Pizza Boulders

Lost Causes
A Climbing Guide to the Mesilla Valley
Installment 2.4
Dona Ana Mountains
Pizza Boulders
By: Charles Cundiff
Pizza Boulders
Legend has it that back in the day (somewhere between 1960 and 1986) the South West Mountaineers would
take some pizza out to these boulders on Wednesday afternoons to power up for some after-class bouldering. Every
generation has their story of how they rediscovered the Pizzas. With every new influx of climbers into New Mexico
State University the adventure starts afresh.
Strewn below the back side of the ever popular
Checker Board, the Pizzas offer perhaps the greatest concentration of boulder problems and top ropes in the Dona Ana
Mountains. The rock is often loose or crumbly, but the polished granite gems that can be found amongst the rubble make
it worth the half hour drive from Las Cruces. Bring your
crash pads, rope and tape, and a spare tire because cell phones
generally don’t work out here.
Javier on Sven’s Crack
Directions
From Las Cruces take State Highway 70 (Main St.)
East . Exit at Mesa Grande Dr. and head West towards Shorty’s Gas Station. Turn right (North) on
Jornada Road. In 6.0 miles you will reach the Chihuahuan Desert Nature Park’s East entrance. Travel
another 0.4 miles and turn left (West) just before the
stone pillars that announce the entrance to the Jornada Experimental Range. Take this road past Bear
Boulder (1.9 miles), the power line road (2.5 miles)
to a left turn up a broad triangle shaped canyon at
3.3 miles. Drive until you’ve nearly reached the end
of the canyon and you will see the Pizza Boulders on
your left (East) with a pullout drive also on the left.
Most vehicles can make it to the turn off, but some
clearance is needed to park at the Pizzas themselves.
Fifty meters farther down the road is another pullout
to access the trailhead for Checkerboard and the
gully boulders.
Charlie Cundiff on Strawberry Milkshake
Photo Ben Parker
1
A view of the Pizza Boulders from the West.
1. Anyways V1 *
Start matched on the under-clings on the North side of the boulder.
2. Knee Clapper V2
Start Right in scoop on south face of boulder
Katie Drexler on
the Knee Clapper
2
Environmentalist Boulder
Problems exist on the West face.
3. Save the Whales V3 **
Start on right side of rail. Traverse
left out to pocket on face and exit up
crack.
4. Nuke the Whales V4 **
Start matched on rail and slap the lip.
Milkshake Boulder
Due East of the Fjords. Down climb the SE corner
5. Strawberry Milkshake V7 *** FA Jason Ploss
Start in side-pull below the big scoop. Slap up the
scoop and exit left.
6. Period Piece V4* FA Walker Kearney
Climb the arête on the West side above the
juniper stump.
The Jew Boulders
Just uphill from the Milkshake boulder.
7. Jewbaca V6 ** FA Walker Kearney
Start with left hand in obvious hueco and right hand
on the arête.
Walker Kearney on Jewbaca
8. Jew Did It V4
9. Jewjitsu V4 *
Start low behind the boulder
on the North side of and traverse right.
10. Jewdonit V4
One move. Dyno for the top
3
The Fjords
The Fjords can be
found thirty yards
North and down hill
from the Supreme
Pizza. They face
West.
Viking Boat Rock
11. So Tall the
Brave V2 **
Start up
Sven’s Crack, then
traverse the face left
to exit on the right
bow of the boat.
12. Sven’s Crack V2 ***
Straight up the crack! An area classic.
13. Sven’s Crack Right V1
If you can’t exit the crack
14. Midgi Mullet V2 FA Walker Kearney
On the NE side, start just above the dead yucca stump on slopey side-pull and a crimp.
15. Jumping for Jesus V1
Dyno from the horizontal crack to the top
16. Sven on Crack V4**
Up Sven’s Crack, then turn the corner and traverse through the
slot until the horizontal crack runs out and then go up.
17. Razorback V0Arete of the rock across the slot from Viking Boat
18. Toquiko V1 *
Start on the side pull jug. Sharp.
SD V6 *
Start in the Hueco on the West face and traverse up into Toquiko.
19. Fording Fjording V0
Slab it up
Walker Kearney on
Razors for Katie
20. Razors for Katie V5 ** FA Charlie Cundiff
Located on a West facing over hang just through the slot in the Fjords and to the
right. Sit down start matched on the side pull. Razor sharp.
4
The Booby Boulder and the Roof
The Booby Boulder
The Biggest boulder on the slope. One SMC button head bolt is available to toprope Jen’s
Cleavage, and the South side can be protected with small cams and chocks.
21. Jen’s Cleavage V0*
The down climb on the Northeast corner.
22. Boobier than Thou V1
Climb up the middle
23. Boobalicious V1 ***
Climb the arete and slap the top.
Making the leap off The Roof
Photo by Ben Parker
The Roof Boulder
24. The Roof V4 ***
Simply the roof as it was the only roof problem done here for awhile. Two rusty 1/4in
bolts exist to protect the boulder. Start on the rail and work towards the crack up left. A
variation exits right without going to the sharp pocket, also V4. Dismount the boulder via the
loose slab on the South face, or take the gutsy leap from the top of the roof to the boulder
across the way.
5
25. Herpes and Slurpies V9 **
FA Jason Ploss
Found just a few yards South of The
Roof boulder, this is the area test
piece. Start sitting and matched on
the full pad crimp and start pulling.
Nick Duttle on Herpes and Slurpies
Blockhead Boulder
Nothing but highballs.
26. Tight End V2 *
27. V2 Fullback
28. V1 Linebacker
Asking for Cactus
There are three easy problems on the
South face. A roof project exists on
the Northwest side.
29. V0
Start on the left leaning crack.
30. Asking for Cactus V0 *
Climb out over the barrel cactus
31. Peyote Please V0 *
6
The Sliced Pear
The surprisingly pocketed block just up the hill and
South from Asking for Cactus.
32. Just Ripe V0 *
Climb the arête.
33. Pocket Please V2 **
Using only face holds, make your way to the
top.
The Juggernaut and the Lions Den
The Juggernaut
Gigantic ship-shape boulder near the gully. (The
bow faces west) There is
one 3/8in bolt on the top
to protect any face.
34. The Bow V1 *
Climb the West pointing
arête and try not to die.
35 The Lions Den V4 ** FA Charlie Cundiff
In the den-like formation behind the Juggernaut start sitting down as far back as you like
and exit out the slot.
7
The Gully Boulders
The Gully Boulders can be approached most easily from the Checker Board Trail and parking
area. The Juggernaut is just north of the gully.
Secret Agent Boulder
36. Cabaret V0Slab on the North side
37. Tig ol bitties V0The down climb.
38. Secret Asian Man V3*
Start below and left of the scoop on a pocket and a crimp and move right to the arete.
39. Secret Agent Man V6*
Same start as Secret Asian Man but go straight up.
40. Tom Thumb V Sure-you-did
Start with a right thumb mantle and a left sidepull on the vertical block in the center of
the South face.
A Boulder with a Slab
41. Slabby Doo V0
American Transvestite Boulder
42. Ru Paul’s Cankles V4
43. Guns, Guts and God V6*
Climb the arete.
44. Two Wrong Fools V3
45. Thanks for the pocket Julie NewmarV0 *
Mantle up into the slab and hope you reach the pocket.
8
The Pizza Boulder and Satellites
The boulders you can park next too at the first pull off. The obvious looking line on the North
side of the larger boulder is a no-go as it would involve smearing some ancient rock art. .
The smaller boulder has two bolts on top to top rope any side, though it can be easily protected
with crash pads as well.
The Pizza Boulder
46. Campus Crusade V5
A two move wonder followed by some scary and loose slab.
47. Aid Roof A2?
A bolt ladder on the overhang.
48. Anchovies V3
Pizza Pie Boulder
49. Pizza Pie V0
The classic slab on the West ace
50. Boston Pie V2
51. Face o’ Choss V0
52. Peeling Pepperonis V0
53. Down Climb VB
Downclimb the North face
The Pizza Boulder and the overhang containing
ancient rock art.
V0 Boulder
54-56 V0
9
57. Meatball Traverse V0
Windy Woman
58. Lotsa Matza V2 SD
Sit down on in the hueco undercling and go
straight up.
5.8
59. Philly Cheese Steak V2
Two variations
O
Windy Woman
5.8
Windy Woman is the granite dome above the Pizza
Boulders. Routes range from one to two pitches.
O
5.9
x
5.9
5.9
North
Face
West Face
10