A Snowball`s - Todd A. Price

A Snowball's
ChAnce
Tbere'stnorescience
to
a snowballthansyrup
and ice'
i,r
nowballfanswill defendtheirfavorite
with the ferocityusuallyreserved
for
sportsteamsand deities.Onehot
afternoon,threeintrepidOffBeafstaffers
setoff with a thirstfor knowledge
and
an unquenchable
hungerfor sugarto
understand
what inspires
suchdevotion.
Ourquestbeganat PandoraS
in Mid-City,
wheretherealwaysseemsto be a line.Our
favoriteherewasthe nectarcream,a supersweetflavorwith originsin the mythical
K&Bdrugstores.
Theicewassmootherin
the nectarcreamthan in the two non-cream
flavorswe tasted,whichwe alsonoticedat
otherstands.Creamflavorsarerefrigerated,
so we guessed
that the coldersyrupkeeps
the icesoft.
We alsotriedthe exotically
namedTigers
Blood,whichactuallytasteslikea cherry
Slurpee
sprinkled
with coconut.According
to SnoWizard,
whichmakesmachines
and
syrupsfor manystands,Tiger'sBloodisthe
twelfthmostpopularflavorlocally.
Nectar
doesn'tevenmakethe list.
Nextup wasSal's,a nearly50-year-old
standin the parkinglot of a Metairie
bank.
Likeall greatsnowballstands,Sal'sisthe
kind of placewherethe HappyDaysgang
mightgo aftera date.SalSflavorswere
vividand unique.Thecreamof chocolate
tastedlikea TootsieRoll,and I meanthat as
a compliment.
Thepeachtastedlikefruit.
Sugar,
though,wasthe mainflavorat Sal5,
wherethe snowballs
werethe sweetest
we
found.And someof the icehadhardoatches
that we couldn'tcrackwith our plastic
spoons.
We continued
to WilliambPlumStreet
Snowballs,
whichmanychampion
as
the city'sbest.PlumStreetusesa rickety
EisenmanS
machine
thatsounds
likea
lathegrindingmetal.lt makessomeof the
smoothest
icewe sampled.
We alsoliked
the substitution
of cupswith charmingly
impractical
Chinese
take-outpails,which
haveto be wrappedin plasticbagsto catch
drips.PlumStreetmakesitsown condensed
milk,so we ordereda squeeze
on another
nectarcreamsnowball.
We didn'tnotice
40 *
n u c u szr o o z
muchdrfference
from regularcondensed
milk,although
afternearlyninesnowballs
our
palates
wereperhaps
not at theirpeaks.
Nearing
theend,we descended
on the
Queenof the Ball,a newplaceon OakStreet.
Thequeenhasa few clevergimmicks
to
compete
with the classics.
Thecheeryshop,
with itsgirlyblackandpinkstripedd6cor,
specializes
in fruitstuffedsnowballs
anda
longlistof special
mixescarefully
annotated
in
a Meadcomposition
book.A weddingcakeflavoredsnowball
stuffedwith strawberries
wasthe winnerhere,althoughoneperson
grumbled
thatstuffedsnowballs
aren'treal
snowballs.
Evenour crew'scurmudgeon,
though,couldn'tdenyitsgoodtaste.
We endedourjourneyon theyellowline
at HansenS.
l'llconfess
thatl'm a fierce
partisan.
Hansen's
Althoughmyfaithwasn't
shaken,
l'lladmitnowthatothersnowball
standshavetheircharms.
HansenS
flavors.
though,arericherthanmost.Noonecan
touchthe tartness
of its lemonade
syrup.And
theancient,
noisymachine,
hand-built
bythe
lateErnest
Hansen,
stillmakessomeof the
softesticein town.
Afterour afternoonof snowballresearch,
I wonderedwhy the icebtexture,evenat
standsusingthesameSnoWizard
machine,
couldvaryso much.Eagerfor answers,
I visitedthe SnoWizard
factoryon River
Road-theNewOrleans
equivalent
of a trip
to WillaWonka's.
Evenin the parkinglot,a
sugary
smellfillstheair.Theshowroom
has
the original
machine
that George
J.Ortolano
builtin 1936for hisgrocery
storeon the
cornerof Magazine
andDelachaise.
Ronnie
Sciortino,
Ortolano's
nephewandthe current
headof SnoWizard,
showedme aroundthe
plant.
Why,I asked,do somesnowballstands
producebetterice?Notsurprisingly,
the
bladesmustbe sharp.Theice'stemperature
matters.Toocold,andthe icebecomes
dry
andwon't sticktogether.
Toowarm,andthe
icegetswet andballsup. Mostimportantly,
the operatormustpushthe iceagainstthe
bladeswith a slow,gentlepressure.
Too
muchforce,andthe machinecreates
coarse
ByToddA. Price
chunksinsteadof powderysnow,
Themachinehasbarelychangedsince
1936.Today,
whenso muchisautomated
andautomatic,
it'sgoodto knowthat a
snowballstillrequires
craft.
OTHER NEWS
GregSonnier,
the chefof the muchmissedGabrielle
restaurant,
bringshis
lustyLouisiana
foodto the ultra-refined
diningroomof theWindsor
CourtSGrill
Room...
ThroughLaborDay,$21getsyou
a three-course
Caribbean
lunchwith a
complimentary
mojitoat 7 on Fulton.
. . Joel
Dondis(LaPetiteGrocery
andSucr6)opened
Grandlsle,a seafood-centric
restaurant
in Harrah
s growingcomplex
on Fulton
Street...
TheEmeril
Lagasse
Foundation
gave$500,000to localyouthorganizations,
including
program
the NOCCAS
culinary
and
Edible
Schoolyard
at GreenCharter
School...
Li'lDizzy's
openeda secondlocationin
the CBD...LaSpiga,
the Marigny
s favorite
bakery,
closeditsdoors.
*
Grandlsle:575Convention
CenterBlvd..
520-8530.
GrillRoom:WindsorCourtHotel,300
GravierSt.,522-1992.
Hansen's
5no-Bliz:
4801Tchoupitoulas
St.,
8 9 1- 9 7 8 8 .
Li'I Dizzy's
Caf6at the Whitney:610
P o y d r aSst . , 2 1 2 - 5 6 5 6 .
PandoraS
Snowballs:
901N. Carrollton
Ave.
Queenof the Ball:8116 OakSt.,4305718
Sal's
Snowballs:
1823Metairie
Ave..
Metairie.
7 on Fulton:Riverfront
Hotel.701
Convention
CenterBlvd.,681-1034.
WilliambPlumStreetSnowballs:
1300
Burdette
St.,866-7996.
ToddA. Priceis includedin MichelleLovric's
Skewered!(ChicagoReviewPress),
a
collectionof euotesfrom the rudest food
reviewsever.
v',w'r,,.OFFBEAT.con
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