Local council plans student ghetto
Issue 1194 Monday 12 October 2009 www.thecourieronline.co.uk
The paps are out: who’s been causing a stir on campus?
News, page 7
Local council plans student ghetto
such as Jesmond and Heaton.
Liberal Democrat councillors claim
that their ‘Living and Learning in
Newcastle’ strategy will increase
choice, drive down rents and improve living conditions.
A plan for similar purpose-built
student blocks was originally proposed in 2007, as reported in The
Courier, but eventually fell through.
The Labour opposition called for
further debate on the strategy which
they believe could put people off
studying in the city.
Labour’s leader Nick Forbes told
The Chronicle, “Our concern is that
this strategy is not ambitious enough
and only sees students as a problem
in terms of housing, rather than as
an asset to the community”.
He continued, “The Lib Dems
seem to think that driving students
out of areas such as Jesmond and
Heaton will free up properties for
family housing. Landlords will not
sell these properties; they will just
rent them out to other groups of
people. All it will do is replace one
set of issues with another”.
However, Liberal Democrat Councillor Bill Shepherd insisted they
were not trying to force students out
of certain areas of the city.
Shepherd told The Chronicle, “We
are aiming to ensure students in
Newcastle have access to safe, wellmanaged and decent accommodation, while balancing the needs and
welfare of residents”.
At the meeting on Friday he denied
the council were trying to dictate
where students lived and said he
would welcome further discussions
between all parties on the matter.
The city of Newcastle encompasses two universities and is home to
37,000 students in full time education, giving it the highest proportion
of full-time students to population
of any of England’s largest cities.
Council chiefs say that over the
last decade the number of students
living in rented accommodation has
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been built. As a result of this, the
council says it wants to make sure
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Students at the meeting said they
felt they were being unfairly hounded out of communities.
Newcastle Union’s Student SupSRUW 2IÀFHU 3HWH 0HUFHU ZKR DOVR
attended told The Courier, “This document clearly isn’t about a shortage
of student housing because there
isn’t one; we haven’t got students
living on the street.
“If having students living in communities is really becoming a problem, we need to resolve those issues”.
Tensions between students and
residents in local communities such
as Jesmond and Heaton have risen
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in the number of complaints made
Jesmond resident Bobbie Harding
told The Courier, “I think the solution to this is along the lines of the
strategy presented today. This will
help to lessen the tensions”.
She continued, “There’s a difference in lifestyle between students
and residents, which is understandable. I don’t expect or want students
to come back at 12 o’clock at night,
but you can’t have families and
working people next to each other”.
“The problem is numbers. Sheer
overwhelming numbers. In the
summer, there are few permanent
residents. It has stopped being a
Continued on page 7
Comment on page 10
Ross Moodie tribute
BNP on the BBC?
Out with the old?
Royals lose opener
Friends of the late Ross Moodie have
paid their respects after the former
Boat Club member’s tragic accident.
News, pages 4 and 5
Yes / No debates whether or not the
on Question Time later this month.
Comment, page 11
Why drink and Facebook make it
to succeed at university.
Life & Style, page 14
brings to you an exclusive interview with
Sunderland band The Futureheads.
Culture, page 19
A late penalty saw Newcastle’s
men’s rugby union side slip to
home defeat against Leeds Met.
Sport, page 44
> Proposal to rehouse
Simon Murphy &
Students clashed with local councillors and residents over new housing
proposals set forward by the Liberal
Democrat led council.
The plans, which would see purpose-built blocks catering for 5,000
students in Newcastle, were challenged by Labour opposition councillors in a call-in which was defeated by three votes to one on Friday
Critics claimed the proposed housing plan sought to drive students
out of residential parts of the city,
Inside today >>>
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
The Union Society, King’s Walk, Newcastle
upon Tyne, NE1 8QB. Tel: 0191 239 3940
Not so Nobel
Research done by University
scientists is given the Ig Nobel prize
News Editors: Simon Murphy and Jessica Tully - [email protected]
Medical School celebrates 175th birthday
Hockey, as well as
Radio 2 presenter
29 and 33
Newcastle medical school celebrated its 175th anniversary with a bang
party for present and past pupils,
academics and NHS partners.
Newcastle School of Medicine
and Surgery (as it was then known)
started its humble beginnings with
26 students in a small building at
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the years, the medical school has
grown dramatically to its modern
state and is now currently training over 1,700 student doctors at
its present location in Framlington
The Medical school, which began
in 1834, was the founding institution for Newcastle University itself.
This makes Newcastle University
unique in being the only English
university to have begun life as a
Professor Chris Day, pro-vice
chancellor for the Faculty of Medical
Sciences at the University, said, “We
acknowledge the shared history we
have with our regional partners at
Durham University – the College of
Medicine was a Durham University
College from 1870 until 1963 – and
the regional hospitals that continue
to provide the practical training
ground for our trainee medical students.”
Professor Day added, “The medi-
Life & Style
Travel photo of the week
How you can win £10 worth
of photo prints as well as
a framed copy of your own
photograph by entering our
new weekly competition
coverage of the
opening day of the
Intra Mural football
and rugby season
Palmer and Nicholas Fidler
Felton and Ashley Fryer
Kath Harmer, Lucy Houlden, Anna Kenolty,
Charlotte Loftus, Emma Peasgood and Claire
Sport - 11am, Function Suite
News - 12pm, Function Suite
Comment - 12pm, Function Suite
Photos - 1pm, Function Suite
Film - 12.30pm, Committee Room B
Music - 1pm, Committee Room B
Arts - 12pm, Function Suite
The Courier is printed by: Harmsworth Printing Limited, Northcliffe House, Meadow
Road, Derby, DE1 2DW. Tel: 01332 253013.
Established in 1948, The Courier is the fully independent Student Newspaper of the Union
Society at the University of Newcastle-UponTyne. The Courier is published weekly during
term time, and is free of charge.
The design, text, photographs and graphics
are copyright of The Courier and its individual
contributors. No parts of this newspaper may
be reproduced without the prior permission
of the Editor. Any views expressed in this
newspaper’s opinion pieces are those of the
individual writing, and not of The Courier, the
Union Society or the University of Newcastleupon-Tyne.
cal school’s history is intrinsically
linked to the social and cultural development of Newcastle as a city and
the North-East region as a whole.
“As part of the cultural fabric of
the region, we plan to use the anniversary celebrations to get as many
people involved as possible over the
next few months.”
The medical school will be inviting
people from across the north-east
region to get involved in events organised to celebrate this important
Newcastle medical school is
viewed as one of the top medical
schools in the country closely folORZLQJ 2[IRUG &DPEULGJH DQG
University College London. It is also
world renowned for its research into
Debauchery night at
Popular student club night ‘Debauchery’, held on Fridays at Venue
has been shut down.
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have been ordered by the council to
close down the night for the second
time in two years.
The name ‘Debauchery’ was prohibited in 2007 as Police and local
authorities believed it to be irresponsible, encouraging heavy drinking
and unsuitable behaviour.
Councillor Anita Lower told The
Chronicle, “The whole idea of a
night like this is exactly the kind
of thing we are trying to get away
Promoters agreed to stop using
the word two years ago, changing
the night to ‘DB’. Recently, howHYHUSROLFHVSRWWHGÁ\HUVXVLQJWKH
original name, and alerted the City
Council licensing committee.
“Both the owner and the promot-
er of the night appeared before us
and have told us ‘never again’, so
it seems we have reached an agreement.” Anita Lower continued.
Although the name has been replaced again by ‘db’, the night will
continue with the same theme and
Promoters of the night announced,
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the name ‘debauchery’ has been
stopped, and from now on we have
rebranded the night as ‘db!’ Venue’s
legendary Friday nights will continue, as ever, the same as always, but
under the name ‘db!”
The ban comes after popular student club Attic was reprimanded in
the summer for introducing a night
named ‘Trashed’. Promotional material said the club aimed to help
attendees get “nailed, battered,
done-in and, well, proper ****ing
To ensure those attending would
drink as much alcohol as possible,
organisers planned to breathalyse
each person as they left. The most
intoxicated person would gain free
entry the following week, yet “if
you’re legal to drive at 3am”, the
promotion boasted, “we’ll refund
your entry money because in our
eyes you’re not Trashed, so we’ve
failed in our mission.”
Newcastle area commander Chief
Support Graham Smith told The
Chronicle, “In conjunction with
Newcastle City Council we responded promptly to the information received about this particular
drinks promotion and we have been
given assurances it will no longer go
some of the world’s biggest health
challenges, such as ageing, chronic
degenerative disease, neurological
problems, brain diseases and cancer, as well as research into genetics
and cell biology. It is adding to its
already global stance by building a
campus in Malaysia which will be
ready by 2011.
Bumps record attempt fails
Newcastle University kicked off
the start of term with record breaking ambitions as students from
around halls and campus took part
in a World Record Attempt of the
‘Biggest Game of Musical Bumps’.
Unfortunately, the attempt fell
just short of the world record but
the event proved to be a great day
with cheesy music and dancing in
the sunshine, including over 200
people taking part, and even more
The ‘Give it a Go’ event was organised by the Union’s Activities
Development Coordinator Emily
She told The Courier “I was really
pleased with the day! It was a fun
afternoon, and I’d like to thank all
the students who came along and
really got into the spirit of things.
I am planning now to run it again
on Union Day (coming up in November sometime…watch this
space) and we WILL break the
The eventual winner, 1st year
Law student Rebecca Gerrard, was
rewarded with a £20 HMV voucher, as well as the prestigious title of
Newcastle University’s best musical bumper.
She told The Courier “I saw it
in the paper and happened to be
walking past. It was really good
fun and a great way in get involved
with the Union.”
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Bean there, done that...
The baked bean- part of a staple diet
for many students. Just one tin sets
in motion a whole range of culinary
possibilities, from being served with
jacket potatoes, to the timeless classic of beans on toast.
Never has there been a more loyal
and honourable friend to vegetarians and meat eaters alike. There
truly are no boundaries to the use of
the little bean that punches above its
weight in nutritional value.
During Freshers’ Week enthusiastic students put this claim to the test
by jumping into a tub full of them.
The “bean bathing” spectacle took
place between the 23rd and 24th
September in the Union Basement,
and was part of a campaign by Taybarns restaurants, who were promoting an all you can eat buffet offer at £4.99 exclusive to students.
Speaking to The Courier, Helen
Treadwell, a representative of Taybarns, described the busy two day
event as a “brilliant and fun atmosphere” and was particularly impressed by the “no limits approach”
adopted by each of the brave bathers who took up the challenge.
What exactly was the motivation
behind the 14 brave souls who took
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nature of Freshers’ Week, where
caution is quite simply cast aside in
the pursuit of student courage and
honour. However, there was a far
greater prize at stake. Each bather
was entered into a competition draw
held by Taybarns, whereby the winner would be able to eat one day a
week for free at the restaurant over
the course of a year.
The grand prize was awarded
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the win, the 1st year Ancient History student commented that it was
“brilliant news”, particularly as he
conveniently lives close to the Taybarns restaurant in Swallwell.
For Tom, “Freshers Week is all
about new experiences and it is not
every day that you get to jump in a
bath of beans”.
For Tom at least, it is now a case of
bean there done that.
Part-tea on at the Union
> Student parents,
carers and family
members upbeat for
the new semester
Newcastle University Student Parent and Carers Forum played host
to over 40 parents, children, carers
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family tea party.
The event, which took place on
Saturday September 26 at the Student Union, kicks off a series of social events across the semester.
Families had the opportunity to
chat and there were lots of games
for everyone. The children had their
faces painted and enjoyed arts and
The tea party was a huge success
and the turnout overwhelming. Parents and carers were really pleased,
because the party provided the opportunity to learn that others share
in their challenges.
The tea party was organised as
part of Freshers’ week by the Student Parents and Carers forum, Student Union Society and Newcastle
The forum aims to provide support
to students who have parenting and
caring responsibilities to help them
cope with parenting, caring and student life.
The forum also organises family
social events, addressing issues in
open dialogue with the university
and relevant authorities on the concerns of student parents and carers.
It is open to any student parent
and carer of the university and their
spouses/partners. Children are also
welcome at the meetings, which
every month at 1pm in the Training
room at the Union Building.
Meeting details are:
Date and Time: 1pm, 1st Wednesday of every month
Venue: Training room, Student
Union Building, Newcastle University
For more information, contact Deborah Smith: [email protected]
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
> Friends, team-mates
and teachers pay
respects to Ross Moodie
As the sporting season gets underway this year, one club is still reeling from the loss of one of its most
promising and popular members.
Ross Moodie, 20, died on the morning of Friday 23rd of August after a
rock climbing excursion with friends
in Greece went tragically wrong.
After falling more than 80ft the talented sportsman was left with two
broken legs, a broken wrist and extensive head injuries.
Due to their remote location, local rescue workers could not reach
the group until the evening, leaving Moodie’s climbing companions
helpless as their friend died waiting
to be rescued.
The 3rd year Marketing and Management student had been climbing
in the Etoloakarnania mountain region in the north of Greece on a day
off from his summer job as a sailLQJLQVWUXFWRUZLWKWKHKROLGD\ÀUP
Sunsail. After a year in industry
with IBM in London, he was due to
return to Newcastle this September.
Moodie had always been at the
forefront of Newcastle’s sporting
excellence, both as a gifted rower
and as part of the Intra Mural rugby team The Titans. Tributes have
poured in from both clubs.
His former coach at the Boat Club
recently told the Journal “ Ross was
a very popular character within the
club who was always full of life. His
loss is a tragedy; everyone at the
boat club was shocked and upset by
Just weeks after Ross’s death his
former teammates represented their
club and University at the European
University rowing championships.
7KH\ÀQLVKHGQGDQGGLGVRZHDUing black armbands in memory of
Ross’s close friends Alex Richardson, Bea Suarez and Steph Ritson
told The Courier of how the news has
affected them: “the days of Jesmond
streaking and cider showers are
no more. Christmas is going to be
lacking its giant snowman. [Without Ross] our days may be a little
more peaceful but certainly a lot less
Ross’s family plan to commemorate his lifelong passion for rowing
by donating a four-man boat to his
beloved Newcastle University Boat
Club. The boat is to be used by the
1st team and will be named in his
honour “Moodie Blues.”
Happier times: Ross (left) with his mum and brothers Duncan and Jamie
Andrew Corrigan and Ed Ford pay their respects at the European Championships in Poland
Extreme makeover: the university edition
The Higher Education Funding
Council of England (HEFCE) has
released a report recommending an
overhaul of the present university
First, second and third class degrees would be replaced with a
detailed report card under the new
This follows an increase in the
number of top grades being awarded. Figures show that close to twothirds of all students now leave university with a 2:1 or higher.
The HEFCE has denied claims that
degrees are becoming easier but
warned that universities cannot afford to become complacent.
The Burgess Group – which measures and records student achievements – has slammed the present
The group – chaired by Professor
Robert Burgess, Vice-Chancellor of
the University of Leicester – has labelled the current system “no longer
ÀW IRU SXUSRVHµ LQVLVWLQJ WKDW VWXdents and employers deserve an improved system.
The report recommends that universities adopt a US-style report
card system entitled the Higher
Education Achievement Report
The report card would contain a
breakdown of students’ marks in individual modules and assessments
including details of extra-curricular
Sophie Archer, a second year law
student, told The Courier:
“The use of a report card would
potentially be splitting hairs over
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and put students who, for whatever
reason, have not taken part in other
activities at a disadvantage.”
(GXFDWLRQ 2IÀFHU (PPD %XGJH
told The Courier:
“The use of HEAR is a great way
to encourage further involvement
in university life, whilst giving academic credit to extra-curricular activities - something which has not
strictly been done before.”
Newcastle University will join 14
other universities across the UK in
trialling the use of HEAR.
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
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A poem for Ross Moodie written by his friends
Kate Tilney and Charlotte Skipp
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Ig Nobel prize for cow study
> Newcastle University
Newcastle University researchers
have been awarded an Ig Nobel
prize for a study showing that naming cows increases their milk yield.
The Ig Nobel prizes, not to be confused with the Nobel prizes, were
announced last week. The awards
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make people laugh, and then make
Some of the other prizewinning
studies included one determining
why pregnant women do not fall
over and the invention of a bra that
doubles as a gas mask.
This bizarre insight was the result
of an investigation into cow welfare,
carried out by the department for
Agriculture, Food and Rural Development. Speaking to The Times,
Dr Catherine Douglas, who led the
research, said “the whole study was
about how stress and fear can have a
biological effect on milk yields”.
For the study, which was pub-
lished earlier this year, researchers
interviewed 516 dairy farmers about
their opinions on relationships between humans and animals.
48% of the farmers agreed that
positive contact with humans resulted in a better milk yield, and further experiments showed surprising
results: the milk yield from cows
called by individual names was one
The Courier reported Dr Catherine Douglas’
study back in February
to two litres greater than that from
cows herded as a group.
Dairy farmer Dennis Gibb, who
owns Eachwick Red House Farm
outside Newcastle, agreed with the
“They aren’t just our livelihood,
they’re part of the family” said Dennis. “We love our cows here, and
every one of them has a name. Collectively we refer to them as ‘our
ladies’, but each one has her own
Dr Peter Robinson, Dr Douglas’s
co-investigator, added, “On a serious note, our research was all about
improving animal welfare”, pointLQJRXWWKDWWKHUHLVVLJQLÀFDQWHYL
dence of a link between the stress
hormone cortisol and the production of milk in cows.
However, only 10% of the farmers
interviewed believed a fear of humans affected milk production.
The Ig Nobel peace prize went to
a team who investigated whether it
is more dangerous to be smashed
over the head with a full bottle or an
The answer was a full bottle,
though either is going to cause serious head trauma.
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
Police hunt rapist
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Inside today >>>
Should the BNP
be on the BBC?
Comment, page 11
Culture, page 24
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
A Royal welcome
After a summer of speculation,
Princess Eugenie of York arrived
at Newcastle University to begin
her three year BA Hons Combined
Studies degree in English, History
of Art and Politics.
National media including the BBC,
ITV, The Sun, Daily Mail and The
Mirror gathered on campus the day
glimpse of the younger daughter of
Prince Andrew and Sarah, Duchess
of York, as she attended an inducWLRQRQDFFRPPRGDWLRQÀQDQFHDQG
,Q WKH RIÀFLDO SUHVV VKRRW WKH
Queen’s granddaughter walked
hand-in-hand with a fellow student
from the Bedson to the Armstrong
Building, stopping only for a reporter who asked why she had chosen
Newcastle, to which the 19-year-old
simply stated, “because it’s a great
Continued from front page
As Eugenie acclimatises to her
new surroundings, media have
been asked to respect the Princess’
privacy for the rest of her time at
university, as was the case with her
cousin, Prince William during his
time at St Andrews, and her sister
Beatrice, who is a current student at
Goldsmiths, University of London.
7KH 3ULQFHVV· DUULYDO ÀQDOO\ HQGV
months of rumours which began
back in July when the Daily Mail
ÀUVW EURNH WKH QHZV WKDW WKH VL[WK
in line to the throne was coming to
The University would not comment on the story at the time but
media attention on the University
and Union grew as reports over
her potential motives for coming to
the city and her likely Halls of ResiGHQFH FRQWLQXHG WR ÀOO WDEORLG FROumn inches.
Now, however, the Princess will
be looking forward to settling in to
student life amongst the rest of this
year’s new intake.
Nice to see you: excited staff peer out from the Armstrong building
Walk on by: Princess Eugenie arrives at the Armstrong Building with a friend
Hickling feels the strategy as
it stands is a largely regressive
document, and whilst titled ‘Living and Learning’ in Newcastle,
merely focuses upon shifting
not solving the issues related to
Paul Allison, who publishes
New Student magazine, said:
“Even though there has been an
increase in students no one is
sleeping rough so there is enough
accommodation. First year halls
were oversubscribed this year but
spaces were found, there aren’t
people in hotel rooms or camp
beds in sports centres. Jesmond
will be the last place students
“Students want to live where
there are amenities, transport
links, shops, where they can go
out. It is not going to alleviate the
Jesmond problems and it could
make them worse.”
John Henderson, director of
Acorn Properties, who operate in
Jesmond, said: “Many businesses
in Jesmond would not be here if it
was not for the students and most
other businesses would struggle.
“Students are highly sophisticatHGFRQVXPHUV7KHLUH[SHFWDWLRQV
of standards of accommodation is
much higher than it has ever been
along with the responsible agents
in Newcastle, are helping to raise
the standard of accommodation
throughout the area.”
He continued: “In our own
majority of the students we deal
with are easy to get on with, appreciative of the service they get
and discerning in their choice of
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
Photos of Freshers’ Week Page 22 and 23 >>>
Editor: David Coverdale - [email protected]
Freshers’ Week proves a huge success
Newcastle University Freshers’
Week 2009 promised a lot and
delivered even more. With 3,500
wristbands completely selling out
IRUWKHÀUVWWLPHLQLWVKLVWRU\VWXdents from all over the world got
the best introduction to Newcastle
they could possibly have hoped for.
Once cars were unloaded, bags
unpacked and smart cards reFHLYHGÀUVW\HDUVKHDGHGGRZQWR
the Union for the huge ‘Beach Party
Blowout’ to kick their week off in
garlands were the order of the night
as freshers revelled amongst the
20 tonnes of sand, beach balls and
Basement, as well as the outdoor
VLOHQWGLVFR²DQRWKHUÀUVWIRU1HZcastle Freshers’ Week.
The summery theme continued
outside the Union the following
day, as the late September sun
dodgeball tournament, live DJs and
bouncy castle on show.
It was a festival-like atmosphere
and this was the way it stayed for
the majority of the week.
There were a vast array of daytime activities for freshers to get
stuck into and help them settle
into their new surroundings, from
cocktail making, pole dancing and
skiing, to trips to the Quayside,
Durham and the Angel of the North
And the nights only got bigger,
with students getting their dancing shoes on to the Celidh before
dancing in a different fashion the
following night at Pandamonium to
the sound of chart-topping Chicane.
The week’s events were then
as Freshtival saw the Union turn
into a mini-Glastonbury. Viva City,
Bombay Bicycle Club and North
The Careers Service at Newcastle University
provides information and
DGYLFH RQ GHYHORSLQJ \RXU VNLOOV ¿QGLQJ D
part-time job, work experience, supporting
business start-up and (when the time comes)
exploring graduate opportunities.
Below is a selection of the part-time jobs
currently being advertised through the Careers Service.
For more details about these and other vacancies, including details of how to apply, visit
their website at www.ncl.ac.uk/careers.
Job Title: Telephone Interviewers
Business: Economic and Strategy Based
Closing date: None given
Salary: £8 per hour
Basic job description: TBR is looking for motivated people who would like to form part of
a small survey team engaged in business surveys. The nature of the work they do usually
relates to conducting telephone surveys with
businesses – they do not contact households
or carry out street / door-to-door research.
Questions are generally about respondents’
views and opinions, there is no selling involved and these calls do not lead to further
sales calls. All of the work is project based.
Person requirements: You should have
East favourites Maximo Park took
over the main stage, while the other
outdoor stages added to a night
freshers will never forget.
The week proved a huge success
for all concerned, not least the four
student organisers Alex Elwick,
Ned Walker, Sally Willan and
Becky Turner, who more than made
sure Newcastle University kept
its reputation as the best Freshers’
Week in the country.
Feeling fresh: Maximo Park ended Freshers’ Week in style at the Union
a can-do attitude, commitment to the job in
hand, common sense and a thoughtful and
intelligent approach to work. As your role will
involve direct contact with businesses, good
communication skills and a pleasant and con¿GHQWWHOHSKRQHPDQQHUDUHHVVHQWLDO3UHYLous experience in telephone based work is
facing role is important. They look for good
FRQ¿GHQFH DQG SHUVRQDOLW\ ,I \RX¶UH ORRNLQJ
to add some high-level experience to your CV
then this is a great opportunity.
Job Title: Web Server Administrator
Employer: Bolsover Networks
Business: Web Development
Closing date: 30/10/2009
Salary: £15-25 per hour (depending upon
Basic job description: Bolsover Networks is
an internet start-up that builds web applications for niche markets (e.g. e-commerce sites
for antiques dealers, holiday home rental sites
etc), with customers signing up on a monthto-month subscription basis. A part-time Linux
Web Server Administrator is required. There
is the potential that the post could become full
time. This post is initially for 8 hours per week,
Person requirements: Some experience is
required, but they want people keen to teach
Job Title: Student Brand Managers
Employer: Campus Group
Business: Student marketing and promotions
Closing date: 01/11/2009
Salary: £6 - £8 per hour
Basic job description: Campus Group are
looking for student brand managers to promote prestigious brands at universities across
the country during the academic year of
2009/10. They carry out marketing campaigns
for brands such as Jack Daniels, The Foreign
&RPPRQZHDOWK 2I¿FH 6RXWKHUQ &RPIRUW
The Times and 3 Mobile. As a campus brand
manager you will gain invaluable experience
of running a series of exciting marketing acWLYLWLHVVXFKDVVWXQWV35HYHQWVOHDÀHWGLVtribution, promotions, road shows, sampling,
graduate recruitment, as well as working towards the prestigious Chartered Institute of
Marketing Award. Average of about 8 hours
Person requirements: They are looking for
dynamic students who want to gain experiHQFH LQ WKH ¿HOG RI PDUNHWLQJ <RX PXVW EH
able to work well individually, be able to really
make an impact and be keen to earn some
your studies. No experience is necessary but
being outgoing and enthusiastic is essential.
You should also be hard working, innovative
and willing to learn quickly.
Job Title: Short Break Workers
Employer: KIDS Direct Short Breaks
Closing date: None given
Salary: £7.39 per hour
Basic job description: A KIDS Direct Short
break means that Disabled children and
young people can enjoy and experience
activities that they are interested in with the
sonal Assistant). This is a permanent position
to provide support to Disabled children and
young people in a variety of settings to promote independence, inclusion and positive
Person requirements: Experience of working with Disabled children would be an advantage but is not essential as full training is
Job Title: Seasonal Brand Replenishment
Business: Field Marketing
Closing date: 04/12/2009
Salary: £5.80 per hour plus bonus
Basic job description: On behalf of their client, Bacardi Brown-Forman Brands, LMG are
looking for outgoing individuals to visit local
stores in three major grocery groups - Asda,
Tesco and Sainsbury’s - between 14/12/09
and 24/12/09 to ensure the portfolio of brands
including premium global brands such as
Bacardi Superior Rum & Jack Daniel’s are
fully stocked on the shelves. The job entails:
replenishment of stock on the shelves; liaising
with grocery staff on stock ordering issues;
checking promotional display compliance;
gaining additional display space & recording
line. Members of the BB-FB sales & marketing teams will provide support and pre-activity
3HUVRQ UHTXLUHPHQWV $OO DSSOLFDQWV PXVW
have a full driving license and access to a motor vehicle between the drive dates and have
access to the internet on a daily basis.
Location: Various across the UK
Hi, welcome to the 2nd edition of
‘Education Station’ your weekly
update on educational news
from across the University and
Just in case you didn’t get to
%XGJH \RXU (GXFDWLRQ 2IÀFHU
run your Union.
I have been in post since July
and things have been non-stop there is so much to learn and understand in a very short period of
time but so far I am really enjoying it.
As well as attending meetings
and working on different projects
I was also involved in Freshers’
Week which was fantastic. I hope
all of the new students had a good
ZHHN DQG DUH ÀQDOO\ UHFRYHUHG
and ready for the year ahead.
As for continuing students, I
hope you have had lovely summers and had a chance to relax
at least a little bit before the hard
work starts again.
Anyway, whilst most of you
students have been of playing
or working (sorry to the PG students -you are always working)
the Union has still been a hive of
DFWLYLW\ IRU WKH RIÀFHUV DQG VWDII
I have spent the summer going
to several training sessions run by
the National Union of Students.
These have been really useful
and helped me a lot with what
KDV EHFRPH P\ ÀUVW SURMHFW WKLV
year - implementing the course
rep system which I discussed in
You may have already heard of
the course rep system and possibly been a course rep last year
but this year we are trying to
make the system uniform across
Yoshiko Stokoe, a full time
member of the Student Advice
Centre, has been helping me settle in and get to grips with my
work as well as working alongside me to implement the new
course rep system.
Yoshiko’s role is Representation
and Democracy Coordinator, so
as well as helping me she works
with Pete Mercer (Student SupSRUW 2IÀFHU RQ SURMHFWV VXFK DV
As part of the new course rep
system we have been lucky
enough to have a fantastic intern
working with us, Rebecca Cousin,
a student who has been working
on the new course rep handbook.
Make sure you look out for ways
to get involved in the course rep
system this term.
That’s all for this week, but
keep checking up for ways to get
involved and news on what has
been going on.
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Comment Editors: Caroline Argyropulo-Palmer and Nic Fidler - [email protected]
The wheels of justice?
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Look out for more politcally active students’
views in future editions of The Courier.
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Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
No students, no more city
Liberal democracy is intended
to be, as much as is desirable, an
embodiment of the free market.
Choice is a means to freedom. We
have free elections to facilitate political liberty and we have a largely
laissez faire economy to facilitate
economic liberty. Pro-capitalist
economics lesson over.
However, on that note, you might
reasonably ask, how can anyone
possibly suggest they hold the right
to “encourage” students into “alternative” forms of accommodation
(probably super high rises) than
in the suburbs they legitimately
desire? As I angrily mentioned to
most of Newcastle City Council at
last week’s meeting “we are not cattle to be herded where you please”.
In my eyes, the council’s potential
plan to encourage students out of
Jesmond and Heaton is morally,
VRFLDOO\DQGHFRQRPLFDOO\XQMXVWLÀable. It is a joke born out of parochialism and discrimination, and one
that, as students, I believe we have
a duty to bring to its knees.
This is but one chapter of the
seemingly inescapable issue of students versus locals (as if, somehow,
our locale isn’t Newcastle as well?).
Such an opposition between the
two, and a confrontational mentality, was exactly the tone of last
week’s meeting; a viciously antistudent tone.
Of course, students by and large
are far from perfect (show me a
faction that is perfect) and aren’t
above redress. However, that
redress is called the police and the
due process of law, not an accumulation of parochial Geordies
complaining about students.
I shan’t list all our social ills but a
few booming parties now and then
is a laughable grievance compared
to what many others in this country
and abroad have to contend with:
namely real problems. Students
don’t tend to steal or murder or
form groups with which to terrorise the streets; we are not society’s
enemy but, if anything, its future
of opportunity in the housing market afforded to the rest of society.
Contrast this with the near inexhaustible list of desirable factors
that students merit. First and most
obviously, we are an economic
mainstay of this city.
The volume of rent a student body
nearing 40,000 (between us and
Northumbria combined) generates
is almost incalculable, but certainly
well into the millions. My landlord
last year drove a Mercedes, and I
was taken to another viewing in a
Range Rover Vogue…
Similarly, who keeps the microeconomy that is Osborne Road
these bars and restaurants (and
pack out Tesco Metro every day for
that matter), creating both jobs and
prosperity in doing so.
These are only the present economic advantages; the prospective
will yield as graduates are irreplaceable. Given the dissilution of
shipbuilding and collapse of manufacturing, it is a fair question to
ask what it is that this city actually
does to earn its keep. The answer,
in no uncertain terms is research
and education (oh, and run a failing
a more real sense than the Univer-
sity’s new business school, which
is to be built on the old Scottish &
Newcastle brewery premises; a successful industry literally supplanting a failing one.
“We are not cattle to
be herded where
Indeed, our University is inextricably linked with the economic
development of the city. Who
provides the lawyers and accountants who will drive the city’s
business sector in the future? Who
puts doctors in training in every
major hospital in this city? Whose
Geomatics Department did the land
survey for the Angel of the North?
Whose biomedical research centre
Who directly employs around 5000
people and thousands more indirectly? Who turned over £342 million in the year to July 2007? Who
provides almost everything this city
could ever need for a high standard
of living in the future?
The answer of course, is right
in front of you, it is our beloved
Newcastle University. It seems to
me as if the City Council are all too
solid, research intensive university
yet are quick to dismiss the housing
needs and desires of the people of
which ultimately it consists.
Conversely, Newcastle is to
my knowledge one of the only,
if not the only, red-brick university located at the very centre of
a city. It is ridiculous to suggest
we shouldn’t be allowed to live in
suburbs with the closest proximity
to our institution (namely Jesmond
and Sandyford) when we have the
ridiculous being the active word
with regard to the suggestion from
the Jesmond Residents Association
that we should all live in Westerhope. Brilliant, we’ll all just drive in
I guess? Oh, wait a minute…thanks
to the punitive permit system, we
can’t do that either.
Other stupid assertions, devoid of
any reason or substance from the
JRA went along the lines of “this
is our city”, “we pay taxes” and
“we’re the electorate”, as if one
could claim ownership of city or as
if we can’t vote or pay taxes.
Given the above, I really resent
these anti-student proposals; yes,
students are imperfect but we as a
collective and as individuals have
plenty to offer this city as its future
backbone (and as taxpaying, electorally empowered, legally recognised adults with self-deterministic
ideas, I should hasten to add) that
even attempt to marginalise us as a
If the word student was replaced
with any other label, literally any
other word, as a target of this policy, there would be social uproar.
Discrimination by creed, colour or
gender is supposed to be abhorrent
in society, so why should discrimination by educational status be
If Newcastle City Council are so
stupidly introverted and idiotic as
to disincentivise coming to study
at a fantastic place like Newcastle
University, this city will die a very
noticeable death. Maybe then, the
Jesmond Residents Association
would be happy when there’s not a
single student in Jesmond, and not
a single job in Tyneside.
Converse: a symbol of what?
Converse Allstars: love ‘em or hate
‘em? If you’re a lover, chances are
it’s because of what they aren’t,
rather than what they are.
When you wear Converse there’s
no need for air-bubbles, or pumps,
or disc-fastening-systems. They
don’t make you jump higher or run
faster. They’re plain and simple.
They’re everything that someone
by trendy labels would choose to
wear on their feet. Rockstars aren’t
paid to endorse them, they wear
them because they rock. They’re
the anti-corporate shoe. They’re the
in 2001 they were bought out by
a wee bit, Nike stepped in and
saved the iconic shoe manufacturer
from going under. Was this some
altruistic deed to preserve Chuck
Taylor’s heritage? Hardly likely.
Originally an American shoe manufactured in America, Nike have
outsourced the majority of production to Asia to cut costs.
Imagine the board meeting: a
bunch of the sportswear behemoth’s execs sitting around a big
table, pondering how to tap into all
those ‘consumers’ that were just be\RQGWKHLUÀQJHUWLSV1LNHDOUHDG\
had their iconic Air Force 1 range,
but they’re a bit too hip-hop.
They needed something to bridge
the divide, to give them another
stylistic subdivision and let the
individual assert their individuality
that little bit more. While still wearing a pair of Nike sneaks.
All signs point to this being
the age of the individual, but it’s
We all try to look unique,
whether going for the sophisticated
of the designer label or the ‘I’m–abohemian-get-me-out-here’ charity
shop look; what we wear is usually
an attempt to say something about
There’s nothing wrong with this.
We all do it. It’s self-expression.
The problem emerges when cultural roots are dug up and vacuum
packed to preserve the shareholder’s dividend. Can the original
values remain intact? Are we still
It was almost inevitable that a
chunk of our personal identity
would wind up hanging in our
ÁDWSDFNHGZDUGUREH,QWKHÀIties, an advertiser called Sydney J.
Levy had a light-bulb moment and
invented the term ‘lifestyle’. He realised that everyone has their own
style of life – complete with ideals,
beliefs and personal identity.
Tap into their lifestyle, brand your
product accordingly and hey, presto! By targeting the right ‘lifestyle
consumer’ through the brand’s
imagery you could create a product
that people will see as representing
how they see themselves. Not only
that, they would ‘aspire’ to own
them. Levy was a clever guy.
Ever since then, clever people
persuading us that certain brands
mean certain things and consuming
them can endow (yes, endow) us
with those values. Brands became
social entities that people could
For years, Allstars were the rebel’s
choice of trainer, and not because
of clever marketing. That’s just
what rebels wore. Now read any
Converse ad and they’ve gone
full circle, explicitly promoting
the ‘freedom’ and ‘rebellion’ that
used to be implicit. Can they still
be the rebel’s shoe now they’re
owned by Nike? A company whose
rebellious nature is perhaps best
demonstrated in the way they rebel
against paying factory workers a
The image of Converse is still one
of freedom of expression and open
mindedness, but these images are
now portrayed rather than perceived. Who doesn’t want to be a
bit of a rebel? But in doing this, the
originality has been subverted to
sell us a product we identify with.
It might be the case that it’s the
foot inside that shapes the shoe, but
can this really be the case when the
manufacturer openly acknowledges
that all they care about is making
the most money they can from their
lines (it actually says this on their
The other day I saw a kid on the
Metro wearing a pair of Converse
with a printed on anarchy symbol.
This wasn’t a kid who had bought
some Allstars and gone home and
painted it on himself to piss off his
parents; he had actually bought
them with the logo already on. Preprinted anarchy for pre-pubescent
Maybe while impoverished children sew together canvas trainers
with an anarchy symbol adorning
them, we in the West will tie up the
laces to tear down the establishment. Or maybe the ‘anarchist’ is
just one more ‘lifestyle’ that is now
branded, boxed and shipped out.
The other day as I hovered
around Haymarket station trying to remember whether it was
KFC or McDonalds that I had
dreamt of the night before, a
gentle looking old boy of about
80 was slowly getting cash out of
the machine in front of me, and
I thought little of seeing him key
Stepping up to the machine I
was wondering why my card
refused to go in and noticed that,
in a hurry to do whatever it was
he was doing, he had taken out
the card but left all ten crisp £20
notes sitting there. By the time
I took out the wad to stop the
beeping he was already around
Panic station! What do you
across your mind in a second.
Take the money and run!
Nobody watching, or is there?
Clearly, a massive man with
muscles is going to pop out of
nowhere and break my nose,
pointing out my crime to a gathering crowd.
The old man will come back
and shake his hand. He will
probably give his saviour a
reward. Cameras! Police will
come knocking on my door later
in the day and tell me I’m nicked
following the indefatigable
evidence from the 37 CCTV cameras on Northumberland Street
recording every masterful duck
and weave of my escape route.
“Take the money
Robbing a nice old man of
his pension is despicable, they
would say, before planting
drugs on me and sending me to
prison for 10 years, probably to
get raped in the showers.
But think of the money… a
student could be made very
happy with that much. Some
new clothes, trainers, music,
DVDs, a huge TV, all are easily
in reach now. Put off the inevitable descent into the second
overdraft just after your student
loan(s) come in. Live a little, live
a lotto – get really pissed and go
to the casino and lose it all on
one game of roulette.
Amazing. Fuck KFC and McDonalds, I can afford to dine at
Burger King today.
But then again he was such a
kindly old gent, what kind of
horrible degenerate am I by taking away his hard earned cash?
This is the kind of man I want
to be when I grow older, taking
out £200 to buy my grandson a
Playstation 12, chuckling away
whilst I suck on a Werther’s
Maybe if I knew he was a
convicted Nazi paedophile the
decision would be a touch easier.
What would be very easy money
would not, however, outweigh
the overwhelming shame and
guilt that would inevitably follow as I bathed in the success of
The more pious amongst you
will be pleased to know that I instantly put those ideas out of my
head and ran after him. Needless to say he was thankful and
laughed at his own clumsiness. I
felt great about it.
Cash back. I went to McDonalds and had the tastiest Big Mac
I’ve ever had.
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
A ticket too far
There is something undeniably bitter about being required to pay for
pubic transport. Going to work
is bad enough, but to have to exchange the money you’ve yet to
earn for the privilege of sharing the
same breathing space with potential
Will Young fans, to get to a place nowhere near where you want to be,
at a time long after you’re meant to
be there, almost makes you wonder
who should be paying who.
It was perhaps this which sparked
27 year old IT expert Jonathan
Moore’s two year stint of producing
fake train tickets in order to travel to
work from Brighton to London, saving himself a whooping £12,472.
His reign of free travel by fabricating the forged tickets on his laptop began in 2006, and came to an
abrupt halt in November last year
when a ticket inspector noticed discrepancies with the colouring of the
WLFNHW 0RRUH ÁDVKHG GXULQJ D URXtine check.
Eleven more forged tickets were
found in a plastic wallet and police discovered designs for 70 more
fake tickets. Last week he received
a nine-month suspended sentence
and a 240-hour work order. He was
also ordered to pay the full £12,472
price of the tickets that he faked, as
well as £510 in costs.
In an interview with BBC News,
Detective Constable Rob Constable
assured viewers that ‘the British
transport police, with their partners
the railway company take this very
seriously, and we are committed to
bringing these people to justice.’
The victims that ‘suffer’ due to
Moore’s criminal offence are the
travelling public. Us. The hardworking, law abiding citizens who
pay their way because they haven’t
got the same IT expertise to follow
in Moore’s footsteps, or train tracks.
And would happily buy him a pint.
Comments after the article on The
Times website include ‘Who can
blame him?’ and ‘No wonder’. Despite constant promises by the government to improve the country’s
public transport service, September
found a reported unsubstantiated
rise on current ticket prices, making
it no surprise that one reader will
‘stick to his car, thanks.’
Although the government has once
again failed in the public transport
sector, the standard of its educational services has given us enough to
realise that £12,472 over the course
of two years makes £6,236 per annum. Which is, as Judge Richard
Hayward commented, a ‘considerable amount’.
“The victims that
‘suffer’ due to
offence are the
Furthermore, the statement by
Hayward that it is ‘very sad’ that
Moore used his skills for a fraudulent purpose is up for discussion.
Very sad for whom? Sad that Moore,
in his well respected job, as a well
respected British citizen of no previous convictions lowered himself
to criminal status? Or sad that the
British government is making a diUHFWPRFNHU\RIWKHLUVXSSRVHGÀJKW
against global warming by trying to
get as many as possible acquainted
with the joys of public transport by
charging us through the nose.
0RRUH·V RQO\ MXVWLÀFDWLRQ IRU KLV
actions was that he was undergoLQJ GLIÀFXOWLHV DW KRPH DQG ZRUN
Which I translate as ‘the British rail
industries are pirates.’
Karen Boswell, the customer services director at First Capital Connect,
praised the ticket inspector who
spotted the scam, and labelled it ‘a
tribute to our quick witted staff that
this thief was caught out’ as ‘fare
dodgers are robbing the rail industry of £400 million a year — money
that could otherwise be invested in
better services for the vast majority
of law-abiding passengers who pay
for their ticket.’
If this is truly the case, there must
be a hell of a lot of Moore protégées
riding wild and free on British Rail.
And I am here to offer a solution.
Install said ‘quick witted’ inspector
who brought Moore to his demise as
leader of a twelve week course detailing the exact shape, feel, size and
smell of the tickets they’ve supposHGO\ EHHQ TXDOLÀHG WR LQVSHFW GXUing their previous years in the same
Provide reports detailing to the
penny totals of how much is being
repaid to British rail companies, together with paparazzi-esque shots
of said criminals shying away from
cameras, whilst readers compare
these would-have-been yearly transport costs to their mortgage repayments. Then I’d like to know: will it
bring down the price of a Mars bar
from the trolley?
Robbing the public blind, deaf and
to the pleasure of getting from A to
B. At £2 for a bottle of coke and 80p a
pop for a KitKat Chunky you begin
to wonder why you even bothered
to get out of bed at all. Not to mention 20p for a pee. Hell, at least
Obviously, I’m not condoning
the boycotting of paying for public
transport. Although it is the robbery
of a faceless, cold hearted, cash devouring system that once again lines
its own pockets by emptying ours, it
is still ultimately wrong.
No, I opt for Plan B: use a car instead. City centre car parks demand
more per hour than the price of a
Starbucks, but tally up the price of
a few train tickets, add a couple of
quid for some extortionately priced
cod and drink, and the costs getting
to and from stations.
Then a few months down the line
add the cost of petrol, congestion
charges, road tax and insurance and
we’ll see if you’re not still making a
killing against the trains . Even if not,
listening to the Pocahontas soundtrack on the way there and getting
a McDonalds drive through on the
way back, pushes public transport
off the radar.
Meanwhile we’re all well aware
bankrupt Jonathan Moore is thinking; should’ve changed the ink in
Should the BNP be on the BBC?
The harrowing June day that the BNP
won two MEP seats, including one
IRU /HDGHU 1LFN *ULIÀQ VLJQLÀFDQWO\
changed the position of the explicitly
With utmost regret, we must accept
that it now has democratically elected
members of the European Parliament.
Despite them holding beliefs contrary to
the founding ones which allowed them
to be elected, the BBC must present, not
JLYHSODWIRUPWRWKHPLQLWVÁDJVKLSGHbate programme Question Time.
The most disturbing and crucial deWDLO RI WKH *ULIÀQ·V 1RUWK :HVW YLFWRU\
in June is that his support did not even
rise; it fell. In the 2004 European Elections, he polled over 2,000 more votes
enough to see him elected.
Thankfully Labour has recognised
its part in both that election and the future campaign to take back those seats,
changing its original stance of not engaging the party, a policy Jon Cruddas MP
and anti-BNP campaigner admits now
‘offers diminishing returns’ due to the
HOHFWLRQ RI *ULIÀQ DQG KLV IHOORZ QHZ
MEP Andrew Brons.
This change of tact has been represented by Justice Minister and North Western MP Jack Straw’s sitting on the panel
amongst members of the other leading
make the argument for people’.
‘Shame on the BBC’ will be the message of Unite Against Fascism protestors
RXWVLGH 7HOHYLVLRQ &HQWUH GXULQJ ÀOPing on 22nd October. To say this and that
the BBC has ‘rolled out the red carpet’ to
the Oxford Union did in November 2007,
when hundreds of protestors stormed
the debate to voice their disapproval, is
irrespective of the need to preserve the
BBC’s integrity as a public service broadcaster: to present without bias the views
of the country.
But the appearance is not just democratically required. It is needed for the
other panelists and audience to prove
that under bright studio lights of intelligent discussion and engagement, the
KDWHIXO IHDULQGXFLQJ PHVV *ULIÀQ DQG
his party call policy, which has so far
grown in the darkness of obscurity, becomes painfully clear.
“Our audiences - and
the electorate - will
make up their own
minds about the
offered by elected
BBC Chief Political
Adviser Ric Bailey
The edition of Question
Time will be broadcast
on October 22nd, and a
protest against their appearance is being held in
Newcastle on the same
day, meeting outside the
Union at 5pm.
Extremist parties prey on mass hysteria.
They attack peoples’ worst fears, imposing concepts that are both damaging and
GDQJHURXV7KHVHYLHZVGRQRWÀQGVXSport amongst the electorate when things
are going well in a country; yet as soon
as things take a turn for the worse they
look to gorge upon the insecurities of a
This has been a torrid year for the
mainstream political parties; the recession coupled with the rather untimely
H[SHQVHVÀDVFRKDVFULSSOHG%ULWLVKSROLtics. Now is not the time to give the BNP
any chance to legitimise their abhorrent
horrendous ideas of this nationalist
party – such as sinking the ships that carry hopeful but helpless humans to their
chance for a better life. Our current immigration policy may have its weaknesses
but surely they are superior to what can
only be described as mass murder.
The BNP claims they have a right to
free speech, yet their policies would undermine the human rights of millions
within this country, many of whom are
British citizens – this contradiction is un-
he so desires at BNP events but the BBC
should not be offering him an opportunity to speak to the nation and attempt
to make his views appear as common
VHQVH 7KHVH YLHZV DUH DW EHVW LQÁDPmatory and at worst socially destructive
“Now is not the
time to give the BNP
any chance to
The BBC may have to act without bias
but they must also be socially responsiEOH,KDYHQRGRXEW*ULIÀQZLOOEHSODQning to convince us that he is a moderate
minutes reading through his past comments will show you that this is a complete lie.
As the BBC appear keen to go ahead
with the debate, I can only hope that the
other panellists will be aware enough to
counter-attack this political predator and
leave irreparable scars on the face of his
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
Life & Style Editors: Larisa Brown, Alex Felton and Ashley Fryer - [email protected]
Health & Beauty
Just how safe are our vaccines?
1) When you know it’s going to be
a heavy night, take evening primrose supplements before you go
out and the morning after to sort
out that all too familiar sallow
2) Soak orange peel in water and
then splash your face with it to
tighten pores and brighten skin.
3) Got a spot right before a big
night out? Try mashing aspirin
and parsley into a paste with water
and pasting lightly onto the spot.
Alone or under make-up the two
ingredients work to lessen redness
and alleviate infection.
Cervical cancer is the second highest cause of death for female cancer
patients in the world and the NHS
has estimated that the HPV jab, the
LPPXQLVDWLRQXVHGWRÀJKWWKHGLVease, could potentially save about
700 lives a year.
In Great Britain alone there are
2,800 reported cases of the disease
annually, 1,000 of these being fatal. HPV (Human Papilloma Virus)
causes abnormal tissue and cell mutation in the body, especially in areas of softer membrane such as the
A jab to protect from the HPV viruses was introduced by the government in 2008 for girls between the
ages of 12-13. The government have
also implemented a run of catchup immunisations for girls still at
school that would otherwise miss
out on the jab.
In the wake of the tragic and unexpected death of 14 year old school
girl, Natalie Morton, merely hours
after receiving the jab, parents of
teenage girls nationwide are reassessing the idea of having their
In the case of Morton, it has been
revealed that the injection, in fact,
had nothing to do with her untimely death and that an undetected tumour in her chest was the cause of
the schoolgirl’s fatality.
This fact, however, has not prevented queries about the jab being
bought to the forefront of national
news and also caused the batch of
immunisations in question to be
quarantined and removed; this was
some 200,000 doses of Cervarix.
Of course, the vaccination of children has never been controversy
free; one only has to look at the furore surrounding the MRR jab to note
that this is a bound to be a highly
Knowing that there is potential
risk with the immunisation itself,
the choice that parents face is not a
simple one and over the past decade
it has been a major task for the NHS
Britain that immunisation is, in fact,
the safest and best option for their
The government’s choice of vaccination in itself, before the programme of immunisation even began, was surrounded by controversy.
How to...tone thighs
The thighs. The most-hated body
part amongst woman-kind? Whether they be too long (don’t even ask
me why some people complain
too dimply, too this or too that, us
ladies are never happy with our
Just open any beauty magazine or
online blog and you are inundated
with hundreds upon thousands of
tips, secrets and recommendations
of ridiculously overpriced products,
all promising the same thing: thin,
lean and cellulite-free legs.
I for one have tried and tested everything from the coffee bean trick
(yes, I was stupid enough to believe
Cosmopolitan when they told me
that rubbing coffee beans on your
legs would in fact release caffeine
which in turn speeds up the blood
ÁRZSUHYHQWLQJFHOOXOLWHWRWKHODWest “high-tech” serum advertised
in the glossy mags, all to little avail
and much disappointment.
A multi million dollar industry of
creams, serums, gels and even surgery has been created on the basis
of us females (and even some men)
Great Britain has chosen to use Cervarix, the vaccination distributed by
GlaxoSmithKline, as opposed to the
rival brand of Gardasil.
Gardasil also protects from other
strands of HPV, as opposed to Cervarix which only serves effectively
against the two strands which directly cause cervical cancer. Gardasil,
for example, should protect against
genital warts as well.
Other countries have chosen to
use Gardasil and critics claim that
Cervarix has taken preference over
Gardasil in our country because of
cost issues, the former being the
The government will not comment on this issue and claim that
after various tests they decided that
Cervarix was better for our nation’s
young girls. They have refused to
release the full details or results of
With the current HPV vaccination,
one of the most hotly debated issues is the government’s refusal to
decrease the age of young women
having access to the cervical smear
Around 40% of all HPV diagnoses
are related to sexually transmitted
diseases; since there is such a high
association between HPV and STIs
there has been a call to lower the age
of smear tests.
Some would argue that if young
girls are old enough to be protected
from diseases often linked with sexual promiscuity, then they should
be old enough to get tested for the
Conversely, those calling for the
complete removal of the vaccination
argue that the immunisation itself
is promoting sexual promiscuity
amongst young girls.
Theirs, however, should be an issue to take up with the sexual education system as opposed to the
vaccination of young girls against a
potentially deadly disease.
Despite the fact that there have
been more than 4,500 complaints of
bad reactions to the jab since its iniWLDWLRQWKHÀUVWPRQWKVRILPSOHmentation seem to have been wholly
successful for the HPV vaccination.
Ultimately the vaccination of children must be something that parents
begin to take as standard. As these
new medicines become available it
seems an obvious choice to have the
youth of our nation protected from
potentially fatal diseases.
being so horribly insecure about our
The sad thing, ladies, is that we are
never actually told by these beauty
companies or magazines that the
dimpling effect of cellulite under the
skin is in fact caused by the swelling of subdermal fat cells pushing
around the connective tissues that
hold the cells together.
And there is only one way we can
get rid of that; a revolutionary and
extraordinary concept known as exercise.
We get swept away in the sea of
these beauty products, non-invasive
treatments, vibrating plates and indeed coffee beans, but we fail to remember the basics.
If we want toned legs, we must
use them more! Exercises such as
lunges, squats, stepping and inner
and outer thigh presses are all easy
as well as free.
We are misled into thinking that
Jennifer Aniston’s legs are the norm
and that this is how we all must
look in order to be socially accepted.
Wrong. How is a gap between the
thighs when we put them together
sexy or natural?!
Unlike Jen we do not have 24 hour
access to personal trainers, dieticians, yoga instructors and spas.
We are students for God’s sake!
But we do have the ability to use
our legs. So before we all splash
or “dimple-busting formula” we
should maybe all grab a pair of
trainers, go for a run every now and
then and embrace the wonder that is
the thigh. It might not be so bad.
4) If you’re out of shampoo, fairy
liquid makes a surprisingly good
alternative and you can make a
great conditioning treatment by
mashing together mayonnaise and
5) To avoid shiny forehead syndrome, an insider tip for clubbing
is to put a little roll on deodorant
along your hairline. While it’s not
great for your skin on a regular basis, it does work a treat if you want
to be oil free for a big night out
6) If you’re blonde you may be
aware of the perils of both chlorine
and brassiness. If you have had a
swimming disaster and ended up
with green hair, or have found
yourself veering a little too near
to ginger for your liking, tomato
ketchup is an unlikely but excellent cure. Squeeze some on your
hair and leave for 20 minutes for
7) There is nothing more depressing than having a skin breakout
prior to a special occasion. Expert
make-up artists and dermatologists swear by milk of magnesium.
Originally used to cure stomach
ailments, it is available at Boots in
liquid form and when dabbed onto
skin with a cotton pad before bed
or before make up it reduces oil
production and soothes breakouts,
making skin look more even.
8) If you don’t fancy splashing out
on expensive skin treatments but
together baking soda and cucumber for an exfoliating treat.
9) After washing your hair, simply
rinse with cold water after conditioning then give hair a blast with
the cool setting on your hairdryer
for extra glossiness.
10) Vaseline truly is the best multipurpose product. Use it to make
your eyelashes thick and glossy by
rubbing it on at night, as it encourages hair growth. Use on lips for
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Finally! Balmain-inspired garments
DUH KLWWLQJ WKH VKRS ÁRRUV RI RXU
favourite high street stores. Earlier
in the year we saw the 80’s-inspired
trends rock the catwalks of Paris
with embellishment, studs and
Now we are lucky to see every
store from French Connection to
Primark try their hand at an affordable homage to the label on everybody’s lips.
Christopher Kane at Topshop
Yes girls you heard right! The Scottish design legend-in-the-making
now has his own capsule collection
of neon dresses, bejewelled t-shirts
and graphic print tunics on sale at
6WXGHQW GLVFRXQW ÀQDOO\ PDNHV
a designer item so much more appealing! My favourite is the leather
box clutch bag but grab it whilst
Uni’s Best Dressed
Name: Sophie Farrar
Name: Dom Cuthbertson
Course: Fine Art, 2nd
Course: Structural Engineering, Postgrad
don’t really follow
fashion, I just wear
what looks good and
like to think I have my
Fashion Predictions Winter 2009: ‘Wear a hat, its
going to be cold!’
Winter 2009: ‘Fur and
leather jackets are a
must for this season.’
Blue windbreaker jacket:
Jeans: £70, Garbstore
Hat: £5, H&M
Blue Boat shoes: £50,
White T-shirt: £12,
Blazer: £15, New Look
On the eve of LFW’s 25 year anniversary, the return of the British
fashion house to the London catwalks, showcasing the cream of
British design, is enough to make
any fashionista drool - let alone
Alexa Chung, Pixie Geldof and the
new face of Burberry herself, Emma
Watson, who were all there on the
Jeans: £30, Topshop
So there you have it,
two of Newcastle’s most
fashion forward students!
Next week we will have
two more fashionistas for
you, so remember to dress
up for those lectures and
you might be The Courier’s
next stylish student!
White leather plimsoles: £20, Topshop
ters Mens Department
Student Loan Binges
Why do you feel these sudden
pangs of guilt after buying a pair
were convinced you were going to
wear on Pandamonium but didn’t?
Or equally, is it actually possible
to shop too much as you tot up a total of more than a month’s wages in
one trip to the Metro Centre?
Topshop Student Shop+
Maybe I need to cut them some
slack for the amazing 20% off but
you can’t help wonder if that was
a small reward for an hour’s wait
LQ WKH QRUWKHUQ UDLQ WR ÀQG WKH
shop packed to the rafters. It was
handbags at dawn for the last pair
have an hour-long wait when you
get to the till!
A nation divided! They are very
comfortable, versatile, cheap and
easy to put on with a hangover but
they shouldn’t be worn as a substitute for jeans as most have no back
pockets, which are a necessity!
Furthermore, they are worn by
everyone on campus in a very
similar way but they haven’t quite
reached wardrobe-staple status.
LIFE & STYLE
Life & Style Editor
The fashion world is dominated by
a particularly scary breed of woman
– the model. Beautiful and often intimidatingly tall, models are every
normal woman’s worst nightmare.
We have even coined the term
‘modeliser’ – describing a womaniser who specialises in models. Like
I said, models are a scary bunch.
And to most women, the most outstanding feature of the model is her
designers the world over, the model
KDV WKH ÀJXUH WR ZHDU DOPRVW DQ\
After all, designers design their
clothes to be the infamous American size 0, so who could look better in them than the actual models
Whether you think size 0 is the ul-
timate turn on or the ultimate turn
off, both the catwalk and the celebrity worlds have spawned a nation
of teenagers desperate to be skinny,
with around 70% of American teenagers considering plastic surgery
before they are even 20.
7KH PHGLD KDYHQ·W TXLWH ÀJXUHG
out their take on the size 0 debate
– it seems magazines will damn a
woman either way, and only occasionally will they genuinely celebrate a woman’s body.
It seems almost sad that people
still make such a fuss about weight,
with the biggest news from London
Fashion Week being about Daniel
Fast’s use of plus size models.
Daniel Fast made headlines this
year when his stylist walked out of
his show due to his use of size 12
and 14 models in his knitwear collections.
I should point out here that plus
size in fashion terms is actually anything from a UK 10 to 14, which just
goes to show how skewed the fash-
ion world is.
Considering the commonest size in
the UK is a 16, women everywhere
feel damned by the fashion world.
But for how long? A recent issue
of Glamour in America spurred a
new wave of celebration due to the
printing of plus size model Lizzie
Miller’s tiny belly roll.
It may seem like a simple, inocuous photo, but it stands out amongst
of the pages and has caused ripples
around the publishing world.
With Glamour promising more
and more normal sized women in
its pages, could this be a sign that
things are changing? I would love
to see some normal looking women
in my magazines, as well as on the
Let’s hope this is a sign that changes are ahead, and that someday, all
healthy shapes and sizes will be celebrated the world over.
Sitting in the pub with friends, as I
do most Monday evenings, the conversation typically slipped from one
subject to another almost imperceptibly. As the night wore on however,
we eventually landed onto the subject of comic books. Being a group of
out and proud geeks, this is, without
a doubt, the holy grail of conversational topics, and before long I found
myself in the midst of a heated debate: which of the X Men reigns superior above all others?
Tricky stuff, this is one. It’s one of
those questions in which specialist
knowledge is essential. If I was going to participate then I needed do
it with sincerity and passion, and on
no account could I allow even the
slightest hint of self doubt to sneak
its way into my argument in order
sabotage it from the inside.
There are too many things to consider in a very short space of time:
who is my favourite mutant and
why? Are their powers defensive or
offensive? Do they have a compelling history? Is their code name good
enough? These things considered
I put my candidate forward – the
ever fascinating Nightcrawler. Why,
I hear you ask? Simple: he teleports,
he can swash some serious buckle,
and he’s blue. That’s right; I like him
because he’s blue. I like him because
he looks ever-so-slightly demonic.
In fact I don’t just like him; I think I
may be a little bit in love with him.
And then it hit me. The epiphany:
the moment in which I suddenly realised the full extent of my geekery.
Did my strange, borderline obsessive appreciation of all things great
and blue mean that I had a fetish of
some sort? Suddenly I was plagued
with visions of me hustling my poor,
helpless boyfriend into a corner and
lunging at him with a tub of navy
body paint. Did this mean I would
soon be scouring the alternative districts for an attachable tail, pointy
ears and goodness knows what
Probably not, but it was a discerning moment in my career as Marvel Fan. My fascination with Mister
Nightcrawler is one that is equal to
the obsessions of my fellow geeks
and comic lovers. After all, I have
a sneaking suspicion that the aforementioned boyfriend would do terrible, terrible things to have a pair
of wings like his favourite X man,
And this that’s the thing about us
geeks; we simply don’t do things by
halves. We’re in it for the long haul.
It doesn’t matter what your specialist
subject is, be it music, comics, Sci Fi,
whatever, it is a guarantee that you
will be welcomed with open arms.
It’s always nice to know you’re not
alone, isn’t it?
So I guess I’m not in it for a bit of
blue demon lovin’ after all. It’s just
a symptom of Chronic Fandom,
the kind of condition that goes undiagnosed in many year after year.
Not that it matters; the treatment is
alarmingly painless and pleasingly
cost effective. All you have to do is
get together with your own personal
support group of fellow fans and
talk/debate/argue to your heart’s
content. I hope that there will be
more debates to come; we’ve yet to
have the great ‘Lord of the Rings vs.
Star Wars’ conversation, after all.
And if all else fails, there’s still that
tub of blue body paint.
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
LIFE & STYLE
Sex & Relationships
Sex & Relationships
Out with the old, in with the new?
& Alice Miller
‘97% of all relationships fail in the
what is the door of the Union toilets
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THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Sex & Relationships
Ask Senõra Rosa
Senõra Rosa answers
your questions on
advice to beauty tips.
If you have questions
that need to be
answered or any
problems then email her at
I have been fairly promiscuous
over the last three years and have
slept with 52 people whilst at university. As I’m now in my third
year, I’m hoping to settle down a
ELW DQG SRVVLEO\ HYHQ ÀQG D JLUOfriend. However, I’m worried that
if I tell the girl that I have had so
many sexual encounters, she will
be put off a relationship. Is it better to tell the truth or to lie?
Fairly promiscuous?!!! Yes, I should
say. Now, think about this carefully
– whilst the female population are of
course…thrilled…that you’re thinking of putting the monkey back in
its cage, what no one needs is a rampant rabbit on the prowl for what
he mistakenly construes as ‘love,’
when really he’s just going to stomp
What you really need is a girl
who’s just as passionate about
meaningless sex as you seem to be,
so, by all means calm it down a bit,
but rather than actively looking for
a girlfriend, let her come to you.
Now please don’t try and pretend that you remember the name
and appearance of every single girl
you’ve been with at university.
Imagine the shame of having lied
to your lady about your sexual past,
then being presented to her group
of friends and having to do a mental
checklist…yup…blonde – Freshers
Week ’07…brunette - on my kitchen
table…ginger - whilst her parents
were sleeping in the same room…’
NO! You’ll be waving goodbye to
your ticket to girlfriendom quicker
than you probably climax.
Moral of the story – TELL THE
TRUTH. Yes, it may make things a
little trickier, but that’s your fault
for hanging out with your wang out
for all these years.
got back to Newcastle after my year
in practice. As all our friends have
graduated and moved into careers,
we are forced to make some new
ones. We have met this really cool
group of guys but unfortunately
I really fancy one of them. It isn’t
awkward at all but I don’t know if
I want to take it to the next level as
it might ruin our budding friendship. Should I take the plunge and
tell him how I feel or keep quiet
and try to remain friends?
Interesting…why don’t you try this
of security by keeping the friendship cooking, whilst secretly tryLQJ WR ÀQG RXW DV PXFK DERXW KLP
as possible. Oh – whaddya know –
you’ve showed up at his favourite
Saturday night haunt? Oh…what
a coincidence, you both have the
VDPH IDYRXULWH ÀOP \HV ¶,QVSHFW
her Gadget’ hasn’t always been
your number one choice, but hey,
people can change…) Indeed, the
word ‘stalker’ may cross your mind,
but just make sure that your night
In Freshers’ Week I might have had
a little too much to drink and after
a night out I came back to halls and
walked into the wrong bedroom
as one of the girls on my corridor
keeps their room on the latch all the
time. She was with her boyfriend
and so wasn’t there. In the middle
of the night I woke up and christened her sink with the contents
of my stomach. It is completely
blocked but I didn’t say anything
as I was so embarrassed. Should I
My girlfriend wears far too much
makeup even though she is naturally stunning. Do girls think that
JX\V OLNH LW RU LV LW MXVW WKDW VKH·V
insecure? Is there a way that I can
If she’s naturally stunning then
I’m sure she’s not insecure, she’s
just making herself feel good, and
what’s wrong with that? Don’t give
yourself that much credit…she’s not
doing it for you and all the other
men out there, she’s an independent lady and she’ll be doing it for
herself! If you spend too much time
focusing on what you perceive to be
KHU ¶ÁDZV· WKHQ \RX·OO QHJOHFW JLYing her the attention she deserves.
If you still feel the need to broach
the subject with her, wait for that
perfect post-sex moment, when
tell her that this is when she looks
at her best. At the end of a steamy
VHVVLRQVKH·OOKRSHIXOO\EHVRHODWed that she’ll lap it up. However, if
this ends up simply being a massive mood killer, at least you’ve
tried and you could always head on
down to the physics labs where I’m
up-wearing-hotties…far more your
Sex and the
vision goggles don’t fall out of your
bag at the crucial moment…
He’ll soon realise how much you
‘have in common,’ and start seeing
you in a whole new light, without
you having to bare your soul.
NB: Be careful, being too ‘matey’ is
DOZD\V D LVVXH ² \RX·YH JRW WR ÀQG
WKH ULJKW EDODQFH DYRLG IDUW MRNHV
and belching loudly in public, and
1R WKDW·V ÀQH SHUVRQDOO\ , WKLQN
it was mighty considerate of you to
actually relieve yourself in her sink
rather than anywhere else! I once
awoke to a friend of mine taking a
slash right onto my desk – he had
been convinced that I actually had
an en suite and kept yelling at me
to get out of his cubicle and stop
watching him! Upon closer examination the next morning I found my
desk a puddle, my boots soaked and
P\ WRDVWHU RYHUÁRZLQJ 6R GRQ·W
fret over a bit of chunder, the halls
of Newcastle have seen a lot worse.
Maybe leave her an anonymous bottle of bleach and leave it at that?
LIFE & STYLE
Uni’s Got Talent!
3rd year Sociology
Email [email protected] to nominate your friend
of the Week:
An amazing position that will
drive both partners to dizzy new
Dirty Directions - The lady
needs to lie on her back on either
a counter, desk, table or whatever else you fancy, ensuring
that her pelvis is slightly lower
than the man’s hips when he's
The man needs to stand between the lady’s legs, then lift
her bottom up with his hands to
the level of his hips and penetrate.
Try changing the lady’s leg
positions, either over the man’s
shoulders or round his waist.
OK, so I’m no Carrie, I have
never been to New York, never
dated a millionaire and I have
never even seen a pair of Jimmy
But I’m not complaining, after
not a very plausible one at that.
Writing only one measly colXPQ HYHU\ ZHHN IRU ZKDW ,·P
told is actually the English equivalent to The Metro) and somehow managing to live in a lavish
apartment stuffed to the brim
with designer clothes, is alright
What I do intend to do however, is re-produce my own version
of her imaginary column by taking her titles and topics and seeing how relationships up in the
North East of England correlate.
Are all relationships essentially the same? After skipping
through various Season 1 absolute rubbish I eventually arrived
at my question, ‘What should
you be able to say in a relationship?’
This seems to me to be a fairly
to say what you want.
The best part of having a boy/
girl friend is the closeness, the
way they become your best
friend and ultimate ally.
If you feel like you can’t say
what you want around your
partner then surely you are not
being yourself, how long can a
facade really last?
Obviously there are the obligatory lies - they get a new hideous
haircut, you say that you love it.
<RX PHHW DOO WKH IDPLO\ LQFOXGing the predictably pervy uncle)
and you say they’re all great.
That’s just how it works, and
it’s no different for friends. I used
to detest one of my friends boyfriend, did I tell her...no!
I nodded along as she referred
to him as the best thing since
sliced bread and simply ‘forgot’ to mention how I actually
thought he was a complete and
When it comes to situations
like these, you learn to shut your
PRXWK LW·V XQOLNHO\ VKH·V JRLQJ
to split up with him because of
She is however, likely to never
VSHDN WR \RX DJDLQ XQWLO WKH\
break up of course). It’s universally acknowledged - sometimes
the truth is better left un-said.
7KHUHLVGHÀQLWHO\DGLVWLQFWGLIference however, between these
‘obligatory lies’ and being unable to say what you want to your
Understandably at the start of
a relationship, you may be a little careful about admitting you
think their mum is a complete
After the six month point, if
you’re not slagging off their favourite band and telling them
how you accidentally farted in a
seminar that day, then it’s time to
Inside today >>>
Photos from Freshers’
Culture, page 22-23
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
LIFE & STYLE
Cocktail of the
Long Island Iced Tea
15ml White Rum
15ml Triple Sec
Juice of a Lemon/Lime
Dash of Cola
Life & Style Editor
Located just off Osborne Road atop
Mr Q’s, Firenze is truly a hidden
Rising from the ashes of the less
than successful Mettzo, Firenze is a
class above the average Italian eatery in Jesmond.
From its fresh and romantic décor
to the intimacy of the dining room
itself, Firenze is a winner for eveU\WKLQJ IURP ÀUVW GDWHV WR IDPLO\
The starters are presented with an
original touch, such as the foccacia
bread served on individual bread
boards with olive oil and balsamic
As for entrees, the Florentine-style
pot-roasted beef was cooked to perfection, and served with a delicious
combination of creamed potatoes
The pan-fried salmon and king
prawns were also very good, and
the side salads were both fresh and
The presentation of every course
was particularly impressive, which
added to the feeling that Firenze
was more than the average Italian.
The ambience was both warm and
pleasant, with a lively atmosphere
throughout the evening, complemented by good music and good
service from the waiting staff.
The desserts were the highlight of
the evening – the vanilla cheesecake
was sublime. The tiramisu was also
delightful, served in a cup and saucer for an individual touch.
As for pricing, Firenze caters to
both the professional and student
markets alike, with pizzas and pas-
tas from £5.50 and grill orders from
They also do Happy Hour twice
daily Monday – Saturday and a
Sunday lunch menu every Sunday,
with two courses for £12.95.
All in all Firenze is a lovely dining
experience, which is both friendly
and affordable without losing the
touch of class that so many restaurants compromise.
, ZRXOG GHÀQLWHO\ UHFRPPHQG LW
for a lovely meal out.
$V IRU WKH PDLQV P\ ÀOOHW VWHDN
was enjoyable, whilst Clare’s chicken and mushroom risotto tasted
homemade and authentic; all dishes
are freshly prepared in the open
kitchen where you can see the Italian chefs at work.
Dessert proved to be a mixed bag;
while the tiramisu was bang on
the money, the Nutella cheesecake
nearly reduced my companions to
tears. Both devoted followers of the
chocolate spread, I witnessed much
head-shaking and plaintive “This
isn’t real Nutella”.
By this point, I had nearly polished
ZRUWKRI:LQH5DFN·VÀQest vino and needed to leave, so our
cheery host Simon treated us to a
tour of the premises.
The function room is ideal for parties or society events, and as there is
no licence, La Gabbia can stay open
Never one to say no to getting something for nothing, I happily hopped
LQWR D WD[L ERXQG IRU 6KLHOGÀHOG
with my lovely companions Clare
and Larisa to sample the culinary
delights of La Gabbia.
The set menu from which we ordered comes in at £7.99 for two
courses. We shared potato skins and
garlic mushrooms to start, the latter of which Larisa declared ‘amazing’, although bear in mind she also
believes cheese and chutney sandwiches followed by Jaffa Cakes to be
-Juice the lemon or lime
-Fill a highball glass with ice
-Measure the alcohol into a shaker, add ice and juice
-Shake the mixture and strain
into the glass
-Top up the glass with the cola,
stir with a swizzle stick to mix in
As long as the alcohol remains
in equal parts, the recipe can be
made to any quantity desired.
A pitcher or two of Long Island
Iced Tea at a house party will get
things going quickly!
Paracetamol at the ready for the
morning’s hangover, Long Island
Iced Tea is renowned for being a
very strong cocktail!
for as long as you like.
This also means that you can
bring your own drinks, so avoiding
the usual restaurant mark-ups on
If you’re hiring the room you also
have the option of using Spotify, so
if the 80’s pop rock that we were
treated to isn’t to your taste, fear
Lunch is also served and available
to take away in the day, with prices
ranging from £2.50 for a Panini, to
£4.95 for pizza or pasta.
Although the desserts were hitand-miss, the prices and convivial
atmosphere make it worth the trek
off the beaten path.
“Please return to Castle Leazes”
As Freshers’ week ends, and you
are dragged from the drunken haze
of merriment and sweet ignorance
only to be plunged into the harsh
UHDOLW\ RI \RXU REOLWHUDWHG ÀQDQFHV
going out once again becomes a luxury rather than routine.
So, as you proceed to invest both
precious time and money into the
evenings entertainment and have
gone through dilemmas, such as ‘Do
you really think no-one will notice I
\RX IHHO OLNH \RX KDYH TXLWH MXVWLÀably deserved a good night.
The very last thing you want to
hear that night, after the taxi fare
and the painfully tedious queuing,
is that your mate is off her face, completely intoxicated, and needs to be
What follows is the old routine of
the extremely urgent trips to the toilet which, due to the one-in-one-out
queues, prove to be extremely unsuccessful.
Nothing sobers you up more than
having to hold the hair back of the
alcohol victim and pretending to
be deeply touched by her incessant
drivel about how much she loves
you despite only knowing you a
Where you really want to be is on
WKH GDQFH ÁRRU LQ D VZHDW\ PRVK
pit of oblivion, potentially hooking
up with some guy who was eying
you up in your Geography seminar
and which you know full well you’d
regret in the morning.
Yes, it’s quite clear she needs to go
home, but you are determined to enjoy this night- this night cannot be
remembered simply as the night of
Your slightly pathetic cries of
¶*X\V VKH·V ÀQH VKH·V MXVW KDYLQJ
fun’ are met with stony looks from
the rest of your corridor, plus some
extremely judgmental onlookers.
Her effusive agreements from
somewhere inside the toilet bowl
doesn’t seem to sway them either.
What you really want to do is
shove her in a taxi home, put a sign
around her neck saying ‘Please re-
Lesson One: Groceries
I assume you will want to eat at
some stage in your university career. You have at your disposal
many routes to full-cupboard utopia, some costing more than others.
1. Supermarkets (Morrissons
Byker, Asda Gosforth, Sainsbury’s
Heaton). As well as their range,
they are also useful for their quantity of special offers. It is often posVLEOH WR ÀOO D ZKROH WUROOH\ VROHO\
of ‘2 for 1’ offers, and therefore eat
twice as much as usual.
2. Convenience stores (Londis).
&RQYHQLHQFH VWRUHV DUH ÀQH DV
long as you realise that you’re paying for the convenience.
3. Farmers’ markets (Grainger
Market). The relic of Grainger
Market, which opened in 1835, sits
quietly between Monument and
The Gate. Enter this labyrinth of
EXWFKHUV JUHHQJURFHUV DQG ÀVKmongers, and the friendly shopkeepers will sort you out. This is
without doubt the cheapest place
to buy quality fruit and vegetables
'RQ·WEHDEUDQGVQRE([SHULment with own-brand products
and value products and see if you
notice a difference. Some may be
inedible, but many are the same
product as their equivalents which
cost twice as much, just in plain
packaging. Taste with your mouth,
not your eyes.
'HVFHQG XSRQ VXSHUPDUNHWV
within the last hour of closing,
when perishables can be found
at up to 90% off. Either eat your
reduced bargain that day, or preserve it in the freezer for later on
in your life.
,I\RXGRQ·WOLNHWKHLGHDRIOXJging bags back from the shop, you
can get the supermarket to do the
lugging. Tesco, Sainsbury’s and
Asda offer online delivery servLFHV 3HUXVH WKH YLUWXDO DLVOHV ÀOO
your virtual basket with virtual
pasta and beer, then they deliver
items in physical format to your
door. The food prices are the same
as in the shop, but there is usually
an extra delivery charge of £3-£6.
,W PD\ EH \HW DQRWKHU VXSHUmarket-titled website, but mysupermarket.com is one worth remembering. It will reveal which
supermarket is cheapest for your
basket of goods.
2QFH \RXU JURFHULHV KDYH DUrived home, consider the strategy
of cooking in large batches. Foods
such as chili and soup are easy to
make and can be frozen in portions
to provide meals for several days.
Deals of the Week
turn to Castle Leazes-’ and hope she
makes it back all right.
But as the night grinds on, with
more trips to the loo and general
FROODSVLQJRQWKHGDQFHÁRRUWKHLQevitable hits: this night is completely
Even the token do-gooder in the
group (who did the majority of the
hair-holding and back-rubbing) is
So, extricating her again from the
embraces of the large balding Geordie, who- in fairness- she really does
seem to believe is her potential soul
mate, we take our inebriated friend
and head back to the luxury that is
1. Any 2 Topman T-shirts: £8.50 delivered @ topman.com
Fuel Topman’s assault on mens’
fashion with this cheap T-shirt offer. Choose from red ones, black
ones, granddad ones, in fact any
from a range of 40. Enter codes
‘CAMPUS’ and ‘UK15K’ at the
2. Inbetweeners Series 1 & 2 Boxset:
£10 @ Asda instore
Spend your start-of-term wealth
responsibly with a cosy 12 episodes
of suburban adolescent mishaps.
It’s also available for £12.99 @ play.
com. Don’t repeat the quotes this
time though, we’ve already heard
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
LIFE & STYLE
A. YOUNG - 3rd year, Economics and Business Management
Stuck in the Middle East with you
Joshua Shrimpton Dean
The guidebook notes there is ‘one
squat toilet and one reasonably
clean western toilet at the end of the
carriage’ and that you should ‘bring
your own toilet paper as this may
not be supplied’.
The train groaned out of IstanEXO·V+D\GDUSDüDVWDWLRQDV,PDGH
a mental note to start reading such
tips in advance. The small cabin was
my home for the next two days as I
travelled to Aleppo, northern Syria.
Aleppo is described as the most
conservative of Syria’s cities, evident in the most visual sense by
the number of women wearing
the chador. In the most distressing
sense, by the distinct lack of alcohol.
I spent a couple of days exploring
the cool interior of the citadel before
heading to ‘laidback Lattakia’, a seaside town where the young women
‘don skintight jeans and apply their
lipstick lavishly’, according to Lonely Planet.
7KH ÀUVW GD\ ZDV VSHQW ORLWHULQJ
around Lattakia with very little
purpose. The city seemed imposingly industrial, even reaching the
beach involved a complicated minibus journey, bypassing the docked
Although opening up Syria to the
West a little since coming to power
in 2000, Bashar Al-Assad still mainWDLQVDÀUPUHJLPH+LVH\HVIROORZ
you from state-issued portraits that
dominate shop walls, hotels and restaurants.
Damascus was my home for a few
days, the main entry point into Lebanon. I was still in two minds though,
just six weeks earlier 80 people were
killed in clashes between Hezbollah
and pro-government factions.
Beirut once again seemed on the
brink of disaster, just as it was rising
from the devastation of the 2006 horror that left 1,200 dead in 36 days of
crushing Israeli bombardment. An
inexplicable compulsion and sense
of exhilaration pushed me on.
Beirut had been known as the ‘Paris of the Middle East’ and was enjoying a surge in international tourism
prior to the events of 2006. Now, it
was undergoing an audacious and
opulent reconstruction program.
As I walked along the Miami-esque
promenade the atmosphere became
welcomingly vibrant as the locals
enjoyed their swish new city.
In the middle of this lies the infamous Holiday Inn. Commandeered
by militants shortly after opening
in 1975, it was used as a sniper base
during the civil war and pummelled
during the ensuing battles. It is still
there today, riddled with thousands
of bullet holes and missile craters
the size of vans – a sober reminder
of Beirut’s bloody past.
A coach took me back to Damascus
and then another to Amman where I
stayed a night before heading south
to the village of Wadi Musa, a base
for the historical World Heritage
Failing to acquire beer the previous evening was a good thing. I rose
early and headed down to the ruins,
taking in almost everything, including some frightening and overambitious rambling to ensure the best
The Martian landscape was a welcome change after the time I had
spent in cities. The Rift Valley provided a stunning view towards my
next stop and point of exit – Israel.
A few days later I passed through
Jordanian immigration at the southern city of Aqaba and onto a long
high-fenced road, the shimmering
heat obscuring the Israeli border
point some distance ahead. After hours of extensive questioning
and searches I stepped back into
the Western world, grateful for its
abundance of air conditioning, beer
and safe transport. And, of course,
Send your travel pictures to [email protected] and you could win £10 worth
of photo prints as well as your photo printed and framed
1. South East Asia – Gorgeous
beaches exuding sumptuous sunshine by day transform into allnight parties worshipping every
phase of the moon by night. Must
do: venture into Laos and go tubing.
2. Music Festivals – Whether your
vibe is the eclecticism of Glastonbury, dancing ‘til dawn with the
EHVW '-·V DW &UHDPÀHOGV RU URFN
ing it all off at Download, the atmosphere is electric and unmissable! Why not mix it up and seek
out the endless fun at The Secret
3. 6XUÀQJ 8. – The south-west
of England is the perfect place to
unleash your inner surfer right on
our very own doorstep. Go explore
surf heaven as great beaches pepper the region, especially the rolling surf of Cornwall’s north coast.
4. India – Whether you are into
exploring some of the oldest cultural relics in the world, chilling
out on stunning beaches, gorging
yourself on fabulous food or simply meeting incredible people, this
is the country for you. Don’t miss
getting caught up in the chaos of
Mumbai and exploring the roots of
5. 7KH)ULQJH – A true myriad of all
things cultural and creative takes
over Edinburgh’s August every
year. Experience everything from
hard-hitting theatre right through
to the best (and worst!) of comedy,
and into the fantastical world of
the weird and wonderful street
The summer always rushes by and
before you know it it’s September
and you’re packing your bags for
This September I found myself
packing bikinis, journals, and my
passport – to start uni in Barcelona.
What people don’t realise about
this exciting time is how horrendously scary, achingly lonely, and
generally intimidating this experience can be.
There are thousands of students
right now, all over the world in
strange cities, in foreign countries,
missing home and wondering
whether they will meet a friend
In spite of this, all these people
are aware of the fantastic opportunity they have been given, and we
know this is the time to start taking
Barcelona is a city with a buzz.
Go to La Rambla at any time of
day and witness a spectacle of
some of the most bizarre characters you have ever seen, with street
performers, pet vendors – that actually have pigeons for sale - and
Then hop on the metro to the
beautiful Sagrada Familia, one of
Antoni Gaudi’s architectural masterpieces that exist in Barcelona
today. The tall towers and intricate
passing by – and for a bit of home
comfort there is a Pizza Express
right next door.
Back down to the centre and
the grand buildings of Passeig de
Gracia allow you to shop in style,
among smart restaurants, designer
shops, and more of Gaudi’s notorious work that is symbolic of Barcelona city.
So for me, the city is perfect, the
nightlife is vivacious, and the people are friendly...so what is the
It seems we have all forgotten
that – oh yes, we’re supposed to be
speaking in Spanish. The language
is harder to speak than one may
think. A curse has been put upon
us from England as everybody
speaks English. So as we struggle
on swinging from highs to lows,
every day we are all trying to
speak the language we came here
Each day brings new challenges,
such as trying to print something
from a university computer that is
programmed completely in Catalan. Or, wandering around aimOHVVO\WU\LQJWRÀQG\RXUFODVVEXW
realising you’ve gone to the wrong
metro station and are in an industrial estate instead.
All these things add to the feeling at the end of the day – ‘should
I laugh or cry?’ Well, what we
have discovered is, you should
laugh, because it just gets better
from here. To have such a unique
opportunity is a wonderful thing,
and months from now I already
know that I will never want to
leave. This is just the beginning of
our year abroad.
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Culture Editor: Alice Vincent - [email protected]
Let me start by saying that Powerhouse should have been brought
out of the closet!
The implications of Freshers’ Week
advertising it as “one of the city’s
biggest clubs” are widespread and
in my view, contradict the Union
Society’s inclusive and equality orientated ethos.
The issue is not that Powerhouse
sponsored Freshers’ Week 2009, the
issue is that in accepting said sponsorship, the organisers participated
in a heinous campaign to re-brand
it as a straight venue, and also chose
for their own reasons to market it as
The change in ethos from Powerhouse’s marketing worries me
greatly. I feel that homosexuality
has been treated as an institutional
taboo, and by the institution that is
our Union Society.
I have come to the conclusion that
the organisers of Freshers’ Week
2009 must have and could only have
determined that any implication of
‘gayness’ would put the majority
of Freshers off attending the event
– what does that say about the mentality of students here at Newcastle
$UH ZH SXEOLFO\ DQG RIÀFLDOO\
‘okay’ with homosexuality, but privately disgusted and appalled to the
extent that we can’t tread the same
The organisers of Freshers’ Week
2009 have assisted Powerhouse’s
owners, Pure Leisure, in their rumoured aim to market the venue as
a mainstream club.
I personally welcome the inclusion of straight people in gay venues, however people should be
tolerant, unlike the relatively large
but still minor portion of homophobic people who have begun to frequent Powerhouse over the last few
weeks. I do not expect to hear “eugh
Lesbian” and “f******g f**s” ever,
but least of all in a gay club.
The welcoming of straight people
in such clubs can harm the gayVSHFLÀFLGHQWLW\ZKLFKPDNHVVXFK
venues feel like a safe haven for
Therefore, attempts to market
Powerhouse as a mainstream venue
would be grossly irresponsible and
IDLOXUH WR PHHW WKH QHHGV RI /*%7
I do not
expect to hear
“eugh Lesbian” and
“f*****g f**s” ever,
but least of all
in a gay club.
I feel that the Freshers’ Week organisers have assisted in this negOLJHQW WUHDWPHQW RI /*%7 SHRSOH LQ
Newcastle, including the University’s own students, in accepting
sponsorship from Pure Leisure.
The fact that a gay venue must
re-brand itself as straight is a sad
statement of how society really feels
go to so called straight clubs and
bars, so why can’t the straight majority do the same in gay and lesbian
venues, without making offensive
remarks or being tricked into doing so by a clever advertising campaign?
I think branding a gay venue for
whatever social purpose is clearly
the tip of the iceberg, an iceberg of
hidden and archaic attitudes toward
/HVELDQ *D\ %LVH[XDO DQG 7UDQV
In short, I feel that our Freshers’
week contribution to the re-branding of Powerhouse is shameful and
contradictory of all that the Newcastle Student’s Union claims to stand
Freshers’ Week: Art or Antics?
> Freshers review
You don’t need me to tell you how
amazing Freshers’ was.
However, you might need reminding on a few details - I’m sure it’s
not just my week that blurred into
one massive drunken party!
It’s because of this complete blur,
that when I was asked if I’d experienced any ‘culture’ during last week,
my automatic answer was no.
%XWZKDWis culture really? It could
be almost anything, and when you
consider popular culture, I’d say
last week was a pretty good example of ours.
)URP WKH FUD]\ DPRXQW RI Á\
ers we all had thrust at us at every
turn, the fancy dress the freshers
and crew alike rocked, to the nights
themselves, you could argue we
were surrounded by pop culture in
every form - from art to fashion to
music, and much, much more in the
form of day time activities.
We’ll gloss over that I unfortunately missed them because, along with
My personal favourite of last week,
perhaps not the best example of culture - but a wicked night - had to be
the silent disco that spilled out onto
the streets after Freshtival.
After dancing away with everyone
for hours, I took my headphones off
for a minute to look around.
I looked up at the prestigious red
brick walls of our lovely Uni and
then laughed when I looked down
at all the mad Freshers silently raving away in the grounds of this reputable establishment!
So was that a cultural experience?
Well, make of it what you will, I, like
most, loved Freshers’ Week and will
always remember it...well, most of it
Clouded by the two pound trebles,
‘Diesel’ (cider, lager and blackcurrant) and endless pints of ‘Skittles’,
the question could almost be “do
\RX UHPHPEHU ÀQGLQJ FXOWXUH LQ
Looking back over the Freshers’
Week edition of the Courier, it’s
hard to deny that there was plenty
of culture on offer, from viewings
at the independent cinema to surfing, cocktail training and a visit to
Durham – if culture was what you
wanted, culture you could have –
we are in Newcastle after all!
%XW KRZ PDQ\ RI XV DFWXDOO\ JRW
out of bed with that thumping headache in time to make these events?
Within just a few hours of arriving I found myself surrounded by
people from all over the world, and
from places in the UK I had never
even heard of, let alone been.
Everyone was from a different
walk of life, with a different story
to tell and a different accent to tell
it in. Shadowed by the roar of Newcastle’s St. James’, and a sighting of
Ant and Dec, days were spent mimicking each others’ ridiculous slang,
swapping music tastes, and generally discovering what butters your
Freshers’ Week Organiser
The inclusion of Powerhouse (the
capacity of which sets it out as
one of the four biggest clubs in
the city) in Freshers’ Week 2009
marked a step against the trend
over the last few years of clubs
and bars in Newcastle being seen
as either gay or straight.
Pure Leisure, the owners of
Powerhouse, became involved in
the sponsorship of our Freshers’
Week in order to promote a new
student-oriented night on a Monday, which made no claims to be
aimed at people based upon their
Powerhouse took a bold step in
targeting this (student) market
and knew they would have to
overcome many prejudices (from
both gay and straight people).
We were more than happy to
engage in this campaign as it
provided a high quality alternative venue to our Pandamonium
event which, due to the number of
solely in the Union building.
It represents a sad state of affairs
when anyone, gay or straight,
takes offence that a venue moves
towards an inclusionist marketing standpoint and away from the
tag of being, above all else, a ‘gay
venue’. I, for one, feel proud to
represent the Union as it strives
to include everyone in all that it
What did you make of Freshers’ Week?
Laura Tomlinson, Chemistry
so I only got to
three nights, but
was amazing and
really fun too - I
liked the t-shirts!”
Freddie Appleby, Archaeology
“I thought it was
brilliant! All the
events were great
and everyone’s so
I loved getting to
know the city.”
average student’s parsnip.
From ethnic food to local speciDOLWLHV 1HZFDVWOH %URZQ $OH RU
the Middlesbrough ‘Parmo’), raves,
clubbing, alternative cinema, and
the theatre, you start to realise how
EURDG WKH GHÀQLWLRQ RI ¶FXOWXUH· DF
Erin Slack, Archaeology
“I didn’t think it
was that great.
There was too
much drinking for
me! I really enjoyed
the pub quiz
though as it was a
Anna Glenwright, Combined Hons
“It was really good.
I thought Maximo
Park were absolutely great! I didn’t
go to every event
Newcastle is a vibrant place to
manities, but Freshers’ Week alone
gives insight into what we know,
what we believe in and how we behave: ultimately, “the way we do
things around here.”
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
More Culture Chat with Hockey Page 29>>>
with The Futureheads
> Lucy Johnson caught up with the Sunderland
band at the launch of new festival Split
How’s the crowd in Sunderland,
Coming home once you’ve got fans
elsewhere, it’s a bit hard to play after gaining fans in other cities. It’s
a bit of a weird one to play. Once
you break past that your home
crowd is your true home crowd
and they’re proud of you.
Are you excited about the new
Of course, yeah. It’s pretty much all
recorded and done. It’s been quite
a long process as our drummer who’s my brother Dave - him and
his girlfriend had a baby. We’ve
done some of it up here ourselves
in our own space, and also we’ve
done a few sessions with the guy
who produced our third album.
Do you think that’s changed the
sound of it?
Yeah, it’s more rugged, it’s got a
real live feel to it. Then again some
of the songs we did with Youth is
more kind of polished and powerful.
Is there anyone you’re excited
to see today?
All the bands really, I’ve
just watched a band
called Coal Train who
are good friends of
mine, they used to be
in a band called This
Ain’t Vegas who
were great, I really
enjoyed them. I’ve
seen Frankie and the
Heartstrings a few
times now and I’m keen
to see how the audience
take to them.
Will you be watching
So you’re local boys; and what
do you like best about the North
Oh, I just love its culture. People
are lovely - it’s very different to
say, the London culture. I think we
should be really proud of our cultural heritage. The reason why I’ve
got involved in helping organise
this festival is because it’s a crying
shame that Sunderland doesn’t
have one; this is going to happen
every year and it’s going to get bigger and bigger.
in our own accents, but we would
have done that if we were from
anywhere - if we were from like,
the Highlands, we’d sing in our accent if we were from there. I think
being far from the music business,
i.e. in London is a bit of an advantage for a young band, because it’s
quite easy to get swept away in the
circus of London and we’ve never
moved there. We’ve always stayed
up here; it gives us that distance
and creative space.
Yeah, it’s hard to tell when you
are here, to know what life is like
elsewhere, you know? But I think
the 80s were grim, pretty much everywhere in the UK, and I survived
- I was raised with manners, my
parents did quite a good job. I had
a happy childhood - lots of music!
Well, experiences in life. For me
when I sing a song, I have to care
about it. I get very inspired with
a hangover; if I’ve got a bit of a
hangover, it’s almost like my brain
is still open, and if you’re watching
you might start crying; you have
to be able to harness that emotion.
the bands that got us excited were
bands like Fugazi, The Buzzcocks,
The Clash, you know, and more
modern bands as well like Les Savy
Fav, all sorts of stuff really.
And what about the local music
Is there any new music that you
Oh I love it; Newcastle’s isn’t as
tightly knit as Sunderland’s. I’m not
one of those Mackems who
hates Geordies, cause me
parents are both Geordies. I mean, if we can’t
get along with people
who live ten mile away,
then what good do we
have getting on with
people two thousand
Yeah, I really like Frankie and the
Heartstrings, and there’s a band
from Manchester and I can’t believe
how good they are, they’re called
Dutch Uncles – they’re amazing!
Did you enjoy growing up here?
How much would you
Have you played Newcastle Students’ Union?
Yeah, we have, we’ve only played
there once, supporting Shed Seven
about six years ago.
Would you do it again?
Way-aye! We’ll play anywhere,
anytime, any way!
Do you think you’ll sign anyone
to your label?
No, I don’t think so to be honest
with you. It would defeat the object, we would be robbing someone
else of their independence by being
their label bosses.
Although, some bands have asked
to be, like the Von Bondies, they
rang us and said; “We want to be
signed to your label” and we were
What are your plans for the future
Well, fourth album next February,
get that out, maybe play a couple of
hundred shows next year. I want to
have some kids at some point, do
a bit of DJ-ing and keep helping to
organise this festival!
Check out more of Jazzy’s photos
on Flickr :
Do you enjoy playing live?
Oh of course
played in a few
Yeah, of course, you’ve got to try
and enjoy it; when you hear those
bands complain about playing live,
I just think well, why did you want
to become a musician? Because
How does it
him, considering Peter Brewis
used to be in The
with your old
label back in
2006; how is
it having your
Oh I dunno, me
and our Dave have
know the Brewises
for about 12 years,
we’ve been in bands
with them since we
were kids. They’re like
the other side of the
coin; the Hyde brothers were one side, the
slightly scruffy party
animal side and the
Brewis’ were the
Great. We’ve got freedom. Now is
the time to be independent in the
music business; we’re lucky enough
to kind of put our foot in the door,
during the last days when major
labels had any money.
They spent loads of money on
us and promoted us to the nth
degree. We got a fan base, sold
some records, had the ability to
travel; once the label has done that
for you, there’s no real purpose for
them any more, because that’s the
hardest part, is establishing a band.
Now that we have that we’re
interesting ways of promoting
music – there’s a lot of pressure on
bands in the business at the minute
if they’re signed to major labels. We
don’t have that pressure and I’m
very pleased, because it ruins it.
Megan & Maudie
As night sets in, Megan and
Maudie come into their own.
Mornings are not our time. Afternoons are alright, but it is at night
- when the streetlights pollute the
view of the stars - that is when our
blood starts pumping. And no, we
are not a new vampire duo bursting into your paper. We are the 3
am girls. We are here to tell you
about our night-out antics.
Now, last Friday was one of our
name of research) we decided to
go all out, abandoning the typical
student haunts, and head to this
city’s shining beacon of big nights;
it could only be Digital.
Wax:On, the electro-house night
meant heels were relegated to
tonight ladies - for jumping about,
shaking and getting generally
mashed up; there will be no teetering around on ridiculous heels.
On a night like this Digital is not
the place of 80s cheese or indie
classics. Drinks and entry are
hardly student friendly, but it is
on these big nights that the club
seems to come into its own. Fingering alley is empty, no couples
canoodling in the corners; the
The line-up included the ever
impressive Beardy Man - whose
mouth does things your mother
wouldn’t believe - along with the
Eskimo Twins who showed off
their skills, although they barely
made it on time; we bumped into
the pair on our walk down to the
club looking late and in need of
The innovative Doorly also
graced the stage, getting the
crowd excited in anticipation of
his soon to be realised EP on the
Wax:On record label.
The real draw of the night
however was Fake Blood himself,
fresh from the festival circuit. If
you are a DJ-reject like Megan
you may have mistaken this
‘fake blood’ for the dress code
of the evening, but this is what
the crowds were there to see. All
the sets lived up to expectations,
managing to keep us dancing the
whole night through, with samples as diverse as Florence and the
Machine and Abba.
The night pulled in an eclectic
crowd, more students than expected, but nonetheless an entertaining mob to be part of.
Those that stood out were the
indoor sunglass wearing pillocks
- you just draw more attention
to your over-dilated pupils than
necessary; the check shirt brigade
- look around boys, sometimes
stripes are good too! - but the
most spectacular of all was the
Elephant Man; not the real one,
obviously, but a sweaty alternative who decided to wear a child’s
elephant party costume. Natch.
Interesting shapes were beLQJSXOOHGRQWKHÁRRUEXWWKH
most popular dance move of the
evening was what we like to call
the ‘Orangutan’. This consists
of bobbing up and down while
extending arms to look as long
as possible and waving them in
orbit around their body; we are
Some valuable lessons were
learned that Friday eve:
1: When Megan asks Maudie to
describe what kind of music to
expect, not to believe her when
she says, “You’ll love it”.
2: Maudie learned the hard way
that a supportive bra will take you
a lot further when dancing till 4 in
night back on the Toon, but no
doubt there will be many more to
come. Watch out!
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Newcastle’s cultural future examined
We hear an awful lot about culture
in Newcastle these days, even during the recession and even after
the humiliating loss of the Cultural
Capital title to fellow northerners
Liverpool a couple of years back.
Mapping the cultural future of the
city is not as wishy-washy as it may
sound, and these lectures aim to do
The Lit&Phil down near Central
Station is Newcastle’s Victorian gem
of a library; a listed building (the
no less), and a cultural venue worth
a visit on its own.
They have teamed up with the
Mining Institute and Newcastle Philosophy Society to offer a series of
debates about the future of all those
treasured theatres, galleries, cinemas, music venues and public art
that make Newcastle the cracking,
vibrant city it is today.
This is not boring. Cultural awareness is vitally important in the current endless economic misery; as
more people than ever become employed in the creative industries, the
questions raised at these lectures
will shape the way we see our city
for years to come.
Others in the series cover all sorts
of topics, such as the Geordie dialect, polemics on the future from local culture vultures and thoughts on
Newcastle’s past by historians.
Perhaps you get enough of lectures
at university, so do that classic student cheat; skip the series and go
straight to the concluding lecture,
which promisingly aims to turn us
all from passive culture-absorbers
into participants with energy like
those Geordies who give it some on
a Saturday afternoon at St James’
Park, or Saturday night at the Bigg
Philosophy, history, politics, geography and town planning students
Tuesday 13th of October, 6:30pm –
8pm, Mining Institute lecture theatre,
Neville Hall, Westgate Road.
Guide to Geekdom...
> Jake Aiken Winter reports on the Open Storywriting
Zine Session at Star and Shadow this Saturday
with Matt Stoppard
Last Thursday saw the return of
Inertia at World Headquarters, a
monthly independent club night I
have followed closely over the last
However, this night has assumed
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my friends Katie, Joe and Tim, as
we have been provided with an opportunity to get more involved with
the running of the night; an experience which has already proved to
be rewarding even before our debut
For four years Inertia has been
run by students with student interests at the forefront of its approach,
and has proudly stood out as a club
night which offers a valuable sense
of personality, providing familiar
faces behind the slogans and proPRWLRQDOÁ\HUV
We feel that this is an essential
component of any kind of party;
whether it be a house party or at a
club with exciting live acts.
This has informed our promotional work for Inertia so far, as we
have found that talking to people
about our night and gauging their
responses to be far more useful than
Our aim is for Inertia to be a club
night that provokes student input,
ranging from which acts people
want to see to feedback on how to
improve our parties.
)URPZD\EDFNDVDÀUVW\HDUIHHOing slightly detached from the typical midweek student ‘lash’, Inertia’s
inclusive approach proved to be incredibly refreshing, and continually
offered me a platform for meeting
great people and hearing cutting
edge music ranging from techno,
dubstep, dancehall and punk rock.
We’ll continue along these lines
whilst taking the talent on show
up a notch; be assured that this is a
night committed to exposing innovative acts from all areas of alternative music.
This month we had a live dubstep
act in Jazzsteppa, whilst in November we’ll be shifting approach completely to host Smoove and Turrell,
the most exciting funk and soul
band in the UK.
Keeping Inertia fresh is just as
important to us as establishing a
switched-on crowd - its going to be
an unpredictable, roller coaster ride
of a year for this respected student
favourite; be sure to check us out!
The next Inertia is hosted on the 12th
of November @ WHQ: Smoove and
Turrell (Jalapeno Records) + Residents
Sully and Tim Shaw.
Step 1: Eat Breakfast. Step 2: Leaf
through a battered paperback. Step
3: Disappear for 2 hours and write
D ZLOG VWRU\ IXOÀOOLQJ \RXU ZLOGHVW
thoughts and dreams set in the Star
& Shadow Cinema.
There’s a little known modest
arty neighbourhood in the Toon. In
a small warehouse, a group of volunteering hippies while away their
days altruistically tending to a little
:LWK SURÀW WKH ODVW WKLQJ LQ WKHLU
minds, this little slice of community
life set itself the task of spreading
culture to the people of Newcastle.
On 17th October the Star & Shadow
are calling every Geordie and student to come running waving their
writing weapons of choice (typewriters, pens and laptops alike) to
write for their free printed fanzine.
When their eclectic army of story
sculptors has been assembled and
thoroughly breakfasted, they’ll send
them out into the depths of the cinema.
Tales of vampire attacks in the bar
shall be written; lust fuelled affairs
in closets will be speculated over
and murder mysteries in the theatre pondered. At the end of the day,
the sagas will be gathered together
VRPH FRPSOHWH VRPH XQÀQLVKHG
and in fragments) and printed into
way into the hands of all who frequent the cinema.
Clearly this is a chance at Star &
Shadow fame not to be passed up.
Besides, any event that puts breakfast as the number one issue on the
agenda is one that can count me in.
So, I suggest you pluck the forgotten stories from the dusty corners
of your head and bring them along.
And maybe your story will be scouted and met by critical acclaim; that’d
Get Hard to Love @ WHQ
Another ‘alternative night’? Surely
But with the description of being,
“A mixture of hidden gems, forgotten favourites and music that is
made to make people dance”, you
can’t help but be intrigued to see if
it will live up to is claims.
The night has been created as an
answer to the dilemma posed between nights which play the same
indie songs week after week – “oh
great, The Strokes’ ‘Last Night’
again” - and those that go so far to
be individual that they become inaccessible to most people.
When talking to George, one of the
organisers of Hard to Love, a second
year student at Newcastle, it’s a nice
reminder that there are people out
there who want to try something
new, and can be bothered enough to
take the risk.
The night, I’m told, isn’t meant as
a musical education. It’s eager to
please on every level, bridging a gap
they see in the current array of club
nights and really just aiming to have
a good time.
The music provided by local DJ
promises to play everything from
Beastie Boys to Soft Cell, as well as
any obscure requests.
The setting of WHQ appears perfect to give the night that independent feel, and obviously cheap drinks
are also never going to be refused.
At the moment, the night is being
put on as a one off; if it is a success
there are hopes that it could become
a bi-monthly event. Really, it looks
like a very appealing prospect, and
a chance to hear something new.
3HUKDSV ZH ÀQDOO\ KDYH DQ DOWHUnative to ‘alternative nights’.
Freshers’ Week Photos
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Photos courtesy of Sophie Andrews,
Christa Chen, Alice Dewing, Peter Dixon
and Alexander Wilson
For more Freshers’ Week photos please visit
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
Arts Editor: Stephanie Ferrao - [email protected]
Larger than life drawing
classes come to town
> Ciara Littler heads to the Side Gallery for an exhibition that gives
Newcastle’s most famous district a totally different perspective
> How we need look no further than Jesmond
It’s well worth popping into the Side
Gallery if you’re ever down by the
Quayside. The small, tucked away
gallery is currently hosting ‘Byker
Revisited’- a photography exhibition depicting images of the varied
people who live and work in an area
with a history of great development
The exhibition is part of the ‘Reinventing the City’ festival currently
running in Newcastle, and the imDJHVUHÁHFWDGLYHUVHDQGFKDQJLQJ
community. Photographer SirkkaLiisa Konttinen is revisiting Byker
40 years after hosting an exhibition
that portrayed the people and places she observed whilst living there
in the mid 1970s.
A lot has clearly changed in the
forty intervening years. Terraced
houses have been replaced by the
Byker Wall housing scheme, and
the faces photographed are often of
cultures, from all over the globe. But
what hasn’t changed is the sense of
community, albeit perhaps a more
There is a huge diversity of culture, but to all these people, Byker
is still home. Possibly the most interesting aspect of the exhibition is
how the working-class population
of the North East has changed in
some ways, but not in others.
The faces, values and beliefs might
have shifted, but the images capture
a sense of hope, development and
optimism. Konttinen’s images were
taken over a six year period, as she
familiarised herself with the new
Byker community. The large square
images are predominately home
shots, showing the lives of these
people in single frames, capturing a
sense of family, society and often a
kind of patriotism.
I was really taken by one image of
a man covered in Newcastle United
tattoos - a reminder that hope, for
both individuals and the city as a
whole, has yet to falter. The brightly
coloured photographs are evidently
juxtaposed with the gritty black and
white images of the earlier collection, but a lot has happened to this
community since the originals were
In celebrating this exhibition, Kontinnen is working with local leading publishing house Northumbria
Press to produce a book containing
all the photographs from the exhibition accompanied by the stories behind the people involved.
Byker is a reinvented place, and
this collection is a perfect portrayal
Byker Revisited is running at the Side
Gallery until Saturday 31st October.
Calling all Art geeks! Life drawing
lessons are coming to Jesmond!
You don’t need to be a Fine Art
student to take part.
If you have a passion for drawing, sketching live models gives
you the opportunity to develop
really valuable skills, and is probably one of the only occasions
where staring intently at a naked
person is OK!
Forget the fruit bowls, because
drawing human forms is a lot more
detailed– using charcoal, pencil,
graphite, ink and paint, anyone
can develop the techniques to create a masterpiece.
If you’d prefer to be on the other
side of the canvas and pocket a few
quid at the same time, there’s the
opportunity to pose as a model.
Males and females of all shapes
and sizes are welcomed; you just
need to be able to strike a pose for
about half an hour, and (of course)
But don’t worry; just think of
it as something out of Desperate
Romantics, but without having to
freeze to death in a bathtub!
Weekly evening sessions will be
run by a band of dedicated Newcastle students, so whether you’re
a total beginner or a budding Picasso, it’s a fantastic opportunity
to get creative on the cheap.
Though you’ll need your own
equipment, the only other pennies
that need spending are to cover the
cost of the model.
For more information on Life
Drawing classes, contact Beth
McClure at [email protected]
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Are you NUTS about theatre?
> Theatre society President James Bailey chats
about the society’s recent Fringe festival success
and his plans for this term’s theatrical season...
Stephanie: So we hear that NUTS
made the journey to the Edinburgh
James: We took an American play
called ‘Bob’s Date’ to the Fringe –
it’s never been performed in Europe
before so it was a pretty unique experience for us.
It was based on one man’s psyche
as he prepares for a date, so it was
light-hearted comedy and the audiences seemed to enjoy it. Each character played a different aspect of his
personality, so you had aspects of
emotions, memory, logic and libido
all played out.
S: After that success, what have you
got planned for this term?
J: This year we’ve signed up about
two-hundred people. Obviously
they can’t all be in the plays, but
NUTS offers opportunities to work
backstage, on lighting, make-up,
costumes and set design, so there’s
plenty of ways to get involved. This
term we’re doing six plays: ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’, ‘Complete
Female Stage Beauty’, ‘Woman In
Mind’, ‘Cinderella’ for our pantomime, ‘Fame’ – the musical, and for
our Fresher’s play, we’re doing ‘The
Crucible’, for which we’ve already
done the casting.
S: What else does NUTS offer?
J: We also run workshops on acting,
on how to produce a NUTS play,
and on how to direct – it’s really
useful for people who want to get
stuck in next semester. We’re also
planning a day where people can
perform monologues, though that
tends to be for people who want to
apply for drama school.
S: Sounds good. Have you got any
links with local theatres?
J:. In the past, we’ve performed
in the Learning Space of the Theatre Royal, as well as Stage 3 of the
In the Spring term we’ll do six
more plays, and then in the Summer
term we’ll do a two week drama
festival at the Northern Stage which
will feature three student-produced
plays a night: one week for rehearsals and one week of performances.
Because of its length, it shouldn’t
interfere with exams.
We’ve also got plans to kick-off the
year with something new – we’re
performing this year’s Fresher’s
play in the newly-reopened Hancock Museum, so I’m hoping the
rest of the season will be just as interesting.
S: That’s fantastic for a student-run
society, how did it go?
J: We were really lucky and got to
perform in one of the biggest venue
chains in Edinburgh, and performed
there for just under three weeks.
We had a couple of sell-out dates in
the run-up to the end of the festival,
which was fantastic for us: Fringe
Review Magazine actually listed
us as one of the ‘Top Things to See
at Lunchtime’, as well as receiving
some really positive feedback from
S: So you lived in Edinburgh for
the duration of the festival?
J: Yeah, we took seven actors, two
directors and a producer up there
It was great to have other members
of NUTS popping up to visit us and
watch the plays too!
A scene from ‘The Crucible’ - this year’s Freshers’ play
Enjoy A Night Less Ordinary!
> Free theatre tickets?
Too good to be true?
to creative purposes
With the excitement of Fresher’s
Week over, now is the perfect time
to explore the vast cultural scene
Newcastle has to offer.
A Night Less Ordinary is a scheme
that offers you the perfect opportunity to do so! Presuming you are
aged between 16 and 25, you can
bag yourself a free ticket from a colOHFWLRQRIÀIW\IRUHDFKSOD\LQFOXGHG
in the scheme.
There is a wide range of shows,
ranging from comedies to romance,
so there is something for everyone!
If you’ve never been to the theatre
before, this is a new, exciting experience that you can enjoy guilt-free, as
it won’t eat into your student loan!
They will be held at the Northern
Stage (Barras Road, near the Union) and Theatre Royal (Grey Street,
near Grey’s Monument) and you
can view the whole collection of
participating plays on the theatres’
Some of the best picks are from the
Royal Shakespeare Company who
are hosting a range of shows with
some of the best known being ‘A
Keep it green this year with
the Fine Art department
Tender Thing’, ‘Julius Caesar’ and
‘As You Like It’.
The Royal Shakespeare Company
have a reputation that speaks for itself, and it seems mad to pass up an
opportunity to see them for FREE!
Act fast to book your ticket, simply
E\ SKRQLQJ WKH ER[ RIÀFH RU SRSping in, and have a student savvy,
cultural night out with friends, with
a partner or by yourself. Don’t worry if you don’t snag yourself one of
the free tickets, as within the scheme
you can buy a ticket for any of the
associated plays for only £5! Still a
total bargain for a fantastic night
out; one you certainly won’t forget.
So why not try something different? You have nothing to lose and
certainly a lot to gain!
For more information visit www.anightlessordinary.org.uk
If you fancy winning £50 and doing
your bit to go green, the School of
Fine Art wants you to put a creative
spin on recycling and incorporate it
into your artwork!
Recyclable art has never had so
many green credentials: with Newcastle University now recycling 60%
of our rubbish, students and staff
are savvying up to the cost-cutting
advantages of mending rather than
The Fine Art department are hoping to raise awareness of recycling
and sustainability through the medium of sculptures.
University Waste Manager Daniel
O’Connor commented: “Communicating to students about recycling issues in this way will hopefully have
a deeper impact and subsequent action than standard communications
such as emails, posters and inductions”.
The School of Art are encouraging
entrants to think about the bigger
ideas surrounding recycling as well,
such as politics and global warming.
An unusual source of inspiration
certainly, but it’s not unheard of: for
a bit of evidence, check out the double helix sculpture near the Royal
made entirely out of old trolleys!
About 70% of your artwork will
need to be comprised of recyclable
materials, but if you’re stuck for
inspiration, check out the House of
Objects on North Tyneside which
features loads of green ideas, as well
as materials up for grabs!
Entries will be judged by Fine Art
representatives and the University
Sustainability team, and the winner
will be announced on World Environment Day which is the 5th June.
For more details about the competition, contact Daniel O’Connor at
Inside today >>>
Interview with Radio
2’s Jeremy Vine
Culture, page 33
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
The pictures made perfect
> Grace Harvey takes a trip to the Tyneside Cinema, to suss out
Anybody fancy the pictures tonight?
These are words rarely spoken nowadays - nowadays we go to the allAmerican movies at a big cinema
complex with twenty-odd screens.
But something is lacking from
these places. Yes, we go to view the
ODWHVW ER[ RIÀFH KLW DQG VLW RQ RXU
arses for a few hours munching on
ÀYHSRXQG SRSFRUQ 6XUHO\ WKHUH·V
more in a trip to the picture house
than that? This is where the Tyneside Cinema casually steps in.
Originally built in the 1930s, the
Tyneside is one of the only surviving news reel theatres in the country. With four individual screens
and three unique bars spread across
longer synonymous with the rouWLQH,·PVXUH\RX·UHXVHGWR
%DVHG RQ 3LOJULP 6WUHHW QRW HYHQ
ÀYH PLQXWHV DZD\ IURP FDPSXV
there really is no excuse for not being there. They show the pinnacle of
both new and old avant-garde, for-
HLJQ DQG LQGHSHQGHQW ÀOPV ZKLOVW
QRW IRUJHWWLQJ +ROO\ZRRG·V ÀQHVW
too, in possibly the most authentic
priced and over-rated IMAX and be
ready to embrace the future that is
the Tyneside Cinema.
Here, you can relax with a glass of
wine, rather than an extortionately
priced Coca- Cola, and kick back in
the cosy leather sofas of the Classic
Here, each screen has something
different to offer, from the authenWLFVDUWGHFR¶&ODVVLF·VFUHHQWR
WKH FXWWLQJHGJH ¶(OHFWUD· DQG HYH
rything else in-between. All screens
are fully-licensed, so go a little earlier to get a drink from the bar or
stop off in Intermezzo to pick up a
hot cup of Java.
2QH RI WKLV VHDVRQ·V KLJKOLJKWV LV
WKH ¶&XOW &ODVVLFV· VHDVRQ ,W·V DO
ready been running for a week, so
\RX·YH MXVW PLVVHG RXW RQ WKH -RKQ
ÀYH PRUH ÀOPVZLOO EH VKRZLQJ RQ
Monday nights from the 12th OctoEHUÀOPVIURPWKHOLNHVRI*LOOLDP
John Carpenter and David Lynch,
masterpiece, North by Northwest.
This is a one-off chance to view
WKHVH VWULNLQJ RIIEHDW ÀOPV RQ WKH
ELJ VFUHHQ $OVR GRQ·W IRUJHW WKDW
0RQGD\ QLJKW LV VWXGHQW QLJKW 6R
JUDE \RXU 186 FDUG DQG JHW RQ
Not only can you get discounted
tickets but drinks are discounted in
after or take one in with you, but go
for even the soberest of minds.
,I FXOW ÀOPV DQG ÀOP QRLU UHDOO\
DUHQ·W \RXU FXS RI WHD The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, featuring
the late great Heath Ledger, in what
ance, starts on Friday 16th October.
7KHUH·V DOVR RQH ÀQDO VKRZLQJ RI
Dirty Dancing as a tribute to one of
+ROO\ZRRG·V PRVW LQÁXHQWLDO OHJ
HQGV 3DWULFN 6ZD\]H DV IHDWXUHG
For those who want an added or
DOWHUQDWLYH FXOWXUH À[ IURP WKH 7\
QHVLGH JHW RQ GRZQ WR WKH 6SHFLDO
Events that run throughout the
2Q WKH ÀUVW 0RQGD\ RI HYHU\
month, The Polite Room showcases
local songwriters and poets in the
Tyneside bar. These nights do prove
to be very popular and some are
ticketed, but for only a couple of
TXLG LW·V ZHOO ZRUWK LW 2U LI \RX
FDQ·W PDNH LW WR WKH :HVW (QG \RX
can catch screenings of live theatre and opera satellite broadcasts
throughout the rest of October and
There really is something for everyone at the Tyneside Cinema - I
> All you need to know
6HD RQ D )ULGD\ QLJKW PRVW RI XV
This is a real shame, as you could
be missing out on one of NewcasWOH·VKLGGHQJHPVWXFNHGDZD\EH
tween the sumptuous restaurants
$ UHDO WUHDW ZDV WKH FLQHPD·V UH
FHQW H[KLELWLRQ 6LNND/LLVD .RQW
WLQHQ·VByker Revisited. This exhibiWLRQDERXWKHUH[SHULHQFHLQ%\NHU·V
terraced streets and estates uses porWUDLWVDQGÀOPWRFDSWXUHWKHGLYHUVH
nature of urban lives on the estate.
Of Time And The City by Terence
Davis similarly captures the nature
of regional identity and has subse-
quently been described as a ‘love
VRQJ WR /LYHUSRRO· GXH WR LWV IRFXV
The dedication of the cinema to
documentary in the Urban DevelopPHQWVHDVRQRIÀOPVKDVJLYHQDUHDO
splash of culture to the city in the last
month. Along with this, the cinema
has also continued to re-screen classics, my favourite being Get Carter,
starring a rather youthful-looking
7KDW·V QRW WR VD\ LWV DOO FXOW FODV
sics and documentary. Coming up
is the global blockbuster Independence Day ZKR GRHVQ·W ORYH D ELW RI
Standing in The Shadows of Motown
incorporates interviews and performance dedicated to the history
of pop music, meaning it should be
set to have one hell of a soundtrack
with both covers and original Motown recordings.
Following up this is Cadillac
Records, which focuses on such
blues legends as Muddy Waters,
Etta James and Chuck Berry. It also
ent. Despite what you think of her,
\RX FDQ·W KHOS EXW EH EORZQ DZD\
The one on my must-see list though
is Time Will TellDÀOPGHSLFWLQJWKH
powerful message of reggae through
the life story of the legendary Bob
Marley. A guaranteed feel-good
SHUIHFW IRU RXU WLJKW EXGJHWV 7KH
cosy 44 capacity cinema is an ideal
off-beat alternative, showing some
insightful and equally entertaining
With authentic seating including
rare doubles to nuzzle up together,
and a charming cafe that opens thirty minutes prior to screenings, its
intimate atmosphere means it really
is a venue to fall in love with.
dance on Tyneside
>In honour of the late
star, the Tyneside
From the opening music of The
Ronettes to that dance routine, Dirty
Dancing has become a classic.
The main appeal for me and most
females, I suspect, is the uncomproPLVLQJ FRROQHVV RI 3DWULFN 6ZD\]H
7KH VWRU\ RI VZHHW GDGG\·V JLUO
)UDQFHV ¶%DE\· +RXVHPDQ IDOOLQJ
in love with sexy dance instructor
Johnny Castle is one that continues
to capture the affections of thousands of women across the globe.
pact twenty years on.
The main reason for its success is
the unquestionable talent of its main
This passionate, heart-warming
classic is enough to set pulses racing
and will manage once again, as it
did twenty years ago, to make every
woman at the cinema screening fall
in love with him.
Dirty Dancing ZDVWKHÀOPWKDWFDW
phenomenon he became. After the
ÀOP·V VXFFHVV 6ZD\]H FRQWLQXHG
to tug at heartstrings in Ghost, but
also proved his versatility alongside
Keanu Reeves in Point Break and
Following his tragic death last
month, the Tyneside Cinema have
organised a tribute to the star,
made him the legend he was.
The cinema has undergone a massive refurbishment over the past 18
months and was temporarily based
2Q WKH HYH RI WKH FLQHPD·V UH
opening last March, there was an
outdoor screening of Dirty Dancing
to be a huge success.
The Tyneside Cinema said, “Following the success of the screening
last March for the re-opening of our
We decided to screen it once more
the actor as it seems a perfect way
for us to honour his life.”
+RZHYHU \RX VSHQG \RXU 6DWXU
17th October falling in love all over
again with the legend that is Patrick
I guarantee you will have the time
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Dir: Jonathan Mostow
Starring: Bruce Willis, Radha Mitchell
Runtime: 88 mins
STDs, unwanted pregnancies, addiction, humiliation, hatred, pain,
murder; all have become things of
the past. You can be whoever you
want, do whatever you like, and
live each day without fear. Sounds
like paradise, doesn't it?
This is the world of Surrogates,
where humans have opted out of
WKHLU ÁHVKO\ HQWDQJOHPHQWV IRU WKH
comforts of synthetic doppelgangers. But when a mysterious weapon
threatens to shake this sanctimonious way of life, it's up to FBI agents
Tom Greer (Bruce Willis) and JenQLIHU3HWHUV5DGKD0LWFKHOOWRÀQG
it, before billions of human lives are
Clearly, this is the kind of blockbuster fare that has come to domiQDWH VFLÀ FLQHPD 7KH SORW FDQ EH
seen as a blend of I, Robot and Minority Report. It's far from original,
and suffers from being on the verge
of cliché throughout. But that said,
LW LV D VDWLVI\LQJ VFLÀ URPS HYHQ
with the foreseeable twist.
Bruce Willis performs with a bit
more heart and soul than his previous badass cop roles, and there's
no denying that the Die Hard star is
The special effects are also certainly something to boast about - Director Jonathan Mostow ensuring all
his actors look perfectly doll-like.
The sudden transition from Willis'
robotic body-double to faltering
I would, however, have expected
WKH ÀOP WR RIIHU PRUH RI D VRFLDO
comment, given that the loaded
FRQWHQW RI WKH ÀOP RSHQV XS WKH
possibility to explore more in-depth
topics like issues of identity, and
This makes for a run-of-the-mill
action thriller that is more in-tune
with I Am Legend than Children
of Men. Though I suppose one
shouldn't expect much from the
director of Terminator 3: Rise of the
So if you’re craving something
that’s minimal effort, Surrogates is
\RXU WLFNHW %XW LI LW·V VFLÀ VRPHwhat more poignant that you’re after, then you are better off looking
elsewhere; perhaps Duane Jones'
As a huge fan of the hero that is Gervais, I was initially skeptical about
what the trailers perceived to be a
cutesy Rom-Com based loosely on
Liar Liar. I was thrilled that in fact
it was rumoured to be.
Basically The Invention of Lying is
set, as the title would suggest, in
a world where everyone tells the
truth, no matter how brutal the
truth may be.
This fact alone leads to a rather
good satirical comment on consumerism in general, where Pepsi is advertised with the by-line ‘for when
there’s no Coke’ - so true.
In said world, Gervais plays average downbeat guy (as per) Mark
%HOOLVRQ ZKR KDYLQJ EHHQ ÀUHG
Garner), gains the ability to lie.
The actual moment of the invention of the lie is explained, somewhat lamely, by a malfunctioning
This would lead me to question
why the title was changed from
the original The Other Side of the
Truth, which seems more appropriate, as the invention is not really the
Mark soon uses his new found
DGYDQWDJH IRU EHQHÀFLDO JDLQ 7KLV
evolves from the initial materialistic reaction to hit the casino, into
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getting the girl. However it is Bellison’s little white lie that he tells
his dying mother where the comedy gets good and is turned, with
a huge nod to The Life of Brian, from
a run-of-the-mill Rom-Com into
This lie being that when you die
you are not simply worm food, but
go to a special land where everyone
is happy and everyone gets a mansion.
After this lie is spread, Mark is
forced to explain it by inventing a
ÀFWLWLRXV¶PDQLQWKHVN\·ZKRFRQtrols earth…..sound familiar?
This has lead to some critics callLQJ WKH ÀOP DQWL&KULVWLDQ %XW LQ
the world of the free what are you
gonna do? If anything, a lick of conWURYHUV\ ZLOO DGG WR WKH ÀOP·V DSpeal in the U.K.
VXFK D SRSXODU ÀOP DV VLQFH WKHQ
WKH ZKROH GDQFH ÁLFN JHQUH KDV
been done to death - at some points
I felt like I was watching a strange
mixture of Save the Last Dance and
High School Musical.
The biggest fault with this was the
lack of emotional attachment to the
characters. Most of them come with
x-factor style sob stories. But when
these problems are resolved there is
In fact, the main feeling I felt was
scepticism towards the characters.
All seemed to be introduced as the
´EHVW GDQFHUVLQJHUZKDWHYHUµ LQ
WKH VFKRRO 0RVWO\ WKLV LV MXVWLÀHG
but in some cases you are left thinkLQJ´UHDOO\"µ
However, director Kevin Tancharoen is certainly one to watch. His
background as a famous choreographer, working with the likes of Britney Spears, is obvious. And where
At least one star of the three and a
This is where shy student Naturi
Naughton lets it all out, singing to
the wonderful remix of ‘Fame’s’
most famous song, ‘Remember my
Kudos also to Tancharoen for using a whole bunch of newbies in his
cast with only a few old favourites
knocking about, like Megan Mul-
lally (Karen in Will and Grace), who
plays a teacher at the school. This
GHÀQLWHO\ SDLG RII DV LQ WKH VRQJ
DQGGDQFHÀHOGWKH\DUHPRVWO\H[tremely talented (acting, as previously mentioned, is a little thin on
Long and short, you get what you
go for really. Cringe through the dialogue to get to the show-stopping
singing and dancing which is something I guarantee you’ll remember.
Although the Soloist reaches no
rounded conclusion, this is a refreshing change from the usual unrealistic epiphany found in HollyZRRGÀOPV
Instead of a happy ending you
have a situation where audience
to terms with the fact that Nathaniel cannot and does not want to be
saved or cured, and there is little
hope of him ever returning to his
old way of life.
The presence of Robert Downey Jr.
and Jamie Foxx alongside newcomer
Nelsan Ellis, from the US series True
Blood, undoubtedly provides the
Jamie Foxx, for instance, once again
shows his talent for bio-pics. For the
role, Foxx went to new lengths in
method acting and learnt the cello
The Ray star also ground his teeth
down to create a more authentic
/RSH]·V RULJLQDO FROXPQV IURP
which the book was created, won
over the hearts and minds of LA
through its daily and weekly instalments. On screen however the plot
seems stretched too thin over the
It seems as well that the personal
JURZWK RI 6WHYH /RSH] GLIIXVHV DWtention from Nathaniel - the character the audience wants to learn
about the most.
DW /RSH] FRQIURQWLQJ KLV GLYRUFH
and the ethics of his friendship with
Nathaniel during the course of the
Nathaniel remains as elusive
WKURXJKRXW WKH ÀOP DV KH LV LQ UHDO
OLIH ZLWK RQO\ D VHULHV RI LOOÀWWLQJ
ÁDVKEDFNV WR ÀOO LQ DQ\ QHFHVVDU\
gaps in his history.
$OWKRXJKWKLVGRHVUHÁHFWWKHVRFLeties relationship to the homeless on
Dir: Ricky Gervais, Matthew Robinson
Staring: Ricky Gervais, Jennifer Garner, Rob Lowe, Jonah Hill
Runtime: 100 mins
Dir: Kevin Tancharoen
Starring: Naturi Naughton, Asher
Book, Collins Pennie.
Runtime: 155 mins
Fame is the remake of the 1980s classic which follows the stories of several teenagers as they try to prove
their talent at the New York School
of Performing Arts.
The sentiment of talent as a way
to the top is certainly refreshing in
a time of Paris Hilton and Chantelle Haughton, but sadly the story
line is pretty generic with generous
dashings of cheese.
This was always going to be the
problem with doing a remake of
Dir: Joe Wright
Jamie Foxx, Robert Downey Jr.
The Soloist is a true life tale, based
RQ 6WHYH /RSH]·V ERRN RI WKH VDPH
name. Following the LA Times writHU'RZQH\-UWKHÀOPWHOOVRIKLV
encounter and gradual friendship
with Nathaniel Ayers, a homeless
man and talented violinist.
/RSH]·V LQWHUHVW EXLOGV DV $\HUV·
past reveals him to be a former cellist and Julliard pupil, who as a sufIHULQJVFKL]RSKUHQLFKDVEHHQOLYLQJ
on the streets of LA’s Skid Row, in
the shadow of his former glory.
As the latest offering from Joe
Wright of Pride and Prejudice and
Atonement fame, the viewer should
certainly not expect a light-hearted
Jonathan David Lim
ring about Ricky’s way of performing within the context of a polished
Overall it seems that a good idea
is let down by an average plot.
However, the orgy of big name
cameos is enough to make me recommend it.
Seymour Hoffman as the bartender and Edward Norton as the trafÀF FRS DUH HFOLSVHG WKRXJK E\ WKH
cameo from Steve Merchant and
….wait for it…Barry from Eastenders! Inspired.
those at LAMP, where Wright used
real-life homeless people as extras.
This gives a chance for the audience to see the people behind the
statistics - 84,000 sleep rough every
night in LA and over 250,000 are
homeless at some point in a year.
The Soloist is a thought-provoking
into the lives of those who are normally hidden away from public attention.
7KH VFRUH LV DOVR GHÀQLWHO\ ZRUWK
any money spent to see it.
e ti his week
ay your halls t
this staff around
l P Wired promo
erson Look out for
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Music Editors: Mark Corcoran-Lettice and Chris Mandle - [email protected]
Courier Culture spoke to Benjamin
Grubbin and Anthony (Tony) Stassi
from Hockey before their gig at the
O2 Academy, where they told us
about famous friends, water features
and the biggest musical showdown
CM: Why did you pick the name
T: Oh man, we get asked this so
CM: I saw an interview with the
tagline ‘Hockey couldn’t give a
puck’. I liked that.
T: That’s clever!
CM: How is everything going on
early, but the reaction over here has
in the US, but over here, it seems
CM: What are your support acts
T: They’re cool, Little Comets are
supporting us and they really get
WKH FURZG JRLQJ UHDOO\ HQHUJHWLF ,
B: I think they’re from Newcastle,
CM: How would you describe your
music to someone who’s never
heard Hockey before?
indie music, but I guess some of it is
% 7UXH, PHDQ FRXQWU\ VLQJHUV
have big guitars, so they could reDOO\KXUWLIWKH\KLW\RX
T: Are weapons involved?
&0 :HDSRQV DUH GHÀQLWHO\ LQ
T: Ravers have glowsticks, like they
CM: Like a neon octopus.
7 , ORYH WKDW GHVFULSWLRQ 5DYHUV ²
CM: I know a guy who has played
a gig with Little Comets.
tween a country musician and a
T: (Sarcastic) What a claim to fame!
T: I don’t know what the plural is?
CM: Do any of you guys have famous friends? Any stories?
B: Well ravers are usually on pills,
CM: I think we can assume this
try singers and ravers will be a never-ending one. Even worse if goths
back home, and like, if we have any
CM: Ah, but that would make them
CM: What do you guys do when
you’re on tour? Do you chill out or
explore the cities?
CM: I love that place. Did you?
B: It depends when and where we
DUH 6RPHWLPHV ZH JHW WR KDQJ RXW
a bit, like we were playing in ShefÀHOGDQGZHKXQJRXWWKHUHIRUWKH
&0 6KHIÀHOG KDV D ORW RI ZDWHU
features. Did you feel an urge to
jump in the fountains and splash
B: Well we didn’t get to see much in
T: We went out when we were in
CM: Where did you go?
T: Umm Leadhouse?
Hockey’s debut album, Mind
The Debate: Not fair or silly Allen?
> Each week, Courier
Culture’s music scribes
mouth off about the big
sonic issues of the day
- why not write in and
tell us what you think?
This week: Do you agree
with Lily Allen’s views
First of all, I’d like to ask - why has
it taken this long for a major artist
to raise this point?
I totally agree with Lily Allen’s
EORJ DERXW LOOHJDO ÀOHVKDULQJ ,W·V
taking money away from so many
talented artists, hitting new bands
the hardest as they are the ones who
But I think that the real issue that
needs to be addressed is why people resort to illegal music sharing in
The price of albums, either in their
CD format from outlets, or from
websites such as iTunes, is quite
With the average chart album costing around £10, people often don’t
want to spend that much on an album, especially if they want to purchase a few albums a week, or are
cash-strapped students who wish
So when offered the alternative of
RQOLQH ÀOHVKDULQJ WKDW·V IUHH ,·P
not surprised people opt for the ilOHJDORSWLRQ:LWKVRPDQ\SHRSOH
doing it, it doesn’t seem to be such
a serious crime in many people’s
I think the problem needs to be
addressed, and I’m behind Lily AlOHQ·V ÀJKW DJDLQVW LOOHJDO ÀOHVKDU
LQJ %XW , GR IHHO WKDW WKH SULFH RI
When talking to a friend in a band
DERXW ÀOHVKDULQJ WKH\ EHFDPH LQ
‘Stealing’ is how they described it,
But I then proposed the issue of
how he was supposed to get people
to listen to his music in this day and
It appears that for many acts, including Lily Allen, poster girl of
the MySpace phenomena in her
early days, it may be a necessary
music, especially at the early stages,
but how are they supposed to get
people interested if they can’t ac-
cess it easily?
Obviously there are many ways
to access music, but people have
been accustomed to this process of
ZD\ WR ÀJKW LW ² SHRSOH QR ORQJHU
That poses a question, can you
battle something this big, or do you
have to accept it as unavoidable obstacle?
It doesn’t help of course, when
there are acts who can afford to give
their music away for free, perhaps
setting a precedent which makes
For me, it’s no longer an issue of
whether it’s right or wrong; it simply seems that realistically, nothing
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
Seen and Scene
What we’re listening to
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Shrines, Jack of Hearts
The Other Rooms,
The Boxer Rebellion,
The Other Rooms,
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THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Singles & Downloads
Splitting The Atom
Now it’s not often a really good band goes AWOL.
Indeed, in my lifetime I can only
think of about three hideous cases; Incubus apologising for Science, Guns
‘n’ Roses letting Axel loose alone and
Smashing Pumpkins employing a
However annoying, whenever this
happens it’s a tragedy, and usually
marked by an impromptu EP release.
This says “we’re not quite dead yet,
but we’re too at odds/bored/high/
unimaginative/busy doing community service (delete as appropriate) to write an album, sorry guys”.
Sadly – and you probably grit
your teeth while reading – this may
have happened to Massive Attack.
Put simply, Splitting the Atom
is confusing. You shove it into
your CD drive (I’m old-school!)
in anticipation of soaring synths,
writhing vocals and ethereal beats.
Yet instead you’re met with
the album’s title track, which
when played at their recent Newcastle gig some kid shouted,
“Where’s Marilyn Manson then?”.
Now imagine Mr Manson k-holed,
writing music at a ket party, for a
ket party, and we’re almost there.
It’s clunky and awkward, and the
uber-generic yet relentless chord
progression insinuates somebody’s
backstage chums with Status Quo.
Even more frustratingly, track two
‘Pray for Rain’ is almost worse.
Easily mistaken for a Mighty Boosh
piss-take, all they need are some
‘crimps’ and it’d be cool, almost...
Despite all this, ‘Splitting the Atom’
was Zane Lowe’s ‘Hottest Record of
the Week’, which seems potentially
vindicated by the last two tracks (yet
one still dreads the other contenders).
Although not comparable to usual
Massive Attack brilliance, ‘Psyche’ is
at least an adequate bath-time/yoga
accompaniment. ‘Bulletproof Love’
Poetic, sensuous and clever,
it’ll join ‘Teardrop’ in any ‘cliff
top sunset’ playlist.
To whoever their muppet producer was,
that was your single right there!
Despite being slightly suspect
that the only two decent songs on
this EP are other peoples’ remixes,
if diehard fans want a listen and
your student loan’s not holding out,
save yourself a breakdown and just
Hardcore heroes Converge return at the end of the month with
new album ‘Axe to Fall’, and
over on their MySpace you can
hear two exclusive new tracks,
‘Axe To Fall’ and ‘Dark Horse’.
But be warned, it sounds like
the new record will have enough
energy and crushing riffs to bring
down the walls around you!
For something more danceÁRRUIULHQGO\ %ULWQH\·V ODWHVW
release, ‘3’, was released last
week on iTunes. Is it or isn’t
it about a threesome? Who
knows! Check it out and decide
for yourself (send in answers
on a postcard if you like…)
1RZ LI WKH LQGLH GDQFHÁRRU LV
more your scene, then I’d highly
recommend Mando Diao’s ‘Dance
With Somebody’, an act who apparently count boxing champ
Vladimir Klitschko as a fan, and
they certainly pack a punch!
Cheesy puns aside, this Swedish
get the toes tapping - think Franz
Ferdinand playing gritty garage
rock with some funky synth bass
and a smattering of Gang of Four.
Finally, local lads Smoove and
Turrell are another band worth
investigating with their fresh take
on Northern soul, with ‘Beggarman’ sure to be cause a scene on
the World Headquarters danceÁRRU HDFK DQG HYHU\ ZHHNHQG
get ‘Bulletproof Love’ on iTunes.
As the Geordies say, for future
Massive Attack releases...haway!
A Sunny Day In Glasgow
Everything Goes Wrong Ashes Grammar
Hockey have been one of those
bands. Their early releases were
lauded with typical bloggy fervour,
before being turned on and lambasted for their ‘fashionable’ image.
Now, after numerous festival appearances, they have a remade, remastered version of their 2008 debut
album, Mind Chaos.
If there’s one thing that can be said
about the album, it’s that it’s never
short of ideas.
The hipster prerequisites are
present - indie, post-punk, dance EXWWKHUHDUHÁHFNVRIVRXOFRXQWU\
classic rock and god knows what
else all over the record.
It can seem a little tumultuous
at times, but singer Ben Grubin’s
Casablancas-Dylan lovechild vocals
hold it together, giving the album a
It all sounds unforced too - this
isn’t a band who’ve had to meticulously construct what they want,
and they seem to have a knack for
some pretty catchy anthems, with
‘Learn To Lose’s riotous conclusion
This is a very good indie-pop
record, and could have been superb if was a little more cohesive,
but Hockey have enough up their
sleeves to come back bigger and better.
Surely, 2009 will go down as the
year that the second-album curse
died an ignoble death, with superb
efforts from even the most surprising quarters – did anyone seriously
expect The Horrors to pull that out
of their sleeves? Now, with Fuck
Buttons’ triumphant Tarot Sport,
there’s another stunning sequel.
That’s not to say that those who
enjoyed last year’s debut, Street
+RUUVLQJ ZLOO ÀQG WKHPVHOYHV LPmersed in an entirely alien sound:
- the scorched-earth drone and migraine-inducing synth sounds are
all present and correct here.
noise apocalypse, Tarot Sport wields
distortion to create life, rather than
Opener ‘Surf Solar’ immediately
sets the scene with beats far more
intricate and jubilant than anything
we’ve heard from them before, and
by the time ‘Flight Of The Feathered
Serpent’ appears almost a hour later,
the record’s metamorphosed into an
ecstatic, experimental rave.
Where they may have once been
a chin-stroking proposition, Fuck
Buttons are now perhaps one of
the most distinctive dance acts this
“THIS ALBUM SHOULD BE
PLAYED LOUD!” is the advice
given in neat bold capitals on the
reverse of ‘As Seen Through Windows’.
The album demands your full attention for the newest orchestral cacophony on the block.
Intense and heady stuff not suited
to the music enthusiast who likes to
skip and skim from track to track or
looking for an idle 5 minute break,
Bell Orchestre build complex melodies and complicated solos that
weave together gradually through
eight tracks, until the album’s climax is reached in its ultimate 52nd
It makes for hard listening and
perseverance is required, but when
you arrive, it’s worth it.
Truly, this epic album is the soundtrack to your life. Without words it
speaks only through its symphonic
instruments, revisiting your own
trips of elation, sorrow and melancholy from your past.
It picks up, falls off, and whirls
through your mind painting the
inside of your skull in technicolor.
Bell Orchestre have a clear vision of
how classical music should adapt to
survive in today’s world of scratchy
guitars and soulless synths.
This is real music for the 21st Century.
The second album from Brooklyn
hipsters Vivian Girls follows the
The 60s girl band style three-part
harmonies are still in place, but
when teamed with the buzzing
guitars and some shoegaze-style reverb, the separate components complement each other perfectly.
‘When I’m Gone’ is Vivian Girls at
their best - all-jangle pop and sugary harmonies, which swirl together
under a sea of distortion to create a
lovely dreamlike feel.
There’s a genuine sense of Shangri
- La’s-esque teen heartbreak at play
throughout, which only adds to the
wistful retro appeal.
‘Tension,’ the gem on this album,
shows the girls to be capable of
moodier, less breezy moments. The
vocals are delivered with a bratty,
semi-bored howl, while the lyrics
themselves can barely be deciphered
under the layers of fuzz.
Everything Goes Wrong is certainly not ground-breaking and
never strays too far from tried and
tested formulas, but if Vivian Girls
continue to make fuzzy guitar-pop
that’s this addictive, who are we to
A Sunny Day in Glasgow are an apt
example for those music intelligentsia out there who want to debate the
EUHDNGRZQ RI JHQUHV DV D GHÀQLQJ
term for music in the modern age.
A Sunny Day in Glasgow eschew
traditional pop song structures on
second album Ashes Grammar, in
favour of dreamy, ambient soundscapes that wouldn’t sound awry
on a Brian Eno or Tangerine Dream
Guitars wash over tons of meandering synth droning and distant
drums played at the bottom of a
well with particular effect, especially on standout tracks such as ‘Shy’
and ‘Passionate Introverts’.
Of course, proceedings wouldn’t
be complete without a healthy dose
of noise and mild cacophonia, as on
their track ‘Failure’.
Unfortunately, going right through
Ashes Grammar, one gets the feeling that the ideas in this sophomore
effort could have been better and
further developed with a bit more
Nevertheless, Ashes Grammar
is quirky, dispassionate rainy day
music, with the only caveat that listening to it too actively will start annoying you after a few plays.
As Seen Through Windows
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
TV & Radio
TV & Radio
TV & Radio Editor: Aimee Philipson - [email protected]
Five, 5pm Mondays
Off the Hook
BBC3, 8pm Thursdays
C4, 10pm Wednesdays
COURTESY OF C4
COURTESY OF BBC3
COURTESY OF FIVE
BBC1, 9pm Sundays
COURTESY OF BBC1
this week in the land
where anything is
TV & Radio Editor
If, like me, you’ve missed the plethora of American-imported TV pheQRPHQRQV RYHU WKH ODVW ÀYH \HDUV
including the apparently excellent
Lost and 24, you have an opportunity to get in from the start with
The series starts as everybody in
the world blacks out for 2 minutes
and 17 seconds, during which time
they see their future.
If the programme followed fellow
students we’d probably see a mundane series of nights out and 2:2s,
but luckily for us the story revolves
around FBI investigator Mark Benford, played by our very own Joseph
It’s Benford’s job to try and make
sense out of people’s visions, but
his own future didn’t look too rosy
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work whilst people are trying to kill
him, and he sees his wife with another man.
The series began on 28th September and there was plenty to get
you hooked. The disaster of the
blackout is particularly impressive
as everybody suddenly freezes in
the middle of their working day.
One man even manages to set himself alight as he gets out of his car.
The series looks promising. The only
it amongst the other blockbuster
U.S dramas in your schedule.
edy series to target the late teen/
early twenties market.
Following the trials and tribulations of main character Danny’s
bisodes’ last year on BBC Switch.
UK comedy programme to evolve
from online episodes to a television series comprising of seven 30
‘worst best mate’ from school
Shane (big, ginger and just plain
annoying), the feisty Scarlet and
permanently pessimistic Fred
(played by James Buckley (Jay)
from The Inbetweeners).
It’s safe to say that some of the
scenes are unrealistic as they don’t
paint a true picture of student life
(no swearing?!) and the acting is a
little wooden in parts.
identify with Danny who succeeds
in embarrassing himself in front of
numerous crushes and lives in typiFDOVWXGHQWVTXDORUVWROHQWUDIÀF
It may not be winning any awards
for originality, but if you fancy
reminiscing about the joys of being
Catch it at 8pm on Thursdays on
BBC3 or on BBC iPlayer.
If you’re missing the days when
Kiefer Sutherland was a Lost Boy
or you’ve got Twilight withdrawal
symptoms (you know who you are),
here is something to get your teeth
True Blood is the sizzling American vampire series arriving on British TV this month and it promises
not to disappoint.
Throw together a busty telepathic
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and a dead-end town in Louisiana, and it’s no surprise when the
camera cuts to the bedroom. But if
you’re looking for more than vampire erotica, the story isn’t half bad
Adapted from the Sookie StackKRXVH QRYHOV E\ &KDUODLQH +DU
ris, True Blood centres on a world
where, thanks to a manufactured
bloodlike substance, vampires no
longer need to kill to survive.
A race war ensues as the vampires
Add some ‘fang-banger’ murders
(yes, that’s girls who get intimate
with vampires) and a love triangle,
and you’re addicted for the next
Other characters to watch out for
include an un-dead Civil War veteran and a guy who can turn into
animals, not to mention hot Ryan
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7th but you can still catch it on 4OD.
The series continues on Channel 4
on Wednesdays at 10pm.
Introducing the BBC’s new adaptation of Jane Austen’s novel ‘Emma’.
In the format of four one-hour
shows over the next month, the
series has allowed the development
of the many characters and subplots that a feature length would
not permit - so fans of the book
need not be worried that too much
of the plot, charm and humour
will be lost. The director wanted to
bring the adaptation into the modern age without losing its place in
history, so modern body language
was added among the curtseys.
The lead is taken by Romola
Garai, who starred in Atonement,
subtle facial expressions really portray exactly what Emma thinks of
everyone and everything. Michael
Gambon, who plays Emma’s father,
portrays Mr Woodhouse’s quirks
brilliantly and helps bring humour
and lightness to the story.
Overall the adaptation looks gorgeous, the house and costumes are
beautiful and the characters leap
from the pages of Austen’s book.
The four part series started Sunday 4th October and will continue
next Sunday on BBC1 at 9pm.
Catch up on BBC iPlayer.
Check out www.thecourieronline.
co.uk/culture to see what a Victorian Literature student made of the
> Can you dance to Dirty Diana? Swing to Smooth Criminal? Belly dance to Billie Jean?
ing at the man in the mirror and wondering if you’ve got the bad moves
to beat it WR WKH ÀQDOV RI D QDWLRQDO
Well you’ve got to be there at the auditions for the new BBC dance show
‘Move like Michael Jackson’ this
I know you think you can’t take
anymore Michael this year, but
don’t stop ‘til you get enough (last one
I promise) of his legendary music
and dancing with a new King of
Pop-inspired dance competition.
The contest encourages dancers
from all backgrounds, from bhangra
to ballet and hip hoppers to body
poppers to come down to the auditions and show the judges their
The judges, including Jackson 5
legend Jermaine Jackson, are not
looking for someone who mimics Michael’s moves but somebody
who is inspired by his creativity, has
their own iconic style and who demonstrates showmanship.
Groups and solo dancers over the
age of 16 are welcome at the auditions which will take place in:
This Monday, Owen returns to
the Square, but what is he up
to? There’s tension in the Slater
household as they come to terms
with Stacey’s absence. Sam bonds
with Janine, and Shirley’s new job
is going as well as she thought…
Leila, Ravi and Anita throw a
house party to cheer themselves
up, but things get out of control.
Cue a series of bed-swapping aftershocks, as Elliot is left reeling
after Leila tells him she slept with
Archie, Sheila is feeling awkward
after sleeping with Elliot and Anita apologises to Theresa for kissing Newt.
Gennie leaves Faye curious after
talking about Katie’s chequered
SDVW DQG +ROO\ FRQWLQXHV WR WR\
with Aaron who is still trying
to woo her. And the question of
Move like Michael Jackson
TV & Radio Editor
Lloyd regrets spending the night
with Teresa and tries to sneak
off - just in time, as Liz is about
to apologise to him and tell him
she wants to give ‘them’ another
go. But who will be keeping his
sheets warm by the end of the
week? Meanwhile, across the
Street, Maria and Tony endure a
GLIÀFXOW IDPLO\ PHDO ZLWK +HOHQ
- week beginning October 19th
If you are interested, request an
application form at [email protected] or call 0207 428 4632.
The six-part dance series will be
broadcast in December for one week
but doesn’t tell Declan, so that
he doesn’t put his life in danger
by hunting down Johnno. But
a story about him, leaving him
Ringo is struggling with his work
until Karl steps in with a surprising study method.
Home and Away
Nicole becomes more obsessed
with Sid and starts to follow him
everywhere, even exaggerating a
minor burn so she can be treated
by him in hospital. Meanwhile,
Kirsty isn’t happy about the pregnancy and tells an angry Miles
that she isn’t sure she wants to
keep the baby.
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
TV & Radio
with Jeremy Vine
TV & Radio Editor
What was the last TV programme
The Street. The racist chef episode.
The writing on that series is
unbelievable - even though it’s
made by a different bit of the Beeb
- the acting bit - I feel insanely
proud. Jimmy McGovern is the
writer.Great concept - looking
different story each time.
If you could guest star in any TV
programme, what would it be?
I have small children. I would want
to shock them by popping up during an episode of Peppa Pig. The
one drawback is that I’d have to be
not just turned into a cartoon, but a
piggy cartoon character. Can I
What was your favourite childhood TV programme when you
were growing up?
When I was very small, Tony Hart.
(It reminds me of the great Ali G
question to the Head of Sotheby’s:
‘Is Tony Hart the greatest artist of
all time?’). Then when I got a bit
older, The Men From Uncle.
Which off-air TV programme do
you wish they’d bring back?
It has to be the New Avengers with
Joanna Lumley. I’m sure she’d do
You’re live on a radio request
show. What song do you request
It would have to be ‘Thunder Road’
by Bruce Springsteen. Simply the
greatest rock song ever written,
about anger and escape. The lyrics
are cinematic and the music is like
being hit by lightning.
Listen to Jeremy Vine on BBC Radio 2
(88-91FM) every weekday at 12pm-2pm
COURTESY OF BBC RADIO 2
TV Gold: Bringing back great TV
> This week the nineties classic ‘The Dinosaurs’
Just a Minute!
BBC Radio 4,
The Jeremy Vine Show The Rock ‘n’ Roll Years
BBC Radio 2,
Have you ever tried to talk for a
whole minute about a particular
topic without repeating any one
point? Sounds pretty simple, unless
the subject is something like...buckets, sweating, or an uncomfortable
Just a Minute! is the most random panel game on radio. The latest recording on BBC iPlayer with
Graham Norton must be one of the
more eccentric ones. It’s hilarious
hearing him try and talk about tea
while keeping the sexual references
to a minimum.
Another amusing part of the show
had to be hearing a man that sounds
just like my Grandad talk for what
seemed longer than a minute about
5DWKHU DPXVLQJ DQG GHÀQLWHO\
worth keeping an eye out for. Could
also easily be turned into a great
student drinking game!
The Jeremy Vine show presents an
excellent mix of talk radio and upbeat music.
There are caller discussions about
some of the day’s biggest news
stories. The callers are sometimes
directly involved in the story, but
often they are normal people with
an opinion. Often they have some
very strong and sometimes stupid
opinions, but you never get tired
of listening to the diverse range of
calls which make you laugh, cry,
The discussions are broken up by
music and as always on Radio 2, the
music comes not only from the popular charts but also includes classics
from as far back as the sixties.
If you like The Wright Stuff on
channel Five, then you’ll love The
Jeremy Vine Show.
If you’re interested in classic rock
and want to know how rock music
has evolved over the years, then
check out ‘The Rock n Roll Years’
on Kerrang Radio .
This show focuses on the best tunes
from a different year each day.
From 10am every weekday Stuart Cable takes you on a journey
through the years of rock, enabling
you to discover and learn how rock
has changed over the years.
Guess the year by texting in to
64100 and you could win exclusive
prizes such as album giveaways,
free tickets and exclusive merchandise.
If you’re a regular reader of Kerrang Magazine then why not tune
in to Kerrang Radio on DAB and
online at Kerrang Radio.co.uk.
“Not the mamma...” often blared
out of my television when I was
younger (and older!). Disappointingly, the only way to reconnect with the programme of my
childhood, The Dinosaurs, is via
YouTube - often the case with
legendary children’s programmes
of the nineties.
5DUHO\WRGD\FDQ\RXÀQGTXDOity children’s television that will
entertain the whole family, where
it is acceptable for a baby to be
by their parents, and where charDFWHUVFDQLQÁLFWDEXVHXSRQWKHLU
father with a frying pan.
Children’s TV today is nothing compared to this as it has to
comply with extensive regulations
and must try to enhance children’s development, rather than
providing belly-laugh comedy
like the legendary Dinosaurs!
Dinosaurs could be viewed as
poetry, tackling many key themes
of society in such an amusing way
that you barely realise the serious
Highlights of the show include
Earl attempting to destroy the
plans of an evil orange hippo;
hurling day (the day of a son-inlaws dreams), when Earl awaits
to hurl Ethyl into the tar pits; and
Baby’s own music video, “I’m the
baby and you gotta love me...”.
The Dinosaurs is clearly one of
those golden oldies that would
make a fantastic comeback.
Inside today >>>
The Courier crossword and other puzzles
Puzzles, page 35
Providing you with the soundtrack
to your time at Newcastle University, NSRLive is Newcastle’s only
Student Radio Station.
This year NSR aims to be bigger
than ever, and we hope that you can
help the station to become one of the
strongest in the country.
NSR needs volunteers. Not only for
the obvious roles as presenters, but
also to contribute with reviews, interviews, marketing, and live events
which the station is involved in.
Additionally we are looking to reFUXLWWDOHQWHGLQGLYLGXDOVLQWKHÀHOG
of design. If anyone is interested in
any of these areas please don’t hesitate to contact us!
Today is the day we go live. There
are a variety of shows, with presenters both new and old, to keep you
entertained in between all that hard
work and socialising.
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our more commercial daytime programmes, then from 5 onwards you
can look forward to hearing the specialist DJs in action.
So make sure you log onto our
bright new website and listen to raGLRWKDW·VFDWHUHGVSHFLÀFDOO\IRUWKH
students of Newcastle.
Check out NSR at www.unionsociety.co.uk/nsr/ and look right for
NSR’s weekly schedule.
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Puzzles Editors: Suzi Moore and Ned Walker - [email protected]
1. Type of publication (8)
5. An appointment to see how you have been
getting on with a task or programme (6, 2)
10. Your personal label (4)
11. Not bound by any restrictions (4)
12. Engraved metal circle worn around the neck
that commemorates a heroic act undertaken by
an individual (9)
16. Examination taken in year 12 at school (2)
17. The King of Pop (5)
taking cocaine (5)
21. Key ingredient in Toad in the Hole (7)
42. Indonesian island (4)
44. Process of a political party coming to power
1. People in charge (8)
2. Something that is played (4)
5. Colloquial term for a man (5)
8. Charming, satisfying, nice (8)
14. Type of music composed by 4 down (9)
15. Storage units for novels, plays and poetry (9)
18. Party decoration (7)
26. Bendy (8)
29. Only for a brief time (8)
must contain more than 4 letters and the
letter in the middle. A score of 12 is good,
14 is very good and 16 is excellent. No
plurals or names are allowed.
ODD ONE OUT
same bag as the rest?
Add up the number of steps on each path to
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If you have any ideas about
to us then feel free to email them
to [email protected]
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2GGRQHRXW Cat in the middle of the front
row has red ears
grid so that each column,
each row and each of the
the digits from 1 to 9
check next week’s
edition of The Courier.
THE COURIER 0RQGD\2FWREHU
Royals in the wars
as Met stick boot in
> Page 44, continued page 40
> Season preview page 38
Same game, different world
>Sports Editor Paul
football in Malawi
Mini Buses have no timetable in Malawi. When one’s full, it leaves. This
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the fee (100 kwacha, equivalent to
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change quicker than a bookie. Reggae blasts joyously from the cassette
tiator when they want out.
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that name’s following us both to the
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nerstone of village life in Lilongwe.
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bus journeys home.
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lookout for new volunteers to visit
enthusiasm of others.
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can have a great start to the season
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out in Team Newcastle kit it’s a lot
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ball team. The gaelic team, run by
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am sure that we can have an extremely successful season.
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Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
Football club set
their sights high
TJ. What’s your squad like for
Tom James. All three Men’s
teams were promoted last season,
what’s the aim for 09/10?
TJ. This was the game when the
3rd’s beat the 2nd’s 5-1?
TJ. So do you feel like the 1st’s
have found their level again?
TJ. So do you feel like the freshers have replaced the group of
players you have lost from last
TJ. And you’ve managed to
recruit a couple of Medics this
TJ. The 1st team Captain this
year is George Coyle, how is he to
7-7KHVWDQGRXWÀ[WXUHVDUHREviously the games against NorthXPEULD$UHWKHVHWKHÀ[WXUHV\RX
are most looking forward to?
TJ. How has pre-season gone?
VLRQV0DUN>:[email protected]\H>/[email protected]
TJ. What style of football do you
look to adopt?
TJ. So you’ll be aiming for a winning start on Wednesday?
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
From strength to strength
> Sports Editor Paul Christian talks to Mark
de Lucia about the Sports Volunteer Programme
Two years ago I received an email.
The sender was the exotically
named Marc De Lucia. Before I dismissed it as another bonkers society
hopelessly trying to push cheese
and wine night, something caught
Marc, the University’s Sports Development Manager, advertised the
opportunity to coach in the comPXQLW\0RUHVSHFLÀFDOO\WRFRDFK
football. It was called the Second
Chance Programme, offering local
youths and adults an escape from
their troubled pasts through the
blissful medium of kicking a ball.
Keen to give something back, I
put my name down. The free kit
had nothing to do with it. A week
later, on a typically blustery day,
I threw my coaching experience
(none) against the wind. I was
instantly hooked. Despite a humble
team of three student coaches,
Marc’s ambition was big from day
one; surpassed only by his dedication. The future looked bright.
Two years on, the present is
bright. Blinding in fact. The Second
Chance Programme (recently
renamed Street League) continues
to shine, but now comes under
the umbrella of Sports University
North East England (SUNEE), a
scheme instrumental in Newcastle’s
own Sports Volunteer Programme.
As I sit down to talk to Marc, his
passion for the development is no
less engaging. “The programme in
its new format is now into the second year. We’re bigger and better,
and offer coaching opportunities in
a range of sports, rather than just
one or two.”
The Sports Volunteer Programme
was created in September 2008.
Overseen by SUNEE, it has expanded student coaching by creating links with local schools, clubs,
charities and various community
groups. The idea is for students, regardless of their previous coaching
experience, to actively encourage
participation at any level.
As Sports Development Manager
his job encompasses a lot: managing current sources of funding,
seeking new ones; supervising the
Sports Volunteer Programme and
constantly striving to improve budding community projects. “It’s all
about looking for new groups and
organisations to work with,” he
At present, the volunteer programme is funded from four different streams. The most prominent
is the Higher Education Funding
Council for England (HEFCE) who
have distributed almost one million
pounds over three years across all
as well as providing a member of
staff in each (Sarah Todd in Newcastle).
More funding has been sought
from the likes of the Northern Rock
Foundation, the Football Foundation and the Catherine Cookson
Foundation. By interacting with
these bodies, Marc has paved the
way for the expansion of the programme- particularly in schools.
Last year volunteers regularly
coached rugby league, badminton,
netball and trampolining in eight
schools throughout the North East.
From football to fencing, the programme prides itself on inclusivity; is driven by the enthusiasm of
It’s rewarding too. “It enriches
your student experience; gives you
the chance to put something back
into the environment you have
lived and studied in,” says Marc.
He has a point. One of the hidden beauties of volunteering is the
chemistry struck up with fellow
volunteers, the satisfaction of collectively making a difference.
As well as working with schools,
the volunteer programme promotes
community engagement. This
involves linking up with hard to
reach groups such as those with
backgrounds of drug abuse, the
homeless and asylum seekers.
Here, the programme really
comes into its own, giving students
a taste of life’s harsher realities,
and showing how sport softens
them. Coaching your peers can be
“It can be quite daunting at the
start” Marc says through a wry
smile. “But students can take
comfort in the fact that everyone’s
in the same boat. Liaising with
specialist coaches helps them feel at
The programme has teamed up
with other charities to offer specialist development programmes
across various activities. The
Princes Trust is a case in point. A
charity dedicated to youth development, the University provided the
last year including fencing and
Students also have the option of
developing their own professional
coaching future. A top perk of the
programme is the opportunity
of charge. Of the one hundred
students present on the database
in 2008, thirty two either were or
is a fantastic opening to progress
up the coaching ladder.
This year, the database has
clocked ninety one sign-ups
already. A stark contrast to that
windy afternoon two years ago. No
more endearing though.
Free sports clothing is still provided as it was then, travel still
reimbursed. There’s a free CRB
check. Coaching still enhances
still develops team work. Clichéd
phrases we’ve heard before.
Still vital nonetheless, especially
in relation to the buzzword of our
that in the present working climate,
getting involved in something like
the Student Volunteer Programme
can only improve your employment credentials.” It sets you apart
from the crowd; adds substance to
your CV. It’s things like this that
Not everyone interested in sport
enjoys coaching, and it would be
naive to think it is the sole proprietor of development. The scope of
the programme covers other areas
such as marketing, mentoring, adPLQLVWUDWLRQHYHQRIÀFLDWLQJ
Marc feels these are overlooked.
“Clubs are always on the lookout
for admin staff to help with the
workload. Moreover, some people
don’t realise that in order to increase activity for events like Sport
Relief, we have to actually promote
and market them.”
The Podium Project last year, in
which students planned and delivered a sporting event interactively
at Walbottle Technology College,
is an example of how involvement
Feedback has always been
positive from past participants.
The programme is accessible and
doesn’t eat into class time, which
further taps into the student
psyche. Last year’s head student
coach Sarah McChesney claimed it
was the highlight of her three year
degree. And it was the fabric of my
last two summers- both of which
were spent coaching in foreign
As our conversation draws to a
close, Marc looks to the future. He
speaks of increasing awareness
of sporting events such as Sport
Relief. He speaks of involving
students through scholarships; of
working with more schools, more
groups; more communities.
more the more I do it.” Unassuming as ever. The dark evenings
may be closing in; the future’s still
bright for the Student Volunteer
Garnett 5 Lokomotiv 2; Dyslexic
Untied.2 Barca-Law-Na 1; Castle
Leazes 4 Hurricanes 3.
Real Mechanical 6 Sex Panthers
Athletic 2; Crayola 1; Henderson Hall
‘A’ 2; Gashletico 0 Ecosoccer 0.
FC Bappage 4 Inter City 2; AFC
Hydro 2 Aftermath 3
Tub Boys 0 R U Shaving A Laugh 3;
Breast Rummage Albion 2 Roman
Engines 0 Agrics 46; Cheeky Ladies
61 Agrics 2nds 3; Armstrong 16
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
Injury-hit Royals go down at Cochrane
> Fitness worries
Continued from back page
Productive kicking from scrumhalf Nick Dempsey ensured Leeds
Met repeatedly found themselves
penned into their own 22.
On 50 minutes however the Royals lost concentration and found
their defence stretched by a number
of penetrating Leeds Met moves
adding a penalty to his side’s points
total, leaving the hosts trailing 8-6.
Despite the score-line showing
a narrow Leeds Met advantage
Newcastle were certainly edging
proceedings and they continued to
test the visitor’s defence throughout
the early parts of the second period,
with a combination of quick breaks
running from the pack.
however, Newcastle struggled to
turn their temporary dominance
into points and once again found
themselves under intense Leeds
Met pressure. Newcastle struggled
WRKDQGOHWKHLQFUHDVLQJO\LQÁXHQtial Leeds forward pack, while the
much time on the ball and was cre-
ating all the plat for his back line.
The Royals’ defence was continually stretched for the next 10
minutes but the Royals showed
great unity and courage in resisting
the Leeds Met onslaught. Indeed,
the visitors’ frustration boiled over
mid-way into the second half, with
a number of violent altercations
stopping the game, displaying the
intensity and passion of both teams.
The home fans were once again
given a reason for optimism with
only 15 minutes remaining after
centre Patrick Irwin again dissected
the Leeds Met defence with a well
to the referee being forced to award
the Royals a penalty straight in
front of the posts.
Reliable kicker Adam Armstrong
hosts into a deserved 9-8 lead, and
set Newcastle up for an opening
However, echoing last year’s inability to close out games, the Royals’ ‘best laid plans’ were cruelly
undone four minutes from time.
of a ruck, the referee’s diagonally
worst, and allowed the Leeds Met
late penalty and condemn the Royals to a grossly unfortunate opening
It was a cruel end to the game for
the Royals as they had spent much
of the second half playing with only
four hospitalisations, forced them
to play with a man down.
Most worrying for the 1st team is
lin who broke his ankle in two
Tom Rainey said after the match
that ‘it is a pretty devastating way
to lose but all in all there is a much
better feel about the team this year
and our performance certainly
deserved a better result.’
Next week sees the Royals visit
Loughborough which will be a
massive test but also represents a
massive opportunity for them to
prove themselves as genuine challengers in this division.
Poly well beaten as Newcastle warm-up with win
Men’s Hockey 1sts
Northumbria University failed to
avenge their 4-3 defeat at the hands
and re-energised Royals side at
that the game was not going to be
one for the purists, with numerous
errors on show from both sides. But
ten minutes in with neither team
controlling the game the away side
pounced on an error to win and
then clinically convert a penalty
corner to put them in front.
To the annoyance of the gathering
crowd the goal didn’t settle either
side down, with the game being
dominated by misplaced passes
and poor control on both sides of
the halfway line. When the Royals got the ball under control they
looked by far the better side, but
extended periods of possession
were few and far between.
However, towards the end of the
half both sides looked dangerous
on the break and it was Newcastle
who nearly took advantage of this
Northumbria defence napping,
aerial pass to Rollo Lewis, who
struck a vicious reverse shot onto
the helmet of the surprised goalNHHSHUZKRLQDGYHUWHQWO\GHÁHFWHG
it to safety, keeping his side in front
After the break the Royals looked
far more settled on the ball, with
forwards Ollie Fraser and Paul
Hardiman making good runs
round the back of the Northumbria defence. And it was Fraser
who equalised 10 minutes into the
second half from a penalty corner,
nipping in front of his captain Ian
Rossiter to claim the glory.
From then on the home side were
almost constantly camped in the
Northumbria half, with the away
side only able to relieve the pressure with long, hopeful balls to the
With ten minutes to go the pressure told as man of the match Mike
Sedcole showed great skill to keep
the ball on the end of his stick
whilst dribbling across the top of
the ‘D’ before striking the ball at
goal and watching as it hit both
posts before nestling in the back of
The Royals almost had a third
soon after when newly promoted
George Heaton-Renshaw rounded
two defenders and the keeper only
to see his shot bounce back agonisingly off the far post. However, the
home side did not wait long for
from time Sedcole piped up with
his second from a deceptive penalty
At 3-1 up the home side looked
very comfortable and kept the ball
came to signal the end of the game
and a win for Newcastle.
Every victory against the rivals is
one to savour, but with harder opponents in the shape of Manchester
Royals will be working hard in
training to iron out their game.
Armstrong take spoils in heated Intra Mural opener
IM Rugby Union
On a breezy yet sunny Wednesday
afternoon at Heaton Sports ground,
Mural rugby union game ended in
This was a game for last season’s
players to get back into the swing
of things, but also to showcase
some new rugby protégées. As both
teams warmed up there already
seemed to be good team spirit in
and in less than a minute Armstrong were already ahead, thanks
to Samler converting an early
Larrikins hit back with a promising run made by the full-back but it
led to nothing.
Five minutes later Samler converted another penalty to make it
6-0 as Armstrong seemed to be doing most of the attacking. Larrikins
going on a darting run before being
From the following scrum the
ball was passed towards the centre
between the posts and score the
The Larrikins full-back then followed up with a simple conversion,
and the game was on.
Two minutes later and Larrikins
made a substitute - with Taylor
coming on - only to be awarded the
the outrage of some Larrikins fans,
for rising during the scrum.
Armstrong kept pressing and it
eventually paid off, with Richardson scoring a try with the last move
of the half.
started, with Samler converting,
making it 13-7 at half-time.
The second half started slower
inside the opposition’s half - only
for it to sail wide.
Five minutes later Samler hit
blowing their chance to further
increase the lead.
Halfway through the second
half Armstrong were awarded yet
another penalty, and with the wind
on his side Samler scored this time
giving them a nine point lead.
Larrikins pressed and came close
with one lineout near the try line,
but it was to no avail.
Frustration could be seen near the
with the whistle going a minute
McLean, who was watching from
the sideline, was clearly delighted
with the win.
“The performance was absolutely
brilliant. We turned up today and
have got a good team here”.
“Jack Mayhew was superb today.
He’s a new lad and his personal
performance was fantastic.”
Larrikins on the other hand will
need to ensure they are more disciplined in the next game, as that
proved their downfall today.
Monday 12 October 2009 THE COURIER
Intra Mural Football
Five star Garnett sink Lokomotiv
IM Football Division One
Garnett’s opener against Lokomotiv
had all the ingredients of the archetypal Intra Mural tie. Eight goals
for a start, four different coloured
shirts, and twenty-two giddy students chasing a wind-swept ball.
It’s what Wednesday afternoons
are made of. That said, quality
wasn’t lost on either team and both
showed title-contending form in
Garnett started slow and were 2-0
down within ten minutes following
an impressive brace from Lokomotiv’s Stee Mclovin. With a few new
faces, and a host of IM veterans, last
\HDU·V FKDPSLRQV VWUXJJOHG WR ÀQG
their shape early on. They were duly
First a mix up at the back allowed
the pacy number ten to race through
the defence before slotting home.
Five minutes later Mclovin added a
second with his head, following a
neat cross from notable captain Dan
Parkinson. Lokomotiv were buoyant; Garnett clueless.
%XW IRRWEDOO·V D JDPH RI FRQÀdence, and Garnett’s grew as the
game progressed. Rob Pearson began to stabilise the defence and the
PLGÀHOG ÀQDOO\ ZRNH XS $ SHULRG
of sustained pressure from Garnett
forced their opener when Morrant
minutes later Fairmichael headed
the equaliser from a tantalising corner. Game on.
The comeback was complete before half-time when Morrant broke
with a delightful lob. Garnett, not
IRU WKH ÀUVW WLPH LQ WKHLU KLVWRU\
were doing it the hard way.
The second half was subdued but
Garnett were unrelenting in their
Kilvington continued to deliver
like a postman; Craig was industrious up front. His industry paid off
and it was 4-2 within 20 minutes of
Lokomotiv dug for inspiration and
Parkinson led the way. But it was
clear something was missing. Did
Garnett were happy to sit and
soak in the pressure, hitting on the
break. It worked a treat and 20 minutes from time it was 5-2. Substitute
7KHR $GMHWH\ WRRN DGYDQWDJH RI
some slack defending and breezed
through to clinch the win. His celebration was modest; his speed explosive.
Mclovin completed his hat trick to
give Lokomotiv a glimmer of hope.
pions Garnett ensured a successful
start to the season. Lokomotiv could
only put it down to a Superbad day
Matthews brace sees off Lawyers in opener
IM Football Division One
was not enough to earn his team
the victory today as they lost 2-1 to
a resilient Dyslexic side at Longbenton.
Dyslexics went in at half-time
2-0 up courtesy of two goals from
self-proclaimed ‘tenacious striker’
late Barca surge to come away with
all three points.
Both teams lined up in very
continental/Football Manageresque 4-3-2-1 formations and it
seemed that players on both sides
weren’t too clear what their roles
transpired. The breakthrough for
Dyslexic came after Barca lost the
ball cheaply on the left. Lawrence
Jackson took full advantage by supplying a neat cross into Matthews
who tucked the ball past the keeper
from six yards.
Moss had a good chance to level
for Barca but only managed to lift
his shot over the onrushing keeper
and the crossbar. Both teams continued to create chances with JackVRQFXUOLQJDVKRWMXVWSDVWWKHSRVW
for Dyslexic and Barca’s Harbison
two men on the edge of the area.
Dyslexic’s second goal came when
the ball fell kindly to Matthews in
the six yard box and he made no
net for the second time. Harbison,
starting to prove a handful for the
Dyslexic defence, replied in vain
with a strike from 20 yards. Halftime arrived with the scoreline a
Despite moments of quality
neither side looked too comfortable playing 4-3-2-1. Not long into
the second half Barca realised it
wasn’t working and changed to a
more traditional 4-4-2 in search of a
Play, however, was disrupted
by a bizarre moment involving
a player changing his undergarments. Determined not to be
caught off guard he showed great
control dealing with a long goalkick, whilst topless, only for the referee to stop play for what I can only
imagine was indecent exposure...
Dyslexic rarely troubled the Barca
sure came from Barca. Moss and
Harbison in particular were causing
Then came Moss’s moment of
Dyslexics’ centre halves he nonchalantly lobbed the keeper from the
edge of the area. Despite a hand-
ful of other chances that followed
Barca failed to get the vital second
goal that would’ve earned them a
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
All the photos from Wednesday’s games www.thecourieronline.co.uk >>>
Intra Mural Football
early season storm
IM Football Division One
Castle Leazes got off to a winning
start on Wednesday against The
Hurricanes after coming back from
were scrappy with only one real
chance for Castle Leazes created by
a diagonal ball across the defence
meeting the foot of Jack ‘Crouchy’
created their second opportunity
rebound was scuffed by ‘Crouchy’
This miss created a counter-attack
for The Hurricanes who broke
Castle Leazes hand and a penalty
It was only three minutes later
when The Hurricanes’ Rory Mc'RQDOGVPDVKHGWKHEDOOIURP
The two goals seemed to settle
the rebound left Leazes still goalOHVV
Castle Leazes continued to chase
the pressure on The Hurricanes’
looked a lot more clinical in front of
goal and were able to secure their
third on the stroke of half-time with
Aaron Richie delicately chipping
get a soft hand to the ball before it
The second half saw a completely
different Leazes team emerge with
Joseph Arthur found the top corner
After the match he was quick to
quash rumours that the goal was
Castle Leazes’ front pairing of
Colin Manley and Jack Mellor grew
stronger throughout the game with
footed both of The Hurricanes’
central-defenders before placing a
IM Football Division Two
Sex Panthers Athletic
An accomplished second half
The match began as a scrappy
Indeed he was at the heart of the
SOD\HGGRZQWKHULJKWZLQJOHDYing Real striker Phil Morton with a
The referee continued to dominate proceedings with neither side
grasping the concept of taking a
The ballet-like one-legged throwins of either side were frowned
confusion in the Blues’ defence and
poor clearance by the Real defence was pounced upon by Nick
Neither side managed to dominate but Morton had a good chance
good work from Neil Carey alORZHGKLVFDSWDLQ+XJR%URZQWR
The introduction of Henry Morley
in central defence for Mechanical
made them look far more assured
well by the Panthers’ keeper and
some good work from Carey
ball found its way into the adjacent
followed and neither side could
Real Mechanical set their stall out
Carey twice played great throughballs only to see his team-mates
curling free-kick from skipper
for the Blues and Carey had a shot
tipped wide before another good
forward allowed strike-partner
Morton to double his tally and
Real continued to pepper the
Panthers’ goal with Brown shooting
Neil Carey then grabbed a wellGHVHUYHGJRDOWRPDNHLWEHIRUH
being substituted to loud applause
Athletic searched for a late
captain to bemoan the ‘brief lapse
of concentration at the start of the
Meanwhile Real skipper Hugo
performance as ‘the best we could
THE COURIER Monday 12 October 2009
Hurricanes stunned by
> Intra Mural Football, page 42-43
Sports Editors: Paul Christian, Jamie Gavin and Tom James - [email protected]
Met heartbreak for wounded Royals
Men’s Rugby Union 1sts
at Cochrane Park
There was a sense of injustice around
a blustery Cochrane Park last week,
as Newcastle were narrowly beaten
on the opening day of the season.
Despite appearing to edge a tight
affair, a late Leeds Met penalty
meant it was the visitors who came
out victorious, condemning the
hosts to a desperately disappointing
The Royals were desperate to get
off to a winning start in the BUCS
Premier Men’s North A division, but
were left wondering ‘what might
have been’ in the season opener, after lady luck perched on the side of
The ‘early season syndrome’ appeared evident immediately, as the
ball was spilled forward from the
kick-off, resulting in an early scrum
for the visitors. The opening ten
minutes followed a similar trend,
with both sides struggling to cut out
handling errors, made admittedly
worse by the swirling wind across
After a cautious opening the
game exploded into life after 15
minutes, with the Royals denying
Leeds the opening points by holding up the ball behind the try-line.
This appeared to inspire the hosts,
as Newcastle subsequently opened
the scoring and their point tally for
the season after a successful penalty
converted by winger Adam Armstrong on 25 minutes.
castle appeared to have the edge
over their league counterparts and
rightly had the spectators dreaming
of the new season. This optimism
however was short-lived; with the
Leeds outside centre beating two
defenders and scoring the opening
With the windy conditions proving a tough test of the kicker’s credentials, the Leeds stand-off could
not add the conversion, and the
Royals once again found themselves
dictating the pace of play before
After impressive breaks from the
centre partnership of Gavin Hadley and Patrick Irwin, the visitors
were forced to concede another
penalty outside their own 22, with
Armstrong successfully sending the
hosts into half-time holding a narrow one point advantage.
Newcastle started the second period in an identical manner to the
in attack, commitment in defence,
and the forwards consistently supplying their back-line with quicklyrecycled balls.
Continued on page 40