Guide to Dating and Dating Agencies 201

Guide to Dating and Dating Agencies
201
Foreword
by
Heather Heber-Percy
Chair of the ABIA
roduction Agencies.
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Choosing your agency
You’ll find this guide to ABIA member agencies laid out alphabetically.
But you’ll quickly notice that they all offer services that are different and some may suit you better than others. Please
note that some of these services - such as bespoke memberships or singles events - are not covered by the ABIA
Code of Practice.
Some ABIA members are online agencies, which have all the Internet virtues of accessibility and convenience.
But the bulk of ABIA members are traditional (off-line) agencies, whose strengths lie in the face-to-face contact and
the degree of personal service intrinsic in that model.
As well as service, location is also important in your choice of offline agency, since the membership base of each will
be concentrated in the area(s) they specifically target.
As with any directory, circumstances change and it’s advisable to check the ABIA website - www.abia.org.uk - or,
preferably, with agencies themselves, for their current details, terms, conditions and services before signing up.
Key
Location
The location address is the (head) office of the agency. Agency membership will often be distributed across a wide area.
Prices
Prices are shown including vat (unless otherwise indicated) but are subject to change and you should always check with the
agency directly.
Telephone
Although phone numbers are provided for online agencies, they are not normally equipped to deal with general enquiries by
phone; please make contact via their websites.
ABIA-registered Dating Agencies as at May 2013
Across the Room
African Caribbean Partners
Doves Barn Stowmarket Road Badley Suffolk IP9 8RJ
Tel: 01449 722800 / 700 / 333
83 South Road Southall Middlesex UB1 1SQ Tel: 0208 574
3990
www.acrosstheroom.co.uk
www.africancaribbeanpartners.co.uk
Across the Room is a specialist Introduction Agency offering
an exclusive, discreet service to find perfect partners and
soul mates for our discerning and selective members. We
provide the opportunity to find friendship, love and romance
with carefully selected members matched for compatibility.
We have cultivated a careful, step by step approach to
understanding you and an in-depth insight into finding a
partner who is visually appealing and mentally stimulating.
Confidential and successful, this personal service is perfect
Personal introduction service, providing one-to-one
introduction meetings or personal contact information for
direct contact. Unlimited introductions. Professional and nonprofessional African and Caribbean to African and
Caribbean and African and Caribbean to non-African and
non-Caribbean. African Caribbean Partners is the trading
Name for Cupid (Worldwide) Limited
...
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions,
Computer Comparison,
Headhunting Services, Events
1991
Essex, Herts, Cambs, Norfolk,
Suffolk and London
28 - 70
Silver £175.00; Gold Star from
£425.00
1 year
2006
Image advice, Personal
assistant at events if requested
No
Affinity London
3rd Floor 207 Regent Street London W1B 3HH
Telephone: 020 8832 9030
www.affinitylondon.co.uk
Affinity was founded in 1999 to provide a select introduction
service for professional, executive, creative and business
people throughout the South of England. Since then we have
created over 20,000 matches resulting in countless
permanent relationships and many marriages.
We work with our clients in complete confidentiality to
provide a personal matching service tailored to your
requirements. We offer three levels of service, ranging from
our Standard matching with our own members, through
...
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions,
Headhunting Services, Events
1999
London and South East,
Europe (Focus only)
40-99
Standard: £790, Premium:
£950, Focus: £1,450
Standard: 1 Year, Premium &
Focus 2 Years (all with on hold
facilities)
2012
Specialist Portrait and Studio
Photography
No
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions
2010
UK
18 - 70
£50 Joining Fee - £295 Annual
Membership Fee (Pearl
Service) - £495 Annual
Membership Fee (Diamond
Service) - no further costs.
12 months or minimum six
introductions (whichever lasts
longer)
2010
No
Attractive Professionals
MWB Business Exchange 4 Redheughs Rigg Edinburgh
EH12 9DQ
Telephone: Edinburgh: 0131 338 6112 London: 0207 183
7037 Midlands: 0121 285 2727 Leeds: 0113 320 1113
www.attractiveprofessionals.co.uk
Attractive Professionals is a nationwide introduction service
for sincere, single professional people seeking a partner,
with its Head Office in Edinburgh. We also have offices in
London, Birmingham and Leeds. Our clients are all
professionals or in business, are located throughout the UK
and are aged between 30 and mid 70s.
Our Service
Having been involved in UK dating since 1979, we were
aware that some single people wanted a little more than a
...
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions
2003
UK
30 - mid 70s
£2,450
12 months (continued for a
further 12 months free of
charge if required)
2011
None
No
Berkeley International
23 Berkeley Square London W1J 6HE
Tel: +44 (0)207 665 6651
www.berkeley-international.com
Berkeley International is well-established and highly
regarded company offering an exclusive matchmaking
service to successful, professional people.
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions,
Headhunting Services
1998
UK/Worldwide
20 - 80
From £9,600 inc vat
12 months
2008
Relationship Psychology and
Image consultancy available
No
Caroline Crowther
Tamarisk House Round Oak Road Cheddar Somerset BS27
3BN
Tel: 01934 744788 or 01934 712900
www.carolinecrowther.com
Business and Professional People
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions, The
'Lists' Method, Headhunting
Services
1995
West Midlands, Cotswolds and
the West Country
45+
(1) Rendezvous Listing £100,
(2) Rendezvous Personal £395,
(3) Principal £675, (4)
Executive £875, (5)
Ambassador from £2500 One
year (Head hunting service - all
UK)
Flexible as necessary
2001
No
ChristianConnection.co.uk
T: 020 7831 8714
www.christianconnection.co.uk
Christian Connection is a Christian dating site owned and
run by Christians and has been since its launch in
September 2000. It is the largest UK based Christian dating
site. Members create profiles, search for other members and
then contact each other via the website. There are plenty of
features to make the experience accessible and fun.
Thousands of couples have met through the site and others
have found friendship and community through our events,
meetups and message boards. At Christian Connection,
...
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
Online Dating
2000
UK and Ireland
18-99
Free trial followed by full
membership options of: 1
month £19.99 3 months
£35.99 1 year £79.99
1 month, 3 months or 12
months
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
2012
Christian Connection also runs
regular events through their
events website
No
Classical Partners Online
34 Tudor Rd Wheathampstead Herts AL4 8NW
Tel: 07814812591
www.classicalpartnersonline.co.uk
Internet dating and friendship agency specialising in people
with a love of music and the Arts. Basic free membership
includes comprehensive profile, member search and limited
availability to contact other members through a message
service. Full membership gives members access to
advanced features and unlimited messaging.
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
Online Dating
2011
UK and Ireland
18 - 99
Free membership option and
upgrades available for an
additional charge. 1 month £14.94, 3 months - £29.94, 12
months - £69.94
1 month - 12 months
2012
Online Dating
Yes
County Register
Grove Park Studios 188- 192 Sutton Court Road London W4
3HR
Tel: +44 (0)20 8994 8222
www.thecountyregister.com
Specialist Headhunting Service (£10,000 or £6,000)- Employ
your own personal search agent to find a partner. The
County Register is for people who wish to remain
anonymous, who would not join a conventional introduction
agency and who would prefer to employ a personal head
hunter. Run by Heather Heber-Percy and her team, it is a
worldwide service with members accepted from the age of
30 - 80. The Portfolio Connection Service (£2,000) - Our
Portfolio is made up of people from a broad, professional
...
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions,
Headhunting Services
1994
UK & Worldwide
30 - 80
3 levels - £2,000, £6,000 and
£10,000. No further costs.
15 months or 18 months plus
freeze facility
1994
No
Drawing Down the Moon
46 Manchester Street London W1U 7LS
Tel: 0207 224 1001
What do your clothes say about you?
The Art Of Grooming by Sue Donnelly
Anyone who owns a horse or a long haired cat or dog will understand the importance of grooming. A
well-kept, glossy coat and clean claws can completely transform an animal from a straggly, unkempt
one.
Most of us realise, at some level, that we need to look presentable when meeting other people.
The essentials including a daily shower, washing hair, brushing, wearing clean, pressed clothes are
mandatory, so I won’t waste time mentioning them. Instead, I will cover some of the basics that you
might have overlooked.
Gentlemen
Dirty fingernails will not make up for a designer outfit.
Facial hair, such as a full beard, can be a bit of a ‘turn off’ for some women, so keep it trimmed and
neat if you want to sport one.
Nose hairs – I’ve lost count of the times I’ve been riveted to a man’s nose rather than to what he is saying. Please, guys, check
in a mirror every day and remove any strays. This also applies to bushy hair growth in the ears and in the eyebrows. Note – it
is also very ageing!
Don’t over-do the aftershave. It can overpower rather than seduce.
Keep jewellery to a minimum. A watch and perhaps a ring. Earrings in men don’t look great, neither do chunky bracelets or
lots of metal chains around the neck.
Ladies
Dirty fingernails will not make up for a designer outfit. The trend these days is to have finger nails that look natural. So keep
the vampy red for your toes and select a french polish instead.
Makeup – some of you will prefer a natural, no makeup look and this is fine for some occasions. A more formal occasion,
such as a black tie dinner, requires you to look as if you’ve made an effort. Makeup is crucial, even if it’s kept to a minimum.
Conversely, too much makeup is an instant turn off for men, so if it looks like you can scrape it off, utilise the ‘less is more’
approach.
Lipstick on your teeth. A common occurrence when you’re trying hard to look smart. To prevent this happening, blot
lipstick with a tissue and then reapply a top coat. If you’re still unsure, try this as a way to remove any excess – insert your
index finger into your mouth. Close your lips around it as if you were drinking with a straw. Keeping your lips in the same
position, slowly withdraw your finger. All excess will be on your finger and not on your lips.
Don’t over-do the perfume. It can overpower rather than seduce.
Hair – does your hair look like it’s been cared for or are you a wash’n’go type of gal. Is the style appropriate for the occasion?
Does it flatter your face? Are your roots showing? Men like to think they can run their fingers through your hair, so get rid
of old split ends and have it professionally cared for.
Don’t over-do your cleavage. Mystery is more enticing than your entire bustline on show.
Shoes. Flat shoes aren’t great as an enticement tool. Think heels and let your legs look amazing. Pick a small heel if you’re
not used to walking in them.
Keep jewellery balanced. Long, dangly earrings should make a statement so you don’t need the matching necklace and
bracelet as well. In fact, if you have a matching ‘set’, never wear them all together. It cheapens them.
Shoes and handbags should never match exactly. Pick up colour combinations but don’t buy a ‘set’ as it’s very dated.
Both
Is your outfit past its sell by date? Shiny or bobbled material or scruffy shoes scream ‘not bothered’.
Are you up to date? This does not necessarily mean trendy, but outdated clothes create an image that the wearer is not keeping
up with current thinking. This applies to spectacles too.
Do you smoke? If so, make sure you take mints and clean your teeth properly. There’s nothing worse than bad breath.
Lastly, check for ‘polish’. Are your shoes clean? Any loose buttons or threads? Do you feel restricted or comfortable? Do
your clothes suit you? Are they appropriate?
Tick all the boxes? Then go and enjoy yourself.
Sue Donnelly is a style and image consultant who provides one-to-one coaching
and workshops for individuals and groups - and is retained image coach for
RSVP. She is a respected and prolific author on the subject and President of
The Federation of Image Consultants.Visit www.accentuate.me.uk.
www.drawingdownthemoon.co.uk
Guaranteed minimum amount of introductions . Known as an
agency for "thinking people". We are an original, one-to-one,
personal introduction service (founded 1984), popular with
lively people from the professional, business, academic,
media and creative worlds. All members interviewed.
Personal headhunting. No-obligation consultation. A well
established agency with a history of "happy endings".
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions
1984
London and South East
England
25 - 65
Option A Personal Matchmaker
£6000-£15000; Option B
£3750; Option C & C+ £1950;
Classic £1500; Associate £1200
12 months to 24 months; one
year of 'on hold' time.
1989
No
Executive Club of St James's
2nd Floor Portland House Bressenden Place London SW1E
5RS
Tel: 020 7930 5555
www.thematchmaker.co.uk
FreeDating.co.uk
See website
www.freedating.co.uk
Completely free UK online dating site.
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Online Dating
2005
UK
18 and over
FREE
Unlimited
2012
Yes
Gray & Farrar International
53 Davies Street Mayfair London W1K 5JH
Tel: +44 (0)20 7290 9585
www.grayandfarrar.com
Totally discreet and personal luxury matchmaking service,
working only for the most exceptional single people.
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Personal Introductions
2005
Worldwide
18 - 99
From GBP 10,000 (plus VAT
where applicable)
12 months
2006
No
For younger professionals - ladies aged 24 to 44 men to 59.
All dating members are given a 3 hour interview free of
charge. There is no pressure to join, or you may change
your mind for three days after joining without cost. Members
are allocated a personal advisor who recommends the best
people for you and then seeks the approval of the other
party to meet you. VIP members have a personal advisor
who will travel to their home or offices maintaining a very
personal service bringing details of selected members. We
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
...
Ivory Towers is an online dating site offering intelligent
dating for University graduates in the UK and Ireland.
Members create a profile which includes a reference to their
University background and can search for and message
each other through the site.
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions,
Headhunting Services, Events
1985
UK however 80% of
membership live in London or
within 20 miles of the M25
other members reside
throughout the UK and abroad
but agree the first two meetings
shall be in Central London.
25 - 59 (ladies max 43)
£220 - £465, £850, £1695
£1995, £3795, £8500, £10,000
or Social only membership at
£135.
Llifetime but subject to a
monthly service fee to keep
your membership active. You
may rejoin or extend your
active membership indefinitely
by payment of a monthly
service fee (£15 £25 £30 £60,
£90 or £135)
1999
Training: flirting, relationships,
make up, presentation etc
No
IvoryTowers.net
T: 020 7831 8714
www.ivorytowers.net
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Online Dating
2001
UK and Ireland
18 - 99 (majority of members ar
Free trial followed by full
membership options of: 1
month £24 3 months £48 12
months £96
1 month, 3 months or 12
months
2012
No
Just Woodland Friends
Upper Cross Cottage Dinedor Hereford HR2 6PF
Tel: 0845 370 8180
www.justwoodlandfriends.com
Catering for farming, country sporting, horse and animal
loving people. Members may receive their lists by post or
email and can join online.
Dating Safely
The Essential Guide for Men and Women by Jacqui Hames
In the 18th century, the world of romance was so different – women held the balance of power. If a man wanted to woo the lady of
his dreams, he had to visit her house, listen to her play the piano (no matter how excruciating), watch her do needlework, and read
to her – all under the watchful eye of a chaperone. The woman would then decide if she wanted him to visit again, and she could
choose who could take her to balls and dinners, based on his eligibility and prospects intensely examined by her parents. Obviously
if a man didn’t want to visit her or take her out she was a bit stuck, but if she was a reasonably attractive proposition, physically or
financially, then she was in the driving seat.
Courting progressed to dating as, by the early 20th Century, women started to experience life outside the home. They wanted their
wooing to take place in private, away from the prying eye of a watchful parent. The balance of power began to shift as men took
control in the relationship by paying for the dinners and theatre tickets, and social protocols and strict moral frameworks within
society dictated how a relationship should be conducted.
Gradually with a society less prepared to be prying and judgemental about the details of a private relationship (unless you’re a
celebrity of course), we have become reliant on our basic instincts and intuition to judge how suitable a person is to become a
partner for life. Along with a few helpful pieces of advice from friends and family.
Unfortunately these new found freedoms have come at a cost, and not just the risk of a broken heart. People
looking for love are often too prepared to open up and trust someone they’ve just met, or even spoken to
only briefly, for fear of jeopardising the potential of a happy future together, and the result is often far more
damaging than a bruised ego. Physical assault is probably what women fear most, but theft of your worldly
goods and most prized possessions is a more common outcome for both sexes. There are plenty of men and
women out there ready to take advantage of a lonely heart to line their pockets, and a very small number of
men are looking for something a lot more sinister.
But no-one wants to enter into a potentially life changing new relationship worrying about whether they’re
going to be ripped off, and scrabbling up the greasy career pole limits the amount of time we can spend finding
out, so what can we do to meet that fantastic new partner without being suspicious of their motives?
Dating is a huge business growth area that can offer choice and opportunity to meet a wide range of people. There are all sorts
of options – you can meet potential partners via the small ads, online, over specially arranged singles dinners, and personalised
introductions for one hour or 3 minutes – there is something for everyone.
Introduction agencies can offer a high degree of protection. Many check out the identity of applicants before taking them onto their
books, so at least you know that ‘John Smith’ is exactly who he says he is. Those that interview prospective members at length also
ensure that the Daniel Craig lookalike you thought you were meeting doesn’t turn out to be Nick Cotton from Eastenders! That,
together with an independent experienced judgement as to whether you are in fact potentially compatible, can save you a lot of time
and effort, not to mention heartache.
Check that any agency you are thinking of joining is a member of the ABIA; this will offer you some protection from poor service
or being ripped off. The ABIA code of practice ensures that its members have been operating for at least a year, each has an office
dedicated to its business rather than just a PO Box number, and will offer you the services of a comparable agency should yours go
under. It also conducts mystery-shopper style investigations to ensure compliance with the code, will investigate complaints on your
behalf, and mentor new businesses to ensure good practice is adhered to from the start.
Potentially the riskiest place to find a partner is on-line. More and more people are signing up to the hundreds of new and ‘free’
dating sites to be found on the net. If you’re tempted, what you are really getting is a place on the web where you can post your
details for strangers to read and be able to contact you. Anyone can set up a dating website – literally anyone. For most people,
online dating is either a positive experience, or at the very least, it’s harmless and doesn’t cost too much. But be aware that the vast
majority of dating sites do not screen their members at all. So sex offenders, con artists and criminals can join and mix in with
genuine people looking for a short cut to lurve. If you are happy with the risks and feel this is the route for you, at least make sure (a)
your chosen dating site is a member of the ABIA and (b) you pay for the service; fraudsters aren’t keen on paying for the privilege
of defrauding you.
And once you are signed up, watch out for scammers trying to get you to part with hard earned cash by asking for financial help;
excuses include
• I want to see you but don’t have enough money to travel.
• I’ve been robbed/beaten and my wallet stolen
• I need urgent surgery
• My Mother/Father/Sister etc is seriously ill and I can’t afford the medical bills
You get the picture!
I wish you much luck in meeting the partner of your dreams; let’s hope this guide ensures you don’t have to
kiss too many frogs before your Prince or Princess arrives to provide a life of happiness and security.
Jacqui Hames is the presenter of ITV’s Crime Channel and is one of Britain’s best-known real life detectives,
having presented live TV appeals on the BBC flagship show Crimewatch for 16 years. After serving with the
Metropolitan Police for over 25 years she is now seen regularly on GMTV and Sky News. Jacqui has written
a book, in collaboration with Fiona Bruce, ‘Savvy – the smart girls guide to having it all without risking it all’.
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
The 'Lists' Method
1992
UK & Ireland
30 - 80
£49 - £95
6 months - 12 months
1998
Telephone Support
No
Love and Friends . com
19 Boundaries Road Balham London SW12 8RT
Tel: 020 3239 0251
through a message service. 'Essentials' is a higher level of
service which is charged for and gives members access to
advanced features. Events also organised.
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Online Dating
1999
UK & Ireland
18 - 99
Free membership ? upgrades
available for an additional
charge.
2 weeks, 1 month, 3 months, 6
months, 1 year
2004
Yes
www.loveandfriends.com
Internet dating and friendship agency. Basic free
membership includes comprehensive profile, member
search and limited availability to contact other members
through a message service. Full membership gives
members access to advanced features and unlimited
messaging. Events also organised
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Online Dating
1999
UK & Ireland
18 - 99
Free membership option and
upgrades available for an
additional charge. 1 month £16.95 3 months - £34.95 12
months - 95.95
1 month - 12 months
2007
No
RSVP
2 Saddlers Court Oakham LE15 7GH
Tel: 01572 774884
www.rsvp-int.co.uk
RSVP is a Dating Agency and Singles Club for single
professionals in London, Birmingham, Cambridge, Oxford
and elsewhere across London, the Home Counties and the
Heart of England. RSVP offers three memberships:
Neon Singles Events Membership
Neon Membership gives you access to numerous singles
events across London, the Home Counties and the Heart of
England every month, all of which are hosted. These include
dinners, dances, walks, activity days, theatre nights,
...
Categories
Established
Area covered
Lovestruck.com
T: 020 3287 7761
Age range
Fees
www.lovestruck.com
A dating service for city singles
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Online Dating
2006
UK, Dublin, Hong Kong,
Singapore, Tokyo and Sydney
18-65
Connect: £37 for 1 month, £65
for 3 months, £99 for six
months, £139 for 12 months.
Elite £57 for for 1 month, £99
for 3 months, £149 for six
months, £219 for 12 months
1, 3, 6 and 12 months
2012
Yes
Midsummer's Eve
Office 34 Surbiton Business Centre 46 Victoria Road
Surbiton Surrey KT6 4JL
Tel: 0870 7606 888
www.midsummerseve.com
Online dating and friendship agency. Basic lifetime
membership includes the ability to contact other members
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions, Events
1992
London, Beds, Bucks, Cambs,
Derbys, Essex, Herts, Kent,
Leics, Lincs, Notts, Northants,
Oxon, Staffs, Surrey, Sussex,
Warks, West Midlands & Worcs
25 - 99
Registration fees: Neon £425,
Gold £945, Platinum £1,999.
Monthly service fees: Neon
£25.95, Gold £35.95, Platinum
£49.95.
Lifetime, subject to payment of
monthly service fee.
1999
Personal coaching, image
coaching, dating workshops
and a members' website for
dating advice, event booking,
etc.
No
Sara Eden
March House 13 Park Street Windsor Berkshire SL4 1LU
Tel: 01753 830350
www.sara-eden.co.uk
Unlimited introductions. All applicants interviewed. Personal
contact maintained throughout membership. Specializing in
professionals, academics, doctors, bankers, lawyers,
managers, creative types, businessmen and women, media
and film folk. Over 2500 members. Guaranteed minimum
number of introductions.
Going through changes
How dating has changed in the last 50 years, by Heather Heber-Percy, Chair of the ABIA
Over the last twenty five years, I have seen an enormous change of attitude towards the dating industry as a whole, thank
goodness. It has now become socially acceptable to meet through an agency, although men still feel that by joining an
introduction agency they have somehow failed, because they have not been able to find a partner on their own. Certainly it
is the attitude of most men, that they still wish to be the ones to pursue rather than be pursued, especially men in their late
fifties onwards.
What most people do not realise is that society has changed out of all recognition during the last fifty
years. If you take yourself back in time to the late fifties, people from all walks of life would happily
go off to their local dance hall and dance the night away with complete strangers. They would be
accompanied by the music from relatively large live bands who would play a variety of jazz and music
for wonderful foxtrots, waltzes and, of course, the samba. Edmundo Ross was at the height of his
career and excited the musical tastes of people across the social divide. It was socially acceptable to
meet people this way and, of course, because people danced closely to each other, they had to talk to
each other.
When rock and roll music kicked in, that was the end of any meaningful dialogue for many years. In
the 1960s, virtually every dance hall in the country closed down and a little bit of important social
history disappeared forever. Also in the late 1950s people began to move away from their home towns
to work, especially as the car became more reliable and the UK became more prosperous. This sadly
had a gently corrosive effect on families and relationships generally as we slowly distanced ourselves from close ties.
Television didn’t help either, it was easier to sit in front of a screen rather than go out with friends and, of course, cheaper,
but again people stopped communicating with each other to a large extent and, as television became more sophisticated, oldfashioned social exchanges between neighbours and close friends became less and less frequent. Perhaps this all sounds rather
too far-fetched, but it has had an impact on how we manage to connect with other people today.
There are of course many other factors involved, but suffice to say that simply meeting the love of your
life through family or friends is no longer an option at any age. Thinking now about how people come
to matchmakers like me, we have in a way become like their family and friends, doing the job that
mums and dads did years ago for their sons and daughters, except that now of course we have such a
high divorce rate that we are also encompassing a much older age group too.
Would you believe people join our agency up to the age of eighty? And why not? Why should
someone of eighty have to live life alone? We were never meant to be alone as creatures on this earth
and companionship is such a blessed thing. One of my clients said to me recently that she wanted
to find someone who she could ‘sit in the silence with and not feel the silence’. It’s all about sharing
life’s ups and downs, sometimes getting incredibly irritated with each other, but at the end of the day
would you really want to be without your partner? Life is so much more meaningful when it is shared
with someone special.
Interestingly our clients are embracing a new freedom in this new society. They are not necessarily giving up their lifestyles,
homes and livelihoods to be with their partner; they are spending time with each other in both homes and perhaps only
spending weekends together. But is that so wrong? No, not in my opinion; it means that families need not be concerned
about mother or father selling up and giving it all to the new partner, money stays put, because they each have their own
separate finances. It means simply that family harmony is retained and the couple concerned can go on enjoying each other’s
company without falling out with concerned sons and daughters!
I welcome these many changes. They reflect the rich diversity in people of all ages and backgrounds finding relationships that
work for them. As matchmakers, we are here to cater for these changing needs of our clients.
And to those of you teetering on the edge, wondering whether to take the plunge into the wonderful world of dating, I say
‘come on in, the water’s lovely’!
Heather Heber-Percy is one of Britain’s foremost introduction agency specialists. She set up a small agency in
Herefordshire in 1986 which quickly grew to national coverage within 3 years. From the beginning, she based
her service on personal interviews rather than ‘matching’ people through questionnaires or computer databases.
In 1991, she sold the business to concentrate on providing the more in-depth search process offered by the
County Register.
Her expertise and knowledge means that she is often called upon for professional opinion and comment by the
national press and media. She has been a member of the Association of British Introduction Agencies since 1987
and is currently Chair.
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions
1988
London and the Home Counties
25 - 75
Discovery £715; Regular
£1,015; Executive £1,530;
Executive Plus £2,550;
Personal Consultant Gold
£4,125; Personal consultant
Platinum £6,125; Founder
membership from £10,210
1 year, plus 6 to 24 months
freeze time depending on
membership level
1988
Events
No
Select Personal Introductions
Piccadilly House 49 Piccadilly Manchester M1 2AP
Tel: 0161 872 3900
www.selectservices.co.uk
Select Personal Introductions Agency is a dating agency for
single professionals in Manchester, Leeds, Cheshire,
Lancashire and Chester.
All members are based in and around the Northwest /
Yorkshire areas and as such local introductions are
provided. Select caters for business and professional people
offering unlimited introductions, which are personally hand
selected by our team of highly experienced dating
consultants.
...
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions,
Headhunting Services, Events
1997
Manchester, Lancashire,
Cheshire, Leeds, West
Yorkshire, Chester / Wirral,
Merseyside, North Wales and
South Cumbria.
22 - 65
From £275 to £895, (monthly
fees applicable to some
memberships, from £18.50 to
£37.50).
1 & 2 years, also lifetime
membership (subject to
payment of monthly fee).
2000
Events
No
Seventy Thirty
12 Hans Road Knightsbridge London SW3 1RT
Tel: 020 7753 7631
www.seventy-thirty.com
The luxury matchmaking and introduction agency, providing
a discreet, global service for our affluent members
Categories
Established
Area covered
Personal Introductions,
Headhunting Services
2005
International
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Other services
Same gender matching
21 - 80
From £13,200 - £100,000.
12 months
2006
Relationship Coaching and
Life Coaching
Yes
Suman Marriage Bureau
83 South Road Southall Middlesex UB1 1SQ
Tel: 0208 574 4867 / 0208 571 5145
www.s-m-b.com
Personal introduction service, providing one-to-one
introduction meetings or personal contact information for
direct contact. Unlimited introductions. Professional and nonprofessional Asian to Asian and Asian to non-Asian. On-line
service also available independent of agency service.
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Personal Introductions
1972
UK & Worldwide
18 - 80
£295 Registration Fee
(Standard Service) £545
Registration Fee (Special
Personal Service) £1095
Registration Fee (Platinum
Personal Service) £235
Marriage Settlement.
12 months
1981
No
Suman Online
83 South Road Southall Middlesex UB1 1SQ
Tel: 0208 571 5145
www.suman-online.com
DIY matrimonial service, all ages and backgrounds, for those
seeking an Asian partner for marriage. Online members may
also be approached by the agency (at no charge) if their
profile suits the details of premier service members.
Registration from free. Pay on demand service (payment
must be made to contact other members). 3 month
membership £40 6 month membership £70 12 month
membership £120 Membership renewed for free up to three
times if match not found during initial period of membership.
...
Categories
Established
Area covered
Age range
Fees
Length of membership
ABIA member since
Same gender matching
Online Dating
2000
UK & Worldwide
20 - 70
3 month membership £40 6
month membership £70 12
month membership £120
3 months +
1981
No
Why smart singles choose an ABIA agency
1. Published prices
All agencies are required to declare their prices before meeting you. So you can be sure there’ll be no attempt to charge what
they feel you can afford.
2. Quantified number of introductions
The experience of ABIA members means they’re well-positioned to make an accurate estimate at the outset of how many
introductions you can expect whilst you’re a member. And if the agency is prepared to make a guarantee to that effect, you
can rely on them having remedies to protect you should the guarantee not be met. (Not online agencies)
3. Open to their members
Whilst many agencies will be only too happy to come and meet you near where you live, it’s always reassuring to know that
you can pay them a visit should you ever wish to. All ABIA agencies have a room set aside for interviews. And all our offline
agencies have a phone number where you can get dating advice and discuss your membership. (Not online agencies)
4. Confidentiality
All ABIA agencies will treat your details with the strict confidentiality required by the Data Protection Act 1998. Unlike
many agencies outside the ABIA, your information will not be sold, lent or otherwise divulged to third parties outside of the
industry or without your consent, so you’ll not suddenly become the unwitting recipient of junk mail or spam.
5. Balanced membership
Every ABIA-registered agency is required to maintain roughly equal proportions of men and women on their books (though
that doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll all meet your criteria). Ask the pertinent question ‘how many introductions can you
expect to receive’.
6. Long-established agencies
Whilst it’s entirely possible for a sole trader to set up an introduction agency from their kitchen table, such businesses rarely
last and are unlikely to offer the depth of membership and expertise that today’s clients demand. So the ABIA look for
reputation, experience and longevity before accepting an agency into membership.
7. Truthful advertising
ABIA-registered agencies abide by the codes of practice in force for print and broadcast media, so you can be sure there’ll be
no wildly exaggerated claims or misleading statements in advertising, brochures or publicity material.
8. Swift response to complaints
In the unlikely event of your not being happy with an aspect of the service provided by your chosen agency, you can expect
the agency to deal promptly with your complaint and – in the event that you and your agency fail to reach an amicable
solution – you can turn to the ABIA for help and advice, if communication between your and your agency has ground to a
halt.
9. The ABIA Code of Practice
The ABIA carries out regular inspections to be sure that member agencies comply with the Code of Practice. And that code
is always available for new members when they join.
10.Your right to transfer your membership
Whilst it’s a pretty unlikely scenario, it’s comforting to know that, in the event that the agency you signed up with ceases to
trade, you can apply to the ABIA to have the balance of your membership transferred to another agency. (Not online agencies)
The contents of this booklet were believed to be correct at the time of going to print but neither the ABIA nor its officers or employees can accept any
responsibility for errors, omissions and changes. You are strongly advised to check current details, terms and conditions with agencies themselves before
entering into any form of contract.