An Interview with Tahira Syed

“I find gossip about me mildly amusing and largely
flattering.”
An Interview with
Tahira Syed
by
Ally Adnan
The youngest child of celebrated songstress Malika Pukhraj, the lovely Tahira Syed
started her career in music when her mother forced her into a rigorous two year
1
training in classical music with Ustad Akhtar Hussain Khan. The reluctant young
singer was trained in the art of singing geet and ghazal by her mother. Ustad Nazar
Hussain completed Tahira’s musical training by helping her find and develop her
own unique voice. Influenced by both classical and folk music, Tahira sings in a
distinctive style that has enjoyed popularity for more than four decades. Known
both for her good looks and mellifluous voice, Syed is a person of immense
intelligence, with a remarkable facility in making conversation. In a comprehensive
interview for the Friday Times, she talks to Ally Adnan about music, life, family and
friends.
1.
It has been ten years since your mother, the celebrated vocalist, Malika
Pukhraj, passed away. How do you remember your mother?
I remember Mommy as a very exacting person and a perfectionist. She wanted
everyone in her family to do his very best and set high standards for herself and for
those she loved. One had to live up to her high standards to earn her respect.
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Singing, writing, cooking, embroidery and everything else that she undertook had
to be done to the best of her abilities; anything less than that was unacceptable.
She demanded perfection from everyone in her family and from people she cared
for.
It was my mother who forced me to take up singing. And even though learning to
singing and studying simultaneously was very difficult for me, I did it to please my
mother. She wanted me to do everything that she had done in her life and more.
As I struggled to accommodate both studies and music, simultaneously, into my
schedule, she added painting to the list of things she wanted me to do by asking
Ustad Allah Bux to be my teacher. Mommy’s ambitions for her children were
boundless.
2. That must have made your childhood very difficult.
Of course, it did. Living up to Mommy’s expectations was not easy. She demanded
a lot from all her children, particularly from me. I was both her daughter and her
student. I had to work hard to meet her expectations in both capacities. Mommy
did not believe in dishing out praise easily. Encouragement came in the form of
increased attention and expectations. The lack of appreciation and praise used to
bother me a great deal. I wanted warmth and affection. Mommy seemed unwilling,
and possibly unable, to give either.
3.
Malika was not a warm person. She maintained a distance and a studied
aloofness with even those whom she cared for….
Yes, she did. She was always a little aloof and distant. She did not believe in
demonstrations of love and affection. She had an air of mystery about her. As
children, we never knew her real feelings. Happiness, sadness, concerns, anxieties,
and contentment – she kept it all hidden. There were a few people with whom she
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shared her feelings but she never opened up to her family. We were not privy to
her secrets.
4.
Malika Pukhraj was known for controlling her temper and rarely, if ever, lost
her cool. Yet, people in show business, and in social circles, used to be afraid of her.
Why?
Mommy was a very reserved person. One could never tell what was going on in her
mind. I think that people were scared because they could never be sure of what
she was thinking and were unable to predict her reactions to what they did. They
were afraid of ruffling her feathers and provoking what seemed to be great anger
simmering beneath a cool surface. As a child, I was scared of my mother. In fact, I
was petrified of her even though she never lost her temper with me.
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5.
Your father, Syed Shabbir Hussain Shah, was an eminent scholar and the
author of Jhok Sayal (‫)جهوک سیال‬, a major literary work of Urdu language. You often
talk about your mother but rarely about your father. What was Shah Ji like?
My father was a very warm, emotional and caring person; compassionate and truly
soft-hearted. I remember him as an indulgent, warm and loving father. He used to
ask Mommy favors on our behalf and tried to shield us from Mommy’s disapproval
and anger. A truly gentle soul. I did not get to know him very well as a person
because he passed away when I was around fourteen years old. I was too young to
have fully understood him and his personality at that age.
6. As a child, did you know that he was a major literary figure?
To some extent, yes. Writers and poets used to visit our home frequently. I knew
that he was respected in literary circles. I was also aware that he was writing a
novel, and not nearly fast enough to make my mother happy. She used to task him
with writing a certain number of pages each day, and made sure that he complied.
When he passed away, Mommy decided to collect his published works. This
became a frantic exercise for her but she managed to get a hold of a lot of what
had been published. He had written mostly for the Urdu language journal Romaan
(‫)رومان‬. Mommy was able to locate a number of copies of Romaan’s past issues, a
lot of which featured Shah Ji’s short stories. I got to know him as a writer by reading
these works.
7. When did you first read Jhok Sayal?
The novel was published posthumously. I read it as soon as it came out. It is a great
book but has been out of print for a long time. One of my brothers is very keen on
getting it republished. Once we locate a copy, we will get it printed again.
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8.
Your mother came from a background that is not necessarily considered
respectable in Pakistan. People may be in awe of her past but disapprove of it
nonetheless. Did this bother you as a child?
I did not know much about my mother and her background as a child. She was a
very secretive person. I knew that she was employed in the court of Jammu and
that she had an inordinate amount of love for music. That was about it. Very few
magazines used to write about musicians and social media did not exist at the time;
so a lot of information about my mother was out of reach for me. It was much later,
when I started going to radio and television stations with her, that I started seeing
the respect she was accorded in the world of music. And I realized the full extent
of her stature and standing only after visiting India with her. She was treated like
royalty in the country. I only saw people respect Mommy. That, certainly, did not
bother me.
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9.
People love to socialize with singers and musicians, and count them amongst
their friends, but fail to give them genuine respect. Why?
This, unfortunately, is the sad truth about our society. We are afraid to embrace
what we believe is right due to long-held but archaic views and our prejudices.
Respectable Muslim women were not ‘supposed’ to dance and sing. This was
something for the Hindus to do. The stigma associated with dance and music was
amplified after partition. Women who practiced these arts came to be regarded as
nautch girls and, often, worse.
Even in my own home, my brothers disapproved of me singing professionally. They
had trouble coming to terms with their sister, the daughter of a Syed (direct
descendants of the Prophet Muhammad – Peace be Upon Him) family, performing
in public. They must have had a very hard time living down my mother’s reputation;
adding a singing sister to the picture was horrific for them. With me singing publicly,
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they were likely to become the subject of much talk and scorn and possibly lose
some friends. We had been raised in a conservative household. The sisters were
expected to vanish when friends of their brothers were over. When Mommy
started talking about me performing on radio and television, there was a lot of
resistance from my brothers who did not understand how their sister – one who
had never been allowed to meet their friends – could appear on television to be
seen by all. Mommy’s resolve, however, was strong and everyone gave in to her
decision to have me perform professionally.
Mommy, as always, got her way but became increasingly protective; she was afraid
that she would have to carry the entire blame if anything inappropriate, or
untoward, happened on radio and television. As a result, she watched me like a
hawk and always accompanied me to recordings. It was only after I got married,
that I was able to go to the television station alone.
10.
You were happily married in the eighties, with a handsome husband and two
lovely children. It was a picture perfect family. How did the marriage fall apart?
Marriages are complicated. It is difficult to determine how and why people drift
apart. I am not sure how it happened but Naeem and I ceased to care for each other
after living together happily for over a decade. Every relationship has its life; ours
was destined to be short. Over time, we lost interest in each other. I felt that Naeem
became indifferent to my presence. I think he felt the same way. We just ceased to
be in love.
11.
Was the divorce acrimonious?
No. Kiran was twelve at the time and Hasnain was four years old. The whole thing
took about two months. Both of us were determined to remain civil and courteous.
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The kids would have suffered a lot had we not behaved ourselves. We did not want
that.
12.
Do you and Naeem still see each other?
Very seldom. Every now and then, we see each other at weddings and social events.
We don’t meet otherwise.
13.
Did your mother support your divorce?
No. She was fond of Naeem and wanted us to stay together.
14.
And the children?
Kiran and Hasnain were very young at the time. They probably suffered a lot
through the process but did not have a say in the matter.
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15.
How come you never married again?
I have never really felt the need to marry again. I enjoy being single. I have
wonderful friends that I spend time with. I travel. I perform when I feel like singing.
I have freedom and I have independence. I come and go as I please. I enjoy spending
time with my children. I am very happy. I have met a few interesting men but
nothing has come out of those relationships. Marrying again has never seemed
attractive.
16.
In the thirty years that I have known you, I have always noticed how
confident you are and how you always seem to be at ease with yourself. Is your
composure studied or are you truly comfortable with who you are?
I developed confidence as I grew older. As I got to know more about myself, I
became comfortable with myself as a person. I think it was in my forties that I came
to be fully at ease with myself. I know my strengths and my weaknesses, and am
not afraid to admit my shortcomings and flaws. This makes me less vulnerable to
criticism. I do not have many secrets and talk openly and honestly about my life. By
doing so, I take away from the pleasure of people gossiping about me. I am a secure
person and do not need to be treated as a celebrity at parties. I really don’t feel the
need to prove anything to anyone. My composure is real. It came with age,
awareness and introspection.
17.
Why do your siblings refer to you as General Saab?
They call me General Saab because they always let me have my way and agree to
whatever I ask them to do. I am blessed with truly wonderful siblings. They adore
me. They are extremely nice to me. And they spoil me.
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I have four brothers and one sister. My eldest brother, Tariq, is a good eighteen
years senior to me. He is a mature and understanding person. He has always been
there for me and supported my career as a singer when others did not. His
daughters are like
my sisters. I am
very
close
to
them. Saifi Baji is
both a sister and
a mother to me.
She
is
an
incredibly warm
person and has
been there for
me
throughout
my
life.
My
brother, Tauqeer
lives near me. We
interact
with
each other on a
daily basis. His
wife is a very dear
friend of mine.
Tanveer used to
be in the army
and was awarded
the
Sitara-e-
Jurrat
(Star
of
Courage) during his service. He is full of fire and energy, and a constant source of
entertainment for all of us. Tasweer is the closest to me in age and more of a friend
than a brother. Wer are an interesting family. To be honest, we are all a little crazy.
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No one in my family is your average ‘normal’ person. Each one has his own
idiosyncrasies and quirks. This makes for a fun family. I love my family’s
eccentricities and am glad that no one is boring.
18.
Friendships seem to be very important to you.
Yes, they are. I am blessed with a large number of very warm, loving and interesting
friends. I relish my friendships. They tend to last very long. Some of my friends have
been in my life for decades. I am good at maintaining contact and cannot bear the
thought of losing a friend. Friendships are valuable. People generally stop making
friends as they grow older but it has been different for me. I continue to meet
people who are interesting and fascinating and, even at this point, I am able to
foster good friendships with them. I think that I have always been lucky with
friendships. I tend to attract people who are smarter, wiser and more talented than
I am. Their company brings me a lot of happiness, and adds to my knowledge and
experience.
19.
What do you look for in your friends?
I like people who respond to my love and affection, and who reciprocate my
warmth in kind. The entertainment value of a friendship is important to me. I like
people who have a good sense of humor. I do not like to be bored and am attracted
to people who are full of life and happiness. I value friends who stimulate me
intellectually. I have a very diverse set of friends, different socially, culturally,
intellectually and financially, but all have one thing in common: they are warm and
genuine people, and they accept me for who I am.
20.
What kind of people do you stay away from?
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I tend to stay from people who are insincere and two-faced. I dislike people whose
lives revolve around the accumulation of wealth. People who have an inordinate
amount of love for material things turn me off. I do not enjoy their company.
21.
You lost your best friend, Zareen Khalid, to cancer. How did you deal with the
loss?
Zareen’s friendship was the
most valuable one I have ever
had. It started when I was
fifteen and lasted for as long as
Zareen was alive. She was the
best
friend
anyone
could
possibly have. She was honest,
sincere and devoted. She had a
terrific sense of humor and
loved to entertain people. She
was an intelligent and talented
person. When she set up her
own business, she became a
pioneer in the field of event
management. It is impossible
for me to recount all her
kindnesses, her generosity, her
favors, and her unconditional
love for me; she did far too
much for me. Strong, supportive and wise, Zareen was always there for me, in good
times and in bad. Even when in the throes of cancer, she continued to be there for me.
She was very unwell during Kiran’s wedding but participated in the preparations with
the energy of a teenager. All arrangements for the wedding were done with her help
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and advice. Zareen passed away while I was in the United States. I have not been able
to get over the loss. I do not think I will ever come to terms with not having her in my
life any more.
22.
You have had your fair share of scandal during your career but you have
never come out to confirm or deny the rumors. Why do you not feel the need to
set the record straight?
I have heard a lot of rumors and gossip about me. I feel this comes with the territory.
I am a celebrity and people will talk about me. To be honest, I find gossip about me
mildly amusing and largely flattering. That people talk about me is a testimonial of my
status as a celebrity. It feels good, strangely. There really is no need for me to set the
record straight. People who are close to me, those who matter in my life, know the
truth. They do not need any clarifications or explanations. And I do not care much
about the rest.
23.
You had three teachers of music. Ustad Akhtar Hussain, your mother, Malika
Pukhraj, and Ustad Nazar Hussain. What did each one of you teach you?
Ustad Akhtar Hussain taught me classical music. He worked on pitch, tone and voice
culture. I learnt the basics of raag (musical scale) and taal (rhythmic cycle) from him
for a period of two years. Once the foundation of singing had been laid, Mommy
started teaching me geet and ghazal, using her own repertoire as the source of singing
material. She also helped me develop a regimen for riyaaz (practice). Nazar Saab help
me with voice modulation and refinement. He taught me raggi (singing using the
throat) techniques and helped add a softness and more feeling to my voice. He also
composed some wonderful geets and ghazals for me.
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24.
Virtually all major music directors of Pakistan have composed songs for you.
Who was it that you enjoyed working with the most?
Nisar Bazmi. He was
very talented and a
wonderful
human
being. I love every
single composition he
did for me. He had a
very gentle manner
and afforded me a
very safe and secure
environment to learn
his compositions. I
enjoyed working with
Bazmi Saab.
Khalil
Ahmed
composed a number
of very good songs for
me. Yeh Alam Shauq
Ka, Baadbaan Khulne
Se Pehle, Awal Shab
Wo Bazm Ki Raunaq,
and Jaanaan Jaanaan
were all composed by
Khalil
Ahmed.
Unfortunately, Khalil
Saab was surrounded by a number of senior music directors. As a result, his work
was always eclipsed. I do not think he ever received due respect. I love his
compositions. Some of my best songs were composed by Khalil Ahmed.
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25.
You tend to select very good poetry for your songs.
Yes, I prefer to sing the works of masters. Mommy understood poetry and did not
approve of singing mediocre verse. She was actively involved in the selection of
poetry for my songs, and deserves credit for the quality of poetry that I have sung.
I was always on very good terms with music directors like Arshad Mahmood, Nisar
Bazmi, Khalil Ahmed and television producers like Farrukh Bashir and Khawaja
Najam Ul Hassan. These people were my friends and indulged my desire to sing
good poetry.
26.
The few songs that you sang for films – Mere Dil Ki Har Tammana, Yeh Mehfil
Jo Aaj Saji Hai and Raat Nasheeli Hai – were huge hits, but you stopped singing for
films very early in your career. Why did you do so?
In those days, the word “film” had negative connotations and was considered shady
compared to radio and television. Girls from respectable families were not
supposed to move in film world. I remember that Mommy scheduled the recording
of my first film song for midnight to avoid being seen in the studio. My family
agreed to me singing on radio and television with great fear and apprehension. Film
was too scandalous for them to handle. I, therefore, decided not to sing for films.
27.
Was the film world really that scandalous?
No, not at all. It was as respectable as radio and television. The perception that
people in the film industry were less honorable than others was unfair and
unwarranted.
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28.
Did your parents have a lot of friends in the world of music?
Mommy commanded a lot of respect in the world of music. Ustads Amanat Ali Khan
and Fateh Ali Khan
used to visit our
home
regularly.
Shah Ji was very
fond
of
Ustad
Salamat Ali Khan
who used to come
and perform at our
home
regularly.
He used to burst
into
tears
each
time Salamat Ali
Khan sang a kafi.
Mommy was on
very good terms
with
Fareeda
[Khanum]
Aunty
and very close to
Madam
Jehan.
Noor
I
was
friends with Zille
Huma.
Mommy
and Noor Jehan
Aunty used to visit
each
other
frequently. They were close to each other.
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29.
And Madam Ji wanted you to marry her son, Asghar Rizvi, at one point in
time?
Yes, she did. It obviously did not happen.
30.
You managed to anger Madam Noor Jehan very famously in the eighties.
What was the altercation about?
It was a very unpleasant and, in my opinion, totally unnecessary fracas. A journalist
from an Urdu periodical interviewed me and asked me a few questions about
Madam. Once he had the answers he decided to play mischief and published a
headline stating that I had talked ill of Madam and said that I did not enjoy her
music and could not bear to listen to more than a couple of her songs at a time.
That was patently false. He had quoted me incorrectly and out of context. The
headline set Madam off. She reacted with tremendous fury and called a press
conference to denounce me both as a singer and as a person. The truth is that I
have always admired Madam’s singing. She was a friend of the family and there
would have been no reason at all for me to speak ill of her. I just wish that Madam
had asked me, or Mommy, for clarification before getting fired up.
31.
Malika Pukhraj wrote a very candid autobiography that was translated into
English and published in India. I remember her telling me that there were passages
in the original draft that her daughter, Tasneem Zehra, did not want published.
What were those passages?
Mommy wrote very candidly and with great honesty. Baji and I did not want her to
use real names in a few passages because that would have caused unnecessary hurt
and left her exposed to a defamation suit for libel. We asked her to remove the
names. Other than that, pretty much everything Mommy wrote was translated and
published as she had written it.
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32.
The songs that you sing are not the most popular ones today but you always
manage to draw large crowds to your concerts, especially outside of Pakistan. Why
do you think people flock to attend your shows?
I think it is nostalgia. People who come to my shows are typically middle-aged and
enjoy listening to songs they heard in their youth. I also tend to attract welleducated people because of the quality of poetry I sing. I have my own following of
intelligent, well-read and knowledgeable people but this will not last for very long.
Sadly, this is the last generation of people who will listen to and enjoy my songs.
Younger generations do not know Tahira Syed or her songs.
33.
Do you think that programs like Coke Studio help introduce traditional
Pakistani music to our youth?
Yes, I do.
34.
Have you been asked to perform in Coke Studio?
No, I have not. I am surprised that they have not approached me.
35.
Why do you sing?
I sing because I have a desire to be heard. When I was younger, singing did not
afford me a lot of pleasure. Now it does. I get a feeling of euphoria when a learned
audience appreciates my singing. I enjoy the satisfaction that comes with having
performed well.
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36.
You are one of the very few Pakistani singers who are able to perform live.
Do you do riyaz on a regular basis?
No. I practice for about two weeks before each performance. I use tapes of practice
music that I made a few years ago to get in shape for my performances. In addition
to riyaz, the hard work I put into singing as a young girl, especially with Ustad Akhtar
Hussain, helps me sing live. I had a proper and formal training in music. It continues
to pay dividends. I do not find it difficult to sing live.
37.
Where is it that you find the best audience?
In India and in the United States.
Indians are true lovers of music and musicians. They know how to value and respect
artists. I love performing in the country. Indian audiences do not care if you are a
Pakistani or an Indian. Their respect is based solely on merit. I am flattered by the
familiarity of the Indian have with my songs and love it when they ask me to sing
their favorite songs in concerts. I enjoy the love and the adulation I receive in India.
Audiences in the United States tend to be well-educated, knowledgeable and older.
As I had said earlier, they are drawn to my music because of nostalgia and the
quality of poetry I sing. American audiences include Pakistanis, Indian Muslims,
Sikhs, and a lot of other groups, all of whom seem to come together in my concerts.
They listen with a lot of love and attention and are very liberal with praise. I like
that. My shows in American tend to sell out very quickly.
38.
I have always noticed that you do not put on any airs and graces, and are
always willing to sing informally at parties and at weddings. Why?
I do not take myself or my singing too seriously. I loathe people who do. Having
talent, no matter how immense, does not grant one the license to act superior to
others. I like being friendly and approachable. I find people, who become legends
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in their own mind, offensive and delusional. I think I sing well but cannot be proud
of my accomplishments. A lot went into making me a singer and very little of it was
my own doing. I was born to mother who was a great vocalist. My family allowed
me to learn music. I had three good teachers. I found the right opportunities to
perform on radio and television. Music directors composed very good songs for me.
I had access to some of best Urdu poetry of all times. I cannot take credit for all of
this alone. It was just happenstance. My only contribution to my success as a singer
is the hard work that I put into singing begrudgingly. It would be wrong for me to
take all credit and start putting on airs.
39.
For almost four decades, you have managed to remain fashionable and chic
in the very fickle world of show business. How is it that you have managed to define
style and enjoy celebrity for such a long time?
I think that I have stayed popular for such a long time because there has always
been more to me than just music. I have a sound education. I come from a
respectable family. I believe I am reasonably intelligent. I am told that I have good
looks and good taste. I like to wear good clothes. I am well-traveled and well-read.
And, I believe, I have good manners. I think these factors, more than my credentials
as a singer, are behind my protracted tenure as a celebrity.
40.
What do you think are your best qualities as a person?
I am a loyal person. I am sincere and I don’t pretend to be someone I am not.
41.
What are your vices?
I am not a patient person. I get bored easily. I have a short temper.
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42.
What role do Kiran and Hasnain play in your life?
My children mean the world to me. Nothing is more important. I was a single parent
and paid a lot of attention both of them when they were growing up. The three of
us used to spend a lot of time together and enjoyed each other’s company. I made
sure that children had fun with me. This helped develop and extraordinary level
closeness between us.
Kiran loves me a great deal and is always looking for ways to take care of me. She
values my opinion and likes to seek my guidance and advice when making
important decisions. She is proud of me and would never let anyone say anything
disparaging about me. Kiran respects me not just as a mother but also a person.
This makes me very happy. When I am with her, I feel needed and cherished.
Hasnain and I have a different relationship. I find it very easy to confide in him. He
is wise beyond his years and completely non-judgmental. He has unconditional love
for me and will always stand up for me.
God has given me two of the most wonderful children in the world. That is my
greatest blessing.
Ally Adnan lives in Dallas where he works in the field of telecommunications. He can
be reached at [email protected].
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