Newsletter - Brattleboro Area Hospice
Transcription
Newsletter - Brattleboro Area Hospice
Brattleboro Area Hospice Newsletter Fall 2014 191 Canal Street, Brattleboro, VT | 802-257-0775 | www.brattleborohospice.org “I choose to live until I die” HOSPICE CLIENT SPEAKS PUBLICLY ABOUT DY ING by Cindy Hutcheson, Hospice Volunteer “How do you deal with the fact that you could die any moment?” asks a hospice volunteer trainee. “Crying and anger came first,” Tammy says softly. “I had to make a conscious decision to either be scared and anxious until I die or live until I die. I chose to live.” It is unprecedented at Brattleboro Area Hospice for an individual in hospice care to speak so publicly about dying, but Tammy Sauve, a Hospice client who lives in Guilford, feels strongly about giving back to the community. Tammy spent time with her hospice volunteers of two years, Lori Daniels and Cindy Hutcheson, exploring how she could help others by talking about life with a terminal illness. Cindy Hutcheson, Lori Daniels & Tammy Sauve She initially considered speaking anonymously via phone at one of the hospice volunteer trainings. After much thought, she spoke with Patty Dunn, Hospice Program Coordinator, about wanting to share more openly. The two agreed she would attend a hospice training to present her story. Arrangements were made through Cheryl Richards, Hospice Education Coordinator, for Tammy to meet with trainees during the hospice volunteer training being held at Grace Cottage Hospital in Townshend. Tammy was ready to speak her thoughts on death and dying. Tammy is married with two adult children from her first marriage and four adult stepchildren with her second husband, Ed. She, Ed and their youngest son, Charlie, reside in Guilford. Meeting the new trainees in Townshend was a pleasure for Tammy. People were warm and welcoming, their questions personal and thought provoking. “What goes through your mind after the lights go out? You are lying in bed—what is running through your mind?” asks a hospice trainee. Tammy responds, looking down, “Will my husband wake up in the morning and find me dead?” “What is one thing you regret most about dying?” another volunteer asked. Through tears, Tammy uttered, “My children. They were three and eleven when they lost their father to cancer. And now they are faced with my death.” Tammy is very grounded in her faith. She and Ed are Jehovah’s Witnesses, and Tammy draws a great deal of strength from her religion. “I know I will be in Jehovah’s memory and resurrected here on earth. It will be in a restored paradise on earth with no sickness and death. I will be able to welcome back family and friends who have died.” She and hospice volunteer Cindy Hutcheson have had many conversations about religious beliefs. Tammy has said many times, “I am not afraid to die. I’m afraid of the process.” When given a diagnosis of a terminal illness, many people begin a “bucket list” of things to do. For Tammy, an avid craftsperson, this meant organizing her craft area, which then led to rearranging her home! With BAH volunteers Lori Daniels and Cindy Hutcheson, she was able to organize shelves, closets, and a large photo collection. After combing through boxes of newspaper articles, photos and memorabilia, Tammy sent each of her siblings and her children a box from this vast stockpile. In the process, Cindy learned that Tammy was a competitive roller skater and instructor when she lived in Washington State. She continued to skate after moving to Guilford, where she was involved in the Guilford sports program. Tammy also hosted roller skating parties for over 20 years at the Guilford School. continued on page 2 Brattleboro Area Hospice is a non-profit, community supported, United Way agency continued from page 1 Also on her list of final wishes was a wonderful trip last fall with her youngest son, Charlie. They traveled by train across the country to California to visit Charlie’s older brother, Roger. Their trip was made possible through The Dream Foundation, a program that honors the wishes of adults who have life-threatening illness. The family visited the San Diego Zoo, the Safari Animal Park, SeaWorld, Disneyland and Universal Studios. The trip was especially complex because Tammy, who requires supplemental oxygen most of the time, needed to travel with a wide range of medical equipment. Her son Charlie was a tremendous help to his mom. He did have trepidation about their journey, however. He was concerned about the possibility of her dying on their trip, even dying on the train. “I was nervous she might die, and what would I do? It was a scary thought knowing that it could happen,” Charlie said. Back at home again, Tammy enjoys her time with hospice volunteers Lori and Cindy. Having adult companionship has meant a great deal to her. Some visits might just be a chat over cool drinks or watching a movie. In getting to know Tammy, Lori uncovered that she had never had s’mores. Lori said she couldn’t believe that Tammy was 53 and never had the fireside snack. Soon after that, equipped with sterno, Hershey’s bars, graham crackers and marshmallows, Lori was able to give Tammy the summertime favorite in the comfort of her own living room. One of the participants in the training at Grace Cottage wrote on the exit interview feedback form: “The session that we spent w/ Tammy (hospice client) was more valuable than any reading, sharing, video, or any learning tool we Tammy & husband Ed make s’mores for the first time could ever use. Her openness, honesty, her reality made everything sink in and helped me to believe ‘I can do this—I can be there & be real for people like Tammy.’ ” Tammy’s generosity in sharing her experience has clearly fulfilled another of her wishes—to give back to her community. Hospice has so much more to offer, and volunteers are a big part of our organization. To learn more please visit our website at www.brattleborohospice.org. To listen to Tammy speak about her experience, visit our webpage and click on the top right YouTube button. 12th Annual Day of the Dead Celebration Friday November 7th, 5–7 pm NEW Location: Latchis 4 Gallery Music, children’s art project and placing mementos on a community altar ANNUAL AUCT ION COMING RIGHT UP! Following on our recent successful fundraisers in the last years, Brattleboro Area Hospice is once again hosting an auction. The Cherished Goods Auction will be a little earlier this year: on Saturday, October 25th at the VFW on Black Mountain Road in north Brattleboro. Much like last year’s amazing and eclectic items, this year’s auction will once again feature many pieces of furniture, works of art, jewelry and other ephemera, all of which will be available for auction just in time for holiday gifts! The live auction with well-known auctioneer Kit Martin will feature such interesting items as a handsome hand-carved antique piano stool with back; an antique hand-painted fan in original box from Casa de Diego, Puerta del Sol, Madrid; a lovely 1930’s dining room sideboard, plus many other high quality pieces of antique and good-condition furniture, jewelry, paintings, china, glassware, and decorative items. In addition, an exciting African photographic safari will be available for bid in the live auction. There will be ample time to bid on the many silent auction offerings throughout the evening. It boasts a host of interesting items, gifts, get-aways, and services donated by local businesses and supporters. Some specific items include ski passes and catered dinners, along with many generous donations of items from area businesses and community members. The silent auction articles range in value, so there is something for every budget. Many other unique offerings are still being acquired and will serve to make this auction a not-to-miss event! For an up-to-date list of items, go to the Hospice website at www. brattleborohospice.org where you can also find photographs of some of the interesting items up for bid. This is a chance to get an early start on holiday shopping! The event starts at 5:00 with hors d’oeuvres and cocktails (cash bar) and a preview of items featured in the live auction. During this time and throughout the evening, guests are encouraged to bid on the many compelling items in the silent auction, and to bid them up to help support the Hospice services. We hope as BAH newsletter readers you will consider coming out that evening to help make it a success! The Cherished Goods Auction lists as its Platinum sponsor Brattleboro Savings & Loan; with other major sponsors including Brattleboro Memorial Hospital, Brattleboro Retreat, Dartmouth-Hitchcock Medical Center, Entergy Vermont Yankee, Family Legacy Partners, New Chapter, Inc., and The Bunbury Company / Windham Foundation. (Silver). Bronze sponsors are Bast Investment Company, Bayada Hospice, Brattleboro Ford Subaru, Brattleboro Pharmacy, Brown and Roberts Ace Hardware, Edward Jones Investments, Eternal Blessings Cremation Service, LLC, Green River Data Analysis, LLC, Holton Home, Inc., Ker-Westerlund & Fleming Funeral Home, Little House Rug Hooking & Braiding, Lynn C. Rust CPA, PC, Park Place Financial Advisors, People’s United Bank, River Valley Credit Union, The Hotel Pharmacy, Wells Fargo Advisors, Gordon and Jean Bristol, Ann Fielder and Tom Yahn, and Robin Stern and Potter Stewart Jr. Items needed for Upcoming Auction Hospice is once again sponsoring the Cherished Goods Auction, this year on Saturday, October 25th at the VFW. We are looking for donations of interesting and/or antique furnishings, particularly good furniture to be auctioned off by Kit. So we ask that you scour your attic, basement, garage and dresser drawers for high quality, good condition jewelry, paintings, china, glassware, decorative items and, particularly, furniture. To donate an item, call Greg Moschetti at 254-8714 for donation pick-up, or you can drop off smaller items at the Hospice office located at 191 Canal Street in Brattleboro. Please do not drop items at the Hospice Experienced Goods Thrift Shop on Flat Street. Staying Connected—With Hu mble Appreciation by Andrea Livermore, Development Director Hospice has so many friends and supporters, many of you long-term allegiant friends. You’ve come to us through a wide variety of venues; as clients, friends or family of clients, as volunteers. Some of you had one interaction with us and have stayed by us since. Others of you have been involved with us in multiple ways over time, your commitment renewed with every exchange. We are humbled by your allegiance, your openness to life and your willingness to give. Death is a difficult topic; one that we tend to avoid. You, our friends and supporters are open to the reality that end of life will come for all of us. And in keeping, you not only have helped us by personally seeing our mission through but you have supported us financially and acted as ambassadors to the community. As we entered into 2014, BAH vowed to move out into the community in an expanded way, engaging people young and old in conversations and activities that move them to think about and plan proactively for the later chapters of their lives. Research has shown that the more people are willing to explore their feelings about end of life, the better they are able to deal with these challenges when the time comes. With our upcoming 35th Anniversary Celebration, “Love Lives On”, the opportunity to consider death, dying and grief through a variety of creative forms will be presented. First we sincerely hope that you will attend one or all of our events. We believe there is something for every taste and we are confident that the quality and variety of offerings will not be a disappointment. And next we encourage you to bring along a friend, perhaps someone less familiar or comfortable with the topic of end of life. Offer them the opportunity to ponder the issues, engage in conversation and get to know Brattleboro Area Hospice. There is always room for new friends at our table. Fall Childrens’ Bereavement Activities A Good Grief Group, an expressive arts program for children who have experienced the death of a family member or friend, will begin October 2 on Thursdays, for 6 weeks, 4:00–5:15 pm. In this program, we will use a range of activities— drawing, sculpture, collage, photography, writing, movement and music—to explore feelings, share memories, and design and create mementos. Good Grief is designed for children of all ages. Contact Elizabeth Ungerleider, 258-0763 or [email protected] to learn more. A Book Making Workshop for Teens, on Saturday, November 15, 10:00 am–3:00 pm. This workshop will provide participants the opportunity to find creative ways to understand, express and transform grief, and to meet others who have also experienced a loss. We’ll provide a safe and supportive environment for each person to create a personal, handmade book about his or her own experiences, using words, old and new photographs, collage and other art materials. No previous art experience necessary. Lunch will be provided. Contact Elizabeth Ungerleider, 258-0763 or [email protected] to learn more. Love Lives On A Celebration of our 35th Anniversary – All Activities Open to the Public To celebrate our 35th anniversary this November we are offering our community ways to explore life & death and to remember those we love through a variety of art events using music, film, theater and visual art. We invite you join us on the journey, remembering that despite our losses, Love Lives On. • SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 3:00 pm, GUILFORD COMMUNITY CHURCH Rest in Peace, a concert for All Souls Day in collaboration with the Friends of Music at Guilford. • FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 7, 5:00 pm, LATCHIS 4 GALLERY, 50 MAIN ST Art Exhibit & Dia de los Muertos Altar. In collaboration with River Gallery School of Art, Brattleboro Area Hospice held a series of workshops in September for clients and volunteers. Art of the participants will be shown in the Gallery, along with a special Day of the Dead Community Altar. The exhibit and altar will remain until November 24th. • DATE TBA, LATCHIS THEATER, AS PART OF THE BRATTLEBORO FILM FESTIVAL, 10/3–11/9 Alive Inside, a film shown in collaboration with the Brattleboro Film Festival. This stirring documentary follows social worker Dan Cohen, founder of the nonprofit organization Music & Memory, as he fights against a broken healthcare system to demonstrate music’s ability to combat memory loss and restore a deep sense of self to those suffering from it. • SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 15, 7:00 pm, RIVER GARDEN Vesta: Staged reading followed by dessert & discussion. Directed by Burt Tepfer, the play Vesta combines drama and humor to explore the end of life of a grandmother. Written by Bryan Harnetiaux, the play examines illness and family at this poignant time. Following the play, there will be cake and coffee, with an opportunity to discuss the play with the cast, director and fellow attendees. “Rest in Peace” A Concert Sunday, November 2, 3: 00 pm at Guilford Community In honor of All Souls Day, November 2, Friends of Music at Guilford and Brattleboro Area Hospice—celebrating its 35th Anniversary in November—are collaborating on an afternoon concert fittingly titled “Rest in Peace.” Beginning at 3:00 p.m. in Guilford Community Church, the program include two song series and a number of instrumental interludes. Eight songs in a variety of styles will be included from ten composed earlier this year for “Rest in Peace: The Gravestone Epitaph Project” by Tom Baehr, a Putney resident. The texts, some rather entertaining, are from New England graveyards. In addition to his composing skills, Tom is also a multi-instrumentalist, sings in several regional choral groups, and has been conducting the Guilford Chamber Singers since 2012. The second collection of six songs comprises “An Untimely Frost: Songs from the Old Antrim Center Cemetery.” These quite poignant pieces, set in West Gallery style to suit the era of their texts, are by Haverhill, Massachusetts composer Bruce Randall, another multi-instrumentalist and singer who has performed in past Friends of Music holiday programs. The songs will be performed by a group of regional voices gathered especially for this concert, as well as both composers. Musical interludes to suit the theme will be performed by an ensemble of Guilford Chamber Players, including Amy Cann, Jenny Holan and Linda Hecker, among others. A bountiful teatime reception follows the performance. Admission is $10 per person at the door. ADVANCED DIRECT IVE CONVERSAT ION - PART 1 Monday, September 29 • 6:00–8:00 pm Presented by: Joanna Rueter, Sustainable Aging, LLC Location: BMH Brew Barry Conference Room Modern medical advances often complicate end-of-life decisions. Learn how an advance care directive can help you and your loved ones in a medical crisis. Understand the key elements you need to have documented. Whether you’re contemplating Advance Care Planning for yourself or for an aging loved one, this workshop will teach you what you need to know to get started. For more information or to register please call 802-257-0775 or email [email protected] ADVANCE CARE PLANNING — DIGGING INTO THE DETAILS — PART 2 Monday, November 17 • 6:00–8:00 pm Presented by: Joanna Rueter, Sustainable Aging, LLC Location: BMH Brew Barry Conference Room In a medical crisis, the decisions confronting you can be overwhelming. Learn ahead of time what the possibilities are. Get familiar with the range of terms, (e.g. Proxy, COLST, Code Status, Quality of Life, Heroic Measures, Palliative Care) and their consequences. This workshop will help you understand your choices and align them with your values and wishes; learn how to discuss and record them. For more information or to register, please call 802-257-0775 or email [email protected] DEATH AND DY ING F OR BEGINNERS CLASS Tuesday evenings, Sept. 16th thru Oct. 7, 6–8:30 pm Parks Place Community Resource Center in Bellows Falls This free class will provide opportunities for individuals to explore awareness, attitudes and feelings about death and dying. Participants will learn how to provide emotional and practical support to individuals and families who are facing or grieving a death. Class size is limited and a pre-course conversation with one of the leaders is required. To register or for more information about the Death and Dying for Beginners class, please call Patty Dunn, Hospice Program Coordinator at 802257-0775 ext. 102, or Ryan Murphy at 802-257-0775 ext. 105. Registration deadline is Sept 9, 2014. A Terribly Important Volunteer Tea Party Thursday September 18th from 5–6:30 pm At The Gathering Place, 30 Terrace Street Brattleboro Significant others and Children Welcome please RSVP by Wednesday September 10th 802-257-0773 Like Us on Facebook! Whether we’re sharing information, recruiting volunteers, announcing a special event or offering an article, we need your help to spread the word! “Like Us” on Face book and “Share” our posts. The more people know and understand, the more they can benefit from hospice and help others to benefit as well. Brattleboro Area Hospice 191 Canal Street Brattleboro, VT 05301 Brattleboro Area Hospice Board of Directors Jean Bristol Ann Fielder, President Gloria Klein, Secretary Theresa Masiello, Treasurer David Miner Cynthia Nims Bobbe Ragouzeos, Vice President Eaddy Sutton Hospice Office Connie Baxter, Bereavement Care Coordinator Joyce Drew, Office Manager Patty Dunn, Hospice Program Coordinator Andrea Livermore, Development Director Ryan Murphy, Hospice Care Coordinator Susan Parris, Executive Director Cheryl Richards, Hospice Care Coordinator & Bereavement Care Counselor Experienced Goods Thrift Shop Karen Zamojski, Store Manager Ellen Graham, Assistant Store Manager Eric Cutler, Volunteer Coordinator Christopher John, Clothing Manager Gemma Champoli, Special Projects Manager Jennie Reichman, Store Assistant U.S. Postage Paid Non-Profit Org. BRATTLEBORO, VT 05301 PERMIT NO. 109 Calendar September 10 & 24; October 8 & 22; November 12, Wednesdays, 5:00–6:30 pm Spouse/Partner Loss Support Group, facilitated by Cheryl Richards September 11 to October 16, Thursdays, 4:30–6 pm, Bereavement Support Group, facilitated by Connie Baxter. September 15, October 20, November 17, Mondays, 5:30 pm. Board of Directors Meetings. September 16th thru October 7, Tuesdays, 6:00–8:30 pm, Death And Dying For Beginners Class, Parks Place Community Resource Center in Bellows Falls. Facilitated by Patty Dunn & Ryan Murphy. Contact the office at 257-0775 ext. 102 or 106 to learn more. September 17, Wednesday, 5:00–6:30 pm. Volunteer Appreciation Party—this year an Alice in Wonderland themed “Very Important Tea Party”! At the Gathering Place, Brattleboro. September 29 and November 17, 6:00–8:00 pm, Mondays. Advanced Directives Workshops I & II at Brew Barry Conference Room, BMH, call 257-0775 to register. October 2 to November 2, Thursdays,4:00–5:15 pm. Good Grief Group, an expressive arts program for children. Contact Elizabeth Ungerleider, 258-0763 or [email protected] to learn more. October 25, Saturday, 5:00 pm 3rd Annual Cherished Goods Auction to support Brattleboro Area Hospice at the VFW, Black Mountain Road, Brattleboro. November 2, Sunday, 3:00 pm. Rest in Peace, An All Souls Day Concert in collaboration with Friends of Music Guilford, All Souls Church, West Brattleboro. November 7, Friday, Dia de los Muertos Altar & Art Opening, Latchis 4 Theater, Main Street during Gallery Walk. November 15, Saturday, 7:00 pm. Vesta, A staged reading. Directed by Burt Tepfer. The River Garden, downtown Brattleboro. Bereaved Parents Support Group, for parents who have lost a teenaged or young adult child, began in August. Please contact Cheryl Richards at 257-0775 ext. 108 if you’re interested in joining a future bereaved parents group. Individual and family support is also available with trained bereavement volunteer and staff. Please call Connie Baxter for more information, an appointment, or just a listening ear.