04/24/2014 - Long Beach Hash House Harriers



04/24/2014 - Long Beach Hash House Harriers
Hash Hotline:(562)888-0LBH(0524)
April 24, 2014
Okay. Here it is, an absolutely
beautiful spring day in Sunny
Southern California. We have these
wonderful images of cute little snowwhite easter bunnies pooping out cute
little chocolate eggs. That’s like the
most believable myth that comes out
of the Easter celebration. Less than
believable is thinking that Kowpaddy
would lay a decent trail, in keeping
with the spirit of the day. But he did.
Well, I guess if Christ can die and rise
again, miracles can indeed happen. So we’re all standing around by
Parks Junior High, and Kowpaddy
starts his pre-run brief. Ten
interminable minutes or so later, we’re
all still standing by listening to
Kowpaddy’s pre-run brief. It’s now
the mid-run brief, soon to be followed
by the post-run brief. Nothing he
said provided any enlightenment to be
transferred to the pack. Oh, wait – he
finally said “Three beer checks.” Now
that made a difference – which is what
kept most of us on the trail after all! When he, and TIM and SPONGE
finally left, they headed north, and put
a check on Rosecrans. Yup, up to !
! Run # 1609
Date: April 20, 2014
Attendance: 63
! Miles:
Hares: Kowpaddy Kowboy, Sponge and
Tim the Toolman Gaylord
Place: Edward White Park, Fullerton
New Boots: Fujino Sho, Tessa Knowlson
Visitors: Red Box- LAH3
Choo Choo, Caboose, SOSA,
Hose B, F*k You I’m Leaving, Dr. Shefield IHAMV, Jessica Pummel
Patches: Ben Dover=700
Hashit: Sponge for not remembering that
she was a hare today.
On-On: Islands
Run Notes: A2A, running through Coyote
Hills, yes more hills, too many bicyclists in the way, 2 beer checks, !
Grissom Park, and from
there hash trails always go
north, so of course we all ran
north. Except this one didn’t
go north – YBF! True trail
trended east and then north
to a Beer Check in a
residential community. From there, on up into
the Chevron private
property. (NOTE: It looks
like the conservation people
have won, totally vetoing a
bid by Chevron and land
developers to turn this
wonderful land into about
700 condos. It will be
donated to a conservancy, so
our grandkids can hash
there!) We hit another beer
check, and after a beer (or
two) with TIM the TOOLMAN,
I didn’t really care what else
happened. !
true trail, and off I went.
Because I’m quite
familiar with this area (when
I can see straight) I knew
where we were going, but it
still took me awhile to get
there because of the three or
seven beer checks. All in all,
Back out of Chevron,
I’d say it was a really shitty
east and south through some trail, totally worthy of the
pretty good hills toward
LBH3 – if only we didn’t have
Rosecrans. Caught up to
to listen to the Hare’s mindChoo Choo and Caboose
numbing babble at the start.
slogging up the hill,
Shitty trail, and thanks,
muttering something rude
about “Long Beach Trail”,
and – Bless my soul! –
another beer check! Jesus
has indeed risen – I’m in
Paradise! After that,
somebody finally pushed me
in the general direction of !
On a personal note, I’d like
to thank LBH3 for
acknowledging the 25th
anniversary of me &
Alouette’s wedding (LBH3
Run #227, 29 April 1989).
Your kind thoughts and
wonderful friendship over
these many years, are greatly
appreciated. You all made it
a huge day for Alouette and
me (both on that day in
1989 and this last Sunday),
and we will always be
grateful to you for that.
From our hearts.
Thanks and ON ON, our
good friends! WB & AL
Date Run #
Comments! !
5-08 1614
I Chink So, Victoria’s Secretion & Scratch and Sniff Chinco de Mayo!
Camel Toe Hoe, Last Train & Misery Hare!
5-22 1616
OPEN! See 2 Yung 2 Du or Kowpaddy to be the Hare!
5-29 1617
OPEN! See 2 Yung 2 Du or Kowpaddy to be the Hare!
6-05 1618
Jock & Pack My Chute!
Who Let the Cock Out!
Mismanagement Contacts:
Grandmasters: Hairy Twatter (714)926-9844
“Strawberry Short Dick” (562)714-4450
Trailmasters: 2 Yung 2 Du (562)338-5449
Kowpaddy Kowboy (714)225-5887
Hash Cash: “Hi Speed Copulator” (562)822-8400
Thursday, May 1, 2014, 6:30pm
Run #: 1613
Hares: Jock & Pack My Chute
Location:1491 W Via Plata St, Long Beach
Cost: $5.00
D-Erections: 405 North: exit Alameda St. and go north. Right/East turn at Carson St. Left at Via Oro Ave. and
follow around to Via Plata St. LFH.
405 South: Exit Wardlow. Right on Wardlow turns into E 223rd St. First Left to turn to Alameda St., Another
Right on Alameda St., Right on Carson St. Left at Via Oro Ave. and follow around to Via Plata St. LFH.
This is a trail. This is only a trail. But it will be fun. It’s May Day. And it’s not, not, not pet or stroller
friendly. Flash lights suggested. Come on out and try to snare some old hares. We’ll see you there. On-On
Write-ups, Pictures, Hash Directions and other Blasphemy MUST BE
SNOOZE Email to: [email protected]
Run # 1051
Date: 4/22/04 (10 years ago)
Hares: SIN D BARE (solo)
Miles: 5
Place: Harbor City
Attendance: 76
This Thursday night found us in a Park and Ride at the corner of PCH and Figueroa. Scribe WET
CLAM (with help from KRABS R US) reported that SIN D BARE led us to a bridge and an eagle/turkey
split. The eagle dropped us into a “homeless condominium and the grocery cart graveyard.” FINGER IN
THE DYKE was heard to comment, “This is why I can’t find a f*&king grocery cart when I go shopping!”
We continued on through swampy sewage, under trees, and through branches. CUM NAIL ME stopped to
pick stickers out of his socks. When we exited the swamp, Hash Flash GEEZER TEASER was waiting with
her camera. The scribes, along with PSYCHOBITCH, ended up off trail somehow and had to traverse
through another homeless camp. Back on trail they came across “Hare Snare” by POOR AIM and JUST SAY
NO TO CRACK. POOR AIM continued on with SIN D BARE and helped lay trail to the finish. Downdowns were slow getting started because CRACK couldn’t think of anything funny to say. Beer wench
PIXILATED PUSSY had on her socks and jammies, and was probably freezing as we stood around behind
the Target loading dock. We honored one new boot, visitor from LAH3 DUMBALLS, and wieners FINGER
and POOR AIM. We had a mess of returners including LBH3 Founder ZAPATA, ERECTION YOUR
NIPPLESCHNITZEL got her 269th patch and OH ENEMA got her 25th. NICE HAIR FAG successfully
nominated SPANKEE YANKEE for hashit because at the Monday LA Hash, she drove over a median in front
of two cops and managed to get out of a ticket because she told them, “No speakee Engrish.” MR RAT’S
ASS, 6-9 SPLIT and 4NLAY serenaded her with a song about bad Asian drivers. NIPPLESCHNITZEL was
deemed guilty of a hash crime for reading How to Run a Marathon during down-downs. SIN D BARE
couldn’t pronounce the name of the on-on because it was in Spanish, so he had to ask VICTORIA’S
SECRETION to announce the location as Los Mariscos.

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