OSSLT Writing a Series of Paragraphs

Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Writing a Series of Paragraphs
Task:
Write a minimum of three paragraphs expressing an opinion on the
topic below. Develop your main idea with supporting details (proof, facts,
examples, etc.).
Purpose and
Audience:
an adult who is interested in your opinion
Length:
The lined space provided for your written work indicates the approximate
length of the writing expected.
Topic:
Are today's famous people good role models for young people?
Write your series of paragraphs on the lines provided on the following two pages.
Rough Notes
Use the space below for rough notes. Nothing you write in this space will be scored.
2
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Section VI: Writing
Continue writing your series of paragraphs on the next page.
3
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
•f EndjiofiSecBon VI. Continue to Sectiori/VII; - >
4
Booklet 2: Section VI, Question I
RubricrTopic Development
10
Question
Task: Write a minimum of three paragraphs expressing an opinion on the topic below. Develop
your main idea with supporting details (proof, facts, examples, etc.)
Are today's famous people good role models for young people?
This writing task is scored for both Topic Development and Conventions (grammar; punctuation, etc.) using t w o separate rubrics.
Descriptor
• The response is related to the prompt but does not express an opinion.
or
• The response expresses an opinion with no supporting details or provides details unrelated to the
opinion.There is no evidence of organization.
Sample Student Response
^Toiftft-e.
CUVWI^A
poopte
fouAA
Annotation
The response expresses an opinion with no supporting details.
22
Cvc-Vm-U.^
We,
Booklet 2: Section VI, Question I
Rubric:Topic Development
20
Descriptor
• The response is related to the prompt, but only part of the response expresses and supports
an opinion.
or
• The response is related to the prompt, and expresses and supports an opinion, but the opinion
is unclear or inconsistentThere are insufficient supporting details: too few or repetitious.There is
limited evidence of organization.
Sample Student Response
No 1~k-<L%j ttr< T N A ^
ftft y p.t t S.—•S.f^j V*>.*A ..Taf \_i
T
raW
rx»A»W .
a^at <\ff «Ck-.^,
o.~A
cu g qy-t«\u cyr.X.N\«vf t»»i*vaiMj go.f^ ^rvc\
•yv-t.^ Wxv-c - y Q (vMjLfV <^\h-Hv« .
_____
k>4.»|
D
s
0
^«n^U -.iikn roA ^flf ~yV<vvs . Tt\<^ k<wt ygft^lva
Annotation
The response is related to the prompt, and expresses and supports an opinion.
Insufficient supporting details: too few.
There is limited evidence of organization (connection between role models and examples of rappers,
famous people is not developed).
23
Booklet 2: Section VI, Question I
RubricrTopic Development
30
Descriptor
The response is related to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion.There are insufficient and/or
vague supporting details or the connection of the details to the opinion is not always clear There
is evidence of organization, but lapses distract from the overall communication.
Sample Student Response
~Tfidnj{*
- f f l m p u f i Ç)-pr,o(çj
7T7Ï7
V . . 7 7 7 ~
T"H ^
cire,
P
ThtM
Tho/j
k,r\â
are—kind
\rrj;-f
ihfm
a nA
àomA&.
iù
flfcv
, „
q
ifs
mo
n!j
^ick.—pe/iple*
oh/i
qiJ&*
-dr
Unerq
4 h i m
L/)
4M
,TfU
OC
4hfi
Annotation
The response expresses a clear opinion.
The supporting details are insufficient and vague ("kind," "visit them," "pay for them," "donate money
so that they can buy the things").
The supporting details are organized as a simple list with no connecting words and no conclusion.
24
Booklet 2: Section VI, Question I
Rubric:Topic Development
40
Descriptor
• The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient
supporting details, however only some are specific.The organization is mechanical and any lapses
do not distract from the overall communication.
Sample Student Response
1)0.
Perule
\Ujr\\<^
MosA
n£
lû
i\-
VVveL
Çc^oa^
nngfW
\S
t ^ K o v ^
Vo
afe
o\\
V>cx\/€.
ex
rWAA
U)Uo r> YvnQ<^- nP- AW profite
4W*V are v4o,VcWvv^ A U .
- Ç ^ O - M X * .
People
are, cWVdTr^fN AV^rv\ ^e-lP^
_V
people
nflgr_ql-
£AVrr
6eco/srA
6ho< Aà
____
Q £
recv^o^
v^l
AVe^
Ay^
-PropVe
sysv\
wW^
up Ao
nre
cieiv^
>-w^
£ S » / » > A U < >
^
preste
Continuée! onffié oe)<r..pa_e^j
25
Rubric:Topic Development
Booklet 2: Section VI, Question I
Sample Student Response (continued)
\UrA
Qeo^e.
«r>r
fi-
*WV-
V/-yfc-
rNoiAelb
^ U * -
lo
look
up
An.
Arno£
I W Y A
josr
r
-QtL—Çrxr^pu'b
AC
rrA
people
c&__,
bgr.&uC^
- \ ^ w \
Q Y Y X \
r ^ > s l r,Q- A^o rv^
a r e .
V Y M / < A ^
Annotation
Response develops a clear and consistent opinion.
Sufficient supporting details, some are general ("people," "people in the media") and some are specific
("are children them selfs," "guns and knifes as protection").
Organization is mechanical ("A second reason," "thirdly," "in conclution").The fact that the introduction
is a single word ("NO") is a lapse that does not distract from the overall communication. Conclusion
reinforces the main idea.
26
Booklet 2: Section V I , Question I
RubricrTopic Development
50
Descriptor
• The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient specific supporting details.The organization is logical.
Sample Student Response
Mft-jiir.
LJV.IV.
I-.
~JT t w
<O-^OU.C
P. 3 P l g
(°<p«t
nr»
>v.a^»^
fattrttj.''
r|>M»*<-We«.
-fArfc<v^cr»e
ti
i^o^fl
Aie
KJorV
""y»,
ie«f<\
iJ^TTi
Ort
Hftttrtf^
^fo.
r.P>^
p.
bad
AWfw
ci
±bfi
rt«V ?^
flXffWK'
qt-f'rvfr
r>«-*i
u>ort)^
t
-4 ^rv->
t^ro^Wgvr»
Ça
-4>-.T..^t
QM^
,
1
£S
" idrql
«•Yva.ft.j
SjYVft£,ir<i-
t
Iflfp
iiacà
:
viQT-*h
c i f c K . I • Vf, E
b<»qU->'-fn> .
hfCftwitf
W f C W I K >
illude
• Hoe»Qt^'c
\
.
-tv^
^
shoirtltf.
'is
4>»ar*
p-«K,er-
g)if^
H a ^ J t f
i»)Vv. C K
A ^ J
^ r t . ^
ou^d
rU.
CwWtPWrf
<trP
S Q T W
Ui£
Ckf<
m o w .wWh.t ftm—<4Qvrsq pegole
îma^cSi
<Ltinrn,
iSrtd
qiWt
<vo
bad
f n M t
i a
a-f
Q»^<*
la^lc
Mrtt><ìo»<
bvit
ci
•
, -or-
boy/:
^
«'io
•*<~
Vc-r .
-Kl*
tytcvAtv^
Pfopli-
imd
ON/MM^
y o u ^
-t*\e
±3DCiC
io» y
nbouit
.WtUwft
o^d
-KvtnfcJ--^
-Unftf
Continued on the next p
27
Booklet 2: Section V I , Question I
Rubric:Topic Development
Sample Student Response (continued)
Thirty ,
pg-fV^/il
rrf
tv^^m
livr-\
-»y<*«w
T V
p^rjfo/wS.
QVJQI.+
Ua<.
,
OL
-t» d o .
rpt-C-
+v\<nK
ftS
ivn
trodt'
^VMt
&
re^-H
it
f
-Kgf>QC^»>%^
-fiwTsn-i
dont
A w ^ t , , ^reifcirv^
Ça
t>»g
live
ft.
botdi
/^CTKW
r<r>\
r^rx »
1
*Vv/\e^
VW-s
-*v„-<»
<-.^an p o r - W o * .
t ^ W e c . U y ,
af
CjVnw'rt
kg
for
- f a c + , -fperajPjg r i
vy^-^
ivHH»-»
r f ^ *
suCt^
P L - E ^ - W
^
K n q y t
Qv^rpW ,
o <y P r o l a t e
S e r a v. if
\\\*>nn\
Vsra ri
pCop't
ft^e
arcPyVcyo'y
r^\y
f g ' f o û f i — t h a u K ; ftlflPV»
/ t o g S i-t .
f^où'E
CtPT^
f'.Ql
flmv-HMr^
:
Kjr.cnr-tx<i
Tin
bg«wa^
-ftyvoi^S
Annotation
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient specific supporting details. Response builds
a position through the use of details, examples and explanations.
The organization is logical (introduction, each of the four paragraphs in the body relate back t o
the opinion, conclusion), and the response develops smoothly through the use of transitions.
28
RubricrTopic Development
Booklet 2: Section VI, Question I
60
Descriptor
• The response is related to the assigned prompt A clear and consistent opinion is developed with
sufficient specific supporting details that are thoughtfully chosen.The organization is coherent
demonstrating a thoughtful progression of ideas.
Sample Student Response
<-mw- l i o c c , ( a Y v J l - 0 » f « . a g . . g w i f t O U & 9 E ^ r ^ « f ^ W r » f e s o f ; c e r a t o c i Q w v j ^ r i
M m » r i Q ^ — - < • • « - - g i r a r e ^ H - i y f e & s f ^ - v ^ H V f > r « > , a r r t n n - \ t i < Y - i V V ^ -VV<>» |
tenmrvw-JHTW- p y > p * - l y n r t f t \or»WcVAC>-to. w J t V n - ' l V ^ f c L T f t P U S
,-rfvc>
HvOuT^tyv-^v
mr^r*yfr\fr
gotneUcarA j J P , VWieiPf,
t^rv,
nWf^Hr,^
r*»çrjr\çMrsn rte oV^Tfrr
fy^A
l ^ p e n t r p
uMfeff-. Some o«? -MrWtt
n > i
-CWuV-W«> mveoO rete iVwieX
r>y farrt O - S N P averte»,ftc
O-vTriFXNv^
n n r i j ^ v n r f c rvrts n n V .
•^*-M
•
A Y t
=
r t
"J^ert -^^M
>v<?lv
•<• * r« 1^3 Çnr^Ac^fiw^
rvvi3ftAS. Thf^arc rtdLfarOW Jtot* -tViort «Ht o k a
pri«^nV^.TTieAjdae.^n£re^Qr-Hnptr CVAtdirn, Q f j p o r i
m .rHctrtr^g
r+nnnfk*
-fry
Coi.
ftisp, i n ? o o l atone. & r a d . a n d A n y l l f t a rtnna^ril o j o A u d n r i p p i r * ^
•4VieW <3nt3i» Ytatate «kncrttortf, B r o r t n i o d A c t i n g ntt>^ic»-tajJnC)fr
Continued on the next page.
29
Rubric:Topic Development
Booklet 2: Section VI, Question I
Sample Student Response (continued)
Vf-^M y ^ - '
<
ta
V
n
M
"**
Q t ? > r t a s
reports V» \hg meci\e* otorsU^-CfrvVCMS.—
p r i p v < - a r t ctrr«&*<4 CKr drug Usr nr ctrVhVc I v^nYvArAH^iOq. Main
?\<M-C
bffranor
\s
y
WithgLj Se.IV rnr^QgJrwy «yv^ ywiWa-ynoheAj.
*A»vsrHv4 teemVwciedb^ papo.<fa-»T.t,g>nd Vier IVS»\B.«spi<«hedlacross
•VW.-\ot*>\r><r>S,. P r H r e t j fHr-vie*
a
\afr nnd r->f Ve^ - y r t v t x ^ e r - nVr^VAs old-
on -Mr*,-vnujrx \r» rc*ieaulnfj c-rt^t^s. Snrta^rocwrtll^mw-n rwtwlVtaH
Cn*rte
uv*>i+ priver* W»fr»uSe nfr^w -tine-HmoubV»
ttC^dexJi\y«tCKV\
she. U CmrflvmriBcl h^. T>v madia Wie MnCs, ^rrHhei j y.* in-A i l Up
ns -Mne^ do mttVi aft -h^cub>ee\ stats, 3 . 4 - f e r •Nhig y<ntan -faa-Uhlr^y
tatty
fru-t-nrw>
awr>H TW» arp^ ^-w->r^MpuMfr
M
t
ti)-»»,for4ht'areason,-Hie^s,ywjirA
ctt-f
Q
TPrncyii^-^ impaci -fv^War-tlrjg
ha\^, raw! perVYapk rg-firHuftAa yV>ir W*t.
/aptnf
t
•
Offici rnV° m o d p l 3 Q i f r p n»> r\<r| Sg-gcpd rete mcclelC, -t-WftK
r
Oounq Drops* VoOyf ^r* se»TCe
-f*c
Annotation
Response is well developed with clear and sufficient specific supporting details that are thoughtfully
chosen (thoughtfulness of examples is demonstrated by the carefully chosen descriptive details: "nurturing
parents," "there for their children," "jaw dropping $8 million to different charities").
The organization is coherent (use of transitions to indicate relationships among ideas: "however," "others
do not," "also," "are just two of many," "for this reason") and demonstrates a thoughtful progression
of ideas to a thoughtful conclusion ("hope that young people have the sense to tell the difference").
30
Booklet 2: Section VI, Q u e s t i o n I
Rubric: U s e of Conventions
10
Descriptor
• There is insufficient evidence to assess the use of conventions.
or
• Errors in conventions interfere with communication.
Sample Student Response
—
•
•
•
r
Annotation
There is insufficient evidence t o assess the use of conventions.
31
Booklet 2: Section VI, Question I
Rubric: U s e of Conventions
20
Descriptor
• Errors in conventions distract from communication.
Sample Student Response
M,t
oVki^S
fi
Q
beaust
fM-V à& prase,
&\Jtf)
*\o1fj
V\
^ m - r ? s M i t y V . •••fe;i»t ?
<
iKa/g, K i ^ S
Ajo-iL
ju,çy
l^ct-h
^ort -r
**f *
*/4n4
a
WuZaJ ap
<? K
Affini
Starlet
H*t+ H>*y c a n h/lf'tct] ,
v/ -tfir, /<ro£ sq>
4c> tlna+
6 < W Z^LJ
QIQJ
îkzrE. K / V Ç
fa
Kind
u7fot .gfri^ iJi
O A #
r\G~f Wfrh
io
Ml/I
of
^tuff,
H
took
lW<y
Qrt,
inatte h +ty*M -t-Vt<L of
Continuée! on the next pagê^
32
I
Booklet 2: Section VI, Question I
Rubric: U s e of Conventions
Sample Student Response (continued)
ur^ey
<âc+ q r ^
4o
/-hcf-f U tÇ orli a
H q f 4/0-fr
/S /lof
m
4/id +Key-/wfoflif
rtAifc^V
froafcJ
fcyotf/:^
/rte
4hr>u7?
p.U.r\ V M ^ ghoiV A v ^ K C
frff
' ' virym
• -Y
iAf
wïinj
C.& ft? .teres
^ • i V
ajcfiA
H<c)S
—w f -T,y <•
peopptP
+f4**, "
KÏIlfo><*)(
A
ÎAi/e£±7gq4Ïon
f-tà-kr ày.
//fre,
• — vi -
Aof- f//ce <toa^ 6kou/Ç
are,
fe#n^
fl>£
t_=
^
/n/g/^g
oio>9S
~eof °ifcyiyf,'mt-an*,'i
f«*c>
r^Uef)
4h-ei^ '
rvfc&
Annotation
Frequency and nature of errors distract from communication (e.g., lack of sentence punctuation, spelling
of "becuse," "waitch," "want").
33
Rubric: U s e of Conventions
30
Descriptor
• Errors in conventions do not distract from communication.
Sample Student Response
^ iSomri r f "Tnrtnii
rote, irtarih»*,
fl
vy«rv^ rjenpw* f». ••• ~-
iimr jiuir)
W
ninTrjv aroofi,the, uiou^
i^wc* ftcrtvt -Vheir fcns end frrters n>mt QhooV -Hiftnrt. A-fomojs
pwTOtf^ ntMftrs, rrw>\nO\j» oAt*t£ «np&rfcmC*. \p a fritte lite
afWs. y
mvyft uflfA-fo
lite tony Hhft| off, vftir \AflL
^ i i f o x r ^ v r v f a t a Hnrtttft p e a r s nfe is Qll ni/v ^nrt r x m ^ r ^ tc
hrXtos* >puuJLfi» \ n
ry. ys» fit* -VWro an pp<x^'nf^rrP.Wivf>r>p impf»r4- Cm <jyptnrvg
ppopte., gnu nqlQrit-StarV to do Ihûfr o k o
.Afe,
:
Amtlrpr fmayiu^rmttvnrlhinKW . w pec^.-hmfnry fgmrxft
nn> wfrnrMV trip fnrtnPlc f f i p T T I Q f * * ^ , pf» ~VtV> ClOtt^S
-rVnt ttttq Utfrir. for-ih* rpir>t-,,\R^.<&Lf Hrr-Qt fatte \&. fi
Wrtterflrt amnuV Q t ^ t ^ anr\ Ste. ttaU^WW -tyMs f t v
ijrt pappar. Th\c,ròtegirt
ppbafc^ Skfc yvereif nftft-tfiK
n
«sPÊV.httr f&Vftrtte. pofrtnr rearing -H->i<: n y t ^ ^ n j
<&ar\-*Jar\ ,\aVrV* U. V v ^ < ^ f V and W^rrtY<tK TfiK tinte
K opnoa -trink -ftirt Ore
^ riras, Vfo \hfe ar>rt Sr*
nv.riTfte.
feContinued onïtbe ne^Fpage
34
Booklet 2: Section V I , Question I
Rubric: Use of Conventions
Sample Student Response (continued)
^rrh>ta\v^
iftnOi srfe profrnttM f.nrt uptircsing fikf
<^pmP,\AV^r 2ck Thors a bifrffdssnforwhaf '
-Hunt faiyv** fBnptf, tatif^ grO> ttH rOû&.fcfc< ynur^
gefi(l\f
^vA<^^«yoa>nc» cat of ujnn irinn»f fflinfc-thcrfgamous pgtya arc fj-^rt rate rrtvwK ttvr >,puno pcoptf K
)
^ot% Vfrc
wfà
Vvtttu resarV ^> ^ t v f r rtrtrforft,
^oxH^fY taAvrt^cxVcfr ofrATOp, *x> o f t e n f U K
VvU r^/A <-hcq^ P»oV ite rck. Thofe trfnaV fanv^ te (or.
faonoiv;pempte of todQ^ yA-raocjnh op
T?V*
•i t> u a x o v
a s i ^ a r v e , gfcg.\<k
ócaro^. Thevy
VYIMP t o o r v p
rvfNftVfvYiw r»w*A M\YVQ>S» ^ V t h i ^ t c v e r n , arA tow
4 ^ riy^rjkr^-ta interfwnV W>e\r CitJKrvtvs. m m QncOd
ttt-^ ^ w a i r v ^ ^
iha-t- Kappaò Arri fte
of -fr*
ujortel QnaJd » O f i ^ i n g to ti» QttWT pBOÇH. CiPÙ IML
. ^ y \ r.Loi> pf»son lE fljeivpng Airi -foot* ft uiftu^ r>g
r
ft mrflfr shJCrtl.
Annotation
Despite errors (e.g., "alot," "persons life," "someones life," "dont," "gonna"), errors in conventions do not
distract from communication.The reader easily follows the student's train of thought.
35
Rubric: U s e of Conventions
Booklet 2: Section V I , Question I
40
Descriptor
• Control of conventions is evident in written work
Sample Student Response
fatv\OUs people
vell-Knovvn ipyOUnn
people of Wtay Th»c.in o f d c* Wsett .is not- gn obvioUt
pmbAem. fr>e ptob\<T* l ire in *h» ponreygnpte frece
•famed god resjened celebrities of ^oòay are seeing
fer oar you*h. foafa ana TV*pA>W wprescionqfal-e qs-Vhcy
haverc>*yef fevjnd 4te'.r '.rW»nViViec ar>d so -^cy
hedv.ly .rHaetv-tn, by 4hesg cetebrVVter' pen&onq\>-V-iec
and behaviours.. This 'is, becoming an înçnggSingty
dangerous, deve UpmgrvV- in *v\odem~ciay gode-t-y,
f>\rt>riVte^ ana cons4ormy in
nnediQ, outers -&rrpocnr\s,
scandoA, ^rorv-jdoir^ Qt\d caw>lf»ssr>pgg.
tbese **o.m$teg ore. inqcftroprtoU -for 4he yaM\ of
W i g / . Teens should ne*- &*-r',ve>4t> te itfce Bfr'rfr^y
Clears -for '.ns-rgftCfe. She k con**-oftHy '.n -Hte ff^MigfrUqfld ha.s oVrufy ttorreoflouç \rff» Nocnvocy qee&<Aft3n'ies
hgr,ch-e tas prt^U-^iAiUhdtc^c and qlcohb^ord she
canhot- even gam cQsrody of h&r children .This.
example teaches youfrK fa te dofck.n^ revealing gnd
(pg-Vfq.cveoUc.ia- alco Cocher tur ^mAt\
addict'ong
and prObkr/K like ttVis qie qecaptgbb»,
revered
in
sod,-p4y.Th^ ev^mplc ,qg> v*Ml gs ^ q n y en-y^tr
ov€rshq<toY\fe thefrqdi-Koncrtvalues and sorgisi'upheld
by soc\e^y. Other celebr'ifiec SMch qs Nficot-ç P-ichi-e and
foris. Uillon .do no b e t t e r by advocating c-oosV-an-tt
r
r
Continued on the next page. ]
36
Rubric: U s e of Conventions
Booklet 2: Section V I , Question I
Sample Student Response (continued)
frtr-Vy\CK> Ond becoming »ntcnûco*eà
Cetebt\K« do add.¥torq\ rvcvnrv in vr>flu-erci*-^ todqy's
y l s in pqH\eu\Qr', .Mnegrea of bcdf '.mage.
rAo&V stars are px-Vremekj ttïiO, o f t e n «m-Hr> eoVmc)
disorders suih as g n o r r i a of buUm'iq. why mOst- Hrvey
lois* Wis, distorted peiQ»&Wio4 beauty on-Vo tine A ^ ^ Q Q£ ^ou+h \Mno adoro t h ^ m ? Yoa^h ofr today shouid b e
VmgM- foqv>nnec tequVy is much nno*e vglgabte and
importaci 4hqr\ ™rqt- UES. on the ourVoCtp. Ths-h^gd
o->óe+y's good \oten-hofs hov^e been irvfU-kQted fc>y
cetebriHeg.^hoeodors-e mceseanfy their bnarri &C
uiA tj&ro .blond. piasse t>eQa?t-y. Who do ycu -think
ybvvffi are, llsfen'.ng to? Because erf celebrity examples,
mony Houng *omgn and men have a ctar>gferouclv
ton» self-e&teem because tncy gre n o i "perfeeVenc^gjh.
Uieole EichVe \s not- "per-CecV . Ewadqted is r^4- a ^rvrt
look -for qn><on€. Tegnagarc -tend to ovgrloolc-^he -fac-t
that thec-e rai(--VKm -famous fecole hove expensive
c4yi;&ts who manage to roafce qnore<ic <o°^ good
f
1
Celebrities &mpl^ do rsoV endors*» pes!. We
and morals anymore, foutfi should nO-i be -fool-eel by
thic trancpgren*- facade of fam-e.the youfr> pft^dny
AhtxllJ look up te parents, PriPrrik Qnd others,; im.
other s p o i l s : <ea\ peopl-e..
r
Annotation
Control of conventions is evident in written work (e.g., correct use of apostrophe in "celebrities'
personalities," of the hyphen in "modern-day," of the comma around phrases, of the question mark with
rhetorical questions).
37
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Writing a Series of Paragraphs
Task:
Write a minimum of three paragraphs expressing an opinion on the
topic below. Develop your main idea with supporting details (proof, facts,
examples, etc.).
Purpose and
Audience:
an adult who is interested in your opinion
Length:
The lined space provided for your written work indicates the approximate
length of the writing expected.
Topic:
Is it a good idea for high school students to have a part-time job?
Write your series of paragraphs on the lines provided on the following two pages.
Rough Notes
Use the space below for rough notes. Nothing you write in this space will be scored.
2
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Is it a good idea for high school students to have a part-time job?
Continue writing your series of paragraphs on the next page.
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
End of Section VI. Continue to Section VII.
g
I
i
-
J
J
-
^
-
^
1
^
'
'
'
'
' ' ' ' •
\>
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Descriptor
Code
Blank
The pages are blank with nothing written or drawn in the space provided.
Illegible
The response is illegible, or irrelevant to the prompt.
Off topic
The response is off topic.
The response is related to the prompt but does not express an opinion.
Code 10
OR
The response expresses an opinion with no supporting details or provides details
unrelated to the opinion. There is no evidence of organization.
The response is related to the prompt, but only part of the response expresses and
supports an opinion.
Code 20
OR
The response is related to the prompt, and expresses and supports an opinion, but the
opinion is unclear or inconsistent. There are insufficient supporting details: too few or
repetitious. There is limited evidence of organization.
Code 30
The response is related to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion. There are
insufficient and/or vague supporting details or the connection of the details to the
opinion is not always clear. There is evidence of organization, but lapses distract from
the overall communication.
Code 40
The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed
with sufficient supporting details, however only some are specific. The organization
is mechanical and any lapses do not distract from the overall communication.
Code 50
The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed
with sufficient specific supporting details. The organization is logical.
Code 60
The response is related to the assigned prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is
developed with sufficient specific supporting details that are thoughtfully chosen. The
organization is coherent demonstrating a thoughtful progression of ideas.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Code
10
Is it a good idea for high school students to have a part-time job?
It-A
a goal
&rhtyh
<sJ*J <LJs, J<
^ *aKf a
j>ct±-4-t(»^Jo\i
Annotation:
The response expresses an opinion (depends entirely on the point of view...and
circumstances...) with no supporting details. There is no evidence of organization.
Scoring Guide for Long W riting Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Code
20
Is it a good idea for high school students to have a part-time job?
*Vo
W
R
ÉftrA-
job
M
2
4 irti
\».c*uae
«fo
Ds/juss-
u .
35
Annotation:
The response is related to the prompt, and expresses and supports an opinion, but the opinion
is inconsistent (yes in the first paragraph and no in the second paragraph). There are insufficient
supporting details: too few.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Code
30
Is it a good idea for high school students to have a part-time job?
To hâve, a p ' f r f f ^ W job. Hawi^ a ^ A w r i |
give sV\A^pftV NMQf^iirj p*fiCnc^. TVe^wvi'H fp
how kavma Q ; A wofks OrvO^hoUr s fond Kov\<
flj ^
Q
Q6 p f i of tWr
ScJ^cUe
n"5
VvWen
frpphy'Aj
"for
a J n W T W ^ WÛU\<À Q U Û
11 a t VU
Oste
-J
Annotation:
The response is related to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion. There are insufficient and
vague supporting details (... more experience so they would excell at that job.). There is
evidence of organization but lapses occur when ideas are introduced in the first paragraph
(how having a job works...manage a job...) and are not developed.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question J
Code
Is it a good Idea for high school students to have a part-time job?
Joays q
par-h -Km* j o b .
rv^gorft Ls b/rsHJisr. \jnu—^Ve.
Mofigy \ -fhcn——
LfoM
fjon^-f havft -ft? qsE ffimr pramn+j -fbr
ifVT^ruoy uKghi?i»r J / ^ ' won4- -fo buy ^t>r»ig~f^f/>^
7
i4~ JjnUCShrtf'
JCOQ
n*aaer\ u A ^ ^ u ' .
ftrt**rH\rr
j
CH-
t^r>ti
A
kg>**»
l^oiy^
-final
nt
te
t^/giO^r: - K r v * »
j^b
ffeng^n
\^.g-h= - W r * * - ' . L g f e
h o w i r w a P f c <?K>f dng—qnr/
h<3.VA? h o
Jo
J n n 4
UKrfck
^y^^ donH-
jg
-HTO4-
rh
WQ?H-(?T
-hrachgs
-k/
ratf
yoc<
so
i-f-
"fine
j/r>u
how—
K^w -ha nejypgngt'b/g •
£2
fnc+-*±'irr\C Job-
Annotation:
The response develops a clear and consistent opinion and is developed with sufficient
supporting details, of which some are general (whenever you want to buy something...teaches
you how to be responsible) and some are specific (Lets say you have no homework...waste
time watching TV). The organization is mechanical and any lapses do not distract from the
overall communication (One reasen...another reasen...That is why I think...).
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Code
50
Is il a good idea for high school students to have a part-time job?
to j m j
npnir^T
p^/ofpH
lo?Aie>AiP 4Wi-V & is, rx open+
/n ju-Hj-rp ncro^aA-ìcns. Sfrr^pfUcj, ^- -knacks
^Yipfw4nn4- ^erscsnex\
fit&fc
c£
skjcte^fs
hftvu*
all,
-Ha
sfeilla
ftmH
cteA/eicvp
fvwkirP
skills
S o ynu
i>n S u H j e e
ran
lea.r«
ÒCTÌJ|>QAùotnrs 11
f
£mm
an
gftrhf fi^P
^y^fer^nOPS fofid- y n u MW'JI
much
y n o r wteAtafegs
raster
-k> ttevpfop
u s * -Hne^ -k> j t v * ;
<x
pnr-V-h/ne j o b a i <v
us
<x ï-hrfg^fc, J
ariuntfrfogg 4o build r>v\ j-ta>=y pjrpp^»>,c^. )Wny»-Wvx
•tin* WNrkio^
nlte^i^
tAtork ^ c p f e n e y i C g . < £ a i ^
diPferg*h j o b s
4hV>k -Hvi-V (joo UKìTì Wcxrv> UfrUHrtig
«auHLiW^
V> utork soctMfij .*iArV> otfaer
»KtOfk.tirTg p f t f V - M n n f j n l a g
-Mnf. odailfly -rb explore
fy&ed
irif/> fer S-hcfonrte,
frhrteirt
^nr*jiHff<±
hP\irm>
y n u i*M-fn
Sef.nndly, qjpyg w i f r ^ p v ^ n P ; purV-h'rrt jofcre -teach ynu
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
y*»
yflflh such
Pes v e y ^ i f e i l i ^ f g s p p r l £ b c
•*frM* i w p r - ^ r ì V I t j ,
-g»gr\jdoA|
SoCt'nl
to^sck^artd
gfgiUfe. %u cart ctetelop +teSfc
rrfi m ( K r V ^ l . w
jr>ln
whoi ^
fa?y
fe,
^eu
V»tt*r- «m^- i s Mite -fe town brad 4^ + r « a f ^ v x ^ s / n ^ d 4 a k e C a r e oF
efacMtiXj-ks
* ^ho^'rT. qlthtriS ip)4-n
•fee 5 i W
/iflJPky A-vuny * * , I K VtegdfH
jokrs.
fin hr%rf iJQ Wnfl^ftr.'s A(s,mir fib gwnuc^ for -mCigkj n^A ^ftfW+UfrfJota
albata m ^t> i^o -Hii^. (4- Afob aHoMs
top*.opte-
A
bacifi, jpftd syrxJicX 4t> -g^f^yr^vg.
p>onckE5ìfiM \ b f \ j g i » 4W*V flkwn^ ?MiAo*A^
;
yftxjr
^
(gtVgS ' t e e r t y r ç i
fer
pTootftg P A t e r y * ^ seAfiogs
M a y A h e i ^ <3k>ctejr»*s, a \ w ^lAr ' i n v o \ « d in thevr
r W i w i u / i f V ^ and giug
h
\n
-fi*uoP
^
shirtfjita
chance
findr/\vr\c<:*
paSt-Mms
jnfcrs ^
rG? - H I P . ^ f r g o V ? o i ^ i i/tfo
-fo b p / T a w p P / - * o n a b k
cteufìfy
]
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient specific supporting details (each
paragraph is developed with specific details and this is explained in the first paragraph). The
organization is logical (First of all...Secondly, along with experience...Finally...In conclusion).
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Code
60
Is it a good idea for high school students to have a part-time job?
tfrterftsWng -Inpi'c-a T £P«>1 <»i*»ry gWenh^Vtcmlfi VnrtJe. o p a r l - H m o jo6 f n
^ * t c h c o L To bpgm imHh i-k ftfU,^ ^ . / n l f ^ 4o ftarm o lypp r>£ IWQWP.
^nndly
^ giupe;
5gfì<»
Pmofly r f e e l
H* Luortr-ferr^
L
sk^dpnVs ft
o £ ivWepcyiotenco-k% hp CìiA-ììn
u>outcJ 6e
Q
good Td?&Q
-rp
/qarn
.mr*r e x p e n V v i r P luhich mill /*»+U>r HunV f h o n r o A of floM-tWj n elp.ren^-
jnh in ti* -fòftif*.
/ k a •kewogor'j hout^jfrirrifto^flirty ^fepQgCtk w Ijl.iry impoffanl
« w J ntko rp^uirPrJ 4x» hat*, a
sonai lrfe« Tiite
Co*»*=, jiVtro effpcf- / p X ujoufo/
lifen4ojr,4o n mnuï*» o r o i ^ - 4r> rf.Wr u>i fh a friends
lA)ïl-ht>uh frawy,
m n u r g n f i ' o ^ uw> nrp t/e.ry limited
4o fke. atliUI'UP.*
me. ran
ParHvrmore.,
a CPrWin -fypl o £
iP- £
ujfeh 4o lyi.*>
pin>r>U ujill Qn/y pay s o Much. T - P I
nrdet- 4e
£a-
•ki pay,
-t-Uc s t u d e n t ' s
n paH-Kmo
Alonr^
job
iiji*4h 4-Ke. p a t e n a !
CiwUìtngj
nui^W 4-O p u r r W ^ P m m o / p .
LU^TOU4-4IVO
rdpal
pnrerr)-s
i-k»ms you
I^P Uauo a
^
v
f>rj-Ri*> -Prom fYWipy,
a sa-kls-ry/rig
peeVi'ng., Hrxyfag ziur oum job ti^p^ os 4o &>^t nv^A
a i A Q
bam i^
npsOUfT^
yo.; a k o fire. 6emg Self-fit>fiPìcigtr4-< i.jhfch
rwif-un'-fy
pursue-
l*Q«-r% valuable. I m s n m dlotncj - f W U a y .
cJ3miMÌ4Wto4--lr, K f c o p « i £ L^P r W - i
veneree.
Irp
i^awf--fo /e.f Pursers
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
P>rtWrmofP ) utp.nn
\OP
UXÌUÌH
hoV" reWard- o n m>r pnrefiVs fir- euory\h\fi<j
ingerì our I.VTfla Hif5 Q^pfld- to-honly l ^ r W i regfWtoVJrfr
tut- f W &Ll\it\<2
exrrJMVipllHWrteifri- ^
ggr- carwtf Ae U a K
PiftQllsp Qp&fV f m m Q Efertd uiPtiipnirtV-, t^tor» re.n&/infj
v/ft/m^/p iLjnrKovpersPYESL.
TUte
luill
ie, QrenHo
pirknn Q f p f i t / r i R j —
rt^rJt PimrJo^pf^ ^ep.k iV* For evorrvfAp , 4UJO por.p\p rrgVvV- ai A- o £
, tiiun
snww f ^ r l w h o k fwxrl r^i ^1 .PîcnWms as ym i roulnl
Unhxrz&f
ftaMinj
forn job» XP vpu Wig. mt>HP xOorK ^vp&r fence / fou tuill ^Pfl4- y.-K^lf
rjoV-fU prTSilTriift. Qhà^fj, ifnO inr,
lcl
UCT^.S uJfoftl-ycm
ItVo nh(S« i4--jftfe,
Mo-n ^ >^ry^.ra:b Ao( r-n T\ def ote V/ jb^-ri pf it- -froyn ^
fc>r-p T feel 4W p o s i H v e s
cXm r e e f e r
Aro™ f)- o r e mfinrte..
X cA&a &A ftwg Uan^ ^ o l d =.oottfefc^m4o consider- 4->\V5 ^8
cw^dVtovM
n
olr^y
f o r U^>lir fmmedîcth> éen&-FV-l
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient specific supporting details that are
thoughtfully chosen (movie, out to dinner with a friend, certain type of clothing, a more
expensive brand). The organization is coherent, demonstrating a thoughtful progression of
ideas in each paragraph and in written work as a whole, with each paragraph building on the
preceding one.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Descriptor
Code
There is insufficient evidence to assess the use of conventions.
Code 10
OR
Errors in conventions interfere with communication.
Code 20
Errors in conventions distract from communication.
Code 30
Errors in conventions do not distract from communication.
Code 40
Control of conventions is evident in written work.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Code
10
I t y s r> cttTol fk-ci For
Annotation:
There is insufficient evidence to assess the use of the conventions (fewer than 20 words).
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Code
20
Is it a good idea for high school students to bave a part-time job?
Çu \-
^e>Vs
r
he.CtK*-<s.
/Kl
e.*per/*.nrt-
ft-•-<
y^<^ ^of^u ^ygr^ Per IWngS '^> //fgf
i^? t ^ o h v .
VLiVcl
"ter- < - j U - r t g?*=
s-t
gt,'<?/'p[k-
\™V.
Wavy
W
(A<?
CerA>"
yuv«
t-^»w>i
W
<xf . y ^
Vrcfar+f Ve>o«ri?rt?
W
yg^
g< a- p g ^ »nj
r
? ^
VfgtAw- ^ U f w ^ U r>t
V/T?^
^
f
i*-5 A - ^ ^ y / ^ i
l u f/ ^ ^ -
AV.V^<
vv^ X.'c*.
Vot^ ^[u^y?
S W
0^»
VWwJ
<^ 3 o \ .
Annotation:
Frequency and nature of errors distract from communication: e.g., lack of sentence punctuation;
spelling: i, gotta, giving, disiplin; homophones: there, knew, contractions: its, doesnt, cant,
shouldnt.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
30
Is it a good idea for high school students to have a part-time job?
Hgh'^hml
P QmrJ
h A #Y>jre&?i\
ha\&'jix,
stents
r\ 1^ n)/yf nf.timx 4M mr\ go alnry with Hiaf.
£\ffnjrnp
ah <fn,mp pmnh'/nìfouill
ptvp^v^
tptJL for ync^UyÛAaœ.
jwrKfi
ntxfnrifNtiUf,
faym
4mrr\
rnr\
srhnnl ht/h
:
nndplanning
-ihev r^ja/ifi/K
rjfl/rjfjj'hrj
rscfyMrl
tjou
)
n<HM\ n,r
en n al So
-k\ rfïrtijk\ripnfAfa*rCarr\ffïfi
he nnrvi -h^-hrtj rv>ni things
nnn'f
-k\ camjan
. hhs can help <&iripfit\
nr^punHnn
fDnnt^
rwdnj(lh
4r\ (ìùrt.
ina
mMnoihen;
ijniJ -fn rtewJnp?
pfirfSlo
team
Trine
pnr+iimp
of Mp
jr.n
Cjtjj
CnfamerS
.Ut)Plr} jptv
flrifif
r, jr>h< \_inu hmœ -fc arsyihîip
l / x j Aùj f
cltfferenHLf
f
-)hrrhhP&ir
-to nz*
r
nrHff
<&iriçniï
k&jj/Hj
4hr/i^
-in
în 4>j/pn/fhiYj
/ ^ ^ ^ h i ' M ^ hprrì-urinr
m-Ump
and
Up rj Qonrl œputortinf) (Mi xcjmr)prnrtìce
;c a ^rvrj-Hnten ibr
/fc fA&U sis haunrj
hlspîrhcniskjcissils-fn
qôarJ /jjaltiîK
ciz&Jcpp
ihn+
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
nr-h'iMesfte>.<pnr& ary>H--frrrwjr)h
my^n^t
?
hp4ho
$r#$Pd. Snnnfi Qkjrfr/liS (j>+-jrfa
htJ-t-Hnen
Hntv+ ^iHfioiiej
hh> uJnnhihofjritr
Hr>;ncj* \$Vr\\^
YYifpsn^ ;f ran on uo? -tfiém ito Ire anhqpnu La'+h
ÏWÇfiiû
;
•frirfarv
qou <;/Y%i\nl (wader
Qtfqjot).
h&fhnp si^yr*- ri
:—
;
fill of~Hi<*& 4hingç hjL4> -tene
a lotctfHrtjghf
iïfXttâ
vk^aM
^f^rwpi^ina
con^nUm^/^H
fir
q
cspficfolbf if (/ûu n*&t a-w-tf
raxh-s bOT ran
hp -Rjr\ but-make vjrp i± eh*; /&hcattimi
ipur
]
Annotation:
Errors in conventions ( e.g. high'school, independently, responibility, develope, you days) do
not distract from communication; reader easily follows train of thought.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
40
b it a good ideaforhigh school students to have a part-time job?
tf< my optoiftri i4 r< niri £>***>A\(>rt* \d,en, for K ft^V.
cr^rrfM ^h^gjft»;
^
Wti/rf' r» ynirt-HTVn> jota- Tr>rifH('S ynuVW
<g WiorrMnrny^ inrrprtc.i r><j\y
less
rno-h" v o - r r
a n fi
rxìrrl-iAiorYimc
fr-i^f-rtcL wno\>i imrAuH^ t-eot:hin3 V\ne voUtf.
n.
jmprovrriû
tomm I Ham errt ^
ftg
Eyerv as, ex «foirfof I t i m
y^r
PC^PI.^
^ *1T>OP ^ax^nc\f>rr\p/\Y
W-s
J
ruAiQjnp -VWJA-TYW^
y m c / r c i t i b ^ re
V?\iY \ oiKo V^h\Ai ^VvQ-H \r\ p r d f / r Vn h f
W»g-t tyv-iVmgL <~rn?\
p f t A - t i w ^ ^ota
Vie., cm mu^t
e,* p e n e n œ _ j ± i 2
Vtna, 4^XJQVS4
W>e H \ j e
rlf>\iq<r*Wih t r^vìS-V nJftOL V^rri
reowvy
vniUP
ft,,,
^ fY^r^y or-sfi Vhn-V
fhtvt gon>eH «v\f>rïgvy *;V->ml\A t>»r»V V»P Ryg^t^ UC^VvV\\f •
?p^ir>Hhrv^ V V I L ^ Ì H
rnr-hjra
ryrsrl
care YY^f>i r o n r g
ConVrDVgHl nr\dt
TYs\j
fntYkTïV)ftlVft"to—vdhqt- l n m HofnQj-
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
. r u i r V w H r y , n.'î
ThtS
it><s
Sf>
J
rO\e,
W\A^
h<*3 rVO
Joh
time,
rirr>rylvcm-H%fy
rmrf dfr.Vpìfnf
W,
bias
o- rMiY-Vurfrvi rrMp rrunnlgA.
mg^rtVVo
;
irvv>s p correi V>\<>
^MQjViY r r ^
o*y4jf\e>j*\c*A-
Hprr^fiSfS
«
—as
for
bo*
nrx*—pan—Carvy
\r>—mnHcra^inn, and
r»vVY fav n v h ^ r ^
.
Hr>Vv>* uo<vnf
ntV r i
Vh
nr^A
^S\\irìr\
rv\r>y ^ c e t v t
WW,
ì v ^ r ^ Hi r^rcjug
Qxfor"
Hieae
oy,ipT-r>yn:Q^pte
^ V i v ^ <<-v¥r->
-Hno
W^i
Annotation:
Control of conventions is evident in written work: evidence of control of commas for words in
introductory phrases and apposition; colon (e.g., value of a dollar: that I must work...). The
incorrect spelling (e.g., committement) does not require re-reading or undermine overall control
of conventions in the written work.
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Writing a Series of Paragraphs
Task:
Write a minimum of three paragraphs expressing an opinion on the
topic below. Develop your main idea with supporting details (proof, facts,
examples, etc.).
Purpose and
an adult who is interested in your opinion
Audience:
Length:
The lined space provided for your written work indicates the approximate
length of the writing expected.
Topic:
Are cellphones necessary in teenagers' lives?
Write your series of paragraphs on the lines provided on the following two pages.
Rough Notes
Use the space below for rough notes. Nothing you write in this space will be scored.
2
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Are cellphones necessary in teenagers' lives?
Continue writing your series of paragraphs on the next page.
3
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
^ ^ - ^ - ^ ^
[End of Section VI. Continue to Section VII. • •>
^
--"—
\S
:
4
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
f
Còde
Blank
Descriptor
The pages are blank with nothing written or drawn in the space provided.
Illegible
The response is illegible, or irrelevant to the prompt.
Off topic
The response is off topic.
The response is related to the prompt but does not express an opinion.
Code 10
OR
The response expresses an opinion with no supporting details or provides details
unrelated to the opinion. There is no evidence of organization.
The response is related to the prompt, but only part of the response expresses and
supports an opinion.
Code 20
OR
The response is related to the prompt, and expresses and supports an opinion, but the
opinion is unclear or inconsistent. There are insufficient supporting details: too few or
repetitious. There is limited evidence of organization.
Code 30
The response is related to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion. There are
insufficient and/or vague supporting details or the connection of the details to the
opinion is not always clear. There is evidence of organization, but lapses distract from
the overall communication.
Code 40
The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed
with sufficient supporting details, however only some are specific. The organization
is mechanical and any lapses do not distract from the overall communication.
Code 50
The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed
with sufficient specific supporting details. The organization is logical.
Code 60
The response is related to the assigned prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is
developed with sufficient specific supporting details that are thoughtfully chosen. The
organization is coherent demonstrating a thoughtful progression of ideas.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
10
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 10
Are cellphones necessary in teenagers'lives?
O'ftmpld, j
Annotation:
The response expresses an opinion (It is very important that a teenager have a cellphone.) with
no supporting details. There is no evidence of organization.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
20
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 20
Are cellphones necessary ira ieeœagers' lives?
Sample
j
r o d a c i uïiW Crig<r\A^ flLfvfV - f o ^ U y -
^
\ftfNpafW^ A V \ ^ 4r> Aft
Annotation:
The response is related to the prompt, and expresses and supports an opinion (Yes I believe
that a cellphone is completly necessary in a teenagers life). There are insufficient supporting
details.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
30
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 30
0m pI
Are cellphones necessary is teenagers' lives?
^"fio. ~Hve.Nf
\AJÌ\-\\nuA~
\\MP
^
qyenT.
r^W
•Acp A * ^
lose
phones .
nacusfS
£ e lTphc>ftgs nrp
44v&
g€.44fyyg C o J l s
"Teenagers,
\A>.'H
Q<x\uaJn\e.
&<mi«ftnf,
our\A
pKo^<g^ . t k t ^
\%
Cauf%
T-a-1 R i h a
4g*4»
-I o f S
4 a mfe
O^ftOyfn^Tib
'
<3LttJ
VrWhojS
o£
g s,
44^ i r
Annotation:
The response is related to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion (No, they aren't).
There are insufficient and/or vague supporting details. Reasons (teenagers will text
someone who is sitting beside them; teens lose the phones; texting or sending or getting
calls...is annoying to their families) are listed but not developed.
There is evidence of organization. The introduction states the opinion. There is evidence of
paragraphing. Some paragraphs have concluding sentences (That's silly!, This to me is
wasting money.). There is no conclusion to the response.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
40
Opinion
Topic D e v e l o p m e n t
Code 40
Seppie.
Are cellphones necessary ta teenagers' lives?
:
9-
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W\S\\\
•EvtrfrV^ , c rrrtoc^rg
QpjV
Cà£^
CT*N
acr \ ^.TVr
C^VVD
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up.k
vr .yore rft^ ^
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Cryn
gorfsen^e .
ne.-gei
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or A V
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Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
-Q-x^iVv^t
Or^iTOf
ua^
0^
(tory*
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient supporting details (e.g.,
contacting parents, emergencies, contacting friends and family, avoiding distraction from
interrupted calls). Only some are specific (not need to use a friend's phone, call police if in
an accident).
The organization is mechanical (Firstly, Another reason, Lastly, In conclusion). There is an
introduction, body and conclusion and any lapses (e.g., repetition of contact parents/
contact friends and family) do not distract from the overall communication.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
50
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 50
S> CXrn pit-- <£L
Are cellphones necessary in teenagers' lives?
iki
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fr>««ve-s
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phases
y^ou^e
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a
fr*o»fcP
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là
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Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
X-<r
\S
also
f<f^j
,
mrvV
f f
joiiAy
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in
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of
<r><w-flm^ > il
be.
Wavt,
evon
W
u>cu.\à
a f
M)Hf
foc^e
4A
f
ner^s^cU^
e ^ € r ^ n r ^
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erf
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k^e
cVors
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rtSE-
»'4
^
C€l\ p h o n e s ,
be
r\r€L
ftf
^xAàon\^
ÇOCA^
Could
and
<n^A^W>r
Irv&s
Li
and
fa gA
f o m f r n V r r - fe{\
oQK^
a*\à
•\gg(naqe<rs'
tjoiA
:
a l l e y
n^A
Cm*fac\
C O A R T A
feasor
hmfcprt
"b
of&é,
-ffa
-Vf e r t a g - c r s *
5 a m e oJnett,
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P
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient specific supporting details (e.g.,
contacting family, contact each other, contact peers to make plans, emergency call for help).
Reasons are developed with examples and explanations.
The organization is logical. There is a clear introduction, body and conclusion. Ideas are clustered
into paragraphs. Each paragraph includes a clear topic sentence. Links between ideas are
indicated (a/so, because, Another reason why..., So that is why...).
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
60
Opinion
Topic D e v e l o p m e n t
Code 6 0
Are cellphones necessary in teenagers'lives?
r v s r ^ s t t v ) . E\ier\/vMrW \ m
t
CViVspje^ ^2.
r^n^ Hangn° \<k r o n c - k i n t 4<?x-err>^ Qnrf -talKing
ors ceWo^one^n ttecer* s-*uflies hAv<° s V v j ' N n ' Q r g ^ s a qroi ip nF c e u prvorv ( i ^ c ; i s 4 f l w > y r . s . T e e n ^ ^ r s irv4hepfl<a- h»q\/<? dorn?ju.c* <ag yuai UJm-vtu»
eeupfroogs., SO whvj d o
teenq^rt
Oe\\Qnorvȍ, are no4 r v r ^ s ^ r y , A
n o w a d a y reauiry r ^ i i p ^ n n e ; ?
fenû^
t\\f€S bprnt.co 4hey a r e diSiracXtOrsX
gQgrUO-K3a -fcr-taryq ^ q r \ d C c m P e m>c:u<;*»d in £t?u<?ra I ^ n v ^ CeUpy»ne<; are b^nmiAQ rrr,ro ^nci rrprotï&jeycp-Pri
?
.
«I VAi K h -Par- m o r r
QtaiVHies Qr\dqppUcx>^Qr»sj^=>^fDre, CgUphóngS ç a n n o w b-g uspol^fes^
Or€ béCûroi o n Qr\ a l-W>mah>/e -for C^rnpo4°rs: „ T-eer\£ ,o rr> K o q t n n r \ C j -to
f
V\«w o ° U p W w > ^ orx V°>ar>d Q H - r h e
tinne.^ThP
average
-r&fr^ r / s e S
Wisy <ner c f Uphorve - f o r approxinnfl-fekj gfcghV- h o u r s Q A a ria y-^n
day
b a a s , . w\Vh- cei\orx3rv>s b g m g a s e d s o m ^ i c - K ^ m r v e o d o f g g o s K g v r ^
•Vtv. -hrrvP-to-fPcas
on Separò WiOrtc a ^ d -Vh€lr -ranr>tli7f 5 ~? GplfohongSw
p a y a n n a j o r ro\gqg dtsfrrurfons Vn -Mne 4 ^ ( c a t Mugs oC Several
P
^ P C O ^ Q P
Us,\r>q4W>m
and rrxatnkit^
toS.
thpm >g l n e r r a ^ n q . , "Trie avi-era^
S ^
btU OP or>& C€U phonf? ft3mg5 U P 4 - o 0.+
nppncortiiiruASed or\ a n^onf. hQ-=i n r n - ^ f . T-P a
ETQcr\
CA
addane
cosïc.
rApprortmcUMij fl<35 a ^ O r r t H <co nnourvfOUn ^ H ^ v o u t o f 4 o f O f
up-iû
fncn»VKr>r\ HI Pan ex year.
Xrw^ir,
dollars coaid pa\j f o r .
rv>nngcf S rx?rn o n rr-llpl-\or\<fs m a I d b e
g
riort rncrrn/ u<^>q O A ^ H-rAQusong/
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section VI Opinion Question 1
\&pâ4owirrts
v\fotj S
a O n a g e r ~>S ^dnrcHiors or aAO-fh<pr u^or-tHy
cou
So pngçh rmfJAPtj o n QgH OhOng^ W h e n V O U C O U ( d
ynur h o m i p h o n e ? rM\prvc«re m
a waS^e o f m o n e u , .
cors f v ^gfcg nrascAs-gd - f a i r h / e a s i l y , c e i p h o n g s a r e e o ^
\f\ vjfraf Pocke-tand are conytPnlmf-tous/» o o t n e g o »
rvyinv^-Kgf naq^rs U S I
US£
fieUpKnir^
±n rheQ+Or\4.freir
-to g-f-ong
Tt-w'S I S mnc^
4pg4-q
n
fXjb/gf-hufKj
m h P r - t e m a / y ^ -, e f c . -Teervao grSVAjH^CeUPh.ofV?5 KnocAi c y n r - H l j h O W
J<
s4ffre c h e c H n o w ^ - w
-te -fex4-oft^€r<; w H h o u - f -t)-v?ir- <^iA)n
> ^ s a c K g a 5 ^ ^ g ^ ^ 8 ^ t u v w y * t a c - K . C€»ohones a r e cfgnr^r-
feUprvintfs h^rve-HnPtr m a n y oenefrfc
nrf n o l o
ad\faniagf><ì
in ~
r ^ r ^ l ^ j - ^ ^ n Q y / ^ b ^ n ^ r i Ç f f h p ( j û n ( ( j p(gg ÛÇ
r-Atsfractans tn-frTgrr Mes^
grefrfc
ana
ffim-techKOlcqy
pmhl-e
- i f * m -fo N>. (ineHr\iral
f
g n / t y i f r Iwiritnt) ttenayps to a â(ini(tâil\tf)
fflzen^
\fi..
\
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient specific supporting details that are
thoughtfully chosen (e.g., distractions, cost, misuse). Each reason is well developed with specific
details (e.g., going on Facebook, eight hours a day, $95 a month, store cheat notes).
The organization is coherent and demonstrates a thoughtful progression of ideas. The argument
builds from less important to more important reasons (The most immense disadvantage...). The
introduction hooks the reader and the conclusion goes beyond a restatement of the main points.
Rhetorical questions are used effectively to emphasize the argument (...when do teens have time
to focus on school work and their families?; Imagine how many uses one thousand dollars could
pay for.; Why spend so much money. ..when you could just use your home...phone?).
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Descriptor
Codé
There is insufficient evidence to assess the use of conventions.
Code 10
OR
Errors in conventions interfere with communication.
Code 20
Errors in conventions distract from communication.
Code 30
Errors in conventions do not distract from communication.
Code 40
Control of conventions is evident in written work.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
10
Are cellphones necessary in teenagers' lives?
Long Writing
Conventions
Code 10
Annotation:
There is insufficient evidence to assess the use of conventions (fewer than 20 words).
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
Long Writing
Conventions
Code 20
Are cellphones necessary In teenagers' lives?
:m
l a
4*e/ra.%~rs-s
CM
(ere*-ther-t
C <a^>
&g//
h Pe
? /£ r A y
ne€4^
or
y<p^
bacasse,
,k
l<? Y<?<*fJ\
Yk<
y
C
n, (&t /
j s n u
U
r/nrj^
4-//
-?-7 e rfexOie. r,xC±,1{L9
Ca.r~\
cg/f/sh,'
/
Sorfe^
ÇeA(
tfhynr
r.om/p<x*/<?c
JCA
r
ACT v
^^gZ
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
U
pic k
d
c
(rC^ncl .C . . are
find
,A
hjd~
iOe^Cc^
g e
hJm
a^>4, /r?^
4. f~ toys
r<ï'j ? Ca({
ts^c
far-
Annotation:
Errors in conventions distract from communication: e.g., lack of sentence punctuation; spelling
(comunicate, now, your, witch, there); capitalization: (if, these); possession (teenagers use);
homophones (your for you're).
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
Long Writing
Conventions
Code 30
-Are cellphones necessary In teenagers* lives?
-^viagers fiUers.&ilptofts hntón \orie+V of af&S tn o
rtuemy -teennrje^ to rind sftMd nef;fa?a^r/cotel M/
frrrh hatp-ffa Heenoyr ond a ^ m p ù r ^ -their nopftetaiphònfìs
nr£
n
v e r i n i p b c A nP-jPrhnniriQ\t
-rhrtf
nrft nfìeffed grmtit/ in f/iofi<ffinc/fiS -flrrf ptô -^e,rKgRr»'9
In n d i f f e r
^HunthYi.l^xinfPt r v ^ n n i y a < ? H - f e r
sfmpie M y flP
MUftiovniiy
ammAn)catinq
and
-fripndS^Ceilpfar^s hme irta r¥n pros -ffren enfi:-)
(Ttì play a important mìe In a jPQjncMtert IrleHani
n
p f f r p f f t Seem
riìtfmrtior)
-thaï
-t>
sa\j
- f f v r t rr?ilphofle&
frtferfrjg
:
idttA
ciré
,
nHeemyrjg
fir1U<rrtfon. grf -fiat" is sfrryiy r\rt ^mfrnzsR as
-fte rp/fa/mm mfi hp ammirò ((eri in -nukr nb preverrò
-b see Hfie rellphrf ì$ tìtmm'qj a dìswrtbn -fieri
•tft? i i w flr Hte frilptoyg. ffHfirt sfrìf does rvH
(PMftifìy
çmktérns
- M
iront/
r^/ph^m^ ^ * * s g
orp. simply not <wi issue tf-tfìfr) enn aca'/y fcertnngsd -h
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
-fiT)j* trìhn nffi inflitti hnfherinr rr^m-fo/ìHu nayf
in
-fne
fjprtVfiiiriQfô AJrrrfr
of
m
vm&Vefind.
tf-fftft
dn mipiïity Af) cull ffiaork nc 4imih- TrP rfflpvme
z\l?m gÇ on emerqmc\( ^ rfr is o H ? - f f f i r e ff> -tftf-fte user (ftn ^riali^e/^g hjwe(^w% rmfe armoryr/rts
arvi mmmmiŒte
fAititi-fneindì nYvi^hmify.lf^. rP.ttfofiQP
poj m r o p p ^ -ff^r» omfr ^rW OS a universi pìero
Tfwfon? in my. honest cpnbn J jtoofeHfcrt-)te
tanpty put, 4m a n f o r a
- f i e - j f f i j n m a r Mhnm/iû
comw unkptefaxfo^j^ty
errkr^Yìfréi ùmìJca(t\m) \, ^rMm^mmM^
a
i m H y s
k\
a m&rjrnn/
fffe-
nrvf
rnpnrî
mort-Ih
f
cellphone
k
Annotation:
Errors in conventions (e.g., possession: teenagers live's, teenagers lives, cellphone's; missing
capital: if; missing commas for introductory phrases) do not distract from communication.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
Code
40
Long Writing
Conventions
Code 40
Are cellphones necessary In teenagers lives?
1
TrvVKimpS riyyipm S O P Ì ^ N ^ ffinn\jfa-l n<k u: having o r*>\\pr>r^f>
pirvw»(i<:i^rQis4g»va<3v»r';, T e e n e r s
in4hgpfre» hQ\Z^» rton^jJC+
oeuphooes., s o w h s d o
novMadqyç reamer
(
teenQyc;
IS a
yié^ uJrttVKJf
r,»n pannes"?
oeWpAon^ are rvoV r y i r a s a r ^ >r> ^ n a y r ^ tu/<?s b p m i . t f -ti-^y a r e di-Sfrpcfiort.S
?
r c ^ u o ^ o a - f o r - k i r y ; ^ tiAd Carv be m i c u ^ d in gew^ral i ^ n y S .
CeMpwnoes afP b^onrcna nrf,^ qrvrt nryY\o n^/Pinp^r>
VAirfn -Par- m a n -
•for-feX^inq^-t-aV^rxQ-, qo>rx9 OA F a c e b o n k - ^ 4aVCir>q p i c 4 t j r r S / V l d a D S
3
>
footing qannp s ^ qoi^Oj nn-fhg lrvfPrr\of . >or^d miili'orxe r v - i o r r . r e l l p r - O n e y
rtrgbPnomtnq
a n a l4y>mCrhue
fer^rMjVn;
- T ^ S n n *
teqinnmg
-to
M s / n g r c e U P h o n g -Tor qpproxiAan-tehj etqhi h o u r s O n ^ ^ } / - f o d Q } /
b a s i s - Wfrr-i ceuoKfrv?, b e n c j a s e d
S o m n r - K ^ ^ r v g n d o - f e e o S Kg
•fry -ftrrvP-to-focu^on ^r,KcrA >^/TI-K: a ^ d 4he)r - f o n a l i ^ 5 ?
ftav/ a
hones
m a j o r rote a g d/s.4rar-fens Vn-Hra 4 ^ t c a t Mure o-f S f a r a i 4eenSo
P
^ P f . o s » n P UÇAnq-rhPnn a n d m a m k i i ^ n j - r K g m K
hvu OP one ce» p h o n e C o m e s U P 4-Q a i t^q^V
n p p h c a ^ m a s e d o n a nnonf- h a ^ o m^r.
r»pproìflma4^((j
( n e r m a n n ; . Tr>e axi-erxtg^
a
monrth.
T4> a srilcHoné.
a mOrvHn vo nna(n-fQ(r\
ETQc^
ro^f ç
H W O n t r * -{ o f Q f u p 4 P
r ^ o p V h r t n fllOon exsfenr.
T r w i ^ i r v g h o r t r O r r n ^ I K ^ C ; Q A ^ -H-AQuçQnof
d o u a r s c o a i d pa\f f o r .
™ n n ^ s r x r v t o n r y l l p h n r ^ r.ruild
be
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section VI Opinion Question 1
uSrti-touv.grdS a ^ « n a q e r ^ S
edara-hon
ffr~ar\0-ttw
WOT-r^y
C Q { / ^
*vhg s p e n d Sornorh r^ryvtj n n og(t Phones w h e n you c o u ( d j t i s - r
your homi phone? r M w n f f ; nr^ a waste o f m o n e q .
T h e frost
At$&
con
\A
\|(«Af
Immense
dtSadt/nn-tay
mreaged - f a i r K /
easily,
f>P
ry>fl P h O n ^
4 h q - t -HY^
ceiphongs a r e e a v - / -to S t o r e
Tri is'IS
mrx^
m h p r - t e ^ n ^ r q ^ e f r . ^ e e n a o / r e vyjh^ce\iPhor\<?s tCno<Ai
S-Vgre Cheat
notP^-^
OSPrcf OC i h r t r p h a r o s ^
hpry,
.
:
Poc^e4 a n d a r e convjpnifnf-tous*» o n t r y * q o «
+0-PùATtlnn-PCxcHr*od g v e r y
as>
how
from
v^irwrf.
te
-rex-io-Hnerç x/uHhoa-f t r ^ i r » ^uv)n
nqrnfotrs beppqsho Ain, ceUpnones enable •reenaq^rc, -fo gpf a t/oacj
NA^sachas^^ë^^gr
Ce\\pvwv»<;
irHtwvaf a c K .
K/we-HnPtr m a n y
rteed^ heft t h e i r dtsadtran-taggs
T€<?nac^r
S
a^-^^^^
tX>rWrK
cettphones a r e
qnfl
adVClniaqes
cuAwftqt) *\e\rqoûô
-to l u / e -tf-.ef
r
dantyr-
fà@&é? ^-es
in ~
purp>r>&?>~
ft?tA?iY(?cf
Qrogn^
up hones-
rAicfraflirins m Wlr
W S , gnahle -trim -to hp, (médirai
cfftzen^
arB<hcl£fc»»Mch„gtogg gorffffife lending leenaynston rfnamfof|fl
Annotation:
Control of conventions is evident in written work: use of apostrophes for possession; use of
commas for introductory phrases and items in a list; use of end punctuation. The incorrect
spelling (e.g., nescessity, maintaing) does not undermine overall control.
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Writing a Series of Paragraphs
Task:
Write a minimum of three paragraphs expressing an opinion on the
topic below. Develop your main idea with supporting details (proof, facts,
examples, etc.).
Purpose and
Audience:
an adult who is interested in your opinion
Length:
The lined space provided for your written work indicates the approximate
length of the writing expected.
Topic:
Is participation in extracurricular activities an important part of
secondary school life?
Write your series of paragraphs on the lines provided on the following two pages.
Rough Notes
Use the space below for rough notes. Nothing you write in this space will be scored.
2
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Is participation in extracurricular activities an important part of secondary school life?
Continue writing your series of paragraphs on the next page.
3
Section VI: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
EndîpfiSectoiftVI.^onfcnuertolSecboniVll-»»
4
Scoring Guide f o r L o n g W r i t i n g Topic Development
Section V I O p i n i o n Question 1
Descriptor
Code
Blank
The pages are blank with nothing written or drawn in the space provided.
Illegible
The response is illegible, or irrelevant to the prompt.
Off topic
The response is off topic.
The response is related to the prompt but does not express an opinion.
Code 10
OR
The response expresses an opinion with no supporting details or provides details
unrelated to the opinion. There is no evidence of organization.
The response is related to the prompt, but only part of the response expresses and
supports an opinion.
Code 20
OR
The response is related to the prompt, and expresses and supports an opinion, but the
opinion is unclear or inconsistent. There are insufficient supporting details: too few or
repetitious. There is limited evidence of organization.
Code 30
The response is related to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion. There are
insufficient and/or vague supporting details or the connection of the details to the
opinion is not always clear. There is evidence of organization, but lapses distract from
the overall communication.
Code 40
The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed
with sufficient supporting details, however only some are specific. The organization
is mechanical and any lapses do not distract from the overall communication.
Code 50
The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed
with sufficient specific supporting details. The organization is logical.
Code 60
The response is related to the assigned prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is
developed with sufficient specific supporting details that are thoughtfully chosen. The
organization is coherent demonstrating a thoughtful progression of ideas.
Scoring Guide f o r L o n g W r i t i n g Topic Development
Section V I O p i n i o n Question 1
10
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 10
Is participation in extracnrricnlar setivi des an Important part of secondary school life?
"^ì
rforaf
f/NEW*
\nar(^>,r+
Qnr|
Xhotu
P ÀfrffL
ynu
qntrtCMfyf
S*A rno
Annotation:
The response expresses an opinion (Participation is very important, It shows you try
your hardest and shows that you actually wanna Succeed) with no supporting details.
There is no evidence of organization.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 20
Is participation In estracuniculHr activities sn Importent part of secondary Bchool life?
Bew*^ ; ' w a K e
»'Y*S
<yod
or
e
fe<~
%f
x4nxcurric-iAotr
Sfrìtte
up*. X-V
y>A
wo^U
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,
iV 5
v
co»y\
Vke
i'
s
pféo
-\Q
qp^r
be
u*çM
UEH^
im^prj-a^vìr
Annotation:
The response is related to the prompt, and expresses and supports an opinion
(Participation in extracurricular activities is an important part of secondary school life).
There are insufficient supporting details. There is limited evidence of organization.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
3 0
upmion
Topic Development
;
Code 30
la participation In extracurricular activities an Important part of secondary school life?
Pnff
of
blCJ
nr, t,ni / •
SiTinn««*>
k
ScWA
D0fl£±
QCisJ
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i t
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^
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:
•
7. f
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fi£
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brujj
,
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r
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,
/
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aire
y
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,^xy
i
ftmn^Mj
+f\MXit.f
$knj
fon,-
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ry/^l
±2L_
of
fffeal
^ ^ r ^ / f
jtflffr
nè
fefth.^Cri^pt
4XWc
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5r)^
of
\A
iTv
-
\nk
rx
a-lin
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T
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n
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f
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t
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Annotation:
The response is related to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion.(Participation in
extracurricular activities are important Part of secondary school life). Reasons are listed
but are not developed {It is a way to meet new people. To make some new friends. It
can be a lot of fun and it deffenatly keeps you out of trouble). Lapses in organization
distract.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
opinion
Topic Development
Code 40
Is participation In extracurricular activities sn Important part of secondary school life?
toA.Cpcdi&X-k\
M o
tèi
i n
bzuAiplwA
AA-t-P i f c r g M -
par-fir ip^f>.
trip v\-b> 4r>
ùs\4-p/<\r&
f o r
- f ^ Ç (
n f i / a A ^ / ^
ua.
^ r ^ j j ^ n m i ^ r
/i^y-zftjeS
^
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient supporting details {In my own personal
opinion having extracurricular involvement is not important for secondary student. But is a good idea
to be involved in if its right for that particular student). There are sufficient supporting details; however,
only some are specific {uncomplete homework, missed attendance).
The organization is mechanical {One reason, My second reason). There is an introduction, body and
conclusion.
Scoring Guide for L o n g Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 50
Is participation in extracurricular activities au Impartant part of secondary school Ufe?
evenne,
veils
meal
. • p e x y e UÒW> \ n
•oncfrV r £ J W v
4 o u
ferv\\vi|
Hcu
i ^ n
teerea
?g>mqn(|
pfòtofìV^ C i t o / r i ^
C£LiiOl m e a l - p ^ t e
4-Wu
Kn&ui
fifanrLs
(Mfcac^ hc\vp . P J A S S qcMir ìor . Y w ^ a r r f r n c ^
;
c x c ' ^ n r j ' p s p ^ , f(TA.^ b o s ì q M f
CaSkt^.'fof
ji/Sl
Scarce Q f W ^ P S i-|r^u
j ^
iftedtìiM) ?ec>o\& ({PU
V^SIP.
k>
Urii^QTrvij \ 0 g ) a t f \ n o . •equ'.pmp^' W j S ' t f ^ YYM^net^rvi^nPA- ^opn/,
dcsuacs. S c > n p . p r ^ t e ^ A S V
The.
fatti
fa\R&
n
u ^
PcvnV- nffkcri MiAV
H
e x t f û &rrni\rvc
frf.WvA-^
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Pirdt^MLi
Cc*iA
uaròfiV
I
estta ncfctioc L ^
V^QVP.
iSQNtP. \e> fvix'ÒS S c h o o l
carter ^ j - ^
n
t
Wvj3
fcnrkce.
-It,
nnri f t o p n
mrito\o,n
Quaggy
làh\cm
fe,CL\\l|
cm
opart Q f n f l e S
Q A E T ^ T W
fe<
ant*
a\mog*-
l i f e £^fàr^<Tvfj[JLtAf QCJlAlitieS nnnn b e &m nnCittU
f f r hre>V f i l e ,
:
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion (Participation in extracurricular activities are not an important part of
secondary school life) is developed with sufficient specific supporting details (everyone tells you youll
get to meet so many people when in reality you probably already know most of them, it could be very
costly, they don't really help your grades).
Reasons are developed with specific examples and
explanations (meet people thru friends, uniform, insurance, equipment, have to miss school).
The organization is logical. There is an introduction, body and conclusion.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Opinion .
_
,
.
Topic Development
Code 60
Is participation in extracurricular activities an important part of secondary school life?
Ontario Secondary School Lteacy Tern
£
tin Wntsza MMV'MJIC "te atgWfff/h-f. ExtraruYYirular arhy\\r\rx
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Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section V I Opinion Question 1
lise •ttv.or.p s M s fa -tine
UMI
^.y
rXossxoaea. x £ : >Kesg-
VAitW Wrftlrttf ymA U U t e
'cVvflnf^" 'of
frafofohcfl
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rfêoT
l\A
f/th ThrrYttfi» -rhcir—
Iwro a. fn|l_jjr. ftr lAifiMrTrtj/ of 4Keir- cUfce.
S f,lì o I arc In jpc. Tor eyfltaftf^ / r q-u/UrrV who
gftrs ftftciffr ftrofe and is
ablp, t& fv^gif, # £ f f > r f r or ck4?
\s war A iifceiy-te-^ossftfe^ aj^liHas
r.ftwi^icoK
to&te aire, practised
-rp-ff- c - h i ^ K - f
£ ) f f e r i ^ C f e ' IJl-flytfl^Jj
mho M
tei/Ièri
t # hUfafiirxìin^ nt
hft+ Vflte f h e ^ f l f l / n €
(foiyfct_ftfo
U)an4 -ro g e é
fjM-Effort
yoM m-en-r -Hi?
rxrtff frw te -b /fo
nesarf ktu/r>jifr
yP I T
l«-K
f,hh_W
çoWx vvu ^tTtf H~6V\ ' . nfcfi~- ^Atf&iïtftii-
are
aw
a
fha-r-yotd
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mohfj
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=
Collis
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a
tie
ttiibr
nc\\f\)*À 'Pnw\ j o f a r h j fine ctxtivi-rf/^ M/ilt W h s f r f Ih
the |ov\g r k r r ternar. ' «(Maral! tW; vnorr. a f f i r t - /ahrt nflral
Word yrm pint f h K g f r r r t f - r n f r j j ~Hni j r f t q - k r - f - h e - ward,
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient specific supporting details that are
thoughtfully chosen {expand their social groups, develop positive personality traits,).
Reasons are developed with examples and explanations (more understanding occurs, teamwork,
determination, optimism).
The organization is coherent and demonstrates a thoughtful progression of ideas. The third body
paragraph is linked to the first body paragraph (Because teenagers use cellphones to contact friends
in the first place).
The conclusion returns to the question of need emphasized in the introduction and threaded
throughout the response.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Descriptor
Code
There is insufficient evidence to assess the use of conventions.
Code 10
OR
Errors in conventions interfere with communication.
Code 20
Errors in conventions distract from communication.
Code 30
Errors in conventions do not distract from communication.
Code 40
Control of conventions is evident in written work.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
10
Long Writing
Conventions
Code 10
Is participation In extracurricular act!videa an important part of secondary school Ufe?
3b k
-fa-
Morì
ftfrfotybifrd*
Ufrfafc.
>V*
f&b vf rec&Uy &Lù skàdS
P^Mûch&ri CuLr-
lit
sdfi*l
sfa/afa éâû^ kÈÉ* CL (à/ ef W8*kfr 4ïj "P/UHU
IA*4, OLÌ/ <*JkJ/ , <ml ofar SCÂPÙL ïkfij Jso
t
fòt-
U<4â*œ..
l'*A
a
%L*«l
staJfriy
x r** jtol A w Mm h %vr <ìhdr),
Crf, vOwks QfilQljrM. ^ neoJs irions Ly*L mJLfStrtL» Ue&f/£P/ \AÓ/ SLJÀ
Ul/ûs <X fìttiti^ « M * ^
^
AJO Luis jùiibj
o\r
feirtidpiïo* m
Annotation:
Errors that interfere with communication include incorrect verb tenses {"to participation"),
missing capitals, incorrect word endings ("after school they also need need a lot
homeworks, ") and incorrect pronouns ("it is very tired").
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
Long Writing
Conventions
Code 20
Is participation in eitracnrricular activities an Important port of secondary school life?
A.#\,fûflh> ^c%xnr£b QwfaitLbSl
H
o
A
A ^ w
^ u r f i A j j_
^eFf.ï.JC^r\,
_
_
A _ V Y _
^QcÀr, JtoyrtZ^
%
Jerk, N^h^é^^yy^
>
m
W
tinue writing
writingyour
year series
series ofa paragraphs on the next page.
Contìnue
Ì
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
far àfr kMbeoà ufi x^ypxJu'y^n joJJ^
JJyp 'tl/w\s_ ^Af^i ^A^n JVhUCs %TVY*L
$JA<*\*
:
Annotation:
Errors in punctuation (lack of capitals), run-on sentences, faulty sentence structure, lack
of parallel structure {"meet new people, maybe find something you like and having fun")
and missing words (is important part of high school) distract from communication.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question f
30
Long Writing
Conventions
~
;
Code 30
Is participation la estracurrlcuter activities en important part of secondary scbool life?
V^p^Vù^V
•^V'nfe
o_C
4V»<
XliQ-K
,gry Pt
r
M ftft
-f,
1
W C N
MV\Ì?
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t N g ^ o ^
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e
l;ff.
9hsd*t\\
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f>r.«^e.i\rvT«?.S
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ti**-*
M W
dlrfr
_
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^eepf
nyvt-Krvg) ir •if^'fr
/ v r w y ^
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i\
W_n>*c,
(Xn,^
(Y\Q
^ra^A/iry
^ |
UKv
e
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ftfoeV
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ft*
f t
Cte.Y
ft-Jy^
fk.'nk
f „ P / g
_apa
Sç.j
rirta
\
• <?<.UQQ\
af-Wt^
^ O l A ^ l e
-f
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f & t -
fu*,
r o . r f c
^/r^r
h Wa
S/ou
_
far*
q-T
S*ecor_/ a r y
_*cUù»°>i
Wg..
Annotation:
Spelling errors {learnd, angrey, allong), some grammatical errors (them
few punctuation errors (donf) do not distract from communication.
days')
and a
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
40
Long Writing
Conventions
Code 40
;
Is participation in extracurricular activities an important part of secondary school life?
irrffi/purrr;
pdft
n-P Vprnnvbry
- ^ P y . t n g b f rvrf- rv)n^
Crnìplùleìy
scfyW/ift. ^krfefifcy rJn nor- rW/€
-M inkn&A- Ansi n~ /nnu/c/
nAf-Pc lAtGTk -fUfiO.
fimtiuj
tenutàri
I
,
gehfl&|
;
^ ^ n h
rl<n
nnr-
:
hteiÇ
ÌAìrniIrl -JTÎ&O. rtiMij fhspn -fao ì;Ujx> 4irru>^t,^j?nhrìOcj héiììnQ.jftnP
AU//A
/jfeq 3hjr%>rih
nPPri
y
né-
£$h
,?4ajenh
hetirH'in
dbg
chères h* he
:
ptxihipm uu/h
firrfrrù
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shp
bunrk
fMb
làcfc
tAtnwkf hp
rf aouplf
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fàem*
hàt*?
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r
oft hr«vrir
ftfrfrifa
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of
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M^fs tf -e^en trwrè
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of -Hip non-
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section V I Opinion Question 1
In rfddfrnhy ,yk(Jpnh
u)aiH,
râtfter
-/h$jh âne sfac&fnf-lasMfi ,r? ht
S/^^^^énk'
*r&HÌDr
u*Milri-
nòt
>.K ':k.-.
•••-^fe^^lffaqo
J^rJç^s^Ar.
JjSBÊfm^bkf
\...
firm/
....
-
prssïbly
. ^
Horhé
Jfrs^APi*
i.
hr4~ k^u*>
..-J.X
-tEn^'^àr
;
h A. hackee
dpfi^j '
nPfikrdrth-rfrp
h& Ài
hè PrtfyAhlt>
te
/ -À
ê j t
r4 tAm
K
'ìfa^
-^fâ-Moro
Î. •v.-.a-v.;'"'!
r^u/afrfy.
.
»fi
hiïb
.p^â»
_
Lor)L%&
Annotation:
Control of conventions is evident. Complex and compound sentences are correctly punctuated. Correct
use of hyphens ("non-athletic students"). Spelling errors ("to be apart of...")do
not undermine the
overall control of conventions.
Section I: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Writing a Series of Paragraphs
Task:
Write a minimum of three paragraphs expressing an opinion on the
topic below. Develop your main idea with supporting details (proof, facts,
examples, etc.).
Purpose and
Audience:
an adult who is interested in your opinion
Length:
The lined space provided for your written work indicates the approximate
length of the writing expected.
Topic:
Do teenagers place too much importance on what they wear?
Write your series of paragraphs
on the lines provided
on the following
two
pages.
Rough Notes
Use the space below
for rough notes. Nothing
2
you write in this space
will be
scored.
Section I: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Do teenagers place too much importance on what they wear?
Continue
writing your series of paragraphs
3
on the next
page.
Section I: Writing
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
4
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section I Opinion Question 1
Descriptor
Codé
Blank
<
The pages are blank with nothing written or drawn in the space provided.
Illegible
The response is illegible, or irrelevant to the prompt.
Off topic
The response is off topic.
The response is related to the prompt but does not express an opinion.
Code 10
OR
The response expresses an opinion with no supporting details or provides details
unrelated to the opinion. There is no evidence of organization.
The response is related to the prompt, but only part of the response expresses and
supports an opinion.
Code 20
OR
The response is related to the prompt, and expresses and supports an opinion, but the
opinion is unclear or inconsistent. There are insufficient supporting details: too few or
repetitious. There is limited evidence of organization.
Code 30
The response is related to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion. There are
insufficient and/or vague supporting details or the connection of the details to the
opinion is not always clear. There is evidence of organization, but lapses distract from
the overall communication.
Code 40
The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed
with sufficient supporting details, however only some are specific. The organization
is mechanical and any lapses do not distract from the overall communication.
Code 50
The response is related to the prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is developed
with sufficient specific supporting details. The organization is logical.
Code 60
The response is related to the assigned prompt. A clear and consistent opinion is
developed with sufficient specific supporting details that are thoughtfully chosen. The
organization is coherent demonstrating a thoughtful progression of ideas.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section 1 Opinion Question 1
10
Ontario Secondary School literacy Test
Do teenagers place too much importance on what they wear?
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 10
Sft*»\plfc. !
Annotation:
The response expresses an opinion (Yes, I think teenagers place to much importance
on what they wear) with no supporting details. There is no evidence of organization.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section 1 Opinion Question 1
Opinion
Topic Development
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Code 20
Do teenagers place too much importance on what they wear?
ir^yyWct
e\$L
\t>
on
i\W\
qowv^ïo
\ W y
V W k
of
^ecx<
soj,.
S^«np(<_ 2 .
b e m u s e
Ha<V
f ^ S
r
crjivN < y « r g noV tNa^grsoet\\
bimase
Hney \\
V<?\tooo o e f O \ e
V>ot>3 o \ W $
;
Annotation:
The response is related to the prompt and expresses an opinion (Yes, I think teenagers
do place to much importance on what they wear...).
T h e opinion is supported (because teens think to much on what everyone else is going
to think or say.. .they'll follow people, dress how others would dress, follow a non-writen
fashion trend). However, supporting details are insufficient.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section 1 Opinion Question 1
30
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 30
S**«vp | c 2 -
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test
Do teenagers place too much importance on what they wear?
anre
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u;tvj4 4f>p.L|
I^CAC
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every b a j ^ S
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rV3irw°
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iP<tar.
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v^ftVT
Annotation:
The response is related to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion (teenagers do put
to much importance into what they wear).
The response includes supporting details (Some people spend hours picking out there
clothes ...I have seen quite a few people, start to make fun of teens who don "t wear
brand name clothing). However, details are insufficient.
There is evidence of organization: use of paragraphs; expression of the main idea at
the beginning; supporting details in the middle body paragraph; concluding paragraph.
However, this response shows a lapse on organization. Ideas related to the subtopics
(time and brand-name clothing) should be grouped together.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section 1 Opinion Question 1
uptraon
Topic Development
Code 40
S*W©k- "2.-
r*o teenagers place too much Importattc* on wtwrt the}' wear?
^ c a . . A ^ W A A c d ^ ^
fro
mrh
v^Drf\V V o \ a e ^ i W c p o p o l a r
ffirxy \ n V ^ K y W d >~^xy V * ^ fitting in SA\ /
pic.
teoi^0el.^nrh;
fo^r%
nr
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section I Opinion Question 1
arve
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient supporting details around three subtopics:
popularity, attention and impressing others.
S o m e details are general (give them a reason to talk and comment about them); some are specific
(Bench, Guess or Ed hardy).
T h e organization is mechanical (Firstly, Secondly, Lastly, In conclusion). There is an introduction, body
and conclusion.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section I Opinion Question 1
Opinion
Topic Development
Code 50
S<*MpV*- ^ -
Oftirio Beret ilnry School Uttrac)' "
>51
D© tctnagers piace tati much importante on whut tbey wear?
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r v U ^ a i
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fri?
Iftqnh rtVl ;s|Mrk ryv4
evi w i W i . T ^ r w ^ «arsovi r e f i l l r^^rojyg.tenat
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tfoe- -
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Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section I Opinion Question 1
brcod Mi-.AtAffo leer»?n^,u spr.'rd tftç;! c^c poU
\tr£x)
c
f; A
y-V
H i e
S>Tfe t*r,irT>flI
tar*
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f
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c . M r
1
at6^
Vi
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_
Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion (teenagers do place too much importance on what they wear) is developed
with sufficient specific supporting details (they spend too much money; they take too long to get ready;
they feel "ugly" if they don't have name brand clothing).
Specific details and examples develop the argument: (pants and shirts and maybe a sweater can cost
over 200$; they can get the same material and quality of pants somewhere else for 20$).
The organization is logical. There is a clear introduction, body and conclusion. Ideas are clustered into
paragraphs. E a c h paragraph includes a clear topic sentence and details that develop it.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section I Opinion Question 1
Opinion
Topic Development
om.no s^rr-^rp aspa uwwyiw
Code 60
S»t*plA "2—
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Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section I Opinion Question 1
Mt$&t B t a ^ a — W ^ -
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Annotation:
A clear and consistent opinion is developed with sufficient specific supporting details around aspects
of self-esteem (financial s u c c e s s , style, social acceptance).
R e a s o n s are developed with thoughtfully chosen specific details and examples (some role models
teenage girls look up to are Selena Gomez...; Brand names are promoted by athletes who many
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Topic Development
Section 1 Opinion Question f
teenagers look up to. Andy Roddick, an American tennis player promotes Costa Bianca; Some trends
which have stayed in style for many years are the fitted and snapback hats, flats and converse and
skinny jeans).
The organization is coherent and demonstrates a thoughtful progression of ideas. T h e introduction
sets up a context for the statement of opinion. E a c h body paragraph is focused. T h e conclusion
summarizes without simply repeating the main ideas of the argument. E a c h paragraph flows smoothly
from one to another.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section 1 Opinion Question 1
Descriptor
Còde
There is insufficient evidence to assess the use of conventions.
Code 10
OR
Errors in conventions interfere with communication.
Code 20
Code 30
Code 40
Errors in conventions distract from communication.
s Errors in conventions do not distract from communication.
Control of conventions is evident in written work.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section I Opinion Question 1
10
Long Writing
Conventions
Code 10
Ontario SocontiBsy School Literacy Tost
Do teenagers place too mach importance on what they wear?
(PfffitjCiA
—
—
M
jziilf——li
m
122
Qiujo
•wpa/'fiwo
M
.
Annotation:
This response provides insufficient evidence to a s s e s s the use of conventions.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section 1 Opinion Question 1
20
Long Writing
Conventions
Code 20
OQf>£
Ontario SooondSiy School Utsrocy Tost
Do teenagers placetoomuch Importance on what they wear?
CrUty
g<y
i/vip^fa/»f
t
^
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fc
lust.
ti^
f-fl loaf
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msan
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Like,
a Ha/n
r.niûxit or
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f t
(W fifif
Intere^*
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of k,
of
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h L f l q q t r i
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lr
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a
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t
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t/jan-h
yo6
fi*
Aiicfr**
fg>/? m H A A
\ff\9ot\af\i-
fôr
y fin
*»r fatto*
Annotation:
Reading rhythm is frequently interrupted by errors in usage, including incomplete
sentences (Like a team colour...; Like to impress a teacher...; Or a job interew), lack of
clarity (/ disagree...because
if it was a windy day) and errors in spelling and punctuation
(dis agree, through for "though", countrys', its for "it's").
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section 1 Opinion Question 1
Long Writing
Conventions
38.
Ontario Socondory School literacy Tost
Code 30
Do teenagers place too much Importance on what they wear?
TëenCA^prç; p V a x « - V D Q w m r * . incartare*
o « ^Wr4-
u ^ r . r.lMfoi™^
_ -t-txW^^wtofe^^ W ^ - a ^ r l ^«W4--- -
McM- We^<i do rvr*- UnviP 4 n o ^ v j - f a r - U ^ r
r\v>»i\ w . a r > p j . ( W r i t e ufaiAUt^ «^K>
•te Sy*r>rt w < * -W.A Mryen* y .
T f e r ftimtXwnr pC
QOw\d
VM
used
a
\ f pietista
M~U„P..
^ r » a .,N ^ ^ • ^ . i . r » * - i f w , m ^ j
«A\ 4W>. kucfc
r
-firr
samffAKlr^
fti^r
t
4^-»w^.ÇaoliMi«:
J
rasygyj
f\tv^>^
U-4ofcaS fer a taftr»4t> t - ^ j or- r-WnnSP PAoUrui^
t-VfcO»jAcltoftVvftrA te de^CU^-frftjrefcw» f Y , m ; A a i i » n * o W
fWHuS
~.>4K -4U,jr
-JM}
C O ^ O ^ J
^ w n C ft^AVate T£ te<ferV.
Annotation:
Errors in usage such as noun/pronoun agreement {When a teenager wakes
up...they...), sentence fragments {Such as homework, studying...), lapses in
capitalization, incorrect comma use {to buy or choose clothing, could be used...) and
apostrophe use {kid's for "kids'") do not distract from communication.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section 1 Opinion Question 1
^° S Writing
n
Ontario Secondary School Literacy Teat
—
Conventions
Code 40
Do teenagers place too much importance on what they wear?
l^ejtM^&rS ftloicft -fe>>ft nuchVnjW*Wc&
Wrtaf mftinft^—o>fwj> lime,
Vo, \ A
AArX&ir çfrç\r>'i
v
>
ryg>^ oiffbr^ ^nSrH)
Ap-f-
ftteftyahftrei
tfff>
U^toi
-—
l<r^û4 aoa^. "TT^ert» ••«> OL
C^/*K»r- cAo-VWes are.
feffv^
ti****
fa
be.jt>AQftgH
\gv^K f k ^ fesme a s IKefrv. ftUtS, 'tPlkg.
Contìnue writing your series of paragraphs on the next page.
Ttih ta a sacuto document Reproduction emfàpubllcaik& of this doanneM
Scoring Guide for Long Writing Conventions
Section I Opinion Question 1
fltoftffi
o r >
after VKinffi, W h <tô,, W l k , Sfesrf*
ad-iyj Vies,
l & t r t - f i n i e » GVMO*avn ft hpiua "fa
IffwafrS âPadÊ
afVrk V m f i f ^ f fogmfTTfiS; •fikft^ ( >c^ hcute, f^ore
v
Vipr^ l-o ^(ggypuKfeh oA$s*
refraN"
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try 1^44» e.g^ p&^fìaa^r^a ^ga
result
^
fragri SffioiH& fliAdt d&t-KfcF- ftfcVtvi Wt^St
^ffoan o^e^A fiioXt&r -frc^e* flrtuxfo
4
!
Annotation:
Control of conventions is evident. The response demonstrates consistent and correct use of
conventions (sentence structure, punctuation and spelling) expected by the end of Grade 9.