AUFC Round 5 13

SUBSTANDARD
The Blacks’ Organ
Vol 6, May 11, 2013
Greetings and welcome to Volume 6 of Substandard, the Blacks Organ, for season 2013. Another big week at
the Blacks, especially in the media, that has ended on a very sombre note with the passing of Blacks legend
Paul Rofe. All teams will be wearing black armbands this weekend and we will be having a minutes silence at
Uni Oval before the A grade game to remember one of the true greats of the club. It is also Ladies Day at Uni
Oval, all teams have winnable games and Colebatch is hosting Bowlies so it makes for a huge and emotional
Saturday for the Worlds Greatest Football Club.
You may also be interested in some additional media exposure that we received this week regarding the
points system, nice work Daddsy!
http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/sport/afl/blacks-want-student-exemption/story-fn526193-1226637734039
Lastly, its Rulebook I mean Rulei’s birthday today. Merry birthday to you Captain Sapsassa, 10 years ago
today the Captain was leading a posse of rum fuelled Blacks cubs around the Caribbean spreading the word
of Bob...those were the days.
As always please get in touch with us at [email protected] or call 0414 488 282 with any feedback or
queries. See you at the Footy and then at the Cumby for a 7:00 sharp Hold your Bowlies start as we entertain
the fine ladies of the AUFC.
ROUND 5 GAMES – LADIES DAY AT BOB NEIL 1
Another big weekend of Blacks games and if were the punting type, which we are and even moreso this
weekend in honour of Rofey, then we’d be happy to have a little flutter on the Blacks in bulk this weekend.
Tough game for the Yoko Oh-No’s but Ladies Day on the sidelines should provide a solid degree of motivation
(be sure to bring extra oil before the game Boz, the lads need to look their best) and the 6/6R teams who
have been battling travel out norf to take out a dis-united mob who are also struggling a dash – a great
chance to turn things around. The B*stards, who are full of spooners themselves, which somewhat explains
why they only turn up ready to play every so often (it’s their right), always look forward to the Spooner derby
so they may even pull up stumps before 2am Friday night. All positive signs. Games as follows:
Div 1 (Beatle Lennon and the Yoko Oh-No's!!)
Div 1R (Spud O'Reilly & the non-fighting Irish)
Div 6 (Sexy Pimp and his C-Men)
Div 6R (The Kenny Everett Video Show)
Div 8 (The Chardonnay Socialists)
Div 8R (The Scum)
Div C1 (The B*stards)
Over 35s (The Greys)
Womens Team (The Pinks)
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
Silver Spooners at Bob Neil # 1
Silver Spooners at Bob Neil # 1
Central Dis-United at Muff Reserve
Central Dis-United at Muff Reserve
Smallsbury at Tiny Town
Smallsbury at Tiny Town
Silver Spooners at Bob Neil # 2, 12:15
Bye at home with the family
The Poos at Poo Park, Sunday at 2:00
Tickets are still available for Ladies Day on Saturday. Kick off 1:00, $40 ticket includes:
- Wines, champers, beer, soft drink, juice, tea & coffee.
- Gourmet lunch - BBQ & salads.
- Entertainment and Guest MC, potentially including that super look-a-like above.
- Fun games and Giveaways.
- After party at the Cumby with special ladies day drink specials
Contact Ben lewis 0401 800 757 or Tom Walker 0438 716 787 for tickets.
PAUL ROFE QC / CHF
The AUFC is deeply saddened at the passing of one of the genuine legends of the club. Paul Rofe passed away
peacefully on Tuesday after a long illness, he was 65. As we look back through the record books it is difficult
to find a more giant figure both on and off-field in the history of the club...Rofey sits up there with the very
very best and will undoubtably be recognised in the newly formed Hall of Fame in the future.
From the Record Books
PJL Rofe began with University football Club in 1966 and immediately began to build a reputation that was to
make him one of the best amateur footballers ever seen and a legend of ‘the Blacks’.
Paul played for the A1 side for a (then) record 11 consecutive seasons up until 1976 and captained the team
from 1969 to 1973 when K.R. Griffiths was appointed Captain-Coach for the 1974 season. Paul was a key
player in the Premiership wins of 1968 (celebrating 45 years on July 13), 1969, 1974 and 1975. His strong
character and exceptional leadership skills ensured that all sides that he played in were highly competitive.
By the time he retired in 1976, Paul had played 224 games for ‘the Blacks’.
As well as these feats with University, Paul’s record with the State Amateur League teams is also very
impressive. He first played State football in 1969 and continued to be an automatic choice at centre or
centre half forward up until 1974. He was Vice-captain of the State team in 1972 and 1973 and Captain in
1974.
Paul won the AAFC Medal for the Best and Fairest Player at the Amateur Carnival in Melbourne in 1973 - the
only South Australian player to have achieved this honour. He gained All-Australian selection in 1974 and
was Captain of the side that competed in Division II of the ANFC Championship.
Paul has been a great Club member off the field as well as excelling on it, being active in several areas. In
1967 he was Assistant Secretary to Ian Jonasson and in 1968 he assumed the Secretary’s position. In this role
he was, along with R.G. Gask, instrumental in the hosting of a most successful Inter-Varsity Carnival in
Adelaide that year. Paul was awarded the Best Club Man trophy. He joined the Blues Committee of the
Sports Association in 1970 and continued to represent the Club for over ten years in this area.
In 1980, Paul was appointed coach of the Club, but unfortunately employment commitments forced him to
resign that position. Subsequently he accepted the role of Football Director and remained in that role until
1984, helping with selection, practice and acting as an adviser to the Club coach. In essence this was the role
that then morphed into the role that Chocka made his own over the next 20 years.
Paul was active with the Amateur League following his retirement as a player in roles such as State team
Selector and Chair of the Amateur Status Tribunal. Paul Rofe was elected to Honorary Life Membership of the
Club in 1981, along with Professor Geoff Harcourt. He stands as one of the legends of the Adelaide
University Football Club.
Some snippets on Rofey
• The JT Goose....After a few years out of the game Rofey accepted the position of head coach in 1980. The
players really enjoyed his pre-season training which comprised shots for goal, then circle work, then
shower, then beer. However, with just one week to go before the start of the season, he announced the
dramatic news that he had just won the position of crown prosecutor for Darwin, and given that it was
easier to prosecute the criminals in Darwin itself than try and do it by wireless from Adelaide, he was
moving to Darwin pronto. This threw the Club into a panic, even more so when it was discovered that all
the coaches who could coach were already doing so at other clubs. But desperate times demand
desperate action, and so Bloch was appointed in his place. No sooner had the bald one moved in and
begun frantically to try and learn the players’ names, than Rofey announced he had changed his mind and
was not going to Darwin after all. But given that the season had commenced it would be best if Bloch
continued as coach cause he already knew at least half the names. Club history book
• The day he resigned as DPP, he was quizzed by a journo from The Tiser who said “Well, Mr Rofe, when I
asked you a couple of weeks ago whether you would resign, you assured me you wouldn’t, which I
reported in my story. Now, very soon after that story appeared, you’ve resigned. What do you say about
that?”. Rofe’s swift reply was gold – and guttural as usual - “Well, that just shows that you shouldn’t ever
believe anything you read in The Advertiser!” The big crowd (except the questioner) cracked up. Rox
Wellington
• Rofey wasn’t one for long conversations but he did take me aside at an annual dinner at a time when I
was trying to get bail for a high profile client who had been charged with attempted murder. Rofey
offered to consent to bail on condition that said client live with me. Kinda put things into perspective in a
few short words. Daddsy
• I do recall Rofey coaching one game, might have been that year that Chocka came in late. I distinctly
remember him sitting in the front row of the stand at Bob Neil no. 1 with a pie in one hand, a cigarette in
the other, a form guide on his lap and an earpiece from his transistor radio in one ear as he listened to the
races – all while he was supposed to be coaching us to an A1 premiership! A legend. Mick Kenny
• His quiet, solid presence in front of the Uni Oval long room on match day with glass of red in one hand
(and a few years back...a fat cigar) will be sorely missed. Gordo
• One of the first speeches Jim Kat gave me as a youngster (under 11s, I think), was about toughness and
how Rofey once played with a broken leg. As a fairly soft 11 year old, I was in awe. Dad also talked often
about how the Rosewater and Port/Rivvies guys were genuinely scared of him, and how he would singlehandedly tear games apart. He was also very encouraging to me when I went back to do law, which I
always appreciated. Tom Kat
• I also vividly recall seeing Rofey just after our debacle of a prelim final loss to the Silver Spooners back in
2011. All he could do was shake his head in disappointment (and stronger than that i suspect). So it is with
some degree of pride that we were able to share with a clearly unwell Rofey the satisfaction of returning
to division 1 after the Second Semi Final of 2012 at Thebby Oval. As we celebrate his life and contribution
on Saturday the club is back where it belongs. Bridgy
• The ultimate in Blacks folklore. Best amateur player in the land, courted by the VFL, softly spoken
dominator, true amateur, reached the top of his profession. When I finished school and was choosing a
football club, the old man (who never really played football) went on and on about Rofey and the Blacks.
Vale CHF/DPP. Tom Martin
On Saturday Jim Katsaros will be addressing the players in the room before the game at around 1:15 and we
would encourage past players to attend as well. We will also have a minutes silence and Susie Biggs, Rofey’s
long time partner, will toss the coin. Vale.
UPCOMING EVENTS
Last weekend the major announcement at Hold your Bowlies centred on the location and theme for Blacks
Ball 2013......drum roll please......Topham Mall Car Park, Level 6. It’s a strong signal that you’ve been banned
from most premises in the general vicinity of the city when you have to hold a Blacks Ball in a bloody car
park. Anyway, its a great concept and I’m sure the Ball committee this year, led by the Carlton Ruckman, will
pull off another memorable (hopefully for the right reasons) Ball. Tickets already on sale at the link below.
https://www.iwannaticket.com.au/event/blacks-ball-2013-NTczMw
Date
7/06/13
21/06/13
Event
Quiz Night
The Blacks Friday Lunch
Location
Friday Goodwood Community Centre
The Adelaide University Boat Club
29/06/13
1990s Reunion Lunch
Uni Oval Long room at midday
13/7/2013 Premiership Reunion Day
Uni Oval
3/08/13
Topham Car Park
BLACKS BALL
The Long Friday Lunch on the 21st of June will (most likely) be held at the Adelaide University Boat Club from
12:00-3:00 for those that need to get back to work afterwards. For those that don’t we will then adjourn to
the Long Room where Bar Manager Miles will take care of us. As mentioned previously, guest speaker is
Richard Colless, Swans President and Uni Football Club premiership legend (in Perth). Should be a cracking
afternoon so for now put it in the diary and we will send through details for you to RSVP next week.
FACEBOB
We now have 508 likes which is an amazing effort considering we effectively started from scratch last year.
Bob Neil’s love goes to brothers Heath for doing a sterling job with this, which also makes the life of the
Substandard Editor much easier (lots of cuttin n pastin).
Congratulations this week go to FaceBob's 500th fan* - Sandra Caon-Parsons, who Charlie “Bristles” Parsons
guarantees will be at the Culby to receive her personally signed Tom Colebatch footy card and a big warm
hug from the 'B*tch' himself.
*Close but no cigar, Demi Moore. Fair enough too, you should have liked the legend years ago.
As per last week Damain Leonard has once again uploaded some terrific photos, click below to have a look.
http://dldigital.smugmug.com/BobNeilBLACKS2013
HOLD YOUR BOWLIES FOR THE LADIES
After last weeks swearathon courtesy of Father Boot, who spent all of Sunday morning in confession, we
thought it appropriate to class up Bowlies for the ladies this week.
So who better to go to.
NO EXCUSE! Get to the pub at 6:45 for a 7:00 sharp Bowlies start. Cheap drinks, cheap food, free
entertainment, footy on the big screen, good blokes, hot chicks, sing songing, beer skolling. What more could
you ask for?
QUOTES OF THE WEEK
"Teach them not to head to Salisbury when they get asked to head to Seaford for starters” Adelaide’s leading
taxi driver when quizzed on what training the modern day cab driver needs.
“He only needs to so much as fart and we'll deregister him for life” SAAFL COO King Kernahan when asked by
the Advertiser journo about a young A Broads View lad who recently got suspended for only 7 weeks.
ROUND 4 RESULTS – ANOTHER FAIL BUT SOME IMPROVEMENT
4 out of 9, still a fail but it was a tough round of matches and in the biggest news of all the girls kicked a
goal!!! Sure it was in a scratch match because they didn’t have enough numbers to fill a team but a goals a
goal. The full A grade match report is below, others can be found on www.bobneil.com.
Div 1 (The Yoko Oh-No’s) 9.9.63 defeated by Ross n Trevor 14.10.94 (-31, 5 Cockburn points)
Goal Kickers: T. Bateman , S. Paynter , S. Rusling , C. Rohde , T. Walker , C. Bankes , C. Black , C. Parsons , G.
Hurley-Wellington
Best Players: C. Parsons, M. Allan, D. Crouch, G. Hurley-Wellington, C. Rohde, B. Davis
Out to Guy Sebastian we went with a lot of hope, as Guy always provides. Everything felt good until 17 seconds
into the first term and the Rocs had kicked their first, from then on we looked tired and second rate. 18 entries into
the 50 to 8 the ROCS way gives an indication of our efforts.
Second quarter was much the same, we had a wounded Sean is a still Rusling and were pushing all sorts of thing
up hill but then we peered towards the score board and saw we were only a goal down then bang scores a tied. Tex
crashes into their ruckman and Campo lays a crunching tackle on half time siren and the boys were up and about
and jogged to the break together.
Well that really tricked us as we thought they would take control of the game and wander back to HYB for a few
west end products but no we were completely beaten through a poor display of work rate which we will continue
to improve on.
Div 1 Reserves (The Non-Fighting Irish) 8.11.59 defeated Ross n Trevor 7.12.54 (+5, 6 Cockburn points)
Goal Kickers: M. Murdock 3, D. Blyth 2, T. Eldredge , W. Evans , M. Quin
Best Players: M. Quin, A. Alesci, A. Rowe, T. Eldredge, M. Daniel, E. Hewish
Good win against a solid team despite superstar full forward Goal line Mulva having his face smashed. Remain
undefeated.
Great photo of Kermit.
Div 6 (The C-Men) 4.8.32 defeated by Colonel Lights Garbage 21.20.146 (-114, 1 Cockburn points)
Goal Kickers: J. Altschwager 2, C. Sulicich , T. Sinclair
Best Players: A. Clark, M. Lebbon, T. Sinclair, J. Altschwager, R. McCulloch, T. Bernard
8.2 to 0.0 within 15 minutes makes life a little tough. A friendlier schedule coming up so hopefully some better
results for the C-Men on the way. The ladies forfeit and subsequent 10 goal loss consigns the C-men to 1 cockburn
point.
Div 6R (The Video Show) 4.5.29 defeated by Colonel Lights Garbage 15.11.101 (-72, 2 Cockburn points)
Goal Kickers: S. Hobbs 2, L. Cameron , C. Reid
Best Players: S. Prebble, A. Hogg, L. Cameron, C. Reid, L. Mcdonald, J. Haddrick
Held on well until ¾ time against the top team. Good Bowlies turn out though!
Div 8 (The Chardonnays) 10.12.72 defeated Golden Grovel 5.1.31 (+41, 8 Cockburn points)
Goal Kickers: J. Richards 4, M. Heath , C. Lane , D. Jean , Z. Hambour , Z. Sheridan , L. Rogers
Best Players: Z. Hambour, J. Richards, J. Schiller, L. Rogers, S. Haskett, C. Lane
As far as Chardonnay wins go this one could be classified as “courageous”, which is not really the way the Chards
like to win games. Match report of the week this week, even if it was for Round 3.
Contempt or contemplative? Very Chardonnay.
Div 8R (The Scum) 13.8.86 defeated Golden Grovel 11.4.70 (+16, 7 Cockburn points)
Goal Kickers: A. Martinson 4, D. Tofan 3, M. Barker 3, N. Lawrence , A. Howard , R. O''Donnell
Best Players: A. Westbrook, M. Draca, M. Calabrese, S. Musolino, D. Tofan, A. Karas
A veteran line up for the Scum this week so it was no surprise that a last quarter fade-out ensued after leading by
42 at lemon time. You know you might be under some pressure down back when you’ve got Judas and Palsy
holding down the key position posts in the last quarter. All up a good win.
Div C1 (B*stards) 4.4.28 defeated by Ross n Trevor 13.17.95 (-67, 4 Cockburn points)
Goal Kickers: B. Neil 4
Best Players: B Neil
Bad day for the B*stards, supercoach dislocated his shoulder and couldn’t even get their results in.
Div Old Men (Greys) 15.20.110 defeated Fos Williams 8.8.56 (+54, 9 Cockburn points)
Goal Kickers: Clohesy 4, Esler 3, Venning, Gallagher 2, Vezis N, Vezis B, Place, Mcglashan 1
Womens Team (The Pinks) 0.0.0 defeated by Central Distic 10.0.60 (-60, 3 Cockburn point)
Best Players: I Neil
Goal Kickers: I Neil 1
The girls couldn’t quite get a team up this week, possibly due to the shock that ensued from their first Bowlies
appearance the previous night, but they did have a scratchy with the other team and a goal was kicked. I repeat A
GOAL WAS KICKED. Mark that date in the club history book (to be released), 4/5/2013. And even better the forfeit
only results in a 10 goal loss so they win 3 Cockburn points!
If you want to check all results and ladders click below.
http://www.sportingpulse.com/comp_info.cgi?c=1-114-0-0-0&a=FIXTURE&compID=241990
ADELAIDES LEADING TAXI DRIVER
Club legend Pete Abrey was the feature in the Tiser article on cabby drivers this week. You’ll be pleased to
know that the photo shoot went so well his calendar will be released next month. And for those that have
asked why there was no Bob Neil sign in the article Pete wants it known that he had one ready to go but the
journo was from SPOC and therefore refused to include it. Bloody spooners.
PLAYER SPONSORS (ALLOCATED NEXT WEEK!)
Andrew Lines
Andrew Wright
Anthony Dimarzo
Brian Austin
Craig Ball
Dave Taylor NSW
David Proudman NSW
Egils Olekalns
Gary Davis
Geoffrey Swincer X 3
Grant Miles
Jim Katsaros
Marcus Kampff VIC
Mark Pittman
Martin Altmann
Michael Dadds
Michael Eaton
Michael Reid
Neil Page
Nic Hambour
Nick Emmett
Paul Case
Peter Abrey
Peter Sharley
Phil Le Messurier
Rick Sarre
Ross Rohde
Sam Nickless NSW
Scott Bache NSW
Shaun Fowler
Stephen Ey
Stephen Parker
Stephen Parsons
Tim Horry QLD
Tom Burke
Tom Davies
BOB NEIL PHOTO OF THE WEEK
Wes slightly unimpressed by the quality of this photo (he sets high standards) but its a ripper anyway.
MATCH REPORT OF THE WEEK – CHARDONNAYS V RED LIGHT DISTRICT
Playing Saturday morning games can be fraught with danger. Hangovers of monumental proportions meet
the bleary eyes of parents up since the crack of dawn who are going to miss their mid-morning nap. There’s
always a chance that a hardworking somebody will sleep through their alarm and miss the start of the game
or the thorough warm-up. There’s the absolute monte that the opposition will turn up to your home ground
with an ungodly amount of time still to go before the siren cracks the crisp clean air of Adelaide’s Parklands.
They’ll stand around counting the Uni players believing that a forfeit is in the offing little realising that report
at 9.15 means report at 10.10.It also generally means that Uni players turn up to the quaint sight of District
footballers changing outside and running around doing drills while the Blacks players look on bemusedly and
regale each other with stories of yore, or last night.
Such was the scene when Port Red Light District turned up at Beautiful University Oval to complete the
Wayne King Nuptial Season Celebratory Match. The Cat’s Arse, as team Mr Responsible proven by his
exploits against Max Walkerville, had agreed to collect the coach in plenty of time so that the overly keen
District players could tread heavily and noisily all over Boz’s hallowed turf prior to chasing Blacks jumpers all
morning. 8.45 am came and went, as did 9, 9.15, 9.30, 9.35 and many a frantic phonecall to him, taxis and
other players. Katsy sheepishly turned up explaining he’d slept through a cacophony of noise; to top his day
off he apologised to some angry Red Lighters, had to buy the carton, broke his fibula in the first five minutes,
got a parking ticket and was told off by Boz for laying on the grass when injured. Trent turn her over went out
in sympathy and was last seen writhing on the boundary line after getting crudely ankletapped; it wasn’t
pain, it was just thirst as he explained later.
Needless to say, the Chardonnays weren’t at the peak of their game and footballing epiphany was quickly
followed by football that the Scum would be embarrassed by. The scarey killer went for a run, bounced the
ball, forgot to catch it, fell over and watched the ball bounce off his noggin, into the hands of a welcoming
Red Lighter and through the hey diddle diddle for twin calicos. The Bitch achieved minus dream team points
with the outstanding stats of no kicks, marks, handballs, tackles or frees for while getting pinged holding the
ball after kicking it thirty metres. The Red Lighters had decided that they’d load their forward line with six
foot wide and circumferenced players whose chief movement consisted of sticking the arse back and hands
forward; surprisingly effective until the ball hit the ground.
The Chardonnays gradually ground down the Red Lighters with freak goals and inexplicable misses to run
reasonably comfortable seven goal winners in front of a crowd including the entire Wayne King groom’s
wedding party, a rather anally incontinent A grader and a selection of strapping cigarette wielding lasses
bearing toddlers. Best players included the Homemaker, the hyphen Cam Lane, BJ, Schiller’s List, twopigs
Hambour while the real Sauce made a mockery of his Crows form to be best on ground. Goalkickers included
the Hyphenator with 4, the homemaker with 3 or as it was described to him, “one for mum, on for dad and
one for the country”, while Milky Richards and the real Baby Gags slotted 2 each.
Comfortable winners at Number One meant that we could concentrate on the main game; that of Kingy’s
wedding at Bob Neil Number 4 which saw a veritable who’s who of elder club statesmen emerge from the
woodwork and regale (some may say bore) each other with tales of how good they were and how the
youngsters have it easy nowadays. Ah, good times indeed.
A/B GRADE FIXTURES 2013
Round
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
Date
13/04/13
20/04/13
25/04/13
4/05/13
11/05/13
18/05/13
25/05/13
1/06/13
15/06/13
22/06/13
29/06/13
6/07/13
13/07/13
20/07/13
3/08/13
10/08/13
17/08/13
24/08/13
Opponent
Broadview
Goodwood Saints
PHOS Camden
Rostrevor OC
St Peters OC
Salisbury North
Gaza
Henley
Broadview
Tea Tree Gully
Goodwood Saints
PHOS Camden
Rostrevor OC
St Peters OC
Gaza
Henley
Tea Tree Gully
Salisbury North
Venue
University Oval
Goodwood Oval
University Oval
CampbelltownOval
University Oval
Salisbury North Oval
Klemzig Oval
University Oval
Broadview Oval
University Oval
University Oval
Camden Oval
University Oval
Caterer Oval
University Oval
Henley Memorial Oval
Petaringa Oval
University Oval