Palm Springs - ManAboutWorld

Palm Springs: The ManAboutWorld Insiders Guide Palm Springs’ heyday may have begun with the early movie stars of TV, but the town’s gay renaissance began in the 1980s, when gay Angelenos started buying the mid-­century modern homes in a then seedy and run downtown. Today, Palm Springs is a stylish and popular weekend getaway in season, from September through May, and never more glorious than it is right now. When LA is a “chilly” 68-­70° in the winter and spring, Angelenos head to sunny Palm Springs for warm swimming pool weather. Despite its reputation as a major gay destination, at times it seems like there’s not much there, there — because there isn’t. Palm Springs is still a relatively small city, with a population of under 50,000 residents. The few gay bars and clubs it has are often deserted mid-­week, even in season, and when the temperature soars in the summer, the town really slows down. But that slow pace is at the heart of Palm Springs’ appeal. This is a place to go when you want to do little more than relax by the pool, under a stunning vista of mountains and desert. There’s also tennis and golf, and just enough other active, cultural and shopping distractions for those who can’t sit still, and a large concentration of mid-­century modern design, making it a world capital for those who share that fetish. For gay visitors, Palm Springs offers the largest concentration of gay resorts in the world: 22 small hotels and guesthouses catering primarily or exclusively to gay men. Here you can bask poolside in the congenial and often clothing-­optional company of gay compadres. These resorts run the gamut of quality and sexual temperature, and we’ve inspected and rated every one of them to make your selection easy. WHEN WE GO Palm Springs biggest attraction on the gay calendar is ​White Party​, ​http://www.jeffreysanker.com/2013-­wp-­main.html​ April 24-­27, 2015, a long-­running circuit party that now bills itself as the world’s largest gay music festival, and whose Sunday afternoon T-­dance is one of our favorite California parties. Other annual events of note include ​Cinema Diverse!​, http://cinemadiverse.org/​ the gay film festival in September;; The ​Palm Springs International Film Festival http://www.psfilmfest.org/index.aspx​ in January, and their ​Shortfest​ ​http://www.psfilmfest.org/​ in June;; ​Heat Week​, http://www.road-­shows.com/american_heat.php​ a (straight) motorcycle convention in October;; the bi-­annual​ Classic Car Auto Auction​ ​http://classiccars.com/auction-­central/129cc-­mccormicks-­palm-­springs-­collector-­car-­auction-­auctions.html​ in October and February;; and the ​Festival of Lights Parade​ ​http://psfestivaloflights.com/​ the first weekend in December. Many Europeans escape to Palm Springs for weeks or months at a time, and many of the gay resorts offer rooms with cooking facilities for long-­term guests. But for us, Palm Springs is a perfect long weekend, an easy, lazy getaway (especially from the west coast) filled with sun, sex, rest and relaxation. ABOUT THIS GUIDE ManAboutWorld Magazine provides inspiration and information for gay men who love to travel. We’re powered by a team of 75+ Global Correspondents, who provide the savvy, inspired and opinionated recommendations that will make your travel decisions easier to make, and more rewarding. We’re not available in print or online — we’re a digital-­born magazine built for iOS and Android devices — with high-­resolution imagery, embedded video, slideshows. We really want you to see it in it’s full digital form, so check out the magazine with a free 3-­month subscription ​http://bit.ly/MAWPDF​. We’ve been publishing on iPad and Android tablets since 2012, and we launch mid-­April 2015 on iPhone and Android phones. This PDF offers just the down and dirty information for Palm Springs. ● WHERE WE EAT ● WHERE WE PLAY ● WHAT WE SEE/DO ● WHERE WE WORKOUT ● WHERE WE STAY Happy Travels! – Billy, Ed + Kenny Cover Photo: (cc) ​Richard Thomas WHERE WE EAT Despite Palm Springs’ historic Hollywood connection and its recent surge in sophisticated resorts, the dining scene here still falls short in the big name/big experience restaurant category. The big resorts boast some very atmospheric restaurants, but they often take advantage of captive guests with high prices and inconsistent service. But for a small resort town, the options are quite numerous and varied. And when it comes to comfortable casual dining, Palm Springs excels, with lots of locally-­popular eateries that offer better-­than-­decent food with better-­than-­average service. Cheeky’s​ ​http://www.cheekysps.com​/ This is our favorite breakfast and lunch spot. Conveniently located downtown, there’s always a line, and it’s well worth the wait. Thai Smile ​http://www.thaismilepalmsprings.com/ Our favorite among Palm Springs’ many Thai restaurants. It’s particularly popular for lunch, and very reasonably priced. Trio​ ​http://www.triopalmsprings.com/ This self consciously hip restaurant downtown is very gay popular, with a super-­friendly and unusually attractive waitstaff. It’s always a fun scene for scoping out the locals, but really best for cocktails;; the food is a little pedestrian. Escena Grill ​http://www.escenagolf.com/sites/courses/escena.asp?id=876&page=52856 The golf course club house here is open to the public. Very good food, with unbelievable views of the mountains from the terrace. Don’t miss the homemade potato chips and dressing. They’re addictive. Rick’s Restaurant ​http://www.ricksrestaurant.biz/ This cuban diner on the north side of town is a local favorite known for its bottomless bowl or cup of soup (if they’re both bottomless, why would anyone order a bowl?) and cuban specialities. We’re particularly fond of the half-­sandwich/cup of soup combination, and the patty melt. Spencer’s​ ​http://www.spencersrestaurant.com/ This old-­school Palm Spring restaurant serves French and Asian-­influenced American cuisine. On warm nights, the patio is particularly scenic, though you may need to dine early or late to score a table there. It’s also a good option for lunch. Jake’s​ ​http://www.jakespalmsprings.com/ We really like the upscale/creative comfort food at Jakes;; really great if you can sit out on the patio — not so much inside by the counter. Birba​ ​http://www.birbaps.com/ This sister restaurant to Cheeky’s is fun and festive, with an inviting menu of artisanal wood-­oven pizzas. The cozy outdoor seating is warmed by heaters and fire pits, and the atmosphere is fun and lively. Cocktails can be a bit pricey, Workshop Kitchen + Bar ​http://workshoppalmsprings.com/ Workshop brings many big city dining trends to the desert: a dramatic, industrial-­chic two-­story dining room with a long communal table, tapas-­sized plates made for sharing, a menu anchored in seasonal and local foods, crafted cocktails and a custom sous-­vide station. It’s a welcome addition to the dining scene, a little pricey (as small plates always seem to end up), but definitely worth it for the foodie crowd. The vaulted ceilings and concrete decor keeps sound levels high;; eat outside if you’re looking to enjoy an intimate conversation with your food. Farm​ ​http://www.facebook.com/FARM.PalmSprings We love the traditional sweet and savory crepes at Farm, open Weds-­Sun 10-­3 in La Plaza, the historic heart of downtown. Salads, sandwiches and omelets are also on the menu;; a little taste of Provence in Palm Springs. Ruben and Ozzys Oyster Bar and Grill ​http://www.rubenandozzysoysterbar.com/ The brothers Ruben and Ozzy have been cooking in the desert for more than 25 years;; their new eponymous restaurant serves up some of the best seafood in the valley. Sit outside or at the long bar facing the kitchen, and be sure to try the grilled fish tacos. Happy hour pricing after 9pm makes this an even better choice for late night diners. LuLu​ ​
http://www.lulupalmsprings.com/ We love the inviting atmosphere of the big open dining room fronting Palm Canyon, but the food is uninspired — like it slid right off the Sysco food service truck on to the plate. Mister Parker’s​ ​http://www.theparkerpalmsprings.com/dine/mister-­parkers.php Set off from the lobby of the Parker Hotel by a heavy velvet curtain, Mister Parker’s is sophisticated, dark and sexy with cool art and a happening vibe. The menu is bistro classic with a twist, at top-­dollar prices. Food and service are generally excellent, but not always consistent. Reservations on the weekend are a must, even if you’re staying at the hotel. Johannes​ http://www.johannesrestaurants.com/ Chef Johannes Bacher serves up a modern and sophisticated Austrian-­influenced world menu in an unpretentious storefront restaurant. While some may find the atmosphere lacking, Johannes sets the local bar for culinary excellence. Manhattan in the Desert ​http://manhattaninthedesert.com/ Palm Springs has two New York-­style delicatessens, and our correspondent team is divided between Sherman’s and Manhattan in the Desert. Manhattan is more modern (and it might be just us, but it feels cleaner), with a warmer atmosphere and a south Palm Springs location. Sherman’s Deli ​http://www.shermansdeli.com/ Palm Springs has two New York-­style delicatessens, and our correspondent team is divided between Sherman’s and Manhattan in the Desert. Sherman’s has a better bakery, more central location, and a more old-­time Jewish deli feel. Zin American Bistro ​http://www.pszin.com/ Zin is always a solid choice, serving dependable bistro fare in an attractive dining room open to Palm Canyon. The $29, three-­course prix fixe dinner is a great value. Azul​ ​http://www.azultapaslounge.com/ We like Azul for brunch, but it’s also popular for its piano entertainment, dinner lounge acts and drag shows. Greek Islands Cafe ​
http://www.facebook.com/GreekIslandsCafePalmSprings?ref=stream Affordable and tasty Greek sandwiches and salads are served at small café tables in this little gem in La Plaza. Tyler’s Burgers ​http://tylersburgers.com/ For a great burger, this is the best in town. Bongo Johnny’s ​http://www.bongojohnnys.com/ Ordinary food at slightly elevated pricing isn’t generally our thing, but the gay-­central Arenas road location makes this a good option for sidewalk dining with a gay pedestrian flow. Townie Bagels ​http://Towniebagels.com There’s no place in this town to get a fresh baked bagel, but we always order a batch from Townie Bagels, home-­baked and hand-­delivered to your rental home or hotel. WHERE WE PLAY There has always been a strong preference among the gay locals for private home parties here;; and between the internet and the cruisy gay resorts, the gay bars and clubs have had a tough time of it. There are just a few to choose from, which at least makes it easy to check them all out. Wang’s in the Desert ​http://www.wangsinthedesert.com/ This is a Chinese restaurant (whose food is a little greasy and a little overpriced and the service can sometimes be overly attentive). But their happy hour is a happening gay scene every Friday night. Hunters​ ​http://huntersnightclubs.com/palmsprings/ With the former big dance clubs all closed and gone, this is what passes for a dance club in Palm Springs. Still, it attracts a good crowd on the weekends, and is the most popular bar for younger guys. Toucans Tiki Lounge ​http://toucanstikilounge.com Although there is a dance floor here, the main attraction is the Sunday night drag show, which packs the place. Tool Shed ​http://www.toolshed-­ps.com/Tool_Shed_2010/Home.html This small bar is home to the leather/denim crowd. Studio One​ 11 ​http://www.studio-­one-­11.com/Studio-­one-­11.com/Studio_One_11.html This piano bar in Cathedral City is popular with Palm Springs’ older crowd. Digs Bar ​http://digsbar.com/ Located in Cathedral City, Digs is trying to attract a youthful crowd, with country-­western dancing and free Wii games. Could be fun. But assembling a youthful crowd is an uphill battle in this town. WHERE WE SHOP As a small city with a large tourist population, we wouldn’t have high expectations for shopping here. And yet, for those with patience, fortitude and a few specific interests, it’s a shopping paradise. What the city lacks in retail diversity, it makes up for with a concentration of consignment shops, mid-­century modern furniture and furnishing stores, and two outlet malls just outside of town. Desert Hills Premium Outlets ​http://www.premiumoutlets.com/outlets/outlet.asp?id=6 This is the big outlet mall, in Cabazon, about 20 minutes from town on the 10 freeway towards Los Angeles. You’ll find most of the usual outlet center retailers, but some unusual ones as well, such as Bruno Cucineli, Burberry, Prada, Versace, Gucci, Zegna, Armani, Etro and Bottega Veneta. Sign up on their website for additional discounts through their VIP program. Cabazon Outlets ​http://www.cabazonoutlets.com/ This outlet center just east of Desert Hills is quite small, but has an appealing selection of athletic apparel outlets from Adidas, Puma, Under Armour and Oakley. Sign up on their website for additional discounts through their VIP program. The Estate Sale Co. ​http://www.theestatesaleco.com/ Palm Springs’ oldest and largest consignment shop is still the best. There’s lots of art and furniture (which might require a shipping container to get home) but also jewelry, small decor items and often an interesting range of dinnerware. GayMart​ ​http://www.yelp.ca/biz/gaymartusa-­palm-­springs If you need poppers or a size 31 speedo, this is the place. R n R Menswear ​http://www.yelp.ca/biz/r-­and-­r-­mens-­wear-­palm-­springs If you find yourself in need of an outfit for dinner or a pool party, R n R sells fashion forward brands with helpful, friendly service. North Palm Canyon Drive ​http://palmcanyondrive.org/shopping.html This is mid-­century furnishings heaven. The bargains are long gone, but for selection and inspiration, just walk up one side of the street and down the other. El Paseo ​http://www.elpaseocatalogue.com/ This shopping strip in Palm Desert is the “Rodeo Drive” of the valley, with a wide range of brand name stores, from J. Crew to Gucci. Don’t miss the Denise Roberge Gallery http://www.yelp.ca/biz/denise-­roberge-­art-­gallery-­palm-­desert — one of the finest art and jewelry galleries in the country. WHAT WE SEE/DO Mostly nothing. For us, the best part about Palm Springs is R&R. Frozen cocktails by the pool. A late afternoon massage. But for those itching to be a little more active, Palm Springs offers a small but nice range of attractions. Palm Springs Aerial Tramway ​http://www.pstramway.com/ Ride the world’s largest rotating tramway up to the top of the mountain — 8,516 feet above sea level. Enjoy the spectacular views, or hike through the pristine scenery. Bring warm layers: it’s often cold and windy at the top, and you might even encounter snow during the winter. Desert Adventures (Red Jeep Tours) ​http://red-­jeep.com/ Explore the desert topography on a Jeep tour. Tour destinations include the Metate Ranch, Palm Springs Indian Canyons or Joshua Tree National Park. Bike Palm Springs ​http://bikePSrentals.com​ + ​Scoot Palm Springs​ ​http://www.scootpalmsprings.com/ Rent a bike or a moped and zip around Palm Springs on two wheels. VillageFest​ ​http://villagefest.org/ Every Thursday night from 6 or 7pm-­10pm, Palm Canyon Drive is closed to traffic between Baristo and Amado downtown for a street festival of shopping, eating and entertainment. Palm Springs Art Museum ​http://www.psmuseum.org/ This impressive 150,000 square foot facility boasts major collections of modern, contemporary, Native American and Western art, including two outdoor sculpture gardens, Admission is free every Thursday from 4-­8pm, and the second Sunday of the month. The Living Desert ​http://www.livingdesert.org/ Fifteen minutes from Palm Springs is the living desert zoo and botanical gardens, dedicated to the preservation, conservation and appreciation of North American and African desert environments. Their exhibits of desert plants are unrivaled, and their new ant lab (a visible colony of 10,000 ants) is really interesting. Hike The Indian Canyons ​http://indian-­canyons.com/ The Indian Canyons are our favorite hiking grounds, offering extraordinary scenery. Unlike most other hiking trails in the area, the trails here follow natural streams, and are abundant in vegetation and wildlife. Koffi​ ​http://www.kofficoffee.com/ With two locations, one north and one south, Koffi is a local gay popular hangout.Koffi offers tasty pastries and generous size bagels in the morning and sandwiches for lunch. There’s outdoor seating and a distinctly Palm Springs vibe to this place so, for a change of pace, skip the Starbucks or Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf in the middle of downtown and check out Koffi. RESORT DAY PASSES If you get tired of the scene around your own pool, you can explore the social ambiance at many of Palm Springs’ resorts by purchasing a day pass (or night pass at some of the friskier resorts.) The Ace Hotel Swim Club ​http://www.acehotel.com/palmsprings Day Passes are also available for purchase 7 days a week, although blackout dates apply. They are $30 per person, and are available between 12 pm -­ 6 pm daily.The Ace caters to a younger, mixed LA crowd, so this is purely a social, not sexual environment. All Worlds Resort​ ​http://www.allworldsresorts.com/ $20 Day passes, weekend night passes and Sunday Pool/BBQ party passes are all available at this frisky Warm Sands resort. CCBC​ ​http://pridenation.com/ccbc/daypass.htm The desert’s largest sex-­focused resort, down valley in Cathedral City, offers $13 to $25 passes available 24/7, and good for a 12 hour visit. Helios​ ​http://www.yourgayresort.com/day-­night-­passes.html $10 passes are available every day, though the resort hosts regular sex parties, with a different fee structure. A DAY AT THE SPA Palm Springs has a number of spas we really like. Riviera​ ​http://www.psriviera.com/palm-­springs-­spa-­services.aspx# Spaterra at the Riviera features a Watsu Pool and a swanky relaxation lounge open to guests an hour before and up to two hours after their service. During slow periods, a $25 pass can be purchased to use the spa facilities without booking a service. Two Bunch Palms ​http://www.twobunchpalms.com/day-­spa-­visitors.htm Located in Desert Hot Springs, about 20 minutes north of Palm Springs, Two Bunch Palms sits on a naturally-­occurring spring, and offers a serene counterpoint to the swanky spas in town. The full 56-­acre resort grounds are open to spa guests who purchase a 60-­minute treatment, or a day pass for $25-­40. This fabulous escape has been there for decades and retains an authenticity sometimes lost at big, glitzy spas. East Canyon Hotel + Spa ​http://www.eastcanyonps.com/spa.html One of the premier gay spas in the country, East Canyon offers a full array of services, and really good value on their prix fixe spa packages. Spa services are offered from 10 am-­6:45pm, and spa clients are welcome to use the pool and jacuzzi before or after their treatments during those hours. La Dolce Vita ​http://www.ladolcevitaresort.com/index.php/spa The Spa at La Dolce Vita offers a full array of services, and its own branded skin care line. Spa guests are welcome to use the resorts clothing-­optional facilities, including two pools, jacuzzi and steam room before and after their treatments. Prices are quite high considering the overall experience. WHERE WE WORKOUT Palm Springs has two gay-­popular gyms, both of which offer affordable day passes. World Gym ​http://www.worldgympalmsprings.com/ This is the largest gym in the desert, gay-­owned with the largest gay clientele, and a club-­quality sound system. It offers a broad array of equipment and a full schedule of classes, a small shop of workout gear, a café and smoothie bar, an indoor running track, stand-­up tanning booths, steam rooms, sauna and a boxing area. Day passes are $18, with weekly, monthly and multi-­visit passes available. WorkOUT Gym ​http://www.workoutpalmsprings.com/ This new gay-­owned gym caters exclusively to gay men (though women are welcome) and offers the old-­school gay option of working out shirtless. It’s a small facility, but clean and friendly. Day passes are just $12, and free snacks are included. GET SMART If you’re driving from LA, Route 60 is much more scenic than I-­10, and often faster, though it has some sharp curves and steep grades. Watch the weather: It can get quite cold here at night, and when the wind blows hard, the north side of town can be unpleasant to dangerous (road closings due to blowing sand are not unheard of.) The Palm Springs Visitors Center ​http://www.visitpalmsprings.com/ Find discount coupons and offers on the Visit Palm Springs website, and at their Visitor’s Center, in the renovated mid century gas station building at the base of the Palm Springs Aerial Tramway on the North end of town. SKIP IT Hit happy hours and the bars of course but maybe for your next visit to Palm Springs you can skip a night of boozing, get up early and hit Indian Canyon or if you’re feeling ambitious Joshua Tree. Both offer hiking in sublime surroundings. Joshua Tree is farther away and really deserves a full day if not an overnight but Indian Canyons is just at the extreme southern end of town and you can easily hike a satisfying portion of it in a half day. WHERE WE STAY Palm Springs has a well-­earned reputation for some of the friskiest gay resorts around, and those looking for a sexually-­charged environment will find many options here. But most of the gay resorts here are not so sexually-­focused, catering to those who just want to relax and enjoy the socially-­conducive comfort of a gay environment. Riding the mid-­century modern wave, a number of the mainstream resorts here have been upgraded and remodeled, providing a trendy and chic alternative for those who like their sunshine with a dose of design sophistication. And there’s also an active home rental market here, for those who want to live like a local — and a great alternative for groups of friends traveling together. Palm Springs is spread out, and most visitors will want a car to get around. Despite the big mountains, the town itself is quite flat, and well-­suited for bike riding. If you stay in or close to downtown, you may get by just walking and taking the occasional taxi. In late 2014, a Buzz trolley service was introduced, traveling a north-­south route up and down Palm Canyon and Indian Canyon drives Thursday through Sunday from 11 a.m. to 1 a.m. Four of trolley-­like buses will circulate the 30-­stop route every 15 minutes offering a free ride to anyone. The “down valley” communities of Cathedral City, Rancho Mirage and Palm Desert are a 20-­50 minute drive, sometimes more in traffic. HOW THIS SECTION IS ORGANIZED ● This section is divided into two sections: Maintream Hotel Choices and Gay Guesthouss See our Palm Springs Gay Resort Ratings below for our recommendations of the gay-­specific accommodations. For ​home rentals​, check ​AirBnB​ http://airbnb.com, ​VRBO​ http://www.vrbo.com/, ​McClean Company​, http://www.ps4rent.com/ Vacation Palm Springs ​http://www.vacationpalmsprings.com/ and ​HomeAway http://www.homeaway.com/search/keywords:Palm+Springs%2C+California. Another option is the very stylish and inviting Thirteen Palms​, http://www.thirteenpalms.com/ a sophisticated 5-­unit/7-­bedroom property in the Warm Sands area, marketing itself as a flexibile vacation rental: ideal for small groups, but also available by individual unit. MAINSTREAM HOTEL CHOICES Among mainstream resorts, here are our picks: CHIC AND GLAMOROUS Riviera​ ​http://www.psriviera.com/ This recently renovated resort at the north end of Palm Springs is, like much of its clientele, chic and glamorous. The sprawling outdoor pool area offers beautiful mountain views by day and inviting lounge areas with chaises clustered around fire pits — the perfect place for a cocktail and a little canoodling with someone special. The hotel was originally opened in the late ‘50s and sealed its reputation as a haven for sexy excitement in the ‘60s when it attracted everyone from the Rat Pack to performers ranging from Elvis Presley and Desi Arnez to Raquel Welch and Bob Hope. The hotel was more mellow for the next few decades but still attracted stars and performers. It reopened late 2008 with a modern re-­do that evokes the glamorous ‘60s. We love the spa, too. (See spa services below.) Parker​ ​http://www.theparkerpalmsprings.com Combining Jonathan Adler’s chic design with expansive grounds, the Parker definitely sets the bar for desert glamour. Located at the south end of Palm Springs, it attracts a trendy and stylish crowd, who flock here not only to stay, but to enjoy a meal at the dark and sexy Mr. Parker’s or the upscale diner Normas, or a cocktail in the lounge and appropriately named mini-­bar, whose gay-­themed promotional video http://www.theparkerpalmsprings.com/dine/mini-­bar.php is a knowing nod to the property’s stylish gay following. Their spa, playfully called The Palm Springs Yacht Club has a manifesto that pretty much sums up the Parker: “We believe in the American country club experience: mixed doubles, a long steam, and a stiff cocktail.” Although this is a Starwood property, SPG elites do not receive their usual VIP treatment. Viceroy​ ​http://www.viceroyhotelsandresorts.com/palmsprings The Viceroy was the first upscale design hotel renovation in Palm Springs, and while it’s been eclipsed by the more recent re-­dos, it’s still a contender. The downtown location is a plus, as is the pet friendly policy (40 lbs. and under). Some of the rooms are more worn than others — don’t hesitate to speak up if you’re not happy with yours. Colony Palms Hotel ​http://www.colonypalmshotel.com/ Originally opened by a Jewish mobster from Detroit in 1936, and very popular with the Hollywood set for the next few decades, this 56 room hotel was recently restored in a ‘40s Hollywood glamour style. STYLISH AND HIP Ace Hotel and Swim Club ​http://www.acehotel.com/palmsprings?pl=visitpalmsprings The 170-­room Ace Hotel was formerly a motel but it’s just so darn cool now: It sprawls out over a large area, offers communal fireplaces throughout the hotel and surprising touches of industrial art. It also features outdoor spa services, room service, complimentary WiFi throughout the property and a well provisioned gym. Many of the rooms have garden patio, a fireplace or a record player (with old vinyl you can actually play, as in most Ace Hotels). Sundays you’ll find a DJ scene at the pool, and most nights there's something to do in the very cool Amigo Room bar — from live or DJ music to karaoke and other events. The Sagauro​ ​http://www.jdvhotels.com/hotels/riverside/saguaro_palmsprings This incredibly bright property was opened in February 2012, a part of the San Francisco-­based Joie de Vivre collection of hotels known for its chic updates of previously frumpy hotels and motels. Both inside and outside you’ll find a colorful palette of 12 vibrant tones actually found in nature (native desert wildflowers). It would be garishly out of place in, say, New York or Seattle but it feels right contrasted against the puffy-­white clouds lolling across the desert’s deep blue skies and the purple-­brown mountains ranging nearby. There are some really nice amenities at this gay-­ (and pet-­) friendly hotel, including self-­parking, laundry, WiFi and yoga classes (all of which is included in the $18 daily resort fee). We love the Jose Garces food and beverage program at Tinto, with its modern takes on traditional Basque tapas;; but not so much at El Jefe which offers contemporary Mexican (or really Mexico City-­style) small plates, though tequila lovers will enjoy their slew of premium tequilas on offer. Their breakfast offered real maple syrup which turned out to be the crappy syrup you buy in supermarkets. The manager didn’t understand the difference between real maple syrup and maple syrup flavored which instantly called into question their foodie credentials. The Alcazar​ ​http://www.alcazarpalmsprings.com/ This mainstream (though lesbian-­owned), centrally-­located and moderately-­priced small hotel was completely renovated in 2011, with a stylish white-­on-­white Ikea aesthetic that feels comfortable and modern. The complex is also home to two restaurants: Birbas, and the much beloved Cheeky’s. Service is friendly and accommodating, making this a great choice for those who want the trifecta of a central location, stylish decor and laid-­back atmosphere. RESTFUL SECLUSION Korakia Pensione ​http://korakia.com It may seem strange to find a Moroccan villa plunked in the middle of the California desert, but the original building of this Palm Springs inn entered the landscape just a few decades after the city was founded. This stylish retreat near downtown Palm Springs may be a magnet for photo shoots, but it's also a relaxing getaway for those wishing to hike, meditate or stargaze in the desert. At night outdoor fire pits, heated pools and foreign films create a romantic atmosphere for a new generation of artists and wanderers. An added benefit: You can walk to all the gay bars. Andalusian Court ​http://www.theandalusiancourt.com/ The gay-­owned Andalusian Court is an adult-­only Spanish Revival inn, just steps from the heart of downtown. The grounds are lushly landscaped — think palm trees and ivy-­covered walls, and the 650-­750 sq. ft. villas are full of old-­world charm — with complete kitchens, whirlpool tubs, private patios and fireplaces. Although the close-­to-­the-­mountain location loses sun a bit earlier than most resorts, the pool area is lovely and serene. It’s very romantic, and with just eight units, could be a great place to take over with a group of friends. PALM SPRINGS GAY GUESTHOUSE RATINGS We were very curious to see what had become of the gay resort scene in Palm Springs, after being somewhat dispirited by the state of Ft. Lauderdale’s gay resorts. Both destinations were hit hard by the real estate crash of 2008, and both have seen an influx of trendy large mainstream resorts — even more so in Palm Springs, whose recent resurgence on the mainstream tourism map creates economic pressure towards going straight. But driving into the the sunshine of Palm Springs, we were pleased to discover the standards of excellence have held up despite the pressures. Many guest houses wooed us with their style and elegance, their attention to detail, and their modern additions. Here we saw the epitome of the gay resort experience: chic havens for gay travelers to immerse themselves into a world of sexy comfort and relaxation. Yes, this is more like it. We went in with some trepidation: Our ratings in Palm Springs have caused quite a stir in the past, to the point of legal and even death threats! But we were welcomed with hospitality and warm smiles. The hosts were almost universally gracious and willing to show off their hard-­work. Even the lower-­rated properties we saw evidenced a pride of ownership. We have posted our ratings criteria below, but our ratings do reflect some subjective judgements by our team based on our personal reactions and particular aspects of our inspections that are more fully described in the individual resort descriptions. One quirky note about onsite happy hour and socials: local law prohibits clothing optional resorts from serving alcohol. In all cases, you can bring your own, and in some cases, it seemed that resorts might discretely serve it anyway, but none could admit it publicly, and we’ve not mentioned or included that in our considerations. THE RETURN OF THE FIVE-­PALM RESORT We shared sad musings earlier that the days of the Five-­Palm resort might be over. If Fort Lauderdale can’t produce a single one, is there hope for any destination? There was a time when gay guest resorts could compete with the biggest mainstream hotel powerhouses, but seemingly, no longer. But then we saw Pura Vida, a relative newcomer whose room furnishings and amenities can compete with true luxury hotels, and The Hacienda, a resort always renowned for its level of service, decor, and tranquil gardens, but one that has raised the bar with a level of sexy-­chic elegance we applaud. These small resorts are also proof that it isn’t always about the spas or gyms or sexual temperature (though those additions are welcomed and appreciated) but about understanding how resorts have changed, what sophisticated gay travellers want and need today, and having an eye for the details that can make all the difference. We want style and comfort, we want convenient outlets for our iPads, we want like-­minded men to converse with while we sip drinks by the pool, we want to escape from the bustle of our busy lives for a few nights — and that’s what a Five Palm resort provides above all else. You can purchase a gym pass or a trip to a spa, but how rare to find a top-­quality resort where clothing might be optional, and gay men can have a night to themselves. Our rating scale: ***** ​Five Palm ​resorts offer quality, amenities and services comparable to mainstream luxury resorts. They meet or exceed Four Palm standards for all criteria, and add a measure of surprise that will delight even experienced travelers. **** ​Four Palm ​resorts offer upgraded and fresh-­feeling furnishings and amenities. Resort and room decor typically has a cohesive sense of style, amenities go beyond the standard level, such as an expanded breakfast or other food or beverage presentations throughout the day;; luxury bath products, higher quality linens, better electronics, onsite spa and/or gym. Rental or loaner bicycles or beach equipment are often available, and concierge-­type services are offered. *** ​Three Palm ​resorts offer accommodations and services typical of a mid-­range hotel: rooms are clean, and fully functional, service is professional, and a standard level of expected amenities, such as WiFi, expanded bath products, flat-­screen TVs is offered. Room decor is typically pleasant, though non-­descript. **​Two Palm ​resorts typically have mismatched furnishings, older electronics, and basic bath amenities. Public areas are less inviting, possibly unkempt or poorly furnished, but typically clean. Bath products are typically limited to soap, shampoo and conditioner. Front desk services may be limited in scope or hours. * ​One Palm ​resorts offer the most basic accommodations. Furnishings may be worn or in disrepair. Evidence of daily housekeeping is satisfactory, though not exemplary, and deferred maintenance such as moldy grouting, peeling paint and/or poorly tended gardens are visible. Service may lack professionalism, friendliness or both. SEXUAL TEMPERATURE The “sexual temperature” — or the relative friskiness of a resort — is lower overall than in Fort Lauderdale. The key below explains our sexual temperature scale. We base this on the overall vibe of the resort, its sex-­centric amenities, and the types of guests it attracts. We include these ratings as sexual temperature is often an important factor in choosing a resort. In some situations, you’ll find the higher the sexual temperature the lower the quality, as sex takes priority and presence of sex swings and gloryholes lowers the resort’s aesthetic appeal at the Extremely High end of the scale. But we don’t think there’s a inverse correlation between quality and sexual temperature. In some cases, in both places, we saw resorts handle both quite well. LOW​ are generally places with mixed clientele. MEDIUM​ are typically gay resorts with a clothing-­optional environment HIGH​
are clothing optional resorts where cruising is likely, but sex outside of rooms is not allowed or not encouraged. VERY HIGH ​are clothing-­optional resorts where there’s a definite sexual vibe, and sex in public areas seems likely. EXTREMELY HIGH ​
are sex-­focused resorts, where public areas are designed to encourage sex. ROOM RATES We’ve listed high season weekend room rates for all resorts. Expect significant discounts and free-­night offers in the summer, mid-­week and during periods of lower demand. THE FIVE-­PALM RESORTS The Hacienda ***** $249-­399 ​http://www.thehacienda.com/ The Hacienda is simply the best gay guesthouse in Palm Springs, and one of the best clothing-­optional resorts in the country, perfect for couples on a honeymoon or singles looking for a break from the grind of daily life. The 600 square foot deluxe rooms are tastefully designed, modern with bursts of color, Spanish tile, and art-­adorned walls that go beyond the tacky nude male paintings we have come to expect. Each room has a small kitchenette with complimentary snacks, Starbucks coffee, water bottles, and, in a nice touch, a complimentary pass to the art museum). There is a refrigerator and an area to cook, should you choose, though the resort provides a catered lunch. The king-­sized beds are comfortable and are of a high quality. Classic literature is piled on the dresser. The marble bathrooms are luxurious, and the amenities go beyond, and are what guesthouses should aspire to, with L’Occitane soaps, shampoos, face creams, and even a small bottle of Scope mouthwash. The rooms have flat-­screen TVs, DVD players, and a lending library of more than 800 movies. Outside, the resort is encompassed by a spectacular view of the San Jacinto mountain;; the grounds are green and lush, and the pool area, where the chaises longues are of the highest quality, modern and stylish, is a place for serenity. The resort is clothing-­optional but with a low sexual temperature. Pura Vida ***** $195-­$355 ​http://puravidapalmsprings.com/ The most stylish and modern gay guesthouse in all of Palm Springs, and now that it has been adding a variety of foliage and greenery to its grounds, is a strong contender for being the ‘number one.’ This is an überposh guesthouse that has our highest recommendation. Opened in late 2011, the rooms are large and flooded with ambient light, have travertine floors, comfortable king-­sized beds that are positioned in front of Fantasy Glow fireplaces and 40-­inch flat-­screens. The rooms are designed in a circular fashion, with a wall separating the waterfall shower from the bedroom area. Other amenities include Moulton Brown bath amenities, a private patio, native Canadian lithographs and paintings by local artists, Keurig coffee makers, iPod docking stations, terry cloth robes, and a marble Jacuzzi jet tub. With its own liquor license, special dinners are sometimes planned and the poolside loungers and tables suggest a clubby atmosphere. The pool is sparkling with a great view of the mountains. Rooms 8 & 9 adjoin if necessary for friends or (male) family members staying together;; and separately, Room 9 can be used as a hospitality suite for early check-­ins or late check-­outs. Swimsuit attire is required. THE FOUR-­AND-­A-­HALF PALM RESORTS East Canyon Hotel & Spa ****1/2 $179-­$299 ​http://www.eastcanyonps.com/ The East Canyon Hotel & Spa, hidden away on a nondescript road, may be the best non-­clothing-­optional gay resort in all of Palm Springs, a spectacular hotel and spa that falls just shy of a perfect rating but still remains an example of excellence in the world of guest houses. With just 15 rooms – and the rooms are enormous – the resort is intimate and sophisticated. We loved quaint spa and massage parlor with two rooms for facials and body scrubs, the wide-­open, sun-­lightened lobby, and the extensive breakfast area where guests can help themselves to fruits, bagels, waffles and hardboiled eggs. The pool -­ always heated to a perfect 87 degrees -­ is tropical and well-­maintained with hanging vines and plenty of greenery. The rooms themselves are huge and colored in earth tones, dressed with king-­sized beds and L-­shaped sofas and Sears-­caliber paintings on the walls. In a nice touch, or a nod to DoubleTree, the owner leaves cookies on the nightstand. Most of the room is modern but it falls short in some areas, like the very old boombox stereos or the unattractive landline phone, both of which were out-­of-­place. The room lacks certain technological advances a resort of this magnitude should have, and with small additions -­ iPod docking stations, for example -­ the resort would be tough to beat. THE FOUR-­PALM RESORTS Century Palm Springs**** ​http://www.centurypalmsprings.com/ With fresh, modernist decor, the Century Palm Springs is one of our favorite guesthouses in town. The hotel features six king-­bedded rooms and three suites, hair care products from Shorty’s — LA’s cult barber shop. The pool is clothing optional, with beautiful mountain views, and handsome hosts Lou and jimmy are super friendly and engaged. Santiago **** ​http://www.santiagoresort.com/​ $139-­209 dec jan/ feb march-­179-­209 everyday The Santiago has been around nearly two decades now, changing ownership, but retaining its place as one of Palm Spring’s best and most reliable gay guest houses. The guest house is modern with a beachy cabana style, flourishes of elegance, and not-­at-­all shy about its sexuality. The lobby has sex-­art coffee table books, a porn DVD display, and a cute photo album of all past guests in the lobby. The high walls are covered in brilliant green shrubs and tall palms, to offer guests the utmost privacy, and the courtyard is decorated with fountains and colorful cabana lounges. Beside the lobby is a small but stacked breakfast nook with two toasters, bananas, bagels, and biscotti — one of the more comprehensive breakfast areas we came across. The rooms are bright and clean with all the modern technological updates you’d expect from a top-­rated resort, including free WiFi and complimentary snacks. The resort does not offer a gym or spa, and while the rooms are great, they were not up to the same standards as The Hacienda or Pura Vida. For guests looking for a friskier environment while still enjoying a high-­level of class, will find the best mix at Santiago. Bear Foot ****$139-­$179 ​http://bearfootinn.com/ This one took us by surprise: two guys from Canada migrated to Palm Springs to start a pet-­friendly guest house, found a space, renovated and remodeled, and turned it into maybe the most stylish guest house catering to bears that we’ve seen yet. The rooms are well-­sized, simple chic and modern, flat-­screen TVs, sleek bathrooms, sexy lighting and a nice red and black color scheme. We’d recommend the king suite which comes with a refrigerator, hot plates, microwaves, iPod docks, robes in the closet and bear paw stamped towels. The grounds are a little cold and sterile, but there is a social area and a pool, so we can’t complain too much. Overall, the best bear-­centric guest houses in Palm Springs, and one of the best period. Desert Eclipse ​http://www.deserteclipseresort.com/​ $149-­169 The Desert Eclipse is one of Palm Springs most well-­maintained properties, small and intimate, with a super convenient hair salon on the premises that we loved. The property is dog-­friendly and the rooms are modern, with granite countertops and elegant linens. There is a clean and cozy feel to this secluded resort. The owners, Scott and Michael, are friendly and accommodating, always quick with a suggestion for where to go or eat to enjoy Palm Springs. There’s still just a generic continental breakfast ​but they have the most raved-­about breakfast muffins in the desert. The resort is just a mile and a half from the airport and close to downtown bars and restaurants. One of the better resorts to bond with fellow guests. INNdulge ***1/2 ​http://www.inndulge.com/​ $149-­$239 (dec. jan, /feb $165-­$285 Of all the resorts we reviewed, INNdulge may boast the most epic mountain views of all. The grounds are very well maintained, accentuated with sophisticated sculptures and a sparkling salt-­water pool (kept at a perfect 87 degrees) as the focal points of this clothing optional resort. There’s a refurbished gym next to an outdoor breakfast area;; clothing washers and driers are available, as is fresh lemonade and iced tea all day. The resort also offers free admission for guests to the Work Out gym, though it’s a bit of a trek. Double-­paned windows on the guestrooms keep outside noise to a minimum, WiFi has been improved throughout the resort, and the rooms are fun and full of personality, with plush elevated beds;; flatscreen TVs and DVD players. Many have kitchen or kitchenette facilities. Guests range in age from the mid-­twenties to the late-­sixties, and the resort has a colorful, youthful vibe to it. Social hours are busy and friendly;; great for wallflowers and those more socially inclined. As we found to be rather common in PSP, the sexual temperature simmers with the higher quality resorts. For its price and very friendly, convivial style, INNdulge is a terrific option. THE THREE-­AND-­A-­HALF PALM RESORTS Casa Ocotillo ***1/2 ​http://www.casaocotillo.com/​
$169-­189 A unique take on a gay guesthouse, this very intimate guest house has no sign out front and is hidden on a residential block. Inside the tall wooden gate and floral greenery is a clothing-­optional guest house, owned by a gay couple, with an unmatched personal touch. Guests will receive a garage door remote upon arrival for the private off-­street parking lot;; a big perk for guests with fancy wheels. Each room is quirkily named and decorated in a different style, some more tasteful than others, some with museum-­quality art, some tacky, some with new flat-­screen TVs, others with old-­fashioned tube TVs. We loved the oversized showers that came with benches and the Chakra bath products and soaps were a nice touch. The narrow eatery is opened 24/7 and includes a refrigerator stocked with muffins, bagels, hard-­boiled eggs, fresh grapefruit from the trees out back and sodas;; the cabinets are stuffed with extra everything, cereals, dishes, cups, you name it. Guests are invited to bring their dogs and some rooms have long dog runs attached. We’d stay here if we were looking for complete privacy and isolation, but the prices aren’t cheap and the amenities are lacking in a few areas. We wouldn’t call it the best guest house but it’s charming and unique enough for a strong recommendation and perfect for travelers with dogs. Escape ***1/2 ​http://www.escapepalmsprings.com/​ $149-­189 Escape is one of Palm Springs’ oldest clothing-­optional gay guesthouses but you’d never know it from the super stylish rooms, full of natural light, and well-­designed. The rooms come with free WiFi, complimentary snacks, brand-­new flat-­screens. Bath amenities are from Gilchrist & Soames. There is a video and literature library, a social hour for guests, a nicely manicured pool area shaded by tall palm trees and 10-­man hot tub. The sexual temperature is on the low-­end and the resort does not have any gym or spa amenities, but the resort’s recent renovation is stellar and places Escape in the upper-­echelon of Palm Springs guesthouses. La Dolce Vita ***1/2 ​http://www.ladolcevitaresort.com/​ $159-­$229 La Dolce Vita is the most thematic of the Palm Springs resorts, with a Tuscan theme that you may love (though us... not so much.) There is a lot of good here: two large pool areas, a jovial host, and a popular spa;; a small breakfast area with a waffle maker, bagels, and Bundt cake, the Tuscan gold rooms with new flat-­screens and marble bathrooms, new hardwood floors and some deluxe units with small living rooms and patios. The rooms also come equipped with microwaves and complimentary bottles of water which is more the standard here. Outside, the pool is heated a bit too warm for us (90 degrees) and the small hot tub isn’t very inviting. But then there’s the spa, a tranquil chic space where guests and non-­guests can come to be pampered with facials, heated towels, the works. Spas of this caliber are rare at small resorts, and this is the only one in Palm Springs that is set in a clothing-­optional compound. THE THREE PALM RESORTS Desert Paradise *** ​
http://www.desertparadise.com​ $129-­$199 A small 12-­room property, sun-­splashed and shrub-­softened, Desert Paradise is a clothing-­optional resort with a low sexual temperature, best for travelers looking for quiet over sex. There are 19 different water features on the property, some phallus shaped, some not, so you’ll hear the calming lull of babbling water wherever you walk. In a nice touch, orange koi fish swim through the water ripples of a fountain near the entrance. As we strolled the premise, we were charmed by the cute hanging hammock, the tasteful outdoor massage area (much more charming than many others we saw) and the sauna. The rooms – each one named after a different gay icon, Barbra Streisand, Bette Davis, Judy Garland – are clean and standard, with modern TVs and nice glass block and tile showers, an extra Murphy bed with some rare amenities like an iron and hairdryer. The breakfast room offered help yourself bagels, cereals, Pop Tarts and yogurt. Inn Exile *** ​http://www.innexile.com/​ $110-­$139 You come here for the sexuality, for the scene, for the chance to strut around naked and steal glances and unabashedly flirt. Inn Exile is one of the deserts’ most sexually charged guesthouses but never feels like a seedy bathhouse. It has a level of style and accommodation on par with some of the more reserved but high-­quality resorts. The resort is home to the most extensive gym we’ve seen yet for a gay guest house, machines, free weights, treadmills, flat-­screen TVs and a sexy lounge area of red and black leather couches. The rooms are spacious and standard, though not exceptional. In-­season room rates vary between $110-­139, placing Exile among the more affordable options in PSP. There’s a breakfast area, colorful and wide-­open, but cheapened with graphic framed porn photos on the walls -­ not something you want to stare at while you’re eating. Its biggest detractor was its sterile, concrete feel that left us feeling cold. Of the high sexual temperature properties, it’s the only one that does not offer day passes. Registered guests are welcome to invite a friend, and its not uncommon to see guys trying to sneak in behind a guest to get in on some of the action. La Dolce Vita ​*** ​http://www.ladolcevitaresort.com/​ $159-­$229 La Dolce Vita is the most thematic of the Palm Springs resorts, with a Tuscan theme rooted in the 1980s, which is appealing to some. There is a lot of good here: two large pool areas, jovial hosts, and a popular spa;; a small outdoor breakfast area with a waffle maker, bagels, and Bundt cake. Some units have small living rooms and patios. The rooms also come equipped with small microwaves and vintage coffee makers. Outside, the pool is heated a bit too warm for us (90 degrees) and the small hot tub isn’t very inviting, but the grounds are very green and well-­maintained. The on-­site, men-­only spa is a tranquil space where guests and non-­guests can come to be pampered for facials, massages and back treatments -­-­ all at rather inflated prices compared to most city spas. The big difference here is the registered masseurs and aestheticians, and the clientele is all male. This is the only spa in Palm Springs that is set in a clothing optional compound. Tortuga de Sol *** ​http://www.tortugadelsol.com/​ $199-­$269 Tortuga del Sol is a friendly resort, clothing-­optional with a very low sexual temperature, and while it wouldn’t be our first choice, it has its charms and is priced so affordably with some rooms under $100 it may be the best guesthouse when traveling on a budget. You’ll first notice tortoises swimming in a small pond just before the open lawn where guests can lounge by the pool in various stages of undress, nap on the hammock, or listen to the crackle of the fire pit at night. The resort has five different room types, all reminiscent of Spanish haciendas, each with full kitchens, flat-­screens, and a design well-­matched for the city. The bathrooms did include mouthwash and conditioner – a step above most amenities – but the old tile walls, rusted metal and worn shower floors were a letdown. THE TWO-­AND-­A-­HALF PALM RESORTS Triangle Inn **1/2 ​http://www.triangle-­inn.com/​ ​$125-­$499 The Triangle Inn is a small and somewhat dated guesthouse, though the level of antiquation varied from room-­to-­room – each with a different design, but none that left us impressed. The entrance is shrouded in greenery and the pool area, while small, was well-­maintained with a area to barbeque and lunch with the boys. A history of professional ownership and friendly service keeps the Triangle Inn deservedly popular with repeat guests. But the rooms were dressed with tacky furniture, mid-­century chairs and old tube TVs, and falling just below the average standards of Palm Springs guesthouses. One unusual option, however, is the owner’s house behind the resort — a sophisticated and sexy house available for rent with a private and stunning stone pool in the backyard. THE TWO-­PALM RESORTS El Mirasol ** ​http://www.elmirasol.com/​ $119-­159 El Mirasol first opened its doors in 1975, one of, if not the first gay resorts anywhere. Unfortunately, it’s failed to maintain its innovator status, and is in need of a facelift and a gentle nudge into the modern era. The staff is friendly but the rooms, while large and absolutely fresh-­smelling, are dark and drab, with old armoires, dated tube TVs, tacky sun-­shaped headboards, and... a kitschy leopard print ironing board. The kitchen is big but plain, dim and bland, with faded yellow countertops. The pool area is also forgettable and seemed to have very little going on. It’s not all bad news here: the website announces a seventh night free, should you choose to stay. We also liked the breakfast/cafe area, lit with ambient sunlight. The resort promises a lot of upgrades are to come and while we suggest avoiding for now, check back to see if the changes they’ve promised materialize. All Worlds Resort ** All Worlds is a resort and a porn production company, and seems to be in a transitional phase as it recently underwent a management shift. It’s a large resort with a strong social and sex focus, with some rooms that are utterly bland, some semi-­stylish, and some tacky. All of the rooms are pretty large, most with full-­kitchens, and all have flat-­screens except for two, and the cleanliness of the bathrooms varied room-­to-­room, though the bath products were all on the cheap end. We liked the large premises, the two pools and jacuzzis, but the gym was sad and skippable, and the sex dungeon was ultra-­seedy, dark and full of swings and slings and gloryholes. It’s size, Warm Sands location, day and night passes, and frequent parties and events keeps it busy and popular. There is an odd self-­service kiosk out front, where guests can book a room by swiping their credit card and dealing with a machine. We recommend avoiding this feature;; management says it’ll likely be removed and until then, we suggest booking your rooms through an actual person. THE ONE-­AND-­A-­HALF PALM RESORTS Chaps Inn *1/2 ​http://www.chapsinn.com/​ $114-­154 The first thing you’ll notice is the sex swing hanging inside the leather and wood fort. Beside that is a sex bench, some dangling chain shackles, and in the distance, some medieval device used for restraints. This is the Chaps Inn, a Palm Springs hotel you could easily confuse with a bathhouse, attracting older bears and leather daddies looking for some fetishistic fun in the sun. The rooms are forgettable, outdated, and quite cheerless. There’s an enormous library of scattered porn in the office (apparently, the final resting place for many an old XXX VHS tape), a small tile sauna, and a pool area. There are few old-­school leather/fetish resorts left, and if that’s what you’re looking for, Chaps Inn serves its purpose. CCBC *1/2 ​http://pridenation.com/ccbc/index.html​ $109-­230 A nice drive down to Cathedral City will bring you to CCBC, a sex-­focused playground with rainbow-­colored buildings, a penis arch, and assorted glory holes and sex platforms hidden in what seemed to be an eroticized replica of a military bunker. When we arrived they had just finished cleaning up an orgy in a tent, so needless to say, if you have a fetish, chances are your needs will be met at CCPS. The rooms themselves are pretty pedestrian but nothing offensive: a small space with Motel 6 bedspreads but very clean bathrooms and updated with flat-­screens. They are one of the few guest houses in the area to offer guest passes and while there’s a time limit, our tour guide told us guests stay on, sometimes, for days. Budget travelers can rent a campsite, or an onsite tent. If you’re looking for high sexual temperature, this is the place, otherwise, you can do better. Vista Grande/Mirage *1/2 ​http://www.mirage4men.com/​ $99-­349 The first thing you’ll likely notice is the astroturf around the pool area;; this is the first sign this three-­complex-­in-­one resort needs to make some serious changes. Some rooms have undergone changes: new countertops, TVs, and floors, but others are still trapped two decades behind with drab purple carpets, old tube TVs (though large), and clashing colors and out-­of-­date furniture. There’s a nice mini-­waterfall near the end of the resort, a huge, nicely tiled steam room, some interesting Japanese art in the rooms, and we like the fact that guests return again and again, adding a level of comfort and familiarity. In terms of sexual temperature, it’s designed to be high, but appeared less so, it’s small outdoor play area having been eclipsed by CCBC and it’s neighbor All Worlds. The owners are kind and we’d like to see them continue with their changes. Helios *1/2 ​http://heliosgayresort.com/​ ​$109-­189 Helios starts out nice and calm with a still pool and a simple lawn. The rooms have a not-­so-­cute safari theme, and despite some modern touches, are too dark, dated, and tacky. Around the corner is when things start to change. First you’ll find an outdoor eating area and a small kitchenette with a TV playing porn. Beside the breakfast nook is a sex harness, gloryholes, a sex bench, a slave cage, and an outdoor bed. And in case of inclement weather, there’s also an extensive indoor sex area with more of everything: harnesses, beds, porn, restraints, you name it. Helios’ has perhaps the highest sexual temperature of all the resorts, and its sexuality is unassuming at first. The place is popular for its play weekends and for its Tuesday party for older guys, so if sex is on the top of your vacation list, book accordingly, otherwise, stay elsewhere. Canyon Club *1/2 ​http://www.canyonclubhotel.com/​ $89-­179 Canyon Club has some positives but overall the resort needs an upgrade. If you were to judge it by its website, you’d expect a tropical, modern resort swarming with buff, sexy men sipping cocktails, but that’s not the story here. The rooms are pretty forgettable and despite the pool, the resort is pretty bare. The sexual temperature is fairly high as they can boast the first legitimate sex maze we’ve seen, complete with oversized hedges. You can imagine what goes down in the sex maze so we won’t get into it. There’s also an actual sex room if you’d prefer. The hotel is OK and the staff is friendly, but could use some cleaning and some modernizing. Extra points for the bath towels being twisted to look like a cute elephant.