FEATURE - Blue Hill Farm

FEATURE
Bibby Farmer Hill has
been an integral part of
the career of her daughter,
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the moms who put them
Growing up as the child of a top equestrienne doesn’t guarantee
your own success in the saddle. But it doesn’t hurt, either.
I
By MOLLIE BAILEY
MOLLIE BAILEY PHOTO
f you look carefully in the stands at any horse show, you can
see them: professional horsewomen packed together to watch
their children compete, at least as nervous as the other parents—though they’re obviously more accustomed to watching rides from the in-gate than helplessly from the bleachers.
Many of them put their own riding careers on hold to raise
and support the next generation of equestrians, and even after
their kids are grown and honing their own professional careers,
many still plan their own work schedules around sitting in those
bleachers, riding every stride alongside their children. These children, in turn, have enjoyed the advantage of their mothers’ connections, wisdom and innate talent, but often they’ve also had to
shake off associated expectations to find their own success.
In honor of Mother’s Day, we reached out to multi-generational horsewomen (and one young man as well) to explore the
sacrifices, challenges and joys of sharing not just genes, but a
lifelong passion.
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LEADING BY EXAMPLE:
Bibby Farmer Hill and Kelley Farmer
hen Kelley Farmer was
11, she asked her mother,
Bibby Farmer Hill, for a
minibike just like all her
friends at the horse shows had. But Hill
couldn’t afford one, so she told her daughter if she figured out how to earn the
money herself, she’d track down a used
one.
“She found this guy with a mango
grove,” Hill recalls, “and she and a friend
made him a deal that they’d take his mangos and sell them, and they’d pay him half
and keep the other half. So every day in
the summer, the girls would go ride in the
morning then go gather mangos and set
up a mango stand on the side of the road,
and all the people coming home from
work would stop and buy mangos. Sure
enough, she earned the money, and I had
Bibby Farmer HillGOT
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to go find her that minibike.”
Farmer’s precocious gumption and
sense of responsibility didn’t surprise
Hill. After all, she herself had had to earn
money to buy her first saddle as a child,
and she’d always emphasized that same
self-reliance to her daughter, in and out of
the barn.
“I grew up knowing that my mother
had instilled in me that work ethic,” says
Farmer, 39. “I knew that just because I was
a good rider, that didn’t make me a trainer
or able to be an accomplished professional.
She taught me that when I turned pro, I
wasn’t going to walk into a riding job.
She did everything possible, everything
known to man, to give me a better opportunity or a better ride. Everything I have
is because of her.”
Farmer grew up in Miami, where
her mother worked managing barns and
teaching lessons, and the connections she
made through Hill have echoed throughout her storied riding career. Farmer’s
first saddle was a hand-me-down from
David Burton Jr., and when Farmer was
too small to protest, Margie Engle would
get a kick out of dunking her in the water
trough at her Gladewinds Farm.
In tough times the horse world also
provided support, like when Farmer’s
father, tennis pro Carl Richard Farmer,
battled leukemia. For a time Hill juggled raising her daughter, caring for her
sick husband and working in the barn.
When Rich’s health went downhill (he
died when his daughter was just 7), Kelley briefly moved in with Jennifer Beiling
and her four sisters, joking that she was
the sixth Beiling.
Hill used her connections and eye
for horseflesh to make sure her daughter
always had something to ride, albeit often
unbroken ponies or very green mounts.
But people started noticing when their
ponies came back better than they’d left,
and Kelley got a big break at AHSA Pony
with Kelley focusing
on high-end open
hunters at Lane
Change Farm and
Hill training many
of the top pony hunters in the country
out of Don Stewart
Stables, they’re still
intertwined.
Hill
invests in horses her
daughter rides, having owned part of
Scripted, Certainty
and Mindset, along
with one of Kelley’s newest rides, In
The first person to congratulate Kelley FarmerONHERSECONDPLACED
Private. And Kelley lNISHATTHE53(*!)NTERNATIONAL(UNTER$ERBY&INALSWASHERMOTHER"IBBY
occasionally
hops &ARMER(ILL
aboard one of Hill’s
ponies for a tune-up, counting 2013 USEF always been a certain horse or a certain
Pony Finals grand pony hunter champion place. She couldn’t watch Scripted for
Sassafras Creek as her favorite.
a long time, but she’s getting better. By
Hill also never misses a chance to Capital Challenge [Md.] last year, she
watch her daughter ride if she can possibly could peek around the corner and watch
get there—in theory. She’s so superstitious part of it.”
that she can’t always watch Kelley compete
Kelley describes their relationship havin real time.
ing nearly transcended the mother-daughWhen Kelley was a junior, Hill tried ter role. They’re best friends, and at the end
to keep herself calm by needlepointing but of the day, Hill is still the first one Kelley
often ended up poking fingernail holes calls when she has big news.
into the arm of fellow hunter guru Linda
“She still calls me when she’s excited
Hough, whose daughter Lauren was often about something and says, ‘Mom I just got
in the same classes. During Kelley’s big- a new horse! You have to see it! You’ll love
gest classes or with certain horses, Hill it!’ ” Hill says. “To me, that’s why she’s so
still can’t bring herself to watch and has to successful: because she has so much comwalk away.
passion for the horse and what it takes to
“She went to the barn the year Mythi- get there. If you ask me, she got the knack
cal was second at Derby Finals, and she and talent from her dad, and I hope she
couldn’t watch Round 2 of the Maclay learned the compassion and responsibility
Finals when I won,” Kelley says. “It’s from me.”
“She did everything possible, everything
known to man, to give me a better
opportunity or a better ride. Everything
I have is because of her.” —KELLEY FARMER
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MOLLIE BAILEY PHOTO
Finals (Va.) when she was 14. The Lindner family lent her a fantastic pony in
Change Of Heart the day before the final,
which she won. It was the springboard
that would catapult her to the top of the
ASPCA Maclay Finals (N.Y.) and help
her finish second at AHSA Medal Finals
(Pa.) and the Washington International
Equitation Championship (Md.).
Meanwhile Hill encouraged her
daughter to explore opportunities that
took her far from home. Kelley served as
a working student for Bill Cooney and
Frank Madden at Beacon Hill (N.J.) and
spent a month in California training with
Jimmy Williams at the Flintridge Riding
Club. When Havens Schatt aged out of
the juniors, Kelley headed to Ocala, Fla.,
to ride for Don Stewart Stables, and when
the farm needed a new barn manager,
Kelley called her mom and told her to
come help. The timing was right, and Hill
headed to Ocala to begin a 20-plus year
partnership with Stewart.
Even now that Kelley’s worked her
way to becoming a decorated rider and the
first hunter professional to earn a million
dollars in the sport since the U.S. Hunter
Jumper Association started keeping
records, she and her mother have stayed
very close. When Kelley broke her collarbone right before the 2014 USHJA International Hunter Derby Championships
(Ky.), her mother was there to nurse her
through her surgeries and provide moral
support, just as she was when a green pony
flipped 10-year-old Kelley, breaking her
pelvis.
“Anyone would do that for their
child,” Hill, 64, says with a shrug. “After
the collarbone we really had to get on her
case and hold her down. It was really frustrating, because she was second the year
before and had a great horse [in Mindful]
that was going well and looked like they
could win.”
While their careers have diverged,
FEATURE
FORGING THEIR OWN PATHS:
Jessica and Missy Ransehausen
PHOTO COURTESY OF LISA THOMAS
Though she grew
up in the shadow of
dressage legend Jessica
Ransehousen (standing,
with Hugh Knows) ,-ISSY
2ANSEHOUSENON#RITICAL
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n some ways, Missy Ransehausen’s résumé clearly echoes that
of her mother, Jessica Ransehausen. Both have ridden for
the flag in international competition, and
both served as chefs d’equipe for the U.S.
Equestrian Federation.
Both women even achieved the same
result at their first Pan American Games:
dressage team silver and individual fifth
for Jessica in 1959, and eventing team silver and individual fifth for Missy in 1995.
And Jessica watched her daughter win
team silver in person, as she was serving
as the dressage chef d’equipe at the time.
But Missy, 45, knew from the start
she wanted to find her own way rather
than stay her mother’s shadow. When Jessica moved the family to Europe to train
with Reiner Klimke in the 1970s, 7-yearold Missy learned to jump aboard Ingrid
Klimke’s first pony. Shortly thereafter she
announced to her mother—a five-time
national dressage champion and threetime Olympian—that she had no interest
in perfecting circles for the rest of her riding career.
Luckily Jessica had helped plenty of
eventers with their dressage, so she knew
where to get her daughter started once
they returned to the United States. Bruce
Davidson got Missy hooked on the sport
by pairing her up with a schoolmaster he’d
spotted in a clinic in Rhode Island. That
mare, Nina, took her through training level
and helped her earn her C-2 rating with the
Cheshire Pony Club (Pa.). As she moved up
the levels, her mother’s dressage expertise
suddenly became a major asset, especially
with her first upper-level horse, Druid.
“He was an amazing jumper, thank
God, because oh my God was he awful on
the flat!” recalls Missy. “It was so frustrating. I remember we would get into these
huge fights over him, and for the life of
me, I couldn’t do it. And of course I was
a hot teenager, and I’d mouth off and say,
PHOTO COURTESY OF JESSICA RANSEHOUSEN
Despite her
passion for
dressage,
*ESSICA
2ANSEHOUSEN
DIDNT
DISCOURAGEHER
DAUGHTERWHEN
SHEPREFERRED
JUMPINGFROMA
VERYYOUNGAGE
internationally against all these people,
and here’s my mother, who everyone knows,
in her classic American accent calling me
‘Pumpkin.’ I just about died.” —MISSY RANSEHOUSEN
‘Well then, you get on and do it!’ And she
would.”
By the time Missy started moving
up the levels under the tutelage of Karen
O’Connor, Wash Bishop and Grant
Schneidman, she and her mother both
had packed training and competition
schedules, and they rarely watched each
other compete. Even if Missy could have
traveled to her mother’s competitions, she
stayed home to care for the family’s Blue
Hill Farm in Unionville, Pa. Both were
working toward championships that happened within days of each other—Jessica
the 1988 Olympic Games in Seoul and
Missy toward the FEI North American
Young Rider Championship—so they
couldn’t support one another in person.
Jessica’s voice still swells with pride as
she recalls the phone call from her daughter reporting that she’d won NAYRC.
But of course, once the dust settled, she
couldn’t resist a chance to try to convince
her daughter to move back toward her
sport.
“After she won, I said, ‘Now just think,
we could branch out, and you could do a
little more serious dressage,’ ” says Jessica,
77. “She just looked at me and said, ‘Boring!’ ”
After her third Olympic performance,
Jessica focused on her new role as chef
d’equipe for the U.S. dressage team and
became a regular presence at her daughter’s competitions. She was there in England in the early ’90s when Missy debuted
at the Blenheim CCI***.
“My whole life my mom has called me
‘Pumpkin,’ ” says Missy. “And I’ll never
forget, I’m in the warm-up area at Blenheim on dressage day, and my mother
yells across the warm-up area to me, ‘Oh,
Pumpkin!’ I just about died. It was my first
time competing internationally against all
these people, and here’s my mother, who
everyone knows, in her classic American
accent calling me ‘Pumpkin.’ ”
Missy circled back to dressage in her
30s, competing two horses at Prix St.
Georges but still balancing it with eventing. And she attended more than her
share of pure dressage shows with Critical Decision—her mount for her thirdplaced finish at the 2008 Rolex Kentucky
CCI****—to help him settle in during
that phase.
By then she’d also settled into her role
as the coach of the U.S. para-dressage
team, which she held for 13 years starting
in 2000. She became involved with the
sport thanks to student Hope Hand, who
suggested Missy apply to coach the team.
While Jessica supported her daughter, she wasn’t expecting her to tackle that
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role. After finishing third at Rolex, Missy
was on track for a spot on the short list for
the upcoming Olympic Games in Hong
Kong, but she declined to pursue that
opportunity because of her commitment
to the team at the 2008 Paralympics.
“For me, that was disappointing,” Jessica admits. “She should have done that.
It would have been a perfect development
of everything she’s done in the past. But
I think she was very brave in her choice.”
Missy and Jessica still help each other
with students from time to time and fill in
when the other is out of town.
“For the longest time I’d always been
Jessica’s daughter,” says Missy. “Every now
and then she can be my mother. She’s
a phenomenal person, and it’s great to
be related to her. At times, when you’re
younger, you want to stand on your own
two feet, and you can’t. But I’m sure there
have been times that it’s helped me when
I’ve gone down centerline. I’m lucky to
have her.”
JOINING IN THE FUN:
Marilyn, Doug and Holly Payne
fter every cross-country
run, siblings Doug and
Holly Payne have an extra
task, almost as important
as cooling out their horses and checking
their time.
“They have to text me, as soon as
they’re off cross-country,” says their
mother, Marilyn Payne. “Either they
themselves or a groom has to text me to
tell me how it went. That started as soon
as I learned how to text.”
Her insistence is understandable.
There aren’t an awful lot of parents with
one four-star event rider as a child, let
alone two.
A well-rounded horsewoman with a
special interest in the first phase of eventing, these days Marilyn, 66, serves as a
busy four-star eventing judge and USEF
S-level dressage judge. She’s officiated at
the likes of the World Equestrian Games
PHOTO COURTESY OF THE PAYNE FAMILY
As children Doug and Holly
Payne learned the basics
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and the Olympic Games—when she’s not
running her Applewood Farm in Califon,
N.J., with her husband Dick Payne. She
plans her judging calendar with Doug’s
competition schedule in one hand and
Holly’s in the other, so she never misses
a major competition, and a few longtime favorites like Millbrook Horse Trials (N.Y.) and Stuart Horse Trials (N.Y.)
serve as annual family reunions.
One of the most stressful days of her
life came when Doug, 33, and Holly,
31, made their Rolex Kentucky CCI****
debut together in 2012. As luck would
have it, a random draw sent them out on
cross-country back-to-back.
“I had a heart attack,” Marilyn recalls.
“I was glued to the TV, because that’s the
best place to be, but all the riders around
me were laughing. Here I am screaming
and laughing. Both of them got around
safe, and it was great.
“I’m not scared [at big events],” she
continues. “They’re both good riders, and
While Dick and
Marilyn Payne
(standing)
encouraged their
children TOEXPERIENCE
LIFEOUTSIDETHEBARN
AFTERCOMPETINGAS
YOUNGRIDERSBOTH
$OUG AND(OLLYSTILL
BECAMEACCOMPLISHED
PROFESSIONALHORSEMEN
“Neither of us went to our college
graduations—sentimental things most parents
would care about. But at competitions she can
get emotional.” —HOLLY PAYNE
NANCY JAFFER PHOTO
follow in her footsteps.
“From the time we had our first pony,
we knew that after we graduated high
school, we’d sell whatever we had, and we
were going to college to focus on that,” says
they have good horses, and they don’t push Doug, New Hill, N.C. “Beyond that, it was
them beyond what they can do. I know our decision. If we were going to do it, we
they’ll take the time to get around safe. had to figure out how to make it happen.”
But of course you still worry some, and you
A few years into earning their degrees—
want them to do well and be happy.”
Doug in mechanical engineering from the
Marilyn never anticipated both her Rochester Institute of Technology (N.Y.)
children running at Rolex the same year; and Holly in finance at the University of
she didn’t even think they would turn out North Florida—they both started schedulto be professional riders. Sure, she put a crib ing time in the saddle around their classes.
in the barn when Doug was born, and for After graduation, Doug planned on becoma few years she always taught lessons with ing a forensic engineer in a police investigaa child strapped to her back. But her kids tion unit to finance riding as an amateur.
were driven by friendly sibling rivalry more But as he waited for the bankrupted state
than a pushy mother. Doug eschewed flat- to fund an academy class, he found himself
work until his little sister started beating out-earning his fellow graduates thanks to
him at competitions, and Holly used to set horses. And shortly after graduation, Holly
increasingly difficult lines to practice over. was back in the galloping lanes, too, trainMarilyn supported them as they earned ing and riding in Gladstone, N.J.
their A ratings from Somerset Hills Pony
Once they’d decided to dedicate themClub (N.J.) with instructors like Roger selves to the sport, Marilyn became their
Haller and Sally Ike, then went on to com- biggest cheerleader, encouraging Doug to
pete at the FEI North American Junior get his dressage judge’s license at just 26
and Young Rider Championships. But she and lending a hand to Holly at events.
wasn’t going to actively encourage them to
Holly’s remained an important asset
to her mother’s business, riding at the
farm nearly every day and filling in when
she’s out of town judging. And before a
big event, Doug always tries to ride his
dressage test for Marilyn to see where he
can save a point or two. In turn, the kids
inspired Marilyn to end her hiatus from
competition.
“We were driving home after an event,
and they were laughing and joking about
all the fun they’d had,” says Marilyn. “I
said, ‘You know what? I’m sick and tired of
you having all the fun. I love to compete.
I’m going to get my own horse.’ ”
That decision has brought the family
even closer. A few times a year all three
Paynes now compete at the same event
together, most recently in March at the
Carolina CIC, where Marilyn rode Safe
Harbor to second behind her son in a section of opening training.
“Neither of us went to our college graduations—sentimental things most parents
would care about,” says Holly. “But at competitions she can get emotional, especially
during the jog. I remember this fall at the
[Dutta Corp.] Fair Hill CCI*** [Md.],
when I was there riding [Never Outfoxed]
around, she was tearing up.”
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FEATURE
GIVING ROOM TO GROW:
ack in the late ’90s, DiAnn
Langer had a rather difficult employee: her daughter
Kirsten Coe.
After aging out of the juniors, Coe had
come back to work at Langtree, her mother’s Burbank, Calif., show stable. She’d
built up an impressive résumé, including
a win at the USEF Talent Search Medal
Final (Calif.) on her mother’s grand prix
jumper, Hearts Of Fire, and had big
dreams for her future in the saddle.
“She tried to take over my business,
and I had to give her a half-halt or two,”
recalls Langer, 67. “I think I fired her every
week.”
But Coe kept showing up anyway, getting her professional education while putting in long hours learning how to run a
50-horse operation.
When Coe was born to Langer and
her then-husband, western professional
Matthew Coe, Langer quit horses for
a year to focus on motherhood. When
Kirsten started toddling around, Langer
was determined to give her daughter a
taste of life outside a barn, and so she dutifully drove her to gymnastics, tap dance,
ballet and swimming lessons (where she
sunk like a rock), but it was no use: Kirsten
never imagined a day out of the tack.
When it was clear that her daughter would be following in her footsteps,
Langer made the conscious decision that
she wanted to be Kirsten’s mother, not her
trainer.
“I strongly believe in that,” Langer
says. “I’ve dealt with a lot of kids and their
parents. I don’t care if it’s a professional’s
child or anyone else’s. The parent must
remember that they’re the support, and the
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GLENNCAROL PHOTO
DiAnn Langer and Kirsten Coe
Kirsten Coe got her startINTHESADDLEEARLYTHANKSTOHERMOM$I!NN,ANGER
trainer is the one who at that moment is in
charge of what’s going on. The professional
has to deal with the victories and defeats.”
With that in mind, Langer shooed her
daughter off to trainer Karen Healey when
she neared her teenage years, but soon
Kirsten began looking beyond California.
For her last junior year she loaded a few
horses on a trailer and headed east solo to
create her own opportunities, riding for
Andre Dignelli at Heritage Farm as well
as Tom Wright, Missy Clark and McLain
Ward. Then she decided she wanted to ride
in Europe, so she moved to Germany to
work for Markus Beerbaum and Meredith
Michaels-Beerbaum.
And in 2006, after an eight-year stint
at her mother’s stable, Kirsten headed east
again to work for Heritage Farm, going
from a barn with 50 horses to one that took
more than twice that many to every major
horse show. She relished the opportunity
and called home regularly for support over
her five years there.
“She tried to take over my business, and I
had to give her a half-halt or two. I think
—DIANN LANGER
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DiAnn Langer decided that she wanted
to be her daughter’s mother, NOTHER
TRAINERWHETHERSHEWASCOMPETINGINTHESHORT
STIRRUPDIVISIONORWINNINGGRANDPRIXCLASSES
“I came from grooming my own horses
and making my own horses and trying to
make them work, so I had no problem listening to how hard she had to work,” says
Langer. “I didn’t care how many hours a
day she was at the barn, how many days
went by without a horse to get on. It’s a
difficult time for all riders.”
Kirsten started donning a pinque team
coat in 2008—just as her mother had a few
decades earlier—riding in Nations Cup
competition and at multiple FEI World
Cup Finals. Langer now serves as show
jumping young rider chef d’equipe and
technical advisor, and she’s chefed senior
Nations Cup teams as well, though never
for her daughter.
“It’s not that the team was the goal,”
Langer says. “It was, ‘Let’s try for [FEI
North American Junior and Young Rider
Championships],’ and once we did that,
we’d say, ‘Let’s try to do the national
junior jumper championship.’ As she
achieved one goal, we’d set another one. It
never occurred to me to be thinking about
riding on the team before we’d done these
other things.”
Like Hill, Langer was never a calm
customer watching her daughter compete,
and also like Hill she’d frequently find herself ringside with Linda Hough, jumping
every jump with their daughters in equitation classes. (They reunited in a box last
year at Holiday and Horses [Fla.] to share
in the stress as their daughters jumped in a
grand prix.) These days Langer’s job with
the USEF often requires her to leave her
Red Acre Farm in Johnson, S.C., to attend
many of the same shows as her daughter,
so she gets to watch her compete regularly.
“It takes time to develop the role that
each of you play in the relationship,” says
Kirsten, 34. “There are still days when I
have a bad round, and she says something
that will irritate me, but she almost always
knows when to step back and when to
push.
“I still do everything like my mom,”
continues Kirsten, who’s now based in
Royal Palm Beach, Fla. “She taught me
what hard work is. Sometimes my groom
throws me out of the barn because I’m trying to do too much. We had a new groom
who was freaking out because I was cleaning. It’s just how I was raised.”
But tidy tack trunks aren’t what keeps
mother and daughters close enough that
they talk on the phone several times a day.
“I’m most proud of the person she’s
become,” said Langer. “She’s principled,
she has integrity, and she’s just a good person. I’m proud of her when she wins, and
I think every parent is proud of their kid
when they succeed at what they’re trying
to accomplish. But the best part is that
she’s a cool person.”
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