kick tease the boston t-bag party meatballs

A lot of times people look at the
negative side of what they feel
they can’t do. I always look on the
positive side of what I can do.
-Chuck Norris
So I was sitting down with a very intelligent and beautiful woman the other night, and we were discussing sports
psychology and the effect of negative thoughts and self-talk on and off of the field. I felt so inspired by the conversation I decided to include the study in this week’s GMOT. Not only can this be used in kickball, but also in everyday
life. By telling ourselves that we can’t do something we automatically start putting up walls for our self-conscious to
hurdle over. And those mental hurdles effect us physically as well because, it is believed, that the mind is connected
to the body. By conditioning ourselves to avoid getting into these “funks” or once we realize we are in one, we can
find a way out and resolve these issues of having a bad game/experience. So let’s say that saying things like “I am
not going to make this catch” or “I can’t even kick this ball” are attributed to the self conditioning you have set by
yourself from previous experiences, either as a defense mechanism or a way of coping with past failures. These coping patterns have been associated to people who have addictive habits like smoking or drinking. So in theory this
negative thought process can be considered a bad habit. Now comes the tricky part of getting yourself out of this
funk by getting your mind back on the game and off of the whole self-blame band wagon.
First, we have to have a way of tracking the amount of negative thoughts that occur in one game. The system we
discussed, although it referred to golfing, was to keep paper clips in one pocket, and for every negative self-talk,
transfer a clip from one pocket to the other. Now, this is all fine and dandy if you actually have pockets, but most of
us are wearing soccer shorts with none. Try and think of something you could use to keep track; for instance, I keep
a clipboard with my team’s roster. There is some unused space that can be used to keep a tally.
Second is to find a trigger – something physical you do to get your mind off of the emotion and back on track. I was
given a few, like tapping of the leg, stomping your foot or scratching your head, but the one that stood out to me
was the idea of wearing a rubber band on your wrist. Every time I would have one of these negative moments, I
would snap the rubber band, take a step back, breathe and think of something to counteract that negative thought.
Lastly, one could combine the counting and trigger techniques, but this time only count the negative self-talk moments that you do not used the trigger for. Count the instances and keep a record over the course of a month or so.
Eventually you will see a decrease in negative thoughts, and your new optimism will increase the amount of fun you
are having and also might make you a better player. Because as you all should remember, the main goal of WAKA is
for people to be having a good time. Keep in mind that this is a social league before it is a sports one.
So these are the things that Brian writes when he has been sober for three weeks. And you thought I was going to
write about Boca players chasing women, random acts of mockery, or the second coolest division in WAKA, FL-West
Palm. Before you go blaming yourself for jumping to conclusions, snap your rubber band, breathe, and think to
yourself: “It’s only Brian having a moment of clarity.”
4
Greetings fellow kickballers! I do hope that you are enjoying your Spring 2010
season so far! I’d like to thank all of the teams who submitted recaps this week –
you’re fabulous! And for those teams that didn’t…well, enjoy the pics.
This week I have the pleasure of not only reporting to you all about the lovely
GMOT, but also on our redemption standings and charity.
First off, redemption. Here are the scores for Week 1:
Wyld Stallyons - 4 Mind The Stepchildren - 1
NADS - 4 Feet’s o’ Fusion - 1
Boston T-Bag Party - Win Kick Tease - Forfeit
Meatballs - 4 Incrediballs - 1
DDTP - 4
Wingmen & The Hot Wings - 1
Go Ugly Early - 4
Florida First Pumpers – 1
To the winners, congratulations. To the losers…well, there’s always next week!
Which brings me to my next item on the agenda… Can’t get enough flip cup?
Well neither can we, and for the rest of the season we’ll be conducting a weekly
Survivor Flip Cup Tournament. It’s a $5 buy-in with half the pot to the winner,
and half to our charity, the Shaun Foley Foundation. SFC will take place after
redemption each week.
And speaking of charity…
A big thank you to all of the teams that purchased bracelets:
Boston T-Bag Party – 18
Wingmen & The Hot Wings – 15
Florida Fist Pumpers – 15
Go Ugly Early – 15
MEATBALLS – 15
Feets O’ Fusion – 11
Mind the Stepchildren – 8
NADS – 6
Kick Tease – 6
Incrediballs – 4
DTTP – 4
Wyld Stallyons – 4
A special shout out goes to Todd Kough of FFP for purchasing 12 bracelets…
you’re awesome! So far we’ve raised $523 for our charity from flip cup and
bracelet proceeds. Let’s keep at it, folks!
To all my writers and to those submitting game recaps, please be sure to send
those in to me each week by Monday by e-mailing [email protected].
And be sure to sign up for the official GMOT Facebook group at
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=127859173454
5
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Well GMOTherf---ers, it seems like Game 1 didn’t go as expected for many of us. I mean really, who expected THREE mercy rulings to take place? I definitely did not, but
did expect ONE. You see, it all started between the Boca Board over a week ago when Ratman wanted to bet Sean a bucket that DTTP would beat the Wingmen in Game
1, but Sean didn’t go for it. However, I immediately saw a chance to ruffle Sean’s feathers and asked if anyone wanted to bet a bucket on a mercy ruling. Within minutes,
Jason accepted my bet, hoping to get back some of the beers I’ve swiped from him over the past four seasons. He thought it was a sure bet, as DTTP is known more for its
defense than its offense. I honestly wasn’t sure it could happen… until I witnessed DTTP score 10 runs by the second inning. They went on to win 13-1. Unfortunately, I
still owed Ratman two buckets from some bets we made during the Preseason party’s survivor flip cup (SFC) tournament, so I immediately handed him my prize. Now I just
need to stall him long enough to win another bucket from someone. Lucky for me, Sir Robin is away on business this week.
About the SFC bet… I was watching the tournament when I realized that there were exactly two T-Bags and two Drinkers remaining among a few others. I was pretty
confident that Ricky and Brielle could outlast Cory and Tara, so I bet Ratman a bucket that one of his Drinkers would be eliminated before one of my T-Bags. However, it
wasn’t meant to be, as Brielle was eventually knocked out of the competition. I then bet him that Ricky could outlast Cory and Tara, so he said we could go double or
nothing. Tara was the next one sent packing, leaving just Ricky and Cory. I don’t remember what happened next, but I do remember Ricky costing me my second bucket.
SFC returns to CJ’s this Friday night after Redemption. It’s $5 to enter, but 1/2 the pot will go to the winner and the other 1/2 will go to the Shaun Foley Foundation.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Week One’s theme was “WAcKy hAts” and there were some pretty damn wacky hats around the field and bar… everything from bunny ears to
Gilligan to a Viking (with a T-Bag earring). Actually, that Viking was none other than Flava Flav, as played by Richie of the Wingmen. He went on
to win for best male, but a close second was Boca’s favorite drama queen, AJ from Go Ugly Early.
The best female prize went to Jessica from the Meatballs, who rocked a tail with her Tigger hat. Ok seriously, Kimbourine, I’m gonna need more
butt shots (of the hoes) this week. Oh, and cleavage… lots of cleavage. Thanks!
That reminds me, this week’s theme is “Hoe-Down,” where the farmers and hoes come out to play. I’m praying now that we don’t see any dudes
in daisy dukes this season. (You know who you are.)
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The Vice (Jamie, not Sean) made a rare appearance at my North Miami team’s practice last Thursday and as always, he did not disappoint. He showed Los T-Bags how to
catch a ball in right field with a beer and cigarette in hand. Classic Vice. Sadly, my long time friend lost his dad after last season, but will be making his long awaited return
to Boca this Summer.
With one founding father of The Boston T-Bag Party coming back, the other might be leaving… ME. That’s right, after four seasons in a place I’ve come to call home (even
though it’s about an hour away from where I actually live), I may not be able to play in Boca next season with the team I worked so hard to build and party with all the great
friends I’ve made in the last two years. I’ve been summoned by the Kickball Gods to serve a higher purpose by being awarded the pending Friday night WAKA FL-Pines
Division in Pembroke Pines starting in mid-June (if I can lock down Brian Piccolo Park). Boca doesn’t start up again until late July, so if both divisions start on schedule, I
might still join Boca a few games into the season. Isn’t it crazy how life can hand you a royal flush and pocket deuces at the same time?
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Those of you who stayed out of the cold last Friday night saw Stereoburn rock CJ’s with some of my favorite 90s rock songs. Don’t ask me what they were, ‘cause I don’t
remember, but I can tell you that Chris from Go Ugly Early is their drummer. You can catch Stereoburn at random bars around Boca and Delray, but I’m not allowed to
promote those bars, so go find the band on Facebook or something.
Are you ready to rock the mic yourself this week? I sure as hell am and can’t wait for Friday night, as CJ’s is giving us back karaoke for the rest of the season. I actually
rocked the mic with a live band for the first time at a bar in Hollywood last week and it was AWESOME. They had a screen on-stage and one within view of the stage, so it
was still karaoke… but with a live band. I got to rock out “Wonderwall” and oddly enough, I was getting all kinds of high fives from strangers after my performance. Either
they were too drunk to care what I sounded like, or they were thanking me for getting off the stage. Regardless (Sean), I’m so taking back “Wonderwall” this week.
Show your support for the Boca GMOT by becoming a true GMOTherf---er today: http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/group.php?gid=127859173454.
““T
T--B
BA
AG
GS
SO
ON
NY
YO
OF
FA
AA
AA
AA
AC
CE
E!!””
6
# 1: MEATBALLS
No change at the top here. The MEATBALLS started off the season
with a 12-0 mercy rule of the newbie team Incrediballs. Although
the yellow team threatened to score by loading the bases, they
never quite got there. Next week will be the first real test for this
seasoned team, as they take on the now #4 ranked NADS.
# 2: DTTP
Although giving up one run in their opener, Drink Till They’re Pretty
remains, holding their position of the number two overall team in
Boca. They coasted through their first game against the Wingmen,
with all 17 of their players getting at least one hit. DTTP is solid top
to bottom this season, but like the MEATBALLS, their first real test
comes in week two against #3 Kick Tease.
#3: Kick Tease
Kick Tease easily handled the Boston T-Bag Party 10-2, solidifying
their spot at #3 overall. But their schedule gets very dicey from
here on out, as they face all of the top clubs in Boca over the next
five weeks. A win next week would certainly move this club to the
second overall spot. Will their fifth matchup against DTTP finally
bear fruit?
#4: NADS
The NADS took care of Feets O’ Fusion in a 3-0 shutout to move
up to #4 this week. All of their runs came in the first inning, and
their defense held strong the rest of the game. They better savor
that win, however, as the NADS now have the misfortune of facing
the league’s powerhouse in week two. Can this team take the #1
overall spot away from the MEATBALLS? Unlikely.
#5: Florida Fist Pumpers
This new Boca team sure didn’t look new in its 12-0 mercy ruling
of Go Ugly Early. Sure, they beat the #12 overall team, but after
one game, they certainly earned this spot. We will learn a lot about
this freshman club next week as they take on Feets O’ Fusion,
who will be very hungry for a win after a defensive struggle vs.
the NADS.
#6: Wyld Stallyons
Here we find another newcomer team quickly moving up the Boca
standings. They took care of Mind the Stepchildren, my pre-season
pick for #6. Their 7-5 victory over a team who has several longtime
kickball players bodes well for this group of former college athletes.
Although keep in mind, they can fall back in these rankings real
fast if they drop next week’s game to the T-Bags.
#7: Feets O’ Fusion
Of all the 0-1 teams, FOF is clearly the most solid. A 3-0 loss to
the NADS is not a bad result by any measure. They have a great
opportunity to put their first “W” on the board in a game against
the Fist Pumpers.
#8: The Boston T-Bag Party
The T-Bags were quite unhappy with my 8th place pre-season
ranking. They might be even more upset to know they didn’t move
up this week. Granted, they played a very tough opponent in their
first game, but a win over the Stallyons in week two will scoot this
club up at least one spot in the rankings.
#9: Mind the Stepchildren
This club drops three spots after a tough loss against the Wlyd
Stallyons. They won’t have to wait long to taste victory, as they
face off with the #11 Incrediballs in week two. Look for a solid
victory in this game to move them up the ladder in the rankings.
#10: Wingmen and the Hot Wings
The Wingmen had a rough first game against one of Boca’s
strongest teams, but they were leading that game 1-0. Sure, the
end result of 15-1 was the heaviest beating of any team all night,
but that one run keeps them ahead of the next two teams who are
battling it out for the coveted position in the depths of basement.
#11: Incrediballs
This new team’s week one matchup was the ultimate mismatch, to
be sure. No team enjoys being mercy ruled without even scoring,
but it took the MEATBALLS more than one inning to do it, which is
why, for now, they are not in last place. This loss is not a measure
of this team’s abilities, however. We will know more after their
matchup with Mind the Stepchildren in week two.
#12 Go Ugly Early
What can I say here? How can anyone predict a 12-0 mercy rule
by a brand new team? They can’t, unless they are playing Go
Ugly Early. It will take a miracle for this team to climb out of last
place overall in the standings, as they may really Go Ugly Early by
dropping all seven of its contests. This team will likely continue to
falter on the field throughout the season, but they will be having
the most fun at the bar.
7
WELCOME FLORIDA FIST PUMPERS!
Sadly being quite distraught over our big loss
against DTTP, I not only forgot my sheets of paper
but also a pen, so I have to muster up a foggy
recollection of my interview with the three leftover
Florida Fist Pumpers. The group was formed
similar to the Wyld Stallyons in that they all work
together, and were looking for a place to run around
and drink (You found the right organization!).
These three in particular were pretty big UF Gator fans, so I do remember all their responses being either
Gator or drinking oriented, the latter being great kickball responses. Coming off their first win, a one
inning mercy rule against the Pinkies, this team was incredibly cocky. They are sure they are going to end
the season at 5-2. With teams like Kick Tease, Feets O’ Fusion, and of course the hungry Wingmen &
The Hot Wings, this may be a tough feat to accomplish, but with some big upsets they may take the title
as Ultimate Rookie Team.
After some college football shit talking and some chomping arm movements, we got the interview back
on track. Surprise, surprise they said they donned the orange shirts to support their Alma Mater, and
because the coveted Wingmen Blue is owned by yours truly. When asked why their team is the Florida
Fist Pumpers, they responded because WAKA wouldn’t let them use Phucket. Although they are very
confident in their teams skills, they did say that their main focus was on drinking, meeting new friends
and having a good time.
Ratman has ranked the Florida Fist Pumpers at #5, but it’s only Week 1, and with many more weeks of
kickball to play, only time will tell if these rookies are really “The Team To Beat.” It was good to chat with
you Fist Pumpers; I’ll be rooting for you this season, except in Week 6.
This week I will be scouting the bar for the superhero group, Incrediballs, and although
I can’t promise I will be sober, I will try to have a pen and paper.
8
Two things became pretty evident to me last week. First, wet kickball + bright lights + alcohol = mercy rule.
Second, practicing in the off-season is as effective as a torn condom. But then again there are always
those teams “on the pill” who actually do get better. My team just happens not to be one of those, and if
kickball games were sex then we’d have seven children by the end of the season. This isn’t the place for
such discussions, though. I’ll leave that to the recappers. Further, I’d like to apologize if this article offends
anyone’s tender sensibilities. I’ve eaten Taco Bell for four straight days and I’m succumbing to the beginning
stages of Taco Madness, a.k.a. rabies. I also may have been raped by a burrito on Wednesday, but that’s
a different story.
So last week at the bar was pretty cool. I was really happy to see the turnout, and I finally got to see some
much anticipated redemption games go down. As you will probably read in the redemption article, most of
the games were blow-outs, but hey, that’s why we call it redemption. Unless of course you lost on and off the
field, in which case for you it was more like damnation. If that was you last week, though, just think about this:
at least it can’t get any worse, right?
We also got the pleasure of being entertained by Stereoburn. They are a great band, and you guys should
definitely show your support as their drummer is a fellow kickballer and teammate of mine. Starting this week,
however, we have the return of karaoke, so everyone start getting ready to belt out some of your favorite
jams. That brings us to the point of this week’s article:
Top 5 Things Not To Do While Singing Karaoke
5. Sing a song you don’t know the words to. (You know who you are, and it’s just as ugly for the rest of us to
listen to as it is for you to try and sing it.)
4. Sing a song meant to be sung by the opposite gender. (There are certainly exceptions to this rule, but you
won’t catch me singing any Mariah Carey, and no ladies should be singing any Isaac Hayes.)
3. Sing a song longer than five minutes. (Sure, I love the song “American Pie” by Don McLean, but if I’m
up there singing for eight minutes I give you permission to boo me off the stage. Always keep your fellow
kickballers in mind. J)
2. Try to sing when you can barely stand. (Pretty much speaks for itself.)
1. Pretend that you are Steve Perry. (Everyone loves Journey, but let’s keep it real people, at least be
prepared to laugh at yourself afterward.)
9
With the first week of Boca Kickball in the books, I was drawn to the old proverb to preview the dishing out of this week’s awards: “The more things seem to change, the more they just stay the same.”
With that said, I would like to present to you the award winners (and losers) for week one:
ON THE FIELD
Bonehead Player of the Week
I’m going to go ahead and give this first award to me, because hey, there’s nothing like a little selfdeprecation to start off the season. On the verge of mercy ruling the Wingman, I took away Zack’s
opportunity to end the game with a grand slam. When I rounded third on an easy bunt to their catcher which would have loaded the bases for our cleanup kicker, I got (Robin of) Cocky and tried to bait
a throw so I could score right there. Little did I know my agility is not what it used to be. I proceeded
to slip and fall on my ass, and was easily pegged out to end the inning. Zack thanked me though, as
my bonehead play allowed him to kick a solo homer to lead off the next inning.
Badass Team of the Week
This one goes to the entire team known as the Florida Fist Pumpers. Having placed them tied for last
in the pre-season rankings was clearly a mistake, as they mercy ruled the Kilted team in one inning!
I wasn’t actually able to watch this game as it was happening during ours, but from what I hear it
was FFP domination all the way. I’m not so sure how “new” this new team actually is, but regardless,
they all deserve credit for collectively putting the smack down to make sure everyone on Jason’s
team went Ugly Early.
AT THE BAR
Excuse me, can I have some more water, please? Award
And the Hot Wings Award goes to…..no, not Wingmen and the Hot Wings, but the chicken wing
munching group known as Kick Tease! Yes, in true form Kick Tease won their game easily, went to the
bar together, sat together, ate together, drank lots of water together, and left together before 11
p.m. Come on guys, you can do better this season, I know it! At least a few of your team members
(Melissa and Mike) and honorary members (Arianne) did stay and represent KT by helping the T-Bags
and DTTP close the bar at 2:30 a.m.
Best Drummer at CJ’s Award
Well, I guess I could rephrase this by calling it the “Only Drummer at CJ’s Award,” but Go Ugly Early’s
own Chris Macaluso played his heart out for several hours in front of a packed house of kickballers who
were partying it up after the first week’s games. While we were all pounding beers, he was pounding the drums purely for our listening enjoyment. Chris embodies the true spirit of kickball – willingly
playing for a team that is pre-destined for the cellar of the standings, and rocking it out so all of us
have a better time. So here’s to you Chris, this week’s winner of the most bodacious baller at the bar!
10
11
WYLD STALLYONS
7
Wyld Stallyons defeated Mind the Stepchildren 7 to
5 last Friday. MTS jumped out to a 4-0 lead on their
bunts, but WS came back with strong defense and a
rally in the second and fourth innings to jump ahead
7 to 5.
Kevin Bush of WS displayed strong pitching. WS took
a few innings to learn the nuances of defending the
bunt, but came on strong after that.
by Gerry
5
MIND THE STEPCHILDREN
The season opener for MTS proved to be a close
game! The team came out strong early, with a 4-1
lead. Feeling hot rocking their new rusty orange
colored shirts, MTS seemed unstoppable. The Wyld Stallyons, however, were persistent, and
the score was tied by the end of the 3rd inning. Due to
some unfortunate injuries by a few MTS players, the
game momentum shifted, and MTS ended up losing
by two runs. Shout outs to all our teammates that scored, as well as
our new additions from Boynton and Fort Lauderdale
leagues. Cheers to our virgin teammates as well,
especially our MVP of the game, Trish. Trish, who
has never played, had a great double play. Looking
forward to dressing up and hoeing down next week!
Thanks to Wyld Stallions for a great first game as this
is their first season...
by Brandon
NADS
3
NADS had a great kickoff to the new season...
Some highlights replayed from ESPN: Back in Black
begun as T-RO represented with her skills winning
RPS, SCAR, The BREEZE both showed off their off
season training legs with their aggressive base running,
to be KICKED in with a 2 RBI TRIPLE from our very
own Shhexshy Shlide Shannon (SSS)!!! WOAAAAAH
baby did that set the tone, the NADS are back in town!
We welcome some NEW NADS “CRUSHER” (NAD
OF WEEK for outstanding newcomer balls to the walls
performance on the field), LIMBER KIMBER, MANLY
STANLEY, eLViS, PEEZY and our newcomer double
trouble couple BENTLEY AND GEEBS who both got
on base in the second...
We were led by great pitching from BIG MAC and Fenway! BAM BAM had a great catch out in LF; Twinkle
Toes almost knocked out the refs with his Chinese
burping breath. Later at the bar we had an unstoppable
redemption flip cup team lined up... Geebs, Bentley,
Panara, “B,” eLVis, and CRUSHER, any questions??
THANK YOU! Great times had by all... untillllll next
week lets getta GOOOOOOOO NADS!
0
FEETS O’ FUSION
Well...as they say, you win some and you lose some...
and last Friday, we lost some. We had five returning
kickballers, six newbies and 13 Missing-in-Action
and unfortunately lost to the NADS 3-0.
I will say that even with 13 players on vacation, we
played an awesome game and all the newbies kicked
ass and did a great job!
We made a couple mistakes in the first inning where we
gave up all three runs.
Our defense held the
fort down for the next
five innings as everyone
got comfortable. The
NADS
were
great
sports as always, and
the refs were even
very
understanding
and helpful with the
newbies.
by Vaughan
by Hummel
12
THE BOSTON T-BAG PARTY 2
9
KICK TEASE
0
INCREDIBALLS
We came. We drank. We got conquered.
On the field, that is…
When Redemption at the bar came along, Kick Tease
was nowhere to be found, so the T-Bags did something
we’re great at: We played with ourselves. I put our
Redemption team for the night against me and any
other T-Bags I could round up and once again…
We came. We drank. We got conquered.
That’s about all I can remember about last Friday, but
I look forward to the debut of The Boston T-Bag Party
(AKA Los T-Bags) in North Miami this Thursday night.
And on Friday night, the Wyld Stallyons will learn the
meaning of…
“T-BAGS ON YO FAAAAACE!”
by Fee
MEATBALLS
12
13
WINGMEN & THE HOT WINGS 1
A Recap Haiku
A cold winter’s night -Wet field, tough team, Wingmen lost
CJ’s beer consoles.
13
DTTP
Drink Till They’re Pretty’s
quest for a Zero Runs Against
season ended in the top of the
first of game one, when Gabe
“Noodle Arm” Burden, trying
to throw a Wingman out at
third, threw a wet and sloppy
ball past our third baseman into oblivion, allowing their
runner to score. At that point, the score was Wingmen
1, DTTP 0. Clearly giving up that lone run motivated us,
as we went on a kicking tear, ripping off 15 runs in a
row to solidify the mercy rule in the 5th inning. Added
motivation came from Fee, who bet Sterling a bucket
that we would, in fact, mercy rule the Wingmen. Fee
and I joyfully collected on the Yuengling bucket at CJ’s
to revel in the win together. To top the night off, DTTP
crushed the Wingmen in Redemption four games to one!
DTTP very much looks forward to next week’s game
against Kick Tease, a club we have beaten thrice and
tied once. DTTP plans to keep that streak going in
week two as a good warm-up for the big week three
showdown of Boca’s top two clubs.
by RATMAN
FLORIDA FIST PUMPERS
12
0
GO UGLY EARLY
Go Ugly Early did just that Friday night. Twenty-five
minutes into a 0-0 game, the stinky pinky imploded
allowing 12 runs in one inning. FFP are a team to watch
out for, but they better be ready as their schedule only
gets tougher from here. The GUE’s got back on track
at the redemption table, beating out FFP 4-1. Guess
we still need some flip cup practice!
Looking forward to facing the mighty mighty blue team
next week! Stinky Pinky Let’s go Drinky!
by Sterling
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