PAST_ISSUES_files/103 January 2010web

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2010
Happy Days are Here Again!
To say 2009 was a tough year for most on page 34. Also, join ION at the Dodge
people is an understatement. Fortunately, 2010 shows signs of hope and promise. The economy is improving, the stock
market is on the rise and houses are
slowly selling. One of the great things
about our country is that the economy is
cyclical. It will always bounce back. You
just have to be prepared for the down
turns, which many of us were not.
This year is very special milestone for
me. On January 1st, JMT Designs, Inc.
the parent company of ION Arizona,
celebrated 15 years in business! Like
marriage, a majority of new businesses
fail in the first five years. How have we
survived and even thrived? We have a
talented, loyal and hardworking staff
with shared committed to creativity and
design excellence. We hold ourselves
to a higher standard. As proof, we have
joined the Better Business Bureau, a
great organization of businesses with
a common goal of business ethics and
excellence.
Recently, we have formed many alliances with mainstream entertainment
venues, national and straight owned/
gay friendly businesses as well as many
local non-profit organizations. Today we
help promote the Dodge Theatre, ASU
Gammage, Jobing.com Arena, Mesa
Center for the Arts and Chandler Center
for the Arts. ION was lucky enough to
interview Charo this month, the fabulous
Latina entertainment icon of the last four
decades, who will be performing one
night only at Chandler Center for the
Arts on February 13. Read her interview
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Theatre January 16 for Kathy Griffin.
ION has always encouraged you to have
a fun, safe night out on the town. Over
the years law enforcement has cracked
down on DUIs. This month we are excited to announce that ION has partnered
with Discount Cab to be our exclusive
transportation company. Discount Cab
offers a unique program called FREE
RIDE BACK. They will drive you back
to your car the next day for free. Some
restrictions apply. See their ad on page
14 as well as on our Bar Specials Guide
on Page 90.
While most of you pick up ION at one of
150+ locations around the state, many
readers are now viewing the entire
magazine online and on their iPhone.
Now we are everywhere. People read us
throughout the United States, Canada,
Mexico, Brazil, Europe, Australia and
even Saudi Arabia. But last month we
received a letter from a reader in Cuba
(in Spanish!) Niorge Beltran - if you are
reading this, thank you for your letter
and good luck finding Mr. Right. We love
to hear from our readers in and out of
Arizona. Send a letter at ionarizona@
me.com. I personally read each letter.
I love a new year. Like a new lover, you
can take better care of this one then you
did the last one. What will you with your
new year? What will you do different?
What will you improve in your life, your
friendships and your community?
January 2010
Jack Tesorero
Publisher / Founder
www.IONAZ.com 17
ION ARIZONA STUDIO
3819 North 3rd Street Ste. #10, Phoenix, AZ 85012
(602) 308-4662 • Fax (602) 271-0939
www.IONAZ.com
[email protected]
Publisher
Jack M. Tesorero - Ext. 5 ........... [email protected]
CREATIVE DIRECTOR
Kevin Bushaw - Ext. 4 ..................... [email protected]
Editor AND CONTENT CZAR
Deon Brown - Ext. 3 .................. [email protected]
PRODUCTION ASSISTANT
Craig Rubin ................................. [email protected]
IONAZ.tv Director
Mike Chesworth ...................... [email protected]
PRODUCTION & Artwork
[email protected]
Advertising Sales
Jorge Suarez, Ext 2 ..................... [email protected]
Photographers:
Jerry O’Conner
Kurtis Scholz
Don Thompson
Michael Chesworth
Cover Photo by Jerry O’Conner & Kevin Bushaw
National Advertising Representative
Rivendell Media (212) 242-6863
ContributORS:
Corey Blanchette
Wes Bergman
Addison DeWitt
Jackson David Kelly
Ted Kirby
David Alan Maxey
Kim Ruff
Paul Sanchez
To Grow your business,
call (602) 308-4662
Published monthly by
© 2010 Tesorero Omni Media
a JMT Designs, Inc. company
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
PRINTED IN THE USA
All original artwork and photography for ION Arizona Magazine
remain property of JMT Designs, Inc, and cannot be reproduced, altered, or sold without authorization and compensation. Limited usage rights can be purchased for a small fee.
NOTE: The views expressed in these articles do not necessarily reflect the views of ION Arizona, its staff, or that of its
parent company.
Publication of the name or photograph of any person or
organization within ION Arizona is not to be construed as
any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons or
organization. To our knowledge, all people photographed
and published in ION Arizona are over the age of 18. Some
photos were submitted by our readers. To our knowledge,
they own the copyrights, and they have given us permission to
reproduce them. If you see a picture that you own, please call
us immediately and we will remove it from future publications.
All copy, text, display, photos, and illustrations in the ads are
published with the understanding that the advertisers are
fully authorized, have secured proper written consent for the
use of names, pictures, and testimonials of any living person,
and that ION Arizona is not responsible for unlawful use of
such content.
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January 2010
1995-2010: 15 Years of Design and Creative Excellence
January 2010 www.IONAZ.com 19
Jessika Murphy’s Show
Elements
Photos by Kurtis Scholz
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January 2010
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Desperado Film Festival
Forbidden’s
Birthday Blowout
Seems like only two years ago Forbidden opened
its doors for the first time. Hey! It was only two
years ago! They’re celebrating January 15-16 with
penny drinks from 8-10 p.m. plus a buffet, Barbra
Seville’s spectacular, the new Dynamite Divas show,
DJ, dancing and more! 6820 E. Fifth Ave. in Scottsdale.
www.ForbiddenAZ.com. Phone: 480-994-5176
Lambda Car Club Int’l.
Move over, Barrett-Jackson! The Lambda Car Club Int’l.
is sponsoring “FantAZy Island,” the regional invitational
January 15-16. During this fun-filled weekend the
community can enjoy the Car-Tiki Car Show, a tour
of the Hall of Flame, a banquet, silent auction and
entertainment. So get tuned up and we’ll see you at the
Embassy Suites at I-17 and Greenway. For more info and
registration visit www.AZgayCar.com
Southwest
Leather Conference
If you live the Leather Lifestyle or an enthusiast, join in the
camaraderie of this unique event with over people from all
world for the eighth year January 22-24. This conference
merges leather, spirit and more. Exciting new elements are
being added to celebrate this year’s conference. For more
info and online registration visit www.SouthwestLeather.org
Sacha and the Bivas
Join the sexy, sultry Sacha Sinclair as she plays
hostess for a unique drag show featuring BS
West’s Mike Fornelli, Kobalt’s Bryon Wiley, Lee
from Apollo’s and Mike Jacobs from The Rock as
they shoehorn their way into a gown and learn
how to walk in heels. It all benefits the Gay Pride
Foundation. The magic happens at Apollo’s. 5749 N.
7th St. Phoenix. Apollos.com Phone: 602-277-9373
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Just like Norma Desmond said, “Just us, those cameras,
and all of those wonderful people out there in the dark.”
Come to this fabulous GLBT film festival to enjoy four
feature length films and a host of short subjects with special guest speakers. Proceeds to benefit Paradise Valley
Community College P.R.I.D.E. Club. 34th St. and Cactus.
www.DesperadoFilmFestival.com Box Office: 602-787-7738
Miss and Mister PHX Gay Pride
It’s the Miss and Mister Phoenix Gay Pride Pageant! Who’ll win? A
bevy of beauties - nine, to be exact - and three “dudes” vie for the
coveted title. The event’s extra special guest star, the amazing Nina
Flowers from the first season RuPaul’s Drag Race, will be on hand
to wow the audience with her amazing talent. And it all takes place
at the luxurious Wyndham Downtown Phoenix. 50 E. Adams St. www.
PhoenixPride.org. Phone: 602-277-7433
januaRy 2010 ION EVENTS LISTINGS
DATEEVENT & LOCATIONCITY
Check out bar and nightclub ads in this issue for daily & weekly specials!
8
FindFred.com at Forbidden
Scottsdale
10
That Time of the Month at Apollo’s
Phoenix
14-16 Lamda Car Club Int’l.
Phoenix
15
Pajama Party at Babylon
Phoenix
15-16 2010 VIP Card Party at Dick’s & Dick’s II
Phoenix
15-16 Forbidden 2nd Anniversary Party
Scottsdale
16
Gay Mafia Party at BS West
Scottsdale
16
Kathy Griffin - Dodge Theatre
Phoenix
16
icepics 2nd Anniversary Blowout
Phoenix
17
Sasha & the Bivas - Apollo’s
Phoenix
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MLK Day Party - Karamba
Phoenix
22-24 SW Leather Conference
Phoenix
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manads.com Launch Party - Pumphouse
Phoenix
23
VIP Appreciation Party at Babylon
Phoenix
24
Drag King Fundraiser - Apollo’s
Phoenix
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Fetish Bash at Babylon
Phoenix
29-30 Desperado Film Festival - PVCC
Phoenix
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Miss Gay Arizona USofA - Wyndham Hotel Phoenix
February
6-3/28 Renaissance Festival Begins
6
Miss & Mister Phoenix Gay Pride
Phoenix
7
Superbowl Parties at bars everywhere!
January 2010 www.IONAZ.com 23
Silent Saturday
They didn’t need voices then. They had faces. Experience
the real magic of silent movies the way they were meant to be
seen: with an audience, in a glamorous theatre, on a big screen.
And with one, big, honkin’ Wurlitzer pipe organ pulling all the stops
out. See the hilarious Everyman Harold Lloyd in Safety Last at the
Orpheum Theatre on Saturday, January 9 at 7 p.m. 203 W. Adams St.
Visit www.SilentSundays.info to find out more.
Phoenix Fear Film Festival
If you like getting scared shitless, then hightail it over to the MADCAP
Theaters for the 3rd Annual Phoenix Fear Film Festival on Saturday,
January 23. See teenage slasher flicks, tales of supernatural terror,
psychological horror and, of course, lots of bloody
gore. Yikes! 730 S. Mill Ave. For tix & details
visit www.phxfearfilmfestival.com
Barrett-Jackson
Classic Car Auction
Looking for Hitler’s 1936 Duesenberg? An Isotta-Fraschini convertible? A ’65 Mustang? A Yugo? You can find ‘em here – well, maybe
not the Yugo – at the world famous Barrett-Jackson Classic Car
Auction at WestWorld in fancy Scottsdale January 18-24. Great for
celebrity watching, too! 16601 N. Pima Rd. Phone: 480-663-6255
January 2010 ION around town listings
DATE 2
3-7
7-10 8-10
9
thru 10
14-24
14
15-17
15-17
16
16
16
18-24
23
24-25
30
24
ARTIST / EVENTLOCATION
Fiesta Bowl Parade
Central Phoenix
Arizona Bach Festival
Phoenix
Arizona National Horse Show - Westworld
Scottsdale
Arizona Home & Garden Show
Phx Convention Center
Silent Saturday - Orpheum Theatre
Phoenix
Zoo Lights at Phx Zoo
Phoenix
World Music Festival Valleywie
Annual Rockin’ ArtWalk - various galleries
Scottsdale
Maricopa Cty Home & Garden Show - State Fairgrounds
Phoenix
Carefree Art & Wine Fest
downtown Carefree
Glendale Glitter & Snow
downtown Glendale
Multicultural Festival
Chandler Public Library
P.F. Chang’s Rock ‘n’ Roll Marathon
Valleywide
Barrett-Jackson Auto Auction - WestWorld
Scottsdale
Phoenix Fear Film Festival - MadCap Theatres
Tempe
Antique Market - AZ State Fairgrounds
Phoenix
Walk ‘n’ Roll Dog Walk - Town Lake
Tempe
www.IONAZ.com January 2010
Riverdance
Who doesn’t love Riverdance? Who? This show-stopping
troupe of Irish step dancing was a worldwide phenomenon
back in the mid-1990s. Ladies – and more than a few men –
swooned over the golden tressed Sir Michael Flatley: the (former)
Lord of the Dance. Still, they can dance a pretty good jig. Come see
them shake it at the Orpheum Theatre on January 26-31. Visit www.ticketmaster.com for tickets or call 602-534-5600 for more information.
Heart
“Ooooooh Barracuda!” The legendary sister and lesbian magnets
Heart will be making their way through Arizona on January 31,
and they are ready to get “Crazy, Crazy On You”! Just try to
understand, try to understand, they are a magic band. Head
on over to watch the magic happen at Desert Diamond Casino.
1100 W. Pima Mine Rd., Sahuarita. For tix call
520-294-7777.
New Found Glory
Watch these pop-punk veterans take the
stage with Saves The Day, Hellogoodbye, and Fireworks
on January 31. This 10 year anniversary show will be a
pop-punk explosion, and it’s all going down at the Marquee Theatre. 730 N. Mill Ave.,Tempe. Get tix at
480-829-0707 or visit luckymanonline.com
Coco peru
January 2010 ION Concert Calendar
DATE ARTIST / EVENTLOCATION
2
Patti LuPone
Phoenix Symphony Hall
5
Sonic Youth
Marquee Theatre
17
Johnny Mathis
Phoenix Symphony Hall
23
Slayer & MegaDeth
Dodge Theatre
26
The Bled & Strike Anywhere
The Clubhouse
26-31RiverdanceOrpheum Theatre
29
CaliZona West Coast Tour
Celebrity Theatre
30
Herb Alpert & Lani Hall
Scottsdale Center for the Arts
30
AFI
Marquee Theatre
31New Found Glory
Marquee Theatre
31
Heart
Desert Diamond Casino
Photos by Mike Chesworth
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February
5
George Strait & Reba
13
Charo
US Airways Center
Chandler Center for the Arts
January 2010
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by Jackson David Kelly
[email protected]
Yo, DJ!
What’s New?
Happy New Year! As usual, January is slow
for music, but there are a few albums to find.
In addition to these, check out material from
Omarion, Vampire Weekend, Three 6 Mafia,
Ashley Brown (the new Disney/Broadway
superstar) as well as a career spawning 3CD
set from Enigma (remixes and 11 unreleased
tracks). Until Sade’s new release in February
(her first since 2000), continue finding solace
in your bests from 2009!
Allison Iraheta
Bust Like You
Plain and simple –– this
is the best packaged
album to come from
American Idol in years.
Part Pink, part Avril, part
Etheridge with a hint of
Gwen, Allison proves
why she should’ve been
in the top two. On lead
single “Friday I’ll Be Over You,” Allison gives
us a radio perfect tune that’s current and
fun, much in the vein of Clarkson’s “Since
You’ve Been Gone.” Other tracks of note
include the rock jamming “Holiday” as well
as the mid-tempo gems “No One Else” and
“Just Like You.” And then there’s the eerie
“Scars” where she flexes her talent as well
as channels the sound of Pink. Overall, this
is an album of greatness.
Ke$ha
Animal
She was introduced on
Flo Rida’s “Right Round”
and now she’s huge with
her smash “Tik Tok.”
Her debut, described
as “fun, unapologetic,
rowdy, quirky humorous
electro pop magic,”
looks to continue her wave of success
with her infamous unusual speak singing.
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Second single “Blah Blah” with 3OH!3 fits
perfectly with its Atari pong-like soundtrack
while “Stephen” provides the only ballad
and speaks of her obsession with a boy.
And then there’s the clever and cheer-like
song of “Dinosaur” where she complains of
trolls. Other tracks of note include “Animal,”
“Backstabber” and “V.I.P.” By and large, this
is definitely as fun as it gets.
Katherine McPhee
Unbroken
After coming in second
on American Idol in 2005
and securing a contract
with RCA, she now
finds a better home with
Verve. Her sophomore
release is very stripped
down with hints of Paula
Cole and has moments of brilliance in a
softer side of Katherine. Lead single “It’s
Not Right” is a beautiful mid-tempo ballad
with a refreshing and haunting piano riff
while “How” and it’s “They Say” drop in give
great support. The only slight drawback is
the album’s dependence on ballads like the
ghostly yet stunning “Say Goodbye.” But
when offset with the tracks mentioned as
well as “Keep Drivin’,” Miss McPhee has
great reason to celebrate.
TOP SINGLES of 2009
#1 – Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face”
#2 – Imogen Heap’s “First Train Home”
#3 – Madonna’s “Celebration” (Benassi remix)
#4 – Matt Alber’s “End of the World”
#5 – Kelly Rowland’s “When Love Takes Over”
#6 – Pink’s “Please Don’t Leave Me”
#7 – Muse’s “Uprising”
#8 – Snow Patrol’s “Just Say Yes”
#9 – Chicane’s “Poppiholla”
#10 – The Noisette’s “Never Forget You”
January 2010
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Miss & Mister Gay Pride 2010
An It’s
the Miss and Mister Phoenix Gay Pride Pageant!
Who’ll win? A bevy of beauties - nine, to be exact - and three
“dudes” vie for the coveted title. The event’s extra special
guest star, the amazing Nina Flowers from the first season
RuPaul’s Drag Race, will be on hand to wow the audience
with her amazing talent. And it all takes place at the luxurious
Wyndham Downtown Phoenix. 50 E. Adams St. www.PhoenixPride.org. Phone: 602-277-7433
JANUARY 2010 ION DRAG LISTINGS
DATE TIME LOCATION
Second & Fourth Wed. Tuesdays
10:30p
Wednesdays
10:00p
Wednesdays
10:30p
Thursdays
10:30p
Thursdays
9:30p
Thursdays
10:30p
Last Friday
10:00p
Fridays
9:30p
3rd Thurs.
8:00p
Saturdays
10:00p
Saturdays
10:00p
Saturdays 10:00p
Saturdays
9:30p
Saturdays
10:30p
Sundays
8:30p
Sundays
10:30p
Sunday 8:00p
Sunday 10th 8:00p
Sunday 17th 8:00p
Sunday 24th
8:00p
Sunday 31st 8:00p
Sunday 31st
6:00p
SHOW / PERFORMER(S)
Pumphouse II
What a Drag... Pun Intended hosted by Savannah
Karamba
Susana’s Show
Charlie’s
Claudia B. & Company
Karamba
Diamond Dallas Hosts...
Pumphouse II
Hot Bodz Male Revue w/ Savannah
Amsterdam
Icons Live w/ Kiki Vermont
Karamba
Susana’s Show
Cherry Lounge Scandalous w/ Scandalesque
BS West
Elements
Forbidden
Ruby ‘n’ Friends
The Rock
Diamond Dolls with Mya McKenzie
icepics
The Follies Comedy Drag Show
Forbidden
The Barbra Seville Show
Charlie’s
Pussy’s Patio Show
Pumphouse II
Hot Bodz Male Revue w/ Savannah
Charlie’s
Pussy LeHoot & Friends
Karamba
Galilea’s Show
Apollo’s
TTotMonth show with Afeelya Bunz
Apollo’s
TTotM Show- With T.C. Taylor & Dottie Pepper
Apollo’s
Sasha Sinclair with bar owners as drag queens
Apollo’s
Drag King fundraiser
Apollo’s That Time of the Month show with Barbra Seville
The Wyndham Grand Ballroom
Miss Gay AZ USofA Pageant
To add your drag event, e-mail dates, times, locations & pics to [email protected]
Included events must be 1) Charity Benefit OR 2) Located at an ION Arizona Advertiser
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WELCOME!
We would like to welcome the
following businesses to the ION Family!
•
•
•
•
•
•
Discount Cab
US Bank
Skye Dinner Theatre
Renaissance Festival
Tangible Tanning
Who’s Next Barber Shop
Support the businesses that
support our community.
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by Deon Brown
Charo
Cuchi Cuchi!
H
er passport says that she’s
María Rosario Pilar Martínez Molina
Moquiere de les Esperades Santa
Ana Romanguera y de la Najosa
Rasten. But we know her as the exotic
and outrageous Charo, known for
her zany talk show antics and her
vivacious Las Vegas performances.
She sat down to chat with ION about
her new show, how she started in
show business, television, and more.
Charo is charming, warm, crazy,
and tremendously funny. She’s also
devoted to making music – she’s been
voted The Best Flamenco Guitarist in
America – twice. You may not know
that she is also the Vice President
of the National Muscular Dystrophy
Association, fluent in Spanish, English,
French, Italian and Japanese as well
as a loving wife and mother. Charo
is exactly like you would imagine.
We’ve tried to capture Charo’s unique
conversational style here. The only
things missing are the rolling r’s and
soft, Castilian lisp of her native Spain.
Feel free to insert your own “cuchi,
cuchis.” ¡Arriba!
Charo: !Hola! ¿Como estas?
ION: ¡Muy bien, gracias! ¿Y usted? I’m
recording our conversation ...
Charo: ¡No problema! What
conversation you wanna hear? In
English, in Spanish or in Spanglish?
ION: We better do it in English. That’s
about the extent of my Spanish! We’re
very excited to speak with you! We’ve
watched you on TV for so many years;
we feel like we know you.
Charo: I am so glad to talk to you!
That is exactly how I feel, too! I feel like
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I know you, too! Do you know your
DNA? Your grandparents, what country
they come from? From Spain or South
America?
ION: No, England. Germany. I’m a
Gringo.
Charo: Okay! You are muy Gringo!
¡Mucho gusto! Okay, now listen, I am
now recording a CD for England. And
to my surprise, they understand my
English excellent! They got a lot of fun
with my English and they’re a beautiful
audience. They love flamenco music!
You’ve got to see my show! You got
to see it! It is all Latin! The audience
want what I do the best. And what I
can do the best is from when I was
listening from my mother when she
is breastfeeding me ... Flamenco,
beautiful, beautiful music, that I love
also. I studied under Andres Segovia.
So, I figured it out: if the audience
remember the “cuchi cuchi” boolsheet,
that it’s okay, because the “cuchi cuchi”
show me the way to the bank.
Here’s the situation. They remember
that. I never think about yesterday. I
think about today and tomorrow. And
this resonates with the audience.
Because that’s what I am: I am a
musician at heart. I am ever down or
depressed, I don’t do drugs; I pick
up my guitar and make music. Make
music, play Flamenco that is in my
DNA. Then, I am no more ‘deprimado,’
I am, ‘Cuchi! Cuchi!’
ION: If you weren’t Charo, what do you
think you’d be doing?
Charo: That’s a good question! Thank
you for asking. (Pauses thoughtfully) I
would be, definitely, a doctor. No doubt
about it. A doctor. Medicine is one of
my secret passions. And I would be a
January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 35
very compassionate
doctor because I love
people. I’m not a doctor because we
did not have the money. My family,
they pay for my education. In Spain, if
you are rich, even if you are a stupid
person, somehow you graduate. If you
are poor, but brilliant, you go nowhere,
because you will not get an education.
So what was next? My other passion,
music, I audition and that is why I get
to study with Andres Segovia. I do not
take one peseta. I do my best. Years
later when I come to America, to the
casino, I want to play
Flamenco. The
producer, he
say, “No Flamingo!” I say,
“No! No! Flamenco!” He think I mean
the bird! Then, I learn, “Cuchi, Cuchi
is in. The guitar is gonna wait.” And
I did wait. For a long time. I would
like to introduce this beautiful new
show of Latin music to my American
audience, believe me, will enjoy to the
maximum, and will talk after and will
not forget. Because I wanted to use my
experience of year after year after year
of performing.
ION: You were on The Love Boat a
record breaking eight times as April
Lopez! What TV show would you like to
guest star on today?
Charo: We are now due for
a good sitcom! The reality
programs continually ask
me more than you can
imagine because of
my record with VH1
and The Surreal
Life they approach
me with a reality
show. But the reality
show right now are
tacky and stupid.
But I think it’s time
that the networks bring
a beautiful, beautiful a
show for the whole family
to enjoy, to really laugh,
with a good writer, and not
in a disgusting, or offensive
way. I want one that will not
embarrass my son, who is
beautiful, to watch and be
proud of me all my life.
Marshall
for San Francisco Gay Pride. You
also starred in an episode of RuPaul’s
Drag Race. Your Gay fans love you!
Can you comment on that?
Charo: Well, let me tell you: the great
‘Hollywood,’ the town we are in right
now, I can tell you, Hollywood would
not be Hollywood without the talent
and the emotion and the extra care of
the Gays. They are beautiful. America
has to grow up. It is the best country
in the world – and believe me, I travel,
but when I come back to America, and
since I was young, young, young, I
love this country. When are you going
to grow up? Discrimination is out of
my vocabulary. When America grows
up and clean up her act, it will be a
privilege to live here! It is getting better!
But I am a great fan – a great fan – of
these fabulous, beautiful people. Why
do they even have to have this title? In
America they call them Gay, but I no
see them as a Gay, but as a person. I
don’t know how to explain it any better.
Why even have the title, ‘Gay,’ I don’t
understand.
ION: You are an outspoken opponent
of bullfighting and a member of PETA.
Tell us more.
Charo: Oh, yes! But the story
here is when I came back to show my
boy Spain and the bullfight, it came
to me like a flashback, ‘These people
are barbaric!’ Right? They are sitting
and applauding, they torture – for 55
minutes – this beautiful animal. I cannot
believe it. These are not the Roman
or Greek times! I apologize to my son,
yes, I’m Spanish by birth but this is
embarrassing. I have been all my life
fighting against the bullfight and I am
glad that PETA agrees with me. That is
why I did a video against the bullfight.
It’s very clever; it is a story about a little
baby bull named Manolo, He is scared
because he is dreaming that when he
grows up he’s gonna get killed like his
father and grandfather. So he escape
to Hollywood where to his surprise he
sees that there is a new generation
who are not killing bulls anymore. Right
now, I am not kidding we are about 75
or 80% of everybody, including Italy,
against bullfighting. So I do something
good! The bulls will never know!
Manolo live with me here in Beverly
Hills. Nobody knows, except the
neighbors! He thinks he is human and I
am the mother! He lives now at a ranch
and he is so happy! He is so cute! He’s
got big eyes, small nose – he looks like
a me a little bit! (Laughs)
ION: You were the
Celebrity Grand
36 www.IONAZ.com
www.IONAZ.com December
January 2010
36
2009
January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 37
ION: Tell us a secret
about Charo.
Charo: You know, people ask me all
the time, “When are you going to write
a book?” and I say, “Why? Everybody
already know!” I never fool around with
people. I never had the time; I was too
busy. Not because I am some kind of
saint. I never have any kind of scandal,
I’ve never been arrested, I never take
drugs. It is gonna be the most boring
book in the history of writing and put
everybody to sleep on the second
page! But am a chocolate addict! I will
work for chocolate! And people can see
it! Over Christmas and Thanksgiving
I eat boxes and boxes! I look like a
chocolate in high heels!There is no
38
www.IONAZ.com
January 2010
good gossip.
The National Enquirer and
everybody, they like me and there’s
nothing they can write. Actually my life
has been dedicated to my family and
my career. There was no time for me to
be fooling around.
ION: What’s more important: Money,
Love, Food, or Cuchi Cuchi?
Charo: What a question! That’s
an excellent question! That is very
ambitious! To me, everything is
important! Love is number one. Money
is second ... Food and ... Cuchi Cuchi!
You can see the fabulous Spanish
Bombshell performing live on Saturday,
February 13 at 7:30 p.m. at the Hale
Center for the Performing Arts at
4132 E. Pecos Rd. in Gilbert.
January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 39
VIP
SAVINGS
RESTAURANTS / BARS / EVENTS
FORBIDDEN $5 Forbidden Martini ANYTIME!
BAR 1Select Half Price Drinks on Sunday
ION ARIZONA MAGAZINE $10 OFF Splash Bash cover
INCOGNITO 2 for the price of 1 all drinks
Z PIZZA 10% OFF
SERVICES
BOXER’S MEN’S SALON FREE haircut by Adrian only
(First time customers only)
20% OFF all services with Adrian
FAST SIGNS ON CENTRAL 20% OFF (in-store products)
LOS OLIVOS HAND CAR WASH $2 OFF any car wash
15% OFF complete detail
OPEN WIDE DENTAL $50 OFF new clients
SEMONE ROCHLIN, D.O. $500 OFF ALL Surgical Procedures
RETAIL
DRAGONFLY BOUTIQUE 10% OFF
GREEN WOODPECKER 10% OFF Flowers
(excludes tax and delivery charges)
10% OFF Merchandise non-sale
(excluding food, drinks and cards)
ROOT SELLER 15% OFF Merchandise
(excludes books, music, DVDs, supplements & consignment art)
UNIQUE URBAN BOUTIQUE 10% OFF Merchandise
(excludes books, music, DVDs)
HOTELS
BLUE MOON RESORT - VEGASBuy two nights get 3 nights
CLARENDON HOTEL 10% any room type booking
DOUBLETREE HOTEL - TUCSON 10% any room type booking
Must book directly with the hotel.
Certain black-out dates and some restrictions may apply.
Offer based upon availability.
ADULT*
ADULT SHOPPE 20% OFF Merchandise
FASCINATIONS 15% OFF merchandise
DICK’S CABARET $5 OFF admission (mon-thurs)
$5 OFF wristband (mon-sat)
SECRETS 20% OFF Merchandise*
*Must be 18 or older. Excludes rentals.
In-store purchases only
MORE TO COME!!!
40
www.IONAZ.com January 2010
Some restrictions apply. See store for details.
Not valid with any other offer or sale items.
January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 41
August:
Osage County
C’mon down and meet the Westons! This dysfunctional family
includes an absent father, a drug-addled mother, a marriage
unraveling and a family approaching total meltdown. This Tony
Award and Pulitzer Prize-winning play is the kind of scathingly funny
play you’ll be talking about for months. Catch it as ASU Gammage from
January 5-10. 1200 S. Forest Ave. in Tempe. For tix go to www.ASUGammage.
com or call 480-965-3434
Jason Alexander as Donny Clay
Imagine motivational speakers Tony Robbins, Deepak Chopra
and Dr. Phil all rolled into one, single, chubby little ball of fire
and you’ve got Seinfeld’s Jason Alexander as Donny Clay.
Be part of the hilarious tool of enlightenment and change.
Where is it? At the Celebrity Theatre, of course! 440
N. 32nd St. Phone: 602-267-1600
Kathy Griffin
Eternal D-Lister and fag hag funny girl comes to the Dodge
Theatre to spill the beans about everybody who’s a train
wreck in Hollywood or destined to crash and burn. Catch this
carrot topped chatterbox and the Dodge Theatre at 400 W.
Washington St. in Phoenix. For tickets call 602-379-2888 or
visit www.LiveNation.com
January 2010 ION THEATER + STANDUP
DATEEVENTLOCATION
5-10
5
7
7-23
8-2/21
9
10
14-17
14-24
16
thru 17
22-24
22-2/7
22-2/13
23-2/13
28-30
29-2/7
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www.IONAZ.com January 2010
August: Osage County
ASU Gammage
Madea’s Big Happy Family
Dodge Theatre
Unsinkable Molly Brown
B’way Palm Dinner Theatre
Julius Caeser
Mesa Arts Ctr.
Gypsy AZ Broadway Theatre
Jason Alexander as Donny Clay Celebrity Theatre
Gershwin by Ira
Chandler Ctr. for the Arts
Norm MacDonald
Tempe Improv
Fathers & Other Strangers
Kathy Griffin
Dodge Theatre
Ain’t Misbehavin’ Herberger Theater
Mike Epps
Tempe Improv
Shipwrecked!
Herberger Theater
Fuddy Meers
Phoenix Theatre
[title of show]
Herberger Theater
Mike Birbiglia
Tempe Improv
25th Putnam Cty. Spelling Bee
PHONE
480-965-3434
602-379-2888
480-325-6700
480-641-7039
623-8400
602-994-ARTS
480-782-2680
480-921-9877
602-258-6128
602-379-2888
602-265-6995
480-921-9877
602-265-6995
602-274-2432
602-622-2823
480-921-9877
480-965-6447
January 2010 www.IONAZ.com 43
ARIZONA GAY VOLLEYBALL
MORE PICTURES AT IONA Z.COM
44
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January 2010
January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 45
by Kimberly M. Ruff
[email protected]
Movie Previews
Leap Year
Starring: Amy Adams, Matthew Goode,
Adam Scott
Loosely based on the Bollywood film, Jab
We Met (2007), Leap Year is the story
of Anna (Adams, Sunshine Cleaning,
Enchanted), who travels to Ireland to
propose to her boyfriend, Jeremy (Scott,
Stepbrothers, The Aviator), on February
29th. According to an Irish tradition, if a
woman proposes to
a man on leap
day, the man
is obligated
to accept.
Sounds
like a
sure
thing,
except
…a
storm
threatens to
derail Anna’s
plans, until she
enlists the help of
a surly
innkeeper (Goode, Match
Point). Will she get to her boyfriend in time
to pop the question? Or will the events
leading up to the critical moment make her
rethink her plan? After looking at
the pictures of the two male
leads for a considerable
amount of time, I’m
going to bet on her
ultimately pairing
with Goode’s
character, as
he is far more
amiable looking
than Scott.
Sorry, fella.
Release Date:
January 8, 2010
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Youth in Revolt
Starring: Michael Cera, Portia
Doubleday, Ray Liotta, Steve Buscemi
Based on the 1993 novel by C. D. Payne,
Youth in Revolt tells the angst-ridden
story of hyper-intelligent and woefully
under-sexed Nick Twisp (Cera, Nick and
Norah’s Infinite Playlist, Superbad) who
meets Sheeni (Doubleday, 18), when his
mother and stepfather decide to go on
vacation to a religious Mobile Home Park
in order to dodge embittered, swindled
sailors. While Nick is certainly awkwardly
smitten with Sheeni (Cera’s trademark
character trait), he opts to woo her by
breaking the law, and has to adopt alter
egos in the form of the French François
and the female Carlotta to avoid the fuzz.
Like the novel, which is told through a
series of mixed documents like journal
entries, letters, and other correspondence,
the film is a cinematic collage – images
of a tumultuous, confused, frightening
and equally thrilling life glued, taped,
and stapled together. If you enjoy the
pop cultural smorgasbord that typifies
modern cinema, you’ll dig Youth in Revolt.
Release Date: January 8, 2010.
Comments? Reach the writer
at kimberlymruff@
yahoo.com
by Wes Bergman
[email protected]
DVD Movie Review
Kathy Griffin:
She’ll Cut a Bitch
Be Mine
I’m going to reveal something shocking
to you, my beloved readers: I’ve never
been acquainted with Kathy Griffin until
watching this stand-up special. Sure, I’ve
seen a few episodes of Suddenly Susan,
and I remember
the
gravelly voiced
redhead
making an
appearance
hither and
thither,
but never
watched
My Life on
the D-List,
and never saw
her do stand-up.
Thanks to the best job
in the world that gives me carte blanche to be
a snarky queen about free screeners, I finally
became acquainted with Ms. Griffin and I
must say – I like her, a lot! Her hour-long
special is, based on my limited understanding
of her comedic style, much of the same
– anecdotes from her various Hollywood
activities, including her experiences at the
Emmys, finally meeting her idol, Cher, and
living with her aging mother. Her candor,
warmth, and wit makes her a great stand-up
comedienne. While she frequently admits
her style of humor has rubbed celebrities the
wrong way, there is absolutely no malice in
her teasing; if anything, Griffin’s observations
are on the absurdity of Hollywood and she
acknowledges her own contribution to the
mix. In addition to her hour long special,
Griffin is currently on tour and slated to
appear at the Dodge Theater on Saturday,
January 16th. Get tickets while you still can!
Recently released by Ariztical Entertainment,
Be Mine, is the charming tale of how a
chance encounter and a conspiring group
of well-meaning friends are able to help
facilitate a budding romance even in the face
of virginity and crippling shyness. Romantic
dreamer, Mayson (Selon), has been holding
out for the right guy, hoping and praying that
the first kiss is as electric as it’s claimed to
be. When the handsome Reiley (Welch)
buys the last chocolate scone at Mayson’s
favorite coffee shop, he wonders if there’s
any decency left, until he runs into Reiley
again at his friend Eric’s Valentine’s Day
Party. Will he be able to overcome the
shyness that has precluded him from making
an honest connection, or will he once again
begrudgingly opt for solitude? It’s a lowbudget film, but if you’re able to get past
some of the technical pitfalls that accompany
a limited budget, you’ll appreciate the
storyline that is as old as yours truly.
Kendra Thomas, Chris Greene, and
Becky Johnston co-star.
(Side note for you reality TV
whores: you may remember
Johnston as “Buckwild” from
VH1’s Flava of Love and I
Love Money 2.)
Starring: Kathy Griffin
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www.IONAZ.com January 2010
Starring: Dan Selon, Kendra Thomas,
Jared Welch, Becky Johnston, Chris
Greene
Questions? Comments?
Reach the writer at
wesobergman@
yahoo.com
NEW
LOCATIONS!
You can now pick up ION Arizona
at these great locations:
• UPS Store (7th St./McDowell)
• Central Ave. and Encanto
• Nu Towne Saloon
• Babylon Showclub
• Starbucks (Park Central)
• Fascinations (North Scottsdale)
• Fascinations (South Scottsdale)
You can also download this and
past issues at www.IONAZ.com
50
www.IONAZ.com January 2010
January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 51
SKYE
Dinner and a Show
Long before Muriel’s Wedding, The
Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the
Desert and Mamma Mia! ever existed,
the music of Anni-Frid Lyngstad, Björn
Ulvaeus, Benn Andersson, Agnetha
Fältskog from Sweden topped the
charts between 1972 and 1982.
We all know them as ABBA.
Though they broke up long
ago, their catchy music with
it’s soaring melodies still sells
between two to four million
albums a year.
If you miss ABBA
and wish you
could their
music performed
live, now’s
your chance!
Anne Davies
and Chelsea
Faulds sing, while
an eight piece band led
by Terry Davies back them
up. Together, they form the
tribute band, ABBA Fab,
hailing from Liverpool,
originally,and will perform on
February 4 & 5 at 8 p.m. at
Skye Supper Club.
ABBA Fab belts out the best of
the best from those fabled Swedes of
long ago in a lush supper club setting,
reminiscent of yesteryear. ABBA Fab
performs with a multi-media production
chronicling the meteoric fame of the
quartet. Clocking in at around an hour or
so, the time flies. And if you love ABBA,
you’ll be in good company.
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www.IONAZ.com January 2010
You’ll be offered a delicious menu while
you sit back and enjoy the show in the
spacious, beautifully appointed club.
Note that most seating is “community
style” – meaning you’ll be a a
trestle table with several other
parties. Intimate banquettes
seating approximately six
are available, too.
Award-winning Chef Scott
Tompkins created the inspired
menu for Skye. Consider starting
out with the Atlantic Calamari,
breaded in parmesan breadcrumbs
and deep fried, and served with
roasted tomato and sweet ‘n’
sour sauce. Seven other choices,
including oysters – either on the
half-shell, or served Rockefeller –
are available. Most are around
$10.
A variety of salads and
two soups – including
a luscious bowl of
Lobster Bisque – are
available.
Make it a special
occasion and try their ten
gourmet entrées. Five are
beef, one chicken, two seafood,
a rack of lamb and one pasta make it a
difficult choice. Prices range from $16$34 here.
An excellent option is the Pre Fixe Three
Course Dinner, for $46.95 per person.
The Chicken Marsala with spinach
fettucini and daily vegetables is a smash,
January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 53
featuring a large, very
moist breast of chicken classically
prepared. You can’t go wrong with the
Petite Filet - a succulent seven-ounce
filet mignon with whipped potatoes and
daily vegetables.
Dessert gives you the option of Crème
Brulée or a cake they call Chocolate
Decadence. They’re not kidding.
The venue also includes Raymond’s
Martini Bar, with live entertainment. You
can always schedule a private event at
Skye and create a custom menu with
Chef Tomkins, too.
Can you hear the drums, Fernando?
Head over to Skye for the ABBA Fab
show and you will.
Sun-Thurs 3-1 a.m.
Fri-Sat 3-2 a.m.
Happy Hour 3-6 p.m. daily
Restaurant Hours
Dinner 5-10 p.m.
Open ‘til 11 p.m. Fri & Sat.
Lunch: Mon-Sat 11 a.m.- 2 p.m.
Skye Fine Dining and Live
Entertainment
16844 N. Arrowhead Fountain Center
Peoria, Arizona
623-334-0010
www.skye-restaurant.com
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January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 55
Ion holiday party
Photo by Kurtis Scholz
56
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January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 57
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January 2010
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Desperado
Film Festival
“You know what your problem is? It’s
that you haven’t seen enough movies.
All of life’s riddles are answered in the
movies.” According to Steve Martin, that
is. He ought to know. He’s in movies.
The first annual Desperado Film Festival
promises a wide variety of GLBT
themed movies that just might answer
some of Life’s riddles. Other films just
might pose a few riddles, too. But if you
like movies with a Queer focus – or if
you just love movies – you won’t want to
miss it.
Alan East, Chair of the festival told ION,
“Desperado is planning two days full of
films and fun. We’re combining great
films, special guests, and lots of student
and staff support to build the festival into
an annual event. One surprise is that the
short film A Belch Can Ruin A Wedding
is a festival premier and was made
right here in our city by the Phoenix
Metropolitan Philharmonic Ensemble.”
The Desperado Film Festival marks
an important milestone within our
community, and in academia. East
elaborated, “Celebrating GLBT films on
the Paradise Valley Community College
campus recognizes the achievements
of filmmakers, allows for a strong sense
of inclusiveness for gay students and
displays sincere Community College
outreach for the metro Phoenix GLBT
population. Also, the festival will provide
a wonderful opportunity for the PRIDE
student club and Student Life to be
involved in campus life in a more active
way.” Four special guest speakers will
be speak in a Q&A Forum after the
feature films.
Proceeds from this event, the campus
club, P.R.I.D.E. (People Respecting
Individuality, Diversity and Equality),
will establish the PVCC Rainbows
GLBT films are growing in importance.
East explained why. “Film as an art
form enlightens and provokes
thought. It engages people,
stimulates conversation and
challenges people to see
the world in new ways.
A GLBT film festival has
the capacity to broaden
minds, strengthen
tolerance and breaks
down stereotypes in a
comfortable environment
for the masses.”
60
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January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 61
Patrik
1,5
Big Gay Musical
Scholarship.
Providing access
to education is
critical to the success
of the college’s
youth. Paradise Valley
Community College excels in
leadership building, educational support,
and career opportunities. Opening these
possibilities for Phoenix LGBT youth is
their goal.
Giving an opportunity to gay and lesbian
students to view films that reflect their
culture as well as be part of the process
of creating an exciting event like this will
empower and strengthen their character.
This is a great leadership opportunity
for the GLBT students of Paradise
Valley Community College’s P.R.I.D.E.
organization.
All films will be screened in the fully
equipped, state-of-the-art Center for
the Performing Arts at Paradise Valley
Community College at 34th Street and
Union Hills at the east end of campus.
DESPERADO
FILM FESTIVAL
TICKETS
& INFO
Box Office:
602-787-7738
For more information visit
DesperadoFilmFestival.com
62
www.IONAZ.com January 2010
Embrem Entertainment
2009
Saturday, Jan. 30, 8 p.m.
Paul & Eddie have just
begun previews for the
new Off-Broadway musical.
Their lives strangely mirror
the characters they are playing;
can sexuality & faith mix?
Hannah Free
Ripe Fruit Films
2009
Saturday,
Jan. 30, 5
p.m.
Hannah and
Rachel grew
up in the
same small
town, where
traditional
gender
expectations
eventually challenge
their deep love for one another, yet they
maintain their love affair.
AMANCIO…Two Faces
on a Tombstone
Downtown Loft Studios
2009
Saturday,
Jan. 30th 2:30 p.m.
Amancio Corrales
immigrated from
Mexico to Arizona.
Gay and Hispanic, he
dreamed of one day
being a performer in
Las Vegas, but his life
was tragically cut short .
Here Films
2008
Friday, Jan.
29th 7 p.m.
Göran and Sven
adopt a Swedish
orphan, Patrik 1,5
but he’s not the little boy they were
expecting and in comes a 15-year-old
homophobe with a criminal past.
Short Films:
Saturday, January 30th 12 noon
A Belch Can Ruin A Wedding - 2009
Director David M Ice / Festival World
Premier
Little Mel and Studly Doright meet and
“tie the knot” in the state’s first gay
marriage. But will the dastardly Rev.
Fred Belch foil the happy couple’s
plans? Will true love win out?
25 Random Things I Did
During My Big Fat
Lesbian Depression
- 2009
A comedic look
at one lesbian’s
journey of
recovery from
an unreal break
up using the
framework of
social media to
poke fun at some of
the crazy, yet personal
things we do in life.
Temperatures rise and pants fall when
Millie and her gay dad negotiate their
complicated family dynamics.
Buttery Top
- Cotton
Lover Films
2009
A jug of
wine, a loaf
of bread
- but wait
- what kind
of bread? A
comedy about
a first date with
extra baggage.
Dancing to Happiness - 2009
Anna and Helen, two women living in
different worlds and normally would
never meet, until they enroll in the
same salsa course. A Lesbian fairytale
depicting the possibility of overcoming
social borders.
Make A Mate - 2009
What matters most to you when picking
a partner? Does it matter what
gender your partner is as long as
they are a great human being?
Wouldn’t it be nice if we had
some control?
Sombrero - 2009
James and Raymond are two
men looking for a connection in
life. They meet for a blind date
in a Mexican restaurant. But as
they learn about each other, their
rocky date takes an unexpected turn
toward the absurd.
Daddy’s Big Girl - 2008
Millie, a plus-size girl has some major
minuses in the personality department.
January 2010
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Ad Compliments of
0
1
20
January 29th and 30th, 2010
Paradise Valley Community College’s
Center for the Performing Arts
32nd Street and Union Hills
Phoenix, AZ
Q&A’s, special guests, and one world
premier from right here in Phoenix!
Box Office: 602.787.7738
Features include Amancio
Hannah Free(with Sharon Gless)
The Big Gay Musical
Patrik 1,5
and a short film series
Check out our website for film
schedule, descriptions, and more.
64
www.IONAZ.com January 2010
www.desperadofilmfestival.com
The Miss Gay Arizona 2010
USofA Pageant Sets the
Stage for Local Beauties
T
here’s nothing we like more than a contest.
Throw in some sequins, a few feathers,
false eyelashes, red lipstick, lots and lots of
rhinestones, and some of the best talent in
female illusion from across the country, and
you’ve got yourself the Reina del Sol Pageant
– for contestants over the age of 40 – and
the stellar Miss Gay Arizona USofA Pageant.
The theme of this year’s pageant is “Egyptian
Beauty ... Ascension to the Throne.”
Maybe it’s Maybelline, but a lot more goes into
competing in a pageant than you might think.
For the talented drag queens who compete
and qualify for this glamorous pageant, the big,
Miss Gay
Arizona USofA 2009
Mya McKenzie
January 2010
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juicy crown and the prestige awaiting them are
worth the hard work. If they win, the winner
and first alternate of both pageants will go on
to represent Arizona at the National Pageant
in Dallas, Texas in May. The winners of the
National Pageants will reign over the entire
USofA system for a year, traveling all over
the country performing, promoting the USofA
system, and overseeing all of the preliminary
pageants for next years’ contest. That
adds up to a lot of “man hours” in
high heels for these gals.
Behind the scenes, copromoters Mike Fornelli
and Corey Ham
work to guarantee
a professionally
produced spectacular
that has won awards
as Preliminary of the
Year for the past two
years. Not bad for a
pageant franchise that’s
existed for just three
years.
Fornelli explained what this
pageant means. “The winner is
expected to represent Arizona at the National
level to the best of her ability. She will also
be expected to attend, promote and oversee
all USofA events held here in Arizona. Giving
back to the community is so very important, so
she will also hold fundraisers over the course
of her reign, and help groom new girls in
preparation of next years’ pageant season.”
Miss Mya McKenzie, the reigning Miss Gay
Arizona USofA described her experience,
saying, “It was amazing! It also showed me
how important the First Alternate position
is.” McKenzie received the title when the
winner withdrew for health reasons. She also
encourages the contestants. “Always strive
66
www.IONAZ.com January 2010
to be the best and never say, ‘I can’t,’
because the next Miss Gay Arizona USofA
could be the next Miss Gay USofA.”
ION asked Fornelli how pageants impact
the GLBT community. “These pageants
are important because they helped put
Arizona on the map in the pageant world.
This recognition brings big name out-ofstate talent to the Valley, as well as allowing
our Arizona talent to be invited
to perform and represent
Arizona in other parts of
the country. This benefits
the gay community
everywhere
entertainment-wise,
fundraising-wise, and
by having symbols
of excellence that
give them a voice
all over the
country,” he
said.
This year’s
audience can expect
some amazing talent and
breathtaking beauty and grace
in the art of female illusion, Fornelli
guarantees. “In the words of Tina Turner,”
he said, “It’s simply the best.” Tajma Hall,
Miss Gay USofA at Large 2009 and Lucinda
Holiday, Miss Gay AZ USofA at Large 2008
will act as the pageant’s Mistresses of
Ceremonies.
After the contestants spectacular
performances, the interviews, costuming,
and a lot of hard work, there’s only one Miss
Gay Arizona USofA. We asked Mike Fornelli
what his favorite part of the pageant is.
“The crowning! The crowns are stunning!
Sheldon McMeekan is the
Miss Gay
Scottsdale USofA
Nevaeh McKenzie
Miss Gay
Scottsdale USofA
First Alternate
Kayla Krawford
Western regional Director for the USofA system and a nationally qualified
tabulator. He calculates the scores, so I never see them - barring any
technicalities. I find out who wins at the same time you do. I love being
surprised! The prize packages for the winners both total over $2,500.”
At press time local contestants who’ve qualified to compete in
the pageant are Neveah and first alternate Kayla Krawford
in addition to Olivia Gardens, who serves as Miss Gay
Phoenix and first alternate Saché Van Cartier. The
irrepressible Masquerade will compete
in the Classic. More ION asked
Fornelli if he would venture to
make any predictions who’ll
win the crown.
Miss Gay
Phoenix USofA
First Alternate
Saché Van Cartier *
Miss Gay
Phoenix USofA
Olivia Gardens
“Hell no!” he answered.
“Although I will say that these
girls are not playing; they are
amazing, and best of luck to
everyone! It will be a tough job for
the judges.”
The suspense is killing us. We hope it
lasts forever.
The pageant will be a double crowning in the
Grande Ballroom of the Wyndham Downtown
Phoenix on Sunday, January 31st at 6 p.m.
Tickets and tables are available through Mike
Fornelli and Corey Ham by e-mailing Mike@BSWest.
com or they can be purchased online at www.
BrownPaperTickets.com/event/90901
Sponsorship packets are also available at Mike@
BSWest.com. For more information, and photos
of the Arizona USofA pageant system, go to www.
myspace.com/missgayarizonaUSofA
Miss Kobalt
Masquerade
Photography Jerry O’Conner
Art Direction Kevin Bushaw
*Photograph by Brian Collins
68
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www.IONAZ.com 69
T H E L E AT H E R M E N
P h oto s - J e r ry O ’ Co n n e r | A rt - K e v i n B u s h aw | M a k e u p - A n to n K h ac h at u r i a n & Da n i M a h
M o d e l s a r e D e r i c k , G ag e , K e n , Z a n e , R i c k y, S e r g i o & Rya n | L e at h e r p r ov i d e d by O f f C h u t e To o
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T h e L e at h e r m e n a r e a g o g o da n c e t r o u p e f o u n d e d i n O c to b e r ‘ 0 8 by G ag e a n d D e r i c k ( p i c t u r e d A b ov e )
January 2010
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January 2010
Vol. 3, Issue 10
JANUARY 2010
OUTRAGEOUS!
OUTRAGEOUS!
Unfair and unbalanced. We decide.
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
B.S. West to Celebrate
Founder’s Day
SCOTTSDALE
– Picture it. Sicily.
1918. A young
peasant boy
stows away on an
steamship headed
for the New World.
While on board,
he mixes gin,
carbonated water
and lime juice,
creating the first
Gin Rickey. He
also invents the
Harvey Wallbanger, Pink Squirrel, Sloe
Comfortable Screw Against the Wall, and
the Mafia. All but one is a cocktail. As an
added bonus, he gives passengers a small
bullet to redeem for another drink between
2-8 p.m. on weekdays, calling it, “Ora
Contento” or “Happy Hour.”
That young entrepreneur
was none other than
Benidetto Salvatore
Westolini. This
handsome, Sicilian,
bachelor bartender’s
fashionable watering
hole has been a favorite
speakeasy ever since.
Who was that young
man? Records reveal
that his name was
changed when he
became a citizen to the
more American sounding “B.S. West.”
OUTRAGEOUS!
And his bar? Researching business
records and liquor licenses of yesteryear
show that the this very same tavern still
stands in downtown Scottsdale today,
greatly remodeled and named after it’s
namesake. Owner Mike Fornelli, who
Living
briefly
in
Pittsburgh,
Pennsylvania,
bearsIS
anTRAGICALLY
uncanny resemblance
to the
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH
ACCIDENTAL
this enterprising young man set up a small,
ancestral barkeep of long ago is proud of his
but popular saloon in the West’s Most
forefather, B.S. West.
Western Town, a sleepy little hamlet called
Scottsdale in the young state of Arizona.
“I’m thrilled with this discovery, our rich
Attractive, single young men and Mama’s
heritage, and our Founding Father, B.S.
Boys from miles away would congregate
West. We look forward to celebrating
here to listen to songs like, “Let’s Square
Founder’s Day very soon. And I promise
Dance” by the day’s songbird Grandma
nobody will get whacked. But you may not
GaGa and make out in the parking stable.
remember much the day after.”
OUTRAGEOUS!
OUTRAGEOUS!
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
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www.IONAZ.com 81
OUTRAGEOUS!
Obamas Crash Party.
Family in Uproar
OUTRAGEOUS!
OUTRAGEOUS!
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
FALLS CHURCH, Va.- An ordinarily
quiet Virginia community just beyond the
Beltway of Washington, D.C. was shocked
and surprised when Pres. and Mrs. Obama
unexpectedly crashed a birthday party
reception for Mrs. Annie Culpepper, 68,
visiting from Omaha, Nebraska.
Mrs. Starr was only planning on twelve
guests, but the President and First Lady’s
arrival threw a wrench into the works. “We
didn’t invite them! We don’t have enough
cake or snacks for them,” said Starr. “They
told my nephew I called them personally,
but that’s not true. We can’t figure out how
they got in here.”
OUTRAGEOUS!
“I couldn’t believe it!” said her daughter,
ANY
TOwork
THE TRUTH
TRAGICALLY
ACCIDENTAL
Mrs.IS
Culpepper’s
grandson,
Orville, who is
Trudy RESEMBLANCE
Starr. “I went to so much
organizing this party, sending out
invitations, making sure everybody had
somewhere to sit, punch, and a piece of
cake. Next thing you know, in waltzes the
President and his wife, like they own the
place! I gave my nephew, Harlan, a copy of
the guest list, and he was supposed to check
them off as they came in. He said it was
his sister’s fault, that it was her job. I don’t
know how this happened!”
on the high school wrestling team quietly
escorted the First Couple out of the house
without incident.
Neighbors suspect that Pres. and Mrs.
Obama schemed to get into the party so that
they could get their own reality show that
takes place in the White House. Uh ... wait
a minute ...
OUTRAGEOUS!
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www.IONAZ.com January 2010
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
OUTRAGEOUS!
Tiger Woods Opens
Strip Club Chain
OUTRAGEOUS!
OUTRAGEOUS!
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
WINDERMERE, Fla. – Tiger Woods, the once
fabled golden boy of that exciting game of golf
announced that he is on hiatus. He hopes to
repair his marriage, which is in shambles after
a string of infidelities with loose women of ill
repute was reported.
Miss California USA Carrie Prejean, the bustiest
Christian in America.
Investors in Wood’s venture include “The
Love Gov,” South Carolina’s Governor Mark
Sanford, Late Night host and philanderer David
Letterman and the whore with a heart of gold,
The new gentlemen’s entertainment clubs will
be sponsored by condom manufacturers Durex,
LifeStyles, Trojan and Kimono as well as Viagra.
OUTRAGEOUS!
Former Wood’s sponsor Electronic Arts video
game “Tiger Woods PGA Golf Tour” have been
pulled. Execs promise the game will be revamped
and marketed as, “Tiger Woods’ Big Divot”
where players can pit their skills, seeing who
Major sponsors like, AT&T, Gillette, Nike,
can bag more waitresses, promoters and other
Gatorade and others have dropped the
ANY
RESEMBLANCE
TO resulting
THE TRUTH
ISwithin
TRAGICALLY
ACCIDENTAL
skanks
allotted time. “The
more holes you
philandering
golfer from their rosters,
can get your wood in, the better,” said one game
in the loss of hundreds of thousands of dollars in
developer.
income for the famed duffer. In order to recoup
the loss of income, Woods announced that he’ll
Upper Deck, the promotional manufacturer of
be opening a chain of strip clubs along the
Eastern Seabord called “Tiger’s Hole-in-One
“bobble heads” is re-“tooling” the Woods’ figure
to create a new “bobble” feature that will wiggle.
Strip Joint & Driving School.”
OUTRAGEOUS!
84
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January 2010 www.IONAZ.com
85
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY
ACCIDENTAL
Make
Yourself
a Better
Catch
Before you jump into the dating pool,
you might want to take a look inward
first. Knowing who you are, and what
you want to work on helps make you
a better catch – and ultimately, a
better date. So get out your TO DO
list. No one’s perfect. We all have
flaws. A few of these tips might help.
READ MORE
Give Reality TV and US Magazine
a rest and pick up a novel, news
magazine, or read an online
newspaper. The more you know,
the more you’ll have to talk about
on a date. Most people will say
intelligence is attractive. It’s probably
in the top five of qualities most
singles are looking for. If you’re
informed and well read, you’ll at
least seem smart, and you can
avoid those awkward pauses in
conversation during a date. If you
can’t bring yourself to read, buy
a pair of Gucci glasses with clear
lenses – and pretend to be smart.
Illusion is everything.
CONTROL THE
DRINKING AND
SMOKING
You might think an ashtray mouth is
OK or a funny drunk is cute, but it
probably won’t lead to finding a quality
mate. That cute guy won’t think you’re
as attractive when you slur your words
and blow smoke in his face. Leave
the cigs in the car. And with a few less
drinks you won’t have to wonder if you
had beer goggles on the night before,
when he calls you the next day.
BE POSITIVE
You may blame your parents for
screwing up your childhood, still
be angry with your ex, or hate your
boss, but no one wants to hear your
complaining. Negativity is a big
turn off if you’re trying to attract a
quality date. Save the moaning for
the therapist’s chair or your closest
friends. Your friends probably don’t
want to constantly hear your negativity
either, but at least they’ll understand. A
positive attitude and a few kind words
go a long way to making you a better
catch.
STOP SLEEPING AROUND
OR AT LEAST STOP
TALKING ABOUT IT
So you’re constantly hooking up. We
all have needs. But if you’re known
as the guy who’ll sleep with anyone,
eventually no one will want to sleep
with you. A little discretion goes a long
way and your potential dates don’t
want to hear ALL the intimate details of
your many encounters. Let your date
find out for himself that you’re a stud,
instead of hearing that you’re a slut.
VOLUNTEER
No matter how bad you may think
you have it, there’s always someone
less fortunate than you. Call it karma.
Whatever you give, comes back to you
in greater returns. And who knows,
maybe you’ll meet that perfect date in a
soup kitchen line or at a charity event.
LEAVE SOMETHING TO
THE IMAGINATION
If your stack of porn is larger than your
TV, you’ve probably killed your sexual
imagination, and set your standards
way too high when looking for a mate.
Drop dead gorgeous, hung like a horse
with 8 pack abs isn’t a very realistic
standard. Porn stars mate with porn
stars anyways. And those provocative
photos you have posted online
probably won’t leave a potential mate
wanting more when they’ve seen it all
before meeting you. Leaving something
to the imagination will make you more
attractive and a better catch.
Post
your
online
or
voicemail
profile
for
FREE on Megamates and
Gaymates. Our phone dating
line and online dating website
offer singles a fun, interactive place
to call, chat, and connect. It’s free
to setup and maintain a mailbox or
online account, free to record a public
message and free to browse other
caller’s profiles and messages. Call
1-888-MEGAMATES, use FREE
code 7286 or visit us online at www.
gaymates.com
© 2008 Progressive Computing LLC
86
www.IONAZ.com January 2010
January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 87
IONPHOENIX
1.
1.
Amsterdam
Amsterdam
718 N. Central Ave. - Downtown Phoenix
(602) 258-6122
2.
2.
Apollo’s
Apollo’s
5749 N. 7th St. - Phoenix
(602) 277-9373
3.
3.
NEW!
Bar
1 Babylon Showclub
3613
Buren,
Phoenix, AZ‎ 3708 E
N.Van
16th
St. - Phoenix
(602) 306-1000‎
266-9001
4.
4.
1
BSBar
West
3702
St. --Phoenix
7125 N.
E. 16th
5th Ave.
Scottsdale
(602)
266-9001
(480) 945-9028
5.
5.
BS West
Bunkhouse
7125
Scottsdale
4428 E.
N. 5th
7th Ave.
Ave. -- Phoenix
(480)
(602) 945-9028
200-9154
6.
6.
Bunkhouse
Cash
Inn
4428
7th Ave. - Phoenix
2140 N.
E. McDowell
Rd. - Phoenix
(602)
(602) 200-9154
244-9943
7.
7.
Cash Inn
Charlie’s
2140
E. Camelback
McDowell Rd.
727 W.
Rd.--Phoenix
Phoenix
(602)
244-9943
(602) 265-0224
8.
8.
Charlie’s
Cherry
Bar
727
Rd.Rd.
- Phoenix
1028W.
E.Camelback
Indian School
- Phoenix
(602)
(602) 265-0224
277-7729
9.
9.
Cherry Bar
Cherry Lounge 1028 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 277-7729
Every Thursday starting January 11th - Mill Ave. in Tempe
10.
10.
Cherry Lounge The Chute Men’s Club
Every Thursday at 9pm on Mill Ave. in Tempe
1440 E Indian School Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 234-1654
C11.
The Chute Men’s Club
Clarendon Hotel
1440 E Indian School Rd. - Phoenix
401 W. Clarendon Ave. - Phoenix
(602) 234-1654
(602) CLARENDON
12.
11.
Club Vibe
Club Vibe
3031 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix
3031 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 224-9977
(602) 224-9977
13.
12.
14.
13.
15.
14.
16.
15.
17.
16.
18.
17.
19.
18.
20.
19.
21.
20.
22.
21.
23.
Cruisin’ 7th
Cruisin’
7th
Dick’s Cabaret
Dick’s Cabaret
Dick’s II
The Door
Flex Private Men’s Club
Forbidden
Forbidden
Homme
Homme
icepics videobar
icepics videobar
Incognito
Incognito
Karamba
Karamba
Kobalt
Kobalt
OZ
NEW! Nu Towne
3702 N. 7th St. - Phoenix
3702 N. 7th St. - Phoenix
3432 E. Illini Rd. - Phoenix
3432 E. Illini Rd. - Phoenix
2438 E. McDowell - Phoenix
1126 N. Scottsdale Rd. - Tempe
1517 S Black Canyon Hwy - Phoenix
6820 E. 5th Ave. - Scottsdale
6820 E. 5th Ave. - Scottsdale
138 W. Camelback Rd. - Phoenix
138 W. Camelback Rd. - Phoenix
3108 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix
3108 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix
2424 E. Thomas Rd. - Phoenix
2424 E. Thomas Rd. - Phoenix
1724 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix
1724 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix
3110 N. Central Ave. - Phoenix
3110 N. Central Ave. - Phoenix
1804 W. Bethany Home Rd. - Phoenix
5002 E Van Buren St, Phoenix, AZ‎ (602) 212-9888
(602) 212-9888
(602) 274-DICK
(602) 274-DICK
(602) 437-DICK
(480) 967-DOOR
(602) 271-9011
forbiddenaz.com
forbiddenaz.com
(602) 266-0875
(602) 266-0875
(602) 267-8707
(602) 267-8707
(602) 955-9805
(602) 955-9805
(602) 254-0231
(602) 254-0231
(602) 264-5307
(602) 264-5307
(602) 242-5114
(602) 267-9959
22.
24.
Plazma
OZ
1560 E. Osborn Rd. - Phoenix
1804 W. Bethany Home Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 266-0477
(602) 242-5114
23.
25.
Pumphouse II
Plazma
4132 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix
1560 E. Osborn Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 275-3509
(602) 266-0477
24.
26.
Retro Bar
Pumphouse II
3114 E. Cactus Rd. - Phoenix
4132 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 493-0355
(602) 275-3509
25.
The Rock
4129 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix
Radisson Phoenix City Center 3600 N. 2nd Ave. - Phoenix
Roscoe’s
4531 N.N.7th
St.Creek
- Phoenix
Rainbow Cactus
15615
Cave
Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 248-8559
(602) 604-4900
15615N.N.7th
Cave
Creek
Rd. - Phoenix
4129
Ave.
- Phoenix
(602) 248-8559
867-2463
(602)
28.
29.
Rainbow
Cactus
The Rock
Velocity
Roscoe’s
2303 N.
E. Indian
Rd. - Phoenix
4531
7th St.School
- Phoenix
(602) 285-0833
956-2885
(602)
29.
30.
Wild
Card Velocity
801 N.E.Arizona
Ave. - Chandler
2303
Indian School
Rd. - Phoenix
(480) 956-2885
857-3088
(602)
30.
31.
Z ZGirl
GirlClub
Club
4301 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix (602) 265-3233
26.
27.
27.
28.
88
www.IONAZ.com January 2010
(602) 285-0833
(602)
867-2463
January 2010 www.IONAZ.com 89
IONBAR GUIDE
PHOENIX
FRIDAY
DRINK RESPONSIBLY.
Discount Cab:
Yellow Cab:
AAA Cab:
MONDAY
602-200-2000
602-252-5252
602-437-4000
SATURDAY
SUNDAY
TUESDAY
WEDNESDAY
THURSDAY
Amsterdam
Amsterdam’s Signature Night
Happy Hour 4-7pm
Dance - No Cover!
$3 Smirnoff cocktails until Mid.
Arts, Industry & ION VIP Night
1/2 price drinks *KARAOKE*
Martinis & Manicures
$5 Martinis
Arts, Industry & ION VIP Night
1/2 price drinks
College Night
1/2 price drinks with student ID
Divas Live!
$3 Diva Shots during the show
Apollo’s*
Comedy Clips 6pm
Karaoke 9pm
$1 Bud Light Drafts 2-8p
Karaoke 9pm
$1 Bud Light Drafts 2-8p
Male Strippers 10:30pm
All Day All Night
2 for 1 U Call-It Open-Close
‘Tini Tuesdays
2-4-1 Call Martinis Open-Close
Jock Night Wii Challenge
$4 u-call-it
Karaoke 9pm
Happy Hour 8-8 $2.75 well/dom
NEW! Babylon
Friday 8pm - 4am
Saturday 8pm - 4am
NEVAEH Host’s Amateur Stripper
Sunday 8pm - 2am
Monday 8pm - 2am
$2 dom./$3 import/$5 Martini
Tuesday 8pm - 2am
$5 U-Call-It
Wednesday 8pm - 2am
2-4-1
Thursday 8pm - 2am
NEVAEH’s Drag Show
BS West*
FUBAR with Elements 9:45p
$5 you call it drink & $3 beers
2-4-1 everything all night
Go-go dancers - A new tradition
Karaoke 9pm
$1 Miller Lite drafts
W.H.O.R.E. Service Industry
$2 dom $3 well $4 bombers
Community Benefit/Fundraiser
Book you event @ bswest.com
2-4-1 All Day and All Night
A valley tradion!
Karaoke 9pm
$2 drafts
Charlie’s
$3 pitchers/2-4-1 well/dom 2-7p
$1 Happy Hour 7-9p/Afterhours
$3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom 12-7p
$1 Happy Hour 7-9p/Afterhours
Volleyball 4-7pm, NEW 3-4-1
$3 Long Islands, $3 pitchers
Underwear Party 8-cl 1/2 price
2-8pm $3 pitch. 2-4-1 well/dom
2-8p $3 pitch./2-4-2 well/dom
8p-Close 2-4-1 cocktails/dom
2-8p $3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom
8p-close $3 Pinnacle
2-4-1 All Day!
Cocktails and beer
until 1am
Scandalesque Burlesque Show 2-4-1
Mill Avenue - Tempe
Cherry Lounge Mill Ave. - Downtwon Tempe
Dick’s Cabaret
2-4-1 VIP Dances
7pm ‘til 9pm
Off the Hook
Tons of Prizes & Giveaways
2-4-1 Cover Charge, Dances &
VIP Wristbands
2-4-1 Cover Charge, Dances,
VIP Wristbands
Amateur Night
Starts at 10pm
S.I.N. Bring Your Dancer ID
and get VIP Pricing
Hot Studs All Night Long
$5.00 Off with VIP Keychain
Dick’s II
$1 Dances at Midnight
Tons of Prizes & Giveaways
2-4-1 Dances
2-4-1 Dances
ION VIP Night
Amatuer Night
Wack Wednesdays
ION VIP Night
EZ Happy Hour 4-6:30pm
2-4-1 well, draft, beer & marg.
EZ Happy Hour 4-6:30pm
2-4-1 well, draft, beer & marg.
Uncorked Sundays
50% off bottles of wine
M3 Mondays
2-4-1 signature margaritas
Svedka Tuesdays
$5 Svedka Tuesdays
Late Night EZ Hour 10-mid
2-4-1 well, draft, bottle & marg.
Late Night EZ Hour 10-mid
2-4-1 well, draft, bottle & marg.
Forbidden
Fresh Fridays
21+ no cover / 18+ $8 cover
The Barbra Seville Show
& no cover 80s dance party
Sports Beer Bust & BBQ
+ Trash Disco / $1 drafts
Closed Mondays
Open Tuesday-Sunday 4p-2a
Am Idol Happy Hour 4-9pm
Karaoke w/ Brad 9pm
Am Idol Happy Hour 4-9pm
Team Trivia 8pm
Inferno Thursday 18 + night
$4 wells, $4 Hornitos shots
icepics
MEAT - Go Go Boys/Strippers
$3 Wells, $4 Lng Isl., $2 Dom.
The Follies 10pm
Great SKYY Drink Specials
Legendary Show Tunes Sunday
$3 Wells/ $1.50 Drafts
Comedy Night
2-4-1 well / beer (8p-2a)
Mustache Ride First Tuesday
2-4-1 well / beer
Karaoke $4 martinis & Lng Isl.
$3 Well/$2 Domestic Bottle
HOT ASS Best ass wins $100
2-4-1 well / beer (8p-2a)
Incognito
Progressive Soulful House
2-4-1 Drinks Afterhours until 4
DJs UNITY & SOCIAL-Afterhours DJ Tsunami & Grown and Sexy
Diverse:City Local DJs 8p
Industrial, electronic & undergr.
Closed
Closed
Industry Night 2-4-1 Specials
“The Men of Incog” Male Review
The World Club 18+
Dance party + afterours until 4a
The Leathermen
Velocity
10:30p - 1:30a
Cruisn’ 7th |
Plazma
4:30p - 7:00p | 10:30p - 1:30p
Velocity
9:00p - 11:00p
Charlies
10:00p- 1:00a
R Maizie’s
Happy Hour
3-6pm Everyday
Happy Hour Brunch 9a-2p
3-6pm Everyday
Brunch All Day
$3 Bistro Burgers
$10.00 off of all Bottled Wines
Tuesday Night Fish & Chips
Wednesday BBQ Short Ribs
Selected Beers $3 Starts @ 5pm Selected Beers $3 Starts @ 5pm
Happy Hour
3-6pm Everyday
R Mi Patio
Fridays
$1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Saturdays
$1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Sundays
$1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Mondays
$1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Tuesdays
$1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Wednesdays
$1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Thursdays
$1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Karamba
Fridays
$4 Pitchers
Saturdays
$4 Pitchers
Sundays with Galilea
$3 pitchers
Closed
Tejano Tuesdays
$2.00 Drinks All Night
Wednesdays with Diamond
$2 Drinks All Night
Thursdays with Susanna
$3 pitchers
Pumphouse II
Bottoms Up Fridays
2-4-1 all drinks
Hot Bodz Male Revue
Hosted by Savannah
Sundays
$1.50 Well & Domestic
Mondays
2-4-1 7-close
Tuesdays
Dart tournament
Wednesdays
2-4-1 well & domestic
Hot Bodz Male Revue
Hosted by Savannah
The Rock
Karaoke @ 10 Poker @ 7
$5 Martinis 7pm-midnight
Diamond Dolls Mya McKenzie
$4 Bomber/$3.50 3 Olive Drinks
Rock your Funday Sunday
Tea dance, DJ, specials, food
Lady’s Night Free pool
$1 Miller Lite Drft, $4.50 Bomb.
Guys Night Out
Happy hour all day long
Industry Night
$2 Well & Domestic $3 Bombs
Poker Night $3.50 Long Islands
$1 Off Draft Pitchers
R Roscoe’s*
All Star Grill Specials
Great Happy Hour
All Star Grill
Opens at 11am
$8 Sunday Brunch
$8 Long Island Pitchers
Monday
Pool Tournament
2 for Tuesdays
2-4-1 drinks all day
Wednesday
All Day Happy Hour
Thursdays
2-4-1 7pm
R Switch
Fridays
Open from 11am-Midnight
Saturday
Open from 11am-Midnight
Sundays
Open from 11am-Midnight
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CLUBS, RESTAURANTS, AND NIGHTLIFE
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Ain’t Nobody’s Biz
Colors Howl at the Moon
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2449 N. Stone
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ACCOMODATIONS & LODGING
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Doubletree Hotel at Reid Park
Embassy Suites
La Posada Lodge and Casitas
Royal Elizabeth B&B
The Westin La Paloma
January 2010
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by Addison DeWitt
Last month I witnessed
the mass exodus of nearly every
gay boy under the age of 30 leaving
Phoenix to see Lady Gaga in San
Diego. It was like seeing Moses leading
the Israelites out of Egypt. I didn’t go. I
didn’t need to. I could sit in the comfort
of my mobile home at the WonderVu
Trailer Court and see pirated video
of the concert posted for broadcast
on Facebook over and over and over
again by every queen who
went or wished he went.
Instead I stayed here.
So I could report
everything I know
– which admittedly
isn’t much – to you. I
know you’re riveted.
That tall, dark
and handsome
Syrian beauty Eric
Nashawaty celebrated
his birthday at Babylon
where the go-go boys spirited
him up on stage for a “Pole Dance”
he’ll never forget. And neither will they,
I bet. Word on the street is that Eric is
single and is looking to comingle. (Hey,
there’s only a few words that rhyme
with ‘single’ that make sense.)
For the Holidays most of us get gifts
like a shirt, a bottle of cologne, a book,
or gift certificates. I got crabs one year,
but that’s a different story. The winner
of The Best Christmas Gift Ever In
The Whole Wide World goes to the
oh-so-scrumptious Eric Shorter. His
boyfriend, Ryan McCarthy, the humpo-licious day bartender at Charlie’s, got
Eric an albino rat. His name is “Sprite.”
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www.IONAZ.com January 2010
Isn’t that what everyone dreams about
getting? Kids, I think the moral of the
story is this: don’t tell Ryan when,
say, your birthday is. You might get a
garter snake, a salamander, or some
other kind of creature that you won’t
be expecting. But if you’re lucky – and
that’s a big “if” – it might be a gerbil.
(“Oh, no he didn’t!” you say. Yes. I did.)
The Phoenix Metropolitan Men’s
Chorus and their Philharmonic
Ensemble staged a spectacular
holiday concert which
was sold out. Lending
a hand – actually
two – was their sign
language interpreter,
the divine Alex
Chambers
(pictured). I’d like
for Alex to interpret
“Love Is A Many
Splendored Thing” all
over my sweaty body
with his strong, soft,
warm, supple hands. (Yes. I
did. Again.)
After one performance the chorus
and the entire audience sang “Happy
Birthday” to Apollo’s own Lee Revelle.
I remember when the entire community
of the WonderVu Trailer Court sang it
to me. Not the same, I can tell you. Not
quite the same.
The PMMC’s next big concert is the
weekend of June 25-27 when they’ll
be performing an entire concert of
Elton John music. Why on a weekend?
Because everybody knows that
“Saturday Night’s Alright for Fightin’.”
A little Elton John humor there. Okay,
January 2010
www.IONAZ.com 95
and a fabulous drag show.
very little. But plan on seeing it.
We hear that the darling Teddy
Gandert was in the Big Apple
scratching “New Year’s Eve at Times
Square” off his Bucket List. But
what we’re really dying to
know, Teddy dear, is did you
get to scratch CNN talking
head, Gloria Vanderbilt’s
oh-so-eligible bachelor
Anderson Cooper’s goldplated bucket at midnight?
If anybody could, it’s you,
Teddy.
As a celebrated, award
winning journalist, you
can imagine that
my New Year’s
Eve schedule
is packed.
The invitations
poured in from
Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, the Olson
Twins and the Jonas Brothers. But
where did I go? Where? I’m telling
you, I stayed here right in my own
hometown and rang in the New Year
with my friends at Pumphouse. Of
course, the fact that they had the
fabulous Ranger Dale pouring tankardsize 2-for-1 drinks behind the bar, a
delicious late night buffet, hot strippers,
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www.IONAZ.com January 2010
Speaking of fabulous drag ... the
Party Penguin of the Month is
Pumphouse’s Drag Queen in
Residence, the original, one-of-a-kind,
one-and-only, irrepressible Savannah
Stevens! Whether she’s
performing as Cyndi Lauper,
her amazingly uncanny Cher,
a spot-on Reba McEntyre, or
that wacky Amy Winehouse,
the chameleon-like Savannah
gives it her all and makes
everybody feel right at home at
Pumphouse.
If only my home had
strippers, drag shows and a
full bar. But I do have
a DVD player, some
blue movies, one of my
mother’s old half-slips,
a brassiere and some
Kool-Aid. Hey, it’s a start.
Throw your New Year’s Resolutions
away. Who are you kidding in the first
place? You’re still gonna sleep around.
I just wish I knew someone who
could teach me erotic American Sign
Language. If only I knew somebody ...
somebody ... Any ideas? If so, e-mail
Addison at [email protected]
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January 2010 www.IONAZ.com 97
Libra Sep. 23 - Oct. 22
Aries Mar. 21 - Apr. 20
A secret will be revealed this month. But
it just might be about something you did
that you don’t necessarily want everybody
to know about. But you’ll find the damage
control will bring you a reward you weren’t
expecting. See? It all works out.
Taurus Apr. 21 - May 20
Play Indian chief this month and you’ll get
heap big wampum. Just don’t get scalped
in the process. Send out some sexy smoke
signals and you’ll discover that someone
wants to spend some time in your teepee
with you. Show ‘em the peace pipe.
Gemini May 21 - June 21
Both of your faces are gorgeous, Gemini! If
somehow you can get both of them to agree
what to have for lunch, you’re off to a good
start. I recommend the Turkey and Swiss,
with a hot Aquarian on the side.
Cancer June 22 - July 22
The New Year brings many opportunities
for you. It could be getting in a bar fight
with a drag queen or winning an amateur
stripper contest. Whatever it is, you better
make sure there are no cameras around to
capture the moment.
Leo July 23 - Sep. 22
Something great is in store for you! It
may be a parade in your honor. You’ll find
that you have a bigger fan club than you
imagined. And not just on Facebook. In real
life, too. Honest!
Virgo Aug. 23 - Sep. 22
You’re a born entertainer. You’re kind of a
cross between Liza Minnelli and someone
else, we’re not quite sure who. You’re the
life of the party, but please don’t dance
around with the lampshade on your head
anymore.
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January 2010
The New Year has given you pause to
consider your finances. Pay off a debt. The
sky’s the limit – but don’t go overboard. Kiss
a stranger on the lips. You’ll be pleasantly
surprised at what happens.
Scorpio Oct. 23 - Nov. 23
Your sense of adventure leaves everybody
thrilled. You may swing in on a vine, like
Tarzan, or storm through the door Rambo
style. Your swashbuckling zest for life
amazes even your harshest. A certain starryeyed blonde is putty in your hands.
Sagittarius Nov. 23 - Dec. 23
Even when you’re drunk, nobody’s gonna
believe that you’re the rightful heir to the
throne of England. Curb those little white
lies and concentrate on honesty. Oh, but
everybody totally believes that story about
you and the bartender, though.
Capricorn Dec. 23 - Jan. 20
Your caring warmth and genuine empathy
has everyone believing that you’re Oprah.
You can drop the act, because those in
the know have you figured out. Maybe it’s
too much sugar. Maybe it’s a mild case of
schizophrenia. But if you go to the Dept. of
Motor Vehicles you’ll snap right out of it. We
love the real you.
Aquarias Jan. 21 - Feb. 19
Your imaginary friends are worried about
you. Your flight to the Aurora Borealis was
canceled, but a quick road trip to the West
Coast is in the picture this year. And maybe
with a kookie Gemini.
Pisces Feb. 20 - Mar. 20
You don’t have to know everybody’s
business. If you play your cards right,
everyone will tell you everything you want
to know. Make sure you keep one or two
nuggets of info to yourself. And don’t pick
your nose, because – no, you’re not paranoid
– everybody really is watching you.
January 2010 www.IONAZ.com 99