april 2013 issue - Rachel Williston
Transcription
april 2013 issue - Rachel Williston
1 Pretty T Girls April 2013 The Magazine for the most beautiful girls in the world A publication of Pretty T Girls Yahoo group 2 In This Issue PAGE Editorial by: Barbara Jean 3 Glamorous Red Lipsticks from the Drugstore Back to Basics Beauty Tips and Tricks Better Brows and Lashes The Exploits of Barbara Marie The Adventures of Judy Sometimes Tasi’s Musings Second Cover Girl Contest Coming Humor Angels In the Centerfold TG Tips From Mellissa A New Yahoo Group Rhonda’s Ramblings The Ramblings of A Married T Girl—Stephanie Rene Tasi’s Fashion News—Your Handbag & You Colorful Spring Dresses $30 & Under Lucille Sorella How to Keep Clothes Looking New 12 Strategies For Clearing Clutter The Gossip Fence Shop Till You Drop Calendar 3 4 6 13 17 18 20 24 25 26 30 35 36 37 39 42 45 47 50 53 65 73 3 CHURCH An Editorial by: Barbara Jean I recall being told where a group of kids where on a scavenger hunt and one of the items they needed was a church key. Well the kids went to a church and asked the pastor for a key to the church for their scavenger hunt. Well most of us know that a church key was slang for a bottle opener. For many people the beer bottle and the bar was church. For many years we of the LGBT community were not welcomed in church, we were considered to be sinners who not only were living in sin but would not turn from the sin of homosexuality or transgenderism. Things started to change for us in 1968 where in Los Angeles Rev. Troy Perry founded the Metropolitan Community Church, a church that not only was for members of the LGBT community, but one that was Christian based, and taught that everybody was loved and welcomed by God. Today the MCC has almost 300 congregations in some 22 countries and about 43,000 members. That was a start for us. Today more and more churches have opened their doors to members of the LGBT community. Episcopalians, Unitarians, Unity, United Church of Christ are but a few of the denominations that have become welcoming to us. There are even some that are part of a denomination that may still today preach against us, but the individual church did not agree with the denominations teachings. As I look through the postings on our boards I find that many girls have found they have had a wonderful experience in being able to worship the God of their choice as the person that God created them to be. Not all are attending an MCC church. One writes of attending a Methodist church, another I know attends a Catholic church and I know a couple that even attend a Jewish Temple as her true self. I myself have attended a UCC church for many years as Barbara, even before going full time enfemme. There are others also, Unity, Unitarian to name just a couple The person that God created us to be… Most of us believe that we were born transgender and if that is the case than that is what God had created us as. We may not know why, but I do believe that God does have a purpose in creating us the way we are. Thus I think it is only fitting that we worship him as the person who he made us. How often have we seen that WWJD, What Would Jesus Do? Jesus did not reject anyone. He rebuked those who used the church for personal gain, and he rebuked those who looked down on others. Perhaps my favorite bible verse 1 Samuel 16:7 tells us that God looks upon our heart. While there may be some that condemn us, God does not and now many churches recognize this and have welcomed us rather than condemn us. 4 3 Glamorous Red Lipsticks (from the drugstore!) BY HEATHER FONSECA I’ve always wanted to be the kind of girl who wore red lipstick all day, every day, even to the gym. It sounds like a great combination of dedication, glamour and predictability. Unfortunately I get bored easily, and so switch my lipstick colors according to the season. Once a year, in December, I really do become a red lipstick girl, wearing it everywhere. The brilliant color stands out on chilly, bleak days and brightens up whatever I’m wearing. Recently I’ve been obsessed with these three elegant, creamy, long-lasting red lipsticks. They look as good worn to the grocery store as they do at a party, and they’re cheap! Each one is sold at the drugstore for under $10. Maybelline Color Sensational Lipstick in Revival” “Red Words like “bombshell”, “retro” and “glamourpuss” come to mind upon applying this deep, cool, red lipstick. Although the advertisements show a shimmery red, it’s a true cream with no sparkle at all. Staying power – impressive. It comes off on coffee cups and the like, but stays on lips for a few hours if you don’t eat or drink anything. Feel on lips – creamy and smooth. Bleed – minimal. Smell – This lipstick smells almost buttery, but in a good way. “In the Red” Super Lustrous Matte Lipstick by Revlon I’m not normally a big fan of matte lipstick. I don’t like the dry feeling, or look, on my lips. On the other hand I do like to try new things and after years of wearing shiny everything a matte shade is refreshing. I love the dark 5 brick-red color. It’s unusual but very sophisticated. Of the three lipsticks this one is my favorite choice for daytime. Staying power – The lipstick stays on for a long time, but I reapply it often otherwise it stains my lips a weird reddish-brown. Feel on lips – This lipstick feels fairly dry but because it’s lightweight it’s not annoying. Bleed – nonexistent. It doesn’t budge, staying within the lip line nicely even without the addition of lip liner. Smell – This lipstick smells softly of citrus. Covergirl Lip Perfection Lipcolor in “Hot” Not for the faint-hearted, this neon red is impossible to ignore and such a powerful statement that not much other makeup is needed to look completely “done”. Staying power – amazing. The color is so heavily pigmented that it stains your lips a bright cherry-pink. Even if the lipstick wears off a bit you don’t notice. It stays fresh looking for hours. Feel on lips - Slightly dry, but not irritatingly so. Bleed - I notice a slight bleeding into the fine lines around my mouth, but it’s minimal. Smell - The lipstick has an appealing, old-fashioned lipstick smell. From left to right, Maybelline’s “Red Revival”, Revlon’s “In the Red”, and Covergirl’s “Hot”. As you can tell from the photo I wear all three lipsticks. No one has paid me for the review, I just want to share these three glamorous, inexpensive lip colors with you. *Update July 2012: I noticed recently that Revlon’s “In the Red” has been discontinued since I did this review. Sigh. Another one bites the dust. 6 Back-to-Basics Beauty Tips and Tricks By Alexandra Gonzalez Repetto How to heal dry skin, ace eyeliner application, curl stick-straight hair, and master other beauty skills—each in three simple steps. Makeup Lessons How to Apply Foundation 1. Smooth primer onto your face. This creates an even canvas and helps makeup last longer, especially if you have oily skin. 2. Put a dot of foundation on each cheek and your chin, nose, and forehead. Blend from the center of your face outward, using a damp foundation brush or a makeup wedge for the thinnest coating. You can also blend with just your fingers— your body heat will help the formula melt into your skin for a more natural finish. Extra credit: If your foundation tends to cake up, especially in the creases around your nose and under your eyes, smooth it out with a fingertip’s worth of eye cream. How to Apply Highlighter 1. Form the letter C with your thumb and index finger. Place the thumb on your cheekbone and the index finger on your brow bone. 2. Remove your hand and apply a small amount of cream, liquid, or powder highlighter in the shape of that C, says Wende Zomnir, a cofounder of Urban Decay cosmetics. Blend well with your fingers. If you’re afraid you’ve gone overboard, tone the color down by dusting a little loose powder on top, says Maggie Ford Danielson, a beauty authority for Benefit Cosmetics. Extra credit: Highlighter can do more than give you luminous skin; it’s also handy for creating optical illusions. To make close-set eyes look farther apart, dab a bit onto the inner eye corners. If you want your mouth to appear more shapely, apply highlighter to the bow of your upper lip with a flat-tip brush. To make your face look slimmer, sweep it down the center of your nose. How to Create a Straight Line With Liquid or Pencil Eyeliner 1. Dot liner between your lashes, working from the inner corner of the eye to the outer one. 2. Using light, feathery strokes, connect the dots. If you need to steady your hand, 7 rest your elbow on your mirror or a table. End the line where your lashes do, says Mikey Castillo, the director of color for the makeup line Le Métier de Beauté. If you want a more theatrical cat-eye effect, extend it straight past the end of your lash line just a tad. Extra credit: Set the liner (and mask any wobbles) by tracing over it with a shadow in the same color, using a thin, angled makeup brush. How to Use an Eyelash Curler 1. Begin with clean, makeup-free lashes. (If you curl after applying mascara, the tool can stick to the makeup and damage or yank out hairs.) 2. For allover curl, choose a full-width curler. To curl just the outer corners of your lashes (a more eye-opening effect), pick a mini curler. Position the tool as close as possible to the base of your upper lashes and squeeze for a few seconds. Move the curler slightly outward, to midlash, and gently squeeze again for a second or two. Extra credit: For more dramatic and lasting curl, blast the curler with a hair dryer for a few seconds before you crimp. (It’s like using hot rollers on your hair. But make sure to test the heat against your hand before applying!) Makeup Tool Kit Primer: Look for a color-correcting formula if your skin is ruddy or sallow, a gel if it’s oily, and a cream if it’s dry. Foundation: To find your ideal shade, test the product near your jawline—not on your hand, which is usually darker than your face. Eyelash curler: A minimalist’s must-have, this sturdy tool can be tossed in your bag for an instant lift even on no-makeup days. Mascara: Trash it after three months. (Really.) And to avoid clumps, refrain from pumping the wand in the tube; this dries out the makeup. Clear brow gel: While it may not sound essential, nearly every makeup artist stashes this no-color groomer in her kit. It makes even unplucked brows look polished, and it can be used as mascara when you’re in a bind. 8 Eye-shadow quad or trio: Skin-tone pinks and browns can take eyes of any color from day to night; the brown can also fill in brows. Eyeliner: A brown pencil is the most goofproof and suits everyone, says Jemma Kidd, a London-based makeup artist. Bronzer-and-blush duo: Use the bronzer where you would tan and the blush for a pop of color on each cheek. Tinted lip balm or moisturizing cream lipstick: Something a shade or two lighter or deeper than your natural lip tone will complement everything else in your makeup kit. A big, fluffy brush: If you can have only one tool, this multitasker is good for blush, bronzer, and loose powder. Skin-Care Lessons How to Wash Your Face 1. First wash your hands. Touching your face with dirty fingers can spread bacteria, which may lead to clogged pores and breakouts. 2. You may not need to cleanse in the morning unless your skin is oily or you’ve just exercised. At night, if you use longwear makeup, take it off with a waterproof-makeup remover or a wipe. This will allow the cleanser to really penetrate the skin. Splash your face with cool or lukewarm water, then, with your fingertips, massage a dollop of cleanser into your skin in a gentle circular motion to emulsify the product fully, advises Luigi Polla, a dermatologist and the founder of the Alchimie Forever skincare line. Rinse with more water, then lightly pat dry with a towel. Extra credit: Cream cleansers don’t always lather and dislodge debris as effectively as gels do, so use them with a washcloth, says Elizabeth Tanzi, a dermatologist in Washington, D.C. Don’t forget to wash the cloth after each use to avoid germs. How to Handle a Blemish Without Leaving a Scar 1. Soak a washcloth in hot water, then wring it out. Hold it on the top of the whitehead until the washcloth cools. 2. Press down gently around the blemish for about 30 seconds with the cloth. This should be enough to draw out the whitehead without squeezing, says Katie Rodan, a dermatologist in Oakland and a cofounder of the Proactiv Solution skin-care line. 9 3. Apply a treatment that contains benzoyl peroxide or salicylic acid. Extra credit: Handling a blemish before it’s ready (that is, before it’s white at the top) may only push oil and debris in deeper, making the problem worse. To help bring the pimple to the surface, use an oil-free medicated concealer (such as Clinique Acne Solutions Clearing Concealer, $16.50, clinique.com) during the day; at night, apply a drying treatment with sulfur or clay (like Mario Badescu Drying Lotion, $17, How to Smooth Rough Skin 1. Add a cup of baking soda to a warm bath and soak in it for 10 minutes. Skin can get rough and dry, especially in places like the heels and elbows, where the keratin cells can build up in the horny outer layer, says Vermen Verallo-Rowell, a dermatologist in Kennebunkport, Maine. “Soda helps slough off the thickened keratin and allows water to penetrate and hydrate the deeper layers of skin cells,” she says. 2. After your bath, apply petroleum jelly to rough spots while your skin is still damp, then slip into cotton clothing to further lock in moisture. Wear it overnight if possible. When the problem has cleared, include a daily moisturizer with an exfoliating alpha hydroxy acid (such as Eucerin Professional Repair Extremely Dry Skin Lotion, $8 at drugstores) in your regimen to improve your skin’s suppleness and appearance. Extra credit: Consider applying virgin coconut oil (sold at health-food stores) along with the petroleum jelly. It contains fatty acids that protect the skin’s barrier function. How to Layer Skin-Care Products 1. Apply in order of consistency, lightest to heaviest, says Peter Thomas Roth, of the eponymous skin-care line. First eye cream and serum, if you use them. 2. Next comes moisturizer. Finally, sunscreen, which you need if your moisturizer doesn’t contain at least SPF 15. Extra credit: In a pinch, you can use your eye cream as face cream. Your eye skin tends to be the most sensitive on your face, so if you can use a product there, you should be able to use it anywhere. 10 Skin-Care Tool Kit Now that you’ve mastered the techniques, here’s what you need to get started. Cleanser: If your skin is dry or sensitive, pick a mild, moisturizing cream. If your skin is combination or oily, go for a gel or a foam. Or, for extra-deep cleaning on any skin type, try an oscillating cleansing brush. Exfoliator: Options include scrubs of various grits and night creams with dead-cell– removing chemical ingredients, such as glycolic acid. What you use and how often you use it are a matter of personal preference and skin sensitivity. But all types will benefit from shedding dead cells to make way for newer, healthier ones. Eye cream: Yes, it’s essential. The undereye area has fewer hydrating oil glands than elsewhere on the face, “so you have to compensate topically,” says Marcia Kilgore, a facialist and the founder of the skin-care line Soap & Glory. Try one with moistureattracting hyaluronic acid and apply it morning or night. Moisturizer: If your primary concern is aging, look for one with an antioxidant, like vitamin C or retinol. If dry skin is your problem, choose a richer formula with hyaluronic acid or glycerin. For oily skin, look for salicylic acid to minimize shine and acne. Sunscreen: There’s one for everyone. Physical-sunscreen ingredients, like titanium dioxide and zinc, are better suited to sensitive skin. Chemical sunscreens, like Parsol 1789, may look less masky. The sunscreen-smell–phobic can use brush-on mineral products (like Laura Mercier Mineral Powder SPF 15, $36, sephora.com), which are odorless and can be swept over makeup. Hair-Care Lessons How to Wash and Condition Your Hair 1. Rub a quarter-size dollop of shampoo in your palms with a little water to create lather. But don’t charge right in and start scrubbing. First pat your hands over your head to distribute the shampoo evenly, says Wendy Bélanger, the global artistic director of Pureology Serious Colour Care. 2. Work the shampoo in with your fingertips (they won’t scratch the scalp the way nails can), then rinse with warm water. Gather your hair into a ponytail in one hand and apply conditioner to the tail only. 11 Even for people with short hair, this is generally the only part that needs additional hydration. Extra credit: Hair can become dry if you shampoo more than a few times a week. If you simply must wash it every day (because you exercise daily or your hair is very fine and tends to get greasy), flip your routine and condition first. Apply conditioner all over (don’t rinse it out yet), then add a small amount of shampoo and work it through. After the conditioner’s moisturizing ingredients sink in, the shampoo shouldn’t remove too much oil, says New York City–based celebrity stylist Mark Garrison. Rinse and you’re done for the day. How to Apply Dry Shampoo 1. “Use a powder dry shampoo if your hair is medium to thick,” says Edgar Parra, a stylist at the Sally Hershberger salon in New York City. “An aerosol, which goes on much lighter and adds volume, is better for finer hair.” 2. Separate your hair into two- to four-inchwide sections. From about six inches away, sprinkle or spray the product onto the roots, where oil can build up. Massage the product into your scalp as if you’re shampooing. Style as usual. Extra credit: In a pinch, try cornstarch, an ingredient in many dry shampoos. How to Do an At-Home Blow-Out 1. Wash hair and prep it with mousse if you need volume, styling cream if you need hydration. 2. Rough-dry by blowing air all around your head. When your hair is at least halfway dry, you’re ready to begin styling (any sooner and the style might not take). Use a round brush for volume or a flat-backed one to smooth. First address any problem areas, such as a cowlick or frizz around your face, says celebrity stylist Oribe; if they dry wrong, they’re nearly impossible to correct without starting over. Next, dry the rest of your hair in sections, working back from the hairline (again, to ensure that the part people notice most looks its best). Extra credit: To avoid frizz, slowly move the dryer from root to tip in one pass, says New York City celebrity stylist Oscar Blandi. Don’t run it up and down the same length of hair or you’ll cause the cuticles to open up. 12 How to Make Any Kind of Hair Curl 1. Prep damp hair with a lightweight mousse. This will create enough tackiness to hold some texture. Then rough-dry. 2. Generously mist hair with hair spray. Starting at the hairline, twist a one-inch section of hair. Wind the twist around the barrel of a curling iron, away from your face. (Use a slim iron for tight curls, a thicker one for loose waves.) Work from front to back until you’ve done your whole head. Extra credit: To speed-curl hair, you can also use a flat iron. Twist a one- or two-inch section, then clamp the twist vertically between the iron’s plates for 30 seconds; repeat until all hair is curled. Hair-Care Tool Kit Shampoo and conditioner: Whether you choose products that are color-protective (for tinted hair), hydrating (for dry), or deep-cleaning (for oily), keep in mind that you may have to switch formulas periodically. Your hair’s needs can change depending on the weather and how much you’ve been heat styling, which can sap moisture from hair. Leave-in conditioner: While you may not require extra hydration daily, this styler can also double as a detangler and a heat protector. Dry shampoo: Besides absorbing oil from unwashed hair, it can add body and texture to clean hair. Flexible-hold hair spray: The newer, lighter formulas keep an updo in place and also tame frizz and give hair some lift. A good hairbrush: Boar-bristle brushes tend to be best at distributing natural oils, but they’re often expensive. If they’re out of your price range, look for a combination of boar and plastic bristles. A hair dryer: The most important tool to invest in. An ionic machine with a high wattage (at least 1,200) will help reduce damage by speeding up drying time. And less damage equals more shine. A flat iron: Sure, it can straighten. But even people with straight hair can use it to help seal cuticles and amplify shine. 13 Better Brows and Lashes By: WEBMD How to Get Perfect Brows Craving a movie star's eyebrows? The perfect brow size and shape for your face depends on your own features. If your brow were divided into thirds, the thick end should start at the bridge of your nose. The arch should be around the middle. The thin end should go just past the corner of your eye. Get Thicker Brows Fill in sparse brows with a powder, pencil, or gel. Go two shades lighter than your hair color if you’re brunette, two shades darker if you have pale blonde or silver hair. When in doubt, taupe works on almost everyone. Use tiny strokes over your arches and blend with a brow brush to remove extra color. Skip the Stencils The perfect brow is based on your unique bone structure. Using a stencil to draw on your brows may seem like it takes the guesswork out of shaping. But you may not like the results. A stenciled brow that's just a little bit off can make you look angry, surprised, older, or even lopsided. No thanks! Better to work with your natural brow shape. Make Brows Match Your Hair If you make a dramatic hair color change, your brows should change, too. You’ll want to see a professional colorist. Don't dye your brows at home, even if you have a really steady hand. Need a quick fix? Blend mascara or concealer into your brows to instantly go darker or lighter. 14 Get The Natural Look Actress Camilla Belle proves you don't need whipthin, sculpted brows to look modern. To get yours as lush as possible, don't pluck a single hair for three months. Then have them shaped professionally or pluck only the most obvious strays yourself. Use a brow filler for better definition. Use the Right Tweezers Rounded tip or pointy? Experts like a pointed, slanted tip, especially if you haven't plucked before. You can hold that shape easily and grab longer hairs. For those short, stubborn hairs, turn the tweezer at an angle and pull from the pointed edge Can You Pluck The Tops? It's OK as long as you focus on the peach fuzz there and on your temples. Most of the real shaping should happen underneath to lift the brow up. Pluck too much off the top and you could get flat brows that make you look scowly. When to Put the Tweezers Down If you see a teeny little dot of hair growing under the skin, resist the urge to pull it. You don’t want to break the skin and risk a scar. Wait a day and that little hair probably will poke through the surface, ready to be plucked. In the meantime, if it bothers you, cover it with concealer. 15 Let a Pro Guide You If you aren't sure about your own brow judgment, a salon specialist can find the best shape for your face. Snap a few photos for reference at home. To keep your new look fresh, lightly pluck new hair growth once a week. For best results, make another appointment four to six weeks later Open Your Eyes Curled lashes make you look wide-eyed. Do it before you put on mascara. Use firm pressure but don't clamp down too hard. You don't want to pinch your skin, crease your lashes, or pull them out. You may get better results from curling in stages, moving out from the lash roots to the tips. A corner lash curler can get to hard-to-reach outer ones. Brush Up on Your Mascara Your mascara matters for making lashes look fuller or longer. The brush matters, too! Rubber bristles coat even the tiniest lashes from root to tip, adding length. Plastic bristles give you a clean, natural-looking lash line. Fiber bristles build lash thickness and boost the fringe. If you like your mascara but want a new look, try using a different brush. You can buy them at beauty stores Smooth Moves to Prevent Clumping You don't want eyes that look like scary spiders! Dip the brush in the tube and wipe it on a paper towel (not a tissue) to get rid of extra mascara. Another trick: Twirl a clean, disposable mascara wand through wet lashes. For easy, no-scrub cleanup, loosen the mascara with a warm, damp washcloth. Press it against your closed eyes. Next, dip a cotton pad into a makeup remover for sensitive eyes. Wipe the pad downward on your lashes a few times. 16 Don't Flake Out By the end of the day, do you get flecks of mascara on your cheeks? Look for a "tubing" mascara. Tubing formulas tend not to flake because they encase lashes. When you remove the mascara with warm water, it slides off as complete tubes. Expert tip: Set your regular mascara with a tubing kind Fabulous Fakes False lashes equal pure Hollywood glamour, but they can be tricky to master. They come in full strips and individual lashes. Hold the lash with a pair of tweezers while you put a dot of glue on your upper eyelid. Let the glue thicken, and then use the tweezers to guide the lash to your lid. If you have dark skin, try a dark-tone glue made for brown or black lashes. Lash Extensions: Pros and Cons Short on patience -- or time? Lash extensions can give you a long, full, lush fringe for two to three weeks. The catch is you can't wear mascara. (You might not want to anyway.) And you will probably have to keep them completely dry. So get a pair of swim goggles to wear while you shower or wash your hair. No kidding! 17 The Exploits of Barbara Marie A LESSON LEARNED THE HARD WAY! BY BARBARA MARIE DAVIDSON Well, ladies, you know all of the signs and advertisements you read, see and hear about cell phones and texting, using your “blue tooth”. Well they are all true. I am a living example of what can go wrong when you least expect it. January 23rd, my son asked me to follow him to take his motorcycle to the shop and bring him home. I had just left my garage and stared down my drive way, when my cell phone rang. The blue tooth in the car had not kicked in yet. My drive way is over 700 feet long and lined with dogwood trees. I was only doing about 20 mph when I picked up the phone to see who was calling. About that same moment, my car veered slightly to the right and hit one of the dogwood trees on the right front of the car. I did not think that I was hurt but I was mistaken. I did have several scrapes on my right arm. I am on coumadin (a blood thinner) for Atrial Fib and the therapeutic level (INR) is between 2 and 3. Mine that morning was 2.7. Needless to say, the damage to my car amounted to over $9,000 (nine Thousand dollars), all because of a stupid mistake on my part. It took a while for me to stop the “bleeding due to my INR. Several days later, I began to develop a hematoma (bleeding into my thigh) Apparently my thigh had hit the steering wheel, as well as my right cheek. When I realize that I was developing the hematoma in my thigh, I did what I have done in the past that was to put myself on bed rest with an ice bag to my thigh. Well, that created another problem, one that was a little more serious in the long run. I thought that I was keeping my self hydrated and eating different things, but apparently I was not. It is a long way from my bedroom to the kitchen. On February the 7th, I was in the kitchen fixing my self something to eat, when I got very dizzy and short of breath.. I drank some gater ade and lay down for a while then got dressed and went to the ER. On arrival, my pulse was 40 and my blood pressure was 80 over 40, which are not good. This was brought on by my lack of fluids and improper eating, which resulted in my electrolytes being all screwed up. My Potassium was high, my sodium was low, my hemaglobulin was low (due to the hematoma), and my blood sugar was high. Basically, I was in trouble, big time. I was admitted to CCU – cardiac care unit - that became my home away from home for 3 days. After two liters of NACL (saline), and multiple lab test, my blood work began to return to normal and I began to feel more like my “old” self again. To digress slightly, this was an excellent opportunity for me to do some out reach as some of the folks taking care of me never knew “Bill” who use to work there.. Many had never met a transgendered person like my self, so I did a lot of out reach during my stay there about my transition to the person I have become today. 18 On the third day just about every thing had returned to normal and the doctors felt that I could go home. Thus on the Saturday afternoon, I was allowed to go home. I was to make an appointment with a GI doctor to make sure that there was not any thing going on with my GI tract that could possibly cause my slight anemia, (I had a colonoscopy that was normal 2 years ago.). I also have a follow up with my family doctor in a week to insure that my labs were all back. I swa the orthopedic doctor on Monday about my leg and was told to keep some moist heat on it when I was sitting down. He also gave me an excuse to miss the jury selection I was to attend on the 13th of February.. So ladies, take heed about some of these warnings that you see and read about.. It could happen to you in a flash when you least expect it. I was lucky as it could have been much, much worst than it was. I hope that all of you have/had a wonderful valentines with that special person in your life. Also, Remember that every one is Irish on St Patrick’s Day and it does not have to come out of a bottle. Be sure to celebrate that day with your favorite Lass or Lassie. Keep it safe and don’t eat too much green grits, or corn beef and cabbage and don’t drink too much green beer either. Yours Barbara Marie Davidson. The Adventures of Judy Sometimes By: Judy Danials A little culture Well, its been a while since my Sundress group has had a bit of culture, but last night we were treated to some by one of our very own. Our friend Christine had a special event last night unveiling her self published book, Wiener Dogs & Other Muses | Poetry by Christine Hoper, she also writes a blog called Red River Girl. The event took place at another friend of ours place of business called D|K Custom Framing @ Gallery 14, a quaint little space in downtown Fargo right across from the fire station. Several of us met at the VFW for a cocktail beforehand and were treated to a plate full of brownies with chocolate frosting by our favorite bartender Andrea (or Andy as we call her). I'm not so sure they go so well with Captain Morgan...but are you really going to turn down a 19 brownie, lol. The VFW and DK's are several blocks a part and with the winds gusting at 40mph and raining we decided to drive over, which ended up being a big mistake. After not finding a parking spot we ended up hoofing it anyway and needless to say it didn't do anything for my hair. Its one of the few times I wish I actually wore a wig, lol. When we arrived we did our best to help each other put ourselves together before going in the front door. I'm glad I did because there were already about 20 people seated for the start of the event which was set up facing the entrance we had just came through. OK, call me vane, but my hair is a very important part of me feeling comfortable when going out dressed. I guess I had nothing to worry about as soon as we entered our hostess Denise and our lady of honor gave us big hugs and thanked us for coming. I was also greeted by several other familiar faces I hadn't seen for quiet sometime. As the event got going I quickly settled into a calmness that now has become second nature at such events. Who knew a guy dressed as a women would have no problems fitting right into a room full of people. As the event was winding down several other lady friends started to inquire about plans for the rest of the evening. It was decided that we would continue the merriment at our home bar Duffys. Once there we shoved a couple tables together to accomadate our rather large group and we chatted the evening away. Geez, I really do have the best friends in the world. As I sit here writing this I am at our cabin with a roaring fire going waiting for our "girl only" weekend to start. This could get fun, I'll report in on Sunday sometime and fill you in on the details. Judy (It looks like a jeans and sweatshirt kind of weekend) sometimes 20 Tasi’s Musings Greetings from Merida. Most of you are familiar with aloe vera which is used extensively in cosmetics, particularly on facial tissues where it is promoted as a moisturizer and/or anti-irritant to reduce chafing of the nose of users suffering hay-fever or cold. Did you know that aloe came from a cactus, or so I thought so, until a little research told me otherwise. It’s actually a succulent plant, a family of which cacti are members. It grows wildly throughout most of the southern Border States. throughout most of the southern Border States. Why all this interest in cacti….well this plant is growing in my backyard patio and it turns out to be an aloe plant – looked like a cactus to me with those sharp pointy, spiny tips. So in walks my Spanish teacher. We usually sit in the outdoor patio to do our Spanish lessons and this plant is growing next to the patio as a garden decoration. She burned herself this one particular morning and asked if she could cut off one of the plant tips. I said “sure”. So she proceeds to cut off a tip and squeeze the nectar onto her burnt finger. Almost within seconds the burn stopped hurting. Seems this plant has great medicinal value even though scientists say there is little scientific evidence for the claim. The Mexican folks here would disagree. It’s used widely as a burn ointment. Other uses include products such as makeup, tissues, moisturizers, soaps, sunscreens, incense, shaving cream or shampoos and get this, extracts of aloe vera include the dilution of semen for the artificial fertilization of sheep, as a fresh food preservative, or for water conservation in small farms. Seems I have a readymade pharmacy in my backyard. In the News Another Bathroom Bill. A prominent Republican lawmaker in Arizona wants to link public bathroom use to birth certificates in what civil rights advocates are calling the nation’s toughest anti-transgender measure. The bill would require people to use public restrooms, dressing rooms or locker rooms associated with the sex listed on their birth certificate or face six months in jail. What in the world is going on in Arizona? 21 My Kind of Ball Player. 6-foot-6-inch, 220-pound Gabrielle Ludwig joined the Mission College Lady Saints as a mid-season walk-on and became the first transsexual to play college hoops as both a man and a woman. Nicknamed "Big Sexy" Now every woman’s program in the nation is searching for transsexuals to add to their rosters. New Look doesn’t want to look, another fashion store disaster. A young trans woman was barred from using the changing rooms at New Look. The store chain management says their policies were misunderstood. According to them ‘New Look welcomes transgendered customers. In stores which have regular transgendered customers, store management allows full access to the changing rooms, but encourages trans people to make regular appointments to accommodate their needs. ‘Arrangements are made at the discretion of the store management.’ Although this issue is less volatile than the bathroom issue, it still happens. Actually. read the comments from the women. Trans women and crossdressers do need to use discretion so as not to make other women uncomfortable. When I first started shopping in stores enfemme, I’d call ahead and ask if it was OK to shop there and use the changing rooms. That became unnecessary after a while but if the store is busy, make friends with the manager and be guided accordingly. Portland Bar Discriminates. Life can be tough when you’re trans. Oregon's labor commissioner has filed formal charges of unlawful discrimination against a north Portland bar. The investigation into the Twilight Room Annex, formerly known as the P Club, began last August. The Bureau of Labor and Industries said the bar's owner, Chris Penner, left phone messages asking a group of transgender customers to stop visiting his business. The group, known as the Rose City T-Girls, said they had been going to the P Club on Friday nights for two years. No outcome yet, but this one will likely have a positive result for the trans community Charlie White's 'Teen And Transgender Comparative Study' Pairs Girls And Trans Women. Stunning photos from a 2008 project by artist Charlie White pair teen girls with their transgender adult female doppelgängers. Titled the "Teen and Transgender Comparative Study," White's project is "a correlation of two stages of transformation, pairing teen girls with like adult male-to-female" transgender women. Most interesting. 22 Brene Brown studies human connection -- our ability to empathize, belong, and love. In a poignant, funny talk at TEDxHouston, she shares a deep insight from her research, one that sent her on a personal quest to know her as well as to understand humanity. A talk to share Books and Movies More books than ever. Now in their twenty-fifth year, the Lambda Literary Awards celebrate achievement in lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) writing for books published in 2012. Winners will be announced during a ceremony on Monday evening, June 3, 2013, Lambda Literary Foundation set a new record in 2013 for both the number of LGBT books submitted for Lammy consideration, 687, and the number of publishers participating, 332. This beats the record-setting numbers in 2012 of 600 titles by over 250 publishers and is the fourth consecutive year of growth in submissions and publishers. Bob's New Suit" explores identity, gender transitioning. “Bob’s New Suit” has its L.A. theatrical premiere on Friday, March 22, at the Arena Cinema in Hollywood, CA 90028. The DVD release will be on March 26 and the VOD release will be on April 8. Click HERE to reserve your copy. The Switch Meet Sü. Last week she was an upwardly-mobile software manager, at a place where her coworkers all knew her as Erwin. Life was normal enough and good enough. When Sü came out as a transsexual, she promptly lost her job. Her apartment followed. About half of the team members are trans* -identified themselves. The show’s content is often irreverent and quirky, but it’s born from intimate awareness and lived experience. The folks working behind the scenes share a lot in common with the characters in the show: a group populated by queers, activists, trans* individuals, kinksters, weirdoes, and East Van rabble-rousers. Mexican actress Kate del Castillo shines in K-11, the new prison thriller from director Jules Stewart (the mother of Twilight darling Kristen Stewart and her brother Cameron, who both have cameos in the film). Del Castillo plays a transgender woman named Mousey, who rules her dormitory with an iron, manicured fist. After a successful run on the festival circuit, K-11 is now screening in theaters and available On Demand. 'Return of the Prodigal Son" a full length motion picture/ documentary that explores the faith base belief that gets transgenders through such a life changing ordeal, up close interviews, straight up street talk with the public, a movie that takes a hard look at the science, psychological, medical and spiritual aspects of the phenomenon that seems to be sweeping through the heart, mind and soul of humanity. 23 Fashion and Beauty A few weeks ago, a Glamour reader wrote in asking for specific advice on how exactly a woman can know if her bra "fits." As in, what should it look like? Where the band should be placed? How should the straps fit? Well, ladies, Glamour responded as we check in with Liz Smith, Wacoal's bra expert, and got the inside scoop. "A great-fitting bra should lift, support, contain, and be comfortable," she says. "If you're looking in a mirror, all of your breast tissue should be contained in the cups, and the underwire should completely clear your breast tissue. The center of the bra, called a bridge, gore, or center front, should touch your chest wall. Your straps should stay up on your shoulders once adjusted. The back of the bra needs to sit low and snug on your back to anchor the bra. If the back of the bra rides up, the girls are going to head south in the front." Smith also suggests the Elbow Test. "Stand sideways to a mirror and bend your arm at the elbow with you palm facing down. Your bust should be centered between your shoulder and elbow in the middle of your arm." Occasionally I’m asked about styles (surprise!) and what is current and looks good. I’m a hugh fan of peplum, particularly for us apple-shaped gals because it helps create an illusion of a waistline. So when I ran across this advertisement from Fashion to Figure for a deep dive textured peplum dress, I just had to share it. It’s sexy too And then don’t miss Glamour’s new video channel. Lots of fun stuff to watch here and you’ll get your fashion fix for the week. Humor A husband and wife fantasy. Can you guess the ending/ The 1920s look from CD Mira. Do you love it or not? Apart we're fashionable. Together we're The Stylish. Join the best dressed social network! The Stylish is a premiere YouTube channel owned by Magical Elves, the producers behind Project Runway and Top Chef. It is the leading online source for fashion, beauty and personal style videos and is affiliated with InStyle Magazine. And while you are checking the channel, watch the latest episode of Willam’s Beatdown Willam always says he’ll put anything in his mouth, but now it’s time for him to prove it! On this episode of Willam’s Beatdown, you can enjoy glue eating, a crotch shot and the baby food challenge. All the while beating down PrankvsPrank, ItsKingsleyBitch, EleventhGorgeous and Piink Sparkles. Happy Friday Bitches!! 24 Cat Woman Candy sings Help Yourself To My Lips. Terrible video but the outfit is great. Just for Fun This older couple playing an impromptu piano duet https://www.youtube.com/watch? v=TZwdtwi5ngI is fantastic and a must watch. This brief view of Swan Lake performed by the Great Chinese State Circus is undoubtly one of the most incredible performances of this classic opera ever. Be prepared to be amazed. And lastly, for those of us that love to sail and if you have read this far, this is a real treat, the Oracle racing in San Francisco bay with speeds up to 40 MPH. The film is 23 minutes long but if you love sailing, you’ll love this. So Until next month Second Cover Girl Contest Coming A suggestion was made that we have a separate cover girl contest for those of us girls who were over the age of 65. On March 22nd I created a poll asking the age of the members. While at the time I write this is early in that poll it seems that 55% of us who responded are over the age of 60. As a result starting with the May issue there will be a second cover girl contest that will be for those of us who are over the age of 60. While the regular cover girl contest will be open to all members regardless of age, the second contest will only be for those over 60 years of age. Girls who are 60+ may enter both contest if they wish. Watch for a new set of cover girl rules to come this month. 25 Humor I AM A FATHER A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards. The little boy asked why he wore his collar that way. The man, who was a priest, said, " I am a Father." The little boy replied "My Daddy doesn't wear his collar like that." The priest looked up from his book and answered "I am the Father of many." The boy said, "My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn't wear his collar that way. The priest getting impatient said "I am the Father of hundreds," and went back to reading his book. The little boy sat quietly...but on leaving the bus he leaned over and said, "Well. maybe you should wear your pants backwards instead of your collar." 26 Angels In The Centerfold Abby Lauren Bobbie Vance Veronica 27 Tammy Trueheart Stephanie Monroe Lena Gibbson 28 Francine G e r r y S e v i g n y Jan Brown 29 Holly Kaye Denise DeMann Barbara Marie 30 Mellissalynn’s Tips & Tricks Hello, ladies, and welcome to spring! Not that it FEELS like spring yet, but the calendar says it’s so, anyway. I hope it’s found you ready to start showing bare legs and feet! I hope you had a good month! Mine was a mixed bag, to say the least. On the professional side of things, I learned a lot of new things and am steadily getting better at my chosen new profession. I attended America’s Beauty Show, which is a big hair and beauty convention in Chicago. It was held at McCormick Place, and was HUGE! I dropped a lot of money there, but I have a lot to show for it too. Here’s a picture of one of the new styles I’ve been working on in school. You’ll see more of this in one of my tips, where I explain how to create the look. I’m really proud of how this looks! The personal side of things wasn’t so good. My son went down to house-sit for my sister-inlaw at the beginning of March. Well, against my wishes, his girlfriend/fiancée joined him there. So one evening I’m at home getting ready to eat dinner when I get a collect call. It’s my son, calling from the county jail! It seems the girlfriend decided to go on an unpaid-for shopping spree and tucked about $200 worth of items into her purse. My son and she had split up to go to different areas, and he had no knowledge of what she’d done. They were both arrested; thankfully, his prior and hopefully future Navy time got him a JAG lawyer to please his case. He ended up receiving, through having done absolutely nothing wrong, 40 hours of community service and a two-year ban from Wal-Mart. Talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time… Anyway! If any of you have a horror story about being arrested to share, or a good story about a hair show, or just want to chat, my e-mail is always open. In case anyone has forgotten, the address is [email protected]. I really want to hear what you think of my styling pictures especially, so feel free to write me! @@@@@@@@@@ So we have this neat thing we do on Saturdays at school called Princess Parties. What that entails is, a group of young ladies, usually tweens or even a little younger, are brought in for like a birthday party or something. They get a hairstyle (usually a bit of braiding or an updo), their fingers and toes polished, some makeup, and then a small party with cake. Well, I had a young lady a couple of weeks ago who was the birthday girl of the party, and wanted something special in her hair. I had just the thing, thankfully! I had gone to a thrift store and found a bunch of very pretty costume brooches that I picked up for a quarter a pop. I bought them for exactly what I used one for, to decorate a hairstyle. I put the brooch, a nicelyshaped diamond affair studded with rhinestones, right in the center of the young lady’s coif. She was ecstatic! Her mother liked it as well, enough so that I got a $5 tip. 31 This idea isn’t just for younger girls, as I’ve seen plenty of adult women wearing items in their hair as well. So, if you want to add a little bit of bling to your look, here’s an easy and inexpensive idea. You can find brooches like I’m talking about at your local dollar store. Give it a shot! @@@@@@@@@@@ As I stated in my intro to the column, it’s spring. This is a good time to go through your makeup and sort out the stuff that’s expired, you don’t use, or just needs replaced. Remember, mascara only has a shelf life of three months once it’s open! @@@@@@@@@@@ You may have heard about beauty balms in the magazines and on the news. Well, while I was at the hair show, I found someone selling them, and purchased a tube. I’ll be reporting on how it works for me soon, so stay tuned to this column for more developments! @@@@@@@@@@@ We all crave the bright-eyed look, girls. Fake it with a sumptuous set of dramatic lashes! Thanks to several revolutionary new mascaras, no false lashes are required, although they can be used to pump up the volume on those special nights out. Just sweep two coats of mascara onto lashes, making sure to comb lashes between applications. For even greater effect, sweep a third coat on just the outer lashes, creating a wing effect. You’ll love it! @@@@@@@@@@@ According to many professional makeup artists, the most underrated element of a beautiful makeup look is the eyebrows. The shape, including where your brow arches, where it's wide and where it's thin, is the key. Here's how to give yourself an eyebrow makeover. Look at the inside corner of your eye, where it's closest to your nose. Pick up a pencil, a makeup brush or a ruler - anything long, straight and slender. From the inside corner of your eye, follow a line straight up. If you've got an eyeliner or eyebrow pencil, mark where the line crosses your eyebrow. Do the same from the inner corner of your other eye. If you have hair inside the two marks, you’re close to a unibrow situation, which is to be avoided at all costs! Pluck all that hair out, but be careful not to over-pluck. If your eyebrows don't reach the marks above the inner corners of your eyes, then you need to fill those parts in with a pencil. Take your pencil, makeup brush or ruler and hold it against the outer corner of one of your nostrils. Hold it at an angle so that it crosses the bottom outer corner of your iris. (Not the eye itself, but the outer edge of your iris when you're looking straight ahead.) Follow the line upward until it crosses your eyebrow. That's where your eyebrow arch needs to be at its highest, the peak of the arch. To create an arch where there is none, gently pluck hairs from the brow 32 bone. Always pluck from the bottom and not the top (with the exception of removing strays from the top of the brow). The arch should start coming down immediately after this peak. Taking the pencil, makeup brush or ruler to your nose again, line it up at the outer edge of the nostril and let the line go to the edge of the eye and continue up until it crosses the brow area. That's where your brow should end. Try using taupe eye shadow to fill in any sparse areas and give an arch a natural-looking emphasis. Even very light-skinned blondes should use taupe; it will define the brow without washing it out. Redheads, or anyone with a reddish tone in the skin, should choose a taupe or neutral color with a little amber in it, and dark-skinned people should try some brown shades until they get the right one. As always, your first and best bet is to get your brows shaped first by an expert, at least for the first time (soon, that will be me!). After that, it's easy for you to just follow the shape the stylist has given you. @@@@@@@@@@@ The upside down braid. That’s the style I showed you at the beginning of the column. Well, it’s really easy to create and can be very versatile. This works best on longer hair, at least shoulderlength. It can be done on a shoulder-length wig as well. Gather your hair into a ponytail, preferably around the nape of the neck, but can be all the way up to the occipital area of your head. Create a hole in the hair just above the ponytail holder (a.k.a. the hair band). Gather the hair below the holder and pull it through the hole. This will give the hair a twist. At this point, you can do several things with the hair. You can leave it in a simple ponytail. You can braid the hair below the holder, as I showed in the earlier picture. You can create an updo with it. It’s one of the more versatile styles I’ve seen, and extremely easy to create. Have fun with it! @@@@@@@@@@@ All right, so you didn’t listen to Mellissa’s germ-phobic tips and got a zit. You squeezed it, and now you have a blotchy red mark. As a soon-to-be esthetician, I can tell you that improper squeezing pushes the cellular debris (a.k.a. the pus) in a pimple deeper into the pore, resulting in inflammation and redness. To soothe and heal a red mark, dab on a one percent cortisone cream at bedtime. To hide the mark, 33 dab it with a green concealer stick; the green will counteract the red and hide the spot better. Dot on some foundation. Of course, the best thing to do is to resist the urge to pop a pimple. Instead, use a cleanser containing salicylic acid, which exfoliates the dead cells that clog pores @@@@@@@@@@@ Girls, nails have issues. From breaks to stains, tears to chips, nail nuisances can strike at the most inopportune times. Well, here are some quick repairs that you can do in the nick of time, at minimal costs. It only takes minutes to work makeover magic. With these five tips and a few inexpensive supplies (polish remover, bleach, cuticle oil, plastic wrap, nail glue and a tea bag), you’ll have amazing hands! 1. Yellow Nails — Soak your nails in one-fourth cup of bleach mixed with one-half cup of water. 2. Not Quite Dry — Coat wet nails with cuticle oil and cover your nails with plastic wrap. 3. Polish Smudge — Moisten the pad of your finger with polish remover and tap lightly to smooth it out. 4. Chipped Polish — Moisten your finger with polish remover and quickly swipe over the chipped area to smooth out the edges. 5. Broken Nail — If the break isn’t too low, carefully cut the nail, file it, and trim the other nails so they’re of equal length. For a big break (one that’s in the nail bed), apply a couple of drops of nail glue to the surface of the nail. Let set and hold the break in place for about a minute. Reapply glue and cover the nail with a piece of tea bag or tissue. Let dry, and then buff excess off. @@@@@@@@@@@ One of the biggest giveaways for a T-girl is her nose. Not the size or the shape, but the contents. Men get humongous nose hairs; women just don’t. So if you’re going out for a night on the town en femme, remember to trim your nose hairs! It isn’t hard and will help in your feminine presentation. @@@@@@@@@@@ Being a woman is more than just looking like one. You need to be able to talk like a woman, especially with other women. This isn’t a tip on changing your voice; that’s outside my purview for this column. What I want to talk about is the content of your conversation. Can you spot a Manolo Blahnik from a Jimmy Choo? What does Prada mean to you? This is what I’m talking about. Become knowledgeable in the areas of makeup, beauty and fashion. 34 There is a lot more to all of these subjects than most men could ever imagine. If you want to present yourself as a woman, invest the time in learning about these things. Believe me, it’s worth it. A good place to start is the beauty section of the library. Even before I started school I spent a lot of time in this section learning and reading up on stuff. Also, the women’s magazines are almost required reading. I subscribe to Glamour, Lucky, and Allure, to name a few, and used to subscribe to several more. I find Allure in particular to be helpful, as there is almost always a pullout beauty guide for one topic or another. Read whatever works best for you, but please remember that other women are watching and waiting to talk to you… @@@@@@@@@@@ This tip is for the girls, like me, who are fortunate enough to have real hair to play with. Dust your hair! Go to a hairstylist for a mini-trim called a "dusting" (named for the fine dust of hair left on the floor afterward).What this does is clears up split ends and improves your hair’s health. Not only do split ends look scraggly, but they can also travel further up the hair strands faster if they aren't nipped in the bud. That just causes more breakage and loss of length, which is sad for all concerned. @@@@@@@@@@@ So you’ve got chapped lips, but you have a big to-do to go to and want pretty lips Here’s a way to help your lips become healthy and gorgeous at the same time. Apply a coat of lip balm to your lips first, then apply the lipstick. The balm will help treat your lips and at the same time helps the lipstick stay on longer. Win-win! @@@@@@@@@@@ Stake out salon training nights. Many top hair salons offer low-cost cuts on training nights, where student stylists work their magic (under the close watch of their more senior colleagues). You can get great work done for a fraction of the cost, and have a lot of fun too! @@@@@@@@@@@ Was that really the end of the column? Already? Wow…how time flies when you’re having fun, huh? Go forth and enjoy April, sisters! Wear the pretty springtime dresses and peep-toe sandals, and stuff! And don’t forget the cameras, because we always want to see pictures…! If you have pictures to share, or you want to talk about spring, or time, or any other subject, once again, feel free to write me at [email protected] . I love to hear from my readers! 35 New Yahoo Group Girls, Tasi Zuriach has created a new Yahoo group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/thetgwoman This group offers support to the transgender woman and her spouse or significant other as they chose. Where ever you are on the transgender spectrum, searching, dreaming, experimenting, cross dresser, transsexual, part-time, full-time, or transitioned, you are welcome here. We also encourage members from all around the world to participate so we can learn the many different ways that we express ourselves globally. Our purpose is to explore this wonderful and magical world of femininity and the ssues that all of us face in this journey to enlightenment. This is a nonsexual discussion group so be mindful that you don’t cross that boundary To join, you should have a (Yahoo) profile and an appropriate picture for a lady, preferably a facial shot, and your name and age, and no connection to inappropriate sites 36 Rhonda’s Ramblings Games I share a few games recently "invented"/played, which I will entitle Games for the (Im)mature Cross-dresser Try (or avoid), at your own risk: 1) Is it Real or is it Mama Rex?: In bubba mode, take a fem photo for mounting at a frame shop. Ask the clerk if it resembles you. My saleslady thoughtfully looked back and forth several times between me and the photo, finally concluding “Yes, it does; are you related??" Muster courage to reply "I'll give you 4 choices... it is either 1) my daughter; 2) my cousin; 3) my twin sister; or 4) me. What do you think?" 2) Red Carpet Treatment: Paint toes bright red, then shop for carpet. My salesman invited me to take off my shoes to test the softness of the fabric. Forgetting the polish, I took off both shoes and socks, surprising myself more than him. My face turned a brighter red than my toes as I hopped behind a display rack, obviously not unnoticed, to put socks back on! Poorly played! I am sure any of you could improve on this game! Thoughts welcome! 3) Panty roulette: This is a simple game, requiring only a ceiling fan and his and hers panties. Each player spears his/her panties on separate blades. Begin fan rotation. Last panty on the blades wins. Extra points for spiking bed or lamp posts, ears, or other inviting targets. Points for longest toss. Game set-up can also be fun… take turns tossing garments onto the blades…. Not as easy as you might think! But if you get the “hang of it", try with blades rotating. Be prepared for whiplash, as blades often return items to sender. If adventurous, try bras. But be prepared for entanglement of game pieces and appropriate explanations to maintenance crew required to fix your fan! I may try this one before my carpet salesman visits to take room measurements. WARNING: If you have as much fun as me, be prepared to pay amusement tax. 37 “THE RAMBLINGS OF A MARRIED TGIRL.” Part 2- So I came out to my wife, what next? By: Stephanie Rene I hope this article finds all my cool, chick friends around the world doing well. I came out to the wife on January 2, 2013 as detailed in Part 1 and I’m continuing the saga with what has happened since. Needless to say, it has been a roller coaster of emotions for my wife, but a huge relief of a burden I had carried for too many years. For the first couple weeks following my coming out to my wife, we had almost daily conversations about my “girl” side and the whole tg/cd/tv/ts community. My wife’s feelings drifted between being jealous about anyone who might find me attractive, buy me drinks or pay me compliments to concern about losing me. I felt tremendous relief in her commitment to save our relationship and desire to work through this. However, she also looked my desire to dress and be a woman initially as some type of hobby or fetish. After numerous conversations, many times with one of us in tears, it finally hit her that this transgendered side of me was something very emotional. When that light bulb went off, her understanding and acceptance started to improve. I’ve printed and given her articles written by other wives. These have helped her learn more, however, she has resisted offers to meet other couples or attend any conferences. I’m still working on getting her together with some other spouses in a social setting. While I’m a lot more open with all the aspects of being Stephanie, there are still awkward moments. I go out at least once a week and before leaving, I find myself explaining where I’m going, what I’m doing and when I’ll be home. During the outing, I always get a text message from her requesting a photo of me. So, I’ll have someone take the photo and then I text back to her. This seems to help her somehow. In the second week following coming out to her, I finally got her to sit down and go thru photos of myself on Facebook. I could see the shock and fascination on her face. She studied the photos and was amazed that she could not recognize the man she knows in any of them. So I took it as a compliment that I “transform” well. On January 25th, she went out with me for the first time. We went to a very nice bar and grill where everyone knows “Stephanie” very well. I’ve been going to this place for many years and have a closer relationship with the staff, which always includes a greeting with a hug. Funny, when I walk in the bartender will ask if I want my usual which consists of a glass of red tempranillo wine. We were treated like royalty with an excellent dinner and a complimentary dessert. All of the staff made a point of stopping by to visit and be introduced to my wife. This was also an eye opening experience for her because of how nice, friendly and accepting everybody was, regardless of where we went around the city. After dinner, I took her to see a drag show. I don’t go to drag shows very often anymore, but thought it was a safe bet. Since I’ve been going out in this area since 1989, I know most of the 38 drag queens personally having seen their shows and dropped hundreds of dollars on tips for their dances. The performers made a point of stopping by to say hello to me and meet my “companion” for the evening. I’m blessed with having a very attractive Hispanic wife and they made sure to let her know that she was beautiful. Unexpectedly, a very good tgirl friend and her spouse showed up at this club. My friend was in boy drab and had stopped in only to wish someone happy birthday. However, it was an opportunity for my wife to meet another married “girl” and spouse. Future dinner plans were made with this couple as the two wives seemed to hit it off with their short, but pleasant conversation. Needless to say, the first outing went very well and allowed her to have a much better understanding of Stephanie and our community. The big test came on February 8th, when we attended to a huge “Fetish Party” at a night club in Scottsdale. We both got dolled up in pretty corsets, short skirts, fishnet stockings and boots for the night. I had arranged for us to be with 5 other friends in a VIP booth with our own private seating and cocktail service. We arrived about 8:30 pm and stayed until closing time at 2 am, dancing most of the night. I knew lots of people at the event, including many other members of the transgender community. All made a point of visiting with my wife, making her feel very welcome. Here is a photo of me on the dance floor at the event, after removing the corset. I’m happy to report she had a great time at the event despite suffering from the “bottle” flu the next day. I made sure to drink very little and enjoyed my time dancing with her as well as visiting with all my friends at this quarterly event. Again, I’m able to report another successful outing with my wife. I would have to say the most difficult issue for me to date is the lack of emotional nourishment for my girl side. This side seeks being loved, accepted and always occupies a great amount of my time. It is the part of me from which many of my emotions come as well as my desire to give, help others and my tenderness. I can already see that this will be the long term test for our relationship. I do feel blessed for how everything has transpired over the past two months with my wife and the effort she is making to be supportive of me. Frankly, it is a bit of a shock, but shows what the commitment of love between two people can accomplish. My heart goes out to all those who continue to suppress or hide their femininity. It is a difficult cross to carry. I will continue to write about my journey. If you ever feel the need to talk or ask questions, email me at: [email protected]. Hugs! Stephanie Rene 39 Your Handbag and You – the Rest of the Story Tasi Zuriack Reprinted from TG Reporter There are many different approaches to choosing the right bag, and Tasi explores yet some more. Just recently Denae Doyle talked about the perfect handbag for the transgender woman and helped to demystify the question on which handbag to carry. But like the infamous commentator Paul Harvey used to say, now “Here is the rest of the story.” It’s more than which color makes your outfit pop or what length is best, or its size. We know large girls should not carry small purses, and large purses should not be carried on the hip making us look like a buffalo. Now I don’t suspect that too many of us are carrying Louis Vitton or Prada bags. More likely the bag would have come from a thrift shop or big box store like Target - up to and including some of the nicer mid-range brands like Coach or Fossel. But for sure our bag, like our shoes, reflects our personality. After all, you don’t leave home without it, and if you have bought a quality bag it will be with you for many years. When I first started crossdressing in public, my wife gave me her old -- but still in good condition -- black Coach bag in a classic design. It's still my go-to bag when there’s not a special occasion (and even then sometimes). Then I have a straw bag for the summer, and a bright red slouchy-style bag when I want to be noticed -- or make a fashion statement! So for sure, there is psychology involved in how we wear our favorite accessory (with no disrespect to you shoe buffs, but handbags represent 70% of sales at luxury goods houses). Carolyn Asome wrote about what our handbag says about us in a recent London Times article "they’re more than fashion items for holding things." She even makes a case for taste in bags being genetic, otherwise “Why are alligator leathers and jeweled styles favored by Arabs, why do the Chinese adore the color red and a bucketful of logos, and why are the Russians drawn to bags made from the softest nappa leathers (understated perhaps, but also exorbitantly priced)?” Bags are not just a fashion item in which we carry keys, phone, wallet, and sometimes a complete makeup bag. According to personal stylist Annabel Hodin, handbags have become sartorial semiotic, a social signifier which is even more revealing than our choice of shoes, as well as “the accent that foretells the changes seasonally.” They have such significance in our wardrobe that one Crown Court judge in the UK lamented “men don’t understand their 40 significance and that handbag theft should not be trivialized”, proof positive of their importance. as a "CPS", Certified Personal Shopper. And as we enter a new season, women are poised to shop. Even in these recessionary times. Handbags have never been more popular. The clinical psychologist Anita Abrams has a curious theory that harks back to mankind’s hunting/gathering stereotypes: “After many years observing the most successful presents I have given, I am baffled to note that boys and men tend to like anything that is vaguely phallic — umbrellas, pens or plastic swords — while girls love things that are womb-like, such as bags, baskets, things they can put things in.” If you believe that your choice of a handbag is based on sensible criteria of form and function, you may want to think again. “Obviously it has to be practical,” Abrams says, “but the outside of your bag says plenty about the inside of our hearts. In earlier days, your choice spoke of conformity, now it is talking about your individuality.” But it’s even more than that. It may be subconscious what if we told you that the way you hold your bag can tell us a little something about you? Now not everyone agrees with this, but we spoke with body-language expert Patti Wood to shed a little insight onto what it all means. Now, take a look at the graphic. What are you telling the world? According to Wood, there are 10 distinct ways to hold your bag. Let’s take a look at the diagram. The Twofer — You hold your strapless bag in front of you coyly and cross your legs. You’re shy and defensive. The Schlepper — You have tons of bags hanging off of you randomly stuffed with belongings. You’re disorganized, spaced out, and exhausted. The Hands-Free — You wear a purse with a long strap and let it hang in front of what you’re wearing. Apparently, you’re youthful and nerdy. The Arm-Crook Hook — You let your bag hang from your elbow joint, wrist flopping. You’re super famous and your bag 41 probably cost a fortune. You’re just plain better than everyone. The Baguette — Your arm cradles your purse like some warm French bread. You’re utilitarian: it’s what’s in the bag that counts. The Third Arm Drape — Your purse hangs from a long strap down one side of your body. Different from the "Hands-Free" look because it hangs by your side, not your front. You lack awareness and control of your world. The Armpit Vice — You’ve got a clutch shoved awkwardly in your armpit. Not good people, not good. You’re trying too hard and it isn’t working. That’s what straps are for. The “I’ve Got a Bag Bitch” — Someone else is carrying your purse. You’re way too important for carrying stuff. The Briefcase — You’ve ditched the strap and carry your bag at your side by the handle. You're all business. The Thumb to Pit — Your tote-like bag hangs over one shoulder, and your fingers clutch the strap at your armpit. This is apparently very Carrie Bradshaw. You’re a street-smart city girl who knows to protect her stuff. Is there any validity to all of these? There’s one woman whose style has been analyzed in forensic detail, Kate Middleton. Vogue recently published a “Katepedia” in their January issue, revealing that Kate holds her purse in front with two hands the majority (48 per cent) of the time, making her a “Twofer.” Is Kate shy and defensive? Well, she is hounded by media 24/7, so perhaps Woods is on to something. However, my wife’s style, and probably mine too, is the third arm drape, and I can assure you that lacking awareness and control of the world is not our style, quite the contrary. Still. It’s fun to watch the women in the street and at the mall. So go ahead and carry your bag as you wish. We won’t judge you, but not so with Woods. 42 Colorful spring dresses $30 and under By Christine Aebischer | Woman's Day (Photo by: Kmart; JCP; Avon ) Whether you're looking forward to outdoor picnics or a little getaway, these promising picks are sure to flatter your figure, style and budget. From floral frocks to striped sensations, a sophisticated spring wardrobe is just a click away. (Photo: JCP)Flirty Frock The colorful print and ruffles create a relaxed look, while the v-neck and belt ensure you won’t lose your shape. Short-Sleeve Print Dress, $30; JCP.com Sizes 4-12 available. (Photo: JCP)Bold Bombshell The bright floral print attracts attention, while the higher neckline and longer sleeves keep the look tasteful. Self-Belt Dress, $30; JCP.com Sizes 4-16 available. (Photo: Avon) Darling Draping Conceal a tummy with the strategic draping on this flattering sheath. Its solid color makes it versatile enough to wear in multiple ways. Drape Escape Dress, $20; Avon.com Sizes 6 - 28W available. 43 (Photo: Kmart)Heavenly Hemline This high-low dress shows just enough leg, and the flowy fabric and abstract print hide imperfections. Sofia by Sofia Vergara Hi Lo Dress, $21; Kmart.com Sizes S- XL available. (Photo: Old Navy) Sweet Scoop The relaxed neckline, short sleeves and muted design create a casual feel that makes this dress a great choice for any day. Women’s Printed Dress, $25; OldNavy.com Sizes XS-XXL available. (Photo: Wal-Mart) Floral Frenzy This lightweight cotton dress has a pretty, feminine silhouette. Bonus: There are adjustable ties and an elastic waistband for added comfort. Bella Bird Seaside Village Woven Dress, $17.98; Walmart.com Sizes S-XXL available. (Photo: JCP) Pretty Pleats The light chiffon and swingy skirt keep you from feeling restricted in this dress. To let the pop of color at the bottom stand out, the rest of the dress is covered in a sweet, subtle print. Worthington Border Print Pleat Dress, $30; JCP.com Sizes 6-14 available. 44 (Photo: Old Navy)Denim Delight This hassle-free dress makes denim dazzle, and the delicate pin-dot pattern adds a softer touch. Women’s Pin-Dot Chambray Dress, $15; OldNavy.com Sizes XS - XXL available. (Photo: Avon) Ruffle Remix The slight ruffling down the middle of this dress and on the sleeves create a slimming effect. More figure-flattering help comes from the stretchy fabric, which accentuates your shape. Frilled with Excitement Dress, $20; Avon.com Sizes 6 - 28W available. (Photo: Wal-Mart) Wrap Wonder This figure-flattering jersey dress can be worn with a blazer or solo to work, or dressed up for a night out. George Career Essentials Jersey Wrap Dress, $18; Walmart.com Sizes S - XXL available. (Photo: Kmart) Gracious Gathering Extra material at the bust line coupled with a v-neck works to accentuate a smaller bust in this flirty number. Sofia by Sofia Vergara Gathered Front Dress, $17.50; Kmart.com Sizes XS-XL available. 45 (Photo: JCP) Comfortable Classic Feel great while looking smart in this faux wrap dress. Plus, the bold print adds a modern touch. Liz Claiborne Faux Wrap Dress, $30; JCP.com Sizes S-XL available. How To Look Hot In Feminine Lingerie ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Lucille Sorella is a GG (genetic girl) who teaches crossdressers, transsexuals, and transgender females how to look, act, and feel like real women. Her goal is to help Twomen express their inner and outer femininity and increase their confidence as women. She has a professional background in fashion, beauty, dance, and natural healing and has been working with the transgender community for the past 12 years. Her website is loaded with useful information and is located at http:// www.flat2fem.com/index1.html . 46 Whether you are an occasional crossdresser or live as a woman full time, lingerie is a great way to connect with your femme self. How can you NOT feel totally girly in a pretty lace bra and panties? But let’s face it …it’s hard to hide your flaws when you are practically naked! Here’s how to look HOT in feminine lingerie (even if you have a beer belly and manly hips)! 1. Get the right fit Nothing will destroy your image faster than saggy bra cups or too-tight panties creating a “muffin top”. It’s impossible to look good in lingerie that doesn’t fit right. Your bra and panties should fit snug, but should never dig into your skin. (That’s how you get ugly bulges.) Be sure to check your bra cups – they should fit smoothly over your breasts or breast forms. Wrinkled bra cups means you need a smaller cup size. Need help with your size? Check out these Victoria’s Secret calculators to determine your correct bra and panty sizes. 2. Flatter your shape The number one secret to looking hot in lingerie is to hide your flaws (like a big belly) and highlight your assets (like sexy long legs). Here are the most flattering pieces for crossdressers and transgender women: Babydoll lingerie – Babydoll lingerie is sweet and sexy and best of all, it’s great for hiding an ample belly. Ruffled panties – Do you wish you had bigger hips? Ruffled panties feminize your figure by adding fullness to the hips. Kimono robe – Slip on a sexy kimono to hide broad shoulders. Look for a sheer style so you can disguise your upper body while still showing some skin. 3. Complement your skin tone Color has a dramatic effect on your appearance (and your mood) so choose wisely. The most important thing is to choose colors that complement your skin tone. White 47 and black are popular lingerie colors, but they make pale skin look even more pasty. Nude tones and bright colors flatter most skin tones. Have some fun with this! Choose colors that make you feel sexy, girly, vampy – or whatever aspect of your personality you want to channel that day. 4. Be impeccable with your grooming Let’s face it – there’s nothing sexy about hair peeking out of your bra or panties!If you are going to wear beautiful lingerie, be sure your grooming habits are up to par. Shave or wax regularly and apply lotion daily so you are always prepared to show some skin. How to Keep Your Clothes Looking New By Whole Living | Team Mom Martha Stewart Living Of the many household tasks, doing the laundry seems to be a no-brainer: Put clothes in the washer, add detergent, and press start. But regular washing can take a toll on your garments. Here's how to prevent white shirts from turning gray, sort your bright clothing (hint: you need more than one pile), undo the damage when colors run, and perform many other tricks that will keep your clothes and linens in near-original condition. HOW TO KEEP WHITES WHITE The main reason white items turn gray or become dull is incorrect sorting. People generally have few all-white loads, so they tend to mix whites with colored garments. 48 Unfortunately, some types of fabric, notably cotton, aren't colorfast, so their dye molecules wind up in the wash water and settle on other fabrics, noticeably on white and other light ones. Washing heavily soiled items, such as athletic socks, with lightly soiled ones, such as sheets, can also lead to dinginess. Unless you add enough detergent to hold the dirt in suspension, it will end up back on the very articles you intended to clean. Water quality, too, can affect how your whites emerge from the washer. Iron-laden water and hard water (rich in calcium and magnesium) can render detergents less effective and cause staining. What to Do Wash whites separately.The best way to retain whiteness is to launder white items together in the hottest water the fabric will tolerate (water that is at least 120 degrees is most effective at removing soil). Choose detergent with a bleach alternative and/or enzymes, using the maximum amount recommended. Add a laundry booster. You can increase the cleaning power of a detergent by adding a booster, such as borax, oxygen bleach, or washing soda to help maintain whiteness. Before washing, soak heavily soiled items using an enzyme detergent (available in the laundry aisle of many supermarkets) or oxygen bleach, and launder them separately. Pretreat body-oil marks. To remove perspiration and other greasy stains, pretreat with liquid detergent, dishwashing liquid, or shampoo (use colorless ones to avoid dye transfer). Gently rub the liquid into the fabric using a clean toothbrush or complexion brush. Tackle colored stains. Address food spills, such as coffee or juice, and underarm yellowing, which is residue from antiperspirant or deodorant, by applying undiluted liquid oxygen bleach directly to the fabric immediately before laundering. Use a color remover. Once a month or when your whites become dull, wash them with a color remover (available in the laundry aisle of many supermarkets). Alternatively, soak items in boiling water and oxygen bleach in a basin (this is suitable only for fabrics that won't shrink). You may have to experiment to determine which technique whitens best. Accept less than perfect. Even with meticulous sorting, don't expect whites to stay fluorescent bright forever. When white fabrics are manufactured, they are often treated with optical brighteners, which are chemicals that boost whiteness. They will eventually wash out and cannot be replaced. Minerals and water If your water has a high iron content (look for reddish stains in the shower and toilet), launder with an iron-removing product (available in the laundry aisle of many supermarkets). Don't use chlorine bleach: Combined with iron and hot water, it can yellow clothing. Instead, use oxygen 49 bleach, which is a more effective (and more environmentally friendly) alternative. For hard water (evidenced by rough, hard-to-clean deposits on bathroom fixtures), some detergent labels call for using larger amounts. If your water is particularly hard, you may not be able to get whites pristine unless you install a water softener, which removes minerals. HOW TO KEEP DARKS DARK During the wash cycle, articles of clothing collide with one another and the washer's interior, which causes some of the fibers in the fabric to break, exposing the raw fiber ends. This friction disrupts the surface of the fabric, tricking the eye into seeing less color. Tumble drying can cause similar damage, though to a lesser extent. Also, washing darks in warm or hot water can hasten dye loss. With some fabrics, expect a certain amount of fading; theres no such thing, for instance, as truly colorfast cotton. What to Do Wash darks separately. To help preserve dark items' original colors and prevent bleeding onto lighter clothes, wash darks together using the cold-water cycle (60 to 80 degrees). Use the shortest cycle. Select the appropriate setting depending on how soiled the clothes are and what fabric they're made of. As far as detergents go, experts say that they don't really contribute to fading. While some formulas are designed specifically for darks, any liquid detergent without a bleach alternative is suitable (liquids work better in cold water; powders may not dissolve fully). Minimize abrasion. Prepare your clothes for the washer by closing zippers, fastening hooks, and turning items inside out. Also, wash items of similar weight together -- that is, don't wash a cashmere sweater and jeans in the same load just because they're dark blue. Line-dry darks. Whenever possible, hang dark items to dry (out of direct sunlight); this helps maintain their original appearance. When you do use the dryer, opt for the lowest temperature suitable for the material, and be careful not to overdry your clothes. Remove them from the machine as soon as they're dry or even while they're slightly damp; this will help keep shrinkage to a minimum. Washing in winter. Although cold water helps prevent dark clothing from fading, frigid outdoor temperatures may cause the washer's water temperature to fall below 40 degrees, rendering even detergents designed to work in cold water ineffective. If you live in an area with particularly chilly winters, don't use the cold-water wash setting during that time of year. Instead, select a warm-water wash and a cold rinse. HOW TO KEEP BRIGHTS BRIGHT As with darks, wear and tear in the washer and dryer as well as warm and hot water can cause 50 colors to fade. Deep, bright garments often shed a little dye over time, so some color loss is inevitable. Separate by color intensity. Launder colored items in two groups: brights and pastels. Wash brand-new brights on their own for the first few cycles, when they're most likely to bleed significant amounts of dye. Turn items inside out. Keep brights looking good longer by reversing them before washing. Choose the shortest cycle appropriate for the soil level and fabric. When colors run Forget soaking your bright fabrics in salt or vinegar to forestall bleeding; it won't help. If brights do bleed onto other clothing in the wash, don't put the stained items in the dryer. The heat will set the dye, making any discoloration permanent. Instead, launder the clothes again separately. As long as you don't apply heat, the dye should come out, even if you don't rewash the items immediately 12 Strategies for Clearing Clutter It’s possible that no area in the home is more abused than the space under a sink. Yes, that footage is meant to house your supplies. No, it’s not meant to be packed like the storage equivalent of a clown car, where item after item is squeezed in, only to come tumbling out. Equip yourself withsmart ideas and gear to corral your clutter. Organize Pots & Pans: The Strategy Short on cabinet space? With smart organizers, your cooking set and a small appliance can find a cozy home under the sink. The secret? Rolling drawers that make it easy to slide and retrieve items stored in the back. 51 Organize Pots & Pans: The Tricks Left: Stash the items that you use less frequently (stock pots, stand mixer, slow-cooker) in the back since you won’t need them every day. Keep the items that you reach for often in the front like saucepans and frying pans. To buy: Roll-Out Cabinet Drawer, $75,organize.com. Organize Kitchen Cleaning Supplies: The Strategy Storing soaps, sprays, and sponges under the sink is a natural fit—you want to keep them hidden. Just make sure that everything is easily accessible, so you don’t have to move 18 different spray bottles just to reach the extra roll of paper towels. Organize Kitchen Cleaning Supplies: Clever Tricks Left: A lazy Susan is the perfect solution to hold all your solvents. Whether you need all-purpose spray, dishwasher detergent, or a hand soap refill, they are all just a spin away. To buy: Lazy Susan, $25,containerstore.com. Organize Kitchen Trash & Recycling: The Strategy Out of sight...but hardly out of mind. Keep refuse hidden, yet still organized, underneath the sink. Prep those recyclables for collection by arming yourself with tools for sorting from the get-go. Assign one bin per category to keep glass and plastic containers separate from magazines and newspapers. Organize Kitchen Trash & Recycling: The Tricks Left: A gliding bin like this one keeps garbage and recyclables separate, but still easy to reach. If you have a step can for your trash, task both bins with recycling duties and separate by type. To buy: Pull Out Recycler, $80,simplehuman.com. 52 Organize Bathroom Cleaners: The Strategy If you’re lucky enough to have closed storage under your bathroom sink, use it for stashing cleaning supplies and extra toilet paper. Give the things you use daily a prominent spot, and store everything else together. Organize Bathroom Cleaners: The Tricks Left: Keep the rest of your scrubbing supplies in an easy-to-grab basket so you can pull it out when it’s time to give everything a once-over. If your cabinet is wide enough, fill a second basket with extra toilet paper and boxes of tissue. Large bottles, like those bulky bleach ones, can be stashed in the back. To buy: Vinea Storage Baskets, starting at $12.50, organize.com. Right: For the cleaning supplies you grab on a regular basis (shower spray, glass cleaner), use a tension rod to hang them separately from the other products. To buy: Tension rod, $6, homedepot.com. Organize Cosmetics & Toiletries: The Strategy If you’re a makeup junkie, use the space under your sink to stash everything from cotton swabs and hair ties to extra body wash and your constantly expanding nail polish collection. Keep family members’ items together by giving each person a matching basket with all of their daily essentials inside. Organize Cosmetics & Toiletries: The Tricks Left: Avoid a mess of cords by keeping the hair dryer in this unique over-the-door bin. Want everything at your fingertips? There’s even room for stashing a round brush and favorite styling product. (We’ve got you covered for beating the morning rush!) To buy: Over-the-Door Cabinet Organizer, $30, stacksandstacks.com. Right: Even if your drawers are somewhat translucent, clearly label what’s stored inside so you don’t waste time digging around searching for what you need. Smaller plastic containers (or even cardboard jewelry boxes) are perfect for keeping like things together. Maintaining a sense of order can actually be therapeutic. To buy: Elfa Mesh Drawer Unit, starting at $81, containerstore.com. 53 The Gossip Fence Transgender in the News Advocacy Coalition Supports MPD Clarification of Condom Policy Washington, DC — The Metropolitan Police Department (MPD) is taking steps to educate the community and police officers about the possession of condoms – they are not to be considered reasonable cause to stop, search, or arrest someone. In addition to clarifying Department policy via police “roll call” bulletin, MPD has begun to distribute cards in the community explaining that individuals have the right to carry as many condoms as they want in the District of Columbia. The card text reads: Know Your Rights » The MPD supports the distribution of condoms to help prevent the spread of HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. » Individuals are allowed to carry as many condoms as they want. There is no “three condom rule.” » MPD officers cannot conduct a stop or conduct a search of a person or premises based on whether or not that person possesses condoms. The card also provides information on how to make complaints of police misconduct, in the case that an officer fails to follow these guidelines. A scan of the card is attached. “This important development will help promote condom use in the District, where we have one of the highest rates of HIV in the country,” said Rebekah Horowitz, Policy and Advocacy Manager at The Women’s Collective. “We often hear from community members that they believe possession of more than three condoms can be grounds for arrest,” said Cyndee Clay, Executive Director of HIPS. “The MPD’s statements put the myth of the ‘three condom rule’ to rest and make clear the process for reporting police officers who violate the condom possession policy.” 'Gay Panic' Defense Trotted Out In Murder of Mayoral Candidate The family of the man charged with killing Marco McMillilan, a gay mayoral candidate in Clarksdale, Miss., told a local news station that McMillian tried to assault the suspect and that he killed McMillian in self-defense. 54 On March 1 the Coahoma County Sheriff's Department charged Lawrence Reed, 22, of Shelby, Miss., in the death of McMillian, 34, whose body was found beaten and burned February 27, just one day after Reed crashed McMillian's white SUV in a head-on collision. Now Reed's friends and family are turning to the tried-and-true "gay panic" defense, saying McMillian was making unwanted advances toward Reed, which caused him to panic and kill the candidate. McMillian's family said they want his death to be investigated as a hate crime, due to the nature of the incident. However, the Coahoma County Sheriff's Department said they would not explore the option, Jackson's Clarion-Ledger newspaper reports. Mississippi does not have hate -crimes legislation that covers crimes based on sexual orientation. In response, the FBI stepped in to investigate the candidate's death and consider whether Reed could be charged under federal hate-crimes laws such as the Shepard-Byrd Hate Crimes Prevention Act. McMillian was one of four Democrats seeking the Clarksdale mayoral nomination and "was considered one of the first viable openly gay office-seekers in the state," USA Today notes. Judge says transgender woman faced discrimination IOWA CITY, Iowa (AP) — A state administrative law judge has ruled that a transgender woman should not have been ordered out of a courthouse women's restroom by a sheriff's deputy. The judge decided in favor of Jodie Jones, who has been presenting herself as a woman since May 2011, the Iowa City Press-Citizen reported. The ruling by Administrative Law Judge Heather Palmer came Tuesday. Jones, 56, filed a complaint with the Iowa Civil Rights Commission after a November 2011 incident in which she says she was confronted by a female sheriff's deputy after going into a women's restroom in the Johnson County Courthouse. Jones said the deputy yelled at her to leave immediately. Jones complied, but said she told the deputy she had a legal right to use the restroom. Jones said the deputy replied she had to leave "regardless of what the law is." Under Iowa law, it is discriminatory to deny a person use of a public accommodation based on their gender identity. The commission also says state law requires that individuals be permitted access to public facilities in accordance with their gender identity, rather than their sex at birth, without being harassed or questioned. The deputy, who is now retired, acknowledged asking Jones to leave the restroom, but denied yelling at Jones. The deputy testified that she had seen Jones in female dress before, but denied knowing Jones was transgender until she received the civil rights complaint. The judge said Jones was dressed as a woman previously at the courthouse and when she used the women's restroom, so the deputy "had sufficient information to conclude Jones was a transgendered woman." Judge Hands Down Fine In Columbus’ First-Ever Transgender Discrimination Case COLUMBUS, Ohio - A judge ordered the owners of the Capital Club to pay a $1,000 fine in 55 the city’s first-ever transgender discrimination case. Attorneys for Columbus Hospitality LLC, managers of private downtown Capital Club, pleaded no contest in January to a charge of unlawful employment practices against 53-year-old Savanna DeLong. DeLong worked as a massage therapist for the club. DeLong alleged that the club discriminated against her by not using her services when they found out she was making the transition from being a man to being a woman. Transgender people face unique problems The transgender population in the United States is difficult to precisely measure, says Harper Jean Tobin, the policy director at the National Center for Transgender Equality in Washington, D.C. The term “transgender” means different things to different people, for one thing, and people may be reluctant to identify themselves as transgender because of fear of discrimination or other reasons. But an article from the Williams Institute at the UCLA School of Law cites population studies in estimating that there may be 700,000 transgender people in the United States -- 0.03 percent of the population. Among the challenges most commonly cited are violence, poverty and access to health care. Violence can include attacks or it could be harassment and improper incarceration classifications, said Elroi Windsor, an assistant professor at Salem College and a researcher in transgender health-care issues. The center for transgender equality says that more than one in four adults have lost at least one job because of bias and more than three-fourths have experienced discrimination. Employment discrimination has implications for health care because it can mean a lack of insurance, the center said. And even those who have health insurance often must face exclusions on gender-reassignment procedures. In addition to that, Windsor said, health providers often also lack education and training to respond to the specific needs of transgender people. Other difficulties relate to legal or other public acknowledgement of transgender identity. For example, there’s the issue of pronoun usage: The transgender-equality center advises journalists to use the pronoun that the person prefers. Tobin said a lack of understanding is at the root of all the levels of discrimination, though she said the situation has markedly improved in recent years. Why Kids Are Getting Transgender Surgery As transgender rights gain greater attention, parents and doctors are embracing transgender surgery for children at younger ages—including kids in elementary school, writes Margaret Talbot in the New Yorker. The thinking: With early surgery and puberty-suppressing 56 medication, kids will be better-looking and psychologically stronger as they make the gender transition. But some parents are straining under the pressure of making such a huge decision for a young child. "I wonder if I'm holding him back," says the father of a 3-year-old who seems transgender. "Like, should I be asking, 'Do you want to be called a he or she?'" But some experts note the risks of early medical treatment, and a few parents are still nervous: "A lot of these kids are sad for a variety of reasons," says the mother of a FTM teen. "Maybe the gender feelings are the underlying cause, maybe not." Quebec launches first awareness campaign to tackle homophobia and transphobia The Minister of Justice in Canada’s province of Quebec has launched a campaign against homophobia, including television and radio ads attempting to help people become more open and accepting towards same-sex couples. The campaign consists of two television adverts in French, and one radio spot in English. They all encourage viewers or listeners to ask themselves whether they are really open to sexual diversity. Both TV adverts end with same-sex couples sharing a kiss, which is followed by the question: “Does this change the way you thought twenty seconds ago?” As well as the adverts, the campaign includes a an interactive website which allows users to investigate different situations, and challenges the way the user looks at them. It contains resources for fighting homophobia, and information about different types of homophobia. Queen Elizabeth makes historic pledge for gay rights Queen Elizabeth will go before the world tomorrow and speak in support of LGBT rights. According to the Daily Mail, she will sign a new Commonwealth Charter meant to stop discrimination against gay and lesbian people and promote the ‘empowerment’ of women. Part of the charter will read: ‘We are implacably opposed to all forms of discrimination, whether rooted in gender, race, colour, creed, political belief or other grounds’. Though the Queen's charter does not explicitly refer to the LGBT community, a diplomatic source said: ‘The impact of this statement on gay and women’s rights should not be underestimated. 'Some of the worst persecution of gay people in the world takes place in Commonwealth countries as a result of the British Empire'. In regards to gender rights, the Queen's charter says: ‘We recognize that gender equality and women’s empowerment are essential components of human development and basic human rights. The advancement of women’s rights and the education of girls are critical preconditions for effective and sustainable development'. This marks the Queen’s first commitment to LGBT rights in her 61-year reign, and her first 57 public appearance since leaving the hospital where she was receiving treatment for a stomach bug. The Queen will sign the document, which could have potential effects for future rulers specifically the offspring of Prince William and the Duchess of Cambridge, at London’s Marlborough House tomorrow, Commonwealth Day. Royal Oak, Mich., passes LGBT and HIV-inclusive Human Rights Ordinance ROYAL OAK, Mich. – The city commission in Royal Oak, Mich., a suburban Detroit municipality, on Monday approved an ordinance prohibiting discrimination against LGBT and HIV positive residents in the areas of housing and employment. The vote in favor of the ordinance was 6-1. Royal Oak becomes one of 22 cities across Michigan to pass such protections in absence of a statewide law to protect LGBT citizens from discrimination.,” added Dievendorf. Phoenix City Council approves anti-bias measure PHOENIX (CBS5/AP) - The Phoenix City Council has approved a proposal to expand the city's anti-discrimination law to include protections for gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgender people in city contracts, housing, employment and public accommodations such as restaurants. The vote was 5-3. Councilmen Jim Waring, Bill Gates and Sal DiCiccio voted "no." The Human Relations Ordinance revolves around adding three phrases to the city's anti-discrimination policies when it comes to employment, housing, city contracts and public accommodations. Those phrases are "sexual orientation," "gender identity" and "disability." New LGBT inclusive domestic violence law signed by Obama President Obama has signed the Violence Against Women Act, which now also protects LGBT Americans from domestic violence and sexual assault. It marks an important win for LGBT campaigners and Native Americans, who will see new protections under the law, and for President Obama, whose attempts to push for a renewal failed last year. Some House Republicans had held up reauthorisation for weeks in a dispute over expansions to the 1994 law, although it was passed by the US Congress late last month. Senate Democrats offered an expanded law that specifically protects gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and transgender Americans and gives tribal authorities the power to prosecute non-Indians for abuse committed on tribal lands. “This is your day. This is the day of the advocates, the day of the survivors. This is your 58 victory,’’ the president said. ‘‘This victory shows that when the American people make their voices heard, Washington listens.’’ President Obama and Vice President Joe Biden offered special thanks to Republicans, including Senator Susan Collins of Maine, who supported the renewal despite opposition from many in her party. Experts: Gender awareness comes at early age In her career as a licensed professional counselor in Colorado Springs, Dara Hoffman has worked with transgender adults, teenagers to retirees. The hundreds of stories she’s heard are diverse, but consistent about one thing: Gender — and transgender — awareness comes at a very young age. “Today, I met a new client who is (female) transitioning to male. He said, ‘ever since I was a little kid, I felt like a little boy.’ That’s almost word-for-word the same thing I always hear,” Hoffman said. “There’s just this innate sense of gender, even before they know that boys do this stuff or girls do this stuff.” “People are asking, how can a kid really know? But it’s not impossible whatsoever (for an adult) to be able to remember back that long ago, and say that’s when I really started to feel different,” Hoffman said. “We don’t start off knowing for sure what our unique expression of gender is.” Pediatricians see growing number of crosss-gender kids like Coy Mathis Experts say increasing numbers of little kids are showing up in doctors offices insisting they were born into the body of the wrong sex — kids like Coy Mathis, the 6-year-old child banned from using the girls' bathroom at her Fountain school because she is biologically male. "We're seeing it all across the state," said Dr. Daniel Reirden, a Children's Hospital Colorado physician who said his referrals "went up 200-fold" after he spoke on the issue of children and gender-identity disorder at a recent conference. Described as "gender-variant," these children typically begin to demonstrate cross-gender behaviors between the ages of 2 and 4. They express a strong desire to live as the opposite gender — clothes, toys, pronouns. Sometimes, it's typical preschool curiosity. But for other kids, it's the beginning of a life out of the ordinary, challenging societal expectations of what defines their gender. "In many rural communities, or places with less metropolitan areas, a lot of times kids will know something is different about them, and they identify this way, but there is social pressure to be your birth gender," Reirden said. Some adults who grew up in the '50s and '60s felt this way but never talked about it, said Karen Scarpella, program director for the Gender Identity Center of Colorado "There all these adults who say, 'I knew when I was 3 or 4, but I couldn't tell anyone. That was made very clear to me.' But now we're in a society that allows more gender-bending, and we can express ourselves 59 more," Scarpella said. As the general public becomes more aware of the issue through stories about kids such as Coy, the scientific community is also starting to expand its research into life cycles of transgender people to include children. Mexican Town Bans Women in Miniskirts and Fines Crossdressers The security chief of a Mexican border town has decided to ban women from wearing miniskirts, and to impose fines on men who parade the streets of his city in female attire. Javier Agudelo is a retired general and now the top security officer in Ciudad Acuña, a city of 140,000 residents across the Texas border. He told local newspapers that miniskirts and cross dressing had to be banned in town in order to preserve "morality" and "decency," but also said that women who wear short skirts, or men who dress as women, can use their apparel to "commit several sorts of crimes." Agudelo's moral crusade has, of course, been rejected by local LGBT community leaders who say that police in Ciudad Acuña already discriminate against transgender men. Representatives of the LGBT community told local newspaper El Zocalo that they are planning protests against the new "security measures," and are seeking advice from Mexico's National Commission on Human Rights. Banning miniskirts is unlikely to chase many real criminals away from Ciudad Acuña. For several years, the Zetas gang has used this city to ship drugs into the United States, and in 2012 almost half of the city's police officers were fired after they failed to pass anti-corruption background checks. Agudelo himself was under investigation for the murder of Jose Eduardo Moreira, the son of a former state governor. He was cleared of charges in the killing however, which is thought to have been a revenge attack from the Zetas on the Moreira family. Agudelo, by the way, is not the only public official in Mexico who has proposed a miniskirt ban. According to Mexican website 10puntos.com, officials in at least ten different states and cities have recently tried to ban the miniskirt in universities, government agencies and at local churches. The miniskirt ban in Ciudad Acuña, however, seems to be the first that will affect all of the residents of a city, even when they are not at work. NCTE Leads Effort to End LGBTI Sexual Abuse in Immigration Detention The National Center for Transgender Equality, with our partners at Just Detention International led advocacy efforts urging Secretary Napolitano and the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) to strengthen protections against sexual abuse of LGBT people and people with intersex conditions in immigration detention. In addition to organizing over 800 individual comments and dozens of organizational comments, NCTE joined eight other national LGBT and allied groups in filing over 30 pages of public comments on the proposed regulations that address this problem, which is part of the implementation of the Prison Rape Elimination Act. 60 While the proposed regulations represent an important step toward ending the victimization of people in immigration detention facilities, NCTE and other advocates identified several flaws that hamper the effectiveness of the regulations, both overall and with respect to the specific vulnerabilities of LGBTI detainees. Primarily, we are urging Secretary Napolitano to require comprehensive training for all facility staff; provide appropriate search and housing procedures for LGBTI detainees; and ensure that the final rules apply to all immigration detention facilities without delay. Other recommendations include: 1. Ensuring that all of the regulation’s rules apply to agency contractors in order to close the gap of implementation in contracted immigration detention facilities; 2. Prohibiting facility policies that punish or prevent detainees’ gender expression, or restrict access to medical or mental healthcare, in the name of preventing abuse; and 3. Creating administrative timelines and processes to prevent detainees from being held in isolation indefinitely. Mental-Health Providers Less Comfortable With Bi Men, Trans People A rather unique survey coming out of California suggest that mental-health providers are still failing the LGBT community to some extent. Conducted by the LGBTQ Reducing Disparities Project, First, Do No Harm found that providers treated different segments of the community differently. “Providers were more comfortable for example with people who are gay or lesbian versus people who are bisexual. They were less comfortable with bisexual men than bisexual women and then they were less comfortable with people who are transgender,” said researcher Poshi Mikalson.. In addition to comfort levels, many mental-health providers are not trained in addressing issues particular to the LGBT community—they may not even know to ask a patient about his or her sexuality or gender expression. More than 1100 murdere trans people reported: TGEU Press Release (March 2013) Constant rise in murder rates: Transgender Europe’s Trans Murder Monitoring project reveals more than 1,100 reported murders of trans people in the last five years The March 2013 update reveals a total of 1,123 reported killings of trans people in 57 countries worldwide from January 1st 2008 to December 31st 2012. The update shows a significant/ constant increase in reported killings of trans people over the last five years. In 2008, 148 cases were reported, in 2009 217 cases, in 2010 229 cases, in 2011 262 cases, and in 2012 267 cases. Clearly the shocking amount of violence against trans people still poses a major problem and threat to trans people in many countries. The alarming figures demonstrate once more that there is an urgent need to react to the violence against trans people and to seek mechanisms to protect 61 trans people. Cases have been reported from all major World Regions (Africa, Asia, Central and South America, Europe, North America, and Oceania), evoking an evermore gruesome picture, especially given the very partial knowledge we are able to gain in many places. Throughout all six world regions, the highest absolute numbers have been found in countries with strong trans movements and trans or LGBT organizations that do a professional monitoring: Brazil (452), Mexico (106), and Colombia (65) in Central and South America, the USA (69) in North America, Turkey (30) in Europe, and The Philippines (28) in Asia. Leading ‘ex-gay’ therapists group loses tax free status The National Association for the Research and Therapy of Homosexuality which claims that homosexuals can turn straight through therapy has lost its tax exempt status after it failed to file the correct paperwork for three years in a row The group was founded by psychologists and psychiatrists Joseph Nicolosi, Benjamin Kaufman and Charles Socarides and claims to assist ‘those who struggle with unwanted homosexuality.’ Socarides’ son Richard is a prominent US LGBT activist. The lost of tax exempt status has been welcomed by US LBGT rights advocates including the group Human Rights Campaign (HRC). A former patient who was referred to a therapist by NARTH said that he hoped the IRS’ decision would lead to the organization’s eventual closure. In 2010 it was revealed that a then leading NARTH member, George Rekkers, had hired a male prostitute to escort him on an overseas holiday. California has banned minors from being subjected to so-called conversion therapies and Democratic lawmakers in New Jersey hope to follow suit with their own. Could European Union Ban Antigay Speech? The European Parliament on Thursday called for homophobic and transphobic speech to be banned throughout the European Union. The European Union already bans racist and xenophobic speech and hate crimes; LGBT advocates have been pushing for antigay and antitrans verbiage and attacks to be criminalized as well. This new resolution from the European Parliament adds to the pressure on the EU. "This is an urgently needed piece of EU legislation which we have been asking for years," Martin Christensen, cochair of ILGA-Europe's executive board, said in a statement. "The EU Commission needs to move from promising statements to concrete action and propose the changes and ban hate crime and speech against LGBTI people. We are truly grateful to the European Parliament to maintaining the pressure on other EU institutions to act." 62 Maryland Senate Committee Votes Down Bill That Would Have Banned Transgender Discrimination A state Senate committee in Maryland dealt a tough blow to transgender rights by voting down a bill that would have banned gender-identity discrimination in housing, employment and public accommodation. The committee voted 6-5 to narrowly defeat the Fairness For All Marylanders Act Of 2013, which would have added "gender identity" to the law that right now prohibits discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, age, disability, marital status and sexual orientation, The Washington Blade reports. The bill may have been doomed when a senator who supported it was moved off the committee and replaced by one who voted against it , Metro Weekly writes. That switch was made by Senate leadership in order to pass a wind energy bill, the paper notes. A similar bill proposed last year -- after Maryland's governor, Martin O'Malley, called for greater protections for transgender people -- also died in a Senate committee before it could reach the floor for a full vote. In 2011 and in 2010, similar measures also died before they could reach the governor's desk, according to The Washington Post. But although 16 states and Washington, D.C., have laws against gender-identity discrimination, there is currently no federal law against it. The Employment Non-Discrimination Act, which would outlaw most employer discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity , has languished in Congress since it was introduced nearly 20 years ago US: Fraternity to donate $18,000 to charity after insurance agrees to cover trans brother’s surgery The trans student whose fraternity launched a fundraiser to pay for his chest surgery has learned that insurance will cover his operation, meaning most of the $20,000 raised can go to helping other trans people in need. Emerson College fraternity Phi Alpha Tau raised over $20,000 to cover the costs of top surgery for new member Donnie Collins, after learning he was a trans man who could not afford surgery in February Mr Collins was already paying for hormone therapy out of his own pocket and was seeking to get chest surgery as the next step in his gender reassignment. However, he could not afford to pay for the $8,000 ($5,300) procedure on his own, and his student insurance policy rejected his claim to cover it. Phi Alpha Tau then began fundraising on his behalf and broke their own goals with the help of widespread media coverage The fraternity and Mr Collins were unaware that Emerson College were also looking into the issue, and had chased up their insurance provider, Aetna. It emerged that although the college’s 63 policy covered surgery for transgender students, Aetna had not updated their internal files to reflect this. Once this inaccuracy was deal with the college got in touch with Mr Collins to inform him his surgery would be covered. The $18,000 left over will now be granted to the Jim Collins Foundation, an initiative which gives grants for gender reassignment surgery. Mr Collins said: “We can help people that need this money a lot more than I do. That’s a really incredible feeling. DCTC finds evidence of bias in MPD hate crimes review In testimony before the DC Council Committee on the Judiciary and Public Safety today, the DC Trans Coalition notes evidence of bias in the “independent” review of hate crimes response and LGBTQ community relations that the Metropolitan Police Department commissioned from the Anti-Defamation League (ADL). DCTC obtained over 1500 pages of MPD Chief Cathy Lanier’s emails pertaining to the ADL review, which was announced last year, following DCTC’s October 2011 request for confidential mediation with MPD facilitated by the Community Relations Service of the U.S. Department of Justice. In short, the ADL hate crimes review task force has proven itself to be both insufficient to address community concerns, and blatantly biased against us. We do not relish conflict between our communities and MPD. Yet, due to a persistent failure to listen openly to our concerns, conflict persists, and the day to day lives of trans people in DC are endangered as a result. Our concern is that the ADL-led task force is a publicity stunt rather than a good-faith effort at making progress. We once again encourage MPD to accept our offer of confidential mediation through the Department of Justice’s Community Relations Service. Westboro Baptist Church Gets a Taste of Its Own Medicine The most hateful church in America has some colorful new neighbors. This week, members of the Florida-based nonprofit Planting Peace unveiled a project months in the making: Equality House, an activism center located directly across from the Westboro Baptist Church outside Topeka, Kansas. From now on, the group known for picketing the funerals of everyone from military members killed in action to Mr. Rogers, in protest of America’s tolerance of homosexuality, will wake up every morning and stare at an LGBT rainbow—after Equality House members painted the building to match the gay pride flag. “We walked around Westboro’s neighborhood on Google street 64 view and thought: ‘It would be awesome to get a house right there and paint it rainbow,’ ” says Hammet. As it turned out, the house directly across the street from the church was for sale. After months of negotiations, Project Peace purchased the property for just over $80,000. “Before we launched, we tried to keep quiet. Shortly after I moved in, someone from Wetsboro almost backed over me in her car. It was an accident, and she apologized. But it was bizarre— this hate-filled person smiling and waving at me.” Hammet says his group hopes to use the publicity from Equality House to help launch an antibullying campaign among other initiatives. “This is hopefully just the start,” he says. “We want this to be used to spark conversation about equality in every home. We believe the fastest way toward equality is by speaking out.” For now, Equality House will likely be used as an activist training center. Despite its new exterior decorations, the facility remains rather modest. After weeks of sleeping on the floor, Hammet says he finally has a bed and a desk to work from: “It’s pretty basic. But it could be barren and still be warm, because this place is full of love.” 110 Congress Members Urge Executive Order as ENDA Stopgap Congress members have asked President Barack Obama to sign an executive order prohibiting federal contractors from discriminating in the workplace based on sexual orientation or gender identity. One hundred ten members of Congress signed the open letter, sent to the president Wednesday. Though Obama has been a long supporter of the Employment Non-Discrimination Act, which would prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity, he has not indicated that he would sign an executive order. At least 16.5 million Americans would be protected under the proposed executive order, according to the Williams Institute, as federal contractors are one of the largest employer subsets in the country. But currently it is legal to fire people on the basis of their sexual orientation in 29 states and legal to fire people on the basis of their gender identity or expression in 34 states. Because of this, approximately 43% of LGB people and 90% of transgender people have experienced some sort of workplace discrimination. "With a majority of American workers living in states that have not passed laws granting LGBT employees legal protections from workplace discrimination, an executive order will provide broad protections that will level the playing field," the Congress members wrote. 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 ir l p e A n e si s e R M ian D April 2013 SUN MON TUE WED THU FRI SAT 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30