How To Grow A Wicked Porn Stache
Transcription
How To Grow A Wicked Porn Stache
http://moneyaintfree.com/ How To Grow A Wicked Porn Stache Legal Notice:- This digital eBook is for informational purposes only. While every attempt has been made to verify the information provided in this report, neither the author, publisher nor the marketer assume any responsibility for errors or omissions. Any slights of people or organizations are unintentional and the development of this eBook is bona fide. The producer and marketer have no intention whatsoever to convey any idea affecting the reputation of any person or business enterprise. The trademarks, screen-shots, website links, products and services mentioned in this eBook are copyrighted by their respective owners. This eBook has been distributed with the understanding that we are not engaged in rendering technical, legal, medical, accounting or other professional advice. We do not give any kind of guarantee about the accuracy of information provided. In no event will the author and/or marketer be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, consequential or other loss or damage arising out of the use of the information in this document by any person, regardless of whether or not informed of the possibility of damages in advance. Thank you for your attention to this message. Brought To You By Simon The Scammer Visit Simon’s Website Here 1 http://moneyaintfree.com/ Intro Men have been sporting mustaches since prehistoric times. They have waxed and waned in popularity in every social class and in every culture. Many famous men wore mustaches from the very wise and referred Confucius and Buddha to Jesus Christ. Believe it or not, mustaches have never stopped being cool, it’s just like a lot of people aren’t cool enough to wear them. It hasn't been that long since the mustache was in vogue, but its last ascendance was probably in the 1980’s, when the advertising campaign "Where's The Beef??" was coined after an eager young marketing intern repeatedly heard this phrase from every woman he met in the summer of 1983. He failed to realize it was an unconscious response to the lack of new episodes in the offseason for Magnum P.I. While the '90s were more or less clean-shaven, the new millennium has been nothing if not hirsute. Scraggly beards have been de rigueur, especially among hoodiewearing collegiate types, for whom grooming has always been somewhat discretionary. But now it seems the hairy upper lip is making a come-back. Bushy beards have been the rage, Groomed stubble is so passé. Indie rock beards, old hat. These days, it's all about the mustache. 2 http://moneyaintfree.com/ Tom Selleck’s case point Give a man a Ferrari and he gets laid for a day. Teach a man how to grow Tom Selleck's mustache and he gets paid to get laid. Tom Selleck was originally cast to play the role of Michael Knight in the Knight Rider series. When he found out that his costar would be a Firebird instead of a Ferrarri, he promptly declined the role and then boned the producer's wife. Tom Selleck uses the discarded satin panties of his conquests as dinner napkins. The most effective form of birth control for men is not being Tom Selleck. The Magnum in Magnum P.I. represents Tom Selleck's favorite brand of condom. The P.I. stands for "Perpetually Insatiable". This, of course, refers to Tom's superhuman libido. Chuck Norris may kill people, but Tom Selleck has sex with their widows. Recent research indicates that global warming can be attributed solely to the effect of Tom Selleck's mustache on women. Tom Selleck's mustache is Victoria's Secret Last but not least, in case of emergency, Tom Selleck's mustache can be used as a flotation device. To sum it up, Tom Selleck has one sweet mustache! If you're a guy and you don't like Magnum P.I. then you better go to the backroom and make sure your balls are still in your pants you girly man as naked lips don’t drive Ferraris. 3 http://moneyaintfree.com/ Difficulty: Moderately Easy Instructions 1. Stop Shaving Your Upper Lip – Duh. Just let that area marinate. Give it plenty of sun, don’t scrub too hard with the face wash and avoid exposure to radioactive materials. 2. Let It Grow While Shaving Around It – You’re growing a mustache, not a beard. Make sure you keep your cheeks and chin clean. And the neck, too. No one likes a Neck beard. 3. Embrace the Mustache that Suits You – You’ll soon begin to notice that your mustache has a personality and certain natural aptitudes. If your mustache wants to curl around the lips, let it. If you have connectors that allow it to bridge the gap between lip and chin, congratulations, you’re Fu manchu material. Able to grow long hairs quickly? You may be able to go Handlebar. 4 http://moneyaintfree.com/ 4. Nurture Your Crops – Once you have a bountiful harvest on your upper lip, you must tend to the field. Get a mustache comb. Consider some mustache wax. Trim and maintain. You have a responsibility now. You’re no longer alone. You’re part of a team. Don’t be selfish. 5. Wipe – Seriously. You’re eating for two now. But your mustache will make an effort to hoard food and you cannot allow this. Wipe often with napkins. Wipe extra with tissues. Wipe like you have never wiped before. No one can see your dingle berries, but everyone will see that Boston creme. I hope you all feel better now that I’ve addressed these rudimentary issues and I also hope that you’ll go forth and grow staches of your own. Be that as it may, it is impossible to make your stache grow faster than your genes tell it to grow. Boosting your testosterone level with pills may help but good luck getting a scrip for that! Mustachely, 5