Swine flu outbreak puts Union in national spotlight

56%
of us do or don’t take illegal drugs?
DRUG SURVEY RESULTS P. 4-5
ISSUE 1191 MAY 4th 09 courier.unionsociety.co.uk
FREE
Swine flu outbreak puts
Union in national spotlight
Kate McCann &
Marina King
News Editors
The national media descended on
Newcastle University campus last
week after a case of swine flu, the
first in the north-east; was confirmed
in a flatmate of three Newcastle
University students.
Over ten news crews and three
satellite vans could be seen parked
outside the union with journalists
probing students for more information
about the affected house-hold.
Amongst representatives from local
newspapers The Journal and The
Evening Chronicle were reporters
from national news broadcasters and
newspapers such as Sky News, The
Mirror, The Sun, The Telegraph and
BBC News.
“We would urge
students not to panic.
Anyone with concerns
about the virus
should contact NHS
direct or their GP”
The north-east case of swine flu, a
variant of the H1N1 strain, was the
sixth in the country to be confirmed
at the time of print and affected a
women living with three Newcastle
University undergraduate students.
The unnamed woman, an employee
of Procter and Gamble who had
recently returned from a holiday
in Mexico is understood to be
responding well to treatment in
hospital. Her three house-mates are
unaffected by the virus but have been
treated with the Tamiflu anti-viral
drug as a precaution.
The story broke after an email was
sent to all Newcastle University
students on Thursday morning,
informing them of a case of swine
flu in the city. It follows an on-going
media frenzy about a potential
pandemic of the virus which has lead
to claims that the threat has been
over-played in the media, causing
panic.
Third
year
Marketing
and
Management student, Lissy Gaskell,
told The Courier: “The surge of
media attention on the University
was surreal. I feel that the media
is exploiting the situation and
emphasising the drama to sell more
papers rather helping to control the
situation.”
Mick Warwicker, from the Newcastle
University press office commented to
The Courier;
“The University recognise that this
case is of great concern to students
and their families however we would
like to reiterate that so far, cases have
only been mild in the UK.
“We will obviously be keeping a
close eye on the situation in the coming
weeks but would urge students not to
panic. Anyone with concerns about
the virus should contact NHS direct
or their GP for more information.”
In the email sent to students, Dr
John Hogan, University Registrar
also stressed the need to remain calm
about the virus;
“The University has been notified
that a case of swine flu has been
confirmed in the city in an individual
who has recently returned from
Mexico.
“This person is not a Newcastle
University student, or a member of
staff. However, they are resident in
a house which is shared with two
Newcastle University students.
“Neither of the students concerned
has so far displayed any ‘flu-like
symptoms. Both students have
received the antiviral Tamiflu, and
they and the University have been
advised by the Health Protection
Agency that there is no need for the
students to isolate themselves from
the community unless they show
symptoms.”
The Union Society and The Courier
specifically
were
approached
throughout the day as the gathered
journalists tried to discover more
details about the infected woman
through her student flatmates.
Such levels of media attention
put the university and the student
union temporarily at the centre of the
nation’s latest fear over their health
and safety.
Although students are advised not
to panic, anyone with concerns about
swine flu should visit www.nhsdirect.
nhs.uk for a full list of symptoms and
advice.
A technician from the BBC watches on as his reporter broadcasts live from outside the Union
A. WILSON
This week’s meetings:
news
There will be no more section meetings until September
2009 when The Courier will begin again with a brand new
editorial team! For information about how you can get involved next term, contact [email protected].
The Courier would like to thank all of the writers and contributors who have been involved with the paper this year and
wish them a happy summer!
Inside this issue:
Drugs survey results analysed
pg. 4-5
NCL+ awards evening
pg. 7
Should Boris run for Prime Minister?
pg. 9
NEWS & COMMENT
Interview with Mark Umbers
pg. 13
How to survive graduation
pg. 16
The Lazy Student’s Guide - Conflict in Darfur
pg. 17
FEATURES
Strictly Come Dancing comes to Newcastle
pg. 26
Food Festival previewed
pg. 30
Music reviews The Rumble Strips
pg. 38
CULTURE
Interview with former England captain Will Carling
pg. 46
Interview with Durham cricket captain Will Smith
pg. 47
The Courier speaks to Jimmy Greene and Vicky Tyas
pg. 50
SPORT
The Team 08/09
Editor
Sam Parker
[email protected]
Film Editor
Ashley Fryer
[email protected]
Deputy Editor
Rich Noon
[email protected]
Music Editors
Heather Welsh
Dave Wingrave
[email protected]
News Editors
Marina King
Kate McCann
[email protected]
Features Editors
Edward Mansel Lewis
Betsy Powell
[email protected]
Sports Editors
David Coverdale
Jamie Gavin
[email protected]
Design Editor
Victoria Proudfoot
[email protected]
Arts Editor
Katie Witcombe
[email protected]
Entertainments Editor
Alice Vincent
[email protected]
Photo Editors
Mindaugas Miskinis
Alexander Wilson
[email protected]
Proof Readers
Laura Bennett
Elizabeth Ekers
Lucy Houlden
Emma Peasgood
Alexander Savage
[email protected]
Web Editors
Joe Currin
Chris Mandle
James Parker
[email protected]
Contact us on:
0191 239 3940
The Courier and Pulp,
Union Society, King’s Walk,
Newcastle upon Tyne.
NE1 8QB
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or the University of Newcastle-upon-Tyne.
Competition for University places
increases as UCAS reports surge in
older applicants
Charlie Oven
A recent report by The Guardian has
revealed that there will be ‘fierce
competition’ for University places in the
next academic year with a late surge in
older applicants.
Data from the University and College
Admission Service (UCAS) shows an
extra 38, 592 applicants for undergraduate
degrees at English universities, equating
to a rise of 8.8%. The increase in older
applicants has been explained by many
wanting to escape the current economic
recession. Among 21 to 24 year olds
numbers rose by 14.7% and those aged
25 and over rose 15.8%.
The stakes for a university place have
been further raised by a rise in overseas
applicants of 12%. The overall growing
demand for higher education has led
to the fear that universities will under
recruit rather than risk heavy financial
penalties for overshooting their student
quotas. Wes Streeting, president of the
National Union of Students, voiced his
‘concern’ arguing that “unless there is an
urgent expansion of places, universities
will be unable to meet this demand.”
In response to the rise in applicants,
government ministers have restricted
the number of students they can take
on in the next academic year to 10,000,
representing a cut of 5,000. According to
The Guardian this means a potential 28,000
people could miss out on university
places.
In defence, the higher education
minister David Lammy has claimed:
“Far from freezing or capping student
numbers, this government has presided
over a huge increase in people going to
University with an extra 30,000 in the
system since 1997.” Nevertheless the
current economic climate has inevitably
led to a reevaluation of circumstances.
Analysis:
Michael Foster
Facing the facts
The news that as many as 30,000 people
could be refused a University place this
summer is unfortunately a sign of the
fragile economic climate in which we
now find ourselves.
With the number of jobs available
falling and unemployment rising, it is
understandable that many who would
previously have left full time education
after A-Levels to find themselves a job
are now deciding to move to university
instead. Not only does a degree help you
find a job when there are less available,
but three years of studying with a student
loan is a much less stressful way of riding
out the recession.
This is also combined with how many
are being deterred from gap years
Talking to The Guardian, Pam Tatlow,
chief executive of the Million+ university
group, said that “The government will
have to fund more places unless it wants
to add to the unemployment queue”.
With more young people being denied
the opportunity of going to university,
many will be forced on to an uncertain
job market.
because of difficulties in financing
them, and also a rise in mature students
weighing up their options as the effects
of the recession begin to bite.
However, whilst the rise in University
applications is not so much of a surprise,
the Government’s response to this is
telling universities that no more than
10,000 extra places will be available due
to a freeze on admission levels to cut
costs.
What this shows is the current fragility of
the Government’s finances, that in order
to balance the books of our economy, up
to 30,000 people will end up unemployed
as opposed to being given the opportunity
that University represents. It is also a
grim reminder of who the true victims of
the recession are, not the bankers or the
politicians, but ordinary people caught
up in circumstances outside of their
control.
The ramifications of this are that the
future for many students, both at school
and University, is a lot less secure than
they had hoped for. Due to the nature of
the recession, opportunities for students
are bound to decrease, and this recent
news is an unfortunate example of this.
University leads the way with research
Newcastle scientists at the fore-front of groundbreaking stem-cell research
Claire Childs
Britain is currently the leading nation
in stem-cell research, but it is our
universities, and especially scientists at
Newcastle, that have been particularly
influential.
Over 100 stem-cell research teams are
currently working on projects in Britain,
many of which are based at universities.
Since the first stem-cell research
began at Cambridge University in the
1960s, other universities across the
country have contributed their findings.
The University of Sheffield recently
researched a treatment for hearing loss,
while at University College London,
Professor Pete Coffey is leading a team
who are looking into a cure for a common
cause of blindness. He told The Telegraph:
“The technology has come of age a lot
faster than people expected. We all saw
this as a technology that had potential for
clinical application, but it has gone very
quickly down that route.”
At Newcastle University, Professor
Lyle Armstrong led a research team who
successfully merged an egg from a cow
with a human cell.
When such research projects on animalhuman hybrid cells were permitted by
the Human Fertilisation and Embryology
Authority, Professor Armstrong told the
BBC: “It is a positive outcome not just for
our work but for the progress of British
C
M
science in general and we hope that this
will lead to new technologies to benefit
everyone.”
Ultimately, Lyle and his team hope to
discover how to create stem-cells which
can grow tissue matched to the genes of
a patient, allowing for the replacement
of tissues damaged by injury or disease.
Such discoveries are hoped to pave the
way for a new era in medicine.
Y
K
NEWS
4th May 2009
3
[email protected]
A.WILSON
Stressed students taught to relax
Lucy Pask
Third year architecture students are
being offered free relaxation classes
to help combat high levels of stress
as they approach the final weeks of
their course.
The classes, which are run by the
Union Welfare Office, aim to advise
students about the symptoms related
to anxiety and stress, and how best
to cope with it.
Relaxation techniques were also
taught to help students use exercise
as a form of stress release.
Architecture
Undergraduate
Raichel Warren, who attended one
of the courses two weeks ago, said
she thought that the classes were
worthwhile.
“There were some symptoms of
anxiety that I have that I hadn’t
related to stress, so I think that
was helpful to know” she told The
Courier.
“I don’t know if they made me feel
relaxed, as such, but I did enjoy the
classes,” she added
The Union’s WAC (welfare and
campaigns) committee and crew
VOX POP: Mindaugas Miskinis asks...
What are your thoughts on the swine flu outbreak?
Anna Kunzlik, 1st year,
Languages and Linguistics
“I wasn’t worried until
I talked to my friend
recently. She is really
worried about it and even
tried to buy a mask from
Boots, but they don’t sell
them yet. Talking to her
got me a bit worried too.”
Josh Fenhert, 1st year, sociology
“I think it’s all just a moral
panic like there was with
SARS, bird flu and so on.
It’s all just a blow over.
We’ll survive.”
David Mann, 2nd year,
Chemical Engineering
Sophie Brown, 1st year, psychology
“It’s just a load of hype.
I’m not really afraid.
There are 80,000 students
in Newcastle University.
If one of them got sick it
doesn’t mean that all of us
will get infected.”
“I’m not worried at all. I
think media exaggerates it
as they always do. Nothing
bad happened from the
bird flu, so I think it’s the
same this time.”
Maudie Oppenheim, 1st
year, sociology
“I admit that it’s quite
scary, but you can’t freak
out every time you hear
something like that on
the media. If everyone
started panicking and
locked themselves in their
rooms, than we wouldn’t
be able to lead a normal life
anymore.”
William Bray, 1st year, sociology
“I actually think that is
good that government is
taking precautions. Just to
be on the safe side. But I’m
not worried too much about
it as I think it’s still a bit
exaggerated.”
Photos: Mindaugas Miskinis
are also offering help and support
to students as part of their ‘Stressed
Out Students’ campaign.
Look out for the stall in the library
on Tuesdays and Thursdays of the
weeks commencing the 11th and
the 18th May where the crew will be
giving out revision and relaxation
tips and freebies, including; herbal
tea bags, chocolate, pens and
cosmetics.
Also, if you fancy a session of
relaxation, why not try out reiki?
FREE sessions will be available in
the Training Room of the Union
from 10-2 on the 12th and the 19th
May - so why not give it a go?
To guarantee a time slot, book
an appointment by emailing giag.
[email protected]
stating
your
preferred half hour slot.
Grow your
own vegetables
Jessica Tully
Students are being encouraged to
start growing their own fruit and
vegetables in an attempt to save a few
extra pennies in the recent economic
situation.
As fresh fruit and vegetable prices
continue to soar in supermarkets,
some students have taken to growing
fresh produce in their own back
yard.
Students at the University of
London planted their first vegetable
seeds last year and have reported
that the financial benefits have been
considerable.
One fourth year medical student
told The Guardian: “We made such
a saving on our food bill that there
wasn’t any question about going for
it again this spring.
“For the price of a few packets
of seeds and compost we cut our
shopping bill by around £10-£15 a
week on fresh vegetables”.
At the University of Gloucestershire,
students launched the Allotment
Society, which involves clearing,
digging and rotating land that the
student’s union managed to get hold
of. They now have easy access to
onions, garlic and broad beans.
Second year English Literature
student, Lyz Bacon, told The Courier
“I spend about £20 a week on fruit
and vegetables – that’s about £80
a month, which is quite a lot on a
student budget when you think
about it.
“We already have a few growing
herbs in our kitchen, so extending
this to a few tomatoes or beans might
not be such a bad idea!”
However, second year Computer
Science student, Shaun English,
commented, “We barely have
enough space to throw a ball about
in our garden so finding land large
enough to plant seeds would be a bit
of a problem for us”.
Students considering an attempt
at The Good Life can head to the
library to read up on what should be
planted, and when.
The BBC has also launched a
campaign called ‘Dig In’ which
aims to encourage everyone to grow
their own grub. A free leaflet is on
offer to download from the website
which gives advice on how to set
about growing your own fruit and
vegetables and top tips to cut down
the cost. Even celebs such as Radio
One DJ Sara Cox are getting stuck
in, who is blogging her experience
online.
The initiative promises to help you
‘learn to love your lettuce’, ‘get the
best out of beetroot’ and even ‘supersize your squash’.
For more info visit - www.bbc.
co.uk/digin
4
NEWS
4th May 2009
[email protected]
The 2009 Drug Survey
Over last term, The Courier asked you to tell us anonymously about your illegal drug use
and views on the wider debates. Here are the results.
Sam Parker
Editor
In 2003, The Guardian newspaper
claimed that 500,000 people in the UK
used class A drugs.
Anyone with a good knowledge of
what ‘class A’ actually means (and
61% of you claim to have just that)
will know that a class A drugs user
could be anything from a heroin
addict to a teenager taking ecstasy in
a nightclub.
And since 31% of drug users
studying at Newcastle University
claim ecstasy is one of their drugs of
choice, that means that under current
legislation, ‘up to seven years in
prison or an unlimited fine or both’
is the possible fate you can expect to
share with people in possession of
heroin or crack. And if you’re selling
ecstasy to your mates, then in theory
you could face ‘up to life in prison or
an unlimited fine or both’ along with
heroin dealers across the country.
Nevertheless, in the view of 44% of
you, the laws surrounding ecstasy
use are either ‘just right’ or ‘a little
too relaxed...’
...And on the subject of ‘relaxing’
- the oft-quoted benefit of cannabis
for its supporters - 75% of you
believe that the laws surrounding
that particular drug are somewhere
between ‘just right’ and ‘far too
harsh’, with only 9% of you feeling
that the laws surrounding cannabis
are ‘far too relaxed’.
But a bit of pot has long been the
staple for students who choose to
dabble in mind-altering substances what’s new on the scene?
Unsuprisingly, cannabis is the
number one drug on campus, with
31% of Newcastle University’s drug
users claiming to use the plant, 24%
every six months or so.
After cannabis, ecstasy is the second
most commonly used drug among
us with 27% of drugs users saying
they have tried E since arriving at
university (and 20% before they got
here).
After cannabis and ecstasy, the
rest of the top five most commonly
used drugs are MDMA, cocaine and
ketamine.
Perhaps pertinent to the ‘gate-way’
theory that cannabis in many cases
leads users to other, ‘harder’ drugs,
the survey shows that weed is the
only drug in which a decrease in use
is evident among users after they join
university (down from 57% to 53%)
with all the other ‘top five’ seeing a
marked increase in usage after joining
university.
The greatest increase is in ketamine
use, lending weight to the perception
of the horse-tranquilliser as a ‘uni
drug’. While only 8% of drug users
sampled ketamine before joining
university, 21% of users say they
tried it after they got here.
When it comes to opinions on
drugs in general, the statistics paint
a picture of a reasonably liberal-mind
ed community, despite 44% of you
being adamant that you have never
taken anything more illicit than a
cheap treble.
Although
45%
of
everyone
surveyed believes that drugs play
a ‘fairly large’ role in damaging
society in Britain, an overwhelming
majority of 82% believe that the best
way of dealing with the problem is
through rehabilitation and therapy
Lifestyles
programmes, compared to only 13%
who felt prison sentences are the
most effective anti-drugs measure.
On the on-going debate over
whether or not to follow Holland and
legalize and control cannabis use,
61% said you would be in favour of
such legislation.
However, when the same question
was to you about ecstasy (70%) and
all illegal drugs (87%), a clear majority
felt both measures would be a liberal
step too far.
All-in-all, The Courier drug survey
reveals a community of people who
are split in their choice of lifestyles
but largely unanimous in the view
that education and rehabilitation are
the correct methods of dealing with
the undeniable social problems that
arise from drug abuse.
Over the page are some of your
more lively opinions.
NO
NO
YES
Other
YES
Speed
41%
Meth
59%
MDMA
Magic Mushrooms
44%
2a. Had you taken illegal drugs
before coming to University?
Heroin
56%
Crack Cocaine
MDMA
Acid
Ketamine
Ketamine
Cocaine
Cocaine
Cannabis
Cannabis
Ecstasy
0%
1a. Have you taken illegal drugs
since coming to university?
£100+
£50+
23%
20%
30%
50%
Ecstasy
0%
Street/club dealers
Other
4%
25%
41%
£2-5
17%
- He tried cannabis before he got to Newcastle
University, tried ecstasy since he got here and does
both every six months, spending £20-30 at a time and
buying from friends.
67%
Friends
- He views the current laws on cannabis as being
somewhere between just right and a bit too harsh,
and the laws on ectasy as somewhere between just
right and a bit too relaxed.
- Mr. Average believes drugs play a fairly large
role in damaging society and believes that rehab and
therapy is the correct way to deal with this damage.
- He supports the legalization of cannabis, but not
of ecstasy or any other illegal drug.
£5-10
3. How much on average do you spent each
time you purchase illegal drugs?
Mr. Average
- According to the survey, Mr. Average is a male
student from the North East in his 3rd year of study.
4%
A regular
dealer
10% 20% 30% 40% 50%
2b. If so, which drugs?
1b. If so, which drugs?
2%
3%
£20-30
10%
40%
4. Who do you usually buy your drugs from?
- His explaination for why he chooses
to take illegal drugs is that it is
enjoyable and safe in moderation
C
M
Y
K
NEWS
4th May 2009
Those that do...
“Cheaper and better than alcohol.
Also seen as the cool thing to do peer pressure.”
“They enhance certain situations. Just
as music, drink or company does.”
“I get stoned because I like getting
stoned, I take ecstasy because it
makes you feel good and gives you
lots of energy to dance all night, and
acid and mushrooms are really fun.”
“It’s fun”
“It is a largely non-harmful mind
broadening experience, if done
properly and carefully. It has helped
me get through a number of life
problems that may have otherwise
resulted in serious depression.
Everybody should try everything
once.”
“I like to try everything once, I know
the risks and do it in a safe way.”
“Most of the time they
help you to escape reality
and have a cheaper
night out. Generally
they are fun and overly
stigmatized by the media.”
“Feels good!
Makes a good
night better. Euphoria and new
sensations.”
“Because in moderation they are fun
and enjoyable.”
“Because I wanted to experiment, and
see if I enjoyed them or not. I do not
believe that you can make a decision
on something without having tried it
first, and do not see any real difference
between illegal drugs and alcohol.”
5
Opinions
[email protected]
...and those that don’t
Far too relaxed
Don’t know
9%
21% 3%
15%
Far too
A bit too
relaxed
harsh
27%
15%
9% 14%
Far too
harsh
20%
A bit too
relaxed
18%
27%
A bit too
harsh
Far too relaxed “It
Don’t know
A bit too
harsh
Just right
24%
“Because I have the most fun when
on drugs. And you only live once,
baby!”
“I enjoy the strange and special
experiences one can have while using
drugs.”
“My youth is fleeting. Enjoy it whilst
I can.”
Just right
“I am looking to be a solicitor so the
risk of being caught is huge.”
1b. How do you view the current laws
surrounding ecstasy use?
1a. How do you view the current laws
surrounding cannabis use?
Very small
Fines
None at all
2%
5%
5% 11%
Very large
Prison
sentances
13%
36%
Fairly small
45%
82%
Fairly large
2a. How large a role do you feel illegal drugs
play in damaging society
Rehab & therapy
programmes
2b. What do you feel is the best method for
dealing with drug abusers
YES
49%
NO
30%
61%
NO
70%
YES
YES
NO
“It is mind altering in a good way. It
breaks down social and psychological
barriers.”
“I smoke weed every day
because I really enjoy it, I
can function perfectly well
in society. I ran the Great
North Run in 1hr 30mins.”
“I took them because I wanted to
try them to form my own opinion
about them. My friends take them
occasionally and I wanted to see what
it was like. The fact that it is illegal
or “dangerous” didn’t put me off at
all.”
3a. Would you support legislation
that proposed to legalize and
control cannabis?
Very poor
3b. Would you support legislation
that proposed to legalize and
control ecstasy?
Excellent
7% 12%
Fairly poor
33%
13%
87%
3c. Would you support legislation
that proposed to legalize and
control all drugs?
UK Classification of illegal drugs
Class A
Ecstasy, LSD, heroin, cocaine, crack,
magic mushrooms, amphetamines
(if prepared for injection).
Class B
Fairly good
49%
4. How well would you say you understand the current classification laws?
“Had a bad experience on pills.
Worried about the effect on my
mentality and clarity of thought. Not
worth it on balance.”
“I don’t feel that I need drugs to have
a good time and I believe that if you
rely on drugs to escape something in
your life you need to see someone.”
“I would never want to be in a state
were I could not control my actions
and behaviour.”
“Many people experiment with drugs
when they are younger, even though
it would be better not to, it is more
understandable; curiousity, peer
pressure, excitement etc. However,
I think as you get older it is rather
pathetic to use drugs…”
“Because I enjoy it.”
“I consider the general political and
public opinion of certain drugs to be
inaccurate in comparison to medical
and scientific evidence. I take care
in what I consume and do so for
recreational and social purposes.”
“There is no need, it’s a waste
of money, and shows a lack in
personality.”
“I feel that University students should
be more mature than to give in to peer
pressure, which I have seen many
people do.”
“I honestly feel I am in more control
and feel safer when taking MDMA
than when I drink.”
“Because it is my right to do so,
and there is no harm in doing so,
PARTICULARLY WITH CANNABIS.
the same can be said for ecstacy and
MDMA which can make even the
most intolerable of persons loving
and adoring.”
corrupts the nation and
the body. It is addictive and
wrecks your life and more
importantly other people’s
also. Cannabis has been
found to be damaging also.
Individuals who take drugs
are ill and unproductive
members of society.”
Amphetamines, Cannabis,
Methylphenidate (Ritalin),
Pholcodine.
Class C
Tranquilisers, some painkillers,
Gamma hydroxybutyrate
(GHB), Ketamine.
“I have lots of opportunities
ahead of me once I leave
university and there is
enough to do and enough
ways to enjoy yourself
without trying out drugs
that might affect you in
various ways or get you a
criminal record. Drink is
good enough!”
“Social stigma - generally associated
with wasters who need it as a crutch
in life. It’s illegal and can ruin your
career prospects, I’d rather not take the
risk. Health issues – I’m healthy and
don’t need it risking my welfare.”
“Stupid,
waste
of
irresponsible and unsafe”
money,
“I like to be in control of my body,
more to the point I like Jesus to work
through me and how can He do that
if I’m sky high on pills!! Also who
wants chemicals pumping around
your body. Your body is a temple
and we shouldn’t abuse it.”
“Experimented with them enough
in my teens, am now interested in
finding kicks in other things. No
problem with them though.”
“I have seen how it has ruined the
lives of people I know - with one
dying of contaminated drugs.”
“I have a career within the Air Force
to think about where drug use is not
tolerated. In addition, I have no desire
to, I’m happy as I am and do not think
drugs will enhance my life…”
“Ethical
implications
on
the
developing world and funding
Britain’s criminal underworld.”
NEWS
7
4th May 2009
[email protected]
Students shine at NCL+ awards
National News
Awards ceremony highlights student achievement in extra curricular activities
Kate McCann
News Editor
Last week saw the first NCL+ Student
Achievement awards take place at
The Assembly Rooms in Newcastle.
The ceremony was attended by Vice
Chancellor Professor Chris Brink and
250 students, sponsors, University
and Union staff.
The
awards
celebrated
the
achievements of students from all
disciplines across the University
for their involvement in various
extra curricular activities, societies
and charity work. The event was
organised by NCL+, a foundation
jointly supported by the Union
society and the University itself,which
seeks to encourage and promote
personal enterprise and community
engagement among the student
body.
The awards attracted over 130
entries from students within eleven
categories, including the surprise
category,
the
‘Vice-Chancellor’s
Award for Outstanding Personal
Achievement’, which went to Jodie
Symington for her fund-raising and
awareness-raising efforts for the
Cystic Fibrosis Trust.
Jodie, who suffers from Cystic
Fibrosis herself, impressed the Vice
Chancellor with her expedition to
Everest Base camp and for completing
the Everest marathon.
Winners received £300 and runnersup £100 in prizes, which were made
possible by contributions from
sponsors Npower and the Alumni
Association.
David
Coverdale,
who
was
nominated for an award within
the ‘Media and Communications’
category commented to The Courier;
“It was a fantastic evening and it
was brilliant to see all the amazing
voluntary work that Newcastle
students do recognised by these
awards. Hopefully the event will
continue to grow and encourage
more people to get involved in extracurricular activities at University.”
As inflation turns negative for the
first time since 1960, students could
find themselves in the unusual
position of being paid, rather than
paying interest on their student
loans.
Interest payments on the loans
are linked to the Retail Price Index
(RPI) measure of inflation in order
to maintain the real value of the
debts as prices rise. Most people
with loans will see the value of
their debt increase as deflation takes
hold. However, the RPI link means
that with a deflating economy the
interest rate should be set at a level
which pays students’ debts back for
them.
Oli Michelson, third year English
Literature student told The Courier,
“While this is beneficial for students
like myself, it is a sorry reflection on
the state of the British economy that
* Society Officer of the Year: – Ruth
Garside (Irish Dance Society) Medicine.
For a complete list of winners and
runners-up and for more information
about NCL+ visit - www.ncl.ac.uk/
nclplus
The complete list of winners is:
* Outstanding Personal Achievement
Award: – Jodie Symington – Applied
Biology
* Community Spirit Volunteering: –
Lauren Parkinson - Dentistry
* Community Capacity-building: Rachel Foyster – English Literature
and Rebecca Jones – Combined
Studies
* Contribution to Sport: - Ciaran
Hutchinson – Medical & Molecular
Bioscience
* Environmental Volunteering: –
Annette Morris – Fine Art
* Media and Communications: – Sarah
Grant – Marketing and Management
Student loans
could earn interest
Adam Johnstone
* Academic and Peer Representation –
Aimee Philipson – Combined Studies
* Arts and Culture: – Miriam Orcutt
- Medicine
* Most Improved Society of the Year:
– Power Kite Society
* Best Society of the Year: – Malaysian
Society
an interest rate can effectively pay
off our debts.”
So far the government has avoided
confirming that students will
be eligible for negative interest
payments.
As the new rates will not take effect
until September it need not make a
decision until then. Both the NUS
and the Department for Innovation,
Universities and Skills (DIUS) are
convinced that loans issued before
1998 must be eligible for negative
interest payments, however due to
a change in the law, loans taken out
after 1998 are less straightforward.
Loans taken out since 1998 should
be fixed to either the RPI or the base
lending rates of the major banks
plus an additional one percent,
depending on which is the lowest.
In theory this means that interest
rates should follow the RPI below
zero, but a DIUS spokesperson said
ministers were considering their
options and would make a decision
in due course.
Samantha Hockney
Students held in terror raids freed
without charge
Nine men detained as part of the
recent terrorism security operations
were, last week, released without
charge.
The men, all Pakistani citizens who
were in the country on student visas,
now face deportation after being
handed to immigration authorities
by police. Aged between 22 and 38,
they had been detained for 13 out
of a possible 28 days but had to be
released as there was no substantial
evidence linking them to terrorist
activity. Two of the 12 arrested
during Operation Pathway on April
8th are still being questioned under
anti-terrorism legislation. An 18year-old student was transferred to
the custody of the UK Border Agency
after three days in detention.
Dundee University student jailed
for sex assault
Newcastle University’s Academic Registrar Cathryn Harvey presenting an award to winners P. DIXON
Equality bill
seeks to bridge
gender gap
Bethany Sissons
A new Equalities Bill has been
published, which will tackle the
inequalities surrounding gender,
social class and age in our society.
Harriet Harman, Minister for
Equality, pledges that the bill will in
particular bridge the gender gap and
create a ‘more fair and more equal
society’.
Companies employing over 250
people will be made to publish their
hourly wage rate for men and women
by 2013. The government believes that
the only way to end prejudice is to
expose the hidden issues between the
employer and employee. If inequality
is not discussed then it simply
continues.
Yet in this time of economic crisis,
some people believe that the bill
is unnecessary. David Frost, who
represents the British Chambers of
Commerce, says that due to the bill, it
will take longer to escape the current
recession. Harman however refutes
this idea, commenting to the BBC
that the bill will create a ‘stronger
economy and more prosperous society
in the future’. Harman emphasises
the fact that the economic climate
cannot prevent us from destroying
inequality.
However, small businesses may
struggle with the introduction of the
bill. This is yet another employment
law that they will have to adhere to.
The idea that our society requires
a discrimination bill has also been
perceived negatively. Critics argue
that if our government were effective
then inequalities would not exist.
However, discrimination is still
apparent in our society. Despite the
introduction of the Equal Pay Act in
1970, 23% of women still earn less
each hour than men.
Evidence also shows that by the
age of six, clever children from poor
families have been overtaken at school
by less intelligent children from upper
class families.
As part of the bill, clauses forcing
employees not to reveal their pay will
be banned and public bodies will be
appointed social economic duties.
Councils will need to ensure that
children from poorer backgrounds,
living in more deprived areas, have
the same access to good schools as
middle class children.
As graduation approaches for many
Newcastle students, they may now
be hoping that with the introduction
of the new Equality Bill, their future
career prospects look brighter and
fairer.
A student who subjected a teenage
girl to a ‘terrifying and degrading’
sexual assault at Dundee University’s
halls of residence has been jailed for
five years.
20-year old Calum Cuthill was
found guilty of the attack, which
happened in November 2007, at
the trial at Edinburgh High Court
in February. The court heard that
zoology student Cuthill had been
friends with his victim and had
wanted someone to talk to on the
night of the attack. Cuthill claimed
that conversation between the two
turned sexual and they went on to
have consensual sex.
The prosecution, however, said that
Cuthill prevented the fellow student
from leaving her flat in West Park
Villas before threatening her with
violence and sexually assaulting her.
The Student Loans Company
introduce new repayment scheme
The Student Loans Company (SLC)
has introduced new ways to recover
outstanding arrears from graduate
students with pre-1998 loans.
The SLC actively contacts customers
to discuss repayments and to pursue
arrears but they will now send letters
out to those who consistently fail to
repay what is owed, requesting they
contact the SLC within 28 days to
consider the options available to
them.
After this date, unless there
are
extenuating
circumstances,
customers who are not meeting their
payment obligations will be registered
with UK Credit Reference Agencies.
The Student Loans Company claims
this new initiative will ensure loans
are properly collected and will
also prevent graduates getting into
long-term debt through excessive
borrowing.
Student commits suicide
‘losing love for humanity’
after
A promising student was found
hanged from a bridge after writing a
farewell poem condemning Britain’s
‘celebrity culture.’ Lance Cleverley,
25, was found by a dog walker in a
park near his home last week. Lance
was pronounced dead at the scene,
leaving friends and family baffled as
to why the aspiring Oxford student
would take his own life.
A note was later found on the
internet entitled ‘A Last Note’ –
written by Lance before he killed
himself. The 18-line poem described
‘losing love for humanity’ and
blamed Britain’s growing celebrity
culture.
8
COMMENT
[email protected]
4th May 2009
comment
Just how far
would you be
willing to go?
KATE MCCANN considers whether the concept of
‘ethical’ journalism is a realistic one and asks, just
how far should journalists go to get a story?
I
f you were a journalist, just how far
would you be willing to go for a news
story? Would you tread on political
toes, betray a friend or lie to get what
you needed?
This week, The Courier team found
ourselves at the centre of the media
scrum which came as a result of the
swine flu case in Newcastle. Tied to
the University because the infected
woman lived with three Newcastle
students, the press descended
on campus almost immediately;
apparently after a student posted the
outbreak on social networking site
Twitter.
Being party to the making of a
breaking national news story, although
exciting, was also fairly illuminating
for a journalist-to-be. And being in the
midst of seasoned ‘real’ journalists, all
eager to find out exactly what we knew
about the students involved, made me
question just how far I would go to get
a news story; especially something
as ultimately global as the swine flu
virus outbreak.
Faced with trying to get the names
of the students involved for our
own front page story (admittedly
nowhere near as essential as it was
for the Telegraph, Sun or Sky News
who were all represented here last
week), we found ourselves stumbling
into the murky world of journalist
insider-trading. Suddenly, the office
phone and our mobiles were ringing
constantly all day, Jeremy from the
Daily Mirror called persistently, trying
to beg, steal or borrow any contact or
information we could offer, however
irrelevant. Part of me, the part that
wasn’t completely awestruck at the
mere thought of speaking to someone
who works for a ‘real’ newspaper, was
tempted to lead him on a little, offer
him dead-end information in return
for promises of work experience.
In truth, we knew little more than
they did and we also knew that even
if we did get the name first, by the
time we went to print at the end of
the week the story would have been
splashed over the front of every paper
in the country and it would have
become old news. Such are the pitfalls
of producing a weekly newspaper in
the age of 24 hour, up to the minute
news reporting.
Still, it was fun while it lasted and it
did raise some interesting questions.
We were better positioned than any
of the national news teams to get hold
of the names of the students involved
and for a while, we became as dogged
in our attempts as they were. We
trawled facebook for status updates,
called friends and followed up any
possible lead we could get, even
though most were dead-ends or jokes
played on unsuspecting flatmates.
It became very easy to get caught
up in the adrenaline and atmosphere
that surrounds a breaking news story,
especially with satellite news vans
parked right outside and journalists
striding purposefully around campus.
And it forced us to make decisions
that ordinarily, we would rarely have
had to make. Should we pass on the
details of students who we thought
knew the girls, but didn’t want to
talk? Or should our role as a student
newspaper be to protect the students
that we ultimately do the job for in the
first place?
In the end of course, we kept the
names close to our chest and rightly so,
as this edition goes to press the names
of the students involved remain out
of the national spotlight and the girls
have thus avoided being harassed by
over-eager hacks. However, some in
the media would have given those
names freely, citing the age old
argument about freedom of the press
and an obligation to inform the public.
Of course, there would be no mention
of the vast sums of money involved in
gaining a front page scoop, especially
in such difficult economic times when
almost every newspaper is struggling
to stay afloat.
“Would you tread on
political toes, betray
a friend or lie to get
what you needed?”
There have been many examples of
this culture of ‘unethical’ journalism,
one of the most recent and perhaps
most illuminating, was the case of
Jade Goody, whose death was openly
capitalised upon by almost every
media outlet in the country.
There have been many other
examples, one of the most notable
being 9/11 and ‘Spin Doctor’ Jo Moore,
whose email advising government
that it would be a ‘good day to bury
bad news’ was sent before the towers
even fully collapsed.
Inevitably, the close relationship
between the media and government
and the fact that most newspapers
are currently in financial dire straits
has bred an environment of intense
competition in journalism.
The need to produce stories that
sell and make money for what are
ultimately, not organisations seeking
to inform and educate the public, but
businesses driving to make a profit;
has caused many to question the
principles of journalism, including
myself.
In a global community, saturated
by news outlets, where key players
like Rupert Murdoch own terrifying
shares of the world’s media output,
one has to question whether the
concept of ethical reporting is even
possible anymore.
The ultimate sacrifice
When Margret Heywood agreed to expose serious failings at the
hospital she worked in she never imaged she’d lose her job, MARINA
KING discusses censorship and the ethics of whistleblowing.
I
s breaching a code of ethics and
confidentiality to serve a greater
purpose justifiable? The Nursing
and Midwifery council doesn’t
think so -and have been in the
media spotlight recently for their
actions against Margret Heywood,
a nurse struck off for breaching
patient confidentiality due to
her participation in a Panorama
documentary for the BBC.
Margret helped the BBC expose
a hospital’s negligence towards
patients for a programme in 2005,
secretly filming patients, but her
‘whistleblowing’ has ended her
thirty year career in nursing.
Not only do I agree that the
decision to punish Margret
Heywood is unfair, but I also feel
that in this case, the breach in
confidentiality was called for. The
ethics of documentaries which
show patients can be problematic
– but in some cases I feel that by
doing so, some important issues
can be highlighted. In incidents
such as this, the public deserve
to know, and such treatment of
patients should not be covered up,
not only to encourage action to be
taken at the hospital in question,
but to provide people with the
confidence to ‘whistleblow’ in
other situations.
However, the film can be viewed
as having a negative impact despite
its good intentions, as it created a
frenzy of media attention which
can cause further problems in the
NHS rather than solving them.
Though the aim of the film was
to highlight a serious issue within
the NHS’s practices and care of
patients, it was an isolated one.
The negative light it casts on the
NHS can only increase the stress
on nurses who are actually doing
their job. There are clearly concerns
that it would create the impression
that all nurses are negligent, which
is far from the case. Having a sister
who is a nurse, and experienced
good care of my own relatives in
hospital, I am in no doubt that
clearly the majority of the nurses
in the NHS do a fantastic job.
The decision reached by the
Nursing and Midwifery council
is understandable – Margaret
Heywood filmed patients without
their consent, and despite gaining
permission for those making
the final cut of the film, it is
questionable whether those left out
in the edit gave their permission –
even if they were not seen by the
public, the footage will have be
seen by the programme makers.
Even nurses doing research have
to gain permission from an ethical
committee – these rules are there
for the protection of the patients
and their dignity. However, I feel
that the breach in confidentiality is
only a technical one.
Panorama recently broadcast a
follow up defending theirs and
Margret’s decisions to film and
publicise the footage. They stress
that they received permission of
those in the film, or their next of
kin, to show the footage. Relatives
of the patients have revealed that
they felt that it was a worthy cause
and that the public should be made
aware in order to cause action to
be taken.
Margret insists that she felt this
was the only option and that
she had tried the official route to
complain and had seen no results.
The decision to strike off Margret
is based on her filming of patients
– if they gave their permission,
surely the breach in confidentiality
should be void? If the rules are
there for their own protection, in
this case surely more protection
was provided through breaking
the rules.
In 1967, Titicut Follies, a
documentary
by
Frederick
Wiseman about the treatment
of patients at Bridgewater State
Hospital for the criminally insane
in Bridgewater, Massachusetts
in the USA, was banned by the
government for violating patients’
privacy and dignity. However,
like Panorama, Wiseman received
permission from all the patients or
their legal guardians. He felt that
the government of Massachusetts
intervened to protect its own
reputation, as it portrayed the
hospital in a bad light. It wasn’t
until 1987 when relatives of inmates
who died sued the hospital,
believing that if the film had been
shown then their lives could have
been saved, that the film’s case
was heard by the Judicial Supreme
Court, who finally allowed its
release in 1991. Though privacy
ethics had been breached, it was
an extreme measure which could
have had a positive impact.
Though such drastic measures of
censorship were not taken against
the Panorama film, this incident
shows what may have happened if
Margret hadn’t allowed her voice
to be heard.
Many people have come to her
defence, believing that the choice
to strike her off the nursing register
was wrong. The Royal College of
Nurses released a petition, stating
“We believe that Margaret was
justified in exposing the worrying
conditions at her hospital and that
the documentary shed light on
matters that the public deserved to
know about” which has over thirty
four thousand signatures. Surely
the good intentions, and results,
outweigh the technical breach of
privacy.
I feel that Margret Heywood
should not be penalised for
standing up for basic human care;
breaking confidentiality ethics
seems a small price to pay for the
vast impact she will have had on
many patients’ lives. It is a shame
that by consequently causing a
vast change in the hospital and
therefore improving life for many
patients, Margret has to pay the
steep price. The nurse who was
caring and who believed in the
very basic of ethics was punished
for the failings of others and their
ignorance of human dignity and
care.
C
M
Y
K
COMMENT
4th May 2009
9
[email protected]
Is International adoption ethical?
After the recent controversey surrounding Madonna’s bid to adopt another child from Malawi, CHRISTABEL
DICKSON debates the contentious issue of international adoption and asks, does she really have the child’s best
interests at heart?
L
ast month Madonna travelled to
Malawi in a bid to adopt a three-year
old African orphan. Her petition to
adopt Mercy James was rejected by
a local judge because the singer had
not lived in Malawi for 18 months,
as is required by law. She has been
set an appeal date for May 4.
Madonna, who has two biological
children,
previously
adopted
an African child from the same
orphanage - David Banda, in 2006.
Madonna’s decision to adopt a
second child has been widely
criticised by international charities,
and has since sparked hot debate
over whether it is morally right that
parents from more affluent countries
should be allowed to adopt children
from different cultures.
Certainly in theory, the idea of
a multi-millionaire welcoming an
impoverished African orphan into
her home seems ideal. Indeed,
Madonna, like other wealthy
families who seek to adopt from
across the border, has the advantage
of wealth and luxury to provide
greatly improved lifestyles for these
children. Undoubtedly they will
receive the benefits of a far superior
education to anything they could ever
have expected in the orphanages of
less affluent countries. The prospect
of international adoption gives
them the opportunity to enjoy the
privileges of a life they could only
have dreamt of in their previous
homes; they will want for nothing.
However, I think sometimes this
idyllic idea overshadows the ethical
aspects associated with overseas
adoption. Is the adoption of a child,
and by this we mean removing a
child from their culture, family, and
heritage, - a solution to the growing
numbers of orphaned children in
the poorer areas of the world?
The cultural transition from
countries in the sub Saharan Africa
to the UK is massive. To take a
child from somewhere like Malawi,
Africa, and move them to the UK
would be to completely change
their societal and cultural values.
Fair enough, the child might be too
young to be fully affected by such a
change, but nevertheless, what right
do we have to impose our cultural
values on these children, before
giving them the chance to decide for
themselves?
The majority of these orphans
are placed in orphanages, with the
intention that this will give them
a better start in life, because their
families cannot afford to look after
them on their own. It is more than
likely that these children have
living family available to them, if
not a living parent. Therefore, how
can we justify transplanting a child
thousands of miles away from their
homes, when they have a living,
loving parent.
Under the contract which allowed
Madonna to adopt David Banda,
now four years old, Madonna had
to agree to take him back to Malawi
regularly, to visit his natural father.
“...what right
do we have
to impose our
cultural values
on these children,
before giving
them the chance
to decide for
themselves?”
However, Madonna’s visit to
Malawi last month was the first
time Mr. Banda had seen his son
in two years. It was reported that
David did not recognise his father,
and the pair had to speak through
an interpreter. Speaking of their
reunion Mr. Banda said, “He asked
me in English who I was and what
I do. When I told him, ‘I am your
daddy’ he looked surprised.”
Sadly, this is likely to be the case
with the majority of internationallyadopted children, if indeed they
actually have the chance of meeting
their families ever again. Yes, it
is true that most of the parents of
these orphans are probably happy
for their children to be adopted
by parents from another country.
But naturally, any parent would
sacrifice anything for their child to
be given the best chances in life, and
the parents of these children would
likewise no doubt give anything for
their child to make a better life for
themselves.
However, from a moral point
of view, and as Jane Moyo, of
ActionAid recently commented,
“If at all possible, a child should
remain in their own family and
community.” Therefore, would it
not be better for those who wish to
help the orphaned children of these
parts of the world, to support the
community of these children, and
instead invest their money into the
local agencies and charities that can
look after that child. At least in this
way the child would be brought
up in their own community, in the
same culture, and with any family
they might have living nearby. If
we work instead towards helping
these poorer parts of the world,
by investing money in bettering
their social systems, these families
could remain together. Instead of
improving one life, through the
adoption of one child, we would
be helping to improve the lives of
whole communities.
Furthermore, we must not forget
the high numbers of fostered and
orphaned children in our own
country. Is it right that parents
should be looking to adopt overseas
when there are children locally who
need loving homes and care?
Undeniably, this is a subject which
offers much room for debate, and
I am not trying to say that I am
staunchly opposed to the idea of
international adoption. I’m merely
trying to point out that while
international adoption has been
almost ‘glamorised’ by the likes of
celebrities such as Angelina Jolie
and Madonna, we must stop to
consider the moral issues involved
with such an emotional and cultural
change for a young and vulnerable
child.
Perhaps one good thing to have
come out of the media frenzy
surrounding Madonna’s efforts
to adopt little Mercy James is that
people have been made aware of
the necessity of providing help for
orphaned children across the world.
With any adoption, and especially
with overseas adoption, the child’s
best interests must be our number
one priority, and I think sometimes
this may not always be the case.
Should Boris Johnson be Prime Minister ?
SIMON CHILDS and OLI MICHELSON debate the pros and cons of Boris as PM and imagine what life would
be like with everyone’s favourite political liability holed up in Number 10.
NO
Simon Childs
B
oris Johnson as Mayor of
London makes me wince. The idea
of him leading the country makes
me want to cry.
As a Londoner I feel it is my
patriotic duty to warn the rest of the
country about what an utter boob he
is.
Boris plays up to his image as a
lovable Bertie Wooster style posh
boy, but he has a deeply sinister side
to him.
You have to question the moral
compass of a man who saw nothing
wrong with supplying an ex-etonian
school mate with the address of a
journalist so that he could be beaten
up. The only other people I can
think of who think it’s okay to be
complicit in violence are…Gordon
Brown and Tony Blair over Iraq, two
of the worst PMs ever.
Those who voted for him because
they thought that he would
put the fun back into London
(as if it ever went away) were
immediately disappointed when
he banned drinking on the London
Underground.
Does this sound like the act of
a libertarian bon viveur? “Never
mind, I’ll skip the tube and use my
bike”, I hear you say. Think again.
Although famous for using his
mobile phone, ignoring red lights
and not wearing a helmet on his
two-wheeler, Boris Johnson is no
friend of cyclists, cutting cycle lane
funding by two thirds.
He hasn’t endeared himself to
Scousers or people from Portsmouth
either. He has belittled these people,
before being sent, cap in hand, to
apologise by his embarrassed bosses
in a way reminiscent of David Brent
from The Office.
If he hasn’t insulted your city yet,
it’s probably because he hasn’t got
round to it, displaying that typical
London arrogance that you inbred
provincial types so despise. There
are other parallels with Brent: casual
racism for comic effect, incompetence
and being funny on TV.
The difference is that while Brent
is happy to run a fictitious branch
of a printing company in Slough,
Johnson, not content with bungling
the running of the capital, could end
up running a real country.
‘Cripes!’
YES
“I have as
much chance
of becoming Oli Michelson
Prime
Minister A
as of being
decapitated
by a frisbee
or of finding
Elvis”
Major of London
Boris Johnson
classicist, an intellectual, an
underestimated shrewd political
operator and occasional buffoon.
All of these attributes can be applied
to the current Mayor of London,
Boris Johnson, who was rumoured
this week to be considering to run
for Prime Minister, if needed.
When I first heard the news I
thought that someone was pulling
my leg, they couldn’t be serious.
Boris Johnson Prime Minister, that
could never happen.
But then I remembered that this
was the same reaction everyone had
last year when he announced that he
was running for Mayor of London,
and there he has not been a failure.
Far from it, he has survived his first
year of office with relatively few
scandals and a quiet success that has
shocked both sides of the bench.
Mr Johnson brings an allurement
to the political spectrum that
resembles that of President Sarkozy
of France and his supermodel bride.
Our Boris would seem next in line
as an idiosyncratic yet successful
politician, a man who would honour
his and the nation’s principles.
His principles, which stem from a
privileged classical education render
him more adept for politics than
most, in the opinion of this classicist
who believes that the influence of
Thucydides and Cicero in political
circles would improve the state of
the world.
The need for change which
championed Tony Blair’s push for
office would again assist Mr Johnson
in his vote for Prime Minister, as it
helped him turn Ken out of city hall.
Once there Mr Johnson’s thriving
passion for the promotion of the
pride he has for his country, recently
demonstrated by his support of the
London Olympic project and his
attempt to bring St George’s day
out of the shadows and alleviate
the racist and thuggish symbolism
evoked by the St George’s cross,
portrays the patriotic, strong and
proud leader that this country needs
in its hour of need; the recession.
I am left, pondering how one
cannot vote for or have confidence
in a man whose political aspirations
and ideals stem from the best the
world has ever offered, Pericles of
Athens.
10
COMMENT
[email protected]
4th May 2009
Talent or torture?
As Susan Boyle becomes an internet phenomenon SIMON MURPHY
questions whether Britain really does have talent.
S
usan Boyle – remember the
name, because no-one else will in
a year’s time.
You’d have had to have been
living on Mars to have missed
the attention of this 47-year-old
spinster who set pound signs
flashing in Simon Cowell’s eyes
last week.
That’s right folks; it’s that time of
year again! The Britain’s Got Talent
bandwagon has rolled into town
and this time the spotlight has
landed on the unlikeliest of targets
– a frumpy, middle-aged, Scottish
virgin.
That’s not to say she can’t hold
a tune. She amazed the judges,
singing I Dreamed a Dream from
Les Misérables. “When you came
on stage, everybody was laughing
at you” Piers Morgan told Boyle,
“nobody is laughing now”. That’s
not necessarily true, Piers.
The press have labelled her
a “hairy angel”, possessing
“eyebrows you could knit into a
jumper”. Hardly serious words of
praise. As Cowell told The Mirror:
“You don’t have to be a singer
who’s 47, who’s never been kissed,
with a cat, just somebody who says,
‘You know what? I think I could
win a competition and I think I am
talented and I don’t think people
are going to judge me because of
the way I look’.”
Hang on a minute Simon, aren’t
you famous for judging people by
the way they look?
The sad truth is, once the media
have had their fun – plucked her
from her four-bedroom council
house in West Loathian – they’ll
spit her straight back. At best, she
might live on in the minds of the
TV audience for a few months as
‘that fat middle-aged woman who
could hold a tune’.
If the Jeremy Kyle Show is – as
some people say – a modern form
of bearbaiting, then it is not unfair
to say that Britain’s Got Talent
amounts to a sort of medieval
public execution, albeit with Cowell
acting as the high executioner.
Send ‘em forward! Out march the
lambs for slaughter, and when the
crowd starts booing, down come
the judge’s hands – like razor sharp
guillotines – on their buzzers.
Fortunately, on the rare occasion
that a lamb does stumble forward
and is too cute for butchery, they’re
spared. But they can’t just be cute,
they must have touch of talent too
– it is Britain’s Got Talent after all.
“Piers Morgan
is holding his
head in his
hands ...you
can almost see
him smirking”
As was the case when 12-year-old
Shaheen Jafargholi stepped in front
of the judges, sporting that ‘little
boy lost’ face – you would have
been forgiven for thinking Amanda
Holden (or Madonna?) might rush
on stage and cradle the youngster
in her arms for the remainder of
the show. Another time maybe.
Before young Shaheen even gets
on stage though, the picture is set
firmly for us. He is – of course –
singing Amy Winehouse’s ‘Valerie’
because “My Grandad really loves
the song, so whenever I sing it, it
makes him really happy”. There’s
nothing like a bit of emotional
framework setting – and ITV
happens to specialise in it. Did I
mention that he’s been brought up
by his mum single-handedly? Oh,
and one more thing: she is “His
biggest fan”.
The whole thing is horribly
staged. The boy starts singing, and
the crowd start gently clapping
him on his way. Then, Cowell – as
if hit by some meteorite of artistic
vision – raises his hand. Naturally,
everything stops – this is Simon
Cowell we’re talking about. Is it
just me, or is it not that ludicrous
to imagine him doing the same
to the Queen while she’s making
her speech on Christmas Day? He
seems to be able to doing anything
these days.
“You’ve got this really wrong”
he tells the 12-year-old – who,
coincidently, looks like he may
burst into tears at any moment.
“What do you sing apart from
that?” demands the orange-faced
judge. “Who’s loving you? by
Michael Jackson” squeaks the little
boy. Piers Morgan is holding his
head in his hands at this point and
you can almost see him smirking.
“Do you want to give that a go?”
says Cowell, not so much asking a
question but ordering the child. Cue
new music – which is conveniently
close to hand – cue breath-taking
performance, cue orgasmic face
-making from Ms Holden. We’re
led to believe the whole audition
has been saved by Cowell’s genius
– what a sham.
And when Simon begins nodding
his head - like one of those useless
Churchill dogs – the picture is
complete. “This is how one song
can change your life. This may
be the start of something special”
proclaims the judge. “You have just
shown that Wales has got talent”
quips in Piers. “It doesn’t happen
to me very often, but I do the goose
bump test. I got it with Paul Potts,
I got it with George Sampson, and
I got it with you” finished Amanda
Holden.
Let’s not build up the Welsh
schoolboy’s hopes or anything remember, there’s a “hairy angel”
waiting in the wings.
Was Miss USA
candidate right to
speak out against
gay marriage?
SARAH SCOTT discusses the controversial gay
marriage rights in America
T
his year’s Miss USA pageant made
headlines across the world but not
because of any wardrobe malfunctions
or movie-styled moment in which the
winners crown explodes leaving the
runner up to snatch the title with a
smug grin on her face. No, the reason
for the extra column inches was because
one candidate dared to voice her own
opinion, a rarely observed practice at
this out-dated and chauvinistic event.
Carrie Prejean, the Miss California
representative, produced the most
controversial moment in the Miss USA
Contest when she answered a question
on gay marriage posed to her by
pageant judge Perez Hilton.
When asked whether she thought
gay marriage should be legalised in all
American states she stated, “We live in
a land where you can choose same-sex
marriage or opposite marriage,” Miss
Prejean said. “And you know what,
I think in my country, in my family,
I think that I believe that a marriage
should be between a man and a woman.
No offence to anybody out there, but
that’s how I was raised.”
Her response received both cheering
and booing from the audience and a
look of utter disbelief and disgust from
pageant judge Perez Hilton who is
openly gay and regularly updates his
popular blog with developments on
gay marriage in American states.
Prejean’s comments have been
deemed unwise in a competition
through which the winner is meant
to be a representative for the whole
of America and ultimately have been
blamed for her being passed over for
the crown and taking the role of runner
up.
Since the pageant a torrent of criticism
has been thrown at Miss California
with those arguing that she should
lose her title and people such as Perez
Hilton branding her a ‘dumb bitch’.
Miss California has spent her time
since the pageant defending her opinion
and standing by her anti-gay marriage
comments much to the continuing rage
of gay marriage activists and liberals.
However, should we really condemn
this girl for standing by her beliefs and
choosing to express them in a situation
in which she was under pressure to
supply a politically correct answer?
Yes she was naïve to believe that by
stating what she truly felt about this
issue she would walk away from the
situation without negative press and
with the crown. In fact it was a reckless
move and she was foolish to do so if
she truly wanted to win the crown.
Perez Hilton has reportedly said that
she gave the ‘wrong’ answer.
Gay marriage is a huge issue across
America today; there may be many
campaigning for gay marriage to be
legalised in American states, however,
the majority of Americans, including
the current democratic President
Barack Obama, believe that a marriage
should be between a man and a woman.
Therefore Miss California was simply
expressing the view of the majority of
Americans. I am torn as to whether
to believe she was extremely brave to
do what she did or again just stupidly
naïve.
One of the main questions brought
about by this controversy asks
whether it is fair for Christians, such
as Miss California, and traditionalists
to be labelled ‘bigots’ for their beliefs?
Marriage, as President Obama stated,
is a sacred union between a man and a
woman, it is a religious ceremony and
God is in the mix.
I pose the question, how is it bigoted
to believe that a marriage should be
between a man and a woman? It’s not
bigoted; it’s simply conventional, like
marriage itself. Here in the UK gay
marriage is not so much an issue as in
America. In 2005 the Civil Partnerships
Act was brought in which legalised
partnerships between same sex couples
in the UK.
Under the law couples who want
to form a partnership must register
their intentions with local councils but
unlike marriages the signing of the legal
partnership papers does not need to
happen in public. It has been suggested
that perhaps civil partnerships should
be enough for same sex couples as
marriage is a conventional institution
and same sex relationships are an
unconventional and relatively new
phenomenon.
I am not saying that I am against
gay marriage. I believe that everyone
should have equal rights and not be
afraid or be held back from being who
they are. Love is love. All I am saying
is that everyone should be entitled to
their own opinion on the subject, just
like everyone is entitled to be straight
or gay.
Only a handful of states in America
allow same sex marriage, civil
unions are recognised in others but
the majority of states still ban gay
marriage. In California, America’s most
populous state and the home of Carrie
Prejean, actually has the country’s most
colourful record on gay marriage.
The recent controversy surrounding
Miss California seems unfair in
my opinion. I believe in same sex
marriage or same sex civil unions
but I also believe that Christians and
traditionalists such as Miss California
are entitled to express their own
opinions on the issue.
In the context of the Miss USA Contest,
Miss Prejean was naïve to express her
true feelings in a competition which
seeks to find a politically correct puppet
to represent America.
However, is it really fair to make her
the poster girl for bigotry when what
she believes is that the traditional
institution of marriage should remain
between a man and a woman, as
convention dictates?
C
M
Y
K
INBOX
4th May 2009
11
[email protected]
The Courier 2008/9: a paper with front...
SEPTEMBER - Freshers’
Week 2008 special - new
style trialed for the first
time...
OCTOBER - Chancellor
puts foot in mouth over
top-up fees...
Dodgey ‘leading agency
employee’ tries to enter
student homes...
NOVEMBER - Professor
walks over stem-cell
research as ‘beautiful
bottom’ graces cover...
Student Support Officer
leads students in top-up
fees protest along the
Tyne...
Courier breaks news
on explusion of 50
international students...
Student ‘badly’ injured
in
hit-and-run...
important lessons in
fact-checking learnt...
DECEMBER - Metro
fares rise as delighted
editor interviews local
hero Peter Beardsley...
A landmark Courier
moment as investigation
into Walton Robinson
hits stands...
FEBRUARY - NUS
protesters storm stage
as Uni stuns world with
cow discovery...
Courier
echoes
newpapers across the
land with ‘look, it’s
snowed’ story...
Concerns over cannabis
use - meanwhile the
‘Gentleman
Ghost’
begins his short Courier
career...
APRIL - Report into NUS
after annual conference
splits political opinion...
MAY - Union centre of
national attention as
campus drug habits are
revealed...
Ancient wall discovered
on campus as Uni
prepares to defend Stan
Calvert trophy...
Obligatory library fines
story as Team Newcastle
celebrate
stuffing
Northumbria...
MARCH - 75% of
students
fulfill
all
expectations
and
admit to regular binge
drinking...
Sit-in protest disrupts
campus as next year’s
sabbatical team are
announced...
[email protected]
‘’ ...I think
everyone should
cut police officers
some slack...”
Dear Editor,
In response to “Manufacturing
Violence” in issue 1190
While I am heartened that the author
acknowledges the crucial role of the
media in stoking up tensions at the
G20 protests (something even our
supposedly independent media had
not the insight or perhaps courage
to do) I think everyone should cut
police officers some slack.
While I am, of course, as disgusted
as everyone else at tales of barbarism,
it must be remembered that they do
a very difficult job and that there are
some mitigating factors.
Firstly, in protests that were policed
well and drew no complaints, such
as the ‘Put the people First’ protest,
the organisers very responsibly
worked with the police to plan
routes and meeting points and
estimated numbers beforehand.
No such co-operation was made by
‘Meltdown’, the ‘four horsemen’
organisation calling for the downfall
of Capitalism.
With this lack of co-operation,
it firstly makes it very difficult to
know what to expect and to prepare
accordingly, and secondly leads to
the suspicion (backed up by a quick
glance at their website) that those
involved will be disruptive and
threatening towards the police in the
heat of the moment, if they will not
even deign to co-operate responsibly
before hand.
Secondly, with 20 world leaders
in London, any major breaches of
the peace would have been highly
embarrassing politically for this
government.
Therefore I am in doubt that the
police, accountable to a very troubled
Home Secretary would have been
told in no uncertain terms to give no
quarter to protesters.
Finally, in the cases where police
did use a regrettable amount of force
on individuals, it was never without
provocation.
The media focuses on the reaction,
not the previous events, but look
closely at the footage and you will
see them being sworn at/liquid and
other missiles thrown over them/
pushed about.
Isn’t it conceivable that if you
were in their shoes, and vastly
outnumbered, you would react
severely in order not to be seen as a
soft target for the (potential) mob?
And, let’s remember, that without
them there could have been violence
and vandalism on a very serious
scale. If the police had failed to
prevent that, can you imagine the
outcry?
Ross Dent
‘’ ...The article
was purile and
appeared as a
gradiose excuse
for swearing...”
Dear Editor,
I have been a regular reader of
‘The Courier’ since I first arrived at
university. I think it is a vehicle for
good, student journalism and its
content is appealing and interesting.
However,
the
content
of
‘Splurgings’, one of the columnist’s
sections, is somewhat anomalous
with my experience of the writing in
‘The Courier’. The most recent article
of note, and the catalyst for this letter,
was the piece done on ‘Chris Morris’
and a film on terrorism. I felt the
piece was insensitive and hyperbolic.
I feel the writer of ‘Splurgings’ has
missed the point and general feel of
inbox
the particular company of writers he
shares.
Although some of the articles in
‘Splurgings’ have been more subtle
and interesting than the piece I cite,
the lion’s share of his writing and
subject matter has been along the
trend of the article on ‘Chris Morris’,
this being somewhat purile and
appearing as a grandiose excuse for
swearing and infantile opinion. I am
not easily offended, and I am openminded to various levels of writing
and journalism, but the article I have
cited, amongst others, appear as
excessive and somewhat irrelevant
to the ‘columnist’ area of the paper
and the student community in
general. His assertion that terrorism
‘shouldn’t be taken so seriously’ for
example strikes me as intentionally
abrasive and unnecessary. The
general feel of the article was one of,
in my opinion, smugness and overt
antagonism. In fact, I’m not even
entirely sure what he was trying to
say.
Anon.
INTERVIEW
4th May 2009
13
[email protected]
The Courier catches up with Mistresses star Mark Umbers
completely unintelligible. I just had to walk
away. I was so embarrassed.
Betsy Powell
BP: Have you ever been chatted up by a
celebrity?
BP: You’ve recently finished filming the latest
series of Mistresses. Was that an enjoyable
experience for you?
MU: Not that I’m aware of. Scarlet was full of
chat up lines, but none of them were serious.
MU: Yeah it was really good fun. Obviously
filming a whole series was much more
strenuous than filming just one episode. It’s
like coming back with all your friends for the
first day of school; it’s a new start for everyone.
There was far too much giggling.
BP: Your latest project is “The Winter’s
Tale”. You seem to be taking a more mature
role; do you think this is a shift in the type of
characters you play?
MU: It is definitely a more mature role. I have
always loved the play, and the happy ending is
quite rare for a Shakespeare play. The ending
has been tweaked a bit in this version as well.
BP: Your character was involved in a
complicated love-triangle, how was that to
film?
BP: Why did you choose to take on a
Shakespeare play? Surely he is one of the
most intimidating authors to take on.
MU: It was actually really segmented. It’s not
like performing in the theatre where the plot
is laid out in chronological order. The shoot
lasted three months, with one month spent
on every two episodes. It’s pretty easy to lose
track of the plot.
BP: Will you be coming back for another
series of Mistresses?
MU: I don’t find his work in the least bit
intimidating. I studied Latin for years, and I
find that helps me understand Shakespeare
a lot more. Naturally people worry about
adapting play for a modern audience, but it’s
impossible to be completely purist.
MU: I’m not sure if a third series has been given
the go ahead yet. If it is then I would be more
than happy to be involved in it.
BP: You have recently been screenwriting.
Is this a direction you would like to pursue
further?
BP: What was it like working with Scarlett
Johansson? There’s quite an age gap between
the two of you. Was it an awkward experience
considering her cult Hollywood status?
MU: I have always writing for fun and just for
my own enjoyment. As an actor, I get a lot of
downtime and it’s good to have something to
do other than going to the gym.
MU: That was a very strange job, and was the
first time I’d been given the leading role in a
movie which was pretty scary. Scarlett wasn’t
really famous when I worked with her, and if
I’m honest I didn’t know who she was. It’s been
really strange watching her hit the big time; I
mean she’s a global superstar now. She was
just an ordinary teenager, very normal, well as
normal as you can be as an actor! She did keep
reminding me of the age gap; I just had to try
really hard not to think about it. She was very
grown up and professional and not a glamour
puss at all; very bright and funny. The best
words to describe her are kooky and eccentric I
think. Stick a camera on her and you can’t help
but want to watch. I also worked with Helen
Hunt. To work with an Oscar winner like here
was terrifying. She was completely different to
Scarlett, very reserved and intelligent.
BP: What would your dream role be?
MU: I would like to do more theatre, Tennessee
Williams would be great. I love the language,
and the messy nature of the characters. There
is a lot for an actor to play with. I would also
jump at the chance to play an American, it’s
too easy just to play English characters. I’d also
like to do more Shakespeare while I’m always
up for tackling more obscure roles.
BP: Do you have any advice to give to aspiring
actors?
MU: You need to make sure that acting is
what you really want to do. You need to have
something as a backup that doesn’t depress
you. Acting is a really tough career choice. You
need to be able to cope with long periods of
unemployment, and possible setbacks.
BP: You’ve stated previously that you often
get cast in period dramas and are made to
seem younger than you are. Why do you
think this is?
BP: If you could have a dinner party with five
people, alive or dead, who would you choose
and why?
MU: I think I’ve got that sort of face and look for
period drama. As for seeming younger than I
am, I think that is just because on stage you are
much further away from the audience!
MU: I would pick Germaine Greer, she’s very
entertaining, and Shakespeare so that I could
test him on his plays. Puccini would be good
as would the fab Juliet Binoche. I’d have to
invite Alfred Hitchbook as well, just for that
tension with Greer!
BP: Have you always wanted to be an actor?
MU: I think I was about 15 or 16 when I realised
that I wanted to do it professionally.
BP: When did you realise you’d “made it”?
MU: I’m really proud of what I have achieved,
but you can never really relax. I wouldn’t say
you ever feel like you’ve made it.
BP: What do you think you would be doing if
BP: Sum yourself up in less than ten words.
MU: I think too much.
you hadn’t made it as an actor?
MU: I think I would like to have still been
involved in the industry in some form, maybe
as a writer.
BP: Do you ever get star struck?
MU: The honest answer is yes! It’s always
with people you’re not working with. I wasn’t
fazed by Lauren Bacall for instance. During
filming of the Merchant of Venice I could see
Emma Thompson and Imelda Staunton. I
tried to speak to them but what came out was
BP: What is your Favourite film?
MU: I reckon that would have to be The Life
and Death of Colenel Blimp.
MANIFESTOS
15
[email protected]
4th May 2009
Time to make
your vote
count again!
The time has come once again to
elect your Union Officers for the next
academic year.
These are the part-time positions that
were not filled during the last round
officer elections. The positions are as
follows:
- Gender Equality Officer
- Convenor of Disciplinary
- Racial Equality Officer
- Officer without Portfolio
- Community Officer
Voting will open on Tuesday 5th May
at 9am and last until 3pm Thursday
7th May. You can vote for any of the
candidates (or RON!) at vote.ncl.ac.uk
during this period.
To help you make up you mind, all
candidates will be participating in
‘husting’ - a public Q&A session on
their manifestos and plans if they win
their positions - at 1pm on Tuesday 5th
May outside of the Union.
Gender Equality Officer
Convenor of Disciplinary
Elizabeth Clegg
Deborah Smith
Sam Nutter
My name is Elizabeth
Clegg and I am running
for the position of
gender equality officer
in the Union elections.
Hi, I’m Deborah and
I’m running for Gender
Equality Officer. I’m a
mature student and I am
passionate about gender
equality issues.
Vote SAM NUTTER
for
Convenor of Disciplinary
Committee!
In a recent survey, over
a quarter of women
reported that at times
they felt unequal to
men at work, and
this highlights how
inequality between the sexes is still a problem,
even in today’s modern society. Conversely,
the fight for paternal rights shows how men
can also be discriminated against. Gender
inequality within the university is still an issue,
and discrimination based on sex cannot be
tolerated.
As gender equality
officer I would make
myself
accessible
to
students
with
suggestions or queries
about gender equality issues and offer support
to those who need it. I would also be pro-active
in
campaigning on issues such as violence against
women, paternity rights, the neglected issue
of men’s mental health, the objectification of
women and many more. I would like to work
closely with groups such as the Women’s
If elected, I will endeavour to continue the Society and Newcastle Women’s Collective, as
work of Eva, the current officer, in promoting well as with local charities.
gender equality.
As well as being passionate about gender
I will:
equality issues, I have the necessary experience
to enable me to provide real results. I have
• Work with other liberation officers to combat attended a three day
National Student’s
discrimination on all levels
Union Conference, women’s rights workshops
• Promote awareness through campaigns and and a government consultation on violence
speakers
against women. I have also recently been
• Recognise the importance of International working with the union on issues regarding
Women’s day and organise events to promote student carers, which has included compiling a
the empowerment of women
questionnaire and setting up a student forum.
• Work with clubs and societies to ensure
gender equality is promoted throughout the I feel strongly that equality is a basic right for
university
men and women and I know that, as gender
equality
Both men and women need to feel that they are officer, I could make a real difference to the
not being discriminated against because of their university.
gender. I hope to represent male, female and
transgender individuals in the promotion of
gender equality. Sexual discrimination cannot
and should not be tolerated.
Racial Equality Officer
Officer without Portfolio
Community Officer
Jeremy Mason
Chloe Mortimer
David Hickling
Hi, my name is Jeremy
Mason and I’m running
for the position of racial
equality officer. Coming
from a multi cultural
background I understand
the true importance of
tolerance.
Hi, I’m Chloe, a first
year history student
and I’m running for
executive officer (without
portfolio).
Hello Everyone! I’m Dave
and standing to be your
Community Officer.
As we have seen with
the recent commotion
from the BNP and others,
racism is unfortunately still a part of modern
day society and I will persevere on behalf of all
students of the university to put racial equality
back on to the agenda. I want to represent those
discriminated against to ensure that racism is
not tolerated in any form and actions are taken
when it arises.
If elected, I will;
• Endeavour to promote awareness and
involvement campaigns on campus including
the love music hate racism movement and
make certain these events are a regular feature
within the academic calendar.
• Ensure that all clubs and societies are up to
speed on the issue of racial equality, and make
sure that an equal number of participation
opportunities are available for all.
• Work closely with the other liberation officers
to tackle discrimination on all levels within the
university and the union society.
I believe, above all, that everybody has the
right to live their life without suffering through
prejudice.
I’m really concerned
about recent student
apathy and the underuse
of the fantastic services
and events the union has
to offer.
As executive officer I feel that I would be in a
fantastic position to address these issues.
I hope to do this by:
• Promoting and raising awareness of the union
services and events
• Ensuring the new generation of students get
involved with all the union has to offer
• Offering support to other part time and
sabbatical officers with organising and
promoting their events and campaigns
• Always being available and open for
discussion and ideas anyone has about events,
campaigning or generally ensuring the union is
used fully and help in any way I can
As you know, Newcastle
University is one of the
best academic institutions
in the country (that is,
of course, why you’re
here!) However, there
are times when students
like you fall victim to wrong-doings committed
by others through bodily-harm, theft and antisocial behaviour. Such things need a response.
Why should you vote for me (especially with
my silly name)?
As Convenor I would:
- Be a readily available link for students to the
Disciplinary Committee.
-Make sure that our University remains a safe
place to be.
- Ensure all cases remain confidential and are
treated with fairness and understanding.
- Promote student-awareness about the
Committee and its purpose.
-Encourage, listen to and act upon suggestions
from students.
- Maintain beneficial links with local
authorities.
Positions I hold:
-Fresher’s Week Crew (2008-9/2009-10) & RAG
Week (2009).
-Student Ambassador.
- Staff-Student Representative.
- Member of Amnesty International.
- Active member of Newcastle Officer Training
Corps with links to the Army Legal Service.
I hope that my experience and enthusiasm
convinces you to vote for me, after all...
I’ll be working for your welfare so you can
work hard and player harder.
By voting for me you
will be electing a fresh,
dynamic and dedicated
candidate.
As President of the
Labour Society this year
I have learnt a lot about
our University, our student communities and
the city we inhabit – and I’m eager to find out
more!
I will work hard to make sure our rights are
adhered to when it comes to housing, travel and
students needs and concerns. I will encourage
more engagement between students and their
communities by attempting to widely publish
community news and events.
I believe the values I hold as a Labour student
make me well suited to be your representative
in the community. Values like fairness,
opportunity and a strong desire to see no-one
left behind or have their views excluded or
ignored.
I really hope to reverse the disenchantment
some students have found themselves in with
the union.
We students are an integral part in the make-up
of this fine city and more often than not I feel
we deserve a bigger and better voice.
My
successful
fundraising
experience,
organisational skills, friendly and approachable
manner and most importantly my passion and
enthusiasm to make a positive difference to the
student experience means that I know I will be
able to make an impact on the union.
I WILL PROVIDE THAT VOICE.
Vote David Hickling!
Who is RON...?
When you come to vote in any of the elections,
you’ll notice a mysterious candidate named
RON is there also asking for your vote.
RON is not the mascot of that certain multinational conglomerate, nor is he a real person
who has decided not to submit a photo or a
manifesto.
RON stands for Re-Open Nominations.
If it so happens that you do not want any
of the prospective candidates to be elected
into a position, you can vote to RON. In the
event that RON has more votes than any of
the other candidates, the election will be run
again at a later date, meaning that other people
not previously nominated can now become
candidates.
RON is also useful if you do not have a second
preference, for example, if there are two
candidates in the election and you’d rather the
election be re-run if your favourite does not
get in.
Basically, RON is your get out clause. It’s not
used very often but if you feel strongly enough
then do it.
Remember: it’s your right to RON!
features
North by South
Alice Vincent
I
t’s quite, quite frightening to think that
17 weeks of naive southern pondering on
the ‘Northern Wilds’ (quote from fellow
southerner) of Newcastle have flown by
and whoops, suddenly, this is the final
entry. What’s more terrifying, however,
is that I’ve been able to squidge over 18
months of Geordie life into 17 issues, and
now have to construct another to top it
all off.
Thing is, I could well continue the ramblings of the last entries. A weird Geordie gypsy woman came into the shop I
worked in last week and told both my
boss and I off for our shopkeeping habits, complete with finger-wagging. There
was also the National Front North rally
round monument a couple Thursdays
ago for St. George’s day which certainly
raised my southern eyebrows and caused
a couple of thoughts about Geordies having any excuse for a drink.
I can’t help but feel a bit like I’d be going over old ground though. I think I’ve
covered old women (ad nauseam, in fact,
people might be starting to worry I’m a
geriphile) and Geordie drinking has not
only been reported upon but is a given
stereotype.
Instead, I’d got thinking on to what extent I was still a pariah in this town after
over a year of intensive Geordie analysis.
Newcastle is a massive student town,
there’s no denying it, but the division
between locals and Geordies is painfully apparent. If you think the flyerers on
Northumberland Street are highly skilled
at tackling you, you’re wrong. Even if
you’re not carrying books, wearing a
society hoodie or clutching a Starbucks,
students just stick out like sore thumbs.
It’s like that KFC ‘matted fur’ advert, but
with uglier models.
I still get flyered on Northumberland
Street, so I too must reek of student. Yet
I can’t help observing that, outside of the
North-East, I become an ersatz-Geordie.
Sadly, my Geordie accent is yet to be
plausible, and comes out in a mixture of
Welsh and Scottish, but I can now tell the
difference between Mackem (of Sunderland and Kate Adie fame) and Geordie,
and translation of taxi-driver dialect is
also improving.
Accent aside, I find myself nattering away
about this fair city possibly more than
my university experience to my ‘Shire
friends. When the North-East heat of The
Great British Menu was on for a week on
channel two I was hooked, engaging in
the debate about whether pease pudding
should be hot or cold. When Kirstie and
Phil did Location, Location, Location just
off Osbourne Road my heart raced a little. I’m so chuffed to have the opportunity of living here. Not because of the £2
trebles, not because of the infamy of Bigg
Market, and not because I used to live
near St. James’s Park; but because it’s an
amazing city.
I’ve always reckoned Newcastle’s a little
like Cornwall in the sense that it seems
like another country separate from England, and that’s due to the stuff that isn’t
a strict Geordie stereotype. It’s the stuff
that you’ve actually got to step off the
beaten path of campus, Northumberland
Street, Jesmond to find to discover. Armstrong Park in Heaton is just as pretty,
if not nicer for a wander round, than
Jesmond Dene, there are some amazing
pubs in Ouseburn Valley and finding
myself in Whitley Bay after I started off
in Tynemouth was eye-opening.
It’s so easy to get stuck into a routine, but
figure out just how much you’re missing
by trying the same clubs,
the same parks, the
same shops in a
city that’s much,
much bigger than
it seems. You’re
here for three
years, get to
know it.
Battle of the Sexes
This week: Sex Positions
Katherine Bannon
likes ‘missonary’
as the unfailing
provider of a stable
base for a variety
of toppings:
Sexual Positions: the ultimate form
of female subordination or feminine
kicks?
Let’s jump straight in the deep end:
the doggie, most frequent favourite
of ‘More’ magazine’s ‘we’ll tell
the whole world about our sex life
because our friends no longer listen’
page.
It’s labelled the epitome of male
power, the rough-and-ready, down
-to-business manifestation of animal
instincts which recognises who’s
really got control of the leash.
However, although girls are
inclined to a bit of heavy petting,
to be following the lead of the local
park’s most regular visitors tends to
take the biscuit.
But we’ll give them their due.
When you’ve both had one past onetoo-many and getting the soldier to
stand up straight is proving difficult
enough, neither of you are going
to be competing in the pretzelimitation stakes.
So in moves the fail safe, card of
never-ending reliability, margarita
of sex: the missionary. So simple it’s
only Will from The Inbetweeners
who doesn’t manage to pull it off.
However, possession of the much
fought badge of who can achieve an
orgasm with least amount of effort is
in continuous play here, for despite
many frantic minutes of up and
under jostling it’s quite inevitable
where you’ll end up: on top.
Why should we be the ones to
succumb to thigh cramp and tummytensing as they achieve maximum
satisfaction through the minimal
exertion of lifting their pelvis a few
millimetres of the mattress?
However, the main appeal
of the missionary comes from
its adaptability. Whether it’s
backwards, forwards, standing up
or upside down it never fails to
provide a staple base for a variety of
toppings.
Even if, yet again, you’re forced
to do the bouncing, the lack of eyeto-eye contact makes the reverse
cowgirl the perfect choice for one
night stands.
Sorry guys, but it’s bad enough
having to delete multiple Facebook
photos without the worry that we
might actually recognise you in the
library.
Against a wall also proves a
favourite in this situation, mainly
because trusting the bed sheets to be
clean is just far too presumptuous.
In terms of the more audacious
of adventures furniture fetishes
feature prominently amongst the
males of the species. Although on
these occasions long lost chivalry
is reincarnated as we’re offered the
downstairs room for a change; cold
leather couches, glass surfaces and
laminate flooring are ours for the
taking even if they don’t plan on
generating enough heat to spark a
match. Why do we put up with it?
Because we love it really.
Oliver Van Der
Gill takes one
key factor into
account: whether
or not you want
to see her face:
Sexual gymnastics embraces a
broad range of male preferences.
At the extreme there is the SAS man
of sex, Kama Sutra-extraordinaire
Sting.
This man heroically defies climax
through acrobatic missions of
knotty nookie leaving him quite
literally with a sting in his tail.
Then there is the man of more
simple tastes. The seasoned man of
the nightclub queue who shouts,
“I’d give her one!”.
As a man with a pro-active
pecker, here’s my two cents worth
on the ‘ins and outs’ of sexual
satisfaction.
At base, there is only one factor
that determines how you get it on;
whether or not you want to see her
face.
Orgasm for men is not dependent
on elaborate positions; it can be as
easy as riding a bike.
Some men, however, want to take
their bike on a more exhilarating
ride.
Enter Olga in my eye-opening,
nut-cracking summer of Swedish
lovin’. Olga was not called Olga;
she had a confusing name like an
Ikea flat-pack, but was a hippy
into Yoga and free love.
When I followed her on a Thai
retreat she mistook me as a guy
into ginseng and pandas and not
the loveable prick I really am.
Olga took to me like a duck to
water and took me places I had
never been. Upside down, behind,
in side out, diagonal, inverted,
upturned, reversed; sex with Olga
was like sweaty yoga that involved
your genitals.
On occasion, the Swede also bit
me. We’re not talking a wee nibble
but the bite of an Alsatian.
Sex became more extreme. I like
my man to go in, have fun and
come out relatively unharmed;
Olga always risked putting a kink
in my tail.
I also felt like the campest man in
the world. No bloke wants to hear
‘come into my lotus’ at the vital
moment.
After
numerous
positions
involving flowers, butterflies and
salutations my manhood had
distinctly diminished.
I throbbed for the days of
positions that had the masculinity
of a spirit level and not of spiritual
understanding.
When it gets down to it, having
sex with a crab is also pretty
unattractive (not to be mistaken
with the girl with crabs, another
summer story).
Even though the Kama Sutra is
not all its cracked up to be, I’m not
slamming creativity in sex.
My creative is missionary on my
car bonnet, doggy with the blinds
open, perhaps a cheeky blowjob in
the library.
HOW TO: Survive Graduation
Steve Robson presents you with five useful and five not-so-useful tips to life after
university. Gulp!
For those of us unfortunate souls in
final year there is a nagging feeling
in our stomachs preventing us from
enjoying the frivolity of the final
term.
We are slowly coming to terms
with the fact that this will be our last.
Not only do we have to cope with
the trauma of leaving behind our
beloved University, but we must face
up to life in the ‘Real’ world.
No more scrounging off the state
for low interest loans, sleeping in till
midday 5 days a week or drinking
till the sun comes up. No – the end
is nigh.
Here I will attempt to guide
you through this painful process.
Though I do not profess to have all
the answers, I hope that some of the
advice which has been directed my
way may well help those in a similar
predicament:
In all seriousness, for those out
there who, like me, don’t have much
of a clue where they’re going in life
come June, all I can say is try and
stay positive. It may not be easy
when you’re graduating into the
worst recession since 1945 but keep
going and something will turn up.
Don’t expect everything to fall into
place for you, or that it will happen
straight away. But if you persevere
the rewards will come – or so
everyone keeps telling me.
THE USEFUL...
eers
see the Car
1. Go and ! – If you haven’t
ly be
Service . . Now
would probab
already, now to visit the Careers
a good time e 2nd Floor of the
Service on th ilding.
Armstrong Buen Mon-Thu 10-5
Here
They’re op
on Fridays.
and 10-4.30 nd help aplenty,
fi
ific
you will
Advisers spec
with Careersol (see the website
to your scho V advisers and the
for details), C up team.
business start-
ersonal
to your P
2. Speak should know you
ey
Tutor – Th anyone else - having
an
th
r
te
ng you.
et
b
years meeti
spent three
3. Make an Action Plan – Sit
down and seriously think about
what you want and how you
need to get there.
Make a list of all your options
and then try and rate them out
of 10. It sounds simple but it
might actually make you realise
what you do, and definitely do
not want to pursue.
4. Get you
r CV and co
letter in ord
vering
fine tuning er – A day spent
y
o
u
r
CV and do
a template
ing
is certainly for a covering letter
not wasted
.
The gover
graduates nment website for
w
ww.p
ac.uk has so
me good adrospects.
vice.
5. Start regi
recruitment agen stering with
a ridiculous amoucies – there are
out there and man nt of agencies
particular sectors y specialise in
uploading your so it’s worth
and wait for emplCV with them
oyers to come
to you!
A good place to
agencycentral.co.ustart is www.
k
THE NOT-SOUSEFUL...
the rest
1. Keep studying for nothing
s
re’
the
–
of my life
another
stopping me doing at least
degree is there?! Or a Masters
carrying on and doing useful or
whether it’s actually
not.
2. Go and live in a New Age
commune – it was all the rage
back in the 90s.
3. Work
actually I thin Telesales – No
it all and k ink I’d rather end
resort to th ill myself before I
at.
tals in
4. Go and build hospi ritable
cha
h
suc
er
oth
Africa – or
g” not
work. It’s about “givin about
od
go
l
fee
me
g
kin
ma
myself . . Honest.
5. Sign on – Seems
great laugh on Shamlike a
doesn’t it?! All I need eless
to do is
have a few illegitimate
and they’ll give me a Co kids
house. Mind you, I’muncil
not
a massive fan of
Brew and that seems Special
to be a
prerequisite.
C
M
Y
K
FEATURES
17
[email protected]
4th May 2009
The Lazy Student’s
By Caroline Bass
Guide
to...
and Danya Bazaraa
THE WAR IN DARFUR
With the origins beginning back in February 2003, the war
in Darfur has once again been made the focus of mass media
attention. This is due to an arrest warrant recently being
issued to President Omar Al-Bashir on the grounds of crimes
against humanity and war crimes under Article 7 and 8 of
the Rome Statute.
The very nature of the difficulties in Darfur makes it
incredibly difficult to come to an objective conclusion on the
matter. Conclusions will vary dramatically depending on
what source you read and where that source has come from.
Tune into the BBC and be exposed to Western allegations
as extreme as genocide, yet flick the TV channel across to
Al Jazeera and see crowds of people flooding the streets of
Khartoum to welcome and support their president back into
Sudan.
How can these two opposing viewpoints be reconciled?
The objective of this guide is not to fall down too heavily on
either side, but just to offer insight into why the war came
about in the first place, how it has progressed over the years,
and what the current situation is today.
Covering an area of approximately one million square
miles, the Republic of Sudan is the largest African country
and the tenth largest country in the world. Darfur, a region
situated on the West border of Sudan spreads across some
493,180 square kilometres- which is approximately the size
of France.
With around six million inhabitants, Darfur comprises one
seventh of Sudan’s total population. In the early 1990s, Darfur
was divided into three states- West Darfur, South Darfur and
North Darfur. Since 2003, the region has remained in a state
of humanitarian emergency.
The Origins Of The Conflict...
We have to identify that there is unquestionably a problem
in Darfur. To put it simply, this problem is one of poverty,
underdevelopment and fighting between tribes.
The following analysis provided by the UN media service
objectively sums up the causes of the present crisis in Darfur:
‘The conflict pits farming communities against nomads who
have aligned themselves with the militia groups - in stiff
competition for land and resources.
The militias, known as the Janjaweed, attack in large
numbers and are driving the farmers away from their land.’
Wars with similar origins had raged previously in the
South of Sudan, but were resolved with little intervention or
international media coverage.
The key question therefore seems to be less to do with
the actual source of the conflict, and more to do with how
these low-intensity conflicts were transformed into a wellorganised and well-equipped civil war. A war that has
become of great international interest.
The Effects Of The Conflict...
There are many estimates of casualties, and seem to be
discrepancies between the statistics put forward by the Sudanese
government and those provided by the UN and other Western
organisations. According to Sudanese authorities, approximately
nine thousand people have been killed since the troubles began.
However, some non-governmental organisations estimate
figures as high as 200,000 and in some cases up to and beyond
500,000. The difficulties with finding accurate mortality and
casualty rates has been explained by some Western authorities
by the restrictions placed on journalists by the Sudanese
governments.
This however contradicts with claims that dozens of foreign
reporters have been allowed access into the region throughout
the crisis- with some taking up residency for several weeks at
a time.
Janjaweed, Sudanese militia, fight to keep farmers from their land.
Attempts Towards Peace...
Since 2003, the Sudanese government have continued to
declare its commitment to resolving the crisis. Attempts
to resolve the conflict have been on both domestic and
international levels. At a summit in June 2004 with nine
African presidents in attendance, Bashir once again
declared his wish to end the conflict in Darfur- ‘We are
committed and determined to resolving the current
conflict in Darfur in Western Sudan’.
The same message was made clear during the third
round of African union mediated Darfur peace talks
held in Abuja, Nigeria. Even the United Nations, in the
past, have noted the government’s strong commitment to
securing peace.
If this is the case, then the question remains- why is it
that five years on we are no closer towards a peaceful
settlement? Some reports suggest that the main problem
lies with whether the rebels themselves actually want this
war to end. Claims are backed up by the difficulty with
which the political demands of the rebels can be defined.
External Involvement In The Darfur Conflict...
President Bashir, determined to resolve the conflict in Dafur
The crisis seems to have dramatically worsened at the hand
of outside assistance and intervention. Support continues
from surrounding African countries such as Chad, and
from further afield – for example France and the US.
Just as the government was engaging in peace talks in
Al Doha- the ICC issued the arrest warrant to President
Al-Bashir. This raised the question about the wisdom of
issuing such an order at the time when opposing parts
were in peace talks and has potentially made the rebels yet
more resistant to peace.
In a situation where nothing is certain, and the truth is
difficult to discern, there is no straightforward solution to
the problem. However, surely if the effort and cash spent
on fuelling this war went instead on developing Darfur, it
is possible that peace would follow.
19
[email protected]
FEATURES
4th May 2009
Tips for surviving this summer’s festivals Splurgings
by Jane McFarland
Tip No.1
Invest in a good tent. Not
necessarily a ‘Built for Everest’ type
construction, but something capable
of withstanding rain/wind/hail.
When it comes to erection, choose
flat, preferably high ground, away
from portaloos and rivers.
Tip No.4
I’ve found a hipflask increasingly
useful for sneaking in booze past
security. If you are driving to the
festival stock up on as much alcohol
as you can and transfer into plastic
bottles. Amongst the bottles of
alcohol, stick in some water ‘cos after
heavy nights H2O will go down a
treat and there are usually water taps
round the campsite for re-fills.
Tip No.2
Wellies. Throw in some shitty
trainers in case the sun shines but
otherwise, pack the Hunters and lots
of socks. See how Kate et al work the
look. Don’t attempt ‘festival chic’what you need is plenty of layered
clothing and some sort of lightweight
waterproof number; ‘pac-a-mac type’
Have
some
cash
handy.
Withdrawal
machines
are
notoriously faulty with constantly
long queues.
Tip No.3
Tip No. 6
After 3 days of heavy drinking,
smoking and minimal snooze,
sunglasses cover a multitude of
sins. And everyone looks way fitter
when donning some wayfarers/
aviators so the chances of pulling
are better.
This brings me to my next tip –
enjoy the music. While the whole
camping/getting pissed experience
is memorable, my best recollections
are singing my heart out to
Oasis, swaying with the crowd
to Sigur Ros and getting down
in the dance tent to Hot Chip.
Tip No. 9
Tip No.7
Miscellaneous items include toilet
roll, bin bags, condoms, facewipes, chewing gum, paracetamol,
string and duct tape (good for tent
repairs once some drunken lout
falls into yours). Some people like
to take ear plugs, a night mask and
an inflatable travel pillow to help
them sleep. Others take booze and
drugs. Either way - catching some
zzz helps you dance longer the
next day.
Tip No. 5
Don’t forget to pack a torch as
sometimes trying to spot your tent
amongst the thousands as you
stumble home in the middle of the
night can be difficult. Some stick
flagpoles or signs on their abodes
so they stand out from the crowd.
Tip No. 10
Snap away with a camera. While
there is a high risk of loss/water
damage, the photos will provide
ample evidence and laughs for
months to come!
Tip No.8
I recommend cereal bars, nuts,
biscuits and fruit for snacks.
If you aren’t heading into
the music site until later
in the day, it is handy
having some nibbles
about and will save
some cash. Just
remember
no
bananas, meat
or cheese.
How to run an Eco Friendly Home
by Katherine Bishop
The phrase ‘eco friendly home’ has
become confused and overused in the
past few years. Its meaning has been
lost in translation.
Unfortunately, some people believe
that making changes in the household
will fail to remedy our current
environmental situation. What’s the
point of turning off my light when
developing countries are polluting at
a rate of knots? This may be true to a
degree, but is slightly defeatist.
Ethical living is far simpler, and far
more sustainable than many wish
to believe. The best bit? It doesn’t
deplete your bank balance, but saves
you a few extra pennies.
The simplest place to start making
a difference within your home is
the bathroom. Water shortages are
becoming one of the most widely
documented environmental issues,
and it is estimated at least two billion
people cannot rely on adequate water
supplies to drink, clean and cook
with.
If that appalling statistic is not
enough to shock you into conserving
water, then the rapidly diminishing
water supplies in rich, Westernised
countries, such as Australia and the
US, may spur you into turning off
the tap when brushing your teeth.
Amazingly, letting the tap run
continuously while polishing your
nashers can waste water equivalent to
the advised eight glasses you should
drink daily.
Another
effective
way
of
greener living is swapping your
environmentally harmful cleaning
equipment with non-biological, ecospecific products. Non-bio detergents
reduce the serious detrimental effects
caused by biological substances upon
natural eco-systems. Many larger
supermarkets have introduced their
own brand of eco-products.
At reasonable prices, this busts the
old wives’ tale that eco-products are
horribly expensive. Company EcoVer
is the world’s largest producer of ecofriendly cleaning products, and their
product prices begin at just £1.29.
Scientist Allen Hershkowitz recently
criticized the production of luxury
toilet roll as “one of the greatest
excesses of our age.” Replacing your
extra-soft, multi-ply toilet paper with
recycled bog roll significantly reduces
the huge ecological consequences
caused by the harmful chemicals
emitted during pulp manufacture.
Knowing that you’re helping to save
the world should make up for that
burning ring of fire every once in a
while.
A further easy, everyday method
that will cut down on excessive
waste is replacing regular lights with
energy-saving bulbs, but if you can’t
afford to switch then turning off
lights when they aren’t in use is just
as efficient. Also, turning your oven
off 15 minutes short of your cooking
time still efficiently cooks your food,
while saving energy in the process.
And if you’re cold, DON’T reach for
that thermostat! My mum’s favourite
response? ‘Put on another jumper!’
My boyfriend’s favourite response?
Jump into bed for a natural central
heating boost and get your freak on
for some entertainment – I’m not
guaranteeing it’ll be electricity free,
though.
Perhaps leading a more simple and
ethical lifestyle, and chanting ‘every
little helps’ once in a while, isn’t such
a bad thing after all. Try it.
Eskimo-rollin’ with Canoe and Kayak Soc
by Jessica Hart
I love being in water.
As in, I really like to swim. But
before I met Mark Pooleman,
president of the Canoe and Kayaking
Club, I was sat on Wikipedia trying
to distinguish the difference between
a canoe and a kayak. Hands up, I was
that ignorant. Turns out, for those of
you equally unaware, that a kayak
is a one person boat with paddles at
both ends of the ore, where a canoe
has a paddle at just one end and is
a team sport, generally considered
more prestigious. Canoeing is more
difficult, according to Mark, but
Kayaking more fun, and having been
involved in both for nine years; I am
willing to take his word for it.
Upon discovering the requirement
to join the club is merely the ability
to swim 25meters, and bearing in
mind I am a proud owner of no less
than a 200meters badge, I quickly
realised even I could join. Having
pointed this out, I was met with the
response that you shouldn’t need to
swim; you should stay in the boat.
The membership, an ideal number of
around 85, consists equally of males
and females, with varying levels
of experience within the club- the
more experienced members teach
the beginners and bring them up
to standard. Training consists of
weekly pool sessions at Fenham,
where you’re taught how to avoid
going topsy turvey, and if it happens,
how to right yourself... the rather
cumbersome eskimo roll. When not
in the pool you can chill in the sauna
or steam room and “catch up on
Wednesday night’s gossip”.
Almost every other weekend is a
river trip for the beginners as well as
the experienced, armed with vans full
of kayaks, masses of food and around
50 members, a bunkhouse is hired
and a weekend of amusement is on
the cards. The main focus of the club
is weekends away, with emphasis
on the social aspect. The club isn’t
majorly competitive, but they enter
competitions for funding, and won
a BUCS competition at the start of
February. Having had images of
numerous training sessions and little
actual activity, the reality is there is
huge potential to get out there and
properly try the sport.
I am still slightly horrified at the
idea of being capsized under water
and being unable to “roll myself up”,
but I am assured that you would
be unlikely to meet your end at the
hands of a kayak. I am told casualties
are few. Phew. The more experienced
you are, the smaller the cockpit,
therefore you could probably fit
a baby elephant in the kayaks for
beginners, the idea being that when
all is going to plan you use your legs to
keep you in the boat. With experience
and the smaller cockpit you are able
to do more tricks as can have more
control of the kayak. This took Mark
to Uganda and Canada over the past
two years, tackling huge drops and
waterfalls. These opportunities are
open to anyone who is willing to
give it a go, with individual groups
planning trips to places such as The
Alps.
A visit to The Lake District is all
that’s left this academic year, where
Mark will hand the club over to the
new president. He wants the club to
maintain its current standard and has
loved being president, so much so
that he intends to continue helping
out after his degree. Initially, having
admittedly aired on the dubious side,
I’ve realised the social, not to mention
the physical, benefits of joining the
canoe club. At £25, the membership
fee’s a bargain.
Tom Ford
“Y
ou remember when we
had this many friends?” was the
nostalgic comment my sister made
to her old university mate as they
visited me in 2nd Year. I remember
at the time smiling politely, letting
the comment pass me by, and taking a long swig of my dark, bitter,
beverage. It meant absolutely nothing. This is a sentiment, however,
which now rings loud and clear
like a delayed, haunting echo.
Indeed, the end of ‘yooni’ now encroaches like a sniggering Gremlin.
All’s left is to rush essays, cram for
exams, and have the obligatory 2
weeks of getting as battered as possible in a vain attempt to squeeze
the last stale drips of juice out of 3
years of education.
As with all things coming to an
end, the initial worry is missed
opportunities and regrets. If only
you’d inserted that paragraph,
gone to ‘that’ party or made friends
with that guy sooner. If only you
hadn’t accidentally sneezed in
her mouth or told all those racist
jokes to such an ill-judged audience. ‘That haircut was crap’, you
may be thinking. But that’s just it.
No one can ever be satisfied. Part
of being a flawed humanoid is an
insatiable and unquenchable thirst
for stuff. Absolutely no one sits
down at night, drunk off their own
smug existence, safe in the knowledge they’ve done everything they
have wanted to. Part of things ending is that pang of ‘I should have’,
or ‘I wish I’d had’.
But what does one do with such
a Biblical amount of time, with so
little to fill it with. The perpetual
phrase, ‘Ah it’ll be alright’ comes
to mind. Saved for when a housemate panics over his scrumpled up
revision sheet, and the stock utterance your mind’s voice mumbles
as you reset your alarm for your
ten o’clock lecture. Because, essentially… it always will ‘be alright’.
Although, as I’m beginning to fear
now, it always was going to be
‘alright’. What if it’s not now? Up
until now I’ve always been told
what to do, but all that precious
structure is now evaporating. No
warm cocoon of essay deadlines,
or time restrictions, or hours when
it’s cheap to drink. We’re stranded
like lame foals.
I can see it now. I’ll walk in on myself in about 2 months time whilst
I’m making my 16th cup of tea of
the day waiting for my dogs to do
something funny, a finished 10,000
piece jigsaw puzzle on the kitchen
table, the repeat of Inspector Morse
just about to start. Oh Christ. Its
3pm on a Tuesday and this is who
I am now. An unknowing leech
on nothingness as the university
comedown slowly alleviates itself
with daytime television and unfinished job applications. Those cretins on facebook I had once gritted
my teeth at will suddenly become
vibrant stars of a lost fantasy within my meaningless, grey life.
So now this is me ending this
word-dribble. This is an opportunity now coming into the realm
of the missed. It’s ending…a mere
spit stain in the corner of a fresh
corpse’s gob. It’s finishing now.
Now. Right now. Look... this is me,
missing an opportunity.....’Ah...it’ll
be alright’.
FEATURES
4th May 2009
Degree or not degree?
21
[email protected]
Material
Girls
With graduation a dark blot on many horizons, Lucy Margaret Clunie &
Marsden wonders if we’re getting enough out of our Jenny Greenwood
W
education.
Do University courses challenge
on enough levels? Considering
people are generally either verbally
or practically orientated do essay
based assessment courses really get
the best out of us?
Making a brief estimation I imagine
over the last 3 years of University
I’ve read around 50 books.
Since I’m a final year English
Literature student maybe that won’t
surprise so many people, but what
does seem rather unfair is the fact
that I have only been assessed on
about 20% of these.
Every day whilst fellow students
studying sciences and other more
practically based degrees prepare
for hours of lectures and practical
sessions specifically relevant to their
forthcoming examinations, I plod
along to my mere 8 hours a week
of contact time and spend the rest
of the week generally hiding out
in a booth in the Robinson Library
sifting through two to three novels a
week, so that I can discuss them for
an hour in a seminar with 12 plus
people and then forget all about
them.
I realise some might argue what
the hell are you complaining about,
but since in one module alone I’ve
studied 11 novels yet am only able to
write in depth on about 3 of them in
one singular essay, I feel that whilst
reading is something I thoroughly
enjoy, since I will not be assessed on
the remaining 8 novels, am I actually
wasting my time?
Could I have joined a book club
with my best friends accompanied
by a nice glass of wine and had an
informal chat instead?
The point I’m making is that some
university courses simply aren’t
challenging us on enough levels.
Why not incorporate more verbally
assessed elements or progressively
test students as each semester
unfolds?
It is a well researched fact that the
predominant population is either
practically or verbally orientated;
not everybody is best suited to
being assessed upon a 4000 word
essay alone.
Are lecturers really discovering
an individual’s understanding of
intended learning objectives by
limiting each student to writing on
a set number of texts?
Grades achieved are global
evaluations that represent the overall
proficiency of students in general,
but they fail to tell us much about
student performance on individual
learning goals.
The Guardian recently reported that
degrees were thought to be getting
easier as statistically there has
been a rise of 5 percent in students
obtaining 2.1s from 1996 to 2001.
I would be the first to profess that
my degree is not in the least bit easy,
but are assessment criteria vast and
intensive enough to challenge us
on a level we could never have
imagined pre-university?
Having recently spoken to a
close friend and recent graduate
of English Literature at Sussex
University I discovered she had
been accepted onto the Teach First
Graduate Scheme, which means
after 6 weeks of training she will
be teaching a group of challenging
teenagers in a socially deprived area
the ins and outs of Shakespeare and
other GCSE English material.
However, her boasts of success
having got onto the scheme were
closely followed by the proud
statement ‘and I only read one book
throughout the whole of my degree;
the rest I skimmed’.
Standing back in horror I realised
the reality of the situation we now
find ourselves in. Due to flawed
assessment techniques, thousands
of students may be cruising towards
a simple numerical ‘2.1’ imprint on
a piece of paper having chosen to
read a selective amount of material
and learnt only the essentials for
assessment purposes.
A number on a piece of paper is
all we achieve after several years of
researching and learning, making
it difficult to differentiate between
enthusiastic, dedicated students
and those who simply learn the bare
minimum in order to successfully
write one essay or answer an exam
paper sufficiently.
Graduate employers assess us
upon the qualifications we have
acquired but can tell little about
us as individuals from our degree
classification alone.
Clearly these simplistic techniques
used to quantify our levels of effort
and intelligence are failing students
themselves and consequently the
graduate market.
No employer wants an under
qualified employee, nor does
any student wish to gain a
qualification they haven’t felt
challenged to achieve.
Porn: A Family Business? Millicent Simon explores.
Porn today is a £3 billion a year
industry, and definitely appears
to be a stimulating topic of
conversation, seemingly generating
a mass debate.
Some find porn degrading and
vulgar as others find it pretty
exciting, orgasmic even. However,
whichever camp you belong to or
whether it is something you may
think you don’t get involved with, it
is affecting your life.
In the recent ‘Great Porn Debate’
featured
in
April’s
‘Grazia’
magazine a male and female
perspective is articulated.
Bill Borrows argues ‘Men
watch Porn, So What?’ He
makes a convincing point
calling porn ‘escapist fun’
and states it ‘doesn’t mean
I see every woman as a sex
object,’ (a common female
preoccupation).
However
certain
areas of his argument
appear
flawed.
Firstly
his
excuse
that watching porn is
‘much less stressful
than the apprentice’
is worrying, as this
makes one wonder
whether Bill watches
strangers have sex as
anything else is simply
too intellectually draining.
Perhaps pornography is the
MTV equivalent for those
without sky?
Much more troublingly however
is that if Bill were to ever generate
enough energy to watch a real
television programme, perhaps
channel 4s ‘Sex Education vs.
Pornography’ for example, he would
discover that the average age to first
watch porn is 11, and that 90% of
children have viewed pornography
accidently.
I doubt he would then find his
‘ready meal for the orgasm business’
appropriate for his own children’s
dietary requirements, particularly
when within seconds of searching
they could mistakenly find anything
from beastiality to paedophilia.
11 is also a shockingly young
age to experience the pressure
of
pornography’s
cosmetically
enhanced bodies, and the effects are
showing, with 1 in 4 teenage boys
being worried about penis size and
45% of girls being unhappy with
their breasts, as well as opting for a
more barey-than-hairy bikini line.
Internet porn may be fine for a
mature adults, however millions of
computers are still being sold every
year without any kind of parental
filters to protect infants from
alarmingly graphic content, surely
this needs to change.
However Bill is right, internet
porn does give men ‘what they
want’. What he ignores however
is the startling growth of female
pornographic interest, as the success
of companies such as ‘Ann Summers’
clearly illustrates.
Perhaps Bill should be worrying
slightly less about his ’10 minutes...
after the wife has gone to bed’ and,
like many men, slightly more about
competing with her 6” ‘rampant
rabbit’, something that regularly
tickles the fancy of 60% of women
today.
This increasing female role in the
sex industry illustrates that porn
may not be considered ‘for men’
much longer.
It also causes ‘Grazia’’s anti-porn
argument, against Bill, to seem
similarly unsound, as it presents
pornography as a solely male
‘addiction’, when clearly a female
interest is undeniable.
In fact the rising success of women’s
sexual accessories may even imply
that soon they too will be requesting
hairless bodies, silk undergarments
and maybe even cosmetically
enhanced physiques within their
partners.
However,
despite
ongoing
arguments between adult porn
lovers and haters surely the real
victims of this modern obsession are
the 1/3 of children using it for sex
education.
Adults are mature enough to take
control of their sex life and their
bodies, 11 year olds are not.
Although the amount of conflict
surrounding the sex industry today
might make the right course of action
seem unclear, the ideas for real sex
education and a default internet
filter found in the upcoming ‘protect
children against porn’ campaign
seem a step in the right direction.
e’re sure all you avid Courier
readers are fully aware, that this is,
sadly, the last issue of this year and
therefore The Material Girls’ final farewell before the big, bad and sometimesunfashionable world hits us. We’d like
to think we’ve covered a huge range of
fashion topics during our time, imparting wisdom and knowledge at every
step, from the maze of internet shopping to even spotting the wood from
the trees in the tricky but oh-so satisfying vintage shops.
This week, however, we’ve decided to
tackle one of the trickiest of all fashion
issues- the dreaded, but hugely important black tie outfit. With the end of term
drawing closer we’ve decided to ignore
these ‘finals’ things we’ve been hearing
about, choosing instead to investigate
what all you girls should be wearing to
your respective end of year balls. Everyone knows these momentous occasions are the perfect opportunity to get
dressed up in your best frock and show
those accustomed to your 9:00 am face
that you can, in fact, look ok.
But what if you don’t have this showstopping number already hanging in
your wardrobe, just waiting to be the
envy of everyone who looks upon it?
Well fear not…Here is your very rough
guide to how to buy black tie in Newcastle.
You could start with French Connection, with its wide selection ranging
from about £60-£160. Full of bright
colours and a large range of styles from
tunics to more modern, angular edges,
FCUK is sure to satisfy most tastes.
They still produce their trademark
formula of silky fabric, tassels and
sequins but if you’re not keen on everyone knowing exactly where you got
your dress from fear not…
Karen Millen (still available in Fenwicks after their main city centre store
has closed) also has a large selection of
very different styles of black tie. The
bright orange and purple body-con
dress (officially called the stretched
satin dress) which is everywhere at the
moment is an amazing buy at £160 as it
will last forever and is super flattering.
They also sell some very elegant LBD’s
and for full-on glamour there are the
full-length gowns from £200.
If neither of these take your fancy, look
into Zara, All Saints, Reiss and our alltime favourite Topshop, although you
do run the risk of committing the ultimate black tie fashion faux pas: wearing
the same dress as Jo bloody Bloggs…
and lets face it, she only bought it cos
she read about it here…and you’re better than that.
WHATS SO HOT:
Mr RW who wrote into The Courier last
week, thanks for your support. You’re
beautiful man.
WHATS SO NOT:
Mr RW for not telling us who you really are!
FEATURES
4th May 2009
More geek, less chic
Stephanie Ferrao argues the cult programme ‘Skins’
glamorises what is for many, less about class A
drug addiction and more about awkwardness and
inadequacies.
Watch it or slate it, it’s unlikely that
you’ll have missed the third series of
Skins gracing our television screens
as of January.
Just because the all-new “second
generation” of characters have
reached the dizzying heights of
sixth-form, it doesn’t signal a
departure from the riotous ways
of Tony & the gang in the previous
two seasons.
The sneak preview trailer spoke
for itself - a gang of drink and
drug-addled teenagers crash an
apparently “old-man” pub, only
to wreak typical Skins-style havoc,
complete with police and emergency
flares. But let’s snap back to reality
here.
Between the wanton sex and
liberal pill-popping, is this really
an accurate portrayal of their nonfictional counterparts: the teenagers
of twenty-first century? Yay or nay,
it’s certainly up for discussion.
Co-creators Bryan Elsley and
Jamie Brittain have certainly tried
to run the third series of Skins as
a continuation of the social trials
and shortcomings of teenagers
caught between adolescence and
adulthood.
Hats off to them for resisting the
“Between the wanton
sex and liberal pillpopping, is this really
an accurate portrayal
of their non-fictional
counterparts: the
teenagers of twentyfirst century?”
London-centric grip of the media
and using Bristol, capital of the
South-West instead. Don’t be fooled
by the funny accent - the city’s grim
underbelly matches the edgy tone of
the programme perfectly, even if the
crap opening theme tune doesn’t.
While the thriving-drugs scene is
familiar for most of the characters,
the hedonistic over-confident James
Cook best shows the glamorisation
of drugs in the programme.
For him, avoiding run-ins with
drug-barons and police-raids are
just part of the daily routine. Well
it certainly appears to pay off, as
he is regularly seen deliriously
high on the “quality gear”, at a
typically (for lack of a better phrase)
“skins party” – think underground
raves, woodland magic-mushroom
fests, that kind of thing.
For those who have actually flirted
with drugs, it’s
probably more likely
that you’ll see a shifty
friend-of-a-friend
who can put you in the
know.
This isn’t to say that
elements of the pill-popping,
girl-shagging,
club-brawling
Cook can’t be found in teenagers
across the country; but his antics are
intensified for dramatic purposes
so that it’s unrealistic to find real
people who are actually like him.
That’s why it’s a crying shame that
Skins writers feel that they have
to exaggerate these things just to
create someone worth examining –
are normal personalitybalanced teenagers just
not interesting enough?
Alongside drugs British
media discuss
b i n g e
drinking
ad
nauseam,
it
is
surprisingly less of a big deal in
Skins, and on the whole, binges are
saved for drugs.
Of course alcohol is enjoyed, but
in a very stylised way. None of
that mixer crap, Naomi and Katie
nonchalantly swig straight vodka
and Tomas chugs down whisky as
if it were Panda Pop.Clearly, hard
spirits are just so yesterday.
Going back to the mentioning
of a “skins party” – the term has
taken on a meaning of its own. I’m
talking about the reckless Myspace
advertising of a “Skins Unofficial
Party” at a girl’s house in County
Durham two years ago, resulting
in two-hundred gatecrashers and
a damages bill of over
£20,000.
What was clearly meant to be
some controlled chaos in the form
of a house party, snowballed into a
bit of a nightmare.
I guess the only way to map Skinsstyle partying on to your lifestyle is
to
throw
caution
to the wind
and embrace the consequences.
Mostly financially.
After turning twenty like everyone
else, I got all nostalgic for the years
when I still had “teen” on the end
of my age.
Looking back on bad fashion (the
Michael Jackson look: black trousers,
white socks), getting drunk from
two Smirnoff ices and awkward
dates with boys, I can safely say that
“For comedian
and writer Stuart
Lee, one look at the
unconvincing bonds
between characters
left him in no doubt
that watching
Skins as a teenager
today “would have
made [him] feel
more alone than in
the first place””
little of my adolescence was akin to
the too-cool antics in Skins.
For comedian and writer Stuart
Lee, one look at the unconvincing
bonds between characters left him
in no doubt that watching Skins as a
teenager today “would have made
[him] feel more alone than in the
first place”.
So forget the NME-directed
playlists and edgy production, if the
show’s writers are trying to relate to
modern-day teenagers, they need to
re-assess their strategy.
I’m not trying to make out that
twenty-first
century
teenagers
are bland and ineffectual. On
the contrary, the programme’s
writers are if anything, selling our
generation short in presenting the
Skins set as something we can
truly identify with.
So we can share the highs and
lows of love, and the dysfunctional
family issues, but there’s no need
to clamour for the shock-factor - it
just looks ridiculous and moreover,
unrealistic.
For the real cringe-worthy truths
of teenage life, look no further
than fellow Channel 4 hit The
In-Betweeners,
where
the
inadequacies of the characters
and awkwardness of
situations translate into
comedy kicks, simply
because we can all
relate to it.
23
[email protected]
Uni Verse
L
Dave Wingrave
eaving Uni is a bit like getting
smooshed by a car; at once a serious
blow to your social life and something
you never thought would happen to
you.
It is, if nothing else, an incredibly odd
time. The conveyor belt of education,
which to a greater or lesser extent has
been pre-set for the last 18 to 20 years
suddenly runs out, and you plop off the
end, into a world of uncertainty.
My days now seem to be filled with the
creation of ‘things to do before I go’ lists,
fond recollections of escapades past and
long trawls through Facebook’s photo
archive. Everything I do seems to be
some sort of ‘last ever’, and I await finals
with terror, not because of the fact I’ve
yet to start revision but because for as
long as I can remember, I’ve been working towards some kind of test, and after
these that will no longer be the case. To
quote the exceedingly droll Bill Watterson, ‘If your numbers go up, it means
you’re having more fun’. In a little over
a month, my numbers will become
static. Life without standardized exams
sounds like a wholly alien suggestion,
and to quote the exceedingly lame film
‘Numb3rs’, ‘What happens when the
numbers run out?’.
In British society at least, the entire focus of the, and I hate to say it, middle
class right-of passage is the jump from
A-levels (any other qualification simply
won’t do, dear) to university. But the
transition there is actually incredibly
muted when compared to the one that
happens three years later, that looming
chasm that awaits us third years.
Arrive at university, and the support
system that greets you, the opportunities
to meet people and the lack of responsibility defy belief. It honestly baffles me
to see misty-eyed mothers watch Rupert
or Felicity toddle off to Cambridge to
study classics, while weeping softly and
muttering about how they don’t think
their little darlings are going to cope.
What, 3000 students roughly the same
age, without a care in the world, disposable incomes, supermarket booze and no
inhibitions? Yeah, I doubt they’re going
to make it. It’s a smorgasbord of delights
I tell you! Not the bloody gulag.
Conversely, when the end inevitably draws nigh, and you wake from a
3-year drunken haze, wondering what
the crumpled piece of paper is clutched
in your grubby mit, only to realise it’s
a customary 2:1, you get practically no
guidance whatsoever! A careers fair?
Big fucking woop. Three miserable looking old women telling me my future lies
in data management? No thanks.
Ok, so that might be a little unfair,
there is help for graduates out there,
especially if you ask. But that doesn’t
change the fact that leaving uni is by far
the biggest step, the most radical regime
change, most of us will be experiencing for a while. And far more uprooting
and disturbing than the cushy life that
awaited us in halls. Oh well, at least the
economy looks welcoming.
FEATURES
24
4th May 2009
[email protected]
e
k
a
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e
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t
T
c
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t
s
Di
WithMonacooutofthequestion,Katherine
Bishop takes a look at a holiday a little closer
to home.
A week of walking in the English Lake
District was not how I envisaged my
Easter Break. Unfortunately, I have an
exercise-obsessed father who believes
trekking up mountains in the freezing
cold is a cathartic experience, a stress
buster.
After much moaning and attempted
persuasion to swap the mountains for
sunny Monaco, I’d resigned myself
to an Easter comprised of endurance
and April showers. It was time to
mentally prepare myself for a holiday
of hardcore physical exertion.
The car crammed to the full and
much motherly panic later- ‘have we
packed enough hats and scarves?’ – we
were finally on our way to the lakeside
town of Bowness-on-Windermere.
A combination of a very pleasant
journey through the Lake’s exquisite
lowlands and the cloudless blue sky
greatly improved my mood.
The charming country lanes guided
us through beautiful pastures, scenes
that should have popped straight out
of a Wordsworth poem.
We eventually rolled up to ‘Little
Ghyll’, the cottage we would call
home for the week. Situated in a
secluded spot surrounded by trees,
I was relieved to learn that at only a
ten minute walk away from the town
of Bowness: so then, quiet but not
isolated.
After hastily unpacking, it was time
to don the walking boots and explore
the town. My discovery was pleasantly
surprising.
The quaint lakeside town of Bowness
is situated among the spectacular,
sprawling foothills of the English
Lake District. A gateway to some of
the most breathtaking scenery in the
British Isles, I was shocked to discover
the wide range of activities this small
Lakeland town had to offer.
Being the nearest accessible point
to Lake Windermere, Bowness is
milling with tourists wishing to enjoy
sailing, watersports and lake cruises.
The charming white pier and small
pebbled beach is home to multitudes
of white swans that majestically guard
the water’s edge. A sight to behold in
itself.
Although I’m a Lakes
regular, I’ve never
climbed the notorious
Striding Edge. It was
time to show this arête
edge who was boss.
Unfortunately, it showed
me who was boss. To this
day I still haven’t climbed
it. I wimped out. Again.
The Lake Cruises are suitable for
all tastes. Whether taking a day off
walking, a lazy way to view the
countryside or visiting Lakeland
towns without having to drive, there
is a cruise available for you.
Ticket prices range from a £4 return
travelling across the width of the
lake, to a thrifty £36 for a Three Day
Freedom ticket allowing you to travel
on any cruise route.
Travelling
from
Bowness
to
Ambleside is a fantastic way to spend
a day. Setting off bright and early, we
caught a morning boat for a day of
‘gentle’ walking. At £8.90 per head,
the 45 minute one way trip seemed
expensive. The magnificent views of
the Fairfield Horseshoe and Wansfell
Pike compensated for this.
Once disembarked at the Pier, we
walked through the bustling town
of Ambleside and into the peaceful,
surrounding fells. After a brisk ascent
through lowland farms and fairytale
cottages, we had reached the tops.
As we walked along the grassy,
undulating ridges of Loughrigg Fell,
there were fantastic panoramic views
of Ambleside, Windermere, Rydal,
and Grasmere. The weather was
not cloudless, but the surrounding
mountain ranges were clear of
mist, this giving us a menacing, yet
enchanting view of the mountains we
would attempt over the next week.
After a hike rife with beautiful views,
great conversation and relatively
pleasant weather, five hours later we
were back in Ambleside.
The gentle fells were forgotten as we
tackled the ‘bad-boys’ of mountain
walking. Our first endeavour: Ill
Crag.
This 7 hour trek began in the
beautiful Langdale Valley – a glacial
triumph. Beginning with a two mile
walk on the gentle Cumbrian way, we
walked along the grassy, U-shaped
valley bottom.
I was deceived into thinking this
was going to be a walk in the park.
Then the ascent began, as did the
tears. Admittedly, the first incline to
the striking Angle Tarn was mentally
tough. The weather was poor and the
climb looked never-ending. As the
weather cleared, we were surrounded
by blue skies, sunshine and remarkable
scenery. A dose of serotonin gave me
a second wind.
I was as nimble as a mountain goat
as I sprang up the tricky terrain to Esk
Hause, and Ill Crag. We picnicked on
the top, enjoying refreshing views of
Scafell Pike, and the Langdale Valley.
Eventually, we began the tricky
descent. I arrived at the valley bottom
with jelly legs. The silver lining? My
thighs and bum were looking great,
even if I had to physically drag my
legs (they felt more like stumps) back
to the car park.
Helvellyn was next on our agenda.
We parked in the quaint village of
Patterdale and made our way up
the daunting incline. Although I’m a
Lakes regular, I’ve never climbed the
notorious Striding Edge. It was time
to show this arête edge who was boss.
Unfortunately, it showed me who was
boss. To this day I still haven’t climbed
it. I wimped out. Again.
My dad, sister and boyfriend were
hardier. They battled hail storms,
gales and snow to reach the apex.
I was almost one sister and one
boyfriend down at the end of the day.
A particularly strong gust nearly took
them out during an enthusiastic highfive on the summit. They all agreed it
was an experience of a life time, even
if the view was blurred by hail and
cloud.
If walking isn’t your thing, there
are still plenty of activities to do
in Bowness and the surrounding
area. During a romantic stroll with
my boyfriend, he suggested we go
rowing on the lake. Romantic turned
frantic at his suggestion. Not being the
biggest fan of open water, I mumbled
something about there being too much
wind. How about a trip into Grasmere
on an open topped bus?
Grasmere is charming, but boring
after a couple of hours. Home to
William Wordsworth, the village
milks this to the extreme. After looking
at Wordsworth’s grave, the heavens
opened and we ate in a riverside cafe
called William’s. Original.
The cafe was surprisingly cheap, and
made fantastic scones. A definite treat
after a hard days walk. Grasmere has a
glowing reputation for its gingerbread
making expertise. The gingerbread
lived up to this. This delicacy was
extremely tasty and reasonably priced
at £4 for twelve big pieces... not that it
lasted long.
Eating out in Bowness was a
success. Although the Lake District
is renowned for being expensive,
restaurant Postillion busted this
myth.
This eccentric restaurant was situated
in the cobbled backstreets of Bowness,
and had a set menu of wide variety for
a recession busting £16. It was softly
lit, smelt divine and felt homely.
If you want to live like a hermit for
the week, the multitudes of tourists
that flock into the towns can also be
off putting, so opt for a quieter spot
than Bowness.
Even if you aren’t a huge exercise fan,
the Lake District has something for
everyone. It’s undeniable beautiful, a
place of English splendour that is easily
accessible and a perfect opportunity to
see and try new things.
C
M
Y
K
25
[email protected]
CULTURE
4th May 2009
Art Alicia Clovis
Ents Aimee Philipson
Strictly Come Students! pg. 26 EAT! Food Fest pg. 30
Music Heather Welsh
on Bats For Lashes pg. 29
Film Christina Renner
Winning Winslet pg. 33
Is Iggy a sell-out?
Culture debates the Stooges legend’s recent career path...
YES
A
s the bedraggled, gaunt, manic
front man of the US garage-rock band
the Stooges, Iggy Pop helped pioneer
punk rock a decade before Johnny
Rotten et al burst onto the scene. He is
still at the top of his game in a career
nearly five decades old.
So who cares if he wants to advertise
some insurance company? Well, I
do. And so do legions of loyal fans,
who have enjoyed sticking it to the
man since the late 1960s, fans who
remember saving up their pocket
money, or would get up an hour
early before school to deliver papers,
just so they could but a 12 inch copy
of Raw Power.
Ironically, these same fans who had
hair down to their knees and wore
“...Who cares if he
wants to advertise
some insurance
company?
Well, I do...”
ripped leather jackets and couldn’t
give a fuck about authority probably
now work for a different insurance
company in a monstrous concrete
office block in some faceless town
or city somewhere in the Midlands,
worrying about their pension fund
and the fact that their teenage
daughter wears short skirts. These
fans will still have said record up
in the attic – because there’s just no
room in the house, not with CDs
of Coldplay and Keane taking up
valuable space on the IKEA beechveneer shelving unit.
Regardless of the fans ‘selling out’
or not, they are still fans dammit, and
they deserve to see their idols stick to
their beliefs. When a rock star sells out,
he does more than betray himself; he
also betrays his fans who have stuck
with him through thick and thin (or
in the case of the freakishly slender
Iggy Pop, thin and thin).
While rock stars, like the rest of us,
need to find money for that next gram
of blow, they shouldn’t compromise
their principles for it – especially for
a company that doesn’t even cover
musicians, and so wouldn’t be able to
give its spokesman insurance. Plus,
what the hell does a rock star even
know about car insurance?
He’s probably been unable to drive
ever since a bad acid trip in the
1970s.
Pip Copley
NO
A
s Culture departs for the
summer, it takes a large number of
writers and editors with it, as it does
every year. The Courier has had a
huge effect on all our experiences at
university and we’ll try our darndest
to take the ethos and principals we’ve
learned from our time in student
journalism with us. But what if we
fail? As us three grow up a wee bit
more, possibly venture into the realm
of real life, what if we, dare I say it,
SELL OUT?
Selling out seems more prevalent
than ever nowadays. Now I know that
the actual act of selling out is pretty
hard to define. Does it purely mean
giving up any trace of artistry for the
sake of endorsement? Can the two be
reconciled? Can past achievements
or status guard from the inevitably
damaging fan backlash, or do our
greatest heroes feel like the biggest
betrayal? It’s a tricky one, illustrated
perfectly by former Stooge Iggy Pop’s
appearance in a series of insurance
adverts for Swiftcover.com.
In this case, the issue has been
compounded by the revelation that
Swiftcover do not actually offer
insurance to musicians, prompting
howls of rage and even accusations
of misleading advertising by many
artists. I doubt anyone’s actually
bothered about this fact though, no,
their continued anger and indignation
almost certainly stems from the fact
that they feel Iggy’s perfidy is about
as big a slap in the face as is humanly
possible.
The
original
proto-punk?
Selling car insurance? Prancing
about, the puppet to some
amorphous
corporate
entities’
boardroom
approximation of rock
‘n’ roll? Perish the
thought. I, personally,
refused to believe it
when informed of
the fall of Mr. Pop by
friends. There are,
however, two things to
remember.
The first is that this
is a generational thing,
Iggy is now 62, he’s not
a young, idealistic zealot
turned company wank
rag, he’s an old geezer.
The
people
running
Swiftcover are probably
about the same age and
see him in a different way
as you or I do. Hell, they
might have even listened
to his records when they
were first released. In short,
they’re probably not very
aware of what they’re doing,
I doubt they lurk in dimly-lit
crypts, plotting which former
anti-establishment icon they
can lure into ignominy next.
The second is that even
if Iggy has in fact become a
soulless schmuck, it doesn’t
really matter. It doesn’t
change the fact that what he
did do was revolutionary. His
emaciated figure leering from
the TV won’t make Fun House
or Raw Power any weaker
albums. Their impact has been
registered by history, and will
remain in the annals for far
longer than any footnote about
Swiftcover.
Dave Wingrave
“... even if Iggy has in
fact become a soulless
schmuck, it doesn’t really
matter. It doesn’t change
the fact that what
he did do was
revolutionary.”
26
4th May 2009
I
I
CULTURE
[email protected]
I think I might be just a little bit in love with Newcastle. Not in a weird, fetishistic way, like that woman who married the Eiffel Tower. For one thing, it would
be hell trying to take the Sage out for a coffee, and having dinner with the Baltic would be a logistical nightmare.
But after a year of editing this section, my appreciation of Newcastle’s incredible culture scene has grown each week. The sheer brilliance, ambition and
mind-boggling insanity of the exhibitions that have taken place at the Baltic this year, the ground-breaking theatrical performances staged at the small-butperfectly-formed Northern Stage and the sheer joy of rediscovering my inner child again at the Seven Stories Centre for Children’s Books have been my
personal highlights.
That said, I also have a massive amount of respect for the dedicated students who have organised art exhibitions for charity, displayed their own work
for the first time and directed or acted in shoestring-budget plays that would take a professional acting company months to prepare for and thousands of
pounds to stage. The last time I successfully ventured on stage was when I made my NUTS debut as the back end of the pantomime horse. Not my finest
hour. However, this year my fellow thesps have put me to shame by acting in some truly amazing NUTS productions.
Anyway, I hope that you’ve been inspired by something you’ve read in the Arts section to go and experience a bit of culture for yourself this year. I thought
was a fully paid-up member of the smug arty club before I started editing but after reading the work of my incredible team of dedicated writers each and
every week, I can honestly say that I’ve had my eyes well and truly opened. Thank you guys.
Katie xxx ([email protected])
Strictly Come Students
ALICIA CLOVIS interviews the man behind the genius idea to bring sequins, sparkle
and mirror balls to Newcastle University. Brucie had better watch his back...
JG: I have absolutely no idea,
biggest mistake of my life…I
was press-ganged! No really I
just thought it might be a good
chance to learn how to dance and
I guess they thought I’d be easiest
to humiliate!
IM: Hey,
minute.
he’s
loved
every
AC: What’s been the best part?
JG: Definitely Iona
IM: The best bit is where he puts
his hands on my bum [cheeky!].
No, actually this is the first time
I’ve actually taught dance, and
I’ve really enjoyed it; he couldn’t
dance at all before and now he’s
coming up with moves. The big
finish is his idea.
If your timetable’s anything
like mine then May is a horrible
month, so you’ll be pleased to hear
that some cracking entertainment
is on the way to lighten the exam
period.
If you missed Comic Relief does
Strictly then fear not, your chance
to have a giggle for charity at the
expense of your fellow students
braving it on the dancefloor in
head-to-toe lycra is now here.
Brucey beware, they’re getting
out the sequins for READ
international, a student run
charity, which aims to collect
up our reams of unused books
& send them over to schools in
Tanzania (you may have noticed
big green book drop bins around
campus). I interviewed Jimmy
Greene (AU officer) who’s been
learning a jive-tastic routine with
Iona McNeill for this great cause.
AC: So why did you agree to
participate in this event?
JG: Ha ha, yeah it’s complex too!
AC: So this could be the start…
or end of something beautiful!
What’s been the worst bit…..so
far?
JG: Realising I have absolutely
no eye / foot coordination,
coupled with the fact we keep
having
Thursday
afternoon
rehearsals after a heavy night at
Blu Bambu.
Easy Reader
As a country with a history
of producing some of the best
literature in the world, surely we
Brits should know our Blake from
our Brontë, our Dickens from our
Defoe?
Well, we may not, but
apparently we certainly want
others to think so. A recent survey
marking World Book Day found
that two out of three Britons lie
about reading particular books in
order to impress others. Topping
the list of pretend reads at 4 out
of 10 people, is George Orwell’s
dystopian thriller Nineteen EightyFour. Other high-rankers included
doorstop reads: Tolstoy’s War and
Peace and Joyce’s Ulysses. Simply
casting one look at these stats begs
the question; why does it happen
so much?
Those polled admitted that they
lied in order to impress friends,
appear well-read in job interviews,
or even to look impressive on
a UCAS application. When
applying for university, I can
recall an instance when a friend
who was applying for English
at Oxford, falsely claimed on his
personal statement that he had an
extensive knowledge of Russian
Literature. Unfortunately for him,
someone had clearly picked up
on this as he was subsequently
interviewed by the granddaughter
of Boris Pasternak, author of
Doctor Zhivago.
Many also confessed to lying to
make a good impression on dates,
though personally, I wouldn’t be
that impressed if I was going on
a date with one of the 15% who
(somewhat bizarrely) claimed to
have read Stephen Hawking’s A
Brief History of Time.
It seems that it is now necessary
to have read an intellectual
whopper or a canonical classic to
validate yourself as an intelligent,
well-rounded person. If this is
the case, then it is ironic that
the nation’s reading habits have
been shaped by education (GCSE
English sadly put many of my
friends off To Kill A Mockingbird)
and to an extent, cultural factors.
At university, there’s still a stigma
amongst many that reading just
isn’t cool, and the national media
has gone as far as to brand us the
“iPod generation”. According
to many recent documentaries,
England has slipped from 3rd to
19th in international comparisons
of children’s reading which
arguably, is where the problem
started. When we were younger,
AC: Can
sequins?
we
expect
some
IM: We’ll have all the gear and no
idea…it’ll be glittery, camp and
hilarious!
JG: I’ll be in high heels and a tutu
– anything to distract people from
actually looking at my dancing
skills!
IM: Actually, he told me his
hockey skills have improved
because he’s been more on his
toes!
JG: Oh God don’t say that, now
I’m gonna have to try and break
my leg so I don’t show myself up
on the pitch!
AC: So hopefully the team will
show up to mock….I mean
support you – no pressure to
perform well now! How are you
feeling about the competition?
JG: I really want to beat Claire
Hurdman, but I reckon George is
probably my biggest competition
on my level. We’re aiming for
third…
AC: Hmmm, confident then?
Seriously how has it been
learning to jive with Iona?
JG: It’s been a nightmare! No just
kidding it’s been fun- not really
a chore and it’s for charity, but
sometimes Iona just does this
[starts waving manically and
madly twitching his leg] and I
have to stop her 10 minutes later
and ask her to break it down S-LO-W-L-Y.
IM: Sometimes I just forget that
he’s not been doing this as long
as me and I expect him to be able
to do all the moves, so it’s been a
good learning curve for me too!
AC: Famous last words?
JG & IM: Keeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
eeeeeeeeeeeep dancing!
The competition takes place on
Tuesday 5th May at St James Park
Football Stadium starting 7:30pm.
Tickets cost £6 for students, are
on sale in the Union’s reception
and will be available on the
door. All proceeds will help
get Newcastle’s READ team a
little closer to the £7500 target.
Check out the facebook group
for more details. Interested in
volunteering for READ? Email
James O’Sullivan: newcastle@
readbookproject.org.uk.
Alicia Clovis
STEPHANIE FERRAO investigates the
cultural trend for lying about literature
and wonders: does the Sparknotes
generation actually read anymore?
television and the rise of games
consoles had such a huge impact on
our lives, that reading went from
commonplace entertainment, to
the preserve of school time. And
no one wanted to do school-work
when there was Fun House on
TV, right?
The problem of reading has
been taken right to the top, with
Gordon Brown stepping in to
back a National Year of Reading.
Sky’s Book Show, which features
authors, editors and celebrities
talking about their favourite
books, has also played a part,
and partners-in-crime Richard
and Judy have been credited
with helping to shift thousands of
books and get the nation reading
again by pioneering new writing.
They’ve almost single-handedly
helped to launch the careers of
authors such as Kate Mosse (not
the model), author of The Kite
Runner Khaled Hosseini, and
Monica Ali. Many of the authors
promoted have consequently
established themselves as writers
of 21st century classics.
OK so it’s no high-brow literary
discussion, but getting people to
read a book from cover to cover
has to be better than those who
judge a book only by its cover.
Stephanie Ferrao
C
M
Y
K
CULTURE
4th May 2009
The Baltic
If you visit the Baltic this season
go straight to the top floor and look
down on Sarah Sze’s sprawling
exhibition Tilting Planet. The
artist has created sculptures from
everyday disposable objects and
her attention to minute detail
is meticulous, surprising and
delightful.
From above, it is like Google
Earth for a planet of matches and
coloured string; the sculptures
take on the appearance of graceful
sweeping contours, urban sprawl
and impressive cityscapes. Every
element is delicate and balanced
precariously yet perfectly. Her
work is every bit as
beautiful and intricate
as our own world, and
just as fragile.
On the floor below is
A Duck for Mr. Darwin,
a collaboration inspired
by Charles Darwin and
his work, marking 150 years since
the publication of The Origin of
Species. Also celebrating the beauty
and diversity of our planet, the
exhibition includes an earthworm
farm, a mesmerising video of jelly
fish and a shed/studio filled with
a lifetime’s collection of objects,
in which the artist himself potters
about making occasional changes
to its content. My favourite piece
was a film about the people of the
Galapagos Islands, from the point
of view of a bird asking questions
about their way of life and human
behaviour in general.
Spread throughout the Baltic, Ctrl.
Alt.Shift. are pieces by young people
working with artists, considering
the theme of conflict. They were
asked to focus particularly on
Columbia and the violence the
country has seen; however the
works contemplating riot have an
uncomfortable relevance to the here
and now since the recent events
involving riot police in London.
All of the current exhibitions
contemplate our world, celebrating
its beauty and diversity, whilst
consciously acknowledging its
fragility and flaws. Take time to
look out the window whilst you’re
here.
27
[email protected]
Northern Stage
There’s a daunting few months
ahead for us students. So for
those looking to do something
other than revise, or those lucky
buggers who finish soon and have
a lazy summer to fill, here’s what
is happening at your favourite
artsy theatre in the toon!
If you’re looking to embrace
local talent before being dragged
back home, there’s an exciting
project coming up. Written by
local Margaret Wilkinson, Queen
Bee is produced by the North
East Theatre Consortium, a
collaboration of local theatres and
New Writing North to produce
the best plays from the region.
It’s even set in a somewhat scary
Northumbria!
Queen Bee is a chilling
contemporary ghost drama with
a psychological twist. Inspired
by classic ghost stories, the play
studies three women confined
to their lonely Northumberland
Manor house and sharing an
escalating suspicion about what,
if anything, is lurking outside.
The audience is left wondering
what’s real and what’s imagined,
who’s innocent and who’s in the
most danger! You can catch this
May 13-16 with tickets at £5.50
Beatrice Pickup
for students.
Following this is a unique
adaptation of Wuthering Heights
that’s Bollywood-inspired and
set in a scorching desert of India.
When beautiful, headstrong
Shakuntala falls for the street
urchin Krishan adopted by
her father, she must overcome
society’s taboos and hierarchy
as well as her own yearnings
for riches and status.This is a
creative musical from leading
British-Asian company, Tamasha
(creator of East is East).
Following on in early June is a
look at the best contemporary
French plays, Paris Calling.
A national showcase of the
most innovative and cuttingedge artists, in contemporary
French drama, circus and dance.
Guaranteed change of
scene!
For more information on
any of these performances
see the Northern Stage
website, and brighten up
one of your evenings in the
coming summer months.
Talk of the
Town
The 29th of May sees
the Fine Art students of
Newcastle University
unveil the product
of their intense four
year course, and by all
accounts its going to be
a night to remember.
The show will run for
two weeks and the
opening night looks to
be particularly exciting,
with the work on view between
6-8pm, followed by an after party
at BALTIC open to all (complete
with bands and D.J’s).
Newcastle students, and anyone
else who fancies it, are encouraged
to stop by and have a look. The
enormous variety of work by
students from varied backgrounds
with hugely diverse skills means
Arts uncovers all the creative
goodness
happening
in
Newcastle over the next few
weeks...
that all viewers will find something
to engage with. From paintings
to sculpture, installations and
Photography, most facets of the
richly textured contemporary art
world are represented right here,
in the microcosm of one year of
Newcastle graduates.
The Hatton Gallery as well as the
two fine art buildings, situated just
off the quadrangle, will be packed
full with some of Britain’s emerging
artistic talent. One of the most
ambitious student years to date,
2009’s graduating students have,
over the past 4 years, exhibited
their work in galleries all over the
North East.
The Hanger 51 space in Ouseburn
has played host to a selection of
attention-grabbing
exhibitions
and, most recently the Ctrl.Alt.
Shift project at BALTIC has gained
national press coverage and seen
the 13 Newcastle students involved
featured in Dazed and Confused.
Right on your doorstep, the degree
show is a perfect opportunity to
see a selection of thoughtful, witty
and striking art from graduating
students. You never know, you
may even be able to purchase
or commission some reasonably
priced work from these young and
exciting artists!
Olivia Mee
The Hatton
The Theatre Royal
There are serious exciting times
a-coming at Newcastle’s Theatre
Royal over the next few months.
Normally recognized as the
cravat-wearing
conservative
older brother to Northern
Stage’s slightly punkier, more
experimental little sister, the
Theatre Royal has become
synonymous with proper grownup theatre complete with big
budgets, big sets and even bigger
stars; think Ian McKellen and
Patrick Stewart in Waiting For
Godot.
However, over the next few
months, the Theatre Royal will be
heading back to the mean streets
with a celebration of surely one
of the most urban art-forms;
break-dancing.
Featuring some of the world’s
hottest ‘poppers, lockers, b-boys
and b-girls’ (no, I’ve got no
idea what they’re talking about
either), Breakin’ Convention is
about to embark on a nationwide
tour and after the phenomenal
success of last year, Newcastle
has remained a firm favourite on
the tour agenda.
Featuring Hip Hop legends such
as Kenny ‘Ken Swift’ Gabbert,
who’s appeared in classic films
such as Flashdance, seasoned
dance pro Salah, affectionately
known as the ‘Charlie Chaplin of
Hip-Hop’ and award-winning,
Korean dance troup Myo Sung,
this mastercalss in how to throw
some serious shapes is not to be
missed.
However, if you like your
theatrical experience to be a wee
bit more sedate then indulge in
some good ol’ fashioned Rogers
and Hammerstein romance
with the suitably tropical South
Pacific or, even more excitingly,
catch the newest theatrical
adapatation of the classic weepie
Brief Encounter. The Kneehigh
Theatre Company has recreated
the ultimate example of stiffupper-lipped British repression
on the stage, so prepare for
ridiculously clipped accents,
atmospheric train stations and
unspoken love.
At this rate, the Theatre Royal
may well be giving perrenial
favourite Northern Stage a run
for its money in terms of edgy,
innovative and entertaining
theatre.
Breakin’ Convention: 27th-28th
May
South Pacific: 18th-23rd May
Breif Encounter: 12th-16th May
See
the
website
(www.
theatreroyal.co.uk) for more
details.
Katie Witcombe
CULTURE
4th May 2009
Penguin Designs
As far as culture goes, Newcastle
really does have something for
everyone. So when I heard about
a local exhibition celebrating 70
years of Penguin Design, I knew
that this was an opportunity not
to be passed up. I grabbed a mate,
and hopped on a bus across the
Tyne to the Shipley Art Gallery
in Gateshead.
For
a
globally-renowned
brand, Penguin comes from
surprisingly humble roots. It all
began in 1935 when Allen Lane,
founder of Penguin, was looking
for something to read for his
train journey back to London.
Disappointed with the choice
of poor-quality paperbacks, he
set out to create a company that
would publish quality books at
an affordable price. Believing
that a good read should be
available to everyone, Lane
didn’t just distribute them to
bookshops; but also chain stores
and tobacconists where Penguin
books could be bought for less
than a packet of cigarettes.
Only ten months after being
launched, Penguin had printed
one million books, the company
sky-rocketed, and the rest is
history.
Created
in
collaboration
with the V&A in London, the
exhibition shows how British
reading habits and tastes have
been shaped by Penguin; this has
certainly been proved
by the longstanding
popularity of the
iconic triple-banded
cover
designs,
colour-coded
by
genre. These days the
Penguin cover has
had a huge revival;
it only takes one
glance at the Shipley
gift shop or even the
stationary sections of Blackwell’s
and Waterstone’s to see that you
can buy posters, notepads and
pencils all emblazoned with the
famous design. I for one was
sorely tempted by a Pride and
Prejudice mug.
The displays showcase a huge
range of original classic fiction
paperbacks, including the edgy
monochrome cover of Joyce’s
Ulysses and the unsettling design
of Anthony Burgess’ Clockwork
Orange. Also on show are a range
of contemporary covers designed
for authors such as Nick Hornby,
Marian Keyes and Zadie Smith.
If you, like us, are 20 going on
12, there are some children’s
activities you can try your hand
at, such as creating your own
book cover by messing around
with various titles, cover designs
and penguins on a projector.
Shipley curator Amy Barker
believes the exhibition is “a
trip down memory lane” for
anyone who enjoys a good read,
and I can’t help but agree. The
exhibition draws to a close at the
end of May, so take my advice is
fit in a pre-exams trip over the
Tyne to check out some of the
most exciting and iconic book
covers in publishing history.
Stephanie Ferrao
29
[email protected]
The Shoe Tree
If you’ve been down to the
woods today, you’re sure for
a big surprise...no, not a teddy
bear’s picnic but a magnificent
shoe tree! On taking the scenic
route to Morrisons, a friend
and I spotted the rather odd
looking silhouette of a large tree
supporting a suspended shoe
collection…strappy stilettos hang
within range of Nike hi-tops and
child-sized jelly shoes of the sort
that I used
to wear to
Playgroup.
T h i s
unexpected
spectacle can
be
found
on the walk
imbetween
Best in
Show
such as Mother and
Daughter, of Brigette
Bardot,
and
a
particularly stunning
Jackie
Kennedy,
immediately
after
the assignation of her
husband; to family
snaps. As a result, his
work transforms the
viewer into voyeur.
I was fascinated by
the grainy replicas
of German family
wartime snaps, taken
from adverts and
from real-life relations
of Richter, some of
whom were victims
of the Nazi regime,
demonstrating
the
permanent
confinement of a moment within
a photograph and its exclusion
from external life.
My particular favourites were
the fuzzy, intimate depictions of
his wife and their newborn son.
The near-perfect replica of these
hospital shots was so beautiful
and engaging, possibly because
I felt like I was intruding upon
something.
It’s so inspiring to discover
something new that actually has
a massive impact. I hope to go
to the National Portrait awards
over the summer and maybe find
an artist to fascinate me for next
year.
Jesmond Dene and Heaton Park
and for the sheer curiosity factor
on first sighting, it has got to be
my arts moment of the year!
Not just a public arts display,
this tree has a story; it turns
out that it’s an old American
tradition
for
students
to
celebrate the end of exams by
throwing their shoes into their
local shoe tree- of course every
neighbourhood needs one. It is a
community’s canvas to be added
to by any local who fancies tying
some laces together and saying
goodbye to some footwear in one
celebratory throw.
So needless to say, this June I
will be down at Jesmond Dene
adding my old running shoes to
the mix at Newcastle’s 20 year
old shoe tree.
Florence Stuart-Leach
The Arts team get all
misty-eyed and nostalgic
as they remember their
most inspirational cultural
moments of 2008/09
Gerhard Richter
Previous to this academic year,
Gerhard Richter didn’t ring any
artistic bells in my head. When
reminded, I realised that he was
responsible for the picture in that
big Art Book which I always stared
at going ‘nah mate, that can’t be
painted?’ Then, realising it was,
figured it highly impressive but
not so far removed from what
the quiet kids in my art class did
while I was busy getting printing
ink on my face.
Oh, how wrong I was. This year
I have only managed to get to a
handful of exhibitions, but two
of them have been by Gerhard
Richter, and have featured some
of the most inspirational work
I’ve ever seen.
Richter is an artist controversial
due to his fascination with
emotion-free ‘photo painting’.
He
paints
portraits
from
photographs, which includes pap
shots from newspaper cuttings,
Alice Vincent
‘I am going to be
small’
The Eternal Light
Tour
Writing for Arts gets you out there,
sifting through everything this
vibrant city has to offer. So it’s a
bit pathetic that I’m going to talk
about a book of comics from all the
way over there in America, isn’t it?
Well, tough.
The book is called I am going to
be small, and it is an amalgamation
of different comic strips and
individual pictures which Jeffrey
Brown has squeezed out of his
mind. Most of the snippets are from
Brown’s own p.o.v., and explore
apparently whatever pops into his
head: having sex with one Siamese
twin whilst the other half is asleep,
pooing so as to make more room for
eating, and the existence of God.
If you think it sounds a bit naive
you’re probably right, but then
you’re probably one of those people
who think that art always has to be
serious and tackle weighty issues.
Well, I disagree, art is there to be
humorous, and to be enjoyed too.
This little book was a great 21st
birthday present, and has kept
me laughing throughout the year.
Buy it and spread the love, or
something.
I wont deny it, I am a bit of
a dance freak. Ballet, samba,
tango, whatever – I’m open
to anything that emanates
pulsating energy & beauty
which is why Rambert’s Eternal
Light Tour 2009 gets my vote for
favourite arty experience this
year.
The dancers proved to be
wonderfully varying in style, all
with amazing (soul destroyingly flexible) talents – one could
see immediately the different
personalities which are so often
lost in classical ballet, and it was
a joy to watch them explode
onto the stage.
Eternal Light sported amazing,
elaborate costumes, including
a giant Toucan, and was
accompanied by the wonderful
Tees Valley Youth Choir.
Siobahn Davies’ quirky version
of Carnival of the Animals was
delightful, although not at all as
I expected (no Lion King-esque
wardrobe here; waistcoats &
tails jackets all the way!), which
is very refreshing. I found the
cuckoo’s beating heart scene
especially hilarious.
But the deal-breaker for me
Alice Bowell
had to be the UK debut showing
of Christopher Bruce’s Hush. His
work is often politically satirical,
quirky & darkly comical so I
was praying not to be let down.
Hush proved to be a lighthearted and raucous musical
celebration of life. Set to music
by Bobby McFerrin and Yo-Yo
Ma, the music is recognisable
but cleverly reworked; it’s
a pleasure to leave a dance
performance humming a catchy
tune! The whole piece appeared
to be designed purely to lift your
spirits & the whole audience
were laughing out loud in parts.
I dare anyone who thinks dance
can’t be funny not to howl at
the clown children’s imitations
& bee eating.
This experience reminded me
of what is so often forgotten;
that the arts should be enjoyable
to all and that there are geniuses
out there who combine so many
elements of life and art to touch
a range of people.
For those of you who are
intrigued, the tour continues until
mid June with performances in
Leeds and London, or you can
log into www.rambert.org.uk
for the photo gallery and video
clips.
Alicia Clovis
CULTURE
[email protected]
30
4th May 2009
I can’t quite believe it, but it would seem that this is the last ever Ents to be laid up, which has got me thinking about the past year pretty heavily. That, and the
fact that our review page is dedicated to people’s retrospectives this week. To sum up those which I couldn’t fit in (how come every other Culture page grew this
week?!), it seems people have loved dressing up, regardless of any ‘union’ associations, those hidden-away finds of pubs, pulling all-nighters and watching the sun
rise, on the way home from somebody else’s or otherwise, plus many, many more.
I’m lucky enough to have another year left of uni, but it still sucks that this one’s over. The only consolation being, that I’ve had a fricking awesome one. Making
more friends, having new experiences, discovering other places - it all sounds pretty mundane like that. Highlights in short: Monday nights, even bigger WHQ
obsessions, Sunday morning recoveries, kitchen parties, Leona Lewis Boob Watch (don’t ask), and, actually, these two pages. Massive big up to Ents’ writers and
the rest of the Culture team who’ve made every Tuesday this year memorable.
Have an amazing summer, and make sure there’s time after exams to prolong studentendom as long as possible!
love love, Vince-Ents xxx
previews
Eat your way through Exams It’s Newcastle’s Food Fest!
Get ready for the best Toon days
all year as we play host to the
EAT! Festival from the 2nd – 17th
May!
Ranging from exciting food
markets, cooking workshops,
celebrity chefs and huge tea
parties, this event will be
promoting everything to do with
creating, sharing and stuffing
your face with all types of food
and drink.
Kicking off with the Spring to
Life Launch Party on Friday 1st,
there will be an outdoor barbeque,
a seafood bar and live music held
in the newly refurbished St Mary’s
church by the Sage.
Tickets are £25 but if that’s a
little out of you price range, hold
off until the festival’s last weekend
where there will be an abundance
of things to see and do for free.
Friday 15th sees the opening of
the Food Heroes Tasting Market
at the Civic Centre, hosting sixty
of the region’s most exciting food
and drink producers.
Archers Ice cream, Xocolatyl
Chocolates,
Craster
kippers,
Wylam beer, award-winning
Rothbury’s Sausages and Trees
Can’t Dance are just a few who
will be offering up their products
for sample and sale.
The market will stay open until
8.30pm on the Friday, so you can
grab something to eat on your
way into town.
By far, one of the most exciting
gastronomic events will be the
Food Adventure Playground
held on the 15th May from 12pm8.30pm and on the 16th May from
10am-5pm at the Civic Centre.
Featuring
workshops
such
as making fresh pasta and
cooking classic Geordie dishes,
the playground will also host
eccentric experiments provided
by the Centre for Life, and
you can even paint a chocolate
masterpiece with chocolatiers
Davenport Chocolates.
Unleash your competitive side
at the Fling-a-Flatbread contest or
pull on a fat chef’s costume and
bounce your way to victory at
the It’s a Knockout-style Stockpot
Game.
If you’re too sophisticated for
all that (but who wouldn’t want
to hurl a naan bread around?!),
there will be a few alcohol-based
activities too.
Newcastle Whisky Festival is
being held on the 9th May from
11am-5pm at the Discovery
Museum and the Extreme Beer
event held on the 15th May at
the Civic Centre will be hosted
by the award-winning journalist
Alastair Gilmour with some of the
most exciting varieties of Britain’s
national drink.
But if Gin’s your thing then head
to the Botany of Gin event at the
Centre for Life at 7.15pm and join
in the gin tasting.
Last but by no means least, on
the 10th May from 12pm-5pm
head to the Quayside for the
Sunday market and witness the
unmissable spectacle of a 100
metre afternoon tea table bridging
the River Tyne for the Mad
Hatter’s Tea Party.
Seating over 300 people and
covered with over-the-top food
from around Newcastle - revision
just isn’t a good enough excuse
not to go!
To check out the other lipsmacking events and to get
more
details
visit
www.
newcastlegateshead.com/
events/ or join the Eat! Facebook
group.
Aimee Philipson
Mini-Ents - stuff to keep you occupied after your weekly guide’s gone...
Ghost Hunt
Shut Yr Face!
Evolution Unsigned
16th May
@ Tyneside Cinema
16th May
@ The End
22nd May
Across Ouseburn Valley
Join other spook-seekers with
a professional ghost hunter to
check out the previous monastryground’s ghouls.
Launch of the first Femdisco in
the tune. Expect cakes, fanzines
and grrrl rock for a tiny £3
Saturday night entry.
Whilst the rest of the city mourn
the selling out of the main festival,
head to Ouseburn for a whopping
24 acts on 6 stages, completely
and utterly free of charge.
reviews & comment
2Many Rooms
Break Dancing Convention
27-28th May, 7.30pm
@ Theatre Royal
Mass
urban-dancing
from
world-renowned talents, plus
workshops in graffiti, street art
and breakdancing.
Newcastle Community
Green Festival
6th-7th June, @ Leazes Park
The perfect excuse to visit the
park, especially if Ricky Road
or Castle Leazes based. Unique
attractions, music and food - all
completely free!
How the new Union night went down from behind the decks...
The proposition went something
like this: with their previous night
Unite having never quite taken
off, the Union brains decided that
a decisive re-launch was in order.
As such, 2ManyRooms was
born; a new Friday night with
better-known DJs (with Born in
the 80s in the main room and Sully
from Inertia in Basement 2) and a
cheaper drinks policy.
But…that just wasn’t enough.
Something else was needed to
really sell the night to the masses.
And that brings us nicely (if
somewhat arrogantly) to the NSR
suite in the Green Room, where
DJs from our very own student
station spin an electric range of
tunes from 10pm till 3am every
Friday.
In need of someone to kick
the party off early on, my radio
comrade, one Gordon Bruce, and I
were recruited to play a set for the
first hour and put forth the NSR
cause.
So with a certain sense of
trepidation, we found ourselves
in the wilds of our union, with a
set of alternative, up-to-date party
classics for the more discerning
hipster ready to roll out for the
Green Room massive (ahem). And
now, to give you the low-down
on our set, here’s my esteemed
colleague – Mr. Bruce.
As incredibly inexperienced DJs,
we took to the stage expecting to
go down like 50 Cent at Reading.
However, after figuring out
how to work the machine (with
no crossfade even!), a crowd
gathered.
Whether this was due to the
intimidating emptiness of the
basement at this point in time or
because of our music, we’ll never
know.
But what was apparent was that
the crowd were getting down and
dirty to a diverse mix of tunes
varying from The Big Pink to Boys
Noize.
Some not-at-all pre-prepared
mixes (hey, it was our first time…)
saw M83 seeping into Deadmau5
and Soulwax fit like a musical
jigsaw into Mr Scruff.
Things eventually went smoothly
enough that we began twiddling
around with knobs to make it
seem we knew what we were
doing. Only one slip-up with a
wrong track later (Mark will blame
me, but I blame him!) we reached
the finale with the festival that is
Animal Collective’s Brothersport,
and left it to Eliza Lomas and her
thrilling Balkan Beats, just one of
NSR’s many dazzling DJs.
2manyrooms seems to finally
have broken the awful track record
the Union has for club nights, and
Mark and I were only too glad to
be a part of it.
Mark Corcoran-Lettice &
Gordon Bruce
C
M
Y
K
31
[email protected]
CULTURE
4th May 2009
reviews & comment
Ents
Ambitions...
A selection of Ents writers from all walks of university life muse upon the
Newcastle-related activities they just can’t leave the year without conquering.
Freshers
Ricky Road is (and always will be)
a unique microcosm of libertarian
student life.
It’s a place where crockery theft
is acceptable and rife; bed-rattling
techno at 4am is a standard nightly
disturbance; the background party
buzz helps you work and silence
is a forgotten phenomena.
Being a Fresher is your last
chance to express your immaturity
in its entirety, and there are some
things that have to be done before
the Mondeos arrive and it’s time
to leave:
Second Year
Right, so somehow first year has
been and gone. Now your results
actually count. And being hung
over in the middle of a seminar is
actually quite annoying.
But there are still ways to have
fun. I’m pretty sure I managed
it anyway, so I thought it would
be good to share some do’s and
don’ts of second year.
So firstly, since exams are
looming, and gin don’t mix
so good with essays; do go to
Jesmond Dene. I haven’t tested
the wireless or whatever, and I’m
pretty certain there’s no sockets
to plug into, but it’s a beautiful
place, calm, and so, so green.
You could visit the goats at Pets
Corner between a spot of Chaucer
or Donne, and perhaps go spy a
waterfall whilst browsing over
Final Year
I never heard anyone start a story
with the words “do you know
what I didn’t do the other day?”
The thing is, three years will
go by whether you like it or not
and it’s up to you to take on new
experiences as they come, before
they go.
I have tried my hardest to say
‘yes’ at every possibility (thank
you Danny Wallace) throughout
my university career, and I have
no regrets, just a whole load of
stories about good times shared
with great people. I hope you don’t
mind if I decant some advice for
those of you who would rather sit
at home and watch the Hollyoaks
omnibus...
- Get involved in a society or
sports team... being part of a team
is the best way to make friends,
FACT. Everyone has their own
strengths (sporting ability, artistic
talent... whatever) and there are
societies to match every character.
- Make some local mates... for me
it was playing rugby with Seghill,
a local Geordie team full of miners’
sons. I have had such a great time
with those lads, and although it
gets a little rowdy (being branded
with the bottom of a heated beer
can for example) those are the
sorts of stories you will tell your
granny when she asks what the
Grey’s Anatomy.
Do go to Tyneside cinema; it’s
a quirky building, has a super
cute café attached, and is the only
cinema I’ve ever heard of that
hosts a ghost hunt. Apparently,
it’s built on the site of a former
monastery on Pilgrim street; and
has been the site of many spooky
sightings.
Also, if you do follow my do,
then also join Modlang Soc; for
amongst all the other activities
the society offers you, you can
get entry to Tyneside cinema for
a mere £3.40. That’s like the price
of a pint in some places. And
how long would that last? Well,
depends when student loans last
came in I guess. Potentially; how
long is a piece of string?
Don’t stick to your usual haunts
people are like up north.
- Visit the most beautiful bit of
Hadrian’s wall, near a town called
Once Brewed. It’s a 35 minute
drive west along the A69, and
the views are incredible... there
are steep cliffs on one side that
touch the edge of a lake beneath
you and the sloping woodland
on your right that dissolves into
a beautiful background. Then, on
your way home, stop by in a pub
called ‘The Swan’ in Heddon on
the Wall and ask for the carvery.
- Swim in the North Sea, there is
no excuse not to. Plus when, later
in life, you go for a dip down south
and someone complains about the
cold you can tut and say, best you
don’t go oop north then pal!
-Finally
I
would
really
recommend spending as much
time with your friends as possible.
You have all the time in the world
to grow up, get a mortgage and
change nappies. If you let a
university experience slip by you,
those will be the times when you
will wish you had been on that
night out, or hitched to Morocco,
or even been for a quite ale with
your good friend.
Ed Mansel-Lewis
- Steal & swap all your Flatmate’s
doors.
-Ride down the stairs on the
ironing board then protest at the
extortionate repair fine (plus the
added admin charge of course).
-Roof Chicken - two people
take a run up at the edge of the
roof, the first person to chicken
out and stop loses (Ents by no
means encourages such idiotic
tomfoolery).
-Wake up thinking your tripping
before realising your room does
actually have 7 walls.
- Pester your sleeping block at
8am during The 48shake – 48
hours where sleep’s for geeks,
eating’s cheating and water is out
of the question. Alcohol! Alcohol!
Alcohol!
-Merry-making with Cider &
Songs in the Laundrette.
-Cook for 20 blockmates blindly
drunk.
-Stagger home at 3am into the
wrong block with your universal
front door key, going through a
propped open flat door and into a
startled stranger’s room.
-Security Baiting – Your flat is
told to pipe down by security,
you move next door, you get told
again, you move next door, you
get told again, you move...etc.
-Stay up early enough to
watch the daily Walk of Shame.
Particularly entertaining after
fancy dress nights.
Excessive
noise,
pavement
pizzas & grumpy cleaners. I’ll
miss them all.
around town; to be honest even
if it’s an appalling night it’s
something to talk about and
it beats going to Didge’ every,
single, sodding Monday so that
you know the play list inside out.
Do check out some of the
restaurants along Brentwood
Avenue, Jesmond; easy to ignore
since Osborne Road has so much
going on.
But don’t go without checking
the Happy hour prices and times;
there are some major bargains to
be had. Avanti, for example, not
only has the cutest blue sparkly
lights, but offers a three course
meal for £7.90.
Oh and amongst all the new
nights and restaurants you’re
sampling, don’t ignore cracks in
your ceiling. Because it will fall
in. And a picture of your defeated
house will be in this paper.
Also,
definitely
do
take
advantage of the stand-by option
at Theatre Royal; half price tickets
on the day of performance. I got
tickets for an opera for next to
nothing; purely because I was too
lazy to go into town the day I saw
the tickets advertised.
This brings me to my next point:
Do procrastinate. Sometimes.
Don’t do it too long though.
Deadlines matter. 5 pm deadlines
however do tie in very well with
the Union happy hour, Monday
to Friday 6pm-7pm, £1 a pint?
B-argain. That’s another do, for
sure.
Oh, don’t take basement as your
only trebles bar, or think that you
have to buy three at a time for
them to be £2 each; mistake 101
much.
Also, here’s a schmall secret of
mine. Do go to Morrisons late at
night; because you will get a half
price roast chicken, and it will be
fit.
Finally, do not, under any
circumstances, go and hang
around your old halls of residence
boasting to the unsuspecting first
years what an amazing first year
you had, and exactly what went
on in what is their home now. It’s
really annoying, and I definitely
only did it once...
Jake Aiken Winter
Hannah Price
32
4th May 2009
CULTURE
[email protected]
THREE pages of Film, 14 articles written by my top journo’s and one naked and wet Hugh Jackman - no, this is not a sex dream, it is the FINAL issue of Film for
08-09. So this is it. The LAST issue. Before I descend into tears and go on hunger strike (well let’s face it, that isn’t likely to happen...) I want to write you all a
fond farewell and keep it as dignified as possible. So, emotional incontinence aside, what a cracker of a section we have as a finale!
We have our final set of reviews for this week’s celluloid offerings, plus a retrospect on the year we have seen, not to mention a fabulous preview of some of
the films to come this spring/summer. Engorge on our musings on Slumdog Millionaire, delight in a dash of Danny Boyle and join in the love fest for jolly old
Kate Winslet.
As for me, I will not be spending the summer worrying about resits, recessions and swine flu (!), I will be a-hopping along to the cinema for some cine-tastic
beauties such as Transformers 2, Harry Potter, Public Enemies and Ice Age 3... and I’m really hoping the third installment doesn’t reduce me to tears like the second
one. You should know by now, gentle readers, how pathetic I really am.
Anyway, I must now bid you all goodbye, and thank you all for following my attempts to run this little section (which I am going to miss a lot). I leave you in
the most capable hands next year... and who knows, you might see me lurking around the paper next year too...
TTFN, Ashley xx
reviews
X-Men
Origins:
Wolverine
Director: Gavin Hood
Cast: Hugh Jackman, Liv Shrieber,
Ryan Reynolds
X-Men Origins is a prequel which
offers an explanation of the
‘origins’ of the ultimate anti-hero
Logan/Wolverine.
Colonel William Stryker head of
the infamous ‘Weapon X’ program,
drives the story forwards by
manipulating the pair of outcast
mutants, compelling them to join
his league. Logan and Creed (half
brothers who have lived through
four wars) join a motley crew of
mutants to form a special unit
to fight for America’s interests,
State of Play
Director: Kevin Mcdonald
Cast: Russell Crowe, Helen Mirren,
Rachel McAdams, Ben Affleck.
Russell Crowe leads an all star cast,
playing investigative journalist
Cal McAffrey in this intelligent
crime thriller.
The film, based on Paul Abbot’s
2003 BBC drama by the same
name, is moved to Washington,
where the death of a rising
congress man’s (Ben Affleck)
mistress causes a publicity frenzy.
The movie has stayed true to the
Beeb’s original production and its
I Love
You, Man
Director: John Hamburg
Cast: Paul Rudd, Rashida Jones,
Jason Segal and J.K Simmons
Peter
Klaven
(Rudd)
and
Californian realtor Zooey (Jones)
are about to get married, and as the
couple start to make the wedding
preparations, Zooey asks Peter
one important question “who is
going to be our best man”?
What for some may be a simple
question with a straight forward
answer, the question proves to
be somewhat difficult for Peter to
respond to as he suddenly realises
that he doesn’t really have many
Observe
and Report
Director: Jody Hill
Cast: Seth Rogen, Anna Faris, Ray
Liotta
Loser security guard trying to
prove that he’s useful? Sounds
like Paul Blart: Mall Cop, and
essentially it is, but with lots of
violence and bad language.
Seth Rogen plays an overweight
security guard trying to catch
a pervert that runs around his
mall flashing women, whilst
desperately trying to win the
heart of a self-interested blonde
whatever they may be.
Logan and Creed become
increasingly at odds with one
another until Logan walks out on
the unit in search of the quiet life.
He finds temporary relief and a
love interest in the Canadian Alps
but his past was bound to catch up
with him as he is drawn back into
battle with his half brother.
The performance of Jackman is
one of the highlights of the film.
He plays a truly likeable character
with a powerful screen presence.
Schrieber’s performance is equally
good as his vicious nature and
menace shines through.
However the other characters
in the film seem to simply appear
as a plot device. This is especially
true with the fleeting appearance
of the character Gambit, which
seemed an opportunity to tick off
another character from the list.
The production also boasts
accomplished director in the form
of Gavin Hood whose talent in
characterisation is clearly on show
throughout the film. Xmen Origins
is a well crafted film which has
evocative use of cinematography
to display the beautiful backdrops
of New Zealand and the Canadian
Alps.
The first half of the film is
thoroughly enjoyable to watch
as the action sequences and
development
of
Wolverines
character draw you in. However the
second half is more disappointing
as it gets lost in narrative twists
and various plot holes. However
none of this really matters as it is
an action film at heart and is very
entertaining.
Hollywood revamp is kept low
key.
More then anything State of
Play is a shout out to the press
in a culture which increasingly
suspects their dishonesty. The
film makes a conscience point
of promoting the validity of
newspapers today by its focus
upon a dwindling Washington
paper: once concerned with
seeking the truth, internet blogs
now force the paper into releasing
half researched articles to press,
just to claim sales.
Rachel McAdams plays blogger
Della Frye, who has conformed
to this gossip driven, speculative
journalism. Taken under Cal’s
wing, she is taught the value of
old school reporting. Crow plays
his usual ‘good guy fighting
corruption,’ working out in the
field to build a tight case and
using official contacts he has
spent a life time building. The pair
soon shed light upon a possible
conspiracy when the death of
this woman is linked with a
murder investigation. This all
starts to point towards corruption
within the private defence system
culminating in a race against
time as the involvement of the
Washington Police force give
Cal and his team a deadline of
eight hours in which to get their
breaking story to press.
The plot is well executed and
as good as any conspiracy based
male friends. The film therefore is
an account of his ‘quest’ to find a
new friend and dub them to be best
man at his wedding. After filtering
through a few random men
thanks to man dating websites, he
stumbles across Sydney (Segal) at
an open house he is hosting and
the rest is history.
Sydney shows him another side
to life that he never knew and
the importance of having “man”
time. Unfortunately for Zooey
Peter’s new found friendship
seems to be having a toll on
their relationship and puts a lot
of things into perspective. Peter
in turn questions this friendship
and the two make an important
decision that changes the course
of their friendship.
I thought that this film was
really good and I definitely do
recommend it! In my opinion, it
has been a long time since there
has been a good comedy that
makes you laugh, cringe and also
feel sorry for the protagonist.
John Hamburg also directed
Along came Polly and co wrote
Zoolander, and his style of directing
is so prominent in this film. If you
are a fan of those other movies I
highly recommend that you go
and see this one.
who works in the cosmetics bit.
A police detective who takes
over the case soon hampers his
investigation and, subsequently,
he tries to fulfil lofty dreams of
becoming a real cop himself.
Helping him along the way he has
a Hispanic right hand man who
isn’t funny and two gun obsessed
Asian twins who are.
Rogen’s
performance
is
fine, but he suits playing the
underachieving stoner a lot more
than the complete loser he plays
here.
He has a bi-polar personality
disorder, so he has ideas above his
station about how important he
and his job are and his inability to
see his massive personality flaws
just make him very annoying
like the kid you steered clear of
at school. You spend the whole
film wondering whether to laugh
or just feel sorry for him. Luckily
Rogen is a funny actor and you
will laugh, but it’s a shame the
film wasn’t written by him.
Not unlike 40 Year Old Virgin
and Knocked Up the comedy relies
on that brand of humour and
also some unexpected flashes
of comedy-violence to get the
audience chuckling, but it gets lost
somewhere between the action
comedy it wants to be and the low
brow humour that worked so well
in those films.
Ray Liotta plays a two dimensional
character with no surprises which
Matt Waddingham
thriller. Although there’s nothing
new or particularly spectacular
about it, after a slow start it does
build to culminate into the kind
of suspense that had me watching
through squinted eyes. In addition,
Ben Affleck is finally provided
with a credible comeback role
after years in the wilderness. Only
time will tell as to whether this is
a good thing.
Frances Kroon
Christina Renner
was a disappointment, but Anna
Faris’ blonde bitch is as good as
she could be.
It does rely a bit too much on
shoving violence and swearing
down your throat, which can
be funny at times, but gets too
much.
About 2/3 through the jumbled
narrative (and it’s only 85 minutes
long) you want it to end. In spite
of a few big laughs and some top
editing there’s not much there.
James Stubbs
C
M
Y
K
27
[email protected]
CULTURE
4th May 2009
The year that was: 2008-2009 in Retrospect
Film’s top writers tell you about their cinematic highlights of the year...
Becca Hodgson
Highlight:
Watchmen
Ah, another year of
filmage coming to a
close, a sad time, but
also a time for joyous reflection! So
before I shed a tear, I would like to
draw attention to the highlight of
the year so far for me!
Many an adaptation has been
released of late, and of course
with an adaptation comes great
anticipation and even greater
responsibility to deliver.
The
ambitious Benjamin Button was
worth the wait as were other
notable
literary
adaptations,
Revolutionary Road and The
Reader, but unsurprisingly my
favourite adaptation was of course
Watchmen.
My
venture
to
the cinema to see
Watchmen
was,
beforehand,
w e i g h e d
with
dread,
anticipation,
and the feeling
that if butchery
was
committed
akin to the League
of
Extraordinary
Gentlemen,
I
may
cry and attack the
nearest unfortunate person.
Thankfully, Watchmen completely
delivered, both as a perfect
adaptation of the graphic novel
and as a brilliant film in its own
right.
As I sat in the darkened cinema,
surrounded by a majority of
bearded men (think comic book
guy from the Simpsons), I was
ecstatic to see the panels of the
novel completely visualised on
screen.
My
favourite
characters,
Rorschach and Nite Owl were
performed note perfectly by Jackie
Earle Hayley and Patrick Wilson,
and even Silk Spectre came off
less irritating than in the novel.
And even though the ending was
changed, it completely worked
and I think it was a successful and
intelligent decision. The only bad
thing I can possibly say is that
my bum went numb, despite the
‘luxury’ seating received from my
pre-booked ticket.
Visually the film is gorgeous and
some beautiful camera work and
special effects have been utilised.
The opening sequence of the film
is stunning, and one of the films
biggest talking points and the
use of camera speeds in the fight
sequences are dazzling! After many
an adaptation disappointment,
Director Zack Snyder has made me
proud and proved himself adept
at realising the vision created in
graphic novels on film.
I myself shall look forward to
his next project and impatiently
wait for Watchmen on DVD!
Becci Sharpe
Highlight:
Slumdog
Millionaire
Slumdog
Millionaire
has been one of the most
interesting stories of 2008/09
with
unprecedented
success
by its makers, controversy and
challenges from some critics, and
an incredible sweep at all the
major awards.
Few of you will have missed this
epic film about 18 year old Jamal
(played fantastically by Skins
very own Dev Patel) who is one
question away from winning the
Indian version of ‘Who Wants to
be a Millionaire?’
From the slums of Mumbai where
he was orphaned, the film
shows Jamal’s incredible
life of survival with his
brother Salim (Madhur
Mittal)
escaping
some
horrific
situations
whilst
in constant pursuit
of the impossibly
beautiful
Latika
(Freida Pinto).
The first and most
lasting
impression
that has struck me is
Slumdog’s marketing as
‘the feel good film of the
year’.
What you get, of course, is two
hours of children being blinded,
prostitution, death and crippling
poverty before reaching the
closing four minutes of happiness.
The only real criticism the film
has faced is that it’s a tourism
film. It takes masses of American
and European audiences on a
trip through the poverty stricken
slums of a far away country
from the safety and comfort of
their multiplex cinemas. Huge
controversy has been sparked that
the film has raked in hundreds of
millions of pounds and yet its stars
are still living in shacks, if they’re
lucky.
This film not only explores issues
of poverty and the clash between
India and the west, it catapulted
them into the attention of the
world. For this, as well as being an
amazing story, Slumdog Millionaire
is my film of the year.
James Fairfield
Highlight:
Oscars
As a flawed as they are,
the most infuriating
part of the Oscars is
seeing the true winners walk away
empty handed simply because
they were up against films that
are ‘award winning material’, i.e.
something American or historic/
political and normally very dull to
watch.
But once in a while the Academy
does get it spot on and the winners
are rightfully rewarded for their
cinematic endeavours.
When the nominations for the
2009 Oscars were announced it
immediately felt like a let down
with The Dark Knight not even
being nominated and its world
class director, Christopher Nolan,
being denied the chance to get Best
Director, despite the film being one
of biggest grossing films of all time
and astonishing fan and critics
alike everywhere.
Yet when the big night came the
results couldn’t be better. Hugh
Jackman made an honourable
effort as host with a variety of
musical performances, though at
times slightly dodgy.
An American event it may be but
this year it was dominated by the
British, who scooped the majority
of the main awards, including Best
Film, Director and Actress, with
Kate Winslet dedicating her prize
to the late Anthony Minghella and
Sydney Pollack.
Seeing Danny Boyle win his first
Oscar (and hopefully not last)
was my personal highlight of the
ceremony as it restored my little
faith in the Academy knowing that
they are able to reward a director
as diverse and dynamic as him.
But the most nerve-racking and
touching moment of the event was
when Best Supporting Actor was
to be announced. Nobody doubted
that it belonged to Heath Ledger,
however history reminded us that
the result was still uncertain.
So when it was finally declared
that Heath Ledger’s Joker was an
award winning performance, the
scenes of joy and relief was soon
met by tears, as Ledger’s family
gracefully accepted the award. Thus
ensuring the late actor will always
be remembered and admired for
his contribution to film.
Adam Williams
Highlight:
Slumdog
Millionaire
Those not put off by the
overtly loud advertising campaign
would have seen what turned out to
be one of the most charming films
of recent times. While not exactly
the ‘feel-good’ classic the poster
suggested, it did leave a warm,
fuzzy feeling in the stomachs of
those who could see past the awful
promotional material.
The story of a youngster growing
up in the Slums of India may not
seem like fertile ground
for a western film but
versatile
director
Danny Boyle (28
Days Later, Sunshine)
creates a story filled
with
heartbreak,
tension
and
excitement.
Based on the book
Q & A, Boyle mixes
elements from the
source
text
with
his
own vision
to create a
film which
p a y s
homage
to
the
cinema
of India
w h i l e
making it
accessible
t
o
audiences
w
h
o
otherwise
would
not
see a film of this
kind.
B o y l e
manages
to
convey
the
appalling
conditions of the slums whilst
presenting a story which shows
that even those without any
discernable wealth will always
have hope.
Obvious though the outcome
is, the story captivated audiences
across the whole country. After
huge box office takings the film
swept the board at the
BAFTA’s
before
crossing
the
Atlantic
and
doing the same
at the Oscars.
Not bad for a
film that faced
a huge struggle
to be made in
the first place.
Christina Renner
Highlight:
Kate Winslet’s
awards
This year there has
been so many fantastic film
releases: Doubt, Milk, Slumdog
Millionaire, Changeling to name
but a few. We have also witnessed
the emergence of many break out
stars such as Noel Clarke and Dev
Patel and the world of cinema has
changed so much with more 3D
film releases.
However, one can not do a
summary of the year’s films
without talking about Kate
Winslet’s two performances in
The Reader and Revolutionary
Road. Firstly, I personally
feel that the performance
of April in Revolutionary
Road was a much more
complete one than that
in The Reader and if you
have not had the chance
to see the film I highly
recommend it.
Not only is it
her
second
movie with
Leonardo Di
Caprio, she
captures the
emotions
a
n
d
sentiments
of
a
distressed,
lonely and
unhappy
housewife
so
well
that one
feels a real
connection
to the character.
In
short,
the film is
very deep. In
true Mendes
fashion
the
film is a rather slow one, allowing
people to really relate to the
characters. In my opinion, that is
the true genius of an actor. One
may wonder actually whether
or not the Academy nominates
actors for their actual acting ability
or based on the fact that they
have starred in a role that was
not expected of them. This being
said, Kate Winslet’s portrayal of
Hannah Schmidt was second to
none.
As an ex SS guard who falls in
love with a 15 year old school boy,
she enjoys being read to (hence the
title of the film) and as the story
goes on we discover the sad truth
about her dismal past.
Without trying to give the two
films away I think that Kate
Winslet’s
two
performances
were fantastic. It was so rare that
British actors made such a huge
contribution to American cinema
last decade, and since 2000 things
have really started to change a
lot.
I do believe that Kate Winslet’s
name will be remembered for
many years to come and it is
great for her to have finally got
the stamp of approval from the
Academy after years of having
been nominated and not winning.
This was definitely her year!
34
4th May 2009
CULTURE
[email protected]
The Summer ahead: 09 Previews
Film’s finest tell you which films to watch out for in the coming months...
Frances Kroon
Harry Potter
and the Half
Blood Prince
It has been a long wait
since the release of The Order of
the Phoenix in 2007, but the 6th
instalment of Harry Potter is set to
heat things up upon its release this
summer.
Originally to be released last
winter, the film was moved back
to ensure less of a wait before the
final production in the series, The
Deathly Hallows, (to be filmed in
two parts).
Potter’s back at Hogwarts with
faithful side kicks Ron (the ginger)
and Hermione (the annoying).
But it’s not all potions lessons
and herbology, with the reality
of Voldemort’s impending rise to
power casting a dark cloud over
the frolics of school.
Harry, now equipped with the
knowledge he is the “chosen one,”
is taught by Dumbledore exactly
how he must finally defeat his
nemesis. The dark lord, (brilliantly
portrayed by a very slitty looking
Ralph Fiennes), is proving a tad of
a nightmare as he starts his attacks
of terror on the muggle world. This
more then anything allows for the
director to promote tourism in
London, with some smashing shots
of the Millennium Bridge.
Alongside this, Harry suspects
that Malfoy, acting on Voldemort’s
instruction, is up to his tricksy
ways and attempts to stop him.
This all culminates in a spectacular
plot twist. If you’ve read the book
as many times as me, I’m sure
you’ll all know what happens. If
not, you should at least be aware
from the films so far, that J.K isn’t
afraid of killing off characters.
Sirius is dead, Cedric is dead (and
killing off Rob Pattinson is
defo a crime): All I’m
saying is prepare
yourself for the
worst.
If the trailer is
anything to go by,
it looks sure not to
disappoint: the Potter
films have steadily
got darker and darker
and this one isn’t
breaking
the
trend. Yet true
to its form,
it is not
without
a cheeky
one liner
from Ron,
w h i c h
w o u l d
lead me to
believe the
film is not
without a
spatter of
J.K wit.
Joe Skrebels
The
Imaginarium
Of Doctor
Parnassus
Few would argue that Heath
Ledger didn’t deserve the Oscar
for his performance as The Joker
in last year’s The Dark Knight.
His performance was amazing;
sometimes terrifying, sometimes
funny, always mesmerising. So
to think that there might be one
last chance to see him in action is
something I for one do not want to
miss.
The Imaginarium of Doctor
Parnassus springs from the
mind of the brilliantly deranged
Terry Gilliam, and concerns the
eponymous Doctor P (Christopher
Plummer, Captain Von Trapp
himself), an immortal, one
thousand year old ringleader for
an unearthly theatre troupe, who
is able to take audience members
through a magic mirror into their
own imaginations.
Of course, this isn’t any old magic
mirror, the Doctor got it after
making a deal with the Devil (who,
in an inspired piece of casting, is
played by Tom Waits) and now
he’s come for his back pay. After
kidnapping the Doctor’s daughter,
the troupe embarks on a journey
through alternate worlds, joined
by the mysterious Tony (Ledger)
on a search to rescue her.
Sounds awesome doesn’t it? But
this film almost never happened.
With only a third of the film
finished, Heath Ledger, as we all
know, died tragically. Gilliam
toyed with ending it there and
then, but was convinced by friends
to go on.
As such, he enlisted the help of
Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin
Farrell to take over the duties
as Tony in alternate worlds,
each giving their spin on
Heath’s own performance.
Their fees for the film were
given to Ledger’s daughter
Matilda who had not yet
been added to his will, and
Gilliam changed the credits
from “A Terry Gilliam Film”
to “A Film From Heath
Ledger and Friends”.
So there you have
it, two reasons to
see this film: 1)
It sounds insane
(which
from
Gilliam
is
always a good
thing)
and
2) With this
much good
will and this
much talent
involved
in it, there
can be little
doubt that
this
will
be one of
the most
interesting
films this
year.
Pete Duggan
Inglourious
Basterds
As a film fan of
unbelievable sadness,
the prospect of picking just one
film from the countless cinematic
treats I am eagerly awaiting this
summer was not something I
eagerly anticipated.
Do I work with my critics hat on
and offer you The Daniel Day-Lewis
musical Nine, Scorcese’s Shutter
Island or even Michael Mann’s dark
gangster flick Public Enemies? Or
do I go all out fan boy and entice
you with the details of Tom Hanks’
hairdo-fest Angels and Demons, Sam
Raimi’s beautifully named Drag Me
to Hell or the new Terminator film
currently wallpapering my laptop.
In the end however I’ve chosen to
sit somewhere in the middle and
present to you the latest film from
the critically acclaimed and yet still
very very geeky Quentin Tarantino;
Inglourious Basterds.
Basterds, a long coming WW2 epic
from the man behind Pulp Fiction
and Reservoir Dogs, stars Brad Pitt
as Lieutenant Aldo Raine, a crazed
American war hero left in charge
of a convert mission deep in the
heart of Nazi occupied France. The
Mission? To kill as many Nazi’s
as possible, by any violent means
necessary.
Now for me, this film will serve
two purposes; firstly to live up
to the sheer awesomeness of the
trailer which I have now watched
more times than is really necessary
and secondly to prove to me that
Tarantino still has what it takes
to make a truly great film again.
After Kill Bill 1&2 and Death Proof
I think he really needs to get back
on track, and whilst I think there
is more chance of me winning an
Oscar than this film receiving one,
if it can just reach the story-telling
levels of his early work and achieve
more than just impressive visuals,
I’ll be very happy.
The film, which
will
premiere
at this year’s
Cannes
film
festival, will
undoubtedly
not be for
the weak of
heart;
the
plot and tone
suggest a rich
vein of dark
humour
with
gore
a-plenty
and brutality to
tip your hat at. The
film’s
tagline
is
‘You’ve
not
seen
war until
you’ve
seen
it
through
t h e
eyes of
Quentin
Tarantino’;
why
do
I have a
feeling
that could
be ever so
very right!
Becci Sharpe
Funny People
Set for release at
the end of July,
Funny People is the
latest offering from
the Superbad team. Written, coproduced and directed by Judd
Apatow (The 40 Year Old Virgin,
Knocked Up) this film promises to
be along the same lines, hopefully
still entertaining and not boring as
yet.
It is also said to be a bit more
serious, an interesting direction to
take on such a successful format.
It’s the cast of the film that
intrigues me, resident Seth Rogan
plays a struggling stand up
comedian trying to figure out
his on-stage persona.
He is teamed
with one of the
oldest in the
comedy film
business,
Adam
Sandler,
w h o
plays a
successful
stand
up who discovers he only has one
year to live due to a rare blood
disorder!
The two find themselves to have
one thing in common- a lack of real
friends- and so of course strike up
a close bond that benefits each in
his own way. So the film promises
a great ‘bromance’ between two
great onscreen American comedy
actors.
Both Sandler and Rogan have
origins in stand up so it will be
interesting to see how they fare in
this concept. If Apatow does his
job properly, he should produce
big laughs from them both for
this movie.
The cast is even better than
that with minor roles from
the always delightful Jonah
Hill (Superbad) the weird
and
wonderful
Jason
Schwartzman (The Darjeeling
Limited) and non other
than Eric Bana of Hulk
and
Troy
fame.
Securing the latter
two in this
movie is what
assures me
it’s got to be
a good’un
for a lazy
summer
day.
Becca Hodgson
Transformers
2: Revenge of
the Fallen
To get us through
the lazy summer months, cinema
land is releasing some marvellous
blockbusters! As, let’s face it, the
likelihood of a scorching sundrenched summer isn’t very high!
So instead of complaining
about the shit weather, escape it
and go to the cinema to partake
in some action sequels, such as
Transformers 2 and Iron Man 2!!!
Yep, those big metal robots
from another universe are back,
gallivanting around with Shia
LaBeouf
(which means Beef of
God by the way) and Megan Fox
(looking just as orange as in her
first outing)!
Now, I don’t profess that the first
instalment of the epic saga was
a prime example of filmmaking
at its pinnacle, but it was bloody
brilliant! Also, my childhood love
of the cartoon series extending to
the point where me and my brother
owned most of the action figures,
makes Transformers irretrievably
dear to my heart.
The sequel basically picks off
where we left our hero Sam and
his metal mates, with Megatron
and his Decepticons being more
than irked and returning to cause
more mayhem. Expect Optimus
Prime to sort it all out though,
amid shed loads of explosions
and tongue in cheek Michael Bay
humour.
The trailer for Revenge of the
Fallen showcases some even bigger
and better explosions, and the
titillating set piece of Decepticons
taking out the pyramids. Also, the
trailer assures me that Bumblebee
is back to full health! So, for some
action packed, special effects laden
fun, I shall be giving Transformers
2 a watch!
The second of my anticipated
sequels is Iron Man 2. It may not
be out for about a year, but still,
some things are definitely worth
waiting for. The sequel boasts an
impressive cast, including Scarlett
Johansson, Mickey Rourke and
Samuel L. Jackson. Be prepared
for more tongue in cheek action
and of course the marvellous
Robert Downey Junior! Yum!
Anyhow, both of these sequels
promise some ‘leave your brain
at home’ action for the next
two summers! So if you like
explosions supplementing plot,
go and enjoy!
C
M
Y
K
CULTURE
27th April 2009
29
[email protected]
Heath: SO! The time has come, it’s time to hand over the job to one of you lucky writers. This year has
literally been the most fun and a massive learning curve. Thanks to everyone who has contributed
and those of you who helped us out at the last minute on frantic Tuesday afternoons...oh and another
big thanks to the Culture team and Sam for livening up my life. Dave, you’ve been alright too....
Dave: Aww Heath, you’ve never said anything so nice to me. It is with a heavy heart that I relinquish
control of the music section though - it’s something that has meant so much to me during my time in
Newcastle. Life wouldn’t have been nearly as good without it, I hope you’ve enjoyed reading it!
Peace. Heath and Dave([email protected]) xx
retrospective
BOSS
It’s been a bit of a whirlwind year for us here at Music HQ, we take a look at
some of the highlights....
Timeline 2008-09
May 2008
Dave & Heath get the Job!
The masses rejoice.
The Halloween Issue
Issue 1
We spookify everyone’s
names, “Mark ‘The Creeping
Lettuce’ Cocorran-Lettuce”
keeps us laughing all year...
Just getting to grips....
we feature an interview
with Late of The Pier.
Festival Season!
You simply cannot
beat a warm can at
10am, followed by
loads of bands.
Stone Willy’s
Pizza Workers.
Nicest people ever.
Heath’s going
to Berlin.
She gets a holiday, and I
don’t have to see her!
Girls In Summer
Clothes
Man’s burden has
never been so sweet.
Issue 4
Last Issue
of the ‘08
We cover your top 10
albums of the year. Bon
Iver comes up trumps.
Pulp becomes Culture
Pulp gets all grown up and
we cover the first Culture
lead in article. Pip & Alex
have a crack at being funny.
Vocals with Pip and Alex
In our final week, the
boys say goodbye...
This is it, the Big
Alex:
Farewell.
If my words are
illegible I apologise, it is because
my tears are cascading down
onto the page, splattering into
puddles of inky misery. It has
been a beautiful relationship, dear
reader, between you, who I know
has read our words religiously
every Monday, and us, the lowly
scribes. How life will continue
after this column I know not, but
we must face the future with a
We’re leaving Uni
We get our extra
page of comment
and mourn the loss
of The Long Blondes.
British stiff upper lip.
Speaking of British, we are
starting up ‘Paul Smith Watch
09’ in advance of Maximo Park’s
bound-to-be-shite new release,
out to avoid in shops in the
coming weeks. So far we have
had three sightings of the lankyhaired-but-clearly-baldinghence-all-the-hats
frontispiece
to the band in Newcastle, with
unconfirmed reports of other
sightings reaching our ears
almost every hour, at a pace that’s
even outstripping the other big
news story – Swine Flu (Please
stop sneezing in my face manon-the-metro-who-is-going-todie). Send all your reported
sightings in to Ohlook,acelebrity.
Meh,it’sonlyPaulSmith@
theyboreme.com.
Pip:
So, this is my last ever
piece for the Courier, something
which has been a part of my life
for the past three years. Weep.
So I better make what I say
profound...um, OK then, failing
that, I’ll talk about stuff that’s
When do we start
learning stuff?
The Last Issue
We finish with
a bang, 2 extra
pages for a A
Festival Special!
Spring Gigs
Newcastle finally gets
it’s act together, we bring
you all the coverage.
Swine Flu
we’re almost certainly
all going to die.
Maximo park
Stop hanging around
gigs, waiting for people
to recognise you.
The Last Issue!
What will everybody
read on a monday
now, huh? A real
paper? Lame.
GASH
gone down this week.
Firstly, my iPod. It was called
‘John Locke’ after the baldy
bad-ass from Lost, and it broke
this week, which means I am
officially music-less. As I’m sure
you’ll appreciate, that makes
life about as much fun as being
a kid at Michael Jackson’s house.
Don’t act all shocked, he clearly
is. What’s even worse about it
is that for the next month I’ll
be stuck inside, forcing myself
to pretend to give a crap about
female religious poetry of the
seventeenth century, and the
only things I’ll be able to hear
will be my brain screaming
and my housemate listening to
Carole-Fucking-King over and
over again. Kill me now!
Secondly, Morrissey. What a
twat. He walks off from a set at
Coachella in California because
someone backstage was having
a barbeque. Morrissey – one
of those vegetarian who is so
righteous that you just want
to punch them (or is that all
vegetarians?) – said, “I can smell
burning flesh...and I hope to God
it’s human” before storming off
in a hissy fit. What a diva. I hope
it was a delicious steak which
tasted all the sweeter for pissing
off a has-been. Oh, you were in
the Smiths? Big fucking whup.
Do a Johnny Marr and start
making some good music please.
Alex:
I’m going to have the
last word, cus that’s what I do.
Firstly, I’m not the housemate
with Carole ‘Can’t Sing King’.
That whinny bitch (Carole that
is) is about as popular in our
house as Jade ‘Goodbye’ Goody.
Secondly, thanks to Dave and
Heath for editing the section this
year. They’ve done a boss job,
and have given us loads of free
stuff for our pains.
Wuvs xxx
Alex Bowell
&
Philip Copley
Student
Poll
This week, we asked
100 of you:
‘Hasn’t the Music
Section been boss
this year?’
Totes
100%
Whatevs
0%
36
4th May 2009
A Festival
at home
CULTURE
[email protected]
Download
Green Man
Metallica, Linkin Park, Slipknot,
Pendulum, The Prodigy
Animal Collective, Bon Iver, British Sea Power,
Wilco, Grizzly Bear
The seventh incarnation of Download
festival has had its work cut out this year to
retain the thousands of rock and metal fans
which annually flock through its gates at
Donington Park. The announcement of the
new Sonisphere festival at the beginning
of August (headlined by Metallica and
Linkin Park) has created somewhat of a
rift amongst the babble of fans in online
forums, meaning Download had to present
a line-up that delivered.
On its announcement the usual complaints
were voiced about the headliners by some
people but feelings were predominantly
positive. After all, a festival is not just about
the three or four main bands and with
some excellent artists further down the
bill, Download promises to deliver quite a
performance. With an array of bands from
Slipknot and Marilyn Manson through
to Pendulum and The Prodigy and then
on to Def Leppard and ZZ Top it seems
as though the organisers have created a
strange concoction of musical variation.
Although on paper it might seem odd to
see these bands alongside one another,
When you think of new, cutting edge
sounds, the Brecon Beacons in Wales
might not be the most obvious starting
point. But for one weekend this summer,
this mountain range is set to play host to
what might be one of the most engaging
bills of the summer.
Taking place from 21st-23rd August, it
began as a 300-capacity, one-day event
in 2003 but has now expanded to a
whole weekend for 10,000 people, and its
seventh incarnation looks set to be its most
successful yet. Perhaps the biggest draw
this year is headliner Animal Collective,
currently undergoing a remarkable
explosion in popularity (just prior to the
festival, they’ll be headlining the Brixton
Academy – now just who saw that one
coming?) following this year’s remarkable
‘Merriweather Post Pavilion’, an album
which saw them delve fully into electronic
textures and combine their avant-garde
leanings with pop hooks to stunning
effect.
They’re certainly not the only great
catch the festival has obtained this year.
12 - 14 June
Donington Park, East Midlands
21 - 23 August
Glanusk Park, Wales
there is diversity by the bucket-load and
I can see there being many satisfied fans
emerging from the alcohol infused haze
on Monday. Download hasn’t forgotten its
heritage as a metal festival though and has
ensured that at least one stage is dedicated
to it for the whole three days.
Other big news this year was the
reformation of Limp Bizkit after 8 or
so years in hiatus. In their hilariously
pretentious press release back in February,
Fred Durst explained how the band ‘were
more disgusted and bored with the state of
heavy popular music than [they] were with
each other’ and were therefore obliged to
reform. Thank heavens they have returned
once again to show us the way.
Joshua Wyatt
Acts already confirmed include one of
2008’s great success stories, Bon Iver, the
glorious eccentrics of British Sea Power,
the legendary Rory Erikson, alt-country
pioneers Wilco, the wonderful Grizzly
Bear, psychedelic warriors Wooden Shjips,
as well as stages curated by Bella Union
(home to Fleet Foxes amongst others) and
the Future Sounds of London who, under
their The Amorphous Androgynous alias,
are set to unleash a 7-hour showcase entitled
“Monstrous Psychedelic Bubble Exploding
In Your Mind” featuring live music and
DJ sets. With their environmental ethos
(it ain’t called Green Man for nothing,
folks) and diverse, inclusive atmosphere,
it’s gained a reputation as one of the finest
boutique festivals Britain has to offer,
with even last year’s edition gaining rave
reviews despite taking place during one of
the worst summers ever recorded.
With student tickets a snip at £99, Green
Man looks like the place to be this year for
the more discerning festival goer.
Mark Corcoran-Lettice
Evolution
Glastonbury
Dizzee Rascal, Mystery Jets, The Maccabees,
Friendly Fires, Boys Noize, Brodinski
Bruce Springsteen, Blur, Neil Young, Animal Collective,
Krafty Kuts, Erol Alkan
Finding yourself restless for the summer to
arrive, bringing with it the almighty British
festival season? Then panic no longer
for right around the corner is Evolution
festival. Held over the May Bank Holiday
(21st-25th) in various venues within
Newcastle Gateshead, this festival couldn’t
be easier to get to for us toon dwelling
music lovers.
As the North East’s largest music event
Evolution is continually growing in size
and reputation. With a crowd of 60,000
expected over the Bank holiday weekend,
the organisers are spoiling us with an
undeniably impressive line-up.
In the run up to the main stage performances
the Evolution team have put together a
programme of exciting events. Friday
brings us Evolution unsigned, which
sees 24 of the best bands from the region
across 6 venues in the Ouseburn valley,
performing for you, for free. Evolution
also puts on a number of talks at Northern
Stage which are, you guessed it, free to
attend! (Subject to advance booking) This
year’s star attraction is a conversation with
Geoff Travis, founder of Rough Trade
I once had a no-hold barred shouting match
with some douche who said that Glasto had
‘sold out’ and wasn’t ‘real’ anymore, before
professing that his personal favourite
festival was Reading. Ok, so Private eye’s
‘Royal Glasters’ feature was pretty funny,
but the fact remains that Glastonbury is
still the only festival that gives more than
half of its cash-money profit to charity.
Case closed.
Where else could you see Jazz all
afternoon, then catch Jay-Z, only to end the
night with 6 hours of minimal techno in
the dance village? Not at Reading/Leeds,
says I. The festival’s unbelievably eclectic
mix continues this year, with headline acts
from golden oldies Blur, Neil young and
The Boss on the pyramid, while the likes
of Animal Collective, Bon Iver and Fleet
Foxes show the festival still has it’s finger
on the pulse.
The
aggressive
identity-obsessed
ticketing system has put many off in recent
years, but that shouldn’t stop you having
a good time. That is, if you have a ticket,
because they’ve gone and, predictably, sold
out. Boo. Those of you lucky enough to be
24-25 May
Newcastle Gateshead
24-28 June
Worthy Farm, Somerset
records.
And so to the main event-the two day
musical spectacular that will unfold over
two outdoor stages next to the Tyne, one at
Spiller’s Wharf and one at Baltic Square.
The line-up includes world class acts
covering a broad spectrum of music, from
Indie to electronic, punk to rockabilly.
Most notably Dizzee Rascal, Mystery Jets,
The View, The Maccabees, White Lies,
Friendly Fires, Ladyhawke, Little Boots,
Nouvelle Vague, Esser & Imelda May.
The dance stage at Baltic Square is run
in association with Wax:On and includes
Dance Stage Boys Noize, Chase & Status,
The Count & Sinden, Kissy Sell Out and
many more!
Tickets were priced at £15 for both
days but have now sold out. Fear not
though, day tickets are still available and
priced at a very reasonable £9.50. For all
programme and event details go to www.
evolutionfestival.co.uk.
Don’t miss it!
Olivia Mee
celebrating the end of exams in Somerset
however, won’t take much persuading to
know that you’re about to experience the
best 5 days of your life.
A few tips to finish off:
1.The guy trying to sell you pills for £5
each that clearly have the words ‘nurofen’
printed on them isn’t cool.
2. Always, always, always take wellies. No
arguments.
3. My gran died while I was at Glastonbury
one year. Then I forgot until I got back
home. Needless to say, you’re going to
be out of it for a while, so don’t forget to
charge your phone.
Oh, and Oasis aren’t playing.
Dave Wingrave
Competition!
To win a pair of weekend tickets for Evolution Festival answer this question:
In what year did Dizzy Rascal win the NME Award for Innovation?
Email your name and number to [email protected] and the
first person to send the correct answer in will be notified asap.
C
M
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CULTURE
4th May 2009
37
[email protected]
Special... and away
Pukklepop
Primavera
Arctic Monkeys, Kraftwerk,
N*E*R*D, Beirut, Bon Iver
Sonic Youth, Aphex Twin, Ghostface Killah,
Deerhunter, My Bloody Valentine
20- 22 August
Kiewit, Belgium
Pukkelpop, one could argue may well lay
claim to the title ‘the festival with the most
bizarre name’, but one thing that cannot
be argued is that it truly is the people’s
festival, and puts it fans first.
Before the line up was even considered,
fans were able to log into onto the
Pukkelpop website earlier in the year
and vote for who they wanted to see at
the festival, and as a result the initial
line up has one of the most exciting and
diverse array of bands of any festival.
Already Arctic Monkeys, Faith No More
and Kraftwerk are down to headline, and
further down the list lies a mish-mash of
talent including N*E*R*D*, The Offspring,
Bon Iver, Grooverider, Opeth and The
Jesus Lizard, with many more to come: last
years festival had over 200 acts.
This is one festival where no matter what
music you’re into there will be something
that you’ll love! Whilst relatively unknown
in the UK, Pukkelpop is actually one of
the largest festivals in Belgium, attracting
28- 30 May
Parc Del Forum, Barcelona
over 150 000 people. However, with over 8
stages, the venues are never too crowded
so the atmosphere is always relaxed and
fun and, of course, there are the obligatory
fireworks to round of the weekend on the
last night.
Tickets are a lot cheaper than most other
festivals of this size and go on sale at noon
today. Whilst they won’t sell out straight
away, it’s better to look into buying them
sooner rather than later as they’ll start to
fly away when more and more acts are
confirmed!
David McDonald
If you’re looking to be a bit more
adventurous on your musical travels this
summer and you are lucky enough to
be on an exam free course, then a trip to
Barcelona should be in order, as the heart
of the city hosts one of Europe’s premier
festivals.
Taking place next to beachfront and
coastline within the Parc del Forum
complex, and with guaranteed sunshine
and not an inch of mud in sight, it boats
easily the most varied line up I’ve seen in
years – My Bloody Valentine, Neil Young
and Sonic Youth headline this year. The
festival has several stages throughout
the venue, which are curated by fellow
festival organises All Tomorrow’s Parties
and music zeitgeist website Pitchfork, and
will showcase artists such as Aphex Twin,
Ghostface Killah and Deerhunter; there
is also one of the final shows of the Jesus
Lizard reunion tour. Such great music has
firmly established Primavera as the music
lover’s festival of choice.
As with all European festivals, Primavera
is a more civilised affair than its English
counterparts, with the music not starting
till 4pm and going on till 5 in the morning.
The lovely paved paths of the arena
helping to not make that walk from one
stage to another feel like a task of Everestlike proportions.
The crowd at Primavera is also, I am glad
to say, notably free of 16 year old kids
drunk on cheap beer and cider trying to
be ‘wacky’, and 30 something investment
bankers coked up to the eyeballs getting
excited to see that cutting edge band
Razorlight that Hugo from the office
recommended as a “must see”. Instead the
festival is a mix of locals and foreigners
who all seem genuinely interested in,
and passionate about, music, rather than
a load or complete morons looking to get
absolutely destroyed in a field.
Andrew McEvitt
Benicassim
Rock Werchter
Oasis, Franz Ferdinand, Boys Noize, 2many
DJs, TV on The Radio, Gui Boratto
Coldplay, The Killers, Metallica, Nine Inch
Nails, Kings of Leon, The Prodigy
16- 19 July
Valencia, Spain
More of a pilgrimage than a music festival,
thousands of Brits descend onto Benicassim
each year, an ex smugglers cove whose
population immediately soars. Some fly to
luxury apartments, some shred rustbuckets
through France and students stick out
their thumbs and hope for the best. Once
they finally meet their Mecca they’re
greeted by a city of sun-bleached canvas
and, with 150,000 attending, it really is a
thriving makeshift metropolis with the
first rite of passage a ten minute walk to
the beautiful golden beach. But just like
any pilgrimage, enlightenment must come
through hardship- you must adapt to 8am
finishes to make way for hammock time in
the pounding midday heat.
If you can acclimatize to this environment,
Benicassim has a line-up to satisfy every
taste. Headliners will attract the masses
with stadium fillers Oasis, Kings of Leon,
Franz Ferdinand and The Killers taking to
the floodlit stage. Further down the list you
can raise pints and dance like a maniac to
2- 5 July
Werchter, Belgium
the electro streaked raving of Boys Noize,
the chaotic mashups of 2many DJs or the
ethereal minimalism of Gui Boratto. Then
there’s the dance-funk of Friendly Fires and
the soulful indie of The Walkmen to sweat
out the late afternoon heat to. And if you’re
looking for highlights, Benicassim is surely
the perfect place to hear the mighty TV On
The Radio perform Staring At The Sun.
Benicassim has come under criticism for
failing to acknowledge Valencian culture
by disregarding local acts, being dubbed
“Glasto-on-Sea”. So it may be a guilty
pleasure to listen to bands you could have
heard at home but with sand between your
toes. Despite this, even the coldest cynic
will be calling for Wonderwall with the rest
of ‘em. By the end you won’t just have had
the festival of a lifetime- you’ll have found
the musical holy land.
Gordon Bruce
If there’s one thing the Belgians know how
to do, (aside from chocolate) its festivals;
and of all the many festivals it lays host to,
Rock Werchter is the daddy of them all.
Now in its 35th year, Rock Werchter has
consistently managed to pull off a stellar
line up and this year is no different.
Whilst most festivals seem content to
settle for two or three headline worthy
acts, the guys in Belgium have managed
to cram in more than twice that, with
this year’s line up including such diverse
headliners as The Killers, Coldplay,
Metallica, Nine Inch Nails, Kings of Leon,
Oasis and the Prodigy, and this is before
we’ve even seen who lies further down the
playing order! Even nu metal comeback
kings Limp Bizkit have sneaked into the
line up.
Luckily, with only two stages there
are very little clashes throughout the 4
day festival, and every band is granted
a decent set time; this is a festival where
the quality of the music being played truly
is paramount, a refreshing change to UK
festivals that seem to focus more and more
on whoever happens to be flavour of the
week.
The atmosphere at Rock Werchter is a
decidedly more chilled affair than many
UK festivals, and contains a lively mixture
of people from across Europe (for once
the English are the minority!) Werchter is
bursting with green credentials too, even
laying on free public transport for festival
goers. It almost sounds too good to be true,
but there is one problem: with the Euro as
it is, the beer won’t come cheap! But hey,
nowhere’s perfect, and Rock Werchter
comes awfully darn close…
David McDonald
Happy Camping!
38
4th May 2009
CULTURE
[email protected]
Jefffrey Lewis & The Junkyard
May 4th @ The Cluny
£10
Everyone’s favourite anti-folk
cartoonist genius, Jeffrey Lewis
is coming to everyone’s favourite
venue, The Cluny very soon, and
he’s bringing his new band, The
Junkyard, with him. After years
of impressing everyone who
encountered him with a unique
combination of heart-rending
honesty and side-splitting
humour, he finally seems
to have made the world
prick up their ears with
his new album. ‘Em
Are I is a serious step
forward for Mr. Lewis,
featuring his always
captivating lyrics and
melodies alongside a
newly beefed-up
band sound,
interchanging rollicking rhythms
and slower paced shanties. It’s
one of those albums that you
just don’t want to stop halfway
through, just in case you miss
something; another change in
style, the end of the story you’re
being told or simply because it’s
all just so lovely.
It’s highly unlikely
that with any other
artist you’d hear
songs about glowin-the-dark
pigs, wanting
restraining
o r d e r s
against
sea
shells and the
inevitability
of baldness in
one night. He
might even
p l a y
previews
Graham Coxon Metronomy
May 18th @ The Other Rooms
£14
May 30th @ The Academy
£10
As Blur and Oasis prepare
to lock horns once more for a
summer of spectacular gigs, one
could be forgiven for missing out
on the release of Graham Coxon’s
incredible new album, The
Spinning Top.
In support of this new record,
Coxon embarks this month on a
small tour of the England, with
ample opportunity to see the near
legendary guitarist in intimate
venues. Concluding at our very
own Cluny on 18th May (just one
month before the man walks out to
headline Glastonbury), gig goers
can expect to see a solo career
spanning set, hopefully with
many of the new songs woven in.
Despite the slightly costly tickets
for a Cluny event (£14), the sold
out show will surely be one of
those classic, more underground
moments in the Newcastle live
scene.
As we prepare for another wallet
busting summer of festivals and
stadium-rock anthems, let us first
take time to relax and enjoy these
more intimate moments on the
smaller scale of live music. Blur
may be taking the city by storm
at the O2 Academy in June, but
Coxon’s first trip to Tyneside of
2009 should not slip by unnoticed
either.
Whilst electro crossover acts
are no new thing these days,
Metronomy pull off the Genredu-jour with style. Last year’s
Nights Out was met with
stunning praise for its whirlwind
of spiky guitars and colliding
synth all applied to the pop
scaffold. From the climactic
rhythms of My Heart Rate
Rapid to the buzzing saxophone
of Back OnThe Motorway,
Metronomy oozed competence.
Most importantly, there was an
underlying sense that they didn’t
take themselves too seriously.
This attitude carries directly to
the stage.
If you turn up at the Academy
at the end of May, what you will
witness may confound you: three
grown men dressed entirely in
black behind a gargantuan mass
of electronics. Plastered on to
their torsos will be what looks
like Ikea wall lamps. Safe to say
you probably won’t see them
on the Milan catwalks anytime
soon, but it adds good humour
to a band that already have it in
spades. To top it off, their pathetic
attempts at robot dancing will
always get a laugh. In a world
where every electro crossover act
can’t help but pout at the camera
on every photoshoot, a bit of
tongue in cheek is refreshing, and
Metronomy won’t disappoint.
some of his older material about
being raped by Bonnie Prince
Billy or a folk cover of AnarchoPunk band Crass. And that’s
what makes Jeffrey Lewis so
good, he’s just so interesting.
And that’s not “interesting”
in the sense of soporific, überliterate noise bands, this is really
appealing music, something
to listen to and enjoy for all its
merits, this is true artistry. His
wit is constantly there, bubbling
along as he sings, but it’s all
accompanied by the feeling
of a band having a good
time just making
music, and if he can
make that come
across on record,
seeing him live
should be quite the
experience. Come
to listen, come
to dance and
most of all,
come to enjoy
yourself,
because
that’s what
it’s
all
about.
Joe Skrebles
Stuart Edwards
Gordon Bruce
reviews
The Rumble Strips
Camera Obscura @ The Academy
@ The Cluny
The Rumble Strips stood
shoulder to shoulder, united as
a gang of talented, unpretentious
musicians who proved within
an hour their worth and appeal
to every soul in the room by
captivating and romanticizing
them in a whirlwind of strips
magic.
As a band they complemented
each other exceptionally in
terms of their rhythmical and
harmonious collaborative efforts;
which were consistently strong
throughout the entirety of their
set.
What was conveyed in each
song they played was that their
personality and visual presence
suited the nature of their
striped down musical approach
beautifully; it was an honest,
colourful and fun articulation of
indie pop which attained both
creativity and originality.
Most of the new songs sported
all the same melodic genius and
erratic rhythm as anything from
‘girls
and weather’, but
seemed
more
concentrated
and
focused; the most notable being
‘Daniel’ which was instantly
catchy.
The band clearly had a loyal
and dedicated bunch coming
to see them on this night, most
were the gaggle of sweaty, hairy,
pint spilling, top buttoned Fred
Perry wearing Ricky Wilson look
a likes at the front…..and the
blokes were just as bad. Needless
to say the Rumbles got the butch
mods feet tapping at the front
and towards the end of the set,
to much merriment from the
mods, lead singer Charlie
Waller
announced
“here’s
another
new one”; however
one or two became
extremely perplexed
and overcome with
sheer horror as he
began to sing the
words, “I’m the
only one tonight
in the gay bar,
but its alright,
its
alright…”
another catchy
one from the
forthcoming
summer album
‘welcome to the
walkalone’, no
doubt about it,
but a one that
halted much of
the male mod
bonding.
Simon Welch.
If John Motson were commentating
on the gig, he’d say that it was a
game of two halves. Fortunately,
him and his sheepskin coats are
don’t venture anywhere near
music venues. The only support,
Attic Lights, was as generic
mumsie guitar music as you’re
going to get. If your dear ma loves
anyone like Keane or The Feeling
then suggest these guys. So bland
they make a lamb korma seem
like the fieriest mouth-explosion
India has to offer.
And then Camera Obscura
came on. And we were all a little
underwhelmed – you hear twee
Scottish indie, and your mind’s
eye creates sun-tinted images of
cute skinny teenagers making
daisy chains, or something else
ala Juno. Instead, the band is
well old (at least over 30). But
then Tracyanne Campbell started
singing, and her cracking voice,
sweet but not overly syrupy
sweet, made you focus on just
how enjoyable C.A.’s music is,
and that’s all that matters. A
warming, charming gig, from a
band at the peak of their game. If
you missed it, go grab their album
now. This minute.
Alex Bowell
Twisted Wheel @ The Academy
It took Twisted Wheel less than 30
minutes and a mere eight songs to
show why they are set to be one of
the leading, breakthrough bands
of 2009. With their self-titled debut
album due for an April release,
the Wheel showcased established
tracks such as “She’s A Weapon”
and hit single “Lucy The Castle”,
as well as offering up new tracks
such as “Bouncing Bomb” and the
impressive “What’s Your Name”,
in a set bursting with energy.
The Oldham trio’s music is fast
and frenetic. Lead singer Jonny
Brown seems to possess the
lung capacity of a whale, as he
sings at brake-neck speed whilst
simultaneously thrashing at the
guitar. Only occasionally does he
take a breath for air, addressing
the captivated audience between
tracks. The band are a tight
musical unit, all in tune with
each other’s musical strengths.
As Brown snarls away down the
microphone, bassist Rick Lees
and drummer Adam Clarke
combine their roles in perfect
melodic harmony.
Think of The Who crossed with
The Clash, add some Mancunian
Swagger and you are somewhere
close to producing the music
generated by Twisted Wheel.
Expect to hear a lot more about
these lads in the coming year.
Samuel Campbell
C
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39
4th May 2009
CULTURE
[email protected]
releases
No Velocity. Those local lads release the follow up to ‘Apply
Some Pressure’ and ‘Our Earthly Pleasures’. Mark Corcoran-Lettice decides
they probably should have quit while they were ahead.
Maximo Park
Quicken The
Heart
11th May, Warp
Seriously guys, what went
wrong?
Before we dissect
exactly why ‘Quicken The
Heart’ is such a flawed record –
because, a few moments aside,
it oozes incompetence from
ever pore – let’s quickly review
the story up to this point. 2005
was an especially grim year
for British independent rock:
the Razorlights of this world
were storming the charts in the
absence of anything with any
interest, while the legacy of postpunk was being squandered
by legions of skinny-jeaned,
angular-haired dullards. While
not massively different to that
which surrounded it, Maximo
Park’s debut ‘A Certain Trigger’
was still a breath of fresh air.
Boasting a sense of intelligence
and wit severely lacking in their
contemporaries, not to mention
some superb singles, the quintet
did the region proud, and the
odd bout of regrettable bombast
aside, ‘Our Earthly Pleasures’
was a worthy follow-up that
found them some well-deserved
commercial success. And then…
well, this happened.
Opener “Wraithlike” sums up
most of the album’s problems
rather succinctly.
Whether
out of a fear of being labelled
sell-outs or an over-reaction
to some of the predecessor’s
flaws, they’ve managed to avoid
placing a single interesting
riff or hook in the entire thing,
substituting song writing for
numerous time-changes, each
more pissy and irritating than
the last. Speaking of singles,
for a band with such a good
reputation for picking them with
care, try comparing the instantly
forgettable lead-off track “The
Kids Are Sick Again” to the first
album’s maddeningly addictive
“Apply Some Pressure” or the
giddy thrills of “Our Velocity”,
and it becomes screamingly
obvious that something’s gone
very wrong.
There’s a few interesting tracks,
like the choppy new-wave of
“A Cloud Of Mystery” and the
snarling “Roller Disco Dreams”,
but they’re lone diamonds in
an ocean of total blandness,
or, in the case of “Questing,
Not Coasting”, just complete
shit. The album may be their
shortest to date, getting through
its twelve tracks in less than 38
minutes, but it certainly doesn’t
feel that way. Most of the album
sees them plough through on
autopilot, and half the time the
band seems bored with itself. As
am I. Not Good Enough.
3.4
Singles
Round-Up:
Clipse &
Kanye West
Kinda Like A Big Deal
Self explanatory. Hip-hop’s most
eloquent, intelligent and just
plain boss stars are back with a
tune to melt your brain. Even the
presence of a gay fish can’t ruin
it.
By far the most exciting thing
from Re-Up for a while.
Dave Wingrave
Morrissey
Banjo Or
Freakout
Upside Down E.P
11th May, Half Machine
Banjo Or Freakout is the curiously
named project of eclectic Italian
Londoner Alessio Natalizia.
On Upside Down, he’s opened
his laptop and peered towards
current
American
trends.
Consequently, this EP doesn’t
even remotely sound like it’s
been recorded in a pokey onebedroom London apartment.
Upside Down opens us into his
sonic cathedral, a vast space that
finds itself a unique mixture of
lo-fi Pitchfork idols Here We
Go Magic, the pop sensibilities
of the Elephant six label, and
the stargazing romanticism of
the latest Animal Collective.
That, and its damn catchy.
Later on, I And Always is
Natalizia’s greatest example
of the power of repetition. As
addictive as Panda Bears reverb
charged wailing, small squelches,
bleeps and whirls form the
backbone of this piece as it grows
its steady mantra to boiling point.
It would be easy to accuse
Natalizia of being a pitchfork
lapdog- and it is true that he needs
a slight change of direction to
distance himself from the legions
of Animal Collective plagiarists.
But in way that judgement misses
the point- as an EP, Banjo show
simmering, exciting promise .
7.0
Gordon Bruce
Gallows
Grey Britain
4th May, Warner
After 2006, Gallows had me
worried. Adorning the cover
of every music magazine with
a record some claimed to be as
important as ‘The Shape of Punk
to Come’, Gallows were hailed
as our musical saviours, even the
mighty Warner Bros. saw their
potential.
Yet whilst I appreciated their
refreshingly raw, urgent, and
downright insane live shows, I
always felt there was something
lacking with their recordings.
What was Frank Carter’s
response to my anxieties?
Well, he lured me in with some
brooding strings, only to punch
my bloody teeth in. Gallows
haven’t just found their sound
here however, they’ve found
their purpose, and that’s what
makes this album so important.
The music here, whilst strong,
is really just an accompaniment
to Frank Carter’s damning
condemnation of our nation.
Carter is uncompromising and
obnoxious in his nihilistic vision
of Grey Britain. He offers no
reasons, no hope; instead he lets
us know in the most nihilistic
way imaginable, that our whole
nation is ruined beyond repair
and it’s all our fault. Our only
option? ‘Cut our throats…let’s
fucking start again’. I await the
four horsemen with a smile.
8.7
David McDonald
Finale
A Pipe Dream
& A Promise
11th May, Interdependent
Reeling from the deaths of J Dilla
and D12’s Proof, Detroit’s rap
scene looked to go the way of
it’s auto industry. Then a load of
cracking artists stepped up to the
plate and saved the Dirty D from
meltdown in yet another sector
of life.
Rather a dull story actually, if it
wasn’t for the body of work put
out by said artists pretty much
speaking for itself. The latest
arrow to the bow comes from
former Rawkus 50 rapper Finale,
and it’s a rip-roaring ride if ever
there was one. In today’s world
of the all-conquering auto-tune,
rap seems to have forgotten the
place of the emcee somewhat.
But finale sure as hell hasn’t. He
spits pithy couplets like there’s
no tomorrow (he’s from Detroit,
there’s always about a 50%
chance that there won’t be) and
the eclectic, swirling, sometimes
verging on psychadelic, beats
never feel overpowering. Aside
from the occasional naff R&B
bits, it’s a proper gritty listen too,
full of scathing attacks on hiphop’s floundering state.
He’s not going to save it
though- Clipse, The Cool Kids
and Wale will- but he’s still
managed to produce an actual
album. Rappers seem to find that
difficult nowadays.
7.9
Dave Wingrave
Hot Chip
A Bugged
Out! Mix
27th April, New State
The Hot Chip boys have followed
in the footsteps of many before
them, notably Erol Alkan and
Felix Da Housecat, by mixing
the latest of Bugged Out!’s Mix
series. As with other artist’s CDs,
the mix is split into a “Bugged
Out” and a “Bugged In” disc
giving you a ridiculous number
of tracks to feast upon. This one
has an astonishing 44 tracks.
The first disc deals with the
house and techno you can expect
to hear them playing in clubs
around the world, dropping
cuts from Theo Parrish’s ‘Space
Bumps’, Gas’s ‘Nah Und Fern’
before picking up the pace.
The rest of the mix travels
between stripped back acid
with Armando’s ‘Don’t Take
It’, dubstep in the form of
Peverelist’s ‘Junktion’, minimal
techno with Mark-Henning and
even a sneak peek at a new Hot
Chip track; ‘Take It In’.
The second disc isn’t the more
restrained house listening you
might have expected. Hot Chip
have opted for more of a house
party feel taking in everything
from Hall and Oates to Dizzee
Rascal and even Fleetwood Mac,
literally romping through the
genres. This is an interesting mix
for those summer days.
6.7
Heather Welsh
Something Is Squeezing
My Skull
Fresh from condoning cannibalism
at Coachella, Morrissey returns with
yet another single from this year’s
‘Years Of Refusal’. It’s a furious,
frantic sub three-minute rocker.
As vicious and as funny as ever, it’s
the man on absolutely top form: but
really, how many singles is he going
to release off this bloody thing?
Mark Corcoran-Lettice
The Virgins
Rich Girls
I want to hate this band so much.
They’re a bunch of posing hipsters,
who have copied The Strokes and all
‘80s synth pop in one fell swoop.
Unfortunately, their music is so
bloody catchy that it’s incredibly
difficult not to like, this song being
an example. Say hello to the new
face of pop music.
Joe Skrebels
Kid British
Sunny Days
‘Looks like it’s just me, my beans
and toast’ is the line that sums up
Kid British’s debut single best;
it’s a very average tune for the
everyday, average kind of guy.
Unfortunately it’s something
we’ll have to get used to hearing
too, as the tune is catchy enough
to stick around all summer
long….
David McDonald
C
M
Y
K
40
[email protected]
CULTURE
4th May 2009
features
No Culture Icons
Music brings you a weekly guide to harmonic happenings. In our Final installment, Dave
Wingrave extoles the virtue of lyrics over pretty much anything else.
Words Matter,
Man!
My dad never was one for
advice. In fact I can only think
of three occasions where he
imparted any of his words
of wisdom, garnered from a
depressingly large number of
years of experience. And one of
those pearls was ‘ermm, Dave,
no fat chicks’ as we awkwardly
hugged/shook hands on the
first day of uni. Cheers pops.
But, that said, one of the
defining moments of my
‘difficult’ mid teens (angst
angst yawn yawn) was father
recounting how the first time
he heard Bob Dylan’s ‘Mr
Tambourine Man’ or, more
specifically, the lyric ‘forget
about today until tomorrow’
and it having such a profound
effect on him that he more or
less changed the way he lived
his life.
It’s interesting how lyrics can
so coalesce a moment, become
so permanently etched into
grey matter that they can alter
the very way we percieve the
world around us. But this is
not a ubiquitous phenomenon,
many people simply don’t
listen to music for the words.
Many prefer beats, ambience or
otherwise. For me however, the
ability to tie lyrics to music well,
to elucidate somethng higher,
something more meaningful
than the sum of its parts,
is the time when
popular
music
truly comes into
its own.
It’s
also
interesting
t h a t ,
when you think about the
creative process of actually
putting a song together, it’s the
guitar or the bass or whatever,
that seems to be associated with
the talent.
Oh Yeah?
It’s the bands or artists that
have been supreme scribes are
the ones however, that have
managed to remain at the fore
of the collective consciousness.
Take the undeniable master,
the consumate songwriter, the
aforementioned Bob Dylan. It’s
widely accepted the guy can’t
sing. He sounds like a vacuum
cleaner. His guitar playing is
interesting, as in ‘Hey Bob, play
another one of those tunes with
A, D and E in it!’ and his forays
with the piano have generated
mixed results to say the least.
But the songs! They just speak
for themselves. There’s barely a
word I can say about his songs
that hasn’t already been covered
in magazines, books, a myriad
of papers and lectures. Dylan’s
ability with words aleviated a
mediocre folky to the level of
‘voice of a generation’.
This has happened time and
time again. In indie circles,
bedroom philosopher-punks
Neutral Milk Hotel have
garnered much ‘best album
ever’ hyperbole for their 1998
masterpiece ‘In The Aeroplane
over The Sea’ . On the
surface a plain as
hell garage record,
repeated listens
reveal passion
through words
that has never
been bettered.
Without the
heartfelt,
a s t u t e
musings
of
frontman Jeff
Magnumwho
also
couldn’t singthe
band
w o u l d
without a doubt been consigned
to the bargain bin half of 90’s
American indie.
These achievements, while
unbeleivably
impressive,
are as nothing when the
importance of lyrics is
considered in the context
of the emergence of the
most
revolutionary
genre of them all, hiphop.
Rap’s ability to
convey thoughts,
emotions
and
actions through
words
has
no equal in
the
world
of music.
What it
l a c k s
sometimes in elegance, it more
than makes up for with zeal,
and, it must be said, prolific
output. Not just in terms of
albums or songs generated, but
the sheer amount that’s said in
every single song (the recent
Flying-Lotus led resurgence of
intrumental
hiph o p
The University
Experience
Mixtape
excluded,
for obvious
reasons).
Hip-hop, from
the beginning
aligning
itself
with the tag of
‘urban
poetry’,
remains the genre most
grounded in reality and,
through its mutation of
soul, blues and beat lyric
patterns, easily the most
expressive.
Oh Right,
They Do.
And for me? The lyric I may
one day tell my spotty, out-of
proportion progeny? Well, as
I’m the editor of this section,
I can big my own ideas up a
bit. The words that have most
stuck with me occupy the ‘last
word’ section this week. That
banal sentence, drawled
with an offhand sentiment,
was well and truly one
of those ‘oh maaa
gawwddd, this guy is
a genius, how come
no-one ever said that
before?’ Then I grew up
a bit and found that loads
of people had written tons
of books on the subject of
being. But hey, it was still
the little musical epiphany
that’ll stay with me.
Music has played such a huge part
in our university lives, affecting
nearly every aspect. Here we (Dave
& Heath) pick the 6 songs that have
meant the most to us during our
time here.
• Weezer – Say It Ain’t So.
Simply the greatest song ever. The
peak of so many drunken kitchen
playlists, boss in any situation, the
most fantastic halcyon song, the
best. Weezer, we salute you
• The Maccabees – Latchmere.
The soundtrack to first year, our
younger, less cynical, wide-eyed
selves didn’t go near a swimming
pool, but we danced like mad
things as we romped through life
in halls.
• M.I.A – Paper Planes.
Maybe it was her highlight-of-uni
gig at the other rooms, or maybe
it’s just the pistol-hand tamil clashrap, but this song has some serious
memories attached to it.
•
Justice
–
D.A.N.C.E
(MSTRKRFT Remix).
Yeah it’s a cheesy electro-fest, but
at the start of second year, when
substance experimentation was in
full flow,this really did sound like
the future. ahem
• The Fugees - Ready Or Not
This keeps cropping up in our
lives, at once a party tune and one
you can stick on alone to reflect.
Superb.
• The Hold Steady – Massive
Nights.
We once played this 7 times in
a row, drank beer, whisky and
smoked a whole pack of marlboros.
We felt so damn cool. And we were.
As Life-affirming as anything else
you’re ever likely to hear.
Dave Wingrave & Heather welsh
End Of The
Year On
NSR
As the semester is coming to a
close, NSR is there to keep
you entertained during
your afternoons in the
Library. Those without
exams or with a bit of
free time will continue
presenting their shows
even during the exam
weeks. So your perfect
break from revision
could indeed be a listen to
one of NSR’s many shows.
If you yourself are interested in
joining NSR next term, then keep
a look out for people with hoodies,
flyers and signs telling
you when and
were
the
introductory
meetings will
take place.
Till the end of term, NSR will
be DJ’ing in the Green Room for
2ManyRooms, come down to
dance to a wide variety of music,
it won’t be your regular cheese
(as you have hopefully discovered
the last 2 times), but just
amazing crisp, new and
old music.
Eliza Lomas & Solveig
Werner
The Last Word
‘‘How strange it
is to be anything
at all.”
- Neutral
Milk Hotel
42
4th May 2009
CULTURE
[email protected]
ALL THIS WEEK’S UNION, UNI & STUDENTLED EVENTS
To use this space to publicise your event, email editor.union@ncl.
ac.uk
MONDAY
TUESDAY
WEDNESDAY THURSDAY
FRIDAY
SATURDAY
SUNDAY
LUNCH BITES
A
double
bill
of
presenters from Japan!
Visiting Fellow: Prof.
Akihiro Kubota and
Visiting Artist: Yutaka
Makino.
NEWCASTLE
UNIVERSITY DOES
‘STRICTLY COME
DANCING’
Earlier in the year,
several
amateurs
were teamed up with
Dance Soc members to
choreograph and perfect
a routine, and will be
making their dancing
debuts in less than two
weeks...
STARRING:
Jimmy Greene (AU
Officer)
and
Iona
McNeil
Mark Levine (Football)
and Jenna Bell
Clair Herdman (Ladies
Hockey) and JohnHenry Till
George
Densham
(Rowing) and Cat Foley
Max
Cosby
(Mens
Hockey) and Megan
McCance
17:30 - 21:00
£6 student, £8 full
St. James’ Parker
MUSIC/CLUB
OPEN BORDERS@
THE CASE AGAINST
IMMIGRATION
CONTROLS
Lunch Bites is a series
of hour-long lunchtime
conversations
hosted
in Culture Lab, Space
7, featuring local and
visiting thinkers and
creators.
FREE
A presentation by Teresa 12:00 - 13:00
Hayter, a writer and Culture Lab, Newcastle
activist on migration University
and anti-racism issues,
followed by a debate
on the case for open
borders.
This event is part of the
No Borders UK INFO
TOUR, raising awareness
about the situation facing
migrants on the French/
UK border as well as the
organisation of a protest
camp this summer in
Calais to oppose the
current
immigration
system.
13th UNIVERSITY
BOAT RACE
This annual clash
of oars sees rowers
from Newcastle and
Durham University
Boat Clubs compete
for honours over a
1,800m course on the
River Tyne.
FREE
15:30 - 18:30
River
Tyne,
Baltic
Square
and
Gateshead
Millennium Bridge
FREE
18:00
Bedson teaching centre
SOCIETY EVENT
TALK/EXHIBITION
OTHER
DOWN
Compiled by Katya Chatterjee
ACROSS
3. X-Men character (9)
7. See 37. Down
8. City in Monaco famed
for its casino (5,5)
10. Electronic form of
communication (1-4)
15. Japanese capital (5)
16. Slang for short of cash (5)
17. Warn (5)
19. Indian city formerly
known as Bombay (6)
21. Popular comic character clothed in
red and white and wearing spectacles,
usually found to be lost in a crowd (5)
23. Type of beer made from hops (3)
24. Historical trick used by the
Greeks to enter the city of Troy (6,5)
26. Solemn promise (4)
27. Greek goddess of victory (4)
29. Joan of ___, French revolutionary
burnt at the stake (3)
33. One who practices yoga (4)
35. Protégé; also name of popular reality
TV show starring Sir Alan Sugar (10)
37. Meditation chant (2)
38. Career in reporting (10)
39. Type of dance usually
done to reggae music (5)
41. Event signifying the
completion of studies (10)
42. ‘Captain ______’, cartoon
eco-warrior superhero (6)
>>> FOR MORE PUZZLES, TURN TO PAGE 45
1. Asian country bordered
by Burma, China, Vietnam,
Cambodia and Thailand (4)
2. Type of coffee made with milk (5)
3. Cord used in a candle or oil-lamp (4)
4. Type of fastening material
that “sticks” together (6)
5. Actor awarded with a CBE,
known for his roles as ‘Gandalf’
and ‘Magneto’ (3,8)
6. Popular sci-fi film featuring a visitor
from outer space, made in 1982 (1,1)
7. Classic medical textbook
with a popular TV drama
based on its name (5,7)
9. Former planet of the solar system (5)
11. A crystal of snow; also
name of a chocolate bar (5)
12. Season running from May to
August in the northern hemisphere
and from November to February
in the southern hemisphere (6)
13. Smallest particle (4)
14. Well-known Swedish
furniture store (4)
18. Something given in
recognition of an act (5)
20. “The ____ That Rocked”, recent
theatrical release based on pirate radio
stations that existed in the 60’s (4)
22. Walled city in the
north of England (4)
24. South-east Asian language (4)
25. Killer Whale (4)
28. Type of Dutch cheese (4)
30. Wall-painting (6)
31. Natural pigment
produced by squid (3)
32. 5 American cents (6)
34. Another type of 28. Down (5)
36. Person licensed to fly aircraft (5)
37. Band known for their music video
featuring dancing on treadmills. (2,2)
38. Gentle run (3)
40. Woman who resides
in a monastery (3)
C
M
Y
K
43
[email protected]
CULTURE
4th May 2009
Newcastle University Dance Society (Alexander Wilson)
Tyne Bridge Abseil (Alexander Wilson)
The Hitch Society go to Morocco (Alexander Wilson)
Anti-Bad Protest (Alexander Wilson)
Christian Union Events Week (Alexander Wilson)
Newcastle Univeristy winning the Stan Calvert Cup (Alexander Wilson)
Christian Union Events Week (Alexander Wilson)
Two performers from the year’s many Home-Made Jam sessions
44
4th May 2009
CAREERS
[email protected]
careers & stuff
Graduate Profile: getting an MA
What was the route you took towards doing your MA?
Well after completing my undergraduate International Relations
degree at Newcastle I found myself
moving between a few jobs without
really having enough experience
from my BA to get the job that I
wanted I decided to re-enrol at University on a part-time basis so that
I could gain experience in my spare
time as well as studying International Development.
Describe your typical day.
Firstly I go through my emails over
breakfast. I run a speaker programme
on International political issues so
there is usually something to tie up
there, whether it’s liaising with publishers about potential speakers, doing some promo for contacts in the
local community or logistical work
for an upcoming event.
After spending the summer in
Uganda I have started a support
program for orphans who have lost
their parents due to AIDS so remotely managing this with an office in
Kampala and consultants in London
and Leeds takes up some time. I’ve
got two part-time jobs at the minute
as well so I would typically head off
to one of those for a few hours before
coming home, doing some yoga or
exercise and then hitting the books
for the week’s seminar/next assignment.
assignment in, balancing everything,
particularly the jobs can be pretty
stressful. When people tell me I will
need to get a full-time job when I finish, I usually tell them I can’t wait
for that as it will be less work!
What’s the best thing about what
you’re doing?
University is a place of great opportunity.
I didn’t see it as much studying my
BA as the social aspect takes up a
large part of your time for most students, but when you go back you really see the amount of things that are
on offer, people to meet and skills to
absorb.
I would say that all you have to do
to get on an MA is apply but to really get the most out of it you need
a mentality that you are going to see
these opportunities when they arise
and a motivation to grasp them.
I would recommend part-time
study as well as you get two years
to build up your analytical ability as
well as doing things in your spare
time that contribute towards your
CV.
Doing an MA allows you to read
very broadly and incorporate perspectives from many different sources so you can justify reading pretty
much anything. The variety keeps
things interesting and their is definitely a feeling of achievement when
an event goes well or something falls
into place with the support program
in Uganda.
Compared to a BA, you can feel
yourself being stretched intellectually much more in the MA course
which is a wonderful sensation.
...and what’s the worst?
It gets a bit hectic when I have an
What are your top tips for those
considering doing the same?
JOHN SUTHERLAND
DEGREE:
I graduated in 2004 with
a 2:1 in politics. I am
now studying for an
Masters degree in International Development,
as well as run a speaker
programma called the
International Affairs
Forum.
This week’s job vacancies
To apply
for
the
positions
below, just
call into the
Job Shop
and bring
along your
student
smartcard.
The Student
Job
Shop is located on the first floor of the
Union Society Building. Our termtime opening hours are Mon, Tues,
Wed and Fri 10am-4pm, and Thurs
10am-6.30pm. These positions and
many more are also listed online at
www.unionsociety.co.uk
VACANCY 5135 - PEER EDUCATORS
Job description: Required especially
for Evolution Festival 24th and 25th
May 2009. A few teams of 3-5 students are required to assist healthcare
professionals & get students & young
people to take a Chlamydia Test. The
test is very simple & easy - it involves
completing a short form & providing a urine sample. Most events will
take place during the day (9am-5pm)
in student housing areas & halls of
residence, but some will be in pubs &
clubs so evening hours are also available.
Person specification: you should be
outgoing, confident, able to get on
with anybody, interested in health issues and young people. You should
also be persuasive - someone who
can get any 16 to 24 year olds to take
a Chlamydia test, and you need to be
confident to talk about sexual issues
with other people. You will also be
required to attend a half day training
session with NHS Healthcare Professionals (paid). Although it is not required, this would suit students who
are pursuing a medical degree.
Length of contract: Casual/Ongoing
- Events throughout the year
Start date: ASAP
Hours of work: Max. 16 hours per
week - varies depending on the event
(mainly daytimes with some evenings)
Rate of pay: £6 per hour - peer educators; £7 per hour - team leaders/
supervisors
Closing date: Ongoing Location: On
Campus (Newcastle and Northumbria) + city centre
Apply by: Calling into the Job shop
for the application details when we
are next open
VACANCY 5776 - BAR AND WAITING STAFF
Job description: Required to work in
a bar / venue near the University, for
setup, service and breakdown of the
bar and service of food. Open from
11am - 2am each day; you should be
able to work at least one shift (11am7pm or 7pm-2am) per week. Anything from 7 hours per week upwards
available.
Person specification: Please make
availability known at application
stage. Previous experience in a bar,
pub or club preferred. Food experience desirable.
Length of contract: Ongoing
Start date: ASAP
Hours of work: Minimum 7 hours
per week
Rate of pay: Minimum wage, paid
weekly
Closing date: ASAP
Location:
Newcastle City Centre
Apply by: Calling into the Job Shop
for the application details when we
are next open
VACANCY 5789 - CASUAL GENERAL ASSISTANTS (SUMMER WORK)
Job description: Based in Henderson
Hall and the University Flats you will
provide a variety of general cleaning
and catering duties for various functions throughout the summer.
Person specification: Experience is
not essential as training will be given,
however a customer-focused attitude
is essential. You must be able to work
well within a team but equally able to
work alone and a flexible approach is
required.
*Please note that there will be an
open day on Thursday 7 May from
12.30pm-4pm at the Student Union
Job Shop (1st floor) to obtain additional information on applying*
Length of contract: June 2009 - Sept
2009 Start date: June 2009
Hours of work: Casual - As and
when required
Rate of pay: £7.51 per hour including
holiday pay
Closing date: 15/05/09 Location:
Henderson Hall/University Flats
Apply by: Calling into the Job Shop
for the application details when we
are next open
VACANCY 5757 - OUTBOUND
COMMUNICATIONS AGENTS
Job description: Working for the
Labour Party within the National
Communications Centre. Responsibilities include: outbound telephone
calls to meet Party objectives to specified targets and deadlines (including
fundraising, recruitment, retention,
member polling, voter I.D.); recording information and processing data
accurately; acting as mentors to and
assist with the briefing and training
of new Outbound Communications
Agents; providing fulfillment and
clerical support where required.
Person specification: Applicants
should be proud of their interpersonal
and communication skills and thrive
when working in a targeted and challenging environment. Applicants
should have energy, enthusiasm and
commitment to providing a quality
service to members and supporters, as
well as dedication and attention to detail. Applicants should also have the
ability to work without supervision.
Some knowledge of the Labour Party
would be desirable, though not essential as full training will be offered.
Length of contract: Ongoing
Start date: Immediate
The Careers Service:
helping you to
find work too
Hours of work: 12 hours per week evenings and/or weekends
Rate of pay: £7.26 per hour
Closing Date: ASAP Location: Gosforth (NE3 area)
Apply by: Calling into the Job shop
for the application details when we
are next open
VACANCY 5794 - NEWCASTLE
WORK EXPERIENCE SCHEME WEBSITE DESIGN
Job description: This company imports fine Italian wine and food from
small passionate producers and sell
them through their website. They
are looking to improve their internet
presence by creating a complimentary
website. The successful candidate
will design and develop a website that
will complement the current website
and will also market it to ensure that
the website will rank well in search
engines.
Person specification: You must be a
final year Undergraduate or a Postgraduate student.
You should have excellent IT skills
including knowledge of web languages (PHP or Ruby). Additionally you
should have strong design skills.
Length of contract: 5 weeks
Start date: June to August
Hours of work: 35 hours per week
Rate of pay: £1200 bursary
Closing date: 11/05/09
Location:
Sunderland
Apply by: Calling into the Job Shop
for the application details when we
are next open
The Student Job
Shop is sponsored
by www.
corusgroupcareers
.com
Yes, there are jobs out there –
and they’re just a couple of clicks
away!
It only takes a couple of easy clicks
from the Careers Service’s website
(www.ncl.ac.uk/careers) and you
can transport yourself to Vacancies
Online. The two clicks that I made
five minutes ago revealed that approximately 350 graduate and 115
work experience local and national
vacancies are currently advertised
there. You can search by type of job
and by geographical location – it
couldn’t be simpler.
When you’re bogged down with
assignments and revision, you
might feel it’s a bridge too far to
start trawling through innumerable employers’ websites, scrolling through recruitment agencies’
sites, or researching the confusing
myriad of competing graduate jobs
websites. The solution therefore is
a simple one; save yourself time
and effort by just concentrating on
Vacancies Online.
You can even create your own
profile on the site which means
you’ll receive an email each time a
vacancy arrives that matches your
preferences.
And the best thing is you can continue to access Vacancies Online
wherever you are in the UK or even
further afield. So if you want to get
your exams out of the way first and
then start looking that’s perfectly
all right.
Not only can you continue to access Vacancies Online after graduating from Newcastle this year,
you can also continue to access the
Careers Service website and get
support from the Careers Service
for 3 years following graduation –
and of course it’s free – so please
keep in touch!
To have a look for yourself visit:
www.ncl.ac.uk/careers/vacsonline
Margaret Barker
C
M
Y
K
STUFF
4th May 2009
...and it’s good-bye from me!
45
[email protected]
It is a Courier tradition for the editor to sign off his or her year in
office with a small piece reflecting on the highs and lows of running your student newspaper.
What better way to honour this tradition than to put yourself
through the gruelling task of answering the same tough questions you’ve has spent the year inflicting upon our favourite lecturers on this very page?
And so, with several decades-too-few wisdom, here’s my attempts to reveal what life and this year in particular have taught
me...
Soc, Northumbrian Soc and Newcastle FC Commiserators Soc
but I didn’t realise until it was too late - don’t make the same
mistake!
can stick to whatever I end up doing. I think on balance we’ve
done a good job this year of being ethical and neutral. There
have been mistakes but a lot of proud moments too!
If I could have a drink with anyone, living or dead it would be
Ernest Hemingway. I’d like to ask him why after travelling the
world, wooing dozens of beautiful woman and writing the most
beautiful prose of the 20th Century he still ended up blowing his
own brains out. I’d ask him if therefore I have all the wrong aspirations - and then get him to teach me how to drink absinthe.
“If I hadn’t become a newspaper editor I’d have probably hidden under a pile of coats somewhere and hoped everything
would work out fine. Being elected kept the ‘real world’ at bay
for another year, and made it less daunting now it’s finally came
round (well, a little less!).
Probably my single biggest regret is spending two years messing about before finally getting to uni and finding things that
challenge and satisfy me. That said, it does spurn you on knowing you’re playing catch up…
One thing I love about my job is seeing the various teams that
putting a newspaper together requires all coming together, from
the section editors in my office to their own team of writers. The
individual sense of pride you get from being a writer, I’ve discovered, isn’t hlaf as much fun as the pride you get from being
part of a good team. I’ve also loved
inflicting The Courier staff with
my taste in ‘comedy rap’ and
generally fluctuating between
stressed-out concentration and
messing about all week.
One thing I wish my editors and writers would do is call me
‘boss’ or preferably ‘chief’, just once. Also, I am fully banking on
one of them giving me a job at some point in the future.
The best age to be so far is roughly 22, or whatever age it is
after your teens that you finally realise the difference between
what you thought you ought to think and like and what you really think and like, and accept yourself happily whilst knowing
there is plenty left to learn.
One thing I wish I had known when I was a student is that
you can set up societies. I’d have liked to have set up Cheese
The key to happiness is not something I would claim to have
figured out quite yet, but for now it seems to be about growing with friends, learning new ideas and concepts and travelling whenever possible. In the future, I’ve always assumed it
would be about having children and watching them replace you
as Number One in your life, but I could be wrong.
If I could change one thing about Britain it would be sections
of press. One of the biggest challenges this year has been to try
and reverse our trend for sensationalising news stories and making moral proclamations... I think people should be given the
facts and allowed to make their own mind up. I’m not yet in the
‘business of selling newspapers’, but I hope this is a principle I
SUDOKU
You wouldn’t think it, but I’m
actually very good at throwing
things high into the air and catching them in my mouth. Nature
gives some people awesome athletic
ability, a soaring singing voice or chiselled good-looks. I got good mouth-wine
gum coordination. Not that I’m not bitter...”
Thank you everyone - and don’t forget to check
out The Courier next year when it comes back even
stronger! x
Sam Parker has been your Courier Editor, 2008/09
TARGETS
Compiled by Isabelle Douglas
1) Hallucinations
2) Hinders, Obstructs
3) Mythical fire breathing creatures
4) Dr Dolittle talks to the …
5) Indicates, Signifies
6) People who are scared of failing
7) Women’s bodices
8) What you keep clothes in
9) Sweet talks, Entices
10) Hints at
CRISS CROSS
WORDSEARCH
Paper
String
Tissue
Safety pin
Plaster
Money
Pen
Rubber
with Kate McCann
Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19)
The next few months might feel impossible
to get through but you’re up to the challenge and the rewards will be worth it.
Taurus (Apr 20 – May 19)
This week could well be the start of something new and exciting for you... instead,
you’ll be as bored with your life as ever!
Gemini (May 20 – June 20)
Your sunny personality and cheerful demeanour are what people love most about
you; keep smiling, even when things get
tough this week.
Cancer (Jun 21 – Jul 21)
You’ve been working incredibly hard to
impress someone recently... unfortunately,
it’s all been for nothing.
Leo (Jul 22 – Aug 22)
Secretly, you know you believe in love at
first sight. Take the risk and tell that special person how you feel, what do you
have to lose?
Virgo (Aug 23 – Sept 21)
Wooop! It’s almost summer and you’re
finding it almost impossible to concentrate.
Get your head down and do some revision
before that afternoon drinking sesh, you’ll
feel much better for it.
Libra (Sept 22 – Oct 22)
You’re the life and soul of the party but
you’ve been feeling a little neglected recently. Make some time for yourself and
don’t let people get you down.
Ruler
Measuring
tape
Stickers
Batteries
Moisturiser
Lip stick
Perfume
Thanks to all those who
contributed this year. And
Good luck to everyone!
Golf
Judo
Polo
Dance
Rugby
Hockey
Karate
Rowing
Skiing
Squash
Tennis
Bowling
WORD
WISE
Puzzles
Try fit the words into the
grid; But one is missing- can
you find which one it is?
Cricket
Netball
Baseball
Football
Lacrosse
Swimming
Athletics
Badminton
Ice Hockey
Basketball
Ice Skating
Volleyball
WORDWISE; Scientist
TARGETS 1Mirages 2) Hampers 3) Dragons 4) Animals 5) Denotes 6) Cowards 7) Corsets 8) Drawers 9) Cajoles 10) Alludes
ANSWERS
Edited by Caroline Melloy
Try fill in the
Target from the
clues below. Al
the answers are
seven letters
and end in a E
Horror Scope
Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21)
Romance is on the cards this week for all
you lucky Scorpios. Don those extra special pulling pants and make the most of the
start of summer!
Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21)
A mysterious stranger causes you to reevaluate your current situation, listen to
what they have to say carefully. Oh, and
ask a colleague out on a date... lurrrrrve!
Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19)
Fame, riches, adoration and successs... will
all evade you this week
Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 17)
You’ve done good recently, so stop being
coy and let yourself feel good about it! Just
don’t get carried away in front of a jealous
loved one…
Pisces (Feb 18 – Mar 20)
You will find your destiny at the bottom
of a waterfall this week. Take your wellies,
nobody likes to get wet feet. Oh, and listen
to the Ramones, destiny is a funny thing.
SPORT
[email protected]
46
4th May 2009
sport
Review of Team
Newcastle’s 08/09
Pages 50-51
Captain Carling
STEVE IMPEY speaks to former England skipper
Will Carling ahead of the Lions tour of South Africa
For those who can, set your
minds back to a different time in
international rugby; a time before
the professional player, before salary
caps, the Millennium Stadium, and
of course Jonny.
The astute voice of Bill McLaren
was in full swing, Six Nations were
in fact five, and a certain Will Carling
would lead his England side to their
first back-to-back Grand Slams for 67
years.
Separated by a World Cup final
appearance at Twickenham in ‘91,
and followed by yet another Slam
and another World Cup run in
‘95, the success of England under
Carling’s reign can only be topped
in modern times by the exceptional
achievements in 2003. The man with
the top job then was Martin Johnson,
a captain of different circumstance
to Carling, but a talisman of similar
acclaim.
Courier Sport had the pleasure
in speaking exclusively with the
outspoken William Carling – OBE
before I forget – discussing his
romance with English Rugby, the
time he became a Lion, and spending
his post-match retirement living in a
virtual clubhouse.
“My ambition was never to captain
England,” Carling said. “I just
wanted to play for my country, so
when manager at the time Geoff
Cooke rang to ask if I wanted the
job, my first assumptions were that
he must be joking. ‘No, really Will’
was his response, which I found very
bizarre since I was only 22 with little
experience of playing for England.
“I played in a good England team,
that’s why it was so successful. I
would probably say, out of the three,
my favourite Grand Slam would
have to be the first one in ’91. The
others were good, but at the time the
relief just to beat the French and to
play well without any issues, that’s
what made it so special.
“As a captain in those days I had a
lot more input in selection and team
building compared to the likes of
Johnson and others more recently. In
today’s game more back-room staff
are hired for precisely those jobs,
leaving the captain to play rugby. In
that sense I feel I had to be a more
vocal captain than those after me.
That there is a big difference between
the amateur and professional eras
for sure.”
Deliberation over the manner
in which England took to the
Twickenham field in the 1991 World
Cup final does conjure up questions
of the team’s leadership. Losing to
Australia at the final hurdle after
a change in game plan that saw
England turn to a more expansive
tactic, you would have thought those
involved may regret looking back on
the day, especially the captain. This
is not the case however as Carling
goes on to explain what happened
18 years ago as purely a question of
hind-sight.
“People forget that we toured
Australia that summer and got
whacked 40 points to 15. When it
came to the final we all decided to sit
down for a bit and come up with a
different way of playing them (away
from the usual English forwards
method). If we had taken our
chances on the day we would have
won. There are definitely no regrets,
we just didn’t take our chances.
“The quarter-final win over
Australia in ’95 was one hell of a
game. It was nice to avenge them
after that final, but then again you
could say for what end if we were
going on to lose to New Zealand in
the semi anyway.
“New Zealand had a very good
side,” Carling continued. “Jonah
Lomu was a great player. In ’99 he
was good, but nowhere near the
player he was in 1995. If you put two
or three on him to slow him down,
you’d just end up leaving holes
everywhere else.
“Zinzan [Brooke] reminds me
almost every day about that dropgoal, especially as I was the one to
kick him the ball in the first place.
To be fair to him it was just such a
ridiculous kick. It was a massive
strike. He does love it.”
A Lion in the tour of New Zealand
in ’93, Carling can look back on his
career and say he is part of a special
group of people, a select few to ever
wear the prestigious shirt. The hype
of the Lions tour that comes along
only every four years is back again
this summer, and who better than an
actual Lion to guide us through this
year’s squad selection, made public
only two weeks ago.
However, in old Will Carling
fashion, the man enlightens us first
of all with his own unique experience
of being a Lion.
“Well, I played shite didn’t I?”
said in a brutally honest temper.
“I would’ve liked to go on a Lions
tour when I was in some form. The
Lions is such a unique concept,
and is a very bizarre experience. I
thoroughly enjoyed it but was just
disappointed that I didn’t perform
the way I could.
“Going on a Lions tour is very
bizarre. When you play for your
club and national team, you know
the drills, you know the game plans,
and you can in some way settle into
your comfort zone. With the Lions
you can’t. You must go into them
with the right frame of mind, and if
you do, they are just an incredible
experience.
“I am disappointed at the absence
of Tom Croft in this summer’s tour,
and I do feel Delon Armitage was
a little unlucky not to make the cut.
But, you know, there are a couple of
good fullbacks going.
“As for Croft, I honestly thought he
would start the test game. He’s good
in the line-out and would be perfect
on the hard-fast grounds in South
Africa.
“You do have to be physical in
South Africa as well. If you don’t
compete with them in the front-five
you are going to struggle. I think
McGeechan has done a pretty good
job in his selection, he’s got it pretty
close for sure.”
In Carling’s non-playing days,
he finds himself heavily involved
in rugby still. Running his own
hospitality business Will Carling
Management Ltd, he is able to put
a different spin on rugby, hosting
functions post-match with some of
the biggest names in rugby, bridging
the different generations to have
mastered the sport.
The Rucku.com fan-site is also
a project Carling has taken on, an
amusing way to keep up to date with
rugby topics and debate, and include
a bit of banter along the way.
“It’s a rugby-bar-stroke-clubhouse
where guys can just have a laugh
really,” he explains. “It’s a site where
you can have a bit of banter, some
slander, keep up to date with a bit of
news, watch a few rugby videos, and
basically have a good craic.”
The no-nonsense approach to rugby
talk is what Carling and co. like.
The thought of giving their former
rugby colleagues a bit of jip while
talking rugby over a pint seems
the perfect combination. The belief
that somewhere preserved inside,
everyone still has the excitable boy
who began his days playing rugby.
While keeping rugby light-hearted,
more will surely want to follow it.
Falcons breed new life as regulars make farewells
Steve Impey
After a season of imbalance the
Newcastle Falcons team will be
freshening-up in the coming months,
as new exciting imports eye up their
fortunes here in the North East, while
others venture away in search of new
challenges elsewhere.
The biggest of all speculation
however has to be the whereabouts
of Jonny Wilkinson’s future next
season, with a move to French side
Toulon well and truly on the cards.
Tom May is one definitely making
the trip across the channel, ending his
tenure with the club in the position
injury struck Wilko used to entertain
the Geordie faithful. Captain Dowson
signs the deal that sees him become a
Northampton Saint next season.
Andy Buist will be at London Irish
while Geoff Parling becomes a Tiger,
and Russell Winter calls it a day
announcing his retirement to a proud
career which saw the former South
African A captain join the Falcons
back in 2006.
Amid the departures of those
named and the possibility of a few
others to follow, Steve Bates hasn’t
resigned to leaving the side short in
numbers next term. Samoan captain
Fellipo Levi joins Tongan flanker
Josh Afu at the Falcons for the next
two years, strengthening the backrow with an abundance of experience
and a massive physical presence.
“I’ve
always
admired
the
Premiership,” Levi said. “My eyes
have been opened to European rugby
with my time at the Ospreys, a level
I believe the Newcastle Falcons can
achieve hopefully in the next year or
two.”
James Hudson reciprocates the
move of Buist, joining the Falcons
from London Irish as Steve Bates
seeks to build power up front as well
as strength in depth ahead of next
season.
“We believe the players we have
signed have a big future at the club,”
Falcons’ Rugby Director announced.
“We’ve lost a great servant in Phil
Dowson but at the same time have
acquired an international captain
with great experience.
“However, we’re not changing the
team wholesale. We’ve had a good
season just gone, especially in the
games away to Wasps and here to
Bath. These games stand out I feel
since our performances prove we are
capable in competing with teams at
that level.”
After the indecent start to the season,
the Falcons came into the new year
with a improved confidence, winning
seven out of their last eleven, which
include victories over the league’s
top two finishers Leicester and
Harlequins, and a win at Franklin’s
Gardens to end Northampton’s twoyear unbeaten streak at home.
The returning Carl Hayman was
inspirational too, finding some of the
form he played with as an All Black.
But the biggest story would definitely
have to be of make-shift fly-half Tom
May, proving he has the composure
of boot as well as the sleight of hand
in the season’s final months.
After admitting to a few tears before
his last outing at Kingston Park, May
wishes the team all the best and
expresses his desire to possibly play
again for the club sometime in his
rugby future.
“Newcastle has been a fantastic club
to me and I’ve had an unforgettable
experience growing up with the guys
here.
“Hopefully the wife and I can make
the most of a few years abroad and
maybe make a return one day. I’ve
been married into the Geordie race
so I would love to come back.”
Another season has come and gone
and players’ futures are again in the
balance. But with fresh-blood in the
Kingston Park side, a revolutionised
Falcons team can breathe renewed
success come September; in a new
Guinness Premiership season that is
never far away.
C
M
Y
K
SPORT
4th May 2009
47
[email protected]
The Fresh Prince of Chester-le-Street
Sports Editor DAVID COVERDALE catches up with new Durham captain Will Smith
Only in Will Smith’s wildest dreams
could he have imagined twelve
months ago that the following year
he would be leading out the English
county champions at Lord’s in the
annual season curtain raiser against
the MCC.
Struggling to cement his place in
the Durham first XI, the batsman
signed from Nottinghamshire in
2007 may well have been weighing
up his career options as it looked like
a fight for a contract renewal was on
the cards.
Last season however the Durham
University graduate shone for
his county, scoring 925 runs at an
average of 51.38 to be named the
Northern Rock Player of the Year
and help Durham go on to win the
LV County Championship for the
first time in their history.
In November, Smith was then
named as Dale Benkenstein’s
successor as captain at the Riverside,
topping a remarkable year for the 26year-old.
Here’s what the new man at the
helm had to say on captaincy, the
coming season and his student days.
complacent, where as I don’t think
I’ll ever get complacent.
In high pressured situations last
year I wanted to do well and make
sure I wasn’t leaving it to other
people. Having the captaincy on my
shoulders I think will probably add
to that but I think I’m well equipped
to rise to that challenge. Hopefully
the other guys see me trying to take
on these situations of winning games
for Durham and they’ll follow my
lead.
What do you expect of your team?
One thing I’ve tried to stress is that
after having two successful years,
the onus now is for individuals
to improve themselves and take
that real individual toughness that
you need to not only become good
county cricketers, but international
cricketers.
We’ve got people at this club that
can move on to really high levels
and if they’re taking that personal
responsibility each day and doing the
things each day that’s going to turn
them in to those kind of cricketers
then as a team we’re going to really
develop as well.
It’s always hard when you’ve had
a championship winning season to
sit and think how you’re going to
improve on that but I think it’s just
a calm level headedness and taking
each day as it comes.
Is there an element of self
improvement for yourself as well.
I know England was mentioned at
the back end of last season?
England aspirations are far off for
me at the moment. While it would be
great and I would welcome it with
both hands I think I’ve got other
things to be worrying about at the
moment. Everyone needs to improve
personally and probably myself
more than most really.
In terms of the time I spend on
the team I need to be making sure
I spend that time on myself as well
and making sure that my game is in
order and contributing to the team
from a personal point of view.
Are you worried that the captaincy
will affect your batting?
I’m not worried no. I think every
time that I’ve had captaincy positions
in the past my batting has actually
improved as a result. I see it as a
great thing and it means that I really
can’t rely on other people and I’ll
have to do things myself. Hopefully
other people can take that on board
and see that I’m trying to win games
for Durham.
How enjoyable was your cricket at
Durham University?
It was great fun. Ideally I would
have become a professional cricketer
when I came out of school but I
wasn’t quite at the stage where I
could yet so I took the decision to go
to University and obviously Durham
is a great place.
We had a great coach in Graeme
Fowler. He is a very well respected
coach and I very much enjoyed my
three years there. He had a fairly
large influence on how much I
enjoyed my cricket and what I think
about it. For me it couldn’t have been
a more productive three years.
Obviously you have a bit of fun
while you are there as well and I
think my time there made me a much
more rounded individual.
How much have you been looking
forward to this season as captain?
I’m convinced that it’s going to be
such an enjoyable season in many
respects. Obviously it’s going to be a
very high pressured one but I think
that’s something I’ll be able to take on
board. I really sort of thrive on that
pressure. It’s very very exciting - I’ve
not been as excited about a cricket
season as I am about this one.
Do you think last season was proof
of how you can cope under pressure
as at one point you thought you were
playing for a new contract and then
you had a few pressured situations
where you had to win games and
pull results out of the bag?
What would you say your highlights
of your time at university were?
There’s probably a few, some I
probably shouldn’t really repeat!
Obviously the three first-class games
every year are always a highlight
because you are playing against firstclass opposition. I got a hundred
against a Somerset side in my second
year which was my first first-class
hundred so that will always have a
special place in my mind.
That’s the thing, twelve months ago
I was nowhere to be seen really and
I think that will work in my favour
in a way because I can see the highs
and lows of things. If success comes
too easily then I think people will get
Durham’s new recruit eyes England recall
David Coverdale
Sports Editor
Say ‘Durham and England’ in the
same sentence and Ian Blackwell
would not be the first player that
comes to mind.
While the names of Steve Harmison,
Paul Collingwood, Phil Mustard,
Liam Plunkett and now Graham
Onions could easily trip off the
tongue, Blackwell would probably
not get a mention - something the
all-rounder signed from Somerset in
pre-season is keen to put right.
After making his England oneday debut in 2002, the 30 yearold has since found himself in the
international wilderness. His last
appearance came in India three
years ago, however Blackwell is
confident that his move to the county
champions can reignite his England
career and help him add to his one
Test and 34 one-day appearances so
far.
“I want to progress in my cricket,”
said Blackwell, explaining his move
north. “I was very much in a comfort
zone at Somerset and although I
loved every minute of my nine years
there, it’s a new challenge for me to
come to a club like Durham who are
moving forward at a phenomenal
rate.
“I want to challenge myself a little
more and I want to play for England
again, so hopefully a new challenge
at a new club will put me forward to
where I want to get to.”
The list of one-day players tried
by England since Blackwell’s last
appearance back in April 2006 is
endless with the national side still
seemingly a million miles away from
finding the answers to their perennial
limited overs problems. Blackwell
though takes heart from the recent
inclusion in an England squad of
Worcestershire off-spinner Gareth
Batty, whose international days also
looked numbered not long ago.
“Things go in cycles and you go in
and out of favour,” he said. “Gareth’s
been out of the reckoning for a few
years and he’s got himself back in,
so for people like myself, who have
been out of the loop for two or three
years, it gives you that fresh hope
and a chance of getting back into that
England set-up.”
If England needed reminded of
Blackwell’s immense ability, it was
flaunted for all to see at Lord’s
last month as he smashed the first
hundred of the new county season
against an MCC side boasting
England hopefuls such as Kabir Ali,
Sajid Mahmood and Tim Bresnan in
their attack.
Unfortunately
though,
in
Blackwell’s case, it has not always
been about ability and he has had
to work hard on his fitness in preseason to address an issue that has
dogged him throughout his career.
It is also an issue that has come
under the spotlight this winter with
fellow left-arm spinner/batsman
Samit Patel being dropped by
England for failing fitness targets
and although Blackwell believes
Patel has been made scapegoat by
England he knows it is just a sign of
the times.
“There’s always been a question
mark over my fitness and my weight,
but I’ve always been able to do my
job” he said. “It hasn’t been an issue
being able to bowl 25 overs in a day
or being able to score a hundred.
You can argue that the fielding and
the agility side might be an issue
but again I think that I’m more than
capable in the field.
“I think it’s just that at the higher
level they want athletes as well as
quality cricketers. There’s a bit too
much of a case of people looking
right as opposed to what they can
actually do on the cricket pitch.”
For Blackwell then, having lost
10kg in pre-season through twice
daily runs, it is a relief to return to
cricketing duties and put in the
performances he hopes will attract
Andy Flower and Andrew Strauss’
eye.
And while he admits having
new men at the helm could benefit
his chances, he ultimately knows
selection is out of his hands.
“You see guys come in and they
have their own fresh ideas and who
they rate as cricketers. I’m not too
sure if Straussy rates me as a cricketer
as much as Pieterson or Flintoff or
whoever it may be, but I get on very
well with Straussy, I’ve known him
for a number of years.
“Whether he has any sway or any
influence on who’s going to get
selected I don’t know but all I can do
is score runs for Durham and prove
to people that I have got fitter over
the winter.”
Durham Dynamos v Leicestershire Foxes
STUDENT TICKET OFFER
For Durham’s Twenty20 match with Leicestershire on 29th
May, tickets are available to students for the bargain price of
just £10. The price of the ticket includes entry to the ground,
a free pint and free entry and Q-Jump for Sea nightclub.
The club are also on the lookout for students willing to sell tickets
for the match. Sellers will receive £1 for every ticket sold.
If you are interested in buying or selling tickets, please
email [email protected].
48
4th May 2009
SPORT
Hendo and Leazes
set for final battle
INTRA MURAL FOOTBALL
CUP FINAL PREVIEW
Chris Cotter
HENDERSON HALL A
ROAD TO COCHRANE PARK
Round One: 3-1 v Unreal Madrid
Round Two: 4-1 v Face In Goal
Quarter-Finals: 3-1 v Politic Thistle
Semi-Finals: 4-3 v Lokomotiv FC
The prestigious Intra Mural Cup will
come to a climax this Wednesday,
when Castle Leazes take on their
Division One rivals Henderson Hall
A. Confident Henderson manager
Ryan Hand will be looking to forget
about troubles off the pitch and
give their loyal fans something to
celebrate.
“I have absolutely full confidence
in my players. These fans have
waited a long time for silverware
and with constant boardroom power
struggles, it has not been a pleasant
time to be a Hendonian.
“Believe me, next Wednesday is
not just going to be a day out for
them, it will be an occasion to tell the
grandkids about.”
Leazes will be hoping to go one
better than last year’s agonising 2-0
defeat in the final at the hands of
Dyslexic UntIed, and will certainly
feel they have what it takes after
knocking out early favourites BarcaLaw-Na.
The Leazes team has certainly been
built on a solid foundation, with
centre-back Jon Mulcahy, centre
midfielder Cathal McElhinney, and
centre forward Anthony Elders
representing the spine of the team.
However, players like Craven and
Spink on the Henderson side, both
born just a stones throw away from
their home ground Cochrane Park,
epitomize the never-say-die attitude
that has been instilled into the team
this year.
One of the key factors in the result
will undoubtedly be the form of the
two top-scorers in opposing colours.
Dave ‘Virgin’ Macmillan for Leazes,
and Ola ‘The Prince’ Kupolati for
Hendo both have 12 goals a-piece
this term and looking to add to their
tallies.
The two sides appear well-matched
after two dour goalless meetings in
the league at Close House. However,
the move to a bigger pitch with a
better surface should ensure that
the game is a thrilling end-to-end
encounter, and both teams will be
looking to make sure their wide see
as much of the ball as possible.
Manager Ed Elliot, also known as
Mr Castle Leazes, surmised: “This
tie is going to end in disappointment
for one party and in a party for the
other.”
He continued: “It seems Jesmond
is currently gripped with cup fever
and I’ve had no end of well wishers
approach me in the street. Hopefully
we can carry their sentiments into
the final and finally deliver a trophy
after seventeen years of hurt.”
Influential captain Charlie Morgan
echoed his manager’s sentiments
in the build up to the game with a
poignant observation: “We take no
pride in coming second and will
therefore be going all out for a win
because if you’re not first, you’re
last.”
Both Morgan’s and Elliot’s
optimistic words are sure to shoot
a dose of inspiration through the
Leazes team, though Hendo manager
Ryan Hand also had encouraging
words for his team, whilst reflecting
on a tough start to the season.
“This is a dream came true for me,”
Hand insists.
“When I took over in the summer
there were some negative comments
and chants, most hurtful was ‘Scouse
Mafia out’, but I believe we are on
the brink of something special.”
Club-favourite
Mike
Conelly
exemplified the intentions of the
Hendo team.
“On Wednesday you will see us
giving the gaffer everything we have
got,” Conelly said.
“I don’t care if I have to crawl off
the pitch, as long as we get ‘Old Big
Ears’ in our trophy cabinet.”
With both teams so desperate to
get their hands on this famous cup,
the match is sure to be a tightlycontested but enthralling affair.
[email protected]
CASTLE LEAZES
ROAD TO COCHRANE PARK
Round One: 11-1 v Hangover 96
Round Two: 1-0 v Barca-Law-Na
Quarter-Finals: 4-0 v Fluffy Wilson
Semi-Finals: 2-1 v Dyslexic Untied
Barca and Garnett in fight for title honours
INTRA MURAL FOOTBALL
WEDNESDAY ROUND-UP
Ed Elliot
With the summer term now well
underway and exams on the horizon,
the Wednesday Intra Mural football
league finds itself only two weeks
away from completion, with teams
continuing to battle for honours and
survival at the end of a long season.
The two horse race for the Division
One title has entered the final
furlong, with Garnett A and BarcaLaw-Na currently tied at the top
on 22 points; Barca having played a
game more. The two sides are set to
go head-to-head at the end of next
week in a mouth-watering clash that
could well determine the eventual
champions.
In a re-run of last week’s Cup semifinal, Lokomotiv secured a mid-table
finish whilst piling more pressure
on Henderson Hall A with a 4-2
win at Cochrane Park. The result
leaves Henderson A level on points
with relegation rivals Castle Leazes
albeit with a slightly superior goal
difference.
With both sides set to face title
chasing Garnett A in their respective
final games of the season, the two
games will go a long way to deciding
the fates of the teams at both the top
and bottom of the table.
Meanwhile,
basement
side
Henderson
Hall’s
impending
relegation from the top flight was
confirmed this week with a 3-1 defeat
to third placed Dyslexic Untied.
The Second Division title race is
also yet to be decided.
Having already sealed promotion,
both The Hurricanes and Real
Politique have a chance of clinching
the title with one game to go.
Politique face mid-table opposition
in the shape of Kieran Hill’s Real
Mechanical, whilst The Hurricanes
face a resurgent Crayola side who
still find themselves teetering on the
edge of relegation.
Currently in the relegation places
are already demoted Pro Evo
Pathers and Face In Goal, with the
final relegation spot looking set to
be decided next week when Face In
Goal take on Crayola – currently one
point and one place ahead of them.
In contrast to the top two divisions,
Divisions Three and Four are
altogether more final.
In the Third Division, Ecosoccer
have taken the title with Borussia
Forsythe joining them in Division
Two as runners-up. At the other end,
Aftermath have suffered relegation
heartache, and, despite a 3-0 victory
over Aftermath that manager Martin
McGready termed ‘glorious’, Civille
F.C. will be joining their rivals in the
bottom tier of Intra Mural football
next season.
The Fourth Division has seen
undefeated Inter City storm to
the title with an impressive nine
wins from eleven games under the
stewardship of current Blackburn
Rovers star David Dunn.
Second placed Ladzio plc, needing
one point from their final match,
seem assured to take the other
promotion place, with Snakes On A
Plane looking unlikely to gatecrash
the party.
Newcomers Politic Thistle, without
a win all season, find themselves
propping up the division whilst
Hangover 96 seem destined to finish
second bottom, just behind Tub Boys
FC and Olympic Mayonnaise.
Inter City top Division 4 and raise cancer awareness
INTRA MURAL FOOTBALL
DIVISION FOUR
David Dunn
A beautiful day greeted Inter City as
they ran out deserved 3-0 winners
over a battling Hangover 96 side,
and with it came the Intra Mural
Division 4 title.
Inter City are sponsored by the
Firefly Cancer Awareness and
Support Foundation, a charity that
promotes cancer awareness in young
people, whose motto is ‘Check Your
Tackle!’, which the team have printed
on their shirts.
This, of course, refers to young
men who refuse to check themselves
for testicular cancer, 50 per cent of
which is diagnosed in men under
the age of 35. “Early detection is
essential to the high survival rates”
says Captain Dunn, “so why not
combine checking yourself with a
scratch?” Further information, as
well as future Firefly events, can be
found at www.fireflyclub.co.uk.
The match itself was an attractive
affair, with the 3G Longbenton pitch
playing its part. Inter City lined
up in a 4-3-3 formation, and the 3
talented central midfield players Morton, Hayden and O’Toole - did
not disappoint with some lovely
interplay which was supported
by the raiding full backs of Ellis,
Anderson, and, in the second half,
Goodall.
After a scrappy opening to the
game Inter City began to gain most
of the possession, looking worthy
league leaders and composed on
the ball. Any attacks that Hangover
built were more often than not
aerial raids, which were dealt with
comfortably by City’s two centre
backs – the commanding Dunn and
strong MacWilliam – who have been
part of a solid back line all season.
Any shots that found the target
were dealt with comfortably by
Pinks in goal, who has established
himself as an excellent shot-stopper
throughout the season.
City opened the scoring through
deadly finisher Nick Stott, after
some neat interplay between the
forward three – also made up of
the skilful Sharma and energetic
Gardiner. Hangover did come close
to equalising soon after, but for a
great goal line clearance by Adam
Morton.
The first half slowly came to an end,
with the only real highlight being
some extreme acrobatics in his own
half from fullback Charlie Ellis, who
clearly had London 2012 at the back
of his head. The strength in depth
showed when the forward three were
replaced by the flamboyant Gibson,
silky Chinnock and talismanic striker
Simon Thomas in the second half.
The changes reaped dividends as
O’Toole made it 2-0 after creating
a chance out of nothing, followed
by Simon Thomas tapping in after
a mix-up in defence, making it 3-0
and handing the championship to
Inter City in their first season, who
will ply their trade in Division 3 next
season.
When asked what has made the
season such a success, team captain
Dunn said: “it’s simply down to
teamwork, working for each other
on the pitch. The spirit throughout
the season has been incredible.
“We would also like to thank Firefly
as well for providing our kits and all
their support, but it’s been a pleasure
to promote awareness about such an
important issue such as cancer in
young people”.
Bucks Fizz celebrations carried
on through the night, as the Firefly
message shines bright, with all
that’s left to say being “Check Your
Tackle!”.
C
M
Y
K
SPORT
4th May 2009
Martial arts
success at Leeds
THAI & KICKBOXING CLUB
David McDonald
On Saturday 14th March, the
University’s thai and kickboxing
clubs joined forces to take 20 fighters
down to the Northern Universities
Kickboxing Championships held by
Leeds University.
With a lot of new fighters joining
the club this was the first time any
of the competitors had fought in a
tournament, and within minutes of
arriving a number of fighters were
thrown straight into combat against
fighters from some of the strongest
kickboxing universities in the country,
including Leeds and Loughborough.
There were strong performances
from all competitors - especially as
a number of fighters were fighting
above their normal weight categories
- with Danielle Wood, Juan Cervantes,
Stefan Bonney and Lawrence Hares
putting in particularly strong displays
that impressed judges and spectators
alike, and were unfortunate not to
progress to their respective finals.
There were however a number of
successes for the club on the day,
with Shruti Parikh and Sarah Laker
both finishing runners up in their
categories and three fighters ending
up champions. Rachel Cresswell
battled hard to win the women’s
advanced heavyweight division and
Caroline Tait was also involved in a
tough women’s middleweight final
and emerged victorious.
The final champion of the day
was Robert Taylor in the men’s
middleweight, doing so with one
of the most controlled and classiest
displays of kickboxing throughout
the entire tournament.
The two clubs then saw further
success the following week in
Edinburgh, where they dominated
the competition, winning half of
the medals on offer. Once again we
had two more fighters making their
tournament debuts in Anna Gamburg
and Nick Ellul and both these fighters
came home with runners up medals
in their two divisions.
JP Matthews was fighting in one
of the largest divisions of the day
and also finished with a runners up
medal, and Cédric Dit Wallabregue
dominated the men’s Heavyweight
division emerging a clear winner in
the final.
Perhaps the highlight of the day
for the club however was the men’s
lightweight, where both finalists
coming from Newcastle’s Thai boxing
club, with David McDonald just
taking the win in a judge’s decision
from Richard Brückner in the closest
fight of the day.
After two triumphant displays from
two clubs new fight squads, and with
many of the competitors carrying on
next year the future is looking very
bright for the University. For further
information on the club please search
for ‘Newcastle Thai and Kickboxing’ on
Facebook.
49
[email protected]
North East rowers cross oars
Newcastle in search of first Boat Race win over Durham
BOAT RACE PREVIEW
Steve Impey
The
annual
Northumbrian
Universities Boat Race is back
this Saturday as Newcastle and
Durham take to the waters in their
13th meeting on the Tyne. A clean
sweep from Durham last year saw
Newcastle come second best yet
again, but this time we may be
looking at a closer contest between
the two universities.
A year on, Newcastle have pulled
back against their rivals, with both
coming ahead of each other once in
the men’s senior and novice boats,
and the novice women, so close last
year, still undefeated to Durham
throughout.
The senior women will not be in the
best shape however, with only five
in total taking to the murky waters
Saturday, which will obviously limit
any chances in taking the Chambers
trophy.
Newcastle men’s senior boat has
been put on a diet too ahead of the
race for the Clasper trophy, as two
men are replaced by lighter models,
both under the 72.5 kilo mark.
The four squads of both senior
and fresher men and women have
been put through their paces in the
preparations ahead of their respected
races.
Enduring long painstaking hours
on the rowers, multiple cycling tests,
weights sessions, and practices out
on the water, the effort put in will
prove both the importance of this
weekend’s event, and too the sort of
heights the boat club aim to achieve.
A training camp in Italy under the
guidance of former Italian coach
Angelo Savarine is put in use to iron
out any creases in Newcastle’s rowers’
techniques, and while the conditions
back in Newcastle may not be as
kind as those out on the continent,
training in the Mediterranean heat
will only count beneficial in proving
the squad’s endurance levels.
Recent success in the Nottingham
City regatta saw two silver medal
wins for our novice women and four
golds for our senior men. Newcastle
also took to the Thames waters in
London’s Head of River Race the
previous week, three Newcastle
eights racing out of 409 crews from
across the UK. Newcastle’s first to
cross the line made an incredible
37th place in a time of 18’35’’12.
Tideway Sculler’s super-eight
won the race 70 seconds ahead
of Newcastle, however, medal
winners from the Beijing and Athens
Olympics made the winning boat
one that included some of the finest
scullers across the world.
Placed 88th overall, Newcastle
will hopefully take forward this
experience into a hard fought battle
this Saturday evening.
Will this be the year then that Team
Newcastle will gain their first victory
over Durham? We will have to watch
in anticipation, crossing our fingers
as both clubs cross oars.
The recent win in the Rutherford
Head for our novice women could
shine a good omen on the Newcastle
team, who will aim to beat Durham
with similar effect. The club will need
to win at least three of the four races
however if they are to be victorious.
A draw will see Durham retain
their trophy, continuing a tradition
Newcastle are in search of breaking.
Newcastle will be looking at their Henley Regatta success last summer as inspiration
Rowcroft is Newcastle’s Sheffield Star
JUDO CLUB
Matthew Herdman
Newcastle Judo’s Andy Rowcroft
scored a silver medal at this year’s
BUCS Individual Championships,
with the club’s first team coming a
close fourth in the team event.
The event was held in Sheffield and
is a team event designed mainly as a
way of bringing universities together
with a competitive edge.
Though for the German team of
Muenster it was rather more serious
than for the British Judo teams, as
their “Muenster Monsters” chant
was being sung at every opportunity
- as well as an appearance from their
team mascot.
Newcastle however would not be
intimidated by such gimmicks we
were confident having brought two
solid teams to the event.
Newcastle’s second team started
the competition losing the first
match mostly to poor refereeing.
A confidence boost by our club
president, Rob Stuart, focused the
second team leading to a triumph
over UCL with three of the victories
coming in under a minute.
This win put them through to the
second stage of the competitionwhere their hopes ended soon after,
losing to Warwick. A team made up
mainly of beginners had achieved
more than expected and could now
get behind the first team.
The first team flew through the
first two stages of the competition,
leading them to the quarter finals
where they exacted revenge with
a flourish against Warwick, who
had just previously knocked out
Newcastle’s second team.
With this they came face to face
with the infamous Muenster first
team, a team that looks like it trains
eight days a week, and rather suspect
in a university competition, included
two men at least over forty.
Putting up a valiant stand against
the team that had taken the cup the
two previous years the Newcastle
firsts were knocked out.
Bronze was still in reach through
and would be settled in a match
against Manchester. The match
hung in balance after two unlucky
losses for our female players, Lisa
Redford and Bethan Kemp. Mike
Sherlock had to face down a war cry
screamed by his adversary and this
left Manchester 3-0 up.
However Rauf Ashrafov’s superb
display brought Newcastle its first
win and new hope.
Next on was Jim Parris who
engaged in a full out battle that had
us terrorised with nerves ending
unluckily for Newcastle and left us
playing for pride.
Final to step up was Ross Jackson
against a monstrous opponent
flaunting a gold adidas uniform,
which can only be worn by national
champions. The national champion
proved his status defeating Ross and
putting Newcastle into fourth place
in the competition.
Muenster took gold and silver
medals in the competition, in a rather
anti-climatic final - and took the cup
home with them. Newcastle had
come second in the competition out
of the British teams and had proven
itself a competitor in University
Judo.
The
Individual
BUCS
Championships was also held in
Sheffield a few weeks later, but due
to injuries and timing problems
only three Newcastle players
made it down to the event; Bethan
Kemp in the under 63Kg category,
and Andrew Rowcroft and Luke
Blackburn in the under 81Kg.
This
was
Blackburn’s
first
competition and he was unluckily
caught with a straight win in the
final seconds of his first fight, and
loosing on points in his second fight
knocked him out.
Bethan Kemp fared little better
leaving only Andrew Rowcroft with
a chance for a medal.
Rowcroft started with a bang
defeating his opponent in 35
seconds. Beating his second with a
solid piece of Judo sent him into the
quarter finals. Here he excelled again
taking an outright win and bringing
a chance of a medal into reach.
Not stopping and going for
gold, he achieved another victory
delivering him in to the final. With
a medal assured, the last bout was
a furious melee ending up on the
ground where Andy was pinned and
eventually defeated.
Though not taking the gold, a
Newcastle member taking a silver
medal at BUCS was great news for
the club.
It can be said to have been a good
year for Newcastle Judo Team
and has given us hope that greater
success will come next year.
Northern Angels scoop first and third at University Nationals
David Coverdale
Sports Editor
Cheerleading continues to go from
strength to strength at Newcastle
University as the Newcastle Northern
Angels were left celebrating yet more
success at the British Cheerleading
Association University Nationals in
Telford last month.
Following a strong performance
at the Future Cheer University
competition at Loughborough in
February, the girls completed the
finest season in their club’s history
with a superb first place finish in
the small stunt group category and a
third place in the squad stunt routine
category.
Under the guidance of coaches
Kay Mann and Natalie Edwards, the
Northern Angels ran an intensive
training camp in the week running up
to the Telford event to choreograph
and learn the routines for the three
divisions.
The hard work certainly paid off
with Newcastle once again showing
that of the 124 teams and 47 different
clubs on show, they are now up there
with the very best in the country,
As always, competition was fierce
and the Northern Angels were up
against squads who have had and
perfected their routines from as early
as September. The girls were even
left to overcome one of their squad
members becoming suddenly ill on
the day of the competition and their
meticulous preparations were thrown
into disarray as she was forced to
withdraw from competition.
Nevertheless the Northern Angels
were able to regroup and secure a
bronze medal in the squad stunt
routine, narrowly behind Kingston
Knights and the winning Coventry
Angels squad.
Newcastle were then to go two
places better in the small stunt group
as Nat Edwards, Becky Morrell,
Abby McGrath, Libby Stanton and
Charlotte Eva teamed up to take gold
ahead of Plymouth Lightning Storm
and Lancaster Roses.
The BCA University Nationals
topped off what has been a truly
remarkable year for cheerleading at
Newcastle and there are high hopes
for the squad as they look to build on
this success and continue to grow in
the future.
With
cheerleading
finally
becoming an official BUCS sport
from September it all bodes well for
Team Newcastle as the Newcastle
Northern Angels look forward to
securing some precious BUCS points
next term which will no doubt go a
long way to helping the University
maintain its top ten BUCS ranking.
SPORT
50
4th May 2009
[email protected]
TEAM NEWCASTLE’S 08/09
J. GAVIN
Greene and Kennedy reflect
on another victorious year
Jamie Gavin
Sports Editor
With so much success in the 2007/08
season, Team Newcastle have had a
tall task to live up to this term.
Tenth in BUCS and a resounding
Stan Calvert win last time out meant
AU Officer Jimmy Greene and
Performance Sport Director Fraser
Kennedy faced the test of keeping
Team Newcastle amongst some of
the best funded and most renowned
sporting institutions in the country.
But live up to it they did, and
with the BUCS points coming in
at a resoundingly fast rate after a
relatively slow start, and another
memorable Stan Calvert victory
in the bag, sport at Newcastle
University appears to be on the up
and up. Courier Sport took time to
talk to the key players in this success
story.
Almost twelve months after
taking over his post, Greene looks
comfortable at his desk in the AU
office with the Stan Calvert trophy
perched close by and he begins
by confidently stating that “Team
Newcastle is going from strength to
strength.”
In what has been another highly
successful season, Team Newcastle
looks set to at least match last
season’s BUCS points tally, and as a
beaming Greene speaks to Courier
Sport for the final time in his role, he
reflects happily on what has been a
rewarding year for the for the former
hockey 3rd team captain.
“I’ve thoroughly enjoyed my year
in charge - it’s been great fun,”
explained Greene. “Across the
board, Team Newcastle have been
fantastic.
“We’ve had a great Stan Calvert
win and all but one of our teams that
were promoted last year have stayed
in the Premiership, which is a great
achievement.”
Greene singled the skiing and
boat club out for special praise and
spoke of Stan Calvert as his ultimate
highlight as he looked back on that
magnificent day in February.
“I genuinely didn’t expect us to
take Stan Calvert and that was a
fantastic victory, it was definitely my
highlight of the year. The hockey and
the netball on the day were fantastic
and they will probably go down as
my two highlights of the year.”
Kennedy also has reason to be
pleased. As Performance Sport
Director he has overseen a period
of continual improvement for
Team Newcastle and he reflected
on another year of hard work and
success.
“Again I am proud with how Team
Newcastle has done this year,” the
Scotsman said. “We are continually
punching above our weight which
shows you how much teams and
individuals are dedicated to the
cause
“Although I don’t like to single out
any specific achievement over others
I am very pleased with those teams
that came up to the Premiership this
season and maintained their status,
namely netball, men’s badminton
1sts and men’s table tennis 1sts.”
So what now for Team Newcastle?
Are we at our very limits in terms
of getting the most out of what we
have, or can we hope to make even
further progress in years to come?
“Without
anymore
financial
investment it will be hard for
Newcastle to go any further”
explained Kennedy.
“To currently be top ten is
wonderful, but as to how sustainable
this can be is debatable, with the
majority of other universities
significantly investing more and
more in to sport.
“Sport is such a wonderful
recruitment and marketing tool for
universities - it therefore cannot be
ignored. Providing we are clever in
what we invest in, and continue to be
organised, committed and dedicated
to the cause then we can maintain
top 12, I am confident of that.
“However, with additional funding
and one or two more resources - then
who knows where we can finish.”
Greene also seemed optimistic
about the future, and he too stressed
the correlation between funding and
attainment.
“If the funding comes there’s
absolutely no limit to where sport at
Newcastle can go. We’re currently
competing against universities that
are throwing a lot more money at
sport and staying a lot higher than
them.
“I’d love to see the University take
sport more seriously. I know money
AU Officer Jimmy Greene and his successor Vicky Tyas holding the Stan Calvert Cup - the trophy Tyas is desperate to keep hold of in 2010
is tight at the moment but I genuinely
think Sport at Newcastle can flourish
if it’s given the chance to. We’ve got
the talent in, it’s just whether we can
look after it and keep it.”
AU Officer elect Vicky Tyas is
waiting in the wings to replace
Greene in June, and after winning
the election in March, she looks to
raise the bar even higher for Team
Newcastle.
Greene spoke highly of his
successor saying, “I think Vicky will
do a great job, she’s been outstanding
this year with the netball 3rds, and
she’ll definitely make a fantastic AU
officer.
“I took over from a tall blonde
netball player and Im passing it back
to a tall blonde netball player,” joked
Greene, referring to his predecessor
Lydia Oxenham.
So as Greene moves on, Kennedy
and Tyas will now face the familiar
pressure of living up to this seasons’
success when BUCS gets underway
again in September. And in what
will no doubt be another eventful
season, it would take a brave person
to bet against them living up to the
challenge.
Tyas: We can maintain top 10 BUCS place
David Coverdale
& Jamie Gavin
Sports Editors
Just over a month after speaking
to an ecstatic Vicky Tyas about her
magnificent election win, Courier
Sport caught up with the AU Officer
elect once again as she made her
final preparations before beginning
her new role in June.
What are your main aims for the
coming season?
Obviously I want to make Team
Newcastle as successful as possible.
A top ten finish next year is what I
would want to aim for, as well as
retaining the Stan Calvert Cup. As an
institution we can definitely achieve
that with the help from the Sports
Centre and the AU.
be part of Team Newcastle.
How much are you looking forward
to Stan Calvert?
Hopefully I’m still going to play
netball next year. The home matches
shouldn’t be a problem, but I’ll
probably have to miss some away
matches. I definitely want to be part
of the netball club next year, so I can
do my own bit towards getting us
some BUCS points.
I can’t wait! It’s one of the best days
for the AU and the University as a
whole, and it’s a day that everyone
can get involved in - whether you
play sport or not. I plan to push the
profile of Stan Calvert and make sure
everyone on campus is aware of it
and knows about our achievements.
Working with Courier Sport I
also want to raise the profile of
sport across campus. There’s sport
happening every week and you don’t
have to be part of a playing team to
What about the netball club, will
you still be involved with them
next year?
What do you think of the AU’s
achievements this year?
Jimmy’s done a really good job this
year and I’ve got a lot of respect for
him. Hopefully I’ll have the support
of both Jimmy and Lydia [Oxenham]
over the summer and next year, so I
should be able to make next season
even more successful. I’m well
aware that its going to be a difficult
year but I’m hoping that we can do
even better.
What about the all important
Wednesday nights?
We need a venue that’s going to
provide funding for the AU as well
as a good night for everyone, so
we’re open to offers from the existing
venues and from other venues.
It’s important we get somewhere
that’s going to offer the best cash
funds and somewhere that’s going to
offer a great night for everyone. I’m
going to be looking for a deal that’s
not just for committee members but
for all club members.
How far can sport at Newcastle
University go?
I think with the support of the
University and the Union and the
University working together, there’s
no reason why we can’t not only
remain in the top ten, but push on a
few places.
It’s going to be very difficult to
challenge the likes of Loughborough
and Bath and places that have lots
and lots of funding, but although we
may not have the funding that these
universities enjoy, with the quality
of sports people at this university
there’s no reason why we can’t at
least finish in the top ten.
C
M
Y
K
SPORT
4th May 2009
2008/09 SEASON
ROLL OF HONOUR
Ski and Snowboarding Club
BUCS Champions,
Alpine Championships and
BUCS Dryslope
Championships (BUDS)
Boat Club
Win at Henley Royal Regatta
51
[email protected]
Delight for NUSSC at AU Awards
Kennedy: Newcastle best UK University for snowsports
Jamie Gavin
at the AU Ball
Men’s football
1sts win BUCS 2B
2nds win 3B
The ski and snowboarding club
scooped the all important ‘Club of
the Year’ award at Sunday night’s
Women’s basketball
AU Ball.
1sts win BUCS 2B
After an outstanding season the
club were recently crowned BUCS
Men’s hockey 4ths
Champions after they fended off
Win BUCS promotion
strong completion to take both
the Alpine and the Dry Slope
Netball Club
Championships
for
2008/09.
3rds win BUCS promotion
Performance Sport Director Fraser
4ths win BUCS promotion
Kennedy reserved special praise for
the club’s achievements this season.
Men’s rugby
“Their achievement is fabulous, to
4ths reach BUCS Finals
be the best University for snowsports
in the UK cannot be underestimated
Men’s squash
and by doing this, they can only help
1sts win BUCS promotion
Undefeated all year in BUCS league. in our recruitment for elite skiers,”
Kennedy said.
Conference Cup finalists
The cricket club were also awarded
‘Team of the Year’ after their indoor
Women’s squash
side finished an excruciatingly
2nds win BUCS Cup.
close second in the BUCS Indoor
Championships at Lord’s.
Men’s table tennis 2nds
“To get all the way to the final
BUCS Cup finalists
Men’s cricket
National Indoor runnersup at Lord’s
Men’s golf
Set to compete in BUCS
Trophy Finals this week
Sailing Club
Qualified for the Wilson Trophy
Men’s Badminton
1sts finish 3rd in BUCS Premier
American football
National finalists
Jujitsu club
2nd in BUCS Jujitsu
Championships
AU AWARDS 2009
Outstanding Contribution
to Sport at Newcastle
Rachel Adcock
Coach of the Year
Keith Hugheston – (Cricket);
Ben Johnson (American Football);
Linda Stevenson (Karate);
Tamara Taylor (Women’s Rugby);
Mick Christopher (Men’s Hockey);
Angelo Savarino (Boat);
Craig Stamp (Women’s
Basketball); Daniel Hall
(Women’s Football).
Winner: Gill Mason (Netball)
Administrator of the Year
Oliver Briggs (Golf);
Joe Chamberlin (American
Football); Bi Kua (Women’s
Volleyball); Jennifer Robertson
(Cheerleading); Kathryn
Hurrell (Netball); Adam
Pearson (Men’s Football);
Winner: Sarah McChesney
(Women’s Squash)
Club of the Year
Netball, Boat, Cricket, Sailing,
Winner: Ski & Snowboard
Most Improved Club
Sailing, American Football,
Womens Basketball, Cheerleading
Winner: Men’s Squash
Team of the Year
Golf, Netball 1st, Rugby
2nd, Rugby 4th, Badminton,
Winner: Men’s Cricket
at Lord’s after beating several
established cricket universities was
an incredible achievement and they
so easily could have won it,” said
Kennedy
Elsewhere the men’s squash club
were awarded ‘Most Improved
Club for 2008/09’. Their first team
remained unbeaten in their BUCS
league, edging their own 2s into
second position. They also reached
the Conference Cup final, only just
losing out to a very strong Manchester
team.
Netball coach Gill Mason won the
inaugural ‘Coach of the Year’ award
and Sarah McChesney took the
‘Administer of the Year’ award.
Skier
Racheal
Adcock
was
recognised for her unprecedented
BUCS points tally, and she was
rewarded with the ‘Outstanding
Contribution to Sport at Newcastle’
award.
Courier Sport’s very own Kirsten
Pettit took home the prestigious
‘Sports Writer of the Year’ award
for her outstanding coverage of the
netball club this season. Her regular
Netball round-up column has been
enjoyed by members of the netball
club and Courier Sport readers a-like.
Congratulations Kirsten.
Courier Sport would like to thank
all our writers for their invaluable
contributions to the section during
the 2008/09 season. You make
the section what it is and we wish
those who are leaving the very
best of luck, and look forward to
welcoming back our current and
any new writers next year.
Anyone can write for Courier
Sport, so if you are interested in
contributing next year please e-mail
[email protected]
Mixed season for men’s hockey club
MEN’S HOCKEY
Charley Wright
An interesting season for the Men’s
Hockey club has left them clinging
on to Performance Sport status, with
only the success of the 4th team
securing the club top tier funding for
another year.
Coming into the 08/09 season
the 1st XI were looking strong after
losing only two players. With the
core of the team staying with the
side, the season looked bright for the
club’s top team.
Unfortunately this vision of success
disappeared swiftly as the lack of
freshness in the team seemed to
bring about complacency and a sense
of going through the motions. This
impression was confirmed with one
point from 4 BUCS games going into
mid-November, including an underpar performance and subsequent
result against main rivals Sheffield
University, losing 4-1 away.
After the Christmas break results
picked up for the Newcastle side
who took away 7 points from three
games in the spring term. This
included a thrilling 4-3 victory over
leaders Sheffield Hallam with 11
men, sealing the Royals as the only
side in the league to take points off
the eventual league winners.
Despite finishing in the 2nd
relegation spot, Newcastle were in
the BUCS Cup, and celebrated with a
6-0 victory over Aberdeen, followed
by a 7-0 drumming at the hands of
Loughborough 2s. However, this
disappointment was short lived
when it was revealed that Sheffield
Hallam had gained promotion to the
national league, keeping Newcastle
up by default.
The 2nd XI season was as
unpredictable, with an influx of
several freshers and a new captain at
the helm, the club expected the long
awaited achievement of promotion
out of a league shared with the 3rd
XI.
By the end of November the 2s had
amassed an unspectacular record
of two wins, two draws and a loss
in BUCS Northern Conference 3B.
This record was balanced somewhat
by an impressive run in the newly
formed BUCS Cup, the 2s securing
two dazzling victories.
In contrast to the post-Christmas
fortunes of the 1st XI, the 2nd team
struggled to find form after the
winter break, winning only one game
in the run in to the end of the season.
The Royals were also knocked out
abruptly in the 3rd round of the cup
by Sheffield University men’s 2nd
team.
With a 3rd place finish, the season
was largely disappointing for a
team that seems to constantly
underachieve, leaving an important
job for the new captain for the 09/10
season, Patrick Brown.
Turning towards the lower club,
another mixed bag of a season was
experienced by the 3rd XI. After
losing a few senior players over the
summer it was up to a team with
a good balance of experience and
fresher enthusiasm to produce.
The season started badly for the
3rd side in the club, winning one
game of five, taking only one point
from the first half of the season.
This disappointment was mirrored
by a dramatic penalty flick exit
in the BUCS Cup to the eventual
conquerors of the 2nd XI, Sheffield
University 2s.
The season improved marginally
after the Christmas rest period,
with the 3s boasting a 50% winning
record from four games. The biggest
success for the team came in the form
of a sparkling 2-1 win over the 2nd
XI, emphasising a point which has
been debated in length, notably the
underachievement of the 2nd team.
The real success story with a twist
in BUCS for the hockey club was
the triumphant championing of the
BUCS Northern Conference 4B by the
Newcastle University Men’s Hockey
4th XI.
The team, captained to glory by
Nick Hanington, dropped only 7
points from 10 games, leaving them
with a staggering 22 points in a very
competitive league. Frustratingly, the
form couldn’t be taken any further
than the 1st round of the cup, where
the Royals were drawn against
Durham University 3s.
However, the jubilation of winning
the league was dampened rather by
the frustrating stagnation of the 2nd
and 3rd XI’s in the league above,
with the rules stating that the leagues
cannot contain more than two teams
from one university. Even so, the 4th
XI can rest assured that they once
again were the best performing team
in the club.
Knights crowned BUCS 2B champions
WOMEN’S BASKETBALL
Alice Holloway
The Women’s Basketball 1st have
enjoyed an outstanding season,
comfortably winning BUCS league
2B.
It began optimistically with a great
turnout at trials, but no one could
predict how the team would develop
and play together. However, the
Knights immediately blossomed
into a tight-knit group on and off the
court, leaving oppositions rattled by
repeated fast breaks and impressive
passing out of press defence.
The hard work paid off, as the girls
were crowned league winners, after
beating the likes of Bradford and
ultimate rivals Sunderland.
This is something that would never
have been achieved without the high
levels of commitment from everyone
involved. Seven o’clock sessions
on Tuesday mornings left the team
bleary-eyed, exhausted but always
high in spirits – plus not forgetting
the all-important Wednesday trips to
Blu Bambu.
We have seen vast improvements
from those new to the game, those
new to Newcastle and of course
existing players who continued to
give one hundred percent. Special
mention goes to Coach Stampy who
has always believed, but was never
afraid to give us a well-needed kick
up the back side when heads started
to drop!
There have been some close calls,
running into overtime at Bradford
and York, but the team never failed
to pick up the pace when it counted,
dealing with some questionable
refereeing along the way.
Throughout the year we have seen
some great offensive team work,
doubled up with rock solid defensive
skills. Although not the tallest team
in the league, the communication
between players and their ability
to stay positive, even through that
inevitably tough third quarter,
have made for some memorable
performances.
In the Easter break, all teams
endured a gruelling 30-hour coach
journey to Lloret de Mar in Spain
where we played hard and partied
even harder. The girls came away
winners once more - despite the
horrific hangovers - and it’s fair to
say an unforgettable week was had
by all.
Awards Evening brought the year
to an epic close when all five Knights
teams came together and celebrated
in style. Joint MVP went to Claire
Vaughan and Estefania Dura Breiler,
Coach’s Player to Jessica Ambler
and Player’s Player was awarded to
Jennifer Bennett.
Although saying goodbye to our
much loved captain Laura Pope this
year, we move into next season with
a team that’s stronger than ever, and
the confidence that we can maintain
the title we deserve so much.
[email protected]
4th May 2009
Exclusive interview with
former England rugby
union captain Will Carling
Page 46
Ladies on top at Cochrane
Cheeky Ladies battle past Medics to take Intra Mural Rugby Cup
INTRA MURAL
RUGBY CUP FINAL
CHEEKY LADIES
MEDICS
22
13
Dan Cottam
Cheeky
Ladies
put
the
disappointment of last year’s defeat
in the Intra Mural Cup final to rest by
winning this year’s competition in a
typically gutsy performance.
In a game that promised to be close
fought, the Ladies defeated Medics
22-13 to clinch the trophy in a thrilling
encounter at Cochrane Park.
The playing conditions were near
perfect, with the pitch in superb
condition and with a large amount of
support for both teams. The Medics
began the game looking the strongest
team with some early pressure on the
Cheeky Ladies back line.
The Ladies held firm though and
looked to play the ball quickly when
they had possession. They continued
to look to the backs for their source
of attack and exploit the pace of their
wingers.
Both teams seemed evenly matched
with neither able to create a real
opening of any kind. That was until
midway through the first half with
the first try of the game.
After play was delayed for several
minutes due an injury, the Medics
defence was caught off guard. Quick
passing across the Cheeky Ladies’
backs saw an overlap on the right
hand side and they were able to
power over the line.
Despite taking the lead, the Ladies
lacked discipline in defence and
were giving away needless penalties
allowing Medics to root themselves
firmly in their opposing half of the
pitch.
The Medics were looking to the
power of their forward pack but
did not look like breaking down a
stubborn Ladies defence.
That was until a swift break on the
left wing saw a gap open up and
the Medics winger went over in the
corner to level the scores.
Medics were back in the game
but the euphoria did not last long.
A. WILSON
Minutes later the Cheeky Ladies
regained the lead to see them head
into the interval 10-5 to the good.
Some poor tackling allowed the
Ladies try scorer in for the softest try
of the game and give the half time
team talks a completely different
perspective.
The Medics came out of the blocks
with all guns blazing at the beginning
of the second half. They were almost
level again within the first five
minutes but were held up metres
from the try line.
The Cheeky Ladies indiscipline
then crept back into their game and
allowed Medics an easy penalty kick
in the middle of the field which was
duly converted to make the score
10-8.
The Medics now sensed another try
and a superb kick towards the corner
from within their own half set up an
excellent position for the Ladies line
out.
However, it was the Cheeky
Ladies who took advantage with an
outstanding breakaway try.
Their centre broke through the
Medics defence on the edge of his own
22 and had the pace to finish under
the Medics posts. The conversion
was easily scored to stretch the lead.
Cheeky Ladies then held more
possession as they looked to finish
the game off with another try.
The Medics defence stood firm as
both teams still believed they could
win it, but it was the Cheeky Ladies
who managed to utilise the pace of
their back line once again and score
the deciding try.
After a good position was gained
on the left wing they held onto the
ball and finished in the far corner
leaving the score at 22-8 with only 15
minutes on the clock.
There was still time for the Medics
to hit back with a try of their own but
they never really looked in danger of
coming back to win.
The Cheeky Ladies held on to their
advantage and clinched the trophy
that had previously eluded them.
On the evidence of both teams’
performances the game could have
gone either way. However, the
combination of pace and power for
the Cheeky Ladies ultimately told.