s happened before where administrations
marriage away from the poor defenseless have decided they weren’t going to go out
and vigorously defend
heterosexuals.
How could we possibly a law that Congress
That DOMA is
unconstitutional is expect a Republican-controlled passed, but I really am
in the
really a no-brainer, but
House not to take this super disappointed
President in his actions,
for too long the only
but if the President
people willing to say juicy anti-gay bait?
won’t lead, if the Presiso were people with
no power to do anything about it. Finally, dent won’t defend DOMA then you’ll see
there’s someone in charge who isn’t willing the House of Representatives defend our
to let his justice department put on an anti- actions in passing a bill that frankly passed
gay dog and pony show just to placate some overwhelmingly.”
I was unaware that in order for a law to
right-wing a--holes. The fact is, pro-DOMA
folk already thought Obama was doing a
TTCREEPS continued page 32
US NEWS
couples marry.
Meanwhile, in the run-up to the House
of Delegates debate, Delegate Peter Murphy
told the Washington Blade on March 9 that
he’s gay. “I have never denied (being gay).
I just presumed people knew,” he said.
There are six other openly gay members
of the Maryland House, and one openly
gay senator.
NY governor to push for
same-sex marriage this
year
The new national group Equality
Matters met with New York Gov. Andrew
Cuomo on March 10 and reported that
he’s eager to legalize same-sex marriage
this year.
“While our specific discussion today is
private, what’s clear from our meeting with
Gov. Cuomo is that he wants to get this done
this year, as soon as possible, and that he
is prepared to use his considerable power
and influence to make it happen,” said EM
President Richard Socarides.
“What’s not clear,” Socarides added,
“is how we get to the magic number of 32
in the Senate.”
Equality Matters describes itself as
a new campaign for full LGBT equality
that utilizes strategic communications,
research, training and media monitoring to
strengthen efforts for full LGBT rights and
to correct anti-gay misinformation.
couples marry.
DC sees doubling in
marriage-license
applications
Marriage-license applications in
Washington, D.C., jumped from 3,100 in 12
months to 6,600 in 12 months in the year
since same-sex marriage was legalized.
Though the district does not keep
tallies of straight versus gay licenses, the
number of applications per year usually
varies very little, strongly suggesting that
all of the increase since March 2010 can be
attributed to gay people.
School to let gays meet
The board of trustees of Flour Bluff
Independent School District in Corpus
Christi, Texas, granted permission March 8
for students to form a campus Gay-Straight
Alliance (GSA) club after the American Civil
Liberties Union intervened on behalf of
Nikki Peet, a student who had been denied
permission to start the club.
According to the ACLU, the school had
threatened to prevent all extracurricular
TTUS NEWS continued page 38
ACCESSline’s fun guide
Our Picks for April
3/25-4/17 Des Moines Community Playhouse:
DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS
3/29-4/3 Orpheum Theatre, Omaha NE:
YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN
4/1 Englert Theatre, Iowa City:
JOHN WATERS LIVE: “THIS FILTHY WORLD”
4/1 Grand Opera House, Dubuque:
SECOND CITY, FAIR & UNBALANCED
4/1-4/9 Sondheim Center, Fairfield:
WAY OFF BROADWAY: INTO THE WOODS
4/5 Orpheum Theatre, Omaha NE:
COMPANIA NACIONAL DE DANZA 2
4/8 Englert Theatre, Iowa City:
NATE STANIFORTH, MAGICIAN
4/8-4/10 Gallagher Bluedorn, Cedar Falls:
DISNEY’S BEAUTY AND THE BEAST
4/10 Sondheim Center, Fairfield:
ORCHESTRA IOWA PRESENTS THE CLASSICS
4/16 Orpheum Theatre, Sioux City:
Souix City Symphony - New Discoveries
RICKY NELSON REMEMBERED FEATURING
MATTHEW AND GUNNAR NELSON
4/17 The Garden Nightclub, Des Moines:
Miss Gay Des Moines FFI 2011 Pageant
Danish Concert Pianist Werner Elmker
4/25 9pm ET/PT on PBS: Stonewall Uprising
“It was the Rosa Parks moment,” says one man. June 28, 1969: NYC police raid a Greenwich
Village Mafia-run gay bar, The Stonewall Inn. For the first time, patrons refuse to be led into
paddy wagons, setting off a 3-day riot that launches the Gay Rights Movement.
Airs Monday, April 25, 2011 9:00 p.m. ET/PT. 4/265/1 Orpheum Theatre, Omaha NE:
LES MISERABLES
4/27 Gallagher Bluedorn, Cedar Falls:
UNI varsity men’s glee club spring concert
... and for May
5/7 Kings & Queens Taps Nightclub, Waterloo:
Lyme Disease Benefit Show/ “Under Our
Skin”
5/14 Old Market, Omaha NE:
New Braska Festival
Deep Inside Hollywood by Romeo San Vicente
Lee Daniels eyes
Bradley Cooper
Bradley Cooper. Photo: New Line Cinema.
What movie will Lee Daniels (Precious)
make next? It seems like he has a new
potential project every few weeks. Will
it be Selma like we keep hearing? The
Butler? That remake of Fellini’s Nights of
Cabiria? Well, the answer is maybe “none
of the above” if The Paperboy happens.
Based on Pete Dexter’s 1995 novel, it’s a
crime thriller about two brothers pulled
into the investigation of a rural sheriff’s
murder and it’s set to star I Am Number
Four’s hot young thing Alex Pettyfer. Word
is that Daniels is already reading actors for
roles and has made offers to both Bradley
Cooper to play Pettyfer’s older brother
and to Modern Family’s Sofia Vergara. Of
course, what Precious fans want to know
is if there’s a part for Gabourey Sidibe in
all this, because given the fleeting nature
of deals and shelved projects, literally
anything can still happen at this point. So
stay tuned for further speculation.
Griffin’s Gleeful
Tea Party
It wouldn’t be a proper week of entertainment news if the Glee PR machine
didn’t have some kind of announcement.
And this week’s flash is the addition of a
new right-wing character to the cast. A Tea
Party-loving, homeschooling, Sarah Palin
type. Played by Kathy Griffin. Now, contrast
that casting announcement with creator
Ryan Murphy’s stated intention to make
this character part of the show’s inclusive
vibe. Does anyone think it’s possible to
have it both ways? Will it ride the outside
edge of insulting, like the way Ashley Fink’s
character Lauren Zizes gets to be powerful and the butt of fat jokes? Will the show
simply abandon the character and her story
lines when the next sensational musical
guest star comes along? Can politically
outspoken Kathy Griffin play a sympathetic
right-winger without smirking? And, more
to the point, how long before Sarah Palin
takes to the Internet with a video explaining how offended she is?
Tilda’s Thai debut?
That tiny sound you just barely heard
was the collective swoon and sigh of art
film fans who very much want the following
project to hurry up and become real: hyperacclaimed gay Thai filmmaker Apichatpong
Weerasethakul, whose latest film Uncle
Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives won
the Palme d’Or at Cannes and is currently
in a handful of U.S. arthouse cinemas, is
working on his next film, Mekong Hotel.
And it looks like it might star Queen of
Everything Cool, Tilda Swinton. What’s it
about? The director says it will “address
the relationship between man and water,
the catastrophic flooding which is blamed
on Chinese dams and diseases spread by
industrial-scale pig farming.” Of course, if
that’s the case then expect those themes
to be dealt with obliquely; Weerasethakul
is infamous for plotlines that feel baffling
right down to the closing credits. But who
cares, really, because if Swinton winds up
taking part it’ll get the visionary director
seen by even more sets of confused eyes.
And in the movie business that’s how you
win.
Lesbian directors
are all right
Everything’s coming up deals for two
lesbian directors. One of them is hot off an
Oscar-nominated success story. The other
one brushed up against Academy Award
acclaim a few years ago. And both of them
have high profile projects lined up. Lisa
Cholodenko, whose The Kids Are All Right is
the movie to beat in the Best Actress race,
is taking on the film adaptation of Tom
Perrotta’s novel The Abstinence Teacher. In
the same vein as Perrotta’s earlier stories,
Election and Little Children, it will mine
anxiety in suburbia when a New Jersey
sex education teacher has to battle local
conservative forces that would seek to
silence her curriculum. Meanwhile, toughminded Boys Don’t Cry filmmaker Kimberly
Peirce has set up The Knife at Universal,
a true crime drama about an L.A. gang
member-turned-FBI-informant whose life
is in constant danger. No casts or start dates
for either of these projects, but details are
sure to come soon enough.
Wonder Woman +
Elizabeth Hurley = love?
If she comes from an already manfree, lesbian-leaning place called Paradise
Island, are we surprised that the rebooted
Wonder Woman TV project from David
E. Kelly is going to feature an arch ladynemesis who may have strong feelings for
the crime fighter in red, white and blue?
No? Good, because that villainess—an
evil pharmaceutical corporation CEO—is
going to be played by Elizabeth Hurley, who
should be great at bringing some devilish
sex to the role. In other cool casting news,
Rent alum Tracie Thoms is on board as
Etta, cheery personal assistant to Friday
Night Lights star Adrianne Palicki’s Diana
Prince/Wonder Woman. More casting and
go-to-series decision news as it comes in,
but that sound you hear is a million lesbian
TTHOLLYWOOD continued page 17
ACCESSline Page 12
the fun guide
APRIL 2011
APRIL 2011
the fun guide
ACCESSline Page 13
Partying Hard: Joe Jonas Does It By Himself by Joshua Dagon
This month the cover of Details Magazine features Joe Jonas who, along with his
brothers, makes up the famous boy-band,
“The Osmonds.” Joe has, according to the
cover headline, decided to “[go] it alone.” I’m
assuming the magazine means a solo music
career; since Joe is now twenty-one years old,
the other “going it alone” thing should have
happened years and years ago. [I wonder if
his “purity ring” ever got in the way?]
There was some speculation in midJanuary of this year on OceanUp.com—not
a web site that I normally read; one of the
ads promised to help me find a first-time
tampon—that Joe was taking a break from
his brothers. At the time, however, the
young rocker-dude only confirmed that he
was writing music with some other musicians, such as Hans Zimmer and Inglebert
Humperdinck. “I love writing with other
musicians,” Joe was quoted as saying. “I’ve
learned it’s much more productive than
writing with elevator repairmen or a group
of deaf monkeys.”
Evidently, the news of his confirmed
solo-endeavor goes beyond the first-time
tampon crowd, hence the Details cover. Joe
does look much more mature in the photograph, not unlike George Michael on his own
breakout solo album, which was released in
1987. If you remember, George went on to
have a very successful solo career, eventually
becoming the most popular male pop artist
ever to be arrested in a public men’s room.
Still, the mature-looking, trademark facial
hair that Joe Jonas is sporting these days isn’t
limited to him and George Michael. No, Justin
Timberlake also employed the look when he
released his solo album in 2002. “It was time
to make my own musical statement,” Justin
said once but not really. “Besides, that Lance
guy kept lookin’ at me funny.”
Joe’s brothers, Kevin and Nick, are seemingly okay with Joe’s plans to become a solo
artist. In fact, Nick Jonas already cheated
on his brothers, so to speak, with a band
called “Nick Jonas and the Administration.”
Their album, “Who I Am,” was released in
February of last year, but never really took
off commercially, ranking in sales between
“Elmo Sings the Blues” and the Tonya Harding
Commemorative Plate.
I suppose it’s not really news that a
member of a boy-band has solo ambitions.
Jordan Knight from New Kids On the Block
released his first solo album twelve years ago,
at which time the four remaining members
changed the name of the band to “The Backstreet Boys.” Robbie Williams of Take That
began his solo career in 1996, although his
separation wasn’t as amiable as Joe’s from
his brothers; when Williams tried to release
his own material, the
band’s manager sued
him and then stapled
his hands to a set of
drums. Brian McFadden departed from the
group Westlife—which
is, reportedly, some
boy-band in Europe—
in 2004, but no one
cared because Westlife
is just some boy-band
in Europe.
Obviously, it’s important for a member
of a boy-band to change his image a bit when
he begins a solo career, like when Jonathan
Knight openly dated other guys and then went
into real estate. Joe Jonas is no exception.
I’ve mentioned the standard, mature-looking,
I’m-not-a-teenager-anymore facial hair, but
Joe also got a haircut, which is reminiscent
of an image-decision made by Ricky Martin
after leaving the band Menudo in 1991. If he
follows Ricky Martin’s career strategy, Joe has
another twenty years to pursue superstardom before announcing his homosexuality in
a strategic effort to sustain public attention.
For the moment, however, Joe is dating Ashley
Greene of Twilight fame. At least, that’s what
his publicist wants us to believe. Just watch,
though; as soon as the spotlight begins to
dim, Joe will appear on daytime talk shows
to promote his autobiography in which he
reveals that, all along, Ashley Greene was
really Justin Bieber in drag. Then, he’ll marry
Reichen Lehmkuhl, who will have just been
released from prison after “accidentally”
killing Perez Hilton with a snow shovel. Until
then, Joe seems to be satisfied with changing
his attitude about alcohol consumption and
by walking around West Hollywood with his
boxers showing. However, I’m of the opinion
that Joe’s U-Tube video of “Single Ladies” is
somewhat telling.
Joe is, admittedly, very comfortable with
his current image. He told Details that “You’re
so much cuter in person”
is something he hears
from people all the time.
He has a personal fitness
trainer with whom he
works five days a week.
He shops at Trader Joe’s.
He tells anecdotes about
other rock stars who
admire the Jonas Brothers. One such rock star
is Paul McCartney, who
reportedly described the boy-band as “the
new Beatles.” Then there’s Patrick Carney
of the Black Keys, who believes the Jonas
Brothers are “so rad.” But Joe is really quite
humble. Despite the fact that he and his
brothers made over thirty-five million dollars
last year, Joe says being a judge on Top Chef
was “a dream come true.”
Sure, I find the music of the Jonas Brothers to be slightly less pleasant than hemor-
“I love writing with other
musicians,” Joe was quoted
as saying. “I’ve learned
it’s much more productive
than writing with elevator
repairmen or a group of deaf
monkeys.”
“There's nothing wrong with being gay,
but I'm not.”
—Pop star Joe Jonas, in the April 2011 issue of Details
Magazine.
Novelist Joshua Dagon is the author of
Into the Mouth of the Wolf, The Fallen,
and Demon Tears. For more information,
please go to www.joshuadagon.com.
To contact Mr. Dagon, please e-mail him at
[email protected].
rhoid surgery. Still, I’ll admit that they’re
pretty cute, like lil’ Italian leprechauns.
Certainly, I’ll be watching Joe’s career with
interest, anticipating the new dance/pop
sound he mentioned of his solo music. And
despite all of the drama with Taylor Swift
and Ashley Greene, I’ll also be watching
AfterElton.com. Seriously. The boy lives in
West Hollywood and shops at Trader Joe’s.
Seriously.
ACCESSline Page 14
the fun guide
APRIL 2011
The Outfield by Dan Woog
Puck buddies
One day a couple of months ago, Craig
Brownstein was enjoying a Washington
Capitals game. He turned to his partner, Doug
Johnson, and said, “You’re my puck buddy.”
The two hockey fanatics laughed at the
pun—a sly reference to you-know-what.
A couple of weeks later, a gay hockey blog
with the same name launched.
Puckbuddys.com (the more grammatically connect “puckbuddies” URL was already
taken) may not be the only gay hockey site
in the blogosphere. But it sure staked out
great territory.
The tagline is “for boys who like boys
who like hockey.” Brownstein and Johnson
make no apologies: They like both the game,
and the guys who play it.
The attraction of hockey is clear, they
write: “the speed, the flash, the unpredictability of a bouncing puck.” They also like “the
coaches, the fights, the crowds.”
But mostly, the pair write, “we like the
players—their amazing athleticism and
physical abilities. And let’s face it: an extraordinary number of hockey players are simply
hot—and that includes every single Cap.”
Johnson calls himself “a journalist by day
and a Brooks Laich fan in the off hours.” (Laich
is a 6-foot-2, 210, very-good-looking left
wing.) Brownstein—who works in PR—says
he “spends his free time building shrines to
Sasha Semin and learning to speak Russian.”
(Semin is a 6-foot-2, 205-pound right wing.
He too is quite attractive.)
Puckbuddys is not your average hockey
blog. A preview of a game against the Florida
Panthers first mentioned injuries, then
quickly noted: “let’s get to the meat of the
post… As painful as this is to say, as a rule, the
Panthers are an exceptionally good-looking
lot. Bienvenido a Miami indeed.”
To prove their point, Brownstein and
Johnson posted photos of several Panthers.
Two wore hockey gear. One shot showed
players clad only in Speedos. A fourth had
one guy wearing—well, it could have been
nothing at all. Google Images is a wonderful tool.
Other posts include NHL news, player
profiles and random items like a tongue-incheek photo of the Rev. Fred Phelps holding
a sign “God Hates the Caps.” At least, I think
it was a joke.
One thing Puckbuddys does not do is
“granular level stuff—plus/minus ratings,
minor league stats, all that,” Brownstein
says. “We’re not puckheads. We couldn’t
even fake it.”
In fact, Brownstein says, he never much
cared for hockey as a kid. Growing up in
Rochester, N.Y., he “wasn’t much of a jock.”
By his early teen years, he knew he was gay.
But he hid his sexuality, and joined—of all
things—his high school football team.
“We were OK, but I sucked,” he says
(referring to his skill level, nothing else).
Still, that was an important part of his high
school experience. “I was a crappy, directionless student,” Brownstein says. “I needed the
discipline of football. It was my first immersion into a team—experiencing dizzying
highs and horrible lows together with other
guys.” He formed friendships that last 30
years later.
Neither he nor Johnson cared much for
hockey. But—like many Washingtonians—
they were drawn in by the Capitals’ playoff
run a few years ago. Hi-def TV made the game
come alive; the announcers were engaging
and funny. A passion was born.
Then came Brownstein’s casual “puck
buddy” comment to Johnson. The blog soon
followed.
The gay perspective was natural. “A lot of
players are ripping hot,” Brownstein observes.
“Add athleticism to their natural beauty—and
the fact that they kick the crap out of each
other—and it’s perfect. Plus the traditional
mainstream media never talk about how hot
Alex Ovechkin is. He’s a vision.”
The blog has received boosts from
mainstream sources, though. Yahoo Sports
mentioned it, and Johnson and Brownstein
were interviewed by Washington’s CBS radio
affiliate. Local hockey blogs have thrown a
bone to Puckbuddys too, although the Capitals’ front office never responded to an e-mail
from Brownstein.
A video produced by the pair caught
some eyes. They took a ubiquitous YouTube
clip and fashioned it into a hilarious “Hitler
reacts to the Pittsburgh
Penguins’ loss to the
Caps in the 2011 Winter
Classic” video.
One thing the pair
disagree on is: How gay is
hockey? Johnson’s gaydar
constantly goes off in the
Caps’ arena. Brownstein,
though, sometimes feels
that he and his partner
are the only gay fans in
the place.
Meanwhile, the NHL
playoffs beckon. The
pressure will build on
players, fans—and bloggers. Brownstein and
Johnson are ready to cover whatever lies
ahead. But they promise not to lose their
sense of humor. After all, their blog notes,
“We’re here, we’re queer, we’re red all over.”
Yes, red—as in the Caps’ colors. You don’t
need to be a puckhead—or a Puckbuddy
follower—to get the pun.
But it helps.
everything to lose, while he was on top of
the mountain or adored by thousands or
millions.” The basketball player hears gay
curses in the locker room and the stands, so
he stays in the closet.
But he has a lot
to say, so he started
blogging. “I wasn’t sure
how it would go, and
what would happen,” he
says. He was pleasantly
surprised.
He posts about
many things. He has
written about dreams,
politics, youth in jeopardy, his own internalized homophobia and
coming out to his family.
Describing his first time
in a gay bar, he wrote:
“I got so nervous it was
unbelievable. More than any basketball game
I ever played, more than anything I ever
experienced.”
He also wrote about his first sexual
experience with a man. It’s the kind of stuff
not often seen on pro athletes’ pages.
After that first encounter, he wrote, “I
had the feeling that everyone was looking at
me, and looking at me differently. …The only
rational explanation I have is that in some
part I felt I did something wrong or bad, and
everybody in the street knew about it.”
Here’s his description of his New Year’s
celebration:
“I wouldn’t mind having a night out on
the town, well a town where I can be gay
and there are a lot of available young blond
guys which just happened to be gay. Instead,
I enjoyed playing five on five and working on
our full court press… I went to a restaurant
with a teammate and his wife and called it a
night. The only thing I was kissing as 2011
came in was this screen, since I was finishing
up another post.”
The theme of conflict runs through much
of his writing. He knows he provides an
important voice to young gay athletes—but
he is aware that by not being out, he sends a
mixed message.
“I really wish there was something
that I could do, and I do think about it,” he
writes. “Maybe if I do come out even one
kid will understand that being gay doesn’t
mean you can’t succeed in life and can’t make
your dreams come true. It would be worth
it, but for now it’s just too much to lose.”
He is not worried his identity will be revealed.
“I know I’m taking all the measures that need
to be taken in order not to give out any hints,”
he says. His writing is strong—but without
important details, the picture he paints can
never be completely full.
When he began blogging, he thought
he might reach out to professional athletes
in similar straits. That has not happened.
However, he says, “I have heard from a lot
of interesting people.” Some have become
e-mail friends. He also has helped guys who
felt worse than he did.
It’s not as freeing as being out. But it
works for him.
Dan Woog is a journalist, educator, soccer
coach, gay activist, and author of the “Jocks”
series of books on gay male athletes. Visit his
website at www.danwoog.com. He can be
reached at [email protected].
“Maybe if I do come
out even one kid will
understand that being
gay doesn’t mean you
can’t succeed in life and
can’t make your dreams
come true. It would be
worth it, but for now
it’s just too much to
lose.”
Basketball in the closet
“On the Internet,” the famous New
Yorker cartoon goes, “no one knows you’re
a dog.”
And on the Internet, no one knows who
“Anonymous Baller” is.
That’s fine with him. All anyone needs to
know, he says, is that he’s an American playing
professional basketball overseas.
Oh yes. He’s gay. And he’s blogging—
about basketball, sexuality and much
more—at “Playing Basketball from the Closet”
(http://bballinthecloset.blogspot.com).
The closet part is as important as the
hoops. This is a rare pro athlete: He does not
want anyone to know who he is.
He was willing to share some aspects
of his life with The OutField. Growing up,
he says, he loved “any sport with a ball.” He
didn’t understand what “gay” meant until the
beginning of high school.
Playing varsity basketball brought
popularity. He dated a girl and tried to blend
in. He recalls those years as “really shy and
really lonely. I did what I needed to survive
the questions.” He made up stories to seem
straight.
He lived for practices and games. “I felt
like half a human being,” he says. “I didn’t
know what would happen with my life.”
Now, he looks forward to the end of each
season. He vacations in someplace he’s never
been. There, he lives his “second life—the
gay one.”
With each vacation, he says, “I develop as
a person. I accept myself more. I understand
that I could be happy as a gay person, a couple,
and I’m not doomed to have a sad and lonely
life just because I’m gay.”
Yet he still won’t come out.
He has deep respect and admiration for
John Amaechi and Gareth Thomas, the NBA
and professional rugby player respectively
who have come out. At the same time, the
blogger says, there has never been a pro
athlete who has come out “while he had
the fun guide
APRIL 2011
ACCESSline’s STATEWIDE
Recurring Events List
Hear Me Out by Chris Azzopardi
R.E.M., Collapse Into Now
The following list is provided by—and corrected by—ACCESSline readers like you. If
you would like to add an event, or if you notice a mistake in this list, please email editor@
ACCESSlineIOWA.com.
Interest Group Abbreviations:
L: Lesbian
G: Gay
+: HIV-related
D: Drag
W: General Women’s Interest
Sunday
Every Sunday, GLBT AA, 5-6 PM, at First
Baptist Church at 500 N. Clinton St., Iowa City.
For more info about Intergroup and Alcoholics
Anonymous call the 24-Hour Answering Service at
319-338-9111 or visit the AA-IC website: http://
aa-ic.org/. [ L G B T M W A ]
Every Sunday, L WORD LIVES: L NIGHT, 7PM,
at the Firewater Saloon, 347 South Gilbert St., Iowa
City, 319-321-5895. The night will start with Season
1, Episode 1 of the L Word... because a good thing
should never die. FoLLowing the L Word wiLL be a
Drag King show at 9:30 p.m. No cover. Tel, 319-3215895. [ L B T W D ]
Every Sunday, THE QUIRE: EASTERN IOWA’S
GLBT CHORUS REHEARSALS, 6-8:30 PM, at Zion
Lutheran Church, 310 N. Johnson St., Iowa City.
Membership is open to all GLBT folks, as well as
allies who support the community. There are no
auditions; you only need to be willing to attend
rehearsals regularly and learn your music. The
Quire prepares two full concerts each year in the
winter and spring, and occasionally performs
shorter programs at events in the Iowa City/Cedar
Rapids area. The Quire is a member of Gay and
Lesbian Association of Choruses (GALA), and has
developed a reputation for excellence and variety
in its concert programs. For more info, visit http://
www.thequire.org/. [ L G B T M W A ]
Every Sunday, QUEER GUERRILLA BRUNCH,
Locations around Iowa City to be announced each
week. LGBTQIs & Allies gather for Sunday brunch
to celebrate community and create visibility. Sign
up for future brunches on Facebook at http://www.
facebook.com/group.php?gid=120517046371 [ L
GBTMWA]
Every Sunday, RAINBOW AND ALLIED
YOUTH, 8:00pm-11:00pm, The Center, 1300
Locust, Des Moines, IA 50309. Social group for
Queer youth 25 years and under [ L G B T ]
Every Wednesday, LEZ TALK (LIVE TALK
SHOW), 9pm, Des Moines Social Club, 1408 Locust
St, Des Moines, IA . New talk show in the Capital City,
Des Moines, IA. This show is hosted by Lezzies and
made for ALL people. We have successfully secured
a slot (we said slot) at the DMSC Wednesdays 9pm!
Talk about must see TV! [ L G B T + A ]
Second Sunday, LGBT MOVIE NIGHT, 2 p.m.,
Johnson County Senior Center, 28 S. Linn St., room
202 , Iowa City, IA 52240. A series of narrative
and documentary movies focusing on lesbian, gay,
bisexual and transgender issues with informal
discussions afterward. An encore screening and
discussion of each movie will be offered on the
following evenings to accommodate more participants. The selections will share with the audience
some of the traumas and successes experienced by
the LGBT community throughout history, as well as
center around gay love stories and the universal
search for meaningful relationships. For more
information, or to request a favorite title, contact the
series organizer, Elsie Gauley Vega, at 319-337-4487
or [email protected]. [ L G B T ]
Monday
1st 2nd Monday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG
NORTH IOWA CHAPTER MEETING, 7 PM, at First
Presbyterian Church, 100 S. Pierce St., Mason City.
Meetings are held the First and Second Monday
(alternating) of the month. For more info, call
641-583-2848. [ L G B T M W A K ]
1st Monday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG
QUAD CITIES CHAPTER MEETING, 6:30 PM, at
Eldridge United Methodist Church, 604 S. 2nd St.,
Eldridge. For more info, call 563-285-4173. [ L G
BTMWAK]
4th Monday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG
WAUKON/NORTHEAST CHAPTER MEETING, 7
B: Bisexual
T: Transgender
A: General Interest
K: Kids and Family
M: General Men’s Interest
PM, First Lutheran Church, 604 West Broadway
Street , Decorah, IA 52101. in the Fellowship Hall
at First Lutheran Church, Decorah. 604 West Broadway Street. (563) 382-2638‎ [ L G B T M W A ]
Every Monday, DES MOINES GAY MEN’S
CHORUS REHEARSALS, 7pm-9:30pm, Plymouth
Congregational Church, 4126 Ingersoll Avenue,
Des Moines, IA . For more information about
singing with the Chorus, contact Rebecca Gruber at
515-865-9557. The Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus
does not discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation. [ G M A ]
Every Monday Wednesday Thursday Saturday,
GLBT ONLY AA MEETINGS IN DES MOINES, 6 PM
- SAT 5 PM, at 945 19th St. (east side of building,
south door). [ L G B T M W A ]
Monday, DIVERSITY CHORUS REHEARSALS,
7:00 - 8:30 p.m., Westminster Presbyterian Church,
4114 Allison Ave., Des Moines, IA 50310. Des Moines
Diversity Chorus welcomes new singers, begins
02/07/2011. No audition required. Singing with
meaning since 1997! Call Julie Murphy at 515-2553576 for more information. No cost to members.
Rehearsals continue on Monday evenings through
5/2/11. [ L G B T M W A D ]
Tuesday
2nd Tuesday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG
AMES CHAPTER MEETING, 7 PM, Youth and
Shelter Services Offices, 420 Kellogg Ave., 1st
Floor, Ames, IA 50010. Meets in the Paul Room of
Youth and Shelter Services at 420 Kellogg Avenue,
Ames. For more info, call 515-291-3607. [ L G B T
MWAK]
2nd Tuesday of the Month, CEDAR RAPIDS
UNITY BOARD MEETING, 6:30-8 PM, Cedar Rapids,
IA . at 6300 Rockwell Dr, Cedar Rapids. Meetings
are open to the general public. For more info, call
319-366-2055 or visit: http://www.crglrc.org [ L
GBTMWA]
2nd Tuesday of the Month, SPIRITUAL
SEEKERS, 7-8:30 PM, Iowa City, IA . at Trinity Episcopal Church, 320 E. College St, Iowa City. Spiritual
Seekers is a group for people of all faiths, or of
little faith, who wish to make deeper connections
between their sexual identities and the spiritual
dimension in their lives. Meetings include discussion of specialized topics, telling of pieces of our faith
journeys, and occasional prayer and meditation. (On
the 4th Tuesday of each month, the group gathers at
a local restaurant for food and fellowship.) For more
info, contact Tom Stevenson: tbstevenson@mchsi.
com or 319.354.1784. [ L G B T M W A ]
Every Tuesday, OUT (OUR UNITED TRUTH):
A GLBT SUPPORT GROUP, 7-8:30 PM, Peoples
Church Unitarian Universalist, 600 3rd Avenue
Southeast, Cedar Rapids, IA 52401. For more info,
call 563-359-0816. [ L G B T M W A ]
Every Tuesday, ACE INCLUSIVE BALLROOM,
7-8:30 PM, Old Brick, 26 East Market Street, Iowa
City, IA 52245. All skill levels are welcome. American
social dance, Latin, a mix of dance from the last 100
years. For more info, contact Mark McCusker at
[email protected], 319-621-8530 or Nora
Garda at 319-400-4695, or visit http://iowadancefest.blogspot.com/. [ L G B T M W A ]
Every Tuesday, ARGENTINE TANGO, 7:309:30 PM, Iowacity/Johnson Co Senior Center, 28
South Linn Street, Iowa City, IA 52240. Practice
and open dance. A donation of $1-2 per person is
requested for use of the Senior Center. For more info,
contact Karen Jackson at 319-447-1445 or e-mail
[email protected]. [ L G B T M W A ]
Every Tuesday, KARAOKE IDOL, 9 PM, Studio
13, 13 South Linn Street, Iowa City, IA 52240. Drink
specials and great competition! Visit www.sthirteen.
com. [ L G B T M W A ]
TTEVENTS continued page 28
ACCESSline Page 15
R.E.M.’s first album since 2008’s Accelerate, a return to form for the misstepping
rock icons, is as obvious as lead singer
Michael Stipe’s coming out—and that’s
fine. After adventurous detours into hard
rock and hipster pop, the trio’s 15th LP
reaches back in time to their glory days with
a lively post-punk revival and backtracking balladry. There’s the pretty “ÜBerlin,”
a free-spirited galvanizer that’s every bit
classic R.E.M.; even the one-two punch of
“Discoverer” and “All the Best” bristle with
‘80s drive, though Jacknife Lee’s pump-thesound production doesn’t equal energy…
it equals headache. The album is basically
split into two categories: loud and quiet, and
the latter prevails. Stipe expresses a refreshing vulnerability on “Oh My Heart,” but it’s
“Walk It Back” that really gets you with his
almost-broken voice suggesting regret and
that, well, everybody hurts. The most joyous
moment is also one of their most embarrassing, as “It Happened Today” ridiculously
works in “hip, hip, hooray” to rhyme with
the song’s name. It’s no mistake, too, that
it sounds like an Eddie Vedder track; he’s
on it. A wasted collaboration with Peaches
on the head-rushy “Alligator Aviator Autopilot Antimatter” is almost just as lame. But
tucked within these blunders is some of
R.E.M.’s best work in years, a return to their
prime that seems to say you can lose your
religion, but you can also get it back.
Grade: B
Avril Lavigne,
Goodbye Lullaby
We like our bratty babes—how else
is Ke$ha’s clock still tick-tocking? But
Avril Lavigne, who had it out for a rivaling
“Girlfriend” on her last album, 2007’s The
Best Damn Thing, was the resident whippersnapper before she got bumped. She’s
not exactly up for a throw-down with Ke$ha
on her fourth CD, moving in a no-nonsense
direction that befits the life of a 26-year-old
divorcee—meaning there are lots of poprock relationship rants, and bad words.
Aww, our sk8r girl’s all grown up. But that
doesn’t mean things aren’t—like her big
hit from 2002—complicated. What could
be deemed as notes-to-self songs, “Darlin”
and “Everybody Hurts” (not that one) might
as well be the voices in her head, telling
her everything’s gonna be all right. But on
Goodbye Lullaby everything’s not, especially
when Lavigne’s left to the songwriting—and
that’s far too often, as her self-introspection
comes off as serious… if you’re Taylor Swift.
A lack of depth, however, can’t stop her
savvy production team—including hitmaker Max Martin—from giving her word
deficiency a workout. There’s a cuteness
to the feel-good groove of “Stop Standing
There” and “Smile” that can’t be denied,
and she puts her party-pooper aside for
the catchy “What the Hell”—which would
probably disgust Kelly “I Do Not Hook Up”
Clarkson, another pop star who let growing
up get in the way of good music. Lavigne
just got luckier.
Grade: B-
Adele, 21
So much has been said about the
big British music boom, but Duffy’s drab
sophomore album was D.O.A. and Amy
Winehouse drank herself into oblivion.
But Adele Adkins, with the wowing voice
and girl-everyone-likes appeal, sings like
she’s here to stay on her post-19 release.
Taking off two years after delivering her
debut (the title represents the age at which
she wrote it), 21 reflects a tumultuous split
that left her with a broken heart and 11
songs, all done-up by a slick team of Top-40
producers. The blitzing first, “Rolling in the
Deep,” has thunderous bite as its acoustic
guitar bursts into a surging old-school
soul song with some mad vocals ripping
into her ex-lover: “Go ahead and sell me
out and I’ll lay your shit bare.” Tell us how
you really feel, Adele. And, well, she does,
either trying to shake love’s memories on
“Set Fire to the Rain” or, with “Turning
Tables,” walking away from a wrecking
relationship. Wronged-woman balladry is
the album’s primary pursuit, with numbers
like “Take It All,” featuring a stunning bridge
and choir; an intimate bossa nova cover of
the Cure’s “Lovesong”; and showstopper
“Someone Like You,” a wrenching, repeatworthy torch song with enough conviction
penetrating her colossal wail to crush you
into itty-bitty pieces. It’s the voice of a
classic in the making.
Grade: AChris Azzopardi can be reached online
at [email protected].
ACCESSline Page 16
the fun guide
APRIL 2011
APRIL 2011
HOLLYWOOD
TV viewers clearing space on their DVRs.
The Jackass machine
keeps rolling
Johnny Knoxville in “Jackass: Number
Two” from Paramount Pictures.
The men of Jackass need to keep
working. And if those jobs could involve
less chance of spinal cord injury then so
much the better. And to that end, Johnny
Knoxville has a couple of new projects
lined up. The first one, called First Man,
is a script about a rowdy hellraiser whose
wife is elected president. His response?
Goofy post-adolescent (OK, more like
creeping middle-age) rebellion. And after
that Knoxville is planning to re-team with
Jackass colleagues Bam Margera and Ryan
Dunn for a crime comedy called Mustache
Riders. It’ll co-star Willie Nelson as a
veteran outlaw who leads three small-time
crooks on a buried treasure hunt and will,
in keeping with the three “actors’” abilities,
the fun guide
provide them with the opportunity to do
their own stunts. Now, it’s presumed that
none of those stunts will involve two naked
men being superglued to one another like
in Jackass 3D, but you never know. Don’t
underestimate these guys and their love
of the gay-adjacent scenario.
New Year’s Eve?
For gays too?
Pretty Woman director Garry Marshall
knows when to strike while the iron is
still hot. His last film, the huge ensemble
comedy Valentine’s Day, was a big hit
with audiences and, in spite of its timid
– OK, stupid – portrayal of gay love (Gay
characters Eric Dane and Bradley Cooper
don’t kiss. Instead, one of them brushes the
other’s check with an orchid. Yes, really.) it
managed not to offend much of the queer
audience. Well, now Marshall’s back in
action with a sequel of sorts: New Year’s
Eve. It’ll star, among many others, Robert
DeNiro, Ashton Kutcher, Katherine Heigl,
Lea Michele, Josh Duhamel, Sofia Vergara,
Zac Efron, Hilary Swank, Jon Bon Jovi,
Michele Pfeiffer, Sarah Jessica Parker, Ice
Cube and Ryan Seacrest. So a franchise of
holiday-themed rom-coms is born. But we
demand that this time the gays and/or the
lesbians be allowed to kiss at midnight. This
isn’t a polite request. Just do it.
Romeo San Vicente kisses and tells.
Then kisses again. He can be reached
care of this publication or by email at
[email protected].
ACCESSline Page 17
ACCESSline Page 18
the fun guide
APRIL 2011
The Gay Wedding Planner by Beau Fodor
Nathan and Alden Ritz
Alden Ritz, Michael Aguilar, and Nathan Ritz
In the place where they first met, Nathan
proposed to Alden on bended knee, he asked
“Do you promise, promise to spend your
life with me?” Alden said: “Yes, I promise,
promise.” And so the wedding planning
began. Nathan and Alden began planning
for a large, elaborate summer wedding with
hundreds of guests, fine food and a grand
ballroom, but then they realized that they
were making ‘their day’ about the guests
and not about the true meaning of the event:
joining two lives into one. They wanted to
celebrate life’s loveliest liberty: marriage and
their love for each other. The wedding took place on March 12,
2011 at the future location of Nathan’s
brother’s restaurant, Capital Pub & Hot
Dog Company, just south of the East Village. Nathan planned and coordinated every
detail of the event himself. The venue was
an open and raw space that the couple hired
Tracy Fuller of Innovative Events to decorate,
and B&B Market, Mom Ritz, and Grandma
Curry to provide the catering. Nathan said
the day was one of the most relaxed days he
has ever had, he knew everything would be
perfect, and he said it was. The couple even
went home a few hours before the ceremony
to take a nap! “By the time the day-of rolls
around, if it isn’t done, it’s not getting done
and no one will ever know otherwise” offered
Nathan.
At 6pm the venue was jam packed with
140 of the couple’s closest family and friends
as “All You Need Is Love” from the “Across
the Universe” soundtrack played over the
sound system. The wedding party walked
down the aisle consisting of Best Man John
Marshall, Katie McVey, Best Man Nicholas
Ritz, Sarah Steege, Ryan Adams, Sara Froehle,
Will Hays and Dane Hays. Alden walked
down the aisle first accompanies by Lori
Becker and Kelley Fisher, his best man’s
moms, followed by Nathan and his parents
Mike and Nancy Ritz. The personalized
ceremony was facilitated and written by
one of the couples closest friends, Mike ‘Aunt
Mike’ Aguilar. Laughter and tears sprinkled
the ceremony, and the audience erupted in
applause as the couple sealed their marriage
with a kiss, as the Beetles “Here Comes the
Sun” began to play.
“The reception was the best time ever”
said Alden. “I had more fun dancing with my
family and friends than I have ever had in my
entire life, it was an amazing feeling of love
and support, and the world outside the walls
didn’t exist for one night!” The couple had
planned their first dance song to be “I want
to Hold Your Hand” from Glee, as performed
by the openly gay character Curt. “This was
the most nerve-racking part of the night, as
we had never really slow-danced with each
other before,” said Nathan. Half way through
the song the couple was joined by other
married couples to symbolize the support
system they had around them.
Nathan and Alden Ritz are now mapping
out their life’s journey together. They will
close on their new Home on August 1, where
they hope to bring the addition of another,
smaller Ritz home in the future.
BRIDES & GROOMS update
In recent contract negotiations with
Cool Fire Originals and Pilgrim Films &
Television about my Iowa-based reality
docu-drama “BRIDES & GROOMS”, things
took a slightly different direction with the
fact of BRAVO coming into the mix… along
with another exclusive contract with these
big boys!
The show is being re-tooled and diversified to include high-end special events,
private parties and heterosexual wedding
couples here in our great state, as well.
What it really boils down to is for a larger
mainstream demographic to be introduced to
gay culture and gay weddings in the Mid-West.
The six previously-filmed gay weddings will
still be a small part of the first few episodes,
but now also they will include footage and
dialog of me with political leaders at political
events that took place this past year and year
ahead in Iowa, straight weddings and events
and my dysfunctional family, social circles
and volunteer-gigs throughout the year.
In chatting with the VPs of both production companies, they really liked what they
saw, but don’t feel 100% gay content will
work. (Except for on the LOGO Network, and
I personally think we deserve a larger market
share with national visibility… just sayin’!) And Tim Brietbach, EVP, from Cool Fire
Media, in St. Louis (who was responsible
for the creation and filming of the “BRIDES
& GROOMS” pilot) as well as his mentor
and partner, Johnny Gould at Pilgrim Films
& Television in Los Angeles, couldn’t agree
more.
Johnny Gould serves as Vice President,
Program and Business Development, at
Pilgrim Films and Television, heading up
the company’s original programming, international format sales and acquisitions, and
new business development divisions. He is
charged with growing Pilgrim Films and
Television’s production slate, as well as overseeing the day-to-day activities of the development and casting departments. In 2006,
he joined Pilgrim full-time. During his tenure
at Pilgrim, Johnny has overseen an array of
non-scripted and reality programming, as
well as the development of network primetime television specials, including what lies
ahead for us here in Iowa, later this fall! These
guys are genuine, kind-hearted, and believe
in our struggle for acceptance, and I truly feel
like they have my back.
Beau Fodor is an Iowa wedding planner
who focuses specifically on weddings
for the LGBT community. He is also
the host of the new docu-reality show
“BRIDES & GROOMS”, which is co-produced
by Pilgrim Films and Coolfire Media,
and will be premiering this winter on
cable television. Beau can be reached
through iowasgayweddingplanner.com or
gayweddingswithpanache.com.
So, there’s the REAL back story… and
especially since no one is more anxious to
get this on than me, I’m grateful for the finetuning, editing, and re-tweaking and know
these men really like me and have my best
interests at heart!
So, along with me, trust this process,
be patient, as the best is yet to come and
Iowa will get much more than just its 15
minutes!!!
APRIL 2011
the fun guide
ACCESSline Page 19
ACCESSline Page 20
the fun guide
APRIL 2011
Morgan Fairchild: Her Gay Love Story interview by Chris Azzopardi
Actress on new film and
her latest role—as fairy
godmother
It’s no stretch really that Morgan
Fairchild’s latest role as a wise waitress
in the queer-themed romantic-comedy
eCupid has her trying to connect two gay
men. She’s been connecting with gay people
her whole life, even before the bombshellwith-brains went lesbian for Sandra Bernhard on Roseanne.
Recently, Fairchild talked about her
eCupid and Roseanne roles, and how much
progress we’ve made with LGBT characters. The 61-year-old also chatted about
breaking the AIDS stigma in the ‘80s, why
actresses over 40 can’t find work, and how
her Twitter followers get more than they
bargain for.
Essentially you play the fairy
godmother of the gays in eCupid.
Yeah, that’s my role in life. (Laughs)
How did you get involved in the
movie?
They offered it to me, and so I read the
script and I thought it was really cute. It’s
a traditional romantic comedy with two
guys instead of a guy and a girl, and I’m
just a big supporter of the LGBT community being treated equally—that they have
real lives, that they can be cute, that it all
doesn’t have to be strange and dark stories,
or even sexy stories. This one is just a light
romantic comedy that could’ve been done
in the ‘30s.
You make a good point. So many gay
films, especially in the ‘80s and ‘90s,
were about AIDS and, well, AIDS.
Yeah, AIDS—or bathhouses, guys in
leather and a lot of S&M. (Laughs) I have
so many gay friends and relatives, and I’ve
been involved in the theater since I was
10—all my friends were always gay. There
are a lot of different kinds of people, so I
was just happy to see a cute movie that just
happens to be gay.
The detective series I did with Chad
Allen, Shock to the System, was the same
kind of thing. It’s a detective story with a
guy who comes home to his lover who’s gay.
I think it’s very important to show a broad
spectrum of emotions and lifestyles—just
people living their lives.
Are you doing any other gay-themed
projects?
I’m getting ready to do one right now
called Happy Ending, and it’s not exactly
gay-themed, but it’s sort of. I don’t even
know if I’m allowed to talk about it yet, but
I’ll just say it’s an interesting story about a
woman who comes to terms with her life
and has an affair with another woman who
isn’t gay—ostensibly they’re both straight
but end up having an affair that becomes
very meaningful and changes both of their
lives. So to me, that’s gay themed, but I
don’t know if the director actually thinks
it is. (Laughs)
It’s a really nice script, and that’s what
you’re always looking for—good stories
being told of all kinds, whether it’s drama
or comedy, or a romantic comedy where
people just happen to be gay. It’s the same
way in real life. I mean, so many conservative people would be shocked to know
that friends of theirs are gay and just have
normal lives.
They always say everyone knows at
least one gay person.
God, I know millions! A lot of my fan
base has always been gay, and I just grew
up around everybody being gay, so I’ve
known since a very early age that the gay
and lesbian friends that I had were exactly
the same as the others. They went through
the same heartache; they had the same
hope and aspirations. Everything was the
same—except the sexual orientation.
In eCupid, you play a wise waitress
who dishes relationship tips to two gay
men. Do people come to you for advice
often?
You never tell anyone how to run their
life, and I don’t feel called upon to jump in
and tell people how to do it either unless
I’m asked. But even if asked, I think you
can only make suggestions and offer your
own experience: “You know, when I was
younger I got into something like this and
here’s how I handled it for better or for
APRIL 2011
worse—and it worked out well, or it didn’t.”
If it didn’t, I’d advise you not to do it that
way! (Laughs)
Good advice! You also have expert
gay-dar in the film. Are you good at spotting the gays?
I grew up with gay guys, so I’m pretty
good at it. I actually had one friend who
was a magazine publisher who was dating
all these hot women around L.A. and at one
point said, “I have to tell you: I’m gay.” I told
him I knew, and he said, “How do you know
when I didn’t know?!” I said, “I don’t know.
I just knew. I didn’t know you didn’t know.
I thought the women were beards!”
The film also touches on the power
of phone apps on our lives.
I don’t have any apps, so this was all
new to me. I have a very old Samsung that
my young friends laugh at.
Tell me you at least text.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I text. And I’m
on Twitter now. I’m a foreign policy nut,
so I got on Twitter (@morgfair), and I
think some of the people who follow me
get a little disappointed because between
makeup tips, they’re also getting a lot of
Libyan meltdown analyses. I’ve tried to
bring it back a bit because some of the
people who follow me are foreign policy
nuts and then some are just fans who just
want hair and makeup tips.
In the ‘90s you played Sandra Bernhard’s bisexual girlfriend on Roseanne.
How far have we come with gay characters on TV?
We’ve come a long way since then. That
was very breakthrough when I did that,
which I wanted it to be. When they offered
the fun guide
it to me, I knew that the last person in the
world that anybody would see walking
through that door after the big buildup
of “Sandra has a new girlfriend” would be
Morgan Fairchild. That’s the last person
they’d expect. But I think we’ve come a long
way, and we’re getting away from stereotyping and just seeing people as people.
How did that role change your
career?
Oh, it didn’t really—except that a lot
of people then thought I was a lesbian! I
even had my lawyer say, “I know you’ve
been with your boyfriend for a lot of years,
but has something changed?” (Laughs) But
that’s how weird Hollywood is. You just
have to say, “No, I believe in stepping out
and being iconoclast and breaking barriers
and opening up the world for people.”
It’s the reason I took such a very strong
stand on AIDS early on. I’m a virus nut,
and my hobbies are emerging viruses and
epidemiology. So I knew a lot about the
virus when Rock Hudson was announced
as being sick, and I knew I was the only
celebrity they had who could go on Nightline and explain what a retrovirus is and
how it works and try to take the stigma off
the disease and try to get it treated just like
a disease and not a “gay disease.” I spent a
lot of the ‘80s and ‘90s doing that.
Do you think the stigma still
exists?
No, not nearly like it did. But I spent a
lot of time trying to break those barriers
down and eventually was joined by other
people. When I started doing it, everybody
told me not to get involved because it was
too controversial, but I knew somebody had
to—and I was the only famous face they
had who could talk knowledgably about
the disease at the time.
What made you passionate about
AIDS?
I’m a virus nut. I was following AIDS
since ‘79 or ‘80 when it was 13 cluster
cases of Kaposi’s sarcoma in New York and
didn’t have a name, and it was just these
odd anomalies. Then there were 11 cluster
cases of Pneumocystis pneumonia in San
Francisco and I thought that was odd. These
were just little paragraphs in the newspapers, and then it came out that they were
all in gay men—and I knew something new
was out there.
Did you lose a lot of your friends to
the virus?
Oh yeah. I lost a ton of people, and a
lot of them I tried to warn that there was
something new out there. I had warned
one friend of mine who was an actor and
sort of closeted, though I knew he was gay.
I was very concerned about him because
I knew he would do drugs and get drunk
and party a lot then go home with anybody.
At an AIDS fundraiser I was sponsoring
in Beverly Hills, he came over to me and
he said, “You were the first person I ever
heard say the word AIDS, and I wish I had
listened.”
You’ve played many roles on TV, in
film and in commercials. What gets you
recognized the most?
It depends on the generation. Older
people tend to remember the series that I
did—the three series I did in the ‘80s—and
some people still remember me from
Search for Tomorrow from the ‘70s. Certain
ACCESSline Page 21
generations love the first TV movie I did
called The Initiation of Sarah, and then
Flamingo Road. Younger people tend to
love the Friends or Old Navy stuff, or even
right now with Chuck. People who go to a
lot of theater are big fans of some of the
theater work I’ve done. It just depends on
what generation they are from.
Do you still get free fleece?
Oh no, honey, I didn’t get free fleece
then!
For more information on the film, including release dates, visit ecupidthemovie.com.
Photos courtesy of J.C. Calciano.
ACCESSline Page 22
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Cocktail Chatter by Ed Sikov
Heads in the Clouds: The
Aviation
“So, mutatis mutandis, the LGBT
community…” Ted was lecturing about
marriage equality from his podium on
our living room couch.
“What?” I blurted. Cocktail “hour” was
pushing 90 minutes. I should have served
the lamb stew and couscous already, but
I couldn’t get out of the chair.
“The gay community must shift its
praxis from the dystopic to the…”
“No, before that. You said ‘mucous
mucandies.’ What the hell does that
mean?”
“You have a Ph.D. and you don’t know
what mutatis mutandis means?” He was
appalled.
“F--k you,” I explained.
We’ve been doing this for years. We’re
all academics or ex-academics. Dan has
three degrees—B.A., MBA, and Ph.D.—
all from Harvard. I have a Ph.D. from
Columbia; Ted has one from Princeton
and teaches at NYU; his partner, Eric,
has an M.F.A. from Columbia and taught
at Wellesley but now writes screenplays
that actually get made into movies. You
may have caught the farcical Brainiacs
on cable; Eric wrote it. This dinner party
demonstrated where he got his material.
We were flying on Aviations. I was in
avast liquor emporium on the Upper East
Side last week—I rarely go up there, since
I’m deathly allergic to cashmere sweaters and simple strands of pearls—and
saw Creme de Violette on the shelf with
a little printed recipe for the Aviation.
Maraschino, was nearby. I bought both.
By Maraschino, I don’t mean the
syrup in which innocent cherries are
drowned in artificially
flavored, carcinogenically colored sugar
water so children can
have their first drug
rushes. I mean the
clear cherry liqueur,
which Italians make
from Marasca cherries and their crushed
pits. Et la Creme de
Violette? Yes, it’s really
made from violets and
thus wins the title of
The Gayest Liqueur Ever, there being no
Creme de Pansy.
I played around with the recipes
I found online at the marvelous blog
sippetysup.com, where I learned that
the drink has the reputation of being a
1930s cocktail, but it actually dates from
1916, when only a few people ever saw
an airplane, let alone flew in one.
In those days, flying into the sky in a
technological wonder seemed miraculous.
The Aviation celebrates that magic. It has
by far the loveliest color of any cocktail
I’ve ever seen—watercolor-pale lavender.
And it’s extraordinarily luscious.
Now that air travel is like taking the
bus, except that the bus is on time, the
aeroplanes’s early thrill is long gone.
Unless, of course, you make yourself and
your smarty-pants friends Aviations,
in which case you’ll all quickly be even
higher than your IQs.
The Aviation
(a variation on the classic)
Note: Martini glasses are much larger
now than they were
in the early 20th
century. This recipe
fills one 2011 glass
or two old-style
glasses.
“… Anyway, there
were bottles of frozen
flavored vodka on each
table, and the first
table that finished
one got some weird
Russian prize. Every—
body was snockered.”
• Half-cup of Beefeater gin
• 1 tablespoon lemon
juice
• 1 tablespoon Maraschino
• 1-and-a-half teaspoon Creme de
Violette
• Half-teaspoon “really” simple syrup (mix
equal parts sugar and water in a jar and
shake until the sugar dissolves)
1.Chill the martini glass(es).
2.Put all ingredients into a cocktail shaker
and chill in the freezer for five or 10
minutes.
3.Take glass(es) and shaker out, add a few
ice cubes to the shaker, and shake as
though your life depended on it. Strain
into the frosty glass(es) and hope that a
few shards of ice rise to the top.
Lenivbli Malioik, or
The La-Z-Boy
Here’s some advice: You need a
restaurant manager as a close friend.
Why? Because when
you go to his restaurant, he’ll tell the chef
to send out all sorts
of delightful little
plates of things and
an extra dessert or
two, none of which you
will pay for. You have
ten lawyer friends;
they’ll all charge you.
Twenty doctors? Not
one lousy discount.
But one restaurant
manager? Suddenly
you’re Auntie Mame—
“Life’s a banquet, and most poor suckers
are starving to death!”
Our Fire Island housemates, Ian and
Frankie, are both (as Ian put it) “lifers in
food service.” Ian’s the quiet one, Frankie
the Big Flaming Mary. Dan and I had
dinner last week at Frankie’s restaurant,
Capryce. We ordered the pumpkin soup;
out came peekytoe crab mini-tacos from
the chef. Dan ordered the hanger steak,
I the paella, but we also got a chef-sent
plate of glazed duck, foie gras, and Asianspiced carrots.
Frankie kept coming over to our booth
to chat. Capryce was jammed. Hoards
jostled in the entryway, but Frankie found
in us a rapt audience and casually handed
the pesky crowd control problem to his
panicking assistant. Frankie was busy
Et la Creme de
Violette? Yes, it’s
really made from
violets and thus wins
the title of The Gayest
Liqueur Ever, there
being no Creme de
Pansy.
telling us about a baroque wedding he
and Ian had gone to in Brighton Beach.
Once populated mainly by Jewish refugees from WWII, it’s now Moscow on
the Atlantic. (Yes, the southern boundary of Brooklyn is the Atlantic Ocean: a
real beach, with white sand and surfers.
If you’re lucky, you’ll
see a hot surfer dude
carrying his board on
the subway.)
The wedding was
an over-the-top spectacle as only Russians
think up. The reception
began with a dramatic
caviar bar; multicolored spotlights hit the
different iced bowls of
roe while sexy little
Russian-American
kittens crisscrossed
the room with trays
of Veuve Cliquot. For the main course,
tuxedoed waiters paraded flaming meats
around the room on swords before
carving and serving them. For dessert
there were sharlotkas and zapekankas
galore, all a mere prelude to a vast, gaudy
wedding cake that featured—Frankie
wasn’t kidding and neither am I—a most
realistic portrait in icing of Zac Efron.
High School Musical was the 19-year-old
bride’s favorite film of forever. (Note to
self: when gay marriage is legal in N.Y.
State, order cake with icing rendering
of Janet Leigh being stabbed to death in
the shower.)
“And the whole time… What? … I’ll be
back.” Frankie flew off like a hyper parakeet. He returned minutes later. “Sister
Rose Gertrude—that’s what I call Carl,
the sous chef—set the kitchen on fire.
He’s an ex-Marine. Anyway, there were
bottles of frozen flavored vodka on each
table, and the first table that finished one
got some weird Russian prize. Everybody
was snockered. Huh? Gotta go. Don’t order
the shortcake—it’s poo-sniggles.”
For once, my mind wasn’t on dessert.
I was contemplating frozen vodka. I work
too hard mixing drinks, I concluded.
Guests arrive, I’m making a three-course
dinner, and suddenly I’m fielding cocktail
orders and getting multiple shakers going.
What’s wrong with me? From now on we’ll
have Absolut Peppar in the freezer, and if
somebody wants a drink, I’ll say “We’re
having La-Z-Boys.” “What’s that?” “It’s a
classic Russian cocktail enjoyed by czars
and Bolsheviki alike. There’s a bottle
of flavored Absolut in the freezer. Help
yourself. Budem zdorovy!”
Lenivbli Malioik, or The La-Z-Boy
1.Stick a bottle of flavored Absolut in
the freezer.
2.Serve.
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Out of Town: Road-Tripping Across Spain by Andrew Collins
As a road-tripping destination for LGBT
travelers, there may not be a better place
to go in Europe than Spain. It’s relatively
economical and easy to drive through this
increasingly progressive country, that
legalized gay marriage in 2005. It is dotted
with cities and resorts popular with gay
vacationers, and drives between key destinations often reveal stunning views of the
Mediterranean, high desert mesas and
snowcapped mountaintops.
I rented a car with a friend last summer
and embarked on a two-week road-trip
covering the eastern two-thirds of the
country—I missed the regions near the
Portuguese border and north along the
Atlantic (including Bilbao, which I’m eager
to visit). But with just 14 days, my friend and
I knew we had to exercise. We still managed
to visit about a dozen towns and cities, some
for the afternoon and others for two or
three nights. All told, we drove roughly the
distance between San Diego and Vancouver.
It was a great adventure—my first serious
extended driving trip in Europe.
Here’s a quick recap of our trip, which
commenced in Barcelona in the northeast
and ended in Malaga along the Costa del Sol,
along with tips about planning a similar trip
yourself to Spain or elsewhere in Europe.
We started in Barcelona, and I recommend beginning—and possibly ending—
any European road trip with larger cities in
which you plan to spend a few nights. Obviously, big cities have more international
direct flights to choose from. They’re also
usually easy to get to explore without a car.
In fact, as they tend to generate plenty of
traffic and have expensive parking, they’re
better visited without a car. We spent our
first three days in Barcelona without wheels
(this included a day trip to the gay resort
town of Sitges, which is extremely easy to
reach by train), saving money and hassle.
From Barcelona our route across Spain
looked a bit like a backwards “Z”—southwest to Madrid with a stop in Zaragoza (the
heart of Aragonese Spain), then southeast
to Valencia detouring for the afternoon to
Cuenca, a stunning ancient city renowned
for its 15th-century “hanging houses,” one
of which now contains a respected contemporary art museum.
Here you can see a big advantage to
driving—it allowed us to make impromptu
detours to a variety of places we’d never
have considered visiting had we been
traveling by plane or even by train or bus.
Without having to adhere to timetables or
figure out public transportation logistics,
we were able to make the most of our time,
and even choose some wonderfully scenic
routes. It helps that I love both driving and
navigating (for this I relied solely on GPS and
Google Maps on my Verizon smart phone,
which has global roaming—unlimited data
plans cost about $2 a day).
From Valencia we turned down the
Costa Blanca to Alicante (spending that
night in nearby Elche), then followed the
sea through the only forgettable part of
our trip—the bland, condo-infested resort
of Torrevieja. But we soon cut inland and
up through the spectacular Sierra Nevada
mountains to reach Moorish grandeur of
Granada, where we spent the better part
of the following day exploring the fabled
Alhambra Palace (see photo).
Granada’s legendary Alhambra fortress clings to a hillside in the foothills of the Sierra Nevada. Photo by Andrew Collins.
We then continued west through
Spain’s Andalusian countryside to the
romantic city of Sevilla, and after two nights
there cut southeast over the mountains
to the Costa del Sol—stopping for a few
hours in the picturesque cliff-top village
of Ronda—before continuing to another of
Spain’s top gay vacation spots, Torremolinos. We spent two final nights in Malaga, a
somewhat underrated coastal city of about
570,000 with a lively Old City rife with
sidewalk cafes, shops, and a smattering of
gay establishments.
Leading destination
Spain has become southern Europe’s
leading destination for LGBT vacationers, especially travelers from the United
Kingdom, Germany, Scandinavia, and other
northern European nations. Barcelona and
Madrid are tops among the big cities for
gay travel, with Seville equally popular,
though less for its gay scene and more for
its celebration of Andalusian culture and
cuisine. Valencia and Malaga possess more
modest gay scenes but are also well worth
visiting. Granada has a limited but fun
gay scene for a city its size (240,000), and
Alicante was probably the biggest surprise
for me. This seaside resort city on the Costa
Blanca supports an extremely vibrant gay
following (especially with British visitors)
and contains more LGBT nightlife options
than much larger cities like Valencia or
Seville.
Among resort communities, tiny Sitges
and Torremolinos have gay bars, resorts,
and vacation rentals galore, as do two other
communities that you must reach by plane
or boat: Gran Canaria, which is the second
most populous of the Canary Islands, a
2.5-hour flight from Madrid, and the famed
party haven of Ibiza, just an hour by plane
from Barcelona.
As with Barcelona, a car is arguably
more bother than benefit in big cities like
Madrid, Seville and Valencia. If you’re visiting these cities for more than two or three
days, it’s worth ditching your rental car at
the airport, and renting a new one when
you leave. In our case, we stuck the rental
car in a garage when we arrived, and picked
it up again upon departing.
The 25 to 30 euros per night we spent
on parking was still a better deal to us than
constantly returning and renting new cars,
which would have required taxi rides and
wasting time getting to and from rental
agencies. Also, it’s cheaper to rent weekly
than daily, so having the car for a full 11 days
worked out more economically than had we
rented different cars for two or three days
at a time. Finally, having the one car with
us the entire trip allowed us to leave some
of our belongings in the trunk.
It’s worth noting that car theft is
a significant issue in Spain, but you’re
unlikely to be affected by it if you exercise
prudence—park in secure garages, store
nothing in a part of the car that’s visible
through the window, and keep no valuables
in the car. We left only non-valuable belongings in our car when unattended, and we
stored them in a concealed trunk.
Over the 11 days we paid $380 (including all taxes and a roughly $70 surcharge
for returning the car in a different city) for
a mid-size car, which I booked on Expedia
from Dollar Rent-A-Car a few weeks in
advance. We saved money renting a manualtransmission car, not only because rates
for these are far lower in Europe than for
automatics, but because they get better gas
mileage. It cost about $50 to fill the tank.
We did run into some steeply priced toll
highways (about $30 from Barcelona to
Zaragoza, for example—they all take Visa
and MasterCard), but many other major
highways in Spain were toll-free.
We also paid extra for international
auto insurance, which is a must. Most
U.S. policies don’t cover international car
rentals, and credit card companies typically don’t either, but it’s important that
you first contact these companies before
you decide to rent a car to find out what
sort of coverage you might already have. I
purchased comprehensive auto insurance
through Expedia for a very reasonable $11
per day.
Including rental rates, insurance, gas,
parking, and tolls, we spent a comparable
amount to what we would have for a similar
road-trip in the United States
Again, road-tripping in foreign
countries—especially those known for
aggressive drivers, poor roads, or intense
traffic—isn’t for everybody. Spain is a relatively easy country to drive in. There’s an
extensive network of high-speed, limitedaccess highways, gas stations are prolific,
and even in smaller town roads are usually
in good shape. And you’re comfortable
behind the wheel driving in new places, it’s
a great destination for road-tripping.
If driving is less your cup of tea, but
you’d still like to tour multiple cities in
Spain, consider flying among a few key
destinations—such as Barcelona, Madrid,
Seville, and Malaga—and using buses or
trains for side trips. Another option is to
buy a Spain Eurail Pass (eurail.com), and
rely on solely on trains to get around.
A final thought: we visited in July
because it best suited out schedule, but
summer is typically the most expensive
time to fly to Spain from the U.S., and the
weather can be stiflingly hot. In interior
cities like Madrid and Seville, we routinely
encountered daytime highs above 100
degrees, but with low humidity. Along the
coast, daytime highs hovered around the
80s, but higher humidity made it feel hotter.
Travel around Spain in fall or spring, and
you’ll likely enjoy milder weather, fewer
crowds and better rates on flights, hotels
and car rentals. Winter is a decent value
in cities, but it’s high season in coastal
resort areas.
For more on visiting Spain, check out
the official national tourism website (spain.
info) along with the very helpful site on gay
travel in Spain, gayiberia.com.
Andrew Collins covers gay travel for the
New York Times-owned website About.com
and is the author of Fodor’s Gay Guide to the
USA. He can be reached care of this publication or at [email protected].
ACCESSline Page 26
the fun guide
APRIL 2011
Book Worm Sez by Terri Schlichenmeyer
“It’s All Relative”
by Wade Rouse
289 pages
©2011, Crown
$23.99 / $26.99 CAN
You’ve got half a year, more or less.
It’s going to take that long to recover
from the last round of family holidays and
to get used to the next Forced March of
Togetherness. You’ll need time to forget
about the angst that comes from spending
more than 20 minutes in the presence of
loonies, grumps, loudmouths, and old Uncle
Epp, who annually fails to remember that
Across
1 Went down (on)
5 Sleek swimmer
10 Elizabeth of Transamerica
14 Burning software
15 Safari head
16 River of Ulrichs’ country
17 Movie about garden dwarfs
20 Contemporary of Bela
21 Kind of reunion
22 Reagan prog.
23 John of Gay Sex Quotes
25 Wander (about)
26 Kelly Clarkson and Will Young, e.g.
28 Formal order
30 Dark red gem
31 His music is featured in 17-Across
35 Free verse “rhyme scheme”
38 News source of old
39 Garfield’s whipping boy
43 Gamboling area
44 Gay neighborhood of New York
46 Off-rd. transport
47 Bette’s All About Eve role
49 Atlantic crosser of old
50 Furnish food for festivities
52 Role played by a man named Julia
54 Queen of mysteries
55 What 31-Across called himself on Today
59 Slightly
61 Bear
62 Tool points
65 Jerry Herman musical
66 Joan of Arc keepsake
67 As to
68 Kind of pressure
69 Little bikers in a Gay Pride march
70 Top target
you outgrew that “got yer nose” bit several
decades ago.
You’ve got half a year to steel yourself,
because you’d never even consider spending
holidays away from kin—and neither would
Wade Rouse. In his new memoir “It’s All
Relative”, he writes about family, celebrations, and fiercely loving both.
Who among us hasn’t endured some
unique holidays in our lifetimes? Remember,
for instance, the Christmas when… well,
some things are best forgotten. Others
should be remembered for the lessons they
imparted.
Let’s start at the beginning.
New Year’s Eve is usually a time to start
fresh with resolutions and a new calendar
empty with possibilities.
But sometimes, an unexpected moment portends all
the possibilities we’ll need
for the rest of our lives.
Valentine’s Day, for the
gifting-impaired, can be
laden with angst—whether
we’re first-graders handing
out cheap paper cards
or grown-ups choosing a
romantic offering that falls
flat. The important thing, though—and the
hardest to remember when faced with an
awful Valentine—is that the meaning behind
a bad present is sometimes the real gift.
On Mother’s Day, we pay homage to
Q-PUZZLE: “Star-cross’d Garden Dwarfs”
Down
1 Avoided going straight
2 Poe poem
3 Song by 51-Across
4 Member of an average threesome
5 It’s in the winds
Dear Old Mom: she who
made weird Halloween
costumes and who stood
up to Dad when he needed
it. And sometimes, she
stands up to us when we
need it, too.
And then there are the
holidays we make bigger
than life, and that forever
stick out in our minds:
the St. Patrick’s Day spent
with green body paint, the Secretary’s Day
we learned that we’re nobody’s “type”, the
romantic vacation that ended with a question mark. The Memorial Day when past
mysteries become crystal-clear. Be Kind
to Animals Months that aren’t so kind to
our hearts.
Family Game Nights.
Final Christmases.
Still smarting from the last disastrous
holiday? Yep, we’ve all had them and “It’s
All Relative” is empathetic—to a point—and
surprisingly bawdy.
Author Wade Rouse has a way of
making us laugh. He writes of life with his
eccentric family and his partner, Gary, who
is deeply romantic and Rouse’s perfect
opposite. Rouse isn’t afraid to be the bad
guy in his books, and that self-depreciating
honesty is hilarious.
But beware.
Rouse is quick with his wit, but he has
the amazing ability to turn tears of laughter
into tears of emotion in the space of twenty
words. He knows how to make a funnybone
tingle, but he also knows well how to charge
a moment with feeling.
If you’re staring at a family gettogether any time soon, this book is a nice
nudge toward grace and gratitude. “It’s All
Relative” is, in fact, a book to add to your
calendar soon.
6 Sound from guitarist Townshend
7 Patty Hearst’s SLA name
8 Rear follower
9 Indian chief
10 VIP of DC, e.g.
11 Light heavyweight
12 Tease
13 Keith Haring, for example
18 Waters of the blues
19 Heep of fiction
24 Rep in the ‘hood
27 Bond’s first foe
29 Emulate Paul Cadmus
30 Myra Breckinridge writer Vidal
32 Shaft output
33 Zips
34 Fool around
35 Coloratura Gluck
36 Bit of sweat
37 Competition with four queens
40 “You busy Friday night?” e.g.?
41 Caligula’s way
42 “Climb ___ Mountain”
44 Lake of Lombardy
45 Sometime defender of gay rights
48 Mate of a heterosexual goose
51 Gay marriage advocate Morissette
53 On the ball
54 Boardroom VIPs
56 Heed a master
57 Liquid ___
58 _Nurse Jackie_ protrayer
59 Part of Etheridge’s equipment
60 ___ kwon do
63 Cross-dresser’s padding site
64 Group of games, for Mauresmo
• SOLUTION ON PAGE 28
APRIL 2011
the fun guide
ACCESSline Page 27
HARPIST
INSURANCE
PHOTOGRAPHER
QUAD CITIES: MASSAGE
CEDAR RAPIDS: WINE & GIFTS
ACCESSline Page 28
the fun guide
CONCESSIONS
EVENTS
love, compassion and peace not what Jesus
taught or did we forget that too?
What is wrong with allowing one’s
spouse to visit each other at a hospital, to be
able to provide for each other’s well being or
to be able to bequeath without issue to their
spouse? What is wrong with being able to
raise a family that is full of love, understanding, and respects hard work? What is wrong
with giving a child a chance with a good,
law-abiding home that will provide and care
for the needs of the child rather than endless
rejections? What is wrong with service to
our country by someone who is queer? No
mission has ever been compromised when
someone came out as gay.
There is something wrong with an empty
chair at Thanksgiving dinner for brother or
sister who was not welcomed because they
were queer. There is something wrong with
an empty chair at the dinner table because
someone was bashed to death because of
being queer. Where did Jesus teach this? We
cannot give any more concessions of liberty
and family.
Segregation and discrimination have
real and lasting effects upon people. We
cannot subject one part of society to inferiority (publicly or privately) without negative
effects against the whole society. If we are
so concerned about marriage in America,
why don’t we promote love and family over
hate and discrimination? Let love flourish in
the hearts of couples and let discrimination
and hatred go away. Let us be a nation and
a state that truly promotes family, love, fairness, equality, sacrifice, and compassion. Give
thanks for the rights we have, but remember
that those liberties are everyone’s rather
than a few.
Every Tuesday, ACE HAS FACE THE MUSIC &
DANCE, 7-9pm, 26 E Market St, Iowa City, IA 52245.
All skill levels are welcome. Tango, Waltz, Disco,
Country, American social dance, Latin, a mix from
the last 100 years. Join on Facebook at http://www.
facebook.com/group.php?gid=372454708295. For
more info, contact ACE experiment at 319-8538223. [ L G B T M W A ]
First and Third Tuesday, YOUTH FOR EQUALITY, 4-6pm, The CENTER, 1300 W Locust St, Des
Moines, IA 50309. A service and action group for
youth who identify as LGBTQI and their allies.
Open to all students in grades 5 through 12. [ L G
BTMWA]
Second Tuesday of the Month, PITCH HIV+
PEER-TO-PEER SUPPORT GROUP, 6-8pm, The
CENTER, 1300 Locust St, Des Moines, IA . Contact
John at 515.284.3358 with questions. [ + ]
Wednesday
1st Wednesday of the Month, CEDAR RAPIDS
CHARTER CHAPTER OF THE AMERICAN BUSINESS WOMEN’S ASSOCIATION, For more info, visit
charter-chapter.tripod.com. [ L W ]
1st Wednesday of the Month, WOMEN’S
SACRED CIRCLE, 6:30-8 PM, Prairiewoods
Franciscan Spirituality Center, 120 E. Boyson Rd,
Hiawatha, IA 52233. This group is for women who
are interested in gathering for spiritual growth. The
direction and activities of the group are determined
by participants. $5 per session. For more info, visit
www.prairiewoods.org. [ L W ]
1st Wednesday of the Month, CONNECTIONS’
RAINBOW READING GROUP, 7 PM, Iowa City
Public Library Meeting Room B, 123 South Linn
Street, Iowa City, IA 52240. For more info, contact
Todd at: [email protected]. [ L G B T M W A ]
2nd Wednesday of the Month, STONEWALL
DEMOCRATS, THE GLBT CAUCUS OF THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY, 6:30-8 PM, For more info, contact
Harvey Ross at [email protected] or call
319-389-0093. [ L G B T M W A ]
2nd Wednesday of the Month, WOMEN FOR
PEACE KNITTERS, 7-9 PM, Hiawatha, IA . at Prairiewoods, 120 E. Boyson Rd., Hiawatha. Knitting,
crocheting, and discussion. For more info, call
319-377-3252 or go to www.womenforpeaceiowa.org. All ages and levels of needlework skills
welcome. Come knit for charities. [ L W ]
Every Wednesday, HOT MESS EXPRESS,
8:00pm, Des Moines Social Club, 1408 Locust St.,
Des Moines, IA . The hottest most messiest citizens
of Des Moines providing a comedic look at the
hottest most messiest current events around the
world. Featuring: Paul Selberg, Rachel C. Johnson,
Kelley Robinson & Tyler Reedy [ L G B T A ]
Every Wednesday, U OF I GAY LESBIAN
BISEXUAL TRANSGENDER AND ALLIES UNION
MEETINGS, 7-9 PM, Iowa City, IA . at the Penn
State Room #337 of the Iowa Memorial Union,
U. of Iowa campus, Iowa City. For more info,
visit http://www.uiowa.edu/~glbtau/ or e-mail
[email protected]. These meetings are open to
the public. [ L G B T M W A ]
First and Third Wednesday of the Month,
PITCH HIV+ PEER-TO-PEER SUPPORT GROUP,
Friends and Children’s Council, 500 E 4th St, Ste
414, Waterloo, IA . RSVP to [email protected]
(requested but not required). (First meeting will
be January 19, 2011 from 5:30-7:30pm at the CASS
office, 2101 Kimball Ave, Ste 401, Waterloo.) [ + ]
Second Wednesday, OUT NETWORKING,
5:30, Des Moines Social Club, 1408 Locust St, Des
Moines, IA 50309. A social, business, and philanthropic networking organization for anyone who
is lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered, questioning or supportive. The group presents year-round
events focused on business, culture, community,
and philanthropic subjects. [ L G B T A ]
well. No specific spiritual practice is followed. This
event is always open to newcomers. For more info,
call 319-643-2613, or e-mail spirit-hill@earthlink.
net. Calling in advance is highly recommended
to confirm the location for the specific month of
interest. [ L W ]
2nd Thursday of the Month, OPEN MIC WITH
MARY MCADAMS, 7-9 PM, Des Moines, IA . at
Ritual Café, on 13th St. between Locust and Grand,
downtown Des Moines. Visit www.ritualcafe.com.
For more info, e-mail [email protected].
[LGBTMWA]
2nd Thursday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG
OMAHA/COUNCIL BLUFFS CHAPTER MEETING,
7 PM (6:30 PM social time), Omaha, IA . at Mead
Hall, First United Methodist Church, 7020 Cass St.,
Omaha. For more info, call 402-291-6781. [ L G B
TMWAK]
3rd Thursday of the Month, OPEN MIC
HOSTED BY KIMBERLI, 7-10 PM, Cedar Rapids,
IA . at the Blue Strawberry Coffee Company (now
open after the flood), 118 2nd St. SE, Downtown
Cedar Rapids. Signup at 6:30 p.m. or by e-mailing
[email protected] the week prior to the
open mic. [ L G B T M W A ]
3rd Thursday of the Month, LGBTQI YOUTH
MOVIE NIGHT AT THE CENTER, 6:30-10pm, The
CENTER, 1300 Locust, Des Moines, IA . This is part
of the LGBTQI youth program, anyone 24 years old
and younger is welcome. Come down spend the
evening with your friends and make some new
ones. 515-243-0313 [ L G B T + ]
3rd Thursday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG
DUBUQUE/TRI-STATE CHAPTER MEETING, 7
PM, Dubuque, IA . at St. John’s Lutheran Church,
1276 White St., Dubuque. For more info, call
563-582-9388. [ L G B T M W A K ]
3rd Thursday of the Month, CONNECTIONS
GAME NIGHT, 7-9 PM, Iowa City, IA . at Donnelly’s
Pub, 110 E. College St., in downtown Iowa City. [ L
GBTMWA]
4th Thursday of the Month, PROFESSIONAL
WOMEN’S NETWORK (PWN), For more info, visit
www.pwn.org, e-mail [email protected], or call Shelley
Woods at 319-981-9887. [ L W ]
4th Thursday of the Month, THE GLBT
READING GROUP, 7:30 PM, Cedar Rapids, IA .
Red Cross Building at 6300 Rockwell Dr. NE, Cedar
Rapids. The group is open to new members; contact
[email protected] for further info. [
LGBTMWA]
Every Thursday and Friday, SHANNON
JANSSEN, 6-10 PM, Cedar Rapids, IA . Dawn’s Hide
and Bead Away, 220 E. Washington St., Iowa City.
Shannon performs a variety of music including
original songs on the Grand Piano in the hotel’s
beautiful atrium. No reservations required. [ L G
BTMWA]
Last Thursday of the Month, DRAG KING
SHOW, 9:00pm-2pm, Studio 13, 13 S. Linn St, Iowa
City, IA 52240. The show starts EARLY at 9pm, so all
you fans under 21 (meaning 19 & 20) can come for
a jam packed hour of show! Your kings will also have
another photo signing with awesome king swag!
Plus, a SECOND mini show after the signing!!! $3
Bomb shots, $2 Calls and Domestics, and $1 Wells
and shots! Cover is only $3! [ L G B T D ]
“Why shouldn’t gay people
be able to live as open and
freely as everybody else? What
it comes down to, ultimately,
is love. How can anything bad
come out of love? The bad stuff
comes out of mistrust, misun—
derstanding and, God knows,
from hate and from ignorance…
During my life I’ve seen many
Friday
things, good and bad, but the
1st Friday of the Month, FAIRFIELD ART
WALK, For more info, visit www.FairfieldArtWalk.
bad things never came out of
com. [ L G B T M W A ]
1st Friday of the Month, GUERRILLA QUEER
loving acts, loving gestures or
BAR MEETUP!, Tired of the same old bars? Crave
the idea of bringing your queer and straight friends
loving relationships. That’s why
together in a fun, new environment? We’re descending upon an unsuspecting straight bar and turning
I’m here tonight—to celebrate
it into a gay bar for the night. To join in: join our
you and your families. And to
Facebook group, Google group or Twitter feed.
You’ll receive an email the morning of each event
tell you to hang in there and to
with the name of a classically hetero bar and the
meeting time. Call your friends, have them call their
say, once and for all of us, long
friends, show up at the bar and watch as it becomes
the new “it” gay bar for one night only. Visit groups.
live love.”
Thursday
google.com/group/iowa-city-guerrilla-queer-bar. [
1st 3rd Thursday, EVENINGS FOR SPIRIT, L G B T M W A ]
—Actress and activist, Eliza- 6:30-8:30 PM, West Branch, IA . at SpiritHill Retreat,
1st Friday of the Month, FIRST FRIDAY
604 Cedar Valley Road, West Branch. First, third, and BREAKFAST CLUB, Sherman Place, 1501 Woodbeth Taylor, at GLAAD’s 11th fifth Thursdays of each month. Women gather at land Avenue, Des Moines, IA 95030. The First
(or other locations) to share our spiritual Friday Breakfast Club (FFBC) is an educational,
Annual Media Awards, April SpiritHill
experiences, visions and longings. The evenings non-profit corporation for gay men who gather on
include time for sharing and time for silence. the first Friday of every month to provide mutual
15, 2000. Rest in peace.
Laughter, tears and singing are often shared as
support, to be educated on community affairs, and
APRIL 2011
to further educate community opinion leaders with
more positive images of gay men. It is the largest
breakfast club in the state of Iowa. Hoyt Sherman
Place, 1501 Woodland Avenue, Des Moines, IA
95030. Contact Jonathan Wilson at (515) 288-2500
or email: [email protected] [ G B ]
1st Friday of the Month, DAWN’S COFFEE
HOUSE, 5-8 PM, Iowa City, IA . Dawn’s Hide and
Bead Away, 220 E. Washington St., Iowa City. First
Friday of every month between February 6 and
December 4. Music and light snacks are provided.
Proceeds from the door are split between the nonprofit of the month and the store (to cover the cost
of snacks). Any other donations received go 100%
to the non-profit. $3 cover. For more info, phone
319-338-1566. [ L G B T M W A ]
2nd and 4th Friday, DRUMMING CIRCLE, 7
PM, Cedar Rapids, IA . Unity Center of Cedar Rapids,
3791 Blairs Ferry Rd. NE, Cedar Rapids. Every 2nd
and 4th Friday of the each month. For more info,
call 319-431-7550. [ G M ]
3rd Friday of the Month, OLD-TIME DANCE
FOR ALL, 8 PM, Iowa City, IA . A Barn Dance 12
miles east of Iowa City at Scattergood Friends
School. A Barn Dance 12 miles east of Iowa City at
Scattergood Friends School. Admission is $5.00 per
person. Singles and couples, beginners and veterans
welcome. The music is live, and all dances are taught
and called (that is, prompted while the music is
playing). Note: (1) same-sex couples are common
at these dances, (2) they’re no-alcohol, no-smoking
events, (3) every dance is taught, so beginners are
welcome, and (4) people can attend alone or with
a partner. People of a variety of ages show up, and
the atmosphere is friendly and inclusive. For more
info, phone 319-643-7600 or e-mail treadway@
netins.net. [ L G B T M W A ]
Saturday
4th Saturday of the Month, LESBIAN BOOK
CLUB, 7 PM, Davenport, IA . is reading books by or
about lesbians. Non-lesbians are welcome to attend.
All meetings are held at the Unitarian Universalist
Church, 3707 Eastern Ave., Davenport. For more
info, call 563-359-0816. [ L ]
4th Saturday of the Month, TANGOVIA, 7:30
PM, Iowa City, IA . join area tango dancers at the
Wesley Center, 120 N. Dubuque St., Iowa City.
Enjoy a candlelit evening of dance, hors d’oeuvres,
and conversation in a relaxed atmosphere. Cost is
$5. Partner not necessary. Beginners welcome to
come at 7 p.m. for an introductory lesson. For more
info, call Gail at 319-325-9630, e-mail irelandg@
gmail.com, or visit www.tangovia.com. [ L G B T
MWAD]
Every Saturday, WOMEN FOR PEACE IOWA,
Noon to 1PM, Collins Rd NE & 1st Ave SE, Cedar
Rapids, IA 52402. hosting Weekly Street Corner
Vigils for peace, rain or shine. Meet at the corner
of 1st Ave. and Collins Rd. SE (in front of Granite
City Brewery), Cedar Rapids. Show your support
for our troops by calling for their return from Iraq.
For more info, e-mail [email protected]. [ L G B
TMWAKD]
Every Saturday, BAILE LATINO: SALSA,
CHA-CHA, MERENGUE AND BACHATA LESSONS,
3:30 PM to 5:30 PM, Cedar Rapids, IA . taught by
Gloria Zmolek, at CSPS, 1103 3rd St. SE, Cedar
Rapids. No experience or partner necessary.
All ages welcome. No sign-up required. $5 per
person requested. For more info, contact Gloria at
319-365-9611 or visit www.crsalsa.org. [ L G B T
MWAKD]
ACCESSline Page 29
Council Bluffs Community Alliance First Friday Breakfast Club:
Calendar for April
Good Eats and Great Community in Elkader
APRIL 2011
by Bruce Carr
BJ’s Get Together
Friday, April 1 at 5:00pm
Location: 3400 W. Broadway, Council
Bluffs, IA 51501
CBCA Annual Meeting / Fund Raiser for
Marriage Equality
Sunday, April 3 at 5:00pm
Location: St. Paul’s Episcopal Church /
Riverside Grill near Harrah’s
Annual Meeting and Senator Gronstal
Fund Raiser
Sunday, April 3 at 5:00pm
Location: St Paul’s Episcopal Church and
Riverside Grill in Council Bluffs
BJ’s Get Together
Bluffs, IA 51501
BJ’s Get Together
Bluffs, IA 51501
GOglbt meeting on April 7 at Joslyn
The Greater Omaha GLBT network
(“GOglbt”) will be holding our next meeting
on April 7th from 5:30 PM - 7:00 PM at Joslyn
Museum (2200 Dodge Street, Omaha NE).
There will be a small presentation followed
by a tour starting at 6pm.
Joslyn is pleased to host The Glory of
the Ukraine, which comprises two distinct
and rarely seen collections: Icons from the
famous churches, cathedrals, bell towers
and underground caverns of the 1,000 year
old Monastery of the Caves and artifacts of
ancient civilizations that populated modern
day Ukraine from the private PlaTar collection. Joslyn is the only U.S. Museum to feature
both components of The Glory of Ukraine!
The mission of GOglbt is to advance
growth and equality for its members,
businesses and allies by providing educational, networking and community-building
opportunities. We typically meet the first
Thursday every month at a travelling location to see the community and be seen.
For more information or to be included
on the e-newsletter list, please email us at
[email protected].
PITCH 2011 Wellness Summit: FindingtheTreasureWithinYourself
The Wellness Summit is a retreat for
Iowans living with HIV/AIDS. Sessions are
picked to empower attendees. Educational
sessions include medication compliance,
tips to taking charge of your health care
appointments, self-empowerment, and
advocacy. Stress reduction workshops
range from yoga, art therapy, and canoeing which encourage relaxation and offer
creative outlets.
The 2011 Wellness Summit will be held
May 13 - 15, 2011 at Camp Wesley Woods
near Indianola. Costs per individual attending the Wellness Summit total $150.00;
we hope you will consider donating and
covering the cost for one Iowan to attend
this important event. Your generosity will
be acknowledged in the Welcome letter, the
PITCH newsletter, pitchiowa.org website.
PITCH booths at various events, and our
Facebook page.
The AIDS Project of Central Iowa has
generously offered to match any funds up
to $1.500.00 that we receive before April
1, 2011. Please help us take advantage of
this offer from The AIDS Project of Central
Iowa.
PITCH is a non-profit organization
with a clear mission: To create an atmosphere where HIV+ people can unite and
assist other HIV+ people for better health
and wellness. PITCH wants to be a source
of encouragement, provide educational
opportunities, camaraderie, and a sense of
community to all Iowans living with HIV/
AIDS.
We hope you will consider sponsoring
someone to attend the Wellness Summit. All
contributions to PITCH are tax-deductible
to the full extent allowed by law. PITCH is
a 501©3 nonprofit, as defined by the IRS.
Thank you for your consideration.
Here is a testimonial from someone
who attended the 2010 Wellness Summit:
My name is Brian O’Gary and I was
diagnosed with HIV.
I debated whether I should be so direct
when introducing myself, but, experiencing
a weekend at the annual PITCH Wellness
Summit, I am more confident today in being
able to forthcomingly identify as a person
living with HIV.
In short, the Wellness Summit is an
extraordinary experience that I recommend
to any Iowan who wants to learn more about
the living with HIV/AIDS.
In the days preceding the retreat, I
found myself growing increasingly apprehensive; I more than once thought about
calling the summit organizers and informing
them I would not be able to attend. Let’s
face it - living with HIV/AIDS can be a trial.
Fighting the public stigma, struggling with
self-scrutiny, maneuvering the inevitable
financial pitfalls, and the accepting the truth
that one’s illness is, momentarily at its best,
chronic, often an insuperable burden to bear.
And it’s intimidating to take a step out of the
box and learn from perfect strangers who
live the same day-to-day struggles as me.
Fortunately, these fears were for naught
because the planning committee did an
astounding job organizing the weekend.
All people present were welcoming and
accepting because of their shared experi-
TTPITCH continued page 31
Our speakers on the first Friday of March
were the creators and purveyors of the excellent “Couscous Royale” pictured here—the
signature dish of Schera’s Restaurant & Bar
located in truly beautiful downtown Elkader,
Iowa (pop. 1,338). Algeria-born Frederique
Boudouani and his partner, Iowa-born Brian
Breuning, charmed and inspired us with
their story—a story that initially reminded
me of the old radio soap-opera (that aired
before either of them was born!) which asks
the question: “Can this gayboy poet from
a tiny farming community in the Midwest
find happiness as the spouse of another
gayboy, son of an international Algerian
diplomat, who’s never lived in a city of less
than two million?” The answer, as Brian
and Frederique clearly demonstrated, is a
resounding YES.
“Established December 2006 in historic
downtown Elkader,” reads their website,
Scheras.com. “We strive to provide a unique
dining experience along the banks of the
Turkey River. Drawing from Algerian, North
African, and Mediterranean cuisines, along
with a mix of Midwestern favorites, we offer a
healthy and exciting alternative to the sameold-same-old. Enjoy the beauty of Elkader
in this full-service restaurant and bar featuring many local favorites and North African
dishes. Full patio overlooking the river in
the summertime…”
But Schera’s has become far more than
just another exotic eatery in the county seat
of Clayton County in northeast Iowa. Fred-
Frederique Boudouani and Brian Breuning
erique and Brian were determined that their
establishment would be a place where locals
and other visitors can feel safe, maybe a little
less lonely. “I’m not saying Elkader should be
a gay resort,” Frederique said, “but gay people
can be integrated into society.”
And the couple’s contributions to
Elkader go well beyond a tasty meal and
interesting conversation. Brian joined the
Chamber of Commerce; Frederique became
active in the county’s historical society and
took charge of the town’s sister-city relationship with Mascara, Algeria. He lends
his hospitality and translation services to
visiting delegations from Algeria and other
Arab nations.
He also has plans for a computer business, Elkader Technologies, which will
include a business incubator to help the town
become a center for hi-tech employment.
Creating jobs and stimulating economic
development for Iowa, collaborating with
TTFFBC continued page 32
ACCESSline Page 30
APRIL 2011
Queeries LGBT Etiquette by Steven Petrow Wired That Way by Rachel Eliason
To spy or not to spy
on my girlfriend
Q: Last week I picked up my girlfriend’s cell and read a very intimate text
from someone who was no doubt a sexual
partner. I completely flipped out and
have been thinking about downloading
some of the “spy” software that allows
you “to find out everything THEY DO on
the Internet and computer.” Do you think
that’s a good idea?
A: No. I’d start by asking your girlfriend
about the text message you saw and see
both what she says and how she acts. But
let’s say, for arguments sake, you’re not
satisfied by her response or simply don’t
trust it.
Now, you’ve got a problem. But it’s not
one that would be solved by signing up for
one of those “I spy” services. Indeed, my
understanding is that this spyware can
alert you to keywords in her chats, instant
messages, emails and can let you see everything she posts on Facebook, every site she
visits or searches for,
and every photo she’s
posted.
You can also
retrieve passwords
and logins. Horrifying, I
say. Whether or not you
find more dirt, you’re
already proven yourself
distrustful—so what’s
the point? A relationship dispute is not akin
to a court inquisition.
Whether by talking more or seeing a
couple’s counselor, you need to get to the
root of the problem, which seems to be
sexual indiscretion and/or lack of trust.
Security benefits, but that your mother is
when your stepfather passes.
Sadly, you have about 1,100 federal
benefits that are denied to gays and lesbians
to choose from as your examples. A lot of
straight folks have never thought of these
inequities, but once pointed out, the inherent unfairness is often quite persuasive.
If this doesn’t change your mom’s mind,
then either agree to disagree or ask her to
put a lid on it (but nicely because it’s your
mother).
This mother-in-law
is a Bridezilla!
Q: My boyfriend and I will be holding
a civil partnership ceremony at the end
of this year and have decided it will be
a simple affair. Neither of us wants a
big “traditional” wedding and we are
limited to a strict budget in any case.
We have gotten the ball rolling and have
started organizing everything that needs
doing—registry office, hotel, suits, a
photographer, etc.
My main problem
is my future motherin-law—up to now
I’ve always had a great
relationship with her.
Now she’s suddenly
become a Bridezilla.
She insists on being
kept up to date on
every little detail and wants regular
briefings on our progress. She finds fault
in everything we do too. (The hotel isn’t
nice enough and the menu sounds awful
for starters.)
She keeps asking us to give her jobs
to do. I have tried appeasing her by
giving her small tasks, but I’m running
out of jobs to invent. I have spoken to my
boyfriend about her but he doesn’t see
it as a big deal. He thinks we should just
ignore her. But, I can’t!
A: If this weren’t so difficult for you, I’d
have a big laugh about it, because Bridezilla
mothers-in-law are such a classic by now—
straight brides (and grooms) have had to
tolerate them since the beginning of time.
Gay couples tend to encounter less of the
kind of interference you’re describing if
only because we usually cover the costs of
our own nuptials (when our parents aren’t
paying, they don’t get as much of vote) and
we often partner later in life (when our
folks have gotten used to us making our
own decisions).
But I now see that a mother-in-law is
a mother-in-law is a mother-in-law! Hello
equality!
You’ve done everything that you can do;
the idea of small tasks is brilliant. It’s now
up to your boyfriend to take on his mother
and set some limits—even if he doesn’t see
her meddling as a big deal. He needs to do it
for you—both for in terms of your wedding
but also to establish the right boundaries
with your MIL for the years to come. You
can tell him I said so!
Steven Petrow is the author of the
forthcoming book, Steven Petrow’s
Complete Gay & Lesbian Manners,
gaymanners.com. To ask him your personal
question: [email protected]
I now see that a
mother-in-law is a
mother-in-law is a
mother-in-law!
Hello equality!
My mother opposes
gay marriage, but
loves my husband
Q: My husband and I have been
together for over 20 years and were
married last October. My mother has said
she’s very happy and loves my husband.
This week at dinner my mother said she
was thrilled that “gay marriage was not
legal everywhere.”
Here’s the problem: My mother,
and especially my stepfather, are rabid
Republicans. I know they will continue
to follow the Republicans again on this
issue. Do I make a big deal about it? Do
I point out that they want to deny my
husband and me a fundamental right?
A: Now, you understand that age-old
adage cautioning people not to discuss
politics (or religion) at dinner; it can give
you indigestion (or worse)! Since you say
your mother loves your husband, I think
there’s a strong disconnect for her between
the personal and the political.
What I suggest doing is sitting down
with your mother (leave your stepdad out
of this) the next time you’re together and
explain how same-sex couples are discriminated against because we can’t marry. Use
concrete examples and make comparisons
to their marriage.
For instance, if your partner dies,
explain that you’re not eligible for his Social
Internet filters: not just for conservatives anymore
In the old days the idea of filtering
and blocking websites was something that
conservatives talked a lot about. Conservatives lawmakers make the occasional,
usually ineffective, stab at passing some
sort of law that would block unacceptable
websites, but the whole freedom of speech
thing gets in the way (pesky civil rights).
In the early days of the web, they leaned
on corporations to do their dirty work.
After several rather public debacles, that
too flopped. (How many of you remember
the infamous incident where the budding
AOL accidentally removed all of its breast
cancer support groups, because the word
breast triggered its filters?)
For many years now Internet filters
have been something that concerned
parents used to keep their kids from seeing
inappropriate sites on the Internet. Even a
quick review of the ‘top’ internet filters will
quickly reveal this. They all have names like
Netnanny, Cybersitter, or Safe Eyes.
Now even Atheists can get in on
the action, with Godblock, an Internet
filter that eliminates ‘religious content’
from your computer. Thank ----- now
those atheist parents can rest soundly
knowing their kids aren’t been tempted
into churches by their home computers.
Their website, godblock.com explains that
their software “is targeted at parents and
schools who wish to protect their kids from
the often violent, sexual, and psychologically harmful material in many holy texts,
and from being indoctrinated into any
religion before they are of the age to make
such decisions.”
If keeping atheist children from
finding out about god strikes you as a little
bit kooky, hold on to your hat, it gets far
kookier than that. Firefox offers an add-on
called “shaved Bieber.” It systematically
removes all references to Justin Bieber
from its web browser. Yet another web
browser add-on offers to block any reference to your ex.
Whether you are trying to prevent
your kids from being inducted into organized religion, saving yourself from being
inundated by information about teen idol
Justin Bieber or having to face the pain
and embarrassment of seeing your ex’s
Facebook page (where is says she has
moved on and is dating someone else)
be forewarned. Even a quick search of
Internet filters will find as many hits for
getting around content blockers as for the
programs themselves. Kids are notorious
for being able to get around restrictions on
their web browsing, and I am sure Justin
is out there right now, looking for ways
around the Shaved Bieber.
Positive LGBT sites
• Day of Silence:
dayofsilence.org
• It Gets Better Project:
itgetsbetter.org
• The Trevor Project:
thetrevorproject.org
• GSA netuwork:
gsanetwork.org
• Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education
Network: glsen.org
Negative LGBT sites
• National Association for Research &
Therapy of Homosexuality: narth.com
• People can Change:
peoplecanchange.com
• Parents and Friends of Ex-gays:
pfox.org
APRIL 2011
ACCESSline Page 31
Inside Out: Taking Risks by Ellen Krug
The other night, I embarked on what I
euphemistically called “the Ellen Krug Social
Plan.” I had been spending way too many
evenings at home alone for my liking, so I
figured I would not let my lack of a dating
partner keep me from enjoying life. Going
solo is something that I need to become used
to, I’ve decided.
Thus, I found myself at a local jazz club
for the launching of an alternative arts and
literature magazine. I stood in a corner
while poets and authors read out loud, good
performances. A couple of women stood
near me and we struck up a nice conversation. Both women were my age and straight,
and like me, they were not letting being
single keep them down.
I even learned that one of the women
had once employed my favorite new writer
while operating a bed and breakfast in
LaCrosse, Wisconsin. “Small world,” I
thought and I gained some insight into the
personality of the author, something very
valuable for me, an aspiring writer.
It was time to head to another venue,
but before exiting the jazz club, I used
the rest room. While washing my hands, I
commented to another women at the sink
about how nice the event had been. From
behind one of the stalls, a woman yelled,
“whose the dude in here?” My wonderful
male-born voice had exposed me yet again.
When the woman emerged to see a longhaired woman dressed in a skirt, boots, and
jewelry, she was entirely apologetic. “I’m so
sorry, I only heard your voice and guessed
you were a guy,” she said as we stood outside
the rest room and talked for a good twenty
minutes.
We did not get into anything about
being me transgendered and I have no
idea whether she even understood that I
had once been male.
Instead, we were two
women talking about
the arts and Minnesota
Public Radio, and how
men in power treat
women so poorly.
Ironically, at that
point in the evening, I
didn’t understand how
the latter topic, the one
about badly behaving
men, would be so on
point.
Two hours later I
was at a second venue
for the night, another
step in my social rehab
plan. It was a bar named
Lee’s Liquor Lounge
and I was there to hear a group called the
Belfast Cowboys, a Van Morrison cover band.
The bar was filled with a blue collar crowd
of straight men and women. I probably
was too overdressed, but I went forward
nonetheless.
Eventually, a man asked me to dance
and off we went, bodies moving to “Brown
Eyed Girl.” As the song ended and we
proceeded from the dance floor, a man who
had earlier overheard me speak came up to
us. Glaring at me, he asked, “Are you a guy?”
I didn’t quite hear him and he repeated, “Are
you a guy?”
I couldn’t believe my ears. I yelled
back “No, I’m a woman.” His look told me
that unlike my new
woman friend from
earlier in the evening,
this guy was going to be
anything but apologetic.
My dance partner was
of no help. I ran out of
the bar, wondering why
in the world I had ever
ventured into the night
in the first place.
There are three
lessons here.
The first one is
easy: that as a single
woman, it’s safer to
sit home alone where
there are no risks of
unpleasant situations,
where hot chocolate
with whip cream is at the ready. But sitting
at home limits us, and unless we take risks,
we won’t be rewarded by serendipity. Next
time, I’ll dress right for the occasion and
I’ll redouble my speech therapy lessons to
help with my abysmal voice. The optimist in
me advises that sooner or later, things just
have to pay off.
The second lesson is that men and
women act differently. I know this may not
be a news flash to you women. Most of the
time, women are quick to apologize for their
mistakes, especially where it may hurt the
feelings of another person. We are nurturers
and community builders. This is why being
a woman works so well for me.
Men, on the other hand, are more
aggressive by nature. Now that I’ve flipped
genders, I understand that much of that
aggression is testosterone driven. If not
hormones (and a fair amount of beer), what
else explains a man coming forward in a
crowded bar to ask a complete stranger who
obviously appears feminine if she instead is
male? A woman would never do that. This
kind of aggression (and stupidity) is why
… it’s safer to sit
home alone where
there are no risks of
unpleasant situations,
where hot chocolate
with whip cream is at
the ready. But sitting
at home limits us, and
unless we take risks,
we won’t be rewarded
by serendipity.
PITCH
ence. During the weekend, I was able to
attend a number of seminars, ranging from
building self-esteem and identity-creation
to managing medicinal side-effects and
engaging in safe sexual practices. I learned
about taking care of myself and becoming
a self-advocate.
As a Wellness Summit, I expected to
learn more about living with HIV, but I did not
expect to have as much fun as I did. Between
morning games and campfires at night, there
was ample time to get to make new friends
and catch up with old ones. We had plenty
of downtime to socialize and everyone was
open and willing to get to know one another.
Aside from the seminars and the games, it
was the opportunity to hear from people
like myself which made the weekend most
memorable.
Most of us do not have the regular privilege of talking to those who walk our same
path; as a community, people living with
Ellen Krug is a writer, lawyer, human.
She was a trial attorney for 28 years before
realizing there is more to life. She is now on
sabbatical to write a book, and if that does
not work out, to wait tables. She is parent
to two adult children and hoping for the
best, despite the odds. She can be reached
at [email protected].
men so easily take us to war.
The last lesson here is really more of
a reflective observation, one with which
all transgenders can identify. I’ve done the
good fight to become Ellen: I’ve lost people
close to me because they cannot accept this
is how I need to be; I’ve had multiple surgeries; hours of electrolysis; and girlfriend
advice on clothes and make-up. I’ve even
taken lessons on how women word their
sentences, as if it’s some kind of special
code.
Yet, after all of this, I still don’t fit in.
Will I ever get my peace and just be another
woman making her way in the world? I can’t
imagine enduring men coming up to me
and asking if I’m really a chick for the rest
of my life. At some point, I’ve got to believe
I’d want to throw in the towel.
Certainly, I’m not looking for sympathy.
I’ve got it way better than 99% of other
transgenders. Yet, if I’m encountering these
issues, I can only imagine how depressing it
is for other Ts who are not as lucky as me.
Maybe that’s why Ts have one of the highest
suicide rates.
But knowing me, I’ll hang in there. I’ll
just adjust the social rehab plan to take into
account bad-mannered men.
HIV have the additional struggle of being
able to commiserate with others who share
a similar experience. Through hearing the
stories of others, I recognized that people
living with HIV are intermingled with the
general populace: we are your neighbor,
your coworker, your mother, your partner.
The Wellness Summit afforded me realization that I am not alone; Iowan people from
all walks of life are affected by a shared
condition. In many ways, the retreat was
validation of a life I have no choice but to
live. I am grateful for the experience and I
sincerely look forward to going again next
year.
Gratefully,
Brian O’Gary
Please join PITCH on facebook or visit
our website at www.pitchiowa.org. PITCH’s
post office box is: P.O. Box 518, Des Moines,
IA 50302. Thank you for your continued
support.
ACCESSline Page 32
FFBC
Iowa universities and colleges, is only one
side of the equation. In the building that will
eventually house the incubator, Boudouani
hopes to open the Algerian-American Center
for Global Peace and Understanding.
The story of Brian and Frederique’s
move from Boston to Elkader actually begins
on September 11, 2001. As described by
Erica Stewart in the National Trust for
Historic Preservation just last January:
…the terror attacks left Boudouani
with many unsettling questions which,
for him as a Muslim-American, were
amplified a thousand-fold… This led
him to research the history of Islam in
the US. He was astonished to discover
that the first mosque built in the US
was in Cedar Rapids, and that Elkader
was actually named after Abd al-Qadir,
the “George Washington of Algeria”—
the only town in the US to hold such a
distinction. Three Americans … founded
the town in 1846 to honor the Algerian
general and poet who—like the English
poet Lord Byron in Greece—fought in
resistance to colonial occupation in the
mid-1800s.
Discovering Elkader’s history gave
shape to Boudouani’s desire to improve
understanding and communication
between the two cultures. He and
Breuning traveled to Elkader several
times from Boston and fell in love with
the place—and decided to relocate. …
As Frederique’s doctoral degree from
MIT in computer engineering and
Brian’s master’s from Boston University
in creative writing did not seem to be
of much use, the idea for Schera’s was
born. Named for Boudouani’s sister
Scheherazade (and for the story-teller in
One Thousand and One Nights) Schera’s
serves a mix of Algerian, North African,
and Mediterranean cuisines—along
with American favorites. “I’d never ever
heard of a pork tenderloin,” Frederique
told us. So from its first day, Schera’s
gave Iowa a place to enjoy delicious food,
both American and North African, and it
has continued to evolve into a gathering
spot where people can learn about the
Arab and Muslim world in a friendly,
welcoming environment.
For Boudouani, the rewards are
simple, and many. ‘In all honesty, it
warms my heart to see someone who is
raised in Elkader and has been a farmer
his whole life, come in, order couscous,
love it, and come back again and again.’
And Iowans have proved their loyalty
to Schera’s in more ways than returning to the restaurant to eat. When the
floods of 2008 hit, Schera’s suffered
about $250,000 in damage and was
closed for several months. But the flood
brought out the best in Brian and Frederique’s fellow Iowans: they received
help with the clean-up from neighbors
and strangers alike – some traveling all
the way from Des Moines. Others wrote
checks to help the owners re-open the
restaurant. ‘The outpouring of support
was just amazing,’ Frederique said. ‘I
still get choked up about it.’
CREEPS
be constitutional it just needed to be passed
“overwhelmingly.” I think that over the years
the constitutionality of various laws has
been decided on other criteria that’s, you
know, actually based on the Constitution.
But those were probably activist judges.
Also, Boehner claims that Obama “won’t
lead,” but isn’t that exactly what the president is doing here? Doesn’t being a leader
sometimes entail making choices that run
the risk of being unpopular because of one’s
own conviction? My guess is that’s something pretty foreign to Boehner.
“It strikes me as something that’s just as
raw politics as anything I’ve seen,” Boehner
said. “Knowing that a lot of people who
believe in DOMA are probably not likely to
vote for him and, uh, pandering to the other
side on this issue.”
Yeah, that’s got to be it. When in doubt,
throw the gays a crumb so they keep votin’
for ya.
APRIL 2011
Because Congress can choose to step in
and defend DOMA without Obama, Boehner
assures CBN viewers, “There are a lot of
options on the table.”
One of those options is that the House
of Reps get their own attorney and defend
DOMA in court themselves, an option that
Rick “I have a frothy Google problem” Santorum favors.
That’s something Boehner has already
considered. “I’d be very surprised if the
House didn’t decide that they were going
to defend the law,” he said.
As would anyone. I mean, how could
we possibly expect a Republican-controlled
House not to take this super juicy anti-gay
bait? I mean, economy-schmonomy. Who
cares about people out of work if the specter
of two ladies getting hitched looms over
our heads.
And who knows? Maybe DOMA is the
only thing keeping our economy together.
Perhaps Marriage Defending is a much
larger sector of the economy than anyone
realizes.
“Dr. Laura could use some coaching in learning the difference between
the Bible and the Bill of Rights and the Constitution, those documents
which are supposed to guarantee rights and protections and privileges
for all of us but apparently not for gays and lesbians… We can tax the
paychecks. The government is very happy to take money from gays and
lesbians, but apparently it is not quite capable of providing freedoms and
basic privileges like the right to marry and the right to have a family.”
—Talk show host Leeza Gibbonsat GLAAD’s 11th Annual Media Awards,
April 15, 2000.
Someone you
know needs
health care
without judgment.
A Planned Parenthood of the Heartland health center
200 Army Post Rd., Ste. 26
Des Moines, Iowa
515.953.7560
Welcoming most insurances and Medicaid
www.familypracticedsm.org
APRIL 2011
ACCESSline Page 33
Twenty Questions interview by Amber Dunham
In 2010, high school student Amber Dunham participated in a class assignment to ask someone 20 questions for an LGBT essay. The person Amber chose to ask was Alexis,
a transgendered woman from the Iowa City area. Amber’s questions covered Alexis’s definition of transgender, details of Alexis’s life and emotions prior to accepting her desire
to be a girl, reactions from family and friends, psychological and medical requirements prior to sexual reassignment surgery, details of sexual reassignment surgery, federal
and state document changes after Alexis’s surgery, advice Alexis would give to others, effects of Alexis’s change, and her religious views. Any questions or comments for Alexis
can be sent care of this publication to [email protected].
The major problem or challenge that I along, my desire to transition grew stronger,
offered any positive comments or support.
In fact, my mother originally told me I could faced in accepting my alternate persona, or and I went to the University of Minnesota
not come to see her dressed as a female. I in transitioning, was simply the fact that I to be evaluated by a psychiatrist in their
2) How did your family and
was prepared for this. My mother eventu- wanted others to like me, although I realize gender clinic (at my wife‘s suggestion), and
friends react?
It is common knowledge within the ally relented and tolerated the change, as I made it difficult for them to do that. I simply left Minneapolis quite frustrated as I was
didn’t want others diagnosed either as a severe transvestite or
Trans community that the decision to finally did some of the other
transition is not without many challenges and family members, and
I was let go from my job to hate me, or think I a mild transsexual… but there was nothing
strange. So I kept definitive that I could grasp onto. As the years
difficulties. From my readings on the internet, we would eventually
of over 18 years “because was
to myself for so many continued, we gradually grew apart and evenI was aware that beginning this new lifestyle even go out in public
could lead to the loss of family, friends and together after that. My I made mistakes.” Not one years, as I tried to make tually parted on mutual terms. She had come
employment. I also was aware of the poten- sister and I also go out person in my family, however, everyone else like me. to realize that I was not the “man” she thought
on the other hand, in she had married. I had finally concluded that
tial for physical harm, which can come from for brunch or lunch
initially offered any positive But
doing this, I made myself the idea I harbored in my mind was not going
some individuals who hold certain beliefs. For from time to time, and
these reasons, many people who transition she has resolved many comments or support. In fact, and my life miserable in to go away, and that I should let her go and
simply quit their job and leave their friends, of the initial conflicts my mother originally told me the process. It wasn’t start the next chapter of my life. She wanted
I began to open up to start a family and I had no desire to be a
choosing instead to move to a new city in their I’m sure she had. And
I could not come to see her until
to others that I was able father by that time. We really had no sex life
attempt to start a new life as a member of the in time certain family
to be convinced that I during the years we were married, as I never
opposite gender. I did it the hard way. Maybe I members eventually dressed as a female.
should put myself, and had a desire to act as a male in a traditional
was lazy, I don’t know. I simply decided that I accepted my transition
was going to do this transitioning right where but the subject is never discussed. I am still my own happiness first, and let everyone male/female relationship. The little sex life
generally not invited to any family functions, else make their own decision. This was very we had consisted primarily not of intercourse,
I was and just hope it went well.
Overall, I had many reactions that were outside of those from my sister; and that may hard for me to do, as I simply did not think but her bringing me to a climax—which she
not very positive. Well, let me clarify that a well be due to the separation that I kept from that way. But at that point in my life, I also did for some reason… I don’t know, maybe
little. When you have grown up and have them for so many years. But maybe not. I am knew I needed to change something. I was she felt it settled me down in one way or
lived among people, be they friends, family, not sure I will ever truly find that out, and I can aware I could not go on much longer living another. I know—it was selfish on my part,
or co-workers, they become comfortable live with that. I was somewhat encouraged the way I felt. It was my “living hell.” And, to but the stress was building within my mind,
with the image that they see of you. When I when one of my second cousins, and much be honest, I am really surprised I was able and the relief was SO beneficial. Basically,
finally found the courage to transition from later two of my first cousins, requested to to keep living as long as I did. The timing of we should never have gotten married, but
be friends on Facebook, certain of these people entering my life was we were great roommates… I deeply regret
living as a male to living
I did it the hard way. but we rarely if ever so critical… I have no idea how I found them, anything I did that might have hurt her, for
as a female, I wrote a
two page letter based Maybe I was lazy, I don’t know. communicate. One first or they found me, but I will be forever grateful she was a really great person… and I know
simply contacted for their wisdom, insight and support.
that hindsight now makes me regret ever
on a similar letter I
I simply decided that I was cousin
me by email. I was totally
having gone through with the marriage. I
found on the internet
should have known better, but, remember,
that someone else had going to do this transitioning caught by surprise with 3) I was told that you were married
used, and had given right where I was and just hope the two who came from once before, when you were a man. How I was still grasping for anything that would
my father’s side of the did this decision, of being a transgender, make me feel “normal.”
permission for others it went well.
family, as I haven’t seen affect your relationship or did it? Please
While my attempt to get married and
to adapt for their own
hope for a normal life may not have been the
use. I tailored the letter to fit my situation. them in a very long time, and they really had explain?
It explained what I was going to do, why I to do a little research to even find me.
Interesting question… I did tell my wife best decision I have ever made, unfortunately
When it comes to friends, I also lost before we were married that I liked to dress it is a very common occurrence with those
was going to do it, and when I was going to
do it. I mailed out, or handed out, about 250 many who I felt were friends, but realized as a female, yet I am not sure I made it clear individuals who struggle with their gender
of those letters. It was actually a very well later that they actually weren’t when they how deep my desire was to transition. I’m and sexual identity. This is true in all areas of
the gay, lesbian, bisexual
written letter and I received many comments fled. It really wasn’t different from the way not even completely
on it, however, in some circles it did not go family reacted, and for the same reason. I sure I knew, at that
I have to chuckle when or Trans (GLBT) commustill have some friends from the past whom time, where this road
Do we enter into
over well.
I hear anyone say that nities.
these relationships out
I would say that my true “friends” accept- I see at coffee on the weekends. And though was going to end. I was
ed the change and stood by me. Many people there are many who are no longer comfort- still trying to figure out “someone decided to become of any malice?
No, that isn’t the
whom I had thought were friends began to able around me anymore (like they think I how I could somehow gay, or lesbian, or anything
case. Those of us who
distance themselves, so they likely were not have a contagious disease), I have also had become “normal,” and
similar to that.” I’m sorry, but deal with these inner
true friends anyway. I was let go from my job the chance to meet so many new people who be like any other guy.
of over 18 years “because I made mistakes.” can willingly accept me as who I am now… Perhaps, like me, she that is rarely the case, and conflicts at various
Not one person in my family, however, initially and this applies to people of all ages.
thought that this would though we are who we are, times in our lives are
simply struggling to be
go away in time. She at
first went along with the most of us had some difficult accepted, to fit into the
dressing, and we would periods in our lives as we mainstream of life and
occasionally go out at came to our self realization, not feel stigmatized as
someone who is differnight to a large discount
store or to a McDonald’s and those times were often ent. Some of us are able
to have stable relationor something like that. I difficult to deal with.
ships lasting many
dressed freely at home,
at least when there were no foster girls years, but for others, eventually the reality
around, and it was fortunate as we actually of who we are becomes an acceptable reality,
could wear the same sized skirts and sweat- and we decide to follow a different path. I
ers… She even made me a few skirts. She have to chuckle when I hear anyone say that
was a fantastic seamstress, and I used to “someone decided to become gay, or lesbian,
lay out and cut out her patterns for her. She or anything similar to that.” I’m sorry, but that
even tried to teach me to sew, and I could do is rarely the case, and though we are who we
fairly well on an A-line skirt—until I got to the are, most of us had some difficult periods in
zipper… after a few tries to get it in right, she our lives as we came to our self realization,
finally told me she would finish it before the and those times were often difficult to deal
skirt was ruined—I quit trying to sew after with. For me, though I can now look back on
that, but continued to cut the patterns for my struggles and reflect on them, I would not
her. However, as our years together moved wish something like that on anyone.
(Continued from March Issue)
ACCESSline Page 34
WORLD NEWS
enforced,” the parliament said.
Ongoing problems include forced
closures of LGBT organizations, the army’s
classification of homosexuality as a psychosexual illness, murders of transgender
people, and the withdrawal of sexual orientation from a draft anti-discrimination law, the
parliament said.
While Montenegro does ban anti-LGBT
discrimination in employment and public
services, the Euro Parliament said that
discrimination persists “including on the
part of state authorities.”
The co-president of the parliament’s
LGBT Intergroup, Ulrike Lunacek, said: “We
demand that Ferhat Dinosa, minister for
human minority rights, defend LGBT people’s
human rights instead of displaying intolerance and insensitivity to these issues. This
is the only way forward for Montenegro’s
accession process.”
Lithuanian MPs want to
ban gender-reassignment
surgery
Conservative members of Lithuania’s
Parliament have proposed banning genderreassignment surgery via the Civil Code.
They said the move would protect the
nation “from any preconditions which create
grounds for the appearance of claims against
Lithuania at the European Court of Human
Rights.”
Lithuania lost an ECHR case in 2007
concerning a transsexual’s right to genderreassignment surgery. The court said the
nation violated the individual’s right to
respect of private life and ordered payment
of damages in the amount of 40,000 euros,
which Lithuania paid.
The Civil Code currently allows for
gender-reassignment surgery but the nation
lacks necessary laws setting forth the conditions and procedures for surgery.
The Lithuanian Gay League denounced
the parliamentary proposal.
Euro Parliament blasts
Iran on gays
The European Parliament on March 10
adopted a resolution urging Iran to “stop
discriminating against people on the basis
of their sexual orientation” and denouncing “the inhumane and medieval practice
of sentencing people to death for alleged
offences pertaining to choice of partners or
sexual practices.”
The parliament also welcomed “steps
taken by several Member States to provide
shelter to those Iranian human rights defenders, dissidents, journalists, students, women,
children and artists who are persecuted
for their religious beliefs, opinions, sexual
orientation, or other aspects of the exercise
of their human rights.”
Iran has the death penalty for consensual homosexual sex. While no such executions have been documented in recent years,
it is widely believed they may have occurred.
Executions are known to have taken place in
recent years following convictions in cases of
alleged nonconsensual sex between males.
British gay magazine
launches Thai edition
The well-known British gay magazine
Attitude launched a Thai-language edition
in Thailand on March 9. According to local
correspondent Douglas Sanders, it was full of
fancy ads, including from Jean Paul Gaultier,
Diesel, Puma, Giorgio Armani, Davidoff and
Playboy eyewear.
Mozambique LGBT group
still unregistered
Mozambique’s only LGBT group,
Lambda, said March 1 that it has been waiting
three years for the government to complete
its official registration.
The group, also known as the Mozambican Association for the Defense of Sexual
Minorities, submitted its documents to the
registry office in January 2008.
The registrar responded that the group’s
existence “offends current morality,” and
forwarded the forms to the Justice Ministry
for review.
In early 2009, Justice Minister Benvinda
Levi suggested a rewrite of one article of the
group’s statutes, which the group agreed
to.
In early 2010, Lambda met with the
deputy justice minister. He said there was
no legal impediment to registration and
suggested the group submit a recounting of
facts and law to the ministry, which it did.
APRIL 2011
Nothing has happened since then, which
Lambda says amounts to a violation of its
constitutional right to freedom of association.
Open gays elected to
Irish Dáil
Two gay men made history by being
elected to Ireland’s lower house of Parliament, Dáil Éireann, on Feb. 25.
Dominic Hannigan will represent
Meath East, a parliamentary constituency
in the northeast of the nation, for the Labour
Party.
And John Lyons will represent the
constituency of Dublin North West for
Labour.
Hannigan currently is a member of the
Seanad Éireann, or Senate. Members of that
body are not directly elected, and its powers
are weaker than those of the Dáil.
Hannigan will have to give up that seat,
to which he was appointed in 2007 by fellow
politicians.
Ireland’s only other openly gay member
of Parliament—current or past—also is
a senator. Since 1987, David Norris has
represented voters who are graduates of the
University of Dublin.
Honduras special unit
to investigate anti-LGBT
hate crimes
Honduras is creating an investigative
unit and task force to tackle hate crimes
APRIL 2011
against LGBTI people, women, youth and
journalists.
The government ministers of human
rights and public security will be directly
involved in the undertaking, which will
utilize 150 researchers.
Officials estimate that Honduras has
seen 200 anti-LGBTI killings in the past
five years.
In January, the U.S. Embassy in Tegucigalpa urged the Honduran government
to “vigorously investigate” five murders
of LGBT people that took place since Dec.
18.
The embassy expressed “great concern”
about the killings and said “the protection
of Honduran law extends to all citizens
regardless of sexual orientation.”
The government must “take all necessary steps to protect LGBT persons, who are
among the most vulnerable to violence and
abuse in Honduras,” the U.S. officials said.
Belarus LGBTs hope to
march in May
Gay activists in Minsk, Belarus, applied
to the city government March 4 for permission to hold a “March of Equality” on May 17,
the International Day Against Homophobia
and Transphobia.
Last year, the city’s Executive Committee banned a gay pride march and, when
activists ignored the ban, several of them
were aggressively arrested for taking part
in an unsanctioned public action.
Moscow Pride founder Nikolai Alekseev, who joined that march, said police
were “brutal and violent.”
This year, the organizers’ application
expanded the scope of the proposed march
to include several other minority groups
in hopes of improving the odds of getting
city approval and reducing hostility from
anti-gay protesters.
The march, if approved, will wrap up
four days of “Festival of Equality” events that
include a film screening, a photo exhibition
and other activities.
Report: Int’l AIDS
Conference shortchanges
at-risk populations
A new report charges that the biennial
International AIDS Conference, the premier
gathering for people working in the HIV
field, shortchanges groups most likely to
become infected with HIV, including gay
men, transgender people, sex workers and
drug users.
An “audit” of conference programming,
conducted by the Global Forum on MSM &
HIV, analyzed last year’s gathering in Vienna
and found that the percentage of sessions
exclusively focused on such groups was 2.6
percent for men who have sex with men
(MSM), 1.1 percent for transgender people,
3 percent for sex workers and 4.5 percent
for drug users.
“While the International AIDS Society
turns a blind eye, HIV rates among these
populations continue to climb around the
world,” said the forum’s executive officer,
Dr. George Ayala. “The IAC is the world’s
most important opportunity for interna-
tional exchange and collaboration on HIV
and AIDS. Such abysmal representation of
most-at-risk groups only serves to reinforce
the invisibility, discrimination and disregard that drive the epidemic among these
communities.”
The report recommends that conference organizers ensure a transparent
process for reviewing abstracts and designing programming, increase their support of
authors developing abstracts focused on key
populations, and broaden representation
on the committees that develop conference
programming.
“It is incumbent upon the organizers
to ensure that the IAC becomes a vehicle
for change, shifting the global landscape
so that funding, research and programs are
directed to those who need them most. Right
now it’s part of the problem,” Ayala said.
LGBT group forms
in Montenegro
An LGBT organization has formed and
been officially registered in Podgorica,
capital of the former Yugoslav republic
of Montenegro. The group, LGBT Forum
Progress, is pressing for a law granting gay
couples the rights of marriage.
Cuban TV airs Glee
Cuba’s Cubavisión channel is airing
the übergay U.S. television series Glee, each
Saturday at 5:45 p.m. State TV also recently
aired Six Feet Under.
Assistance: Bill Kelley
ACCESSline Page 35
“I started my activism
in the eighties when a new
disease emerged that was
quickly and inexplicably
killing people. Worse than
the virus there was the
terrible discrimination
and prejudice it left in its
wake. Suddenly it made
gay people stop being
human beings and start
becoming the enemy. I
knew somebody had to do
something. For God’s sake,
our president didn’t even
utter the word for years
into the epidemic. So I got
involved.”
—Actress and activist,
Elizabeth Taylor, at
GLAAD’s 11th Annual
Media Awards, April 15,
2000. Rest in peace.
ACCESSline Page 36
DIRECTORY NOTICE
The ACCESSline community directory is updated each issue. LISTINGS
ARE FREE but are limited by space.
Free online listings are available at
www.ACCESSlineIOWA.com.
Information about new listings must contain a phone number for publication and a
contact (e-mail address, land address, or
website) for our records. For more information or to provide corrections, please
contact [email protected] or
call (319) 550-0957.
NATIONAL ORGANIZATIONS
Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund
1133 15th Street NW, Suite 350,
Washington, DC 20005
www.victoryfund.org.
202-VICTORY [842-8679]
Human Rights Campaign
National political organization,
lobbies congress for lesbian & gay issues,
political training state and local
www.hrc.org
1-800-777-HRCF[4723]
Lambda Legal Defense & Education Fund
I I E. Adams, Suite 1008, Chicago, IL 60603
www.lambdalegal.org
312-663-4413 Fax: 312-663-4307
MortgageLoan.com
Housing & Mortgages for Gay & Lesbian
Couples, http://www.mortgageloan.com/lgbt/
National Gay & Lesbian Task Force (NGLTF)
1325 Massachusetts Ave NW,
Ste 600, Washington, DC, 20005
www.ngltf.org / taskforce.org
National Organization for Women (NOW)
733 15th ST NW, 2nd Floor
www.now.org 202-628-8669
PFLAG National Offices
1133 15th Street NW, Suite 350,
[email protected] - www.pflag.org
202-467-8180
The Trevor Lifeline
The Trevor Project operates the only nationwide, around-the-clock crisis and suicide
prevention lifeline for lesbian, gay, bisexual,
transgender and questioning youth. Each
year, our lifeline fields more than 30,000 calls
from LGBTQ youth as well as their families,
friends and educators.
(866) 4-U-TREVOR - (866) 488-7386
Open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year
All calls are toll-free and confidential
STATE ORGANIZATIONS
Equality Iowa
P.O. Box 18, Indianola, IA 50125
www.equalityiowa.org
515-537-3126
Faithful Voices
Interfaith Alliance of Iowa’s marriage equality
project. www.faithfulvoices.org
Imperial Court of Iowa
Non-profit fundraising & social,
statewide organization with members from
across the State of Iowa.
PO Box 1491, Des Moines, IA 50306-1491
www.imperialcourtofiowa.org
Iowa Chapter of the National
Organization for Women (NOW)
Janis Bowden, President, IA NOW
[email protected]
PO Box 41114, Des Moines, IA 503111
Iowa Gay Rodeo Association (IAGRA)
921 Diagonal Rd, Malcom, IA 50157
[email protected] 641-990-1411
Iowa PFLAG (Parents, Families & Friends of
Lesbians and Gay) State Council
PO Box 18, Indianola, IA 50125
http://community.pflag.org/Page.
aspx?pid=194&srcid=-2
515-537-3126 or 641-583-2024
Iowa Pride Network
777 Third Street, Suite 312,
Des Moines, Iowa 50309
Pridenetwork.org
Executive Director: 515-471-8062
Outreach Coordinator: 515-471-8063
LGBT Youth in Iowa Schools Task Force
PO Box 1997, Des Moines, 50306
515-243-1221
Ames
First United Methodist Church
516 Kellogg Ave, Ames, IA 50010
Contemporary worship Sat. 5:30;
Sun at 8:30 and 11:00am.
www.acswebnetworks.com/firstunitedmcames/
515-232-2750
Living with HIV Program
126 S. Kellogg, Suite 1
Ask for Janelle (Coordinator)
515-956-3312 ext 106 or
I -800-890-8230
ISU LGBTA Alliance
GLBT Support, Activism,
Social Events, Newsletter
L East Student Office Space
2229 Lincoln Way, Ames, IA 50014-7163
[email protected]
http://www.alliance.stuorg.iastate.edu
515-344-4478
Lord of Life Lutheran
2126 Gable Lane, Ames 50014
Services Sundays at 9:00a.m.; Wed. 7:00pm.
515-233-2350
PFLAG Ames
Youth and Shelter Services Offices
2328 Bristol Drive, Ames, IA 5001
2nd Tuesday, 7pm
www.pflagames.org
515-291-3607
Romantics Pleasure Palace
117 Kellogg Street, Ames, IA 50010-3315
http://www.romantixonline.com
515-232-7717
United Church of Christ-Congregational
6th & Kellogg, Ames, 50010
Sunday Continental Breakfast, 9:00am;
Sunday School, 9:30am; Worship 10:45am.
[email protected].
515-232-9323
Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Ames
1015 Hyland Ave.
Services: 9:30 am and 11:30 am, Sunday
www.uufames.org
Unity Church of Ames
226 9th St.
Sunday service and Sunday school 10:30am.
Wednesday mediation 6:30pm, .
www.websyt/unity/ames Daily dial-a-blessing
515-233-1613
Arnolds Park, Okoboji,
Spencer, Spirit Lake
The Royal Wedding Chapel
504 Church Street, Royal, IA 51357
712-933-2223
www.TheRoyalWeddingChapel.com
Wilson Resource Center
An Iowa Great Lakes area gay-owned
nonprofit community based organization.
PO Box 486, 597 W. Okoboji Rd.,
Arnolds Park IA 51331-0486
[email protected].
www.wilsonresource.org
712-332-5043
BURLINGTON
Arrowhead Motel
2520 Mount Pleasant St
Burlington, IA 52601-2118
319-752-6353 www.arrowheadia.com
HIV/AIDS Screening @ Des Moines County
Health Department in Burlington
522 N 3rd
By appointment between 8:00am to 4:30
319-753-8217 Confidential
RISQUES IV (adult store)
421 Dry Creek Ave, West Burlington, IA 52601
(319) 753-5455
Sun - Wed 8am-Midnight
Thurs - Sat Open 24 Hours
www.LoversPlayground.com
Steve’s Place
852 Washington St, Burlington
319-754-5868
Unitarian Universalist Fellowship
Services start at 10:30 am
625 N 6th St, Burlington, IA 52601-5032
(319) 753-1895 - www.uuburlington.org
Cedar Falls - Waterloo
Adult Cinema
315 E 4th St
Waterloo, IA 50703-4703
(319) 234-7459
One Iowa
500 East Locust St, Ste 300
Des Moines, IA 50309
515-288-4019 Fax: 515-244-5846
www.OneIowa.org
Black Hawk Co. Health Department
Free HIV testing (donations accepted);
MW, 1:00pm to 3:00pm; Thurs,
1:00pm to 4:45pm
1407 Independence Ave. (5th fl)
Waterloo 50703
319-291 -2413
Stonewall Democrats of Iowa
5 Creekside Ct Mason City, IA 50401
Contact: Harvey Ross
[email protected]
319-362-3099
Cedar AIDS Support System (CASS)
Service, support groups & trained volunteers
for persons with HIV/AIDS in Waterloo/CF
call Elizabeth or Karla,
319-272-AIDS(2437). [email protected]
Cedar Valley Counseling Services
Promoting personal growth and development
in a strengths-based environment
Joan E. Farstad, MA, Director.
319-240-4615
www.cvcounseling.com
[email protected].
Cedar Valley Episcopal Campus Ministry. In
Lutheran Center
2616 College St, Cedar Falls, IA
319-415-5747
[email protected]
www.episcopalcampus.org
Community AIDS Assistance Project (CAAP)
Funding for special personal needs, community projects, and small grants that are
AIDS related.
PO Box 36, Waterloo, IA 50704
LGBTA Support Group at
Hawkeye Community College
Call Carol at 319-296-4014 for time & location
of meeting
[email protected]
Iowa Legal Aid
Free civil legal service available to low income
persons who qualify under income/asset
guidelines.
607 Sycamore, #206, Waterloo, IA 50703
1-800-772-0039 or 319-235-7008
Kings & Queens Tap
304 W. 4th St, Waterloo, IA
www.//myspace.com/kingsandqueensspace
319-232-3001
Romantix Waterloo (Adult Emporium)
1507 La Porte Rd, Waterloo, IA 50702
319-234-9340
http://www.romantixonline.com/
Stellas Guesthouse
324 Summit Ave, Waterloo, IA
Private B&B, Overnight accommodations for
adults only.
319-232-2122
St. Lukes Episcopal Church
2410 Melrose Dr, Cedar Falls, IA 50613
www.st-lukes-episcopal.org
Services: Sunday 8:00 & 10:15, Thurs 11:30
319-277-8520
St. Timothys United Methodist Church 3220 Terrace Drive, Cedar Falls, 50613
sttims-umc.org, 319-266-0464, info@sttimsumc-org, Contact Rev. Linda Butler “...
welcome of all persons, including those of all
sexual orientations and gender identities.”
Together For Youth
233 Vold Dr, Waterloo, IA 50703
www.TogetherForYouth.net
319-274-6768
UNI-LGBTA
Alliance-Student Organization
244A Bartlet Hall, University of Northern Iowa
Cedar Falls 50613
[email protected]
319-222-0003
United Church of Christ Cedar Falls
9204 University Avenue, Cedar Falls
319-366-9686
Unitarian Universalist Society of
Black Hawk County
3912 Cedar Heights Dr, Cedar Falls, IA
319-266-5640
Cedar Rapids/marion
Adult Shop
630 66th Ave SW, 319-362-4939
Adult Shop North
5539 Crane Lane, 319-294-5360
Cedar Rapids Unity
(Formerly GLRC of Cedar Rapids)
Support, social activities.
[email protected], cedarrapidsunity.org or write
to PO Box 1643 Cedar Rapids 52406-1643
Call and leave a message—all calls will be
returned. 319-366-2055
Christ Episcopal Church
“We have a place for you.”
220 40th Street NE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52404
319-363-2029 www.ChristEpiscopal.org
Club Basix
Open 5pm to 2am M-F, Sat & Sun 3pm-2am
3916 1st Ave NE, Cedar Rapids
319-363-3194
CSPS Legion Arts Contemporary Arts Center
1103 3rd St. SE
[email protected]
319-364-1580
APRIL 2011
Heartland Gay Rodeo Association (HGRA)
(Midwest Division of the International Gay
Rodeo Association)
PO Box 3354, Omaha, NE 68103
www.hgra.net - 402-203-4680
HGRA serves both Iowa and Nebraska
Eden United Church of Christ
351 8th Ave SW, Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52404
(319) 362-7805
Sunday School 9am - Worship 10:15am
Imperial Court of Nebraska
P.O. Box 3772, Omaha, NE 68103
402-556-9907
Faith UMC
1000 30th Street NE, Cedar Rapids, 52402
Sunday services at 11:00am.
www.crfaithumc.org
319-363-8454
Inclusive Life
“Religious and Non religious care, services
and ceremonies for all!”, 105 S. 49 Street,
Suite E, Omaha, NE 68132, (402) 575-7006,
http://inclusifelife.org
Foundation 2 Crisis Counseling
24-hour telephone crisis counseling.
[email protected] or
www.f2online.org
1540 2nd Ave. SE Cedar Rapids, IA
319-362-2174 or 800-332-4224
The Max
1417 Jackson at 15th, Omaha, NE 68102
6 bars in 1 - 402-346-4110
Linn County Public Health
501 13th NW
Free confidential HIV testing,
319-892-6000
Linn County Stonewall Democrats
2nd Wednesday of every month, 6:30-8 p.m.
The LGBT Caucus of the Democratic Party,
meets at March 9 we will be at the Kirkwood
Hotel Lobby Cafe.After that we may go back
to Blue Strawberry downtown, but we need
time to check our options. For more info,
contact linnstonewall@ gmail.com
Rapid AIDS
Grant Wood Area Red Cross
3600 Rockwell Dr NE, Cedar Rapids, 52410
319-393-9579.
People’s Church Unitarian Universalist
A welcoming congregation.
600 Third Avenue SE
11am Sunday. 319-362-9827
PFLAG CR, Linn Co and Beyond
Meets at People’s Church (in Cherry Room)
600 3rd ST, Cedar Rapids Iowa 52401
Contact Person: Diane Peterson
Phone: 319-362-9827
6:30pm on the 4th Thursdays except
months like November. (Email
[email protected] for alternate dates.)
Stonewall Democrats of Linn County
Contact Roy Porterfield, meet 2nd Wednesday of the Month, 6:30-8pm, For the February
9 meeting we will be at Coffee Talk Cafe on
37 Kirkwood Court Southwest, Cedar Rapids,
IA 52404. That’s next to Kirkwood Blvd just
south of Hwy 30 on the left.
[email protected], 319-362-5281
Toxic Nightclub
616 Second Ave SE, Cedar Rapids
Tri-ess, Iota Kappa Phi Chapter
P.O. Box 8605, Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52408
We are a transgendered organization supporting crossdressers, their families, and friends.
www.yahoo.com/group/Tri-essIotaKappaPhi
www.tri-ess.org, 319-390-6376
E-mail: Georgia [email protected]
E-mail: Judy [email protected]
Unity Center of Cedar Rapids
“A center of positive, practical Christianity.”
3791 Blairs Ferry Rd NE, Cedar Rapids
www.unitycr.org - (319) 393-5422
CLINTON
Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Clinton
309 30th Avenue North, Clinton, IA 52732
(563) 242-4972 - uuclinton.org
Sunday services at 10:30 (year-round)
Where YOUR spiritual and ethical journey is
welcome! Rev. Ruby Nancy, minister
Council Bluffs, Omaha (Ne)
AIDS Interfaith Network
100 N. 62nd, Omaha, NE
Call Br. Wm. Woeger
402-558-3100
Broadway Joe’s
3400 W Broadway, Council Bluffs, IA 51501
712-256-2243
Citizens For Equal Protection
1105 Howard St, Suite #2, Omaha, NE 68102
www.cfep-ne.org - [email protected]
402-398-3027
Council Bluffs NOW
Write PO Box 3325, Omaha, NE 68103-0325
Coe Alliance
Education, activism & fun for GLBTQ and
straight students, staff and people from the
community.
Coe College
1220 First Ave NE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52402
For information contact: [email protected]
or Erica Geers, faculty advisor at
319-861-6025
DC’s Saloon
610 S. 14th St., Omaha, NE
Open everyday 2pm-1am,
western/levi/leather.
402-344-3103
Community Health Free Clinic
947 14th Avenue SE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52401
319-363-0416 www.communityhfc.org
Free Medical Services provided for the
uninsured and underserved patients of Cedar
Rapids, Marion and the surrounding areas in
Eastern Iowa.
GLBT Rainbow Outreach Omaha
Serving GLBT community in eastern
Nebraska and western Iowa. Excellent message and info. Also office for Imperial court
of Nebraska.
1719 Leavenworth St, Omaha, NE
www.rocc.org - 402-341-0330
Front Runners/Front Walkers
Walking/jogging club.
P.O. Box 4583, Omaha, NE 68104
402-496-3658.
MCC Omaha
819 South 22nd, Omaha, NE 68103
Sun 9 & 11 am
Wednesday “ReCharge” Worship, Wed 7pm
402-345-2563
PFLAG Omaha
Mead Hall, First United Methodist Church
7020 Cass St. (Omaha)
2nd Thursday, 7, 6:30 Social time
402-291-6781
River City Mixed Chorus
Gay/lesbian chorus
PO Box 3267
Omaha, NE 68103
Call Stan Brown, marketing
402-341-7464.
Romantix Council Bluffs (North)
(Adult Emporium)
3216 1st Ave, Council Bluffs, IA 51501-3353
515-955-9756
Tri-ess Chapter, Kappa Phi Lambda Chapter
Omaha, NE 68107
We are a transgendered organization supporting crossdressers, their families, and friends.
www.tri-ess.org, 402-960-9696
E-mail: Judy [email protected]
Romantix Council Bluffs (South)
(Romantix After Dark)
50662 189th St, Council Bluffs, IA 51503
712-366-1764
Youth Support Group for GLBT
Youth 13-21, meets twice monthly.
Omaha, NE - 402-291- 6781
Decorah
Decorah Human Rights Commission
Contact: City Clerk
400 Clairborne Dr, Decorah
563-382-3651
Meetings: First Tuesdays, 5:30pm
Luther College Student Congregation
Contact Office for College Ministry
700 College Dr, Decorah, IA 52101
563-387-1040.
PFLAG Northeast IA (Waukon/Decorah)
First Lutheran Church
604 W Broadway St, Decorah, IA
Meetings: 4th Mondays, 7pm-9pm
in the Fellowship Hall
Call Jean @ 563-535-7680
PRIDE Luther College Diversity Center,
700 College Dr, Decorah, IA 52101
Contact Chris at 563-387-2145 or Melanie at
563-387-1273
Unitarian Universalist Fellowship
Meets alternating Sundays at 10:30am,
Decorah Senior Center
806 River St
Call Bill at 563-382-3458.
Des Moines
AIDS Project of Central Iowa
Free HIV testing, prevention supplies,
care services, food pantry, information.
711 E. 2nd, Des Moines, IA 50309
515-284-0245
Blazing Saddle
416 E 5th St, Des Moines, IA - 515-246-1299
www.theblazingsaddle.com
Buddies Corral
418 E 5th St, Des Moines, IA - 515-244-7140
The CENTER
1300 Locust
The new LGBT and progressive place to be.
[email protected]
Facebook: The CENTER & Equality Iowa
www.equalityiowa.org 515-243-0313
Church of the Holy Spirit-MCC
Pastor Pat Esperanza
Sunday service 10:30am at the
1st Christian Church
2500 University, Des Moines
Des Moines Diversity Chorus [A gay-friendly
mixed chorus] Rehearsals on Mondays at 7
p.m. at Westminster Presbyterian Church,
Beaver Ave. at Franklin St., Des Moines.
All are welcome, no auditions.
PO Box 65312, West Des moines, IA 50265
Julie Murphy, Artistic Director
[email protected], 515-255-3576,
desmoinesdiversitychorus.org
APRIL 2011
Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus
515-953-1540
4126 Ingersoll Ave., Des Moines
[email protected]
Family Practice Center
Safe, supportive LGBT health care.
200 Army Post Road, Ste 26
www.ppgi.org
515-953-7560
First Friday Breakfast Club
Educational breakfast club for gay/bisexual
men. Meets first Friday of each month.
Contact Jonathan Wilson for meeting topic
and place. 515-288-2500
[email protected] www.ffbciowa.org
First Unitarian Church
1800 Bell Avenue
Services Sundays at 9:30 & 11am
515-244-8603, www.ucdsm.org
The Gallery (adult store)
1000 Cherry St
Des Moines, IA 50309-4227
(515) 244-2916 Open 24 Hours
www.LoversPlayground.com
The Garden
112 SE 4th Des Moines, IA
515-243-3965
Wed-Sun. 8pm-2am www.grdn.com
Gay & Lesbian AA & AI-Anonymous
Mon. 7 pm; Tues. - Thurs. 6 pm; Sat. 5:30
pm at Drake Ministries in Ed. Bldg. 28th &
University
Gay and Lesbian Issues Committee
4211 Grand Avenue, Level-3
Des Moines, IA 50312
515-277-1117
Java Joe’s
Gay friendly
214 4th St. , 515-288-5282,
www.javajoescoffeehouse.com
Lavender Victory Fund
Financial assistance for women in need for
medical emergencies.
[email protected]
Le Boi Bar
508 Indianola Rd, Des Moines, IA
Liberty Gifts
333 E. Grand Ave., Loft 105, Des Moines, IA
Gay owned specialty clothing, jewelry, home
decor. 515-508-0825
MINX Show Palace
1510 NE Broadway, Des Moines, IA 50313
Open m-th noon-2 a.m., f noon-3 am., sat 3
p.m.-e a.m.
515-266-2744
North Star Gay Rodeo Association of IGRA,
Iowa Division of North Star
[email protected] or 612-82-RODEO
Rainbow Union, Drake University
[email protected]
Ray Perry Law Firm
515-279-2244
Free Initial Consultation
PFLAG Des Moines
515-243-0313, 1300 Locust , Des Moines,
IA 50312
Plymouth Congregational UCC
Church and the Plymouth GLBT Community
4126 Ingersoll Ave. 515-255-3149
Services at 9am & I lam Sunday.
www.PlymouthGLBT.com
Polk County Health Department
Free STD, HIV, and Hepatitis B & C testing.
HIV. Rapid testing also offered.
1907 Carpenter, Des Moines, IA
515-286-3798.
Pride Alliance, AIB College of Business
Gay and straight students celebrating diversity
Contact: Mike Smith, Advisor
[email protected]
www.aib.edu/pride
Raccoon River Resort
Accommodations for men, women, or
mixed in campgrounds, lodge, Teepees or
Treehouses. Reservations: 515-996-2829 or
515-279-7312
Ritual Café
On 13th between Grand and Locust.
Gay owned great music, awesome food
and coffee. 515-288-4872
[email protected] - ritualcafe.com
Romantix North Des Moines Iowa
(Bachelor’s Library)
2020 E Euclid Ave, Des Moines, IA 50317
www.romantixonline.com 515-266-7992
Spouses of Lesbians & Gays
Support group for spouses of gays and
lesbians. 515-277-7754
St. John’s Lutheran Church
600 6th Ave
“A Church for All People.”
Services Sat 5pm, Sun 7:45, 8:45 & 11am.
See web page for other services.
515-243-7691 - www.StJohnsDSM.org
TransformationsIOWA
Monthly meetings for the female to male,
male to female, transgender community,
cross dressers, gender queer, questioning,
and their significant others. For location
and info, email at [email protected]
or call 515-979-6959
Trinity United Methodist Church
1548 Eighth Street - 515-288-4056
Services Sundays at 10am,
www.trinityumcdm.org
Urbandale UCC
An open & affirming congregation.
3530 70th St., Urbandale, IA 50322
515-276-0625, www.urbucc.org
Walnut Hills UMC
Join us at 8:30 or 10:45am for Sunday
worship. Sunday classes and group studies
are at 9:30am. 515-270-9226
12321 Hickman Rd, Urbandale, IA 50323
www.whumc.org
INDIANOLA
Crossroads United Church of Christ (UCC)
An Open & affirming congregation. Services:
Sunday 10:30am, Summer worship: June,
July, Aug, @ 9:30 am, worshiping in the
Lounge at Smith Chapel, Simpson College,
corner of Buxton and Clinton. Mailing address:
P.O. Box 811, Indianola, IA 50125
515-961-9370. www.crossroadsucc.org
Iowa City
AA (GLBT) 319-338-9111
Meetings Sundays 5 - 6pm at First Baptist
Church, 500 North Clinton Street. For more
info, call IC Intergroup Answering Service,
Congregational Church UCC
An Open and Affirming Congregation
Sunday Worship 10:15 a.m.
30 N. Clinton St. (across from Ul Pentacrest)
319-337-4301 - www.uiccic.org
Westminster Presbyterian Church
4114 Allison Ave - www.WestPres.org
Sunday services 8:45 and 11am. Of note is
their GAY-LESBIAN-STRAIGHT AFFIRMATION GROUP, GLSA 515-274-1534
Counseling Clinic 319-354-6238
Lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender sensitive and supportive counseling for individuals,
couples, families and groups. Sliding Fee.
505 E Washington St., Iowa City, IA 52240
Women’s Culture Collective (WCC)
A lesbian social group.
Des Moines, IA - www.iowawcc.org
Counseling and Health Center 319-337-1679
Client-centered therapy.
Les-Bi-Gay-Trans always welcome.
616 Bloomington St, Iowa City, IA
Zanzibar’s Coffee Adventure
Open daily. Gay-friendly
2723 Ingersoll, Des Moines, IA
515-244-7694
Dubuque
Adult Warehouse
975 Jackson St., Dubuque, IA
563-588-9184.
Dubuque Friends Worship Group (Quakers)
Join us at an unprogrammed meeting on
Sunday at 10am. Open and Affirming
St. Mark’s Community Center
1201 Locust Street, Dubuque, Iowa 52001
563-582-0220, www.smcdbq.org
Dubuque Regional AIDS Coalition
Direct services, education. HIV+/AIDS support group and family/friends support group.
Contact Kay Auderer or Connie Sprimont,
Mercy Health Center.1300 Main St, Dubuque,
IA 52001, 319-589-4181
Crisis Center 319-351-0140
1121 Gilbert Court, Iowa City, 52240
Emma Goldman Clinic
227 N. Dubuque St, Iowa City, IA 52245
319-337-2111or 1-800-848-7684.
Faith United Church of Christ
1609 De Forest Street, Iowa City, IA
Services Sundays at 9:30am 319-338-5238
GLBTAU-U of lA
Student support system and resource center,
info, activism, events, and other community
involvements.
203 IMU, University of IA
Iowa City, IA 52242-1317
[email protected] 319-335-3251 (voice mail)
Hope United Methodist Church
Worship Service at 9:30am.
2929 E. Court St., Iowa City, IA
Contact Rev. Sherry Lohman. 319-338-9865
PFLAG Dubuque
St. John’s Lutheran Church
1276 White St.
3rd Thursday, 7pm 563-581-4606 or
563-503-5850
Human Rights Commission
(City of Iowa City Human Rights Commission)
319-356-5022; 391-356-5015; 319-356-5014
Fax 319-887-6213
[email protected]
Q Bar East
90 Sinsinawa Ave, The Strip,
East Dubuque, IL 61025
[email protected]
ICARE
(Iowa Center for AIDS Resources &
Education) Practical & emotional support,
youth programs, information, referrals and
support groups.
3211 E 1st Iowa City, IA 52240-4703
319-338-2135
Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Dubuque
1699 Iowa St., Dubuque, IA
“The uncommon denomination.”
general services at 10am.
www.uuf-dbq.org 563-583-9910
ELKADER
Bethany Church (ELCA)
307 3rd St NE, Elkader IA 52043
Pastor Jim Klosterboer 563-245-1856
www.alpinecom.net/~bethanychurch
[email protected]
Inclusive. Welcoming. Discover the Difference. Bethany is a Reconciling in Christ
congregation of LC/NA
Schera’s Restaurant and Bar
107 S Main St, Elkader, IA 52043
563-245-1992 Scheras.com
E-mail: [email protected]
Fine dining featuring Algerian & American
Cuisine. Voted Best Mediterranean Restaurant in Eastern Iowa on KCRG TV-9’s A*List.
Fort Dodge
Romantix Fort Dodge (Mini Cinema)
Sun-Thu 10am-12am, Fri & Sat 10am-2am
515-955-9756
15 N. 5th St, Fort Dodge, IA 50501-3801
RomantixOnline.com
Grinnell
Saints Ephrem & Macrina
Orthodox Mission. Welcoming worship in
the Eastern Christian liturgical tradition.
Sunday services at 10am. (Affiliated with the
Orthodox-Catholic Church of America.)
Divine Liturgy is served Sundays during the
College academic year 1:30 p.m., Herrick
Chapel, Grinnell College Campus
1226 Broad Street, Grinnell, IA
641-236-0936
Stonewall Resource Center
Open 4:30pm to 11:30pm,
Sun through Thurs and by Appointment.
Grinnell College
1210 Park Street
PO Box B-1, Grinnell, IA, 50112
Iowa City Free Medical Clinic
Free & strictly confidential HIV Testing.
2440 Towncrest Dr Iowa City,
Call for appointment 319-337-4459
Iowa City NOW
PO Box 2944, Iowa City, IA 52244
for information & meeting times/places
Iowa Women’s Music Festival
P.O. Box 3411, Iowa City, IA 52244
319-335-1486
Men Supporting Men 319-356-6038, Ext 2
HIV prevention program exploring issues that
gay/bisexual men deal with on a daily basis.
Discussion Groups, Educational Series, Safer
Sex Workshops, Book Club. Contact Andy
Weigel, email: [email protected]
New Song Episcopal Church
912 20th Ave, Coralville, IA
Sunday services at 10am.
Rev. Elizabeth Coulter, Pastor
Rev. John Harper, Associate.
319-351-3577
Pride Committee
WRAC
130 N. Madison, Iowa City, IA 52242
Bridget Malone - 319-338-0512
Charles Howes - 319-335-1486.
Romantix Iowa City
(Pleasure Palace I)
315 Kirkwood Ave, Iowa City, IA 52240-4722
www.romantixonline.com 319-351-9444
Studio 13
13 S. Linn St. (in the Alley)
Iowa City, IA
Open 7pm ‘til 2am, daily 319-338-7145
Thich Nhat Hanh based
“Mindfulness” meditation and study group
Iowa City Public Library, Sundays 1 to 2:30pm
Usually Room E
319-354-4065
U of I Lesbian, Gay & Bisexual
Staff & Faculty Association
c/o WRAC, 130 N Madison, Iowa City, IA
52242, 19-335-1486
Unitarian Universalist Society of Iowa City
Inclusive and free religious community
nurturing intellectual and spiritual growth and
fostering ethical and social responsibility.
10 S. Gilbert, Iowa City, IA
Sunday services: 9:30am & 11:15am.
www.uusic.org 319-337-3443
United Action for Youth (UAY)
A GLBTQA youth group providing support and
counseling for teenagers and young adults
processing sexual identity issues. Meets
Mondays 7-9pm at UAY
410 Iowa Ave. Iowa City, IA
319-338-7518 or Teen Line, 319-338-0559.
The Ursine Group
Bear Events in the Midwest.
PO Box 1143, Iowa City, IA 52244-1143
319-338-5810
Vortex Gifts
211 E. Washington, downtown Iowa City
319-337-3434
Women’s Resource Action Center (WRAC)
Leads & collaborates on projects that serve
U of l and the greater community, offers social
& support services, including LGBT Coming
Out Group.
University of Iowa
130 N Madison, Iowa City, IA 52242
319-335-1486
Marshalltown
Adult Odyssey (Adult Video Store)
907 Iowa Ave E - 641-752-6550
Domestic Violence Alternatives/
Sexual Assault Center, Inc., 132 W Main St.
24 hour Crisis Line: 641-753-3513 or (instate
only) 800-779-3512
MASON CITY
Cerro Gordo County Dept. of Public Health
22 N. Georgia Ave, Ste 300 Mason City, IA
50401. Free confidential AIDS testing.
641-421-9321
PFLAG North Iowa Chapter 641-583-2848,
[email protected], Carlos O’Kelly’s
Mexican Cafe @ 7 p.m. Wed.
Mount Vernon
Alliance Cornell College
810 Commons Cir # 2035
[email protected]
orgs.cornellcollege.edu/alliance/
Pella
Common Ground (Central College)
Support group for GLBT students and allies.
Contact: Brandyn Woodard,
Director of Intercultural Life
Quad Cities
AIDS Project Quad Cities
Info, education & support. Davenport, IA
52804, www.apqc4life.org 319-762-LIFE
Augie’s Tap
313 20th St, Rock Island (IL)
Noon - 3am daily. 309-788-7389
Black Hawk College Unity Alliance
Serving GLBT community at
Black Hawk College.
6600 34th Ave, Rock Island, IL
309-716-0542.
Connections Nightclub 563-322-1121
822 W 2nd St, Davenport, IA 52802
DeLaCerda House 309-786-7386
Provides housing & supportive services, advocacy and referrals for people living with HIV/
AIDS. P.O. Box 4551, Rock Island, Il. 61201
Good Samaritan Free Clinic
602 35th Avenue Moline, IL 309-797-4688
[email protected] - Provides free primary
medical care to patients age 16-64 who are
working but have no medical insurance. Patients are seen by volunteer physicians, nurss
practicioners, and physician assistants.
www.GoodSamaritanFreeClinic.org
The Hole-In-The-Wall 309-289-2375
A Private Membership Men’s Club
Located 3 miles east of Galesburg, IL
just north of I-74 at Exit 51
www.HoleInTheWallMensClub.org
Holy Spirit Catholic Faith Community
Meets one Sunday per month for Mass at
6:30pm at MCC-QC
3019 N. Harrison St, Davenport, IA
Mailing: PO Box 192 East Moline, IL 61244
For more info, call 309-278-3359
Mary’s On 2nd 563-884-8014
832 W. 2nd St. Davenport, IA
MCC Quad Cities - Svcs Sat 5pm, Sun 11am
Bible study Wed 7pm 563-324-8281
3019 N Harrison, Davenport, IA 52803
Men’s Coming Out/Being Out Group
Meets 2nd & 4th Thursdays, 7pm.
[email protected]
309-786-2580
ACCESSline Page 37
PFLAG Quad Cities 563-285-4173
Eldridge United Methodist Church
604 S.2nd St., Eldridge 1st Monday, 6:30 pm
Prism (Augustana College) 309-794-7406
Augustana Gay-Straight Alliance
Augustana Library
639 38th St, Rock Island, IL
Contact Tom Bengston
Quad Citians Affirming Diversity (QCAD) Social & support groups for lesbian, bi, and gay
teens, adults, friends & families; newsletter.
309-786-2580 - Community Center located at
1608 2nd Ave, Rock Island.
Quad Cities Pride Chorus
At the MCC Church in D’port, 7pm Wed.
[email protected]
Call Don at 563-324-0215
Rainbow Gifts
www.rainbowgifts.net
309-764-0559
T.R. Video
Adult books & video
3727 Hickory Grove Rd, Davenport, IA
563-386-7914
Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the
Quad Cities
Sunday Service 11am
3707 Eastern Avenue, Davenport, IA 52807
563-359-0816
Venus News (Adult)
902 W 3rd St, Davenport, IA
563-322-7576
Red Oak
First Congregational United Church of Christ
608 E Reed St, Red Oak, IA 51566
(712) 623-2794 Rev. Elizabeth Dilley, Pastor
uccwebsites.net/firstcongredoakia.html
[email protected]
Open and affirming.
SHENANDOAH
PFLAG Shenandoah
712-899-2743
Sioux City
Am. Business & Professional Guild.
Gay Businessmen.
Meets last Sat. of the month; ABPG
P. O. BOX 72, Sioux City, 51102
[email protected]
Grace United Methodist Church
1735 Morningside Avenue
712-276-3452.
Jones Street Station (Bar) 712-258-6922
412 Jones St.
Nightly 6:00pm to 2:00am.
Mayflower Congregational Church.
1407 West 18th Street
Call 712-258-8278.
Morningside College
Lesbian/Gay/Bisexual Alliance 712-274-5208
Contact Professor Gail Dooley, Advisor
Morningside College GSA
1501 Morningside Ave.
Sioux City, IA 51106-1717
[email protected]
PFLAG Siouxland
PO Box 1311, Sioux City, IA 51102
[email protected]
Romantix Sioux City 712-277-8566
(Adult Emporium)
511 Pearl St, Sioux City, IA 51101-1217
St. Thomas Episcopal Church
Service Sun 10:30am
406 12th St, Waverly, IA
Rev Mary Christopher 712-258-0141
Western Iowa Tech. GSA
[email protected] for info.
Zaner’s Bar 712-277-9575
3103 N Hwy 75, Sioux City, IA 51105
Monthly drag shows & events; hometown bar
for Imperial Court of Iowa’s Western Chapter
[email protected]
Waverly
Cedar Valley Episcopal Campus Ministry.
717 W. Bremer, (St. Andrew’s Episcopal)
Waverly, IA
www.episcoplcampus.org
319-415-5747
Gay, Lesbian Bisexual Student Alliance
Wartburg College, Waverly, IA 50677
Contact Susan Vallem
319-352-8250
St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church
717 W. Bremer
We welcome all to worship with us on Sunday
at 10:30am. Bible discussion Wed. 6:45pm
Rev. Maureen Doherty, Pastor 319-352-1489
ACCESSline Page 38
US NEWS
groups from meeting rather than allow
the GSA to form.
“It shouldn’t have taken this long and
this much struggle to start a club whose
purpose is to make our school a safer space
for all students,” said Peet. “We can’t wait
for the first meeting.”
California Legislature
may demand military
stop fining gays
down a third bill that would have forceconverted same-sex marriages into a new
kind of civil union different from the civil
unions New Hampshire used to have.
Some 1,400 same-sex couples have
married in New Hampshire.
Same-sex marriage also is legal in
Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, Vermont
and Washington, D.C. In addition, same-sex
marriages from anywhere in the world
are recognized as marriages in Maryland,
New Mexico, New York, Rhode Island and
California (if the marriage took place before
Proposition 8 passed) even though those
states do not let same-sex couples marry.
Eleven other nations allow same-sex
couples to marry—Argentina, Belgium,
Canada, Iceland, the Netherlands, Norway,
Portugal, South Africa, Spain, Sweden and
Mexico (where same-sex marriages are
allowed only in the capital city but are
recognized nationwide).
Wyoming Senate kills
anti-gay-marriage bill
Christine Kehoe. Photo by Rex Wockner.
California state Sen. Christine Kehoe
introduced a resolution sponsored by
Equality California on March 9 calling on
President Barack Obama, Congress and
Defense Secretary Robert Gates to stop
fining LGB servicemembers who were
discharged under Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.
Said EQCA: “Although DADT has been
found to be unconstitutional as a violation of the First and Fifth Amendments,
and the U.S. Congress passed a repeal that
was signed by the president, the military continues to demand that our brave
soldiers who were unfairly discharged by
this outrageous policy pay for their education because they were discharged.”
Wyoming’s Senate voted 16-14 March
2 to kill a bill banning recognition of samesex marriages entered into in other states
and nations.
The bill was designed to counteract a
state law that recognizes legal marriages
from other states and countries.
Wyoming lawmakers also recently
killed a proposal to amend the state constitution to ban same-sex marriage.
San Diego mayoral race
has 3 gay/lesbian candi—
dates
The June 2012 election for mayor
of San Diego, America’s eighth-largest
city, could have three openly gay/lesbian
candidates.
Geoff Kors. Photo by Rex Wockner.
Bonnie Dumanis. Photo by Rex Wockner.
EQCA Executive Director Geoff Kors
called the demands for repayment, which
have topped $75,000 in some cases,
“beyond offensive.”
Republican District Attorney Bonnie
Dumanis and Republican City Councilman
Carl DeMaio already have filed papers, and
Democratic state Sen. Christine Kehoe is
widely expected to file shortly.
Kehoe, as the only Democrat in the
group, probably would garner the most
support from the city’s LGBT activists.
Dumanis took immediate fire from
local Democratic gay leaders as she
announced her candidacy March 10, with
the predominantly gay San Diego Democratic Club accusing her of being more loyal
to the GOP than to her fellow LGBTs.
The club said that in last year’s statewide elections, Dumanis supported Republican candidates for governor and attorney
general who vowed to reverse the state’s
Gay marriage safe in
New Hampshire for now
New Hampshire’s Legislature will not
vote in 2011 on either of two bills aimed at
repealing the two-year-old law that made
same-sex marriage legal.
Members of the House Judiciary
Committee voted 15-0 without debate
March 3 to place the bills on hold until
2012.
The committee unanimously voted
policy of refusing to defend Proposition 8 in
court. Those candidates lost, and Gov. Jerry
Brown and Attorney General Kamala Harris
have continued the nondefense policy. (Six
days later, the SDDC corrected its statement, saying that Dumanis had remained
neutral in the attorney general race.)
“Although I consider Bonnie a friend
and believe she has been an effective judge
and district attorney, there are significant
policy issues where progressives disagree
with her,” said SDDC President Doug
Case. “Her loyalty appears to rest more
with the Republican Party than the LGBT
community as witnessed by some of her
endorsements.”
Prop 8, passed by voters in November
2008, amended the California Constitution to re-ban same-sex marriage. It was
later struck down as unconstitutional by a
federal judge in San Francisco. That decision is now on appeal at the 9th U.S. Circuit
Court of Appeals.
Supreme Court OKs
Phelps funeral pickets
The U.S. Supreme Court ruled 8-1 on
March 2 that Kansas’ Westboro Baptist
Church has a constitutional right to picket
military funerals carrying signs that say
such things as “God hates fags.”
The court said the church’s “speech”
is “certainly hurtful and its contribution
to public discourse may be negligible,” but
the pickets are nonetheless protected by
the First Amendment.
“Speech is powerful. It can stir people
to action, move them to tears of both joy and
sorrow, and—as it did here—inflict great
pain,” the court said. “On the facts before us,
we cannot react to that pain by punishing
the speaker. As a nation we have chosen a
different course—to protect even hurtful
speech on public issues to ensure that we
do not stifle public debate. That choice
requires that we shield Westboro from tort
liability for its picketing in this case.”
The church had been sued by the
family of a fallen soldier whose funeral its
members picketed.
Justice Samuel A. Alito Jr. disagreed
with the court’s majority, saying, “Our
profound national commitment to free and
open debate is not a license for the vicious
verbal assault that occurred in this case.”
Most national gay organizations did
not respond to the decision. Kate Kendell,
APRIL 2011
executive director of the National Center for
Lesbian Rights, was the exception.
Kate Kendell. Photo by Rex Wockner.
“What is striking about today’s decision
is not the court’s legal analysis, which does
not break new ground, but the spotlight this
case shines on the despicable character and
hatefulness of anti-gay bigotry,” Kendell
said. “Can you imagine fighting for the
right to spew hatred at a funeral? What an
appalling indictment of those who oppose
our humanity and equality.”
Immigration Equality to
sue federal government
The LGBT group Immigration Equality
is planning to sue the federal government
over the Defense of Marriage Act because it
prevents married U.S. citizens from bringing their foreign same-sex spouses to live
with them in U.S. states that allow same-sex
marriage or recognize same-sex marriages
from elsewhere.
The planned lawsuit follows President
Barack Obama’s recent instruction to the
Justice Department that it stop defending
in court the section of DOMA that bans
the federal government from recognizing
states’ same-sex marriages.
Immigration Equality said it believes
there is a good chance the lawsuit will
succeed, at least for legally married samesex couples in states that allow or recognize
same-sex marriages.
couples marry.
Assistance: Bill Kelley
APRIL 2011
ACCESSline Page 39

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