March 2013 - Reach for a Difference

Autism Spectrum Partnering Network: Partnerships in Action
Roadmaps to Resources: Negotiating Spectrum Challenges
A Difference that makes a Difference: Otherwise it is just noise
REACH Monthly CommunityAction Meeting
Every First Tuesday of the month, March 5th, 6:00 P.M., 240 Cypress St., Abilene Texas, United Way Building
[email protected]
www.reachforadifference.org
SPECIAL EDITION
Love Letters to Our Children
March 2013
I.
II.
III.
IV.
V.
VI.
Vol. 3, No. 3
Upcoming Events
A Pledge to My Children by: Jerry Turning
Pg. 2-16
http://baconandjuiceboxes.blogspot.com/2013/03/my-pledge-to-my-children.html
Pg. 17
A Letter to Bobby, Lilly and Rosie by: Kim Wombles
A Letter to Hunter by: Mom, Dad, Sean, Ella and Hannah
To My Darling Daughter by: Keri Meuth
My Dearest Bean by: Dianna Crowley
Pg. 18-19
Pg. 20-11
Pg. 22
Pg. 22-24
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Calendar Of Events
To add your event to the calendar email us: [email protected].
*The Cisco College Anime Club
Room 119 on the Abilene campus the 1st & 3rd Tuesdays from 6 9 p.m. February through April & September through November.
The Cisco College Anime Club is geared towards the public
& to children & adults on the spectrum who love anime. A good
time for all involved. It will be potluck, bring some chips, cookies
or popcorn,
& enjoy watching anime with like-minded individuals. Parental
supervision for children & adolescents under age 15 is required.
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King David's Kids
"King David's Kids" exists to minister to developmentally
delayed children & their families. We seek to minister the
love of Jesus to each child, sibling, & parent - offering
love, acceptance & hope.
Parent/Guardian support groups are held bi-monthly
during the fall & spring, Support group meeting dates:
Feb 12, 26 - Mar 5, 19 - Apr 2, 16, 30
If you have any questions or would like to obtain an
application contact the KDK office at: King David’s Kids,
754 S. Treadaway, Abilene, TX
Phone: (325) 672-8837, Fax: (325)677-9144
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Lapping the Legacy
1st annual 5k walk/run around The Legacy Complex!
Saturday, March 9, 2013 at 7:00am
We are very excited about this event but we will need some help
from our friends & family around the community. If you know of
any companies wanting to sponsor us and have their name on our
race day t shirts please let us know. WE need donations for goody
bags to hand out to the racers! Please pass around this
information so we can get as much support as possible for such a
great facility.
If you are interested please email [email protected] or
[email protected] and they can help you with all of your
questions. We look forward to seeing everyone on race day!
Location: The Legacy Complex: 4289-4301 N. Danville Dr., Abilene,
Texas 7960
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5
Free Webinar: A Parent's Guide to Assessment, Part
2
Tuesday, March 19th 12:00-1:00pm CST
Presented by Claire Schutte, PsyD, BCBA-D,
Psychologist at the Johnson Center
Part 2: My Child Has Been Evaluated, Now What?
Putting Results in Motion
Assessment results, as well as how to use ongoing assessment to guide treatment planning
and implementation. Understanding common
assessment scores, the importance of
individualized treatment recommendations, and
measuring progress will be covered. This
webinar is about how to better understand
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Positive Behavior Interventions
Workshop Description: Having a Behavior Plan for your
child does NOT mean they are a “bad kid” or that you are a
bad parent!
Behavior is a form of communication and when a child acts
out, they are trying to tell you something or get a need met.
Learn how to turn that unwanted behavior around, both at
home and at school. By working together, parents and
teachers can redirect children so their needs are met in a
more socially acceptable way.
March 20, 2013 - 6:30pm
Workshop presented by: Kerry Steiner, PEN Project
Location: West Texas Rehab Center, 4601 Hartford St.,
Abilene,
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REACH for A Difference
Fundraiser Recital
A recital featuring the members of ACU's Mu Phi
Epsilon
to help raise money for REACH for a Difference.
March 21 at 7:30 pm
The Recital Hall of the Williams Performing Arts
Center - ACU Campus
Admission is free - donations are welcome!
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*Upcoming events for high school
students!
Capernaum - Young Life
St. Paul Presbyterian Church from
6:00 - 7:30 pm.
March 26, April 19&23, & May 7
9
th
Organization for Autism Research
Join the RUN FOR AUTISM for its’
inaugural RUN FOR SCHOLARSHIPS
Satellite 5K, to mark April’s Autism
Awareness Month - $30 entry fee
Monday, April 01 - to - Tuesday, April 30,
2013
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Saturday, April 6, 2013, 9:00am
Charity Golf Tournament benefiting Local Autism
Related Charities in the Big Country
- Entry fee: $75 Per Player/$300 Per Team -
1st,2nd,3rd place Payouts
Longest Drive
Closest to Pin
Hole in One Competition
Putting Contest
Maxwell Golf Course, 1002 S. 32nd Street, Abilene, Texas 79602
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The
*
HSU Friendship
Academy
LEARN STRATEGIES AND SKILLS FOR
MAKING FRIENDS
For Kids in
Grades 3 to 6
KEEPING FRIENDS
AND
ENJOYING FRIENDS
The Friendship Club
Thursdays 5:30-6:30
From February 14th to March 28th*
HSU – Abilene Hall - 2nd floor
*We will not meet on March 14th
This free program is sponsored by the Family Psychology Center at Hardin-Simmons University.
However, donations will be accepted if any of the parents would like to help with the cost of supplies.
For registration or more information: go to https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/hsufriendshipacademySP13
Or call 325-670-1531
Leaders: Graduate interns in the HSU Family Psychology Program will work the students in both large and small
group activities. The students will be working under the supervision of Lori Copeland, Ph.D. ,LPC.
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Sun Apr 21, 2013
Pinkalicious, The Musical
Pinkalicious can’t stop eating pink cupcakes despite warnings from her parents. Her pink
indulgence lands her at the doctor’s office with Pinkititis, an affliction that turns her pink
from head to toe – a dream come true for this pink loving enthusiast. But when her hue
goes too far, only Pinkalicious can figure out a way to get out of this predicament.
Pinkalicious, The Musical, has been performed continuously Off Broadway in New York
City for more than six years, and also has toured nationally. The one hour musical is
based on the popular children’s book PINKALICIOUS by Elizabeth Kann and Victoria Kann.
All shows are performed on Sunday afternoons at 2 p.m. at the historic Paramount
Theatre in downtown Abilene (352 Cypress).
ThunderTix Online Ticketing. Contact 325-677-1161 for questions about Tickets.
Sun Apr 21, 2013 - Pinkalicious, The Musical Pinkalicious can’t stop eating pink cupcakes
despite warnings from her parents. Her pink indulgence lands her at the doctor’s office
with Pinkititis, an affliction that turns her pink from head to toe – a dream come true for
this pink loving enthusiast. But when her hue goes too far, only Pinkalicious can figure out
a way to get out of this predicament. Pinkalicious, The Musical, has been performed
continuously Off Broadway in New York City for more than six years, and also has toured
nationally. The one hour musical is based on the popular children’s book PINKALICIOUS
by Elizabeth Kann and Victoria Kann.
All shows are performed on Sunday afternoons at 2 p.m. at the historic Paramount
Theatre in downtown Abilene (352 Cypress).
ThunderTix Online Ticketing. Contact 325-677-1161 for questions about Tickets.
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2ND ANNUAL ‘SWING 4 AUTISM GOLF
OUTING COMING TO MAXWELL GOLF
COURSE APRIL 6TH
By Dave Wheaton3 days ago
Getty
Images, Michael Cohen
A growing number of children are being diagnosed with autism and autism spectrum disorder (ASD). The last figure I heard was
that 1 out of 110 children is diagnosed with ASD. With more and more children being identified to have this neurological
disorder, the need for additional research, education and other resources becomes more and more necessary. There are a lot of
ways you can show support for autistic people and their families, including participating in the 2nd annual ‘Swing 4 Autism’ Golf
Outing, coming April 6th at Maxwell Golf Course in Abilene.
‘Swing 4 Autism’ is an event to raise money for awareness and research for those affected by ASD, to provide education,
research, resources and support to improve the quality of life for those with ASD. It is organized by the West Texas Autism
Center and Abilene-based REACH for a Difference, and is sponsored in part by H-E-B.
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Information
Entry Fee
$75.00 for single golfer entry; $300.00 for a foursome
Entry fee includes
Driving range privileges
Lunch at the turn
Outing souvenir
Refreshments delivered on the course
Closest to the pin awards
Longest drive awards, and more
Date and Time
Saturday, April 6th
Registration begins at 7:00am, Shotgun start at 9:00am
Location
Maxwell Golf Course
1002 South 32nd Street
Abilene, TX 79602
(325) 692-2737
Individual and Corporate Sponsorship Opportunities
Cart Sponsor: $50.00
Tee Box Sponsor: $100.00
Hole-In-One Sponsor: $1,000.00
Silver Sponsor: $1,500.00
Gold Sponsor: $2,500.00
Diamond Sponsor: $5,000.00
Local autism and ASD support and resources
Reach for a Difference
Abilene, TX
Phone: Sara Collins, (325) 733-8346
Paul Ammons, PhD., (325) 201-0121
Shelby L. Weatherford, M.MFT., (325) 669-7777
Website: www.ReachForADifference.org
Facebook: Facebook.com/reachforadifference
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West Texas Autism Center
Located in the Pediatric Department at
West Texas Rehabilitation Center
4601 Hartford
Abilene, TX 79605
Phone: (325) 793-5497
Website: www.WTAutism.com
Facebook: Facebook.com/WestTexasAutismCenter
Email: [email protected]
Autism and ASD awareness are important to me, personally. I have a niece, Hayley, and a nephew, Matt, both with ASD. They
are both sweet, kind and wonderful kids who have benefited from early diagnosis of their conditions. They’ve also been fortunate
to have great parents who have taken advantage of terrific research, education and access to the proper therapy. Events like
the ‘Swing 4 Autism’ helps fund all of these resources, as well as support groups and outreach programs. If you’re a golfer, you
should get signed up. If you’re not, consider making a contribution to help make a difference in the lives of children with ASD
and their families.
Hayley, Age 11
Facebook, Gregory Wheaton
Matt, Age 8
Facebook, Gregory Wheaton
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My Pledge to My Children
http://baconandjuiceboxes.blogspot.com/2013/03/my-pledge-to-my-children.html
I won't... demand perfection.
I will... demand your best effort.
I won't... excuse your misbehavior.
I will... defend and advocate for you until my last breath.
I won't... abandon or ignore you in rough times.
I will... give you room to succeed or fail on your own.
I won't... fight every battle for you.
I will... always have your back.
I won't... tell you how to live.
I will... offer advice and guidance.
I won't... hold a grudge when you ignore my advice.
I will... be there to comfort you when you learn a tough lesson.
I won't... always agree with your choices.
I will... honor the choices you make.
I won't... always have the right answers.
I will... help you find your way.
I won't... ever stop loving you.
I will... try to not smother you with my love.
Daddy Loves You!
Posted by Jerry Turning at 7:56 AM
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II.
Bobby,
You were an unplanned for, unexpected gift and were born 9 days before your dad's and my first
anniversary. The pregnancy was hard, the delivery even harder, and the first week of your life scary since
I ended back up in the hospital with an infection. I missed you so that it's no surprise that I was reluctant
to ever put you down, and until you grew too big at age 7 to carry on my hip, that is exactly what I did:
carry you close to my body.
We were insulated from realizing you were different than other babies; you were our first, we didn't get
out much, and you were the first grandchild. We knew you weren't an easy baby, but you were so loved
that we didn't mind keeping you in our arms all the time.
By the time you were four, though, we were forced to realize you were, in fact, very different, and the
labeling attempts began; the therapies began, and of course, the fear began. The professionals we
consulted to get help for you did far more harm than good and we learned a healthy distrust of
psychologists, enough so that when you were much older I went back to school to get my master's in it so
I could come to battle for you and your sisters fully armed.
It is weird how you were just Bobby before doctors, teachers, therapists began to tell us you were ODD,
ADD, bipolar, or PDD and then finally autistic. I'm just grateful that it didn't take us long to go back to
thinking of you as just Bobby again. I'm beyond grateful that when I forget for a moment, like I must each
year when it's paperwork time, that you remind me again that you are you: Bobby, and that this is good
and enough.
You taught me patience. I will always be in your debt for that and for making me the teacher I am today.
You taught me that we all learn at our own pace, in our own time and that one's worth and value were
separate from some arbitrary number on a piece of paper. That's perhaps made me a more lenient college
instructor than most, but I think that's a good thing: I realized that as long as goals were met by the end of
the course that I could and can tailor assignment due dates and teaching methods to specific student needs.
You also taught me that 18 is just a number that growth and development don't cease at the arbitrary
threshold of adulthood. You taught me to never close the door on you and your sisters.
Lily,
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You came when we had given up hope of having another child of our own. And then you came five weeks
too early and terrified us as we raced two hours to the hospital you were taken to by ambulance, so that
you could be intubated and given surfactant replacement therapy. For nine days, you stayed in the NICU
and we prayed and cried and worried. And then we brought you home, this tiny little thing. And now look
at you. You are sparkly, loud, vibrant, giggly, and so smart. You spend hours drawing with Rosie, making
your own paper dolls. You love Spongebob, anime, Futurama and the Cat Warriors books. You delight in
idioms and trying to work them out. And you delight in correcting things that are incorrect. You would
make a hell of an English teacher, and boy would your students’ perfect grammar. You'd make them. You
have not let your issues stop you or hold you back and I love that you are still intent on skipping sixth
grade and moving right on to college because even though it will be harder, at least you get to choose
what you take. Smart doesn't even begin to cover who you are. You are Lily.
Rosie,
You are, my sweet flower, the first baby your daddy and I ever planned on having. We were figuring it
would take some time, but no, you surprised us and nine months after we started trying to have a third, we
were having you.
You are my wide-eyed baby, my dreamy child with a faraway look. You are my mischief maker and my
surprise. You are sweet and sarcastic at the same time and bluntly honest. You will suffer no fools ever.
You are on the outskirts so much of the time out there in the world, the quiet onlooker, soaking everything
in and forgetting nothing. You are my most obviously affected child, with stims that often draw attention
and with sensory issues that impact your ability to interact with the world. You hate loud noises, but have
learned to advocate for yourself at school out of necessity. I'm so proud that you found your voice and
started using it.
All three of you have made my life so much richer than I could have ever imagined. You fill me with
equal parts joy and laughter and bemusement, a combination I have learned to embrace; even that little
frisson of fear that underlies it all.
Will the world see all three of you as the wonderful, incredible young people you are? We've been blessed
that each of you has found your niche, found people who love you, look out for you and delight in you.
You are generous people, kind and helpful. You hate injustice of any kind and are ready to go to battle
over those injustices. You have a fierce sense of right and wrong, and you will and do stand up and speak
up. I am honored to be there with you, watching and loving you.
You will change the world. You already do.
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III. Dear HunterYour dad and I wanted to write this letter to you to let you know how much we love you and just what
this adventure we have been on has meant to us. We all knew you would be keeping us on our toes from
the moment we knew you would be coming into our lives. In August of 2010 when I was placed on bed
rest and you wanted to make your grand appearance at 29 weeks it was very clear all eyes would
constantly be on you! On August 29, 2010 you entered this world at 7:47pm. You were born 6 weeks
early but soon proved a lot of doctors and nurses wrong. You spent two weeks in the NICU and after
mastering the art of suck, swallow and breathing along with how to breathe all on your own you were
allowed to go home.
The first year was full of ups and downs. However for each down you hit it was always followed by
some amazing ups. Even if those downs meant being stuck in the hospital you would always bounce back
ready to fight! It was around the time you were 9 months when Aunt Jordan mentioned that something
might not be right. I knew she had good intention and I began to pay more attention to your development.
At the time your dad and I knew you had lots of problems with your ears and had tubes put in so we
figured this would do the trick. After two rounds of tubes we soon realized it wasn’t your ears. We started
to notice things with your speech just didn’t meet were you should be developmentally even for a
premature baby. You had so few words and the words you did have suddenly became less and less.
I still to this day can recall sitting in our first pediatricians’ office expressing my concerns. The horrible
meltdowns (she said welcome to the terrible two’s early!) When I mentioned your speech and how it was
not typical it was dismissed until you turned 18 months and then from there she said we would reevaluate.
I left feeling so frustrated and that maybe I was losing my mind. This happened in February of 2011. In
April we would attend your big sister Ella’s birthday party. It was supposed to be a fun filled exciting day
which turned into one of the most heart breaking saddest days. It was the day that it hit me and your Aunt
Jordan will tell me that it was time to push for further answers. I spend the three hour drive back to
Abilene in a daze and so sad. I then felt guilty because what did I do? What should I have done more at
that last appointment to make them see I was not crazy and that we needed to do something?
A few weeks later we met with your new pediatrician. A month earlier we had set up your 18 month
checkup so we would be bringing all this up at the appointment. That day a huge weight began to lift off
of us. Not only did we get referred to a pulmonologist we also got our referral for Speech and OT through
WTRC and we would get ECI on board to do their own evaluation with you. I discussed the behavior
issues and the things we had noticed that just didn’t seem right. She wanted to get us through these
evaluations and meet back with us to see if there had been any changes. Not two weeks later we would
end up back in her office begging for help in tears as you screamed and flopped on the floor. This would
begin our quest for your official diagnosis.
Hunter each day you have amazed us. Despite odds given you blow them out of the park. Each day
watching you learn and improve makes us so proud of you. You are not PDD-NOS, Sensory Processing
Disorder and Severe Speech Delay. You are Hunter Tyler Thomas and you are showing PDD-NOS, SPD
and SSD who is boss! You will not let these things define who you are. You are who you are no matter
what any doctor diagnosis’s you with. You have come so far in the last 10months it has impressed us all.
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So much so some days I think all of this in our heads and that you are just a typical toddler and all is well.
Then there are those days reality hits and we just have to do everything we can to make it through the day.
Each day that we watch you at therapy you can see the hard work you put into this. We can see the
improvements at each session. To hear you speak now and actually understand what you are saying is
amazing. To think a year earlier this was something that you were not capable of. Every time I see you
push and surpass the goals I know that it’s my motivation to do all I can to give you every opportunity in
this world! There have been countless nights I have sat up and researched all I could on ways to help and
how to make life easier on you. So far I think we have seen a lot of progress.
All we want from you H is to be happy. We want to see you thrive and be a productive member of
society. We know that you are a hard worker and like to defy all odds. I am a Longhorn and your father is
an Aggie we joke often that when the time comes you will not be going to either school but in fact attend
any school that is our rival. I think we have figured we should buy our OU stuff because, like the person
you are it will be anything to go against the grain! No matter what school or route you choose we will
support you.
At the end of last year you began a new therapy that we are so proud to be a part of. To see you every
Saturday up on a horse is simply amazing. To hear all the people out there say how much progress you
have made in that time is so awesome to hear. You have learned so much not just riding but how to walk
with the horse, brush the horse, how to get your gear and put it away. The look in your eye when you are
up on that horse is unexplainable. You are in your own world at peace soaking in all the things around
you. To add that with your OT, PT and Speech just shows us that all these things can and will help. We
have had our struggles and not every session has been ideal but we get through it and know what works
and doesn’t work for the next go round.
Tonight as we write this letter I see clearly with the good comes the well not so good. This week has been
a huge struggle for you and I know your dad and I hate to see you like this. It is nights like this that we
look at each other and say “when is the next therapy session? It’s not that we can’t do it but we know that
this is part of your routine and you need this. It is something that will help you more than we can at home
sometimes. I have no idea what we would do without all those people.
So Hunter as we end this letter we just want to say to you that we love you so much. We are so proud of
how far you have come, the hurdles you have jumped over and all the people you have proved wrong. So
now is your time to show everyone that while you might be diagnosed with these disorders they are just a
diagnosis not who you are. Who you are, is a bright, smart, talented, train loving, car collecting,
firefighter enthusiast, entertaining little guy who is going to go far in life. Never stop because you can’t do
it, only stop because you have done it all! Just remember we stand behind you including your siblings
Sean, Hannah, and Ella. They love you and are so proud to have you as their little brother.
With all our love,Mom, Dad, Sean, Hannah and Ella
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IV. To my darling daughter,
The day you were born was the happiest day of my life. That hot day in August I was blessed to meet my special
little girl. The first time I was able to hold you was so magical. You looked straight into my eyes and that moment
I knew we would always have a special bond. You had a full head of hair, the prettiest blue eyes I had ever seen,
with rosie cheeks and a cute button nose. This was the start of a new chapter in our lives.
I love spending time with you every day. My favorite is when you start to laugh. Your laugh is so contagious and
warms my heart. I enjoy spending hours on the floor putting puzzles together. I enjoy looking at all the drawings
you made on the refrigerator. You are such a great artist and so smart. I think it is awesome that you can name all
the animals at the zoo and know what they eat. It also amazes me that you know almost every dinosaur! You are
such a gifted little girl and mommy and daddy are so proud of you.
Amazing, that is what you are. You have overcome many obstacles in life and we are excited to see what the
future will hold for you. I know you will do great things in this world. You are a strong and very persistent precise
little girl and you strive to get it done right. This is a great quality to have and I love that you are independent.
I wish you great happiness in life. Just know whatever you become in life, I will always love you. I will always be
your rock and you can count on mom anytime. I love you so much and I am proud to have you as my daughter.
Love always,
Mamma
V. My Dearest Bean,
I will start this letter by saying thank you for giving me the life of a young mother one more time. I have
loved two daughters before you, and I love them still, but they are grown up now. I didn't expect to get to
raise another little girl, but God surprised me and blessed me with you.
When I heard of your upcoming birth, I first had to grieve for the little girl who was to give birth to you my younger daughter, then age 17. I am thankful that the grief of losing that little girl quickly turned to
anticipation of your birth. I helped with gathering diapers, bottles, clothes, toys, and furniture. I was
happy that my daughter and granddaughter were going to live with me in my home, where I knew I could
keep you both safe and provide extra support until your mother could become self-supporting.
When you were born, it took a long time for you to show any signs of life. I watched your blue, lifeless
body for some minutes after your birth, wondering if it was just my imagination, or if it was taking a long
time for you to breathe on your own. Then I saw the team of medical people take their places around you,
silently working to help you, and I knew that things were not right. I then began a conversation with God,
recounting how He had brought me from grief to joy, and begging Him not to leave me in grief again. I
also sent my thoughts to you, Bean, of how I had looked forward to having you with us and begging you
to breathe. After what seemed like a very long time, you took a breath!
After a few hours, your doctor noticed you were still having problems breathing, and he decided to send
you to the NICU in a larger hospital in Abilene. It was determined that you had been born with a stomach
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ulcer caused by health problems your mother had while she was pregnant. After a 10 day stay, you were
released to come home with us at last!
When you were 18 months old, I assumed the role of full time mother to you. Your birth mother - my
beloved younger daughter - was just not mature enough to handle the responsibility of motherhood. I had
been in a long-term relationship for about 15 years at that time, and my significant other and I had what,
to us, was an odd conversation about getting married "for the sake of our baby". He said, "Wouldn't that
be something - to have to get married at age 53?" We decided that our current status would be fine. So the
man you now call "Bpa" or "my dad" still lives two blocks away, and we are still not married. By the time
I took full time responsibility for you, Bpa had fallen in love with you, too, and this made the transition
easy.
I began to notice that your interactions with me were not the same as the ones I remembered having with
my first two children. You were verbal, but the back and forth communication with me was absent or just
very different. I knew all along that there was intelligence within you, but I didn't know if anyone else
would ever be able to perceive it. At day care, you walked the perimeter of the fence and did not interact
with the other children. At home, you liked to watch videos and would repeat conversations from them.
When I would ask you a question or try to interact with you, you did not answer and seemed uninterested
in relating to me. You didn't particularly enjoy hugs. Yet there was the time when I had written the
amount of a bill on my hand, and you excitedly pointed and called out all the numbers correctly. You did
the same with letters, pointing and labeling them correctly before the age of 2.
Bpa and I discovered that riding in the car was a good way to get our baby (you!) to sleep, while giving us
a chance to talk. Every night we would load you into your car seat and ride around town while you went
to sleep. One of the nights, you pointed to the sky and said something that sounded like "crescent". While
Bpa and I were still in doubt about what we had heard, you pointed to the moon and again said "crescent".
I looked at the moon and saw that it was indeed a crescent moon!
There were many other times your intelligence shone through just as brightly as that crescent moon. I
asked if you wanted some eggs one morning, and you said, "Eggs Y Z!" Then you saw some big satellite
dishes and labeled them "cymbals". You had words, but you had a very quirky way of using them! Your
sense of direction was always better than mine. With one of your quirky words, you would tell me our
location.
There were times that the lack of reciprocal communication sent you into what I came to know as
"meltdowns". Yours were so bad that you would cause yourself to have nosebleeds. I enlisted the aid of
our local ECI (Early Childhood Intervention) ladies, and they tested you and sent a speech therapist to
help. Sometimes she saw you at day care, and sometimes she came to our home. When you were 4, you
qualified for Head Start, where the speech therapy continued and the classroom routine provided more
support for you. Also at the age of 4, you were diagnosed by a specialist as having PDD/NOS - pervasive
developmental disorder, not otherwise specified. The doctor said at that time that she would not diagnose
"Aspergers" until you were around the age of 8. At the time you began Head Start, the testing showed that
you were about a year behind in language. You went through a phase of echoing, not answering,
questions. Then one day, you answered a question, and I knew you were on your way to true
communication! You were almost 5.
You loved pigs. You would not leave the house without a little hard plastic pig. I made many trips to
Tractor Supply to buy replacement pigs when you lost one. I know some would say I spoiled you, but I
was trying to prevent a meltdown. Besides, I decided I could be a grandmother and spoil you sometimes,
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even though I was your mother, too. You ended up with quite a collection of pigs.
After a few years of pigs, you fell in love with Frosty the Snowman. You had videos, CDs, stuffed
Frosties, plastic Frosties, and clothes with Frosty's picture. You wanted to marry Frosty, you said. I
mentioned one time that Frosty was married to a snow woman named Crystal, and asked what happened
to her. You said, "She melt!!" Now at age 8, you are in love with Sonic the Hedgehog. You love video
games and are quite the expert at playing Sonic the Hedgehog games. Your fantasies about Frosty and
Sonic have kept me entertained for hours on end!
As for your language development, during first grade, you were tested again and found to have no
academic deficiencies. I saw evidence of your progress, not just in the testing, but in everyday situations
as well. Your social development seems to be on track, also. You no longer walk the perimeter of the
playground by yourself, but you are in the middle of the group of children playing. You are in your third
year of dance lessons, and you are a wonderful little dancer. You have also been participating in Tae
Kwon Do classes for about a year, and you are doing wonderfully well with those, too. I believe the
structure and discipline of dance and Tae Kwon Do have helped you tremendously.
It is time for us to revisit the doctor who diagnosed the PDD/NOS four years ago. We will see her soon. I
know she will be surprised and amazed at your progress! Whatever the diagnosis ends up to be, I know I
am enjoying being your mom. I feel young, even if I'm not. I may yet have that Lifestyle Lift you saw on
the tv ad and recommended I get! I give myself an A as your mom, with the exception of organization,
and I apologize for my lack thereof. I have a goal of improvement, and I am making progress. Maybe we
can learn organization together. Having goals at my age is a blessing, but the biggest blessing is you,
Bean. As I tell you every day, I will always love you, and I am so happy you are with me.
Love,
Mama
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