Pop-up wedding - the Herb Garden

It’s been two years since my man popped the
question and put a ring on my finger. We are both
divorced; we live together as
a blended family with our teenage kids from our previous
Pop-up wedding: the impromptu
marriages. Our busy lives are
intertwined and our finances
wedding; a quick, no-fuss
are a serious concern: kids
alternative to the traditional,
have to go to college, debt
has
to be managed, we have
elaborate wedding...
to retire someday. We want
to be married and we want
to have a ceremony with family
members to celebrate our union….but we each did
the big white wedding thing a decade ago and the
thought of doing it again feels…extravagant? The
planning, the money, the organization…did I mention the money?
We got a little card in the mail a few weeks ago from
some friends of ours who were in a similar situation:
mature, settled, engaged… The card announced that
they had eloped, and it asked that their friends and
family congratulate them and wish them well on their
honeymoon…(!!!)
Is there not a middle ground here between the thirtythousand-dollar/two-hundred guest wedding…and
elopement?
There is:
it’s called the “pop-up wedding”
and Gerry and George of
The Herb Garden
have made an art of it.
Gerry and his wife George bought the Herb Garden
10 years ago when they visited the spot and fell in
love with it. “There’s a magic here,” says Gerry, and he’s
right; I feel it too. I drove up the long drive on a warm
spring day in April and recalled my first impression of
the place almost exactly a year before when I made
up my mind to be married there. There are two hewnlog barns, a farmhouse, a gazebo and even a tree with
a lovers’ bench (a branch that has bent down low to
the ground and makes a quaint perch for a photo-op).
It is the perfect country location for a wedding.
I had explained to George and Gerry at the time that
we loved their venue and thought it was perfect in
every way, but that we were struggling with the idea
of putting thousands of dollars into a wedding at this
stage in our lives. We were actually considering, I had
confided, having a courthouse wedding—which is to
say, no wedding at all, to my mind. “We just want to
be married,” I explained. “But we’ll have to save for
continued.....
years before we can afford a traditional wedding, and
even then, can I really justify that kind of expense when
my daughter needs tuition?”
That’s when Gerry told me about the pop-up wedding.
“We wanted to offer something that would be a step up
from the civil marriage ceremony at City Hall, but still
casual, low-key, inexpensive and easy.” When you get married at the City or Town Hall, he went on to tell me, there’s
only so many people you can have attend; it’s cold and
business-like, and over in a few minutes. Then there’s the
Las Vegas elopement which has always been an option if
you want a low-fuss wedding, but there’s a clandestine,
renegade air about that idea, and it’s not cheap either.
The Pop-up Wedding is held on a weekday or evening
with 12 or so key guests. Drinks and h’ordeuvres are
served, and cake—of course. The ceremony takes place
in a setting brimming with majestic beauty…and then everyone goes home. No need for a caterer, a DJ, two-hundred place settings, A thousand dollars’ worth of flowers.
You can skip the open bar, the bridesmaid’s dresses and
the groom’s cake— everything is optional. It is a reasonable alternative; a truly toned-down wedding for those
couples who want a memorable event, but don’t want to
pay for it with a second mortgage.
”Something like 900 couples got married by the Justiceof-the-Peace in Ottawa last year” says Gerry. “They could
have had a pop-up wedding here and I bet they’d have
sweeter memories—and nicer photos.”
I looked over a portfolio of pictures from one of The Herb
Garden’s recent summer weddings and nodded in agreement.
“And then there’s couples like us”, I added, “content to stay
engaged indefinitely, never ready to commit the energy
and money to an elaborate wedding.”
For $500 a pop-up wedding is so affordable even in my
stingiest moments I can’t argue with it. Now, the thought
of planning my wedding is exciting and inspiring—
rather than stressful. I’m looking forward to making my
invitations, buying a simple summer dress and offering
a graceful, low-key evening event to our closest friends
and relatives. The stress of coordinating a reception, dinner, music, crowds of people, weather contingency plans
and all the myriad items that have to be dealt with when
you’re putting on a traditional wedding—I will have none
of it.
At the end of the day, it’s a celebration of two people
committing to one another and celebrating love, and I
don’t want that to be lost in the details and logistics. I
want to enjoy the moment and share it with my loved
ones. And that’s all I want.
continued.....
I conclude my interview and I gather my
things…but I just don’t want to leave. The
sun is setting; it is one of the first really warm
days of the spring and I can smell the herbs.
The only sounds are the trickling of melting snow and songs of birds. That magical
element Gerry mentioned is no exaggeration. George presents me with a little potted
Cuban Oregano in a miniature painted pail;
a keepsake for my visit. She tells me to pinch
the top buds to encourage growth and to
brush the leaves to make the smell infuse
the air. The minty-musky smell fills my car
as I drive home, my imagination filled with
thoughts of my wedding plans; I am composing my vows and designing my dress in my
head. I realize I am thrilled with the prospect
of getting married. I am looking forward to it
with a light heart.
So I’m sold on the Pop-up wedding, hands
down, but I know it’s not for everyone. I have
nothing against the lavish traditional wedding per sé; I’m just an old frugal gal with
almost-grown kids and two mortgages. I’m
glad The Herb Garden offers an alternative to
the traditional wedding, but that’s not to say
it can’t accommodate one—and more. Gerry
and George have hosted up to 300 people
and inclement weather is not an issue at
the Herb Garden, with two renovated barns
sturdy enough to handle the most rambunctious of Macarena performances. Check out
their website for information and pictures
or, better yet, drive out and visit The Herb
Garden for yourself. You’ll see: it really is a
magical place.
I won’t have to call my 42-year-old partner
my “boyfriend” for the next ten years; I’ll be
calling him my husband soon. We’ve booked
our mid-summer night’s dream pop-up wedding and it promises to be as mellow and
informal, yet meaningful and memorable, as
I could ever hope for. If you’re like me and my
man, the ‘perpetually engaged’, or thinking
about tying the knot before a judge, consider
a Pop-up Wedding at The Herb Garden.
www.herbgarden.on.ca
The Herb
Garden