Hey Kids, Comics!

WHAT IS “HEY KIDS, COMICS!”?
Hey Kids, Comics! is an anthology featuring the true-life “secret origins” of
comic book pros, TV and film writers, authors, journalists, and other people
from all walks of life detailing why they love comic books so much, and
how comics have influenced their lives.
With comic books a greater part of the culture than they have ever been
(from movies to TV shows to live theater), Hey Kids, Comics! takes a look
back to show how this medium grabbed several generations of kids and
never let go.
who’s involved in “hey kids, comics!”?
Here are some of the people who have all-new essays in Hey Kids, Comics!:
• Alan Brennert (Author of the bestselling novels Palisades Park and Moloka’i, an Emmy-winning producer for L.A. Law)
• J.M. DeMatteis (Comic book writer of Spider-Man, Justice League of
America, author of Brooklyn Dreams)
• Steve Englehart (Comic book writer for Batman, Justice League of America,
author of Tor’s Max August series)
• Sholly Fisch (Comic book writer for Superman, DC Super Friends, and
Batman: Brave and the Bold)
• Paul Kupperberg (Comic book writer for DC and Archie, author of
Grosset & Dunlap’s Kevin Keller)
• Roxanna Meta (Cosplayer)
• Tim Neenan (Writer/Actor, Children’s Hospital and NTSF: SD: SUV)
• Jill Pantozzi (Comics journalist; columnist for The Mary Sue)
• Erika Duckworth Peterman (Comics journalist; co-creator of GirlsGoneGeek.com)
• Tim Schlattmann (Writer/Producer, Showtime’s Dexter)
• Mark Wheaton (Screenwriter, Friday the 13th)
...and many more!
who CREATED “HEY KIDS, COMICS!”?
Hey Kids, Comics! was created and edited by Rob Kelly, a writer, illustrator, and comics historian. Kelly writes the award-winning webcomic Ace Kilroy, and is the EIC of the world-famous (no, really!)
Aquaman Shrine blog, which has been mentioned in Entertainment
Weekly, the British Observer, and other media outlets.
He has written for magazines like Back Issue! and Comic Book Creator,
and Hey Kids, Comics! is based on his blog of the same name, created in 2007. As an illustrator, his clients include the National Basketball Association, Estee Lauder, Harper Collins, Time Out New York,
Forbes, Popular Science, Vibe, and many others.
WHAT ARE PEOPLE SAYING ABOUT“HEY KIDS, COMICS!”?
Here are some of Hey Kids, Comics!’s Amazon customer reviews:
“***** I predict I will be re-reading this anthology and its life-affirming stories
many times, whenever I want to return to a simpler day when I could solve all
crimes with my makeshift Bat Utility belt, when I never doubted my eventual
super powers, and when the good guys really did win.
“‘Hey Kids, Comics!’ makes me feel a little less alone in this sometimes “shipwrecked” world. And really...isn’t that the very best you can ask of a book?”-psssst, heybuddy!, 9/7/13
“***** The nearest thing to a negative word that I can say about this book
is that, when it was over, I wanted so much more of it.”--J. David Weter,
9/26/13
“***** If you are or ever were a comic-book fan, you owe it to yourself to read
this book. You will not be disappointed.”-- Russell Burbage, 9/30/13
“Between it’s covers you will find a treasure trove of some of the funniest, heart
warming (and in one case life threatening) stories of how some of the industries best started reading comics and how far some will go to continue reading
them.”-- David Goodman, Geekadelphia.com
“This book is so incredibly charming. People say ‘must-read’ in relation to
a lot of things, but if you ever studied the layout of the Wayne Foundation
building or wondered, ‘Who Would Win…?’ this is for you.”-- Kevin Lauderdale, AuthorMagazine.org
Listed on AintItCoolNews.com’s 2013 Holiday Gift Guide
ARE THERE PHOTOS, TOO?
Yes! In addition to the essays, Hey Kids, Comics! features vintage
photos of kids and their comics, both from the authors and others
who grew up just as obsessed.
SAMPLE ESSAYS
Here are two of the essays from Hey Kids, Comics!
THE COMIC BOOK BARON OF NEW JERSEY
by DOUG SLACK
“Five dollars!”
I said the words slowly and carefully enough to convey the prestige of the
four-color treasure I removed from the brown paper bag.
My mom hit the brakes and stared with her mouth agape. Perhaps her
knuckles whitened as she gripped the steering wheel. I couldn’t say because I was
busy watching her eyes as they lifted from the comic book in my hands to my face
to some point further on out in the distance where she may have been hopelessly
looking to see where exactly she had failed. I recognized
this expression and braced myself for attack.
The comic seemed like a sound investment at the time.
I spotted Tales of the New Teen Titans #1: Cyborg a week
prior, sleeved in a thick mylar and pinned to the wall behind the counter of Heroes World. I had been collecting
comics regularly for a few years and had just entered the
Anal Stage. This is the most regretful, shameful stage of a
comic fan’s life what with the plastic sleeves and the backing boards and the long boxes.
I was a devotee of the annual Robert M. Overstreet
Official Comic Book Price Guide. I would actually spend hours
reading that ridiculous book, pouring over titles and prices, admiring the ludicrous
supplies advertised in the color pages, wishing I could someday own one of those
precious collector’s items that were worth thousands.
In my greedy quest to become New Jersey’s biggest comic book baron I
bought every “Collectors Item!” I could get my hands on. Somewhere within my
moronic reasoning synapses, I determined that limited series and one-shot issues
were the best investment. Something about a limited run translating into increased
consumer demand, I think. Occasionally this insistence on collecting first issues
reaped quality material such as the original Claremont/Miller Wolverine miniseries.
But it also compelled me to blow cash on Marvel’s Annie movie adaptation and Captain Carrot & His Amazing Zoo Crew #1 (Guest appearance by Superman?! Double
score!).
So there was Cyborg, as rendered by George Perez, posing on the cover of
the first issue of Tales of the New Teen Titans (four-issue limited series!) in all of his
cybernetic glory. The hero who was part man, part robot stood firmly in the center
of the cover, cyber feet planted a full yard apart, cyber fists clenched as he broke a
giant steel chain from around his mighty cyber torso. It was the first time I had ever
heard of the character and at least I can say that my initial interest wasn’t capitalistic.
I actually thought he looked cool.
When I noticed the title had “Teen Titans” in it the dollar signs cha-chinged
over my eyes. This was 1984 when The New Teen Titans was DC’s hottest book. The
early issues were already worth double digits. Double digits! This was a mere spinoff title, but Heroes World—surely a fair-minded establishment—already had it
tagged at five dollars. Obviously the value of this book was going places and I could
still afford to get in on the ground floor of this excellent investment opportunity.
The following week I returned with the cash in my Wranglers, ready to make
my most expensive single comic book purchase to date. I distinctly remember how
nonchalant the clerk was about the whole transaction. It was as if she didn’t realize what a valuable commodity she was handling. I had assumed brokering this sale
would carry the same weight as closing a deal at Sotheby’s Auction. If she was impressed at what a big shot comic book collector I was (as I just knew she would be)
her manner didn’t betray it. Casually—I swear it was almost carelessly—she separated the issue from its mylar sleeve.
I blurted out, “Oh no, uh, I-I’ll take that too!”
“It’s an extra fifty cents.”
Good thing I brought some extra change just in case. No way was Cyborg
traveling home in nothing but a flimsy paper bag.
I would be lying if I said I didn’t feel a twinge of buyer’s remorse. I’m sure
every baron has moments of doubt. What I needed was a little reassurance. I needed
someone else to tell me I made the right investment. So I showed my mom.
Which brings us back to the station wagon outside the mall.
“There better be something else inside that bag...”
“Nope! This is it!”
“No. Oh...no! Ohhhh you were ripped off!”
“No! No! It’s the Teen Titans...and see? Number one! Number ones are always more—”
“Five dollars?!?”
“Well it is over a year old...!”
“It’s not even a new one?! No, take it back.”
“It’s an investment!”
“Go inside and get your money back. I’ll go with you.”
“No!”
The horror of such a thing occurring—of my mother dragging me back
through the mall to Heroes World to demand justice—was enough to put me on
the defensive. I dug in my heels and said, “You don’t understand! This is a collectors item!
I’m a Collector! This is going to get more valuable!”
“Oh, Doug...”
“Look. I’ll make you a deal. Just wait until next year’s Overstreet Price Guide comes out
and we’ll see if it goes up in value. Just let me keep it until then.”
In retrospect I don’t know what kind of retarded deal that was supposed
to be. What happens if she was right? Was Heroes World really going to give me a
refund on a six-month old purchase? But she relented.
“Alright. We’ll just wait until that new book comes out and then we’ll see. Grrr, mutter,
gripe, five dollars, kvetch...”
After we arrived home I carefully read the issue (lay flat on the table, turn
pages slowly from the top corner) then returned it to its sleeve. I inserted an acid
free backing board and sealed the top with scotch tape. Luckily the “T” titles fell
in the middle of my long box so Cyborg was wedged safely inside my collection.
There it waited to silently appreciate in value and ultimately vindicate me.
Today you can purchase Tales of the New Teen Titans #1: Cyborg from various online sellers for $1.00. That cost does not include mylar sleeve.
DOUG SLACK is a comics artist/writer and the creator of Slacker Comics. He grew up and
lives in New Jersey, where he also teaches cartooning and painting. At ten years old he bicycled to
the 7-11 and, for the first time, used his own money to buy comic books. He hasn’t looked back
since.
I WAS A COLLEGE COMIC BOOK READER
by ELISABETH RAPPE
I became a fan of comics rather late in life – if you can really call college
late. I’ve wondered why I didn’t get into them in childhood, and the answer is
actually quite pathetic and simple: I didn’t have access to them. They weren’t sold
in grocery stores anymore, so I never had the chance to flip through them. Comic
book stores were a specialized and daunting place and too far to drive to. Neither
of my parents was into comics so they didn’t see any reason to introduce me to
this medium. All I had was the X-Men cartoon.
I remember having some X-Men comics at one point. I don’t remember
where I got them, but I was really excited. More stories from the cartoon! Except…they weren’t. I was immediately frustrated because they didn’t match what
I knew from the show. It had the opposite effect a comic should have had – it
turned me off the medium. I couldn’t understand what was going on, and it made
me angry. I was a smart kid, I could get into any story,
but these left me bewildered.
Fast forward to my twenties, where I was suffering some major collegiate exhaustion. I was a super
honors student, and as a result, I was worn out. My
self-esteem was poor, I was depressed, and I buried
myself in more work. I left myself no time for anything. No movies, no television, no books. Classmates
of mine actually read novels in between research
papers. Not I! I figured time spent reading a novel was
time I could spend reading Roman Britain for my next
paper. The most I could allow myself was a magazine.
A bunch of events coincided to shove me into
the world of Marvel and DC, but the short version of it was that my online
friends asked me why I didn’t read comics. I explained that I found comics confusing. All that continuity and mythology! You picked a book up and it made no
sense. They smiled, understanding, and started making me lists or sending me
books. They sent New X-Men series, House of M, and V for Vendetta, and Phoenix:
Endsong. After earning a little bit of cred, one of my college friends conceded to
my enthusiasm and lent me Elektra, The Dark Knight Returns, Watchmen, and
Frank Miller and Chris Claremont’s Wolverine. I loved all of it, but especially clung
to my childhood favorite – the X-Men. I was also secretly (I didn’t want my “cool
comic book” friends finding out) reading Top Cow’s Tomb Raider series with just as
much enthusiasm.
What I learned was not only how rich and enjoyable comics were, I found out
them to be the perfect cure for what ailed me. Comics were relaxing to my overtaxed
brain. They were short enough that I could read them without feeling guilty that I
was losing research time. I could allow myself an hour to speed through a few issues, and not feel cheated. I loved the stories, the art, the color, and the action. I was
just so sucked in. More than anything else, it was an escape to a new world, where I
didn’t have to think about my honors thesis, my credits, my student loans, or graduate school. It was a very basic place where Wolverine fought bad guys, and I could go
with him. I was basically like every kid who discovered the power of comics – and
like every kid, began considering Wolverine and Lara Croft my secret friends. Only I
was twenty-four!
Now, I was fortunate enough to have landed a quiet job working for my thesis
advisor and medieval professor, Dr. Taylor. There wasn’t much for me to do in the
office, so I’d generally play on the computer or read comics. I distinctly remember
that I was working my way through The Essential Wolverine. One day, Dr. Taylor came
in, and it was sitting there on my desk. The cover was bright yellow, it was impossible to miss, and he gave me a funny look. He shook his head, amused. Professors
are notoriously bad at recognizing pop culture icons, and while Dr. Taylor was better
than most, he considered comics to be pretty silly.
“It’s Wolverine,” I said. “Don’t knock him! He’s awesome.”
“I don’t know who that is.”
“He’s one of the X-Men. He’s a mutant. He has an adamantium skeleton and claws that
were given to him in an experiment. He kills but he doesn’t want to. He’s tormented.”
I could tell from Dr. Taylor’s tone that he just thought it was kind of silly. I’d
talked to him about comics before and he didn’t dismiss the art form, but he clearly
thought something as garish as Wolverine was just childish. He thought his kids
should be reading it, not his twenty-five-year old student worker.
“He’s complicated,” I said. “A warrior who has a poetic soul. He’s kind of a —” Now,
you quickly learn in talking to professors that you need to come up with a really old
literary or historical reference. “He’s a Byronic hero.”
“Ohhhhh. Well, THAT I understand. Byronic hero, I understand that, yes. That’s very
cool.”
I could tell he still thought I should actually be reading Byron, but he was
content with my analyzing Wolverine from a scholar’s point of view. I knew I could
never really get him to crack the cover of that omnibus, but I was proud of myself for having made it sound more intelligent and nuanced than it was. I know my
choice of reading material came up a few more times (I seem to remember Dr. Taylor once saying “Well, it’s no Wolverine!” about a book he was recommending to me)
and I always gave pat answers of “Come on, I read them because they’re short, and
it’s relaxing” or “It’s just for the train, the pictures prevent me from getting headaches, I read
regular books at home.”
I didn’t dare tell anyone the truth – that my insecurity was so rampant that
I was using comic templates to rebuild my tough personality. I needed to be tough
again, and I did what little kids have done before me, and used superheroes as my
inspiration. I would deliberately get into what I called a “Lara Croft” mentality to
confront people and situations that needed confronting. When I was angry – really,
really, really angry – I know there was more of a touch of Wolverine in there. I’d
be lying if I said I wasn’t, as many kids before me have been, wishing for a pair of
adamantium claws! (Haven’t we all had a few mental SNIKT moments? That can’t
just be me, can it?)
So, I continued to tell Dr. Taylor that I was reading Wolverine for his Byronic depth and poetry, but in reality the Ol’ Canucklehead was helping me dodge my
thesis and Lara Croft was helping me face down evil librarians. It’s a sign of how
much more of a never-back-down berserker I had become when Dr. Taylor turned
to his wife, and said “Next time we have a interdepartmental fight, we’ll just let
Elisabeth off the leash.”
I’m pretty sure Lord Byron never did that for anybody.
ELISABETH RAPPE is such a geek that academia couldn’t contain her, so she works on the
Internet where she writes about movies, television, and comics for anyone who will host her. Her
favorite character is still Wolverine, and she will buy any comic he’s in. Yes, she’s part of the problem.
WHERE CAN PEOPLE GET “HEY KIDS, COMICS!”?
Hey Kids, Comics! is available in paperback on Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/193988800X
CreateSpace:
https://www.createspace.com/4422055
Etsy:
https://www.etsy.com/shop/HeyKidsComics
contact information
Rob Kelly, Creator/Editor
[email protected]
856-261-2265
To learn more about Hey Kids, Comics!, visit:
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