How to Thrive & Heal in the midst of Fibromyalgia
Transcription
How to Thrive & Heal in the midst of Fibromyalgia
How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia How to Thrive & Heal in the midst of Fibromyalgia 77 Tips to Make Your Life Easier and Happier A complementary approach using Alternative methods by Lynn I, Ward, M. Ed., EFT-CC Life & Energy Coach, Author & Speaker © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 1 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia That’s an audacious title, isn’t it? I know you are probably thinking, “This woman doesn’t know what she’s talking about! Thrive – when there are days I’m so tired and in pain I can barely put one foot in front of the other? Heal? I can’t imagine that!” I understand, because for years I could not have believed that, either! Let me tell you a little about myself. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia when I was about 42. (This diagnosis was confirmed by 7 or more rheumatologists including a team at Mayo Clinic.) For a long time I could not have written this. It was too fresh – too painful to remember. But when I stop and consider where I am in my life today – how good I feel – I realize that I need to share what I have learned and some techniques that have helped others.. I was tired all the time. The only times of day I was not in pain was that brief in-between sleep and waking up period and, sometimes, for a minute of so relaxing and visualizing light in the afternoon. I had to wear long sleeves to walk on the beach in the summer because the breeze hurt my skin. Sometimes I felt like my brain was foggy. Noises and cold really bothered me – getting cold could put me in agony for a week. I was scared to plan more than a day ahead because I never knew how I would be feeling. But these were all minor compared to not being able to hold my daughter on my lap without putting a pillow on my chest first because it hurt to have her little head against me. Fast forward to now: I am now 57 and have been symptom-free for 3 or 4 years. I work long hours getting my business established.. I feel good. I plan what I want when I want. I treasure life! In this report, I hope to help you deal with fibromyalgia. I want to give you hope – to let you know that healing is possible, and give you some specific tips that can help you at any stage of your process. One of the (many) keys to my healing was taking charge of my health – of my life. I remember standing and looking out my window at the inlet one day and the words, “I am so angry!” came tumbling out of my mouth. I was angry about the pain, about having my life disrupted, about feeling life was passing me by, about feeling so stuck! And I vowed that day to do and learn everything I could to get better. Because you are reading this, you are obviously committing to taking charge of your healing. Stay committed. Keep your faith. Laugh every day. You can feel better! Bless you on your journey of healing! I hope that these 77 Tips make your journey easier and faster. I am holding your healing in my heart! © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 2 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia How to Thrive & Heal in the midst of Fibromyalgia 77 Tips to Make Your Life Easier and Happier Body 1. Walk. Walk every other day to start with. Go a little further each day. For example, you might start with a block and back today – or a gentle mile, depending on your ability. Exercise 2. Make a game of looking for something special, of noticing beauty. You might look one day for leaves, or landscaping, flowers, the color red (or any color), cloud shapes, shades of white and gray in clouds, etc. 3. Listen to your favorite music, inspirational CD, a recording of your self-affirmations or your self pep-talk. 4. Yoga – I highly recommend yoga! But, you know your body, so either: do it gently, at your own pace, using a video, tape or book. (When I started, I used a well-illustrated book.) OR get an instructor who is gentle and understands your situation and who will not push you. Stop and rest when you need to. 5. Tai Chi can also be very helpful, but again you will want to talk with your instructor first. Stop and rest if you need to. (NOTE: Why do these help? They both give you flexibility and stamina, balance and focus. Both can help clear your mind and reduce or eliminate fibrofog.) 6. Swim, preferably in a heated pool if you are cold sensitive. 7. Doing water exercises, or even tai chi in water, can be fun and it gives you support. Remember that the water adds resistance, so take it slowly. © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 3 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia 8. An exercise routine that I found very helpful is the one in Ancient Secret of the Fountain of Youth a companion to the book by Peter Kelder. You start with only 3 repetitions of these yoga-like exercises and build to 21 over several weeks. Take it slowly and listen to your body. You will know when to progress to the next step. 9. Do the 3 Thumps • Cross your hands at the wrists, placing your middle fingers on the hollows an inch or two from center and below your collarbone. Tap 30 seconds or more while breathing slowly in through your nose and out through your mouth. • Tap your breastbone with the fingers of both hands for 30 seconds or more while breathing slowly in through your nose and out through your mouth. • Cross your arms and place fingertips on the hollow in your ribs a few inches below your nipples. Tap 30 seconds or more while breathing slowly in through your nose and out through your mouth. This is great for re-energizing yourself during the day. It also boosts your immune system, so doing it every day – and several times a day if you feel like you are coming down with something – will help keep you healthier. NOTE: If it hurts to tap, you can gently rub, or even hold, those points. 10. Homolateral Cross Crawl: do the 3 Thumps first. If you cannot do 3 sets of 15 each of these, start with 1 set of 3 – 5 and build up to more. © 2005 Lynn I. Ward • March in place, swinging your arms and raising your legs so your knees are parallel to the floor, using the following technique: • March raising the arm and leg on each side (right arm and leg, left arm and leg). This may feel awkward at first, but it gets easy. March in place 15 steps each side. 4 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia Then march using alternate leg/arm movements (like regular marching) for 15 steps each side. • Repeat each sequence two more times if possible. This is an excellent energizer and is reported to help lose those pounds that want to hang on by realigning your energy system. For maximum benefits, do the Three Thumps, the Homolateral Cross Crawl, and another set of Three Thumps, three times a day. It only takes a few minutes and is a more effective way to perk you up than a cup of coffee! But you determine what works best for you. The important thing is to be consistent, even if you are doing 3 repetitions at a time. 11. If your activities are severely limited, try chair aerobics or even visualization. Lie down and see yourself moving slowly, as in yoga, tai chi, walking or dancing. See yourself moving easily and flexibly. (Visualization has proven to be very effective with athletes, so use it to your own benefit!) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Breathe 12. Try “whoosh” breathing as recommended by Dr. Andrew Weil. It is good for reducing anxiety and getting more oxygen. (Note: Do not hold your breath if you have high blood pressure.) 1. Put the tip of your tongue on the bony ridge just behind your front teeth. 2. Exhale with a whoosh through your mouth. 3. Breathe in to the count of 4. 4. Hold for a count of 7. 5. Exhale with a whoosh to a count of 8. 6. Repeat 3 more times for a total of 4 breaths (for beginners). Build up to 8 breaths two times a day. 13. Abdominal breathing – this is a very simple technique that can be done anywhere. I use it with my coaching clients as it is very relaxing and centering. Sitting with your back straight and feet on the floor, place your hands across your abdomen with your fingertips barely touching. Inhale through your nose as your © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 5 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia abdomen expands and your fingers move apart. Exhale through your mouth, collapsing your abdomen until your fingers touch again. Inhalations and exhalations should be the same length. If you are having trouble seeing a big difference between inhalations and exhalations, try lying on your back and place a book on your abdomen, watching it rise and fall as you inhale and exhale. 14. Color Breathing – This has worked wonders for my daughter when she was tired and stressed before dance class. I use it to energize and find it very helpful before giving a speech or going into a difficult situation. 1. Visualize yourself breathing in red energy from deep within the earth ... up through the souls of your feet as you inhale. As you exhale, see the red energy flowing to every part of your body. (Do 3 times.) 2. Visualize breathing in orange energy just below your navel, and as you exhale see it flowing to every cell of your body. (Do 3 times.) 3. Visualize breathing yellow energy into your solar plexus, and as you exhale see it flowing to all of your body. (Do 3 times.) You can stop here, or continue color breathing 3 times in each area as follows: 4. Breathe green into your heart. 5. Breathe turquoise into your throat. 6. Breathe indigo blue or purple into the space between your eyebrows (your third eye). 7. Breathe purple or white light energy into the top/crown of your head. 15. Breathe into your pain or tension. You can do this anywhere, anytime. Simply get comfortable, focus on where you hurt or are tense, and breathe your favorite soft, healing color into the pain. As you exhale, release the tension and pain and visualize it leaving. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 6 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia 16. Massage therapy. Find a massage therapist who will work gently and who will believe in your healing. Someone who does structural work cranial-sacral work, and who has a good understanding of the body. Persist! Some times I was sore for a couple of days, but I could feel tensions releasing and my myofascial tissues releasing. MASSAGE THERAPY WAS WORTH EVERY MINUTE AND DOLLAR! Relaxation 17. Aromatherapy. Lavender can relax you (I use it when I’m stressed and at bedtime.) Grapefruit or other citrus scents are wonderful for lifting your spirits. Do some research to find what works for you. It’s simple and easy. 18. Progressive relaxation with light visualization. Lie down on your back with your neck and knees supported by pillows. Have soft music playing if you want. Breathe from your abdomen at a regular in and out rhythm. Once your breathing is easy, visualize a soft light going over and relaxing you: • see it relaxing your forehead • circle and relax your eyes • go down your nose • go around your mouth and across your jaws • relaxing your neck • go down each shoulder and arm, inside of the elbow, hand, each finger, then back up the outside or your arm • visualize the light relaxing your heart, lungs, stomach (feel it relaxing!), abdomen, your intestines • send light down the front of each leg, relaxing your hips, knees, ankles, feet, and each toe • bring the light up the soles of your feet and the back of your legs, relaxing every muscle, every joint • see the light coming back together at the base of your spine, and then coming up your spine, relaxing your back • let the light expand at your lower back and especially your shoulders, totally relaxing them • bring the light over your head, relaxing it • bring the light back to your forehead, relaxing it totally. Feel your face totally relaxed. © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 7 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia • • Energy techniques Breathe rhythmically, allowing your body to get used to this relaxation and committing it to bodymemory. Note: If you go to sleep, that’s okay. It’s wonderful if you don’t, but don’t worry if you do. 19. Light-breath relaxation: Lie down on your back with your neck and knees supported by pillows. Have soft music playing if you want. Breathe from your abdomen at a regular in and out rhythm. Once your breathing is easy, visualize yourself breathing in a soft, healing light (many people like pink, green, lavender, golden or white for their comforting, healing properties. See whichever you prefer or which you need. It may vary from day to day.) As you breathe in this light, you will often experience a floating sensation. [I used to do this in the afternoon. It was one of two times during the day when I was totally without pain. Even if this lasts for just a few moments, it gives your body and mind a rest and is a reminder of feeling well and healthy!] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 20. Use EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), a simple tapping procedure, for pain relief, stress relief, and relaxation. (EFT has been called a needle-free acupuncture.) Just as you would take medicine daily, you will want to do EFT daily for best results. Here is a brief explanation of the basics. If you would like more detailed information, email me at [email protected]. 1. The Set-up Point is a “sore spot” located about 3” below the collarbone and halfway to the shoulder. If this spot is too tender, you can use the Karate Chop point (the outside edge of your hand). 2. The tapping points most commonly used are: • the crown of your head • between the eyebrow and bridge of your nose • outside of your eye on the temple • under your eye • under your nose • on your chin, where it indents under your lip • under one side of your collarbone • under your arm © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 8 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia 3. Say the Set-Up Phrase while rubbing the Set-Up Point. Repeat it 3 times. It goes something like this: “Even though I have this (state the problem, such as pain in my right shoulder), I deeply and completely love and accept myself.” 4. Say a shortened version of the Set-Up Phrase while tapping approximately 5 to 10 times on each of the tapping points. It goes something like this: “This pain in my shoulder” (i.e. state the problem again. This focuses your mind on it, which helps ease the problem.). 5. Tap through the full sequence another time or two until the problem has eased. NOTE: If your Set-Up and Tapping Points are extremely tender, you can just hold them while focusing on the problem and statement. This seems to work well with people who have fibromyalgia. If you can focus well, it is also possible to visualize yourself tapping as you state the problem. Amazing, but it can still get results! 21. Re-energize yourself with this Aura Centering exercise from Gwenn Bonnell (http://www.tapintoheaven.com ). It is also perfect for those days you feel “scattered”. Heart Massage: (Center your aura from top to bottom.) • • © 2005 Lynn I. Ward Take your right hand, hold it over your heart in the center of your chest, and massage your heart in a circular clockwise motion. (Imagine a clock lying face up on your chest, and follow the direction of the clock as you massage.) While massaging, repeat three times, “I deeply and completely love and accept myself, even with all my problems and limitations.” 9 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia To get the aura centered front to back and left to right use the basic Unswitching Procedure. • Press a finger or two of one hand in your belly button. • Make a prong with the fingers of the other hand and tap on the collarbone points. Put your thumb on one collarbone point, and two or three fingertips on the othser collarbone point. Tap or massage these pointlong enough to take two or three deep breaths while continuing to hold your navel. Keep your fingers in your belly button, and tap on your chin under your lip with your fingertips while taking three deep breaths. With your fingers still in your navel, tap with your fingertips under your nose above your top lip, while taking three deep breaths. Now just hold the navel point and under your nose. As you inhale, imagine an energy fountain moving up the midline of your body. As you exhale, allow the fountain of energy to shower back to earth. Breathe in and out three times, and feel the energy! Your fingers are still in your navel. Hold the spots on the back of your head just above the indentation where the skull rests over the neck (about one and one-half to two inches to each side of the back midline). Put your thumb on one side of the back of your head, and your middle finger on the other side. Hold this pose for three deep breaths. Keep your chin tucked in and your head level. Now put the index and middle fingertips of one hand above the upper lip below your nose. Open your other hand flat and place it on your back just above your tailbone. Breathe energy up the spine, take three or four complete breaths, and relax. • • • • • 22. Chakra clearing. The charkas are part of your energy system. This is a simple technique for clearing them and getting your energy flowing better. (I do this every morning in the shower.) Here is the simple version: • • © 2005 Lynn I. Ward Place one hand on the base of your spine. With the other hand, you will make small circles going down on the right side and up on the left (i.e. 10 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia counter clockwise)a few inches (3 or so) from body in the following areas: • • • • • • • your in front of your pubic bone about halfway between your pubic bone and navel solar plexus (a few inches about your navel) Heart the base of your throat your forehead between your eyebrows (third eye) the top (crown) of your head NOTE: Do each circle 3 to 12 times, depending on how you feel. • Now make an equal number of clockwise circles in each of the areas. NOTE: You can combine this with the Color Breathing technique, which may be more energizing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Nutritrition & Supplements 23. Eat a wide variety and plenty of fruits and vegetables. Wash them well. Eat organically when possible. 24. Take good, easily absorbable supplements: Evening Primrose Oil (1200 to 1500 mgs. twice a day. This is also helpful with arthritis.) and a good quality multi-vitamin and 90 – 120 mgs. of CoQ10. 25. Avoid inflammatory foods. These might include wheat (especially white flour), milk and other dairy products, sugar, caffeine, alcohol, yeast, etc. When I followed a non-inflammatory diet recommend for those with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, I felt better, less achy and less fatigued. 26. Eat foods that keep your optimal pH balance. The diet for most of the population is acidic. It is healthier to have a diet that is more alkaline. This means you need to eat more fruits and vegetables and less meat, refined grains © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 11 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia and soft drinks. Eat natural foods and avoid chemical additives when possible. NOTE: I am offering these ideas to get you started – and because some of these helped me, but I am not a nutritionist. I recommend you research what you eat and the nutritional supplements you take. These are what fuel your body! The right foods energize you and heal you. It could be well worth your time and money to talk with a Nutritionist. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 27. Practice Gratitude! Every day, find things to be grateful for. My clients have wonderful results with keeping a Gratitude Journal by their beds and writing down things they are thankful for before they go to sleep. This is especially important when you feel least like doing it! To make it really effective, FEEL the gratitude. Gratitude is a whole body thing! Smile. Laugh. Feel it in your bones! Be thankful for little things. 28. Know your WHY and WHAT. Why are you here? What is your purpose? You are vitally important, and I want you to know just how important. Being clear about your WHY and WHAT helps give you a reason to get up in the mornings. My children gave me a reason to get out of bed! (My daughter was a toddler and my son a teenager when I first had fibromyalgia.) 29. Use healthy, empowering words and conversations. It is so important to notice your language. The more positive your words, the better you will feel. 30. Become aware of your limiting beliefs and start changing them. Do you sometimes think you’ll never feel better? (I know I did. It was hard to believe I could heal and be pain-free. Let me tell you a story. One day my massage therapist told me that I would get well and I would live without pain. I was hurting all over – how could I believe that??? He said, “That’s okay. You don’t have to believe it. I will believe it for you.” That is one of the most © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 12 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia tremendous gifts anyone ever gave me! Because I know it came true for me, I hold that belief for you.) A very powerful technique is to substitute affirmations and declarations for limiting beliefs. For example: when you think “I’ll never get better.” you can substitute: “I am healing every day.” or “My health is improving every day.” If this is difficult, consider this: Is it possible that it is possible? I guarantee you it is possible! So you can say, “It is possible that it is possible that I am getting better every day 31. Don’t hide behind fibromyalgia. It is easy to use it as an excuse – and very understandable. But you have a tremendous amount of courage. Use it! Face new challenges and opportunities. 32. Remember that you are you, you are not your health. Don’t become fibromyalgia! Some people become so identified with their problem or situation that they don’t want to heal. There are better ways to be identified, to get attention. You are a beautiful person, who just happens to have this problem. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Environment 33. Keep your physical environment upbeat and healing by using colors that are uplifting and healing. 34. Keep it neat, so you don’t waste energy looking for things or getting frustrated. Make it a neat oasis. 35. Get rid of (or change) things that depress you: old photos with negative memories, broken things, the stained sofa , etc. 36. Listen to music that you like. Music can be very healing. 37. Listen to inspirational CDs and programs. 38. Turn off the news! Especially before bedtime. Just as you are nourishing yourself with good foods, you want to nourish your mind and emotions with good thoughts, © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 13 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia images and feelings. Reading the news, where you control the sights and sounds, is much less disturbing. 39. Turn off the TV or change your viewing habits. If you are using TV for entertainment and you enjoy it, that is fine. If you are using TV as a crutch, to fill a void, or as a mind-numbing “drug”, then start making changes toward using that time to do things that uplift you, nourish you, excite you! 40. Tune out negative talk. Reduce the time you spend with complainers and negative people. Shield yourself from them. Here are two techniques that work for me: The Zip-up. • • • Rub the palms of your hands together. Then with your palm a couple of inches from your body, inhale deeply and move your hand straight up the middle of your body to your upper lip. Do this three times. The last time, imagine “locking” the top of the zipper. You might want to say affirmations while you do this, such as “I am safe.” “I am confident and centered.” The Shield • See yourself surrounded with a clear bubble. Light can come in easily and your love can pass out through it easily. But any negativity is stopped immediately and falls away or is transformed. 41. De-clutter! This one thing alone will make you feel better, lighter, freer! 42. Design (or hire professional help) a system that helps you stay organized. 43. Keep the areas where you spend the most time decluttered and attractive. Use baskets, boxes, etc. to keep things near you but organized. [I’ve discovered that keeping magazines and paperbacks in baskets is a good way to organize them and is attractive.] © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 14 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia 44. Surround yourself with beauty and things that make you feel good – things with pleasant memories, things that lift your spirits. 45. Do a Treasure Map. This is a visual reminder of what you are declaring for yourself – your lifestyle intention. Cut out pictures and words that do these two things: • • make you feel happy and inspired help pull you forward Collage these on poster board and put it where you’ll see it every day. 46. Write inspirational messages and affirmations and post them where you will read them often – on the mirror, in the bathroom, by your bed, on your computer, on your steering wheel, etc. 47. What do you see when you wake up in the morning? Before you go to bed? Pay special attention to making these areas beautiful and uplifting. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 48. Continue to learn new things! Getting in a rut can be as limiting as pain and fatigue. 49. Be creative! Do you want to paint, write, garden, etc. Do it! Figure out ways to make it fit you and your situation. [I am convinced that you can use your creativity for healing. Why? It gives voice to your innermost self. It is a spiritual connection. And, it is fun! Play!] 50. Play. Do things that are fun. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Spiritual & Personal © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 51. Be part of something bigger. Get involved and interested in helping others. What are you passionate about? Get involved at a level that is appropriate for you. 52. See your big picture. Keep your life in perspective. 15 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia 53. Live in balance. Work, play, time for yourself, time for others…..All these are important. 54. Learn to say “NO”. Learn to set your boundaries and say no to things that don’t bring you joy, peace, and satisfaction. 55. Learn to say “YES!”. Yes to new ideas, new friends, new opportunities. Quit limiting yourself out of fear of change. Saying “yes” can bring excitement back into your life! 56. Write out your life goals, or, if you prefer, 101 Life Dreams. Read your list at least once a month. 57. Connect with a higher power. Go to your source of strength, peace, inspiration and comfort. Keep your life in perspective in the Bigger Picture. 58. Journal every day. • • • Get rid of your aches, pains, complaints, feeling like a victim, etc. Feel sorry for yourself on paper and get it out of your system! Process things on paper. [I found out when I broke my right hand that I was at a loss for a few days. I felt like I couldn’t think! This is an important process!] write positive things: gratitudes, hopes, dreams, new insights, affirmations, declarations….. 50. Honor yourself – your thoughts and feelings. Know that you are valuable! 60. Look for the benefits and the lessons in every situation, and be thankful for them. 61. Treat yourself with love and compassion and understanding. Be gentle with what you can do. 63. Look at possibilities rather than limitations! We live in amazing times! 63. LAUGH every day! Increase your laughing time. Watch funny movies or shows. Listen to funny things © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 16 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia (NPR frequently has some shows that make me laugh!). Read funny things. Laugh! Out loud! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 64. Be a good friend. Listen. Let people know you care. Relationships 65. Stay connected with people. Reach out to others. With the Internet and telephone, you can connect with and develop friendships with people all over the world! 66. Don’t isolate yourself! 67. Have a network of supportive people, a support group, a Master Mind group. [A note of caution: a support group focused on fibromyalgia may not be the best for you! While it is wonderful to be around people who understand, you need to be careful that it doesn’t become a negative influence, where you gather to complain and share aches and pains and problems. It is more helpful to share solutions and inspiration.] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rest 68. Take naps! (It does seem best if naps are limited to 30 minutes or an hour. Too long a nap can make you feel foggy and de-energized the rest of the day.) 69. Sleep. If you are not sleeping well at night, get some medical help (traditional or alternative). I also use a couple of drops of lavender oil on my pillow. (This worked wonders at camp to quiet the giggling girls down at night.) Sleep is vital! Do you know you can take a very healthy person, disrupt their sleep over a few days, and they will develop many fibromyalgia type symptoms? 70. Do some gentle stretches before bedtime. This will relax you and help you sleep better. Do something new and share something of yourself © 2005 Lynn I. Ward ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 71. Write an eBook. Your experiences, insights, stories, lessons, humor, hobbies, etc. will be fun for you to write and just may help a lot of other people, too. An eBook is 17 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia the easiest way for you to get started and published and to share with others. 72. Start a Blog or forum. You can use this online resource to connect with others, to express yourself, to provide a place for dialogue. It can be fun or serious. You set the tone, the topics. 73. Start a new hobby – one you’ve been going to do “some day”. What have you been wanting to do, to create/ to collect? Well, some day is here! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ More Basics 74. Pamper yourself. Now, I’m not talking about overindulging yourself or having to have you and your situation be the center of attention. But, most people not only aren’t like that, but they go too far in the other direction! Pampering yourself sometimes (regularly) is part of practicing good self care. How can you expect to heal if you don’t take good care of yourself – and even spoil yourself occasionally? 75. Release the fear. When you feel afraid, do one of the breathing exercises, EFT, a relaxation technique, journal…. There are so many techniques to face it and to heal it. This is very important when you get better and then have a flareup. Know you will continue to get better. Flare-ups will get further apart. Hallelujah! 76. Use visualization to create the future you want. See yourself well! Feel yourself well. If this is difficult, try the following visualization: • • • • © 2005 Lynn I. Ward Get comfortable and relaxed, either lying down or sitting. See yourself sitting in a beautiful place. Just relax there, enjoying the scents, sounds, feelings and sights. Notice there is someone coming toward you. They are so far away you can’t tell who they are, but there is something familiar about them – something safe and comfortable. As this person gets closer to you, you feel a great joy of recognition! This is your Ideal Self. Sense the love s/he sends to you. The acceptance. 18 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia • • • Welcome this person and sit and talk with her/him. Ask your Ideal Self to show you or tell you what you need to know. Thank them! Say good-by, knowing that you can meet at any time. Write the answers you received. These might be in the form of words or sounds, a visual (symbol or picture), a knowing, a feeling. It can come in many different ways. (One person saw herself running again, and full of joy.) 77. Never give up! Believe in yourself. Commit to your good health. You are a magnificent person and you were created to be in perfect balanced health. Hold that image for yourself. I am also holding that image for you because I am living proof that it is possible! Happy Healing and may God Bless you! It is important to simplify your life. Give up your perfectionism. Figure out your priorities – what is really important, and let the rest go. Be grateful for the little things, and look for little things to be grateful for. The more thankful and appreciative you are, the more you will find to be thankful and appreciative for! I also want you to know something VERY IMPORTANT: You did not bring this upon yourself! Please do not carry around the guilt of “you create your own reality” in addition to everything else you are dealing with. Yes, you can create – or be a co-creator of your reality. This does not mean that you caused yourself to have Fibromyalgia. As you process this and look back on it, you will see ways that your thinking may have contributed to this. All this means is that you have the opportunity to look at self-limiting thinking and change it. Everybody, healthy or not, has this opportunity! Take what you find is true for you and let the rest go. DO NOT…DO NOT… DO NOT add guilt to your problems. If someone tells you that you created this, bless them in their insensitivity and warped thinking and go on your way. (You know that they would probably whine over a hangnail if it were happening to them, so don’t let them bother you!!!) Your job is to love yourself. Yes, you can use your co-creating ability. You use it by being pro-active. By programming your mind and attitude. By growing in your spirituality. By finding things every day to be thankful for. Every day is a choice, and the choice is to love yourself and love life. © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 19 How to THRIVE and HEAL in the midst of Fibromyalgia A special Thanks to: • Angela Treat Lyon for her EFT illustration. • Judith Westley, Carol Thwaite and Marcia O’Dell for their feedback and comments. • Glenn Gaffney, massage therapist extraordinaire, who was so instrumental in my healing.! • My therapist, Tim, and doctors who aided in my healing. And last, but never least, my children, Cameron and Cassidy, for whom this took a large part out of their childhood. And my ex-husband, Jon, on whom this also took a toll. I will always be grateful to the three of you for your love, support and patience. © 2005 Lynn I. Ward 20