KEY WEST, FLORIDA • JULY 13, 2007
Transcription
KEY WEST, FLORIDA • JULY 13, 2007
Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page www.kwtn.com KEY WEST, FLORIDA • JULY 13, 2007 Former Chief Code Enforcement Officer Accuses Bethel of Lying About Complaints by Dennis Reeves Cooper Jim Young, the City of Key West’s former Chief Code Enforcement Officer, this week accused City Commissioner Harry Bethel of lying when he said at a City Commission meeting last October 3 that he had an “inch-thick file” of complaints about Code Enforcement. Young and his attorney, Hugh Morgan, have asked Judge Mark Jones to compel the City to produce hundreds of records they have requested as evidence in Young’s wrongful termination lawsuit. Young was fired by then-City Manager Julio Avael in October, shortly EMAILS SHOW THAT BETHEL WAS IN ON DISCUSSIONS TO CONSIDER MOVING CODE ENFORCEMENT TO FIRE DEPARTMENT after Bethel and Commissioner Danny Kolhage publicly criticized Code Enforcement during that Commission meeting. Young testified at a hearing before Jones Tuesday. Young told Key West the Newspaper that he does not believe that Bethel had any complaints, much less an inchthick file. “Our public records re- quest includes those complaints,” Young said. “If he has them, he is required by law to produce them.” Young said he believes that Bethel was simply unhappy that his son had been cited by Code Enforcement for construction without a permit. During the hearing Tuesday, Young told Judge Jones that See HEARING, page 9 PROFILE Young Designer Making Her Mark In Fashion World by Rhonda Linseman Fashionista Jennifer Potter is a fifth generation Conch who is beginning to make her mark on the world without severing her deep Key West roots. Potter grew up on the docks of Charter Boat Row as one of the daughters of the infamous Captain Johnny Potter and his angel of a wife for whom the boat “Cha-Cha” was named. Jennifer graduated from Key West High School in 2004 and was a founding partner of “Joven Fashions” the same year. She designs and creates an eclectic collection of dresses, See FASHION, page 6 page one commentary Wisteria: Annexation May Be Temporarily Dead, But Commission Should Still Approve a Referendum A REFERENDUM IN OCTOBER WOULD ALLOW TIME FOR BOTH SIDES TO PRESENT THE PROS AND CONS OF ANNEXATION. AND CANDIDATES WOULD BE FORCED TO TAKE A STAND by Dennis Reeves Cooper Apparently, an intensive lobbying campaign by the owners and potential developers of Wisteria Island— including a lavish dinner for three City Commissioners on Sunset Key last May— failed to produce four votes to approve annexation of the island into the City. So they pulled the item off the Commission agenda for this coming Tuesday evening. Annexation would have allowed developers to build as many as 166 homes on the 21-acre island, which sits in Key West Harbor just 2100 feet from downtown Key West. Last week, we told you that our tentative vote count was 4-3 in favor of a non-binding referendum to allow the See WISTERIA, page 4 THE ISLAND’S OLDEST INDEPENDENT WEEKLY NEWSPAPER Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page www.kwtn.com RHONDA’S RELIGION PAGE Catholics Rule by Rhonda Linseman In case you’ve forgotten or have been confused and misled since childhood, the Catholic Church reaffirmed this week that they are the boss of religion on Earth. Argument is futile as they took proper procedural measures, sending the following question to the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith (CDF) in Rome: What is the meaning of the affirmation that the Church of Christ subsists in the Catholic Church? The CDF is the office charged with the task of promoting “sound doctrine and defending those points of Christian tradition that seem in danger because of new and unacceptable doctrines,” per the Vatican website. The response by the CDF was to remind us that “Christ established, here on Earth, only one Church and instituted it as a visible and spiritual community…This Church constituted and organized in this world as a society, subsists in the Catholic Church, governed by the successor of Peter and the Bishops in communion with him.” The Nicene Creed, recited regularly at Catholic masses, asserts that Catholics “believe in one, holy, Catholic, and apostolic church.” While Protestants and other bastardized, heretical offshoots of the true Church also recite the Nicene Creed, they mean “catholic” in the lower case sense of the word--”pertaining to the whole Christian body or church.” Catholics mean “Roman Catholic.”And they don’t mean maybe. The CDF report included the clarification of the concept of one true Church, stating that other Christian Orthodox and Protestant denominations “suffer from defects.” If you’re a defective Christian, the Catholic Church does offer hope, noting that your denomination may very well “share elements of sanctification and truth.” It’s not too late. Their God is a forgiving one. As long as you’re not gay, divorced, or practicing safe sex, you’re welcome to apply for membership. Just don’t forget your check book. And as long as you have a penis, you’re encouraged to work your way through the ranks and be promoted to prominent positions of leadership. Pedophiles welcome. No penis? No problem. With females exploring the pesky concept of equality at alarming levels this century, there is no shortage of a need for lay Catholic women to breed and to organize the coffee and donuts in the community room after morning mass. At press time, both the Pope and his secretary, God, were unavailable for comment on this issue. God did whisper, however, that she loves our paper. Allegations of blasphemy and other hate mail can be directed to [email protected] But be sure it’s me you hate, and not yourself or your parents. EDITOR’S NOTE: Rhonda Linseman attended Catholic School for twelve years. She is Associate Editor of Key West the Newspaper. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page NEWS BRIEFS Avael Fails In Bid to Become Manager Of a Village Former Key West City Manager Julio Avael has been rejected in his bid to become the next Key Biscayne Village Manager. He had been one of the final 12 candidates for the job, but when the Village Council culled the list down to the final five Wednesday evening, Avael was not included. Last year, after the Key West City Commission refused to give Avael another multi-year contract, he announced that he planned to retire. But it now appears that he is shopping around for another job. Cop Saves Dog An off-duty Key West Police Department detective and his wife saved the life of a neighbor’s dog last week after someone hit the miniature pinscher and fled the scene of the crime. Det. Matt Haley and his wife Hope were in the front yard of their Northside Drive home when they initially saw the little dog wandering around across the street. “We decided to bring our dog Eloise inside so that the little dog wouldn’t be tempted to run across the street to see her,” Hope Haley explained. Moments after they got Eloise inside their house, the Haley’s heard a collision and a dog cry out. “We ran outside and the dog was lying there bleeding and just screaming,” Hope said. “I scooped her up and went running around the neighborhood, going house to house to see whose dog it was.” “I finally went to the house across the street and the dad came out and said he and his kids had heard the accident, but thought a rooster had been hit,” Hope said. The Haleys returned the injured dog to its owners, who then drove it to the vet. The dog, Jasmine, reportedly survived the accident. Anyone with information about the driver of the vehicle that hit Jasmine and fled the scene on July 3, 2007 is asked to call the Key West Police Department at 809-1111. www.kwtn.com Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page www.kwtn.com Support Of Annexation By Bethel and Kolhage Can Only Be Described As Rabid WISTERIA, from page 1 voters to at least weigh in on the issue. Such an action would have effectively delayed an annexation vote until after the City elections in October. City Commissioners Bill Verge, Mark Rossi, Clayton Lopez and Jose Menendez had all stated publicly that they would vote for a referendum. But we were not at all sure that Menendez would remember what he said publicly. We asked him again this week, but he did not reply to our email. It is likely that both Commissioners Harry Bethel and Danny Kolhage would have been “yes” votes in favor of annexation. Their support of annexation can only be described as rabid. In fact, when the second and final vote was scheduled for May 15, both Bethel and Kolhage pushed hard for a vote, even though Mayor Morgan McPherson and Commissioner Rossi were absent. The vote to table the issue until July 17 was 3-2, with Bethel and Kolhage voting “no”. Five days earlier, Bethel and Kolhage and their wives had been entertained royally at an elegant dinner party on posh Sunset Key, hosted by associates of the potential developers of Wisteria Island. Mayor McPherson had also announced that he would be voting “yes” for annexation. But, he said, trying to keep a straight face, such a vote would not be about development. It would be about “jurisdiction”. “That island is in Key West Harbor,” he said. “The City should determine what happens there, not the County.” But everybody knows that the only reason the owners OLD TOWN Wine & Spirits 1029 Truman Avenue 294-4123 Hours Mon-Sat 9am-10pm • Sun Noon-9pm VODKA Stoli 1.75 30.99 Absolut & Citron 1.75 33.99 Smirnoff & Citrus 1.75 20.99 Three Olives all flavors Lit 25.99 Grey Goose .750 30.99 Ketel 1 1.75 41.99 GIN Gordon 1.75 17.99 Tanqueray 1.75 33.99 CHAMPAGNE & WINE Veuve Clicquot Yellow Label On Sale51.99 Esperto Pinot Grigio .750 12.99 Krug On Sale! .750 135.99 LIQUORS Jagermeister Lit 27.99 RUM Bacardi Lite & Dark 1.75 20.99 Capt. Morgan 1.75 21.99 Mount Gay 1.75 22.99 Malibu 1.75 21.99 Package includes 46oz of Pineapple Juice SCOTCH Johnny Walker Red 1.75 29.99 Dewars White Label 1.75 34.99 WHISKEY Crown royal 1.75 39.99 Crown Royal .750 21.99 Jim Beam 1.75 23.99 Jack Daniel’s 1.75 35.99 TEQUILLA José Quervo Gold 1.75 31.99 Cabo Wabo Silver .750 36.99 and potential developers of the island asked for the City Commission to consider annexing the property in the first place, is that, under County’s stringent development rules, they can only build two homes out there. Got the picture? But McPherson said that, once the City voted to annex the island, he would then call for a referendum to see if the voters were willing to buy the property and preserve it as a park. Of course, had the proponents of annexation, including the Mayor, been successful in lining up a fourth “yes” vote, the value of that island would have immediately soared from less than a half million dollars to millions and millions! We asked the Mayor what we thought was a reasonably intelligent question: Why wouldn’t you delay the vote on annexation and ask the people if they want to try to buy the island cheap— rather than try to annex the island first and then ask the people if they want to try to buy the property for CONTINUED on next page Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page www.kwtn.com Let’s Watch and See Which Members of the Commission Are Willing To Allow the Voters To At Least Weigh In On Annexation WISTERIA, from page 4 millions more? “Oh, no,” he said. “We need to go ahead and annex the island. Then I’ll go to the Bernsteins (the owners of the island). I am confident that they would give us a fair deal.” We don’t make this stuff up. That’s really what he said. The Bernstein family has owned Wisteria Island— created in the 1800s from dredged fill from the shipping channel— for 40 years. Quoted in the daily paper on Wednesday, Roger Bernstein said that he and his partners were “reassessing the situation”. But he pointed out that the island had become an “eyesore”’ intimating that development would solve that problem. Well, gee, Roger, it’s been an eyesore for years and years and years, hasn’t it? If that is really a concern, the solution might be for the owners of the property to invest in some periodic maintenance— like most property owners do. But that is not the solution that the owners and potential developers have been trying to sell around here for the past few months. Their solution to the “eyesore problem” was apparently to try to convince at least four of the City Fathers to vote to make the property part of Key West so it can be superdeveloped and so the owners and developers can make millions and millions and millions of dollars! Come to think of it, if you owned that property, maybe that would make more sense than hiring a lawn service guy with a boat. But, incredibly, McPherson, Bethel and Kolhage had bought into that reasoning! Even though the issue of annexation is temporarily dead, the operational word here is “temporarily”. If you don’t think the developers are going to give up, you haven’t lived in Key West long enough. On Tuesday night’s Commission agenda will be a proposal for a non-binding referendum, sponsored by Commissioner Verge. The referendum question would ask if the voters of Key West are in favor of annexing Wisteria Island to allow it to be developed. Surely there will be at least four votes to pass this ordinance. This is important for several reasons: • The people will be given the opportunity to weigh in on the issue. Such a referendum would be non-binding, but it would at least give the City Commission a sense of what the people are thinking. • This would give both sides an opportunity to spell out the advantages and disadvantages of annexation. This has been the primary reason we here at Key West The Newspaper have opposed what appeared to be a rush to annex the island. Nobody— including McPherson, Bethel and Kolhage, who were ready to happily vote “yes”— have put forth any real advantages of annexation for the taxpayers of Key West. Our opposition has not been particularly related to development. We don’t think Sunset Key is a “bad” development. We are being told that Wisteria Island would be developed as sort of a Sunset Key Light. But annexation was not required for the development of Sunset Key. • Annexation would be come an issue in the upcoming city elections. The Mayor’s chair and three other seats on the City Commission are up for grabs. Candidates will be forced to take a stand on annexation— and their candidacies can succeed or fail based on the position they take. Recall in the last City election in 2005, incumbent Commissioner Tom Oosterhoudt had supported the controversial Watermark project. His challenger, Bill Verge, had opposed the project as a member of the Planning Board. Most electionwatchers here agree that the Watermark controversy was a key factor that resulted in Oosterhoudt being tossed out of office by the voters. Let’s watch together Tuesday evening to see which members of the City Commission are willing to vote “yes” to allow the people to at least have a nonbinding say about the potential annexation and development of Wisteria Island. And let’s see who argues that, since the vote on annexation has been pulled off the agenda, a referendum “is no longer necessary”. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page www.kwtn.com 21-Year-Old Conch On the Edge Of the Big Time In the Fashion World FASHION, from page 1 jackets, blazers, beanies, pants, tops, T-shirts, and a new line of tunics. This week I had a chance to visit her in her family’s Newton Street home. She’d literally just walked in the door from a business trip to New York City, but since my dad was the most memorable first mate to ever work on her dad’s boat, she squeezed me in. Or perhaps she squeezed me in because I have goofy pictures of her from childhood and I’m not afraid to publish them. At 21, many people her age don’t understand Jennifer’s drive and vision, but having known Jennifer since she was a toddler, I can attest that she has always been different—the amazing kind of different. She can’t be squelched. And she has an enviable ability to stay focused on her goals and to see naysayers for what they really are. “When I say I’ll have it CONTINUED on page 7 JENNIFER POTTER, wearing one of her own designer frocks Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page www.kwtn.com Rapper Wore Local Designer’s Fashions On Letterman Show FROM page 6 done at noon, it will be done at 11:30, and you’ll love it. I expect the same of everybody I work with” she said unapologetically about the attitude and work ethic it takes to make it in the competitive fashion industry. “You’ve got to be tough. Nobody is taken seriously at first, but you can’t be afraid to network and you most certainly can’t take rejection personally.” Early on, she and her previous partner dedicated as much time designing, sewing, and painting as they did attempting to market their name and work. They worked tirelessly to promote Joven, including plenty of cold calling and spending time and money at concerts, making their way back stage to make contacts and to give their designs away to potential customers. But now, entertainers are seeking Jennifer out. In fact, during my visit she took a phone call from a hip-hop artist “Donnis” who wanted three custom jackets for his upcoming Japanese tour. Jennifer also recently traveled as a stylist with the Late Night Special Tour, which featured big names in the industry including “Pretty Ricky” and “Meat n Bones.” She has designed for rapper “Dynamic” and will be styling him for his next video shoot, scheduled for August. She has designed clothes for rap giants “2XL” of Tommy Boy Records, one of whom wore her garb on a recent David Letterman appearance. One of her custom hoodies even made it into hip-hop entertainment industry magazine, The Source, worn by well-known rapper, “Laze.” While she feels growing up in Key West had its challenges, including an often laid back, casual attitude that didn’t always fit with hers, she is grateful for the experience, in part because the environment offered few distractions. She also liked the idea of earning a degree at FKCC and being able to work but stay home with no concerns about paying rent and other worries associated with going away to school. She attributes some of her ability to remain confident to one of her local mentors, Sharon Asche, who formerly owned “Benenu,” a clothing boutique here. Ms. Asche was one of the first to sell Joven Fashions in her store. “She took time with me and really cared about helping me learn how to make it work” Jennifer said fondly. “She helped me believe I have a talent and a gift.” Despite her loyalty to Key West, she makes no bones about her commitment to go wherever she needs to go and to do whatever it takes. “I’ll likely have to move back to New York” she predicts. “Of course I’d like to be a top designer with my own showroom and my own well-established line” she said, adding that ultimately, making a living as a designer— even for big label company— would be more than most people in the industry can hope to achieve. No matter what happens, she feels she’ll never regret making a go of it on her own. “It’s an invaluable experience and I’ve learned things that nobody can ever take away from me.” This kid is really something. View her current designs at www.jovenfashions.com Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page www.kwtn.com EVENTS Hemingway Days Able Body Fitness Center is proudly registered with the State of Florida as a Health Studio. Registration No. HS4729 HEMINGWAY LOOK-ALIKE CONTEST Sloppy Joe’s is preparing to host its 27th Annual Hemingway Look-Alike contest and expects close to 150 bearded men to join in this year’s contest. Many contestants will bring with them convention-style cheering sections with signs and banners to help encourage the judges to vote for their Papa. The contest will begin on Thursday, July 19th with the first preliminary round at 6:30pm and the second preliminary round on Friday, July 20th at 6:30pm. Each night approximately 12 finalists will be selected to compete in Saturday’s final round at 7:00pm. Contestants entered in Sloppy Joe’s Look-Alike contest resemble an older Hemingway and are a hearty bunch that compete wearing garb such as safari outfits, wool fishermen sweaters and boxing attire. An honor Papa winners receive is to return as a judge for future contests. This year 18 former Hemingway Look-Alike winners will join us in Key West to select Papa 2007. In addition to the contest Photos with Papa will be Saturday, July 21st at Noon on Greene Street followed by the Running of the Bulls at 1:00pm. The four day event ends on Sunday, July 22nd with Arm Wrestling contest on stage at 12:30pm. Info: 296-2388, Ext. 121. VOICES, PLACES, INSPIRATIONS “Voices, Places, Inspirations,” an evening of literary readings and presentations, will be held at Wyland Galleries’ 623 Duval Street location Wednesday, July 18, beginning at 8 p.m. One of the highlights of Key West’s Hemingway Days celebration, the event showcases the work of talented contemporary authors and talespinners. This year ’s presenters will once again include Tom Corcoran, whose Alex Rutledge mystery series has gained wide acclaim for its authentic depiction of Key West. Also a photographer like his protagonist Rutledge, Corcoran has shot book covers for such well-known writers as Tom McGuane, Les Standiford, and J.W. Hall — as well as seven album covers for his longtime friend Jimmy Buffett. Corcoran’s most recent work is a departure from the Rutledge series – “Jimmy Buffett: The Key West Years,” which features his photography as well as his memories of Key West’s not-too-distant funky past. Brian Gordon Sinclair, whose one-man “Hemingway on Stage” theatrical presentations have been a popular annual feature of Hemingway Days, will also return to “Voices, Places, Inspirations.” Sinclair has submerged himself in Hemingway through years of research into the life and work of the literary legend, and his plays contain unforgettable insights into Hemingway’s life. Joining them will be Key West writer/photographer Jeffrey Cardenas, who is also an adventurer, fishing guide and expert angler. Cardenas is best known for “Sea Level” and “Marquesa: A Time & Place with Fish,” his books describing the natural wonders of the area as well as the art of fishing. In JEFFREY CARDENAS addition, he has written widely acclaimed articles for “The New York Times” and “Outside.” Also sharing the stage will be master storyteller Capt. Finbar Gittelman, whose quirky humor has entertained “Voices, Places, Inspirations” audiences in prior years. His dramatic personal experiences, and his unique flair for their telling, make him a favorite presenter. The evening would not be complete without a reading by author Lorian Hemingway, Ernest’s granddaughter and a Pulitzer Prize nominee for her “Walk on Water.” Lorian is currently working on a booklength exploration of Key West, its history and allure. “Voices, Places, Inspirations” will run through 10 p.m. July 18 at Wyland Galleries’ 623 Duval Street location, where fine art by Wyland and other leading contemporary artists is displayed. Admission to the event is free, thanks to support from Wyland Galleries, Casa Antigua, Hidden Beach, Lighthouse Court, GEICO, and Realty Mortgage. Parking is available in the city lot behind the gallery. For more information, call (305) 294-0320 or visit www. shortstorycompetition.com. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page www.kwtn.com Hemingway On Stage Spa Manicures & Pedicures CISSY @ HEADLINES Acrylics, Pink & Whites 1075 Duval Street • 305-296-6373 [email protected] HEMINGWAY’S HAVANA— Noted actor Brian Gordon Sinclair will present his one-man show, Hemingway’s Havana”, Tuesday night, July 17, at the Tropic Cinema at 7pm. One perfromance only. Tickets: $12 for adults and $5 for children. Proceeds benefit the Key West Art & Historical Society. Info: 295-6616. Avael Considered Putting Fire Chief In Charge of Code Enforcement HEARING, from page 1 City Manager Avael had tried to “fix” the violation for Bethel. KWTN has also obtained copies of an exchange of emails that shows that, in October 2006, Avael was considering putting Code Enforcement under the supervision of Key West Fire Chief David Fraga. And he was keeping Commissioner Bethel informed. Apparently, following the October 3 Commission meeting, Avael sent Fraga and email asking him if he would be willing to take over Code Enforcement. Early the following morning, October 4, Avael sent Fraga a followup email asking him if he had received his previous email and told him, “I am vacillating on whether to keep them (Code Enforcement) under (the Building Department) or moving them on a temporary basis to your department.” That email was copied to Damarys Garcia, Bethel’s secretary at the Florida Keys Aqueduct Authority. That is how Bethel gets his emails. Later in the morning, Fraga responded to Avael, turning down the offer to take over Code Enforcement, but offering to train Code Enforcement employees. The next morning, Avael sent an email to Bethel, through Ms. Garcia, giving him a progress report on his email exchange with Fraga. During the hearing Tuesday, Young also alleged that Avael had ordered Code Enforcement to ignore building and sign violations at the new Rum Barrel Restaurant in early 2006, because the owner of the restaurant, Pat Croce, and Avael are good friends. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 10 www.kwtn.com opinion hal o'boyle Does the City Commission Sometimes Vote Based On “MadeUp” Information? The Income Tax Fraud In a Nutshell by Dennis Reeves Cooper The Mayor and City Commissioners often get quite defensive when newspaper columnists suggest that they do dumb things. But, sometimes, they do do dumb things. Case in point: At the last City Commission meeting on July 3, our City Fathers voted 5-1 to exempt the Hemingway Home & Museum from a City law that prohibits more than four domestic animals per household in Key West. Well, first of all, the Hemingway Home is not a household. It’s a for-profit business. It is true that a dozen or more of the famous six-toed cats do wander freely around the property. But, as far as we know, there has never been any effort made to enforce the four-animal rule at the Hemingway Home. So the City Commission’s vote to exempt the attraction from the City law seems meaningless. Apparently, however, the Mayor and some of the Commissioners wanted to show some support for the owners of the Hemingway Home, who are in a battle with the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA), which claims that the museum is “exhibiting” animals without the proper license. The USDA has also expressed some concern over the health and safety of the cats. In a press statement issued last year, a USDA spokesperson said, “The Hemingway cats have suffered and continue to suffer injury and death as a result of the Hemingway Home’s continuing failure to maintain facilities capable of containing the cats securely, protecting them from injury and restricting other animals from entering the Hemingway Home property.” The statement went on to say that, in one year alone, three of the cats had been killed by cars. The ordinance recently passed by the City Commission stated, “The family of polydactyl cats that live on the property are an integral part of the history and See CATS, page 24 ON THE SONNY SIDE Seven, Seven, Seven by Charles “Sonny” McCoy Last week we noticed on the calendar that it was the seventh day of the seventh month of the seventh year of the century. Seven, Seven, Seven is an easy date to remember and sure enough, there was a rush for couples to marry on that day. For husbands who are prone to forget anniversaries, birthdays, and the like it should be an additional crutch for those guys. Last year it was six, six, six that had people looking at the significance of this trio and sure enough they would find witchery and sorcery in its incantation. But, of course, here on this sophisticated Island, all it is, is a cab company. Even so, its’ use in spells and rituals has been passed down through the ages and can still be used to cause some people to pause and reflect on stories they have heard. Seven, on the other hand, has some other connotations; especially if you’re rolling the dice. The significance of ‘Seven come eleven’ has a meaning only to the ‘crapshooter’. Seven card stud and other games of chance, depend on Seven. Probably, the use of Seven in dividing up the week is the most profound and yet the most mundane use of the number seven. The Biblical use of the Seven days of creation divided and defined how Man was to live his life in an orderly manner, preserving the last day of that Seven to honor his Maker and to rest by watching professional football. The seven day week was mandated in the Bible and has proven to be such a logical division of Mankinds Time that it has had universal acceptance for these many centuries. The Seven Wonders of the World told of the great wonders of the ancient World. Six of those wonders have disappeared, such as the Egyptian Library that sank into the Mediterranean at the entrance of the River Nile. Only the Pyramids of Egypt remain of those Seven Great Wonders. If you’re following the news, then you have heard that the people of the world were allowed to vote on what was their perception of what is now the Seven Wonders of the World, and vote they did. We have sailed the Seven Seas and traversed the Seven Continents and yet the Sevens keep coming. We have pondered the OPINION? significance of just one WHAT’S YOUR Seven and we have even ruminated Send us a Letter on two Sevens. But now being confronted with purposive thinking To the Editor. Email: of what are the abject ramifications of having to deal [email protected] with three Sevens; we thought we could take comfort in 305-292-1882 the realization that this particular Fax Seven, Seven, Seven would not be repeated in this But, lo PO Box 567, KW FLCentury. 33041 and behold, in a mere Seven decades, the calendar will show Seven, Seven, Seven, Seven. Sonny McCoy is a Monroe County Commissioner and a former five-term Mayor of Key West. by Hal O’Boyle Recent correspondence from my favorite junk yard dogs has prompted me to share with you, my loyal readers, and with those who drop by occasionally to scoff, point and laugh, a simple, but accurate summary of an almost unimaginably vast fraud, the income tax. To that end, here is another of O’Boyle’s boldly oversimplified explanations of really important stuff (OBOERIS). At the end of each tax year businesses and people who have paid other businesses and people certain minimum amounts during the year have been convinced that they are obliged to report what they paid and to whom. These reports are called “information returns.” The most common are W-2s, 1099s, and K-1s, though there are a few others. Copies go to the IRS and to the recipients of the payments. These documents allege, in a legal sense, that the payments constitute “income” for purposes of the “income tax.” Few payers have any idea of whether what they allege on those forms is true, but everyone assumes it is. When the payee receives his notice, he is actually being informed that testimony has been made to the government concerning the nature of the paySee O'BOYLE, page 24 Key West West Key T H E N E W S P A P E R Key West The Newspaper is published every Friday, all year 'round, 52 weeks a year. Free distribution weekly: 9,500 News tips and letters to the editor are welcome. Phone: (305) 292-2108. Fax: (305) 292-1882. Editorial and advertising office: 422 Fleming Street Mail: P.O. Box 567, Key West FL 33041 E-mail: [email protected] Subscriptions: $35 for six months Editor/Publisher Dennis Reeves Cooper, Ph.D. Associate Editor Rhonda Linseman Entertainment Valerie Ridenour Photography Richard Watherwax Art Director Art Winstanley Advertising Byron Gronvold Contributors Michael Barnes, Bob Smith, Hal O’Boyle, Sonny McCoy, Barbara Bowers, Meryl Berman, Harry Skevington Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 11 www.kwtn.com ENTERTAINMENT • EATING & DRINKING • NIGHTLIFE • ATTRACTIONS • EVENTS • ARTS • SHOPPING • MAP Bubba System Has Gigs At Schooner Wharf, Sloppy Joe’s Danny Morris Band at the Green Parrot All Weekend KEY WEST’S HOMETOWN BAND, THE BUBBA SYSTEM, will be at the Schooner Wharf Bar tonight and tomorrow night, Friday and Saturday, July 13-14, 7 ‘til midnight. The band will be at Sloppy Joe’s Sunday afternoon, starting at 5:30. Live Music On the Island! Complete Listings & Info Pages 11-20 THE POPULAR DANNY MORRIS BAND will be back at the Parrot tonight and tomorrow night, Friday and Saturday, July 13-14, starting at 10 both nights. But, as they say on TV, that’s not all! Special 5:30 “sound checks” are scheduled Friday, Saturday and Sunday afternoons! Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 12 www.kwtn.com more more entertainment entertainment Dave Aaron Band At Finnegan’s THE DAVE AARON BAND will be at Finnegan’s Wake tinight, Friday, July 13. DAVE VIZARD is back in the house tomorrow night, Saturday. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 13 www.kwtn.com more entertainment Mel Fisher Day Features Homemade Bikini Contest The golden dream of treasure hunter Mel Fisher is alive and well and still celebrated at the Schooner Wharf Bar every July. The Kick-Off Party for Mel Fisher Days will take place next Thursday, July 19, starting at 6pm. Come celebrate the day 22 years ago when Mel’s crews found $400 million in shipwrecked gold, silver and emeralds that had been sitting on the ocean floor for more than 300 years. The events combine stories of the hunt for the Spanish galleon Atocha, memories of the man, and a few of his favorite activities. Throughout the night, more than $8,000 in Spanish Treasure Coins will be given away. Anyone who remembers Mel remembers his fondness for beautiful women in minimal clothing. So the Home- made Bikini Contest will be held in honor of the man who would most appreciate it. The women will compete for a grand prize of an authentic silver coin from the Atocha valued at $2400.. Later, test your Mel Fisher knowledge with a game of trivia. Win a prize if you answer 20 questions! Then it’s a game of “To Tell the Mel Truth.” The winner takes home another Atocha coin!!! There will be raffles to benefit the Michael Abt Have a Heart Fund; the goal is to supply Automatic External Defibulaters (AED) to schools in Florida, with over $5,000 in prizes -authentic treasure coins from the Atocha, Margarita and 1715 fleets, and MORE!!! For $15, take a chance to “have your cake and eat it too!” in the Mel Fisher tradi- tion. Treasure is buried in the winning slice; you could sink your teeth into a Grade 2 Atocha coin worth $1800! As Mel always said of Schooner Wharf Bar, “This place is a Treasure,” so come enjoy the evening at Mel’s favorite watering hole with the Fisher family, and treasure your own memories. Ladies who want to participate in the bikini contest should call 296-6534. OILY’S AUTO REPAIR MIKE YOUNG, CERTIFIED ASE TECHNICIAN 5669 5th AVE, STOCK ISLAND• 296-6656 Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 14 www.kwtn.com Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 15 www.kwtn.com Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 16 www.kwtn.com what’s hot John Solinski & Reddawg by Valerie Ridenour John Solinski knocked me out the first time I heard him. It was in the same venue, Irish Kevin’s, but in a different musical space. It was a quiet time of day. John played ballads and rockers and was wonderful, especially with his use of a relatively new piece of equipment at that time, a looper. This machine allows the player to play through a song, push a button that plays it back, and play over it with the same or another instrument. John could play bass or lead over his original guitar track. Unlike a sequencer, this is a totally live performance. John is the best I ever heard using one. One other performer was using a looper at the time, Jeff Clark. This performance was totally different. Duval Street was relatively quiet, except for Irish Kevin’s. John was playing and was inciting the crowd (and there was a crowd) almost to riot. There was a line of folks outside. Every few minutes John would exhort the inside crowd to yell in unison 1-2-3, “come on in!” They did. It was an atmosphere of crazed fans having a fabulous time. John had a partner, his brother David, also known as Reddawg. They did ‘an Irish tune’, “What Do You Do With a Drunken Sailor” complete with shot breaks. Next came Charlie Daniels’ “The Devil Went Down To Georgia”. Reddawg plays a strange instrument that appears to be a drum you you play by tapping buttons with your fingers. This sound enhances John’s excellent guitar. Both Solinski brothers have marvelous voices, and consequently, great harmony. Reddawg calls AA on a cell phone, claims they don’t answer. Next we heard “I Just Called To Say I LoveYou”. John says, “sing along”, and they do! The boys let go with an occasional “Ye haw”. Now we hear the looper as John sings “On the Dark Side” with magical guitar. Ask! Now Reddawg sings “Folsom Prison Blues” followed by “Ring Of Fire” with dirty words. Excellent! John is sponsored by Jagermeister. He indulges in one. John does “Shaking All Night Long”, “Sweet Home Alabama” and “Johnny Be Good” in a Southern rock tribute. The brothers Solinski don’t forget David Allen Coe. They do “The Perfect Country Song”. Reddawg borrows a phone a guy is talking on and says,”we’re having fun at the gay bar!”. Now it’s “red neck songs”, “Rawhide” and “Hungry Like the Wolf” (?). The huge audience is having a ball. So am I! Go hear John Solinski and Reddawg. Tell them I sent you. Stay cool. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 17 www.kwtn.com RIDENOUR REPORT by Valerie Ridenour We’ve recovered from the holiday (barely). When I heard John Solinski play “The Devil Went Down To Georgia” I was reminded what a great guy Charlie Daniels is. When he won the grammy he brought Buddy Spicher on stage who had played on the record and had him play that fantastic fiddle part. Buddy is a Nashville session musician, and probably the best in the world on his instruments. Linda Ronstadt’s biggest his is a song called “Long, Long Time”. There were only three musicians in the studio when she recorded it, David Briggs, Norbert Putnam, and Buddy. He played violin, then added a viola part. They put the song down in one take. Linda wasn’t getting any good songs from Nashville. She brought that one from California. You can believe she had her choice after it zoomed to number one! Buddy has many jazz albums out. He and Lenny Breau spent much of their childhood sitting on a West Virginia mountain playing jazz. Lenny was considered world class. Chet Atkins told me he’d never see his peer in his lifetime. He didn’t. Buddy Spicher is also that good. We lost a national treasure in the passing of saxophone giant Boots Randolf. Boots created Nashville’s Printers Alley with its famous jazz clubs. One of my biggest thrills was when Diane Sherrill asked me to come C. W. COLT down and sing with her. I was leaving on the road and didn’t get to. It happened at a dinner party at Mae Axton’s fabulous house. Hoyt, Diane, and most of Hoyt’s band were there along with session musicians. The late, great guitarist Hank Garland played there. Stan Kenton’s band came in and announced they were there to sit in (translate that: show Nashville how jazz should be played). So Hank did what he was famous for. He played himself into a hole and played himself out of it. At the end of the set Kenton’s folks left saying, “Thank you, Mr. Garland, sir!” Hank was asked to play the Newport Jazz Festival. They weren’t. Did you watch the concert to save our environment? Madonna was incredible as only she can be. Roger and Pink Floyd brought back fantastic memories, and Sting proved once again that he is the very best. Our own C.W. Colt played a festival in Austin to honor Mickey Newberry. The last time I saw Mickey was at the Green Parrot at a songwriter’s festival. We laughed about his living in an old Cadillac behind Acuff Rose Publishing Company until he got established. Ah, Nashville! C.W. is coming back to town next week. Go see him! He’s in that class. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 18 www.kwtn.com NOW PLAYING PLEASE NOTE: Entertainment schedules are always subject to last-minute changes and, sometimes, club schedules are not available at press time. TBA stands for To Be Announced. NAPT stands for Not Available At Press Time. Band times are noted before the names of the bands in each listing. Please alert Valerie Ridenour to errors and/or schedule changes. 872-1561. [email protected] NOTE: Schedules are subject to change without notice. To be sure the band of your choice is playing, you may want to call the venue before you go. AQUA: SAT, 3:30 – 6: 30, Mike Emerson Trio * TUES – MON, the Aquanettes BEAR BOTTOM BEACH CLUB: FRI & SAT, 6 – 10, Randy Mac; 10 – 2, Matt Avery * MON & TUES, 5 – 9, Acoustic Johnson * WED, 5 – 9, Taz; 9 – 1, Matt Avery BLUE HEAVEN: FRI, Chris Case * SAT, Din Allen * SUN, brunch, Din Allen * WED, Mark Larkins B.O.’s FISH WAGON: FRI, 6pm, Barry Cuda & the Sharks BOONDOCKS: FRI, Larry Baeder Group; SAT, 40 ft Sharpie* SUN, Gillis & Gordy * MON, Barry Cuda & Friends * THURS, Tropical Dreams BOTTLECAP: WED, Beef Chili & the Con Carnes THE BULL: FRI, 1 – 5, Yankee Jack; 6 – 10, Jeanie Falcone; 10 – 2, Moose & the Bulletproof Blues Band * SAT, 1 – 5, Yankee Jack; 6 – 10, Jeanie Falcone; 10 – 2, 40ft. Sharpie * SUN, 1 – 5, Yankee Jack; 6 – 9, Elvis; 9 – 1, 40 ft, Sharpie _ MON, 1 – 5, Yankee Jack; 8 – 12, Baby T * TUES, 1 – 5, Yankee Jack; 8 – 12, Moose * WED, 1 – 5, Jeanie Falcone; 8 – 12, Philo * THURS,; 1 – 5, Yankee Jack; 6 – 10,Dawn Wilder; 10 – 2, Jeanie Falcone CAPTAIN TONY’S: FRI & SAT, noon, Rob Sweet; 4:30 Gary Hempsey; 9 – 2, Carl Peachy Band * SUN, noon, Bed Taddiken; 4:30, Tim Bender; 8:30 – 12:30, Gary Hempsey * MON, noon, Liz O’Connor; 4:30, Rob Sweet; 8:30 – 12:30, Carl Peachy Band * TUES, noon, Rob Sweet; 4:30, Gary Hempsey; 8:30 – 12:30 Gary Hempsey * WED, noon, Ben Taddiken; 4:30, Tim Bender; 8:30 – 12:30, Carl Peachy Band * THURS, noon Liz O’Connor; 4:39, Gary Hempsey; 8:30 – 12:30, Carl Peachy Band CHEESEBURGER: FRI, Nick Norman; SAT, Hershel Lester; * SUN, Alphonse * TUES, Jim Wist * THURS, Jim Wist; Rob & Tom CONCH REPUBLIC SEAFOOD RESTAURANT: FRI, 2 – 6, Joel Nelson; 7 – 11, Black & Skabuddah * SAT, 2 – 6, Joel Nelson; 7 – 11, Zack Seemiller * SUN, 6 – 10, Melvin Newton * MON, 6 -10, Zack Seemiller * TUES, 6 – 10, Melvin Newton * WED, Din Allen * THURS, 6 – 10, Black & Skabuddah COWBOY BILL’S; FRI & SAT, Mikey Todd Band * WED & THURS, Skarekrow DANTE’S: FRI, 4 - 8, Yvon Agbo * SAT, 1:30 – 5:30, Captain Blues Band * SUN, 1:30 – 5:30, Monks Of Funk DURTY HARRY’S: FRI & SAT, 8”30, Durty Rita * MON & TUES, Duo * WED & THURS, Durty Rita FINNEGAN’S WAKE: FRI, Dave Aaron Band * SAT, Dave Vizard THURS, Finbar B. Dingle GARDEN OF EDEN: FRI – THURS, DJ’s Timber & Lars GRAND KEY: FRI & SAT, Bobby Pazo * Weekends on the deck, Jim Wist GREEN PARROT: FRI, 5pm sound check, Robert Albury; FRI & SAT, 10 – 2, Hep Cat Boo Daddies. 5:30pm sound check Sat & Sun GUY HARVEY’S ISLAND GRILL: FRI & SAT, Steffan * SUN, TUES, WED, & THURS, Chris Case HALF SHELL RAW BAR: FRI, 5 - 7, Caffeine Carl HOG’S BREATH: FRI & SAT, noon - 4, Kenny & Cuda Show; 5 – 9, Clint Bullard; 10 – 2, Kevin Montgomery Band * SUN, noon - 4, TBA; 5 – 9, Clint Bullard; 10 – 2, Chris Clifton Band * MON & TUES, noon – 4, Corey Heydon; 5 – 9, Bruce & Red; 10 – 2, The Full Sail Band * WED & THURS, noon – 4, Joel Nelson; 5 – 9, Bruce & Red; 10 – 2, The Full Sail Band HOGFISH: FRI, Terry Cassidy * SAT, Moose * THURS, Shaggy IRISH KEVIN’S: FRI, 11 – 3, Dan Ligouri; 3 – 7, John Solinski; 7 – 11, Matt Quinton; 11- close N.Y. CONTINUED on next page Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 19 www.kwtn.com NOW PLAYING FROM previous page Pauly * SAT,11 – 3, George Victory; 3 – 7, Nick Norman; 7 – 11, N.Y. Pauly; 11 – close, Matt Quenton * SUN, 12 – 3;30, Zack Seemiller; 3:30 – 7, Nick Norman; 7 – 10:30, NY Pauly 10:30 – close, John Solinski * MON, 10:30 – 2:30, TBA; 2:30 – 6:30, Nick Norman; 6:30 – 10:30, John Solinski; 10:30 – Close Matt Quenton * TUES, 10:30 – 2:30, Reddawg; 2:30 – 6:30, Nick Norman; 6:30 – 10:30, N.Y. Pauly; 10 -30 – close, Matt Quenton WED, 10:30 – 2:30, Reddawg;2:30 – 6:30, Nick Norman; 8:30 – 10:30, Matt Quenton; 10:30 – close, N.Y. Pauly * THURS, NAPT ISLAND DOG: SUN, FRI & SAT, George Victory; Sun, afternoon, George Victory * THURS, TBA LA TE DA: Cabaret, FRI & SAT, Broadway Three Ways Piano Bar, FRI – SUN, Debra & Patrick * MON, Bobby Nesbitt * TUES – WED, Black & Skabuddah * THURS, Debra & Patrick LAZY GECKO: FRI, Parachute Adams * SAT, John & RED * TUES, Parachute Adams * WED, Zack Seemiller * THURS, Nick Norman MARGARITAVILLE: FRI -SUN, Caffeine Carl * MON, Dave Aaron Band; TUES – THURS, Kabang REDFISH/BLUEFISH : SAT, Brian Roberts * THURS, Dave Aaron RICK’S: FRI, 11 – 3, Pete Frazier; 4 – 8, Ben Taddiken; 8 – 12, Uncle Bob * SAT, 12 – 4, Alphonse; 4 – 8, Ben Taddiken; 8 – 12,Uncle Bob * SUN, 8 – 12, Ben Taddiken * MON, 11am, Pete Frazier; 8 – 12, Ben Taddiken * TUES, 11 - 4, C.W. Colt; 4 – 8, Uncle Bob * WED, 8 - 12, Uncle Bob * THURS, noon, C.W. Colt; 8 – 12, Uncle Bob, Every night, Karoake RUM BARREL: FRI, 4pm, Zack Seemiller; 8 – 12, Jeff Shenandoah * SAT 4pm, Jimmy Padget; 8 – 12, Larry Baeder * SUN, 4pm, Vinnie Mustache; 8 – 12, Corey Heydon * TUES, 8 – 12, Raven & Bubba * WED, 7 – 11, Moose * THURS, 4pm, Yvon Agbo; 8 – 12, Larry Baeder SCHOONER WHARF: FRI, noon – 5, Michael McCloud & friends; 7 – 11, Bubba System; 9 – 1, Magic of Frank Everhart * SAT, noon – 5, Michael McCloud & friends; 7 – 11, Bubba System; 9 – 1, the magic of Frank Everhart * SUN, noon – 5, Michael McCloud & friends; 7 – 11, Calypso Latin Party; 9 – 1, magic of Frank Everhart * MON, noon – 5, Michael McCloud & Friends; 7 - 11, Caffeine & Pepper; 9 – 1, Magic of Frank Everhart * TUES, noon – 5, Raven & Bubba;7 – 11, Corey Heydon, 9 – 1, magic of Frank Everhart * WED, Michael McCloud & friends; 7- 11, C.W.Colt; 9 – 1, magic of Frank Everhart * THURS, noon – 5, Michael McCloud & friends, 7 – 11, Unpaid Bartabs, 9 – 1, magic of Frank Everhart SLOPPY JOE’S: FRI 12 – 4, Black & Skabuddah; 5:30 – 8:30, CONTINUED on next page Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 20 www.kwtn.com Behind Bars RICHARD WATHERWAX BARTENDER OF THE WEEK TERRY is a bartender at the Conch Republic Seafood Company. His specialty drink is a Mango Mojito. Tell us who your favorite drink server is. PO Box 567, KW 33041. Fax 292-2108. Email: kwtnblue@bellsouth. net now playing Fremont John Trio; 10 – 2, Poptart Monkeys * SAT, 12 – 4, ZackSeemiller; 5:30 – 9:30 Fremont John Trio; 10 -2, Poptart Monkeys * SUN, 12 – 4, Barry Cuda; 5:30 – 9:30, Bubba System; 10 – 2, Pop Tart Monkeys * MON, 12 – 4, Barry Cuda; 5:30 – 9:30, Black & Skabuddah 10 – 2, Candiflyp * TUES, noon – 4, Brian Roberts; 5:30 – 9:30, Black & Skabuddah; 10 – 2 Candiflyp * WED, 12 – 4, Terry Cassidy; 5:30 – 9:30, Chris Case; 10 – 2, Candiflyp * THURS, 12 – 4, Terry Cassidy; 5:30 – 9:30 Zack Seemiller Band; 10 – 2, Candiflyp SUGARLOAF LODGE: TIKI: SAT, Terry Cassidy SUNSET PIER: FRI, 1 – 5, George Victory;6:30 – 8:30, Robert Albury; 8:30 – 10, Raven Cooper * SAT, 1 – 4, Caribe; 6:30 – 10:30, Raven Cooper * SUN, 1 – 5, George Victory; 6:30 – 8”30, Robert Albury; 8:30 – 10, Raven Cooper * MON, 1 – 5, George Victory; 6:30 – 8:30, Joel Nelson * TUES, 6:30 – 8:30, Rolando Rojas; 8:30 – 10:39, Joel Nelson * WED, 1 – 5, George Victory; 6:30 – 8:30, Robert Albury; 8”30 – 10:30, Raven Cooper * THURS, Robin & James TURTLE KRAALS: SAT, Dave Aaron Band * THURS, 5 – 7, Brian Paul VIRGILIO’S: FRI & SAT, George Victory * MON, Marty’s Party * TUES, Skipper’s League Of Crafty Musicians, The Uh Oh Trio, Gordy Michael, Mike Emerson, & Skippo; WED, George Victory * THURS, Caribe WILLIE T’S: TBA Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 21 www.kwtn.com Local Favorites film What’s On at the Tropic? Opens Friday. One Week 3min. Showtimes (in The George): Daily at (4:15) and JINDABYNE 8:30pm, except no 4:15pm show Laura Linney (Mystic on Friday, July 13 River, Squid and Whale, Kin* * * sey) and Gabriel Byrne (WahThird Socko Week ! Wah, Vanity Fair) team up SICKO with the Australian director It’s rare that a movie is Ray Lawrence (Lantana) and front page news, but Michael a script based on a Raymond Moore has that way about Carver short story. “The result him. As the 2008 political seais a mature and challenging son looms ahead, he’s made motion picture, and something a movie that one has to see, if that will stick with viewers af- only to share in the discussion. ter the screen has gone dark.” You don’t have to love Michael (Reel Views) While on a fishing Moore to like SICKO, the movie trip, Stewart (Byrne) and his that has drawn new attention friends find a girl’s body in to this country’s broken health the river. Instead of returning care system. “SICKO is socko” home to report the discovery, says Time Magazine. Sticking they spend the day fishing. to his tried-and-true one-man When the men finally return approach, Moore sheds light home and report the finding, no on the complicated medical one can understand how they affairs of individuals and local could have continued fishing communities alike, giving us “a with the dead girl right there in movie of robust mind and heart. the water. Stewart’s wife Claire You’ll laugh till it hurts,” says (Linney) is the last to know and Rolling Stone. “Sicko is the least as details filter out, she becomes controversial and most broadly deeply unnerved. As public appealing of Mr. Moore’s movopinion builds against the men, ies. (It is also, perhaps improbClaire’s marriage is taken to the ably, the funniest and the most brink. Based on the Carver short tightly edited.),” agrees the story “So Much Water, So Close New York Times to Home,” that was previously “Moore’s most assured, featured in Robert Altman’s least antagonistic and potenShort Cuts. tially most important film” New Nominated for nine Aus- York Daily News tralian Film Institute awards, “Highly entertaining and including Best Picture informative.” USA Today “A coiled and enigmatic “Sicko is Moore’s best psychodrama that cements film: a documentary that mixes Australian director Ray Law- outrage, hope, and gonzo stunts rence’s standing as a fine, if in the right proportions; that not prolific, filmmaker.” Hol- poses profound questions about lywood Reporter the connection between health “The movie is beautifully care and work.” New York shot, and succeeds in being Magazine deeply disturbing and mysRated PG-13 Runtime: 1hr terious, with richly achieved 53min. Showtimes (in Carper): nuances of characterisation. I Daily at (3:00), 5:30 and 8:00pm, have seen it two or three times except (2:00), 4:30 and 8:30 on now, and each time it gets bet- Tuesday, July 17 ter.” Guardian (UK) * * * “a quirky dark comedy Held over! that is all-too-Altmanesque.” PARIS JE T’AIME Boston Phoenix A who’s who of celebrated Rated R. Runtime 2hr filmmakers from around the only. world come together to show Paris in a way never before imagined. Through a kaleidoscope of stories about joy, separation, unexpected strange encounters and of course— love—their films capture both the reality of contemporary Paris as well as the enchantment one feels as a visitor. It’s an omnibus celebrating the joys and sorrows of love and Paris, organized by neighborhood. Cast includes Natalie Portman, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Elijah Wood, Nick Nolte, Bob Hoskins, Juliette Binoche, Emily Mortimer, Rufus Sewell, Gena Rowlands, Miranda Richardson and Steve Buscemi. Directors include the Coen Brothers, Gus Van Sant, Gurinder Chadha, Wes Craven, Alfonso Cuarón, Gérard Depardieu, Christopher Doyle, Walter Salles, Alexander Payne, Tom Tykwer and Olivier Assayas. Rated R. Runtime 1hr 56min (partially subtitled). Showtimes (in Taylor): Daily at (2:30), 5:00, 7:30 Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 22 www.kwtn.com meryl berman All the Rage Dear Dennis, Can you spare some social change? Let(he) us p(l)ay tribute (figuratively) to thirteen swing mayoral votes in this big band-aid era of conch carnivores and two step commission candidates. Who will singh off key for their comped supper with (c)offers of sunset (santa) clauses? Keep your ayes on the comprehensive plan. Who dances to chamber pot music with offshore oil drilling rights? Keep your ayes on the comprehensive plan. Who is elementary schooled to believe catsup is a transient licensed vegetable? Keep your ayes on the comprehensive plan. Who will annex my vote of confidence? Keep your ayes on the rewrite of the comprehensive plan. This word jazz bitch has cat scratch fever from a Ted Nugent outbreak of referenda; and yes, my Ken Nordine-owned heart is a lonely hunter when henna is a primary color. Keep your ayes on the comprehensive prize. Meow, boychic. Keys elections are a dating game, set and matched.com to musical cheers, estranged bedfellows and dangerous liaisons. There are candid-dates who dance to tunes man-dated by others; few partners can write an original score. Poetic slams unveil a different beat to rhyme and reason (but good assonance is always appealing). And yes, breaking up is hard to do. Morgan and Harry do not like one another and splitsville is not niceville. And yes, Harry seams ticked with Rossi for his perceived political infidelity towards Harry’s chosen successor. And yes, Harry appears to have a penchant for the utility board pension plan (and cherry-picked filers to police off-the-cuff votes for his slice of the pie). My choice for a hit parade single: How Can I Miss You When You Won’t Go Away? And yes, D(iogenes) J search engines reveal a platonic flip side to the coinage of seaport harbored cynicism and naivete. Who will be cream-mated, buried alive, or (sun)rise from the dead to charon the river styx ferry when the power fails? Bight the silver bullet or ballot with me. And yes, I understand I may be asked for an exchange of more traditional favors when a developer invites me to dinner. The old conch guard will try to eat its young. Is it a recall for code enforcement or a dupe it out bubba boxing day? Anger management voting blocs are a bettor ms.fit punishment for Julio’s take-out crime bill and coo(p) de grace than community servicing. And have you seen the Bet-hell bumper stickers? Were they ordered with the neon orange parking meter signs for a diss-count? My beat-nick political plank: All bars should have that verity same color glow-in-the-dark domestic violence hotline number (305294-0824) plastered onto cash registers. And yes, all players need to up their own(ed) wuthering heights ante to parse the occam’s edge of patronage use and abuse. I propose a roast and toast to in vino veritas ripple effects: Will(power) Stock Island mobile homes become command centers for affordable housing special response teams? And yes, keep a third eye on who campaign manages whom(evergreen). CONTINUED on next page Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 23 www.kwtn.com Meryl Berman’s All the Rage FROM page 22 Hometown slates have formed behind the iron(y) curtain and are based on the enemy of my enemy is my October 2nd alliance. Political machines are being greased down by the school yard and will be F-CAT (as in fat cat) tested from Truman Annex to Wisteria Island before sailing past a sweetheart deal at the Yacht Club and into Cuban waters. And yes, Julio will wave his flag from the sidelines. Duck soup, anyone? This groucho marxist theory of relativity and permanent government wins out at the 100K plus club, FKAA pissed and vinegar polls, and public housing top heavy weight lists; address these taxing issues or recount city hall zip zoning in progress votes from a fed-up populace. And yes, j’taime the Waterfront Market and will trade an eight million dollar trash to ash under the board walk deal for a level playing field. Why does anyone watch the sopranos when they can tune in to Channel 77? And yes, I composed my own schooner warped survey for hemingway cats on a hot tin roof and hogfish who can’t get no satisfaction. The envelope, please. Keep your ayes on the rewrite of the comprehensive plan. I am undecided (for mayor); a most unusual low-rise development from someone whose bedtime reading includes watermarked LDRs (local development regulations) and x-filed emails to support hite and density restrictions (and Jim Young). I bone island the right to write-in Bill Verge as a man with a mind and mindset. Or, I may choose to speed date from the non-denominational wistful island phone book; odds are even on someone rising to a nonbinding leadership challenge. Anti-gambling f(r)actions are making book in our town: Who will stay bought? My independent exit poll on favor(autism): Morgan is a conch loyalist. Jimmy is an equal opportunity sleight of hand player. And . . . is there a third choice? All together now: Let’s clarify clean and green slogans for the constituents. Listen to the words but follow the actions in any relationship. And yes, I voted for Jimmy as a known godless heathen last time. And yes, I was rooting for Morgan to make a difference; and no, I don’t like to be stood up. Jimmy, the development dollars follow your twenty year trail but Morgan is reserve labeled pro-development by his own inn actions. Passive corruption is still corruption under the bridge over troubled water of a good samaritan sidebar. And yes, to the 35.2% plus voting public: This is all about you. Stay FIRM with your own consent agenda. And yes, keep your ayes on the rewrite of the comprehensive plan. The in-the-Tank Island dinner men-u turn said it all: “Let them eat cake.” Truth and Trust are an explosive combination. My T&T ticket has coattails to ride for those with the balls to try this novel approach. (A platform shoe-in sex & the city translation: I want to be told I have a fine ass-- not treated like one.) Somewhere between Key West’s spiritual nexus and popping nexium our town will choose a new demographic path. Will it be called bend over lane? Will it be sung to a refrain from Danny Boy? There is a plan for Wisteria Island. Own up to it. People can be surprising in their dr. feelgood (or whiteside) response to an honest touch from a motley crue. And yes, the Christmas Tree gifting affair has taken on a viagra-like tipping point of its own. The people should be proud of their pro-choice contra-receptive staying power; let’s do it together, again. And yes, Mark Rossi and Bill Verge listened to the roil of public indigestion and refused to do the royal flush. I look forward to a redemptive picnic in the park with all stakeholders. Morgan, I want to shake, rattle and roll four degrees of separation from your unaffordable alter to density (vote); prick up your ears to more than an inner childe circle before the vultures devour your flesh. Think and feel a decent learning curve or let the feeding frenzy commence. Appeal to my intellect, please. Jimmy, keep a check on vitriol to complete a back flip with redemptive spins on hysterical perspective. A good tongue-lashing is worth an inch (of paper ballots). You know the seduction game; let’s play virgin airways before we all get submarined. People want to know: Who is shooting blanks (with cruise ship missiles)? And yes, keep your ayes on the rewrite of the comprehensive plan. Elections are the people’s choice awards. One woman, one vote. It is (y)our turn to name a planning board. Should the spottswood owl be classed as an endangered species? Does this race belong to the swift? Lilliputian a vote from whichever side splitting cay club, king’s pointe or big pine you choose to straddle. Don’t moan after the party is over. Fake it if you have no rhythmic passion for the same old shafting by good government (in)difference. And yes, I want to be courted with judicial restraint from temper tantrums and expect one human(e) family respect for katy(did) tarts. No key (s)lime. Try leather and lacing your favorite positions with a few good facts as well as situational ethics; honorary conchs should not be labeled oxymorons. And yes, there is a gerrymandered afterlife (post-election) for prince charmings in our small town country of yes. VOTERS. An old and new town saying from the Washington crowd: “Half the politicians hope that citizens don’t understand the issues while the other half fear that people actually do.” When the music stops, where will you be left last standing? There is no drought restriction on wishing well(s) in our fare city; but the wishbone will never replace the backbone. And yes, I like a man out of uniform to twist the knight away; but inn the careful construction of considered embrace I prefer to give headaches. And yes, I dare to asterisk: Was it good for you? Per ardua ad . . . nihil or astra? Let’s make this election day a binding referendum for the future health and welfare plan of KW. Has Bum Farto left the building? Register your opinion. VOTE like it counts. And yes, keep your ayes on the fine print of the comprehensive prize. Peace out with power. Meryl Berman (merylb@)bellsouth.net) is a freelance writer and realtor. All the Rage will appear in print every other week— once again— until (l)it does not. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 24 www.kwtn.com O’Boyle On the Income Tax Fraud O’BOYLE, from page 10 ment. The payee at that point can do a couple of things. He could not respond. Non-response essentially grants permission to the tax agency to presume the reports are correct, create a Substitute for Return for calculating a tax liability, claim any withheld or prepaid funds up to the liability and issue a “Notice of Deficiency” for any unpaid balance. Non-response may also invite the tax agency to impose punishments, such as a “failure to file” penalty. Penalties apply because the “information returns” allege that the payee received more than the minimum income that would require filing a return. The payee’s silence confirms the truth of the allegation. On the other hand, the payee could respond to the allegations by filing a valid return. On the return he can either acknowledge the reported payments are “income” or, if he finds they are not “income” as defined in the statutes, as is the case with most private sector earnings, he can correct those allegations. In either case, the payee would take any deductions, credits and exemptions and calculate his liability according to the instructions, and self-assess his tax. Corrections to the mistaken “information return” figures often result in a liability of zero. Once it receives the return, the IRS has a few options: 1. It can issue a refund check or credit if the self-assessed amount is less than the amount that has been withheld or is otherwise available for credit for that period. 2. It can bill the filer for any balance due if the amount assessed on the return is more than the amount available for credit for that period; or 3. It can determine that the amount self-assessed is deficient and issue a “Notice of Deficiency”-- but it can only correct calculation errors. For instance, if the filer added up some numbers wrong or made a mistake multiplying the tax rate by the taxable figure. When a return has been filed, the agency has the authority to correct errors based on the reported “income” figure. It has no authority to change that figure. This is why the agency often denies a return has been filed when it receives a correct return showing little or no taxable income. You can think of this as the “my dog ate your homework” strategy. That is also why any changes the agency proposes to the income figures on a return must be approved, with a signature under penalties of perjury, by the taxpayer before they become valid. The IRS has no authority to change returns without the approval of the filer. There are other strategies the IRS uses to evade the law. Declaring returns “frivolous” is one. This is done in the hope the filer will back down from his sworn testimony. The Service counts on its two loyal thugs, Fear and Confusion, in this strategy. “Frivolous” returns may be ignored, which is what the Service wants to do to accurately filed returns. A third strategy involves sending proposed changes that invite the filer to abandon his original testimony. They propose alternate numbers on a handy form which the filer can sign under penalty of perjury. If he does so he has modified his original return. The filer says in effect, “It was all a big mistake.” Once again Fear and Confusion stand by the door fondling their pistols to help with the agency’s shake down of the baffled citizen. The educated filer, however, has no need to back down from his sworn testimony, nor any reason to believe his private earnings are subject to tax as federal privileges. The Service’s own regulation couldn’t be more clear on the matter: 26 CFR Sec.301.6203-1 Method of assessment. …The amount of the assessment shall, in the case of a tax shown on a return by a taxpayer, be the amount so shown… Not the amount the Service proposes in its correspondence with you, nor the amount they wish you had put on your return, but the amount you show on your return. Only you can determine it. Only you can change it. You, too, can become an educated filer. Visit www.losthorizons.com. Buy the book. Get up off your knees. Hal O’Boyle writes from the suburbs of San Jose, Costa Rica. His articles are archived at www.the-extremist.com. He answers polite e-mail politely at [email protected]. Hemingway Never Had Cats In Key West FROM page 10 ambiance of the Hemingway House. The cats reside on the property just as the cats did in the time of Hemingway himself.” Only one little problem here.. Ernest Hemingway never owned any cats when he lived in the now-famous house on Whitehead Street in the 1930s. In an article in the Miami Herald’s Tropic magazine in August 1994, Patrick Hemingway is quoted as saying, “That cat business is important because its so phony.” Patrick is one of Ernest’s sons. He lived in the Hemingway home here from the time he was 3 until he was 23. “We had cats in Cuba, but we never had any cats in Key West,” he said. “We had raccoons and peacocks.” Only Commissioner Bill Verge bothered to do any homework before voting “no” on the cat-related ordinance. “The cat myth is nice and good for tourism, but I’m reluctant to pass legislation based on myth,” Verge said. But the apparent fact that Hemingway never owned cats in Key West did not deter Mayor Morgan McPherson or Commissioners Danny Kolhage, Mark Rossi, Clayton Lopez and Jose Menendez. They all voted “yes”. Commissioner Harry Bethel was on vacation. The significance of this little story is this: If you have ever had the feeling that the Mayor and at least some of the Commissioners sometimes cast votes based on “made up” information, now you have solid, documented proof. They do. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 25 www.kwtn.com BARNES LAW: Q&A Mediation What is “Mediation ?” Part I of a series by Michael Barnes In Florida, “Mediation” is defined as a process where by a neutral and impartial third person acts to encourage and facilitate the resolution of a dispute without prescribing what it should be. It is an informal and non-adversarial process intended to help disputing parties reach a mutually acceptable agreement. Many people confuse “Arbitration” with “Mediation.” The important difference is that, for the most part, an arbitrator listens to both sides and then decides which party prevails. A mediator has no power to impose a solution or a result, which is not agreed to by the parties. The mediator uses his or her skills to assist the parties in reaching their own agreement. So, in plain English, what does that mean? It means that people, who are caught up in a dispute, where both sides are unwilling or unable to solve the problem, may benefit from a trained and unbiased thirdparty to break the deadlock. Mediation can be used in family law areas. Mediation may help with such disputes as custody, visitation, childsupport, alimony, division of assets and liabilities and similar issues. Mediation is also used in many civil disputes that are not related to children and family issues. Generally, the mediation process begins either with a Court Order or by agreement of the parties. A mediator is selected and agreed to be acceptable to both of the parties. The parties and the mediator meet, usually, at a neutral site. A mediation usually begins with the mediator describing the process. Next, each party will describe the dispute from their point of view. The mediator may ask questions of each party. A good mediator will try to keep tempers in check and interruptions to a minimum. Many times, the mediator will ask the parties to then separate so that the mediator can speak with each side individually. This is called a “caucus.” Some people compare it to “shuttle diplomacy” where the mediator moves back and forth between the parties, working on specific issues and their resolution. The mediator will keep his conversation with you con- MICK BARNES fidential unless you tell him to disclose something to the other side. The process continues with the mediator working with the parties to identify the issues that can be solved. A mediation can result in three major outcomes. One possible outcome is that no agreement is reached on any issue. This is called an “impass.” The parties can’t reach an agreement on any issue. In a second outcome, which occurs more frequently, a complete resolution of issues is reached. When this occurs, the mediator will reduce the agreement to writing, while the parties are present, and have them sign the agreement. In most cases, this agreement will be presented to the Court. The Court will review the agreement and if it is satisfactory, the Court will then issue an order directing the parties to abide by their agreement. A third possible result is that the parties will agree on some but not all of the issues. In this case, the issues that are agreed to between the parties will be memorialized in a writ- ten agreement. Issues are not resolved in mediation are, for the most part, resolved by the Court. Next Week – Mediation Part II - How can mediation help me? Michael R. Barnes practices law in Key West, Florida. His comments are provided as a community service and are not offered as legal advice for a particular set of circumstances. If you are concerned that you may need a lawyer, you are encouraged to contact one and follow his or her advice for your individual situation. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 26 www.kwtn.com MILITARIA WANTED Civil War, Spanish American, WW1 & 2, swords, medals, helmets, daggers, uniforms, old guns, any country. Silver dollars, too. Cash, Collector. Contact John 296-9899. Help Wanted For Busy Kitchen OILY’S AUTO REPAIR MIKE YOUNG, CERTIFIED ASE TECHNICIAN 5669 5th AVE, STOCK ISLAND• 296-6656 Line Experience with Knowledge of Grill & Sautee. Apply at Finnegan’s Wake 320 Grinnell St. the community If your club or organization has something special happening, let us know: • [email protected] • PO box 567, Key West FL 33041 • Fax 305-292-1882 To help us help you, try to get the information to us by noon on Tuesday before Friday publication. DIVE ALIVE LOBSTER RODEO AND EXPO—Mon., July 23, 10am-7pm at the Dive Campus of FKCC. Free event to help recreational divers refresh their dive skills and knowledge in a fun and controlled environment. SCUBA and snorkeling skills stations, games, and safety briefings. More info: www.divealive.org BOATING SKILLS & SEAMANSHIP COURSE—Aug. 4 & 5 at Florida Keys Community College. $55 fee for course materials. To register call Elsie at 305-745-8355. WINNING OVER DEPRESSION SERIES—6 week series begins June 7, 7pm at Key West Church of Christ Fellowship Hall. Class size is limited, reserve your seat by calling 305-296-3111 or e-mail: [email protected] Cost of materials: $15. SURVEY SEEKING HEALTH CARE ANSWERS— WomanKind is seeking volunteer to log on to www.womankindkey- west.org to complete a brief survey that will help determine ways to design diagnostic and wellness programs to benefit employees of businesses and individuals without health insurance. Survey takers’ identity will remain confidential. KEY WEST POPS NEEDS VOLUNTEERS FOR 9TH SEASON—all different skills can be utilized. To volunteer or for more info: 305-296-6059 KWPopsInfo@ comcast.net VOLUNTEERS NEEDED AT TROPIC CINEMA—All areas of operation. Flexible schedules, free passes, pop-corn, and t-shirts. Info: Lori Reid, 305-433-4183 or [email protected] CITIZENSHIP CLASSES-Literacy Volunteers offers free Citizenship classes for intermediate English as a Second Language students. Info: 294-4352. VOLUNTEERS NEEDED AT WILDLIFE CENTER--Key West Wildlife Center has reopened to accept injured animals. Volunteers and donations are needed. Questions and info: 305292-1008. WANT TO BE A LITERACY VOLUNTEER? More than 100 students waiting to be tutored. You do not have to speak another language to be a tutor. Info: Mary at 305-294-4352. GRANTS AVAILABLE TO WRITERS, MUSICIANS, ACTORS, ARTISTS--Contact the Florida Keys Council of the Arts, 305-295-4369. BOATING COURSES--The CONTINUED on next page Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 27 www.kwtn.com the community FROM previous page U.S. Coast Guard Auxiliary conducts boating courses throughout the year. Info: 1-888-470-5566 FREE SPAY/NEUTER CLINICS--The Florida Keys SPCA free spay/neuter clinics are held at the FKSPCA Animal Shelter, 5230 College Road , Stock Island. Microchips for $5 and free rabies vaccinations are available for all pets. Cats and dogs in heat or pregnant and puppies and kittens as young as eight weeks can be spayed or neutered. Appointments are required for rabies and for spay/neuter. Call 292-4600 to register. The clinic is sponsored by Key West Kritter Patrol and the Florida Keys SPCA. VOLUNTEERS NEEDED-AIDS HELP, INC. needs volunteers to help with transportation, office work, special events, etc. Call 296-6196. THE YMCA of Key West offers a variety of programs for children, adults and families, including skating, bocce, computer classes and more: The YMCA Center is located at 1011 Virginia Street . Call for info: 305-295-YMCA. LA LECHE LEAGUE— Free monthly meeting for pregnant and breastfeeding moms; mother to mother support with accredited volunteers who give current information and encouragement in the art of breastfeeding. Non-denominational, non-profit. Held 5 - 6 p.m. the second Tuesday of the month in the auditorium at the Key West Library, 700 Fleming Street . Info: Liz 294-4463 or Eva 295-8597. VOLUNTEERS NEEDED-The local unit of the American Cancer Society seeks volunteer drivers to provide transportation for cancer patients to treatments and licensed cosmetologists, or hairdressers, to help cancer patients feel good about their appearance while undergoing cancer treatment. Info: 292-2333 x 112. GIVE THE GIFT OF LIFE-To find out when the bloodmobile will be at a location near you, call your Community Blood Center at 305-294-7668. OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS--on Tuesdays at 6pm ‘til 7 and Saturdays 10-11am, at United After Parrish Methodist Church (Old Stone), 600 Eaton Street. Info: Mary at 305-294-6931. WOMEN’S SUPPORT GROUP--Facilitated by counselors in confidential, safe environment. Relax with a cup of tea while helping yourself and others with problem solving stress reduction. Free, 5:30 to 7 p.m. every Wednesday; for location and information, call WomanKind, 305-294-4004. LOCALS SONGWRITERS NIGHT—every Wednesday 7pm, upstairs lounge at Hard Rock Café. Open to all ages. Free admission. Info: 305-360-2398. Key West THE NEWSPAPER July 13, 2007 Page 28 www.kwtn.com
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